1 00:00:01,720 --> 00:00:09,600 Speaker 1: You're listening to I Choose Me with Jenny Garth. Hi, everybody, 2 00:00:09,760 --> 00:00:14,640 Speaker 1: welcome to the I Choose Me Podcast. So this is 3 00:00:14,720 --> 00:00:17,200 Speaker 1: a very difficult time that we are all going through. 4 00:00:17,280 --> 00:00:21,560 Speaker 1: We are all experiencing this great loss of our friend 5 00:00:22,160 --> 00:00:29,560 Speaker 1: Shannon Doherty. Because I know that we're all feeling this sadness, 6 00:00:29,680 --> 00:00:35,680 Speaker 1: this happiness. Grief is just so unique to each one 7 00:00:35,720 --> 00:00:41,839 Speaker 1: of us, plays out differently for everybody, and I just 8 00:00:41,960 --> 00:00:47,240 Speaker 1: wanted to acknowledge this huge, huge loss. I'm gonna have 9 00:00:47,479 --> 00:00:52,920 Speaker 1: my best friend, Adele, our therapist, come in, and it 10 00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:57,920 Speaker 1: helped me to sort of process my feelings and talk 11 00:00:57,960 --> 00:01:02,200 Speaker 1: about grief with us in hopes that this will help 12 00:01:02,680 --> 00:01:06,280 Speaker 1: you guys, if you're feeling the same as I am, 13 00:01:06,680 --> 00:01:10,120 Speaker 1: which I'm pretty sure you are. Hi, Adele, thank you. 14 00:01:11,040 --> 00:01:14,959 Speaker 2: Of course, I have not seen you or talked to 15 00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:19,440 Speaker 2: you other than by text since we heard the news 16 00:01:19,480 --> 00:01:23,240 Speaker 2: about Shannon, and I'm honored and glad that you wanted 17 00:01:23,280 --> 00:01:26,720 Speaker 2: to include me in this conversation. And I'm I'm glad 18 00:01:26,760 --> 00:01:28,480 Speaker 2: you want to be of service to your nine O, 19 00:01:28,560 --> 00:01:34,080 Speaker 2: two and o family that's grieving, and from what I 20 00:01:34,120 --> 00:01:36,280 Speaker 2: can tell by the news cycle, it's more than just 21 00:01:36,319 --> 00:01:38,160 Speaker 2: your nine oh two and O family grieving. 22 00:01:38,920 --> 00:01:44,679 Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a big family. The whole world definitely feels 23 00:01:44,920 --> 00:01:48,600 Speaker 1: the loss. I think, you know, whether you are a 24 00:01:48,600 --> 00:01:51,280 Speaker 1: fan of the show or one of her other shows, 25 00:01:53,000 --> 00:01:56,120 Speaker 1: or if you were a fan of the way she 26 00:01:56,200 --> 00:02:00,600 Speaker 1: was addressing her battle publicly and helping a lot of 27 00:02:00,640 --> 00:02:03,760 Speaker 1: people through their own struggles. You know, there's a lot 28 00:02:03,760 --> 00:02:07,360 Speaker 1: of people that really looked up to Shannon, and I 29 00:02:07,480 --> 00:02:08,160 Speaker 1: was one of them. 30 00:02:08,240 --> 00:02:15,679 Speaker 2: So, yeah, it's been about five days, so maybe we 31 00:02:15,760 --> 00:02:19,240 Speaker 2: start with you just have you what how did you 32 00:02:19,320 --> 00:02:20,239 Speaker 2: find out? 33 00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:27,000 Speaker 1: I was on a trip with my husband. We had 34 00:02:27,360 --> 00:02:30,880 Speaker 1: planned a get away to sort of be able to 35 00:02:30,880 --> 00:02:37,280 Speaker 1: spend time together, and I found out while we were away, 36 00:02:37,440 --> 00:02:41,160 Speaker 1: So that definitely sort of changed the tone of that 37 00:02:41,320 --> 00:02:46,560 Speaker 1: trip entirely. And since it happened while I was out 38 00:02:46,560 --> 00:02:52,320 Speaker 1: of town, it didn't feel real somehow. And there's no 39 00:02:52,440 --> 00:02:56,799 Speaker 1: way I would open my Instagram or do any kind 40 00:02:56,880 --> 00:03:01,079 Speaker 1: of looking because it's you know, just kind of everywhere 41 00:03:01,120 --> 00:03:06,239 Speaker 1: and it's just too much. My phone was blowing up 42 00:03:06,280 --> 00:03:11,760 Speaker 1: with like people sending their condolences and which you know, 43 00:03:11,880 --> 00:03:18,200 Speaker 1: of course that is so kind, but it just kept hitting, hitting, hitting, 44 00:03:18,880 --> 00:03:22,080 Speaker 1: And so when I got back to La. When we 45 00:03:22,120 --> 00:03:25,800 Speaker 1: got home, I just wanted to stay home, like I 46 00:03:25,840 --> 00:03:29,919 Speaker 1: just don't want to go anywhere right now. That kind 47 00:03:29,960 --> 00:03:32,960 Speaker 1: of feeling of just needing to like crawl in a 48 00:03:32,960 --> 00:03:36,520 Speaker 1: hole and process this without eyes. 49 00:03:37,480 --> 00:03:41,560 Speaker 2: Yeah, that makes sense. And you know you're describing exactly 50 00:03:41,680 --> 00:03:47,000 Speaker 2: what kind of happens when somebody learns that someone they 51 00:03:47,040 --> 00:03:47,440 Speaker 2: love and. 52 00:03:47,400 --> 00:03:48,200 Speaker 3: Care about dies. 53 00:03:48,800 --> 00:03:51,080 Speaker 2: It's a shock, right, That's kind of the first thing 54 00:03:51,120 --> 00:03:53,520 Speaker 2: that happens, is, yeah, belief and shock. 55 00:03:54,120 --> 00:03:57,040 Speaker 1: Well it's crazy because we all knew she was sick. 56 00:03:58,280 --> 00:04:01,440 Speaker 1: The whole world knew that, you know, And and I 57 00:04:01,440 --> 00:04:03,800 Speaker 1: don't know why, but I just thought she would get better. 58 00:04:03,880 --> 00:04:07,560 Speaker 1: I thought she would kick it. She's, you know, the 59 00:04:07,640 --> 00:04:13,680 Speaker 1: strongest woman around. And I just never thought that this 60 00:04:13,720 --> 00:04:17,720 Speaker 1: would happen. And I had listened to some of her 61 00:04:17,760 --> 00:04:21,640 Speaker 1: podcasts from the previous week, and I knew she was 62 00:04:21,760 --> 00:04:26,279 Speaker 1: kind of undergoing this new chapter in her battle with cancer, 63 00:04:27,279 --> 00:04:32,040 Speaker 1: more chemotherapy, and I could tell she was feeling nervous, 64 00:04:32,279 --> 00:04:34,680 Speaker 1: but I also saw glimmer of hope in her, and 65 00:04:37,520 --> 00:04:39,719 Speaker 1: that just reassured me that everything was going to be okay. 66 00:04:39,800 --> 00:04:42,280 Speaker 1: If she was hopeful, then I could be hopeful too. 67 00:04:43,000 --> 00:04:45,479 Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, I think that's what she was putting 68 00:04:45,520 --> 00:04:47,920 Speaker 2: out in the world, and I think everybody that was 69 00:04:48,040 --> 00:04:52,040 Speaker 2: rooting for her was paying close attention. But I think 70 00:04:52,080 --> 00:04:57,120 Speaker 2: we all felt like, oh, cancer is no match for her, 71 00:04:57,279 --> 00:04:59,800 Speaker 2: Like she just wanted. 72 00:04:59,440 --> 00:05:01,719 Speaker 3: To live, and she made that very clear. 73 00:05:01,560 --> 00:05:05,159 Speaker 2: Over and over again, and so I was totally shocked 74 00:05:05,160 --> 00:05:07,680 Speaker 2: when I heard the news. She felt so alive the 75 00:05:07,760 --> 00:05:10,360 Speaker 2: last several weeks with her podcast and everything that I 76 00:05:10,440 --> 00:05:13,080 Speaker 2: just thought. It just was such a shock, And of 77 00:05:13,120 --> 00:05:16,039 Speaker 2: course I thought about you immediately. I was one of 78 00:05:16,040 --> 00:05:18,039 Speaker 2: the people that blew up your phone at seven am, 79 00:05:18,120 --> 00:05:20,240 Speaker 2: hoping I wasn't the first person. 80 00:05:20,400 --> 00:05:23,080 Speaker 1: You were, and you were the first person I didn't 81 00:05:23,080 --> 00:05:27,440 Speaker 1: see it. Actually, Dave was having his coffee in bed 82 00:05:27,480 --> 00:05:31,120 Speaker 1: and he I came out from the bathroom and he said, 83 00:05:31,160 --> 00:05:34,520 Speaker 1: I need to tell you something. And instantly when he 84 00:05:34,560 --> 00:05:41,120 Speaker 1: says that, I panic just instinctually, and I thought he 85 00:05:41,200 --> 00:05:44,599 Speaker 1: was going to say something about, you know, my dog 86 00:05:44,680 --> 00:05:48,600 Speaker 1: who's elderly, or something like from our family. And then 87 00:05:48,640 --> 00:05:52,560 Speaker 1: he told me that this happened, and I was like, like, 88 00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:55,280 Speaker 1: I literally felt like someone punched me in the stomach. 89 00:05:56,080 --> 00:05:58,640 Speaker 2: I think I feel so protective of you that you know, 90 00:05:58,720 --> 00:06:00,800 Speaker 2: and I'm an early bird. When I saw it, I thought, 91 00:06:00,839 --> 00:06:03,320 Speaker 2: I got to get to Jenny and make sure she's protected. 92 00:06:03,680 --> 00:06:06,520 Speaker 2: And I'm so glad you were with Dave. I'm sure 93 00:06:06,520 --> 00:06:09,320 Speaker 2: it was dizzying to be out of the country. 94 00:06:10,360 --> 00:06:13,800 Speaker 1: Yeah, I was very felt, very weird. I don't know 95 00:06:13,800 --> 00:06:17,240 Speaker 1: how to explain it, and then just flying back into 96 00:06:17,440 --> 00:06:23,239 Speaker 1: La and kind of coming to terms that it was real. 97 00:06:24,600 --> 00:06:26,880 Speaker 1: It was really hard. 98 00:06:33,800 --> 00:06:37,120 Speaker 2: Have you spoken with any of your other nine oh 99 00:06:37,160 --> 00:06:38,960 Speaker 2: two one zero co stars. 100 00:06:39,160 --> 00:06:40,080 Speaker 3: Are you guys. 101 00:06:39,839 --> 00:06:43,680 Speaker 2: Supporting each other and reaching out and if you want 102 00:06:43,720 --> 00:06:44,800 Speaker 2: to share anything. 103 00:06:44,480 --> 00:06:48,359 Speaker 1: About that, Yeah, I mean we've talked about it that 104 00:06:48,440 --> 00:06:52,680 Speaker 1: we have a group chat. Jason of course was the 105 00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:57,400 Speaker 1: first one to reach out to everybody and just you know, 106 00:06:57,600 --> 00:07:03,560 Speaker 1: say I love you guys, and this is insane and 107 00:07:03,839 --> 00:07:07,440 Speaker 1: no more, no more loss, Like this is crazy that 108 00:07:07,440 --> 00:07:10,240 Speaker 1: that I think that's one of the hardest parts for 109 00:07:10,320 --> 00:07:14,880 Speaker 1: me is that it's it's now two three. It's two 110 00:07:15,120 --> 00:07:20,560 Speaker 1: people from our original cast, you know, and of course 111 00:07:21,400 --> 00:07:24,440 Speaker 1: Joey Tada and Paul Wagner and Jessica Klein other people 112 00:07:24,480 --> 00:07:29,240 Speaker 1: have passed away also, But this just was like, you know, 113 00:07:29,280 --> 00:07:31,920 Speaker 1: when you have like a group shot and if you 114 00:07:31,960 --> 00:07:34,800 Speaker 1: can imagine that image of that person in the group 115 00:07:34,800 --> 00:07:40,360 Speaker 1: shot fading away, Yeah, and two like disappear Like it's 116 00:07:40,520 --> 00:07:44,360 Speaker 1: just I can't I can't really wrap my head around it. 117 00:07:45,200 --> 00:07:45,520 Speaker 3: Yeah. 118 00:07:46,400 --> 00:07:49,720 Speaker 2: Yeah, And I'm sure it brought all the feelings back 119 00:07:51,120 --> 00:07:56,760 Speaker 2: about Luke. I know that was an incredibly difficult loss 120 00:07:56,760 --> 00:07:57,040 Speaker 2: for you. 121 00:07:58,800 --> 00:08:01,840 Speaker 3: I was with you that day, as was Dave. 122 00:08:02,920 --> 00:08:08,000 Speaker 2: And watching that loss was Yeah, I'm sure brought it 123 00:08:08,080 --> 00:08:09,119 Speaker 2: all flooding back. 124 00:08:10,000 --> 00:08:16,720 Speaker 1: Definitely. I never I chose to never speak publicly very 125 00:08:16,760 --> 00:08:20,280 Speaker 1: much at all about Luke's passing. Didn't, you know, put 126 00:08:20,360 --> 00:08:23,600 Speaker 1: up a post or anything. I just I didn't know 127 00:08:23,640 --> 00:08:27,520 Speaker 1: how to handle that and I didn't feel compelled to 128 00:08:27,840 --> 00:08:33,040 Speaker 1: let my feelings out there. This one felt, I don't know, 129 00:08:33,480 --> 00:08:37,280 Speaker 1: felt different but the same. So yeah, I mean I 130 00:08:37,320 --> 00:08:41,679 Speaker 1: feel like when grief comes knocking at your door, death 131 00:08:41,760 --> 00:08:45,240 Speaker 1: comes knocking at your door causing grief, Like it's the 132 00:08:45,240 --> 00:08:52,880 Speaker 1: same feeling grief, just however you feel grief individually, it's 133 00:08:52,920 --> 00:08:55,880 Speaker 1: the same feeling. So yeah, it does take you right 134 00:08:55,920 --> 00:09:00,480 Speaker 1: back to that any previous pain or encounter you've had 135 00:09:00,480 --> 00:09:03,480 Speaker 1: with it, just like it was yesterday. 136 00:09:04,480 --> 00:09:07,440 Speaker 2: So it has familiar elements to it that any other 137 00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:10,079 Speaker 2: grief that you've gone through or any other loss that 138 00:09:10,120 --> 00:09:15,040 Speaker 2: you've had, you're right back there feeling that loss too. 139 00:09:15,800 --> 00:09:20,079 Speaker 1: Is that normal? Is that normal to have that same 140 00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:21,840 Speaker 1: feeling about different people? 141 00:09:22,760 --> 00:09:25,320 Speaker 2: Of course, because it is a very like you said 142 00:09:25,320 --> 00:09:29,920 Speaker 2: at the very beginning, it's so unique to each individual 143 00:09:30,480 --> 00:09:33,280 Speaker 2: and wherever you feel it in your body, right, and 144 00:09:33,320 --> 00:09:37,559 Speaker 2: whatever thoughts you have around losing somebody or something that 145 00:09:37,600 --> 00:09:44,559 Speaker 2: you love, whether it's a person, an animal, job, a partnership, 146 00:09:45,440 --> 00:09:47,199 Speaker 2: lives in your body in the same place. 147 00:09:47,240 --> 00:09:48,640 Speaker 3: So you're right back there. 148 00:09:49,320 --> 00:09:52,640 Speaker 2: And if you kind of kept it to yourself or 149 00:09:52,679 --> 00:09:57,520 Speaker 2: locked it away or didn't fully grieve, it's an open 150 00:09:59,000 --> 00:09:59,679 Speaker 2: wound again. 151 00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:03,120 Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't think I've ever fully grieved any loss 152 00:10:03,480 --> 00:10:07,920 Speaker 1: that I've had, So it's like opening up a nasty 153 00:10:08,520 --> 00:10:11,079 Speaker 1: box of feelings. 154 00:10:11,160 --> 00:10:12,280 Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah. 155 00:10:12,480 --> 00:10:15,880 Speaker 2: And you know, a lot of grief experts think that 156 00:10:16,400 --> 00:10:19,400 Speaker 2: the best thing you can do with grief, as painful 157 00:10:19,480 --> 00:10:23,960 Speaker 2: and sorrowful as it is, is to feel it fully right, 158 00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:28,840 Speaker 2: And maybe the gift that Shannon's passing can give you, 159 00:10:28,960 --> 00:10:32,200 Speaker 2: especially because she's kind of known for this too, is 160 00:10:32,280 --> 00:10:35,480 Speaker 2: to really feel the sorrow and lean into it and 161 00:10:35,559 --> 00:10:38,440 Speaker 2: grieve it. Because I know you and I know you 162 00:10:38,520 --> 00:10:42,400 Speaker 2: lock things away and you only allow for as much 163 00:10:42,440 --> 00:10:45,000 Speaker 2: as you think you can allow. But I also know 164 00:10:45,360 --> 00:10:49,559 Speaker 2: as you've evolved and grown, I know you can allow more. 165 00:10:50,360 --> 00:10:53,640 Speaker 2: And maybe this is the time where you let some 166 00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:59,560 Speaker 2: of those other losses that are kind of locked away 167 00:10:59,800 --> 00:11:02,559 Speaker 2: or you know, trapped in your body, that you let 168 00:11:02,559 --> 00:11:05,640 Speaker 2: it go. You don't just cry for Shannon, but you 169 00:11:05,720 --> 00:11:10,560 Speaker 2: cry for your dad and Luke, and I'm you know, 170 00:11:10,640 --> 00:11:14,000 Speaker 2: thinking of other people, Lynn and many dogs that you've lost, 171 00:11:14,120 --> 00:11:16,200 Speaker 2: and you know you've had a lot of You've had 172 00:11:16,200 --> 00:11:17,640 Speaker 2: a lot of loss. 173 00:11:18,280 --> 00:11:24,520 Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean some people haven't experienced loss yet. We 174 00:11:24,600 --> 00:11:28,360 Speaker 1: all will. But like like a real loss like your 175 00:11:28,440 --> 00:11:32,000 Speaker 1: dad or your friend or your mom or something like 176 00:11:32,040 --> 00:11:35,480 Speaker 1: that kind of grief or a child, that kind of grief, 177 00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:41,440 Speaker 1: you cannot understand it even the slightest until you've been 178 00:11:41,520 --> 00:11:46,200 Speaker 1: through it. Right, Like my husband Dave's never lost anybody, 179 00:11:47,480 --> 00:11:52,480 Speaker 1: He's never experienced death. So in a way it's kind 180 00:11:52,520 --> 00:11:56,800 Speaker 1: of hard because he tries his best, of course, to 181 00:11:56,880 --> 00:11:59,320 Speaker 1: like come for me and be there for me, but 182 00:11:59,400 --> 00:12:02,600 Speaker 1: I don't think he fully grasps the depth of it 183 00:12:03,480 --> 00:12:07,200 Speaker 1: and just the way it works, like it'll just come 184 00:12:07,480 --> 00:12:12,160 Speaker 1: up out of nowhere. In the middle of a dinner bite, 185 00:12:12,200 --> 00:12:16,640 Speaker 1: like you never know when you're just gonna basically lose 186 00:12:16,679 --> 00:12:18,880 Speaker 1: it and be sad. 187 00:12:19,640 --> 00:12:22,320 Speaker 2: Right. It ebbs and flows, It comes in waves. It 188 00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:26,480 Speaker 2: is not linear at all. It catches you by surprise, 189 00:12:27,320 --> 00:12:30,439 Speaker 2: you know, and you know you'll be giving Dave a 190 00:12:30,520 --> 00:12:33,000 Speaker 2: gift showing him what it looks like when it comes 191 00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:33,440 Speaker 2: for him. 192 00:12:33,840 --> 00:12:34,920 Speaker 3: Right, and your kids. 193 00:12:37,160 --> 00:12:39,520 Speaker 2: We always talk about modeling when we get together, you know, 194 00:12:39,559 --> 00:12:42,760 Speaker 2: and do this podcast, like what are you modeling for people? 195 00:12:44,080 --> 00:12:46,800 Speaker 2: But any way that you can sort of let the 196 00:12:46,880 --> 00:12:51,360 Speaker 2: sorrow in and lean into it, they say that that 197 00:12:51,520 --> 00:12:54,199 Speaker 2: also allows you to feel the greatest joy too, because 198 00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:57,000 Speaker 2: if you're feeling two sides of the same coin and 199 00:12:57,120 --> 00:13:00,000 Speaker 2: you're allowing for both, it can be a continuum or whatever, 200 00:13:00,120 --> 00:13:03,320 Speaker 2: or that you you're also giving yourself a gift of 201 00:13:03,320 --> 00:13:09,320 Speaker 2: feeling deeply on both sides of the continuum and you 202 00:13:09,360 --> 00:13:10,040 Speaker 2: can handle it. 203 00:13:11,760 --> 00:13:17,640 Speaker 1: Yeah. I have learned more about just letting feelings pass, 204 00:13:17,720 --> 00:13:24,080 Speaker 1: you know, and honoring them and reminding myself when I 205 00:13:24,120 --> 00:13:27,440 Speaker 1: am feeling any kind of certain way that it's just 206 00:13:27,480 --> 00:13:31,480 Speaker 1: a feeling and it will pass. And I you know, 207 00:13:31,679 --> 00:13:34,720 Speaker 1: I talk to my little self inside and I say 208 00:13:35,320 --> 00:13:38,360 Speaker 1: it's okay. You know I'm here for you. You got this, 209 00:13:38,520 --> 00:13:41,400 Speaker 1: You're gonna be okay. I know it hurts right now, 210 00:13:42,440 --> 00:13:45,240 Speaker 1: but it's going to get better. I know that. When 211 00:13:45,760 --> 00:13:51,640 Speaker 1: my dad passed away, people would say to me, time 212 00:13:51,720 --> 00:13:55,520 Speaker 1: will heal honey, time will fix it, and I was like, 213 00:13:56,400 --> 00:14:01,960 Speaker 1: f you. You know, time will never make this feel better. Yeah, 214 00:14:02,440 --> 00:14:05,120 Speaker 1: And it really made me mad when people would say that. 215 00:14:06,200 --> 00:14:10,959 Speaker 1: And I realize, of course now I don't even know 216 00:14:11,040 --> 00:14:14,760 Speaker 1: how many years later, twelve years later from my dad's passing, 217 00:14:14,840 --> 00:14:20,640 Speaker 1: that it does dissipate, like the emotions that raw feelings 218 00:14:20,640 --> 00:14:23,880 Speaker 1: of emotions that you go through right away, and that 219 00:14:23,920 --> 00:14:26,120 Speaker 1: I'm still going through, and I know so many people 220 00:14:26,200 --> 00:14:30,200 Speaker 1: are still going through. They do dissipate. And it's not 221 00:14:31,560 --> 00:14:35,280 Speaker 1: it's not that you're forgetting that person or you're like 222 00:14:35,520 --> 00:14:37,920 Speaker 1: moved on to something else, because it does live in 223 00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:43,160 Speaker 1: you forever. It's just that you have find found some 224 00:14:43,240 --> 00:14:46,360 Speaker 1: way to comfort yourself through it and accept it and 225 00:14:46,360 --> 00:14:50,640 Speaker 1: honor it and move forward with your life because that's 226 00:14:51,040 --> 00:14:51,960 Speaker 1: what you have to do. 227 00:14:52,640 --> 00:14:53,280 Speaker 3: Yeah. 228 00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:56,000 Speaker 2: I heard I heard a beautiful description the other day 229 00:14:56,120 --> 00:14:58,560 Speaker 2: in a podcast, and I wish I could give credit, 230 00:14:58,560 --> 00:15:01,600 Speaker 2: but I don't remember who said it, but that grief 231 00:15:01,720 --> 00:15:04,080 Speaker 2: is like a heavy stone in your pocket and. 232 00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:05,360 Speaker 3: You're very aware of it. 233 00:15:05,440 --> 00:15:08,280 Speaker 2: You feel that heavy stone and it weighs you down, 234 00:15:08,320 --> 00:15:13,120 Speaker 2: and you feel it every day. And as time goes 235 00:15:13,200 --> 00:15:18,880 Speaker 2: on and you get stronger, the stone gets lighter. Right, 236 00:15:18,960 --> 00:15:21,480 Speaker 2: So you don't feel it as often, it's not as 237 00:15:21,520 --> 00:15:24,560 Speaker 2: ever present, but it's always in your pocket. You never 238 00:15:24,600 --> 00:15:32,240 Speaker 2: forget about it. But your strength and courage and kind 239 00:15:32,240 --> 00:15:36,560 Speaker 2: of integration of the loss allows for the stone and 240 00:15:36,600 --> 00:15:40,160 Speaker 2: the heaviness and weight of it to get lighter. 241 00:15:42,320 --> 00:15:46,200 Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel that. I know that from dealing with 242 00:15:46,280 --> 00:15:50,480 Speaker 1: it so many times. Yeah, you think in the moment 243 00:15:50,520 --> 00:15:54,920 Speaker 1: you're going to break, you know. And I know with Shannon, 244 00:15:55,240 --> 00:15:59,120 Speaker 1: I was shocked, and then I was pissed at myself 245 00:15:59,120 --> 00:15:59,960 Speaker 1: for being shocked. 246 00:16:01,600 --> 00:16:08,400 Speaker 3: I was like so mad, you know. 247 00:16:08,640 --> 00:16:14,920 Speaker 1: I was bargaining and saying why her, Like why not me? 248 00:16:15,280 --> 00:16:21,440 Speaker 1: And I know I don't know anything actually, but there 249 00:16:21,440 --> 00:16:27,680 Speaker 1: were so many feelings. I was angry, angry at her circumstances, 250 00:16:27,720 --> 00:16:32,200 Speaker 1: at cancer, at the world for taking you know, her 251 00:16:33,080 --> 00:16:37,360 Speaker 1: away from her mom. 252 00:16:37,440 --> 00:16:38,320 Speaker 3: Yeah, and. 253 00:16:40,040 --> 00:16:43,960 Speaker 1: Her family and her dog. She loved Bowie so much. 254 00:16:45,000 --> 00:16:46,640 Speaker 1: Oh sorry, I don't want to cry. 255 00:16:47,960 --> 00:16:48,880 Speaker 3: And just the world. 256 00:16:49,000 --> 00:16:52,800 Speaker 1: Like all of our nine O two one oh family, 257 00:16:54,720 --> 00:17:00,200 Speaker 1: there's been this crazy division in some of the fans 258 00:17:00,640 --> 00:17:04,679 Speaker 1: that they were either team Kelly or they were team Brenda. 259 00:17:05,800 --> 00:17:10,960 Speaker 1: And I don't think that either Shannon or I ever 260 00:17:11,160 --> 00:17:15,040 Speaker 1: wanted that, So I you know, even though if you 261 00:17:15,080 --> 00:17:19,159 Speaker 1: were team Brenda or whatever, I know you're hurting just 262 00:17:19,200 --> 00:17:23,040 Speaker 1: the same everybody is hurting, and there's just you know, 263 00:17:23,119 --> 00:17:25,400 Speaker 1: it's a time when we can all come together and 264 00:17:25,440 --> 00:17:30,119 Speaker 1: process this all with each other. So that is my hope. 265 00:17:30,520 --> 00:17:33,200 Speaker 2: And maybe in that once and for all in that 266 00:17:33,400 --> 00:17:36,840 Speaker 2: you know, binary choice or that divisiveness, because you and 267 00:17:36,880 --> 00:17:40,240 Speaker 2: Shannon never wanted that, and people get so wrapped up 268 00:17:40,240 --> 00:17:43,679 Speaker 2: in TV shows and I understand, but to think that 269 00:17:43,800 --> 00:17:46,000 Speaker 2: it's it was so black and white, or that they 270 00:17:46,320 --> 00:17:49,920 Speaker 2: understand the story or the friendship between you and Shannon 271 00:17:50,040 --> 00:17:52,760 Speaker 2: and what worked and what was complicated and the love 272 00:17:52,840 --> 00:17:55,600 Speaker 2: that was there and the experiences that you and Shannon 273 00:17:55,680 --> 00:17:59,840 Speaker 2: had are nobody else's but your own. So you know, 274 00:18:00,040 --> 00:18:04,960 Speaker 2: I would just say, let's hope that everybody can kind 275 00:18:05,000 --> 00:18:08,480 Speaker 2: of release that once and for all. I wanted to 276 00:18:08,520 --> 00:18:11,359 Speaker 2: bring something up that you, I mean, you basically talked 277 00:18:11,400 --> 00:18:16,040 Speaker 2: about you cycled through the Elizabeth Koobler Ross stages of 278 00:18:16,080 --> 00:18:25,480 Speaker 2: grief in a matter of moments, right, you know that denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance, 279 00:18:25,600 --> 00:18:30,080 Speaker 2: and they come and go again like quickly over time, 280 00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:34,120 Speaker 2: and all of it is okay. Because when I heard 281 00:18:34,119 --> 00:18:36,760 Speaker 2: you say you were mad at yourself for I think 282 00:18:36,800 --> 00:18:41,200 Speaker 2: being angry, I just want to say to you two. 283 00:18:41,000 --> 00:18:42,480 Speaker 3: Things in grief. 284 00:18:43,359 --> 00:18:46,280 Speaker 2: The most important thing that I can impart to you 285 00:18:46,359 --> 00:18:51,320 Speaker 2: and to people listening, everything is okay in grief, meaning 286 00:18:52,040 --> 00:18:54,119 Speaker 2: whatever it looks like for you, whatever it looks like 287 00:18:54,160 --> 00:19:00,560 Speaker 2: for anybody that's listening, all is okay. Shutting down irritability, anger, 288 00:19:01,200 --> 00:19:04,399 Speaker 2: if you feel guilty, that's a really common thing, and 289 00:19:04,440 --> 00:19:06,359 Speaker 2: that you have to be the most important thing is 290 00:19:06,359 --> 00:19:09,560 Speaker 2: you have to be gentle on yourself. We do so 291 00:19:09,760 --> 00:19:13,120 Speaker 2: much self recrimination, we do so much beating ourselves up, 292 00:19:13,800 --> 00:19:16,639 Speaker 2: and so that's the second thing, is gentle on yourself 293 00:19:16,800 --> 00:19:19,960 Speaker 2: except all and also not just for you, but anybody 294 00:19:19,960 --> 00:19:24,000 Speaker 2: else that's grieving, how they do it is also okay. 295 00:19:25,560 --> 00:19:29,160 Speaker 2: So you give space for yourself and others, and gentleness 296 00:19:29,240 --> 00:19:30,200 Speaker 2: and grace. 297 00:19:31,800 --> 00:19:32,640 Speaker 3: For yourself and. 298 00:19:32,680 --> 00:19:38,000 Speaker 2: Others, because all is okay during grief. Any kind of behavior, 299 00:19:38,200 --> 00:19:39,680 Speaker 2: acting out, shutting down. 300 00:19:41,320 --> 00:19:45,000 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I think that that's important. I hope everybody 301 00:19:45,040 --> 00:19:51,240 Speaker 1: really hears that, that you're grieving, Like, even if you 302 00:19:51,720 --> 00:19:56,480 Speaker 1: weren't friends with Shannon, or you know, weren't in my 303 00:19:56,600 --> 00:20:03,280 Speaker 1: position or any of our positions, you her and it's 304 00:20:03,320 --> 00:20:08,200 Speaker 1: a loss for anybody who loved any part of her. 305 00:20:08,359 --> 00:20:11,359 Speaker 1: So I hope that people really hear that and are 306 00:20:11,440 --> 00:20:16,800 Speaker 1: gentle on themselves and honor their grief, because, like you're saying, 307 00:20:16,840 --> 00:20:19,040 Speaker 1: that's the only way to get through it. You can't 308 00:20:19,080 --> 00:20:20,119 Speaker 1: go around it. 309 00:20:20,640 --> 00:20:24,359 Speaker 2: Yeah, when talking about Shannon, like, what do you think, so, 310 00:20:24,440 --> 00:20:25,919 Speaker 2: I know you've been thinking about her a lot. What 311 00:20:25,920 --> 00:20:30,120 Speaker 2: do you think you'll remember most about her? 312 00:20:31,280 --> 00:20:34,480 Speaker 1: I will remember the respect that I have for her, 313 00:20:35,320 --> 00:20:42,119 Speaker 1: always had for her, in her willingness to voice her 314 00:20:42,440 --> 00:20:46,040 Speaker 1: opinions on things, stand up for people that needed to 315 00:20:46,040 --> 00:20:49,520 Speaker 1: be stood up for that couldn't do them do it themselves. 316 00:20:51,920 --> 00:20:55,080 Speaker 1: I will admire that's so her bravery. 317 00:20:55,400 --> 00:20:57,920 Speaker 3: And she was. 318 00:20:59,480 --> 00:21:05,639 Speaker 1: One of the most generous people I know. She was 319 00:21:06,680 --> 00:21:15,200 Speaker 1: really kind and generous and strong, and sometimes her strength 320 00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:22,400 Speaker 1: got in her way and didn't look the way other 321 00:21:22,440 --> 00:21:26,880 Speaker 1: people wanted it to look. But she didn't care she 322 00:21:27,520 --> 00:21:31,320 Speaker 1: was strong anyway, because I think she had to be. 323 00:21:31,440 --> 00:21:37,440 Speaker 1: I know, we have very similar upbringings and stories about 324 00:21:37,440 --> 00:21:43,240 Speaker 1: our dads and are just deep, deep connections with our fathers. 325 00:21:43,400 --> 00:21:46,400 Speaker 1: And then how her dad and my dad both got 326 00:21:46,440 --> 00:21:49,720 Speaker 1: sick when we were young and we did everything in 327 00:21:49,760 --> 00:21:53,800 Speaker 1: our power to keep them alive as long as possible, 328 00:21:54,680 --> 00:22:01,800 Speaker 1: and that was a lot of pressure and wait to 329 00:22:01,920 --> 00:22:07,200 Speaker 1: put on our shoulders at you know, as teenagers basically yeah, 330 00:22:07,240 --> 00:22:11,520 Speaker 1: and so we both shared that, I want to say 331 00:22:12,800 --> 00:22:17,679 Speaker 1: burden because it was very difficult, and I was thinking, like, 332 00:22:19,160 --> 00:22:23,080 Speaker 1: you know, Shannon was a fighter. She was always a fighter, 333 00:22:23,080 --> 00:22:29,240 Speaker 1: though it wasn't just because of one thing or or 334 00:22:29,280 --> 00:22:33,560 Speaker 1: things that weren't significant. She fought four things that mattered 335 00:22:33,600 --> 00:22:38,600 Speaker 1: to her and people that mattered to her. And I 336 00:22:38,640 --> 00:22:44,080 Speaker 1: loved laughing with Shannon, like we could have a good 337 00:22:44,160 --> 00:22:48,280 Speaker 1: session of just like uncontrollable laughing. And she was funny. 338 00:22:48,359 --> 00:22:53,520 Speaker 1: And I will probably miss the most just hearing her 339 00:22:53,560 --> 00:23:00,800 Speaker 1: say my name because she she always said Ginny it 340 00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:05,320 Speaker 1: like from the South, Yeah, And I never corrected her. 341 00:23:05,400 --> 00:23:07,360 Speaker 1: It's just the way she said it, and I loved it. 342 00:23:10,119 --> 00:23:13,000 Speaker 2: Do you have a favorite memory or story with her, 343 00:23:13,119 --> 00:23:14,760 Speaker 2: like one of your favorite funny times. 344 00:23:15,520 --> 00:23:21,160 Speaker 1: Oh my god, we could get really mischievous together. Her 345 00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:27,560 Speaker 1: I very very strong independent girls and women. I loved 346 00:23:27,600 --> 00:23:31,359 Speaker 1: when we were being mischievous or honery or just a 347 00:23:31,359 --> 00:23:35,119 Speaker 1: little devilish, like, you know, not to the point of 348 00:23:36,200 --> 00:23:39,440 Speaker 1: bad things happening, but just for a little fun. And 349 00:23:40,680 --> 00:23:43,879 Speaker 1: one of the last like main memories I have is 350 00:23:43,920 --> 00:23:47,199 Speaker 1: going several years back now, was going to Vegas to 351 00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:54,840 Speaker 1: see Ian, our friend Ian in Chippendale's right. So we 352 00:23:54,960 --> 00:24:00,560 Speaker 1: flew together to see him, and we supported him, and 353 00:24:00,600 --> 00:24:03,359 Speaker 1: we just laughed so hard, and she thought it was 354 00:24:03,480 --> 00:24:06,640 Speaker 1: so funny when they pulled me up on stage and 355 00:24:06,840 --> 00:24:12,719 Speaker 1: you know, did a public lap dance. So we had 356 00:24:12,760 --> 00:24:18,400 Speaker 1: a really great time on that trip. Yeah, And I 357 00:24:18,440 --> 00:24:24,200 Speaker 1: also keep like remembering the last word that she said 358 00:24:24,200 --> 00:24:29,240 Speaker 1: to me. It was just an example of even though 359 00:24:29,280 --> 00:24:35,000 Speaker 1: our relationship was complicated at times, or was convoluted at 360 00:24:35,040 --> 00:24:39,600 Speaker 1: times by outside forces that just sort of crept in 361 00:24:40,480 --> 00:24:44,679 Speaker 1: for us both, we still loved each other. And it 362 00:24:44,720 --> 00:24:49,520 Speaker 1: was after our last time together at maybe nineties gone. Anyway, 363 00:24:49,760 --> 00:24:53,240 Speaker 1: she had to get right back to la and she 364 00:24:53,440 --> 00:24:57,040 Speaker 1: was taking her i think her friend's private plane, and 365 00:24:57,080 --> 00:25:00,680 Speaker 1: she had offered everybody that need to get back to 366 00:25:00,840 --> 00:25:03,120 Speaker 1: La or even Jason, who had to go to Nashville, 367 00:25:03,200 --> 00:25:05,080 Speaker 1: get on the plane and we can all go together. 368 00:25:05,720 --> 00:25:08,879 Speaker 1: And no one asked me, and I was feeling a 369 00:25:08,920 --> 00:25:14,520 Speaker 1: little like ouch just from being not asked, or I 370 00:25:14,560 --> 00:25:17,520 Speaker 1: don't know why. I didn't even have to go back 371 00:25:17,520 --> 00:25:19,040 Speaker 1: to LA, I had to go to the opposite direction 372 00:25:19,119 --> 00:25:23,000 Speaker 1: to New York. But she came up to me right 373 00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:25,359 Speaker 1: before they left, and she was like, we're going on 374 00:25:25,520 --> 00:25:31,040 Speaker 1: this plane. You're welcome to come with us, Jinny, and 375 00:25:31,760 --> 00:25:36,080 Speaker 1: I can see her saying it, and that just keeps 376 00:25:36,080 --> 00:25:37,560 Speaker 1: playing over and over in my mind. 377 00:25:38,680 --> 00:25:41,840 Speaker 3: Her generosity. I hear that a lot. 378 00:25:43,119 --> 00:25:46,479 Speaker 2: Something that's so remarkable to me is the way you 379 00:25:46,520 --> 00:25:48,320 Speaker 2: talk about her and the way you describe her. And 380 00:25:48,359 --> 00:25:50,600 Speaker 2: I met her but way back in the day when 381 00:25:50,640 --> 00:25:52,520 Speaker 2: you were doing one two one O, Like I was 382 00:25:52,520 --> 00:25:54,600 Speaker 2: there on set with you guys, but I hadn't seen 383 00:25:54,640 --> 00:25:59,760 Speaker 2: her in all the decades ensuing decades. But the way 384 00:25:59,800 --> 00:26:03,320 Speaker 2: you talk about her and describe her is so similar 385 00:26:03,400 --> 00:26:08,200 Speaker 2: to who you are in so many ways, fighter, strong, 386 00:26:08,680 --> 00:26:13,320 Speaker 2: standing up for people, mischievous and funny, like there are 387 00:26:13,400 --> 00:26:15,000 Speaker 2: so many similarities. 388 00:26:15,080 --> 00:26:18,600 Speaker 3: And the way that you grew up with your dad's. 389 00:26:18,400 --> 00:26:22,280 Speaker 2: And I can see why you bonded, but it just 390 00:26:22,359 --> 00:26:24,359 Speaker 2: hit me for the first time in all these decades, 391 00:26:24,920 --> 00:26:26,720 Speaker 2: how actually similar you are. 392 00:26:27,280 --> 00:26:32,680 Speaker 1: That's true, it really is. We're both strong, independent, not 393 00:26:32,760 --> 00:26:37,720 Speaker 1: necessarily by our own decisions. Yeah, and are both aries, 394 00:26:39,480 --> 00:26:42,040 Speaker 1: you know, and that's a whole thing in itself. 395 00:26:42,840 --> 00:26:44,119 Speaker 3: Yeah. 396 00:26:44,160 --> 00:26:47,760 Speaker 1: But yeah, I don't think anybody ever realized how similar 397 00:26:48,000 --> 00:26:50,840 Speaker 1: we actually were. And I think that people that just 398 00:26:51,000 --> 00:26:56,000 Speaker 1: met Shannon, you know, quickly or you know, they didn't 399 00:26:56,040 --> 00:26:59,200 Speaker 1: get to know her the way that I had the 400 00:26:59,240 --> 00:27:02,160 Speaker 1: privilege of getting to know her and the rest of 401 00:27:02,400 --> 00:27:10,000 Speaker 1: the cast to get to know her was to love her. Yeah, definitely, 402 00:27:17,280 --> 00:27:22,040 Speaker 1: it's been a tough week. I know that it'll feel 403 00:27:22,080 --> 00:27:26,720 Speaker 1: better over time. I encourage everybody to believe me on that. 404 00:27:28,400 --> 00:27:31,960 Speaker 1: It's just also really hard when you know, and this 405 00:27:32,160 --> 00:27:36,440 Speaker 1: was with Luke too, Like when someone famous dies, you're 406 00:27:36,600 --> 00:27:41,800 Speaker 1: there's just so many reminders, visual reminders, whether it's on 407 00:27:42,000 --> 00:27:47,200 Speaker 1: your feed or on the news, or on your for 408 00:27:47,440 --> 00:27:53,560 Speaker 1: you page or old cast photos like the you know, 409 00:27:53,640 --> 00:27:58,199 Speaker 1: when it's really really hard to sign cast photos and 410 00:27:58,320 --> 00:28:02,480 Speaker 1: see Luke not there, and now to have to sign 411 00:28:03,200 --> 00:28:08,160 Speaker 1: those photos without Shannon there, it's just like inconceivable. That's 412 00:28:08,200 --> 00:28:10,720 Speaker 1: the part that's like I don't want to believe it. 413 00:28:11,000 --> 00:28:15,960 Speaker 1: Like and I there are times when I still refuse 414 00:28:16,040 --> 00:28:17,280 Speaker 1: to believe that Luke is gone. 415 00:28:17,640 --> 00:28:19,800 Speaker 2: Well, I think he's here right now in that light 416 00:28:20,040 --> 00:28:21,399 Speaker 2: that's shining behind you. 417 00:28:23,040 --> 00:28:26,159 Speaker 1: Yeah, it's weird. There's a light shining right on my 418 00:28:26,320 --> 00:28:27,800 Speaker 1: head like a ray. 419 00:28:28,480 --> 00:28:29,760 Speaker 2: I know he's with you a lot. 420 00:28:30,359 --> 00:28:33,119 Speaker 1: He is with me a lot. And you know, he 421 00:28:33,240 --> 00:28:36,280 Speaker 1: was the first person I thought of when I heard 422 00:28:36,320 --> 00:28:41,200 Speaker 1: the news, and I thought how happy he was going 423 00:28:41,320 --> 00:28:43,960 Speaker 1: to be to be. 424 00:28:44,000 --> 00:28:44,600 Speaker 3: With her again. 425 00:28:44,680 --> 00:28:48,160 Speaker 1: Like whatever your beliefs are about heaven and hell and 426 00:28:48,200 --> 00:28:52,680 Speaker 1: transitioning or spirits all the things, like whatever it is 427 00:28:52,800 --> 00:28:57,719 Speaker 1: for me personally, I feel the spirits of the people 428 00:28:57,800 --> 00:29:02,040 Speaker 1: that I love the most if they die or crossover 429 00:29:02,160 --> 00:29:05,680 Speaker 1: or whatever you want to call it, I feel them 430 00:29:05,960 --> 00:29:09,959 Speaker 1: so much. And I turned to Luke all the time 431 00:29:11,160 --> 00:29:15,080 Speaker 1: for help, you know, like in dealing with certain things 432 00:29:15,440 --> 00:29:21,760 Speaker 1: or making decisions. I asked him, and I just I 433 00:29:21,840 --> 00:29:25,920 Speaker 1: get pretty strong answers from him because he was very 434 00:29:25,920 --> 00:29:30,320 Speaker 1: opinionated on the things that I had going on in 435 00:29:30,360 --> 00:29:35,080 Speaker 1: my life. But I just know he it's gonna sound 436 00:29:35,240 --> 00:29:40,720 Speaker 1: very weird, but he definitely was there to catch her, 437 00:29:41,560 --> 00:29:46,240 Speaker 1: and I knew he would be, but I know he was. 438 00:29:47,160 --> 00:29:48,800 Speaker 3: Yeah, And he was like that for you in your 439 00:29:48,840 --> 00:29:49,360 Speaker 3: life too. 440 00:29:49,400 --> 00:29:52,360 Speaker 2: He was somebody that you turned to and you know, 441 00:29:52,800 --> 00:29:56,000 Speaker 2: took his consult and wanted his opinion on things, and 442 00:29:56,040 --> 00:29:59,640 Speaker 2: he had no problem giving them to And so I 443 00:29:59,640 --> 00:30:02,280 Speaker 2: think it's a beautiful example that you're sharing that you 444 00:30:02,400 --> 00:30:06,640 Speaker 2: still get that even though he's not here physically anymore, 445 00:30:07,240 --> 00:30:09,320 Speaker 2: you absolutely still get that. 446 00:30:09,680 --> 00:30:12,920 Speaker 1: Yeah, I didn't believe it. I didn't believe it until 447 00:30:12,960 --> 00:30:14,040 Speaker 1: I believed it, like. 448 00:30:15,480 --> 00:30:15,920 Speaker 3: I want. 449 00:30:16,160 --> 00:30:19,440 Speaker 1: For a long time, I called myself agnostic, like I 450 00:30:19,480 --> 00:30:21,600 Speaker 1: didn't believe in anything. I didn't know, I didn't have 451 00:30:21,640 --> 00:30:25,640 Speaker 1: any faith, and I was okay with that. I survived 452 00:30:25,680 --> 00:30:28,400 Speaker 1: a long time without it. And now they've gotten older, 453 00:30:29,160 --> 00:30:35,480 Speaker 1: you know, you look at things like that, and I 454 00:30:35,640 --> 00:30:42,200 Speaker 1: just started believing having faith in that. I call them 455 00:30:42,240 --> 00:30:46,960 Speaker 1: my angels, my spirits, my loved ones that I have 456 00:30:47,520 --> 00:30:51,800 Speaker 1: passed away. I still feel them with me and I 457 00:30:51,840 --> 00:30:57,360 Speaker 1: can literally this is the weirdest thing too, Like in 458 00:30:57,440 --> 00:31:02,000 Speaker 1: a way, when Luke was alive or Shannon was alive, 459 00:31:02,680 --> 00:31:07,000 Speaker 1: I felt like that relationship was diluted because it was 460 00:31:07,000 --> 00:31:10,800 Speaker 1: shared by so many. I think I sometimes felt like 461 00:31:11,680 --> 00:31:15,000 Speaker 1: I didn't have as much of their attention or time 462 00:31:15,680 --> 00:31:20,280 Speaker 1: or as close a relationship as I wanted. But I 463 00:31:20,360 --> 00:31:23,720 Speaker 1: found with Luke and with my Dad that I have 464 00:31:23,800 --> 00:31:29,120 Speaker 1: them all the time now, Like I'm closer Luke than 465 00:31:29,160 --> 00:31:31,200 Speaker 1: I ever was, and I'm closer to my Dad than 466 00:31:31,200 --> 00:31:33,360 Speaker 1: I ever was, because they're always with me and I 467 00:31:33,400 --> 00:31:37,320 Speaker 1: can always turn to them and ask them. And I 468 00:31:37,360 --> 00:31:39,840 Speaker 1: hope that people can can feel that way. 469 00:31:40,560 --> 00:31:42,800 Speaker 3: With Shannon, that's really hopeful. 470 00:31:43,480 --> 00:31:46,000 Speaker 2: I want to say something to you and to everyone 471 00:31:46,040 --> 00:31:51,840 Speaker 2: who's listening, which is grief isn't just one thing. It 472 00:31:51,960 --> 00:31:58,320 Speaker 2: is a process, okay, and again, let it come and 473 00:31:58,400 --> 00:32:02,560 Speaker 2: go as it does. And if you know you or 474 00:32:02,600 --> 00:32:06,880 Speaker 2: anybody that's listening needs extra support, let's make sure to 475 00:32:07,000 --> 00:32:08,480 Speaker 2: leave some resources. 476 00:32:09,080 --> 00:32:10,760 Speaker 3: Yes, let's do that. 477 00:32:10,920 --> 00:32:15,920 Speaker 1: We'll leave resources in the show notes. And well, if 478 00:32:15,960 --> 00:32:19,120 Speaker 1: anybody needs help getting through this or dealing with this 479 00:32:19,280 --> 00:32:25,719 Speaker 1: grief or any grief, reach out to a professional, because 480 00:32:25,760 --> 00:32:29,600 Speaker 1: it really does sort of smooth the rough edges of 481 00:32:29,640 --> 00:32:34,440 Speaker 1: the whole experience, and it gives you, like some outside 482 00:32:34,480 --> 00:32:38,960 Speaker 1: perspective and some insight that you don't have when you're 483 00:32:39,480 --> 00:32:43,880 Speaker 1: feeling all these intense feelings so I hope that people 484 00:32:43,880 --> 00:32:46,000 Speaker 1: will check out those resources that we're going to leave 485 00:32:46,040 --> 00:32:50,120 Speaker 1: for you in the show notes. And I guess you 486 00:32:50,160 --> 00:32:55,760 Speaker 1: know it is what it is like. You can't change it, 487 00:32:56,800 --> 00:32:59,719 Speaker 1: even though you want to. You have to accept it 488 00:33:00,560 --> 00:33:02,360 Speaker 1: and move forward. 489 00:33:02,840 --> 00:33:05,120 Speaker 2: Yeah, don't force it. I'm so glad you wanted to 490 00:33:05,120 --> 00:33:07,080 Speaker 2: be of service because this was a hard thing to do. 491 00:33:07,280 --> 00:33:10,760 Speaker 2: I'm glad you wanted to do it for fans of 492 00:33:10,800 --> 00:33:14,560 Speaker 2: the show, other people who are grieving. I'm really touched 493 00:33:14,560 --> 00:33:15,440 Speaker 2: that you asked me to. 494 00:33:15,440 --> 00:33:18,960 Speaker 3: Do this with you always, thank you. I love you 495 00:33:19,040 --> 00:33:23,000 Speaker 3: so much. Yeah, thanks, thanks for doing. 496 00:33:22,840 --> 00:33:27,640 Speaker 1: This, Thank you, and thanks everybody for being here with 497 00:33:27,680 --> 00:33:34,040 Speaker 1: me today. And I will be back soon. Bye bye.