1 00:00:01,320 --> 00:00:04,600 Speaker 1: Hey, lady, is doctor dom here. If you like this 2 00:00:04,720 --> 00:00:07,240 Speaker 1: show and you want to make your own, let me 3 00:00:07,280 --> 00:00:10,840 Speaker 1: tell you about the free platform Anchor. It's a creation 4 00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:13,800 Speaker 1: tool that allows you to record and edit your podcast 5 00:00:13,920 --> 00:00:17,280 Speaker 1: right from your phone or computer. You can add songs 6 00:00:17,280 --> 00:00:21,040 Speaker 1: from Spotify and create any type of content that you 7 00:00:21,079 --> 00:00:24,400 Speaker 1: are looking for. Anchor will distribute it all for you 8 00:00:24,760 --> 00:00:28,440 Speaker 1: so it can be heard on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and more. 9 00:00:29,160 --> 00:00:32,040 Speaker 1: Download the free Anchor app or go to anchor dot 10 00:00:32,159 --> 00:00:33,800 Speaker 1: fm to get started. 11 00:00:33,840 --> 00:00:38,000 Speaker 2: On this week's episode in her Space. This is a 12 00:00:38,080 --> 00:00:40,360 Speaker 2: time to love on us, but I think in order 13 00:00:40,400 --> 00:00:42,640 Speaker 2: to love on us and support us, we have to 14 00:00:42,680 --> 00:00:45,239 Speaker 2: love ourselves. Because if you don't love yourself, and if 15 00:00:45,280 --> 00:00:47,800 Speaker 2: you don't love who you are, it's going to be 16 00:00:47,840 --> 00:00:51,120 Speaker 2: that much harder to love the sister that looks just 17 00:00:51,240 --> 00:00:53,760 Speaker 2: like you, the brother that looks just like you, right, 18 00:00:54,080 --> 00:00:55,840 Speaker 2: and it's going to be part of our work as 19 00:00:55,840 --> 00:00:57,840 Speaker 2: a community. So I think this is the ideal time 20 00:00:58,240 --> 00:01:01,640 Speaker 2: to go within to understand what are the things that 21 00:01:01,720 --> 00:01:04,200 Speaker 2: I'm struggling with, because I think that we become our 22 00:01:04,240 --> 00:01:07,880 Speaker 2: best selves that'll allow us to become better for our community. 23 00:01:08,680 --> 00:01:12,280 Speaker 2: Today's episode is sure to provide you with motivation, inspiration, 24 00:01:12,680 --> 00:01:16,560 Speaker 2: or even a fresh perspective. If you have any AHA moments, 25 00:01:16,680 --> 00:01:19,840 Speaker 2: or if you feel comforted throughout the episode, Lady, please 26 00:01:19,920 --> 00:01:21,679 Speaker 2: leave us a review and tell us what we're doing 27 00:01:21,760 --> 00:01:24,119 Speaker 2: right so we can stay on track. Also, we release 28 00:01:24,160 --> 00:01:27,600 Speaker 2: episodes every Friday, so be sure to subscribe on iTunes 29 00:01:27,680 --> 00:01:30,480 Speaker 2: and visit herspace podcast dot com and enter your email 30 00:01:30,520 --> 00:01:33,160 Speaker 2: address to get updates about our live events and all 31 00:01:33,319 --> 00:01:35,839 Speaker 2: the new beginnings that we have for this year. 32 00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:42,120 Speaker 1: Welcome to her Space, a podcast dedicated to uplifting women 33 00:01:42,319 --> 00:01:47,400 Speaker 1: like you. We're your costs Doctor Dominique Brussard, a polege 34 00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:49,720 Speaker 1: professor and psychologist. 35 00:01:49,280 --> 00:01:52,480 Speaker 2: And Terry Lomax, a techie and motivational speaker. 36 00:01:53,680 --> 00:01:57,840 Speaker 3: In a world where black women are often misrepresented and misunderstood, 37 00:01:58,240 --> 00:02:03,000 Speaker 3: please join us as we initiate authentic conversations on everything 38 00:02:03,080 --> 00:02:06,600 Speaker 3: from fibroids to fake friends and create a safe space 39 00:02:06,640 --> 00:02:07,840 Speaker 3: where black women can. 40 00:02:07,800 --> 00:02:08,720 Speaker 4: Just be. 41 00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:18,160 Speaker 5: Hey, Lady, is doctor dom here from the Herspace Podcast. 42 00:02:18,720 --> 00:02:20,760 Speaker 5: Do you have a burning question you're dying to get 43 00:02:20,760 --> 00:02:24,440 Speaker 5: feedback on. Do you want an unbiased perspective on a 44 00:02:24,480 --> 00:02:30,000 Speaker 5: situation you're facing? If so, visit herspacepodcast dot com. And 45 00:02:30,040 --> 00:02:34,720 Speaker 5: click ask doctor Dom under the start here option. Every Tuesday, 46 00:02:34,840 --> 00:02:37,400 Speaker 5: I'll choose a few questions and answer them at random. 47 00:02:38,880 --> 00:02:42,080 Speaker 5: Our quote of the day comes to us from missus 48 00:02:42,240 --> 00:02:48,840 Speaker 5: Rachel Cargo. Revolutions are the responses of people in distress. 49 00:02:49,520 --> 00:02:58,880 Speaker 5: Revolutions are the responses of people in distress. Lady, we 50 00:02:59,200 --> 00:03:08,359 Speaker 5: are in distress. The black community is in distress. 51 00:03:09,639 --> 00:03:17,040 Speaker 1: Today's episode is definitely going to be a heavy one. 52 00:03:17,360 --> 00:03:22,320 Speaker 1: And so before we dive into our conversation, as you're 53 00:03:22,400 --> 00:03:26,480 Speaker 1: listening to us right now, in this moment, I want 54 00:03:26,520 --> 00:03:31,160 Speaker 1: you to stop what you're doing and take a big, 55 00:03:31,320 --> 00:03:37,520 Speaker 1: deep breath in and hold it for the count of one, 56 00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:47,320 Speaker 1: two three four five and now release it on account 57 00:03:47,480 --> 00:03:56,520 Speaker 1: of one two three four five. And as you're listening 58 00:03:56,560 --> 00:04:03,360 Speaker 1: throughout this episode, make sure or that you pause as 59 00:04:03,440 --> 00:04:07,720 Speaker 1: much as you need to and check in on your breath. 60 00:04:07,960 --> 00:04:13,320 Speaker 1: And if you need to take deep breaths, please do so. 61 00:04:14,040 --> 00:04:16,800 Speaker 1: All right, team, are we ready to dive in? 62 00:04:17,800 --> 00:04:20,080 Speaker 2: I think we are, Dom, I think we are. This 63 00:04:20,240 --> 00:04:24,520 Speaker 2: is definitely a heavy topic, and I feel like one 64 00:04:24,560 --> 00:04:27,680 Speaker 2: of the first sort of questions we should ask ourselves 65 00:04:27,720 --> 00:04:29,720 Speaker 2: right now is just how do we feel? You know, 66 00:04:30,200 --> 00:04:33,440 Speaker 2: we posted about this on social media and got a 67 00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:35,520 Speaker 2: lot of feedback, but I just kind of wanted to 68 00:04:35,520 --> 00:04:38,800 Speaker 2: start this conversation with you know, don When I think 69 00:04:38,839 --> 00:04:41,480 Speaker 2: about my role and when I think about how I 70 00:04:41,520 --> 00:04:43,760 Speaker 2: feel about everything going on, I want to be super 71 00:04:43,800 --> 00:04:47,480 Speaker 2: transparent and saying that I never saw myself as an advocate, right, 72 00:04:47,520 --> 00:04:49,880 Speaker 2: I never saw myself as an activist or a person 73 00:04:49,920 --> 00:04:52,760 Speaker 2: that is doing the work that I feel like we've 74 00:04:52,800 --> 00:04:57,159 Speaker 2: sort of been thrust in this world to do based 75 00:04:57,200 --> 00:05:00,200 Speaker 2: on the current state. But I feel that you you know, 76 00:05:00,720 --> 00:05:04,440 Speaker 2: we were born with this beautiful melanated skin, and I 77 00:05:04,520 --> 00:05:06,920 Speaker 2: feel that I have an obligation to do what's right 78 00:05:06,960 --> 00:05:11,040 Speaker 2: for my community, and I guess the most important thing 79 00:05:11,080 --> 00:05:12,760 Speaker 2: is to make sure that I'm taking care of self first. 80 00:05:12,760 --> 00:05:14,720 Speaker 2: But when I think about how I feel, I think 81 00:05:14,720 --> 00:05:16,480 Speaker 2: that's the initial feeling. I was thinking about this the 82 00:05:16,560 --> 00:05:18,640 Speaker 2: other day and I was like, I literally, when I 83 00:05:18,640 --> 00:05:21,200 Speaker 2: think about living my best life, it didn't involve dealing 84 00:05:21,240 --> 00:05:24,000 Speaker 2: with this racism that's going on. It didn't involve dealing 85 00:05:24,040 --> 00:05:27,120 Speaker 2: with this trauma, this racial trauma. And you know, I 86 00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:29,359 Speaker 2: was thinking about last week was a hard week for me. 87 00:05:29,800 --> 00:05:31,279 Speaker 2: Last week was a hard week for me when it 88 00:05:31,279 --> 00:05:33,880 Speaker 2: comes to my business. I couldn't send out any emails, 89 00:05:33,880 --> 00:05:36,600 Speaker 2: I couldn't post anything about that. It just didn't feel right. 90 00:05:36,600 --> 00:05:39,440 Speaker 2: And there was so much going on internally that I 91 00:05:39,480 --> 00:05:44,160 Speaker 2: just felt too overwhelmed, too exhausted, And it's just a 92 00:05:44,200 --> 00:05:44,680 Speaker 2: lot dumb. 93 00:05:45,279 --> 00:05:50,440 Speaker 1: It truly is a lot, And I want to acknowledge 94 00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:54,760 Speaker 1: that all of our feelings, no matter what they are, 95 00:05:55,640 --> 00:05:59,960 Speaker 1: are valid. And you know, as you're saying, oh, I'm 96 00:06:00,040 --> 00:06:08,200 Speaker 1: feeling overwhelmed, that's normal. If someone is listening and they're saying, well, 97 00:06:09,400 --> 00:06:18,240 Speaker 1: I'm feeling numb or helpless or hopeless, or angry or 98 00:06:18,560 --> 00:06:26,960 Speaker 1: enraged or deeply sadden. No matter what the feelings are, 99 00:06:27,160 --> 00:06:34,920 Speaker 1: they are all valid. And personally, I over the last 100 00:06:35,560 --> 00:06:41,040 Speaker 1: couple of weeks, when someone asks me how I'm feeling, 101 00:06:42,080 --> 00:06:44,760 Speaker 1: one of the things that I have been responding to 102 00:06:44,760 --> 00:06:47,960 Speaker 1: people with is starting off by saying, in this moment. 103 00:06:48,560 --> 00:06:50,320 Speaker 4: By doing so, I want to. 104 00:06:50,360 --> 00:06:58,000 Speaker 1: Acknowledge that my feelings have been up and down throughout 105 00:06:58,040 --> 00:07:04,440 Speaker 1: this time, and depending on that particular moment in which 106 00:07:04,480 --> 00:07:10,960 Speaker 1: I'm engaging, will that determines how I'm feeling. And in 107 00:07:11,240 --> 00:07:17,960 Speaker 1: this moment right now, with us recording what feels like 108 00:07:18,000 --> 00:07:22,800 Speaker 1: a really necessary and important episode. I have mixed emotions, 109 00:07:23,280 --> 00:07:30,480 Speaker 1: So I have feelings of empowerment because I'm doing my 110 00:07:30,640 --> 00:07:37,480 Speaker 1: work right now, right us engaging in this dialogue. 111 00:07:37,680 --> 00:07:40,080 Speaker 4: This is my work, this is what. 112 00:07:40,040 --> 00:07:43,720 Speaker 1: I live for, this is what I'm passionate about finding 113 00:07:43,800 --> 00:07:49,000 Speaker 1: ways for us to kind of have the difficult conversations to. 114 00:07:50,560 --> 00:07:51,440 Speaker 4: Lead to healing. 115 00:07:52,040 --> 00:07:55,720 Speaker 1: So I'm feeling empowered about that. But because it's a 116 00:07:55,800 --> 00:08:01,560 Speaker 1: difficult topic for us to address, it's a heavy topic, 117 00:08:02,640 --> 00:08:08,160 Speaker 1: I'm also feeling a little bit of anxiety, which I 118 00:08:08,160 --> 00:08:13,360 Speaker 1: think is normal when you're diving into something really heavy, 119 00:08:14,680 --> 00:08:18,480 Speaker 1: Like there's like a little bit of anxiousness of what 120 00:08:18,640 --> 00:08:22,000 Speaker 1: emotions are going to come up as we dive into 121 00:08:22,040 --> 00:08:27,120 Speaker 1: this conversation. And so for me, I want to be 122 00:08:27,240 --> 00:08:30,680 Speaker 1: able to lean into both of those emotions, and so 123 00:08:31,480 --> 00:08:38,199 Speaker 1: using that feeling of empowerment to encourage me to continue 124 00:08:38,280 --> 00:08:42,120 Speaker 1: in this conversation despite any anxiety that I might be 125 00:08:42,160 --> 00:08:45,640 Speaker 1: feeling about diving into something so heavy. 126 00:08:46,240 --> 00:08:48,120 Speaker 2: That's a good point, Donnon. I'm glad that you share 127 00:08:48,160 --> 00:08:51,079 Speaker 2: that as well, because I think a lot of people 128 00:08:51,120 --> 00:08:54,480 Speaker 2: can resonate with the anxiety. You know, there are so 129 00:08:54,600 --> 00:08:58,600 Speaker 2: many different things that we do every day that black 130 00:08:58,640 --> 00:09:01,880 Speaker 2: people have been harmed, killed doing and so that is 131 00:09:02,040 --> 00:09:04,480 Speaker 2: enough to give someone anxiety. I think about the nerves. 132 00:09:04,800 --> 00:09:07,320 Speaker 2: My stomach has kind of been a knots throughout the week, 133 00:09:07,360 --> 00:09:09,280 Speaker 2: and it's been kind of difficult to just you know, 134 00:09:09,600 --> 00:09:12,679 Speaker 2: eat and really focused. You know, I kind of been 135 00:09:12,679 --> 00:09:14,199 Speaker 2: going through this battle of like, Okay, I got to 136 00:09:14,200 --> 00:09:16,160 Speaker 2: stay off social media and take a break, but then 137 00:09:16,520 --> 00:09:18,840 Speaker 2: I want to log on to see if I missed anything, 138 00:09:18,840 --> 00:09:20,600 Speaker 2: if there's something new that I need to know about. 139 00:09:20,880 --> 00:09:22,439 Speaker 2: And so I'm definitely with you there. And I think 140 00:09:22,480 --> 00:09:25,200 Speaker 2: the sad part about this is for us, many of 141 00:09:25,200 --> 00:09:30,120 Speaker 2: these feelings are not unfamiliar. We've had to unfortunately deal 142 00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:32,240 Speaker 2: with these feelings and some of us have numbed ourselves 143 00:09:32,320 --> 00:09:37,320 Speaker 2: because of the constant ways in which black people are 144 00:09:37,800 --> 00:09:40,960 Speaker 2: treated in this country, right, And I think we often 145 00:09:40,960 --> 00:09:44,280 Speaker 2: feel this way when police officers and suspected white supremacists 146 00:09:44,280 --> 00:09:47,000 Speaker 2: and white supremacists kill our people. It makes me think 147 00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:50,920 Speaker 2: about Filando Castile and Sandra Bland and Eric Garner and 148 00:09:51,240 --> 00:09:55,720 Speaker 2: Tamir Rice and Breonna Taylor, Ahmaud Arbery, right, Michael Brown, 149 00:09:55,880 --> 00:09:57,960 Speaker 2: so many names, and the list goes on and on, 150 00:09:58,000 --> 00:10:01,120 Speaker 2: and we can literally list our people for an entire 151 00:10:01,240 --> 00:10:03,079 Speaker 2: episode down. I mean, it's ridiculous. 152 00:10:03,200 --> 00:10:09,319 Speaker 1: You know, what we are experiencing is racial trauma, and 153 00:10:10,080 --> 00:10:21,560 Speaker 1: we are constantly being traumatized from a racial perspective, repeatedly, repeatedly, 154 00:10:22,400 --> 00:10:29,400 Speaker 1: And for those who are unfamiliar with the term racial trauma, 155 00:10:30,240 --> 00:10:39,640 Speaker 1: a racial trauma is that repeated physical and psychological experience 156 00:10:40,040 --> 00:10:51,240 Speaker 1: of being exposed to racism, being exposed to hatred, discrimination, 157 00:10:52,200 --> 00:10:55,480 Speaker 1: And the feelings that often arise for us when we 158 00:10:55,720 --> 00:11:05,760 Speaker 1: experience racial trauma are feelings of helplessness, hopelessness, sadness, fear, anger. 159 00:11:06,960 --> 00:11:07,640 Speaker 4: But then we. 160 00:11:07,640 --> 00:11:16,600 Speaker 1: Also might find ourselves experiencing some confusion, maybe even some guilt. 161 00:11:17,400 --> 00:11:21,120 Speaker 1: We may notice that we terry, like you mentioned, like 162 00:11:21,160 --> 00:11:25,360 Speaker 1: that tightness and that tension, right, so maybe some headaches 163 00:11:25,440 --> 00:11:31,000 Speaker 1: or body aches, maybe some insomnia. I know that for myself, 164 00:11:31,040 --> 00:11:32,760 Speaker 1: I've had a couple of nights where it's been kind 165 00:11:32,800 --> 00:11:35,360 Speaker 1: of difficult to sleep, and I've talked to other folks 166 00:11:35,400 --> 00:11:39,640 Speaker 1: where they've said, like, it's been hard to sleep, and 167 00:11:40,960 --> 00:11:45,680 Speaker 1: all of those like just in heightened anxiety, heightened depression, 168 00:11:46,320 --> 00:11:49,920 Speaker 1: all of those are symptoms of what it means to 169 00:11:50,080 --> 00:11:55,240 Speaker 1: experience racial trauma. And I think it's important for us 170 00:11:55,280 --> 00:12:00,199 Speaker 1: to acknowledge that as black people, and I want to 171 00:12:00,280 --> 00:12:03,319 Speaker 1: be clear that I'm talking about us as black folks, 172 00:12:04,080 --> 00:12:07,120 Speaker 1: that other people of color, other communities of color do 173 00:12:07,280 --> 00:12:13,400 Speaker 1: experience racial trauma, but right now, our attention is on 174 00:12:13,800 --> 00:12:17,440 Speaker 1: the racial trauma that is specific to the black community. 175 00:12:17,840 --> 00:12:21,800 Speaker 1: It needs to stop, like at what point will enough 176 00:12:22,240 --> 00:12:23,280 Speaker 1: really be enough? 177 00:12:24,400 --> 00:12:29,600 Speaker 2: Exactly? And I love that distinction because I think that oftentimes, 178 00:12:30,160 --> 00:12:33,440 Speaker 2: you know, black people will get lumped into the people 179 00:12:33,440 --> 00:12:37,000 Speaker 2: of color conversation, and there are times when it is 180 00:12:37,040 --> 00:12:40,079 Speaker 2: necessary for us as people of color to come together 181 00:12:40,559 --> 00:12:43,599 Speaker 2: and to use our strength in numbers and to advocate 182 00:12:43,640 --> 00:12:46,559 Speaker 2: for our rights. But I do think that sometimes it 183 00:12:46,640 --> 00:12:50,680 Speaker 2: can diminish our movement when we lump us in, because 184 00:12:51,360 --> 00:12:55,080 Speaker 2: what we're experiencing right now, the police brutality, the police murders, 185 00:12:55,400 --> 00:12:58,480 Speaker 2: the unjust treatment of black people in this country, it 186 00:12:58,559 --> 00:13:02,360 Speaker 2: is something that black people experience at disproportionate rates, and 187 00:13:02,400 --> 00:13:05,320 Speaker 2: so when we call out black people specifically, it does 188 00:13:05,400 --> 00:13:09,160 Speaker 2: not take anything away from the other flights of other communities. 189 00:13:09,520 --> 00:13:12,120 Speaker 2: It's important for us to make that distinction though in 190 00:13:12,160 --> 00:13:16,400 Speaker 2: this particular instance, and so I want to read off 191 00:13:16,440 --> 00:13:19,240 Speaker 2: down the few social media posts and tweets that caught 192 00:13:19,280 --> 00:13:20,959 Speaker 2: my eye where you ever just see a post and 193 00:13:20,960 --> 00:13:23,240 Speaker 2: you're like, oh my gosh, they literally just took the 194 00:13:23,240 --> 00:13:26,600 Speaker 2: words out of my mouth. This was so powerful, and 195 00:13:26,679 --> 00:13:29,600 Speaker 2: this first one and it says, it always amazes me 196 00:13:30,120 --> 00:13:33,720 Speaker 2: how y'all can have black significant others, black friends, black 197 00:13:33,760 --> 00:13:38,880 Speaker 2: family members, love black culture, post black rappers, get box braids, 198 00:13:38,960 --> 00:13:42,360 Speaker 2: want mixed babies, say the N word, but stay silent 199 00:13:42,400 --> 00:13:45,199 Speaker 2: when Black people are getting killed. If you take offense 200 00:13:45,240 --> 00:13:48,839 Speaker 2: to this or feel uneasy good, you shouldn't get to 201 00:13:48,880 --> 00:13:51,960 Speaker 2: pick and choose when black cultures convenient for you, when 202 00:13:51,960 --> 00:13:55,000 Speaker 2: we don't have that privilege. Black lives matter too. 203 00:13:55,960 --> 00:14:02,440 Speaker 4: Poor girl, right that right there? Who you know? 204 00:14:02,640 --> 00:14:05,880 Speaker 1: Honestly, there were a couple of people that I actually 205 00:14:05,960 --> 00:14:06,760 Speaker 1: thought about that. 206 00:14:07,800 --> 00:14:08,680 Speaker 4: That that applies to. 207 00:14:11,400 --> 00:14:18,600 Speaker 1: And I think that it's important for those people who 208 00:14:18,600 --> 00:14:23,720 Speaker 1: would see that tweet and take it personal, that that 209 00:14:24,600 --> 00:14:29,760 Speaker 1: propels them to actually dive deep and internally to do 210 00:14:29,800 --> 00:14:33,640 Speaker 1: the work, because I can't, for the life of me, 211 00:14:34,720 --> 00:14:38,800 Speaker 1: I don't understand what it means to truly have that 212 00:14:39,000 --> 00:14:47,600 Speaker 1: privilege of being able to take part and associate with 213 00:14:49,120 --> 00:14:58,000 Speaker 1: a culture of people and then conveniently ignore their existence. 214 00:14:59,360 --> 00:15:04,480 Speaker 1: When shit hits the fan, when things get difficult. Part 215 00:15:04,520 --> 00:15:10,160 Speaker 1: of my work is to understand people, right, I have 216 00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:12,240 Speaker 1: to admit that that is one of the areas where 217 00:15:12,280 --> 00:15:18,640 Speaker 1: I truly struggle with that understanding. I don't understand how 218 00:15:18,800 --> 00:15:23,360 Speaker 1: one could quote unquote show appreciation for and a love 219 00:15:23,520 --> 00:15:31,880 Speaker 1: for black people, be married to or have children, or 220 00:15:32,080 --> 00:15:37,840 Speaker 1: say that their closest friends are black, or work closely 221 00:15:38,600 --> 00:15:45,720 Speaker 1: with black people, or provide services to black people and 222 00:15:45,800 --> 00:15:51,720 Speaker 1: smile in our faces, but choose to remain silent during 223 00:15:51,760 --> 00:15:52,560 Speaker 1: times like this. 224 00:15:53,640 --> 00:15:56,480 Speaker 2: Yes, I agree with you, Tom, I really really do 225 00:15:56,760 --> 00:15:59,280 Speaker 2: you know? It's about time that other people are speaking 226 00:15:59,280 --> 00:16:01,480 Speaker 2: of know whether they are I don't personally remember a 227 00:16:01,600 --> 00:16:06,520 Speaker 2: time when the world was advocating for black people in 228 00:16:06,520 --> 00:16:09,320 Speaker 2: this way. And enough is enough, you know, And that 229 00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:13,760 Speaker 2: takes me to broader Hunter's tweet and this says white 230 00:16:13,760 --> 00:16:17,160 Speaker 2: people be like, yeah, we keep killing y'all, but please 231 00:16:17,160 --> 00:16:20,080 Speaker 2: start resorting to violence to make a point enough is enough. 232 00:16:20,720 --> 00:16:22,640 Speaker 2: I'm like, well, you know, Dom and I talked about 233 00:16:22,680 --> 00:16:26,240 Speaker 2: this on our Instagram live and we talked about how 234 00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:30,960 Speaker 2: we personally we may not be out you know, rioting 235 00:16:31,000 --> 00:16:34,200 Speaker 2: and looting and things like that, However we understand how 236 00:16:34,200 --> 00:16:37,160 Speaker 2: people could get to that point if you keep killing 237 00:16:37,240 --> 00:16:39,040 Speaker 2: us and people get off or they get a slap 238 00:16:39,080 --> 00:16:42,000 Speaker 2: on the wrist, and it just keeps on happening. You know, 239 00:16:42,040 --> 00:16:44,360 Speaker 2: first they say, oh, we need body cams, we need video, 240 00:16:44,560 --> 00:16:46,440 Speaker 2: then you get video. I mean, the thing is they 241 00:16:46,560 --> 00:16:50,480 Speaker 2: kill black children, black you know, people of all ages. 242 00:16:50,600 --> 00:16:53,840 Speaker 2: I mean it's just blatant and it's cruel and it's disgusting, 243 00:16:54,080 --> 00:16:56,160 Speaker 2: and it just happens over and over and people are 244 00:16:56,160 --> 00:17:01,040 Speaker 2: complaining about target you know, being closed down, and it's like, 245 00:17:01,480 --> 00:17:03,200 Speaker 2: but you didn't say anything about the black people that 246 00:17:03,240 --> 00:17:05,400 Speaker 2: were being killed. Earlier this week was the ninety ninth 247 00:17:05,400 --> 00:17:11,080 Speaker 2: anniversary of the Black Wall Street massacre or the Tulsa bombings, 248 00:17:11,160 --> 00:17:15,200 Speaker 2: right where white people came in and destroyed one of 249 00:17:15,280 --> 00:17:19,879 Speaker 2: the wealthiest black communities in Tulsa, Oklahoma. And it's pretty 250 00:17:19,880 --> 00:17:23,000 Speaker 2: wild that we're at this point in the world right now, 251 00:17:23,280 --> 00:17:27,400 Speaker 2: ninety nine years later. I mean, let that sink in right. 252 00:17:28,119 --> 00:17:33,480 Speaker 1: Damn near one hundred years later and we're still dealing 253 00:17:33,520 --> 00:17:38,160 Speaker 1: with this. Our lives are still in danger. 254 00:17:38,680 --> 00:17:40,560 Speaker 2: I just have to read this one last week because 255 00:17:40,800 --> 00:17:42,920 Speaker 2: it's so true, but it also tickled me a bit 256 00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:46,480 Speaker 2: and before we dive into some of the you know, 257 00:17:46,520 --> 00:17:48,679 Speaker 2: the things that we should keep in mind moving forward. 258 00:17:49,200 --> 00:17:49,879 Speaker 4: So let's see. 259 00:17:49,920 --> 00:17:54,040 Speaker 2: Her name is Sadie Baby on Twitter, and Sadie Baby says, 260 00:17:54,400 --> 00:17:57,720 Speaker 2: the reason you don't see cops shutting down kkk rallies 261 00:17:57,840 --> 00:18:00,320 Speaker 2: is the same reason you don't see Hannah Monten and 262 00:18:00,440 --> 00:18:02,240 Speaker 2: Mightley Cyrus sitting in the same room. 263 00:18:02,680 --> 00:18:03,000 Speaker 3: Girl. 264 00:18:03,359 --> 00:18:05,520 Speaker 4: But I saw that and I lost it. 265 00:18:05,560 --> 00:18:10,239 Speaker 2: I was like, yeah, goddamn right, Okay. 266 00:18:08,800 --> 00:18:09,520 Speaker 4: Yes, you know that. 267 00:18:09,680 --> 00:18:12,679 Speaker 2: In the day they said that the KKK infiltrated the 268 00:18:12,680 --> 00:18:15,600 Speaker 2: police force. Like come on, y'all, like, come on, now, 269 00:18:16,040 --> 00:18:17,480 Speaker 2: this is the state of the world. This is where 270 00:18:17,480 --> 00:18:18,520 Speaker 2: we're at right now. 271 00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:20,920 Speaker 4: This is where we are at. 272 00:18:21,359 --> 00:18:23,920 Speaker 1: One of the things that I do want to point out, 273 00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:28,480 Speaker 1: I want to be clear is that we're not saying 274 00:18:29,440 --> 00:18:32,720 Speaker 1: that all white people are bad, even though I would 275 00:18:32,720 --> 00:18:36,880 Speaker 1: hope that that's understood right, We're not saying that. 276 00:18:38,280 --> 00:18:40,200 Speaker 4: All cops are bad. 277 00:18:41,119 --> 00:18:46,000 Speaker 1: And I can particularly speak from that standpoint having a 278 00:18:46,200 --> 00:18:50,000 Speaker 1: sister and a cousin who are in law enforcement, who 279 00:18:50,080 --> 00:18:50,959 Speaker 1: are cops. 280 00:18:51,720 --> 00:18:52,320 Speaker 4: They're black. 281 00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:59,359 Speaker 1: We all, i'm sure know, within our six degrees of separation, 282 00:19:00,880 --> 00:19:06,600 Speaker 1: know a black cop. And while we know that not 283 00:19:06,920 --> 00:19:12,480 Speaker 1: all cops are bad. What is happening right now through 284 00:19:12,520 --> 00:19:19,679 Speaker 1: the hands of cops is part of a larger system issue, 285 00:19:20,000 --> 00:19:25,680 Speaker 1: and that is what everyone out here protesting, everyone out 286 00:19:25,680 --> 00:19:32,760 Speaker 1: here writing essays and holding webinars and doing all the 287 00:19:32,840 --> 00:19:35,400 Speaker 1: things to show their different level of activism. And we'll 288 00:19:35,440 --> 00:19:37,360 Speaker 1: talk more about what that really looks like a little 289 00:19:37,400 --> 00:19:40,920 Speaker 1: bit later. But each and every person who is out 290 00:19:40,920 --> 00:19:45,680 Speaker 1: here speaking up against this is not saying that all 291 00:19:45,760 --> 00:19:49,399 Speaker 1: cops are bad. What we are trying to communicate is 292 00:19:49,400 --> 00:19:54,040 Speaker 1: that there is a larger systemic issue that needs to change, 293 00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:59,720 Speaker 1: point blank period. Our quote unquote justice system in a 294 00:19:59,760 --> 00:20:06,439 Speaker 1: minas America is fucked. Our justice system in America needs 295 00:20:06,560 --> 00:20:17,040 Speaker 1: significant overhaul. Our justice system in America continuously perpetuates racism 296 00:20:17,280 --> 00:20:23,560 Speaker 1: and white supremacy. And until our overall justice system changes, 297 00:20:24,800 --> 00:20:31,880 Speaker 1: black people will continue to experience racial trauma. Things will 298 00:20:31,920 --> 00:20:35,680 Speaker 1: not change for us until the overall system changes. 299 00:20:36,440 --> 00:20:40,560 Speaker 2: You better say that time, you better preach. Okay, you're preaching. 300 00:20:40,640 --> 00:20:43,080 Speaker 2: It's a fact. It's the truth. It's the truth that 301 00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:45,600 Speaker 2: may be uncomfortable for some people, but it is the truth, 302 00:20:45,720 --> 00:20:47,359 Speaker 2: and the truth will set you free. And this is 303 00:20:47,400 --> 00:20:50,360 Speaker 2: the time where the things that have happened. I mean, 304 00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:53,639 Speaker 2: there's a shift taking place, and we are you know, 305 00:20:53,680 --> 00:20:56,840 Speaker 2: they always say that the revolution won't be televised. This 306 00:20:56,920 --> 00:20:59,280 Speaker 2: is the revolution, this is it, And I know it 307 00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:01,280 Speaker 2: might seem scared. I know for myself, I'm just like, 308 00:21:01,320 --> 00:21:03,000 Speaker 2: I'm not ready for this. What's going on? Why is 309 00:21:03,040 --> 00:21:06,760 Speaker 2: this happening? This is it? And I think that there 310 00:21:06,800 --> 00:21:08,760 Speaker 2: are things that we're going to discuss today that can 311 00:21:08,840 --> 00:21:11,399 Speaker 2: make that pill a bit easier to swallow. And we 312 00:21:11,440 --> 00:21:14,240 Speaker 2: want to give you some tips and resources on next 313 00:21:14,240 --> 00:21:17,040 Speaker 2: steps and where you fit in and what your role 314 00:21:17,160 --> 00:21:19,159 Speaker 2: might be. I do want to also say, Dom, I 315 00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:20,720 Speaker 2: agree with you as far as what you said about 316 00:21:20,760 --> 00:21:22,760 Speaker 2: cops and also white people. There are good white people 317 00:21:22,800 --> 00:21:24,600 Speaker 2: out there, There are good allies. There are people that 318 00:21:24,640 --> 00:21:26,760 Speaker 2: are doing the work, and I've had some people reach 319 00:21:26,800 --> 00:21:28,360 Speaker 2: out to me that are putting their money where their 320 00:21:28,359 --> 00:21:32,160 Speaker 2: mouth is. They are helping to fund the grassroots organizations 321 00:21:32,200 --> 00:21:36,000 Speaker 2: and organizations that are dedicated to justice for black people 322 00:21:36,040 --> 00:21:38,439 Speaker 2: and people of color, right, And so definitely want to 323 00:21:38,440 --> 00:21:42,119 Speaker 2: put that out there and before we move into things 324 00:21:42,119 --> 00:21:44,679 Speaker 2: that we should keep in mind as we move forward. 325 00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:46,400 Speaker 2: Anything else you want to add their dome. 326 00:21:46,720 --> 00:21:48,680 Speaker 1: One thing I do want to add, I do want 327 00:21:48,720 --> 00:21:52,080 Speaker 1: to acknowledge that we are in the month of June, 328 00:21:52,680 --> 00:21:59,240 Speaker 1: which is LGBTQ Pride Month, and so I want to 329 00:21:59,440 --> 00:22:04,639 Speaker 1: also acknowledge that our LGBTQ black brothers and sisters and 330 00:22:04,800 --> 00:22:11,199 Speaker 1: gender non conforming folks are also experiencing trauma on a 331 00:22:11,240 --> 00:22:15,080 Speaker 1: different level. And so I want to make sure that 332 00:22:15,119 --> 00:22:20,040 Speaker 1: we do take a second to acknowledge that there are 333 00:22:20,240 --> 00:22:27,320 Speaker 1: so many black trans people that get murdered in this 334 00:22:27,480 --> 00:22:31,720 Speaker 1: country and not enough attention gets brought to them and 335 00:22:31,840 --> 00:22:32,800 Speaker 1: their experience. 336 00:22:33,760 --> 00:22:36,560 Speaker 4: And so I want us. 337 00:22:36,440 --> 00:22:41,200 Speaker 1: To make sure that as a black community that we 338 00:22:41,240 --> 00:22:46,920 Speaker 1: are acknowledging all of us that we don't feed into 339 00:22:47,920 --> 00:22:50,679 Speaker 1: what white supremacy would want, which would be for us 340 00:22:50,760 --> 00:22:55,640 Speaker 1: to find ways to divide ourselves, that we acknowledge each 341 00:22:55,680 --> 00:22:59,600 Speaker 1: and every one of us who identifies as black is 342 00:22:59,640 --> 00:23:03,120 Speaker 1: being traumatized, and for a lot of us, we are 343 00:23:03,119 --> 00:23:08,320 Speaker 1: being traumatized on multiple levels on a daily basis, that 344 00:23:08,560 --> 00:23:13,960 Speaker 1: our lives as a black person, our lives are constantly 345 00:23:14,000 --> 00:23:14,520 Speaker 1: at risk. 346 00:23:15,240 --> 00:23:20,080 Speaker 2: Amen to that dome we love all of us for real, Okay, yes, 347 00:23:20,200 --> 00:23:23,320 Speaker 2: And so when it comes to things to keep in 348 00:23:23,320 --> 00:23:26,159 Speaker 2: mind as we move forward, I think one thing that 349 00:23:26,200 --> 00:23:29,239 Speaker 2: we need to remember is that the media, which in 350 00:23:29,240 --> 00:23:32,320 Speaker 2: most cases mainstream media, is the white media. It cannot 351 00:23:32,359 --> 00:23:35,000 Speaker 2: be trusted. So we can't believe everything that we see. 352 00:23:35,040 --> 00:23:37,159 Speaker 2: We have to do our own research. We have to 353 00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:39,840 Speaker 2: be mindful about what we're sharing online because, I mean, 354 00:23:39,880 --> 00:23:41,760 Speaker 2: don we've seen a few stories this week that just 355 00:23:41,840 --> 00:23:44,800 Speaker 2: make you shake your head and discussed, you know, from 356 00:23:44,880 --> 00:23:48,879 Speaker 2: the newscaster where you know, they had an image of 357 00:23:49,080 --> 00:23:52,320 Speaker 2: various people looting, right, and there was one particular image 358 00:23:52,320 --> 00:23:54,560 Speaker 2: where a white woman was looting and she was taking things. 359 00:23:54,560 --> 00:23:56,240 Speaker 2: I think it may have been a target or some store. 360 00:23:56,440 --> 00:23:58,520 Speaker 2: She was taking a bunch of stuff out of the store, 361 00:23:59,000 --> 00:24:02,720 Speaker 2: and the newscast had the audacity to fix her lips 362 00:24:02,760 --> 00:24:07,520 Speaker 2: to say something along the lines of, oh, I believe 363 00:24:07,520 --> 00:24:09,399 Speaker 2: that's a woman. She could be someone that works at 364 00:24:09,400 --> 00:24:11,960 Speaker 2: the store that you know, trying to clean up or something. 365 00:24:12,000 --> 00:24:13,960 Speaker 2: She said, alluding to the fact that the woman on 366 00:24:13,960 --> 00:24:16,119 Speaker 2: the screen was taking things from the store as a 367 00:24:16,160 --> 00:24:18,240 Speaker 2: worker of the store. Down That was ridiculous to me. 368 00:24:18,280 --> 00:24:20,959 Speaker 2: It's like they will promote the images of black people 369 00:24:21,560 --> 00:24:24,080 Speaker 2: that may not necessarily be very flattering, but they won't 370 00:24:24,080 --> 00:24:27,000 Speaker 2: promote the peaceful images, right they won't promote the images 371 00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:28,800 Speaker 2: of white people doing the same thing that black people 372 00:24:28,840 --> 00:24:31,239 Speaker 2: do because they have an agenda, and so we have 373 00:24:31,280 --> 00:24:32,760 Speaker 2: to be mindful about the media. 374 00:24:33,040 --> 00:24:37,359 Speaker 1: And that agenda is one of maintaining white supremacy, point 375 00:24:37,359 --> 00:24:44,880 Speaker 1: blank period. Right, that agenda is often about perpetuating negative 376 00:24:44,960 --> 00:24:51,040 Speaker 1: stereotypes against black folks, and by doing so, they are 377 00:24:51,320 --> 00:24:55,600 Speaker 1: what they are doing is contributing to the implicit bias 378 00:24:55,640 --> 00:25:01,040 Speaker 1: that other people will take in and will be influenced 379 00:25:01,040 --> 00:25:04,479 Speaker 1: by in terms of how they engage and see and 380 00:25:04,520 --> 00:25:08,320 Speaker 1: interact with black folks. Right, so they're looking at that 381 00:25:08,520 --> 00:25:12,159 Speaker 1: image of this woman, this white woman who's being labeled 382 00:25:12,359 --> 00:25:18,119 Speaker 1: as oh, she was an employee, but yet the black 383 00:25:18,240 --> 00:25:22,240 Speaker 1: person who's doing the engaging in the exact same behavior 384 00:25:23,240 --> 00:25:27,479 Speaker 1: is being labeled as a thief. So then what happens 385 00:25:27,520 --> 00:25:31,080 Speaker 1: the next time we walk into target as that as 386 00:25:31,080 --> 00:25:36,200 Speaker 1: a black person, we're going to be followed because the assumption, 387 00:25:36,359 --> 00:25:39,119 Speaker 1: based on what is put out in the media, The 388 00:25:39,200 --> 00:25:45,280 Speaker 1: assumption then is that we are thieves, that we are 389 00:25:45,320 --> 00:25:48,680 Speaker 1: in there to steal. And so, yes, I agree that 390 00:25:48,760 --> 00:25:52,160 Speaker 1: we do need to be mindful of the media that 391 00:25:52,200 --> 00:25:55,760 Speaker 1: we are taking in, and we need to be mindful 392 00:25:55,800 --> 00:25:58,639 Speaker 1: of how much of it we take in. You know, 393 00:25:59,160 --> 00:26:04,640 Speaker 1: I'm engaged the discussion with several folks around sharing of 394 00:26:04,760 --> 00:26:09,879 Speaker 1: videos when black folks are murdered. Personally, I don't watch 395 00:26:10,040 --> 00:26:14,320 Speaker 1: any of the videos, and if I'm on social media, 396 00:26:15,359 --> 00:26:18,640 Speaker 1: I try to scroll past those things because I don't 397 00:26:18,640 --> 00:26:22,199 Speaker 1: want to take that imagery in because that continues to 398 00:26:22,200 --> 00:26:26,480 Speaker 1: traumatize me. And for me, one of the things that's 399 00:26:26,480 --> 00:26:29,639 Speaker 1: important in me, in me doing this work is to 400 00:26:29,680 --> 00:26:34,239 Speaker 1: protect my piece. And so I couldn't even tell you 401 00:26:34,320 --> 00:26:36,879 Speaker 1: the last time I watched a video of a black 402 00:26:36,920 --> 00:26:40,720 Speaker 1: person being murdered, because I can't, like, I have to 403 00:26:40,760 --> 00:26:46,320 Speaker 1: protect my piece, And so I think that for a 404 00:26:46,359 --> 00:26:49,760 Speaker 1: lot of us, you know, you try to watch the 405 00:26:49,800 --> 00:26:53,000 Speaker 1: news and they will replay the video over and over 406 00:26:53,080 --> 00:26:56,800 Speaker 1: and over again, and all that does is retraumatize. 407 00:26:55,960 --> 00:26:59,720 Speaker 2: Us, retraumatized on and I also desensitize people to Black 408 00:26:59,800 --> 00:27:01,480 Speaker 2: Day because I feel like they don't do that same 409 00:27:01,520 --> 00:27:03,920 Speaker 2: thing when it's white people being killed. They try to 410 00:27:03,960 --> 00:27:07,000 Speaker 2: protect that video and not show that instance. And I 411 00:27:07,040 --> 00:27:09,560 Speaker 2: feel like that is what they're trying to do, terrorize 412 00:27:09,640 --> 00:27:12,159 Speaker 2: us and also desensitize us to seeing that, which is 413 00:27:12,280 --> 00:27:15,399 Speaker 2: just devilish, it's despicable. But I would agree with you, Dow. 414 00:27:15,440 --> 00:27:18,240 Speaker 2: I don't watch those videos. You know, I'll see things 415 00:27:18,240 --> 00:27:20,360 Speaker 2: scroll down, I'll scrore down my timeline and I'll see 416 00:27:20,400 --> 00:27:22,119 Speaker 2: things show up. I can't. It's not good for my 417 00:27:22,160 --> 00:27:24,680 Speaker 2: mental health. I know that my mind will replay those 418 00:27:24,720 --> 00:27:27,639 Speaker 2: images over and over and terrorize me and knowing me, 419 00:27:27,720 --> 00:27:29,879 Speaker 2: it'll pop up in my dreams and all that I can't. 420 00:27:29,960 --> 00:27:32,359 Speaker 2: I can't do it. So I'm with you there, totally 421 00:27:32,359 --> 00:27:34,800 Speaker 2: with you there. I would say that the next thing 422 00:27:34,800 --> 00:27:36,879 Speaker 2: that we need to be mindful of is that what 423 00:27:37,080 --> 00:27:41,000 Speaker 2: isn't revealed can't be healed. And I think that in particular, 424 00:27:41,480 --> 00:27:43,639 Speaker 2: I think that white people need to address and acknowledge 425 00:27:43,680 --> 00:27:47,080 Speaker 2: their theft, their sins, the mental illness that many of 426 00:27:47,160 --> 00:27:49,480 Speaker 2: them face. And when I say that, I'm referring to 427 00:27:49,520 --> 00:27:53,359 Speaker 2: white supremacy in particular, but specifically white men. You know 428 00:27:53,880 --> 00:27:55,560 Speaker 2: all the things that they've done in this country. They 429 00:27:55,600 --> 00:27:57,200 Speaker 2: are some of the most dangerous men in this country. 430 00:27:57,200 --> 00:27:59,520 Speaker 2: When you think about the school shootings, right, when you 431 00:27:59,520 --> 00:28:01,919 Speaker 2: think about just public students in general, whether it's at 432 00:28:01,920 --> 00:28:04,600 Speaker 2: a concert hall, whatever it might be, they are typically 433 00:28:04,680 --> 00:28:06,440 Speaker 2: the ones and you notice how when they do it, 434 00:28:06,720 --> 00:28:09,480 Speaker 2: the media, will you bring up the cutest picture of 435 00:28:09,520 --> 00:28:11,040 Speaker 2: them from back when they were a kid and talk 436 00:28:11,040 --> 00:28:13,600 Speaker 2: about how sweet they were. But then when black men 437 00:28:13,720 --> 00:28:16,480 Speaker 2: commit crimes or black people commit crimes, they're thugs. We 438 00:28:16,600 --> 00:28:18,760 Speaker 2: got to be honest, We have to stop with the lies. 439 00:28:19,080 --> 00:28:21,800 Speaker 2: We need to acknowledge what's happening here. We need to 440 00:28:21,840 --> 00:28:25,240 Speaker 2: acknowledge what they've done in the name of eugenics. And 441 00:28:25,280 --> 00:28:27,000 Speaker 2: of course this isn't all white people, right, this is 442 00:28:27,040 --> 00:28:29,399 Speaker 2: the white people that we're referring to, the white supremacists, right, 443 00:28:29,640 --> 00:28:32,560 Speaker 2: the collaborators. What they've done in the name of eugenics, 444 00:28:32,600 --> 00:28:36,600 Speaker 2: white supremacy, planned parenthood, all that it needs to be acknowledged. 445 00:28:37,080 --> 00:28:42,719 Speaker 1: And I think that we as black people need to 446 00:28:42,760 --> 00:28:49,000 Speaker 1: give ourselves permission to assert a boundary that we are 447 00:28:49,160 --> 00:28:55,880 Speaker 1: not going to do the work for anyone else. So, lady, 448 00:28:55,920 --> 00:28:59,160 Speaker 1: as you're listening, you are one of a handful of 449 00:28:59,200 --> 00:29:02,320 Speaker 1: black folks in your office, know that it is not 450 00:29:02,680 --> 00:29:09,800 Speaker 1: your responsibility to provide the anti racism workshop, to provide 451 00:29:10,080 --> 00:29:16,040 Speaker 1: the cultural competence training, to educate the white people and 452 00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:19,000 Speaker 1: other people in your people of color in your office 453 00:29:19,040 --> 00:29:22,720 Speaker 1: on all of the trauma that black people have experienced. 454 00:29:23,720 --> 00:29:30,120 Speaker 1: It is not your responsibility. And if you are taxed 455 00:29:30,680 --> 00:29:35,360 Speaker 1: with that responsibility, I would hope that you feel safe 456 00:29:35,480 --> 00:29:40,360 Speaker 1: enough and comfortable enough in your role that you can 457 00:29:40,440 --> 00:29:48,480 Speaker 1: respectfully decline and make it clear that it is not 458 00:29:48,600 --> 00:29:52,920 Speaker 1: your responsibility. That you are not to do the emotional 459 00:29:53,120 --> 00:29:57,760 Speaker 1: heavy lifting for anyone in your office but yourself. 460 00:29:58,560 --> 00:30:00,600 Speaker 2: It's not fair. It's not fair that you do that 461 00:30:00,680 --> 00:30:03,600 Speaker 2: emotional labor for free. There are people out here who 462 00:30:03,640 --> 00:30:06,360 Speaker 2: do the work. We've mentioned Rachel Kargle, We've had her 463 00:30:06,400 --> 00:30:08,640 Speaker 2: on the show. She's doing the work, in addition to 464 00:30:08,720 --> 00:30:10,800 Speaker 2: a lot of other people that will add in the 465 00:30:10,840 --> 00:30:13,200 Speaker 2: show notes. But it's a lot to expect. 466 00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:16,560 Speaker 4: Just our presence is emotional labor enough. 467 00:30:17,600 --> 00:30:21,440 Speaker 2: Yes, the microaggressions, okay, like all the stuff we have 468 00:30:21,480 --> 00:30:24,400 Speaker 2: to deal with being in spaces where we're outnumber, it's enough. 469 00:30:24,800 --> 00:30:28,440 Speaker 2: We deal with so much. And just kudos to black people. 470 00:30:28,520 --> 00:30:30,280 Speaker 2: Let's just throw that out there real quick, like you 471 00:30:30,360 --> 00:30:32,520 Speaker 2: are so and we've been through so much as a 472 00:30:32,640 --> 00:30:36,120 Speaker 2: people and we continue to thrive to show up. We 473 00:30:36,120 --> 00:30:37,760 Speaker 2: weren't supposed to make it this far. They have a 474 00:30:37,800 --> 00:30:41,000 Speaker 2: system in place that was supposed to prevent us from flourishing. 475 00:30:41,040 --> 00:30:44,760 Speaker 2: We have black millionaires and billionaires and successful people that 476 00:30:44,800 --> 00:30:47,000 Speaker 2: are doing great things in their community, and people that 477 00:30:47,040 --> 00:30:50,440 Speaker 2: are thriving creatively. I mean, people who are holding amazing 478 00:30:50,480 --> 00:30:54,120 Speaker 2: positions that our ancestors would have dreamt of doing. Right, Like, 479 00:30:54,280 --> 00:30:56,160 Speaker 2: so kudos to us, all right, when you look in 480 00:30:56,160 --> 00:30:58,280 Speaker 2: the mirror and you look at that beautiful black face, 481 00:30:58,600 --> 00:31:01,600 Speaker 2: you should be proud. Even though we have, you know, 482 00:31:01,640 --> 00:31:04,040 Speaker 2: this black plight that we experience and all the things 483 00:31:04,040 --> 00:31:06,600 Speaker 2: that we're struggling with, I'm still so proud to be black. 484 00:31:07,720 --> 00:31:08,360 Speaker 4: Definitely. 485 00:31:08,560 --> 00:31:13,840 Speaker 1: As you were saying that, I was doing my wakanda 486 00:31:14,160 --> 00:31:18,440 Speaker 1: and my wakanda greeting. I had my black power fists 487 00:31:18,440 --> 00:31:20,160 Speaker 1: in the air. Like I went through all of that 488 00:31:20,640 --> 00:31:25,040 Speaker 1: as you were talking. Because we are amazing as a people. 489 00:31:26,000 --> 00:31:28,520 Speaker 1: They hate us because they can't beat us. 490 00:31:28,880 --> 00:31:31,320 Speaker 2: Aimen to that, and that leads us to our next thing. 491 00:31:31,320 --> 00:31:34,000 Speaker 2: We're not only here to point out what other communities 492 00:31:34,040 --> 00:31:34,400 Speaker 2: need to do. 493 00:31:34,480 --> 00:31:34,600 Speaker 3: Right. 494 00:31:34,640 --> 00:31:37,160 Speaker 2: We talked a bit about white supremacy and the white 495 00:31:37,160 --> 00:31:39,680 Speaker 2: people that met us no good. But I think another 496 00:31:39,720 --> 00:31:42,000 Speaker 2: part of this journey is we move into this revolution dom. 497 00:31:42,120 --> 00:31:44,560 Speaker 2: You alluded to this earlier. We got to come together 498 00:31:44,600 --> 00:31:48,280 Speaker 2: as black people. We need to address our stuff, the colorism, 499 00:31:48,720 --> 00:31:52,200 Speaker 2: the homophobia, the things that we let divide us, the 500 00:31:52,280 --> 00:31:55,440 Speaker 2: self hate that we were talked through programming with television 501 00:31:55,520 --> 00:31:59,800 Speaker 2: and media, and the experiences that our ancestors had, experiences 502 00:31:59,840 --> 00:32:02,040 Speaker 2: that we've had. We were taught to hate ourselves. We 503 00:32:02,040 --> 00:32:04,719 Speaker 2: were taught not to love our keiky hair and you know, 504 00:32:04,760 --> 00:32:06,880 Speaker 2: some of us may have righter noses. We were taught 505 00:32:06,960 --> 00:32:08,960 Speaker 2: not to like our melon and our dark skin, our 506 00:32:08,960 --> 00:32:12,440 Speaker 2: brown skin or if you're you know, a lighter complexion, 507 00:32:12,440 --> 00:32:14,560 Speaker 2: we were taught not to like that. Maybe you've experienced 508 00:32:14,560 --> 00:32:17,200 Speaker 2: some type of injustice within the black community. Right, we 509 00:32:17,480 --> 00:32:20,640 Speaker 2: have so much that we need to address within the community. Abuse, 510 00:32:20,800 --> 00:32:24,480 Speaker 2: addictions and molestation, guilt, the lack of patience we have 511 00:32:24,640 --> 00:32:27,120 Speaker 2: with one another. Right, this is the time to love 512 00:32:27,160 --> 00:32:29,280 Speaker 2: on us. But I think in order to love on 513 00:32:29,360 --> 00:32:32,280 Speaker 2: us and support us, we have to love ourselves. Because 514 00:32:32,280 --> 00:32:34,400 Speaker 2: if you don't love yourself, and if you don't love 515 00:32:34,480 --> 00:32:37,040 Speaker 2: who you are, it's going to be that much harder 516 00:32:37,080 --> 00:32:40,400 Speaker 2: to love the sister that looks just like you, the 517 00:32:40,480 --> 00:32:43,200 Speaker 2: brother that looks just like you. Right, And it's going 518 00:32:43,240 --> 00:32:44,800 Speaker 2: to be part of our work as a community. So 519 00:32:44,840 --> 00:32:47,440 Speaker 2: I think this is the ideal time to go within 520 00:32:48,120 --> 00:32:50,840 Speaker 2: to understand what are the things that I'm struggling with, 521 00:32:50,880 --> 00:32:53,719 Speaker 2: because I think that we become our best selves that 522 00:32:53,840 --> 00:32:55,720 Speaker 2: allow us to become better for our community. 523 00:32:56,480 --> 00:33:00,760 Speaker 1: Yes, I definitely would agree with that that we can't 524 00:33:01,160 --> 00:33:07,040 Speaker 1: show up for anyone else until we have truly shown 525 00:33:07,120 --> 00:33:08,120 Speaker 1: up for ourselves. 526 00:33:08,240 --> 00:33:08,480 Speaker 4: Right. 527 00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:12,320 Speaker 1: So I can be there, I can be in the building, 528 00:33:13,160 --> 00:33:18,720 Speaker 1: but I'm only gonna be functioning at maybe fifty twenty 529 00:33:18,800 --> 00:33:22,800 Speaker 1: five percent seventy five percent if I haven't truly done 530 00:33:22,840 --> 00:33:28,360 Speaker 1: the work for myself and if I'm not continuously working 531 00:33:28,480 --> 00:33:36,320 Speaker 1: on myself right. And so it's hard work to tap 532 00:33:36,440 --> 00:33:43,400 Speaker 1: into that internalized racism that we may be experiencing, right, 533 00:33:43,480 --> 00:33:48,120 Speaker 1: because that's what colorism is, that's internalized racism. We are 534 00:33:48,240 --> 00:33:54,000 Speaker 1: hating ourselves because of how we've been conditioned in programmed 535 00:33:54,000 --> 00:33:58,440 Speaker 1: through white supremacy, like you stated. And so once we 536 00:33:58,480 --> 00:34:01,520 Speaker 1: get into a space where we are really going within, 537 00:34:02,520 --> 00:34:06,480 Speaker 1: and you can do that through whatever support network works 538 00:34:06,520 --> 00:34:10,520 Speaker 1: for you. For most of us, that truly means going 539 00:34:10,560 --> 00:34:14,760 Speaker 1: to therapy. And we have a recent episode with doctor 540 00:34:14,840 --> 00:34:19,439 Speaker 1: Rita Walker that talks about building up psychological fortitude and 541 00:34:19,680 --> 00:34:21,719 Speaker 1: she has a new book out that we mentioned in 542 00:34:22,120 --> 00:34:26,840 Speaker 1: that episode about addressing mental health within the black community. 543 00:34:26,960 --> 00:34:31,319 Speaker 1: I highly recommend that book if you are in a 544 00:34:31,400 --> 00:34:34,440 Speaker 1: space where you're trying to figure out how do I 545 00:34:34,560 --> 00:34:37,719 Speaker 1: do the work? How do I begin to go within 546 00:34:38,520 --> 00:34:43,480 Speaker 1: and address my stuff so that I can show up fully, 547 00:34:44,040 --> 00:34:47,239 Speaker 1: not just for my community, but to be a better meet. 548 00:34:47,480 --> 00:34:49,719 Speaker 2: Yes, I love that you brought their resource Updom. I'm 549 00:34:49,719 --> 00:34:51,919 Speaker 2: still reading the book and it is a must read 550 00:34:52,040 --> 00:34:55,000 Speaker 2: for everyone. It really is. And I think before we 551 00:34:55,040 --> 00:34:58,160 Speaker 2: move into our next steps and the roles that we play, 552 00:34:58,880 --> 00:35:00,680 Speaker 2: the one thing we do have to member it's the 553 00:35:00,760 --> 00:35:03,160 Speaker 2: sad truth. So get ready for it. It's not necessarily 554 00:35:03,160 --> 00:35:06,359 Speaker 2: the pretty part of this journey. But everyone can't go. 555 00:35:07,280 --> 00:35:10,080 Speaker 2: Everyone will not get the message. And you have to 556 00:35:10,120 --> 00:35:12,320 Speaker 2: remember it takes too much energy to try to pull 557 00:35:12,360 --> 00:35:14,600 Speaker 2: someone up from the ground when you're standing on the chair. 558 00:35:14,840 --> 00:35:17,040 Speaker 2: So if you're already in the right place and you're 559 00:35:17,080 --> 00:35:19,320 Speaker 2: trying to do for our community, everyone's not going to 560 00:35:19,360 --> 00:35:22,040 Speaker 2: get it. And wasting time trying to prove to someone 561 00:35:22,640 --> 00:35:25,600 Speaker 2: and teach them and you know, beg them to come along, 562 00:35:25,680 --> 00:35:28,440 Speaker 2: it's just not going to work. Everyone wasn't meant to go, right, 563 00:35:28,719 --> 00:35:31,040 Speaker 2: It's just not how this works. And so the people 564 00:35:31,560 --> 00:35:33,600 Speaker 2: that are out there doing the work for our community 565 00:35:34,000 --> 00:35:35,759 Speaker 2: just kind of go where the energy flows. You can 566 00:35:35,760 --> 00:35:38,760 Speaker 2: still love them, right, Everyone has their own journey. Everyone 567 00:35:38,840 --> 00:35:41,840 Speaker 2: has their own I want to say, phases of this 568 00:35:42,000 --> 00:35:45,120 Speaker 2: consciousness journey and doing the work right, the journey of 569 00:35:45,160 --> 00:35:47,560 Speaker 2: doing the work, And so I think it is important 570 00:35:47,600 --> 00:35:50,239 Speaker 2: to realize that, you know, sometimes you have to leave 571 00:35:50,280 --> 00:35:53,680 Speaker 2: people be and really just go where the energy is flowing. 572 00:35:53,760 --> 00:35:54,279 Speaker 2: For us. 573 00:35:54,600 --> 00:35:59,680 Speaker 1: Yes, I think that it's okay for everyone. 574 00:35:59,640 --> 00:36:01,760 Speaker 4: Not to come along. 575 00:36:02,560 --> 00:36:08,040 Speaker 1: Right. That we are all in different spaces, like you said, 576 00:36:08,239 --> 00:36:12,280 Speaker 1: in our journey, and when we think about our racial 577 00:36:12,360 --> 00:36:17,600 Speaker 1: identity development, where we are in that development depends on 578 00:36:17,640 --> 00:36:23,120 Speaker 1: our own unique experiences. And so for those of us 579 00:36:23,560 --> 00:36:27,359 Speaker 1: who are in a space where we're diving in and 580 00:36:27,400 --> 00:36:29,680 Speaker 1: we're doing the work and we know who we are 581 00:36:29,719 --> 00:36:33,360 Speaker 1: and we you know, we really are fully aware of 582 00:36:33,440 --> 00:36:35,480 Speaker 1: who we are and we're proud of who we are, 583 00:36:36,480 --> 00:36:41,960 Speaker 1: it's okay for us to keep doing that work and 584 00:36:42,040 --> 00:36:45,920 Speaker 1: not expect those who aren't where we are to come along. 585 00:36:46,239 --> 00:36:50,439 Speaker 1: Like you said, that is part of what makes us 586 00:36:51,360 --> 00:36:56,200 Speaker 1: so diverse within our own community and I know that 587 00:36:56,280 --> 00:37:01,480 Speaker 1: sometimes that that can truly be infuriating. Right that you 588 00:37:01,560 --> 00:37:05,080 Speaker 1: were in this space where you feel you have progressed, 589 00:37:05,800 --> 00:37:08,640 Speaker 1: and you look at maybe some of your friends, or 590 00:37:08,680 --> 00:37:11,160 Speaker 1: some of your family, or just other people that you know, 591 00:37:12,040 --> 00:37:17,040 Speaker 1: and you feel like you're trying to impart the knowledge 592 00:37:17,080 --> 00:37:22,080 Speaker 1: that you've gained with them, and you feel like, Okay, 593 00:37:22,160 --> 00:37:24,640 Speaker 1: well I've made this progress, so I want to bring 594 00:37:24,719 --> 00:37:29,120 Speaker 1: my village along with me. Like you said, Terry, sometimes 595 00:37:29,800 --> 00:37:31,480 Speaker 1: there are journeys that are meant for us to take 596 00:37:31,520 --> 00:37:37,960 Speaker 1: alan And that doesn't mean that anyone that gets left 597 00:37:38,840 --> 00:37:43,080 Speaker 1: is less than It just means that they are on 598 00:37:43,360 --> 00:37:44,240 Speaker 1: a different path. 599 00:37:44,760 --> 00:37:47,399 Speaker 2: There you go, you hit the nail on the head, Don, 600 00:37:47,760 --> 00:37:50,680 Speaker 2: And I know for me personally, over the weekend, I 601 00:37:50,760 --> 00:37:53,120 Speaker 2: just I kept praying and I was like God, like one, 602 00:37:53,600 --> 00:37:55,919 Speaker 2: why is this happening? And you know, what a time 603 00:37:55,960 --> 00:37:59,200 Speaker 2: to be alive, right to be experiencing this. And when 604 00:37:59,200 --> 00:38:01,919 Speaker 2: Don and I were chatting earlier, I remember me telling you, like, girl, 605 00:38:01,960 --> 00:38:04,200 Speaker 2: we are someone's ancestors in the future, Like we are 606 00:38:04,239 --> 00:38:08,160 Speaker 2: someone's ancestors, and you know, our grandchildren if you have 607 00:38:08,960 --> 00:38:12,200 Speaker 2: you know, just either great grandchildren or great nieces and 608 00:38:12,239 --> 00:38:14,560 Speaker 2: things like that people that are coming after you, your 609 00:38:14,600 --> 00:38:17,440 Speaker 2: descendants don't want to ask you about these times. This 610 00:38:17,520 --> 00:38:20,080 Speaker 2: is history right now, that's in the making. And so 611 00:38:20,160 --> 00:38:22,560 Speaker 2: when I think about that, it just made me think, 612 00:38:22,640 --> 00:38:25,359 Speaker 2: what is my role going to be? You know, what 613 00:38:25,560 --> 00:38:28,600 Speaker 2: role am I playing today? And so I was just 614 00:38:28,600 --> 00:38:30,600 Speaker 2: trying to rack my brain on like okay, you know, 615 00:38:30,680 --> 00:38:32,279 Speaker 2: as you were saying down we got to fill our cup, 616 00:38:32,320 --> 00:38:34,160 Speaker 2: I was like, what am I going to tell my people? 617 00:38:34,200 --> 00:38:35,840 Speaker 2: What am I going to What am I telling myself? 618 00:38:36,360 --> 00:38:38,680 Speaker 2: And so I came up with this little framework for 619 00:38:38,760 --> 00:38:41,520 Speaker 2: us to just figure out options for us on like Okay, 620 00:38:41,560 --> 00:38:43,759 Speaker 2: how can I contribute? I think the main goal And 621 00:38:43,760 --> 00:38:45,120 Speaker 2: I think we may have touched on this either in 622 00:38:45,160 --> 00:38:47,239 Speaker 2: the live down or earlier today, but like you got 623 00:38:47,280 --> 00:38:49,279 Speaker 2: to make sure your cup is full first before you 624 00:38:49,320 --> 00:38:51,239 Speaker 2: take on any other role. That is the priority, like 625 00:38:51,320 --> 00:38:54,520 Speaker 2: you being okay is essential. Did we talk about that 626 00:38:54,560 --> 00:38:55,280 Speaker 2: already done? 627 00:38:55,440 --> 00:38:57,600 Speaker 1: We talked about that in the live Yes, I think 628 00:38:57,640 --> 00:38:59,800 Speaker 1: I did mention it earlier in this episode, but I 629 00:38:59,840 --> 00:39:02,360 Speaker 1: can't stress it enough. Right, So, whether you're hearing it 630 00:39:02,400 --> 00:39:05,920 Speaker 1: again in this episode or you're you're hearing it from 631 00:39:06,000 --> 00:39:08,600 Speaker 1: the live and I know that you've probably heard it 632 00:39:08,719 --> 00:39:14,760 Speaker 1: in some variation in previous episodes from us about making 633 00:39:14,800 --> 00:39:17,920 Speaker 1: sure that your cup is overflowing in order to do 634 00:39:18,000 --> 00:39:23,080 Speaker 1: this work right, that you know what you and I 635 00:39:23,160 --> 00:39:26,040 Speaker 1: t What you and I were talking about was as 636 00:39:26,080 --> 00:39:29,960 Speaker 1: we were identifying what are we going to do. 637 00:39:30,239 --> 00:39:34,360 Speaker 4: As a podcast, right, like, what is our role. 638 00:39:34,640 --> 00:39:41,320 Speaker 1: To embody the title of this podcast right, Healing, Empowerment 639 00:39:41,360 --> 00:39:46,480 Speaker 1: and Resilience. Before we can even dive into that for 640 00:39:46,600 --> 00:39:52,080 Speaker 1: the community, we have to make sure that we are full, 641 00:39:52,160 --> 00:39:57,960 Speaker 1: that our cups are overflowing because when you give to 642 00:39:58,040 --> 00:40:00,719 Speaker 1: someone else, every time you give to someone else, that 643 00:40:00,880 --> 00:40:05,520 Speaker 1: pulls from your cup, and if your cup is empty, 644 00:40:05,600 --> 00:40:07,759 Speaker 1: then that means you really have nothing to give. 645 00:40:08,680 --> 00:40:14,160 Speaker 4: And so before you go into. 646 00:40:14,920 --> 00:40:19,560 Speaker 1: Whatever your role may be, Yes, it is important to 647 00:40:19,600 --> 00:40:24,600 Speaker 1: make sure that your cup truly is overflowing. And how 648 00:40:24,640 --> 00:40:30,320 Speaker 1: your cup can overflow is about self care and self 649 00:40:30,320 --> 00:40:35,880 Speaker 1: care looks different for different people. So for me self 650 00:40:35,920 --> 00:40:39,759 Speaker 1: care this particular week, self care meant having my own 651 00:40:39,800 --> 00:40:43,360 Speaker 1: personal therapy session right the therapist has a therapist, And 652 00:40:44,400 --> 00:40:49,280 Speaker 1: it also meant spending time with family, unplugging from social media, 653 00:40:50,239 --> 00:40:54,720 Speaker 1: limiting my news intake, which I'd already been doing because 654 00:40:54,760 --> 00:40:58,400 Speaker 1: of the pandemic, which we didn't even talk about, and 655 00:40:58,440 --> 00:41:01,200 Speaker 1: that would be a whole nother episode of us diving 656 00:41:01,239 --> 00:41:06,520 Speaker 1: into the impact of the pandemic in all of this, right, 657 00:41:06,719 --> 00:41:10,680 Speaker 1: like this overarching layer. So yes, just making sure that 658 00:41:10,920 --> 00:41:15,840 Speaker 1: your cup is overflowing before you can really do the work. 659 00:41:16,440 --> 00:41:18,880 Speaker 2: Yes, yes, And when we dive into the roles here, 660 00:41:19,360 --> 00:41:21,440 Speaker 2: it's important to know that everyone's role is going to 661 00:41:21,520 --> 00:41:24,560 Speaker 2: look different. It could look different, and you may even 662 00:41:24,600 --> 00:41:27,520 Speaker 2: be taking on multiple roles, right, depending on where you 663 00:41:27,600 --> 00:41:30,280 Speaker 2: are in your life. And so when I think about 664 00:41:30,280 --> 00:41:33,640 Speaker 2: like a mantra for our community or maybe guiding instructions, 665 00:41:33,680 --> 00:41:37,520 Speaker 2: it's how we fight the black plight, right, And so 666 00:41:37,680 --> 00:41:39,879 Speaker 2: plight in this sense is an acronym. Right, your role 667 00:41:39,960 --> 00:41:42,640 Speaker 2: might be being a political worker, and so that might 668 00:41:42,719 --> 00:41:45,440 Speaker 2: mean you advocating for our community in the political realm. 669 00:41:45,560 --> 00:41:49,279 Speaker 2: So not just black faces and high places and they 670 00:41:49,280 --> 00:41:52,120 Speaker 2: don't do anything, but those that are actually doing the work. 671 00:41:52,280 --> 00:41:54,360 Speaker 2: This is something I've been thinking about lately, is you know, 672 00:41:54,400 --> 00:41:57,440 Speaker 2: why are we supporting celebrities who don't say shit when 673 00:41:57,440 --> 00:41:59,839 Speaker 2: we're struggling. Why don't we support these businesses that don't 674 00:41:59,840 --> 00:42:02,719 Speaker 2: even like us. You know that racists create like it 675 00:42:02,719 --> 00:42:06,040 Speaker 2: makes me totally question where I purchase products from. It's 676 00:42:06,160 --> 00:42:08,720 Speaker 2: very difficult should I say to you know, support black 677 00:42:09,040 --> 00:42:11,560 Speaker 2: one hundred percent. But there are companies like you know, 678 00:42:11,560 --> 00:42:13,600 Speaker 2: when you think about things that H and M has 679 00:42:13,640 --> 00:42:15,440 Speaker 2: been in the news for you think about Gucci and 680 00:42:15,480 --> 00:42:17,000 Speaker 2: things like that, it's like, you know, why are we 681 00:42:17,040 --> 00:42:19,359 Speaker 2: giving them our money when they don't even like us. 682 00:42:19,400 --> 00:42:21,279 Speaker 2: So that's just a little tangent, but it's something that 683 00:42:21,320 --> 00:42:22,360 Speaker 2: I thought about, right. 684 00:42:22,719 --> 00:42:26,040 Speaker 1: Yes, I agree, just being yes, being conscious of where 685 00:42:26,120 --> 00:42:27,320 Speaker 1: you put your dollars. 686 00:42:27,760 --> 00:42:29,960 Speaker 2: And so we got political workers, right, that's number one. 687 00:42:30,160 --> 00:42:32,759 Speaker 2: The second would be light workers. Maybe you are all 688 00:42:32,800 --> 00:42:36,839 Speaker 2: about empowering the community, providing support and encouragement, light love, 689 00:42:37,000 --> 00:42:40,080 Speaker 2: emotional support, similar to what we do with the podcast. Right, 690 00:42:40,120 --> 00:42:43,040 Speaker 2: we are light workers. I have not been out protesting, 691 00:42:43,360 --> 00:42:45,520 Speaker 2: and I don't think that's a really good role for 692 00:42:45,600 --> 00:42:47,839 Speaker 2: me personally at this phase in my life. But there 693 00:42:47,880 --> 00:42:50,000 Speaker 2: are other ways I'm supporting and being a light worker 694 00:42:50,000 --> 00:42:53,200 Speaker 2: and providing that inspiration and motivation is important to me. 695 00:42:53,280 --> 00:42:55,160 Speaker 2: It's something that is a strength for me. And so 696 00:42:55,200 --> 00:42:55,839 Speaker 2: that's where we are. 697 00:42:55,960 --> 00:42:56,160 Speaker 3: Right. 698 00:42:56,640 --> 00:42:59,440 Speaker 2: Then you have the eye for investors and funders. These 699 00:42:59,440 --> 00:43:02,279 Speaker 2: are people that in a position to support financially, and 700 00:43:02,320 --> 00:43:04,279 Speaker 2: they support those that are doing the work, whether it's 701 00:43:04,320 --> 00:43:06,800 Speaker 2: grassroots movements or the policy workers. 702 00:43:06,960 --> 00:43:11,640 Speaker 1: Right right, I think that, yeah, those people are necessary, 703 00:43:12,480 --> 00:43:15,080 Speaker 1: just like you know, as you identified like light workers, 704 00:43:15,080 --> 00:43:22,200 Speaker 1: so our doctors, our nurses, our mental health professionals, like 705 00:43:23,160 --> 00:43:28,520 Speaker 1: our you know, certain pastors, certain healers, Like if you 706 00:43:28,520 --> 00:43:30,879 Speaker 1: are a healer in any way, shape or form, you're 707 00:43:30,880 --> 00:43:34,800 Speaker 1: a light worker. Right, You're pouring energy into folks. 708 00:43:34,760 --> 00:43:38,520 Speaker 2: That's right. And then when you think about the next 709 00:43:38,640 --> 00:43:42,640 Speaker 2: role would be a grid protector. It's a network of 710 00:43:42,640 --> 00:43:44,920 Speaker 2: people that protect the community. And I think one of 711 00:43:44,920 --> 00:43:47,560 Speaker 2: the learnings from the Black Wall Street massacres that we 712 00:43:47,640 --> 00:43:50,920 Speaker 2: didn't have a military base to protect ourselves as a 713 00:43:50,920 --> 00:43:53,680 Speaker 2: community when the white people came to the town and 714 00:43:53,719 --> 00:43:57,200 Speaker 2: began to wreck havoc on our community. And so I 715 00:43:57,200 --> 00:44:00,200 Speaker 2: think having protection that is key. Having people that are 716 00:44:00,360 --> 00:44:04,200 Speaker 2: protecting us is key. And so next we have the hawks. 717 00:44:04,440 --> 00:44:06,160 Speaker 2: And when you think about the hawks, right, these are 718 00:44:06,200 --> 00:44:09,719 Speaker 2: the people that are tapped into their intuition. They are 719 00:44:09,760 --> 00:44:13,640 Speaker 2: strategically out in the streets and online advocating for the 720 00:44:13,640 --> 00:44:17,240 Speaker 2: community with purpose, intention, and strategy. They're not just packing 721 00:44:17,239 --> 00:44:19,680 Speaker 2: their stuff and doing whatever. They have a game plan 722 00:44:19,719 --> 00:44:22,759 Speaker 2: in place to help the community. And then I would 723 00:44:22,760 --> 00:44:27,040 Speaker 2: say the last role are the teachers and researchers, those 724 00:44:27,080 --> 00:44:30,440 Speaker 2: who are teaching our community about our history, writing books, 725 00:44:31,040 --> 00:44:36,759 Speaker 2: educating us, providing documentaries that uplift the community. And when 726 00:44:36,800 --> 00:44:39,440 Speaker 2: you think about our education system, white people have been 727 00:44:39,440 --> 00:44:42,160 Speaker 2: in charge of educating us for so long, and they 728 00:44:42,160 --> 00:44:44,279 Speaker 2: only taught us what they wanted us to know. And 729 00:44:44,320 --> 00:44:46,279 Speaker 2: that's how the system is created, right, they only teach 730 00:44:46,320 --> 00:44:47,640 Speaker 2: us what they want us to know. I think about 731 00:44:47,840 --> 00:44:50,400 Speaker 2: biblings telling me how there is it? What is it 732 00:44:50,440 --> 00:44:52,520 Speaker 2: called the McGraw hill books. Time is that there are 733 00:44:52,520 --> 00:44:53,480 Speaker 2: those that's. 734 00:44:53,320 --> 00:44:56,160 Speaker 1: One of the yes, that's one of multiple publishers, but 735 00:44:56,280 --> 00:44:59,200 Speaker 1: those McGraw hill tends to be the most problematic. 736 00:44:59,440 --> 00:45:02,280 Speaker 2: What girl She said that they were learning about slavery 737 00:45:02,280 --> 00:45:05,640 Speaker 2: in school and they call them indentured servants, And I said, oh, 738 00:45:05,800 --> 00:45:08,600 Speaker 2: hell to them all, you're not. They're literally rewriting our history. 739 00:45:08,640 --> 00:45:10,200 Speaker 2: And so when you think about your role, there are 740 00:45:10,239 --> 00:45:15,040 Speaker 2: so many different aspects that you can tap into to 741 00:45:15,120 --> 00:45:17,920 Speaker 2: contribute to the betterment of our society. But again we said, 742 00:45:18,239 --> 00:45:20,279 Speaker 2: you have to take care of self first, and then 743 00:45:20,320 --> 00:45:22,560 Speaker 2: figure out which role are you going to occupy. 744 00:45:23,160 --> 00:45:26,040 Speaker 1: And I also want to put out there that you 745 00:45:26,080 --> 00:45:30,000 Speaker 1: know you like as you named all of these different roles, 746 00:45:30,400 --> 00:45:34,040 Speaker 1: that there may be points as you are taking care 747 00:45:34,080 --> 00:45:37,479 Speaker 1: of self that your role might not fit into any 748 00:45:37,520 --> 00:45:40,040 Speaker 1: one of those categories. That your role may simply be 749 00:45:40,200 --> 00:45:46,760 Speaker 1: to be still. Right, And depending on where you are 750 00:45:46,960 --> 00:45:54,440 Speaker 1: in your identity development or your racial identity development, you 751 00:45:54,480 --> 00:45:58,160 Speaker 1: may be in a place where it's not helpful to 752 00:45:59,200 --> 00:46:02,520 Speaker 1: anyone for you to try and engage in the work 753 00:46:02,800 --> 00:46:06,120 Speaker 1: because you may be doing more harm than good. And 754 00:46:06,280 --> 00:46:11,200 Speaker 1: I say that to acknowledge that that's still a role 755 00:46:11,280 --> 00:46:18,200 Speaker 1: to play, too, right, that being still being silent might 756 00:46:18,280 --> 00:46:24,919 Speaker 1: be more beneficial than engaging in the role when you're 757 00:46:25,000 --> 00:46:29,920 Speaker 1: not truly ready or capable and you end up causing harm. 758 00:46:30,000 --> 00:46:32,799 Speaker 1: So to prevent that harm, you stay still and you 759 00:46:32,840 --> 00:46:33,520 Speaker 1: stay silent. 760 00:46:33,600 --> 00:46:34,400 Speaker 4: And that's okay. 761 00:46:34,880 --> 00:46:36,920 Speaker 2: I love it, don I love that you made that distinction, 762 00:46:37,000 --> 00:46:39,120 Speaker 2: because it is important to know that sometimes that you 763 00:46:39,200 --> 00:46:41,200 Speaker 2: know where you are right now in your life, right 764 00:46:41,280 --> 00:46:44,319 Speaker 2: you know what's best for you based on where you 765 00:46:44,360 --> 00:46:46,480 Speaker 2: are in your life. Maybe you're still trying to figure 766 00:46:46,520 --> 00:46:48,200 Speaker 2: that out, right, So maybe the best way to put 767 00:46:48,239 --> 00:46:51,200 Speaker 2: it is you know where you are, and so be 768 00:46:51,280 --> 00:46:53,919 Speaker 2: honest with yourself based on where you are, on how 769 00:46:53,920 --> 00:46:56,400 Speaker 2: you should move forward. And then as far as next steps, 770 00:46:56,440 --> 00:46:57,919 Speaker 2: I know there are some folks that just want something 771 00:46:58,000 --> 00:47:00,719 Speaker 2: actionable that they can do today. We have various next 772 00:47:00,719 --> 00:47:03,640 Speaker 2: steps that you could literally take today. I think the 773 00:47:03,640 --> 00:47:05,319 Speaker 2: first this is one I'm actually going to work on 774 00:47:05,360 --> 00:47:09,240 Speaker 2: two dom as researching grass roots movements in my area 775 00:47:09,680 --> 00:47:11,680 Speaker 2: who are actually doing the work for our people and 776 00:47:11,719 --> 00:47:14,360 Speaker 2: support them. So I'm going to start looking at dedicating 777 00:47:14,400 --> 00:47:17,360 Speaker 2: a portion of my paycheck to the grassroots, whether it's 778 00:47:17,400 --> 00:47:20,359 Speaker 2: helping to bail people out who are protesting, or whether 779 00:47:20,360 --> 00:47:22,239 Speaker 2: it's just people who are doing the work as it 780 00:47:22,280 --> 00:47:25,560 Speaker 2: relates to the injustices that black people experience. That's something 781 00:47:25,600 --> 00:47:28,000 Speaker 2: I'm going to do. So that's one another, and this 782 00:47:28,120 --> 00:47:30,759 Speaker 2: is from These two are from Racial's public address, which 783 00:47:30,760 --> 00:47:34,200 Speaker 2: will add in the show notes understanding the value of 784 00:47:34,360 --> 00:47:38,040 Speaker 2: calling and defunding the police in your area and advocating 785 00:47:38,040 --> 00:47:41,719 Speaker 2: for redirecting those funds to local and community led safety resources. Now, 786 00:47:41,760 --> 00:47:44,680 Speaker 2: I think this one is particularly interesting because if you notice, 787 00:47:45,320 --> 00:47:48,560 Speaker 2: you know, they've sent out the National Guard, and it 788 00:47:48,640 --> 00:47:51,120 Speaker 2: looks like we are in full on war right now 789 00:47:51,120 --> 00:47:53,840 Speaker 2: in our country. But at the same time, during a pandemic, 790 00:47:53,960 --> 00:47:57,960 Speaker 2: doctors don't have masks, and the healthcare workers that need 791 00:47:58,000 --> 00:48:00,680 Speaker 2: resources to serve the community, they don't have what they need. 792 00:48:01,160 --> 00:48:03,000 Speaker 2: And so that's something that's important, like we need to 793 00:48:03,040 --> 00:48:06,200 Speaker 2: make sure that we're funding the people that are helping 794 00:48:06,200 --> 00:48:10,480 Speaker 2: our people, right and not helping to over militarize. That 795 00:48:10,719 --> 00:48:13,600 Speaker 2: is that even a word down over militarized. I'm going 796 00:48:13,680 --> 00:48:17,120 Speaker 2: to check the word down the line. Okay, there we go. Boom, 797 00:48:17,400 --> 00:48:20,760 Speaker 2: we're making out words right now over militarize the police 798 00:48:20,760 --> 00:48:21,960 Speaker 2: forces in our community. 799 00:48:22,600 --> 00:48:26,440 Speaker 1: Yes, And I think that you know, the other piece, 800 00:48:26,600 --> 00:48:31,759 Speaker 1: the other tip is about holding organizations in the businesses 801 00:48:31,760 --> 00:48:34,480 Speaker 1: that we work for or that we that we work 802 00:48:34,560 --> 00:48:38,799 Speaker 1: for and that we purchase products from, accountable, right. And 803 00:48:38,880 --> 00:48:41,680 Speaker 1: so you know, we don't have to get into the 804 00:48:41,680 --> 00:48:44,600 Speaker 1: debate of what I've seen on social media about a 805 00:48:44,719 --> 00:48:48,160 Speaker 1: blackout in July, right, we don't have to get into 806 00:48:48,200 --> 00:48:51,359 Speaker 1: that whole debate about the merits of doing that. 807 00:48:51,719 --> 00:48:54,040 Speaker 4: But I do think that on. 808 00:48:53,920 --> 00:48:58,880 Speaker 1: A general, consistent, day to day basis, it's important for 809 00:48:59,040 --> 00:49:02,399 Speaker 1: us to be conscious of where we are spending our 810 00:49:02,440 --> 00:49:11,200 Speaker 1: dollars and holding those people accountable, those businesses accountable for 811 00:49:11,400 --> 00:49:17,320 Speaker 1: their actions. And in the workplace, you know, inquiring about 812 00:49:17,680 --> 00:49:21,880 Speaker 1: whether or not your employer is speaking up about what's 813 00:49:21,920 --> 00:49:26,440 Speaker 1: happening right now. Again, want to emphasize it's not your 814 00:49:27,040 --> 00:49:30,040 Speaker 1: responsibility to do the emotional labor for them. Not to 815 00:49:30,680 --> 00:49:33,439 Speaker 1: it's not your responsibility to do the research for them 816 00:49:33,800 --> 00:49:38,080 Speaker 1: or make the public statements for them, but holding them 817 00:49:38,080 --> 00:49:42,760 Speaker 1: accountable if they aren't. Then the next tip. We've talked 818 00:49:42,800 --> 00:49:46,040 Speaker 1: about this multiple times in an episode, and again I'm 819 00:49:46,080 --> 00:49:51,080 Speaker 1: gonna stress it again. Self care, make sure that your 820 00:49:51,280 --> 00:49:56,360 Speaker 1: cup is overflowing. And then our final tip is to 821 00:49:56,560 --> 00:50:00,319 Speaker 1: do your own research because we know, like we mentioned 822 00:50:00,360 --> 00:50:07,040 Speaker 1: that our education system is not going to tell us 823 00:50:07,080 --> 00:50:11,040 Speaker 1: everything that we need to know because by not doing so, 824 00:50:11,200 --> 00:50:14,359 Speaker 1: it upholds white supremacy, it keeps the status quo. 825 00:50:15,400 --> 00:50:17,440 Speaker 4: And so making. 826 00:50:17,080 --> 00:50:20,960 Speaker 1: Sure that you are aware of eugenics, looking up Black 827 00:50:21,000 --> 00:50:26,520 Speaker 1: Wall Street, looking up the Haitian Revolution, read and reading 828 00:50:26,560 --> 00:50:30,359 Speaker 1: things like the Art of War, being aware of what 829 00:50:30,800 --> 00:50:35,680 Speaker 1: our black history is, looking up other different movements in 830 00:50:35,719 --> 00:50:40,240 Speaker 1: this country, looking up the work of the Black Panther Party, 831 00:50:41,400 --> 00:50:46,840 Speaker 1: looking up the work of the Nation of Islam, looking 832 00:50:47,000 --> 00:50:54,400 Speaker 1: up information on the civil rights movement, just truly being 833 00:50:54,480 --> 00:51:00,720 Speaker 1: aware of our history. You have to know where you've 834 00:51:00,840 --> 00:51:05,719 Speaker 1: been or know where you've come from in order to 835 00:51:05,920 --> 00:51:06,880 Speaker 1: know where you're going. 836 00:51:08,239 --> 00:51:11,040 Speaker 2: Hey lady, it's Terry here from the Herspace podcast and 837 00:51:11,120 --> 00:51:13,640 Speaker 2: I have a question for you. Do you want to 838 00:51:13,640 --> 00:51:17,040 Speaker 2: start your own podcast? Have you been thinking to yourself? 839 00:51:17,080 --> 00:51:19,440 Speaker 2: You know what, I want to start a podcast, but 840 00:51:19,480 --> 00:51:22,759 Speaker 2: you just haven't taken the leap. If that's you, I 841 00:51:22,880 --> 00:51:27,160 Speaker 2: got you. I'm hosting a free podcasting masterclass where I'm 842 00:51:27,160 --> 00:51:29,680 Speaker 2: going to teach you how to create your own podcasts 843 00:51:29,680 --> 00:51:32,200 Speaker 2: from start to finish. I'll teach you how to format 844 00:51:32,200 --> 00:51:35,160 Speaker 2: your show and pitch great guests. I'll teach you how 845 00:51:35,200 --> 00:51:38,319 Speaker 2: to stand out in the crowd of nearly one million podcasts. 846 00:51:38,360 --> 00:51:40,040 Speaker 2: But I'm also going to teach you how to get 847 00:51:40,080 --> 00:51:42,440 Speaker 2: your mind right. Okay, We're going to talk about how 848 00:51:42,480 --> 00:51:46,760 Speaker 2: to overcome imposture syndrome and how to deal with fear 849 00:51:47,160 --> 00:51:50,800 Speaker 2: on your podcasting journey. So even if you're not tech savvy, 850 00:51:51,239 --> 00:51:54,799 Speaker 2: it's okay. This masterclass is just for you. So visit 851 00:51:54,920 --> 00:51:57,239 Speaker 2: Terry Limax dot com and click on the pink link 852 00:51:57,239 --> 00:51:59,840 Speaker 2: in the middle of your screen and register for my 853 00:52:00,040 --> 00:52:05,520 Speaker 2: free podcasting masterclass. Again. That's Terrylomax dot com T E 854 00:52:06,280 --> 00:52:12,120 Speaker 2: R R I l Omax dot com. I hope to 855 00:52:12,120 --> 00:52:12,600 Speaker 2: see you there. 856 00:52:12,840 --> 00:52:18,040 Speaker 1: Thanks for joining us today in her Space. Please note 857 00:52:18,080 --> 00:52:22,480 Speaker 1: that our show may contain conversations about self health, advice, 858 00:52:22,960 --> 00:52:26,239 Speaker 1: self empowerment, and mental health, but it is by no 859 00:52:26,440 --> 00:52:29,720 Speaker 1: means meant to be a substitute for an ongoing formal 860 00:52:29,800 --> 00:52:34,480 Speaker 1: relationship with a trained mental health provider. If you are 861 00:52:34,520 --> 00:52:37,399 Speaker 1: someone you know is in need of mental health care, 862 00:52:37,920 --> 00:52:42,080 Speaker 1: please visit the Therapy for Black Girls directory Psychology today 863 00:52:42,640 --> 00:52:44,560 Speaker 1: or contact your insurance provider. 864 00:52:45,080 --> 00:52:46,759 Speaker 2: If you liked what you heard and want to keep 865 00:52:46,800 --> 00:52:50,160 Speaker 2: the conversation going, connect with us on Facebook, Instagram, and 866 00:52:50,280 --> 00:52:55,120 Speaker 2: Twitter at her Space podcast or check out our website 867 00:52:55,160 --> 00:52:58,520 Speaker 2: at Herspace podcast dot com. And before we meet again, 868 00:52:59,000 --> 00:53:03,600 Speaker 2: repeat after me, There's something inside of me that's bigger 869 00:53:03,640 --> 00:53:04,719 Speaker 2: than any obstacle. 870 00:53:05,680 --> 00:53:10,160 Speaker 4: We'll see you next week, lady,