WEBVTT - The Sick Deli Worker

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<v Speaker 1>Don't answer the phone.

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<v Speaker 2>Elvis Duran, the Elvis Duran phone tapp Hello, Garrett, Hey,

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<v Speaker 2>phone tap? What do you have?

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<v Speaker 1>All? Right?

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<v Speaker 2>Well, Valerie wants to phone tap her husband Shane. Now

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<v Speaker 2>Shane is a huge germophobe.

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<v Speaker 3>Right, so Valerie is going to start the call to

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<v Speaker 3>our husband Shane, letting them know, Hey, I'm gonna think

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<v Speaker 3>you up a sandwich from the deli?

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<v Speaker 2>What do you want? And then it goes from there.

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<v Speaker 2>A germophobe eating a deli sandwich? This could be weird.

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<v Speaker 2>Let's listen to the phone tap.

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<v Speaker 1>Here we go.

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<v Speaker 4>Hello, what's going on? He's going, oh, nothing, just have

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<v Speaker 4>so many errands today. Listen, I was thinking about just

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<v Speaker 4>grabbing you some some lunch and just swinging it by

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<v Speaker 4>the office.

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<v Speaker 1>What do you think, Thay, what are you gonna get?

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<v Speaker 5>Well, that's a little sub shop. I'm thinking I'm gonna

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<v Speaker 5>get like a chicken parm Just.

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<v Speaker 1>Give me what you're getting? That sounds good?

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<v Speaker 5>I'm there right now, Yeah, I need in one second?

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<v Speaker 1>What was that?

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah?

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<v Speaker 5>Just too large chicken?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I'm sorry, I'm sorry you guys.

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<v Speaker 5>Get the water?

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<v Speaker 4>Yeahs kicking the orders he's coughing.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, what can I get you the moment.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, I'm sorry, no, do not do not order anything

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<v Speaker 1>from him. I don't want him coughing all over our food.

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<v Speaker 4>But it just got a tickle. He probably just got

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<v Speaker 4>sick because.

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<v Speaker 1>You know he looks so good.

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<v Speaker 3>No, no, no, no, yeah, how can I How can I

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<v Speaker 3>help you?

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<v Speaker 5>Man?

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<v Speaker 1>What can I get you chick? No? No, I don't

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<v Speaker 1>want I do not want to eat from that establishment.

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<v Speaker 2>No, all right, I'll be right back to ring you up.

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<v Speaker 4>I don't know if he's really going to be on

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<v Speaker 4>making the food.

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<v Speaker 5>It looks like you might be the person.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't care. Any establishment that will allow someone as

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<v Speaker 1>sick as that to come in the conditions cannot be

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<v Speaker 1>sanitary in the least. I don't want to eat from there.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm sorry.

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<v Speaker 5>I don't want to like this.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't want this nice and it's not all over

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<v Speaker 1>my food. I'm sorry.

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<v Speaker 4>No, it's gonna be fine.

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<v Speaker 1>It's not gonna be fine. It's coughing all over the

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<v Speaker 1>Excuse me, mam, do you have a tilace?

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<v Speaker 5>Don't?

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<v Speaker 1>It's no idea.

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<v Speaker 5>How filthy that is?

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<v Speaker 3>Is?

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<v Speaker 2>He placing the otter?

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<v Speaker 1>Hello, excuse me? What's your name?

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<v Speaker 2>George?

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, George well, I'm just gonna let you know that

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<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna be calling Human Health Services today and reporting you.

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<v Speaker 1>This is ridiculous. What are you doing at work coughing

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<v Speaker 1>the way you are? You sick? I don't care what

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<v Speaker 1>it is, it's you. I'm calling Human Health services.

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<v Speaker 2>Why would you like on your sub?

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<v Speaker 1>I don't want to sub. Put my wife back on

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<v Speaker 1>the phone.

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<v Speaker 2>Why don't you want to sub? Now what you.

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<v Speaker 1>Because you're snotting and flamming and coughing all over it,

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<v Speaker 1>that's why. And I don't appreciate having other people's bodily

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<v Speaker 1>fluids answering into mine.

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<v Speaker 3>I have this knee guard right in front of me,

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<v Speaker 3>so we're okay. Nothing's getting on there.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't care if you're in an air tight room.

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<v Speaker 1>You're not touching my food. You're not getting anywhere near

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<v Speaker 1>my food. Put my wife back on the phone.

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<v Speaker 2>It's all right. I'm using my other hand to blow

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<v Speaker 2>my nose, so it's okay.

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<v Speaker 5>You know what.

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<v Speaker 1>Are you talking? You're using your other hand your.

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<v Speaker 2>Rough Do you have cameras watching me? Because I'm not

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<v Speaker 2>coughing on your head?

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<v Speaker 1>No, but you're coughing on the register. Someone's gonna touch

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<v Speaker 1>the register. They're going to come back and touch the food,

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<v Speaker 1>and food's gonna enter into my body and I'm gonna

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<v Speaker 1>get whatever sick germs are running into out of your system. Man,

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<v Speaker 1>I don't have time today.

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<v Speaker 2>You don't know what I go through. Man, I'm pulling

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<v Speaker 2>a double shift, and.

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<v Speaker 5>You know it's just I don't care.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't care. My wife on the phone. Put her

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<v Speaker 1>back on the phone. Put her on the phone. Now, Now.

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<v Speaker 4>What are you doing?

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<v Speaker 1>You're doing disgusting. This guy is coughing and sneezing all

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<v Speaker 1>over that place, even if he's not cooking the food.

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<v Speaker 1>It's got to be impossible for his journeys not to

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<v Speaker 1>get all over lit.

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<v Speaker 4>You even even do the phone.

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<v Speaker 1>What is wrong with you?

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<v Speaker 5>You gotta clean down.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't want a snot cal zone today. Okay, it's

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<v Speaker 1>not my idea of a satisfying meal.

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<v Speaker 5>I wonder sometimes, why don't you just keep a tube

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<v Speaker 5>purell next to that when we have sex, or maybe

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<v Speaker 5>you can work them out fanlastic gloves or something. Because

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<v Speaker 5>you are just taking this way out of control. I'm here,

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<v Speaker 5>the poor guy's having a coughing fit. You could be

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<v Speaker 5>a little bit more understanding.

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<v Speaker 1>You feel sorry for this guy. It's puking up snot

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<v Speaker 1>all over our lunch. I don't know. I don't know

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<v Speaker 1>about you, but I don't want lunch anymore. I don't

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<v Speaker 1>have an appetite.

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<v Speaker 3>Well, I'm asusing it.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm that guy coming out of his face.

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<v Speaker 2>Excuse me, ma'am.

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<v Speaker 1>Can I just apologize it?

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<v Speaker 2>Can I apologize to him?

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<v Speaker 5>Well?

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<v Speaker 1>I don't want to talk to him about.

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<v Speaker 3>Excuse me, sir. I just wanted to say, you've been

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<v Speaker 3>phone tapped. Hello, he Shane, your wife Valerie wanted to

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<v Speaker 3>play a phone tap on you. My name is Garre

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<v Speaker 3>from Elvis Duran in the Morning Shown't that funny?

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<v Speaker 1>No knowing it was funny, It was horrifying.

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<v Speaker 2>The Elvis Duran phone tap.

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<v Speaker 4>This phone tab was pre recorded with permission granted by

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<v Speaker 4>all participants.

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<v Speaker 1>The Elvis Duran phone tap only on Elvis Duran in

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<v Speaker 1>the Morning Show.