1 00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:02,560 Speaker 1: Hey, guys, I'm kaylie sure, And this is too much 2 00:00:02,600 --> 00:00:19,160 Speaker 1: to say questions it out to you. So I always 3 00:00:19,160 --> 00:00:21,040 Speaker 1: my headphones when I do this podcast, just to make 4 00:00:21,040 --> 00:00:23,959 Speaker 1: sure nothing's happening. But I can hear my voice the 5 00:00:24,000 --> 00:00:27,880 Speaker 1: way that you guys are in my headphones, and I 6 00:00:27,920 --> 00:00:30,440 Speaker 1: can't tell if my voice is really low or it's 7 00:00:30,520 --> 00:00:33,680 Speaker 1: just raspy. But what's so weird is I sing really 8 00:00:33,800 --> 00:00:36,080 Speaker 1: high and have this like kind of like breathy voice 9 00:00:36,080 --> 00:00:38,879 Speaker 1: and then I'm like sounds like a chain smoker and 10 00:00:38,960 --> 00:00:43,480 Speaker 1: not like the E D M kind anyways, just having 11 00:00:43,479 --> 00:00:46,800 Speaker 1: a little bit of a moment where I'm observing. Um, 12 00:00:46,920 --> 00:00:48,599 Speaker 1: I don't know, it's so weird, Like hearing the sound 13 00:00:48,640 --> 00:00:51,839 Speaker 1: of your own voice is so bizarre because it just 14 00:00:51,880 --> 00:00:53,720 Speaker 1: doesn't sound the same way to you as it does 15 00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:55,680 Speaker 1: to other people. And a lot of people hate the 16 00:00:55,680 --> 00:00:57,840 Speaker 1: sound of their voice. I have a song called the 17 00:00:57,880 --> 00:01:03,000 Speaker 1: Sound of my Voice Anyway High, Happy New Year. I'm 18 00:01:03,040 --> 00:01:06,280 Speaker 1: recording this on Monday, January four, which is like the 19 00:01:06,319 --> 00:01:08,360 Speaker 1: first Monday of the New year, where everybody is at 20 00:01:08,400 --> 00:01:11,920 Speaker 1: work and you know, back from vacation. The music industry 21 00:01:11,959 --> 00:01:16,040 Speaker 1: is so weird because it just shuts down after Thanksgiving, 22 00:01:16,360 --> 00:01:18,479 Speaker 1: like people are still going to work, but it's all 23 00:01:18,520 --> 00:01:22,880 Speaker 1: wrap up stuff. Nobody's starting any new projects, nobody's signing anybody, 24 00:01:23,000 --> 00:01:25,840 Speaker 1: very few people are releasing things. I had a busy 25 00:01:25,880 --> 00:01:28,840 Speaker 1: beginning of December because of my album released, but it's 26 00:01:28,840 --> 00:01:32,039 Speaker 1: still just been like really quiet, and I tried to 27 00:01:32,040 --> 00:01:34,560 Speaker 1: embrace that over the holidays and really just like take 28 00:01:34,600 --> 00:01:37,720 Speaker 1: the time to set my phone down and not find 29 00:01:37,760 --> 00:01:40,640 Speaker 1: it for another twelve hours. And it was really great 30 00:01:40,640 --> 00:01:42,280 Speaker 1: and I had a really good time. But I have 31 00:01:42,800 --> 00:01:45,720 Speaker 1: so much New Year's energy right now. I've scheduled so 32 00:01:45,720 --> 00:01:48,960 Speaker 1: many things I wrote in my planner, I got up 33 00:01:49,000 --> 00:01:52,520 Speaker 1: super early. I've done so much and it's like mid afternoon, 34 00:01:52,600 --> 00:01:56,000 Speaker 1: like hell, yes, I'm ready to go. So this week's 35 00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:58,520 Speaker 1: episode is going to be all about my tattoos, the 36 00:01:58,520 --> 00:02:01,440 Speaker 1: stories behind them. A lot of him I've never shared, 37 00:02:01,600 --> 00:02:04,240 Speaker 1: not for any particular reason, but it's just haven't had 38 00:02:04,240 --> 00:02:06,440 Speaker 1: a reason too And that's what's fun about a podcast, 39 00:02:06,480 --> 00:02:09,239 Speaker 1: as I get to tell you guys too much. This 40 00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:13,239 Speaker 1: was a request from Lauren Alex Hooper, who is um 41 00:02:13,280 --> 00:02:15,600 Speaker 1: a singer songwriter from the UK. Just played songs of 42 00:02:15,639 --> 00:02:18,960 Speaker 1: her jets before. She's really awesome and I was taking 43 00:02:19,080 --> 00:02:22,240 Speaker 1: requests for podcast episode ideas and she asked me to 44 00:02:22,280 --> 00:02:24,520 Speaker 1: do one on my tattoos and talk about it because 45 00:02:24,560 --> 00:02:28,040 Speaker 1: she's been thinking about getting one, and it's um something 46 00:02:28,080 --> 00:02:30,680 Speaker 1: that's really important to me. I love the stories behind these. 47 00:02:30,919 --> 00:02:32,960 Speaker 1: Some of them don't have stories at well, but I'm 48 00:02:32,960 --> 00:02:37,120 Speaker 1: going to share with you my experiences with tattoos. I 49 00:02:37,200 --> 00:02:41,320 Speaker 1: got my first tattoo when I was eighteen. I think 50 00:02:41,440 --> 00:02:44,880 Speaker 1: I was about to turn nineteen, and I had always 51 00:02:44,880 --> 00:02:49,440 Speaker 1: wanted one. My parents definitely weren't crazy about them. My 52 00:02:49,560 --> 00:02:54,400 Speaker 1: dad has a old tattoo that he got back in 53 00:02:54,520 --> 00:02:56,520 Speaker 1: Germany when he was like in sixth grade, and it's 54 00:02:56,520 --> 00:02:58,040 Speaker 1: like a stick and poke and you can still see 55 00:02:58,040 --> 00:03:00,120 Speaker 1: it on his arm and it's just like a giant G. 56 00:03:00,800 --> 00:03:03,680 Speaker 1: And over the years he's told me it stands for 57 00:03:03,720 --> 00:03:06,440 Speaker 1: different things. First it was Germany, then it was girls. 58 00:03:07,120 --> 00:03:09,760 Speaker 1: We'll never know what the G really stands for. But 59 00:03:10,200 --> 00:03:12,720 Speaker 1: he had a bad experience of tattoos. That's his only one, 60 00:03:12,760 --> 00:03:16,320 Speaker 1: and he was like, don't get them, and obviously, me 61 00:03:16,440 --> 00:03:19,280 Speaker 1: being me, I didn't listen. So I got a tattoo 62 00:03:19,320 --> 00:03:22,280 Speaker 1: at eighteen. My first tattoo is on my rib cage. 63 00:03:22,320 --> 00:03:24,280 Speaker 1: Which is one of the most painful areas you can 64 00:03:24,280 --> 00:03:27,000 Speaker 1: get your rib cage and your foot, and I got 65 00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:29,200 Speaker 1: like a big one with shading. It's still one of 66 00:03:29,200 --> 00:03:33,200 Speaker 1: my biggest tattoos, and it was really painful, but I 67 00:03:33,240 --> 00:03:35,600 Speaker 1: think that it's set my expectations for tattoos, where like 68 00:03:35,640 --> 00:03:38,200 Speaker 1: every other one I ever got didn't hurt that bad, 69 00:03:38,320 --> 00:03:41,800 Speaker 1: So that's really good. People always ask about the pain levels, 70 00:03:41,800 --> 00:03:44,119 Speaker 1: and I think that that's obviously a natural concern going 71 00:03:44,160 --> 00:03:47,600 Speaker 1: in and getting one. Another question I get asked and 72 00:03:48,400 --> 00:03:51,720 Speaker 1: people wonder about, is what happens if the tattoo artist 73 00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:55,960 Speaker 1: messes up very valid. I've seen a lot of really 74 00:03:56,080 --> 00:04:02,440 Speaker 1: terrible tattoos online and um in person. There's a there's 75 00:04:02,480 --> 00:04:04,760 Speaker 1: a guy in my hometown who has a portrait tattoo 76 00:04:05,120 --> 00:04:08,320 Speaker 1: of Bill Belichick and Tom Brady on his back and 77 00:04:08,560 --> 00:04:13,480 Speaker 1: it just, I mean, it's very lifelike. But I just 78 00:04:13,600 --> 00:04:15,680 Speaker 1: I think about that all the time. He was like 79 00:04:15,680 --> 00:04:17,479 Speaker 1: on the local news for it. I think about that 80 00:04:17,520 --> 00:04:18,960 Speaker 1: all the time. I don't know if I'm going to 81 00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:20,400 Speaker 1: go so far as to call it a bad tattoo, 82 00:04:20,440 --> 00:04:24,680 Speaker 1: considering it's well done, But you know, there's there's a 83 00:04:24,680 --> 00:04:27,000 Speaker 1: wide spectrum of the type of tattoos you can get, 84 00:04:28,080 --> 00:04:30,000 Speaker 1: and um, then there's just bad ones because they're like 85 00:04:30,040 --> 00:04:32,839 Speaker 1: messed up and somebody made a mistake. And there's a 86 00:04:32,880 --> 00:04:36,400 Speaker 1: couple I have that. The closer I look, I find 87 00:04:36,480 --> 00:04:40,479 Speaker 1: little things like just a line goes over another line, 88 00:04:40,520 --> 00:04:43,839 Speaker 1: like by like a literal hair. But that's the nature 89 00:04:43,920 --> 00:04:48,760 Speaker 1: of anything, like that's the nature of a painter or 90 00:04:48,800 --> 00:04:50,680 Speaker 1: even a photographer, Like there's always going to be like 91 00:04:50,680 --> 00:04:53,440 Speaker 1: a little bit of something wrong. So it doesn't bother 92 00:04:53,520 --> 00:04:56,359 Speaker 1: me personally. I think that the most important thing you 93 00:04:56,360 --> 00:04:59,320 Speaker 1: can do to avoid that is go to a reputable shop, 94 00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:02,760 Speaker 1: look at your tattoo artist ahead of time. Make sure 95 00:05:03,040 --> 00:05:06,159 Speaker 1: you know what to expect from their work, because there's 96 00:05:06,160 --> 00:05:08,680 Speaker 1: going to be some artists whose style just doesn't match 97 00:05:08,720 --> 00:05:10,680 Speaker 1: what you want. Like if there's somebody who does like 98 00:05:10,720 --> 00:05:13,919 Speaker 1: the old school like sailor tattoos like the heart that 99 00:05:13,960 --> 00:05:15,880 Speaker 1: says mom with the arrow through it, or like the 100 00:05:15,920 --> 00:05:19,920 Speaker 1: sparrow tattoos, he's probably not going to want to do 101 00:05:20,000 --> 00:05:22,800 Speaker 1: your infinity sign on your lower back, you know, So 102 00:05:23,080 --> 00:05:25,280 Speaker 1: make sure you find an artist who specializes in what 103 00:05:25,360 --> 00:05:27,440 Speaker 1: you do. And also just know they're all going to 104 00:05:27,560 --> 00:05:28,599 Speaker 1: laugh at you. If you go in there and not 105 00:05:28,880 --> 00:05:31,640 Speaker 1: like ask for that, Like I've gotten made fun of 106 00:05:31,680 --> 00:05:34,320 Speaker 1: in a tattoo shop for whatever I've requested, And that's 107 00:05:34,320 --> 00:05:36,960 Speaker 1: also just part of it. Let them be snobby. They're 108 00:05:36,960 --> 00:05:40,039 Speaker 1: really good at their jobs, they just hate doing infinity signs. 109 00:05:40,960 --> 00:05:43,159 Speaker 1: Another question I get asked is well, what if you 110 00:05:43,160 --> 00:05:46,880 Speaker 1: regret them when you're older? And yeah, I mean, obviously 111 00:05:46,920 --> 00:05:49,080 Speaker 1: I've thought about that. These are things that are forever. 112 00:05:49,240 --> 00:05:53,880 Speaker 1: But I am a commitment fogue and I think I 113 00:05:53,880 --> 00:05:56,919 Speaker 1: get tattoos to force myself to commit to something, which 114 00:05:56,960 --> 00:05:59,560 Speaker 1: is an interesting way to handle it. But I like 115 00:05:59,640 --> 00:06:03,479 Speaker 1: the idea of carrying these with me forever and having 116 00:06:03,520 --> 00:06:05,960 Speaker 1: them represent different points in my life. And to me 117 00:06:06,160 --> 00:06:09,800 Speaker 1: it's less like is this tattoo relevant to my life 118 00:06:09,880 --> 00:06:13,159 Speaker 1: right now or my preferences or my style. No, but 119 00:06:13,360 --> 00:06:15,279 Speaker 1: it's a part of who I am. And I forget 120 00:06:15,320 --> 00:06:16,800 Speaker 1: what book it was, but I read one when I 121 00:06:16,839 --> 00:06:19,040 Speaker 1: was younger and it said we age like an onion, 122 00:06:19,320 --> 00:06:21,960 Speaker 1: which just like layer after layer after layer, but like, 123 00:06:22,040 --> 00:06:26,200 Speaker 1: you're still eighteen, even at twenty six, You're still six, 124 00:06:26,320 --> 00:06:28,799 Speaker 1: even at twenty six, you have all these different ages 125 00:06:28,839 --> 00:06:30,640 Speaker 1: inside of you. And I think tattoos are a cool 126 00:06:30,640 --> 00:06:34,520 Speaker 1: representation of that. So when I look down at my arms, 127 00:06:34,560 --> 00:06:37,080 Speaker 1: I'm like, wow, that was from the summer of eighteen, 128 00:06:37,240 --> 00:06:41,039 Speaker 1: and it's immediate nostalgia just looking at this art that 129 00:06:41,080 --> 00:06:43,360 Speaker 1: I have on me, and I really really enjoy that. 130 00:06:43,560 --> 00:06:47,320 Speaker 1: And I don't have any tattoos I truly regret. So 131 00:06:47,520 --> 00:06:50,080 Speaker 1: I had to write out my tattoos because I have 132 00:06:50,240 --> 00:06:53,479 Speaker 1: enough now that I've lost track, and they're just I 133 00:06:53,520 --> 00:06:54,960 Speaker 1: get a lot of little ones, like I don't have 134 00:06:55,000 --> 00:06:57,440 Speaker 1: any like big sleeves or anything like that. I have 135 00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:01,560 Speaker 1: probably like three that are bigger than you know, like 136 00:07:01,640 --> 00:07:04,479 Speaker 1: probably the size of my palm, maybe a little smaller. 137 00:07:05,400 --> 00:07:07,120 Speaker 1: I like, I like the small tattoo thing, like I 138 00:07:07,160 --> 00:07:10,000 Speaker 1: think Julia Michael's tattoos are so cute because it's just 139 00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:12,400 Speaker 1: like a bunch of little ones everywhere and it's very cool. 140 00:07:12,800 --> 00:07:14,560 Speaker 1: But I had to think hard and like look in 141 00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:17,240 Speaker 1: the mirror and be like, am I forgetting a tattoo? 142 00:07:17,520 --> 00:07:19,600 Speaker 1: Do I have a random one somewhere that I'm forgetting about. 143 00:07:19,720 --> 00:07:20,960 Speaker 1: I have one on the back of my neck that 144 00:07:20,960 --> 00:07:24,240 Speaker 1: I always forget about. So I had to do some 145 00:07:24,280 --> 00:07:27,920 Speaker 1: real research on these. But these are my tattoos. My 146 00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:30,360 Speaker 1: first one, like I said, was on my ribcage and 147 00:07:31,080 --> 00:07:35,400 Speaker 1: it is a drawing that I did myself, and it 148 00:07:35,560 --> 00:07:40,680 Speaker 1: is based off of a worship song that helped you 149 00:07:40,720 --> 00:07:43,600 Speaker 1: when I was in a really tough place, and it's 150 00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:48,160 Speaker 1: normally matched up with them Amazing Grace, but it's my 151 00:07:48,240 --> 00:07:50,360 Speaker 1: chains are gone, have been set free my Christ, my 152 00:07:50,440 --> 00:07:56,000 Speaker 1: Savior will rescue me. And I got chains that are 153 00:07:56,080 --> 00:07:59,440 Speaker 1: broken in the shape of the eating disorder recovery symbol, 154 00:07:59,440 --> 00:08:01,560 Speaker 1: which is like half a heart and then a line 155 00:08:02,560 --> 00:08:04,160 Speaker 1: on the outside of it. It's kind of like an 156 00:08:04,160 --> 00:08:06,360 Speaker 1: opened up heart, I guess, and so it's chains and 157 00:08:06,400 --> 00:08:08,360 Speaker 1: then around the edges that says my chains are gone, 158 00:08:09,320 --> 00:08:11,760 Speaker 1: which was really important to me at the time. And 159 00:08:11,800 --> 00:08:14,680 Speaker 1: I think that, you know, there's there's no time in 160 00:08:14,720 --> 00:08:16,240 Speaker 1: my life I'm ever going to look at that and 161 00:08:16,320 --> 00:08:19,600 Speaker 1: not have it be important to me, Like is it 162 00:08:19,720 --> 00:08:22,680 Speaker 1: my favorite tattoo? Stylistically, do we wish that I had 163 00:08:22,720 --> 00:08:27,120 Speaker 1: gotten it like a little smaller maybe, But I don't know. 164 00:08:27,160 --> 00:08:29,400 Speaker 1: It's just such an important reminder And for me, I 165 00:08:29,440 --> 00:08:31,240 Speaker 1: got it when I was eighteen, and that was when 166 00:08:31,360 --> 00:08:34,679 Speaker 1: I really first started to go into recovery from a 167 00:08:34,720 --> 00:08:39,040 Speaker 1: eating disorder. So it just kind of immortalized a very 168 00:08:39,080 --> 00:08:42,640 Speaker 1: important time for me. And so because of that, I'm 169 00:08:42,640 --> 00:08:44,720 Speaker 1: always going to look back at that tattoo and and 170 00:08:45,120 --> 00:08:48,880 Speaker 1: love it. The second one I got was kind of random. 171 00:08:48,960 --> 00:08:51,280 Speaker 1: It is an arrow on the back of my neck. 172 00:08:51,559 --> 00:08:54,719 Speaker 1: I I think I saw something on Pinterest. I was 173 00:08:54,760 --> 00:08:56,520 Speaker 1: like nineteen at the time, so I think I saw 174 00:08:56,559 --> 00:08:59,360 Speaker 1: something on Pinterest and it was like an arrow has 175 00:08:59,400 --> 00:09:01,719 Speaker 1: to be pulled awkward before it can shoot forward, and 176 00:09:01,880 --> 00:09:04,720 Speaker 1: you know, that's a really cool sentiment. But everybody else 177 00:09:04,800 --> 00:09:07,520 Speaker 1: had that sentiment from interest as well, So that was 178 00:09:07,559 --> 00:09:09,160 Speaker 1: one of the ones where the tattoo artists kind of 179 00:09:09,200 --> 00:09:10,920 Speaker 1: rolled their eyes. But it's cute. It's on the back 180 00:09:10,920 --> 00:09:12,959 Speaker 1: of my neck. You never see it, um, but when 181 00:09:12,960 --> 00:09:14,400 Speaker 1: I put my hair up in a ponytail, it's kind 182 00:09:14,400 --> 00:09:17,360 Speaker 1: of fun. The third one was my first big one 183 00:09:17,440 --> 00:09:20,080 Speaker 1: because I could hide both of those. But I got 184 00:09:20,120 --> 00:09:25,160 Speaker 1: this one when I was probably twenty one and I 185 00:09:25,200 --> 00:09:27,200 Speaker 1: had been working at a corporate job. I worked front 186 00:09:27,240 --> 00:09:31,480 Speaker 1: desk and concierge at a four star hotel, which I 187 00:09:31,520 --> 00:09:33,680 Speaker 1: think might be worse than five stars because it's like, 188 00:09:33,679 --> 00:09:36,880 Speaker 1: I don't know, it's just like always trying to overcompensate 189 00:09:36,920 --> 00:09:40,560 Speaker 1: for that one star that it's missing. And I've worked 190 00:09:40,559 --> 00:09:42,360 Speaker 1: some really shitty jobs, like I worked at a hot 191 00:09:42,400 --> 00:09:46,520 Speaker 1: dog stand and I passed out flyers in short shorts 192 00:09:46,520 --> 00:09:48,679 Speaker 1: to get people to go to this bar on Broadway. 193 00:09:49,160 --> 00:09:51,000 Speaker 1: And I worked at a clothing store where I had 194 00:09:51,040 --> 00:09:55,560 Speaker 1: to deal with Karen's all the time. And this was Oh. 195 00:09:55,640 --> 00:09:57,600 Speaker 1: I literally had a job picking up dog shit at 196 00:09:57,600 --> 00:10:00,920 Speaker 1: one time. But the worst one was this because I 197 00:10:01,000 --> 00:10:04,320 Speaker 1: was good at it, and that kind of scared me 198 00:10:04,400 --> 00:10:07,120 Speaker 1: because I was doing really well, and you know, I 199 00:10:07,400 --> 00:10:09,480 Speaker 1: had gotten a raise and I was I was really 200 00:10:09,480 --> 00:10:11,200 Speaker 1: good at it, and I liked it, but it was 201 00:10:11,240 --> 00:10:13,439 Speaker 1: so time consuming. I didn't have time to do music. 202 00:10:13,720 --> 00:10:15,640 Speaker 1: And this was in Nashville, So I was like, I 203 00:10:15,720 --> 00:10:17,440 Speaker 1: moved here to do music. I didn't move here to 204 00:10:18,080 --> 00:10:20,640 Speaker 1: work all day and then come home at eleven thirty 205 00:10:20,640 --> 00:10:24,200 Speaker 1: and be exhausted and have money in my bank account 206 00:10:24,200 --> 00:10:27,680 Speaker 1: but not have done anything related to music that week. 207 00:10:28,160 --> 00:10:31,520 Speaker 1: So I started singing at other hotels and I was 208 00:10:31,559 --> 00:10:34,120 Speaker 1: able to transition to just doing that full time. And 209 00:10:34,120 --> 00:10:35,640 Speaker 1: so for the first time in my life, I was 210 00:10:35,679 --> 00:10:38,440 Speaker 1: a full time musician. I was just playing shows. I 211 00:10:38,440 --> 00:10:40,440 Speaker 1: mean they were like three to four hour cover gigs. 212 00:10:40,480 --> 00:10:44,160 Speaker 1: But I loved it, and I never wanted to work 213 00:10:44,160 --> 00:10:48,520 Speaker 1: in the corporate world ever again, because I know, given 214 00:10:48,559 --> 00:10:53,240 Speaker 1: like my achiever tendencies, I liked being good at it, 215 00:10:53,360 --> 00:10:55,760 Speaker 1: and I know that I could like go back to 216 00:10:55,840 --> 00:10:59,520 Speaker 1: that career and enjoy it and lose focus, you know, 217 00:10:59,559 --> 00:11:01,200 Speaker 1: like that. I felt that way at the time. Obviously, 218 00:11:01,200 --> 00:11:04,240 Speaker 1: now I couldn't. I mean, I'm fully on board, and 219 00:11:04,280 --> 00:11:05,960 Speaker 1: I was fully on board them, but like you'd have 220 00:11:06,080 --> 00:11:08,280 Speaker 1: to feed yourself, you know, and I wasn't making anything 221 00:11:08,280 --> 00:11:11,520 Speaker 1: off music. So I thought this immediately after I quit 222 00:11:11,559 --> 00:11:13,720 Speaker 1: the job, because I was like, I'm going to ensure 223 00:11:13,760 --> 00:11:15,720 Speaker 1: that I can never work in the corporate world again. 224 00:11:15,840 --> 00:11:18,360 Speaker 1: Tattoo on my lower arm. You could see it through 225 00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:20,880 Speaker 1: the uniform. I was like, no, I'm getting it. So 226 00:11:21,400 --> 00:11:24,560 Speaker 1: I have a big rose. Always loved roses. Um my 227 00:11:24,679 --> 00:11:27,000 Speaker 1: grandma and my mom really loved them. And I got 228 00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:29,440 Speaker 1: a really cool, like old school one, and my friend 229 00:11:29,480 --> 00:11:31,720 Speaker 1: actually did it up in Maine, which was awesome. She 230 00:11:31,760 --> 00:11:34,959 Speaker 1: did a great job, and I just love it. It 231 00:11:35,000 --> 00:11:37,440 Speaker 1: doesn't mean a whole lot, but to me, it's a 232 00:11:37,480 --> 00:11:40,320 Speaker 1: reminder of getting to do music for a living because 233 00:11:40,320 --> 00:11:45,200 Speaker 1: that's been my dream forever. Alright, Number four is my 234 00:11:45,240 --> 00:11:49,600 Speaker 1: worst one for sure. Um So, I went to church 235 00:11:49,640 --> 00:11:53,400 Speaker 1: camp growing up and our theme song was blue Water, 236 00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:59,080 Speaker 1: Big Sky Bible Camp and MATTAPANI boo a big scatter 237 00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:01,440 Speaker 1: pana no no, no, I'm not like, I'm not kidding. 238 00:12:01,440 --> 00:12:03,719 Speaker 1: That was the church camp theme song. But I went 239 00:12:03,760 --> 00:12:07,120 Speaker 1: from kindergarten to my senior year of high school and 240 00:12:07,120 --> 00:12:09,280 Speaker 1: it was really important. It's where I learned to play guitar. 241 00:12:09,400 --> 00:12:12,280 Speaker 1: It's where I met Ariana, one of my best friends, 242 00:12:12,800 --> 00:12:16,880 Speaker 1: and I met my other friend Elizabeth there and she's, 243 00:12:17,080 --> 00:12:20,280 Speaker 1: you know, one of my oldest friends. And we got 244 00:12:20,320 --> 00:12:23,080 Speaker 1: matching tattoos one summer when she was in Nashville's probably 245 00:12:23,120 --> 00:12:25,960 Speaker 1: like twenty two at this point, and we thought we'd 246 00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:28,920 Speaker 1: get a wave going into the sun because of you know, 247 00:12:29,040 --> 00:12:33,240 Speaker 1: blue Water, Big Sky. So if you if you're having 248 00:12:33,280 --> 00:12:35,480 Speaker 1: a hard time visualizing this, look it up on Pinterest, 249 00:12:35,520 --> 00:12:38,360 Speaker 1: because it's definitely like a popular one. I don't know 250 00:12:38,400 --> 00:12:40,480 Speaker 1: if it's just where we got it, but we got 251 00:12:40,520 --> 00:12:44,280 Speaker 1: it on the inside of our feet and it was 252 00:12:44,440 --> 00:12:46,720 Speaker 1: really painful, like I can still feel it when I 253 00:12:46,720 --> 00:12:49,160 Speaker 1: think about it. So I wouldn't recommend that spot for 254 00:12:49,200 --> 00:12:54,280 Speaker 1: that reason. Um, but it also the way it came out, 255 00:12:55,040 --> 00:12:59,080 Speaker 1: it kind of looks like a cherry bomb. And even 256 00:12:59,200 --> 00:13:02,920 Speaker 1: more so than that, when we'd hold them together because 257 00:13:02,960 --> 00:13:04,800 Speaker 1: we got them on opposite feet, like when her and 258 00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:06,839 Speaker 1: I would put ours next to each other, it looked 259 00:13:06,840 --> 00:13:11,480 Speaker 1: like a sixty nine. So it was did not come 260 00:13:11,480 --> 00:13:14,080 Speaker 1: out the way I intended. The tattoo artist did nothing wrong. 261 00:13:14,480 --> 00:13:17,920 Speaker 1: I just wasn't thinking. And maybe it's because I got 262 00:13:17,920 --> 00:13:21,080 Speaker 1: it too big. I don't really know, but it doesn't 263 00:13:21,080 --> 00:13:23,120 Speaker 1: bother me. It looks cute when I wear high heels, 264 00:13:23,120 --> 00:13:25,560 Speaker 1: but I think if you saw it, you would definitely 265 00:13:25,559 --> 00:13:28,920 Speaker 1: think it was a cherry bomb and not a wave 266 00:13:29,080 --> 00:13:34,079 Speaker 1: going into the sun. Actually, if you want to see it. Um. 267 00:13:34,120 --> 00:13:39,080 Speaker 1: There is this freaking website called Celebrity Feet or Wicky Feet. 268 00:13:39,120 --> 00:13:41,040 Speaker 1: I don't know. Somebody sent it to me one time, 269 00:13:41,320 --> 00:13:44,319 Speaker 1: and it's like a feet website and you rate celebrities 270 00:13:44,360 --> 00:13:49,200 Speaker 1: feet and they like upload pictures that there's pictures on 271 00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:51,720 Speaker 1: there that are from like my friends Instagram stories that 272 00:13:51,800 --> 00:13:54,600 Speaker 1: I didn't even repost, Like there's pictures on there from 273 00:13:54,600 --> 00:14:00,080 Speaker 1: when I was like seventeen, like just feat pictures and 274 00:14:00,120 --> 00:14:01,439 Speaker 1: one of them is my tattoos. If you want to 275 00:14:01,440 --> 00:14:03,199 Speaker 1: look it up, you can go see it um and 276 00:14:03,400 --> 00:14:06,480 Speaker 1: I'm proud to say, even though I'm horrified by it, 277 00:14:06,559 --> 00:14:09,080 Speaker 1: I have a five star rating. So yeah. My friend's 278 00:14:09,160 --> 00:14:11,080 Speaker 1: mom found that because she was like looking for my 279 00:14:11,120 --> 00:14:13,400 Speaker 1: website and she was like, UM, have you seen this? 280 00:14:13,440 --> 00:14:17,559 Speaker 1: And I was like, jeez, I yeah, things you don't 281 00:14:17,600 --> 00:14:19,920 Speaker 1: think about when you wanted to music for a living. 282 00:14:20,800 --> 00:14:23,320 Speaker 1: So I went a few years without getting one. Those 283 00:14:23,720 --> 00:14:26,560 Speaker 1: tattoos were between eighteen and twenty one and I had 284 00:14:26,600 --> 00:14:28,600 Speaker 1: only gotten four, so I was kind of spaced out. 285 00:14:28,640 --> 00:14:32,280 Speaker 1: Like then I went a little crazy. This is still 286 00:14:32,320 --> 00:14:33,840 Speaker 1: one of my favorite tattoos. But I have it on 287 00:14:33,880 --> 00:14:35,680 Speaker 1: the side of my wrist and it's a little lightning bowl. 288 00:14:35,720 --> 00:14:41,320 Speaker 1: And I got this the summer of I had just 289 00:14:41,680 --> 00:14:44,880 Speaker 1: gone through the beginning of that breakup that I talked 290 00:14:44,880 --> 00:14:47,320 Speaker 1: about and read about all the time. But it was big, 291 00:14:47,360 --> 00:14:52,160 Speaker 1: so you know it's going to happen, but I had 292 00:14:52,200 --> 00:14:54,040 Speaker 1: just it was when I was trying to decide if 293 00:14:54,040 --> 00:14:55,240 Speaker 1: I wanted to stay with him or not, but he 294 00:14:55,320 --> 00:14:58,160 Speaker 1: already told me that he cheated on me, and I 295 00:14:58,200 --> 00:15:00,440 Speaker 1: stayed at a friend's house that weekend because I just 296 00:15:00,440 --> 00:15:03,480 Speaker 1: didn't want to, you know, be around him. And my 297 00:15:03,640 --> 00:15:06,400 Speaker 1: friend Cassidy Pope asked me if I wanted to go 298 00:15:06,440 --> 00:15:09,200 Speaker 1: see a Jimmy World concert with her, and I was like, 299 00:15:09,320 --> 00:15:12,080 Speaker 1: oh my god, I'm so excited, and I like, I 300 00:15:12,240 --> 00:15:14,160 Speaker 1: was getting ready to go, and then I decided I 301 00:15:14,160 --> 00:15:17,160 Speaker 1: wanted to get a tattoo. And I had just started 302 00:15:17,160 --> 00:15:19,800 Speaker 1: playing the Opry and the second time I ever played, 303 00:15:20,960 --> 00:15:24,840 Speaker 1: I had noticed one of the guitar players guitar straps 304 00:15:25,200 --> 00:15:27,800 Speaker 1: and it's um one of the one of the guys 305 00:15:27,800 --> 00:15:29,760 Speaker 1: I'm trying to remember. I remember his name, but I 306 00:15:29,760 --> 00:15:31,560 Speaker 1: don't remember which one gave it to me, but remember 307 00:15:31,560 --> 00:15:33,800 Speaker 1: of the opera band. He had this really cool pink 308 00:15:33,800 --> 00:15:35,880 Speaker 1: strap with a lightning bolt on it. And I was like, 309 00:15:35,880 --> 00:15:38,400 Speaker 1: oh my god, I love that guitar strap, Like where'd 310 00:15:38,400 --> 00:15:41,560 Speaker 1: you get it? And he was like, well, at the Opry, 311 00:15:41,640 --> 00:15:45,120 Speaker 1: we only have pink guitar straps and capos and whatnot 312 00:15:45,200 --> 00:15:49,080 Speaker 1: because nobody ever steals them because it's really noticeable. So 313 00:15:49,120 --> 00:15:50,680 Speaker 1: if you guys are ever watching a video from the 314 00:15:50,680 --> 00:15:53,240 Speaker 1: Opery and you see an artist using a pink guitar 315 00:15:53,240 --> 00:15:56,200 Speaker 1: strap or something, it's because they forgot There's which is 316 00:15:56,240 --> 00:15:58,360 Speaker 1: so funny, so like I think like Hunter Hayes has 317 00:15:58,440 --> 00:16:01,840 Speaker 1: used one and um daunchlits and it's just it's a 318 00:16:01,840 --> 00:16:05,600 Speaker 1: really funny little inside insider info at the Opry. But 319 00:16:05,680 --> 00:16:08,760 Speaker 1: I really loved it, and he was like, well do 320 00:16:08,800 --> 00:16:10,800 Speaker 1: you want it? And I was like, are you kidding me? 321 00:16:11,120 --> 00:16:13,120 Speaker 1: And so he gave me the guitar strap and it 322 00:16:13,200 --> 00:16:16,280 Speaker 1: has Opry band written and sharpie on the back. It's 323 00:16:16,320 --> 00:16:18,680 Speaker 1: one of my most prized possessions. I use it all 324 00:16:18,720 --> 00:16:20,680 Speaker 1: the time, and I started doing tick marks every time 325 00:16:20,720 --> 00:16:23,120 Speaker 1: I played the Opery, which I'm very excited to tell 326 00:16:23,200 --> 00:16:26,640 Speaker 1: you I'm playing again on January nine for the first 327 00:16:26,680 --> 00:16:29,000 Speaker 1: time in like a year because obviously they've been closed. 328 00:16:29,400 --> 00:16:31,440 Speaker 1: I'm so so excited to be back and to see 329 00:16:31,440 --> 00:16:33,720 Speaker 1: those guys, and I will definitely be using my guitar strap. 330 00:16:34,360 --> 00:16:37,280 Speaker 1: So I was like super excited for the Jimmy World concert. 331 00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:38,880 Speaker 1: Super wound up and I was like, I'm gonna get 332 00:16:38,880 --> 00:16:42,120 Speaker 1: a lightning bolt tattoo because fun, this guy, like he 333 00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:44,120 Speaker 1: might have broken my heart and I might feel like 334 00:16:44,160 --> 00:16:45,760 Speaker 1: my world's upside down, but I get to play the 335 00:16:45,760 --> 00:16:49,360 Speaker 1: Opry and I want to remind myself that I get 336 00:16:49,400 --> 00:16:51,360 Speaker 1: to do that ship because when you're going through something 337 00:16:51,400 --> 00:16:54,400 Speaker 1: really depressing, it affects every aspect of your life, and 338 00:16:54,760 --> 00:16:57,480 Speaker 1: you can very quickly fall into a oh my god, 339 00:16:57,920 --> 00:17:00,160 Speaker 1: like my life is so hard, my dreams are never 340 00:17:00,240 --> 00:17:02,200 Speaker 1: going to come true, and it's like, no, no, no no, no, girl, 341 00:17:02,240 --> 00:17:04,960 Speaker 1: you just wasted a long time on an asshole. It's 342 00:17:05,000 --> 00:17:06,919 Speaker 1: actually going to get a lot better from here. So 343 00:17:06,960 --> 00:17:09,159 Speaker 1: I wanted to remind myself of why I do what 344 00:17:09,200 --> 00:17:12,479 Speaker 1: I do and that everything was gonna be okay. So 345 00:17:12,520 --> 00:17:14,440 Speaker 1: I got a brand new tattoo. Then I got to 346 00:17:14,520 --> 00:17:17,560 Speaker 1: go see Jimmy World with Cassidy and just like dance 347 00:17:17,640 --> 00:17:19,719 Speaker 1: my ass off, and that was such an important night 348 00:17:19,720 --> 00:17:23,560 Speaker 1: and I think it really helped me see that the 349 00:17:23,600 --> 00:17:25,200 Speaker 1: breakup wasn't going to be the end of the world. 350 00:17:25,200 --> 00:17:41,080 Speaker 1: There was still going to be great days. And then, 351 00:17:41,119 --> 00:17:44,320 Speaker 1: like literally a couple of months later, it was my 352 00:17:44,400 --> 00:17:46,160 Speaker 1: birthday and I was like, I want to get a tattoo. 353 00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:49,399 Speaker 1: So me and my best friend Candy Carpenter went in 354 00:17:49,440 --> 00:17:52,919 Speaker 1: and I got a Nirvana smiley on the back of 355 00:17:52,960 --> 00:17:55,680 Speaker 1: my arm. My first band ever was in Nirvanna cover band. 356 00:17:55,760 --> 00:18:01,560 Speaker 1: I've always always loved them. They're just Kirkos incredible and 357 00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:05,240 Speaker 1: I love Dave Krol and Christmas novasly like is still 358 00:18:05,480 --> 00:18:07,720 Speaker 1: like they did that reunion thing like last year and 359 00:18:07,720 --> 00:18:09,840 Speaker 1: it was amazing. But he's like a politician, which is 360 00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:12,680 Speaker 1: so bad. Us. I'm just a really big fan. I 361 00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:15,400 Speaker 1: love Pat smir. He was in Germs, which is one 362 00:18:15,440 --> 00:18:18,040 Speaker 1: of my favorite punk bands. So it's just Nirvan is 363 00:18:18,040 --> 00:18:20,560 Speaker 1: a very important band to me and I, you know, 364 00:18:20,720 --> 00:18:22,680 Speaker 1: it's like reminder of where I came from. Also it's 365 00:18:22,720 --> 00:18:25,640 Speaker 1: fun and and cute and edgy and I liked it. 366 00:18:25,760 --> 00:18:28,480 Speaker 1: So that was another breakup tattoo. And I love the 367 00:18:28,520 --> 00:18:32,919 Speaker 1: concept of a breakup tattoo. I think there's something really 368 00:18:33,880 --> 00:18:36,719 Speaker 1: I don't know. It's like it's really empowering to go 369 00:18:36,760 --> 00:18:40,000 Speaker 1: and make a forever decision when you just lost something 370 00:18:40,040 --> 00:18:42,199 Speaker 1: you thought was gonna last forever. And I actually ended 371 00:18:42,280 --> 00:18:44,639 Speaker 1: up writing a song about it with my friends Lindsay 372 00:18:44,720 --> 00:18:47,600 Speaker 1: Jackson and Phil Barton, and it's called Breakup Tattoo. And 373 00:18:47,600 --> 00:18:48,840 Speaker 1: I'm going to play a little bit of it for 374 00:18:48,880 --> 00:18:57,520 Speaker 1: you know, so I hope you guys enjoy it. This 375 00:18:57,840 --> 00:19:05,960 Speaker 1: is a prazy to begin. The only thing that all 376 00:19:06,119 --> 00:19:44,399 Speaker 1: let on the masket crying it's not like this, it's this. 377 00:19:52,520 --> 00:19:56,000 Speaker 1: I wrote that song for Open Book in August and 378 00:19:56,200 --> 00:19:57,959 Speaker 1: I didn't make the project. But it's a song I've 379 00:19:57,960 --> 00:20:00,480 Speaker 1: always really loved. It kind of reminds me of Michelle 380 00:20:00,480 --> 00:20:05,000 Speaker 1: Branch kind of those two thousand's guitar pop vibes, and 381 00:20:05,400 --> 00:20:07,600 Speaker 1: I don't know, I just really love the song. So 382 00:20:07,640 --> 00:20:10,000 Speaker 1: the next tattoo I got. These ones all just happened 383 00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:15,000 Speaker 1: really quickly, like two in were just tattoo years. So 384 00:20:15,160 --> 00:20:17,200 Speaker 1: Candy and I went in and we got a matching tattoo, 385 00:20:17,240 --> 00:20:19,720 Speaker 1: and we have an eye with a heart in the 386 00:20:19,720 --> 00:20:22,520 Speaker 1: middle instead of a pupil. And there's a quote from 387 00:20:22,880 --> 00:20:26,600 Speaker 1: The Little Prince about how the best things in life 388 00:20:26,600 --> 00:20:28,320 Speaker 1: are seen with the heart and not the eyes, and 389 00:20:28,359 --> 00:20:30,720 Speaker 1: how you should look at everything with love and and 390 00:20:30,800 --> 00:20:33,480 Speaker 1: not just see it for what it is like, see 391 00:20:33,480 --> 00:20:36,119 Speaker 1: it with love and intention behind it. So that's a 392 00:20:36,119 --> 00:20:39,320 Speaker 1: little reminder. And it's on my finger. And the fun 393 00:20:39,320 --> 00:20:41,159 Speaker 1: thing about finger tattoos is a lot of times the 394 00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:43,399 Speaker 1: artists will just let you tack them on when you 395 00:20:43,440 --> 00:20:48,280 Speaker 1: get a regular one. So I got the Nirvana smiley 396 00:20:48,280 --> 00:20:49,760 Speaker 1: and then I got like a little star and a 397 00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:52,680 Speaker 1: saturn on my finger and they'll just be like because 398 00:20:52,680 --> 00:20:54,159 Speaker 1: they don't have to change the needle because it's the 399 00:20:54,200 --> 00:20:56,760 Speaker 1: same person. So that's always a fun factor. You can 400 00:20:56,760 --> 00:21:01,080 Speaker 1: always very kindly ask your um, ask your artist, and 401 00:21:01,200 --> 00:21:03,720 Speaker 1: tipped them well. The next one I got was a 402 00:21:03,760 --> 00:21:06,480 Speaker 1: complete impulse tattoo, but it's one that's so important to me. 403 00:21:07,119 --> 00:21:12,600 Speaker 1: I was in Key West in May of nineteen. I 404 00:21:12,640 --> 00:21:16,200 Speaker 1: had just finished recording my album I had written, Angry Butterfly, 405 00:21:16,840 --> 00:21:21,800 Speaker 1: and butterflies are super important to me because my older sister, Ashley, 406 00:21:21,840 --> 00:21:24,080 Speaker 1: the one who passed away, she had a purple butterfly 407 00:21:24,080 --> 00:21:26,800 Speaker 1: tattoo and she always loved them. Like I got her 408 00:21:27,320 --> 00:21:29,960 Speaker 1: old sheets when we were younger, and because I wanted 409 00:21:29,960 --> 00:21:31,960 Speaker 1: them so bad. I think they're probably from Delia's, but 410 00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:34,480 Speaker 1: they were like blue and had butterflies all over them. 411 00:21:34,760 --> 00:21:36,440 Speaker 1: We had butterfly stuff all over the house and she 412 00:21:36,520 --> 00:21:38,920 Speaker 1: just always loved them. And I think butterflies are obviously 413 00:21:39,280 --> 00:21:42,359 Speaker 1: so symbolic and so beautiful and some of the most 414 00:21:43,000 --> 00:21:46,080 Speaker 1: insanely gorgeous things that are on this earth and just 415 00:21:46,119 --> 00:21:48,520 Speaker 1: occur naturally. Like I'm looking at this little poster that 416 00:21:48,560 --> 00:21:49,800 Speaker 1: I have in my room right now, have a bunch 417 00:21:49,800 --> 00:21:52,480 Speaker 1: of different types of butterflies, and I'm just like, holy shit, 418 00:21:52,640 --> 00:21:56,359 Speaker 1: how does that color just exist in nature? You know? Anyways, 419 00:21:56,560 --> 00:21:59,200 Speaker 1: I promise I'm not. I just really liked on her floods. 420 00:22:00,040 --> 00:22:01,480 Speaker 1: So I was in Key West and I was talking 421 00:22:01,480 --> 00:22:02,560 Speaker 1: to my friend and we were like, what if we 422 00:22:02,600 --> 00:22:04,600 Speaker 1: just want to go tattoos right now? So we go 423 00:22:04,720 --> 00:22:07,960 Speaker 1: to this tattoo's shop and I decided to get a 424 00:22:07,960 --> 00:22:12,399 Speaker 1: butterfly to commemorate angry butterfly, and um, it matches my sister, 425 00:22:12,560 --> 00:22:14,240 Speaker 1: so it's like done in the same style. It's a 426 00:22:14,280 --> 00:22:18,000 Speaker 1: little smaller, but my other sister really loves it, so 427 00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:21,240 Speaker 1: she's going to get the same one. And then when Chloe, 428 00:22:21,480 --> 00:22:25,639 Speaker 1: my sister's daughter, is old enough, we're gonna take her 429 00:22:25,640 --> 00:22:27,760 Speaker 1: and she'll go get a matching tattoo too, so we'll 430 00:22:27,760 --> 00:22:30,960 Speaker 1: all have butterflies. And that one's on my wrist. I 431 00:22:31,040 --> 00:22:33,080 Speaker 1: never wanted to get anything on my wrist unless it 432 00:22:33,119 --> 00:22:35,040 Speaker 1: was super important, because those are the ones you have 433 00:22:35,080 --> 00:22:37,399 Speaker 1: to look at the most often. And every time I 434 00:22:37,440 --> 00:22:38,960 Speaker 1: looked down at my hands, I see it and I 435 00:22:38,960 --> 00:22:42,160 Speaker 1: think of Ashley and it's so special. Oh and then 436 00:22:42,480 --> 00:22:45,840 Speaker 1: one time I was hiking with some friends and we 437 00:22:45,840 --> 00:22:48,240 Speaker 1: were sitting there and we saw a bunch of butterflies 438 00:22:48,240 --> 00:22:50,359 Speaker 1: and they were so pretty and we're sitting there and 439 00:22:50,400 --> 00:22:53,000 Speaker 1: one of them like landed on my friend and then 440 00:22:54,160 --> 00:22:58,040 Speaker 1: it went over and jumped to me and landed right 441 00:22:58,160 --> 00:23:01,320 Speaker 1: on my tattoo, like directly on it, and it was purple, 442 00:23:01,680 --> 00:23:04,600 Speaker 1: and it just stayed there and it was the coolest 443 00:23:04,640 --> 00:23:09,800 Speaker 1: thing ever. And it's really common for, you know, people 444 00:23:09,840 --> 00:23:12,919 Speaker 1: to talk about how if you love someone and they 445 00:23:12,960 --> 00:23:15,040 Speaker 1: passed away, for them to kind of send you a 446 00:23:15,040 --> 00:23:17,280 Speaker 1: sign in the form of a butterfly, and so that 447 00:23:17,359 --> 00:23:20,040 Speaker 1: was really really gave me a lot of chills. But 448 00:23:20,400 --> 00:23:22,440 Speaker 1: her daughter and son like love butterflies, and we got 449 00:23:22,440 --> 00:23:25,399 Speaker 1: to go see a giant tent of them in Disney World, 450 00:23:25,440 --> 00:23:27,720 Speaker 1: and I don't know, just really fucking love butterflies. Man. 451 00:23:28,800 --> 00:23:33,119 Speaker 1: My next one is from the summer of twenty nineteen, 452 00:23:33,160 --> 00:23:35,880 Speaker 1: I think, and I was kind of going through an 453 00:23:35,920 --> 00:23:40,320 Speaker 1: existential crisis, like, you know, why are we here, what's 454 00:23:40,359 --> 00:23:42,720 Speaker 1: the point? What's up in the sky? Is God real? 455 00:23:42,840 --> 00:23:46,480 Speaker 1: Like one of those ones, and you know, as as 456 00:23:46,520 --> 00:23:48,919 Speaker 1: you do every once in a while, and it was 457 00:23:48,920 --> 00:23:50,520 Speaker 1: sort of getting to me. And I had a night 458 00:23:50,560 --> 00:23:54,240 Speaker 1: where I was just like why why am I doing this? 459 00:23:54,359 --> 00:23:57,359 Speaker 1: Like everything hurts, everything's going wrong. It was before the 460 00:23:57,400 --> 00:23:58,960 Speaker 1: album came out, and I just was kind of in 461 00:23:59,000 --> 00:24:02,200 Speaker 1: a in a not necessarily dark place, but in a 462 00:24:02,320 --> 00:24:08,439 Speaker 1: very questioning place and bordering on nihilism and just just 463 00:24:08,480 --> 00:24:10,359 Speaker 1: for a moment like these are these are moments like 464 00:24:10,400 --> 00:24:13,399 Speaker 1: not my general perspective. Obviously I believe in higher power, 465 00:24:13,440 --> 00:24:16,720 Speaker 1: but I was like, just you know, questioning it. And 466 00:24:17,040 --> 00:24:22,399 Speaker 1: I was laying on uh like outside of a yurt 467 00:24:22,400 --> 00:24:24,240 Speaker 1: with some of my friends, Like we went and rented 468 00:24:24,240 --> 00:24:26,200 Speaker 1: a year in the Smoky Mountains and it was so cool. 469 00:24:26,600 --> 00:24:29,640 Speaker 1: But we're laying down and staring up at the sky 470 00:24:29,880 --> 00:24:33,439 Speaker 1: and it was just like flickering and sparkling and the 471 00:24:33,520 --> 00:24:37,040 Speaker 1: stars are so beautiful. And I was like, yeah, there's 472 00:24:37,200 --> 00:24:40,119 Speaker 1: no way that this was just a random coincidence. I'm like, 473 00:24:40,200 --> 00:24:44,359 Speaker 1: somebody put those there. Like God is real and even 474 00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:47,639 Speaker 1: in the darkest moments you can find a little sparkle everywhere. 475 00:24:47,640 --> 00:24:49,760 Speaker 1: So I got like three little sparkles on my arm. 476 00:24:50,320 --> 00:24:53,199 Speaker 1: It's kind of silly, but I really I really like it, 477 00:24:53,280 --> 00:24:55,760 Speaker 1: and that's just an important thought. It's a little cheesy, 478 00:24:55,840 --> 00:24:58,119 Speaker 1: but I think it's very real. Just to remind myself 479 00:24:58,200 --> 00:25:00,920 Speaker 1: that there's beauty even in the add parts of life. 480 00:25:01,160 --> 00:25:04,080 Speaker 1: This next one is probably my favorite, and it is 481 00:25:04,280 --> 00:25:08,359 Speaker 1: on my arm. It is from a tarot card from 482 00:25:08,480 --> 00:25:12,040 Speaker 1: the deck called Soul Cards, and the artist is co 483 00:25:12,240 --> 00:25:14,399 Speaker 1: Carina and she does a bunch of different stuff, like 484 00:25:14,440 --> 00:25:17,280 Speaker 1: not just tarot cards. My boyfriend got me a journal 485 00:25:17,320 --> 00:25:19,760 Speaker 1: that she'd done for my birthday, which was like such 486 00:25:19,800 --> 00:25:24,040 Speaker 1: a great gift, and she does just the coolest like simple, 487 00:25:24,200 --> 00:25:29,760 Speaker 1: very like space art. And I had pulled a lot 488 00:25:29,800 --> 00:25:32,080 Speaker 1: of cards when I was doing open book, Like I'd 489 00:25:32,119 --> 00:25:35,920 Speaker 1: also like to preface that tarot cards aren't like some 490 00:25:36,400 --> 00:25:40,280 Speaker 1: scary thing. They're just like little things that you can 491 00:25:40,280 --> 00:25:42,600 Speaker 1: play with and you find the answers that you need. 492 00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:45,120 Speaker 1: And I don't know, I just think that they're fun. 493 00:25:45,160 --> 00:25:47,360 Speaker 1: I use them when I meditate, and you can shuffle 494 00:25:47,400 --> 00:25:49,520 Speaker 1: the deck and find something in. Each card has something 495 00:25:49,560 --> 00:25:52,199 Speaker 1: to say to you. And people always think it's like 496 00:25:52,640 --> 00:25:54,880 Speaker 1: like the death card. The death card doesn't mean you're 497 00:25:54,880 --> 00:25:57,240 Speaker 1: going to die. The death card means that something in 498 00:25:57,240 --> 00:25:58,960 Speaker 1: your life is coming to a close and you need 499 00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:01,240 Speaker 1: to clean it out before you can let something new begin. 500 00:26:01,520 --> 00:26:03,520 Speaker 1: And that's beautiful. It just has a skull on it. 501 00:26:03,600 --> 00:26:06,639 Speaker 1: That's it. And so I really liked tarroot cards that 502 00:26:06,640 --> 00:26:08,239 Speaker 1: I got into them like two years ago, and I 503 00:26:08,280 --> 00:26:11,600 Speaker 1: just think they're really cool. The history of them is fascinating. 504 00:26:11,840 --> 00:26:16,280 Speaker 1: And I actually found out that my great time sixteen 505 00:26:16,400 --> 00:26:21,760 Speaker 1: grandfather was an alchymist. I found this out on the internet. 506 00:26:21,800 --> 00:26:24,479 Speaker 1: It was so crazy. It did some really deep genealogy stuff. 507 00:26:24,720 --> 00:26:27,199 Speaker 1: And some of his art from his books went on 508 00:26:27,320 --> 00:26:31,080 Speaker 1: to become modern day tarot cards and like some of 509 00:26:31,119 --> 00:26:34,119 Speaker 1: the the o G decks from like the ninet eighteen hundreds, 510 00:26:34,119 --> 00:26:36,880 Speaker 1: which is so cool. So that made me feel even 511 00:26:36,960 --> 00:26:39,440 Speaker 1: closer to them. But when I was making Open Book, 512 00:26:39,520 --> 00:26:41,600 Speaker 1: I would do a lot of different little readings when 513 00:26:41,600 --> 00:26:43,520 Speaker 1: I was on the road and just be like, you know, 514 00:26:44,040 --> 00:26:47,440 Speaker 1: what could I be doing to further my career and 515 00:26:47,440 --> 00:26:50,280 Speaker 1: and make myself feel better? And what could I be doing? 516 00:26:50,560 --> 00:26:52,480 Speaker 1: And you know, you pull these cards and you find 517 00:26:52,480 --> 00:26:57,000 Speaker 1: the answers, and I think, really, the answers are always 518 00:26:57,000 --> 00:27:01,639 Speaker 1: inside of us. They're they're never out. They're like, you 519 00:27:01,720 --> 00:27:04,480 Speaker 1: know what you need to do, And that's why when 520 00:27:04,480 --> 00:27:06,879 Speaker 1: we ask for advice, it's always hilarious because like, you 521 00:27:06,920 --> 00:27:08,639 Speaker 1: know the answer you want to get, but then you 522 00:27:08,640 --> 00:27:10,920 Speaker 1: know the answer that's the right one, and sometimes they're both. 523 00:27:11,160 --> 00:27:13,600 Speaker 1: But like sometimes my friends will ask me for advice 524 00:27:13,600 --> 00:27:15,600 Speaker 1: and I'm like and then they go do the exact opposite. 525 00:27:15,600 --> 00:27:17,280 Speaker 1: I'm like, well why did you ask? You know what 526 00:27:17,320 --> 00:27:19,880 Speaker 1: I mean, what's the point And if you just look 527 00:27:19,880 --> 00:27:22,320 Speaker 1: inside yourself, like we always know what's right and our 528 00:27:22,359 --> 00:27:24,600 Speaker 1: hearts will guide us. And I think that's very important. 529 00:27:25,240 --> 00:27:28,160 Speaker 1: So that's why I like tarot cards. But that's also 530 00:27:28,200 --> 00:27:30,840 Speaker 1: the tarot card I got. So every single reading I 531 00:27:30,880 --> 00:27:33,560 Speaker 1: pulled for Open Book, I kept pulling this card called 532 00:27:33,600 --> 00:27:37,760 Speaker 1: the Hermit card, and it is it's actually what is 533 00:27:37,880 --> 00:27:40,840 Speaker 1: what's the cover of that led Zeppelin album? And it's 534 00:27:40,880 --> 00:27:43,919 Speaker 1: this man holding a lantern. But because this is a 535 00:27:43,920 --> 00:27:47,320 Speaker 1: really modern deck, it's like super abstract and it's just 536 00:27:47,359 --> 00:27:51,080 Speaker 1: like this really cool lantern and it's like super simple, 537 00:27:51,160 --> 00:27:53,120 Speaker 1: just a bunch of lines and it's really really cool. 538 00:27:53,200 --> 00:27:56,359 Speaker 1: But I kept pulling it. And that card means finding 539 00:27:56,359 --> 00:27:59,199 Speaker 1: the answers within yourself, realizing that the light is inside 540 00:27:59,200 --> 00:28:02,399 Speaker 1: of you and you can guide your own way and 541 00:28:02,440 --> 00:28:05,240 Speaker 1: find your own path. You just have to go within 542 00:28:05,280 --> 00:28:09,879 Speaker 1: yourself and learn how to enjoy solitude and find peace 543 00:28:09,960 --> 00:28:12,320 Speaker 1: and silence. And that's always been really hard for me 544 00:28:12,400 --> 00:28:15,920 Speaker 1: because I like to be surrounded by constant noise, constant activity, 545 00:28:16,000 --> 00:28:18,960 Speaker 1: borderline chaos. I don't like to stay at home. I mean, 546 00:28:19,160 --> 00:28:22,280 Speaker 1: listen to Gasby and you'll get the idea. But during 547 00:28:22,640 --> 00:28:24,560 Speaker 1: the making of Open Book, that was the first time 548 00:28:24,600 --> 00:28:27,240 Speaker 1: I was ever alone in my life. Like I had 549 00:28:27,280 --> 00:28:29,719 Speaker 1: gone from living with my mom to be living with 550 00:28:29,760 --> 00:28:33,960 Speaker 1: my boyfriend and just never had like come home to 551 00:28:34,040 --> 00:28:36,199 Speaker 1: an empty house. And I lived on my own and 552 00:28:36,240 --> 00:28:39,400 Speaker 1: I was on tour, but I was just touring by myself, 553 00:28:39,440 --> 00:28:41,360 Speaker 1: and it was me, my tour manager and my driver, 554 00:28:41,840 --> 00:28:44,080 Speaker 1: and I was just alone in the back bunk like 555 00:28:44,280 --> 00:28:46,840 Speaker 1: all the time. And I had to learn how to 556 00:28:46,880 --> 00:28:49,200 Speaker 1: be okay with that and how to enjoy my own 557 00:28:49,200 --> 00:28:52,000 Speaker 1: company and not run from my own thoughts. So I 558 00:28:52,080 --> 00:28:54,640 Speaker 1: kept pulling this card and I was like, shit, Okay, well, 559 00:28:54,760 --> 00:28:59,280 Speaker 1: clearly somebody's telling me something. And uh on the land 560 00:28:59,360 --> 00:29:03,840 Speaker 1: rhyme store past year. So last December December of en 561 00:29:05,080 --> 00:29:06,960 Speaker 1: I guess that's not last December anymore. Just give me 562 00:29:07,000 --> 00:29:09,440 Speaker 1: a break. Anyways, it was December of twenty nineteen, and 563 00:29:09,560 --> 00:29:11,520 Speaker 1: my friend and I were in Atlanta and I was 564 00:29:11,560 --> 00:29:13,560 Speaker 1: just like, let's get tattoos and we go in and 565 00:29:13,800 --> 00:29:15,720 Speaker 1: it was just super cool and it's one of my favorites. 566 00:29:15,800 --> 00:29:18,240 Speaker 1: It's like on like a rate above the inside of 567 00:29:18,280 --> 00:29:20,800 Speaker 1: my elbow, and I'll post a picture of it, but 568 00:29:20,800 --> 00:29:23,080 Speaker 1: it's it's just one of my favorites ever, and it's 569 00:29:23,080 --> 00:29:25,800 Speaker 1: a good reminder that, hey, you should spend some time alone. 570 00:29:26,480 --> 00:29:30,360 Speaker 1: And last, but not least, my newest tattoo is when 571 00:29:30,360 --> 00:29:33,400 Speaker 1: I got on my living room floor during quarantine. Um, 572 00:29:33,480 --> 00:29:38,080 Speaker 1: my roommate had someone staying with us, and um, we'd 573 00:29:38,080 --> 00:29:40,600 Speaker 1: all had we'd all had COVID. She was quarantining with 574 00:29:40,720 --> 00:29:44,560 Speaker 1: us while she was in Nashville, and she was getting 575 00:29:44,960 --> 00:29:46,680 Speaker 1: good at doing stick in pokes and she had like 576 00:29:46,720 --> 00:29:50,200 Speaker 1: a professional set, so it wasn't like a pen and 577 00:29:51,040 --> 00:29:53,640 Speaker 1: a needle. It was like an actual legitimate stick in 578 00:29:53,680 --> 00:29:56,520 Speaker 1: poke kit. But I just laid on my floor with 579 00:29:56,600 --> 00:29:58,440 Speaker 1: my face and a pillow while she drew a little 580 00:29:58,480 --> 00:30:00,920 Speaker 1: crystal ball on the outside of my arm, like it's 581 00:30:01,000 --> 00:30:03,640 Speaker 1: right above my elbow and it's super small, and I 582 00:30:03,680 --> 00:30:05,520 Speaker 1: just like it because I used that emoji all the 583 00:30:05,600 --> 00:30:09,200 Speaker 1: time and it was really fun. It didn't hurt as 584 00:30:09,200 --> 00:30:11,320 Speaker 1: bad as I thought it would. It definitely took a while, 585 00:30:11,360 --> 00:30:13,760 Speaker 1: but it was just like little pokes, and it definitely 586 00:30:13,800 --> 00:30:15,240 Speaker 1: didn't feel like a shot, like it just kind of 587 00:30:15,280 --> 00:30:18,520 Speaker 1: felt like a like a tiny little it's a tiny 588 00:30:18,520 --> 00:30:20,240 Speaker 1: little poke. And I don't know, I really like it. 589 00:30:20,280 --> 00:30:23,120 Speaker 1: I think it's a funny story. Like I was, you know, 590 00:30:23,200 --> 00:30:25,400 Speaker 1: no tattoo shops were open, and I was like, nope, 591 00:30:25,440 --> 00:30:27,640 Speaker 1: I'm getting one anyways. I'm gonna find a way. So 592 00:30:27,880 --> 00:30:30,440 Speaker 1: that was really fun and she got a little practicing 593 00:30:30,480 --> 00:30:32,200 Speaker 1: because I was like, I don't care if it sucks, 594 00:30:32,200 --> 00:30:34,240 Speaker 1: like I can just get it covered up. It's so small, 595 00:30:34,360 --> 00:30:37,880 Speaker 1: and it didn't suck. She did a wonderful job. Last, 596 00:30:37,880 --> 00:30:40,440 Speaker 1: but not least, I want to talk about something that's 597 00:30:40,480 --> 00:30:44,840 Speaker 1: even more important to me than my tattoos. There's been 598 00:30:45,080 --> 00:30:48,440 Speaker 1: several people, like a lot actually like it, like a 599 00:30:48,440 --> 00:30:51,520 Speaker 1: really decent amount of people who have gotten my lyrics 600 00:30:51,560 --> 00:30:54,360 Speaker 1: tattooed on them, and that always just bulows my mind. 601 00:30:54,520 --> 00:30:56,760 Speaker 1: Like one of my fans, Brooklyn, has fight like a 602 00:30:56,800 --> 00:31:00,000 Speaker 1: Girl lyrics in my handwriting, and there's so many other 603 00:31:00,040 --> 00:31:02,880 Speaker 1: ors who have had me like write out something and 604 00:31:02,960 --> 00:31:06,320 Speaker 1: gotten these tattoos with things from my songs that have 605 00:31:06,400 --> 00:31:09,240 Speaker 1: really spoken to them, and I think that's the ultimate goal. 606 00:31:09,520 --> 00:31:13,080 Speaker 1: There's this one girl who has um a giant back piece, 607 00:31:13,200 --> 00:31:15,280 Speaker 1: like giantly takes of her entire back and it says 608 00:31:15,280 --> 00:31:17,920 Speaker 1: Perfume Sweet and Whiskey strong. And I'm like, holy sh it, 609 00:31:17,920 --> 00:31:20,680 Speaker 1: I'm gonna be with you your entire life. And then 610 00:31:20,720 --> 00:31:23,320 Speaker 1: there was this other woman who had the coolest sleeve 611 00:31:23,480 --> 00:31:25,960 Speaker 1: and it was these are big tattoos we're talking about, 612 00:31:26,000 --> 00:31:28,120 Speaker 1: like there's a little lyric ones. And then there's this 613 00:31:28,160 --> 00:31:30,680 Speaker 1: one and it was a bottle, a whiskey and a 614 00:31:30,680 --> 00:31:33,360 Speaker 1: perfume bottle, and it said like perfume sweet and whiskey 615 00:31:33,360 --> 00:31:35,280 Speaker 1: strong over it, and it took up her entire arm 616 00:31:35,320 --> 00:31:37,600 Speaker 1: and it was so cool. And I just don't think 617 00:31:37,600 --> 00:31:43,280 Speaker 1: that there's any bigger compliment to an artist than someone 618 00:31:43,400 --> 00:31:45,680 Speaker 1: liking what you have to say enough to get it 619 00:31:45,720 --> 00:31:49,120 Speaker 1: on them forever. So yeah, kind of blows my mind. 620 00:31:49,560 --> 00:31:51,320 Speaker 1: I think the next tattoo I want to get is 621 00:31:52,280 --> 00:31:56,280 Speaker 1: lyrics to Motorcycle Drive by by a Third Eye Blind. 622 00:31:56,840 --> 00:31:59,120 Speaker 1: It's a super important song to me and inspired a 623 00:31:59,120 --> 00:32:01,000 Speaker 1: lot of things, and um, I might have a little 624 00:32:01,000 --> 00:32:05,800 Speaker 1: surprise coming next year involving that, So keep your eyes peeled, 625 00:32:06,000 --> 00:32:09,000 Speaker 1: but there's a line in it that's says, I've never 626 00:32:09,080 --> 00:32:11,600 Speaker 1: been so alone and I've never been so alive, And 627 00:32:12,880 --> 00:32:16,560 Speaker 1: it's just another reminder that, like you know, alone doesn't 628 00:32:16,560 --> 00:32:19,480 Speaker 1: mean lonely, like you have the answers inside of you. 629 00:32:19,920 --> 00:32:24,000 Speaker 1: And it wasn't until I didn't have anybody that I 630 00:32:24,080 --> 00:32:27,760 Speaker 1: found myself. So I hope you guys enjoyed this episode. 631 00:32:27,800 --> 00:32:29,720 Speaker 1: Thanks for listening to me talk about my tattoos. Thank 632 00:32:29,720 --> 00:32:32,080 Speaker 1: you so much for the episode recommendation, Lauren, And if 633 00:32:32,120 --> 00:32:34,000 Speaker 1: you guys have anything you want to hear, please tweet 634 00:32:34,040 --> 00:32:36,480 Speaker 1: me at Kaylee Shore. My social media is in the 635 00:32:36,480 --> 00:32:39,720 Speaker 1: info for this episode. You guys, we just hit over 636 00:32:40,080 --> 00:32:43,840 Speaker 1: fifty listeners. I think it's probably closer to sixty by now, 637 00:32:43,880 --> 00:32:45,440 Speaker 1: but I just want to say thank you so much. 638 00:32:45,560 --> 00:32:49,640 Speaker 1: I'm so blown away by what this podcast is done 639 00:32:49,720 --> 00:32:52,560 Speaker 1: and I'm super thankful for you guys, and I will 640 00:32:52,560 --> 00:32:54,840 Speaker 1: see you next Wednesday. I'm Kaylie Shore and this is 641 00:32:54,840 --> 00:33:03,080 Speaker 1: too much to say, est us go anser. Soon I'll 642 00:33:03,120 --> 00:33:06,840 Speaker 1: go to say, I'll turn it out of you