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Speaker 1: I told my pregnant daughter, I don't care about you

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Speaker 1: right now? Am I the a hole?

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Speaker 2: I don't care about you, your baby, or any of

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Speaker 2: the problems these Get those problems away from me. You're

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Speaker 2: infecting my vibe.

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Speaker 1: Get out of my face. My vibes aren't infect that.

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Speaker 2: I'm trying to be a good vibe trained and you're

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Speaker 2: like a bad vibe train.

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Speaker 1: Oh choo choo away from me, chick or chicka. Alright,

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Speaker 1: So I female forty nine, have two kids, Christina female

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Speaker 1: twenty six and Dwight male sixteen. Dwight is neuro diversion

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Speaker 1: and needs my attention and my husband's all the time.

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Speaker 1: Since there's lots of things that he can't do by himself,

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Speaker 1: I am his primary caregiver. Christina got married and is

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Speaker 1: now pregnant, and I'm happy for her. But the problem

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Speaker 1: is she wants my attention all the time.

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Speaker 2: She's kidding me, some pregnant lady wants my attention. Oh

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Speaker 2: she's my daughter? No, thank you.

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Speaker 1: Gowing in on him?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, come on.

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Speaker 1: She knows that I have to take care of her brother,

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Speaker 1: but still calls me up all the time and asked

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Speaker 1: me to go with her to appointments and whatnot go with.

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Speaker 2: You to appointments? Is this a charity case? Last time

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Speaker 2: I checked, I thought you were an adunl't not a

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Speaker 2: whitey baby? Are you having a baby or becoming one?

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Speaker 1: Damn? Sam has just chosen violence today on this story.

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Speaker 1: As ladies and gentleman. I told her several times that

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Speaker 1: I can't unless it's an emergency, since Dwight gets severe

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Speaker 1: anxiety in hospitals and I can't leave him alone. She

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Speaker 1: still gets upset, And.

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Speaker 2: You say, Dwight, I'm imagining Dwight from me?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that is you know, Yeah, I feel you. She

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Speaker 1: still gets upset because she thinks I can just leave

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Speaker 1: him with a nurse for a couple hours.

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Speaker 2: Can't leave him.

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Speaker 1: I'm also like, isn't this your brother? Like don't you

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Speaker 1: also know like growing up with him and like what

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Speaker 1: he needs is sure?

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Speaker 2: Also, I'm being like completely uh, I'm I'm being sarcastic

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Speaker 2: with my cause to be clear.

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Speaker 1: Are you sure?

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Speaker 2: I mean the fact that the mother can't step away

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Speaker 2: for a second to be with the daughter. Yeah, through

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Speaker 2: the birth red flag, I say, divorce the mom.

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Speaker 1: Oh man, this is this is great. A commentary pro

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Speaker 1: Sam Tonight.

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Speaker 2: Ladies and gentlemen late boys get late.

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Speaker 1: I think the pregnancy hormones might be affecting her too much.

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Speaker 2: Fucking dumb bitch, this idiot.

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Speaker 1: God, and she wants to fight for her mom's attention.

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Speaker 2: Bro, This mom's deluded. Bro, this this your daughter just

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Speaker 2: wants you to be there through her birth. She's not Bro.

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Speaker 1: I'm on the other side. Yeah, it would be okay

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Speaker 1: if it wasn't because her brother needs special care. She's

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Speaker 1: gonna give birth soon, and she asked me to go

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Speaker 1: stay at her house for a bit before the birth

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Speaker 1: and some weeks after the baby's born. I told her

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Speaker 1: I can't do that. I would need to take Dwight

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Speaker 1: with me, and she won't be able to relax with

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Speaker 1: him there, since he can be a bit of a

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Speaker 1: troublemaker sometimes. She's, you know, getting into around.

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Speaker 2: The office, sending those memos about the dress, sitting on

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Speaker 2: sitting on empty chairs.

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Speaker 1: She told me to leave him with his dad and nurse. Okay,

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Speaker 1: that's new information.

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Speaker 2: They have a dad. There's a dad and a nurse there.

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Speaker 2: Come on.

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Speaker 1: I told her that she needs to understand that my

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Speaker 1: priority is taking care of my son now and I

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Speaker 1: have to be there for him. She argued that she's

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Speaker 1: my daughter too, and she needs me since she has

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Speaker 1: no one else. I told her that's a lie, because

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Speaker 1: she has her husband. And I also said that maybe

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Speaker 1: when her kid is born, she'll understand that as a mom,

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Speaker 1: your first priority are your kids, and even more if

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Speaker 1: they are special needs and need you all the time.

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Speaker 1: Now that she's an adult, she doesn't need me and

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Speaker 1: she's not my priority. She cried and insulted me, and

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Speaker 1: she said that she'll never be able to forget that

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Speaker 1: I chose her brother over her and during such a

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Speaker 1: hard moment for her, am I the ahole? This is

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Speaker 1: an interesting one to me. I'm very curious everyone to

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Speaker 1: hear what you think in the comments below what you

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Speaker 1: would do, Sam, We already know some of your thoughts.

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Speaker 2: Okay, okay, So well, how old is this this brother?

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Speaker 1: Sixteen?

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Speaker 2: What it sounds like to me is that ever since

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Speaker 2: the kid was born, Yeah, the daughter has taken a backseat.

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Speaker 1: Right.

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Speaker 2: It sounds like she hasn't really had her mother there.

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Speaker 2: And the fact that the mom can't even take a

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Speaker 2: moment to be there with the daughter through a pregnancy, yeah,

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Speaker 2: shows like I feel like it shows that, yes, of course,

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Speaker 2: taking care of the special needs kid is hard, but

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Speaker 2: like to not even try to be there for your

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Speaker 2: daughter is it's going to ruin your relationship with your daughter. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: and there's a nurse and the dad in fact, like like,

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Speaker 2: are you really can't step away for a few moments

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Speaker 2: to be there with your daughter?

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Speaker 1: Totally? Yeah, I was definitely more on the opposite side

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Speaker 1: of the argument, But now I'm a little bit. I

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Speaker 1: was a little bit. I got closer and closer as

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Speaker 1: the story went on. I think one thing that would

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Speaker 1: be very helpful to know in this in this scenario

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Speaker 1: is a more detailed understanding of what the care looks like.

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Speaker 1: Because it's like, we know, we know the son is neurodivergent,

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Speaker 1: wear on the spectrum, et cetera. You know what what

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Speaker 1: what all does that entail for those of us who.

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Speaker 2: Regardless, let's say it's like you know, your f it's

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Speaker 2: some of like let's say it's like really like he

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Speaker 2: needs a lot of care. Yes, that mother is saying

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Speaker 2: that she literally cannot be there for the birth of

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Speaker 2: her child or for like some appointments to like like

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Speaker 2: she cannot be a mother to her at all basically period.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, like come on, no, I totally, I totally

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Speaker 1: that's it.

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Speaker 2: She's basically like like what she's saying is like, hey,

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Speaker 2: I can't be a mother to you for the rest

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Speaker 2: of your life, right because.

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Speaker 1: Because this is like one of the most needed moments

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Speaker 1: where it's like I'm man like.

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Speaker 2: And also like, I mean, if if this kid is

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Speaker 2: needing so much care at sixteen, it's probably going to

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Speaker 2: continue into his twenties, into his thirties, into his forties.

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Speaker 2: So like is the mother to say, hey, like, you're

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Speaker 2: not my daughter anymore. I don't want a relationship with you.

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Speaker 2: I don't want a relationship with my grandchild.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. I think the big thing here is there's the dad,

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Speaker 1: the nurse. So it's like, exactly, take take the opportunity

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Speaker 1: to with your daughter for an hour. Yeah yeah, you're right.

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Speaker 2: Yeah right, yeah, Like yeah, that's right, you're right, you

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Speaker 2: are right, And I it just seems a little ridiculous

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Speaker 2: to not be there for your daughter at all.

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Speaker 1: I am more like on her side than I think

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Speaker 1: you are in this in this scenario. But yeah, definitely.

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Speaker 1: It's like there are these key moments, like going to

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Speaker 1: the ultrasound, like going to the first ultrasound. These are

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Speaker 1: things that will literally have going to the first ultrasound

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Speaker 1: for your first child. Happens one time, happens one time the.

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Speaker 2: Birth, especially if I mean, like you know, I'm never

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Speaker 2: gonna be pregnant, so like I don't want to speak

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Speaker 2: too soon, but come on, yeah, you know, we got

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Speaker 2: the twenty three. I'm trying to get a US. But

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Speaker 2: like I imagine for a woman who it becomes pregnant,

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Speaker 2: they want to like understand what that means from their.

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Speaker 1: Mother who was pregnant with them.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like like I needed advice, right, I mean,

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Speaker 2: the same thing I'm gonna do with my dad. Like hey,

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Speaker 2: like like when I become a father, I'm like, your dad,

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Speaker 2: what's up with this? Yeah, like like tell me, tell

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Speaker 2: me what's good? So, yeah, I think it's it's kind

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Speaker 2: of ridiculous, but I would love to know what bant

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Speaker 2: and right, maybe I'm completely wrong. Please let me know.

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Speaker 2: Tear my asshole apart or eat it out if you

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Speaker 2: think I'm right.

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Speaker 1: There we go drop your comments. Ladies and gentlemen, see you.

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Speaker 2: Today. I fked up by finding the love of my

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Speaker 2: life and when she went in for the kiss, I

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Speaker 2: gave her a firmadgick, okay, this is okay. Ope, I'm

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Speaker 2: same with honor and I'm John Fry and John, what

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Speaker 2: is like the worst case of you ever? Like misinterpreting

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Speaker 2: signals from interested women?

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Speaker 1: Oh man, your lady suitors, lady suitors. I remember when

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Speaker 1: I was in like seventh grade or so, there was

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Speaker 1: a girl Nadia.

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Speaker 2: Shout out to Nadia, you know.

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Speaker 1: I was like, hey, I'm about it, and so I

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Speaker 1: asked her out and then she said yes. I was like,

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Speaker 1: oh great, this is so great. And then she came

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Speaker 1: back a day later and she's like, hey, I'm so sorry.

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Speaker 1: I only said yes out of pity and I don't

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Speaker 1: be in a relationship out of kitty. Yeah. Like she

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Speaker 1: didn't phrase it exactly like that, but it's essentially essentially

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Speaker 1: what she.

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Speaker 2: I was like, Oh god, what do you even say

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Speaker 2: to that.

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Speaker 1: I tried to convince her. I'm like, no, it's okay,

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Speaker 1: Like we could give it a shot, you know, like,

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Speaker 1: b you're a twelve year old boy. You're just like,

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Speaker 1: oh my gosh, like if I have the slimmest shot

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Speaker 1: at this, like pretty girl, let me just let me

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Speaker 1: just go all the way in hindsight, It's like, bro,

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Speaker 1: how are you going to convince someone who just said

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Speaker 1: she got with you out of pity? Like?

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Speaker 2: Oh man, oh I love it? Sad Well, well, I

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Speaker 2: have a story that I think is even worse than that.

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Speaker 1: Okay, let's see it today.

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Speaker 2: I fked up by finding the love of my life,

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Speaker 2: and when she went in for the kiss, I gave

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Speaker 2: her a firm handshake.

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Speaker 1: Plus, you're doing business with you. Some backstory.

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Speaker 2: I met this girl when I was taking a few

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Speaker 2: summer courses to complete my remaining credits for my bachelor's degree. Oh,

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Speaker 2: how ironic the name is. I assume op is a

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Speaker 2: big boy bachelor.

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Speaker 1: Big bachelor.

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Speaker 2: I was drawn to her right away because she has

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Speaker 2: an exotic, Slavic sounding name. For the sake of anonymity,

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Speaker 2: we'll call her Zavetlana who She was radiant. She was beautiful, silent,

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Speaker 2: and distant, like the northern lights flowing in the sky.

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Speaker 2: And like most people who aren't used to seeing the

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Speaker 2: northern lights, I'd often catch myself just staring at her

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Speaker 2: like an idiot. I was lost in thought. I guess

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Speaker 2: the only difference is that the northern lights don't get

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Speaker 2: weirded out when you stare at them for extended periods

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Speaker 2: with your mouth hanging open like a lombotomy. Patience. Oh,

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Speaker 2: that was one of my first mistakes.

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Speaker 1: This guy is quite a way of describing things.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, this man's literally drooling over this lady. Anyways,

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Speaker 2: I'd say nary a word to Fetlana, but wanted to

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Speaker 2: find a way to get to know her outside of class,

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Speaker 2: where it was a bit less unwieldy to start up

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Speaker 2: a conversation versus. Hey, tectonic shifted, pretty sweet eye, you

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Speaker 2: like the red hot chili peppers. So I had a

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Speaker 2: stroke of genius, or so I thought. I would invite

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Speaker 2: my entire class, which is pretty small, maybe twenty people,

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Speaker 2: to go to the movies, with the hopes that she

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Speaker 2: would go too.

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Speaker 1: And it worked.

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Speaker 2: Hey, his nastardly plan worked. She signed up on the

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Speaker 2: Facebook group I created for the event. I know, I'm

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Speaker 2: practically Rico suave when it comes to putting on the moves.

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00:11:23,559 --> 00:11:25,880
Speaker 2: It was settled. She and I and about ten people

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Speaker 2: from our class were going to see a horror movie

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Speaker 2: on Saturday.

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Speaker 1: Perfect with the plan. Commence f up number one.

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Speaker 2: We get to the movies, everyone's dancing awkwardly around the

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Speaker 2: Oh hey, now we're outside of class. We're being forced

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00:11:38,720 --> 00:11:42,360
Speaker 2: to interact at a non academic level situation myself included.

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Speaker 2: We sit down in the seats near the back of

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Speaker 2: the theater, and I make sure I sit right beside

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Speaker 2: my love Mia more Settlana. I wasn't planning on anything

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00:11:52,800 --> 00:11:55,880
Speaker 2: particularly nefarious, but I figured it'd be a fun way

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Speaker 2: to break the ice if I waited for a scary

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00:11:58,280 --> 00:12:00,959
Speaker 2: part and then grabbed her knee to gear the beajeevas

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00:12:00,960 --> 00:12:03,840
Speaker 2: out of her, which I imagined would produce a hilarious

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Speaker 2: shriek followed by startling laughter and then long talks about

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00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:09,360
Speaker 2: our future life together as husband and wife.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that doesn't sound like the best plane ever.

241
00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:14,720
Speaker 2: What do you mean? That's perfectly exactly our will happen.

242
00:12:14,920 --> 00:12:19,199
Speaker 2: So there I sat, hand poised inconspicuously by my side,

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00:12:19,600 --> 00:12:23,640
Speaker 2: ready to pounce. Sure q f up number one. The

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00:12:23,720 --> 00:12:27,040
Speaker 2: scary part. It happened when a sidecaracter got hit by

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00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:30,080
Speaker 2: a monster, and it startled me so badly that I

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00:12:30,240 --> 00:12:34,640
Speaker 2: tensed up and punched her in the apping away really

247
00:12:34,679 --> 00:12:38,160
Speaker 2: freaking hard, like hard enough that she crumpled forward and

248
00:12:38,240 --> 00:12:39,920
Speaker 2: almost hit her head on the seat in front of

249
00:12:39,960 --> 00:12:44,960
Speaker 2: her stop great ice breaker, pal show her you're unpredictably violent,

250
00:12:45,080 --> 00:12:49,600
Speaker 2: particularly when startled. I apologized profusely and Setlana assured me

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00:12:49,679 --> 00:12:51,920
Speaker 2: that she was okay, but I knew I'd given her

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00:12:51,960 --> 00:12:55,440
Speaker 2: a macho man Randy Savage Charlie Horse, and I felt

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Speaker 2: especially Dirby. I spent the rest of the movie wishing

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00:12:58,400 --> 00:13:01,480
Speaker 2: I was dead. F up number two. We left the

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00:13:01,520 --> 00:13:04,360
Speaker 2: movies standing outside the same group of classmates who didn't

256
00:13:04,360 --> 00:13:07,160
Speaker 2: really know each other any better after having sat silently

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Speaker 2: through a horror movie. That's the thing about horror movies, dude,

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00:13:10,120 --> 00:13:11,679
Speaker 2: Like movies in general, you don't really get to know

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00:13:11,720 --> 00:13:14,680
Speaker 2: the person you're with. A terrible first date but not terrible,

260
00:13:14,720 --> 00:13:15,880
Speaker 2: but a little bit Do you want to get to

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Speaker 2: know them?

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00:13:16,080 --> 00:13:16,760
Speaker 1: A little bit terrible?

263
00:13:16,800 --> 00:13:19,319
Speaker 2: A little bit terrible? We dance awkwardly around the How

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00:13:19,360 --> 00:13:21,240
Speaker 2: do I say goodbye to a group of people that

265
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Speaker 2: I don't really know? Situation myself included.

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Speaker 1: Do they really not know each other? Like?

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00:13:25,960 --> 00:13:28,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, they just were like in class then, and I

268
00:13:28,080 --> 00:13:29,480
Speaker 2: guess you know, they're not really talking. Maybe it's like

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Speaker 2: a college class, you.

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Speaker 1: Know, all right?

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00:13:30,679 --> 00:13:33,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, fit Lana, since she'd be taking the bus home

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00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:36,400
Speaker 2: and It turns out I was taking the same bus.

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Speaker 2: We hadn't really talked since I smashed her leg like

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Speaker 2: the effing hole, so I figured this could be my

275
00:13:42,400 --> 00:13:44,600
Speaker 2: chance to try to smooth things over all. Right, we

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00:13:44,720 --> 00:13:46,720
Speaker 2: both get on the bus and I try to sit

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Speaker 2: aside it casually is pausible, And then I say something

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00:13:50,840 --> 00:13:54,800
Speaker 2: pretty stupid and vacuous, like, hey, so the movie pretty scary? Uh?

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Speaker 1: So bad? So bad? I know.

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00:13:57,960 --> 00:14:01,320
Speaker 2: But she entertained my stupid and vacuous question, and we

281
00:14:01,320 --> 00:14:03,200
Speaker 2: actually ended up having a really nice talk. She was

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00:14:03,200 --> 00:14:06,920
Speaker 2: into music, I was into music. She liked hiking. I

283
00:14:07,080 --> 00:14:08,920
Speaker 2: liked hiking, that sort of thing that.

284
00:14:08,880 --> 00:14:10,800
Speaker 1: Sounds like, oh you watched The Office too.

285
00:14:11,080 --> 00:14:13,280
Speaker 2: Wow, we're both so cultured and unique.

286
00:14:13,400 --> 00:14:14,040
Speaker 1: We meant to be.

287
00:14:14,280 --> 00:14:15,920
Speaker 2: We got to her stop and I said, this is

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00:14:15,920 --> 00:14:18,000
Speaker 2: actually only a few blocks from my place. You want

289
00:14:18,000 --> 00:14:19,760
Speaker 2: me to walk you home? Nervous that I might be

290
00:14:19,760 --> 00:14:22,800
Speaker 2: imposing too much, but she responded with, wow, really, no

291
00:14:22,880 --> 00:14:25,160
Speaker 2: one has ever asked to walk me home before. That's

292
00:14:25,200 --> 00:14:28,360
Speaker 2: so sweet, Nail there, she still have a chance of

293
00:14:28,480 --> 00:14:31,600
Speaker 2: salvaging this q fup number two. So I walk up

294
00:14:31,640 --> 00:14:34,000
Speaker 2: to her house, and the whole way we're talking about

295
00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:37,600
Speaker 2: life passion the universe at large. We get to her

296
00:14:37,600 --> 00:14:40,440
Speaker 2: house and the night is perfect. It's warm, quiet, a

297
00:14:40,480 --> 00:14:43,800
Speaker 2: gentle summer breeze through the oak trees, soft glow from

298
00:14:43,840 --> 00:14:46,720
Speaker 2: distant street lights. She says, well, this is my place,

299
00:14:46,800 --> 00:14:48,920
Speaker 2: and we stand there looking at each other. She is

300
00:14:49,040 --> 00:14:51,440
Speaker 2: rocking back and forth from her heels to her toes,

301
00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:55,320
Speaker 2: looking at me, almost expectantly the look, and then she

302
00:14:55,440 --> 00:14:58,320
Speaker 2: moves in a bit closer. She starts to lean forward,

303
00:14:58,720 --> 00:15:03,440
Speaker 2: and I shake her hand, Oh why shake her effing

304
00:15:03,520 --> 00:15:06,640
Speaker 2: in ladies and gentlemen. Her eyes opened and her face

305
00:15:06,720 --> 00:15:09,760
Speaker 2: contorted ever so slightly into a scowl of disgust, and

306
00:15:09,800 --> 00:15:10,600
Speaker 2: I say.

307
00:15:10,560 --> 00:15:12,800
Speaker 1: Boy, I had a great nighte fish, wanna.

308
00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:16,480
Speaker 2: Stop or something equally stupid, And I turn around and

309
00:15:16,520 --> 00:15:20,040
Speaker 2: literally run away, like I said Rico swave, folks. I

310
00:15:20,080 --> 00:15:22,600
Speaker 2: spent the rest of the run home wishing I was dead.

311
00:15:22,680 --> 00:15:27,320
Speaker 2: Boy f up number three, the big one. Our departure

312
00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:29,520
Speaker 2: had been awkward enough by my fault alone that I

313
00:15:29,560 --> 00:15:32,120
Speaker 2: basically couldn't bear to talk to Setlana after that. About

314
00:15:32,120 --> 00:15:34,720
Speaker 2: two weeks later, she posted in the same Facebook group,

315
00:15:34,760 --> 00:15:37,160
Speaker 2: not a bad idea after all, advertising that she'd be

316
00:15:37,200 --> 00:15:39,880
Speaker 2: hosting a barbecue at her place in celebration of us

317
00:15:39,920 --> 00:15:43,160
Speaker 2: finishing our course. Hey, parfect, I can prove once and

318
00:15:43,200 --> 00:15:45,360
Speaker 2: for all that I'm not such a bumbling idiot. I

319
00:15:45,440 --> 00:15:48,000
Speaker 2: was so nervous all day. My palms were sweaty, my

320
00:15:48,120 --> 00:15:51,160
Speaker 2: arms weak, mom spaghetti, and I couldn't eat anything. I

321
00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:53,880
Speaker 2: put on my most stylish clothes and showed up, trying.

322
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Speaker 1: To see him.

323
00:15:54,080 --> 00:15:57,000
Speaker 2: Extra cool and aloof, back to the story right right away.

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00:15:57,040 --> 00:15:59,680
Speaker 2: This guy's having social anxiety. The place was loaded with

325
00:15:59,680 --> 00:16:03,120
Speaker 2: like people of whom I knew, maybe four, including Spetlana.

326
00:16:03,200 --> 00:16:05,960
Speaker 2: A few hours in, people started playing beer pong. Perfect.

327
00:16:06,040 --> 00:16:08,120
Speaker 2: I thought, I don't drink regularly, but I'd spent the

328
00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:11,200
Speaker 2: last year playing ping pong every day. I'm that cool.

329
00:16:11,440 --> 00:16:14,200
Speaker 2: So I knew the weight and flight trajectory dynamics of

330
00:16:14,200 --> 00:16:16,880
Speaker 2: a ping pong ball, and I figured I would seize

331
00:16:16,880 --> 00:16:18,880
Speaker 2: this opportunity to really impress.

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00:16:18,560 --> 00:16:20,720
Speaker 1: Her that Lana.

333
00:16:20,800 --> 00:16:24,200
Speaker 2: I shouted, let's play beer pong, same team, to which

334
00:16:24,240 --> 00:16:27,520
Speaker 2: she looked uncomfortable but eventually said, sure, I guess, and

335
00:16:27,640 --> 00:16:30,040
Speaker 2: she walked over to the table with me. Perfect, and

336
00:16:30,240 --> 00:16:34,240
Speaker 2: just as I suspected, I single handily dominated the first

337
00:16:34,280 --> 00:16:37,720
Speaker 2: game against two strangers and I didn't even lose a

338
00:16:37,760 --> 00:16:38,400
Speaker 2: single cup.

339
00:16:38,480 --> 00:16:38,960
Speaker 1: Oh.

340
00:16:38,960 --> 00:16:41,640
Speaker 2: However, because I don't drink, I'd never played beer pong,

341
00:16:41,680 --> 00:16:43,400
Speaker 2: and I don't know the rules. I thought the game

342
00:16:43,520 --> 00:16:46,760
Speaker 2: was sort of prefunctory and the main purpose was to drink.

343
00:16:46,800 --> 00:16:49,920
Speaker 2: So in a doubly stupid move, I said, don't worry, Svetlana.

344
00:16:50,160 --> 00:16:53,880
Speaker 2: I've got this, and I down all it cuffs of booze.

345
00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:56,880
Speaker 2: Turns out it wasn't beer, it was shots of a

346
00:16:56,920 --> 00:17:00,000
Speaker 2: hard liquor. But now I didn't care. I was right

347
00:17:00,120 --> 00:17:03,640
Speaker 2: in the uphouric athletes, high from my demanding victory of

348
00:17:03,680 --> 00:17:05,879
Speaker 2: throwing a ping pong ball across the table.

349
00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:07,880
Speaker 1: These guys' words are physically painful.

350
00:17:08,000 --> 00:17:10,879
Speaker 2: I know who else wants to get their ass kicked,

351
00:17:10,960 --> 00:17:13,960
Speaker 2: I said across the room. Spelana was starting to warm

352
00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:16,800
Speaker 2: up a bit and quietly chuckled. Two more people stepped

353
00:17:16,880 --> 00:17:19,639
Speaker 2: up in quick order. I dominated that game too, and

354
00:17:19,760 --> 00:17:23,040
Speaker 2: lost only one cup ooh. After the game's Fitlana saw

355
00:17:23,040 --> 00:17:24,720
Speaker 2: me reaching for the cup and grabbed my arm, but

356
00:17:24,800 --> 00:17:27,960
Speaker 2: I said, don't worry, Spetlana, I got this and down

357
00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:30,399
Speaker 2: all of my cups again. No, I could hear people

358
00:17:30,480 --> 00:17:33,000
Speaker 2: snickering and speaking under their breath, but I ignored it.

359
00:17:33,040 --> 00:17:36,160
Speaker 2: Come on, who else wants a piece of maid? That'space

360
00:17:36,240 --> 00:17:39,000
Speaker 2: of this spicy may ball, I had taunted, feeling ten

361
00:17:39,080 --> 00:17:41,560
Speaker 2: feet tall and bulletproof. No, no, no, you should just

362
00:17:41,760 --> 00:17:45,359
Speaker 2: sit down for a bit, warns Fetlana. Oh hell no,

363
00:17:45,760 --> 00:17:49,240
Speaker 2: you and me are going right to the top, I said, Oh,

364
00:17:49,359 --> 00:17:51,320
Speaker 2: I just think you should take a break for who

365
00:17:51,359 --> 00:17:56,639
Speaker 2: watch dog get storm? I interrupted. Two more strangers stepped up,

366
00:17:56,680 --> 00:17:59,040
Speaker 2: and I narrowly won the third game, not quite as

367
00:17:59,080 --> 00:18:02,000
Speaker 2: smoothly or em Brest, but I won. Before she could

368
00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:05,080
Speaker 2: stop me, I downed all of her cups again. She

369
00:18:05,200 --> 00:18:07,760
Speaker 2: looked a bit amused and a bit concerned, but not

370
00:18:07,960 --> 00:18:10,400
Speaker 2: as uncomfortable as she had ten minutes ago. And then,

371
00:18:10,640 --> 00:18:12,879
Speaker 2: right in front center of my head, I started to

372
00:18:12,920 --> 00:18:15,840
Speaker 2: feel warm fuzzies. Hide and seek, someone shouted from the

373
00:18:15,880 --> 00:18:18,560
Speaker 2: living room. At this point, running on twenty four cups,

374
00:18:18,600 --> 00:18:21,120
Speaker 2: which must have equaled twelve to sixteen shots of hard

375
00:18:21,160 --> 00:18:23,439
Speaker 2: liquor on an empty stomach, hide and seek sounded like

376
00:18:23,480 --> 00:18:26,399
Speaker 2: a great idea. Oh god, with sixty people in a

377
00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:28,680
Speaker 2: one story house. Whatever. Someone flicks off the lights and

378
00:18:28,720 --> 00:18:31,120
Speaker 2: we all start running around like crazy people. Fit Lana

379
00:18:31,160 --> 00:18:33,240
Speaker 2: and I met abruptly at one of the door to

380
00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:35,720
Speaker 2: one of the rooms. We hear the dude, who was

381
00:18:35,800 --> 00:18:38,280
Speaker 2: it approaching, So we duck into the room, which was

382
00:18:38,400 --> 00:18:40,960
Speaker 2: painfully bare, and we were about to get caught. Sit

383
00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:43,399
Speaker 2: Lana grabs me of the sleeves and pulls me in

384
00:18:43,440 --> 00:18:45,240
Speaker 2: the closet the side of the room, and there we

385
00:18:45,280 --> 00:18:47,760
Speaker 2: sat with a full moon beaming through the window and

386
00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:50,000
Speaker 2: through the shutters in the closet door, and the soft

387
00:18:50,080 --> 00:18:52,480
Speaker 2: hum of bare naked ladies playing on the stereo in

388
00:18:52,520 --> 00:18:55,080
Speaker 2: the living room, the gentle pitcher patter of footsteps, and

389
00:18:55,119 --> 00:18:58,520
Speaker 2: the ambient giggling of hide and seekers outside. It was perfect.

390
00:18:58,600 --> 00:19:01,120
Speaker 2: She looked at me, I looked at her. She leaned forward.

391
00:19:01,240 --> 00:19:04,359
Speaker 2: I lean forward, and we kissed. It was a beautiful kiss.

392
00:19:04,440 --> 00:19:07,359
Speaker 2: I leaned back, my heart a flutter and say, Stetlana,

393
00:19:07,560 --> 00:19:09,480
Speaker 2: I just want you to know I think you're.

394
00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:12,440
Speaker 1: No. And I puke.

395
00:19:12,720 --> 00:19:16,480
Speaker 2: I puke right into Svetlana's slightly open mouth. I puke

396
00:19:16,640 --> 00:19:19,560
Speaker 2: into her effing face and into her mouth. I puke

397
00:19:19,760 --> 00:19:22,680
Speaker 2: so hard, in fact, that I almost pass out, face

398
00:19:22,760 --> 00:19:26,040
Speaker 2: down into her laundry bin. When I braced myself to

399
00:19:26,080 --> 00:19:28,239
Speaker 2: catch my balance, I look at her, and I am

400
00:19:28,280 --> 00:19:33,879
Speaker 2: now tumbling down the metaphorical water well of complete, unrecoverable intoxication,

401
00:19:34,040 --> 00:19:38,080
Speaker 2: and I make a drunken observation, ha, Setlana your shirt sweat,

402
00:19:38,320 --> 00:19:41,760
Speaker 2: just why? And then I realize what I'd done. I

403
00:19:41,840 --> 00:19:44,480
Speaker 2: realize it's my puke all over her shirts and face

404
00:19:44,520 --> 00:19:47,240
Speaker 2: and closet. I basically knock the closet doors off the

405
00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:50,760
Speaker 2: hinges and stumble into her room and scream, someone needs

406
00:19:50,800 --> 00:19:54,000
Speaker 2: to take me home right now. At least that's what

407
00:19:54,080 --> 00:19:56,439
Speaker 2: I tried to scream. I got out someone needs to

408
00:19:56,600 --> 00:20:02,240
Speaker 2: and the I puke again hard. We're spent Lana's bed, quilt, pillows,

409
00:20:02,280 --> 00:20:04,639
Speaker 2: a night table. Oh, this shit was coming out of

410
00:20:04,640 --> 00:20:06,879
Speaker 2: my mouth like it was a fire hose, and I

411
00:20:06,960 --> 00:20:10,280
Speaker 2: was trying to save City Hall. And then darkness. That's

412
00:20:10,320 --> 00:20:12,400
Speaker 2: where my memory stops. I woke up the next day

413
00:20:12,400 --> 00:20:14,640
Speaker 2: face down in my room, completely naked, with my door

414
00:20:14,640 --> 00:20:16,919
Speaker 2: wide open. When I stumbled into the living room, feeling

415
00:20:16,960 --> 00:20:19,560
Speaker 2: like someone had taken a crap inside my skull, I

416
00:20:19,600 --> 00:20:22,199
Speaker 2: saw my clothes everywhere. My roommates later told me that

417
00:20:22,240 --> 00:20:24,719
Speaker 2: someone had driven me home at about three am, and

418
00:20:24,760 --> 00:20:27,000
Speaker 2: I was slamming on our front door with my shirt

419
00:20:27,040 --> 00:20:31,480
Speaker 2: pulled over my head, shouting incoherently and basically only vowel sounds,

420
00:20:31,720 --> 00:20:38,480
Speaker 2: and set Lana's name wow. And when they opened the door,

421
00:20:38,520 --> 00:20:40,840
Speaker 2: I ripped off all my clothes and hurled them around

422
00:20:40,840 --> 00:20:43,320
Speaker 2: the house like a Tasmanian devil. Pants were on the fridge,

423
00:20:43,320 --> 00:20:45,280
Speaker 2: shirt was in the stove, socks were in the sink,

424
00:20:45,280 --> 00:20:47,040
Speaker 2: and one shoe was in the garbage and the other

425
00:20:47,080 --> 00:20:49,879
Speaker 2: shoe was never accounted for. Spetlana, if you're reading this,

426
00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:52,280
Speaker 2: I'm so sorry things never worked out. And for puking

427
00:20:52,280 --> 00:20:53,720
Speaker 2: in your mouth and for punching you in the.

428
00:20:53,880 --> 00:20:57,240
Speaker 1: Like maybe one of the most painful cringey stories we've

429
00:20:57,680 --> 00:20:58,200
Speaker 1: ever heard.

430
00:20:58,320 --> 00:20:59,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, this is one for the books.

431
00:20:59,640 --> 00:21:02,280
Speaker 1: This is absolutely won for the books, and just all

432
00:21:02,280 --> 00:21:05,160
Speaker 1: of his ideas, like even starting with the like oh Ill,

433
00:21:05,160 --> 00:21:07,359
Speaker 1: like grabber lag and scare her, like who does that?

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Speaker 2: No one? No one does that. You shouldn't throw that,

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Speaker 2: but you know what he should always do?

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Speaker 1: Oh subscribe to okop, follow us on Spotify, subscribe on YouTube,

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00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:17,920
Speaker 1: follow us on big dooc and who.

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00:21:17,800 --> 00:21:19,520
Speaker 2: Want to be a real one? Support us on Patreon.

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00:21:19,560 --> 00:21:22,280
Speaker 1: That's right, Join the family. Joey Sandra Casey s Aphorious

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00:21:22,320 --> 00:21:25,480
Speaker 1: to v NA Mohammed, Amanda Will Desiree, Keegan, and Kathy

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00:21:25,560 --> 00:21:26,520
Speaker 1: Quigley see us soon.