Speaker 1: Elvis Duran, Elvis Duran Phone Tap the Return of Michael Oppenheimer.
Speaker 1: Listen to this email. Dear Elvis Durant, Dominic Palmary hates telemarketers.
Speaker 1: He despises them so much. One night he went out
Speaker 1: and bought that Tella zapper, that thing you hook up
Speaker 1: to your phone line to help prevent phone marketers from
Speaker 1: getting through. Well, now he gets annoyed when the machine
Speaker 1: doesn't work. He spent all that money and they still
Speaker 1: get through. This is a job for Michael Oppenheimer. He
Speaker 1: should be the next telemarketer to break through the tele
Speaker 1: A Zapper barrier. This comes to us from a net.
Speaker 1: Now Anett wants us to play this phone tap on.
Speaker 1: Dominic Palmary Scary is going to play the part of
Speaker 1: Michael Oppenheimer.
Speaker 2: A Nett will be listening in on the call. Here
Speaker 2: we go a good morning. Listen to mister Michael oppenheimen
Speaker 2: with onisday dot com. How are you doing today's sir? Okay,
Speaker 2: we're here with a wonderful product called Meatball Magic.
Speaker 3: Okay, I'm on a do not call list. Please we
Speaker 3: move mind from you and Liz.
Speaker 2: We don't have any record of that at this time. Sir,
Speaker 2: you can make your own meatballs in minutes and store them.
Speaker 3: No, I'm not. I'm really not interested in it.
Speaker 2: A meatball magic is in me.
Speaker 3: There's no reason to go on, sir. I'm not interested
Speaker 3: in your product, but you.
Speaker 2: Could make nine meatballs in just seconds, Sir.
Speaker 3: I don't eat meatballs?
Speaker 2: Are you Italian? Sir?
Speaker 3: I'm sorry?
Speaker 2: Are you Italian?
Speaker 3: Well?
Speaker 2: This is mister Michael Oppenheimer from dot com.
Speaker 3: You just call me, sir.
Speaker 2: I guess we didn't finish our conversation, sir.
Speaker 3: No we did. I'm not interested in the product.
Speaker 2: You can easily shape ground meat into perfect spheres as.
Speaker 3: Long as they're tasty and they fill me up. That's
Speaker 3: okay that the shape doesn't matter.
Speaker 2: Are you going to order one of our metal now?
Speaker 3: So I'm not leave me alone?
Speaker 2: Italians and meatballs go hand in hand.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but I don't need your magic meatball maker. Please
Speaker 3: stop calling. You start to make me aggubated.
Speaker 2: Now, what is your credit card at this time the
Speaker 2: cold day.
Speaker 3: Of freaking hell. I give you my credit card number.
Speaker 2: All I need now is your credit card.
Speaker 3: I'm not giving you my credit card. Well, an idiot,
Speaker 3: send it to your house, says to you that can
Speaker 3: call over your house for a Sunday dinner and you
Speaker 3: can make the magic meatballs.
Speaker 2: So can I have your credit card number? This time?
Speaker 2: I'm gonna hang out.
Speaker 3: Wat I already told you that. Why not, sir, because
Speaker 3: my meatballs are good as they are. You know we
Speaker 3: make our meatballs.
Speaker 2: How do you do that? Sir?
Speaker 3: I swallow a handful of chop meat, and then I
Speaker 3: press really hard. I pushed. You push your push, and
Speaker 3: then they come out perfectly round.
Speaker 2: There's the other end that's not very sanitary.
Speaker 3: Ah, yeah, no doub because you started to make me aggravated.
Speaker 2: Hey, where do you live, sir by? Where do you live?
Speaker 3: Well?
Speaker 2: You seem to be getting disconnected. This is mister, I
Speaker 2: know you are, buddy.
Speaker 3: This is like the fourth time you call me the
Speaker 3: last fifteen minutes.
Speaker 2: You take some ground chop meat. I'm calling the.
Speaker 3: Phone company to file a charge. You take the meatballs,
Speaker 3: take the meatballs, stum down your throat so you don't
Speaker 3: have to call me anymore.
Speaker 2: All you do is take the plastic piece and press so.
Speaker 3: You don't breathe while you're stuffing the meatballs down your
Speaker 3: throat and leave me alone, all right?
Speaker 2: So you press the meat.
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, and then you you press your face up
Speaker 3: against the wall so you look like a squashed meat
Speaker 3: ball when.
Speaker 2: You lift the plates are all perfectly rounded, right.
Speaker 3: Yeah, for a perfectly sphracle, right like your brain with
Speaker 3: nothing in it.
Speaker 2: How would you like to order it this time?
Speaker 3: Give me twenty of them, give me album gonna make
Speaker 3: nine out of times. It's andre and eighty meat balls.
Speaker 2: I'm holding for your credit card, obviously.
Speaker 3: R O. The word no means I'm not interested in
Speaker 3: a stupid thing. City Mark. You kill him with, chill
Speaker 3: him hurt? What is this?
Speaker 2: This is mister Michael, and.
Speaker 3: Ask you about that. Michael. Yeah, here's what I here's
Speaker 3: what I did to your magic meatballs. Listen to this,
Speaker 3: so no, that is what is that? That was my
Speaker 3: collar ball.
Speaker 2: That would be a colossal waste of the meatball magic.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I know, I know. Well that's what goes in there,
Speaker 3: colossal waste. Come on, will cut it out now, sir.
Speaker 2: This is mister Michael.
Speaker 3: I know who to this is. Cut it out.
Speaker 2: This is actually Skewy Jones. When you've been phone tapped.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, oh my god. Yeah, this was on
Speaker 3: the radio.
Speaker 2: This was all the nets idea and.
Speaker 3: That you got me, You got me. That guy was
Speaker 3: a paint in the neck. You will not go.
Speaker 2: This phone table was pre recorded permission granted by all participants.
Speaker 3: Phone tab
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