Speaker 1: He I suck Good Dating with Dean, Vanessa and Jared
Speaker 1: and I Heart radio podcast. Hello everyone, welcome to a
Speaker 1: new episode of help by Second Dating. I'm Jared Haven,
Speaker 1: joined by the beautiful of Vanesso Grimaldi, Dean. Hi, guys.
Speaker 1: Dean Anglert is not in studio right now. He's running
Speaker 1: a little bit late, and our first guest canceled on this,
Speaker 1: so we're really just winging it right now. Pretty good,
Speaker 1: So we do best. Yeah, I feel like that's what
Speaker 1: we do best. Vanessa, how are you? How's everything? I'm good.
Speaker 1: It's finally a sunny day. And if you can see
Speaker 1: my outside my window right now, but it's finally a
Speaker 1: sunny day Montreal. It's been brutal March. I feel like
Speaker 1: I don't know what it's like back in Lex. Thank
Speaker 1: you forgetting what what what nice weather is like. But
Speaker 1: March is just brutal because you think winter is over,
Speaker 1: and for anyone that lives in a city or country
Speaker 1: that has snow, you can totally understand my pain. It's
Speaker 1: like I just can't wait for a sprint to come
Speaker 1: along and for me to have some sort of energy back.
Speaker 1: March sucks, Mark, I remember mart Island. March is the
Speaker 1: worst because every but he just assumes that snow is December, January, February,
Speaker 1: and then March comes and weather changes and it doesn't
Speaker 1: because it just hits you. It's like blind sides you
Speaker 1: with snow because you think here springs right around the corner,
Speaker 1: and then boom, eight inches of snow. Yeah. Well, we
Speaker 1: say an Italian matso pazzo, which basically means March is
Speaker 1: crazy because you never know. There's always that one last
Speaker 1: snowfall that you're going to get, and I feel like
Speaker 1: it's probably gonna happen someday soon, and then it's going
Speaker 1: to be like a week of spring in Montreal, and
Speaker 1: then summer is going to be for two months. Always
Speaker 1: one upping me. She has to speak a town on
Speaker 1: this podcast. I speak too language. I speak English and
Speaker 1: bad English. Do you notice to my Rhode Island accents? Sometimes?
Speaker 1: You know what the thing about Rhoe Islanders? Yeah, it's bad.
Speaker 1: I hate myself for it because sometimes I'll add ours
Speaker 1: to words I don't even know why, and then sometimes
Speaker 1: I'll drop ours from words that are supposed to be there,
Speaker 1: like ca pok. You know, that's kind of like the
Speaker 1: Boston side of me. I think We're Island has its
Speaker 1: own unique language, though I find myself sometimes saying ours
Speaker 1: and words that just don't belong and I don't know why,
Speaker 1: and it makes me feel like a big dummy. But
Speaker 1: that's okay. What are you gonna go far from a dummy?
Speaker 1: You don't feel like I have an accent when I speak, um,
Speaker 1: what do you do? What you do is you pronounce
Speaker 1: your words very very well, like when you say important,
Speaker 1: you know, you pronounce your tease and make sure that
Speaker 1: I haven't mean to bring something up to you there
Speaker 1: is I can't remember what we were talking about, but
Speaker 1: a couple of weeks back, you were talking about what
Speaker 1: we in America would call exzema, but you said exem yeah,
Speaker 1: and I was like, oh god, I think Vanessa saying
Speaker 1: because I'm a man, I wanted to correct you. I's like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, Vanessa saying it wrong. Oh I should
Speaker 1: say something, but kept to myself and then I texted
Speaker 1: my my brother in law, who is from uh He's
Speaker 1: from Manitoba. I was like, how do you say this word?
Speaker 1: And I said, I wrote at zema and he wrote
Speaker 1: he sent back exeema. I'm like Oh, that's that's a
Speaker 1: Canadian thing. I had no idea. Yeah, we make up
Speaker 1: our own. I thought it was more about what really
Speaker 1: because we speak to languages and sometimes I get confused.
Speaker 1: Like I remember on the show when we're filming The Bachelor,
Speaker 1: I was on the couch like right before I think
Speaker 1: it was the last date before the engagement episode, and
Speaker 1: I was talking to Nick. They didn't air this because
Speaker 1: he stopped and he started laughing everyone started laughing at me.
Speaker 1: I was like, I feel so stupid. Wait, how do
Speaker 1: I say it? Contribute? But you got but the real
Speaker 1: way things contribute? Yeah, And he just I was like
Speaker 1: talking about I want to be able to contribute to
Speaker 1: the relationship and blah blah blah blah. And I was
Speaker 1: really into what I was talking about, and he just
Speaker 1: tasked me. He's like, contribute and I was like, what
Speaker 1: are you talking about? You mean contribute? English is such
Speaker 1: a weird language. Think about Well, anyway, I guess we should.
Speaker 1: I guess we should talk about dating stuff, right, I
Speaker 1: don't know. This is a podcast about relationships and stuff.
Speaker 1: There was an article, actually, Vanessa that I saw you
Speaker 1: brought to my attention about bad Boyfriend Alert did you
Speaker 1: see this. Honestly, you saw because you're the one who
Speaker 1: presented to me. So there's an article on It's the
Speaker 1: Taco the Taco dot com. I don't know what that is,
Speaker 1: but of course headlines bad boyfriend if he does ten
Speaker 1: of these twenty things run for the hills. Uh wait,
Speaker 1: did you read them? Because there's some of them that
Speaker 1: I'm like, I think there's some guys that I've dated
Speaker 1: that did hit ten of them, but I'm like, they're
Speaker 1: not through. They weren't bad boyfriends. But let's look at them.
Speaker 1: So the like number twenty, he makes his girl feel
Speaker 1: guilty for being happy. I think that this is just
Speaker 1: bad characteristics of a bad human being. Like, that's what
Speaker 1: it is. Like a lot of these things are like
Speaker 1: he makes his girl feel guilty for being happy. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's just being in you know, Yeah, exactly. And then
Speaker 1: the other one too, he disappoints her every time they
Speaker 1: make plans. Number eighteen he constantly texts his ex. But
Speaker 1: they're just friends. Listen, if you're in a relationship and
Speaker 1: some dude, whether actually whoever it is, boy girl, doesn't
Speaker 1: matter if they're texting their ex. Big problem, big red
Speaker 1: fire you mentioned and you were honest about how you
Speaker 1: were still friends with an ex of yours an X
Speaker 1: who and sorry, not an ex? No, you're I'm getting
Speaker 1: this story wrong. You're your best friend is a female? Yes, so,
Speaker 1: well one of my closest friends. Yeah, her name is Crystal.
Speaker 1: I've been friends with her for a while. Um And well, actually,
Speaker 1: well here's the thing. So when actually and I first
Speaker 1: became friends, actually couldn't understand the concept that I was
Speaker 1: really close friends with this particular girl and we're both single,
Speaker 1: because she just assumed that this girl must have had
Speaker 1: a crush on me, which was never the case. And
Speaker 1: then she met Crystal and found out that it was
Speaker 1: so much more of a brother sister relationship than anything else.
Speaker 1: And she's not an X at all, Like I I
Speaker 1: I used to be friends with my ex. Um. But
Speaker 1: I think when you're in a relationship, unfortunately, it just
Speaker 1: has to change on both sides because it makes the
Speaker 1: other person feel uncomfortable. Yeah, And I think, and I say,
Speaker 1: there's no reason we're in twenty nineteen now, there's no
Speaker 1: reason of having to completely hate the person that you
Speaker 1: dated in order to move on from a relationship. I
Speaker 1: think you have to forgive forgive yourself for you know,
Speaker 1: the feelings that you had, and then forgive the person
Speaker 1: for what they did to you, and you can still
Speaker 1: have an amicable is that an English word? Amicable? Amicable relationship,
Speaker 1: amicable relationship? Um. I I'm really good friends with one
Speaker 1: X of mine who basically right after the show aired,
Speaker 1: he he was the only ex that called me and
Speaker 1: texted me and was super supportive. And I was like,
Speaker 1: I'm buying your u r L named Vanessa gamalta dot
Speaker 1: com before someone else takes it, and he was just
Speaker 1: really supportive and then yeah, um, and you know, but
Speaker 1: whenever I'm in like a relationship, he understands, and I
Speaker 1: understand whenever he's in a relationship that the texting is
Speaker 1: not frequent or almost stops completely. Um, And there's no
Speaker 1: there's no hard feelings there, don't you find though it's
Speaker 1: easier to move on from a breakup if you hate
Speaker 1: the other person. I know, but that's that's yes, that
Speaker 1: but it makes sense though, Like, Okay, let's say Jared,
Speaker 1: you are okay, Let's say I break up with this
Speaker 1: guy that I'm dating now okay, because you guys are engaged.
Speaker 1: I don't even want to put that like bad Judo
Speaker 1: on you and Ashley. So let's say the guy that
Speaker 1: I'm no bad jud So let's say the guy I
Speaker 1: am dating now breaks up with me. It would be
Speaker 1: so much easier for me to like hate his guts
Speaker 1: in order to just like totally think all the bad
Speaker 1: things that he's done or turn like turn off all
Speaker 1: the good stuff that that has happened in our relationship
Speaker 1: and in order to move on just like, oh, I'm
Speaker 1: better off without him. No no, no, no no no, but
Speaker 1: I want to And that's like the old men And
Speaker 1: I'm really honest about this, but it's so much healthier
Speaker 1: for you in order to appreciate the person for the
Speaker 1: positives that they've given you. Yeah, And I just find
Speaker 1: the yes and no. Because I went through a breakup
Speaker 1: in my early twenties with somebody that was dying for
Speaker 1: very long time, who's the most wonderful person, and there
Speaker 1: was no reason for the breakup. It just felt like
Speaker 1: it was time to go our separate ways. And I'm
Speaker 1: it took honestly, probably about eight months between the time
Speaker 1: that we broke up to really cut it off because
Speaker 1: there wasn't any reason for each other to hate one another.
Speaker 1: It was it just the feelings were there as strong
Speaker 1: as they used to be, and we were growing apart
Speaker 1: and we were going in two different directions. And I
Speaker 1: found at that time other people going through breakups where
Speaker 1: they had a reason to hate that person they were
Speaker 1: breaking up with, and it was so much easier for
Speaker 1: them to move on than for me, because I didn't
Speaker 1: hate this person. I truly love them as human being,
Speaker 1: but I just don't think I was in love with
Speaker 1: them anymore. So it was this this long, horrible, exhausting
Speaker 1: breakup that ended up taking like eight months to finally
Speaker 1: really cut the cord. Because you want to just sugarcoat
Speaker 1: around everything. That's so funny that you mentioned so breakups
Speaker 1: and heartbreak. And I was reading this article and I
Speaker 1: wanted to find out and I'm switching articles now, but
Speaker 1: I wanted to find out why women. I feel like
Speaker 1: women suffer from heartbreak more than men. And I was
Speaker 1: trying to figure out why that was and why I
Speaker 1: was always as hopeless romantic and I still am why I,
Speaker 1: you know, always picture this like romantic life that I
Speaker 1: was going to have with this guy who was just
Speaker 1: going to sweep me off my feet, and it was,
Speaker 1: there was never gonna be any red flags and life
Speaker 1: would have been perfect. And then I'm like, all these
Speaker 1: freaking Disney movies I used to watch where Cinderella or
Speaker 1: The Sleeping Beauty or whoever, like, it's always a man
Speaker 1: coming in to save the woman and you know he
Speaker 1: ends up like being this super romantic guy at the
Speaker 1: end of the movie. And then if you like, graduate
Speaker 1: from Disney movies to rom comms and it's always a
Speaker 1: happy ending at the movie. That's not real life. Yeah,
Speaker 1: well those you know, those movies just playoff of gender roles,
Speaker 1: which we need more of in today's society. That was
Speaker 1: a joke, that was, but it's true. And then I
Speaker 1: was reading up on what actually is a heartbreak and
Speaker 1: they were saying heartbreak is um is. So basically, in
Speaker 1: a heartbroken syndrome, stress hormones caused the heart to enlarge,
Speaker 1: which affects the ability to pump blood, which is kind
Speaker 1: of like a mini heart attack. So there's I mean,
Speaker 1: it's a classic symptom of a heart attack. Medically it
Speaker 1: is a mini heart attack. Well I don't know if
Speaker 1: it's actually a mini heart attack, but it's a symptom
Speaker 1: of what a heart attack can feel like, yeah, it's
Speaker 1: not a wild Well this is where I read online
Speaker 1: and you know you can't. It's obviously true. Yeah, exactly
Speaker 1: like my birthdays on the twenty nine. So you're saying
Speaker 1: there's science to why women feel more heartache during a breakup. No,
Speaker 1: I was just trying to understand what isn't that? What
Speaker 1: is you know? Because when you have a heartbreak and
Speaker 1: you've experienced this before, it's just like pain that you
Speaker 1: can't really describe unless you've gone through it. And I
Speaker 1: keep getting it's like, oh, have you ever been through
Speaker 1: a heartbreak? I am the queen of getting my heartbroken,
Speaker 1: So yes, I under I totally empathize whenever someone comes
Speaker 1: to me and they have a story of you know,
Speaker 1: a relationship that didn't end up working out, and truly
Speaker 1: the only thing that helps. And I hate saying this,
Speaker 1: and I hate when anyone tells me this because that's
Speaker 1: not what you want to hear. It's time time heals all.
Speaker 1: Whether that's like for you, Jared, it was eight months
Speaker 1: to get over someone that you didn't hate, but you
Speaker 1: just fell out of love with, or you just weren't
Speaker 1: really into, or if it's someone that really did you
Speaker 1: wrong and it might take you I don't know, two weeks,
Speaker 1: a month. It's just time heals a broken heart, and
Speaker 1: it's the worst thing that you want to hear. Yeah,
Speaker 1: time does heal everything. You know what's funny about time?
Speaker 1: You want to know? It's really funny about a time.
Speaker 1: We have a time that this podcast starts at right,
Speaker 1: and we want to start on time now. In order
Speaker 1: to start on time, we need you. Look who decided
Speaker 1: to join the party? Therey is Hey, hey, everyone, fill
Speaker 1: me on what I missed. We were just talking about love, heartbreak, relationships, time, time.
Speaker 1: It's all about time, really, Dean? How are you? What
Speaker 1: was going on? Why are we late? I'm sorry for
Speaker 1: being late, you guys. It's okay. What happened out at
Speaker 1: the fan He's going to be living in You know
Speaker 1: that traffic in l A just sometimes sneaks up on? No, no, no,
Speaker 1: I need you to give me a thirty second story
Speaker 1: as to why you're late. I needed to be completely false,
Speaker 1: but give me a good one. Oh man, No, come
Speaker 1: on that thirty seconds Dean. What walk of shame were
Speaker 1: you doing? I'm exhausted today, you guys. Again, I apologize
Speaker 1: for being late. I just spent the weekend with Peter
Speaker 1: and Alex and I just exhausted. How is dear Peter
Speaker 1: and Alex? You know they're doing really well. Um, Peter
Speaker 1: Who and Alex Who? Peter Kraft and Alex bordakov A.
Speaker 1: Right there we go, two gentlemen for my season. Is
Speaker 1: Alex doing Paradise? He is Australian Paradise, the same one
Speaker 1: you saw, so I saw because you tagged him and
Speaker 1: I looked at his Instagram and I saw him post
Speaker 1: a picture it said Bachelor in Paradise and I thought,
Speaker 1: to my they haven't enough the cast yet. So for
Speaker 1: the listeners out there, there's an Australian Bachelor in Paradise
Speaker 1: and Alex along with a couple of other Americans are
Speaker 1: going to be down there. This because Jared did that
Speaker 1: last year. Yeah, I did it last year before Ashley
Speaker 1: and I got together, when she did win two games.
Speaker 1: I did Bachelor and Paradise Australia the same thing, um.
Speaker 1: And it's funny because he filled me in on a
Speaker 1: lot of what happened down there, and obviously being on
Speaker 1: a beach and Fiji for a month sounds amazing. Um,
Speaker 1: but it just sounds a little bit different than the
Speaker 1: experience that we had with the US Bachelor Paradis and
Speaker 1: you've done both, I guess, so you would know. Well,
Speaker 1: it was different. I heard so some cast members that
Speaker 1: were on my season of Bachelor in Paradise Australia went
Speaker 1: back and I talked to him a little bit about it,
Speaker 1: and they said that they were a little bit more
Speaker 1: strict this time around, because in the season I went to,
Speaker 1: it was a free for all pretty much. It was
Speaker 1: crazy because on the American version of Paradise, you were
Speaker 1: on camera legitimately cameras. Dean, you can attest this in
Speaker 1: your rooms, they wake you up at eight o'clock in
Speaker 1: the morning with a camera in your face. You go
Speaker 1: to bed at two o'clock in the morning, there's still
Speaker 1: a camera there. With Bachelor in Paradise Australia. Literally, remember,
Speaker 1: I'd wake up at like end in the morning. That's
Speaker 1: what's That's what he was telling me. Pay on down
Speaker 1: to the breakfast place. There were no cameras, nobody's miked up,
Speaker 1: but everybody's hanging out talking about what happened the night previous.
Speaker 1: And then I remember being mind boggled because we're talking
Speaker 1: about serious things that happened at rose ceremonies and cocktail parties,
Speaker 1: none of it being captured, and then like one o'clock
Speaker 1: in the afternoon, they'd be like, all right, guys, let's
Speaker 1: get miked up, and then they would put us in
Speaker 1: these chats and like, Okay, let's talk about what happened
Speaker 1: last night, like what we already did, but I guess
Speaker 1: we'll talk about it again. So it just didn't feel
Speaker 1: as authentic because it wasn't the first time we were
Speaker 1: talking about it. So that's exactly what he said to
Speaker 1: He was like, Yeah, I wouldn't, you know, be for
Speaker 1: not forced, but I wouldn't be required to do anything
Speaker 1: on camera until about noon every single day. And I'm like,
Speaker 1: that's a night and day difference to Bachelor in Paradise US,
Speaker 1: because it's like you said, you're up at eight am, Um,
Speaker 1: you're Mike basically the second your foot step touches the
Speaker 1: ground after leaving your bed. Um. But yeah, I mean
Speaker 1: it sounds like it's fun fies. You obviously would be
Speaker 1: a blast. Um. Do you know who else went down there?
Speaker 1: Are you allowed to say? No? I don't know. I
Speaker 1: don't know. Am I allowed to say I don't know.
Speaker 1: Let's not even go down that road. Is it somebody
Speaker 1: that's been on Paradise, the American version that the two Americans,
Speaker 1: all three Americans including Alex, that go down there? Um?
Speaker 1: Did you watch your Australian Paradise season when it was airing?
Speaker 1: H No, I did not, because it was I was
Speaker 1: with Ashley at this point. So we filmed in November
Speaker 1: of seen and then it didn't start airing I think
Speaker 1: until like April or met something like that, because it
Speaker 1: was so different because with Winter Games with you guys,
Speaker 1: you guys filmed in December to air February. February a
Speaker 1: month and a half later, and so mine was a
Speaker 1: little bit weirder, and also I couldn't really I watched
Speaker 1: some clips of it, A lot of it was on YouTube. Um,
Speaker 1: but obviously I was with Ashley at the time, so
Speaker 1: I didn't really want to revisit a time I was in.
Speaker 1: But you didn't kiss anyone or anything like that. Now,
Speaker 1: I was there for two weeks, went through five rows ceremonies,
Speaker 1: did not kiss a girl, did not kiss anybody, and
Speaker 1: from what I understand through Alex's uh explanation of it all,
Speaker 1: it seems like the Americans are brought in kind of
Speaker 1: as novelties, right, Like the Australian UM viewers don't really
Speaker 1: care about the American cast members. They care about obviously
Speaker 1: the Australians that they've seen on Bachelor, Bachelorette UM or
Speaker 1: the I guess the newcomers that they bring in as well,
Speaker 1: and then the Americans are they're just basically not like
Speaker 1: to be made fun of, but just essentially as a novelty, like, oh,
Speaker 1: look at this American we brought into Like yeah, well
Speaker 1: they were going to bring in Australian contestants to the
Speaker 1: American version on your season as novelties as well as
Speaker 1: just like outsiders. But then obviously you're kind of stu.
Speaker 1: You know that whole thing went down with do you
Speaker 1: know Courtney Dover was supposed to come down to Bachelor
Speaker 1: Paradise on my season. Yeah, he was at the hotel.
Speaker 1: He's at the hotel. Never went down, and then that's
Speaker 1: the Bachelorette Bachelor in Paradise, so he never came down
Speaker 1: the steps because obviously there's that big um shut down
Speaker 1: for like a week and a half, and then that's why,
Speaker 1: well that's not why, but then they were like, Okay,
Speaker 1: we're gonna have you come on Winter Games No Courtney, Yes, yes, Yeah.
Speaker 1: It was funny because there was a girl that was
Speaker 1: on my season in Paradise, Kira, who's supposed to go
Speaker 1: on the American version in the hotel same thing is
Speaker 1: called anti the villain or something. She was. She's fan dude,
Speaker 1: She's awesome. She's just one of those people you know,
Speaker 1: like it's hard to compare in contras. But like Ashley
Speaker 1: was kind of like the villain of her season, not
Speaker 1: really but just like dramatic. Nobody liked her, and then
Speaker 1: not nobody liked her, but and then she went on
Speaker 1: Paradise and everybody fell in love with her. Right the
Speaker 1: same thing with Kira, where like on her season she
Speaker 1: causes drama, she's a little like scandalous, and then you
Speaker 1: know they end up loving her because she's just real
Speaker 1: and authentic and crazy and it's fantastic. So why don't
Speaker 1: you Kira on bechelor in Paradise Australia because it was
Speaker 1: there was not that romantic chemistry, but I loved being
Speaker 1: around her best. Romantic chemistry obviously is very important, very important,
Speaker 1: as we all three of us know too well. But
Speaker 1: before we move on, my name is h ov h
Speaker 1: to the ov that that that Tom Brady runs out
Speaker 1: to that song. Just keep just keep talking. Sorry, I
Speaker 1: keep doing your thing anyway. You guys heard about joy Bird,
Speaker 1: have you? Guys? Of course we've heard. Well I've heard
Speaker 1: about joy Bird. Well I've are you redecorating your home? Um? Yeah,
Speaker 1: actually just ordered a couch from them? Really what kind
Speaker 1: of couch? I can't remember the exact name and model
Speaker 1: of it, but it's like this, Heather Gray beautiful couch.
Speaker 1: I want a great couch so badly. Tanner and I
Speaker 1: was just over Tanner in Jade's house and they got
Speaker 1: a brand new couch. I can't remember if I got
Speaker 1: it from joy Burn or not, but it is the
Speaker 1: most comfortable thing. And honestly, the problem is our couch
Speaker 1: at the condo right now smells like because we got
Speaker 1: a puppy. She peas everywhere. And here's the problem. She
Speaker 1: peas everywhere, and now our other dog, Gurgey, who's five,
Speaker 1: smells her peep want to mark his territory exactly. So now, dude,
Speaker 1: it's horrible. We well, how long have you had this
Speaker 1: new dog for you? I feel like you should have
Speaker 1: your potty train by now. She is potty trained, but
Speaker 1: apparently so she is about nine months. We got her
Speaker 1: back in September. She's potty trained, but she started reverting back,
Speaker 1: going back, peeing inside, barking at people, and we were
Speaker 1: looking it up and dogs can have adolescent years, so
Speaker 1: she's kind of like a teenager, right, she's like lashing back.
Speaker 1: She's lashing back a little bit. So it's causing a
Speaker 1: little bit of an issue with the couch, which is
Speaker 1: why we need a new couch. But the great thing
Speaker 1: is now we have joy Bird, and we all know
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Speaker 1: should never settle when it comes to your home furnishings
Speaker 1: and that you should always have the freedom to be
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Speaker 1: I think of you, and I don't know why, really,
Speaker 1: why do you think of me? I have zero idea,
Speaker 1: but I think of like dr or something or like
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Speaker 1: like a snack or something boldly original. Yeah, I think
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Speaker 1: mean for like the rest of our lives, the rest
Speaker 1: of our lives, we can be on our deathbed and
Speaker 1: return our joy Bird defective furniture? Knock on wood that
Speaker 1: we make it that far. If I'm on my deathbed
Speaker 1: when I'm a hundred and forty years old, I want
Speaker 1: to return my joy Bred couch just has to be
Speaker 1: a reason for it has to be like a manufactured defector.
Speaker 1: So even if it's the best couch of all time
Speaker 1: and I'm a hundred forty years old, I can't return it. Well,
Speaker 1: if there's a defect, like say, maybe the leg breaks,
Speaker 1: but Joybird is so good, the leg's not going to break.
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Speaker 1: going to, you can keep it, and if you don't
Speaker 1: like it, which trust me, you're gonna love it, you
Speaker 1: can return it. As I was just talking, dogs can
Speaker 1: ruin furniture and rugs. Ashley and I know all too
Speaker 1: much about that, so we're trying to find new, affordable
Speaker 1: and timeless furniture for the condo ray now and hopefully
Speaker 1: for our future family home. And we're trying to make
Speaker 1: our apartment a little bit more adult like and less
Speaker 1: bachelor bad esk, you know. So we just ordered the
Speaker 1: Soto chair and Taylor felt gray and maplewood. I'm pretty
Speaker 1: stoked to get that in the mail. So you guys
Speaker 1: can see how joybird is revolution denizing online furniture shopping.
Speaker 1: You can create the furniture that brings you joy today
Speaker 1: at joy bird dot com slash dan. You got to
Speaker 1: joybird dot com slash dan that's d E a N
Speaker 1: and receive an exclusive offer for off for your first
Speaker 1: order by using code dan. Where are you on that off?
Speaker 1: That's big for for nitures, expensive off that could be
Speaker 1: in the hundreds at all. It's a big chunk. Plus
Speaker 1: a year warranty, lifetime warranty for defects. Hey, when you
Speaker 1: get that, when you get that photo chair and Taylor
Speaker 1: felt gray in maplewood, Um, are you gonna breaking in? Well,
Speaker 1: that's a personal question. Next and next and on that note,
Speaker 1: moving right along, So literally didn't come up with questions.
Speaker 1: I'm on my on the internet right now googling questions,
Speaker 1: But I kind of like that. So here's some fun
Speaker 1: questions for Dean and Vanessa so you can learn a
Speaker 1: little bit more about the host and their pet peeves. Ready,
Speaker 1: are you, as Dean, what's your silliest recent fashion trend?
Speaker 1: What do you think the silliest fashion trend is recently
Speaker 1: that I've you've encompassed, You've seen, you've worn. I don't
Speaker 1: leave the house that a beanie on? Yeah, what's up
Speaker 1: at that? And it's eighty five degrees in Los Angeles?
Speaker 1: Is it because your hair? So Dean's hair is Dean
Speaker 1: You're growing up, growing out the flow? Yeah, I love flow, dude.
Speaker 1: I'll never forget this is God. People are gonna think
Speaker 1: I'm so pathetic. Well, Tom Brady grew out his hair
Speaker 1: and tails and tent and literally when you put his
Speaker 1: helmon on, blow was like his hair was out of
Speaker 1: the helmet. Do you remember that? As he was the
Speaker 1: unanimous m v P. It was the most badass move.
Speaker 1: Like he's on his on the sideline fixing his hair
Speaker 1: and then he goes on the field and throws for
Speaker 1: four touchings and it's like this man, this man, he's
Speaker 1: not a man. He's superman. I feel like dared. I
Speaker 1: feel like he would be your How do you say
Speaker 1: the name Blanche captain Blanche when you're allowed to cha
Speaker 1: on your significant other? No? First, no? Actually, and I
Speaker 1: don't have a hall pass, No hall pass? A pass?
Speaker 1: Was Tom Brady? That what you and Tom Brady could
Speaker 1: be as brothers? That might be worth something exploring? All right?
Speaker 1: To answer that question, it's a fantastic opportunity. But I
Speaker 1: would not want that. I would just want to I
Speaker 1: would want to go on a double date Tom Giselle
Speaker 1: Ashley me. You know what I mean. That's not too
Speaker 1: much asked. What if you guys pulled the switchero actually
Speaker 1: gets Tom for the night and you get Why do
Speaker 1: you have to ask me these questions on air? Because
Speaker 1: I think we all know the answer to that. He's
Speaker 1: the one person for me. I love her, she's out
Speaker 1: bunching her. Yeah. But if you guys, all right, what's
Speaker 1: the ciliest trend you've seen in Vanessa? Are you've worn?
Speaker 1: What was the weirdest thing you've ever won throughout your
Speaker 1: entire life? Weirdest? I can't think of weirdest, but the
Speaker 1: one thing now I just feel like I've become really lazy,
Speaker 1: and maybe that has part to do with the fact
Speaker 1: that I'm in a relationship. But I'm always in leggings,
Speaker 1: leggings or like, I don't wear do you order int anymore? Either?
Speaker 1: I think Dean has inspired me, That's what's up. I
Speaker 1: love that. Well you don't wear Do you wear the
Speaker 1: order when you work out? No? I haven't worked out
Speaker 1: in a while. So well, First of all, I don't
Speaker 1: think you're I don't think your man is too upset
Speaker 1: about you wearing leggings around the house. Dude, there now.
Speaker 1: But you know, when you just want to feel good
Speaker 1: as a girl like you, just you want to be
Speaker 1: dulled up a little bit. I have to get back
Speaker 1: into that phase of feeling good and looking half decent.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, you're right now on this TV scream
Speaker 1: and I say, you have never looked better in my opinion.
Speaker 1: Oh stop it. That's Jared's part. He's the one that
Speaker 1: compliments me. You're the one that makes fun of me.
Speaker 1: I think it just might be your relationship glow. Yeah,
Speaker 1: let maybe the nice guy. Okay, well, sorry for giving
Speaker 1: you a compliment. Um the most one and one of
Speaker 1: the most embarrassing things I remember wearing was in high school.
Speaker 1: I used to be the two polo guy at both
Speaker 1: code dude. It was horrible. I had no idea what
Speaker 1: both of both both of the college people actually did that.
Speaker 1: I was trying to be cool East Coast five. I
Speaker 1: guess guys I dated this. I dated this guy who
Speaker 1: would pop his collar. But then I realized he was
Speaker 1: wearing foundation. Well how old was this guy? Uh? He
Speaker 1: must have been nineteen. That seems a little young. You know.
Speaker 1: It's another thing that I didn't do. But I've seen
Speaker 1: other guys at bars, and I just saw this past weekend,
Speaker 1: guys who are at it like a beach bar, and
Speaker 1: they're wearing a button down shirt but it's not buttoned.
Speaker 1: It's just opened with nothing underneath it. That's I like that,
Speaker 1: that's a move. I like that you can get away
Speaker 1: with it. But the T shirt underneath has to be baggy.
Speaker 1: It can be like super tight. No no, no, no,
Speaker 1: no T shirt chest hair flowing out. I like, I'm
Speaker 1: like like a white tea with like a blue button
Speaker 1: down open. But here's the thing at the bar, if
Speaker 1: you're just walking around with a button down shirt that's
Speaker 1: open and you're letting your chest flow. Just like either
Speaker 1: one take the shirt off, go shirtless, or two button
Speaker 1: the shirt. I think you're not pet peeve weird. It
Speaker 1: really depends on location. You can do that on like
Speaker 1: you said it on like a beach bar. Yeah, this
Speaker 1: was a place was like a like a restaurant slash
Speaker 1: bar that was on the water. Just sig. I don't know,
Speaker 1: but even still like, bro, come on, come on, if
Speaker 1: it's a lenin, maybe you can get away with it. Um.
Speaker 1: In high school, I also wore tall teas. You guys
Speaker 1: know what tall teams. Oh my god. Yeah, every T
Speaker 1: shirt that I owned in my closet went from my
Speaker 1: shoulders all the way down to my knees. Basically it
Speaker 1: was just an extra, extra, extra, extra, extra extra large
Speaker 1: T shirt. Um. I had like thirty of them. And
Speaker 1: I also wore uh um fifty what are those hats
Speaker 1: that the fitted hats? Yeah, So basically it was like
Speaker 1: we all thought that we were gangsters bringing a picture
Speaker 1: up right now. And that was what Dean looked like
Speaker 1: in high school and in hindsight, not my best look.
Speaker 1: I also I used to wear basketball jerseys to school
Speaker 1: all the time, and my favorite was my Paul Pierce
Speaker 1: Boston Celtics one, but I used to tuck it in.
Speaker 1: I thought. I never thought anything of it. My dad
Speaker 1: just taught me to like talk in my shirts at
Speaker 1: a young age, and so I would talk in my
Speaker 1: basketball jersey. I'll never forget. That's cool one of them.
Speaker 1: So I'm walking through school like beating you up, yeah
Speaker 1: with your long time um. So I remember I was
Speaker 1: wearing a white shirt underneath and my basketball jersey over
Speaker 1: the top, and I had it tucked in into my jeans.
Speaker 1: And this was like before home room, and all of
Speaker 1: a sudden, one of the coolest kids in school. I'll
Speaker 1: never forget. He started walking up to me and he
Speaker 1: started like on talking my shirt and he was being
Speaker 1: he was like bro down to that. He's like, don't
Speaker 1: do that. Don't ever talk to hi. He's like football jerseys, Yeah,
Speaker 1: you can talk in basketball Jersey's no, And for some
Speaker 1: reason that just stayed in my mind as one of
Speaker 1: the most impressionable things that ever happened to me in
Speaker 1: high school. Like, okay, all right, don't talk in the
Speaker 1: basketball jersey. I was. I was rocking your Celtics on.
Speaker 1: I saw that broke. It was a kg number five,
Speaker 1: number five, a great one. Anything is possible. I feel
Speaker 1: like you guys should start a side podcast on sports.
Speaker 1: I don't think I know enough about sports. I think
Speaker 1: my sports knowledge is steadily declined as I've aged. How
Speaker 1: you feeling about Joe Flacco? Baby, I feel really about him. Honestly,
Speaker 1: nobody's gonna listen to this podcast after that one do Flacco?
Speaker 1: He is a new quarterback for the dever Broncos used. Um,
Speaker 1: which technology from science fiction? Do you wish existed? Time travel? Yes?
Speaker 1: What is it? Back to the future of course, all
Speaker 1: three of them? Really? Um? What technology? Yeah? I mean
Speaker 1: time travel is just such an easy one. Maybe like
Speaker 1: a shrink ray or a shrink ray would be pretty cool,
Speaker 1: be able to like go microscopic. I used to fantasize
Speaker 1: about that after I watch um Um Honey, I shrunk
Speaker 1: the kids Like I always imagine myself being just like
Speaker 1: the size of an aunt and running around and having
Speaker 1: a whole new perspective on life. All right, what's the
Speaker 1: dumbest chorus from a recent song? The dumbest chorus from
Speaker 1: a recent song. I gotta be honest, this is gonna
Speaker 1: be an unpopular opinion. I think especially to our and
Speaker 1: it's thank you, thank you. That's a song that's my anthem.
Speaker 1: Why do you like that song so much? Why do
Speaker 1: I love that song? Because we were just talking about
Speaker 1: how it's so much easier to hate someone that you dated.
Speaker 1: So it's like, that's your like polite way of saying
Speaker 1: I hate you by I know, but it's kind of pretentious,
Speaker 1: isn't it? Like thank you? Next and it's like, I
Speaker 1: will say, the music video incredible. I'm a big Mariana fan.
Speaker 1: I like Ariana. I'm just not a big fan of
Speaker 1: that particular song. I like her music. I just think
Speaker 1: she's really pretty. She's beautiful. How do you feel about
Speaker 1: Pete Davidson and Kate beckt Cell? That's an odd pairing. Huh?
Speaker 1: Beck and Sell was the girl from Titanic? Right? No,
Speaker 1: Kate beck Cells from Underworld? Right? Yeah, okay, next question,
Speaker 1: she's well, she's also the wife, she's Adam Sandler's wife.
Speaker 1: And click, that's a big, real friend. That's a big
Speaker 1: point of reference for a lot of people. I would agree,
Speaker 1: that's the first one came to Academy a word wing Click,
Speaker 1: what did it win? Best makeup? All? Right? That's fair
Speaker 1: I guess Yeah, the makeup job was pretty good towards
Speaker 1: the end of the movie. Uh, what job would you
Speaker 1: be absolutely terrible at? Modeling? Podcast? Anything that needs to
Speaker 1: he needs to be on time for one time the USA?
Speaker 1: What do you think you would suck at as a job?
Speaker 1: Suck at modeling? I don't like to I don't like
Speaker 1: being photographed. It gives me so much anxiety. I like
Speaker 1: taking pictures of people, you know, No, I have to
Speaker 1: for Instagram, you know, to like get that engagement. It's like, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's like our world right now. I know. I don't
Speaker 1: like it. That's why I start a YouTube channel because
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm better with video than I am
Speaker 1: with pictures. I don't think I suck at a job.
Speaker 1: I'm really good at everything. Um, what is what's your
Speaker 1: perfect Saturday? Look like? Great question? Staying home in pajamas,
Speaker 1: not showering, not brushing my teeth, brush your teeth, sat Yeah,
Speaker 1: like not like completely allowing yourself to be lazy. Huh
Speaker 1: and ignoring hygiene is different than being Yeah, I know
Speaker 1: you're talking about that. You just gained a lot of
Speaker 1: points in my book with that answer from the guys
Speaker 1: about to live in a van but just the beach
Speaker 1: day with the boys. Each there the boys. Yeah, that'd
Speaker 1: be a good one. Maybe maybe wear my my button
Speaker 1: down shirt to a bar, unbuttoned it all the way
Speaker 1: and just drink some Coronas corona with a lime. I'll
Speaker 1: take a Corona rita please, part in Vanessa. Do you
Speaker 1: have chest hair? I've got a couple. Let me say,
Speaker 1: let's say pulled down. Oh yeah, there we go. There's
Speaker 1: a couple of lanning. You know, why don't we bring
Speaker 1: this conversation back to dating? So bring it back. Let's
Speaker 1: let's talk about red flags when you're first dating someone.
Speaker 1: What are some red flags? What are some red flags
Speaker 1: that you consider a big like no, no, and that's
Speaker 1: like your time to say thank you next. It's such
Speaker 1: a vague answer. If you start seeing holes in the
Speaker 1: stories that people tell you, and then you maybe you
Speaker 1: don't even want to have to call them on it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but what kind of story? It's like, like people love
Speaker 1: to embellish. People love to make themselves sound cooler and
Speaker 1: better than they really are. And the second that I
Speaker 1: like start to catch people doing that, I'm like, this
Speaker 1: is just I'm out. So you don't like a try hard.
Speaker 1: Somebody who's really even trying to impress you something exactly,
Speaker 1: someone that like thinks that they need to make something
Speaker 1: up or embellish or exaggerated truth because they think that
Speaker 1: will make them look better. But I feel like that's
Speaker 1: at the beginning of every date that you go on,
Speaker 1: like the first couple of dates. They're always going to
Speaker 1: try to make themselves sound or look cooler. I get it,
Speaker 1: but I absolutely hate when people do that. You guys
Speaker 1: always give me every being so self deprecating, and that's
Speaker 1: one of the reasons I do that is because I
Speaker 1: I want to avoid that at all costs. I agree,
Speaker 1: I like being self I like being self deprecating as
Speaker 1: well because of that. But to be fair to any
Speaker 1: of these people who are doing it to you, you
Speaker 1: are seen as kind of like a little bit of
Speaker 1: a sex symbol from The Bachelor, So maybe they're just
Speaker 1: trying to get on your level, you know what I mean? True, right,
Speaker 1: I've got my life together. If you don't want, if
Speaker 1: you did, the amount of women that hit me up
Speaker 1: to try to like slide into your d M s
Speaker 1: or try to get your number or your attention is wild.
Speaker 1: And whenever I post a story with you or something.
Speaker 1: All my friends text me and say, hey, what's what's
Speaker 1: Vanessa's deal? Hey, Dean before the four friends that you
Speaker 1: keep mentioning, it's literally my entire Instagram that goes crazy
Speaker 1: every time I post a picture of you. Well, yeah,
Speaker 1: because it just is. It's the way that it works.
Speaker 1: You know, you have a lot of female followers. I
Speaker 1: have a lot of female followers. But then my close
Speaker 1: friends are always asking me who's that girl? It's jes girls,
Speaker 1: it's Vaness. I love that feel so much. What if Okay,
Speaker 1: what if the guy I'm a really okay? Do you?
Speaker 1: I know, Jared you said that you and actually have
Speaker 1: each other's passwords for your computer and your phone. Um,
Speaker 1: what if, like you start dating a guy and I'm
Speaker 1: someone who's really curious, I'd want to know, like, oh,
Speaker 1: what's he texting or who is he texting? And if
Speaker 1: he starts to like suddenly shift his phone away from you,
Speaker 1: that's like, dude, what are you hiding? Certainly, yeah, we've
Speaker 1: talked about this for because like even like when guys
Speaker 1: bring their phones into the bathroom, apparently that could be
Speaker 1: a red flight, even though I bring mine. Because I
Speaker 1: listened to the music while I'm in the shower. Keep
Speaker 1: the door open. Keep that door open. That's my policy
Speaker 1: with my boyfriend, like keeping that door. What about when
Speaker 1: I go to number two before showering, solely so I
Speaker 1: could get like if you know, like there you get
Speaker 1: the steam. You want to get the smells so they
Speaker 1: don't hear you. The noise. Thing is the big thing
Speaker 1: for me is I'll literally go, I'll take a shower
Speaker 1: sometimes just so I can go number two and get
Speaker 1: away with it. If there's no fans in your shower,
Speaker 1: No shower on are so wasteful, just just courtesy flush
Speaker 1: as you're going, no, no, because you don't even tell
Speaker 1: them that you're going to the bathroom. You say, hey,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna take a shower real quick, alleviate yourself up
Speaker 1: your number two, and then you jump in the shower
Speaker 1: and pretend like you never even did it. No, you
Speaker 1: leave the door. And this happened to me one time.
Speaker 1: The door was unlocked and then shower and all of
Speaker 1: a sudden, I'm like, okay, here's my private time. And
Speaker 1: I sit down and all of a sudden it was
Speaker 1: like like the doors are opening, and I frantically get
Speaker 1: up and shut the door, and she's like, what are
Speaker 1: you doing? It's me and I'm like, I'm not in
Speaker 1: the shower right now, and it's like, God, I have
Speaker 1: to lock the door because I do you live with
Speaker 1: your boyfriend? I can't remember. No, uh no, I don't
Speaker 1: live with my boyfriend. But where I'm like, I don't care.
Speaker 1: I don't have any secrets. I don't like to get
Speaker 1: about the whole privhecy thing. But I'm someone who's so open,
Speaker 1: like I'm open and about a lot of things. So
Speaker 1: I'm like, Okay, I'm going to take a ship. What's
Speaker 1: the big deal. I don't know. I don't know. If
Speaker 1: Ashley said, hey, I'm gonna go take a ship, I'd
Speaker 1: be like maybe I'll use that terminology. But I'm like,
Speaker 1: I'm going to the bathroom, like I'll be long wink wink. No. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm like, all r, I gotta go the bathroom. But
Speaker 1: I also don't want the door open. I don't want
Speaker 1: I don't want anybody, whether it be actually my my
Speaker 1: my parents, my friends, Like, I just want that time alone,
Speaker 1: you know, it's just such that's quality. I don't want.
Speaker 1: I don't want to smell and here it myself, so
Speaker 1: I don't want anyone else he's gonna go to a
Speaker 1: public bathroom. I literally put my headphones in because I
Speaker 1: can't hear other dudes doing their business because then I
Speaker 1: just need to like zone out. Yeah, whatever, I'm weird.
Speaker 1: I don't know. No, I think I'm weird because every
Speaker 1: time I talk about it, people look at me like,
Speaker 1: why would you ever want to talk about your business
Speaker 1: in the bathroom, and like why wouldn't I. I used
Speaker 1: to have to take off my shirt every single time
Speaker 1: I went number two. Yeah you said that before. Yeah,
Speaker 1: up until I was like years old, every single time,
Speaker 1: whether I was in a public restroom, personal bathroom, my
Speaker 1: shirt comes off and I hang it up. I don't know.
Speaker 1: I just think you get hot. I felt like the
Speaker 1: smell would come up and get stuck in the shirt
Speaker 1: or something. It was just like this weird thing that
Speaker 1: I had just the shirt. Dude, I'm going to give
Speaker 1: you some poperie. They send me a box ball pants
Speaker 1: always come down, they have to. I had a due
Speaker 1: that was shrip totally naked to number two. If I
Speaker 1: ever saw Dean walk out of a public stall with
Speaker 1: his sure at all, I would take this shirt off
Speaker 1: in the stall and hanging up on the hook on
Speaker 1: the wall the door. Maybe do you do you put
Speaker 1: the shirt back on before you walk out? Yes? Absolutely,
Speaker 1: And I don't know if you were like. So, next up,
Speaker 1: we have a guest coming into studio, Jared you wanna
Speaker 1: do you want to talk about who we have coming in? Next?
Speaker 1: We have Kimry Lewis and she stars on the ABC
Speaker 1: Hits show Single Parents, which airs Wednesdays at nine thirty.
Speaker 1: And it's funny because Chris Harrison just made I guess
Speaker 1: appearance on that. Do you guys see that? Um, we
Speaker 1: did see that, and we're also gonna love to talk
Speaker 1: to Kimry about that a little bit. But before we
Speaker 1: do that, I want to talk to you guys about
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Speaker 1: ideal firmness on each side. So it's just not so,
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Speaker 1: like as even as an individual, my preference for firmness
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Speaker 1: your laptop of bed too? Yes and no, so you
Speaker 1: pretty much work from bed as well? Well? Because I do. Guys,
Speaker 1: I'm doing this podcast from my bed. Yeah. See, we're
Speaker 1: always working in bed. We fold laundry on our bed,
Speaker 1: We book our nucks, travel on our bed. Guys, We'll
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Speaker 1: number is forty. So it's not too soft, it's not
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Speaker 1: I'm saying. What is Ashley's number? I read about forty. Yeah,
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Speaker 1: just spectacular myself. And one more thing I want to
Speaker 1: talk to you guys, Well, we all want to talk
Speaker 1: to you guys about Vanessa. Do you want to tell
Speaker 1: our listeners about robt? Yeah? So what you guys know
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Speaker 1: Not yet, but I want to. I really want to be.
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Speaker 1: I've been using robin Hood a little bit. Yeah, it's
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Speaker 1: like Apple, Ford or Sprint. Sign up at DAN one
Speaker 1: d e A N number one dot robin Hood dot
Speaker 1: com and you can get a free stock. Apples trading
Speaker 1: at one eighties seven dollars. Smith Apples are trading at
Speaker 1: one dollar. Apple the oh, okay Apple, like your phone,
Speaker 1: your computer, all that good stuff. That Apple. You've heard
Speaker 1: of that Apple before? Right? Um. I met a guy
Speaker 1: on a flight last year when I was flying from
Speaker 1: like Bombay to jode Poor with my friends when I
Speaker 1: was in India, and he was like he was he
Speaker 1: was an Indian man who lived in San Francisco who
Speaker 1: was just maybe one of the smartest people I've ever met,
Speaker 1: Like just you could just tell by having a conversation
Speaker 1: with him. And he was like, you have to invest
Speaker 1: in the stock. Uh. Trump justin posed tariffs on this
Speaker 1: metal and their stock took a hit, but it's actually
Speaker 1: not really that big of a deal and it's gonna rebound.
Speaker 1: And I was like, Okay, I'm gonna invest in the stock.
Speaker 1: Invested not like a whole lot of money, but like
Speaker 1: I bought a little bit of it and it's done nothing.
Speaker 1: But DOWND could have been well that's what I'm saying
Speaker 1: I was like, I just trust this guy's judgment. I
Speaker 1: don't know what it is. It's only in two hours.
Speaker 1: But anyways, well, that's why you should use Robin. It's
Speaker 1: a little bit smarter. Yes, that's what Robin has great
Speaker 1: about because it does give you the research and the
Speaker 1: data that it's a great name to take from the rich,
Speaker 1: give to the poor. Yeah, take from everyone else and
Speaker 1: give it all to me. Before we jump into having
Speaker 1: Kimrie in studio, let's set, uh, have a couple of emails.
Speaker 1: What do you guys say? Yeah, let's do some email.
Speaker 1: I feel ghostly. So we have three emails, two of them, um,
Speaker 1: or maybe all of them are more Yeah, they're all.
Speaker 1: I think it's probably because all of the codes that
Speaker 1: we have for all of our sponsors used the word Dean,
Speaker 1: and so we just hear the name Dean more often
Speaker 1: than people are just like, let me ask you. No,
Speaker 1: that's fine, they love you more. Um. From the ladies
Speaker 1: of Maple Street. I'm just gonna read a couple. This
Speaker 1: one's short and easy. It's titled Blimps and it says,
Speaker 1: dear Dean, have you conquered your fear of blimps yet?
Speaker 1: And thank you ladies of Maple Street. But I want
Speaker 1: you to know I never had a fear of blimps.
Speaker 1: It was a fear. It was a fear of heights. Um.
Speaker 1: And I was at a NASCAR race yesterday with my
Speaker 1: friends and there's a good year blimp was circling the
Speaker 1: entire time, and I was like, I'm one of very
Speaker 1: few people that have ever flown one of those. Um.
Speaker 1: So yes, I guess I've conquered my fear of blimps,
Speaker 1: even though I never had one. Fear of heights is
Speaker 1: also something that is you know, but you've conquered that obviously. Yeah,
Speaker 1: skydiving seems to do the trick. Well, Okay, here's the
Speaker 1: thing with the whole fear of heights thing is I'm
Speaker 1: like super sarcastic, and I think that I was just
Speaker 1: joking around with them a little bit. I was like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, I'm terrified of heights, and I am like,
Speaker 1: I have had stints of fear of flying. But I
Speaker 1: think they just built it up to be a little
Speaker 1: bit more than it really was. Um. All about conquering
Speaker 1: fears and all that kind of stuff. So yes, I
Speaker 1: have conquered that. UM. But ASA you can answer this
Speaker 1: one for us from Maxwell. So, Maxwell says he has
Speaker 1: trust issues in therapy, and we know I'll know that
Speaker 1: you're an advocate for therapy. So he says, my parents
Speaker 1: hate me and repeatedly tell me. So it's gotten to
Speaker 1: the point where we no longer talk to each other
Speaker 1: at all. I am a twenty year old to have
Speaker 1: started taking dating seriously because I need love in my life.
Speaker 1: But every time I meet a new girl, one of
Speaker 1: three things happens thanks to my family issues. I struggled
Speaker 1: to trust them, I trust them too much, too fast,
Speaker 1: or I just keep them as far away from my
Speaker 1: heart is possible. How do you handle traumatic family problems
Speaker 1: in your dating life. I've tried therapy, like all of
Speaker 1: us who up into therapy, but it hasn't worked for me.
Speaker 1: So what's your advice from Maxwell? Well, starting to date
Speaker 1: at twenty years old is that's you know, you're you're
Speaker 1: just starting to learn a little bit more about yourself,
Speaker 1: and when you're introducing someone else into your life romantically,
Speaker 1: it will bring up some form of issues that you
Speaker 1: may have. And like you said, Maxwell, you have trust issues.
Speaker 1: And I'm thirty one years old and I just found
Speaker 1: out that I have major trust issues, So I totally
Speaker 1: get it UM, and my therapy is focusing around why
Speaker 1: that why those trust issues exist, and I did get
Speaker 1: to the bottom of it, and I still have trouble
Speaker 1: with UM. I guess allowing myself to trust other people.
Speaker 1: But once you start noticing signs of UM, like let's say,
Speaker 1: with me, would be trusting that someone is seeing the truth.
Speaker 1: And I'm going to have to get to the autumn
Speaker 1: if whether they're lying to me or not allowing yourself
Speaker 1: to say okay. This is an example that an exercise
Speaker 1: that I do with my therapist is like a scientific
Speaker 1: fact and then like a Vanessa fact. So Vanessa fact
Speaker 1: is he's always lying to me, and I'll write that
Speaker 1: down on a piece of paper, and then a scientific
Speaker 1: fact next to it is has he ever lied to me?
Speaker 1: And I'll say, well, no, he's never lied to my
Speaker 1: face or I've never caught him at aal eye, So
Speaker 1: this person has never lied to me. And you change,
Speaker 1: you change your your thoughts of UM that you may
Speaker 1: have into an actual scientific fact. And that's helped me
Speaker 1: realize like my rights from wrongs and when my trust
Speaker 1: issues appear, and when I could try to change those
Speaker 1: Um sentences are phrases that I have in my friend
Speaker 1: about in my head about a specific person, and how
Speaker 1: can I make them more realistic. So that's something that's
Speaker 1: helped me. That's not about way to do it, to
Speaker 1: play Devil's advocate here, I will say. And it's funny
Speaker 1: because I was thinking about this before you started um
Speaker 1: explaining that, and it's a great point. I think that's
Speaker 1: actually a really good thing to practice. It never discount
Speaker 1: a gut feeling. I feel like sometimes like gut feelings
Speaker 1: can kind of like transcend information that you have in
Speaker 1: front of you for whatever reason. I don't know exactly
Speaker 1: what it is. But if you but I'm gonna stop you.
Speaker 1: If you have trust issues, it's really hard to decipher
Speaker 1: between your gut and what your trust issues are telling you.
Speaker 1: I agree with that. I don't know. I just like
Speaker 1: I've had gut feelings in the past and I chose
Speaker 1: chose to ignore them um and then looking back, I mean,
Speaker 1: I shouldn't have ignored them. So that's that's kind of
Speaker 1: my take on it. I'm the same way I'm I've
Speaker 1: kind of been on both sides of the spectrum. Same
Speaker 1: with Maxwell is I'll trust too much too soon, um,
Speaker 1: and then sometimes I just won't trust at all. And
Speaker 1: I think that really spoils down to the people that
Speaker 1: you're introducing into your life. Is if you trust too
Speaker 1: much too soon, maybe that person is just a trustworthy person.
Speaker 1: If you don't trust at all, then maybe that person
Speaker 1: just isn't meant to necessarily be in your life anyways. Yeah,
Speaker 1: obviously I don't want to speak to Maxwell because he's
Speaker 1: going through a different situation that I. You know, I
Speaker 1: don't want to pretend that I have answers to Um.
Speaker 1: I only wish him the best, But I amost don't
Speaker 1: trust somebody who doesn't have trust issues. You know, you
Speaker 1: have trust issues because like who hasn't been lied to?
Speaker 1: Who hasn't been kind of? There's is are you just
Speaker 1: the one human being who hasn't had anything bad happened
Speaker 1: to you or somebody lied to you? So I think
Speaker 1: maybe it's just like if you don't have trust issues,
Speaker 1: I'm not sure you've had enough life experience yet then
Speaker 1: that this doesn't play to Maxwell. I'm not trying to
Speaker 1: pretend it does. This is just me like literally formulating
Speaker 1: thoughts in my own head. I mean, like somebody who's
Speaker 1: just like so trustworthy or so trustful in other people.
Speaker 1: I think it's just naive. I think it really just
Speaker 1: boils down to what the other person is willing to
Speaker 1: tell you about themselves and if they're you know, because
Speaker 1: there's a lot of we all have dirty laundry at
Speaker 1: the end of the day. But if you're not, like,
Speaker 1: if you're not forthright about that, then you're probably not
Speaker 1: going to be honest about a lot of other things
Speaker 1: that are happening at w have happened to you as well.
Speaker 1: So someone so, someone like myself who has trust issues,
Speaker 1: I need to date someone that will tell me everything
Speaker 1: about themselves now, not something that they're going to feel
Speaker 1: comfortable telling me six months from now exactly. Well, yeah,
Speaker 1: for example, and you don't I don't know how to
Speaker 1: answer this, but in your relationship, do you guys know
Speaker 1: all each other's dirty laundry? Uh? Yeah, we we Yeah.
Speaker 1: I'm suring not all of it, but at least as
Speaker 1: it comes up in conversation, you're not willing to Yeah,
Speaker 1: But even Vanessa said, what if it doesn't come up
Speaker 1: in conversation until like nine months down the road, Well,
Speaker 1: that's fine. I think as long as the story I think, right,
Speaker 1: as long as the store doesn't change. And I'm someone
Speaker 1: who like doesn't like drip drip relationships, Like, I'm sorry
Speaker 1: to into it, but what I meant by that was say,
Speaker 1: it just doesn't come up and random conversation until like
Speaker 1: ten months into the relationship and you're like, why didn't
Speaker 1: you tell me that earlier? And he's like, well, I
Speaker 1: didn't want to. I didn't think it was really relevant.
Speaker 1: You need to know, Yeah, well no, what We've had
Speaker 1: conversations and I said, listen, whatever you think that you
Speaker 1: need to tell me, I would love to know. And
Speaker 1: I'm someone that won't judge, just tell me how it is.
Speaker 1: And I love honestly, there's nothing sexier than a man
Speaker 1: that can just be them else and be honest about
Speaker 1: their past and be honest about what they want in
Speaker 1: the future, because I've been in relationships where I was
Speaker 1: in one where he who I thought was the love
Speaker 1: of my life and for two years was telling me
Speaker 1: he wanted kids and then one day woke up and
Speaker 1: was like, I don't want kids, And I felt like
Speaker 1: I was lied to for the lat for two years
Speaker 1: of dating him. So I think that along with my parents.
Speaker 1: Divorce has led me to want to be in relationships
Speaker 1: where it's like honest, And maybe this is where the
Speaker 1: talk comes up, like I'm going to take it like
Speaker 1: I just want to be honest about stuff. I don't
Speaker 1: want to feel ashamed of anything that I do, or
Speaker 1: I don't want to have to keep anything a secret.
Speaker 1: Here's here's a scenario. I'm curious to get both your
Speaker 1: thoughts on because you say, like, there's nothing sex to
Speaker 1: you about a guy who's just completely honest and tells
Speaker 1: me the truth. But what if a dude cheated in
Speaker 1: his past relationship and he told you that early on? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I would appreciate him telling you that, But when when
Speaker 1: didn't give you so much hesitation to date him? I
Speaker 1: think correct me if I'm wrong. But I feel like
Speaker 1: a lot of people have either emotionally cheated or physically cheated, um,
Speaker 1: and I'd rather know if that person has I'd rather
Speaker 1: know from them instead of finding it out through the grapevine. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I agree with that wholeheartedly, and I take it back.
Speaker 1: I don't know if a lot of people have cheated,
Speaker 1: but I'm just saying I think a lot of people
Speaker 1: have done things in their past that they're shamed of,
Speaker 1: whether it's cheating or I'm willing to bet more people
Speaker 1: than we think have and more people that are willing
Speaker 1: to admit have as well. Um, do you think only
Speaker 1: cheating is cheating or emotionally? Like, if you're texting another
Speaker 1: girl that you find attractive, is that cheating? You know?
Speaker 1: I think if you ask me that question a year ago,
Speaker 1: I would say that physical is really the only way
Speaker 1: of going about it. But now I think that there's
Speaker 1: two forms, emotional and physical. Well, yeah, but it all
Speaker 1: depends on what the texts say to right. And I
Speaker 1: also think people have their own definition of what cheating
Speaker 1: is to make themselves feel better. Like we got that
Speaker 1: one email that came in a couple of weeks ago,
Speaker 1: and she was basically saying like how they've gotten bed
Speaker 1: together and but nothing physical happened, and then he never
Speaker 1: returned her phone calls and he deleted her off of Instagram.
Speaker 1: Remember that, They were like, oh, maybe he was dating
Speaker 1: someone and in his head, laying down naked next to
Speaker 1: someone else probably didn't mean cheating because they never physically
Speaker 1: got physical. That would sums. I heard that about the
Speaker 1: girl that I was doing Anyways, Vanessa, So we do
Speaker 1: have Kimry Lewis gracing us with her presence in our studio. Hi, guys,
Speaker 1: I'm so excited to be here at a whole uber fiasco.
Speaker 1: But I'm excited. Thank you so much for coming. We
Speaker 1: appreciate it, Thank you, thanks for having me. So you
Speaker 1: might know Kimry Lewis from the ABC hit show Single Parents,
Speaker 1: which is on Wednesdays at nine and thirty. And you
Speaker 1: we just saw Kimry. We're from the Bachelor franchise, all
Speaker 1: three of us and you just had a special guest
Speaker 1: appearance who was also He's like he's the King of
Speaker 1: Bachelor obviously. Yes, Chris B. Harrison and you guys were
Speaker 1: at the mansion. Yeah, we had a crossover episode, two
Speaker 1: crossover episodes this week. Um, I was on The Bachelor
Speaker 1: with Late and Easter and Chris was on our show.
Speaker 1: Yeah killing it. So are you a Bachelor fan? I am?
Speaker 1: You know, I hadn't watched it, watched it in a
Speaker 1: long time, but I started watching, you know, to prep
Speaker 1: for the to prep for Chris's arrival. Arrival, dude, the
Speaker 1: most and what a season to like be on. This
Speaker 1: season was crazy crazy. It was a good season. Colton
Speaker 1: was a good bachelor. Jump that fence boy was so romantic.
Speaker 1: I thought so too. He was like, I can't take
Speaker 1: it anymore. I gotta go after her. If it's not
Speaker 1: like taking this show, I'm going after one woman. I
Speaker 1: was like, oh, well, that's what I wanted. It brought
Speaker 1: up two conversations for me. One Either he wants Cassie
Speaker 1: so badly he's going after her and taking giving everything
Speaker 1: he can get, or he wants what he can't have.
Speaker 1: I think he just wanted to get away from anyone.
Speaker 1: I think so. I think he's run away from production
Speaker 1: to I mean, he's like two and a half months
Speaker 1: in and he's like losing his mind. He's like, I
Speaker 1: just need to be alone for a second. But I
Speaker 1: think it also said a new standard, like if you're
Speaker 1: not jump and fences for me, get out of here.
Speaker 1: Sure you know I want to see you jump over
Speaker 1: goddamn fence for me, please. That's what Kimmy, that's the
Speaker 1: point I'm trying to make. I don't think he was
Speaker 1: jumping the fence for Cassie. I think he was jumping
Speaker 1: this fence for his own sanity to get out. Yeah. Wow, Well,
Speaker 1: now we're going to see it was like a two fer,
Speaker 1: right because he jumped the fence because Cassie left. But
Speaker 1: he kind of needed to get away from production to
Speaker 1: really collect his thoughts too. But Kimber, your native l
Speaker 1: A And what would you call it? What is Angelina?
Speaker 1: So I'm from Roland, So I'm still learning out these firms.
Speaker 1: What do you guys call yourself? Rhode Islanders? Okay? Nice?
Speaker 1: At some point a person native from l A is
Speaker 1: an Angelino? Ya native Angelina? No? Stop it? Yep, right baby,
Speaker 1: Well I'm from Montreal. Someone Montreal, Montreal in Colorado? Al right, Colorado? Still?
Speaker 1: I mean I still think Angeline, don't catch you'll beat
Speaker 1: like it's just it's it just it feels like palm trees.
Speaker 1: I feel like you should have halo over you. We
Speaker 1: told more about single parents. Single parents. Oh man, it's
Speaker 1: it's a great show. It's created by Liz Maryweather and J. J.
Speaker 1: Philbin from the New Girl franchise, and uh it starts
Speaker 1: myself late me Stir, Taryn kill Um, Jake Joy and
Speaker 1: Brad garrett Um. And it's about this group of parents
Speaker 1: who come together who you know wouldn't ordinarily hang out
Speaker 1: with each other, but because their kids are all in
Speaker 1: the same class, they hang out and help each other
Speaker 1: through social issues and dating and the whole nine. It's
Speaker 1: a village. Now, you're an actors and a comedian, I am. Yes.
Speaker 1: Do you do stand up as well? I'm a stand
Speaker 1: up comic. My home club is Flappers and Burbank. Have
Speaker 1: you been to Montreal for the just for last festival?
Speaker 1: I have. I've been to Montreal, but I haven't been
Speaker 1: for that festival yet, so I'm looking forward to it.
Speaker 1: I have a friend, I have a bunch of friends
Speaker 1: who have been and they say it's amazing. Oh, it's
Speaker 1: it's my favorite time of the year. Yeah. Yeah, every
Speaker 1: big comedian, Kevin hard, Um, Jimmy Kimmel comes out there.
Speaker 1: Tiffany Hattish started with yep, Yeah, she filmed her special
Speaker 1: last year, I think, or the year before. Yeah. I
Speaker 1: think Canada is just like a clean New York. That
Speaker 1: tell us a little bit more than with single parents.
Speaker 1: How do you guys stay? I guess topical with the
Speaker 1: events as a single parent, because you're not a single parent.
Speaker 1: I'm not a single parent, but I grew up in
Speaker 1: a single parent household, and so and I have a
Speaker 1: lot of friends or a single parents. So I just
Speaker 1: have a lot of experience and you know, experiences to
Speaker 1: pull from UM related to that, you know, I think
Speaker 1: more more than ever, there's a lot more single parents.
Speaker 1: Like people aren't doing the whole married thing. They're not
Speaker 1: waiting around UM and so you know, in this coming episode,
Speaker 1: we talked about, you know how financially how it can
Speaker 1: be a burden. You know, you have that one person income.
Speaker 1: We talk about, you know, how do you how do
Speaker 1: you be the best parent you can be for your kid?
Speaker 1: How do you start dating? You know, how do you
Speaker 1: tell your kid that you're going to be dating somebody else?
Speaker 1: You know, like do you have a specialist that comes
Speaker 1: in or like a therapist that helps prep or gives
Speaker 1: you guys advice on we know how to interact? You know,
Speaker 1: we pull a lot from our our group, and we
Speaker 1: we got a lot of mask cort On, Jake and
Speaker 1: I are single. I think the other three are married.
Speaker 1: But between us and the writers, we just got stories
Speaker 1: for days. Like you said, you grew up in a
Speaker 1: single parent house, Absolutely sure you can draw from a
Speaker 1: lot of experience from there. Yeah, I remember, like I
Speaker 1: hated on my mom's first guy. I was like, Uh,
Speaker 1: you're not coming up in here. This is me. It's
Speaker 1: you know, it's me a mom. This is what it is,
Speaker 1: is what we've been doing. Um. So yeah, I made
Speaker 1: it very difficult. Um. And then my dad also got
Speaker 1: remarried and that was the whole thing. So you know,
Speaker 1: there's um, there's that, there's the real life. And I
Speaker 1: think that's what I love about this show is that
Speaker 1: it talks about real issues. It deals with real issues.
Speaker 1: It's not you know, picture perfect, um, but it also
Speaker 1: has heart and it's funny. Well and like you said
Speaker 1: to now, more than ever, seems like you see a
Speaker 1: lot of single parents, so many, so I'm sure it's
Speaker 1: very relatable for a large part of the population where
Speaker 1: they can tune in and kind of because it's a
Speaker 1: it's a comedy, so they can tune in and kind
Speaker 1: of get a laugh out of something that they might
Speaker 1: be experiencing in their personal life. Absolutely, and you know,
Speaker 1: we have a lot of kids who watch too. I
Speaker 1: like it. It's like I'm a family event. It's like
Speaker 1: I get my wine, you get your juice box, let's
Speaker 1: do this. I feel like it's also for people who
Speaker 1: are single in the last episode, your character gets um
Speaker 1: an invitation to her ex is whether your ex husband
Speaker 1: or your ex boyfriend or ex husband wedding, wedding. And
Speaker 1: that's like, I remember every time I would break up
Speaker 1: with someone or someone would break up with me, I'm like,
Speaker 1: I would dread the day I find out that my
Speaker 1: ex is now getting married or my ex is engaged,
Speaker 1: or my ex has moved on. So like that was
Speaker 1: a moment I was like, I totally relate. Yeah, it's
Speaker 1: a trip. Like in now with Facebook and everything, you
Speaker 1: see that it is in your face um and yeah,
Speaker 1: Poppy had to deal with that in the last episode.
Speaker 1: I've been dealing with it. H personal. Well, I got
Speaker 1: a lot of ex is out there. Shout out to them,
Speaker 1: big shout out to our ex is because Vanessa, you
Speaker 1: bring up an interesting point, but how you dread the
Speaker 1: day you find out an X is married or so
Speaker 1: and so think about x is of ours. Well, while
Speaker 1: we're on that topic here, it's like someone since someone's
Speaker 1: getting married this year, or any of your or Ashley's
Speaker 1: X is going to be at the wedding. Uh, well, yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean bachelor axes. That doesn't I mean Caitlin is invited. Okay, sure,
Speaker 1: I wanna feel like Kayla Quinn or obviously we're not
Speaker 1: friends with Kayla, so that would be we're not gonna
Speaker 1: be invited in Kyla's wedding. And then but Caitlin, I
Speaker 1: believe is invited. She got to save the day and
Speaker 1: she's technically an X. And then for I think that's
Speaker 1: really the only one that we've like quote unquote dated
Speaker 1: from the show. Uh, No, we're not that. We're you know,
Speaker 1: we're friendly with Sean and Katherine, but we're not you know,
Speaker 1: friends with them. But they're nice people. But no, I
Speaker 1: think that's really it anyway. Interesting, But it's a it's
Speaker 1: a weird thing, awkward, it's an akward thing. You know,
Speaker 1: like your life is in the public, So if you
Speaker 1: were dating someone, it's like your ex is going to
Speaker 1: know that. Well, my ex boyfriend DJ my wedding no
Speaker 1: longer married. But yeah, my ex boyfriend, the guy who
Speaker 1: I went to prom with DJ my wedding, how'd that go?
Speaker 1: He got the tunes? Dude? Wait, did you know that
Speaker 1: he was djaying it? Or were you hiring a company?
Speaker 1: And then he showed up? No, we knew. Now, ex husband,
Speaker 1: we interviewed and we sat him down, was like, hey,
Speaker 1: you know, what do you like? He was like R
Speaker 1: and B you know, classic hip hop. And my husband
Speaker 1: was like, you got the job. That's a real power move.
Speaker 1: I think that I'm going to just seek out one
Speaker 1: of my exes who probably isn't even a DJ, and
Speaker 1: she'd be like, hey, I'm getting married, you want a
Speaker 1: DJ it for me? Yeah? And I also think he
Speaker 1: gave us like a better rate. You know, he gave
Speaker 1: us that like that that ex discount rate, yeah, or
Speaker 1: the ex inflated rate because he's like I'm going to yeah,
Speaker 1: but he messed it up so you felt bad. It
Speaker 1: was that guilty discount. It's You've got a lot going
Speaker 1: on then, professionally, right, I do so besides the acting
Speaker 1: in the stand up comedy, what do you kind of
Speaker 1: I guess enjoy doing the most just all of it. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: Well I also write. I'm a writer for Kevin I do. Yeah,
Speaker 1: Kevin Hard. We have a new show web series coming
Speaker 1: out on Kevin's network. Um, and I'm also directing. I'm
Speaker 1: directing my first short film and a month thanks so much. Um.
Speaker 1: It's it's a dark comedy. We uh, I can't talk
Speaker 1: that much about it. Oh come on, you tease. We
Speaker 1: haven't shot it yet, so you haven't grand pre now.
Speaker 1: So I'm very interested from an actor's perspective of the
Speaker 1: difference between being on set as an actor and being
Speaker 1: on set as a director. Absolutely, always her stories, you know,
Speaker 1: whether it be someone like Jordan Peel who has US
Speaker 1: coming out or Ben Affleck because you know, and US
Speaker 1: looks terrible, fantastic. I was watching the preview for it,
Speaker 1: and I think I had to close my eyes for
Speaker 1: at least half of it. And it's just a preview,
Speaker 1: Like I can't the movie is gonna be twenty times scarier. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but I feel like I hear a lot of these
Speaker 1: stories of actors who are going through the business and
Speaker 1: then learn that they want to become directors and create
Speaker 1: their own film. Is that what happened with you? That's
Speaker 1: where it's at for me. I think stand up helped
Speaker 1: with that bridge. You know, as an actor, you write,
Speaker 1: you're you're not writing your own stuff. You're saying other
Speaker 1: people's words, you know, But is a stand up and
Speaker 1: as a writer and you know, now director, you're saying
Speaker 1: your word. You get to kind of craft that story
Speaker 1: that you want to tell, right, Um, so yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: looking forward to having a lot less hours in hair
Speaker 1: and makeup. Yeah. You get to show up and sweatpants
Speaker 1: and where and just have a coffee in your hand
Speaker 1: and yell ye stuff with people. Yeah, that's super exciting.
Speaker 1: I'm good at yelling stuff with people. Why don't you
Speaker 1: do bulleth Why don't you direct end act in the
Speaker 1: same film. I think that that'll be that'll come out
Speaker 1: on the line. But you want to focus your all
Speaker 1: your effort on directing right now. I just wanted to
Speaker 1: be good. I want to knock it out the park.
Speaker 1: And did you write this short film as well? So
Speaker 1: you did not write this one? Okay, so you're directing
Speaker 1: other So that's another story. You're directing a different story.
Speaker 1: Does that make you nervous at all? It? Um, it's
Speaker 1: a relatable story, so it doesn't make me nervous. And
Speaker 1: I'm working with people cast and crew that I know,
Speaker 1: so you know, is it about single parents? It's not
Speaker 1: about single parents? That would be funny. He's good a
Speaker 1: get information other people. Yeah, recruit all my my cast
Speaker 1: and my current show, like guys, let's go do this
Speaker 1: other thing. Um, No, it's it's not about single parents.
Speaker 1: It's it's all women in the cast. I can't say
Speaker 1: that that. Yeah, all women. I'm in front of and
Speaker 1: behind the camera. Okay, nineteen we're behind the camera. Took
Speaker 1: you guys. Yeah so I'm not. Yeah, I'm one of
Speaker 1: my favorite directors of all times. Kathin Bigelow. Oh my gosh,
Speaker 1: she's fantastic, brilliant Point Break. People forget that she directed
Speaker 1: Point Break. It's one of my favorite movies of all time.
Speaker 1: The Old One, Old One, okay with Kiano come on
Speaker 1: and Patrick. I mean the No One's pretty good too, Actually,
Speaker 1: I'll be I was pretty pleasantly surprised by watching that one. Anyway,
Speaker 1: before you got into acting, was there anybody that inspired you,
Speaker 1: whether it be stand up or acting, that got you
Speaker 1: thinking like, man, I want to do this, this is
Speaker 1: what I wanted to do with my life. Whoopi Goldberg
Speaker 1: always been my inspiration. Um. She just I think the
Speaker 1: way she started off, you know, doing theater. I come
Speaker 1: from a theater background, major in theater at n y U.
Speaker 1: UM that live storytelling is for me has always been
Speaker 1: my passion. Um and how she was able to catapult
Speaker 1: that into film and television, and you know back that,
Speaker 1: Like if you think about Whoopee, like she was doing
Speaker 1: stuff back then that no other black woman was doing before,
Speaker 1: I mean way before her time. You talked about like
Speaker 1: like if you pitched a black woman doing a show
Speaker 1: about being a nun like a former criminal who turned
Speaker 1: into a nun, like, we would be like what um?
Speaker 1: And that was years ago. It was decades ago. So um,
Speaker 1: I just love and appreciate how she took her own story,
Speaker 1: owned it and you know, made it a story that
Speaker 1: we can all, you know, talk to and relate about. Now,
Speaker 1: whoop you doing nowadays? Whoopie is doing the view and
Speaker 1: she still does she still does dates. Yeah, yeah, man,
Speaker 1: she's grinding. She doesn't Yeah, she's not a big flyer.
Speaker 1: I know that she doesn't like to fly, so whenever
Speaker 1: she can. So well, come on with your with your status,
Speaker 1: your celebrity status, you and will you have to be
Speaker 1: best friends by now? No? Do I have celebrities you
Speaker 1: good to tell by my d M you guys sides M.
Speaker 1: I am very offended by that. I don't know why. Okay, questions,
Speaker 1: So you're single then? Yeah, I know you said you're
Speaker 1: divorced Um, let's get you on the Bachelor, dude. Let's
Speaker 1: make it happen right now, you make it happen. We've
Speaker 1: already got the inside line. We already know Chris. You
Speaker 1: know Chris, you've been at the mansion, so it's like
Speaker 1: a second home to you know, to layout. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: could just I could pull up right now. We could
Speaker 1: shoot it real quick. Come on, let me know. Do
Speaker 1: you guys have any friends? Do you have any single
Speaker 1: friends you can me up with? I mean to come up,
Speaker 1: you have to cook you up. Yeah, how's your credit?
Speaker 1: What's coming? And talked about it last week bag on
Speaker 1: the plane. We could work with that, we could we
Speaker 1: could work with So what's dating like for you in
Speaker 1: l A? It's a trip? Um? I I was just
Speaker 1: telling my publists. I went on a I had my
Speaker 1: third date at my birthday party. Basically yepkay, it was great.
Speaker 1: That was the thing. Like, you can't invite just anybody
Speaker 1: to your birthday party, you know what I mean? Like,
Speaker 1: these are the people who I love the most, were
Speaker 1: closest to me. I had some you know, I had
Speaker 1: some family there. So um, he just blended in seamlessly.
Speaker 1: It was he dressed the part big test. If if
Speaker 1: someone you're dating can get along with your friends is
Speaker 1: actually one of my most important tests, per absolutely. Our
Speaker 1: first date was thirteen hours and on airplane, No was plane.
Speaker 1: It was like four dates in one. It was amazing.
Speaker 1: We went to like a carnival game show trivia thing.
Speaker 1: I really like, you know, competitive staff side was into that.
Speaker 1: And then we went to eat, and then we went
Speaker 1: to coffee, and then we went to we took a
Speaker 1: walk around the block. It was kind of like out
Speaker 1: of a movie. Um, so, yeah, we're still dating. He
Speaker 1: got me good gifts. That's important. Wait, so you're you're
Speaker 1: not very single, you're dating? Oh no, I'm su I'm single,
Speaker 1: you're single, I'm super single. We're Yeah, that was just
Speaker 1: he just happens to be a nice guy. The thing is, too,
Speaker 1: I feel like, with your schedule, it's gotta be time
Speaker 1: to even carve it's gotta be hard to carve away
Speaker 1: time for someone else. That's true too. But now we wrapped,
Speaker 1: so I got time. I'm on all the apps. I
Speaker 1: just signed up a j date. Okay, no, I was
Speaker 1: gonna say I'm on all of them? Am I Jewish?
Speaker 1: No single? But that doesn't mean I'm not open. I
Speaker 1: love you. Are you on? Ya? Oh? You are on dude.
Speaker 1: I would totally swipe right on you. I would do
Speaker 1: that in a heartbeat. What's your riot song? Um, it's
Speaker 1: it's Chance the Rapper right, Yeah, so I take it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I was award winner. I was going to say earlier.
Speaker 1: As a guy, especially after a couple of days, you
Speaker 1: never want to be described to friends as he's a
Speaker 1: nice guy, he's a nice guy. Anytime a girl described
Speaker 1: someone as a he's a nice guy, it's not going anywhere,
Speaker 1: but he's a nice show. No, I described my boyfriend
Speaker 1: now is a nice guy, and even like we had
Speaker 1: someone on and I was like, I want someone who's nice.
Speaker 1: I want Jared just said that Vanessa's relationship isn't going anywhere.
Speaker 1: There's there's a difference. No, No, there's a difference between
Speaker 1: saying your significant other is nice and then me asking, hey,
Speaker 1: how was it with that guy? And you're saying he's
Speaker 1: a nice guy. That is two very different things. I
Speaker 1: don't think I've ever heard someone talk about their future
Speaker 1: husband in the first sentence. Saying he's a nice guy.
Speaker 1: See nice to me is like a turn on. I
Speaker 1: not a date once and this guy I saw a
Speaker 1: homeless man who was in a wheelchair. He went up
Speaker 1: to him, knew him by name, and gave him money.
Speaker 1: He was like, hey, what are you doing gave him money.
Speaker 1: I was like, dude, I would have sex with you
Speaker 1: right now. Guy on the street, Um, we're still talking.
Speaker 1: I like to have a lot of burners going. Okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: he's a nice guy. Okay. Great kindness is a wonderful
Speaker 1: turn on. Kindness is something that everybody should have, that
Speaker 1: the majority of people do have, which is fantastic. But
Speaker 1: what I'm saying is when people describe someone as hey,
Speaker 1: he's a nice guy, as the one of the first
Speaker 1: things you come up with as a person tree, I
Speaker 1: find that usually it's not going anyone unless being a
Speaker 1: nice guy is what makes you want to jump their
Speaker 1: bones the most. That might be all right for you
Speaker 1: to come back. I want you to come back on
Speaker 1: this podcast and about five or six months and see
Speaker 1: if you're still talking to that guy. Okay, good, you know.
Speaker 1: But you know why I like nice because I did
Speaker 1: the bad boys already. You guys are misinterpreting my words.
Speaker 1: I'm not saying you should be with a nice guy.
Speaker 1: I'm not saying your boyfriend is a nice and that's
Speaker 1: not a turn on for you. What I'm saying is
Speaker 1: that that is your default response, he's a nice guy.
Speaker 1: It's not going to because you're saying it's so dry
Speaker 1: like he's a nice guy. Because girl, he's a nice guy.
Speaker 1: You know, like he is nice. It turns on the Yep.
Speaker 1: It makes me think about the inflection. Of course if
Speaker 1: you change that up. But I just I still I'm
Speaker 1: gonna stick with my words. I'm painting with a broad
Speaker 1: brush because it's more interesting that way. Um, But I
Speaker 1: want to know, Yeah, I think I think it's underestimated.
Speaker 1: I think kindness is underestimated. So I think every woman
Speaker 1: wants someone who's nice and kind, but they also want
Speaker 1: somebody who's a little bit of like a rough side
Speaker 1: and little bit of a bad boy side to them.
Speaker 1: But someone who's like going to treat his mom nice
Speaker 1: and it's going to think about you on like not
Speaker 1: not the special occasions, like the guy who's gonna like
Speaker 1: bring flowers or chocolate because he thought he saw them,
Speaker 1: he thought about you, but he's also like he's got
Speaker 1: that side to him that's you know, is it too
Speaker 1: how many dates until you want to see the flowers
Speaker 1: from a guy I never even met, I never even met.
Speaker 1: I agree with her. I never even met my boyfriend
Speaker 1: now and he sent me a bouquet of kit cats
Speaker 1: because he knows that only flowers. So you sent me
Speaker 1: a bouquet. Why do they do everything? Because you guys
Speaker 1: are chasing it. We are even playing ground. Yeah sure,
Speaker 1: but but do it No, I'm listen. I don't preach
Speaker 1: what I say because I obviously do the opposite. And
Speaker 1: I get things for Ashley and I want to make
Speaker 1: her feel special. Actually also does a lot for you,
Speaker 1: but actually does it's it's different, yeah, surprise wise like
Speaker 1: she'd be, you know, but it's not just gifts like
Speaker 1: you guys don't just you don't have to bring gifts you. Also,
Speaker 1: I want to see how you're interacting with waiters, you know,
Speaker 1: with the people that you like. If you're mean to
Speaker 1: a waiter, it's my biggest pet. Peeve. Did you work
Speaker 1: in the hospitality industry? I did it worked at Danny's.
Speaker 1: Shout out to Danny. I'll be honest, I really do. Actually,
Speaker 1: I honestly think it should be a college curriculum. I
Speaker 1: think there should be a class where you were quired
Speaker 1: to look at work at least four to six months
Speaker 1: in the restaurant industry, because that teaches you so much
Speaker 1: about life and how you should treat people. Absolutely, I
Speaker 1: worked at a restaurant for a month in college. Hated it.
Speaker 1: Quit which restaurant? It was just like some local Mexican
Speaker 1: restaurant in my college town. What did you do? Bus? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I was a bust at a bar back, but I worked, Okay,
Speaker 1: I was. I was a buss er too. I worked
Speaker 1: in a hotel for five years, so I think that's
Speaker 1: that's my equivalent. That's good. I worked at Bubba Gump,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, yeah, in New York too, and you know
Speaker 1: that must have been hectic, you know, it's it's a
Speaker 1: lot of tourists and New Yorkers. New Yorkers aren't the
Speaker 1: nicest time, especially a Bubba Gump. You're not many local
Speaker 1: New Orkers are probably gonna be going Bubba Gump. Right,
Speaker 1: It's true, Right, that's very true. There's a Bubba Gump
Speaker 1: on the Santa Monica Pier, right, I just learned about that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: if the single parents doesn't come back, I might have
Speaker 1: to fine. I think you're just fine after Scandal and
Speaker 1: our Single Parents, You're gonna be just fine. Well, I
Speaker 1: was going to ask you too, because you're a stand
Speaker 1: up comedian and uh an actor. Um, do you have
Speaker 1: any ambitions to be on SNL? Because I don't know.
Speaker 1: When I was watching Single Parents, I just saw your churisman,
Speaker 1: your personality and your communic timing, and then obviously I
Speaker 1: saw Taran who was on SNL Urse who was on
Speaker 1: there for a year, and I was thinking before you
Speaker 1: came in, I was like, man, can we would be
Speaker 1: a really good cast member on SNL. You know, I
Speaker 1: would enjoy that sketch life, but I would enjoy it
Speaker 1: as my own show. So I recently wrote pilot that
Speaker 1: I just sold. It's a sketch show. Yep, that's that's
Speaker 1: what I want to do. Just every single time you talk,
Speaker 1: you're talking about something else that you're doing. That's just
Speaker 1: as well. That's why it's so hard to day you
Speaker 1: and I got our asses together. Man, just casual drops
Speaker 1: the pilot that gets picked up. I mean, I love it.
Speaker 1: What else where else could we fine? Do you? I
Speaker 1: guess because you're on Instagram? Yeah, yep, on the Gram,
Speaker 1: I'm on Twitter and face what's the handle? Give us
Speaker 1: a shame of everything? I am Kimber and it's k
Speaker 1: I am r I e yes. Spelling is also like
Speaker 1: a turn on for me. Third Great Spelling Champion. I
Speaker 1: want my sixth grete spelling be so you know, I'm
Speaker 1: sure my words are a little bit harder than yours.
Speaker 1: Not to brag. You guys have so much in common.
Speaker 1: What's your side? My birthday? Just great synergy. Um and
Speaker 1: Single Parents want to Single Parents air Wednesdays. Obviously I
Speaker 1: knew that, but I just wanted the listeners to know that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: So Wednesday nights at nine thirty a b C. You
Speaker 1: can check Single Parents is a new episode coming out
Speaker 1: this Wednesday. Guys, check it out. It's amazing show. Before
Speaker 1: you go, though, Kim Marie, we do have an email
Speaker 1: and one more email that we have to answer that.
Speaker 1: I would love to get your thoughts on. Let's do
Speaker 1: it because you were so many connections be made between
Speaker 1: you and Dean. There's something about Dean that you should
Speaker 1: probably not hit me. Hit me? Do you? You can
Speaker 1: tell me anyone? I'm moving out of my house in
Speaker 1: a couple of months and I'm going to live in
Speaker 1: a van full time. Okay, I figured before you guys
Speaker 1: going first day, this is something you should talk about.
Speaker 1: This an conscious choice or is this like a forced
Speaker 1: at a necessity. Um No, I've just always wanted to
Speaker 1: do it, and so now is my time to try it.
Speaker 1: For how long are you going to live in as well?
Speaker 1: Roughly three months but maybe longer. Who knows? Three months minimum? Well,
Speaker 1: what kind of van is it? Oh, it's gonna be
Speaker 1: I don't know, you like like an old school of
Speaker 1: e W. Like it's gonna be like a van that's
Speaker 1: converted into a living space, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: So it's got like a bed and a fridge. It's
Speaker 1: gonna be a nice van. It's not like I'm just
Speaker 1: gonna buy a van and sleep on the seats in
Speaker 1: the back of it or anything like that, you know. Um,
Speaker 1: but yeah's something I've always wanted to do it, like
Speaker 1: I've I've told Jared in Vanessa before, I lived in
Speaker 1: a bus for like four years as a child, and
Speaker 1: it's just kind of returning to my roots sort of
Speaker 1: thing now. But you know, after all this talk on
Speaker 1: the podcast about this, there's no turning back. Oh well,
Speaker 1: so that's the thing. And I'm kind of scary because
Speaker 1: I don't have the van yet, right, Like I said,
Speaker 1: two months to basically buy a van turn it into
Speaker 1: something I want to live in for three months. Um,
Speaker 1: but I've got my room rented out already, so it's
Speaker 1: like come May twenty, I think is the day that
Speaker 1: my sub lease begins. And so regardless, I'm out. You know, well,
Speaker 1: if you need a couch to crash on before you
Speaker 1: get your van, I'll sleep on your peace stay And
Speaker 1: it's hopefully we'll have a new one from Joy run
Speaker 1: by then. Um. But this is an email from a listener, Sarah.
Speaker 1: It says the headline is a van life. It says, Hey, there,
Speaker 1: my husband and I and our dogs are moving into
Speaker 1: a van on April one. So I was excited to
Speaker 1: hear that Dean is doing the same thing. We have
Speaker 1: rented out our house and our quitting jobs to fully
Speaker 1: immerse ourselves in it and travel. As far as showering,
Speaker 1: we have a solar shower pretty much a bag that
Speaker 1: you said in the sun to warm and has a
Speaker 1: small nozzle that we try it out and worked well.
Speaker 1: If you find yourself not in the city, I appreciate
Speaker 1: hearing Dean's outlook on life or respect that he's going
Speaker 1: to live a minimal lifestyle despite all his success. That
Speaker 1: really doesn't question. It was kind of just like gonna
Speaker 1: be a van question. But that's okay, it's very nice
Speaker 1: if you, Sara, you should do like a pimp my van. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you know, do you think exhibit is free here? I mean,
Speaker 1: what do you do for showers? Well, that's why she
Speaker 1: I think brought up the whole shower thing is because
Speaker 1: initially I plan just on a shower for three months,
Speaker 1: which just sounds like the most deberating thing of all time.
Speaker 1: Are you just going to get a life supply of
Speaker 1: daty wife, I'm gonna get like gym memberships and bathe
Speaker 1: in the ocean. I'm gonna be gone for like a
Speaker 1: large part of the three months as well. Like I'm
Speaker 1: gonna be in Europe for a month, so I'm traveling.
Speaker 1: And then yeah, you get a gym membership and you
Speaker 1: shower there. So I guess the question to you cameras,
Speaker 1: would you ever see or consider yourself dating a guy
Speaker 1: that lives in a van. I'm down. I'm actually open
Speaker 1: to it. I'm open to anything and everything right now,
Speaker 1: that's great, all this green post Saint Patty's Day too.
Speaker 1: Keeping it real. Um, what if you met a guy
Speaker 1: at a bar and he's like, Okay, do you want
Speaker 1: to come back to my place? And you go, sure,
Speaker 1: we're hitting it off, this is great, and then his
Speaker 1: place is just around the corner on the side of
Speaker 1: the street in a van. You wouldn't be. You wouldn't
Speaker 1: be like I would freak out. You would Yeah, exactly,
Speaker 1: I would freak out like I would mean. First of all,
Speaker 1: I always text my best friend you know, hey, this
Speaker 1: is my location, you know, sending that, you know, for
Speaker 1: first dates, which I don't think guys are, Like, guys
Speaker 1: aren't afraid of losing their life on the first date.
Speaker 1: Women are not. When they're sex on the line. I
Speaker 1: think guys will basically do anything well, even with sex
Speaker 1: on the line. I think women are you know, we're fraid.
Speaker 1: You should be it's good to you should be saying
Speaker 1: you should always air on the side of caution. I
Speaker 1: guess it's the point that I'm trying to make that
Speaker 1: I do do that. Yeah, but if it's like if
Speaker 1: it's somebody that I had already met and you know,
Speaker 1: felt comfortable and safe with then yeah, sure we'll go
Speaker 1: to your We'll go to your van, but no, of
Speaker 1: course it's very smart. Always keep your location services on
Speaker 1: and let a friend know where you're at all times,
Speaker 1: because you just don't know. It's a scary world we're living.
Speaker 1: It could be or it could be exciting, and yeah,
Speaker 1: you can need a nice guy in their van, and
Speaker 1: who knows, who knows. Thank you so much for coming,
Speaker 1: thank you for congratulations on our success, and obviously we
Speaker 1: wish shooting nothing but the best moving forward as well,
Speaker 1: and as Jared sent, six months from now, we want
Speaker 1: to get you back in here and see if you're
Speaker 1: still dating a nice guy that I'll keep you guys
Speaker 1: posted and everybody can see a single parents on Wednesday's
Speaker 1: ABC at thirty. So big, thank you so much, kimry
Speaker 1: Lewis for coming in. Big thank you to joy Bird.
Speaker 1: You can go to joeybird dot com slash d Dean
Speaker 1: and receive an exclusive offer for off your first order
Speaker 1: by using the code dean um. Also big thank you
Speaker 1: to Sleep Number. You can find sleep Number at one
Speaker 1: of their five seventy five sleep Number stores nationwide. All
Speaker 1: you have to do is visit Sleep Number dot com
Speaker 1: slash Dean Dean and the one to find the one Nearest,
Speaker 1: and a very very big thank you to one of
Speaker 1: my favorite investing apps, robin Hood. Make sure to sign
Speaker 1: up at Dean one dot robin hood dot com and
Speaker 1: get a free stock like Apple, Ford or Sprint to
Speaker 1: help you build your portfolio today. And one thing I
Speaker 1: want to talk to you guys all about as our
Speaker 1: listeners is our big Nappa Um event that we're having
Speaker 1: on April six in Napa. Obviously, all the money wine Train,
Speaker 1: all the money raised will go to the Red Cross
Speaker 1: for earthquake preparedness. All you have to do is go
Speaker 1: to if only dot com for for more information. It's
Speaker 1: gonna be US three. I think Blake's going to be there,
Speaker 1: Ashley and Ben are going to be there, back Up
Speaker 1: going to be there to all the homies are gonna
Speaker 1: be radio podcast. But I think Janet Kramer is gonna
Speaker 1: be there, Wells is going to be there, Easton is
Speaker 1: gonna be there. Mark are you coming? Mark? You're not coming?
Speaker 1: Nobody's gonna come. If you don't come, you're not gonna
Speaker 1: raise any money for the Red Cross. UM. But anyway
Speaker 1: only dot com if youmation about that it would love
Speaker 1: to love to see you guys there. Yeah, you guys
Speaker 1: can come sip wine with us and it also comes
Speaker 1: with a four course meal on the Napa Valley Wine Train.
Speaker 1: Thank you guys all so much for being listeners of
Speaker 1: the podcast this week, but be sure to tune in
Speaker 1: next week. We got a very very big episode for you.
Speaker 1: Um tune in then maybe we'll suck a little bit less.
Speaker 1: Follow help buy Stuck at Dating with Dean, Vanessa and
Speaker 1: Jared on I Heart Radio or wherever you listen to
Speaker 1: podcast by