WEBVTT - Getting Open with Jalyn Holmes

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<v Speaker 1>Hi, everybody. My name is Lindsay Young and I am

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<v Speaker 1>an assistant editor and staff writer here with the Minnesota Vikings.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm super excited to bring you guys a new content

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<v Speaker 1>series called Getting Open Vikings Talk Mental Health. We are

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<v Speaker 1>going to bring you weekly segments that will include a

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<v Speaker 1>written story and feature, and it will also include the

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<v Speaker 1>opportunity to listen to the full audio interview like you're

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<v Speaker 1>doing right now. Throughout the series, you will be able

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<v Speaker 1>to hear personal experiences from players and others within the

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<v Speaker 1>Vikings organization. We will share information about how the Vikings

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<v Speaker 1>are working to put an emphasis on mental health and

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<v Speaker 1>to care for those that are staff, players, coaches, everybody

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<v Speaker 1>in the building. We will also share some of the

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<v Speaker 1>players foundations doing a lot of work in the area

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<v Speaker 1>of mental health. Our first conversation is with Vikings defensive

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<v Speaker 1>lineman Jalen Holmes, who this season will be entering his

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<v Speaker 1>fourth year with Minnesota. He shared with me some of

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<v Speaker 1>his personal experiences from growing up, how he kind of

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<v Speaker 1>came to find out that anxiety was an official diagnosis

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<v Speaker 1>for him, and the tools that he's used over the

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<v Speaker 1>years to treat it, recover and also connect with other

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<v Speaker 1>people who have similar experiences. Here is our conversation with

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<v Speaker 1>Jalen Holmes. Can you just tell us a little bit

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<v Speaker 1>about your experience around mental health and what that's looked

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<v Speaker 1>like in your life. I feel like at first, when

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<v Speaker 1>I first started struggling with it, for me, I didn't

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<v Speaker 1>know what it was. You know, you really don't get toted.

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<v Speaker 1>You don't get that's not something to get towle at

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<v Speaker 1>school or you know. I really never had like people

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<v Speaker 1>tell me about like the symptoms or whatever if I'm mental.

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<v Speaker 1>I just was experiencing and then just trying to deal

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<v Speaker 1>with the best way I knew how. But I feel like,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, as time grew and I grew as a person,

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<v Speaker 1>and I grew as a father, as I grew as

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<v Speaker 1>a man, I started to acknowledge some of the things

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<v Speaker 1>that was making me feel different, I guess, and I

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<v Speaker 1>just tried to attack it. Really from there, I answer

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<v Speaker 1>you a question, what age was that when you first

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<v Speaker 1>started experiencing feeling different? You know? Was that in college?

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<v Speaker 1>Was that in high school? What did that look like?

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, I feel like different things that happened. You

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<v Speaker 1>know where I was from it and it's the community

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<v Speaker 1>I grew up in me different things just seeing you know,

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<v Speaker 1>people getting killed. Now I knew H went to, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>the school I went to. It was a lot of

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<v Speaker 1>different things going in there. So maybe maybe middle school,

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<v Speaker 1>high school you started experience other things. But it never

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<v Speaker 1>really liked hit me. But I feel like it really

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<v Speaker 1>like got brought to my attention and I had to

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<v Speaker 1>I knew I had to act on it. It's when

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<v Speaker 1>I got to the NFL. Okay, you're you're kind of

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<v Speaker 1>speaking generally about mental health. I know you've shared specifically

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<v Speaker 1>things on your social media about depression, and we'll get

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<v Speaker 1>to that here in the second. But it's depression. The

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<v Speaker 1>main piece that you are affected by it that you

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<v Speaker 1>deal with depression, anxiety, both of those two things. I

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<v Speaker 1>feel like it was a time where, you know, I

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<v Speaker 1>was really going through my own depression. I don't even

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<v Speaker 1>know how to like put it, but definitely anxiety. It's

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<v Speaker 1>everyday better with anxiety. It's times where you know, I

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<v Speaker 1>can get overwhelmed and it can go enough, and it's

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<v Speaker 1>times where I'm good and i'm and I can get

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<v Speaker 1>things done. You know, I feel like I got to

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<v Speaker 1>have I'm a perfectionist in a way, So certain things

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<v Speaker 1>has to go a certain way, and you know, sometimes

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<v Speaker 1>anxiety can have another plan for you, you know. So

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<v Speaker 1>I feel like anxiety is the most it's the everyday

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<v Speaker 1>thing I still do. What have you found that's been

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<v Speaker 1>helpful for you? Like the most helpful thing is just

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<v Speaker 1>talking about it, you know, just having a I mean

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<v Speaker 1>you having this conversation about it right now. I feel

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<v Speaker 1>like a lot of people go experience anxiety and they

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<v Speaker 1>don't even know. And I feel like me, once I

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<v Speaker 1>decided to be vulnerable and able to talk about it

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<v Speaker 1>with anyone or share it on a public platform, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>it kind of made me feel good because you could

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<v Speaker 1>relate to it. And once you find people that can

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<v Speaker 1>relate to the same thing you're going through, it kind

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<v Speaker 1>of makes it a little easier, you know, Like you

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<v Speaker 1>don't feel that as crazy, because sometimes you feel like

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<v Speaker 1>you're going through this big anxiety battle or whatever mental

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<v Speaker 1>health you know, battle you got going on. You think

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<v Speaker 1>you're the only one that you're just going through it.

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<v Speaker 1>You feel crazy when you hear somebody else shit the

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<v Speaker 1>same things, and it's like, oh, I'm not I'm not

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<v Speaker 1>not crazy, I'm not tripping, And you can share those,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, different stories you have honestly helps has football

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<v Speaker 1>and you know, being an athlete, has that been helpful

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<v Speaker 1>for your mental health? What's crazy is sometimes that's you know,

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<v Speaker 1>like sometimes I can go in, I can walk into

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<v Speaker 1>work and it's like everything that's going on in life.

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<v Speaker 1>I can lead in the car and I can go

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<v Speaker 1>go working in football takes me completely from it. But

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<v Speaker 1>sometimes football is one of the stressors that you know,

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<v Speaker 1>heightens it. So it goes either way. And that's why

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<v Speaker 1>I feel like, you know, as you know, trying to

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<v Speaker 1>use my platform as an athlete to share with you know,

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<v Speaker 1>other athletes in the NFL, college or high school, whatever.

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<v Speaker 1>Our job can be our stressers, and it's just talking

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<v Speaker 1>about it and communicating with others and being vulnerable and

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<v Speaker 1>then talking about whatever you're going through. I feel like,

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<v Speaker 1>you know that that actually helps. So you know, what

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<v Speaker 1>we do sometimes can also bring us down. Have things

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<v Speaker 1>kind of gotten easier? Have you found kind of a

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<v Speaker 1>way to balance that anxiety with your career. When I

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<v Speaker 1>first got in to the I didn't know what it was.

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<v Speaker 1>It was so much going on in my own head

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<v Speaker 1>because I'm an overthinker. I overthink everything and uh, and

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<v Speaker 1>that sometimes it is a blessed and other times, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>it can definitely be a curse. So when I first

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<v Speaker 1>got to the NFL, I had no way. And I

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<v Speaker 1>feel like as I you know, pointing out the problem

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<v Speaker 1>that was in my life with anxiety and dealing with

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<v Speaker 1>those things, I learned how to deal with it a

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<v Speaker 1>little bit more. I still know on the way how

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<v Speaker 1>to deal with it, but every day I'm getting better

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<v Speaker 1>at it. So I'm at a point now where you know,

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<v Speaker 1>I could recognize it and try to you know, fix

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<v Speaker 1>it and then go on. So I just feel like,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, as my journey goes on, I'm just getting

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<v Speaker 1>better with it every day, and I'm just trying to

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<v Speaker 1>try new practices and you know, follow those different pages

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<v Speaker 1>or you know, going to therapy and just being open

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<v Speaker 1>about talking going to therapy as it definitely has. Are

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<v Speaker 1>there people in your life, either in the Vikings organization

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<v Speaker 1>or in your family or friends that have been especially

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<v Speaker 1>helpful and supportive for you? And how important is that? Oh? Yeah? So,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, glad of my friends from back home, A

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<v Speaker 1>lot of guys I played you know, football with at

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<v Speaker 1>Ohio State. You know, we still keep a content and

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<v Speaker 1>I have a real good friend. He's also the guyfather

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<v Speaker 1>of my child, Tracy Sprinkle. We we both has been

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<v Speaker 1>balanced this together in a way. And you know some

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<v Speaker 1>days where you know our anxiety, his society can't be

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<v Speaker 1>going a certain way. It tell me like, bro, I'm

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<v Speaker 1>struggling right now, like I need help, and this vice

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<v Speaker 1>versas saying with me like I just tell him a

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<v Speaker 1>birth today, not a good day, like I need you know,

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<v Speaker 1>I need some help. So that's why I said, like

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<v Speaker 1>being vulnerable has helped me a lot, because I'm not

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<v Speaker 1>saying being vulnerable within everybody. You've obviously you gotta you know,

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<v Speaker 1>have that trust with people. But once you have the

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<v Speaker 1>people that you could trust and you could talk to,

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<v Speaker 1>be completely vulnerable with them because you know they can help.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, you can't do this all by yourself. And

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<v Speaker 1>I had that, you know, that mentality where take care

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<v Speaker 1>of my family, I take care of my son, I

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<v Speaker 1>take care of so many different people out I have

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<v Speaker 1>two businesses, I have people who work in the business.

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<v Speaker 1>You gotta you gotta be the guy. Sometimes you gotta

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<v Speaker 1>lean on someone else. And you know, I'm blessed to

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<v Speaker 1>have no friends and I can do that. Do you

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<v Speaker 1>think that there's a stigma around mental illness, either in

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<v Speaker 1>the general society or within athletics. Yes, uh, well not

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<v Speaker 1>post those you know, reposts that people will are you okay?

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<v Speaker 1>Or like do I and it's like I'm actually having

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<v Speaker 1>a good day, Like I'm just sharing everymas because you

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<v Speaker 1>just never know who made need to see that. I

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<v Speaker 1>just feel like sometimes when you talk about it, people think,

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<v Speaker 1>like will be crazy or sick or you know, you

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<v Speaker 1>could be suicide, and and that's not it. I feel

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<v Speaker 1>like everybody struggles with mental health in some way. It's

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<v Speaker 1>just who willing to talking about it and who's not.

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<v Speaker 1>I feel like, especially within the NFL, within this past

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<v Speaker 1>year or two, teams and organizations have been working on

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<v Speaker 1>breaking that stigma, right And you have guys like Dak Prescott,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, like talked about his experience with depression. What

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<v Speaker 1>impact do you think it has when you're having these

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<v Speaker 1>athletes who are on these big platforms be vulnerable and

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<v Speaker 1>share that they struggle with these things too. It's a

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<v Speaker 1>huge impact. And it's definitely especially being a you know,

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<v Speaker 1>an African American athlete with our community like that's not

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<v Speaker 1>talked about it at all. You know, a lot of

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<v Speaker 1>conversation with my dad about this. He was at dentialized

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<v Speaker 1>night and we were just talking about being vulnerable and

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<v Speaker 1>no general roles and masculinity all those different things where

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<v Speaker 1>you know, those are not conversations that's had. So when

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<v Speaker 1>you got Da Presscott and like myself talking about the

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<v Speaker 1>kids who who's watching every movie? They watched everything? Do

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<v Speaker 1>they try to dress like us? They try to memic

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<v Speaker 1>us on the field everything right now? What they trying

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<v Speaker 1>to memic you? Being vulnerable talking about you know, the

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<v Speaker 1>mental things that should go through that that only helps

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<v Speaker 1>them and it helps them to be more advanced at

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<v Speaker 1>an early age. Just about looking at that pressure. Do

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<v Speaker 1>you think that talking about it, going to therapy, I'm

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<v Speaker 1>learning more information about mental illness and about anxiety. Do

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<v Speaker 1>you think that's helped you become a better family man,

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<v Speaker 1>become a better dad to your son? Yeah? It has.

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<v Speaker 1>It definitely has made me more gentle. I just feel

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<v Speaker 1>like I've never been a real super like I'm with

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<v Speaker 1>my son man, that's like my best friend, you know.

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<v Speaker 1>So it's just now like certain words or certain things

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<v Speaker 1>can be said and you know everybody's not gonna take

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<v Speaker 1>it a week you meant to, you know, say it.

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<v Speaker 1>So it's just I feel like learning these things and

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<v Speaker 1>just seeing him grow. He just got his first haircut

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<v Speaker 1>a cow weeks ago, and it's just like, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>it's just saying encouraging words to him all the time,

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<v Speaker 1>just doing different things to build those small building blocks

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<v Speaker 1>to add up to where he can be strong basically,

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<v Speaker 1>not just physically. You and I kind of started talking

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<v Speaker 1>because I saw, like you said that you had posted

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<v Speaker 1>some things on your social media and I could tell

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<v Speaker 1>because you were posting those things that that was something

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<v Speaker 1>that you were comfortable about. Why is it important for

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<v Speaker 1>you to share your story publicly? I just feel like,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, I have a real mixed feelings about social

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<v Speaker 1>media anyway, but I feel like the good about it

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<v Speaker 1>is you can you can get information not doing right.

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<v Speaker 1>So I just feel like, you know, if I could

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<v Speaker 1>just share as much helpful information and I can help

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<v Speaker 1>one person, you know, it just helps people just be

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<v Speaker 1>more comfortable. And that's what I want. I want to

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<v Speaker 1>normalize talking about mental health and not seeming like you're crazy.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, like crazy and mental health get put together

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<v Speaker 1>too much, and that's not it. Because if that's the

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<v Speaker 1>case all of us are crazy because we all deal

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<v Speaker 1>with so I just I just want to normalize the conversation.

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<v Speaker 1>You said everybody probably deals with mental illness to some degree, right,

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<v Speaker 1>some people more than others. But this past year has

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<v Speaker 1>been especially I think hard, probably for everybody at different levels.

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<v Speaker 1>But you have the racial injustice that's going on, you

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<v Speaker 1>have the pandemic and people losing loved ones or people

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<v Speaker 1>just trying, you know, being isolated. How much more important

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<v Speaker 1>do you think, just during this year is it to

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<v Speaker 1>connect with others to talk about mental health and how

0:12:00.520 --> 0:12:03.880
<v Speaker 1>important that is? This is? I mean, we're in the pandemic,

0:12:03.960 --> 0:12:08.240
<v Speaker 1>you know, like it's traumatic for everyone. I mean kids

0:12:08.360 --> 0:12:11.440
<v Speaker 1>is going to school online. I didn't start going to

0:12:11.440 --> 0:12:13.240
<v Speaker 1>school lots. I got to college and a lot of

0:12:13.280 --> 0:12:16.080
<v Speaker 1>people struggle with that. You got kids doing that too.

0:12:16.120 --> 0:12:19.560
<v Speaker 1>So I just feel like, you know, this pandemic has

0:12:19.760 --> 0:12:21.880
<v Speaker 1>shown a lot a lot of a lot of bad

0:12:21.920 --> 0:12:23.800
<v Speaker 1>and also a lot of good. I feel like, you know,

0:12:23.880 --> 0:12:27.240
<v Speaker 1>for me, especially doing this pandemic, I tried to focus

0:12:27.240 --> 0:12:30.160
<v Speaker 1>on myself because it's just challenging, especially you know, with

0:12:30.320 --> 0:12:33.760
<v Speaker 1>COVID there's so many new things. It's always have to

0:12:33.800 --> 0:12:36.040
<v Speaker 1>stand your toes. It could be one way this week

0:12:36.280 --> 0:12:40.480
<v Speaker 1>the makes way, it's completely different, and it's for your

0:12:40.520 --> 0:12:44.319
<v Speaker 1>mental health. That's you know, that's taxing. So you gotta

0:12:44.400 --> 0:12:46.560
<v Speaker 1>you gotta pay attention to that. And you know, I

0:12:46.559 --> 0:12:49.640
<v Speaker 1>feel like this pandemic has definitely shown a lot. And

0:12:49.720 --> 0:12:51.880
<v Speaker 1>then you're talking about anxiety. You know there's different types

0:12:51.920 --> 0:12:54.960
<v Speaker 1>of anxiety. Um are there you know, kind of specific

0:12:54.960 --> 0:12:56.920
<v Speaker 1>triggers for you or is it more of a generalized

0:12:56.960 --> 0:12:59.080
<v Speaker 1>anxiety that you kind of can kind of crop up

0:12:59.080 --> 0:13:01.679
<v Speaker 1>at any time. I just I just feel like a

0:13:01.760 --> 0:13:06.679
<v Speaker 1>lot of athletes correlate to this. You know, in a sense,

0:13:06.800 --> 0:13:10.160
<v Speaker 1>you are the person that everybody goes to because you

0:13:10.200 --> 0:13:13.600
<v Speaker 1>know the image that people think the NFL comes with

0:13:13.640 --> 0:13:17.880
<v Speaker 1>the money, all all that different things. Right, Sometimes you

0:13:17.920 --> 0:13:20.960
<v Speaker 1>forget to take care of you. And a lot of

0:13:21.000 --> 0:13:27.360
<v Speaker 1>times when I'm gay, planning and practicing, rehabbing, family, are

0:13:27.480 --> 0:13:30.280
<v Speaker 1>everything coming at you one time? You know, you try

0:13:30.280 --> 0:13:32.439
<v Speaker 1>to attack everything at one time and then you look

0:13:32.520 --> 0:13:36.200
<v Speaker 1>up overwhelmed. And then it's been times where I've been

0:13:36.240 --> 0:13:39.320
<v Speaker 1>so overwhelmed I break down. I don't know what from

0:13:39.360 --> 0:13:41.319
<v Speaker 1>my phone off, I got an attitude with everybody. I'm

0:13:41.640 --> 0:13:44.400
<v Speaker 1>I'm just and then snap back out of it. And

0:13:45.080 --> 0:13:46.960
<v Speaker 1>I never knew what that was, and I thought about it,

0:13:47.040 --> 0:13:49.439
<v Speaker 1>you know, went to therapy, and my difference like that's

0:13:49.440 --> 0:13:52.559
<v Speaker 1>because I do you know, like this job is so

0:13:53.679 --> 0:13:55.719
<v Speaker 1>it could be one way one week and another way

0:13:55.760 --> 0:13:58.000
<v Speaker 1>the next. You know how the NFL seas that can

0:13:58.040 --> 0:14:00.720
<v Speaker 1>be an emotional roller coaster within itself. So just trying

0:14:00.720 --> 0:14:03.200
<v Speaker 1>to stay on everywhere close and keeping itself together it's

0:14:03.240 --> 0:14:05.600
<v Speaker 1>probably the most taxing part of it. I just I

0:14:05.640 --> 0:14:07.480
<v Speaker 1>just feel like, you know, you gotta deal with those

0:14:07.480 --> 0:14:09.920
<v Speaker 1>things because you know, we are a lot of us

0:14:09.920 --> 0:14:12.679
<v Speaker 1>are you know, the heads of our family, and you

0:14:12.760 --> 0:14:15.199
<v Speaker 1>can't get to take care of yourself because you're taking

0:14:15.200 --> 0:14:17.800
<v Speaker 1>care of so many other people. What are maybe some

0:14:17.880 --> 0:14:19.960
<v Speaker 1>other things in your daily life that you can do,

0:14:20.000 --> 0:14:22.520
<v Speaker 1>you know, is it is it getting away from social media,

0:14:22.560 --> 0:14:24.440
<v Speaker 1>as it playing with your son? Is it watching tv?

0:14:24.600 --> 0:14:27.040
<v Speaker 1>What does self care look like for you? Self care

0:14:27.080 --> 0:14:29.000
<v Speaker 1>for me? Was you know the first one of the

0:14:29.040 --> 0:14:30.720
<v Speaker 1>best things I did, and I did this a lot

0:14:30.760 --> 0:14:34.440
<v Speaker 1>about the year, was I would delete Instagram all week

0:14:35.120 --> 0:14:38.080
<v Speaker 1>and now I would get back on Instagram maybe like Friday,

0:14:38.200 --> 0:14:40.920
<v Speaker 1>like on my way traveling while I had nothing to do.

0:14:41.240 --> 0:14:44.200
<v Speaker 1>Definitely getting rid of social media was a big helper

0:14:44.240 --> 0:14:48.720
<v Speaker 1>for me. Um reading, uh, playing with my son, just

0:14:49.200 --> 0:14:52.800
<v Speaker 1>pay it to the things that really matter, and just

0:14:52.800 --> 0:14:55.720
<v Speaker 1>just learning more about you know, anxiety and different things

0:14:55.760 --> 0:14:58.200
<v Speaker 1>like that, just talking about like a conversations, were having

0:14:58.280 --> 0:15:01.040
<v Speaker 1>lunch right here, or you know, building my businesses, just

0:15:01.120 --> 0:15:04.720
<v Speaker 1>keeping myself busy, just keeping myself away from you know things.

0:15:04.720 --> 0:15:07.400
<v Speaker 1>And also I just started meditating too, so that's that's

0:15:07.400 --> 0:15:10.040
<v Speaker 1>actually a good deal as well. So you know, I

0:15:10.080 --> 0:15:12.280
<v Speaker 1>feel like just doing what you love and just finding

0:15:12.320 --> 0:15:14.720
<v Speaker 1>peace with yourself. And it could be whatever it is.

0:15:14.920 --> 0:15:18.240
<v Speaker 1>It can be right, it could be something that's just

0:15:19.080 --> 0:15:22.600
<v Speaker 1>relaxed comment you can just think your way through some

0:15:22.680 --> 0:15:25.640
<v Speaker 1>things and not even think at all, just be still.

0:15:31.320 --> 0:15:34.520
<v Speaker 1>Our thanks to Jayleen Holmes for sitting down and sharing

0:15:34.560 --> 0:15:37.880
<v Speaker 1>those thoughts and experiences with us. We look forward to

0:15:37.920 --> 0:15:40.680
<v Speaker 1>sharing additional stories and features with you as part of

0:15:40.680 --> 0:15:44.360
<v Speaker 1>our Getting Open series. New features will drop weekly on

0:15:44.520 --> 0:15:46.040
<v Speaker 1>Viking's digital platforms.