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Speaker 1: The Nicky Glazer Podcast. Nick Here's Nicky. Hello here I am.

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Speaker 1: It's Nicky Glazer podcast. I'm Nicky Glazer. I am in St. Louis.

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Speaker 1: Andrew's in St. Louis. We're in the same building. We

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Speaker 1: are not in the same room because we are not

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Speaker 1: getting along. No, it's not that it's uh covidy issues um.

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Speaker 1: And then Noah is in Arizona. It is wednest day sow.

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Speaker 1: I say it in my head every time I write it,

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Speaker 1: so that I say it, write it right. Wednesday is

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Speaker 1: a hard one, so Brett like when you're a little

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Speaker 1: kid learning things, and Tuesday is not easier either. Tuesday

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Speaker 1: you would just think it's t us when you're a

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Speaker 1: little kid. I would always say to it, Oh, have

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Speaker 1: you ever seen the TikTok where they're like, uh, they

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Speaker 1: hold up cards for a girl to say, and they're

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Speaker 1: like t w I and she's like tweet there t

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Speaker 1: w A, and then there t w U two, and

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Speaker 1: then t w oh she's like two, and everyone last

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Speaker 1: she said like twe what two? And then you really

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Speaker 1: examine it, You're like, two is such a weird word

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Speaker 1: to spell it that way. There's no other t w

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Speaker 1: words that just go too yeah, trying to think tot twat,

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Speaker 1: tot no, it's all twitch, you know. I think they

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Speaker 1: just ran out of I think I think t O

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Speaker 1: and t O O was first, and then they were like, well,

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Speaker 1: we gotta it could have been any word. It could

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Speaker 1: have been. It could have been one, get three. I

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Speaker 1: don't know why they're not having three letters and things.

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Speaker 1: What do you mean why not t O O O

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Speaker 1: three vowels? Just three letters? I mean it's a lot,

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Speaker 1: it's a letter to Why don't we just do? I

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Speaker 1: mean that's what I was. I had written in my phone,

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Speaker 1: you know how sometimes you write like a joke, idea

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Speaker 1: or whatever, and I just have tired with thirty seven

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Speaker 1: d's And I remembered, I keep going, what does that mean?

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Speaker 1: Tired with thirty seven d s? And then I realized

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Speaker 1: it was like part of my joke making fun of

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Speaker 1: young girls and how their instagrams do that little thing

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Speaker 1: where they're just like they just like twitch a little

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Speaker 1: bit and like the hair falls in their face and

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Speaker 1: it's it's like a boomerang, but it's even it's a

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Speaker 1: micro second. It's not even a it's not a boomerang,

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Speaker 1: is like a full second. These are like microL and

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Speaker 1: then they always write like I'm tired with like thirties

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Speaker 1: seventies and thirty seventies is also the size of their

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Speaker 1: bra and then the viral for it and then be

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Speaker 1: able like dude, it's like genius. But yeah, there there

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Speaker 1: is something about writing multiple letters in a thing that

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Speaker 1: conveys tone via texting, you know, yeah, I feel like

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Speaker 1: when people, um, I'm right out okay, not just UK,

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Speaker 1: I don't know okay, yeah, or like the O n K,

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Speaker 1: which one seems more passive aggressive to you okay without

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Speaker 1: an exclamation mark is hell. It's the man of affirmative answers.

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Speaker 1: Okay spelled out too makes it feel It makes it

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Speaker 1: feel like a grade school teacher, like it just seems

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Speaker 1: so grammatically correct okay, because that is how you spell okay.

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Speaker 1: Abby always writes out okay in our messages, and I

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Speaker 1: always read it like okay, and it wasn't we give

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Speaker 1: so much tone to things like I just wrote. My

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Speaker 1: assistant is having to change like a million flights because

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Speaker 1: of just me you canceling my l a upping everything,

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Speaker 1: and um, it's like her job now is just like

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Speaker 1: calling airlines and saying like, we didn't mean to book

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Speaker 1: that flight. Can we get a refund? And um, she

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Speaker 1: had to do it again this morning because I found

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Speaker 1: it cheaper flights somewhere that was not available yesterday. And

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Speaker 1: I just wrote back to her, fuck, like god, this

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Speaker 1: is your job now, like you, I'm so sorry, and

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Speaker 1: she just goes, what's wrong because so it's like, oh no, no,

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Speaker 1: I just meant like I was just like sharing your

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Speaker 1: consternation that you probably have, and she's like okay, And

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Speaker 1: so I just made things worse by being like fuck

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Speaker 1: because she thought something on my end happened. How do

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Speaker 1: you feel about voice memos? Um, I'm a fan in

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Speaker 1: the sense that things don't get lost in text lation. Yes,

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Speaker 1: you know, so you can. There's no tone and text

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Speaker 1: usually people go to the worst tone possible unless you

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Speaker 1: add an L O L and an emoji. There's so

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Speaker 1: many times I add an L O L when there's

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Speaker 1: not no need for an L O L. But the

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Speaker 1: thing is that doesn't mean laugh out loud anymore. It

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Speaker 1: just means don't read this in a sarcastic or that's

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Speaker 1: what it means. It's almost like the italics of it's

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Speaker 1: just a way to like or or an exclamation mark

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Speaker 1: really does that too, I think, but l O L

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Speaker 1: makes it so gentle. Thank God for l O. I mean,

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Speaker 1: we can roll our eyes about like oh, it's not

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Speaker 1: really laughing. It a loud but that's what it is.

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Speaker 1: It's just a short cut to be like, I come

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Speaker 1: in peace. It's like, um, it's the same way when

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Speaker 1: you get someone and you either go or you go

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Speaker 1: like yeah, yeah, that's a fun little honk when you

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Speaker 1: like if you have a like like a just like

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Speaker 1: can you just move like a look, can there between

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Speaker 1: excuse me and someone in line and go oh excuse me.

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Speaker 1: The problem is, though, is either A they won't hear

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Speaker 1: the ha, so then you go again it and then

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Speaker 1: you got to go another and then they lose their

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Speaker 1: mind because it's like seven has which equals one huge ha. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I hate getting at no matter what I mean. Usually

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Speaker 1: they're right because I'm checking my phone and when I'm

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Speaker 1: at a stoplight and they're probably in a hurry when

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Speaker 1: they want to get there point zero seven seconds earlier

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Speaker 1: than they would if I wasn't checking my phone. But

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Speaker 1: they're right, and I always kind of look up and

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Speaker 1: I go, oh, my God, you're right. And then I'm

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Speaker 1: kind of embarrassed when they drive past me, and then

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Speaker 1: they're embarrassed when I get right next to them at

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Speaker 1: the next light. You know, the rules of the roads

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Speaker 1: of the road. Man, you forget all about it when

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Speaker 1: when you live in New York City, you forget like

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Speaker 1: driving and like just rules of the road. Like just

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Speaker 1: I don't know, it's interesting that I went ten years

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Speaker 1: without a car, like in my thirties. That's weird. I

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Speaker 1: love driving so much, it's the best I miss it.

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Speaker 1: Um are you thinking pan attacks driving on the highway

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Speaker 1: sometimes in Florida? Like I don't know. Um, well, you

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Speaker 1: were getting panic attacks for everything? Kind of I got

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Speaker 1: panic attacks like ride not you know my version of that,

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Speaker 1: I don't want to it's not the same as other people's.

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Speaker 1: But like, yeah, riding in cars and not having control.

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Speaker 1: But but you driving yourself, that would be horrifying to

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Speaker 1: get a panic attack while you're in control of a

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Speaker 1: heavy machine. Almost like both Burnham saying he gets panic

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Speaker 1: attacks while he's on stage. You go, how could that happen?

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Speaker 1: See one time? I got not one time? Multiple times? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: on the highways. Then part of you wants to get

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Speaker 1: off the highway to get rid of it, and the

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Speaker 1: other party wants to drive faster to get home quicker

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Speaker 1: one on the bridge once. No, that was Truman Show.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, that is the That's my one of

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Speaker 1: my favorite movies. I have to remember that next time

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Speaker 1: people are like, what's your favorite movie? Do you ever

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Speaker 1: like just struggle to remember anything that is your favorite

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Speaker 1: when people seem to ask you for it every time time. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: we started with that on the show when we do

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Speaker 1: best Best Worst uff you. Yeah, and it's one of

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Speaker 1: my favorite segments, by the way, Bottom one, Top one,

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Speaker 1: Bottom one. I just want to give a shout out

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Speaker 1: to the besties on Reddit who posted a thread about

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Speaker 1: all of our top one, bottom one, saying it would

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Speaker 1: be a great board game. Oh and they put it

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Speaker 1: all together. Yeah, and they put it all together and

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Speaker 1: like I have it in a spreadsheet, but it's all

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Speaker 1: spread out, but to like see it together. I love them.

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Speaker 1: I don't go and Reddit, and I'm sorry that I

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Speaker 1: don't get to go over to our thing. It's just

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Speaker 1: to protect myself in case one douchebag says something wrong

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Speaker 1: and it sucks that but you know that I'm in

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Speaker 1: so many communications with besties on my d M s

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Speaker 1: and that I feel like I am I am accessible

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Speaker 1: to you guys. Um, if you really need me, I

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Speaker 1: always will be. UM. I love uh the post we

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Speaker 1: got on that you reposted that I hadn't seen yet

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Speaker 1: on our Nikki Glazer pod Instagram. No, I'm guessing you

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Speaker 1: reposted the people with the merch like doing little dances

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Speaker 1: and like so proud to be wearing the merch. It

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Speaker 1: really touched me in a way that like, I don't know,

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Speaker 1: I don't know how to describe it. It's different than

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Speaker 1: I've been having fans for almost twenty years now, and

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Speaker 1: it's just a different It's just different. It feels so good,

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Speaker 1: it's so cute, and I know what that feels like

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Speaker 1: to be a fan of a show or like, um,

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Speaker 1: just you know two three people like I just I

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Speaker 1: know what it's like. So it Um, I guess it

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Speaker 1: hits different. It's just so sweet. So thank you to

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Speaker 1: everyone who bought merch, and thank you to everyone who

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Speaker 1: you know participates in spreading the word of the show,

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Speaker 1: spreading the good word. I mean, we met a lot

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Speaker 1: of busties this past weekend Austin Um, which we couldn't

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Speaker 1: do meet and greets in Austin because it was a festival,

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Speaker 1: so I apologized to any busties that were there. Um.

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Speaker 1: And then we saw something that drove by us late

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Speaker 1: at night. Remember that, Andrew, Yeah, yeah, it's funny, a

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Speaker 1: little drive by shout out. That's always fun. And then

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Speaker 1: um something because Houston, they weren't feeling they peeled a little.

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Speaker 1: It was a little peel. No. We met some really good,

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Speaker 1: uh good fans and sweeties um out there, and I

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Speaker 1: meant to remember their names and I remember faces though.

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Speaker 1: It's just nice. Um. It's cool when like you don't

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Speaker 1: expect like someone to be a fan and then you're

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Speaker 1: like really what, like, yeah, how did we end up

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Speaker 1: in your life? Like? Who was the girl that was

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Speaker 1: first in line in Dallas? What was her name? She

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Speaker 1: was fun? She was so funny. She was she was

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Speaker 1: like what she's such a huge fan. She she starts

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Speaker 1: out what I mean, Andrew, do you remember what it

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Speaker 1: started out as It started out as like, oh, no,

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Speaker 1: this girl is gonna be trouble, but then it quickly

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Speaker 1: turned into no, she is just excited and I love

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Speaker 1: her energy. And she was saying she's referencing a lot

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Speaker 1: of inside jokes. She was by herself, or maybe she

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Speaker 1: was with a friend, but her friend had removed herself

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Speaker 1: from the situation to be not embarrassed because she was

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Speaker 1: freaking out. And she's like, no, Andrew, you need to

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Speaker 1: get in this picture too, because Andrew is taking pictures.

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Speaker 1: What Andrew, do you remember what she said? She's like,

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Speaker 1: I love you, Brenna kisses, I love you. Oh, I

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Speaker 1: love the show somewhere like, yeah, a lot of Hamdred.

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Speaker 1: We got a lot of hamdre. It's like just sometimes

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Speaker 1: they're like, whisper it else? I remember she had the

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Speaker 1: curse cut? Ever, what was it again? She she had,

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, this was my favorite cut ever heard

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Speaker 1: because it involves could It's like an inception cup. So

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Speaker 1: she would listen to our podcast in front of her

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Speaker 1: ex boyfriend. I believe is what the case was, and

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Speaker 1: she or no. She would say around her ex boyfriend.

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Speaker 1: She would call it things out for being in front

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Speaker 1: of him, not things that he was doing, things that

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Speaker 1: she would see and he never asked what it meant.

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Speaker 1: You don't know what could means. Yet your girlfriend's using this.

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Speaker 1: You are trying to act like you might even know

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Speaker 1: it or you don't care. That was so cut. I

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Speaker 1: fucking loved that cut so much. And then she was

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Speaker 1: calling herself cut about something and I go, no, you

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Speaker 1: were not. Oh no, there was something she did that

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Speaker 1: was kind of that. Maybe it was in the audience

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Speaker 1: that night or something. She was like and I was

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Speaker 1: cut in this way, and I was like, yeah, that

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Speaker 1: is cut, but like, but that was so funny to

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Speaker 1: me that because I've done that before where I'm trying

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Speaker 1: to get my boyfriend's attention, not my boyfriend now, but

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Speaker 1: like you know other boyfriends. He's the only boyfriend never

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Speaker 1: ever had so choice him. Um uh no, I've tried

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Speaker 1: to get attention by doing something and then they don't

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Speaker 1: pick up on it, and you're like, can't, like you

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Speaker 1: know this thing is like you've never heard of it

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Speaker 1: before or you've never like come on, yeah, there's a

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Speaker 1: I think she was called herself for Alfa being cooked

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Speaker 1: because you know I post I posted that thing on

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Speaker 1: Instagram where like light laughers or whatever. So now I

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Speaker 1: think like people think they have to laugh too loud

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Speaker 1: for me, Like I'm like a like a make a

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Speaker 1: wish kind of kid, and I'm like They're like, we

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Speaker 1: laughed so loud that I think it was like annoying

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Speaker 1: people how loud we were laughing. I was like, no,

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Speaker 1: it's like I don't I get it that you're being

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Speaker 1: very nice, but like I don't need the charity laugh

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Speaker 1: of like I gave it extra for yet, like patting

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Speaker 1: me on the top of the head, like for your

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Speaker 1: little pow boy, and it's like, yeah, that was nice. Laughs. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I just want people to laugh exactly the amount they

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Speaker 1: want to. That's why I blurn my eyes because when

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Speaker 1: you look at people, they just they it's a it's

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Speaker 1: a tactic to get them to laugh harder. Well, you

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Speaker 1: have to, it's up. I want I have the I

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Speaker 1: try to have the lights down. I try to never

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Speaker 1: go out in the audience because I never want to

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Speaker 1: put pressure on people to have a better time than

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Speaker 1: they are. Really. I want people to have an authentic

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Speaker 1: experience where they don't feel pressured to do anything they

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Speaker 1: don't want to do. And there's something so great about

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Speaker 1: eliciting laughs from people that could have could easily not laugh,

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Speaker 1: you know, like there's something so special when you know

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Speaker 1: when you're in a setting like that, there are so

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Speaker 1: many factors that play into why are you laugh or

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Speaker 1: why you don't laugh? Like you know, in comedy clubs,

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Speaker 1: everyone's bunched up as close as possible to the front

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Speaker 1: because laughter is contagious and it will it will make

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Speaker 1: you laugh if people are laughing and having a good time.

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Speaker 1: We've talked about some of the tricks, laughing at your

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Speaker 1: own jokes, having little like cues like slapping your knee

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Speaker 1: with a microphone like Chappelle does, Like there's little things

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Speaker 1: that can make the audience, like you know, lacing your

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Speaker 1: material with the word fuck like doing there's certain trick

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Speaker 1: and there's also tricks that I'm employing throughout my set

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Speaker 1: that you know, are just the ways that comedians learn

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Speaker 1: how to talk in a way that's funnier than not talk.

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Speaker 1: Like I've learned, it's funnier for me to go like

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Speaker 1: because old Glaze Dog needs at that instead of saying

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Speaker 1: because I need to hear compliments, for me to say,

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Speaker 1: for me to button up a joke about compliments that

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Speaker 1: has no punchline, and I just finished it with like,

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Speaker 1: because you know what, Old Glaze Dog needs a gobent

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Speaker 1: that is funnier the amazing because I need a compliment.

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Speaker 1: You know, there's tricks like that, but then there's really

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Speaker 1: deliberate ones that are just gross. Um. But I always

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Speaker 1: am very touched when people have been watching say they

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Speaker 1: watch something online or like on TV, and they're like,

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Speaker 1: you had me like laughing alone in my apartment because

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Speaker 1: there's no pressure on you to do that. Do you

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Speaker 1: ever laugh alone, like when you're watching What was the

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Speaker 1: last time you really like laughed at something by yourself?

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Speaker 1: This is like one of those top one bottom one

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Speaker 1: moments where I have no idea. But the last season

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Speaker 1: of Curb Your Enthusiasm, when I was okay, yeah, that's

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Speaker 1: about I mean, you know that is the Woody Harrelson episode.

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Speaker 1: I laughed the hard, Oh my god about him going

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Speaker 1: out to the farm and like the cow and stuff.

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Speaker 1: I laughed so hard at Molly Shannon's book. Andrew caught

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Speaker 1: me on the plane laughing to myself because I couldn't

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Speaker 1: help it. I read that book in two days. I

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Speaker 1: am bragging. I fucking sped through it. It's a it's

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Speaker 1: a big book and I read it. All is so good.

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Speaker 1: It's called Hello Molly. I really recommend it for a

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Speaker 1: Mother's Day gift because it's all about her losing her

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Speaker 1: mom at a young age and how her dad ended

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Speaker 1: up being like her mother, and how that relationship is

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Speaker 1: kind of sucked up. But it would be a really

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Speaker 1: good gift for mother's I think, even though it's a

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Speaker 1: tragic loss of a mom at the age of like six,

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Speaker 1: she was because it's about in the you know, it's

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Speaker 1: about her living her life to make her mom proud,

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Speaker 1: even though her mom was never there. So it's a

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Speaker 1: beauty and it's a beautiful gift to give a woman

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Speaker 1: because it's a really triumphant story about a woman who

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Speaker 1: kind of a self made comedian like Superstar six, Superstar success,

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Speaker 1: Like it's so beautiful. But I was laughing and the

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Speaker 1: book made me cry within ten pages, like so so crying.

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Speaker 1: It's really sad what happened to her and her family.

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Speaker 1: You should read it to find out. It's called Hello

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Speaker 1: Molly Um. But I was laughing so hard at one

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Speaker 1: part Andrew looked over me at me on the plane,

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Speaker 1: and I wasn't trying to be like I'm laughing at

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Speaker 1: a book. I'm smart. I was just laughing because she

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Speaker 1: was describing the sketches. It was her The SNL chapters

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Speaker 1: and she was describing some of the segments that I

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Speaker 1: had never even seen, like or I couldn't remember. I

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Speaker 1: didn't remember Sally O'Malley, who is this woman that was

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Speaker 1: based off of Her friend went to go like sign

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Speaker 1: up for equinox or something, and her friend said that

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Speaker 1: this woman was showing around and she was like, listen,

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Speaker 1: I'm fifty and I can I can kick, and I

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Speaker 1: can splits. I'm fifty. This is the way a woman

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Speaker 1: who's fifty. And so she created this character who was like,

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Speaker 1: and I can kick and I can stretch, and I'm fifty.

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Speaker 1: And so I was laughing so hard. Then I looked

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Speaker 1: up all these sketches and I'm dying because it's there

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Speaker 1: were so many. It's so funny to read about sketches,

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Speaker 1: ones that you remember. Also once I was desperate too.

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Speaker 1: I can only find transcripts of because she was like,

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Speaker 1: you know, there's this one sketch where we were working

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Speaker 1: at a Friday's and the way Will Ferrell said Welcome

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Speaker 1: to Friday has made me laugh so hard, or like

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Speaker 1: the way he said I'm Gerald, uh you know, uh Cunningham.

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Speaker 1: The third Welcome to t G I Friday. She was

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Speaker 1: like I cracked up. I broke and so I'm looking

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Speaker 1: for t J at Friday's Will Ferrell Molly Shannon. I

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Speaker 1: can't find it, so I just find the transcript. But it's, Um,

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Speaker 1: it's really I I really went through a depression after

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Speaker 1: reading that book because I lost my friend Molly, who

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Speaker 1: was talking to me for two days like straight. It's

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Speaker 1: it's a real thing that happens to me with books

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Speaker 1: that are really really good. In that one, I like

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Speaker 1: suffered for a couple of days afterwards of being like,

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Speaker 1: I wish I could talk to my friend and she

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Speaker 1: has my friends she gave you know, she reached out

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Speaker 1: to me on d M. But I don't want to

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Speaker 1: bother her. But I fucking love that book so much. Um,

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Speaker 1: and I want to talk to you when we get

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Speaker 1: back from break next week. A week from tomorrow, I am.

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Speaker 1: It's Nicki Glazer Day in St. Louis, and I'm doing

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Speaker 1: something very special when we're gonna talk about when we

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Speaker 1: get back. Andrew, Hey, everyone, come on down, down and

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Speaker 1: I found out. Now come down, frown calf down. We're back.

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Speaker 1: Um this weekend, we're going to be in New Orleans

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Speaker 1: Friday or Thursday night. One of the either Fort Lauderdale

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Speaker 1: or Jacksonville Friday night, m either Fort Lauderdale or Jacksonville

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Speaker 1: Saturday night and then Jacket okay Friday, yeah, okay, twenty

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Speaker 1: twond is Fort Lauderdale. I think that's Friday Friday, uh,

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Speaker 1: and then jackson Saturday and Nashville on Now, Andrew is,

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Speaker 1: are we gonna have any family coming out to these shows?

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Speaker 1: It's for Villa and sent and it was close to

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Speaker 1: where you come from and Port Luisie. You know my

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Speaker 1: boy in Nashville, Jake Owen plus one think one's coming out.

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Speaker 1: He's bringing the whole honky talk William. Oh, you know

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Speaker 1: what I'm gonna You know, I'm gonna ask Jake going

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Speaker 1: about something that I've been bothering you about before. Oh shit,

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Speaker 1: you know. I did a deep dive as I do

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Speaker 1: about Taylor Swift and who she's dating, who different songs

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Speaker 1: are about. And I did read that she wrote one

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Speaker 1: song about Jake Owen. I believe I forget what will

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Speaker 1: you look up? Noah, which song that is? I don't

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Speaker 1: know why I'm talking about Dr Phil I am doing

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Speaker 1: his podcast later today. Um I will be on Dr

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Speaker 1: Phields podcast. I will be on. Asked Chelsea that podcast

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Speaker 1: is coming up soon. Whitney Cummings that podcast is up already,

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Speaker 1: the one that we talked family consolations. I have like

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Speaker 1: forty five minutes left. Oh my god, so you have

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Speaker 1: one tenth of it left. It's so I'm so glad.

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Speaker 1: It's great. Whitney and I both we have this thing

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Speaker 1: that after a podcast we've done. I've done her podcast

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Speaker 1: now four or five times. After a podcast, we always

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Speaker 1: walk out and we go that was that was like

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Speaker 1: not good? Right? And I go listen, it doesn't even matter, like,

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Speaker 1: you don't have to put it up, and she goes,

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Speaker 1: I just was like, not present. I just got some

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Speaker 1: bad family news, which she talks about on the show,

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Speaker 1: so I'm not divulging anything that she didn't divulge. And

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Speaker 1: she's like, and I go, you don't have to put

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Speaker 1: it up, Like, I just want to hang out with you.

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Speaker 1: I don't care if you like we can just trash

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Speaker 1: it like that. Sometimes you do a bad podcast and

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Speaker 1: we're both like was that bad? And then Emily, her producer,

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Speaker 1: is like no, it was good, and we're like no that,

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Speaker 1: and I go, Whitney, I just realized we have this

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Speaker 1: conversation in your immaculate, beautiful marble foy you every single

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Speaker 1: time that we think this is ship and then week

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Speaker 1: and then you always find out it's like one of

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Speaker 1: the best podcasts that your fans love. And then she

400
00:21:59,640 --> 00:22:02,199
Speaker 1: sends she sends her podcast. I think to her cousin

401
00:22:02,400 --> 00:22:05,320
Speaker 1: like her niece to listen to, to like test them,

402
00:22:05,359 --> 00:22:07,239
Speaker 1: and her niece wrote back, like she sent it to me.

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Speaker 1: She's like, I think it's good to go, because her

404
00:22:08,640 --> 00:22:11,320
Speaker 1: niece was like, this is the best podcast. So you

405
00:22:11,400 --> 00:22:15,200
Speaker 1: have great chemistry. I think, yeah, we we really do.

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Speaker 1: We're both really chatty ladies. It's amazing that anyone gets

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00:22:19,320 --> 00:22:23,760
Speaker 1: a word in. But um, she she I'm I'm a

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00:22:23,760 --> 00:22:25,760
Speaker 1: little gay for her. I gotta be honest. She is

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Speaker 1: so beautiful, And I said at the beginning of the podcast,

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Speaker 1: I thought I was like, I was having fantasies of

411
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Speaker 1: making out with you today. It's really bizarre, and I

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Speaker 1: say that it's totally someone who is in a happy relationship.

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Speaker 1: I just think she's so beautiful and I'm so I

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Speaker 1: feel so loved by her. It's really weird, Like I

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Speaker 1: feel like I don't know why I want to make

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Speaker 1: out with someone who I feel maternal towards or that

417
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Speaker 1: she feels maternal towards me, but then she hooked me

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Speaker 1: up with all that Taylor Swift stuff. Anyway, it's interesting.

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Speaker 1: Sparks fly, sparks fly. Okay, yeah, so what's the song about.

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Speaker 1: Let's go through the let's let's listen to the lyrics,

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00:22:57,280 --> 00:23:02,040
Speaker 1: or let's hear let's talk about the lyrics. Yeah, when

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Speaker 1: you just started off, I'll be able to pick up

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00:23:03,640 --> 00:23:06,239
Speaker 1: and just how it opens, the way you move is

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Speaker 1: like a full on rainstorm and was like full on

425
00:23:11,320 --> 00:23:16,320
Speaker 1: rainstorm and not a house of cards. I think it's

426
00:23:16,359 --> 00:23:19,600
Speaker 1: the it's that's off. But you're the kind of reckless

427
00:23:19,640 --> 00:23:22,080
Speaker 1: that should send me running. But you're the kind of

428
00:23:22,080 --> 00:23:25,560
Speaker 1: reckless that could send me running. But I kind of

429
00:23:25,560 --> 00:23:27,680
Speaker 1: know that I won't go far. I kind of no,

430
00:23:27,800 --> 00:23:32,000
Speaker 1: I won't go far. No, no, no, it's too much

431
00:23:32,560 --> 00:23:37,960
Speaker 1: because honestly, he's been asked about this before, and this

432
00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:39,680
Speaker 1: is going to be a conversation I have with him

433
00:23:39,720 --> 00:23:42,440
Speaker 1: offline that he feels safe that I won't talk about it,

434
00:23:43,160 --> 00:23:46,320
Speaker 1: even thoughts will, I'll fashion I gets so he won't

435
00:23:46,320 --> 00:23:54,240
Speaker 1: be applied chorus. Okay, uh, drop everything now, meet me

436
00:23:54,280 --> 00:23:57,600
Speaker 1: in the pouring rain. Everything now, meet me in the

437
00:23:57,720 --> 00:24:01,919
Speaker 1: pouring rain, Kiss me on the sidewalk, Take away the

438
00:24:01,960 --> 00:24:08,280
Speaker 1: pain because I've seen sparks fly whenever you walk by.

439
00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:12,440
Speaker 1: Hit me with those greens, baby and the lads, So Brad,

440
00:24:13,480 --> 00:24:18,560
Speaker 1: it'll sounk you win. You're not around because I see

441
00:24:18,800 --> 00:24:24,359
Speaker 1: sparks fly whenever you use smile? Is that right? Yes?

442
00:24:24,840 --> 00:24:27,680
Speaker 1: Does he have green eyes? He does green? And you're

443
00:24:27,680 --> 00:24:31,320
Speaker 1: gonna write a song about a honky tonk your friends

444
00:24:31,359 --> 00:24:34,480
Speaker 1: with the guy named Andrew from high school or college

445
00:24:34,480 --> 00:24:38,119
Speaker 1: and don't remember which. He's gonna do a podcast with

446
00:24:38,240 --> 00:24:42,359
Speaker 1: Nicky Glazer and she's gonna sing the song off key

447
00:24:44,359 --> 00:24:49,600
Speaker 1: a honky donk. We're going down down to the honky Okay.

448
00:24:49,680 --> 00:24:51,719
Speaker 1: So Nicky Glazer Day in St. Louis is coming up

449
00:24:51,880 --> 00:24:56,720
Speaker 1: this next Thursday. There's a Cardinals game. The Mayor's assistant

450
00:24:56,840 --> 00:24:59,120
Speaker 1: mayor can't make it, but the mayor's assistant is gonna

451
00:24:59,160 --> 00:25:02,400
Speaker 1: grant me a star are somewhere and I'm gonna get

452
00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:04,600
Speaker 1: a fucking food item named after me. I'm gonna be

453
00:25:04,640 --> 00:25:06,960
Speaker 1: the I'm gonna get the key to Ballpark Village, which

454
00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:09,639
Speaker 1: is like this whole area near the stadium that is

455
00:25:10,040 --> 00:25:13,160
Speaker 1: where people fans, Cardinals fans go. I'm gonna get get

456
00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:14,560
Speaker 1: the key to it. I don't know what I'm gonna

457
00:25:14,560 --> 00:25:16,639
Speaker 1: do with that key. I just want to go in

458
00:25:16,760 --> 00:25:19,040
Speaker 1: janitor's closets and stuff. I'm like, I'm like a janitor

459
00:25:19,080 --> 00:25:22,040
Speaker 1: for the day, Like I got access to anything. What

460
00:25:23,320 --> 00:25:24,800
Speaker 1: is it? But like what does it get you into?

461
00:25:24,920 --> 00:25:27,040
Speaker 1: Like what is it? I don't know, like the different

462
00:25:27,040 --> 00:25:32,920
Speaker 1: garages and like I just feel like, you know, it's

463
00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:35,159
Speaker 1: just the Ballpark Village, key to the ball not to

464
00:25:35,240 --> 00:25:40,600
Speaker 1: the city, to Ballpark Village, the best part of the city.

465
00:25:40,680 --> 00:25:43,360
Speaker 1: It's a great little place. You know. Cardinals fans are

466
00:25:43,560 --> 00:25:46,600
Speaker 1: huge like this, you know, we're there some of the

467
00:25:46,600 --> 00:25:50,480
Speaker 1: best fans maybe ever, and so it's just it means

468
00:25:50,480 --> 00:25:52,040
Speaker 1: a lot. And they're doing this whole day called Nicki

469
00:25:52,040 --> 00:25:54,200
Speaker 1: Glazer Day at the stadium. They wanted to do like

470
00:25:54,240 --> 00:25:57,119
Speaker 1: my face on like these little cardboard things so everyone

471
00:25:57,160 --> 00:25:59,679
Speaker 1: in the audience could like have my face on theirs.

472
00:26:00,080 --> 00:26:02,160
Speaker 1: But I just thought that would maybe be too much,

473
00:26:02,200 --> 00:26:04,119
Speaker 1: and I just felt like, I don't some people are

474
00:26:04,119 --> 00:26:06,800
Speaker 1: gonna be like, who's Nicky Glazer? Fuck this bitch, Like

475
00:26:07,119 --> 00:26:09,960
Speaker 1: we love John hand. We don't want I just throwing

476
00:26:09,960 --> 00:26:13,919
Speaker 1: out the first pitch, which the cardboard. I mean, are

477
00:26:13,920 --> 00:26:17,919
Speaker 1: you going to practice? And my day is Nicky Glazer

478
00:26:18,000 --> 00:26:22,119
Speaker 1: Day for Thursday, So I I help. I know Chris

479
00:26:22,160 --> 00:26:24,000
Speaker 1: helped you throw we help. I helped you in the

480
00:26:24,040 --> 00:26:28,920
Speaker 1: green room. You already have gray form. So I and

481
00:26:29,000 --> 00:26:32,080
Speaker 1: I appreciate like I got validated from two men that

482
00:26:32,119 --> 00:26:35,520
Speaker 1: I really trust when it comes to form in sports

483
00:26:36,119 --> 00:26:39,760
Speaker 1: form sports. These guys are both NBA's natural born athletes.

484
00:26:39,760 --> 00:26:43,800
Speaker 1: That's what I call NBA's um. And so I'm throwing

485
00:26:43,800 --> 00:26:45,360
Speaker 1: out the first pitch. I asked them if I could

486
00:26:45,359 --> 00:26:48,000
Speaker 1: sing the national anthem, which given my rendition of spark

487
00:26:48,040 --> 00:26:50,080
Speaker 1: slide today, I don't see why they wouldn't want to

488
00:26:50,080 --> 00:26:53,800
Speaker 1: do that. But they said they just ignored that, and

489
00:26:53,840 --> 00:26:55,639
Speaker 1: they kept saying first pitch. And so I was like,

490
00:26:55,680 --> 00:26:57,800
Speaker 1: can I just go out with the Cardinals girls in

491
00:26:57,840 --> 00:27:00,520
Speaker 1: short shorts and like stand on the ug out and

492
00:27:00,520 --> 00:27:03,600
Speaker 1: like do the little slingshot for like T shirts and like,

493
00:27:04,200 --> 00:27:06,520
Speaker 1: you know, just do a dance with fred Bird. Please

494
00:27:06,560 --> 00:27:08,440
Speaker 1: not the first pitch. I don't want to. You guys

495
00:27:08,480 --> 00:27:11,600
Speaker 1: don't understand. I don't like you do understand you know me.

496
00:27:12,000 --> 00:27:14,680
Speaker 1: I don't like balls. I'm like that girl in Clueless.

497
00:27:14,760 --> 00:27:18,320
Speaker 1: Um My surgeon said I shouldn't have balls flying at

498
00:27:18,359 --> 00:27:24,040
Speaker 1: my face. Well, so I do not. I don't like

499
00:27:24,119 --> 00:27:26,560
Speaker 1: catching balls, I don't like throwing them. I always feel

500
00:27:26,600 --> 00:27:28,879
Speaker 1: like I'm just such like I'm a joke. Like people

501
00:27:28,880 --> 00:27:30,320
Speaker 1: are just like, oh my god, she through that like

502
00:27:30,359 --> 00:27:32,920
Speaker 1: a girl, you know, even though that's like a compliment,

503
00:27:32,960 --> 00:27:34,680
Speaker 1: because I love being a girl that did that to that.

504
00:27:35,600 --> 00:27:40,520
Speaker 1: So the only person I'm really okay being vulnerable about

505
00:27:40,680 --> 00:27:43,320
Speaker 1: my lack of athletic prowess in front of it when

506
00:27:43,320 --> 00:27:46,520
Speaker 1: it comes to someone I really respect athletically is Chris.

507
00:27:46,920 --> 00:27:49,840
Speaker 1: I do not invite Andrew into this because I just

508
00:27:50,240 --> 00:27:52,600
Speaker 1: until the other until I got validation from Chris that

509
00:27:52,640 --> 00:27:54,680
Speaker 1: I had good form, I would not have ever shown

510
00:27:54,720 --> 00:27:57,400
Speaker 1: it to Andrew because I just don't know why. Chris,

511
00:27:57,560 --> 00:27:59,320
Speaker 1: I know, will love me no matter what. I know.

512
00:27:59,400 --> 00:28:01,840
Speaker 1: Andrew wilts too, But I just feel like Andrew will

513
00:28:01,920 --> 00:28:04,520
Speaker 1: laugh at me, whereas Chris won't laugh at me. He'll

514
00:28:04,560 --> 00:28:07,480
Speaker 1: just like help me. But I feel like Andrew will

515
00:28:07,520 --> 00:28:10,440
Speaker 1: be helping me through giggles of how bad I am.

516
00:28:12,080 --> 00:28:14,400
Speaker 1: I think I proved myself. I think I proved myself

517
00:28:14,400 --> 00:28:16,600
Speaker 1: that I didn't giggle in your face, but I went in.

518
00:28:16,920 --> 00:28:21,800
Speaker 1: I was good. So the other night Chris came over

519
00:28:22,040 --> 00:28:23,439
Speaker 1: and he had he has a little ball that he

520
00:28:23,520 --> 00:28:26,480
Speaker 1: keeps here that he rolls out on his shoulder and

521
00:28:26,480 --> 00:28:29,879
Speaker 1: stuff roll out, and he and I started throwing it,

522
00:28:30,000 --> 00:28:32,679
Speaker 1: and he just taught me. He just was like, just

523
00:28:32,720 --> 00:28:34,600
Speaker 1: throw it. He was like, okay, well that was straight.

524
00:28:34,720 --> 00:28:38,880
Speaker 1: But my question, yes, did he stand behind you and

525
00:28:38,960 --> 00:28:43,120
Speaker 1: like put his hands on your hands? And oh my god,

526
00:28:43,240 --> 00:28:46,080
Speaker 1: the movie fever pitch. It would have been so hot. No,

527
00:28:46,320 --> 00:28:48,240
Speaker 1: he didn't do that. Andrew did though, and I go,

528
00:28:48,320 --> 00:28:50,760
Speaker 1: why are we doing? No? Uh no, no one did

529
00:28:50,800 --> 00:28:54,000
Speaker 1: that for me. They just Chris taught me a thing

530
00:28:54,000 --> 00:28:56,520
Speaker 1: where I stepped back with my left foot, I rotate

531
00:28:56,600 --> 00:29:00,280
Speaker 1: my right, my right foot to out, I raised up

532
00:29:00,320 --> 00:29:02,400
Speaker 1: my left foot. It's like, you know, just to do

533
00:29:02,440 --> 00:29:04,840
Speaker 1: a little funny thing beforehand that looks like I'm like,

534
00:29:05,000 --> 00:29:07,240
Speaker 1: you know, just a little performative thing, and then wind

535
00:29:07,320 --> 00:29:11,480
Speaker 1: up and throw and then I should spit on the ball.

536
00:29:12,400 --> 00:29:17,640
Speaker 1: Yeah that's what I I just don't want to oh yeah,

537
00:29:17,640 --> 00:29:19,760
Speaker 1: I want to do like a cartwheel or like a

538
00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:22,200
Speaker 1: back back bend. Or like I don't know, I saw

539
00:29:22,240 --> 00:29:24,240
Speaker 1: someone Vials too. It's like why would I try to

540
00:29:24,240 --> 00:29:27,520
Speaker 1: do anything someone Viles? Does you know what you should do? Honestly,

541
00:29:28,280 --> 00:29:31,040
Speaker 1: I think when you get up there face towards second

542
00:29:31,080 --> 00:29:34,360
Speaker 1: base and then go oh fuck, like just a quick

543
00:29:34,480 --> 00:29:36,960
Speaker 1: like you're facing the wrong way and you catch it,

544
00:29:36,960 --> 00:29:40,000
Speaker 1: it's almost too obvious that so wrong it would be

545
00:29:40,000 --> 00:29:43,640
Speaker 1: funny or to do something that's like like a very

546
00:29:43,680 --> 00:29:46,720
Speaker 1: like an earnestly like something I would get wrong that

547
00:29:46,760 --> 00:29:48,200
Speaker 1: I would never get wrong. You know what I'm saying.

548
00:29:48,280 --> 00:29:50,560
Speaker 1: I know you're saying it's like so exaggerated that's funny.

549
00:29:50,640 --> 00:29:52,920
Speaker 1: But that's my point. Yeah, Like is that it's just

550
00:29:53,040 --> 00:29:56,080
Speaker 1: so like like if it was like a little bit

551
00:29:56,080 --> 00:29:58,880
Speaker 1: too long that you were just facing what if I

552
00:29:58,920 --> 00:30:00,960
Speaker 1: was like licking my fingers and you know, doing the

553
00:30:01,000 --> 00:30:02,800
Speaker 1: thing under my eye? Like is there any kind of

554
00:30:02,840 --> 00:30:06,440
Speaker 1: like funny anyway? Oh? You could pretend to have like

555
00:30:06,840 --> 00:30:10,400
Speaker 1: vassiline all over, like like a lot of pictures will

556
00:30:10,480 --> 00:30:16,040
Speaker 1: hide like vasoline and like they're like going sweat. No,

557
00:30:16,080 --> 00:30:18,080
Speaker 1: I don't want to be filthy because St. Louis already

558
00:30:18,080 --> 00:30:20,400
Speaker 1: is kind of like are we letting this fucking horror

559
00:30:20,440 --> 00:30:26,720
Speaker 1: on Okay, you know Christian baseball field. So so then

560
00:30:26,760 --> 00:30:30,000
Speaker 1: Andrew and I threw around Matt pond sock. Last in

561
00:30:30,200 --> 00:30:34,600
Speaker 1: um Dallas, We're thrown around COVID and we and Andrew

562
00:30:34,600 --> 00:30:37,000
Speaker 1: said it was good. He was impressed by me. It

563
00:30:37,040 --> 00:30:38,880
Speaker 1: was a sock. I mean, what what are we gonna do?

564
00:30:38,960 --> 00:30:40,520
Speaker 1: And he gave me some tips that were really good.

565
00:30:40,840 --> 00:30:44,440
Speaker 1: Was like, losing is lighter than a ball, Yeah, but

566
00:30:44,720 --> 00:30:47,160
Speaker 1: it was easier to like really try to throw it

567
00:30:47,200 --> 00:30:49,920
Speaker 1: as hard as possible, whereas if I was indoors trying

568
00:30:49,920 --> 00:30:51,320
Speaker 1: to I just there's a part of me that's so

569
00:30:51,360 --> 00:30:54,400
Speaker 1: scared of breaking things that I just never will throw

570
00:30:54,440 --> 00:30:55,880
Speaker 1: it as hard as I can lest it's something that

571
00:30:55,920 --> 00:30:58,680
Speaker 1: I know won't hurt anyone. Um. And he taught me

572
00:30:58,720 --> 00:31:00,360
Speaker 1: to like loosen up my arm because I was kind

573
00:31:00,360 --> 00:31:03,000
Speaker 1: of like all bunched up and like. And then yesterday

574
00:31:03,080 --> 00:31:07,080
Speaker 1: Chris picked me up and brought me. We got we

575
00:31:07,120 --> 00:31:10,560
Speaker 1: went and played catch in forest Park and we played

576
00:31:10,600 --> 00:31:15,000
Speaker 1: catch for like an hour and I'm so good. I

577
00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:18,360
Speaker 1: hate to brag, but I'm really good. And we were

578
00:31:18,360 --> 00:31:20,640
Speaker 1: doing it from sixty and a half feet away, which

579
00:31:20,680 --> 00:31:22,600
Speaker 1: is like is not going to be the distance that

580
00:31:22,600 --> 00:31:24,360
Speaker 1: I'm gonna have to do it because that's the distance

581
00:31:24,440 --> 00:31:28,920
Speaker 1: between the UM you know, the pictures, mound and home plate.

582
00:31:29,400 --> 00:31:31,200
Speaker 1: But they're going to come in for me a little

583
00:31:31,200 --> 00:31:33,320
Speaker 1: bit further. And I think Chris was like, I think

584
00:31:33,360 --> 00:31:35,400
Speaker 1: you tell him to stay. I think you do six.

585
00:31:35,920 --> 00:31:38,680
Speaker 1: I think, yeah, I'm gonna. I think it'd be funny

586
00:31:38,720 --> 00:31:44,040
Speaker 1: if I just go no, go back. And then yeah,

587
00:31:44,360 --> 00:31:48,560
Speaker 1: did you see the video of UM baseball that hit

588
00:31:48,680 --> 00:31:52,480
Speaker 1: the I think the pictures, but yeah, did you see

589
00:31:52,480 --> 00:31:56,720
Speaker 1: that video? So hot? It like he was like j Lo,

590
00:31:57,000 --> 00:32:00,680
Speaker 1: it was like so hot. It was like a juicy ass.

591
00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:04,200
Speaker 1: That ball was crying and he kind of like yeah, yeah,

592
00:32:04,200 --> 00:32:09,000
Speaker 1: the ball slung half Yeah, Noah has it right here. Look.

593
00:32:09,080 --> 00:32:10,840
Speaker 1: I like how he gives it a little boom and

594
00:32:10,880 --> 00:32:14,480
Speaker 1: he was able to get that hand out in front.

595
00:32:15,320 --> 00:32:19,560
Speaker 1: I want to do that bang picture. That is like

596
00:32:19,560 --> 00:32:23,200
Speaker 1: a luscious ass. That's an insane ass. There's girls that

597
00:32:23,200 --> 00:32:25,400
Speaker 1: would go to baseball games at two Lane just to

598
00:32:25,440 --> 00:32:28,480
Speaker 1: see that. Ask those pants really a stuate the ass.

599
00:32:28,880 --> 00:32:35,280
Speaker 1: Women don't go to they're wrong going for it. It's

600
00:32:35,320 --> 00:32:38,000
Speaker 1: just an added perk. No, they go because they think

601
00:32:38,040 --> 00:32:39,840
Speaker 1: they might have a chance of fucking those guys. But

602
00:32:39,840 --> 00:32:42,719
Speaker 1: they don't go just to ogle. I'm telling you they were.

603
00:32:43,320 --> 00:32:46,360
Speaker 1: I had friends, there were a lot of baseball groupies

604
00:32:46,480 --> 00:32:48,520
Speaker 1: that love the tight pants with the app But they

605
00:32:48,560 --> 00:32:50,440
Speaker 1: also think they have a chance of sucking those guys.

606
00:32:50,440 --> 00:32:54,920
Speaker 1: That's why they if they well that's mainly that's two

607
00:32:54,960 --> 00:32:58,040
Speaker 1: different things, because if the if the chance to fuck

608
00:32:58,120 --> 00:33:01,080
Speaker 1: them was out of the equation, then it wouldn't happen,

609
00:33:01,520 --> 00:33:03,880
Speaker 1: like if they were just aggling, Like if they could

610
00:33:03,920 --> 00:33:05,320
Speaker 1: go watch it on a screen where it was just

611
00:33:05,320 --> 00:33:07,960
Speaker 1: close ups of their asses, they probably wouldn't watch it

612
00:33:08,000 --> 00:33:10,560
Speaker 1: from home. Do you know what I'm saying. I get

613
00:33:10,560 --> 00:33:12,320
Speaker 1: what you're saying, but I don't. I don't think they

614
00:33:12,360 --> 00:33:16,479
Speaker 1: stand alone. I think i've I've oggled before. I get it,

615
00:33:16,480 --> 00:33:19,640
Speaker 1: but I would not. You just would look up if

616
00:33:19,640 --> 00:33:23,640
Speaker 1: you google Google. Uh, halle Berry looking at Kobe Bryant

617
00:33:23,640 --> 00:33:26,400
Speaker 1: at the Yeah, but that's because she has a chance

618
00:33:26,440 --> 00:33:35,320
Speaker 1: to Kobe Bryant for sure, But she did so anyway,

619
00:33:35,360 --> 00:33:39,200
Speaker 1: I will say how I feel. I'm really good. We

620
00:33:39,240 --> 00:33:42,160
Speaker 1: threw for an hour, and I will say that I

621
00:33:42,200 --> 00:33:45,280
Speaker 1: got I threw to him straight and it wasn't always

622
00:33:45,280 --> 00:33:48,160
Speaker 1: sixty ft away. It was usually like more like forty.

623
00:33:48,200 --> 00:33:51,240
Speaker 1: But I will say that I got I was. I

624
00:33:51,280 --> 00:33:57,240
Speaker 1: threw straight of the time, maybe five and I got

625
00:33:57,280 --> 00:34:02,360
Speaker 1: it within inches of his mit sev the time, like

626
00:34:02,480 --> 00:34:05,400
Speaker 1: it was, it was undeniably. I'm good and like I

627
00:34:05,440 --> 00:34:08,440
Speaker 1: have good Like I my arm is is weaker than

628
00:34:08,480 --> 00:34:10,160
Speaker 1: my aim, but my aim is good. That's all I

629
00:34:10,200 --> 00:34:13,200
Speaker 1: want to do is really throw it straight. So what

630
00:34:13,280 --> 00:34:15,480
Speaker 1: I know now is that despite so I get to

631
00:34:15,520 --> 00:34:17,800
Speaker 1: do it one time, you know, I don't get to

632
00:34:17,840 --> 00:34:19,480
Speaker 1: like I can warm up a little bit, but it's

633
00:34:19,520 --> 00:34:21,200
Speaker 1: gonna be scared. Like if I if I get to

634
00:34:21,239 --> 00:34:24,279
Speaker 1: throw five pitches, then people would be like, wow, she's good.

635
00:34:24,480 --> 00:34:27,040
Speaker 1: If I pick up one time and do the one

636
00:34:27,080 --> 00:34:30,360
Speaker 1: bad one, because one out of every you know, I

637
00:34:30,360 --> 00:34:32,240
Speaker 1: would say ten percent of the time, it's a fucking

638
00:34:32,280 --> 00:34:33,960
Speaker 1: bad one. You know, I just like throw it into

639
00:34:34,000 --> 00:34:36,759
Speaker 1: the ground or whatever. So but what I know is

640
00:34:36,800 --> 00:34:41,640
Speaker 1: that my boyfriend, who I really care about him, you know,

641
00:34:41,680 --> 00:34:43,839
Speaker 1: being proud of his lady, he can be proud of

642
00:34:43,840 --> 00:34:46,600
Speaker 1: me already and know what I'm He knows what I'm

643
00:34:46,640 --> 00:34:49,040
Speaker 1: capable of. I don't I'm capable of. And it doesn't

644
00:34:49,040 --> 00:34:55,080
Speaker 1: matter if you throw too far. It will look cooler

645
00:34:55,239 --> 00:34:58,840
Speaker 1: than coming up short. So if I were you, I

646
00:34:58,880 --> 00:35:02,600
Speaker 1: would aim high because no one's expecting a girl to

647
00:35:02,760 --> 00:35:04,799
Speaker 1: be able to throw it like seventy ft. And if

648
00:35:04,840 --> 00:35:08,000
Speaker 1: you were like, sorry, I'm too fucking strong, no one's

649
00:35:08,040 --> 00:35:09,719
Speaker 1: going to laugh at that. Because I just want to

650
00:35:09,719 --> 00:35:13,080
Speaker 1: throw it dead straight. I'm okay if it goes a

651
00:35:13,080 --> 00:35:15,799
Speaker 1: little short, but yes, I will aim to throw it

652
00:35:16,160 --> 00:35:19,040
Speaker 1: because I could. If I throw it straight on, I

653
00:35:19,120 --> 00:35:20,880
Speaker 1: won't go sixty ft, but if I do it a

654
00:35:20,880 --> 00:35:23,920
Speaker 1: little pop up style, it'll go the sixty and a half.

655
00:35:24,239 --> 00:35:26,319
Speaker 1: So I'm going to go for throwing it a little

656
00:35:26,360 --> 00:35:29,799
Speaker 1: bit higher. Yes, even though it looks a little bit

657
00:35:29,800 --> 00:35:33,600
Speaker 1: more girly, but I I really am aiming for like, wow,

658
00:35:33,640 --> 00:35:36,040
Speaker 1: that was right on his mit. Because my aim isn't

659
00:35:36,200 --> 00:35:38,600
Speaker 1: really good, I will think, I mean, I don't know

660
00:35:38,640 --> 00:35:41,279
Speaker 1: what to compare it to. Who knows. Maybe everyone's this good,

661
00:35:41,600 --> 00:35:44,560
Speaker 1: but um, I felt, you know me, I only do

662
00:35:44,680 --> 00:35:46,600
Speaker 1: things that I feel like, oh, I'm actually like better

663
00:35:46,600 --> 00:35:49,680
Speaker 1: than this than most people. And I felt my aim

664
00:35:49,760 --> 00:35:51,840
Speaker 1: because my dad used to practice with me with frisbee.

665
00:35:51,840 --> 00:35:53,120
Speaker 1: He said, if you hit me on the chest and

666
00:35:53,160 --> 00:35:55,680
Speaker 1: he'd be sixty feet away. I'll give you fifty dollars,

667
00:35:55,680 --> 00:35:57,440
Speaker 1: and so we would always he would just stand there

668
00:35:57,480 --> 00:36:00,359
Speaker 1: with his chest and I think I want it in time,

669
00:36:00,400 --> 00:36:02,359
Speaker 1: but we were I was, you know, I know aim

670
00:36:02,360 --> 00:36:11,000
Speaker 1: in that sense. Okay, let's get to the news. It's Wednesday, folks.

671
00:36:11,000 --> 00:36:13,520
Speaker 1: You know what that means. It is Wednesday. I hope

672
00:36:13,520 --> 00:36:15,720
Speaker 1: you're having a good time out there. It's a hump

673
00:36:16,120 --> 00:36:18,879
Speaker 1: the day of the week. It's the middle of the week,

674
00:36:19,000 --> 00:36:21,120
Speaker 1: it's the top of the week. It's coming on back down,

675
00:36:21,200 --> 00:36:22,840
Speaker 1: but it will come back up there in the weekend.

676
00:36:23,600 --> 00:36:26,080
Speaker 1: Who knows, maybe not, but I hope you're having all

677
00:36:26,080 --> 00:36:27,640
Speaker 1: the swells out there. And I don't think no one's

678
00:36:27,640 --> 00:36:30,200
Speaker 1: going to take it away. Here we go take it there.

679
00:36:30,800 --> 00:36:34,600
Speaker 1: Just a friendly reminder to go to Nicki glazer dot

680
00:36:34,600 --> 00:36:37,960
Speaker 1: com slash tour for Nikki's tour dates, and it's also

681
00:36:38,320 --> 00:36:40,799
Speaker 1: on the fully Loaded Comedy Festival. You've got a couple

682
00:36:40,800 --> 00:36:43,719
Speaker 1: of dates on those, yes, and I have also extended,

683
00:36:43,840 --> 00:36:46,600
Speaker 1: if not on the fully Loaded Burt tour, but on

684
00:36:46,640 --> 00:36:50,000
Speaker 1: my tour. If you go alone and write me going

685
00:36:50,040 --> 00:36:52,839
Speaker 1: alone in all caps, but in only that message, don't

686
00:36:52,840 --> 00:36:54,799
Speaker 1: write something after it, because I only see the one

687
00:36:55,000 --> 00:36:57,480
Speaker 1: last message you said. If you started with going alone

688
00:36:57,480 --> 00:36:59,960
Speaker 1: in all caps and you tell me you're going alone

689
00:37:00,000 --> 00:37:02,000
Speaker 1: to a show, I will give you free meet and

690
00:37:02,000 --> 00:37:05,080
Speaker 1: greet on me for being brave enough to go alone,

691
00:37:05,239 --> 00:37:06,680
Speaker 1: and I will bump you up to a v I

692
00:37:06,719 --> 00:37:09,920
Speaker 1: P meet and greet. So just DM meet going alone

693
00:37:09,960 --> 00:37:11,480
Speaker 1: all caps if you want to go alone to any

694
00:37:11,480 --> 00:37:13,799
Speaker 1: of the shows that aren't on the Burt tour um

695
00:37:13,840 --> 00:37:15,759
Speaker 1: and that is my gift to you for being brave

696
00:37:15,880 --> 00:37:18,640
Speaker 1: enough to go alone. Going alone all caps, give me

697
00:37:18,680 --> 00:37:21,840
Speaker 1: your full name and what show you're going to and boom,

698
00:37:21,880 --> 00:37:25,239
Speaker 1: they'll be at the box office. No other no other requirements.

699
00:37:25,880 --> 00:37:28,239
Speaker 1: All right, so the first story I have to say,

700
00:37:28,280 --> 00:37:34,040
Speaker 1: thanks to bestie. She goes by wit for brains on Instagram. Alright.

701
00:37:34,239 --> 00:37:40,800
Speaker 1: Several meaningful kindergarteners consumed a pre mix tequila drink marked

702
00:37:40,880 --> 00:37:44,400
Speaker 1: as adult lemonade at snack time in their Michigan school.

703
00:37:45,600 --> 00:37:53,879
Speaker 1: Good for them, so poison could fall, No student needed

704
00:37:53,920 --> 00:38:00,120
Speaker 1: medical attention. They were doing a line. Yeah, well it

705
00:38:00,160 --> 00:38:02,439
Speaker 1: had ten percent alcohol, which is come of a lot.

706
00:38:02,880 --> 00:38:08,120
Speaker 1: That's a lot. And why was it out there like

707
00:38:08,239 --> 00:38:10,400
Speaker 1: just like labeled like so easily. I bet one of

708
00:38:10,440 --> 00:38:13,759
Speaker 1: them brought it from home. Yeah, so a student brought

709
00:38:13,760 --> 00:38:18,239
Speaker 1: it from home. Um. The spokesperson from the school said

710
00:38:18,239 --> 00:38:21,120
Speaker 1: it's unfortunate that these types of adult beverages can easily

711
00:38:21,280 --> 00:38:25,200
Speaker 1: be mistaken for child friendly drinks. Yes, especially when it

712
00:38:25,200 --> 00:38:27,360
Speaker 1: says adult on it and you're a little kid and

713
00:38:27,400 --> 00:38:29,360
Speaker 1: you want to feel adult, or you don't even know

714
00:38:29,400 --> 00:38:31,799
Speaker 1: what the word adult means and it says lemonade. And

715
00:38:32,400 --> 00:38:35,719
Speaker 1: you know, things are labeled in such cute ways. You

716
00:38:35,760 --> 00:38:39,520
Speaker 1: know that. Remember that the drink on Summer House that

717
00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:42,160
Speaker 1: that guy sells lover Boy, that is a that's a

718
00:38:42,200 --> 00:38:45,120
Speaker 1: little girl's Like I would be obsessed with that packaging

719
00:38:45,120 --> 00:38:49,560
Speaker 1: and stuff as a little girl. And so you know what, man,

720
00:38:50,400 --> 00:38:53,920
Speaker 1: As someone who doesn't drink anymore, I get jealous of

721
00:38:53,960 --> 00:38:56,400
Speaker 1: anyone who accidentally consumes alcohol and just gets to have

722
00:38:56,440 --> 00:38:59,480
Speaker 1: a little fun buzz. Even kids who have developmental like

723
00:38:59,560 --> 00:39:04,200
Speaker 1: brains are still developing. One little drunk ee episode is

724
00:39:04,200 --> 00:39:05,720
Speaker 1: not gonna It's just going to be a good story

725
00:39:05,760 --> 00:39:08,000
Speaker 1: for the rest of their lives. So good. I never

726
00:39:08,040 --> 00:39:10,080
Speaker 1: had a white claw. Have you ever had a white claw? No,

727
00:39:10,440 --> 00:39:12,840
Speaker 1: you should do that now, I know. I guess I

728
00:39:12,880 --> 00:39:14,839
Speaker 1: could have a white are you done drinking, Like, what's

729
00:39:14,840 --> 00:39:20,120
Speaker 1: your status right now? Are you going back on the really?

730
00:39:20,239 --> 00:39:23,399
Speaker 1: Like I just want to be healthy right now? Yah? Yeah,

731
00:39:23,400 --> 00:39:26,640
Speaker 1: you don't want to do anything that affects your immune system. Yeah,

732
00:39:26,920 --> 00:39:29,120
Speaker 1: so I don't know, I'll probably Yeah, I don't have

733
00:39:29,160 --> 00:39:31,600
Speaker 1: a white claw. You gotta do my claw within this month.

734
00:39:31,600 --> 00:39:34,160
Speaker 1: I'm gonna have one white claw. Hell, yes, dude, And

735
00:39:34,160 --> 00:39:38,279
Speaker 1: I'm gonna drink you with fives truly, or a kombucha,

736
00:39:38,440 --> 00:39:41,200
Speaker 1: even a full blast kombucha would be yummy. I'm just

737
00:39:41,239 --> 00:39:45,719
Speaker 1: like rings like Dad's heroin. He's like, oh, I thought

738
00:39:45,760 --> 00:39:48,960
Speaker 1: it was. It was so jealous, like we thought it

739
00:39:49,000 --> 00:39:56,680
Speaker 1: was the kid's kind you injunct into your asshole. What

740
00:39:56,760 --> 00:40:01,120
Speaker 1: was your science experiments? I just did moniest fucking one ever.

741
00:40:03,040 --> 00:40:05,840
Speaker 1: We do this later. I don't know this is actually

742
00:40:05,840 --> 00:40:08,799
Speaker 1: appropriate with this. I was in chemistry class. I did

743
00:40:08,800 --> 00:40:12,080
Speaker 1: not understand anything about, you know, chemical reactions, and we

744
00:40:12,120 --> 00:40:14,319
Speaker 1: had to do we had to pitch a product that

745
00:40:14,400 --> 00:40:17,600
Speaker 1: was based on the assignment. Was you create a product

746
00:40:17,960 --> 00:40:21,239
Speaker 1: that you're selling almost like shark tank, where there's a

747
00:40:21,520 --> 00:40:25,120
Speaker 1: there's a chemical reaction that happens in the product. All right,

748
00:40:25,440 --> 00:40:27,480
Speaker 1: So the only chemical reaction I knew of the easiest

749
00:40:27,480 --> 00:40:32,080
Speaker 1: one was baking soda vinegar boom volcano. Right, we all

750
00:40:32,120 --> 00:40:33,960
Speaker 1: we all know that this is tenth grade and so

751
00:40:34,040 --> 00:40:37,600
Speaker 1: like this is volcanoes, that chemical action is so like elementary.

752
00:40:37,640 --> 00:40:40,480
Speaker 1: But I was like, I can still use it. It

753
00:40:40,520 --> 00:40:42,360
Speaker 1: passes the test of this thing. So I came up

754
00:40:42,360 --> 00:40:45,719
Speaker 1: with the product. This is honestly so funny. It was.

755
00:40:45,760 --> 00:40:50,960
Speaker 1: I bought a baby doll, the hollow baby doll. I

756
00:40:51,120 --> 00:40:53,960
Speaker 1: put baking soda inside the baby doll. After I took

757
00:40:53,960 --> 00:40:56,719
Speaker 1: off its head, put the head back on, I uh

758
00:40:57,080 --> 00:40:59,640
Speaker 1: made a hole in its mouth. And it was a

759
00:40:59,680 --> 00:41:03,920
Speaker 1: baby doll that taught kids about the dangers of drinking alcohol.

760
00:41:04,160 --> 00:41:06,640
Speaker 1: And then I put vinegar and like with like a

761
00:41:06,680 --> 00:41:09,680
Speaker 1: beer on the bottle. And then I was like, you know,

762
00:41:09,719 --> 00:41:11,560
Speaker 1: this is a baby doll that you give your children

763
00:41:11,600 --> 00:41:13,560
Speaker 1: to teach them like alcohol is bad for you and

764
00:41:13,640 --> 00:41:15,200
Speaker 1: makes you sick. And so I poured I was like,

765
00:41:15,400 --> 00:41:17,760
Speaker 1: baby loves beer, and I poured it into the baby

766
00:41:17,800 --> 00:41:22,080
Speaker 1: starts spewing up everywhere. It was a doll that dare

767
00:41:22,120 --> 00:41:25,040
Speaker 1: teachers could take around to schools to teach kids. And

768
00:41:25,080 --> 00:41:27,640
Speaker 1: I got a you know, a plus plus because of

769
00:41:27,680 --> 00:41:31,040
Speaker 1: creativity more so than the chemical reaction that I had

770
00:41:31,080 --> 00:41:34,080
Speaker 1: to also explain on the white board. I think, you know,

771
00:41:34,360 --> 00:41:37,560
Speaker 1: that's a great invention. I really like that invention. Thank you,

772
00:41:37,840 --> 00:41:40,480
Speaker 1: thank you. I'm really really creative with I had some

773
00:41:40,640 --> 00:41:44,080
Speaker 1: great school projects. What about you. I've told you this.

774
00:41:44,320 --> 00:41:46,680
Speaker 1: I mean I was a little less creative with this one.

775
00:41:46,880 --> 00:41:49,920
Speaker 1: I Uh. I brought in a few different kind of fruits,

776
00:41:50,080 --> 00:41:55,120
Speaker 1: and I had people plug their nose to see if taste,

777
00:41:55,160 --> 00:41:59,720
Speaker 1: if smell effects taste. So the idea was they clamped

778
00:41:59,719 --> 00:42:04,680
Speaker 1: their so they can't smell. And so here's the thing though,

779
00:42:04,760 --> 00:42:08,799
Speaker 1: I forgot the clamp, so I just blindfolded them. Well

780
00:42:08,840 --> 00:42:12,160
Speaker 1: they get plugged their nouse. I guess they could have,

781
00:42:12,280 --> 00:42:15,440
Speaker 1: but they didn't. So I just blindfolded them and they

782
00:42:15,440 --> 00:42:19,040
Speaker 1: were like, yeah, that's an orange, that's an apple, that's

783
00:42:19,040 --> 00:42:22,840
Speaker 1: an orange. Yeah. Uh. They were all fifty for fifty,

784
00:42:23,000 --> 00:42:25,800
Speaker 1: like it was literally, there was no The hypothesis is

785
00:42:25,840 --> 00:42:29,680
Speaker 1: that I'm a fucking moron. And the conclusion was I

786
00:42:29,800 --> 00:42:34,040
Speaker 1: was right by literally like you would think by like

787
00:42:34,320 --> 00:42:37,120
Speaker 1: forty eight like of them going that's an orange, I

788
00:42:37,120 --> 00:42:40,120
Speaker 1: would have stopped, but I think I stuck with it

789
00:42:40,160 --> 00:42:43,279
Speaker 1: too because like I had to be confident about how

790
00:42:43,360 --> 00:42:49,440
Speaker 1: bad you know what I mean, Like, yeah, I was

791
00:42:49,520 --> 00:42:52,239
Speaker 1: like yeah, I was like by thirty, I was just like,

792
00:42:52,480 --> 00:42:55,960
Speaker 1: I know this is wrong. I would see the guy

793
00:42:55,960 --> 00:42:57,600
Speaker 1: in class leaned back in his chair to be kin.

794
00:42:57,719 --> 00:42:59,279
Speaker 1: Then he'd fall over and he'd be like I loved it,

795
00:42:59,280 --> 00:43:00,799
Speaker 1: I want to do it again, and you're like, no,

796
00:43:00,960 --> 00:43:03,080
Speaker 1: you didn't, and you've funked up, and now you're like

797
00:43:03,120 --> 00:43:05,520
Speaker 1: embracing it like it was meant to be. We used

798
00:43:05,560 --> 00:43:09,920
Speaker 1: to make fun of that guy so much, all right,

799
00:43:10,480 --> 00:43:15,799
Speaker 1: Andrew study finds that American men's penises are only the

800
00:43:15,840 --> 00:43:20,800
Speaker 1: fifty ninth biggest in the world, beaten by Haitians, Australians,

801
00:43:20,920 --> 00:43:32,160
Speaker 1: and French whoa out of country country. Here's the sch

802
00:43:32,160 --> 00:43:37,759
Speaker 1: long list. Oh wow, so equator six point nine three

803
00:43:37,800 --> 00:43:40,880
Speaker 1: inches average. Wait we're not seeing. I'm not seeing the

804
00:43:40,880 --> 00:43:45,359
Speaker 1: whole thing thing is zoomed in. Yes, So Ecuador comes

805
00:43:45,360 --> 00:43:49,680
Speaker 1: in at number one with six point nine three. It

806
00:43:49,760 --> 00:43:58,080
Speaker 1: goes Ecuador, Cameroon, Bolivia, su Dan, Haiti, France. Although all these,

807
00:43:58,120 --> 00:44:02,720
Speaker 1: all these countries, I will say, have um their foreskin still,

808
00:44:03,520 --> 00:44:08,680
Speaker 1: which I bet ads point three I wrecked, I know,

809
00:44:08,800 --> 00:44:12,840
Speaker 1: but they so their four skin gets pulled back. Okay, yeah, okay,

810
00:44:12,960 --> 00:44:16,400
Speaker 1: So I mean I feel like in any country that

811
00:44:16,560 --> 00:44:18,960
Speaker 1: might be a little smaller where everyone is pretty much similar,

812
00:44:19,000 --> 00:44:21,719
Speaker 1: so you're gonna get similar sized dicks. America, you have

813
00:44:21,800 --> 00:44:25,560
Speaker 1: so much diversity, so you could have Well do you

814
00:44:25,600 --> 00:44:27,440
Speaker 1: think about if we didn't have so much diversity it

815
00:44:27,440 --> 00:44:31,719
Speaker 1: was just all the white man, we would be a

816
00:44:31,800 --> 00:44:37,200
Speaker 1: lot lower. Average length numbers six thousand the average length

817
00:44:37,239 --> 00:44:40,680
Speaker 1: of an American man's penis countries. Yeah, according to the

818
00:44:40,840 --> 00:44:43,680
Speaker 1: study that the Sun posted about, it has to be

819
00:44:44,640 --> 00:44:48,839
Speaker 1: oh or something five point three five. That can't be right.

820
00:44:50,280 --> 00:44:55,560
Speaker 1: That's the average in US. Yes, so that makes sense.

821
00:44:56,320 --> 00:44:59,680
Speaker 1: That's a that's a decent size. That's that's a decent size.

822
00:44:59,680 --> 00:45:02,839
Speaker 1: That's you don't know penis length. You always like, you

823
00:45:02,840 --> 00:45:05,360
Speaker 1: guys draw it at this comedy cellar, and you know,

824
00:45:05,800 --> 00:45:07,640
Speaker 1: I know what it is. I'm saying, I know you

825
00:45:07,680 --> 00:45:11,120
Speaker 1: think that that's small. No, no, but I'm saying, I'm

826
00:45:11,120 --> 00:45:13,920
Speaker 1: saying what you think five point three? I get a

827
00:45:14,000 --> 00:45:17,720
Speaker 1: ruler because I know what six inches is? Six inches

828
00:45:17,760 --> 00:45:21,160
Speaker 1: is this whenever you draw dicks on the on the Yeah,

829
00:45:21,160 --> 00:45:23,440
Speaker 1: we were drawing big dicks though. Andrew we knew that.

830
00:45:24,120 --> 00:45:29,040
Speaker 1: I know dick a whole special about how my boyfriend's

831
00:45:29,040 --> 00:45:31,279
Speaker 1: penis was average and how he should be proud of it.

832
00:45:31,320 --> 00:45:37,520
Speaker 1: I know what an average penis is. Okay, but but okay,

833
00:45:37,600 --> 00:45:40,200
Speaker 1: how many countries do you think there are? Don't look, guys,

834
00:45:40,200 --> 00:45:42,200
Speaker 1: don't look because I just looked it up because I

835
00:45:42,239 --> 00:45:45,240
Speaker 1: kind of didn't know in the world, no, in the universe,

836
00:45:47,239 --> 00:45:49,279
Speaker 1: in our country, how many countries are? Right? I know?

837
00:45:49,400 --> 00:45:52,959
Speaker 1: I think, oh yeah, I'm gonna go with I'd say

838
00:45:53,000 --> 00:46:03,279
Speaker 1: there's a million, Okay, Um, I think like in the

839
00:46:03,360 --> 00:46:06,279
Speaker 1: three hundreds. It's so funny. I would have guessed like

840
00:46:06,320 --> 00:46:14,200
Speaker 1: two forty, I think. Okay, but that we don't know that.

841
00:46:17,360 --> 00:46:18,880
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, that's a good point. Yeah, who is the

842
00:46:18,920 --> 00:46:21,480
Speaker 1: smallest dicks? No? Is there anyone or who's the smallest

843
00:46:21,520 --> 00:46:24,280
Speaker 1: on the list? Yes, that was included, but I didn't

844
00:46:24,280 --> 00:46:27,200
Speaker 1: wait to disparage anyone, so I didn't come on. What

845
00:46:27,680 --> 00:46:29,879
Speaker 1: kind of small ticks are not a bad thing? I

846
00:46:29,920 --> 00:46:35,160
Speaker 1: love it, really did together. I believe it was Cambodia

847
00:46:35,280 --> 00:46:39,040
Speaker 1: that came in last. Cambodia. Okay, Oh yeah, I don't

848
00:46:39,080 --> 00:46:41,480
Speaker 1: want to do the whole like Asians have small penises,

849
00:46:41,520 --> 00:46:47,400
Speaker 1: they and tired, and also I don't think true, but

850
00:46:47,440 --> 00:46:51,120
Speaker 1: if it is, who gives a fuck? My whole special

851
00:46:51,160 --> 00:46:52,839
Speaker 1: is turning into I just want to do a whole

852
00:46:52,840 --> 00:46:55,560
Speaker 1: special about guys with small penises and now they should

853
00:46:55,560 --> 00:46:58,560
Speaker 1: be proud. There was a lot. I posted something on

854
00:46:58,600 --> 00:47:04,520
Speaker 1: my Instagram yesterday from the Lesser the account that said, uh,

855
00:47:04,719 --> 00:47:06,400
Speaker 1: let me see if it's still up there one second.

856
00:47:07,600 --> 00:47:09,879
Speaker 1: They should make they should make a thing that goes

857
00:47:09,920 --> 00:47:15,080
Speaker 1: around your penis that like maybe like I don't know,

858
00:47:15,080 --> 00:47:17,719
Speaker 1: like a like a peg for your penis, but you

859
00:47:17,760 --> 00:47:23,360
Speaker 1: don't they have that really? Yeah, like like an extension

860
00:47:23,400 --> 00:47:26,120
Speaker 1: for the penis that men can wear. Yeah they Yeah,

861
00:47:26,160 --> 00:47:30,000
Speaker 1: they've read everything. Um, they have everything. You feel the

862
00:47:30,760 --> 00:47:34,680
Speaker 1: I wonder if you could feel blessa company? Ballessa co

863
00:47:35,040 --> 00:47:37,600
Speaker 1: on Instagram. I posted this on my story. I've never

864
00:47:37,640 --> 00:47:39,759
Speaker 1: gotten so many reactions to something I put on my

865
00:47:39,800 --> 00:47:43,279
Speaker 1: story than this. It was a tweet from just k

866
00:47:43,640 --> 00:47:47,520
Speaker 1: y ten eighteen says when men learned the vibrator as

867
00:47:47,560 --> 00:47:50,239
Speaker 1: their teammates and not the competition, society will heal. And

868
00:47:50,239 --> 00:47:53,680
Speaker 1: I had so many guys writing to me being like yes, girl,

869
00:47:53,880 --> 00:47:57,200
Speaker 1: being like hey, I allow that? Will you dat me?

870
00:47:57,640 --> 00:48:00,440
Speaker 1: And then I had so many girls writing to me,

871
00:48:00,520 --> 00:48:04,520
Speaker 1: including one who I'm not going to reveal who it was,

872
00:48:05,400 --> 00:48:09,480
Speaker 1: but it's someone um who I think I know personally.

873
00:48:10,640 --> 00:48:12,360
Speaker 1: It's one of those internet friendships that you don't know

874
00:48:12,400 --> 00:48:16,400
Speaker 1: if you've met personally. But um, she said, my boyfriend

875
00:48:16,440 --> 00:48:19,120
Speaker 1: doesn't believe she goes a percent. My boyfriend doesn't believe me.

876
00:48:19,120 --> 00:48:21,560
Speaker 1: I said, not, okay, she goes. Alpha males are insecure.

877
00:48:21,680 --> 00:48:24,040
Speaker 1: L O L. I said, I won't have sex without them,

878
00:48:24,160 --> 00:48:26,520
Speaker 1: meaning alpha males now meaning vibrators. She said, I bring

879
00:48:26,520 --> 00:48:29,040
Speaker 1: it out always. The weird thing is every other guy

880
00:48:29,080 --> 00:48:31,799
Speaker 1: that didn't um, I want to be my boyfriend never

881
00:48:31,880 --> 00:48:33,479
Speaker 1: had a problem with it. L O L. I said,

882
00:48:33,480 --> 00:48:35,680
Speaker 1: guys need to understand that these toys do not replace them.

883
00:48:35,840 --> 00:48:38,160
Speaker 1: We need them to make these toys work best. I

884
00:48:38,160 --> 00:48:39,799
Speaker 1: would rather have a guy in a vibe over a

885
00:48:39,880 --> 00:48:42,560
Speaker 1: vibe alone any day. She said, exactly. And it's a compliment.

886
00:48:42,600 --> 00:48:44,440
Speaker 1: We want to share it with them. I said, they

887
00:48:44,440 --> 00:48:47,400
Speaker 1: don't make guys absolutely, we need them to hold them.

888
00:48:47,440 --> 00:48:49,319
Speaker 1: And she said, yeah, I get I get off more

889
00:48:49,320 --> 00:48:52,040
Speaker 1: often when he's not when he's involved with you know,

890
00:48:52,120 --> 00:48:57,240
Speaker 1: with the toy. She goes, my hand gets tired holding it, um.

891
00:48:57,280 --> 00:48:59,080
Speaker 1: And then I said, it's so nice to have someone

892
00:48:59,160 --> 00:49:01,160
Speaker 1: do it, and she said, and they're learning to. I'm

893
00:49:01,160 --> 00:49:05,520
Speaker 1: all about it, um, And it just sucks that there

894
00:49:05,520 --> 00:49:09,799
Speaker 1: are any girls like this girl is like a cool, sucking, opinionated,

895
00:49:09,840 --> 00:49:12,160
Speaker 1: funny girl that is dealing with a guy who's insecure

896
00:49:12,160 --> 00:49:15,120
Speaker 1: about that. It's just like, I think that just sets

897
00:49:15,160 --> 00:49:18,080
Speaker 1: the stage for a lot of insecurity elsewhere in the relationship.

898
00:49:18,120 --> 00:49:21,200
Speaker 1: It makes me nervous when they're when guys have that

899
00:49:21,320 --> 00:49:23,680
Speaker 1: hang up, But I get it. We just need to

900
00:49:23,680 --> 00:49:26,640
Speaker 1: dismantle it by telling the truth, because I think guys

901
00:49:26,719 --> 00:49:28,960
Speaker 1: just it would be like if a guy had a

902
00:49:29,000 --> 00:49:32,840
Speaker 1: fuck doll and you would take offense to that somehow,

903
00:49:32,880 --> 00:49:34,920
Speaker 1: And maybe we don't understand it fully. I don't know.

904
00:49:37,160 --> 00:49:39,320
Speaker 1: If I was having sex with a fun doll underneath

905
00:49:39,320 --> 00:49:43,799
Speaker 1: your ass, would probably wouldn't be Yeah, I don't know,

906
00:49:43,840 --> 00:49:47,680
Speaker 1: I like doll. I know. No, It's like, I'm what

907
00:49:47,719 --> 00:49:49,960
Speaker 1: if the guy, okay, what if Okay, here's a scenario.

908
00:49:50,040 --> 00:49:53,920
Speaker 1: You're hooking up with the guy he can't orgasm, he goes,

909
00:49:54,000 --> 00:49:57,000
Speaker 1: he has to go roll over and have sex with

910
00:49:57,080 --> 00:49:59,960
Speaker 1: the fun doll to come in front of you. Hot.

911
00:50:00,520 --> 00:50:02,160
Speaker 1: I would say I would be fine with that too,

912
00:50:02,160 --> 00:50:04,280
Speaker 1: because I would say it's not me, it's not because

913
00:50:05,680 --> 00:50:11,799
Speaker 1: human woman. I would no, but would be nothing like you. Well,

914
00:50:11,920 --> 00:50:15,480
Speaker 1: I get your joke, but I really do think that

915
00:50:15,520 --> 00:50:17,719
Speaker 1: I wouldn't care because I would go this guy has

916
00:50:17,800 --> 00:50:19,759
Speaker 1: been trained to get off with this fun doll when

917
00:50:19,760 --> 00:50:23,839
Speaker 1: I haven't been in his life, and I he it's

918
00:50:23,880 --> 00:50:27,080
Speaker 1: not just my vagina, it's no girl's vagina like this thing.

919
00:50:27,360 --> 00:50:29,680
Speaker 1: I can never be the same vagina as a fun doll.

920
00:50:29,680 --> 00:50:33,319
Speaker 1: I would never feel I would never feel jealous of

921
00:50:33,360 --> 00:50:37,960
Speaker 1: a thing, of a piece of in bed with him. Yeah,

922
00:50:39,480 --> 00:50:41,959
Speaker 1: and I could suck a stick all. I could kiss

923
00:50:42,040 --> 00:50:43,960
Speaker 1: him while he's sucking the fun like. There's things that

924
00:50:44,000 --> 00:50:46,480
Speaker 1: I can bring to the fund situation that alone, the

925
00:50:46,520 --> 00:50:50,480
Speaker 1: fund would not provide for him, even if it's in

926
00:50:50,480 --> 00:50:56,000
Speaker 1: the in the closet, going back every time. I don't

927
00:50:56,040 --> 00:50:59,960
Speaker 1: care because because I understand that men have sexual dysfunction

928
00:51:00,000 --> 00:51:03,319
Speaker 1: and just as women do dysfunction, meaning we have been

929
00:51:03,360 --> 00:51:06,640
Speaker 1: trained to get off on our own when we're single

930
00:51:07,239 --> 00:51:09,760
Speaker 1: with these toys, and we have become addicted to porn,

931
00:51:09,760 --> 00:51:14,120
Speaker 1: addicted to toys and are and I've raised the bar

932
00:51:14,239 --> 00:51:16,200
Speaker 1: for what how much pressure I need on my vagina

933
00:51:16,239 --> 00:51:18,680
Speaker 1: and how much stimulation I need And it's because of toys.

934
00:51:19,200 --> 00:51:22,000
Speaker 1: And that doesn't mean that I should now have to like, like,

935
00:51:22,360 --> 00:51:25,160
Speaker 1: you know, it's like salting your food like it would be.

936
00:51:25,719 --> 00:51:28,239
Speaker 1: It's embarrassing. Chefs don't like it when you salt your food.

937
00:51:28,239 --> 00:51:30,000
Speaker 1: But it's like, well, bit, I don't have a chef

938
00:51:30,040 --> 00:51:31,880
Speaker 1: cooking for me all the time, so I've grown accustomed

939
00:51:31,920 --> 00:51:33,920
Speaker 1: to really salty food and I'm gonna salt this fucking dish.

940
00:51:33,960 --> 00:51:37,640
Speaker 1: And you shouldn't take offense to it. It's just you

941
00:51:37,640 --> 00:51:40,640
Speaker 1: should wean yourself off and attempted. But it should not

942
00:51:40,680 --> 00:51:42,800
Speaker 1: be offensive to you that because he would be with

943
00:51:42,840 --> 00:51:44,040
Speaker 1: a fun doll if he wanted to be with the

944
00:51:44,080 --> 00:51:46,000
Speaker 1: fun doll. If a guy is with you or a

945
00:51:46,040 --> 00:51:49,040
Speaker 1: girl is with you, they are not If you think

946
00:51:49,040 --> 00:51:50,880
Speaker 1: they're with you for a reason other than being with you,

947
00:51:51,000 --> 00:51:54,040
Speaker 1: that's a whole other thing. But they just trust them

948
00:51:54,040 --> 00:51:55,360
Speaker 1: to not be with you if they don't want to

949
00:51:55,360 --> 00:51:58,480
Speaker 1: be with you. That's just mine. The guy I think

950
00:51:58,840 --> 00:52:01,160
Speaker 1: I have the joke about, you know, feeling like Woody

951
00:52:01,239 --> 00:52:03,399
Speaker 1: from Toy Story with all the new dicks showing up

952
00:52:03,680 --> 00:52:05,960
Speaker 1: and like, yes, I think both can be true that

953
00:52:06,080 --> 00:52:08,719
Speaker 1: like I love like using it and having it as

954
00:52:08,760 --> 00:52:11,879
Speaker 1: like a tag team partner. I really do. And at

955
00:52:11,920 --> 00:52:15,040
Speaker 1: the same point, I'm a little insecure where it's like, oh,

956
00:52:15,080 --> 00:52:17,040
Speaker 1: but I can't do it on my own without my

957
00:52:17,080 --> 00:52:20,120
Speaker 1: tag team partner who might be better than me at

958
00:52:20,120 --> 00:52:23,399
Speaker 1: what he's doing that as a guy that can't come

959
00:52:23,560 --> 00:52:29,279
Speaker 1: like needed your hand like the same way, Yeah, and

960
00:52:29,320 --> 00:52:32,080
Speaker 1: I do, and like I would say of me, is

961
00:52:32,200 --> 00:52:36,560
Speaker 1: teamwork all the way? Yeah, it's still a little into

962
00:52:37,719 --> 00:52:40,080
Speaker 1: so I think, you know, I think if guys can,

963
00:52:40,200 --> 00:52:42,680
Speaker 1: you could come at guys won't come at guy. But

964
00:52:42,760 --> 00:52:44,680
Speaker 1: in that angle of being like, look, I get it,

965
00:52:44,719 --> 00:52:46,719
Speaker 1: you can still be insecure, but also like look at

966
00:52:46,719 --> 00:52:49,080
Speaker 1: as a teacher. Yes, it doesn't have to be like

967
00:52:49,680 --> 00:52:52,480
Speaker 1: you have to. Yeah, don't be insecure your pussy for

968
00:52:52,520 --> 00:52:55,480
Speaker 1: insecut No trust that you're insecure, but you know, realize

969
00:52:55,480 --> 00:52:58,359
Speaker 1: it's coming from places that maybe you need to work

970
00:52:58,400 --> 00:53:02,200
Speaker 1: on outside of the bedroom and it's not that you know, um,

971
00:53:02,280 --> 00:53:05,720
Speaker 1: but yeah, not being critical of being insecure. Play baseball

972
00:53:05,760 --> 00:53:07,200
Speaker 1: catch it's like what are you gonna catch with your

973
00:53:07,239 --> 00:53:09,239
Speaker 1: bare hand? Or you need a mitt? Like amit? What

974
00:53:09,320 --> 00:53:11,120
Speaker 1: are you mad at the mit don't be mad at them.

975
00:53:11,480 --> 00:53:13,719
Speaker 1: I'm catching. I'm catching with my pussy pump. It has

976
00:53:13,760 --> 00:53:16,640
Speaker 1: like a good hollowed out cove that I can catch

977
00:53:17,200 --> 00:53:21,239
Speaker 1: the Yeah, that would be hilarious to be like, okay,

978
00:53:21,640 --> 00:53:23,839
Speaker 1: they'd be like, can we make it Jenna Jamison day

979
00:53:23,880 --> 00:53:26,719
Speaker 1: instead of this whore. Um, Okay, we gotta take a

980
00:53:26,760 --> 00:53:28,560
Speaker 1: quick break. We're gonna come back with why do I Care?

981
00:53:33,640 --> 00:53:35,960
Speaker 1: All right, we're back. Why do I Care? Why do

982
00:53:36,040 --> 00:53:40,480
Speaker 1: I Care? Another story submitted by a couple of besties,

983
00:53:41,080 --> 00:53:45,919
Speaker 1: I'd love to a swift e. Scientist names a new

984
00:53:46,000 --> 00:53:52,400
Speaker 1: millipede specie after Taylor Swift. This got sent to me

985
00:53:52,480 --> 00:53:54,560
Speaker 1: by A Lee who we talked about yesterday. Who's the

986
00:53:54,560 --> 00:53:57,120
Speaker 1: one that gave Andrew the advice about the COVID medicine.

987
00:53:57,520 --> 00:54:00,720
Speaker 1: At Lee sent this to me yesterday. I wouldn't handle

988
00:54:00,760 --> 00:54:03,120
Speaker 1: it because it is combining the thing I love most

989
00:54:03,120 --> 00:54:05,480
Speaker 1: in the world with the thing I love the least.

990
00:54:05,640 --> 00:54:08,839
Speaker 1: Filipedes and centipedes are my number one and two and

991
00:54:09,040 --> 00:54:16,600
Speaker 1: um house centipedes, millipedes the fact that the work does

992
00:54:16,680 --> 00:54:21,000
Speaker 1: buy them something. So what is it called? Alright, So

993
00:54:21,440 --> 00:54:27,239
Speaker 1: this new millipede species is nonarrhea swift a which uh

994
00:54:27,840 --> 00:54:30,719
Speaker 1: is um oh man. I didn't put it. It goes

995
00:54:30,760 --> 00:54:34,160
Speaker 1: because I'm a Taylor Swift fan. Okay, So in his tweet,

996
00:54:34,200 --> 00:54:36,560
Speaker 1: he goes, I'm a big fan of her music, so

997
00:54:36,600 --> 00:54:39,040
Speaker 1: I wanted to show my appreciation by naming this new

998
00:54:39,080 --> 00:54:44,640
Speaker 1: species from Tennessee after her. Hi. Well, she is also

999
00:54:44,840 --> 00:54:48,279
Speaker 1: you know, from Tennessee. Now she is originally from Pennsylvania.

1000
00:54:48,320 --> 00:54:50,480
Speaker 1: But I love this. I would probably do the same thing.

1001
00:54:50,680 --> 00:54:54,520
Speaker 1: When I was asked what Cardinals Jersey number I wanted,

1002
00:54:54,600 --> 00:54:57,600
Speaker 1: I picked thirteen because I'm a swifty and that's swift ease,

1003
00:54:57,719 --> 00:54:59,879
Speaker 1: that's the number. I almost picked nineteen because I used

1004
00:54:59,880 --> 00:55:02,439
Speaker 1: to be my favorite number because one nine is Dave

1005
00:55:02,480 --> 00:55:06,480
Speaker 1: Matthew's birthday. But I have let that go funky and

1006
00:55:07,400 --> 00:55:09,719
Speaker 1: so at thirty, I would probably do the same thing.

1007
00:55:10,480 --> 00:55:14,440
Speaker 1: I have to say that lately, I don't know how

1008
00:55:14,480 --> 00:55:21,560
Speaker 1: to say this. My Taylor Swift obsession has been relaxing,

1009
00:55:21,800 --> 00:55:25,399
Speaker 1: and I don't know why. It's maybe just I still

1010
00:55:25,440 --> 00:55:29,359
Speaker 1: love her, I still consume everything. The obsession, though, is

1011
00:55:29,719 --> 00:55:34,480
Speaker 1: there's just less of a like, I don't know what's happening.

1012
00:55:34,480 --> 00:55:36,960
Speaker 1: Maybe I'm maturing. Finally, I don't know what's going on,

1013
00:55:37,560 --> 00:55:39,840
Speaker 1: but I don't when I go. I don't need to

1014
00:55:39,880 --> 00:55:43,080
Speaker 1: listen to her constantly. I don't need to because also

1015
00:55:43,160 --> 00:55:44,880
Speaker 1: we haven't had a lot of new music in a while,

1016
00:55:45,239 --> 00:55:47,680
Speaker 1: and also none of her songs I'm happy right now,

1017
00:55:47,719 --> 00:55:52,719
Speaker 1: so number her songs besides are really hitting it for me.

1018
00:55:53,320 --> 00:55:55,959
Speaker 1: This is a typical pattern with obsession, by the way,

1019
00:55:56,000 --> 00:55:59,080
Speaker 1: like if you took a graph and you have you know,

1020
00:55:59,160 --> 00:56:02,680
Speaker 1: like how much you're obsessed versus time, the line always

1021
00:56:02,680 --> 00:56:06,560
Speaker 1: shoots up like straight up, so you can't maintain I've

1022
00:56:06,600 --> 00:56:10,520
Speaker 1: maintained this obsession for a really long time. And I

1023
00:56:10,560 --> 00:56:14,719
Speaker 1: also have loved much before Dave Matthews Band and yeah,

1024
00:56:14,719 --> 00:56:17,680
Speaker 1: Phoebe Bridgers. I'm very much into right now. I've talked

1025
00:56:17,719 --> 00:56:20,279
Speaker 1: about a little bit. It's she's not even close to

1026
00:56:20,280 --> 00:56:24,520
Speaker 1: replacing Taylor at this point, um, but I just I'm

1027
00:56:24,640 --> 00:56:28,160
Speaker 1: for some reason, I've been really into just new music

1028
00:56:28,520 --> 00:56:35,280
Speaker 1: and um music really by people who are inspired by Taylor,

1029
00:56:35,320 --> 00:56:38,000
Speaker 1: Olivia Rodrigo as well, like these are all kind of

1030
00:56:38,000 --> 00:56:41,560
Speaker 1: disciples of Taylor Swift that have come out of uh,

1031
00:56:41,760 --> 00:56:44,279
Speaker 1: what she's made. So and also I'm really into like

1032
00:56:44,920 --> 00:56:48,640
Speaker 1: Girl in Red, I'm into um and King Princess. I'm

1033
00:56:48,760 --> 00:56:52,000
Speaker 1: so into King Princess. I am into sad girl rock,

1034
00:56:52,960 --> 00:56:57,520
Speaker 1: but I'm into lesbian sad girl rock more specifically Girl

1035
00:56:57,560 --> 00:57:01,600
Speaker 1: in Red and King Princess, Are and Fletcher I'm I'm

1036
00:57:01,640 --> 00:57:06,640
Speaker 1: into as well. They're all uh, they're all lesbians, and

1037
00:57:07,080 --> 00:57:09,880
Speaker 1: there's just something badass about these girls who are singing

1038
00:57:09,880 --> 00:57:14,359
Speaker 1: about women. There's this one song, Oh Teak and Sarah

1039
00:57:14,400 --> 00:57:16,720
Speaker 1: I've I've loved forever. I fucking love them so much,

1040
00:57:16,720 --> 00:57:20,840
Speaker 1: but um, I uh, the Girl in Red does this

1041
00:57:20,880 --> 00:57:23,280
Speaker 1: song Calls and I had a dream about it last night.

1042
00:57:23,960 --> 00:57:28,480
Speaker 1: Um it's it's called girls, and she goes, They're so

1043
00:57:28,560 --> 00:57:32,200
Speaker 1: pretty it hurts. I'm not talking about boys. I'm talking

1044
00:57:32,240 --> 00:57:35,920
Speaker 1: about girls. They're so pretty with their buttoned up shirts,

1045
00:57:37,680 --> 00:57:40,040
Speaker 1: and it's just all about like, I know I should

1046
00:57:40,040 --> 00:57:43,680
Speaker 1: be into this guy, but these feelings like she's talking about,

1047
00:57:43,680 --> 00:57:45,600
Speaker 1: like I'm supposed to like guys, but I like girls.

1048
00:57:46,000 --> 00:57:48,760
Speaker 1: I love these songs, and it's I think it's not

1049
00:57:48,800 --> 00:57:51,080
Speaker 1: because I'm like India girls or whatever. People keep writing

1050
00:57:51,080 --> 00:57:52,520
Speaker 1: me being like are you coming out? Because I made

1051
00:57:52,520 --> 00:57:54,760
Speaker 1: a post on Andrew's post that I said, you know,

1052
00:57:54,800 --> 00:57:57,600
Speaker 1: I appreciate him being a straight friend to a straight

1053
00:57:57,680 --> 00:57:59,760
Speaker 1: a straight man being a good friend to a straight

1054
00:57:59,840 --> 00:58:01,880
Speaker 1: and I put a question mark woman. I do believe

1055
00:58:01,920 --> 00:58:04,640
Speaker 1: I'm fluid and could be into girls. I don't think

1056
00:58:04,680 --> 00:58:07,600
Speaker 1: that I'm mostly gay or anything like that. But um,

1057
00:58:07,640 --> 00:58:10,760
Speaker 1: I don't know if you out there have any recommendations

1058
00:58:10,760 --> 00:58:14,200
Speaker 1: of any other lesbian rock I love or like indie rock.

1059
00:58:14,440 --> 00:58:18,200
Speaker 1: Melissa Etheridge, I fucking love her. She has the songle

1060
00:58:18,240 --> 00:58:20,600
Speaker 1: I Want to Be in Love where in the music

1061
00:58:20,680 --> 00:58:23,360
Speaker 1: video she is hitting on Jennifer Anderson and it's one

1062
00:58:23,360 --> 00:58:26,520
Speaker 1: of the hottest music videos ever. Um so check that out.

1063
00:58:26,840 --> 00:58:30,120
Speaker 1: Let's get to our Wednesday game, which is a wild card.

1064
00:58:30,440 --> 00:58:32,120
Speaker 1: We haven't played it for a while. It's time for

1065
00:58:32,360 --> 00:58:36,120
Speaker 1: finish my sentence. Finished my sentence is I was sounding

1066
00:58:36,120 --> 00:58:37,640
Speaker 1: like I was gonna say brought to you by but

1067
00:58:37,680 --> 00:58:40,600
Speaker 1: it is brought to you by Noah's brain today because

1068
00:58:40,640 --> 00:58:44,760
Speaker 1: she was like, we should do finish my sentence, and uh,

1069
00:58:44,800 --> 00:58:48,640
Speaker 1: Andrew and I will try to complete each other's sentences

1070
00:58:49,080 --> 00:58:51,920
Speaker 1: what we think we would say for each other, and

1071
00:58:51,960 --> 00:58:54,160
Speaker 1: then we will weigh in on how well we know

1072
00:58:54,240 --> 00:58:57,840
Speaker 1: each other. Alright, what is a sentence? Noah today has

1073
00:58:57,880 --> 00:59:01,280
Speaker 1: finished my sentence is the bad bad habit I wish

1074
00:59:01,360 --> 00:59:06,040
Speaker 1: I could let go of. Is all right? Who would

1075
00:59:06,080 --> 00:59:12,600
Speaker 1: like to go first? I'll go first as Andrew. Yes, Hi, guys,

1076
00:59:12,600 --> 00:59:15,720
Speaker 1: I'm Andrew. Yeah, what's up out there? What's up out there? Guys?

1077
00:59:15,760 --> 00:59:18,120
Speaker 1: What's up? Okay? Okay, okay, here we go, Here we go.

1078
00:59:18,960 --> 00:59:22,800
Speaker 1: So I'm pretty cool. The bad habit I would like

1079
00:59:22,880 --> 00:59:32,360
Speaker 1: to get rid of is putting on calling my mom

1080
00:59:32,520 --> 00:59:39,400
Speaker 1: h and and just like procrastinating on uh on on

1081
00:59:39,520 --> 00:59:42,000
Speaker 1: calling my mom. It's probably the bad habit that I

1082
00:59:42,040 --> 00:59:45,640
Speaker 1: would like to just have lifted. Did I just like

1083
00:59:46,120 --> 00:59:50,320
Speaker 1: figures or ears out for you? Yeah? That was yours too.

1084
00:59:51,640 --> 00:59:54,800
Speaker 1: I mean, honestly, it's my aunt Sally. But yes, I'm protecting.

1085
00:59:55,120 --> 00:59:58,320
Speaker 1: Why is my mom? Why is it hard? Because you know,

1086
00:59:58,360 --> 01:00:01,480
Speaker 1: my mom's sick and so and yeah, it's hard to hear.

1087
01:00:01,560 --> 01:00:04,280
Speaker 1: It's hard to be confronted with that, and yeah, it's

1088
01:00:04,440 --> 01:00:07,640
Speaker 1: it's tough. Also, she's silver for twelve years now or

1089
01:00:07,640 --> 01:00:09,480
Speaker 1: so and so, and you fall off the wagon and

1090
01:00:09,480 --> 01:00:12,560
Speaker 1: you're just why don't you just down a couple of

1091
01:00:13,080 --> 01:00:15,280
Speaker 1: white claws and give her callings? Maybe that would be

1092
01:00:15,280 --> 01:00:20,600
Speaker 1: the Curt Scholar. I drink too many I forgot uh

1093
01:00:20,640 --> 01:00:23,360
Speaker 1: I whye clawed that phone? What do you think about

1094
01:00:23,360 --> 01:00:26,680
Speaker 1: my prediction? What do you mean? Does it ring true

1095
01:00:26,720 --> 01:00:29,240
Speaker 1: for you? Or is there one that you definitely rings true?

1096
01:00:29,320 --> 01:00:31,200
Speaker 1: I mean no, it's so funny that it rings so

1097
01:00:31,240 --> 01:00:33,360
Speaker 1: true because I just had, you know, my birthday, my

1098
01:00:33,360 --> 01:00:35,720
Speaker 1: mom called me. I didn't call her back. You know,

1099
01:00:35,760 --> 01:00:38,640
Speaker 1: I was dealing with COVID and ship whatever. But and

1100
01:00:38,680 --> 01:00:41,360
Speaker 1: then she You know, the thing that parents do is

1101
01:00:41,400 --> 01:00:43,480
Speaker 1: maybe they won't call you for like five weeks, and

1102
01:00:43,480 --> 01:00:45,400
Speaker 1: then they'll call you two days in a row and go, well,

1103
01:00:45,400 --> 01:00:47,720
Speaker 1: why don't you call me back? It's like, well, this

1104
01:00:47,760 --> 01:00:49,880
Speaker 1: isn't like an ongoing thing, like what are we doing here?

1105
01:00:49,920 --> 01:00:52,800
Speaker 1: Like this is why I don't at times because now

1106
01:00:52,840 --> 01:00:54,800
Speaker 1: you're gonna make me feel bad because I didn't call

1107
01:00:54,840 --> 01:00:57,080
Speaker 1: back with it. And then I play that all up

1108
01:00:57,080 --> 01:00:58,880
Speaker 1: in my head and I'm like, oh, well now I'm

1109
01:00:58,880 --> 01:01:03,120
Speaker 1: holding Now I'm waiting. Too many times I've done that

1110
01:01:03,520 --> 01:01:05,760
Speaker 1: where you know what I found though, and maybe this

1111
01:01:05,800 --> 01:01:07,480
Speaker 1: is this isn't just advice to you, because I know

1112
01:01:07,520 --> 01:01:10,240
Speaker 1: you get it, but I've been such a person that

1113
01:01:10,840 --> 01:01:13,920
Speaker 1: forgets to write back emails, for doesn't return calls and

1114
01:01:13,920 --> 01:01:15,320
Speaker 1: then I wait too long and it gets to the

1115
01:01:15,320 --> 01:01:17,320
Speaker 1: point where if I do, I have to address the

1116
01:01:17,320 --> 01:01:20,000
Speaker 1: fact that I haven't, and so you just ghost that person.

1117
01:01:20,720 --> 01:01:25,440
Speaker 1: I really have found that saying to the person either

1118
01:01:25,520 --> 01:01:27,000
Speaker 1: in the email that you write back to, I have

1119
01:01:27,040 --> 01:01:28,880
Speaker 1: an email that I have to write today, actually to

1120
01:01:29,360 --> 01:01:32,320
Speaker 1: a fucking executive at HBO, who is someone that could

1121
01:01:32,360 --> 01:01:33,920
Speaker 1: give me a TV show. I haven't written back to

1122
01:01:33,920 --> 01:01:35,960
Speaker 1: her because it was just such a big deal. I mean,

1123
01:01:36,160 --> 01:01:37,760
Speaker 1: here's what I wrote to Bill Maher. I'll give you

1124
01:01:37,760 --> 01:01:41,120
Speaker 1: an example. So, Bill Maher, I'm not trying to brag,

1125
01:01:41,320 --> 01:01:43,000
Speaker 1: but this is just an example of like, why would't

1126
01:01:43,000 --> 01:01:45,560
Speaker 1: I rive it back to Bill fucking mar And the

1127
01:01:45,600 --> 01:01:47,920
Speaker 1: truth is because the ones you don't write back to

1128
01:01:48,280 --> 01:01:51,200
Speaker 1: are generally the ones that mean the most. It's not

1129
01:01:51,360 --> 01:01:53,760
Speaker 1: that they mean the least. It means they mean the most.

1130
01:01:53,800 --> 01:01:55,919
Speaker 1: And you can actually say that if it's true for you.

1131
01:01:56,400 --> 01:02:01,560
Speaker 1: So I wrote to him recently, hold on, let me

1132
01:02:01,600 --> 01:02:07,480
Speaker 1: just pull this up. Um. So he wrote me, and

1133
01:02:07,480 --> 01:02:13,960
Speaker 1: then I I didn't get back to him, uh for

1134
01:02:14,040 --> 01:02:16,400
Speaker 1: six days, which to me is a long time, especially

1135
01:02:16,440 --> 01:02:20,200
Speaker 1: with like I just with Bill like it was. It was.

1136
01:02:20,320 --> 01:02:25,520
Speaker 1: It was something worried if he wrote because no, well,

1137
01:02:25,600 --> 01:02:28,720
Speaker 1: we've had past interactions which haven't gone smoothly on email,

1138
01:02:28,760 --> 01:02:30,760
Speaker 1: but we are so past that. Like he's a good

1139
01:02:30,800 --> 01:02:32,800
Speaker 1: I feel I consider him like we signed off, like

1140
01:02:32,840 --> 01:02:34,920
Speaker 1: I love you, like I love Bill Maher, like he

1141
01:02:35,080 --> 01:02:38,840
Speaker 1: is someone a dear friend. At this point after our trip,

1142
01:02:39,120 --> 01:02:41,200
Speaker 1: I said, Bill, for whatever reason, I always put off

1143
01:02:41,240 --> 01:02:43,360
Speaker 1: writing you back because I still have you on a pedestal.

1144
01:02:44,120 --> 01:02:47,200
Speaker 1: Uh in parentheses, you're not coming down anytime soon. And

1145
01:02:47,240 --> 01:02:48,920
Speaker 1: then I just keep waiting until I feel like I

1146
01:02:48,920 --> 01:02:50,760
Speaker 1: have time to really make myself sound as cool and

1147
01:02:50,800 --> 01:02:52,680
Speaker 1: as smart as possible. Then it just gets to the

1148
01:02:52,680 --> 01:02:54,439
Speaker 1: point where it seems like I'm not writing back because

1149
01:02:54,440 --> 01:02:57,240
Speaker 1: I don't care, which honestly might be the coolest look possible.

1150
01:02:57,360 --> 01:03:00,280
Speaker 1: So I guess my system works. Kidding it's so lame

1151
01:03:00,320 --> 01:03:02,200
Speaker 1: of me. But just like, I would never take it

1152
01:03:02,240 --> 01:03:03,960
Speaker 1: personally if you want Oh, he had written me that

1153
01:03:04,000 --> 01:03:05,840
Speaker 1: he had to unfollow me because he had to wipe

1154
01:03:05,840 --> 01:03:08,920
Speaker 1: his Instagram clean, and he was like, hey, I unfollowed

1155
01:03:08,960 --> 01:03:11,720
Speaker 1: you don't think don't read into it, I said, but

1156
01:03:11,840 --> 01:03:13,720
Speaker 1: just like I would never take it personally, if you

1157
01:03:13,720 --> 01:03:15,400
Speaker 1: want followed me, I hope you don't take my lag

1158
01:03:15,440 --> 01:03:17,480
Speaker 1: in response as anything other than me being in my

1159
01:03:17,520 --> 01:03:19,840
Speaker 1: own head about being friends with someone who I idolize.

1160
01:03:20,320 --> 01:03:21,920
Speaker 1: I said. We can talk all about all of this

1161
01:03:21,960 --> 01:03:23,560
Speaker 1: and more on the podcast. I can't fucking wait to

1162
01:03:23,560 --> 01:03:25,760
Speaker 1: hang out with you again. Thanks for having me. Love you, Nikki,

1163
01:03:26,280 --> 01:03:30,000
Speaker 1: And it just I guess, just being honest about it,

1164
01:03:30,080 --> 01:03:34,920
Speaker 1: Like even you know my aunt Sally, who I dread

1165
01:03:34,960 --> 01:03:36,760
Speaker 1: every day. I'm gonna get a call that she's dead,

1166
01:03:36,840 --> 01:03:39,280
Speaker 1: and then I'll regret not talking to this cookie woman

1167
01:03:39,320 --> 01:03:41,520
Speaker 1: who talks very slow, which is hard for me to

1168
01:03:41,520 --> 01:03:43,080
Speaker 1: talk to someone who talks slow. But she has a

1169
01:03:43,120 --> 01:03:46,080
Speaker 1: fucking she said seizures that my her dog like this.

1170
01:03:46,400 --> 01:03:49,360
Speaker 1: But she's so funny and so cool, and I don't

1171
01:03:49,400 --> 01:03:50,920
Speaker 1: call her. She calls me all the time, and I

1172
01:03:50,960 --> 01:03:52,480
Speaker 1: always let me go to voicemail. I don't even have

1173
01:03:52,480 --> 01:03:54,480
Speaker 1: a voice bail anmore because she can't. She can't even

1174
01:03:54,520 --> 01:03:59,000
Speaker 1: read leave me a voice message, and I I think

1175
01:03:59,040 --> 01:04:01,920
Speaker 1: that the solution is to She never gives me shit

1176
01:04:02,000 --> 01:04:03,920
Speaker 1: about it ever, But I think it's just being honest

1177
01:04:03,920 --> 01:04:07,200
Speaker 1: and being like Sally, I love you so much, and

1178
01:04:07,280 --> 01:04:10,360
Speaker 1: I get sad talking to you because I feel like

1179
01:04:10,440 --> 01:04:13,560
Speaker 1: I should call you more and I want you to

1180
01:04:13,560 --> 01:04:15,960
Speaker 1: be happy, and it just just you know, just being

1181
01:04:15,960 --> 01:04:18,520
Speaker 1: honest about the overwhelming part of it. Does that is

1182
01:04:18,520 --> 01:04:20,320
Speaker 1: that something that you could do to your mom Andrew

1183
01:04:20,320 --> 01:04:22,160
Speaker 1: and just be like, I kind of get scared that

1184
01:04:22,160 --> 01:04:24,080
Speaker 1: you're gonna give me shit about not calling you, and

1185
01:04:24,120 --> 01:04:26,200
Speaker 1: that's maybe why I delay even more. And I'm really

1186
01:04:26,520 --> 01:04:29,040
Speaker 1: you know, yeah, And I've had that conversation before in

1187
01:04:29,080 --> 01:04:31,120
Speaker 1: the past, and I've been honest about that. I do

1188
01:04:31,200 --> 01:04:33,920
Speaker 1: think also there's something to like putting Bill Maher on

1189
01:04:33,960 --> 01:04:36,080
Speaker 1: a pedestal, or if I put like, you know, I

1190
01:04:36,120 --> 01:04:38,480
Speaker 1: got back to Jake Ohen like, but like, why am

1191
01:04:38,480 --> 01:04:40,480
Speaker 1: I not getting back to my own mother? It's like

1192
01:04:40,560 --> 01:04:43,880
Speaker 1: why are we putting these celebrities whatever? And I know

1193
01:04:43,920 --> 01:04:48,040
Speaker 1: they're head of like people that like really matter to you.

1194
01:04:48,080 --> 01:04:52,840
Speaker 1: And partly is because because you, yeah, okay, let's get

1195
01:04:52,880 --> 01:04:54,720
Speaker 1: to mind. We you we you do mind? I think you.

1196
01:04:55,040 --> 01:04:57,760
Speaker 1: I mean I could have the same one. So my yeah,

1197
01:04:58,000 --> 01:05:01,160
Speaker 1: the sentences, the bad habit wish I could let go

1198
01:05:01,280 --> 01:05:04,960
Speaker 1: of is you have to say I'm maybe Blazer, Hi,

1199
01:05:05,040 --> 01:05:08,560
Speaker 1: I'm Nikki, I'm the one that you know again throws

1200
01:05:08,560 --> 01:05:12,439
Speaker 1: a baseball and stuff. Whatever I'm having like dating. It's

1201
01:05:12,440 --> 01:05:14,720
Speaker 1: like I have like a key coming at me about

1202
01:05:14,760 --> 01:05:17,520
Speaker 1: like ballpark, village whatever. It's not a big deal. My

1203
01:05:17,600 --> 01:05:19,160
Speaker 1: name is going to be on top of a sign

1204
01:05:19,200 --> 01:05:22,200
Speaker 1: on top of a building I know one'll ever see anyhow,

1205
01:05:24,800 --> 01:05:29,439
Speaker 1: um no, my my biggest um. I would say, wait,

1206
01:05:29,480 --> 01:05:31,080
Speaker 1: what was the word? I'm sorry now I forgot the

1207
01:05:31,080 --> 01:05:34,480
Speaker 1: sentence I was going on that bad habit maybe would

1208
01:05:34,480 --> 01:05:41,240
Speaker 1: be maybe being a little two judgmental of uh, someone's

1209
01:05:41,240 --> 01:05:47,400
Speaker 1: significant other right when I meet them. Wait wait, oh oh,

1210
01:05:47,640 --> 01:05:49,920
Speaker 1: I see what you're saying. Oh right now, I'm not

1211
01:05:50,000 --> 01:05:51,800
Speaker 1: We're not talking about Brenna, by the way, I think

1212
01:05:51,800 --> 01:05:55,000
Speaker 1: people are anything I'm talking about. Oh no, no, no, no, no, no,

1213
01:05:55,240 --> 01:05:57,440
Speaker 1: um no. I love that part of me, and I

1214
01:05:57,480 --> 01:06:02,280
Speaker 1: think I'm right. I'm not looking to get rid of

1215
01:06:02,280 --> 01:06:06,280
Speaker 1: that at all. Know, when my friends are in a

1216
01:06:06,320 --> 01:06:14,560
Speaker 1: bad relationship, no, within minutes, I give, I give you know.

1217
01:06:14,680 --> 01:06:18,720
Speaker 1: And this is also formulated from watching Instagram stories, you know,

1218
01:06:18,760 --> 01:06:22,120
Speaker 1: collecting data along the way. I for someone who's been

1219
01:06:22,160 --> 01:06:27,960
Speaker 1: in bad relationships faking it are just swearing, I would

1220
01:06:27,960 --> 01:06:29,600
Speaker 1: say that that is not something I'm looking to get

1221
01:06:29,640 --> 01:06:34,240
Speaker 1: rid of. Although I will say being judgmental in general. Yes,

1222
01:06:34,880 --> 01:06:37,080
Speaker 1: I think the bad habit I'm looking to get rid

1223
01:06:37,120 --> 01:06:45,040
Speaker 1: of would be um. Uh, what about assuming you know

1224
01:06:45,120 --> 01:06:49,240
Speaker 1: the whole story? Without knowing the whole story? I think

1225
01:06:49,240 --> 01:06:52,080
Speaker 1: that's um Again, I think that's the something I wouldn't

1226
01:06:52,080 --> 01:06:54,040
Speaker 1: want to get rid of it because because I do that,

1227
01:06:54,200 --> 01:06:57,080
Speaker 1: I'm just saying it's it makes me a good comedian

1228
01:06:57,120 --> 01:06:59,400
Speaker 1: because I can go I it's part of my A

1229
01:06:59,480 --> 01:07:02,040
Speaker 1: d D. I know the whole story, which I know.

1230
01:07:02,560 --> 01:07:04,760
Speaker 1: The thing is, I will say, I will admit when

1231
01:07:04,760 --> 01:07:07,720
Speaker 1: I'm wrong, so I don't have a problem being wrong

1232
01:07:08,840 --> 01:07:11,520
Speaker 1: and and going all the way. That skill that I

1233
01:07:11,560 --> 01:07:14,120
Speaker 1: have of taking things too far and seeing and like

1234
01:07:14,240 --> 01:07:16,840
Speaker 1: going so far that I like know the outcome years

1235
01:07:16,840 --> 01:07:19,480
Speaker 1: from now. You know me saying I don't want to

1236
01:07:19,480 --> 01:07:21,120
Speaker 1: get married because I don't want to get divorced and

1237
01:07:21,120 --> 01:07:22,320
Speaker 1: I don't want to go to Target to have to

1238
01:07:22,320 --> 01:07:24,240
Speaker 1: pick out a pencil skirt to wear to court, Like

1239
01:07:24,320 --> 01:07:26,960
Speaker 1: that's that's a joke that came from me taking things

1240
01:07:27,000 --> 01:07:29,320
Speaker 1: too far and going like, why are you already divorced?

1241
01:07:29,320 --> 01:07:31,200
Speaker 1: You don't want to get engaged because you don't want

1242
01:07:31,200 --> 01:07:32,680
Speaker 1: to go to pick out a pencil skirt to wear

1243
01:07:32,680 --> 01:07:36,760
Speaker 1: to court. That's funny. But so I will say that

1244
01:07:36,840 --> 01:07:39,640
Speaker 1: I there's something too that though, and I agree with you,

1245
01:07:39,680 --> 01:07:42,800
Speaker 1: which is um I want. I would like to be

1246
01:07:42,800 --> 01:07:48,280
Speaker 1: better about just leading with love, even and even when

1247
01:07:48,320 --> 01:07:51,240
Speaker 1: I am thinking that someone isn't right for my friend

1248
01:07:51,400 --> 01:07:54,640
Speaker 1: that they're dating, just leading with love and knowing that

1249
01:07:54,720 --> 01:07:57,720
Speaker 1: it's not about me. I would like to. I think

1250
01:07:57,760 --> 01:08:02,040
Speaker 1: so often I get into this thing of like how

1251
01:08:02,120 --> 01:08:04,640
Speaker 1: I'm feeling in a situation. Let's say my friends starts

1252
01:08:04,680 --> 01:08:08,520
Speaker 1: dating someone and they're not paying me enough attention or

1253
01:08:08,560 --> 01:08:12,600
Speaker 1: they're acting weird around me. I have to realize that

1254
01:08:13,520 --> 01:08:15,640
Speaker 1: they're not thinking of me. They're not thinking I'm being

1255
01:08:15,680 --> 01:08:18,840
Speaker 1: weird around Nikki. I am choosing they're just trying to

1256
01:08:18,880 --> 01:08:21,760
Speaker 1: survive in this weird ass relationship they're in, which I've

1257
01:08:21,920 --> 01:08:25,000
Speaker 1: I know, but I'm taking it personally like it's affective.

1258
01:08:25,680 --> 01:08:27,519
Speaker 1: Most of the time, when people are struggling in their

1259
01:08:27,560 --> 01:08:30,280
Speaker 1: own lives, everyone else is affected. But they can't handle

1260
01:08:30,320 --> 01:08:33,960
Speaker 1: these little, you know, peripheral issues, these little fires that

1261
01:08:34,000 --> 01:08:36,080
Speaker 1: you might be one of them. They're not thinking of

1262
01:08:36,120 --> 01:08:39,200
Speaker 1: you because they have a whole fucking smoldering thing to

1263
01:08:39,320 --> 01:08:41,320
Speaker 1: take care of their own life and they're struggling. They're

1264
01:08:41,320 --> 01:08:43,920
Speaker 1: just trying to keep their head above water, and they

1265
01:08:43,960 --> 01:08:48,160
Speaker 1: haven't even begun to address the problems of this relationship.

1266
01:08:48,280 --> 01:08:50,439
Speaker 1: So everything else is affected and they'll get to those

1267
01:08:50,479 --> 01:08:53,400
Speaker 1: things when they address this bigger thing. But it's not

1268
01:08:53,479 --> 01:08:57,559
Speaker 1: about you. And I think that my bad habit that

1269
01:08:57,600 --> 01:08:59,960
Speaker 1: I would let let go of is to be less

1270
01:09:00,040 --> 01:09:02,679
Speaker 1: selfish um, which I'm always trying to do. Even though

1271
01:09:03,160 --> 01:09:05,960
Speaker 1: Nikki Glazer Day is coming up and is a podcast

1272
01:09:06,040 --> 01:09:08,519
Speaker 1: and Welcome Home Nicki Glazers coming to E and my

1273
01:09:08,560 --> 01:09:13,720
Speaker 1: tour One Night with Nicki Glazer is now listen. I

1274
01:09:13,760 --> 01:09:16,680
Speaker 1: only put my name on everything because it is it's

1275
01:09:16,720 --> 01:09:18,920
Speaker 1: not about me being like you guys know, I don't

1276
01:09:18,920 --> 01:09:21,200
Speaker 1: really like myself. I have bad self esteem. I can't

1277
01:09:21,200 --> 01:09:24,240
Speaker 1: even watch myself. It's about me wanting to make more money.

1278
01:09:24,240 --> 01:09:25,800
Speaker 1: It's a branding thing, and I want to make more

1279
01:09:25,800 --> 01:09:27,280
Speaker 1: money so that I can do more good in the

1280
01:09:27,280 --> 01:09:30,320
Speaker 1: world and lend my money to friends. So it's not selfish.

1281
01:09:30,479 --> 01:09:32,879
Speaker 1: But I will say that in conversation, I can sometimes

1282
01:09:32,880 --> 01:09:35,400
Speaker 1: talk too much. On this podcast, I can talk too much,

1283
01:09:35,840 --> 01:09:38,719
Speaker 1: and I would like to be a better listener. Final

1284
01:09:38,760 --> 01:09:43,080
Speaker 1: thoughts though it's like like branding like that. You know,

1285
01:09:43,200 --> 01:09:46,240
Speaker 1: Tom Brady does it. Trump obviously does it, but it's

1286
01:09:46,240 --> 01:09:50,000
Speaker 1: like to do it. It's not, it's not it's not. No,

1287
01:09:50,120 --> 01:09:53,600
Speaker 1: I'm making good financial decisions for myself. What are you

1288
01:09:53,800 --> 01:09:55,800
Speaker 1: supposed to do if I put my name on And

1289
01:09:56,000 --> 01:09:58,600
Speaker 1: I didn't want to put my name on everything initially

1290
01:09:58,760 --> 01:10:01,439
Speaker 1: when I wasn't good enough. But it's it really is

1291
01:10:01,479 --> 01:10:03,880
Speaker 1: about me. If I put my name on things, more

1292
01:10:03,880 --> 01:10:07,480
Speaker 1: people know my name equals more opportunities, equals more money,

1293
01:10:07,520 --> 01:10:09,519
Speaker 1: equals I'm going to survive the apocalypse, and I'm going

1294
01:10:09,560 --> 01:10:11,400
Speaker 1: to be able to support my friends and family who

1295
01:10:11,439 --> 01:10:13,559
Speaker 1: don't make as much money. That's really how I look

1296
01:10:13,600 --> 01:10:16,479
Speaker 1: at it. Um, And I really look and I've said

1297
01:10:16,479 --> 01:10:20,799
Speaker 1: this before, but you know you watching the show Besties

1298
01:10:20,840 --> 01:10:24,320
Speaker 1: out there, which I just learned, there's still seven hundred

1299
01:10:24,840 --> 01:10:28,760
Speaker 1: million cable subscribers in the country. Maybe it's two hundred million.

1300
01:10:29,479 --> 01:10:33,360
Speaker 1: It's crazy. It's so many more than ye or yeah,

1301
01:10:33,360 --> 01:10:36,840
Speaker 1: and that many countries. Um. I read this article about

1302
01:10:37,240 --> 01:10:42,200
Speaker 1: the um why talk shows don't work on streaming services. UM,

1303
01:10:42,320 --> 01:10:46,040
Speaker 1: let me just look up this number. Uh, how many

1304
01:10:46,080 --> 01:10:50,160
Speaker 1: cable subscribers in the US. I didn't know the CEE.

1305
01:10:50,200 --> 01:10:52,000
Speaker 1: I thought no one had cable anymore. You know, we're

1306
01:10:52,000 --> 01:10:58,960
Speaker 1: cutting the cord. We're all going streaming. Uh, seventy million

1307
01:10:59,360 --> 01:11:03,560
Speaker 1: cable subscri ribers still in the US, I've yesterday I

1308
01:11:03,600 --> 01:11:06,080
Speaker 1: read it was like two million. I really did in

1309
01:11:06,120 --> 01:11:08,960
Speaker 1: this I think it's more like two million. If to

1310
01:11:09,000 --> 01:11:13,439
Speaker 1: compare that, Apple TV has like twelve million subscribers. So

1311
01:11:13,520 --> 01:11:15,800
Speaker 1: when you're in a streaming service and that's Apple TV

1312
01:11:15,880 --> 01:11:18,519
Speaker 1: compared to Netflix, I'm sure it's They don't release their numbers.

1313
01:11:18,520 --> 01:11:23,559
Speaker 1: But John Stewart Show got forty thou views the second week.

1314
01:11:23,840 --> 01:11:27,400
Speaker 1: The first week it got like seventy thousand, which is nothing,

1315
01:11:28,439 --> 01:11:31,360
Speaker 1: and the second week it got four like it so

1316
01:11:32,320 --> 01:11:35,720
Speaker 1: and YouTube views he gets like a million. But his

1317
01:11:39,800 --> 01:11:43,080
Speaker 1: Netflix just had the lowest streaming numbers in first quarter

1318
01:11:43,160 --> 01:11:45,320
Speaker 1: or something like that. Yeah, I mean they up their

1319
01:11:45,320 --> 01:11:48,720
Speaker 1: prices and their content. Um, you know, people have a

1320
01:11:48,760 --> 01:11:51,280
Speaker 1: problem with the content, Like it's just not quality content.

1321
01:11:51,360 --> 01:11:54,040
Speaker 1: I think it's better than ever. I'm loving the Ultimatum

1322
01:11:54,160 --> 01:11:57,320
Speaker 1: and Love Is Blind was amazing, and also there's that

1323
01:11:57,439 --> 01:12:01,640
Speaker 1: Jimmy Saville documentary. I've been like consuming so much, but um,

1324
01:12:01,680 --> 01:12:04,479
Speaker 1: I want to just say that people watching Welcome Home

1325
01:12:04,560 --> 01:12:07,880
Speaker 1: Nickie's a question mark on May one. I'm probably gonna

1326
01:12:07,880 --> 01:12:09,880
Speaker 1: be on fallon May second, too, so look out for

1327
01:12:09,920 --> 01:12:14,800
Speaker 1: that is about me, Like I just want people to

1328
01:12:14,800 --> 01:12:16,720
Speaker 1: watch so I can make another season and hang out

1329
01:12:16,720 --> 01:12:21,000
Speaker 1: with Andrew and my boyfriend and my family. That really

1330
01:12:21,040 --> 01:12:23,880
Speaker 1: is not like a money like people are like, please

1331
01:12:23,920 --> 01:12:26,000
Speaker 1: watch this thing. It's always about money. I swear to God,

1332
01:12:26,040 --> 01:12:27,400
Speaker 1: I just want to make shows. I just want to

1333
01:12:27,400 --> 01:12:29,559
Speaker 1: hang out with my family. So that's really what you'd

1334
01:12:29,560 --> 01:12:34,000
Speaker 1: be supporting are for, Like the yeah, you know, I

1335
01:12:34,040 --> 01:12:36,360
Speaker 1: think about the show and I'm like, you know, I

1336
01:12:36,400 --> 01:12:39,160
Speaker 1: see like, uh, what's that show like the the Asian

1337
01:12:39,160 --> 01:12:42,080
Speaker 1: Show where it's like bling and everything is so flashy

1338
01:12:42,240 --> 01:12:44,880
Speaker 1: on TV, and I kind of like that our show,

1339
01:12:46,000 --> 01:12:48,519
Speaker 1: you know it just yes, we do. We go on

1340
01:12:48,520 --> 01:12:50,719
Speaker 1: our gigs and it does seem like kind of cool

1341
01:12:50,760 --> 01:12:53,360
Speaker 1: when we're like, you know, performing, and there is that

1342
01:12:53,479 --> 01:12:56,040
Speaker 1: like aspect of it. But other than that, it really

1343
01:12:56,200 --> 01:13:01,200
Speaker 1: is like just such a relatable like we're just regular people.

1344
01:13:01,200 --> 01:13:04,400
Speaker 1: We're not trying too hard to look you know, like

1345
01:13:04,439 --> 01:13:07,080
Speaker 1: we're just like I know that. Sometimes I'm like worried

1346
01:13:07,120 --> 01:13:09,800
Speaker 1: that people are gonna watch because we're not like, you know,

1347
01:13:09,880 --> 01:13:15,000
Speaker 1: throwing each other down the second that's going to bring

1348
01:13:15,040 --> 01:13:19,040
Speaker 1: something to it. Um, you're right, Like I had those

1349
01:13:19,080 --> 01:13:21,559
Speaker 1: same worried too, because like reality shows are great because

1350
01:13:21,560 --> 01:13:23,680
Speaker 1: of drinking. I mean, I'm watching The Ultimatum and it's

1351
01:13:23,720 --> 01:13:25,679
Speaker 1: like all the ships happening because these people are getting

1352
01:13:25,680 --> 01:13:27,920
Speaker 1: loaded and doing stuff that they regret. I mean, so

1353
01:13:27,960 --> 01:13:31,160
Speaker 1: many reality shows, the best moments flipping tables, throwing wine,

1354
01:13:31,200 --> 01:13:34,880
Speaker 1: it's all centered around drinking, summer house, these fights. Without drinking,

1355
01:13:34,880 --> 01:13:37,360
Speaker 1: it wouldn't happen. And so there's not a lot of

1356
01:13:37,400 --> 01:13:41,040
Speaker 1: like there's just a lot of For me, you know,

1357
01:13:41,160 --> 01:13:44,200
Speaker 1: there was a lot of like painful things that I

1358
01:13:44,240 --> 01:13:46,040
Speaker 1: had to experience and like tough stuff I had to

1359
01:13:46,040 --> 01:13:49,040
Speaker 1: go through during this reality show, um, in terms of

1360
01:13:49,120 --> 01:13:52,240
Speaker 1: therapy and talking to my parents about stuff. So there's that,

1361
01:13:52,280 --> 01:13:56,120
Speaker 1: but there's not a lot of drama. It's just I think,

1362
01:13:56,160 --> 01:14:00,599
Speaker 1: I think though, you know, there's a lot a heart

1363
01:14:00,640 --> 01:14:03,000
Speaker 1: in it. And I really do feel that way. Like

1364
01:14:03,040 --> 01:14:04,720
Speaker 1: I'm just thinking about like when we're on the dock

1365
01:14:04,800 --> 01:14:07,680
Speaker 1: and we're all talking, there's just a lot of family

1366
01:14:08,320 --> 01:14:11,000
Speaker 1: and like and I don't know, and I think people

1367
01:14:11,000 --> 01:14:12,439
Speaker 1: are going to get stuff out of that, and I

1368
01:14:12,479 --> 01:14:15,040
Speaker 1: would hope to think that that is still you know,

1369
01:14:15,080 --> 01:14:17,320
Speaker 1: the Andy Griffiths Show was kind of that, you know

1370
01:14:17,360 --> 01:14:21,280
Speaker 1: what I mean, like like I think like people where

1371
01:14:21,320 --> 01:14:27,840
Speaker 1: where it's like not yeah yeah, okay, that's whistling, that

1372
01:14:27,960 --> 01:14:33,120
Speaker 1: was something. Um yeah, I think like I think that

1373
01:14:33,120 --> 01:14:36,479
Speaker 1: that can still be needed and hopefully it's you don't

1374
01:14:36,479 --> 01:14:39,640
Speaker 1: need to fucking have a flashy bullshit to get to

1375
01:14:39,720 --> 01:14:44,240
Speaker 1: people still, and I yes, but also the flashy bullshit

1376
01:14:44,920 --> 01:14:48,200
Speaker 1: is so much about we still. The show still moves fast,

1377
01:14:48,320 --> 01:14:50,760
Speaker 1: you know. It definitely is you know, just us down

1378
01:14:50,800 --> 01:14:56,240
Speaker 1: by the creek, like just like you know, yeah, the

1379
01:14:56,320 --> 01:15:00,599
Speaker 1: show is manic almost in terms of how it's TikTok

1380
01:15:00,920 --> 01:15:03,960
Speaker 1: like levels of fast. Each scene is like thirty seconds long.

1381
01:15:04,040 --> 01:15:06,519
Speaker 1: So it's like and the first premiere, you guys are

1382
01:15:06,520 --> 01:15:08,800
Speaker 1: gonna love it so much, especially besties are just I

1383
01:15:08,840 --> 01:15:11,720
Speaker 1: don't even worry about them liking it. Everyone's gonna like

1384
01:15:11,800 --> 01:15:14,880
Speaker 1: this show because you can't. It's just funny people doing

1385
01:15:14,880 --> 01:15:17,200
Speaker 1: funny stuff. And I'm the least funny of everyone, I

1386
01:15:17,240 --> 01:15:21,719
Speaker 1: swear to God, and um and there's like no one's arguing.

1387
01:15:22,000 --> 01:15:25,960
Speaker 1: But I was so I was so like, got to

1388
01:15:26,000 --> 01:15:28,280
Speaker 1: be in the background and just let everyone around me

1389
01:15:28,320 --> 01:15:31,120
Speaker 1: be funny. It was so nice, and it just really

1390
01:15:31,120 --> 01:15:33,120
Speaker 1: feels like I can just be proud not of my

1391
01:15:33,200 --> 01:15:36,400
Speaker 1: performance as much as like knowing that this was a

1392
01:15:36,400 --> 01:15:40,200
Speaker 1: good idea and casting this because in casting meaning just

1393
01:15:40,240 --> 01:15:43,360
Speaker 1: like oh putting you know these people in my life.

1394
01:15:43,479 --> 01:15:46,200
Speaker 1: Noah's gonna be on it. They filmed us doing our

1395
01:15:46,280 --> 01:15:50,320
Speaker 1: live podcast. You guys are gonna recognize everyone in this.

1396
01:15:50,400 --> 01:15:52,920
Speaker 1: You're gonna know all the stories because we were living

1397
01:15:52,960 --> 01:15:55,760
Speaker 1: this life while we were doing the podcast, and the

1398
01:15:55,760 --> 01:15:58,479
Speaker 1: podcast is gonna be all over it. So besties, I

1399
01:15:58,560 --> 01:16:01,040
Speaker 1: really need your support getting the word out and getting

1400
01:16:01,040 --> 01:16:03,000
Speaker 1: people on board. The first week, they're going to play

1401
01:16:03,040 --> 01:16:05,080
Speaker 1: the funk out of this all the time. On every

1402
01:16:05,120 --> 01:16:06,880
Speaker 1: single night, they're doing a marathon of the first two

1403
01:16:06,880 --> 01:16:09,200
Speaker 1: episodes back to back, so people just get which is

1404
01:16:09,600 --> 01:16:13,160
Speaker 1: the second. I'm wanna be surprised. I want to watch

1405
01:16:13,200 --> 01:16:15,760
Speaker 1: it on the night of UM but I want to.

1406
01:16:15,760 --> 01:16:17,720
Speaker 1: I would love for best to get together and do

1407
01:16:17,760 --> 01:16:20,599
Speaker 1: like a viewing party or just like get your friends involved,

1408
01:16:20,920 --> 01:16:23,920
Speaker 1: because I want this is the new Kardashian spot and

1409
01:16:23,960 --> 01:16:26,640
Speaker 1: it could be the new Kardashians for you to like,

1410
01:16:26,760 --> 01:16:29,519
Speaker 1: comment on and like, you know, just it's not going

1411
01:16:29,600 --> 01:16:32,240
Speaker 1: to be the same as Kardashians obviously, but it's it's

1412
01:16:32,280 --> 01:16:35,559
Speaker 1: just an extra layer of behind the scenes of my

1413
01:16:35,640 --> 01:16:39,960
Speaker 1: life that I think is not necessarily the most interesting life,

1414
01:16:39,960 --> 01:16:42,120
Speaker 1: but it is just an honest one. And I hope

1415
01:16:42,200 --> 01:16:44,639
Speaker 1: that you guys all like it and I like that,

1416
01:16:45,120 --> 01:16:50,800
Speaker 1: you know. Oh thanks man tagline. That's good. Thanks. All right,

1417
01:16:50,840 --> 01:17:00,360
Speaker 1: well we gotta go. Thank you now. Okay, Okay, guys, yeah,

1418
01:17:00,360 --> 01:17:02,600
Speaker 1: I got into a shirt. Uh, let's go. We'll be

1419
01:17:02,640 --> 01:17:04,680
Speaker 1: back here tomorrow. Don't worry about that. Next week. I'm

1420
01:17:04,680 --> 01:17:06,200
Speaker 1: gonna be in New York. Come see us this week

1421
01:17:06,200 --> 01:17:11,120
Speaker 1: in New Orleans. Uh. Fort lauder Jacksonville, Nashville Sunday, Nashville Sunday,

1422
01:17:11,160 --> 01:17:13,559
Speaker 1: Nashville Sunday. You guys, really, I want to sell the

1423
01:17:13,640 --> 01:17:16,559
Speaker 1: Riemann out. So and also, if you go alone and

1424
01:17:16,560 --> 01:17:19,000
Speaker 1: you write me going alone all in caps on my

1425
01:17:19,040 --> 01:17:20,679
Speaker 1: Instagram and give me your full name and what show

1426
01:17:20,680 --> 01:17:23,120
Speaker 1: you're going to, I will grant you a bump up

1427
01:17:23,160 --> 01:17:25,080
Speaker 1: to a free meet and great ticket, which is usually

1428
01:17:25,479 --> 01:17:28,439
Speaker 1: you know, fifty or so dollars more. I'll give you

1429
01:17:28,479 --> 01:17:31,320
Speaker 1: that for free. I love you guys so much. Don't

1430
01:17:31,320 --> 01:17:38,519
Speaker 1: be kill and what going? Oh Jacob Jack you