WEBVTT - How to Build Self Confidence

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome back to another episode of the Overcomfort Podcast. I

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<v Speaker 1>am your host, Jennica Lopez. Thank you guys so much

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<v Speaker 1>for choosing to listen to this episode today. I'm so

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<v Speaker 1>excited because I wanted to talk about building your self

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<v Speaker 1>confidence and always having power in a room. And what

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<v Speaker 1>I mean by that is, when you walk in a room,

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<v Speaker 1>you want I don't want to say you want to

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<v Speaker 1>be the center of attention, but you kind of want

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<v Speaker 1>people to be like, oh yeah, something's a little different,

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<v Speaker 1>something's a little interesting. Eyes on you and people don't

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<v Speaker 1>know like you're attracting a lot more. But overall, let's

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<v Speaker 1>talk about building your confidence. As somebody that has, oh

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<v Speaker 1>my goodness, has struggled with her weight most of her life.

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<v Speaker 1>I've always been chunky, and I've always you know, it's

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<v Speaker 1>not about physical but I kind of want to give

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<v Speaker 1>some context. This is my personal experience. It may not

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<v Speaker 1>be the same for everybody, but in my personal experience

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<v Speaker 1>where I have lost confidence, where I feel like I

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<v Speaker 1>was very had very low self esteem, are times where

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<v Speaker 1>I was very, very chunky. Obviously, I've been drunking my

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<v Speaker 1>whole life. Getting compared to my sisters, I feel like

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<v Speaker 1>I've said that before. Yeah, where I've just I have

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<v Speaker 1>a hard time, you know, being in comparison. And also

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<v Speaker 1>I think with the type of mother that I have,

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<v Speaker 1>who she is, and with the and the family I'm

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<v Speaker 1>surrounded by, and being just growing up in the spotlight,

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<v Speaker 1>I feel like my confidence was very dimmed and very low.

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<v Speaker 1>I felt like I was constantly judged and looked at

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<v Speaker 1>and I had to be a certain way and all

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<v Speaker 1>these comments and social media and obviously this is my

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<v Speaker 1>profession and what I do, and you know, also you know,

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<v Speaker 1>talking about constructive criticism on our first episode of this season,

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<v Speaker 1>Like this is a journey that I'm constantly learning and

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<v Speaker 1>realizing as I get older, and I feel like everybody

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<v Speaker 1>is in a shift, you know. I feel like the

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<v Speaker 1>world is in a different shift. And I feel like

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<v Speaker 1>this generation, like my age if you guys are my age,

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<v Speaker 1>twenty seven, twenty six, twenty five, you know, around those

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<v Speaker 1>around my age range, like I feel like everyone's kind

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<v Speaker 1>of figuring out what they're doing, because you know, the

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<v Speaker 1>thirties start coming and you start questioning like, Okay, what

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<v Speaker 1>am I doing? Like who am I? Like? You know,

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<v Speaker 1>and that's normal at least for me. I've had friends

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<v Speaker 1>that are you know, are in the same page as

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<v Speaker 1>me or whatever. But I recently feel like I've been

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<v Speaker 1>way more confident about myself and who I am as

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<v Speaker 1>a person. And I think that's where it all begins.

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<v Speaker 1>In order to feel confident, you have to feel good

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<v Speaker 1>with who you are on the inside, your morals, your values,

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<v Speaker 1>what you believe in, how you're doing mentally emotionally. Confidence

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<v Speaker 1>starts there, and obviously that's hard because it's like, Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm Christian, these are my beliefs. Okay, I'm secure in that.

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<v Speaker 1>Emotionally okay, great, I'm happy, and it might be hard

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<v Speaker 1>to get there, and I think those are the baby

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<v Speaker 1>steps that you have to start taking in order to

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<v Speaker 1>build up your confidence. Okay, cool, you've already got that

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<v Speaker 1>on lock. Physical, I mean mental, emotional, and having a

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<v Speaker 1>firm foundation in your beliefs, in your heart and who

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<v Speaker 1>you are. You focus on your strength and your accomplishments. Next,

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<v Speaker 1>don't focus on your weakness is what you're not good at.

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<v Speaker 1>Focus on This is kind of like a see the

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<v Speaker 1>glass half fool. I think that's what it is, Yes,

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<v Speaker 1>half fool type of scenario where it's like you got

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<v Speaker 1>to see the good in things. You got to see

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<v Speaker 1>the good in yourself before you can exert that. And

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<v Speaker 1>the whole point and purpose is to start feeling good

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<v Speaker 1>on the inside. You start practicing positive talk. You have

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<v Speaker 1>to motivate yourself. If no one else is motivating you,

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<v Speaker 1>you got to be your main motivator, guiding you and

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<v Speaker 1>leading you. And then from there you surround yourself with

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<v Speaker 1>good and supportive people. You know, you can't be surrounded

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<v Speaker 1>with people that are just bashing you, talking shit on you,

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<v Speaker 1>or that just see the negative things in you, or

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<v Speaker 1>always have a comment or an opinion or some type

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<v Speaker 1>of nothing. You know, you guys are probably understanding what

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<v Speaker 1>I'm saying, but you just it's best to stay away

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<v Speaker 1>from those people because, yeah, at the end of the day,

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<v Speaker 1>it is just going to be. You can't let them

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<v Speaker 1>dim your light. You can't let people just go ahead

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<v Speaker 1>and boss you around and just because they don't like

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<v Speaker 1>something whatever. No, you have to be so secure and

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<v Speaker 1>so set and positive in who you are as a

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<v Speaker 1>person that nothing else matters. You know, you've worked so

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<v Speaker 1>hard to get to this point. I've worked so hard

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<v Speaker 1>to get to this point. When I'm in my confidence,

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<v Speaker 1>like I feel like, I'm not taking anything. If you

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<v Speaker 1>don't like the way I talk, Okay, you have a

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<v Speaker 1>comment to say about me, Okay, you don't like what

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<v Speaker 1>I believe in, you don't like what I say? Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>I like who I am. I know who I am

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<v Speaker 1>when I walk into a room. I am no longer

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<v Speaker 1>scared of what people have to say about me, or

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<v Speaker 1>about what they think about me or you know, I'm secure.

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<v Speaker 1>I feel good about myself. And then it goes to

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<v Speaker 1>what you are. What you feel on the insight is

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<v Speaker 1>also what you attract. You know, if you're feeling confident,

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<v Speaker 1>you're going to attract confident, welcoming people a boyfriend or

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<v Speaker 1>the husband, whatever, Like you attract those type of people.

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<v Speaker 1>You I start just kind of wandering and going to

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<v Speaker 1>other greater places. Like when you start feeling confident, you

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<v Speaker 1>start seeing better things, you start seeing positive You're like,

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<v Speaker 1>I want to go here next, I want to go

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<v Speaker 1>do this. I'm gonna get this job, I'm going to

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<v Speaker 1>buy this car, I'm going to set this goal, et cetera,

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<v Speaker 1>et cetera. Like when you start really just seeing how

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<v Speaker 1>confidence plays out in your life, you be kind of

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<v Speaker 1>become obss Like it just it feels good. And it's

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<v Speaker 1>not like an ego boost. It's not about anything. It's

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<v Speaker 1>just like, I'm humble enough to know that I look good.

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<v Speaker 1>I feel good inside my heart, my body. I'm very content,

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<v Speaker 1>you know what. I feel like. You're not a good

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<v Speaker 1>person if you don't have a good heart. My sister

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<v Speaker 1>always told me this too. Like you, you're not a

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<v Speaker 1>pretty person if you don't have if your heart is ugly.

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<v Speaker 1>It all stems from the inside. Take care of yourself

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<v Speaker 1>on the inside and that's what you show and that's

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<v Speaker 1>who you are on the outside. Okay, you guys, we're

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<v Speaker 1>gonna go on a quick break and we'll be right back.

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome back, you guys. Okay, let's get into it. We're

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<v Speaker 1>gonna keep talking about confidence and here are some tips,

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<v Speaker 1>some huge takeaways. Right. I think definitely Number one for

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<v Speaker 1>me is social media can definitely kill your confidence. It

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<v Speaker 1>is not a pretty place. The world is. I mean,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm sorry it sounds it just it is. The world

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<v Speaker 1>is not a pretty place. And it makes me sad.

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<v Speaker 1>A lot of people. No matter how many times you

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<v Speaker 1>tell people it doesn't kill you to be kind, it

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<v Speaker 1>kills them to be kind because there's always going to

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<v Speaker 1>be comments and people hating on you. And I think

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<v Speaker 1>that that is also part of confidence, that you have

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<v Speaker 1>to be okay with not everybody liking you. That is

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<v Speaker 1>a huge part. That is like something at least for me,

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<v Speaker 1>it's like, okay, I know confidently, like you know what,

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<v Speaker 1>I may not be everybody's favorite person, but I love me.

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<v Speaker 1>I love who I am, I love what I stand for,

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<v Speaker 1>and so that's point number two. Tip number three this

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<v Speaker 1>is definitely for more of my ladies. I'm because obviously

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<v Speaker 1>I'm a lady. I'm speaking as a lady. Taking care

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<v Speaker 1>of yourself. Girls, we already know got to get our

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<v Speaker 1>hair done, obviously if it's in your financial means, but

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<v Speaker 1>if it's not, like there's ways of making it work,

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<v Speaker 1>as a taking care of yourself, getting your petticares, getting

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<v Speaker 1>your nails done, doing your hair, getting wax, do you

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<v Speaker 1>you know, taking care of yourself at least for me

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<v Speaker 1>as a lady, or like making sure I smell good, etc.

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<v Speaker 1>Having good hygiene first of all is huge, and I

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<v Speaker 1>feel like it's like okay when you check those things

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<v Speaker 1>off in your head mentally, like okay, this is you know,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm good, I'm good. I took care of myself. You

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<v Speaker 1>walk into a room better for sure, obviously exercising taking

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<v Speaker 1>care of your health, like trust me. And I hate

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<v Speaker 1>to be that girl. I would always like, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>talk shit about girls like wearing full glam to the gym.

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<v Speaker 1>But now I'm not wearing full GLAMs to the gym.

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<v Speaker 1>But I do like putting on a little concealer, putting

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<v Speaker 1>on a little blush and must care and that's it.

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<v Speaker 1>Call it a day, like and I feel different, and

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<v Speaker 1>I honestly I follow. I think her name is Whitney

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<v Speaker 1>Simmons on TikTok and she is a trainer and she's

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<v Speaker 1>like you, she gets ready for the gym every day

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<v Speaker 1>and it's you know, I used to be like, okay,

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<v Speaker 1>that's a lot of time. I'd rather just get to

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<v Speaker 1>the gym. But no, honestly, I've tried it once and

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<v Speaker 1>I would. She really inspired me. It's like it really

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<v Speaker 1>changes you work out better, like you just feel better.

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<v Speaker 1>And I know it sounds ridiculous, but girls try it

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<v Speaker 1>at least once. Try it out. See you know if

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<v Speaker 1>you like it or not. But I do. I like it.

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, let me do my skin care. I

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<v Speaker 1>can Sailer're my pleasure. That's it, and I feel really cute. Anyways,

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<v Speaker 1>you walk in, you feel confident. Take care of yourself,

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<v Speaker 1>take care of your body. Exercise, don't only exercise the outside,

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<v Speaker 1>but definitely exercise the inside your heart and your mind.

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<v Speaker 1>Where are you feeding it? Are you have a spiritual foundation?

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<v Speaker 1>Are you going to church? Are you surrounded by toxic behavior?

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<v Speaker 1>Are your boundary set? Did you pray today? Have you

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<v Speaker 1>rested well? Have you drink water? Those are all little

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<v Speaker 1>details and things that make a huge impact when you

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<v Speaker 1>are on the road to self confidence and looking for better. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>you guys, We're gonna go in a quick break and

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<v Speaker 1>we'll be right back. Welcome back, you guys. These are

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<v Speaker 1>all things that I love and know and practice as

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<v Speaker 1>well in my personal daily life. I'm not going to

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<v Speaker 1>give advice where I don't what I don't truly believe in.

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<v Speaker 1>And this is something I do believe in and definitely

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<v Speaker 1>have learned and grown from. And I again, we're all

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<v Speaker 1>learning as we grow. Right now, in the space of confidence,

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<v Speaker 1>I know that I do not care what people think

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<v Speaker 1>about me anymore, what they say about my body, what

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<v Speaker 1>they say about what I do et cetera. And I

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<v Speaker 1>love that about my life. I love that I can

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<v Speaker 1>walk freely knowing that I'm confident in myself and what

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<v Speaker 1>I believe in, and I do not care what my

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<v Speaker 1>family says. I do not engage, and you know, I

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<v Speaker 1>know where I belong and it's super important to know that.

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<v Speaker 1>And I think another thing is I'll get it, and

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<v Speaker 1>this end it on this humble yourself, check yourself, remind

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<v Speaker 1>yourself every day. You know, is my heart good? Is

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<v Speaker 1>my mind good? Where am I? You know? Having confidence

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<v Speaker 1>also brings you know, you get on a little high horse.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, you gotta come down. You got to be humble.

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<v Speaker 1>You're not you know, I'm not saying like money and

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<v Speaker 1>all this stuff. There's people you know that are in

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<v Speaker 1>a high horse in that sense. But also you know,

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<v Speaker 1>you got to align yourself and know that maybe some

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<v Speaker 1>people aren't on the same page as you. And it's

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<v Speaker 1>good to have those healthy conversations and to address things

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<v Speaker 1>and help people also like be on the same path

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<v Speaker 1>as you. A lot of people may not understand like

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<v Speaker 1>some choices or decisions, and obviously, like for example, if

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<v Speaker 1>you set boundaries, a lot of people won't like it.

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<v Speaker 1>And that is definitely okay, you know, but you have

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<v Speaker 1>to respect everybody as well. You have to know that

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<v Speaker 1>you're not the only person there's you know, relationships aren't easy,

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<v Speaker 1>so it's like having boundaries and understanding each other and

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<v Speaker 1>still growing together. And yeah, that's pretty much you guys.

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<v Speaker 1>I know, today was a short one. I love doing

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<v Speaker 1>these little audio ones because I feel like they're like

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<v Speaker 1>my little personal diaries and I can just talk and vent.

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<v Speaker 1>But yeah, I just I felt it on my heart

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<v Speaker 1>that maybe, you know, somebody needed a word of confidence today,

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<v Speaker 1>and I want to let you guys know that I

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<v Speaker 1>believe in you. I'm with you, guys. We are in

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<v Speaker 1>this together. I believe in every single person that's listening

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<v Speaker 1>or watching this episode today. You got this. You're gonna

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<v Speaker 1>get out of that dark hole. You're gonna get out

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<v Speaker 1>of that mess, and you're gonna walk and be free.

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<v Speaker 1>You're wonderfully and beautifully and fearfully made. And know that

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<v Speaker 1>I love you and the world loves you. And always

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<v Speaker 1>remember to be kind to one another. Make sure you

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<v Speaker 1>guys also like comment and subscribe and I will see

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<v Speaker 1>you guys next Tuesday. Bye you. Overcome for podcasts is

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<v Speaker 1>a production of Iheartmichael podcast Network