Speaker 1: I Do, Part two is a one of a kind
Speaker 1: podcast that is all about dating, love, relationships, and what
Speaker 1: life is like after divorce and celebrities are just like
Speaker 1: us and not all over their relationships ending happily ever after,
Speaker 1: especially it seems right now a lot of them are divorced,
Speaker 1: are going through at this time of year. I'm one
Speaker 1: of your celebrity mentors, Bob Guiney. You know me from
Speaker 1: The Bachelor and The Today Show and my podcast Almost
Speaker 1: Famous to OG's and today we are joined by another
Speaker 1: celebrity mentor which I'm very excited to formally meet, you
Speaker 1: know her and love her on this podcast, also former
Speaker 1: Real Housewife of New York, Kelly ben Simone.
Speaker 2: Kelly, thank you so much for being here.
Speaker 3: Hi, Bob, how are you?
Speaker 2: I am great? How are you?
Speaker 3: I'm well? Happy? Post Thanksgiving? We had so much fun
Speaker 3: and then not so much fun.
Speaker 1: Oh oh okay, let's get into I was gonna say, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm still I'm still at my mom's house in Michigan,
Speaker 1: actually visiting with my mom today and you know, so,
Speaker 1: I'm I'm having some some technical challenges just getting that
Speaker 1: that dial up internet to work properly.
Speaker 2: But how how was your Thanksgiving Mine was pretty good.
Speaker 4: You know.
Speaker 3: It's funny.
Speaker 4: It's like, is you know, because we're both from from
Speaker 4: the Midwest, but you know, we do have the internet
Speaker 4: in the Midwest.
Speaker 2: Yes, we did.
Speaker 4: We did everything that we like don't have internet, we
Speaker 4: don't have cars.
Speaker 2: We even have whole foods. We've got it all out here, but.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we have Yeah, exactly exactly.
Speaker 1: I got like my mom's got like a hamstrung and
Speaker 1: we all just running to keep that dial up down
Speaker 1: for me. I'm totally kidding, of course, but yeah, getting
Speaker 1: hooked up here was not the easiest thing for me
Speaker 1: to do today.
Speaker 3: I'm that's so funny.
Speaker 4: Nobody was like it was like there was the friends giving,
Speaker 4: then the Thanksgiving, and it seemed like there was like
Speaker 4: a lot of un giving.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so it seems like we've.
Speaker 1: Got, yeah, a lot of stuff in the news obviously,
Speaker 1: But was that personal or was that was that more
Speaker 1: like a broader comment.
Speaker 3: It's just a broader comment.
Speaker 4: I just I just feel like there's just like so
Speaker 4: many whether it's reality stars, celebrities, you know, some people
Speaker 4: are trying to make it work and other people are
Speaker 4: just not making it work at all.
Speaker 3: Just we've just seen so much. You know, I thought
Speaker 3: it was going.
Speaker 4: To be a really positive like I'm feeling very positive,
Speaker 4: just going through therapy and working with you know, with
Speaker 4: the podcast Bob. It's been Honestly, it's been so incredibly
Speaker 4: cathartic for me. I just feel like a different person.
Speaker 4: Like people are like you look different, the way I
Speaker 4: sound is different. The way I am approaching everything is different.
Speaker 4: And so for me, I'm like the anomaly because everyone
Speaker 4: else is like breaking up.
Speaker 2: Well I do.
Speaker 1: I do feel like at the end of the year especially,
Speaker 1: I don't know why, but it seems like at the
Speaker 1: end of an election year for sure, But at the
Speaker 1: end of every year, you know, you start hearing about
Speaker 1: the uncoupling starting to happen amongst uh, you know.
Speaker 2: What does that uncoupling that I don't know.
Speaker 1: I just read an article yesterday with Gwyneth Paltrow and
Speaker 1: and maybe that's why that came to my mind.
Speaker 2: But yeah, you're hearing about the end of the year
Speaker 2: at a lot of people.
Speaker 1: Getting divorced, right, And I don't know if it's just
Speaker 1: that they've been quiet about it, you know, up until
Speaker 1: the end of the year, and they're like, Okay, hell
Speaker 1: with it, let's launch fresh and new into twenty twenty five.
Speaker 1: Or if it's really just come to a head because
Speaker 1: the stress of the holidays, you know what I mean.
Speaker 3: Does she just not like the D word and she
Speaker 3: likes the C word or what is that?
Speaker 2: I know, just see where that could be taken in
Speaker 2: so many different ways.
Speaker 3: I don't get that. I didn't get that. I was like,
Speaker 3: that's so odd.
Speaker 2: That's a very.
Speaker 3: Weird way of saying we're not together.
Speaker 1: But yeah, I think it's always interesting, you know, every
Speaker 1: year at the end of the year and then man,
Speaker 1: you know, I mean some some of the people that
Speaker 1: will that are in the news right now we both
Speaker 1: probably have met or am know and many of them
Speaker 1: obviously we all know from Afar. But the news is
Speaker 1: just really blowing up right now with people splitting up.
Speaker 2: And I will say this, you know, as a divorced man.
Speaker 1: I I did get divorced, or I should say, at
Speaker 1: least like formally separated around the holidays. I don't know
Speaker 1: if it was just because you're thinking, you know, or
Speaker 1: whoever asks for that moment is thinking, I don't want
Speaker 1: to have to go bananas.
Speaker 4: I'm buying a gift this year, you know, like they're like, oh,
Speaker 4: but don't repeat that, don't repeat that. Wait, so seriously,
Speaker 4: what so I have a couple of questions for you,
Speaker 4: but I would love to know more about that, like
Speaker 4: how did that happen?
Speaker 1: Well, when my ex and I split up, we were
Speaker 1: living on separate coasts for quite some time, so it
Speaker 1: was a it was kind of an organic thing.
Speaker 2: We have all just sort of grown apart. In fact,
Speaker 2: we're still very friendly and close. Like it's not it
Speaker 2: was never a bad thing.
Speaker 1: And I'm remarried with kids and she's remarried with kids,
Speaker 1: you know, so or with a child, So it was
Speaker 1: never like a talk thing. It was more like, just, uh,
Speaker 1: you know, are we gonna, you know, fake it for
Speaker 1: the families again this year?
Speaker 2: Or what are we doing?
Speaker 1: You know. I'm not saying that that was the actual conversation,
Speaker 1: but it was definitely one of those things.
Speaker 2: I think.
Speaker 1: I think there is a little bit to that, like
Speaker 1: you're rolling into the new year and you're kind of like, man,
Speaker 1: we're supposed to be, you know, kissing at midnight.
Speaker 4: Did you guys just feel like the distance was just
Speaker 4: too much? Did you feel like disconnected from the distance?
Speaker 1: What we were like, yeah, the disconnection was real, like
Speaker 1: it was. It was you know, it became a thing
Speaker 1: where you're living such separate lives. You know, the time,
Speaker 1: the time change. You know, it's one of those things.
Speaker 1: I think, the time change. It can be your friend
Speaker 1: in a lot of ways, but can also it can
Speaker 1: also create issues. You know, like you know, if if
Speaker 1: you're the one that's on the East coast and you know,
Speaker 1: you're you're trying to go to bed so you can
Speaker 1: get up for work in the morning, and the one
Speaker 1: on the West coast, you know, is out at the
Speaker 1: bar having a couple of cocktails and decides to call
Speaker 1: you at you know, eleven o'clock at night. That's two
Speaker 1: in the morning. You know, maybe that doesn't so happy.
Speaker 1: You're not making you so happy that that's the types
Speaker 1: of things.
Speaker 2: Who knows.
Speaker 1: I mean, I think there's a million things, but it's
Speaker 1: more just allowing life to get in the way.
Speaker 4: And then when you guys saw I'm sorry, I just
Speaker 4: curious because like there's a lot of people that do
Speaker 4: that really are into these, especially people that are on
Speaker 4: riot because there's like people say that like Ria is
Speaker 4: like the land of the Broken Toys, but there's a
Speaker 4: lot of people.
Speaker 2: That, you know, I've never been on a dating app.
Speaker 1: I do with the old fashion way and handout flowers
Speaker 1: on TV, so I don't understand this new fangled dating
Speaker 1: app thing.
Speaker 3: I hand out flowers on TV.
Speaker 4: Well, not everyone is like you, Bob, but no, my no,
Speaker 4: I'm curious because like a lot of these you know,
Speaker 4: people and that are on these dating apps are like
Speaker 4: I'm meeting these guys and all these different places. I'm like,
Speaker 4: that's great because if you travel somewhere, then the apps
Speaker 4: actually follow you and they're like, oh, you're in an
Speaker 4: airport in Chicago. There's four guys that are in Chicago,
Speaker 4: and people are meeting these people all over the place.
Speaker 4: And I was just curious as to like how you
Speaker 4: like obviously that they you know, being a part was
Speaker 4: was was difficult, but like when, for example, when you
Speaker 4: did get together, like you together every two weeks or
Speaker 4: I'm just I'm not I.
Speaker 1: Think that was like usually the longest time frame was
Speaker 1: that kind of a time frame.
Speaker 4: But I didn't take you guys a while to get
Speaker 4: back together once you like, you know, yeah.
Speaker 1: I think I think that's when you start to realize it,
Speaker 1: Like when it when you're young and dating, right, and
Speaker 1: it's like that's kind of stuff's exciting, right, It's like, oh,
Speaker 1: we're going to meet up in Chicago. You know, this
Speaker 1: is amazing. I'm I'm in la you know, she's in
Speaker 1: New York. This would be great.
Speaker 2: But when you're you know, when you're when you've been
Speaker 2: married for.
Speaker 1: Quite some time and you know, obviously that's when you
Speaker 1: start talking about everything from you know, the checkbook to
Speaker 1: you know, family, holidays and the real stresses of life start.
Speaker 2: To take their toll on people.
Speaker 1: I think when you reconnect it does take a little
Speaker 1: bit of you know, a bumping up session, like you
Speaker 1: got to actually almost kind of get back up to
Speaker 1: speed with one another because you have talked about a lot,
Speaker 1: probably a lot of superficial stuff. But you know, at
Speaker 1: least I think the relationships that can survive that stuff,
Speaker 1: that's great, you know, But I think that was the
Speaker 1: hardest part, probably both in the entertainment industry, both going
Speaker 1: a million miles an hour.
Speaker 2: Both I mean.
Speaker 1: Probably you know, error on the side of will being
Speaker 1: a little self absorbed because you had to be from
Speaker 1: the standpoint of you know, I can't miss the gym
Speaker 1: and I can't do this and I can't do that,
Speaker 1: so you know, I'll push my call back twenty minutes.
Speaker 2: It's okay, you know.
Speaker 1: So I think it's it's all the stuff that happens,
Speaker 1: you know, it just happens in life, especially when you're
Speaker 1: in your outward persona is probably as cultivated and has
Speaker 1: as important at those times than your real life inward persona.
Speaker 1: So you know, from that perspective, I probably stand guilty
Speaker 1: of that one too, you know. Probably you know, i'd
Speaker 1: be on the phone and someone will come up, Hey.
Speaker 2: Can we get a pictures?
Speaker 1: Oh? Yeah, sure, I'll call you right back, you know,
Speaker 1: as opposed to you know, no thanks, I'm in the
Speaker 1: middle of a very important phone call with someone I haven't.
Speaker 2: Seen in ten days.
Speaker 1: You know, I think I think there's some of that too,
Speaker 1: you know, you feel those pressures, and I don't know,
Speaker 1: I mean, who knows.
Speaker 2: I mean we're talking about you do you people?
Speaker 1: Well, I know I'm from the bottom rung of the ladder,
Speaker 1: but not like from the ben Affleck penthouse view, you know,
Speaker 1: and he's going through it right now, so who knows.
Speaker 4: Well, you know, it's like it's interesting because I put
Speaker 4: it like I'm not. I don't do in coupling, but
Speaker 4: I like to put names on things. I mean, I
Speaker 4: have children that are older, they're twenty four and twenty six,
Speaker 4: So I like to like categorize things. That's how I
Speaker 4: keep my life organized. And so I talk about like housekeeping,
Speaker 4: not like housekeeping like mopping the floor, but housekeeping is
Speaker 4: like the things.
Speaker 3: That we have to do.
Speaker 4: I talk about with but with you know, people that
Speaker 4: I'm dating, you know, my children, Like, here's the housekeeping.
Speaker 4: So it's like we've gotten, you know, certain things that
Speaker 4: we need to get off the list, and then you
Speaker 4: can go on and just kind of like get a
Speaker 4: coffee and walk around, you know, go to an exercise class,
Speaker 4: go to the movies.
Speaker 3: Or you know whatever.
Speaker 4: But I may get the work done first and then
Speaker 4: play after kind of personal.
Speaker 2: Well that's smart. I think that's really smart.
Speaker 1: I think, you know, that's probably a very mature way
Speaker 1: to look at it because I think, like the only
Speaker 1: housekeeping I was doing at that time, and I love
Speaker 1: the metaphor, so I'm running with it. I was sweeping
Speaker 1: things under the rug, right if I was housekeeping, it
Speaker 1: was like, ah, you know, well, I'm not gonna.
Speaker 2: Let that piss me off to much. I'm just gonna
Speaker 2: sleep the under the dragon. But we didn't have kids.
Speaker 1: We didn't have children together, so I didn't have kids
Speaker 1: until after I met my wife. Now, so I think
Speaker 1: with kids comes a totally different mindset, and you know,
Speaker 1: you know that of course from your experiences, and it's like,
Speaker 1: you know, you have children with someone and it becomes
Speaker 1: all consuming, right, I mean, my wife and I go
Speaker 1: through it now every day.
Speaker 2: It's like I don't remember the last time. Well, actually
Speaker 2: I shouldn't say that.
Speaker 1: This weekend we made a point of talking about stuff
Speaker 1: that didn't have to do with the kids, which I
Speaker 1: loved because it was like, you know, under the you know,
Speaker 1: my son's birthday was this weekend, and everything's about the kids.
Speaker 3: And thank you.
Speaker 2: Yes, he's just friends six.
Speaker 1: So I'm fifty three and I've got an now six
Speaker 1: year old and a three year old and I didn't
Speaker 1: start until later in life with my kids, and I mean,
Speaker 1: it's it's definitely a different set of challenges at this age.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I raised my kids on my own, so I
Speaker 4: didn't really have the dynamic of like, you know, what
Speaker 4: are his thoughts because there were only my thoughts.
Speaker 1: Which is instant because you guys were still were you
Speaker 1: still together during during all the first I'm sure the
Speaker 1: first several years, right.
Speaker 4: And then the first several years, but he was traveling
Speaker 4: a lot, so he was gone all the time, and
Speaker 4: it was just basically me and my parents raising my
Speaker 4: two girls. Yeah, and so I never really had that,
Speaker 4: but I mean I do know that from you know,
Speaker 4: when you're when I'm because I've been single for so
Speaker 4: long that when I do meet guys that, you know,
Speaker 4: my narrative is not about my kids with them because
Speaker 4: they're not a part of my children's lives, right, So
Speaker 4: that like is kind of is kind of good.
Speaker 3: But then I realized.
Speaker 4: That there is this like weird separate life. So it's
Speaker 4: kind of like I'm cheating on my kids. I'm cheating
Speaker 4: him because my life with him is totally different from
Speaker 4: my life with my children before you know, they before
Speaker 4: they become friends.
Speaker 1: So it's just you know, doating that early, right, I
Speaker 1: mean even though kids are older.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're pumping the brakes on all that stuff, right,
Speaker 2: I mean.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I try to keep it.
Speaker 4: I try to keep it as as you know, my
Speaker 4: kids are always like we want to meet them. We
Speaker 4: want to see who's this person. Yeah there's you know,
Speaker 4: you've been going on a couple of days to want
Speaker 4: to know the person is. And I mean, I think
Speaker 4: just because they're like literally hawks, they're like these people,
Speaker 4: what are they doing?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 3: What are their intentions?
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 3: They're very protective of me, which is very sweet.
Speaker 2: Are you dating right now?
Speaker 1: Are you dating someone specific right now as you go
Speaker 1: into the holiday season, or were you kind of like
Speaker 1: not gonna buy anybody any special gifts this holiday season.
Speaker 2: I'll wait till the new year.
Speaker 4: I love it's all about gifts. By the way, that's
Speaker 4: my love language is gift giving. So like you're like,
Speaker 4: I love to give gifts, and I'm not like, oh
Speaker 4: my god, like if I give you something, I have
Speaker 4: to give you something back.
Speaker 3: I just love to give gifts. But I am like
Speaker 3: I've been dating.
Speaker 1: I honestly, I don't even like I almost get uncomfortable
Speaker 1: receiving gifts. I like giving stuff, but I like you
Speaker 1: because if I want something, I just go get it right.
Speaker 2: And I'm the hardest person to buy for.
Speaker 1: And everybody tells me they're like, well, yeah, I mean
Speaker 1: everything everything we think to get for you you will
Speaker 1: go get yourself, which is true, and so I really
Speaker 1: enjoy it. I'm like, I'm like you in that regard.
Speaker 1: I wonder if that's my love language. I've never done
Speaker 1: the love language thing. I need to find that I
Speaker 1: should do it.
Speaker 3: You know that.
Speaker 4: And also to know, like what kind of personality type
Speaker 4: you want. I just did that the other day because
Speaker 4: my youngest daughter was like, Mommy, you need to find
Speaker 4: out what kind of personality you have.
Speaker 3: I'm like, I know what kind of personality I have.
Speaker 2: Dial everybody else.
Speaker 4: Everybody knows what kind of personality I have. You were
Speaker 4: asked about you know what I was doing lately in terms.
Speaker 3: Of my dating life.
Speaker 4: Yes, And you know I have gone on many dates
Speaker 4: and I've met some very very very great, some really
Speaker 4: great guys. And I did this her size where I
Speaker 4: wrote a love letter to my future husband and I wrote,
Speaker 4: you know, wrote down and I manifested what he looks like,
Speaker 4: who I'm going to be to him, what I'm not
Speaker 4: going to do, what I hope for that will happen
Speaker 4: for us. And it just really changed when you articulate
Speaker 4: the things that you really want versus just like thinking
Speaker 4: them in your head. If you write them down, if
Speaker 4: you tell a friend, if you you know, like I
Speaker 4: was talking to Cheryl Burke about it, you know, if
Speaker 4: you're talking about.
Speaker 2: I talk to her in years.
Speaker 3: She's amazing, She's talk about a mindful human.
Speaker 2: Oh cow, She's always been so sweet.
Speaker 3: Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful human.
Speaker 4: I've met so many great women and men, and I
Speaker 4: just it's been it's been a really interesting journey for me,
Speaker 4: just because you know, you come from the Bachelor. I
Speaker 4: come from Housewives, and you know, the Bachelor is more about,
Speaker 4: you know, loving and relationships and getting to know people.
Speaker 4: Housewives is about like how can I destroy you the quickest?
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know what I have to tell you. So
Speaker 1: my wife loves the Housewives. And I would always act
Speaker 1: like I wasn't watching right, and so you watching, I'm like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, you're watching this again, Like what do
Speaker 1: you get out of watching people argue like this? And
Speaker 1: then I'd be walking out of the room on it
Speaker 1: and I'd be like, wait a minute, what did Darrendad
Speaker 1: just say? Like I would literally like I was getting
Speaker 1: into osmosis and I was so into it without even
Speaker 1: realizing I was into it that Oh my god, it
Speaker 1: was driving me crazy. But but yeah, I've always you know,
Speaker 1: and I and I remember when you were just you.
Speaker 2: Just came back on the show last year for a
Speaker 2: couple episodes.
Speaker 3: For Ultimate Girl's Trip.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and that was. I read a thing just a
Speaker 2: minute ago.
Speaker 1: It was called sun Sand and Psychosis, Carrie Island.
Speaker 2: Scary Island. It's so funny.
Speaker 1: How was that experience to go on something like Scary
Speaker 1: Island and know that, okay, buzz are off. I'm sure
Speaker 1: you know we're just gonna we're gonna buckle down, and
Speaker 1: it's gonna be someone's gonna drink too much. You know,
Speaker 1: someone's gonna you know whatever. I mean, when you go
Speaker 1: into that thing, how do you mentally prepare? I mean
Speaker 1: I would go to therapy for months just to get
Speaker 1: ready to go.
Speaker 4: So before I went on Scary Island, I went to
Speaker 4: Scary Island. I got extensions, so I was feeling gorgeous.
Speaker 1: Yes, I'm gonna say, you gotta go in your best
Speaker 1: like your best friend of mind the whole way around.
Speaker 3: I did.
Speaker 4: I got I literally, my the my hair does. Who's amazing.
Speaker 4: He was like, you know what, He's like, We're gonna
Speaker 4: give you the best hair. So whatever happens, you're just
Speaker 4: gonna be like feeling so good doesn't matter. So I
Speaker 4: got my I had to put these had these extension
Speaker 4: put in my hair, and I just it's like, you know,
Speaker 4: when like something happens, like I don't know, you get
Speaker 4: a haircut or whatever. I just felt so good. I
Speaker 4: felt so like good about myself. And I think that
Speaker 4: my good feeling because I wasn't like nervous or I
Speaker 4: wasn't upset or anything, and because I came for I
Speaker 4: was coming from like a powerful place. I think the
Speaker 4: other women got really really freaked out.
Speaker 1: You know, those shows are so geared towards camera time, right,
Speaker 1: like if you're creating drama, you're getting your own camera
Speaker 1: more or you're asked back to do other things or whatever.
Speaker 2: But that's never been your thing. You've never been the
Speaker 2: drama girl, you know.
Speaker 4: So I think, no, I'm never the drama girl. But
Speaker 4: people love to meet, they love they when they see me.
Speaker 4: They're like, Okay, we're just gonna go after her. This
Speaker 4: is an easy target. I'm like, I'm tall, I'm like
Speaker 4: big bird. I'm like, it's fine, just go after me.
Speaker 3: You know.
Speaker 2: So my wife did ask me one question. She wanted
Speaker 2: me to ask you my wife.
Speaker 1: My wife's name is Jessica, but I call her Canyon,
Speaker 1: which is her maiden name, so she's always just been
Speaker 1: Canyon to me. So Kanyon was like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: you got to ask Kelly if she really thought beth
Speaker 1: Any poisoned in their dinner.
Speaker 2: I said, I'll ask her.
Speaker 3: So that's.
Speaker 4: No. What happened was we were supposed to be she
Speaker 4: was supposed to be cooking dinner and she was getting
Speaker 4: her hair blown out, and then the chef, he like,
Speaker 4: got so upset because she was screaming and yelling at
Speaker 4: him because he was making the dinner for us, and
Speaker 4: he hurt his finger. He had to go to the hospital,
Speaker 4: and the chef was like, I was like, is everything
Speaker 4: okay in here? You guys are cool. I love the
Speaker 4: behind the scenes. They make me like laugh. I get
Speaker 4: in trouble, but I mean.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, I love I always get in trouble, though.
Speaker 2: I can't think of any.
Speaker 1: Show I've ever done where I haven't gotten in trouble
Speaker 1: because I have a tough time taking it seriously and
Speaker 1: I know I'm supposed to, but it's like when you're
Speaker 1: in the moment and you really do know what's going on.
Speaker 2: You get the giggles.
Speaker 1: You can't help yourself, you know, and it's like, you know,
Speaker 1: if you're not giggling, it's kind of your own damn fault,
Speaker 1: Like why would you be here if you can't have fun?
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 4: I just I just love the fact that where we
Speaker 4: are today is that we're able to talk honestly. I mean,
Speaker 4: for me to talk to a male honestly about your
Speaker 4: feelings and like uncoupling. During the uncoupling here I said
Speaker 4: that word. Don't have to figure out a new word.
Speaker 4: I mean, like I need to like figure out a
Speaker 4: new word, but to be able to like, to be
Speaker 4: able to you know, especially, I think what's I think
Speaker 4: what I admire about it is that you did it
Speaker 4: during the holidays. But also what I don't like about
Speaker 4: it is that you did during the holidays, because I
Speaker 4: think what people are what people are talking about, is
Speaker 4: that their feelings. But it's more it's like your mother
Speaker 4: may be invested, your brother may be invested, you know,
Speaker 4: your your family may be like we really like that person,
Speaker 4: or maybe they don't really like that person, and so
Speaker 4: it's just like it's just more than just two people.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's never like all need the two.
Speaker 4: I agree, And I think that during the holidays it's
Speaker 4: so hard. I mean, first of all, you go home
Speaker 4: to the holidays and you know, someone's like, your hair
Speaker 4: is too short, you got oh did you gain weight?
Speaker 3: Oh, you're too skinny. You do this da da da dah.
Speaker 4: Or just like the pressure of you know, doing well
Speaker 4: and creating a life for yourself during the holidays is
Speaker 4: like literally under a microscope, coupled with the fact that
Speaker 4: maybe your feelings are a little wild because you're not
Speaker 4: feeling the vibe of your you know, your wife or
Speaker 4: your husband being far away, or you're you know, you've
Speaker 4: you've had some issues with cheating or whatever it is,
Speaker 4: or it's just it's under a microscope and it just
Speaker 4: gets really really and then like the turkey does is dry?
Speaker 2: That just triggers you. It's no, yeah, it's so true. No,
Speaker 2: I'm really gonna like lose it.
Speaker 4: What else could possibly go wrong with stuffing our relationships over?
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, it's so funny.
Speaker 1: I think I think people do though you have these
Speaker 1: heightened expectations, but yeah, right, I mean then you factor
Speaker 1: in the family component and you know, that's like I
Speaker 1: always you know, the cool thing that that I kind
Speaker 1: of got to experience, at least through my ex wife
Speaker 1: and my split, which was again many years ago now,
Speaker 1: but was that I still really enjoyed our family, you know,
Speaker 1: and I still do keep in touch with so many
Speaker 1: of them, and so it was like and it was
Speaker 1: never that kind of throw the baby out with the
Speaker 1: bathwater type of situation. Pardon the expression, but you know
Speaker 1: it's it wasn't like and that's it fine line in.
Speaker 2: The sand, you know. For me, I'm like, no, this
Speaker 2: isn't their fault. This is our fault.
Speaker 1: Like I love them and they're good people and they
Speaker 1: love me, So we're going to remain in touch with
Speaker 1: one another and we all still like each other. It
Speaker 1: wasn't like, you know, it was it was actually a
Speaker 1: nice I don't know, it was it was the right
Speaker 1: thing to do to not stay married and and and
Speaker 1: at that time, I guess, and but it was also
Speaker 1: like we saw it for what it was, what it was,
Speaker 1: and we saw the bigger picture, and we were like,
Speaker 1: we don't have to be at each other's throats about
Speaker 1: stuff we've never met each other's throats about, like, you know.
Speaker 3: So that's super interesting because.
Speaker 4: You know, like with when we're talking about like exes
Speaker 4: and things like that, Like I recently called off a
Speaker 4: wedding and I loved my ex's mother. She was just
Speaker 4: a She is a beautiful, beautiful, mindful, smart, sassy, creative,
Speaker 4: incredible woman. And I I literally wrote her a text
Speaker 4: like a month ago and I was just just like,
Speaker 4: I just miss you. Hope you're well, because I do.
Speaker 4: I just love her so much. So I feel badly
Speaker 4: about that. But what about Ben Jen? And Jen like,
Speaker 4: I mean, he's like I liked you, but then I
Speaker 4: like you, but then you're my like first, like like
Speaker 4: what are your thoughts on that?
Speaker 2: You know?
Speaker 1: So I always I use the term don't be ben
Speaker 1: Affleck a lot in life, and I will tell you
Speaker 1: why not because not because.
Speaker 2: It's a flack.
Speaker 4: It's afflect, I know, but I think of like I afflect.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I got a flac. I always like, I always
Speaker 2: think of it.
Speaker 1: And it's funny because I've only met Ben once and
Speaker 1: he was very nice to me hosting a charity event. Uh,
Speaker 1: but in my life I always think like guys go
Speaker 1: on the Bachelor and hand out a few flowers and
Speaker 1: next thing. You know, they think they're Ben Affleck, and
Speaker 1: I was like, no, you're not Ben Affleck. You're dude
Speaker 1: to hand it out flowers on a TV show. Move on, right,
Speaker 1: And so I go back to your life if other
Speaker 1: things come up, as but don't be the dude who's
Speaker 1: just you know, planning himself there waiting for a lead
Speaker 1: in a new movie.
Speaker 2: You didn't write any movies, you're not doing movies, you know, whatever.
Speaker 1: And so when all this stuff started coming up, you know,
Speaker 1: first of all, I love Jennifer Garner. You know, when
Speaker 1: Ben and jen Jennifer Lopez were together the first time
Speaker 1: and then they split up and ends up with Jennifer Garner.
Speaker 1: I'm like, this dude, like, honestly, he's just like crushing
Speaker 1: it in the game of life, right, he gets Jennifer
Speaker 1: Lopez and Jennifer Garner. How amazing, and then you know,
Speaker 1: messes that up somehow and ends up going back to
Speaker 1: Jennifer Lopez, which I'm like, Okay, I could see this
Speaker 1: whole thing transition and making sense, and then they kind
Speaker 1: of liked it.
Speaker 4: I don't know if they gave me like a warm,
Speaker 4: fuzzy feeling. I was like, they're cute together.
Speaker 3: Well, I don't clearly they clearly love each other so much.
Speaker 1: Yes, but I think you know, I think Ben and
Speaker 1: part of me is like, man, he's he's going to
Speaker 1: get himself right. You know you mentioned mentioned therapy and
Speaker 1: different things like that. Like, man, I love therapy. I
Speaker 1: haven't gone in a while. Probably could use some some
Speaker 1: buffer sessions for sure.
Speaker 4: But I always think and it's changed so much. I mean,
Speaker 4: it's changed. It's so different. Therapy today is so different
Speaker 4: than it's amazing, it's amazing.
Speaker 2: I agree with you. I agree with you.
Speaker 4: He needs to like clean himself up and he can't
Speaker 4: believe and shame other people.
Speaker 1: No way, and stay out of stay out of anybody
Speaker 1: else's life for a little while, work on yourself.
Speaker 4: But what I think is interesting is that he loved
Speaker 4: Jennifer Garner, but he's in love with j Low And
Speaker 4: I think that that's like a difference.
Speaker 3: Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 4: Like I do you can I think he has I
Speaker 4: think he has familial love for Jennifer Garner, that's my opinion.
Speaker 4: But I think he has like he's in love. I mean,
Speaker 4: you can see even like whatever the photos even though
Speaker 4: they're like who knows if they were planted or not whatever,
Speaker 4: but you can and see them together the way that
Speaker 4: you know, like the way that they touch, you know,
Speaker 4: they're touching each other. There is a real like he's
Speaker 4: very they're both very much in love. Yeah, even though
Speaker 4: they can't.
Speaker 2: Be I think so.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's it's got to be one of those
Speaker 1: things that it's just like, you know, as much as
Speaker 1: you guys love each other, you can't make it work.
Speaker 1: And it's such a bummer because I don't know these people,
Speaker 1: but I want them to be happy so bad.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 1: It's like I'm my I'm sitting there going come on
Speaker 1: you guys, you know, and it's like, you know, I
Speaker 1: don't know. It's it's a bummer. I mean, but sometimes
Speaker 1: you know, you can have people in your life that
Speaker 1: maybe you once had a different relationship with, but that
Speaker 1: you guys can keep it together. I mean, I mean
Speaker 1: for Jennifer Garner and Ben, obviously they got the kids,
Speaker 1: so that's important. But with j Lo, I mean it
Speaker 1: looks like Ben is really you know, ensconced in that
Speaker 1: whole thing too.
Speaker 2: So yeah, I hope they make it work.
Speaker 1: I realized in some of the articles I was reading recently,
Speaker 1: I saw Leah Remenie was going through divorce and they've
Speaker 1: been really good friends for a long time, and and
Speaker 1: she was mare for twenty one years.
Speaker 2: I mean, that's a lot of time. That's a long time.
Speaker 1: Part of me is sometimes like when you hear about
Speaker 1: someone who's been married that long, come on, guys, can't
Speaker 1: you figure it out? But then you wonder, is it
Speaker 1: been broken for a long time and they just kept
Speaker 1: together for the kids.
Speaker 2: Who knows right?
Speaker 3: Right? Did you ever meet Rachel I've known Rachel Zo
Speaker 3: for a long time. Do you ever meet her?
Speaker 2: I met her back in the day a few times
Speaker 2: and thought.
Speaker 3: She was really nice, beautiful human.
Speaker 4: Yeah, she beautiful human, beautiful family, amazing upbringing. Really both
Speaker 4: of them are just such lovely people. I was, I
Speaker 4: honestly was shocked, and I sent her a text and
Speaker 4: I was like because I hadn't seen her in a while,
Speaker 4: and I was like, I just want to let you
Speaker 4: know that I love you. Whatever you are doing, I
Speaker 4: just love you. And I felt, really, you know, there
Speaker 4: are certain things. There's certain things that I read about
Speaker 4: or hear about from people that I've known in my
Speaker 4: past life because we used to work together when I
Speaker 4: was when I was when I was an editor of
Speaker 4: Hampton's magazine back in the ice age.
Speaker 3: Wow, she was one of my stylists.
Speaker 2: That's so cool.
Speaker 4: She is just so beautiful. And I just felt I
Speaker 4: just felt awful. I really did. I was just like,
Speaker 4: oh my god, Like you don't you know, like you said, like,
Speaker 4: and maybe this is our maybe this is our Midwestern roots, Bob,
Speaker 4: like we just want the best for people.
Speaker 1: And yeah, no, I genuinely do. And I and like
Speaker 1: I said, I mean I don't know Rachel.
Speaker 2: Well, obviously you do.
Speaker 1: But the times I can only think of my encounters
Speaker 1: with people, and that's that's the thing I have, you know,
Speaker 1: that I carry with me. And she was always so
Speaker 1: lovely and just seems so too, like spiritually centered and
Speaker 1: grounded and kind. And you know, it's one of those
Speaker 1: things where you see someone blowing up with all this
Speaker 1: success and you're like, then when you run it, run
Speaker 1: across them and they and they seem like the exact
Speaker 1: same person you remember from two years previous, and you're like,
Speaker 1: I love that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, to me, there's there's the opposite.
Speaker 4: They blow up with success and then they're like wildly
Speaker 4: so it's fine.
Speaker 2: We've seen that too. Yeah, we've seen that.
Speaker 4: Wait, what do you think about all these families that
Speaker 4: are having Thanksgiving together as couples but they're not together?
Speaker 2: I kind of like it. I mean, you know, like.
Speaker 4: One child is one place and the other child is
Speaker 4: somewhere else, like.
Speaker 2: Se That's the thing I always think about that.
Speaker 1: This like when a couple has has a kid or
Speaker 1: two let's say, or whatever, and they split up, right,
Speaker 1: and and let's say it's one child whatever reason.
Speaker 2: In my mind, it's always one child.
Speaker 1: So a couple has one child, then they split up,
Speaker 1: and now this this, this person that's part of that
Speaker 1: relationship now has children with their new.
Speaker 2: Partner or their new spouse, right, and.
Speaker 1: Now they're having this big family picnic and where's the
Speaker 1: where's the other kid?
Speaker 2: You know?
Speaker 3: And it's like, this is what happened to her?
Speaker 2: I actually know these parties a little bit too.
Speaker 3: Okay, all right, so let's hear the intel.
Speaker 2: Okay, so I shouldn't say I know them necessarily well, but.
Speaker 3: You're like, I don't know them, know them.
Speaker 1: I don't know them, know them, but it's a terrek.
Speaker 1: I've known him. I've known Josh who became Christina's new
Speaker 1: husband who she's splitting off of because my ex co
Speaker 1: host and I U from we had to show on
Speaker 1: Serious XM for many years. That's her brother and seems
Speaker 1: like a nice enough guy to me. Yeah, So to
Speaker 1: see what they're going through right.
Speaker 2: Now, and I'm just like, wow, this is bananas.
Speaker 1: But yeah, I want to hear your take on it,
Speaker 1: because you know, again, I mean I want to think
Speaker 1: the best of everyone, and I hope that they're going
Speaker 1: to make it all work. But it's like, you know,
Speaker 1: you start seeing who's control in the narrative is at
Speaker 1: different times, and then you're like, oh my gosh, and
Speaker 1: then I get like I don't want to go down
Speaker 1: the in the rabbit hole with it. So I'm just
Speaker 1: like I'm gonna try and stay here, you know, and
Speaker 1: and just hold everyone at an equal place in my
Speaker 1: mind in my heart. But you know, I don't know, Yeah,
Speaker 1: i'd be interested to hear what your take is.
Speaker 4: On So for a lot of these children, and like
Speaker 4: a lot of my daughter's kids, you know, they were
Speaker 4: always like, well, they're asking what we're doing for Thanksgiving?
Speaker 4: Can so and so come and so? We would you know,
Speaker 4: I would be like, if you want to bring you know,
Speaker 4: whoever you want, wherever you want, You're welcome to do that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And I didn't think of it as.
Speaker 4: Strange, except for afterwards parents would say like, oh, so
Speaker 4: and so came here and this one came there, and
Speaker 4: it just seemed to be very, very complicated, right, And
Speaker 4: so on the one hand, I think any time that
Speaker 4: there's an opportunity to create a family environment for a child,
Speaker 4: whether that's theirs or another person's, I think that's a
Speaker 4: value add for the child. But then on the other hand,
Speaker 4: it's like when the child is not it was away
Speaker 4: from their family, they're creating memories with other families, and
Speaker 4: so it's always this like disconnect between what's my life
Speaker 4: look like versus someone else's.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and so, you.
Speaker 4: Know, I was always very mindful of that when people
Speaker 4: would say like, oh, you know, you're gonna take my
Speaker 4: daughter my you know, away for the weekend, and I
Speaker 4: would always you know, say like, make sure you call
Speaker 4: into your mom, and your mom is so great. And
Speaker 4: even you know, men that I have dated that have
Speaker 4: children saying the same thing, like, your mom is so great.
Speaker 3: I'm sure she misses you so much.
Speaker 4: Don't forget to tell her how much you love her, like,
Speaker 4: you know, just so that they're not like, oh no,
Speaker 4: I'm gonna be Kelly's gonna be my new mom.
Speaker 1: Right well, I think that's empathetic though, That's like, that's
Speaker 1: you showing empathy, which I think is really a kind.
Speaker 2: Trait to have.
Speaker 3: I appreciate that.
Speaker 1: When you have someone like I would, I'm always mindful
Speaker 1: of how it's going to make someone else feel to
Speaker 1: a fault. Sometimes, like my wife even say like, you're
Speaker 1: probably creating this in your head, and I'm like, well,
Speaker 1: I'm just thinking about how it would make me feel.
Speaker 1: You know, like if if I get a Christmas card
Speaker 1: that has a picture everyone else in the family on
Speaker 1: it but me, my feelings will be hurt. And so
Speaker 1: in my mind it might be like, well, you weren't
Speaker 1: there the day we took the picture, and okay, I
Speaker 1: guess that makes sense, you know. But and on the
Speaker 1: other side of it, I'm like, well, then use a
Speaker 1: different picture, you know.
Speaker 2: Or whatever. Yeah, but you know, or I don't know.
Speaker 1: Just I just put one of the kids or whatever.
Speaker 1: So I always think about that kind of stuff, and
Speaker 1: I think that's what you're doing right there.
Speaker 2: Is as being just very empathetic. Right.
Speaker 1: You don't want the mom who's not with their child
Speaker 1: to feel like, you know, you're trying to swoop in
Speaker 1: there and take over, because that's that's a mom fear,
Speaker 1: it's a dad fear.
Speaker 2: You know, I would love that.
Speaker 1: But you know, at the same time, you're you're kind
Speaker 1: of looking at it from the standpoint of, all, right,
Speaker 1: if I make sure that she calls and you know,
Speaker 1: she understands I'm not a threat here, then maybe we
Speaker 1: can get along, right, and maybe we can have a
Speaker 1: nice relationship too. That's kind of how I would go
Speaker 1: about it too, I think.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean, I think that children are just so malleable,
Speaker 4: and they just they want they want to please so much,
Speaker 4: and they'll just you know, they'll go anywhere and do anything.
Speaker 4: But the good news about the Christmas card or the
Speaker 4: holiday card, whatever it is, doesn't doesn't That whole scenario
Speaker 4: is never going to happen anymore because now we can
Speaker 4: just like pop the faces.
Speaker 2: I know, that's right.
Speaker 3: Oh there I am.
Speaker 2: I'm like super imposed in the background like a balloon head. Yeah.
Speaker 2: But okay, So what.
Speaker 1: Christina Hack had going on here was it looked like
Speaker 1: she took one of the kids on a trip while
Speaker 1: the others were with with with Trek and his wife. So,
Speaker 1: I mean, I've heard people doing that before, right, Like,
Speaker 1: maybe I know I can't be there for the holidays,
Speaker 1: maybe the oldest one gets to come with me on
Speaker 1: this trip or something, or the youngest one because she
Speaker 1: never gets to.
Speaker 2: Go or something.
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't obviously know the details, but that
Speaker 1: doesn't strike me as that crazy. I think people are
Speaker 1: so quick to kind of have an opinion about it
Speaker 1: that they want to be like, hey, that's that's really weird.
Speaker 2: Why would you you know, just what your favorite one
Speaker 2: or something.
Speaker 1: It's like, no, I'm just you know, I'm gonna try
Speaker 1: and take each one of them on a one on
Speaker 1: one trip. And it worked out that this timing was
Speaker 1: this time of year, I guess. But waiting to this
Speaker 1: stage in the game to have children, you know. Like
Speaker 1: I said to my wife, I'm like, man, I if
Speaker 1: I piss you off and drive your care tough because
Speaker 1: I'm not going anywhere. I Am not just going to
Speaker 1: be the dad on the weekends. So you're stuck with me,
Speaker 1: So get used to it. I vacuum a lot. I
Speaker 1: don't you know. I don't cook as much as I should,
Speaker 1: but I keep the house clean. I love doing laundry.
Speaker 1: These are things that I you know, I see as
Speaker 1: plus is probably drys are a little crazy.
Speaker 2: But I'm like, you know, I'm not gonna be a dad.
Speaker 1: On the weekends. My boys. I have two little boys,
Speaker 1: and you know, I'm here. I'm going to be there
Speaker 1: every single day. So you know, if something God forbid
Speaker 1: were to happen to us, it's like, well tough, I'm there.
Speaker 2: Every day to wear that.
Speaker 3: But that's such a luxury.
Speaker 4: That's such a luxury because's a lot of working dads,
Speaker 4: you know, it's like working moms. I mean, you know,
Speaker 4: I mean I know even from myself that like we're
Speaker 4: you know, I work at a lot of different arenas,
Speaker 4: and you know, sometimes I'm like, I don't have a
Speaker 4: lot of time for my kids, and I you know,
Speaker 4: I was raising them on my own.
Speaker 3: I always felt so guilty.
Speaker 4: I'd be like, Okay, let's just go to Soul Cycle
Speaker 4: and then we're going to go for lunch and then
Speaker 4: we're going to go shopping, because that'll make them happy
Speaker 4: and then they'll they'll feel good about themselves. And we'll
Speaker 4: you know, talk along the way, or you know, my
Speaker 4: youngest daughter will get in trouble, so I'll walk her
Speaker 4: home from school, you know, which was like four miles
Speaker 4: and we'll talk through things because I had because I
Speaker 4: could had time to do that with her that day.
Speaker 4: And so I would try to put in my time
Speaker 4: and effort with them in ways that I were like
Speaker 4: really proactive.
Speaker 3: I didn't have the you know, I didn't.
Speaker 4: I couldn't be there all the time because I was
Speaker 4: you know, it's like my work life doesn't allow that.
Speaker 1: Were you mindful to make that one on one time
Speaker 1: with each of the girls or was it always collective?
Speaker 2: Like how was that?
Speaker 3: So that's a good question too, Like I would try
Speaker 3: to be with you know, try to be with them
Speaker 3: like a family unit. I would always say, like we're
Speaker 3: a unit.
Speaker 4: We have rules, Like I would always talk about like
Speaker 4: the things that we do together, just to create just
Speaker 4: a unit that they could take with them. And you know,
Speaker 4: it's interesting, I mean, like the biggest compliment when you're
Speaker 4: when your kids get old, older like mine are, and
Speaker 4: they like reiterate what you say.
Speaker 3: I'm like, I'm sorry, what did you say?
Speaker 2: Did I said that?
Speaker 3: Did you just say it not the right tool for
Speaker 3: the right job. I'm like, that's that's so good, That's
Speaker 3: what I say.
Speaker 1: Anyway, doing that, like my six year old is already
Speaker 1: mimicking me, and not always by the way, So yeah, okay.
Speaker 3: What about Britney cart right?
Speaker 4: I love First of all, I'm like, I'm like, what
Speaker 4: is going on with and I'm obsessed with these kids.
Speaker 3: I love that. I know, man, so it's young adults.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but this especially, you know, once the whole kind
Speaker 1: of the roof went off with Scandabal, all of a sudden,
Speaker 1: it was like, you know, I mean, everybody started paying
Speaker 1: attention again.
Speaker 2: Not that they hadn't been.
Speaker 4: That was a provo when he was I was a
Speaker 4: provo con Oh you were God, yes, And he was
Speaker 4: like walking around.
Speaker 3: With his like food by himself, like very like in
Speaker 3: his own moment.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 4: I was like, I mean, I love that show. I
Speaker 4: love Lisavanda Pomp, I love I love I love all
Speaker 4: the characters. I love the restaurants. I love Lisa Vanda Pomp,
Speaker 4: I love all the characters. I think everyone is like Sacy.
Speaker 3: I love her. She's just like very she really like
Speaker 3: gets herself And now all.
Speaker 1: Of a sudden, they're gonna do the reboot right with
Speaker 1: with with a whole new cast apparently, and I'm like,
Speaker 1: I wonder how that's gonna go, because man, I you know,
Speaker 1: I've known Jack's for a long time, and so I
Speaker 1: like to now have him going through all this stuff.
Speaker 1: You're Brittany going through all this stuff. I'm like, gosh,
Speaker 1: do I reach out, like, what is the right thing here?
Speaker 2: You know?
Speaker 3: I want to basically, what's what is the tea? What's
Speaker 3: tell me? Like, spill it?
Speaker 2: I don't know, you know, I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't know, because I again, I'm trying so desperately
Speaker 1: to stay keeping everybody right here, you know what I mean?
Speaker 3: Yeah, Okay, you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, So Brittany, basically, from what I can tell, Brittany's
Speaker 1: admitted to hooking up with one of Jacks's friends since
Speaker 1: they decided to divorce, And so part of me is
Speaker 1: kind of like, how good of friends are we talking here?
Speaker 1: Is this a friend or is this, you know, one
Speaker 1: of his boys, which I highly doubt, but it could
Speaker 1: be an acquaintance who you know.
Speaker 2: Or whatever.
Speaker 4: I mean.
Speaker 1: I guess there's a million different things to look at here,
Speaker 1: but it's like, you know, their reasoning for splitting up,
Speaker 1: which I think everybody knows was kind of, you know,
Speaker 1: some not so great decisions on Jack's part that kind
Speaker 1: of caused some tension and some stress.
Speaker 3: From what I was gonna say, wasn't he the one
Speaker 3: that was like always cheating?
Speaker 1: Yeah, just allegedly Yeah, and you know, and then now
Speaker 1: all of a sudden, it's like she's doing this, is
Speaker 1: this kind of settling the score?
Speaker 2: Is this she's you know, made a decision that she's
Speaker 2: over it? And is there a timeline? Like what's the
Speaker 2: appropriate timeline?
Speaker 1: Like you know, guys have a saying which is not
Speaker 1: a very nice saying, but it's I was like, you know,
Speaker 1: bros before whatever. I believe I can't remember what the
Speaker 1: other word is, but it's basically like you know your
Speaker 1: buddies before, you know, girls whatever.
Speaker 4: But I mean it's like brows before Joanna's right, Oh,
Speaker 4: nowhere you go, bros Before Joe, ladies named Joe.
Speaker 2: But yeah, whatever it is.
Speaker 1: And so ultimately, I think, you know, that kind of
Speaker 1: mindset is supposed to be what what you keep at
Speaker 1: the forefront when it's a guy splitting up, like oh
Speaker 1: my god, you know this is my ex is uh
Speaker 1: you know, uh friend and she's really apparently into me.
Speaker 2: Do when's it? When? Am I okay? You know, I
Speaker 2: don't know that there's ever an okay time for that.
Speaker 4: I like what you said about, you know, him being
Speaker 4: known as this alleged philanderer and now she was waking
Speaker 4: up with one of his friends. Like I think it's interesting,
Speaker 4: like is the playing field level now or is it
Speaker 4: just like completely broken?
Speaker 3: I mean I think I saw an interview with her.
Speaker 3: I mean, she's such a beautiful.
Speaker 4: Girl, and she said something along the lines of, you
Speaker 4: know that she's put all this time and effort into
Speaker 4: this relationship, and you know, throughout watching we watching old
Speaker 4: vander pumpt, you know, she's always saying like I just
Speaker 4: want you to be happy and I don't want you
Speaker 4: to go into your old ways, and you know, she
Speaker 4: just seems very like I wouldn't say sad, but she
Speaker 4: seems always very like concerned that what is what's what
Speaker 4: is that their relationship going to really look like in
Speaker 4: the future.
Speaker 3: And so I was I'm shocked that she she slept
Speaker 3: with one of his friends. I mean, I am I'm shocked.
Speaker 1: I'm a little surprised by it, just just because I
Speaker 1: feel like it might be one of those things that
Speaker 1: you know, it's it's quick, you know, Like you often
Speaker 1: hear that saying the best way to get over someone
Speaker 1: is to get under someone.
Speaker 4: New isn't really the best way. Okay, so fine, so
Speaker 4: you have sex. Let's know, seriously, let's let's break that down.
Speaker 4: So you have sex, right, Okay, you're like, oh, you're
Speaker 4: a jerk.
Speaker 3: I'm mad at you.
Speaker 4: So I'm just gonna go and have sex with this
Speaker 4: other person. But then the sex is over, and then
Speaker 4: you're back to but yourself again, right, feeling like maybe
Speaker 4: for five minutes you're looking.
Speaker 3: In the mirror and you're like.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, but that wears off, and then you're by
Speaker 4: the way walking around and you're you know, out with
Speaker 4: your friends, and your friends are like, how are you?
Speaker 4: Oh I got laid last night, and they're like kind
Speaker 4: of like huh, Like okay, you got laid, but it's
Speaker 4: not like a it's not like you you got laid
Speaker 4: and there was there the emotional connection is there? Right?
Speaker 2: Well, that's the problem, seb.
Speaker 3: That's what a lot of people get really upset about.
Speaker 2: Yeah, is sex canna be greater can suck with anybody.
Speaker 2: So it's like it's not like just hooking up all female.
Speaker 4: So having for me, for someone to have sex with
Speaker 4: someone that's not me, that is like a no, like
Speaker 4: I will never have sex with you again, Like if
Speaker 4: you have sex with someone else, like I'm not going
Speaker 4: to be a part of that, Like, which I understand.
Speaker 4: Go go Hank, go shower in chlorox and like go
Speaker 4: meet someone else, Like I'm not interested.
Speaker 2: No, I get it, I get it. I do get
Speaker 2: that because you're you're about a connection.
Speaker 4: The emotional connection is what people get really freaked out about,
Speaker 4: like the texting back and forth. Oh my god, you
Speaker 4: guys are texting every minute, because that's like the serotonin.
Speaker 4: Like that's why they want you back on all these
Speaker 4: dating apps, is because like there's like a someone's interested
Speaker 4: in you, or it's not like hey, can you, like,
Speaker 4: you know, make this deck for me, or I know,
Speaker 4: can you write this article. It's like you're hot, you're cool, let's.
Speaker 2: Meet yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3: Wild yeah yeah.
Speaker 4: And that's why people get really really freaked out about
Speaker 4: the emotional connection. That's why some people, you know, I
Speaker 4: mean I've had in the past about how guys be
Speaker 4: like you cannot speak or text.
Speaker 3: We had to block all those all that contact.
Speaker 4: And I'm like, yeah, well, I don't really feel it
Speaker 4: like that because I mean, I mean, if I like someone,
Speaker 4: I like them a thousand percent, right, I'm not like
Speaker 4: and then I don't.
Speaker 3: Right, I'm done.
Speaker 2: I'm kind of like that. I see my wife like that,
Speaker 2: not just with guys, but with friendships too. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Can it is pretty cool like that, Like she gets
Speaker 1: if she's if she's if she's yeah, if she's tried
Speaker 1: and not been met in the middle, she's done. And
Speaker 1: I'll be like, oh my god, come on, you know,
Speaker 1: give it one more chance, you know, or whatever, like
Speaker 1: talk about just friendships and things of that nature, which
Speaker 1: she hasn't. You know, She's not likely to throw in
Speaker 1: the towel too easily. But I'm the I'm probably a
Speaker 1: little bit more of a doormat, like I would stay
Speaker 1: a lot longer trying to make it work, you know.
Speaker 1: And she's just like, yeah, now, Fisher cut baite, I'm done.
Speaker 1: I'm like, you know, how do you even know that's saying?
Speaker 3: I mean, that's what I did with my acts. I
Speaker 3: was like, crickets, Yeah, well, kids drive.
Speaker 1: The butts a little bit too right, Like you probably
Speaker 1: you know. I mean, let's be honest, I mean you
Speaker 1: did all the child raising that whole time. I mean
Speaker 1: I would imagine you saw the I and I don't
Speaker 1: mean to comment on your personal life in that regard,
Speaker 1: so I obviously don't know him and don't you know,
Speaker 1: but I would think you probably saw the writing on
Speaker 1: the wall and you're like, Okay, this guy isn't this
Speaker 1: isn't going to go any longer.
Speaker 2: Or something of that nature, Like you knew I'm taking
Speaker 2: this over. Yeah, and you know that that don't like you.
Speaker 3: I don't like you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, on that way with my.
Speaker 3: Serious like you can have your own opinion. You're an adult.
Speaker 3: I'm like, yeah, I am an adult, and I go
Speaker 3: with my kids first.
Speaker 2: I love that I am an adult, and that was
Speaker 2: my decision companies my kids. Yeah, my dog was like that.
Speaker 2: My dog passed away. But I had a yellow Lab
Speaker 2: for thirteen children.
Speaker 3: You're talking about it all, okay, Well.
Speaker 2: I didn't have kids at the time.
Speaker 1: She was my kid, but I would literally ge introduce
Speaker 1: her to people and if if she was kind of
Speaker 1: like a little stand out office, I'm like interesting, and
Speaker 1: I would literally like file that away. I'd be like, Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm watching out for this dude. You know, it was
Speaker 1: kind of it was true, But I'm like that now
Speaker 1: with my kids too. If my kids know when people
Speaker 1: like them and know when they're good people, and they're
Speaker 1: six and three, it's like, you know, at the end
Speaker 1: of the day, I think you made a good choice
Speaker 1: trust in your daughters, because I'm I'm gonna trust my boys.
Speaker 2: You know, if my boys don't like somebody, they don't
Speaker 2: need to be around, you know.
Speaker 4: So Jessica Simpson is trusting her sister and asking her
Speaker 4: for advice. So with her separation from her husband, Eric Johnson,
Speaker 4: they tried couples counseling, which worked for a while, but
Speaker 4: then things went back to the way they were, And
Speaker 4: so she's asking her sister, what do you think about that?
Speaker 1: Who else you gonna ask? I mean, I would definitely
Speaker 1: ask my sister. I mean, at the end of the day,
Speaker 1: you know, my sister and I are really close, and
Speaker 1: you know, if I was going through something like that,
Speaker 1: I mean, it's the it's the one person you think
Speaker 1: you can turn to who probably isn't gonna make it conversation,
Speaker 1: you know, dinner conversation with a bunch of other.
Speaker 2: People, you know, at the end of the day.
Speaker 1: I mean, obviously everyone's relationship is different with their with
Speaker 1: their family members.
Speaker 2: But for me, I would turn to my sister in
Speaker 2: that moment.
Speaker 1: I mean, you're you know, you're feeling vulnerable, You're feeling
Speaker 1: like your whole life is exploding around you.
Speaker 2: You have me for Jessica.
Speaker 1: She's got these beautiful kids, she's got this relationship that
Speaker 1: everyone you know admired.
Speaker 3: From afar m shoe empire.
Speaker 1: The shoe empire is bananas, right, I mean, she's just
Speaker 1: done so well from a business perspective, and we all
Speaker 1: thought she you know, we all thought when she was
Speaker 1: on the Newly Weds back in the day that you know,
Speaker 1: she was the ditzy one. Well she surprised everybody.
Speaker 4: Was Chicken of the seas that I had she was
Speaker 4: Chicken of the Sea.
Speaker 3: I'm dead. I love that.
Speaker 2: I loved it too.
Speaker 3: It was smart, it was she was like number one.
Speaker 4: Realities like Star TV, Star Moments and my Scary I'm
Speaker 4: a period down there was number two, and I and
Speaker 4: I think something from Scary Island was number three.
Speaker 3: So Jessica Simpson and I are like, right there, I
Speaker 3: love that.
Speaker 2: That's awesome.
Speaker 1: Well, you're in good company and making some shoes. I
Speaker 1: was saying, let's go, let's go, somebody's getting that guy
Speaker 1: shoe world because I need some I need some cool shoes.
Speaker 2: I don't have any, but but but you.
Speaker 4: Know what to to her point, one thing that I
Speaker 4: like is I agree with you, but sometimes I feel
Speaker 4: like when you're asking your family and your friends, I
Speaker 4: feel like sometimes I feel like it's too much, and
Speaker 4: I feel like friends just get tired and family get
Speaker 4: tired of saying you know the answer to this, you
Speaker 4: need you need you know you're going to figure this
Speaker 4: out on your own right and therapy Again, Like I
Speaker 4: said before at the beginning, it's changed so much. It's
Speaker 4: not what it used to be. It's not like how
Speaker 4: are you feeling? You know what I mean, it's not
Speaker 4: an SNL s get like that's what it used to
Speaker 4: be like before. I was like, what is she asking me?
Speaker 3: Oh my sugar?
Speaker 4: Like what Now they're like, here are examples of things
Speaker 4: that you've done, and here things are. Here are tools
Speaker 4: to to, like, you know, to kind of not fix yourself,
Speaker 4: but to you know, be aware of these triggers and
Speaker 4: try to like you know, move in a different direction
Speaker 4: either way.
Speaker 1: So it's just so different over and over again. Right,
Speaker 1: It's like I love that sanity. Yeah, yeah, that is
Speaker 1: the definition, you know. I think about like I went
Speaker 1: through couples counseling. My ex wife and I went through
Speaker 1: couples counseling, and I got a lot out of it.
Speaker 1: I mean to the point where like I kept going,
Speaker 1: you know, I kept going after she and I split up.
Speaker 1: I was like, I really love and thankfully the counselor
Speaker 1: was willing to see me because it wasn't normal practice,
Speaker 1: I guess, and.
Speaker 2: I was like, yeah, but I'm not going to start
Speaker 2: fresh with some new person, you know.
Speaker 1: And I actually liked that she had a female perspective too,
Speaker 1: which was helpful for me. You know, some people want
Speaker 1: the guys want to see a guy, you know, or
Speaker 1: the whatever. I really enjoyed seeing her, and but also
Speaker 1: I think, like I said, you know, from a stand
Speaker 1: of of being a bit of a dormat, I probably
Speaker 1: would have stayed in that longer than I should have.
Speaker 1: And it was you know, I think having a female
Speaker 1: figure listening to everything and being able to help me
Speaker 1: see the forest for the trees and be like, Okay,
Speaker 1: it is time to move on, you know, or whatever.
Speaker 2: Was probably pretty helpful, you know. And I think my.
Speaker 4: First, my first and only husband, we went to couples counseling.
Speaker 4: He wore purple socks and he took photos of the
Speaker 4: therapist the entire time, and she's like, she was German,
Speaker 4: She's like, this is not what this is about.
Speaker 3: This is not this is not a photo session.
Speaker 1: Well, the last one that's in the headlines for us
Speaker 1: to talk about today is Tish Cyrus and the Billy
Speaker 1: Ray Tish Ensemble, and that that whole thing.
Speaker 2: For the longest time, I was.
Speaker 1: Like, oh my god, Billy Ray's ikey breaking, He's got
Speaker 1: it together. Look at this wonderful family life love And
Speaker 1: then you find out yeah, yeah, I mean I've met
Speaker 1: Tish once or twice. I thought she was lovely, and
Speaker 1: it's like you get a chance to kind of peek
Speaker 1: behind the curtain and you realize everybody's got issues, right,
Speaker 1: everybody's got stuff going on and you know, trying to
Speaker 1: work through it. And you know, I think for her,
Speaker 1: you know again, you know, she's she's saying kind of
Speaker 1: a recurring theme here, at least from what I've been
Speaker 1: saying too, like there sometimes you stay in it longer
Speaker 1: than you're supposed to, and you know, I think there's
Speaker 1: there's probably a lot of that that people go through.
Speaker 1: And maybe that's why every year around the end of
Speaker 1: the year, when people are thinking about how to brand
Speaker 1: themselves going into the new year, or how they're going
Speaker 1: to tackle this new year differently, or New Year's resolutions
Speaker 1: or whatever it might be, maybe that's why we start
Speaker 1: finding out about all these people splitting up at the
Speaker 1: end of the year. You know, it's like it's been
Speaker 1: coming for a while and they are just finally at
Speaker 1: the at their breaking point and they're finally at their
Speaker 1: place where they want a level set.
Speaker 2: Moving into the new year. And I don't know, maybe
Speaker 2: that's maybe that's how they're doing it. What do you think?
Speaker 4: I mean, you know, first of all, they've had a
Speaker 4: tumultuous relationship, and you know it's like they're such an
Speaker 4: amazing family.
Speaker 3: I mean, she's such a momager.
Speaker 4: She's like raised like all these incredible children and been
Speaker 4: a great wife to him, and I mean there's just
Speaker 4: like they're just the family that just just like the
Speaker 4: gift that keeps on giving, do you know what I mean.
Speaker 4: It's like one's talented, the other talented, and the others
Speaker 4: more talented. I mean, it's just like they're just they're
Speaker 4: just constantly bringing just in credible talent to us. And
Speaker 4: so it's just so hard. I think it's hard for
Speaker 4: us as like an outsider, because we love them so much,
Speaker 4: all of the every everyone in the family, because we've
Speaker 4: seen them whether it's on television or you know, singing
Speaker 4: or wherever it's been, and we were raised with them, you.
Speaker 3: Know, with Miley, and.
Speaker 4: It's just really really hard to see people that you
Speaker 4: love so much not be happy, and you know, whether
Speaker 4: however they're navigating this brave world. You know, it's like
Speaker 4: from the outsider, we just it's like, you know, they're
Speaker 4: you know, I love that.
Speaker 3: It's like stars are just like us. They pump gas,
Speaker 3: they get divorced, you.
Speaker 2: Know, they also drive vehicles, They.
Speaker 3: Their children, just like they rush so teeth.
Speaker 4: We put them on such a pedestal for obvious reasons
Speaker 4: because we love and adore them so much, and then
Speaker 4: when we hear that there's heartbreak, or when we hear
Speaker 4: that any kind of scandal, it's almost like disbelief, and
Speaker 4: it just it it cuts deep for us because we
Speaker 4: love them, and I think it's such a it must
Speaker 4: be such a huge responsibility for them too. It's like
Speaker 4: they need to go on with their lives and they
Speaker 4: need to find out what, you know, how they're going
Speaker 4: to like navigate their own future and what that looks
Speaker 4: like for them. Do you think that anybody on this list?
Speaker 4: So we had like Tish, we had Jessica Simpson, we
Speaker 4: had Brittany, we had Christina, And is there anybody on
Speaker 4: the list that you think that could get back together
Speaker 4: and if they could hold on, if they could get
Speaker 4: back together, what do you think that that would look
Speaker 4: like from your perspective?
Speaker 2: Gosh, well, I don't don't no.
Speaker 1: I mean, man, when I think about all these couples,
Speaker 1: I think the the Ben and Gen thing might be
Speaker 1: the one, right, because it's almost like that's the one
Speaker 1: that hasn't I don't know. I always feel like it's
Speaker 1: still kind of hanging on, lingering, and they proved to
Speaker 1: us this time that they weren't afraid to give it
Speaker 1: another try, so maybe, but there again, I mean, I
Speaker 1: think I think, you know, again, from the outside looking in,
Speaker 1: I feel like Ben needs to work on Ben first
Speaker 1: and get Ben to a good spot, because I've seen
Speaker 1: some interviews with him where he just seems brooding and unhappy,
Speaker 1: and it's like, you know, I think, you know, for
Speaker 1: all the the great things that you've had that have
Speaker 1: come your way, it's like, you know, it might not
Speaker 1: be a bad idea to recognize those little bits. So
Speaker 1: some gratitude to those types of things and feel good
Speaker 1: about who you are before you try to, like you said,
Speaker 1: use the biggest band aid you can find, or what
Speaker 1: that's saying that you said, which I also really liked.
Speaker 2: It's like, you know, you can't you can't solve your
Speaker 2: problems by, you know, finding somebody else to dump them on.
Speaker 4: I hope that and Billy, I know that is remarried.
Speaker 4: I hope that they get back together and the whole
Speaker 4: family is one big, happy family and then we have
Speaker 4: a we have a big new show and they have
Speaker 4: all this music and like we're all invited to Nashville.
Speaker 2: The whole world. I would love that.
Speaker 3: I would love them.
Speaker 4: I just love that family. I don't know what it
Speaker 4: is like, I just I don't know, They're just like there.
Speaker 4: I just I love how she moms. I've seen her
Speaker 4: in action, and I love how she's such an entrepreneur
Speaker 4: but she's still loving and I love how she tried
Speaker 4: to keep the marriage together for a long time.
Speaker 3: And I know that she's remarried.
Speaker 4: But you know, and I kind of I asked you
Speaker 4: the question, but I'm interrupting you, which is one of
Speaker 4: my which is one of my traits.
Speaker 3: But I'm working on it. But I'm actually not going
Speaker 3: to work on it right now.
Speaker 4: That's so good, it's one of my It's on my
Speaker 4: to do list, but I'm a roasted for right now.
Speaker 4: I kind of feel that Jacks and Brittany are going.
Speaker 3: To get back together. Okay, I would kind of feel
Speaker 3: that now they're going to be like whoa.
Speaker 2: Especially now that they have a baby.
Speaker 1: Like I feel like that's that's that's one of those
Speaker 1: things too, Like I wanted to work because they have
Speaker 1: a baby, and I want them to figure out a
Speaker 1: way to get over it and move on and find
Speaker 1: each other again and you know, just be happy.
Speaker 2: So let's let's I like that. Let's let's end on
Speaker 2: that note.
Speaker 1: We're we're seeing three potential reconciliations here in the new year,
Speaker 1: perhaps and you know, I think that would be pretty great.
Speaker 2: Kelly.
Speaker 1: First of all, I have loved getting to talk to
Speaker 1: you even better, even better than I expected and I had.
Speaker 1: I had high hopes and high expectations just from having
Speaker 1: watched you on the show, how I thought it would
Speaker 1: be to meet you in person.
Speaker 2: But what a joy.
Speaker 1: And you are such a lovely person, and so I
Speaker 1: feel even more compelled to root for you every time
Speaker 1: I see you than I have been in the past,
Speaker 1: which I always rooted for you anyway, So this is
Speaker 1: this makes me very happy.
Speaker 2: So thank you for.
Speaker 3: Today, my God love, it's your beautiful family. And to
Speaker 3: your mom.
Speaker 2: Yes she's over here playing slots on her iPad. She's
Speaker 2: doing great well. Thank you so much.
Speaker 1: You know a lot of what we're taking away from
Speaker 1: today celebs go through the relationship ups and Donal's just
Speaker 1: like us, right. It's hard to navigate a breakup or
Speaker 1: a divorce at any time of a year, but the
Speaker 1: holidays can definitely make it extra tough. So thanks to
Speaker 1: Kelly for joining me. She always brings such great insight
Speaker 1: to the show.
Speaker 2: And if you're a.
Speaker 1: Divorce they're ready to date again, or you want some advice,
Speaker 1: we want to hear from you, so seriously call us.
Speaker 2: Email us.
Speaker 1: You can call one eight four four four I Do
Speaker 1: Pod which is eight four four four four three six
Speaker 1: seven sixty three, or you can email us at the
Speaker 1: idpod at iHeartRadio dot com, follow us on Instagram and
Speaker 1: TikTok at I Do Part two pod, and all this
Speaker 1: information will be available in the show notes. To make
Speaker 1: sure to rate it, review the podcast for us. Let
Speaker 1: everybody know that you loved Kelly and I chatting and
Speaker 1: about all this great stuff I Do Part two. It's
Speaker 1: an iHeart podcast where falling in love is the main objective.
Speaker 2: Exer