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Speaker 1: This week at the Parlor Live Comedy Club from Just

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Speaker 1: shoot Me Brian posting August twenty first through the twenty third.

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Speaker 1: Tickets are available at Parlor Live dot com or called

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Speaker 1: four two five, two eight nine seven thousand tent. Hey,

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Speaker 1: my oven's not working. What's what? My oven's not working? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I think you get the wrong number. No, I think

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Speaker 1: I have the right guy. Your name's Jack, right, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: you did construction on condos, right, Yeah, Okay, guy, I

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Speaker 1: got the right guy. And my oven doesn't work. Well,

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Speaker 1: I can't help you with that. Man, I don't have

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Speaker 1: anything to do with the appliances. I just did the hardwood,

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Speaker 1: So call somebody else. Yeah, but you don't understand I'm

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Speaker 1: having trouble setting the clock. Hello, Hey, how's it going. Well?

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Speaker 1: You were the guy that was talking about the oven alaa. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: And now I have an issue with my hardwood floors.

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Speaker 1: And I know that you're the guy to talk to

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Speaker 1: because you said that you do hardwood floors. I don't

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Speaker 1: know how to fix any of that stuff. Don't worry

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Speaker 1: about it. I just need to know how long it

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Speaker 1: took to put him in. It took me a couple

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Speaker 1: of hours to do every Commando in there, so the

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Speaker 1: two to three would be a good estimate. I just

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Speaker 1: said that. Okay, sweet, got it marked down in my note.

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Speaker 1: But thank you. See you, buddy. Are you seriously calling

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Speaker 1: me again? Yes? I just have one question. When you

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Speaker 1: said it was two to three hours to install the

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Speaker 1: hardwood floors, was it closer to two or three hours?

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Speaker 1: Why are you asking so many dumb questions? Well, it's

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Speaker 1: really not a dumb question, and I'll tell you why.

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Speaker 1: And I know that not everybody does this, But all

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Speaker 1: the things in my house I consider them my friends,

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Speaker 1: so I give them names. What the hardwood floors. I

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Speaker 1: call him Chester. He's gonna grow up someday, and I

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Speaker 1: want to tell him about his birth. You name your

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Speaker 1: hardwood floors. I name every thing in my house, Like

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Speaker 1: the refrigerator's name is Ronda and the oven's name is Georgia.

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Speaker 1: Jean Weird, Could you tell me how long exactly it

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Speaker 1: took you to put in those hardwood floors so I

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Speaker 1: can have that information to tell Chester when he grows up.

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Speaker 1: Are you joking right now? No? If I could just

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Speaker 1: get that information, i'd appreciate it. I need the whole

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Speaker 1: story for his baby book. And since you're the biological

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Speaker 1: father who installed the hardwood floors, you're the only person

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Speaker 1: that knows. I don't know what you're talking about. And

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna go and hang up and act like this

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Speaker 1: phone call. Oh sure, sure, you're a typical man and

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Speaker 1: you're not going to take care of your kids. Man,

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Speaker 1: you need to get it together. I'll meet some people,

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Speaker 1: make some friends. I stop talking to you. I have friends.

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Speaker 1: No you don't, man, that's not real. My microwave is

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Speaker 1: my friend. You need help, man, psychological help. My microwave

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Speaker 1: says you're a microwave is your friend, and yeah, says

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Speaker 1: you're a big is your microwave. No, it wasn't there

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Speaker 1: when I was there. I never met your microwave. My

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Speaker 1: microwave told me to tell you this is a prank

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Speaker 1: phone call. What my microwave told you? Tell me that

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Speaker 1: this is a break phone call. Yes, my microwave told

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Speaker 1: me to tell you that this is actually Jewbil from

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Speaker 1: brook and Jewil in the morning. I'm moving ninety two

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Speaker 1: point five doing a phone tap on you. No, are

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Speaker 1: you your brother? Alan set you up email us and

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Speaker 1: says he likes to mess with you all the time.

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Speaker 1: That sounds about all right. Man, he's been mess with

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Speaker 1: me since we were kids. Yeah, it's never gonna in.

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Speaker 1: Did you actually, at any point believe that somebody was

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Speaker 1: calling you who thought that their appliances and hardwood floors

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Speaker 1: were his friends. Dude, you never know. I deal with

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Speaker 1: the strangest people every morning with JEL phone taps weekday

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Speaker 1: mornings on the twenty six six Moving