WEBVTT - Parmesan Is Overrated! 

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<v Speaker 1>This might be the most controversial thing I've ever said.

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<v Speaker 1>Parmesan cheese is overrated. Parmesan cheese is overrated.

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<v Speaker 2>The Fred show is on. It's over for me. It's done.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't get it. I don't get it.

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<v Speaker 1>People who like more and more and more like they

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<v Speaker 1>make the waiter just sit there and grind it, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>grate it over their plate for an hour.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't get it. Why are we doing that?

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<v Speaker 3>Cause it's good.

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<v Speaker 2>But how much do you need? There's no limit.

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<v Speaker 1>Right.

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<v Speaker 2>How much time we got? Keep on rolling that little

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<v Speaker 2>cheese later. Lay it on, baby. So, yeah, you're the person.

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<v Speaker 2>You're the person.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I try to look away and act like I

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<v Speaker 3>forgot a little bit. So it's like, oh, oh, you

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<v Speaker 3>can stop now.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm sorry.

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<v Speaker 4>But really, I was thinking about it the whole time.

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<v Speaker 2>That's got to be the most annoying. Keep going.

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<v Speaker 1>If you're in the service industry and you actually serve tables,

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<v Speaker 1>is that the most annoying thing?

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<v Speaker 2>No.

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<v Speaker 1>It's like just having to stand over someone's plate with

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<v Speaker 1>the pepper thing or whatever.

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<v Speaker 2>And it's like.

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<v Speaker 1>it's like you know normally it's three three clicks of

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<v Speaker 1>it that's normally enough for most people but then some

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<v Speaker 1>psychos want like a half of one and someone 80

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<v Speaker 1>of them you know you're just standing over the thing

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<v Speaker 1>i remember one time they uh i ordered i went

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<v Speaker 1>to some fancy restaurant with somebody who was rich paying

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<v Speaker 1>for it it was like a record label or something

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<v Speaker 1>i didn't have the money for this and and i

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<v Speaker 1>ordered something a salad of some kind and they bring

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<v Speaker 1>it it's like deconstructed and they're like would you like

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<v Speaker 1>us to prepare this for you and i'm like Okay.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know what that means.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>You know?

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<v Speaker 1>And so the guy like reaches over my shoulder and

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<v Speaker 1>just mixes it on the plate for me.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay. I got it.

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<v Speaker 1>Like, I didn't know if you were going to light.

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<v Speaker 2>It on fire. Like, I didn't know. Right.

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<v Speaker 1>Like, I didn't know if there was some sort of

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<v Speaker 1>explosion that, you know, they're going to light some fireworks.

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't know what you meant by that. I don't

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<v Speaker 1>know if you were adding something to it. No, he

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<v Speaker 1>just stood there and like started mixing it. And I'm like, okay, no,

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<v Speaker 1>like I don't.

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<v Speaker 3>He said, open up.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>You're coming to the airplane. Right.

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<v Speaker 1>Right. It's embarrassing because everyone's like, what is the preparation?

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<v Speaker 1>I'm like, I don't know what he's doing. Give me

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<v Speaker 1>my spoon back. But that's all he did was just.

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<v Speaker 4>That's like that guy on Waiting by the Phone who

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<v Speaker 4>had the waitress cutting his meat.

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<v Speaker 3>I don't know if you remember. He never learned to

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<v Speaker 3>cut because he had a single mom.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, that's right.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah. I never learned to cut meat because I have

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<v Speaker 1>a single mom. Yeah. I had a single mom for

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<v Speaker 1>a while. She taught me how to cut my steak myself.

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<v Speaker 3>Mine didn't, but you don't hear me crying about it,

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<v Speaker 3>but yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, okay. Wow. Morning, Kaylin.

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<v Speaker 1>Good morning.

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<v Speaker 2>You were never taught how to cut meat?

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<v Speaker 3>No, and now my mom roasts me for it, and

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<v Speaker 3>I'm like, babe, you were the one who was supposed

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<v Speaker 3>to teach me.

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<v Speaker 2>What? I don't understand. How do you cut meat?

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<v Speaker 4>Like, I don't know how to, like, I don't know how,

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<v Speaker 4>you guys do it real cool, like, with this. Oh, yeah,

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<v Speaker 4>it looks like I'm, like, sawing at it. Yeah, I

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<v Speaker 4>can't do that. So I just am, like, pulling things apart. Like,

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<v Speaker 4>it's really embarrassing.

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<v Speaker 2>Wait, seriously?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 3>Can you teach me, Dad?

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<v Speaker 4>Uh-huh.

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<v Speaker 1>How do you look cool doing? Are you sharpening your

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<v Speaker 1>own knife before the thing? What are you doing, Jason?

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<v Speaker 1>People elegantly hold a knife with one finger and kind

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<v Speaker 1>of like.

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<v Speaker 2>What are you talking about?

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<v Speaker 4>Really?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I'm like stab. I'm a savage.

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<v Speaker 3>I cut like this. I'm using the handle like this.

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<v Speaker 2>It looks like I don't... I didn't know you didn't

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<v Speaker 2>know how to cut meat. I can show you. Can

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<v Speaker 2>you teach me? I'm being serious.

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<v Speaker 1>The way European people eat looks much more elegant than

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<v Speaker 1>the way that we eat. Like, you know, how they'll

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<v Speaker 1>hold their fork or their knife differently. It looks way better.

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<v Speaker 1>But I don't know how to do that. But I

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<v Speaker 1>can cut a piece of food and put it in

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<v Speaker 1>my mouth. Yeah, I am capable of that. My single

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<v Speaker 1>mom did teach me that while she was single. It

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<v Speaker 1>was a brief time. Luckily, my dad came around to

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<v Speaker 1>teach me how to wipe my butt because there wasn't

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<v Speaker 1>time for both.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, that's true.

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<v Speaker 3>Not in the same.

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<v Speaker 2>Did anyone teach you that?

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<v Speaker 3>You know, I'm good there, as you know. I'm super clean.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know. As you spoke about on the show.

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<v Speaker 2>Don't you know? I can't be sure. I'm not 100

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<v Speaker 2>on that. As you well know, Fred.

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<v Speaker 3>As we spoke about.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>Every time Caitlin gets mad at me, she puts her

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<v Speaker 1>raw butt on my face. Don't act like the rest

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<v Speaker 1>of you don't do it, too. Every time people get mad.

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<v Speaker 2>Fred, come here for your punishment.