1 00:00:00,680 --> 00:00:08,440 Speaker 1: Hello, and welcome to your Chelsea featuring Chelsea Handler and Brandon. Hello. Hi, Hi, sweetheart. 2 00:00:08,720 --> 00:00:15,480 Speaker 1: How's your day going? Not pretty annoyed today? That's okay. 3 00:00:15,760 --> 00:00:18,520 Speaker 1: You have a lot of reasons to be annoyed on. 4 00:00:18,760 --> 00:00:20,439 Speaker 1: There is a lot going on, Brandon, There's been a 5 00:00:20,440 --> 00:00:23,040 Speaker 1: lot happening to you recently. So let's it's okay to 6 00:00:23,040 --> 00:00:25,160 Speaker 1: be in a bad mood. Just accept it, and I'm 7 00:00:25,160 --> 00:00:28,240 Speaker 1: acknowledging it. Acknowledging it. No that it will pass. You're 8 00:00:28,240 --> 00:00:30,080 Speaker 1: going to have a rough day and it will be 9 00:00:30,080 --> 00:00:32,680 Speaker 1: gone tomorrow most likely. And you've had a rough week. 10 00:00:32,840 --> 00:00:35,840 Speaker 1: You know who else is having a rough time? Alex Rodriguez, 11 00:00:35,880 --> 00:00:37,720 Speaker 1: did you hear about somebody took a picture of him 12 00:00:37,760 --> 00:00:40,400 Speaker 1: taking a shed be in his apartment and then decided 13 00:00:40,440 --> 00:00:43,080 Speaker 1: to post it all over the internet. I was not aware, 14 00:00:43,120 --> 00:00:45,040 Speaker 1: but I'm sure that's a welcome distraction from miss Jennifer 15 00:00:45,040 --> 00:00:48,080 Speaker 1: Lopez News. I would say that that is a terrible 16 00:00:48,120 --> 00:00:50,879 Speaker 1: thing to do to another person, like who took that 17 00:00:50,960 --> 00:00:54,160 Speaker 1: photo and then posted it? Like, honestly, you know, our 18 00:00:54,160 --> 00:00:57,560 Speaker 1: society is so fucked up. But I would say that 19 00:00:57,920 --> 00:01:00,760 Speaker 1: if that were to happen to somebody, if it had 20 00:01:00,800 --> 00:01:04,200 Speaker 1: to happen to somebody, I think it should be Alex Rodriguez. 21 00:01:04,200 --> 00:01:06,640 Speaker 1: He's probably thrilled that this is the new headline and 22 00:01:06,720 --> 00:01:09,760 Speaker 1: not him and Jennifer Lopez. Jennifer Lopez hanging out with 23 00:01:09,800 --> 00:01:12,360 Speaker 1: Ben Affleck. Yeah, well, I'm sure he's not thrilled about that. 24 00:01:12,480 --> 00:01:15,160 Speaker 1: But I'm sure he's not thrilled about hearing rumors about 25 00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:20,119 Speaker 1: his ex girl. What were they married? They were engaged? Yes, yes, 26 00:01:20,319 --> 00:01:23,319 Speaker 1: I just don't care for him. I feel the same 27 00:01:23,360 --> 00:01:26,560 Speaker 1: way about Alex Rodriguez. I find him very off putting, 28 00:01:26,840 --> 00:01:29,399 Speaker 1: and I don't know why so many women are so 29 00:01:29,520 --> 00:01:32,399 Speaker 1: into him. I don't like his body shape, I don't 30 00:01:32,480 --> 00:01:34,880 Speaker 1: like his demeanor. I'm glad you said that about his 31 00:01:34,880 --> 00:01:36,959 Speaker 1: body shape because I also don't like it, and I 32 00:01:36,959 --> 00:01:39,640 Speaker 1: don't know why. But I've met him once and I 33 00:01:39,680 --> 00:01:42,360 Speaker 1: was picked out when I met him, and I'm still 34 00:01:42,360 --> 00:01:44,280 Speaker 1: picked out by him even I just don't understand a 35 00:01:44,280 --> 00:01:48,320 Speaker 1: lot of Jennifer Lopez's choices romantically, though they never make 36 00:01:48,400 --> 00:01:54,280 Speaker 1: sense to me really, her and Mark Anthony, you know 37 00:01:54,280 --> 00:01:56,200 Speaker 1: what I mean. It's like there's a trend here that 38 00:01:56,280 --> 00:01:59,320 Speaker 1: she's dating people that are one not in her league 39 00:01:59,360 --> 00:02:03,440 Speaker 1: and two obviously not a romantic match. Yeah, I don't 40 00:02:03,520 --> 00:02:06,320 Speaker 1: understand the rebounding. I don't understand, like when you break 41 00:02:06,400 --> 00:02:08,600 Speaker 1: up having sex with your ex boyfriend, Like I don't 42 00:02:08,600 --> 00:02:12,560 Speaker 1: get that, Like why two weeks without having sex and 43 00:02:12,600 --> 00:02:15,880 Speaker 1: then contact Your and Ben Affleck have both said individually 44 00:02:15,880 --> 00:02:18,520 Speaker 1: in interviews that they are the ones that got away, 45 00:02:18,560 --> 00:02:20,160 Speaker 1: And sometimes I think that can't happen, that you're just 46 00:02:20,200 --> 00:02:23,280 Speaker 1: going through a life circumstance where it's not going to 47 00:02:23,360 --> 00:02:25,960 Speaker 1: work out, and maybe it can down the road. I 48 00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:27,600 Speaker 1: hope they work out. Actually, I would like to see 49 00:02:27,600 --> 00:02:30,880 Speaker 1: them get back together Ben Affleck and j Lo. Yeah, okay, 50 00:02:30,960 --> 00:02:32,680 Speaker 1: Well I hope that comes true for you. Then, I 51 00:02:32,720 --> 00:02:34,200 Speaker 1: don't know what I think about that. I don't have 52 00:02:34,200 --> 00:02:40,240 Speaker 1: a preference situation, not today. I often think of which 53 00:02:40,280 --> 00:02:42,360 Speaker 1: male celebrity I would like to see you end up with. 54 00:02:42,720 --> 00:02:45,600 Speaker 1: Do you have any thoughts on this? I'd like your opinion. No, 55 00:02:45,840 --> 00:02:49,119 Speaker 1: I don't. Actually, I haven't thought about that. There's someone 56 00:02:49,160 --> 00:02:50,480 Speaker 1: that we've talked about a couple of times that I 57 00:02:50,480 --> 00:02:53,880 Speaker 1: would have liked to see you with, Gerard Butler. Gerard 58 00:02:53,919 --> 00:02:57,240 Speaker 1: Butler is we would cancel each other out because he's 59 00:02:57,600 --> 00:02:59,800 Speaker 1: a little bit wild like I'm a little bit wild. 60 00:03:00,520 --> 00:03:03,000 Speaker 1: I would actually venture to say that Gerard Butler is 61 00:03:03,080 --> 00:03:05,960 Speaker 1: more wild than I am, really, but he's a really 62 00:03:06,040 --> 00:03:09,040 Speaker 1: nice guy. John Hamm, John Hamm is a really nice 63 00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:10,800 Speaker 1: guy too. John Hamm has a girlfriend right now. I 64 00:03:10,800 --> 00:03:13,120 Speaker 1: think I did have a question John ham though for 65 00:03:13,160 --> 00:03:15,960 Speaker 1: a long long time, those are the two that come 66 00:03:16,000 --> 00:03:17,960 Speaker 1: to my mind most often. Yeah, and I had a 67 00:03:17,960 --> 00:03:22,040 Speaker 1: crush on him, and then I have another one. I 68 00:03:22,040 --> 00:03:24,600 Speaker 1: don't know why, but you did justin Long's podcast a 69 00:03:24,600 --> 00:03:27,280 Speaker 1: while ago. And I just find him very attractive. And 70 00:03:27,280 --> 00:03:29,560 Speaker 1: I've seen him out and about a few times and 71 00:03:29,639 --> 00:03:32,640 Speaker 1: he just has this error to him where he seems 72 00:03:32,800 --> 00:03:37,800 Speaker 1: very confident, and I would love to see that happen. Okay, Well, 73 00:03:37,920 --> 00:03:39,360 Speaker 1: you guys could have a good time together. Well, I 74 00:03:39,400 --> 00:03:41,480 Speaker 1: did his podcast and we did have a great time together. 75 00:03:41,520 --> 00:03:44,720 Speaker 1: I really really like him, but he's not really my type. 76 00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:47,400 Speaker 1: What is your type? Let's get into that for a bit. 77 00:03:47,440 --> 00:03:50,400 Speaker 1: We talked about that your masculine. I like a guy 78 00:03:50,440 --> 00:03:52,920 Speaker 1: that's first of all, physically bigger than I am. I 79 00:03:52,960 --> 00:03:55,800 Speaker 1: want to feel like a girl, like a dainty little Yeah. 80 00:03:55,840 --> 00:03:57,320 Speaker 1: I've had sex with a couple of guys that were 81 00:03:57,360 --> 00:04:00,320 Speaker 1: smaller than me, and I didn't really like that. Wasn't 82 00:04:00,320 --> 00:04:07,040 Speaker 1: Ted small. Ted was short, but stout corpula, He wasn't tall. 83 00:04:08,120 --> 00:04:11,040 Speaker 1: I don't remember. There's always say that I like short guys, 84 00:04:11,120 --> 00:04:13,280 Speaker 1: and I'm like, I do not, and then they go 85 00:04:13,360 --> 00:04:15,280 Speaker 1: and list all the men I've dated, and like half 86 00:04:15,280 --> 00:04:17,159 Speaker 1: of them are like five nine or five ten. But 87 00:04:17,200 --> 00:04:20,840 Speaker 1: that's not really short. Chewy was short, all right, Well, 88 00:04:21,000 --> 00:04:24,800 Speaker 1: we were going to build a guy for you. Yeah. 89 00:04:24,839 --> 00:04:26,760 Speaker 1: I think that people should know so they know what 90 00:04:26,839 --> 00:04:28,840 Speaker 1: to keep an eye out for. You like a British guy. 91 00:04:28,880 --> 00:04:31,400 Speaker 1: Actually I do. I love British guys. I like foreigners. 92 00:04:31,600 --> 00:04:33,480 Speaker 1: You like black guys? What not a black British guy? 93 00:04:33,520 --> 00:04:35,440 Speaker 1: What about your driver? That would be a home run. 94 00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:38,159 Speaker 1: In any of your outings this last week, did you 95 00:04:38,200 --> 00:04:41,240 Speaker 1: ever go out and start a conversation? I went to 96 00:04:41,320 --> 00:04:44,240 Speaker 1: Hotel bel Air. This was your homework assignment, I know, 97 00:04:44,279 --> 00:04:46,120 Speaker 1: but there were no men around, and the men that 98 00:04:46,160 --> 00:04:48,760 Speaker 1: were lesbian convention. No, it was just I was with 99 00:04:48,800 --> 00:04:50,880 Speaker 1: a girlfriend. It's hard to look and check out other 100 00:04:50,880 --> 00:04:52,800 Speaker 1: guys when you're with somebody. I like to be focused 101 00:04:52,800 --> 00:04:54,719 Speaker 1: on what I'm doing. She and I had a great 102 00:04:54,760 --> 00:04:56,760 Speaker 1: time without men. So I did not approach a man. 103 00:04:56,800 --> 00:04:58,680 Speaker 1: I'm going to do it. It's a good challenge for me. 104 00:04:58,800 --> 00:05:01,320 Speaker 1: I'll find somebody to hit on. Stay tuned for that, 105 00:05:01,360 --> 00:05:06,240 Speaker 1: you guys. Let's take a quick break. So have you 106 00:05:06,279 --> 00:05:08,200 Speaker 1: ever felt like there's a time where your advice was 107 00:05:08,240 --> 00:05:12,200 Speaker 1: invasive or unwanted? Yeah, all the time. That's happens to 108 00:05:12,279 --> 00:05:15,960 Speaker 1: me all the time. I give unsolicited advice. That's my problem. 109 00:05:16,040 --> 00:05:17,880 Speaker 1: But are there certain people into your life, you know, 110 00:05:17,920 --> 00:05:20,559 Speaker 1: even if they aren't asking for it, needed or want 111 00:05:20,600 --> 00:05:24,640 Speaker 1: it unknowingly? Well, maybe that's how you can justify it. 112 00:05:24,680 --> 00:05:27,279 Speaker 1: But yeah, some people are receptive to it and then go, 113 00:05:27,320 --> 00:05:29,000 Speaker 1: oh thank you like you always say, oh thank you 114 00:05:29,040 --> 00:05:31,160 Speaker 1: for telling me. Yeah, because I think it's important to 115 00:05:31,200 --> 00:05:33,560 Speaker 1: people in your life that you care about. Normally they're 116 00:05:33,560 --> 00:05:35,880 Speaker 1: giving you their opinion or advice on something. It's coming 117 00:05:35,880 --> 00:05:39,680 Speaker 1: from a good place, like no one advice with malice. Yeah, 118 00:05:39,760 --> 00:05:41,960 Speaker 1: I think I used to do that, probably be a 119 00:05:41,960 --> 00:05:44,599 Speaker 1: little bit malicious. Well, the reason I ask is because 120 00:05:44,640 --> 00:05:46,839 Speaker 1: a lot of the submissions today are people kind of 121 00:05:46,839 --> 00:05:51,640 Speaker 1: either overstepping or perfect Well that's your area of expertise, overbearing, 122 00:05:51,720 --> 00:05:55,760 Speaker 1: overstepping or shockingly in one of them, that they're disinterested 123 00:05:55,920 --> 00:05:58,640 Speaker 1: in the feedback at all, So I think we should 124 00:05:58,640 --> 00:06:01,359 Speaker 1: just get right into it. And our first mission comes 125 00:06:01,440 --> 00:06:04,320 Speaker 1: from a woman named Kimberly. She's a night nurse at 126 00:06:04,320 --> 00:06:07,200 Speaker 1: a nursing home and she writes, Dear Chelsea, myself and 127 00:06:07,240 --> 00:06:10,000 Speaker 1: several co workers are being bullied at work. With COVID 128 00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:12,480 Speaker 1: restricting so much employment, we feel stuck in our jobs. 129 00:06:12,680 --> 00:06:16,600 Speaker 1: Management excuses the bad behavior as personality conflicts. It's like 130 00:06:16,720 --> 00:06:19,680 Speaker 1: us around the house. Our coworker comes on the floor 131 00:06:20,080 --> 00:06:22,800 Speaker 1: and we feel her mission to belittle us, to grade 132 00:06:22,880 --> 00:06:24,839 Speaker 1: us and shame us. We are frontline workers in a 133 00:06:24,880 --> 00:06:27,839 Speaker 1: nursing home and it is affecting our ability to care 134 00:06:27,839 --> 00:06:31,080 Speaker 1: and support for our residents with dignity and love. What 135 00:06:31,200 --> 00:06:34,000 Speaker 1: do you advise that they all need to get together, 136 00:06:34,200 --> 00:06:37,120 Speaker 1: All of you guys need to join forces and stand 137 00:06:37,240 --> 00:06:39,920 Speaker 1: up to the bully together saying that this is unacceptable 138 00:06:39,920 --> 00:06:42,760 Speaker 1: behavior in the middle of a pandemic. No, less, don't 139 00:06:42,760 --> 00:06:45,800 Speaker 1: feed the beast. Well, I mean, it's just unacceptable that 140 00:06:45,880 --> 00:06:48,400 Speaker 1: a colleague is coming on the floor and belittling them 141 00:06:48,440 --> 00:06:50,000 Speaker 1: and that they have to even put up with that. 142 00:06:50,240 --> 00:06:52,479 Speaker 1: What do you think of the boss is disregarding the 143 00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:55,080 Speaker 1: not surprising. I mean, who wants to deal with it? 144 00:06:55,160 --> 00:06:57,560 Speaker 1: No boss, you know, especially at a nursing home, it's 145 00:06:57,600 --> 00:07:01,039 Speaker 1: probably like really really low hanging for Yeah, I agree, 146 00:07:01,160 --> 00:07:03,240 Speaker 1: you just need to address it. But I just used 147 00:07:03,279 --> 00:07:05,560 Speaker 1: low hanging fruit the right way. I don't know. I 148 00:07:05,600 --> 00:07:09,280 Speaker 1: don't either. That doesn't seem like I did. I'm confused. 149 00:07:09,279 --> 00:07:13,120 Speaker 1: I would say it probably wasn't used the right way, 150 00:07:13,240 --> 00:07:16,080 Speaker 1: but at a nursing home, I couldn't tell you what is. Well, 151 00:07:16,120 --> 00:07:20,680 Speaker 1: there is definitely low hanging fruit. Yeah. Yeah, So I 152 00:07:20,680 --> 00:07:22,360 Speaker 1: think that this is one of those situations where you 153 00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:24,040 Speaker 1: just kind of have to confront it head on, like 154 00:07:24,080 --> 00:07:26,640 Speaker 1: if it's not going away, you're going to need to 155 00:07:26,680 --> 00:07:29,560 Speaker 1: address it. It reminds me of Andrew Cuomo the bullying, 156 00:07:29,760 --> 00:07:31,720 Speaker 1: you know, because I just read that article. There was 157 00:07:31,760 --> 00:07:34,080 Speaker 1: a big piece on him that I just read recently, 158 00:07:34,200 --> 00:07:36,040 Speaker 1: and you know, it was just talking about the pathology 159 00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:39,240 Speaker 1: of his behavior, you know, of him being a bully 160 00:07:39,320 --> 00:07:41,640 Speaker 1: to so many people for so many years in New York. 161 00:07:41,640 --> 00:07:43,880 Speaker 1: Because it's gonna be interesting to see what happens with Andrew. Quote, 162 00:07:43,960 --> 00:07:45,880 Speaker 1: you're glad you dodged that bullet. Well, I don't think 163 00:07:45,920 --> 00:07:48,040 Speaker 1: I dodged the bullet as much as he dodged me, 164 00:07:48,840 --> 00:07:52,080 Speaker 1: because I had a crush on him. And then I 165 00:07:52,120 --> 00:07:54,440 Speaker 1: talked to him on the phone a few times, and 166 00:07:54,480 --> 00:07:57,120 Speaker 1: we texted a couple of times and it was very flirtatious, 167 00:07:57,160 --> 00:07:59,000 Speaker 1: and I thought for sure there was going to be 168 00:07:59,520 --> 00:08:02,280 Speaker 1: penetrate Shan. Well, now we know why I didn't work out, 169 00:08:02,320 --> 00:08:04,680 Speaker 1: because he wouldn't be able to bully you. He was like, 170 00:08:04,840 --> 00:08:07,760 Speaker 1: apparently he doesn't like women that throwed themselves at him. 171 00:08:07,800 --> 00:08:10,920 Speaker 1: He prefers to take it. Like all of the stories 172 00:08:10,920 --> 00:08:13,600 Speaker 1: of sexual harassment. I mean, the sexual harassment stories are 173 00:08:13,680 --> 00:08:16,600 Speaker 1: him like grabbing somebody. Nobody's accusing him of sexual assault. 174 00:08:17,240 --> 00:08:19,000 Speaker 1: But I did dodge a bullet. You know, when you 175 00:08:19,040 --> 00:08:20,640 Speaker 1: find out all of that, you're like, oh my god, 176 00:08:20,640 --> 00:08:23,640 Speaker 1: thank god, I think dating him or have sex with 177 00:08:23,720 --> 00:08:26,800 Speaker 1: him even Well, I told you from the beginning, because 178 00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:29,760 Speaker 1: he's sixty two and I'm forty six, and that's just 179 00:08:29,840 --> 00:08:33,280 Speaker 1: like his body looks like a melting candle. You can't well, 180 00:08:33,320 --> 00:08:36,400 Speaker 1: it looks like he's transitioning it into a woman because 181 00:08:36,440 --> 00:08:38,480 Speaker 1: like a lot of men that age start to look 182 00:08:38,520 --> 00:08:41,440 Speaker 1: like women, right, but a very butcher woman, lesbian woman, 183 00:08:41,520 --> 00:08:44,079 Speaker 1: but his mother. Basically, if you've seen pictures of his mom, 184 00:08:44,120 --> 00:08:47,040 Speaker 1: he looks a lot like his mom. And so it 185 00:08:47,160 --> 00:08:49,040 Speaker 1: was already like, was I going to be able to 186 00:08:49,080 --> 00:08:51,000 Speaker 1: go down that road and like be able to see 187 00:08:51,000 --> 00:08:52,240 Speaker 1: the things that I was going to see on his 188 00:08:52,320 --> 00:08:56,120 Speaker 1: body and not. I zoomed in on so many Instagram 189 00:08:56,160 --> 00:08:59,640 Speaker 1: posts and pictures to see exactly where his we exchanged 190 00:08:59,720 --> 00:09:01,640 Speaker 1: quite of you of those were on his body right, 191 00:09:01,640 --> 00:09:03,840 Speaker 1: because there was a lot of questions about his nipples 192 00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:07,120 Speaker 1: and then where were they, you know, down or up? 193 00:09:08,160 --> 00:09:10,520 Speaker 1: And then there are a lot of questions about, you know, 194 00:09:10,720 --> 00:09:13,600 Speaker 1: the background of that mansion he lives in and Albany 195 00:09:13,640 --> 00:09:16,480 Speaker 1: also and the decor. That was going to be a 196 00:09:16,480 --> 00:09:20,120 Speaker 1: hard pill to swallow, but luckily that didn't happen. I 197 00:09:20,120 --> 00:09:22,200 Speaker 1: don't know how this relates it all to the nursing home, 198 00:09:22,440 --> 00:09:24,800 Speaker 1: but I think you brought up nursing homes and bullying 199 00:09:24,840 --> 00:09:27,679 Speaker 1: and I immediately went to answer Cromo so sorry, I'm 200 00:09:27,720 --> 00:09:30,640 Speaker 1: so sorry. Well, Kimberly, I think to wrap this up 201 00:09:30,720 --> 00:09:32,480 Speaker 1: is you just need to address it head on yourself. 202 00:09:32,559 --> 00:09:35,400 Speaker 1: If the admin and the office doesn't do anything about it, 203 00:09:35,440 --> 00:09:38,440 Speaker 1: then it takes the bullies power away. You just address it, 204 00:09:38,480 --> 00:09:41,360 Speaker 1: get your little gang of girls together, guys who whomever. Yeah, 205 00:09:41,400 --> 00:09:43,920 Speaker 1: you just have to join forces and stand up to 206 00:09:43,960 --> 00:09:47,800 Speaker 1: the bully. Fuck that. As an adult being bullied, it's like, 207 00:09:47,840 --> 00:09:50,920 Speaker 1: no thanks. It's these people who just want a sense 208 00:09:50,960 --> 00:09:54,080 Speaker 1: of power so if they don't have it. It's this 209 00:09:54,200 --> 00:09:57,840 Speaker 1: is the exact way I think of middle school receptionists. 210 00:09:58,080 --> 00:10:01,400 Speaker 1: It's like they just love and they're always like sausage 211 00:10:01,440 --> 00:10:04,720 Speaker 1: finger like Sharon's like, they just would yeah, like that 212 00:10:04,760 --> 00:10:08,040 Speaker 1: principle's reception. Yeah, they just feel like adjacent to the power, 213 00:10:08,160 --> 00:10:11,440 Speaker 1: so they like to flex that muscle. It's like a 214 00:10:11,440 --> 00:10:14,760 Speaker 1: crossing guard. Basically a crossing guard, somebody gets way out 215 00:10:14,760 --> 00:10:17,680 Speaker 1: of control with their responsibility. It's like a police officer 216 00:10:17,720 --> 00:10:20,480 Speaker 1: when they're directing traffic. That happens in Martha's Vineyard a lot, 217 00:10:20,920 --> 00:10:24,200 Speaker 1: and it's like, Okay, everybody, calm down. Guys. People love 218 00:10:24,280 --> 00:10:25,920 Speaker 1: to be able to put someone else in the place, 219 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:28,720 Speaker 1: Like anytime you go do you have never experienced this, 220 00:10:28,760 --> 00:10:30,960 Speaker 1: I can guarantee, But like going to do a return 221 00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:32,960 Speaker 1: if you're a day over or use a coupon on 222 00:10:33,040 --> 00:10:34,480 Speaker 1: something and they don't want to do I'm like, is 223 00:10:34,520 --> 00:10:36,960 Speaker 1: this the fucking issue you want to take up right now? Like, 224 00:10:37,040 --> 00:10:39,400 Speaker 1: is this really the expiration date on a coupon? Oh 225 00:10:39,440 --> 00:10:42,040 Speaker 1: my god, it's so freaking annoying. Are you using coupons? Yes? 226 00:10:42,080 --> 00:10:43,960 Speaker 1: I use coupons for you and you don't even know it. 227 00:10:44,280 --> 00:10:50,600 Speaker 1: That's sweet, sweetheart. Yes, I'm thirty. I told you economically responsible, Well, 228 00:10:52,120 --> 00:10:54,000 Speaker 1: you doesn't matter how much you have, it's how much 229 00:10:54,040 --> 00:10:57,480 Speaker 1: you save. And that's where I come in. Yeah. Well, anyway, 230 00:10:57,840 --> 00:11:00,840 Speaker 1: so that's that's also advice for everyone listening. It's not 231 00:11:00,880 --> 00:11:04,160 Speaker 1: how much you have, it's how much you save. Save, yes, 232 00:11:04,240 --> 00:11:09,720 Speaker 1: because you need to save. Oh girl, please please. Unbelievable. 233 00:11:10,040 --> 00:11:13,080 Speaker 1: I'm still using the coupons. Our next submission comes from 234 00:11:13,240 --> 00:11:17,079 Speaker 1: Nicole Tran. She's twenty five. We have her on the line, 235 00:11:17,120 --> 00:11:19,920 Speaker 1: but her submission says, Hi, Chelsea, I'm a big fan 236 00:11:19,960 --> 00:11:22,760 Speaker 1: of you since Chelsea lately. That's nice. Thank you for 237 00:11:22,800 --> 00:11:24,840 Speaker 1: being such a good role model. As I've gotten older, 238 00:11:24,840 --> 00:11:26,880 Speaker 1: I've realized that dating men my age has gotten worse 239 00:11:26,920 --> 00:11:30,360 Speaker 1: and worse, especially with the Me Too movement and broke culture. 240 00:11:30,480 --> 00:11:33,360 Speaker 1: I realize I can't hate them more. Any dating advice 241 00:11:33,400 --> 00:11:36,840 Speaker 1: that you would give yourself at twenty five so Nicole, 242 00:11:37,520 --> 00:11:42,880 Speaker 1: I'm oh, you are look at look at Nicole, Hi, Nicole. 243 00:11:44,720 --> 00:11:48,440 Speaker 1: I mean it's so so disappointing. What men have taken. 244 00:11:49,200 --> 00:11:51,760 Speaker 1: The last couple of years with men have been so disappointing. 245 00:11:51,760 --> 00:11:54,360 Speaker 1: Like I totally feel your pain because I'm forty six, 246 00:11:54,400 --> 00:11:57,000 Speaker 1: I'm twenty one years older than you, and I feel 247 00:11:57,000 --> 00:11:59,839 Speaker 1: exactly the way that you fucking feel. I'm like, are 248 00:11:59,840 --> 00:12:02,920 Speaker 1: you fucking serious, you guys, Like, are you guys gonna 249 00:12:02,960 --> 00:12:05,960 Speaker 1: be this disappointing for us for the rest of our lives. 250 00:12:06,160 --> 00:12:09,120 Speaker 1: We're telling you that you need to start behaving in 251 00:12:09,120 --> 00:12:12,040 Speaker 1: a different way. We're trying to help you win, and 252 00:12:12,080 --> 00:12:15,280 Speaker 1: they still won't fucking listen. Yeah, it can't be easier 253 00:12:15,280 --> 00:12:17,200 Speaker 1: than that. And that's the funny thing, Like you're literally 254 00:12:17,200 --> 00:12:20,160 Speaker 1: giving them the advice that they need, and it it's 255 00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:23,679 Speaker 1: still more disappointing, Like if these are the tools that 256 00:12:23,720 --> 00:12:27,320 Speaker 1: you need to be better, and then they make it 257 00:12:27,320 --> 00:12:31,160 Speaker 1: about themselves again. Yes, yes, women have quite literally given 258 00:12:31,200 --> 00:12:33,040 Speaker 1: men a road map to get laid and they still 259 00:12:33,040 --> 00:12:35,199 Speaker 1: get lost, like where, well, I don't understand what you 260 00:12:35,240 --> 00:12:37,240 Speaker 1: want be like, I actually just know it's like I 261 00:12:37,280 --> 00:12:39,640 Speaker 1: want to funk all you guys. And you're ruining it. 262 00:12:39,679 --> 00:12:42,400 Speaker 1: You're blowing it. All of you guys are blowing it 263 00:12:42,880 --> 00:12:46,040 Speaker 1: because we It's like women want you to succeed. Yet 264 00:12:46,160 --> 00:12:49,000 Speaker 1: like straight white men do not understand what the funk 265 00:12:49,080 --> 00:12:52,199 Speaker 1: is going on. They are so resistant, Like this one 266 00:12:52,200 --> 00:12:53,880 Speaker 1: guy in Canada. I was talking to this one guy 267 00:12:53,920 --> 00:12:56,600 Speaker 1: in Canada and we're skiing, and he said, he goes, 268 00:12:56,640 --> 00:12:59,160 Speaker 1: it does feel like a little bit like reverse discrimination 269 00:12:59,240 --> 00:13:02,480 Speaker 1: on the subject of white male patriarchy. Blah blah, he goes, 270 00:13:02,520 --> 00:13:05,200 Speaker 1: it does feel like I understand everything needs to be equal, 271 00:13:05,760 --> 00:13:08,680 Speaker 1: but it does feel like reverse discrimination. And I just 272 00:13:08,760 --> 00:13:11,079 Speaker 1: looked at him and thought, like, well, I didn't think. 273 00:13:11,160 --> 00:13:13,880 Speaker 1: I said, you know, first of all, you're okay with 274 00:13:14,040 --> 00:13:17,240 Speaker 1: discrimination as long as it's not reverse you know, just 275 00:13:17,320 --> 00:13:20,640 Speaker 1: saying it like that's the problem. It's like, yeah, that's 276 00:13:20,640 --> 00:13:24,160 Speaker 1: what needs to happen is reverse discrimination for a period 277 00:13:24,160 --> 00:13:28,880 Speaker 1: of time until things become equitable, like in a real way, 278 00:13:28,920 --> 00:13:32,439 Speaker 1: like you know, anyway, don't get me fucking started, obviously, 279 00:13:32,640 --> 00:13:34,920 Speaker 1: Oh my god, So anyway, who was the last person 280 00:13:34,960 --> 00:13:38,360 Speaker 1: you dated? I at this point, I'm just like not 281 00:13:38,559 --> 00:13:42,000 Speaker 1: dating like I've been just like trying to date people, 282 00:13:42,160 --> 00:13:45,160 Speaker 1: and just like on dating apps, but then it would 283 00:13:45,520 --> 00:13:48,280 Speaker 1: I would go and get drinks of people, and then 284 00:13:48,320 --> 00:13:50,760 Speaker 1: it just gets weird, like people will just say really 285 00:13:50,880 --> 00:13:54,160 Speaker 1: stalker ish stuff and I feel like they would lock 286 00:13:54,240 --> 00:13:56,720 Speaker 1: me in their basement and I just get out of there. 287 00:13:58,000 --> 00:13:59,800 Speaker 1: In your submission, you mentioned that you live in a 288 00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:03,800 Speaker 1: college town. To me, that speaks volumes about the type 289 00:14:03,800 --> 00:14:06,480 Speaker 1: of men who are going to be lingering around your area. 290 00:14:06,559 --> 00:14:08,960 Speaker 1: So it's a lot of like guys in arrested development 291 00:14:09,120 --> 00:14:12,360 Speaker 1: who are clinging to their college days if they've graduated, 292 00:14:12,480 --> 00:14:15,120 Speaker 1: or it's guys in college, in which case like you 293 00:14:15,160 --> 00:14:20,360 Speaker 1: can't you can't, can't you because they're too stupid. And 294 00:14:20,400 --> 00:14:23,240 Speaker 1: I'm in Columbus, Ohio, so like everything is just like 295 00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:27,960 Speaker 1: everything is just a huge campus. So everyone's either extremely 296 00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:32,240 Speaker 1: young or everyone is completely like a frat for life, 297 00:14:32,280 --> 00:14:36,280 Speaker 1: so they just hire everyone who will never grow up 298 00:14:36,600 --> 00:14:39,160 Speaker 1: and it's disappointing. Can I ask for because you're both 299 00:14:39,160 --> 00:14:41,240 Speaker 1: on dating apps, I'm obviously not on a dating app, 300 00:14:41,480 --> 00:14:44,360 Speaker 1: but is there Yeah, I'll see how that goes over. 301 00:14:44,680 --> 00:14:47,640 Speaker 1: Do people not meet through friends anymore? Is it only 302 00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:50,120 Speaker 1: like the accessibility that you and whoever else is on 303 00:14:50,160 --> 00:14:51,880 Speaker 1: the dating app know that you're both looking, so is 304 00:14:51,920 --> 00:14:54,160 Speaker 1: it the convenience. I just don't understand why no one 305 00:14:54,280 --> 00:14:57,120 Speaker 1: is hooked up with through mutual friends who kind of 306 00:14:57,200 --> 00:14:59,960 Speaker 1: understand what you might be into. I think the hardest 307 00:15:00,120 --> 00:15:02,880 Speaker 1: part with that is like if something goes wrong and 308 00:15:02,920 --> 00:15:05,880 Speaker 1: then it doesn't work out, then it's just awkward for 309 00:15:05,920 --> 00:15:08,760 Speaker 1: the rest of your life, and like you're just asking like, oh, 310 00:15:08,920 --> 00:15:10,400 Speaker 1: was that so and so going to be there, and 311 00:15:10,400 --> 00:15:13,000 Speaker 1: then you just have to like dodge out of a 312 00:15:13,080 --> 00:15:15,080 Speaker 1: party or like dodge out of us. And I think 313 00:15:15,120 --> 00:15:17,160 Speaker 1: people have to have a knack for setting people up. 314 00:15:17,200 --> 00:15:20,520 Speaker 1: It's not it's like your friend. No, my friends don't 315 00:15:20,560 --> 00:15:22,360 Speaker 1: set me up, which I think speaks more about my 316 00:15:22,400 --> 00:15:28,640 Speaker 1: personality than it does. They try, and the guys are 317 00:15:29,320 --> 00:15:32,320 Speaker 1: and they're just not quite right. They think, I'm like, listen, guys, 318 00:15:32,400 --> 00:15:33,760 Speaker 1: this is my friends will try and set me up. 319 00:15:33,800 --> 00:15:36,080 Speaker 1: I'm like, ah, this is a little too middle age, 320 00:15:36,120 --> 00:15:38,240 Speaker 1: if you know what I'm talking about. And they're like, 321 00:15:38,320 --> 00:15:40,800 Speaker 1: you are middle aged. I'm like, god, no, I'm freking 322 00:15:40,840 --> 00:15:44,040 Speaker 1: not okay, not in my head, but you know what, 323 00:15:44,280 --> 00:15:46,040 Speaker 1: just take a break, because I think a lot of 324 00:15:46,080 --> 00:15:48,200 Speaker 1: women feel the way you feel about men, and you 325 00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:50,880 Speaker 1: just need to like take a break and wait for 326 00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:53,480 Speaker 1: like a crush to develop naturally, you know what I mean, 327 00:15:53,520 --> 00:15:56,160 Speaker 1: so that you can be reintroduced to the idea of flirtation. 328 00:15:56,640 --> 00:15:59,800 Speaker 1: Dating apps are just like it's like COVID, it's like fatigue, 329 00:16:00,040 --> 00:16:03,040 Speaker 1: you know, you have, like they become so boring and 330 00:16:03,080 --> 00:16:05,320 Speaker 1: wrote and it's just adds to the day to day 331 00:16:05,400 --> 00:16:08,680 Speaker 1: mundaneus that everyone kind of is feeling psychologically because of 332 00:16:09,120 --> 00:16:13,080 Speaker 1: quarantining and etcetera. So I would say take a break 333 00:16:13,240 --> 00:16:16,200 Speaker 1: and you know, just try and focus on yourself actually, 334 00:16:16,240 --> 00:16:18,200 Speaker 1: because that's never bad when you take some time and 335 00:16:18,280 --> 00:16:21,200 Speaker 1: just so like try and get like healthy, you know 336 00:16:21,280 --> 00:16:24,200 Speaker 1: what I mean, get grounded, read books and stuff. You 337 00:16:24,240 --> 00:16:25,920 Speaker 1: always get a prize at the end of that, which 338 00:16:25,920 --> 00:16:28,040 Speaker 1: will hopefully come in the package of a man that 339 00:16:28,120 --> 00:16:32,040 Speaker 1: you want to have sex with. That's true, absolutely, and 340 00:16:32,040 --> 00:16:33,800 Speaker 1: if not, then you're not out any of that energy 341 00:16:33,880 --> 00:16:35,640 Speaker 1: that you would have invested into the man because you've 342 00:16:35,680 --> 00:16:39,320 Speaker 1: invested in it into yourself. So it's a real win 343 00:16:39,400 --> 00:16:43,520 Speaker 1: either way, exactly, it's a win win. That's very accurate. 344 00:16:43,600 --> 00:16:46,080 Speaker 1: Went in doubt invest in yourself. That's going to be 345 00:16:46,120 --> 00:16:50,120 Speaker 1: our hashtag for this podcast. If if I believed in hashtags. 346 00:16:50,280 --> 00:16:52,520 Speaker 1: Maybe you could keep us posted on your next few days, Yeah, 347 00:16:52,800 --> 00:16:54,880 Speaker 1: and circle back tell us what happened. I just told 348 00:16:54,880 --> 00:16:56,880 Speaker 1: you to take a break, though, Brandon, you're giving me 349 00:16:56,960 --> 00:17:00,560 Speaker 1: conflicting advice now when it does happen. Okay, yeah, keep 350 00:17:00,600 --> 00:17:02,480 Speaker 1: us posted. We want all of our callers to keep 351 00:17:02,520 --> 00:17:05,240 Speaker 1: us posted as to their progress. That's a good idea, 352 00:17:05,320 --> 00:17:09,119 Speaker 1: perfect All right, Well it was nice, thanks guys, have 353 00:17:09,160 --> 00:17:13,760 Speaker 1: a great day. Bye again. A totally really normal, reasonable person. 354 00:17:13,880 --> 00:17:16,800 Speaker 1: I just really am interested. Like I like these callers. 355 00:17:17,080 --> 00:17:18,760 Speaker 1: Everyone has the same issues. And this is what I 356 00:17:18,800 --> 00:17:21,919 Speaker 1: don't understand with people. Everyone has the same issues. I 357 00:17:21,960 --> 00:17:24,919 Speaker 1: think they're common that everyone is facing some of the 358 00:17:24,960 --> 00:17:28,840 Speaker 1: same hurdles with especially dating. Well, you're not having that 359 00:17:28,920 --> 00:17:31,600 Speaker 1: problem because you're in a relationship, yes, But everyone who's 360 00:17:31,600 --> 00:17:33,320 Speaker 1: on these apps, it's like everyone wants to be in 361 00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:35,560 Speaker 1: a relationship or find someone, yet they spend all their 362 00:17:35,600 --> 00:17:37,760 Speaker 1: time texting on it and they never said anything up. 363 00:17:37,800 --> 00:17:39,800 Speaker 1: I talked to a friend recently who had said the 364 00:17:39,800 --> 00:17:41,360 Speaker 1: same thing that he had been talking to this guy 365 00:17:41,400 --> 00:17:44,000 Speaker 1: for like weeks on a dating app. I said, well, 366 00:17:44,119 --> 00:17:46,480 Speaker 1: have you tried to set a date? And he's like, yeah, 367 00:17:46,520 --> 00:17:48,520 Speaker 1: well here and there, you know, we'll talk about it. 368 00:17:48,640 --> 00:17:52,160 Speaker 1: I'm like I would exchange two messages before I said, like, hey, 369 00:17:52,520 --> 00:17:55,159 Speaker 1: let's meet here. I'm available like this time these weeks. 370 00:17:55,480 --> 00:17:56,960 Speaker 1: Do you want to get together? If the whole point 371 00:17:57,000 --> 00:17:59,840 Speaker 1: is to date, you can't fucking do that through a phone, 372 00:18:00,359 --> 00:18:02,000 Speaker 1: So you're gonna have to get out and do something. 373 00:18:02,200 --> 00:18:04,080 Speaker 1: You're actually very good with that. You normally if you're 374 00:18:04,080 --> 00:18:06,880 Speaker 1: into someone, you meet them right away for a drink 375 00:18:06,960 --> 00:18:10,520 Speaker 1: or dinner or something. I'm sorry, I was just reading 376 00:18:10,560 --> 00:18:12,199 Speaker 1: a text from my brother who said he was on 377 00:18:12,240 --> 00:18:14,520 Speaker 1: the way his way to get his birth certificate. Did 378 00:18:14,520 --> 00:18:16,920 Speaker 1: you see that text from Roy? He said, Hi, guys, 379 00:18:16,920 --> 00:18:19,159 Speaker 1: sorry for the late reply. I was playing basketball and 380 00:18:19,200 --> 00:18:20,840 Speaker 1: then I'm on my way to Elizabeth to get my 381 00:18:20,840 --> 00:18:23,200 Speaker 1: birth certificate. Ask him if you can find your parents 382 00:18:23,400 --> 00:18:26,960 Speaker 1: marriage certificate, that would be really handy. Can you find 383 00:18:27,400 --> 00:18:29,240 Speaker 1: just so you know, we need the marrige certificate because 384 00:18:29,240 --> 00:18:32,600 Speaker 1: we've been trying to get Chelsea's German citizenship, any citizenship 385 00:18:32,640 --> 00:18:35,159 Speaker 1: from any country. I want it. She'll go anywhere. An 386 00:18:35,160 --> 00:18:38,560 Speaker 1: additional passport is always welcome, and we can't find her 387 00:18:38,560 --> 00:18:40,359 Speaker 1: parents marriage certificate. I don't know if they did it 388 00:18:40,400 --> 00:18:43,520 Speaker 1: off the books or what. But we've searched basically every 389 00:18:43,560 --> 00:18:46,280 Speaker 1: county in New Jersey. Considering that they're my parents, they 390 00:18:46,280 --> 00:18:48,480 Speaker 1: probably aren't even fucking married and we're lying to us 391 00:18:48,520 --> 00:18:50,720 Speaker 1: about that. Also, you know, I have a brother I 392 00:18:50,760 --> 00:18:52,879 Speaker 1: found out about right that I didn't know. I just 393 00:18:52,880 --> 00:18:56,160 Speaker 1: found out about that recently. I'm always learning new things about. Yeah, 394 00:18:56,200 --> 00:18:58,760 Speaker 1: I'll focus on the brothers I do have. Oh great, Well, 395 00:18:58,760 --> 00:19:00,080 Speaker 1: why don't you see if this brother that you do 396 00:19:00,160 --> 00:19:03,960 Speaker 1: have confined the maor certificate right right? Because my brother Roy, 397 00:19:04,040 --> 00:19:06,679 Speaker 1: my brother Roy can't. He doesn't even know where his 398 00:19:06,720 --> 00:19:09,720 Speaker 1: own birth certificate or driver's license is. He's never gonna 399 00:19:09,720 --> 00:19:11,679 Speaker 1: be able to find something that may not even exist. 400 00:19:12,080 --> 00:19:14,120 Speaker 1: We're gonna have Roy. We're gonna have Roy call into 401 00:19:14,119 --> 00:19:17,040 Speaker 1: the show because I want you to hear my brother Roy. 402 00:19:17,200 --> 00:19:20,000 Speaker 1: He's the oldest by default because my other brother, you know, died, 403 00:19:20,640 --> 00:19:22,720 Speaker 1: So Roy became the oldest from my other brother died. 404 00:19:22,720 --> 00:19:25,439 Speaker 1: And at my brother's funeral, my grandfather came over and 405 00:19:25,520 --> 00:19:28,560 Speaker 1: was like, Roy, you're the oldest. Now you're in charge, 406 00:19:28,640 --> 00:19:30,400 Speaker 1: and all of the rest of the siblings were like, 407 00:19:30,560 --> 00:19:34,240 Speaker 1: uh no, he's fucking not. He's stoned all the time. 408 00:19:34,680 --> 00:19:37,439 Speaker 1: This is when he was a teenager, and so we 409 00:19:37,480 --> 00:19:39,880 Speaker 1: were like, he's so not the oldest, and he's not 410 00:19:39,960 --> 00:19:43,280 Speaker 1: in our family dynamic. He's like basically the baby. Even 411 00:19:43,280 --> 00:19:46,200 Speaker 1: though I'm the baby, he's the baby. So I want 412 00:19:46,320 --> 00:19:49,719 Speaker 1: him to tell you his story because he's been in Palau, 413 00:19:49,800 --> 00:19:51,800 Speaker 1: living in Palau for like the last few years. I've 414 00:19:51,840 --> 00:19:54,680 Speaker 1: never met him. He has a very interesting shaped head, 415 00:19:55,200 --> 00:19:58,919 Speaker 1: and he's really sweet and adorable and very funny and 416 00:19:58,960 --> 00:20:02,280 Speaker 1: his real quiet, funny way. I want you to give 417 00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:04,439 Speaker 1: him advice because I don't give my brother advice anymore. 418 00:20:04,520 --> 00:20:06,560 Speaker 1: They're all like, you know, we're all done. They just 419 00:20:06,640 --> 00:20:09,960 Speaker 1: check out. We just want to support him and we 420 00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:12,880 Speaker 1: want him to be happy. Okay, that's I mean, that's 421 00:20:12,880 --> 00:20:14,679 Speaker 1: a good stance to take. I don't even know if 422 00:20:14,680 --> 00:20:17,320 Speaker 1: he wants advice, but he likes to talk so un 423 00:20:17,359 --> 00:20:21,160 Speaker 1: solicited he'll get it. I'll be able to call in 424 00:20:21,280 --> 00:20:24,560 Speaker 1: one of these days. Well, until Roy calls, we have 425 00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:28,360 Speaker 1: Sergio on the phone. He is in his thirties. He's 426 00:20:28,359 --> 00:20:31,800 Speaker 1: from New York, and he writes, dear Oh, this is 427 00:20:31,840 --> 00:20:35,919 Speaker 1: perfect sibling complexities. Dear Chelsea, how do you make sure 428 00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:38,399 Speaker 1: to not overburden your siblings. I want to find balance 429 00:20:38,440 --> 00:20:40,680 Speaker 1: between being a mentor to them and just being an 430 00:20:40,680 --> 00:20:45,440 Speaker 1: older gay brother. Sergio. Hi, Hi, Telsey, Hi, how are 431 00:20:45,480 --> 00:20:49,760 Speaker 1: you good? Good here in the city and telling the weather? Well, Sergio, 432 00:20:49,800 --> 00:20:51,640 Speaker 1: what's going on with your siblings? How many do you have? 433 00:20:51,720 --> 00:20:54,879 Speaker 1: What's the deal? I have way too many siblings. So 434 00:20:54,960 --> 00:20:58,440 Speaker 1: I have six sisters to a younger and one older brother. 435 00:20:59,119 --> 00:21:01,200 Speaker 1: So I'm trying to find the balance between like being 436 00:21:01,640 --> 00:21:04,840 Speaker 1: that gay older brother for my two younger sisters, but 437 00:21:04,920 --> 00:21:08,880 Speaker 1: not two out there for them, you know, talking about 438 00:21:08,880 --> 00:21:11,240 Speaker 1: my sex life or anything like that. Right, Okay, So 439 00:21:11,280 --> 00:21:14,880 Speaker 1: you have six sisters, yes, and then you have two 440 00:21:14,960 --> 00:21:19,919 Speaker 1: younger yes, So how many all together? Eight? My parents 441 00:21:19,960 --> 00:21:23,040 Speaker 1: didn't know about birth control unfortunately, okay, yeah, and a 442 00:21:23,040 --> 00:21:25,080 Speaker 1: lot of people didn't seem to know about the birth control. 443 00:21:25,080 --> 00:21:29,159 Speaker 1: Guess who does know about it? I do. Well, you're gay, Brandon. 444 00:21:29,200 --> 00:21:31,440 Speaker 1: You probably have more to say on this topic before 445 00:21:31,480 --> 00:21:33,840 Speaker 1: I man explain it. Well. I mean, it's all going 446 00:21:33,880 --> 00:21:36,080 Speaker 1: to be about your dynamic with your individual siblings. I 447 00:21:36,119 --> 00:21:39,760 Speaker 1: think a lot of times you just adjust to the 448 00:21:39,800 --> 00:21:42,280 Speaker 1: different personalities in the dynamic you have with that sibling, 449 00:21:42,359 --> 00:21:46,280 Speaker 1: Like I have three sisters, all with very different personalities, 450 00:21:46,359 --> 00:21:48,879 Speaker 1: so what I give them of myself is different. My 451 00:21:49,000 --> 00:21:53,360 Speaker 1: one sister is very sensitive Casa, and we don't how 452 00:21:53,359 --> 00:21:56,119 Speaker 1: do you spell casa k A s y a k 453 00:21:56,440 --> 00:22:01,440 Speaker 1: A s y asa Okay, And she is just the softest, 454 00:22:01,480 --> 00:22:05,320 Speaker 1: sweetest little thing, but she gets very bogged down with 455 00:22:05,440 --> 00:22:08,760 Speaker 1: anything too emotional, so I keep it very light with her. 456 00:22:09,200 --> 00:22:11,679 Speaker 1: And my sister Kayla, I can talk to about anything, 457 00:22:11,720 --> 00:22:14,159 Speaker 1: like she gets the very gay side of me. She 458 00:22:14,280 --> 00:22:17,439 Speaker 1: will get my unfiltered opinion on her life, and I 459 00:22:17,480 --> 00:22:20,320 Speaker 1: know she's good with that. My sister Brooks, she's older, 460 00:22:20,680 --> 00:22:23,760 Speaker 1: so I'm the one normally like giving her advice. Actually, 461 00:22:23,760 --> 00:22:25,520 Speaker 1: for the first time, we had like a really personal 462 00:22:25,560 --> 00:22:28,119 Speaker 1: conversation about my life recently, and she's like, oh, this 463 00:22:28,160 --> 00:22:30,920 Speaker 1: is such a strange conversation because normally we're talking about 464 00:22:30,920 --> 00:22:33,159 Speaker 1: my stuff and not yours. So I think that it 465 00:22:33,160 --> 00:22:36,960 Speaker 1: really just depends on your relationship with each of those siblings. 466 00:22:37,400 --> 00:22:39,760 Speaker 1: M Yeah, that's actually good advice. Can if I see that. 467 00:22:39,800 --> 00:22:42,280 Speaker 1: With my younger sister Jenny, I have a closer wationship 468 00:22:42,280 --> 00:22:44,040 Speaker 1: with her, but I would just never want to hear 469 00:22:44,080 --> 00:22:46,920 Speaker 1: from her like about her dating life. Like her telling 470 00:22:46,920 --> 00:22:50,120 Speaker 1: me if she's having, you know, intimately something that that's 471 00:22:50,119 --> 00:22:54,480 Speaker 1: just be really weird. Your family is very open with things, yeah, 472 00:22:54,520 --> 00:22:57,159 Speaker 1: are we? Yeah? I guess we are with like sex 473 00:22:57,200 --> 00:22:59,760 Speaker 1: talk and stuff, but only like the girls with the 474 00:22:59,800 --> 00:23:01,760 Speaker 1: girl roles, Like we're not talking to my brothers about 475 00:23:01,800 --> 00:23:08,679 Speaker 1: hooking up. Yeah, Like I just had the best sex. 476 00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:10,760 Speaker 1: But I also just to the point, since this was 477 00:23:10,840 --> 00:23:13,360 Speaker 1: kind of your last note on the gay aspect, I mean, 478 00:23:13,359 --> 00:23:16,520 Speaker 1: that's just such a minor part of those interactions, and 479 00:23:16,520 --> 00:23:20,280 Speaker 1: so I wouldn't let that be what dictates your relationship 480 00:23:20,359 --> 00:23:22,399 Speaker 1: or interaction with your sisters. Like you have to be 481 00:23:22,480 --> 00:23:25,399 Speaker 1: authentically who you are, and that's one area I wouldn't 482 00:23:25,400 --> 00:23:28,560 Speaker 1: want you to like temper or play down just to 483 00:23:28,600 --> 00:23:30,840 Speaker 1: appease someone else. Like if that's you, you need to 484 00:23:30,880 --> 00:23:33,000 Speaker 1: just be you in those relationships, and they all love 485 00:23:33,080 --> 00:23:35,160 Speaker 1: you for that. I would say, you don't have to 486 00:23:35,200 --> 00:23:37,920 Speaker 1: worry about that in those interactions. Yeah, I think the 487 00:23:37,960 --> 00:23:39,600 Speaker 1: most of part would be, like I can't let be 488 00:23:39,600 --> 00:23:41,560 Speaker 1: sure of my grander profile or something like that, you know, 489 00:23:41,600 --> 00:23:43,840 Speaker 1: I mean maybe that's something you keep yourself, though not 490 00:23:43,920 --> 00:23:46,159 Speaker 1: everyone needs to see like the dick pics and I 491 00:23:46,160 --> 00:23:48,920 Speaker 1: think your question. Really at the root of your question, Sergio, 492 00:23:49,080 --> 00:23:51,320 Speaker 1: is the sexual stuff. Are you supposed to share that? 493 00:23:51,359 --> 00:23:53,879 Speaker 1: And the answers no, let's not. Let's go with not 494 00:23:54,000 --> 00:23:58,760 Speaker 1: sharing with your siblings your sexual sexual exactly like the 495 00:23:58,840 --> 00:24:01,679 Speaker 1: meeting someone on grind or those like interactions like you, oh, 496 00:24:01,680 --> 00:24:03,800 Speaker 1: I've met someone on this app, grind, whatever it is, 497 00:24:03,960 --> 00:24:05,439 Speaker 1: you just don't need to say like that you got 498 00:24:05,480 --> 00:24:07,800 Speaker 1: penetrated in the back alley, like you can keep those 499 00:24:07,840 --> 00:24:11,280 Speaker 1: things to yourself. Guy, I'm dating a guy, or I'm 500 00:24:11,280 --> 00:24:15,679 Speaker 1: going on a date, right, going out with a guy? Right, agreed, agreed, 501 00:24:15,720 --> 00:24:21,080 Speaker 1: agreed to wrap on that close Sergio. Alright, fantastic problem. 502 00:24:21,440 --> 00:24:25,360 Speaker 1: Good luck to you, all right, thanks, Words today are 503 00:24:25,359 --> 00:24:28,200 Speaker 1: hard for us, are they? Well? Low hanging fruit, I 504 00:24:28,280 --> 00:24:31,080 Speaker 1: don't I still don't know what phrase not really a 505 00:24:31,119 --> 00:24:33,920 Speaker 1: word though, And that's a combination of words. Yeah, well, 506 00:24:33,960 --> 00:24:36,560 Speaker 1: it means a couple of different things. There's a literal 507 00:24:36,600 --> 00:24:41,760 Speaker 1: translation and then there's the metaphorical. Yeah, that's right. Okay, 508 00:24:41,760 --> 00:24:45,240 Speaker 1: I think we should take a quick break. Okay. Our 509 00:24:45,280 --> 00:24:47,760 Speaker 1: next submission is from Jonathan. He's twenty six. He lives 510 00:24:47,800 --> 00:24:51,720 Speaker 1: in California, and he has some issues with his mom. 511 00:24:51,760 --> 00:24:53,760 Speaker 1: His submission says, Dear Chelsea, I came out in two 512 00:24:53,760 --> 00:24:56,360 Speaker 1: thousand and fourteen. My mom tried giving me an ultimatum 513 00:24:56,640 --> 00:24:59,000 Speaker 1: to change or get kicked out. So I tried to change. 514 00:24:59,080 --> 00:25:01,680 Speaker 1: I actually went to convert and therapy. My mom tried 515 00:25:01,680 --> 00:25:03,240 Speaker 1: to get me to go into the military. She made 516 00:25:03,240 --> 00:25:06,520 Speaker 1: me quit work and stay at home for After I 517 00:25:06,640 --> 00:25:08,880 Speaker 1: had enough, I told her that I cannot change for her. 518 00:25:09,240 --> 00:25:10,760 Speaker 1: She got all my stuff and threw it out into 519 00:25:10,760 --> 00:25:12,520 Speaker 1: the garage port. My dad had to come pick me 520 00:25:12,640 --> 00:25:14,879 Speaker 1: up and help me out. About a year later, me 521 00:25:14,880 --> 00:25:16,720 Speaker 1: and my mom kind of got close again. Then someone 522 00:25:16,800 --> 00:25:19,440 Speaker 1: told her about me being to quote unquote out there 523 00:25:19,480 --> 00:25:21,760 Speaker 1: with my sexuality, and she stopped talking to me again. 524 00:25:22,359 --> 00:25:24,719 Speaker 1: Should I ever forgive her if she asks for another chance? 525 00:25:25,119 --> 00:25:27,679 Speaker 1: And he includes a photo of her throwing all of 526 00:25:27,680 --> 00:25:30,040 Speaker 1: his stuff out into the garage port. So, Jonathan, are 527 00:25:30,040 --> 00:25:33,280 Speaker 1: you there? I am here. How are you guys? Hi? Jonathan, 528 00:25:33,520 --> 00:25:35,439 Speaker 1: how do you guys? Day go in? Well, I'm so 529 00:25:35,480 --> 00:25:38,159 Speaker 1: glad that Brandon's here because this seems like another question 530 00:25:38,400 --> 00:25:40,960 Speaker 1: that you should take the lead on, Brandon, because we've 531 00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:45,720 Speaker 1: had a couple of submissions that lean gay. So I've 532 00:25:45,760 --> 00:25:47,800 Speaker 1: been I've been fielding us. You have beautiful teeth, by 533 00:25:47,800 --> 00:25:50,360 Speaker 1: the way, Thank you. I appreciate it. The reason why, yeah, 534 00:25:50,359 --> 00:25:51,679 Speaker 1: I don't want to jump in because that's what a 535 00:25:51,680 --> 00:25:53,560 Speaker 1: man would do. A white man would jump in, A 536 00:25:53,600 --> 00:25:55,760 Speaker 1: white straight man would jump in and say, oh, why 537 00:25:55,760 --> 00:25:58,159 Speaker 1: don't I answer this question about being gay in Puerto 538 00:25:58,240 --> 00:26:01,719 Speaker 1: Rican and the Puerto Rican But I'm gay? Well, right, 539 00:26:01,760 --> 00:26:04,040 Speaker 1: but if you were a Puerto Rican and I don't 540 00:26:04,080 --> 00:26:05,840 Speaker 1: want to act like a white man, you know what 541 00:26:05,840 --> 00:26:07,919 Speaker 1: I mean, it's bad enough what's going on. But we 542 00:26:07,960 --> 00:26:12,320 Speaker 1: do work in cahoots, so her perspective will also important. 543 00:26:12,680 --> 00:26:14,800 Speaker 1: But I mean, I'm so sorry that this is the 544 00:26:14,840 --> 00:26:17,920 Speaker 1: type of advice that you need. I have a very 545 00:26:17,920 --> 00:26:21,920 Speaker 1: complicated relationship with my mother, so I'm like, I fully 546 00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:24,600 Speaker 1: understand how difficult that dynamic. Can you have to call 547 00:26:24,640 --> 00:26:27,520 Speaker 1: the police on his mother before and he has. It's 548 00:26:27,640 --> 00:26:31,080 Speaker 1: very tricky. And I understand also with the gay aspect 549 00:26:31,119 --> 00:26:34,240 Speaker 1: and their reception of that and how that can also 550 00:26:34,400 --> 00:26:37,720 Speaker 1: burden the relationship even though it shouldn't. So now you're 551 00:26:37,800 --> 00:26:41,280 Speaker 1: responsible for trying to get that relationship back on course 552 00:26:41,560 --> 00:26:45,320 Speaker 1: for something that's you know, natural in regard to everything 553 00:26:45,760 --> 00:26:48,120 Speaker 1: that you went through. After you're coming out, I think 554 00:26:48,160 --> 00:26:51,000 Speaker 1: you really need to let go of so like you 555 00:26:51,040 --> 00:26:53,720 Speaker 1: included the photo, I understand that it was a painful 556 00:26:53,920 --> 00:26:56,120 Speaker 1: situation and to be treated that way and go through 557 00:26:56,119 --> 00:27:00,239 Speaker 1: the conversion therapy and try to fix something that is 558 00:27:00,480 --> 00:27:03,520 Speaker 1: inherent to you. But holding onto that just takes up 559 00:27:03,560 --> 00:27:06,080 Speaker 1: space and it doesn't It doesn't do anything positive for you. 560 00:27:06,119 --> 00:27:07,520 Speaker 1: So the longer you hold on to it, and this 561 00:27:07,600 --> 00:27:09,800 Speaker 1: is just very consistent when people are writing in with 562 00:27:10,240 --> 00:27:12,240 Speaker 1: things that have happened in the past, you have to 563 00:27:12,320 --> 00:27:15,200 Speaker 1: let go of it for yourself, not for your mom. 564 00:27:15,359 --> 00:27:17,960 Speaker 1: She is, you know, irrelevant in this scenario. But if 565 00:27:18,000 --> 00:27:21,639 Speaker 1: you if you harbor those feelings, you know, negative feelings 566 00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:24,440 Speaker 1: towards the circumstances you went through, Like Chelsea says, you 567 00:27:24,680 --> 00:27:26,520 Speaker 1: have to spin it and you have to make that 568 00:27:26,560 --> 00:27:28,080 Speaker 1: a positive thing. Like you went through all this so 569 00:27:28,080 --> 00:27:31,600 Speaker 1: hopefully help someone else. You know, these circumstances and situations 570 00:27:31,600 --> 00:27:34,800 Speaker 1: you're writing in, someone else is experiencing this and hopefully 571 00:27:34,840 --> 00:27:36,800 Speaker 1: we'll take something of it. Who's listening to say, like, oh, 572 00:27:36,800 --> 00:27:38,159 Speaker 1: I'm not going to do this. I'm not going to 573 00:27:38,240 --> 00:27:42,160 Speaker 1: try and change who I am for someone else exactly exactly, 574 00:27:42,160 --> 00:27:43,679 Speaker 1: and I think some of the hardest things, Like my 575 00:27:43,680 --> 00:27:45,600 Speaker 1: mom would even say some of the worst things. She 576 00:27:45,680 --> 00:27:47,240 Speaker 1: told me straight to my face, I'd rather have to 577 00:27:47,240 --> 00:27:49,800 Speaker 1: be a drug addictively gay. She told one of her 578 00:27:49,800 --> 00:27:51,399 Speaker 1: friends that this is where things that happens is my 579 00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:54,280 Speaker 1: brother daddy cancer. So all these comparisons, it's just like 580 00:27:54,560 --> 00:27:56,560 Speaker 1: what is honestly going through your own head? You know, 581 00:27:56,640 --> 00:27:58,199 Speaker 1: like that you have such a men, but you can 582 00:27:58,240 --> 00:28:01,000 Speaker 1: see how damaged that person and if they would really 583 00:28:01,000 --> 00:28:03,199 Speaker 1: want you to be a drug addict rather than just 584 00:28:03,240 --> 00:28:06,040 Speaker 1: be happy like who you fund does not affect her. 585 00:28:06,480 --> 00:28:08,119 Speaker 1: And that's just like the fact of the matter, and 586 00:28:08,160 --> 00:28:10,000 Speaker 1: that's something we all have to deal with in the 587 00:28:10,240 --> 00:28:13,000 Speaker 1: l g b t q I A community that why 588 00:28:13,320 --> 00:28:16,879 Speaker 1: is our personal life? So I a what wait, q 589 00:28:17,080 --> 00:28:20,280 Speaker 1: T what l g b t q I A lesbian, gay, 590 00:28:20,320 --> 00:28:26,439 Speaker 1: transgender a sexual intersects you? And now when they're not 591 00:28:26,480 --> 00:28:31,920 Speaker 1: a crossroad in sex intersex And then you said another letter, 592 00:28:32,119 --> 00:28:36,080 Speaker 1: lgbt q I A sexual. What did I miss him? There? 593 00:28:36,520 --> 00:28:39,920 Speaker 1: I missed something, Jonathan, lgbt q I A plus because 594 00:28:39,960 --> 00:28:42,880 Speaker 1: there's so many differences, you said, AI, and I was like, 595 00:28:42,960 --> 00:28:45,920 Speaker 1: I thought you met artificial we don't know, but we're 596 00:28:45,960 --> 00:28:48,640 Speaker 1: just everyone. I know, a I could be a thing 597 00:28:48,640 --> 00:28:50,920 Speaker 1: in the future. You never know. Yeah, you know that's 598 00:28:50,920 --> 00:28:53,120 Speaker 1: something also to hop on, Jonathan. Is that like when 599 00:28:53,160 --> 00:28:55,480 Speaker 1: somebody I also want to ask you about conversion therapy, 600 00:28:55,640 --> 00:28:59,880 Speaker 1: when somebody is really can't give you love or demonstrate love, 601 00:29:00,120 --> 00:29:02,960 Speaker 1: like that's about them, that's more of a reflection of 602 00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:05,440 Speaker 1: them than it has anything to do with you. And 603 00:29:05,480 --> 00:29:09,200 Speaker 1: then what goes on at conversion therapy, at Mike Penn's 604 00:29:09,240 --> 00:29:12,560 Speaker 1: conversion therapy. Oh God, I can't even deal with that guy. 605 00:29:12,680 --> 00:29:15,520 Speaker 1: But so with my mom. Luckily we don't have to anymore. 606 00:29:15,520 --> 00:29:17,320 Speaker 1: My mom would actually send me to our local church 607 00:29:17,400 --> 00:29:18,720 Speaker 1: and I was raised in tatch, Me, which is a 608 00:29:18,720 --> 00:29:23,200 Speaker 1: small town east of bakerstl, California, And pretty much they 609 00:29:23,280 --> 00:29:25,880 Speaker 1: just read me scriptures from the Bible over and over 610 00:29:25,960 --> 00:29:28,120 Speaker 1: and over again, saying this is wrong what you're doing. 611 00:29:28,320 --> 00:29:30,120 Speaker 1: You know, you need to change your ways, You're gonna 612 00:29:30,120 --> 00:29:32,120 Speaker 1: go to hell, like all this stuff, Like God, that 613 00:29:32,200 --> 00:29:35,560 Speaker 1: sounds like a fucking nightmare. Literally two hours a day, 614 00:29:35,600 --> 00:29:37,520 Speaker 1: and my mom sent me to go do that and 615 00:29:37,600 --> 00:29:40,080 Speaker 1: listening to people somebody reading the Bible. Can you think 616 00:29:40,080 --> 00:29:43,440 Speaker 1: of anything more unpleasant. No, but it is so damaging 617 00:29:43,520 --> 00:29:46,320 Speaker 1: to these I mean again, they're just trying to recondition 618 00:29:47,120 --> 00:29:49,960 Speaker 1: something that can't be reconditioned because it's not it's not 619 00:29:50,000 --> 00:29:54,000 Speaker 1: a learned habit, So it's not like a behavior like 620 00:29:54,040 --> 00:29:58,440 Speaker 1: you know, being kind to someone that hopefully you can yeah, 621 00:29:58,520 --> 00:30:02,200 Speaker 1: you threw certain exercises like this is really just it's 622 00:30:02,240 --> 00:30:05,920 Speaker 1: a mental breakdown that they're trying to kind of reduce 623 00:30:06,000 --> 00:30:10,280 Speaker 1: you to your smallest part. But the other aspect of 624 00:30:10,320 --> 00:30:12,000 Speaker 1: this was your relationship with your mom and if you 625 00:30:12,000 --> 00:30:15,000 Speaker 1: should give her another chance, and that's something that no 626 00:30:15,000 --> 00:30:16,920 Speaker 1: one can answer. It's something I go through with my 627 00:30:17,040 --> 00:30:19,360 Speaker 1: sisters on a daily basis because we all have a 628 00:30:19,440 --> 00:30:23,600 Speaker 1: very complicated relationship with my mom. And my response to 629 00:30:23,600 --> 00:30:25,000 Speaker 1: them is always when they call and ask what I 630 00:30:25,040 --> 00:30:27,360 Speaker 1: should do or what they should do in a certain situation, 631 00:30:27,520 --> 00:30:29,040 Speaker 1: is you have to do what feels right to you 632 00:30:29,040 --> 00:30:31,120 Speaker 1: in that moment, because I don't want to give you 633 00:30:31,440 --> 00:30:33,760 Speaker 1: my opinion because it's not how I'm feeling or what 634 00:30:33,800 --> 00:30:36,440 Speaker 1: I'm going through with her. So that's very personal to you. 635 00:30:36,800 --> 00:30:38,800 Speaker 1: But I would say you have to safeguard yourself, and 636 00:30:38,840 --> 00:30:41,560 Speaker 1: that's what I do. So you only give her so 637 00:30:41,680 --> 00:30:46,160 Speaker 1: much so she can't habitually hurt you. And you also 638 00:30:46,200 --> 00:30:48,200 Speaker 1: don't want someone like that to be able to leverage 639 00:30:48,240 --> 00:30:51,400 Speaker 1: your insecurity or your what they perceive as your weaknesses 640 00:30:51,640 --> 00:30:54,640 Speaker 1: to get what they want. So it's all about how 641 00:30:54,680 --> 00:30:57,520 Speaker 1: you enter those interactions and the circumstances you set. So 642 00:30:57,600 --> 00:31:00,480 Speaker 1: for me, like if I was in your position, what 643 00:31:00,560 --> 00:31:03,320 Speaker 1: I would say is until you can verbally accept who 644 00:31:03,360 --> 00:31:05,480 Speaker 1: I am and who I'm going to be with, there 645 00:31:05,600 --> 00:31:08,760 Speaker 1: is no relationship. Definitely, Like that is that is the basis, 646 00:31:08,800 --> 00:31:10,880 Speaker 1: Like that's the least you could do. And once you 647 00:31:10,880 --> 00:31:13,120 Speaker 1: could do that, then we can move forward. And it's 648 00:31:13,160 --> 00:31:15,720 Speaker 1: not going to be easy, but at least then you 649 00:31:15,800 --> 00:31:20,520 Speaker 1: are on level footing with your sexuality. If that's the 650 00:31:20,520 --> 00:31:22,800 Speaker 1: catalyst for all these issues, she either needs to accept 651 00:31:22,800 --> 00:31:24,600 Speaker 1: it or don't. Definitely, And I think the hard part 652 00:31:24,640 --> 00:31:27,240 Speaker 1: is now because so she moved from California all way 653 00:31:27,240 --> 00:31:30,080 Speaker 1: to Wyoming, so she's living her best life there, but 654 00:31:30,200 --> 00:31:35,000 Speaker 1: her my STI my sister all converted to Mormonism. So okay, 655 00:31:35,600 --> 00:31:38,120 Speaker 1: so boring. I have Mormon's in my family. My mom 656 00:31:38,200 --> 00:31:41,200 Speaker 1: was Mormon and my sister was Mormon. She's slowly snapping 657 00:31:41,200 --> 00:31:45,520 Speaker 1: out of it. But my best girlfriend is Mormon and 658 00:31:45,560 --> 00:31:48,040 Speaker 1: she's very Yeah, she lives in a suburb and she 659 00:31:49,440 --> 00:31:52,520 Speaker 1: but she flies a rainbow flag every year for me 660 00:31:52,560 --> 00:31:55,560 Speaker 1: and my partner. Like, she's very progressive. So it seems 661 00:31:55,560 --> 00:31:58,440 Speaker 1: like your mom was like off her rocker before the Mormonism. 662 00:31:58,560 --> 00:32:00,720 Speaker 1: So I mean, it seems like it's probably not going 663 00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:04,280 Speaker 1: to help, but that's something personal to her that like 664 00:32:04,320 --> 00:32:08,800 Speaker 1: no religion should impact her feelings towards her son exactly exactly, 665 00:32:09,240 --> 00:32:11,360 Speaker 1: So Mormon or not, she's dealing with some ship of 666 00:32:11,360 --> 00:32:13,560 Speaker 1: her own. Yeah, yeah, And that's like, you know, growing 667 00:32:13,600 --> 00:32:15,560 Speaker 1: up to listen to Sean Hannity every day, like, and 668 00:32:15,560 --> 00:32:17,560 Speaker 1: I think it was hard because she would always you know, 669 00:32:17,640 --> 00:32:19,520 Speaker 1: use the word fact getting stuff and like me sitting 670 00:32:19,520 --> 00:32:21,200 Speaker 1: in the next her in the car, just knowing what 671 00:32:21,240 --> 00:32:23,360 Speaker 1: her feelings are. I'm like, she's talking about me. And 672 00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:25,880 Speaker 1: so I never brought it up to her attention growing 673 00:32:25,960 --> 00:32:28,080 Speaker 1: up and stuff or you know, I always add even 674 00:32:28,160 --> 00:32:29,680 Speaker 1: had like to hide my voice, could always felt it 675 00:32:29,680 --> 00:32:32,160 Speaker 1: was too feminine and things like that. So now that 676 00:32:32,160 --> 00:32:34,320 Speaker 1: I'm out, though, I'm like so happy and proud, Like 677 00:32:34,720 --> 00:32:36,560 Speaker 1: I've never been happier. I've been healthier. I have never 678 00:32:36,600 --> 00:32:39,000 Speaker 1: been healthier. And yeah, you look healthy and you look 679 00:32:39,040 --> 00:32:41,280 Speaker 1: like you have like a good amount of self confidence. 680 00:32:41,320 --> 00:32:44,320 Speaker 1: So like, go with that. Yeah, don't let her bad 681 00:32:44,360 --> 00:32:47,960 Speaker 1: state of affairs affect your positivity and your vibe, you know, 682 00:32:48,080 --> 00:32:50,920 Speaker 1: because all you can control is your reaction, and so 683 00:32:51,120 --> 00:32:53,560 Speaker 1: let her do her thing, and when she earns the 684 00:32:53,640 --> 00:32:57,400 Speaker 1: right to probably be around you, you'll know exactly. And um, 685 00:32:57,440 --> 00:32:58,880 Speaker 1: you know, I remember some of the things she would 686 00:32:58,880 --> 00:32:59,920 Speaker 1: tell me. She's like, you know, you're not going to 687 00:33:00,000 --> 00:33:03,000 Speaker 1: successful in life. I just graduated last year's my bachelor's, 688 00:33:03,040 --> 00:33:04,920 Speaker 1: I'm doing my masters right now. So it's like, you 689 00:33:04,920 --> 00:33:07,680 Speaker 1: know what, congratulations you guys. And I'm like, you know, 690 00:33:07,920 --> 00:33:09,720 Speaker 1: proving it to myself also, you know, in a way, 691 00:33:09,720 --> 00:33:12,000 Speaker 1: it's kind of like in my background, proving her wrong too, 692 00:33:12,000 --> 00:33:14,160 Speaker 1: So it's like, you know, what's step out of time 693 00:33:14,360 --> 00:33:17,320 Speaker 1: doing things for myself and making myself better. Yeah, well, 694 00:33:17,360 --> 00:33:19,480 Speaker 1: good for you. That's so unfortunate that you have to 695 00:33:19,520 --> 00:33:21,680 Speaker 1: go prove your mother wrong. But you know what, sometimes 696 00:33:21,680 --> 00:33:24,479 Speaker 1: it's just the motivation you need exactly. I love it 697 00:33:24,520 --> 00:33:26,880 Speaker 1: all right, Well, shaba Alm, it was great talking to you. 698 00:33:27,080 --> 00:33:28,640 Speaker 1: The pleasure talking to you guys, thank you guys so 699 00:33:28,720 --> 00:33:32,320 Speaker 1: much for your time, and I appreciate Yeah, bye, Jonathan. 700 00:33:33,320 --> 00:33:36,360 Speaker 1: I feel like we're saving the world, Brandon, one gay 701 00:33:36,400 --> 00:33:38,440 Speaker 1: man at a time, hopefully. I mean, there are just 702 00:33:38,480 --> 00:33:40,120 Speaker 1: so many issues in the gay community that could be 703 00:33:40,120 --> 00:33:43,720 Speaker 1: an entire episode. Well obviously, I mean, yeah, it's a 704 00:33:43,760 --> 00:33:45,800 Speaker 1: lot to unpack. I mean I still deal with it 705 00:33:45,840 --> 00:33:47,920 Speaker 1: on a daily basis. But what kind of issues are 706 00:33:47,920 --> 00:33:49,720 Speaker 1: you dealing with on a daily basis? I mean, like 707 00:33:49,760 --> 00:33:51,600 Speaker 1: body issues. I think that's a huge one in the 708 00:33:51,600 --> 00:33:54,640 Speaker 1: gay community, just the expectation of what you should look like, 709 00:33:55,280 --> 00:33:59,280 Speaker 1: because most gay men are under armored mannequins brought to life, 710 00:33:59,400 --> 00:34:01,880 Speaker 1: right right, Well, same thing for girls. You know, who's 711 00:34:01,880 --> 00:34:05,440 Speaker 1: not suffering from that body dysmorphia and body image problems? 712 00:34:05,480 --> 00:34:09,080 Speaker 1: White males and white men, white men over fifty, they're 713 00:34:09,080 --> 00:34:11,520 Speaker 1: not suffering from that. There's nothing more upsetting to me 714 00:34:11,560 --> 00:34:15,040 Speaker 1: than when I see this beautiful woman who you know 715 00:34:15,239 --> 00:34:19,839 Speaker 1: takes the time to maintain herself. It's you And they 716 00:34:19,880 --> 00:34:22,160 Speaker 1: have to fuck these men who they married twenty years ago, 717 00:34:22,200 --> 00:34:23,799 Speaker 1: who are probably like fine shape, but then just let 718 00:34:23,840 --> 00:34:25,920 Speaker 1: themselves go like, oh it's not my it's a woman's 719 00:34:25,920 --> 00:34:28,560 Speaker 1: responsibility to uphold herself. But I can look like a 720 00:34:28,920 --> 00:34:32,759 Speaker 1: garbage back fucking pig. It's my legs splayed open on 721 00:34:32,800 --> 00:34:35,920 Speaker 1: a sofa, you know. Like men should do whatever they 722 00:34:35,920 --> 00:34:38,480 Speaker 1: can to avoid women from ever seeing the outline of 723 00:34:38,480 --> 00:34:40,839 Speaker 1: the other balls. And that means sitting in a way 724 00:34:40,880 --> 00:34:43,319 Speaker 1: that no one will see your balls. And when men 725 00:34:43,440 --> 00:34:47,160 Speaker 1: disrespect that silent rule that we thought we had an agreement, 726 00:34:47,280 --> 00:34:50,480 Speaker 1: but we don't. As usual, it's just just another thing 727 00:34:50,520 --> 00:34:52,719 Speaker 1: that men don't want to be understanding. That's why you 728 00:34:52,719 --> 00:34:54,359 Speaker 1: can't have a lazy boy in your house. I mean, 729 00:34:54,360 --> 00:34:57,239 Speaker 1: as soon as you incorporate a fucking recliner, yeah, then 730 00:34:57,400 --> 00:35:01,040 Speaker 1: things get real dicey, real fast. I bet your dad 731 00:35:01,040 --> 00:35:03,480 Speaker 1: out of recliner. He did my dad out of recliner, 732 00:35:03,520 --> 00:35:06,839 Speaker 1: of course he did. Oh yeah. I could just see 733 00:35:06,920 --> 00:35:09,560 Speaker 1: him sitting in that right now. That is the furniture 734 00:35:09,920 --> 00:35:12,840 Speaker 1: embodiment of men. He would sit there on a Sunday 735 00:35:12,880 --> 00:35:15,520 Speaker 1: morning with like a bagel, you know. My mom would 736 00:35:15,560 --> 00:35:17,799 Speaker 1: make him a bagel with like locks and cream cheese, 737 00:35:17,800 --> 00:35:19,520 Speaker 1: and he would put it on the armchair, have the 738 00:35:19,520 --> 00:35:22,320 Speaker 1: New York Times splayed out, and just be like sitting 739 00:35:22,360 --> 00:35:24,520 Speaker 1: there like a fucking king, you know, well, my mom 740 00:35:24,640 --> 00:35:27,879 Speaker 1: did everything and we had a nice lazy Sunday, but 741 00:35:28,239 --> 00:35:30,600 Speaker 1: just eating, you know, putting the plate on his stomach 742 00:35:30,800 --> 00:35:33,520 Speaker 1: and then reading the paper all at the same time. 743 00:35:34,040 --> 00:35:36,240 Speaker 1: Oh you know what I just thought of? So girls, 744 00:35:36,800 --> 00:35:41,200 Speaker 1: these men who like in the gym, in the locker room, 745 00:35:41,320 --> 00:35:43,399 Speaker 1: these older men who walk around, you know, they're doing 746 00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:45,200 Speaker 1: it at their house too. Is they put these boxes 747 00:35:45,239 --> 00:35:47,360 Speaker 1: on and they're like balls or can you not please? 748 00:35:47,440 --> 00:35:49,160 Speaker 1: I don't. I don't want to even have this kind 749 00:35:49,160 --> 00:35:51,320 Speaker 1: of imagery right now. I mean I just said I 750 00:35:51,320 --> 00:35:53,520 Speaker 1: don't want to talk about balls at all, and now 751 00:35:53,560 --> 00:35:57,279 Speaker 1: you're making me think at around. As soon as you 752 00:35:57,280 --> 00:36:00,239 Speaker 1: say old men and lockers, I think of ball plison. 753 00:36:00,280 --> 00:36:03,040 Speaker 1: I don't want to. So let's steer this in a 754 00:36:03,040 --> 00:36:05,279 Speaker 1: different direction. Well it's actually a rap on the show 755 00:36:05,280 --> 00:36:09,239 Speaker 1: for today. Okay, Well that's perfect timing. So let's go 756 00:36:09,280 --> 00:36:12,879 Speaker 1: out on that no balls Thursday. For anyone who does 757 00:36:13,080 --> 00:36:15,800 Speaker 1: want to write in, they can do that at Dear 758 00:36:15,880 --> 00:36:19,320 Speaker 1: Chelsea Project d E A R C H E L 759 00:36:19,680 --> 00:36:22,759 Speaker 1: S E A P R O j E C T 760 00:36:22,960 --> 00:36:26,080 Speaker 1: at gmail dot com. Dear Chelsea Project at gmail dot com. 761 00:36:26,080 --> 00:36:26,840 Speaker 1: That's wonderful