1 00:00:00,400 --> 00:00:02,720 Speaker 1: The time I found out my family lied to me 2 00:00:02,920 --> 00:00:06,000 Speaker 1: for nineteen years. And this comes from the real angry 3 00:00:06,080 --> 00:00:08,720 Speaker 1: beev You know how after you turn sixteen you were 4 00:00:08,760 --> 00:00:11,559 Speaker 1: so excited to be in adults. I didn't really get 5 00:00:11,600 --> 00:00:14,600 Speaker 1: that till I moved out. My family was full of lives, 6 00:00:15,160 --> 00:00:20,120 Speaker 1: half truths, and unresolved issues. Here's the only one of 7 00:00:20,239 --> 00:00:23,279 Speaker 1: many stories that will haunt my mind. At the age 8 00:00:23,480 --> 00:00:26,759 Speaker 1: of about five to six, my uncle, my dad's brother, 9 00:00:27,040 --> 00:00:29,640 Speaker 1: had a court where my first cousin, his son was 10 00:00:29,680 --> 00:00:32,040 Speaker 1: one of the witnesses. During this time. To keep me 11 00:00:32,159 --> 00:00:34,560 Speaker 1: out of this due to my age, I was sent 12 00:00:34,600 --> 00:00:37,199 Speaker 1: to a birthday party for a friend. Meanwhile, everything in 13 00:00:37,200 --> 00:00:40,040 Speaker 1: my family's life was changing. I was later informed that 14 00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:43,239 Speaker 1: my uncle was going to be serving time in prison 15 00:00:43,400 --> 00:00:46,640 Speaker 1: for selling the Devil's lettuce. Not sure if that was 16 00:00:47,000 --> 00:00:50,080 Speaker 1: all after the nineties or it was in the early nineties. 17 00:00:50,360 --> 00:00:53,040 Speaker 1: I was told my uncle did admit to selling drugs, 18 00:00:53,040 --> 00:00:56,200 Speaker 1: but the rest was like falsely accused. From then on 19 00:00:56,400 --> 00:00:59,320 Speaker 1: until age of sixteen, every other weekend we would spend 20 00:00:59,360 --> 00:01:02,240 Speaker 1: time going prison to visit my uncle, which of course 21 00:01:02,320 --> 00:01:04,480 Speaker 1: caused me to have a friendship with him. We even 22 00:01:04,560 --> 00:01:08,039 Speaker 1: became penpals and wrote letters to each other about things 23 00:01:08,080 --> 00:01:11,040 Speaker 1: we like to do, like going karting, laser tag and 24 00:01:11,040 --> 00:01:13,520 Speaker 1: stuff like that. This continued for many years, and then 25 00:01:13,720 --> 00:01:16,800 Speaker 1: my family met my now husband. The same was also 26 00:01:16,840 --> 00:01:18,800 Speaker 1: said about him my uncle, and we moved on. After 27 00:01:18,840 --> 00:01:21,160 Speaker 1: getting married, I moved out of state, which happened to 28 00:01:21,160 --> 00:01:23,920 Speaker 1: be the same time my uncle got out of prison. 29 00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:26,920 Speaker 1: I never really communicated with him at all back then. 30 00:01:26,959 --> 00:01:29,440 Speaker 1: In twenty fifteen and my husband moved back to the state, 31 00:01:29,480 --> 00:01:31,200 Speaker 1: and then I hadn't seen my first cousins at the 32 00:01:31,240 --> 00:01:32,800 Speaker 1: court date, and so I was like five or six. 33 00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:36,120 Speaker 1: I hadn't seen him about nineteen years. My grandparents and 34 00:01:36,200 --> 00:01:38,360 Speaker 1: parents weren't allowed to see him, and it was all 35 00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:41,200 Speaker 1: explained that my cousin's mother didn't want to see him 36 00:01:41,280 --> 00:01:43,680 Speaker 1: at all. My grandparents would still buy Christmas presents for 37 00:01:43,760 --> 00:01:45,800 Speaker 1: him every year in case we decided to stop by 38 00:01:45,840 --> 00:01:48,280 Speaker 1: and see him again. It was a touchy subject every like, 39 00:01:48,360 --> 00:01:51,320 Speaker 1: but something everybody wanted to do. So basically, the uncle 40 00:01:51,760 --> 00:01:55,559 Speaker 1: is in prison and everyone's like kind of seeing him 41 00:01:55,560 --> 00:01:57,800 Speaker 1: but kind of not wanting to as well. One day, 42 00:01:57,920 --> 00:02:01,440 Speaker 1: while I'm pregnant, I'm scrolling through Facebook and I see 43 00:02:01,480 --> 00:02:03,800 Speaker 1: what I believe to be my cousin on Facebook. With 44 00:02:03,880 --> 00:02:06,440 Speaker 1: my heart beating in my throat, I sent him a 45 00:02:06,440 --> 00:02:08,359 Speaker 1: message because we used to be close. We used to 46 00:02:08,400 --> 00:02:10,440 Speaker 1: play Batman and Batgirl together, and we used to do 47 00:02:10,480 --> 00:02:12,640 Speaker 1: all the things that little cousins do at a young age, 48 00:02:12,680 --> 00:02:15,360 Speaker 1: like jump and play power Rangers. I finally decided that 49 00:02:15,400 --> 00:02:17,119 Speaker 1: I'm going to send him a message. So I send 50 00:02:17,160 --> 00:02:18,720 Speaker 1: him a message stating that I don't know if he 51 00:02:18,760 --> 00:02:20,760 Speaker 1: remembers me, but I love to meet with him and 52 00:02:20,800 --> 00:02:23,280 Speaker 1: I love to know him again. But there were no expectations. 53 00:02:23,320 --> 00:02:26,600 Speaker 1: To my surprise, he actually replied and said that he 54 00:02:26,600 --> 00:02:28,560 Speaker 1: would love to meet up and we would meet at 55 00:02:28,600 --> 00:02:31,680 Speaker 1: a restaurant. But beforehand, I called my parents to let 56 00:02:31,680 --> 00:02:33,400 Speaker 1: them know that I was going to see him, but 57 00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:35,240 Speaker 1: not tell anyone else because I didn't want to get 58 00:02:35,240 --> 00:02:37,040 Speaker 1: their hopes up. My dad told me that due to 59 00:02:37,120 --> 00:02:39,359 Speaker 1: him being with his mother for so long, that she 60 00:02:39,520 --> 00:02:42,480 Speaker 1: probably would give him false information about what happened around 61 00:02:42,520 --> 00:02:45,839 Speaker 1: the time, but to believe what he said and take 62 00:02:45,919 --> 00:02:48,440 Speaker 1: him for what he remembers. So basically, OHP is like, 63 00:02:48,800 --> 00:02:51,960 Speaker 1: am I potentially getting all this false information about my 64 00:02:52,000 --> 00:02:54,840 Speaker 1: family that I had no idea about So here I 65 00:02:54,880 --> 00:02:57,560 Speaker 1: go with my husband, me very pregnant, go to meet 66 00:02:57,600 --> 00:03:00,200 Speaker 1: him for the first time since everything happened. This is 67 00:03:00,240 --> 00:03:02,040 Speaker 1: like the first time she's going to see this cousin, 68 00:03:02,480 --> 00:03:04,760 Speaker 1: like since I think he went to prison. We had 69 00:03:04,800 --> 00:03:08,560 Speaker 1: a great time talking and conversing until unfortunately the subject 70 00:03:08,560 --> 00:03:10,840 Speaker 1: of his father came up. My cousin did let me 71 00:03:10,919 --> 00:03:13,639 Speaker 1: know that the uncle did indeed do everything he was 72 00:03:13,680 --> 00:03:16,840 Speaker 1: accused of, and shared in detail that she doesn't want 73 00:03:16,840 --> 00:03:19,200 Speaker 1: to share about. My cousin gave me his first hand 74 00:03:19,280 --> 00:03:21,919 Speaker 1: memory of these events and was very sympathetic and apologetic 75 00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:23,639 Speaker 1: that I had to find out. This way to put 76 00:03:23,680 --> 00:03:25,400 Speaker 1: it lightly, if you put his last name in a 77 00:03:25,440 --> 00:03:27,800 Speaker 1: website for the state, he's the second one on it. 78 00:03:27,840 --> 00:03:31,960 Speaker 1: Because I think there was some abuse that happened too. 79 00:03:32,520 --> 00:03:34,640 Speaker 1: I felt like a fool here. I came to see 80 00:03:34,720 --> 00:03:37,480 Speaker 1: him with these preconceived notions as my head that he's 81 00:03:37,520 --> 00:03:39,960 Speaker 1: just been fed a bunch of flies. After talking and 82 00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:43,120 Speaker 1: apologizing profusely for all that he's been through, I offered 83 00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:45,240 Speaker 1: him if he ever wants to talk to anyone from 84 00:03:45,240 --> 00:03:47,720 Speaker 1: the family, that he is welcome to on any terms, 85 00:03:47,760 --> 00:03:50,040 Speaker 1: and he can use me to do so, but nothing 86 00:03:50,080 --> 00:03:53,240 Speaker 1: is expected. After coming home from the restaurant, feeling emotionally drained, 87 00:03:53,240 --> 00:03:55,240 Speaker 1: realizing my uncle was not who I thought he was, 88 00:03:55,320 --> 00:03:56,840 Speaker 1: I think to call my father to tell him what 89 00:03:56,880 --> 00:03:59,680 Speaker 1: I've learned. I felt devastated, not just for me, but 90 00:03:59,720 --> 00:04:01,480 Speaker 1: for my father to learn that his brother was this 91 00:04:01,520 --> 00:04:04,480 Speaker 1: horrible monster and that he's beparading himself to be such 92 00:04:04,480 --> 00:04:07,360 Speaker 1: a good guy, because basically he's like I was innocent 93 00:04:07,440 --> 00:04:10,200 Speaker 1: of all the abuse stuff that they convicted me of, 94 00:04:10,320 --> 00:04:13,280 Speaker 1: but he was not cool. I was heartbroken to have 95 00:04:13,320 --> 00:04:15,440 Speaker 1: to make the phone call. I call my dad in 96 00:04:15,440 --> 00:04:17,600 Speaker 1: a very soft voice, I say something along the lines 97 00:04:17,600 --> 00:04:20,640 Speaker 1: of Dad, I talked to my cousin and uncle did everything. 98 00:04:20,680 --> 00:04:23,919 Speaker 1: I'm so sorry. My heart was beating. I was terrified 99 00:04:24,200 --> 00:04:26,640 Speaker 1: how hurt my dad would be. He's a very delicate 100 00:04:26,680 --> 00:04:29,040 Speaker 1: person to be broken and cry, but to my surprise, 101 00:04:29,080 --> 00:04:30,760 Speaker 1: he didn't. That's when he told me, oh, pee, when 102 00:04:30,800 --> 00:04:32,720 Speaker 1: I went to visit your uncle in prison one time, 103 00:04:33,040 --> 00:04:35,960 Speaker 1: he admitted this to me and your cousin and he 104 00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:38,720 Speaker 1: admitted that what he did was right, that it was 105 00:04:38,760 --> 00:04:41,200 Speaker 1: all true. And the dad didn't say anything. Yeah, they 106 00:04:41,200 --> 00:04:42,360 Speaker 1: didn't say anything. They kind of covered it. 107 00:04:42,440 --> 00:04:42,600 Speaker 2: Up. 108 00:04:42,839 --> 00:04:46,160 Speaker 1: I was shocked. All I could say was okay, then 109 00:04:46,240 --> 00:04:48,080 Speaker 1: made an excuse to get off the phone. How can 110 00:04:48,160 --> 00:04:50,280 Speaker 1: my father have lied to me all these years about that? 111 00:04:50,320 --> 00:04:52,360 Speaker 1: How could he knowingly put me in the same room 112 00:04:52,440 --> 00:04:55,240 Speaker 1: as someone like that to visit a prison. How could 113 00:04:55,240 --> 00:04:56,920 Speaker 1: he let me have a relationship with someone like this? 114 00:04:57,080 --> 00:04:59,600 Speaker 1: How could he be spending time with the uncle once 115 00:04:59,600 --> 00:05:01,240 Speaker 1: he got ou a prison? And why was the whole 116 00:05:01,240 --> 00:05:04,239 Speaker 1: family acting if everything like as if everything was forgiven. 117 00:05:04,320 --> 00:05:06,200 Speaker 1: I think, like a lot of families probably just like 118 00:05:06,200 --> 00:05:08,359 Speaker 1: brush these kinds of things under the rust. Yeah, a 119 00:05:08,440 --> 00:05:09,640 Speaker 1: terrible thing to do, no. 120 00:05:09,640 --> 00:05:12,040 Speaker 3: Because like, of course, like the drug, like this drug 121 00:05:12,040 --> 00:05:14,279 Speaker 3: stuf is not the late issue at all, Like the 122 00:05:14,320 --> 00:05:16,720 Speaker 3: fact that you know people are in jail for that, 123 00:05:16,720 --> 00:05:20,240 Speaker 3: that's crazy. But to lie like which is my maybe 124 00:05:20,240 --> 00:05:22,920 Speaker 3: what OP thought or you know, OP thought was the 125 00:05:22,960 --> 00:05:24,440 Speaker 3: only thing that they did wrong, and then to find 126 00:05:24,440 --> 00:05:25,120 Speaker 3: out that it's just. 127 00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:28,880 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, it's terrible. So now the cousin is getting 128 00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:31,880 Speaker 1: invited to family events and opis I just want to 129 00:05:31,920 --> 00:05:33,240 Speaker 1: know if I should feel if I'm in the right 130 00:05:33,279 --> 00:05:35,840 Speaker 1: to keep my children away. Should I talk stop going 131 00:05:35,839 --> 00:05:37,880 Speaker 1: to all these family events unless I know my uncle 132 00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:39,720 Speaker 1: is not going to be there, and what are some 133 00:05:39,800 --> 00:05:41,760 Speaker 1: things I can do to make my cousin know I 134 00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:44,719 Speaker 1: will always have his back. So I don't know what 135 00:05:44,760 --> 00:05:45,240 Speaker 1: do you guys think. 136 00:05:45,320 --> 00:05:48,360 Speaker 3: I think definitely you can create distance with this person, 137 00:05:48,440 --> 00:05:50,159 Speaker 3: and I think you have to. I think, yeah, showing 138 00:05:50,200 --> 00:05:52,480 Speaker 3: your support for your cousin is very important. I'm on 139 00:05:52,520 --> 00:05:54,440 Speaker 3: a trip with a friend and I want to send 140 00:05:54,480 --> 00:05:57,520 Speaker 3: her home. Cheryl, who goes by brilliant Argument ninety eight, 141 00:05:57,600 --> 00:06:00,880 Speaker 3: says I fifty five female am a one day six 142 00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:03,760 Speaker 3: of a five week RV trip with a friend forty 143 00:06:03,880 --> 00:06:09,520 Speaker 3: nine female who has health issues including five BROMI. 144 00:06:09,440 --> 00:06:12,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, good crushing that keep going fibro mail. 145 00:06:12,400 --> 00:06:15,039 Speaker 3: Yeah that's I don't know what that is? 146 00:06:15,040 --> 00:06:16,400 Speaker 1: Is that? Let us the comments. 147 00:06:16,640 --> 00:06:20,800 Speaker 3: I am miserable. I am participating in four juried art shows, 148 00:06:21,040 --> 00:06:23,760 Speaker 3: the first being this coming weekend because of my home situation. 149 00:06:23,920 --> 00:06:26,320 Speaker 3: I am mid divorce. This trip is do or die 150 00:06:26,440 --> 00:06:28,839 Speaker 3: for me. It's the difference between me living the life 151 00:06:28,839 --> 00:06:31,200 Speaker 3: I want to live or did you go back to 152 00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:33,520 Speaker 3: a grind that I'm not really prepared to go back to. 153 00:06:33,880 --> 00:06:35,280 Speaker 1: Oh, he is like living the best. 154 00:06:35,440 --> 00:06:37,640 Speaker 3: You're doing art shows and so this trip is trying 155 00:06:37,640 --> 00:06:40,360 Speaker 3: to get uh like make them successful. 156 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:44,119 Speaker 1: I guess like the art show, like they're trapping the Okay, cool. Yeah. 157 00:06:44,160 --> 00:06:46,400 Speaker 3: The idea is that being in our RV, we can 158 00:06:46,400 --> 00:06:49,000 Speaker 3: sleep for free at rest areas, truck stops, et cetera. 159 00:06:49,160 --> 00:06:51,880 Speaker 3: In many cases, you can also sleep at Walmart, Crocker Bill, 160 00:06:52,040 --> 00:06:54,719 Speaker 3: or Costco parking lots, as long as there's not a 161 00:06:54,760 --> 00:06:58,039 Speaker 3: city ordinance against it. Another overnight option would be to 162 00:06:58,040 --> 00:07:00,599 Speaker 3: stay a campsite. Campsites allow us to hook up to 163 00:07:00,640 --> 00:07:04,000 Speaker 3: electricity and water, but they often require reservations and cost 164 00:07:04,080 --> 00:07:06,600 Speaker 3: some money. Because the mileage on the RV is so bad, 165 00:07:06,680 --> 00:07:10,160 Speaker 3: I'm trying to get as many free overnights as possible. Also, 166 00:07:10,160 --> 00:07:12,440 Speaker 3: because of the home situation, I had to bring my 167 00:07:12,440 --> 00:07:15,320 Speaker 3: two late middle aged dogs with me. She as in 168 00:07:15,440 --> 00:07:21,400 Speaker 3: the friend hates them. Of course. The RV has a bathroom, shower, microwave, stove, oven, 169 00:07:21,480 --> 00:07:22,880 Speaker 3: and several sleeping areas. 170 00:07:23,040 --> 00:07:24,240 Speaker 1: Okay, that sounds like a sick RV. 171 00:07:24,400 --> 00:07:26,920 Speaker 3: That sounds fun. Yeah, I'm trying to be understanding and 172 00:07:26,960 --> 00:07:29,600 Speaker 3: respectful of her health issues. The problem is she's being 173 00:07:29,720 --> 00:07:32,840 Speaker 3: super demanding, barking orders at me and expecting me to 174 00:07:32,880 --> 00:07:35,800 Speaker 3: do everything she spends literally the entire time that I 175 00:07:35,840 --> 00:07:39,040 Speaker 3: am driving laying down listening to an audiobook because she 176 00:07:39,040 --> 00:07:41,200 Speaker 3: can't stand my music or podcast choices. 177 00:07:41,280 --> 00:07:43,960 Speaker 1: Oh so she's like not even participating. Why should drive? 178 00:07:44,080 --> 00:07:46,680 Speaker 1: Right there? I will forgive her if she's listening to 179 00:07:46,760 --> 00:07:48,760 Speaker 1: our podcast. Yeah, yeah, you could only be listening to 180 00:07:48,760 --> 00:07:50,640 Speaker 1: OKOB that's it only reason. 181 00:07:50,720 --> 00:07:53,640 Speaker 3: Yeah, here are some stories. The morning after night one her, 182 00:07:53,880 --> 00:07:57,080 Speaker 3: this is the friend I slept terribly. Me Why is 183 00:07:57,120 --> 00:07:59,800 Speaker 3: that her? This indicates road noise? 184 00:08:01,880 --> 00:08:04,480 Speaker 1: That's what do you want Cheryl to do? 185 00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:05,920 Speaker 3: You're driving? 186 00:08:06,040 --> 00:08:11,560 Speaker 1: You're driving, here's the one driving. This is a great story. 187 00:08:11,680 --> 00:08:14,720 Speaker 1: I love this story. Thanks to the okop fam forgiving 188 00:08:14,800 --> 00:08:15,480 Speaker 1: us some great story. 189 00:08:15,520 --> 00:08:17,280 Speaker 3: I'm gonna make. I'm gonna do your voice. 190 00:08:17,880 --> 00:08:22,240 Speaker 1: I slept terribly, terribly. 191 00:08:22,320 --> 00:08:24,400 Speaker 3: And then and then she says, well, I think we 192 00:08:24,440 --> 00:08:26,960 Speaker 3: should get you some earbuds because I think this is 193 00:08:26,960 --> 00:08:29,720 Speaker 3: a potential problem anywhere we stay. 194 00:08:29,880 --> 00:08:32,400 Speaker 1: Facts because you are on a road trip. 195 00:08:33,240 --> 00:08:36,400 Speaker 3: We should have gone back to Walmart. The Walmart was closed. 196 00:08:36,720 --> 00:08:37,800 Speaker 1: I like to sleep. 197 00:08:38,200 --> 00:08:40,559 Speaker 3: Oh oh, I think that. Okay, they're not driving while 198 00:08:40,559 --> 00:08:42,920 Speaker 3: they're sleeping. It's just the car is passing. 199 00:08:42,679 --> 00:08:44,760 Speaker 1: Right right right. But yeah, that's gonna happen on a 200 00:08:44,800 --> 00:08:47,160 Speaker 1: road trip up. 201 00:08:47,280 --> 00:08:50,560 Speaker 3: So they go to the Walmart parking lot. Yeah, Cheryl, 202 00:08:50,800 --> 00:08:53,160 Speaker 3: I'm just saying there could be other places that aren't 203 00:08:53,240 --> 00:08:55,880 Speaker 3: quiet either, so we should get you something just in case. 204 00:08:56,040 --> 00:08:56,679 Speaker 1: Yeah. 205 00:08:56,880 --> 00:08:59,600 Speaker 3: I tried earbuds once, but they messed up my ears, 206 00:08:59,600 --> 00:09:01,240 Speaker 3: so I won't use them. 207 00:09:01,559 --> 00:09:03,520 Speaker 1: Sophia use his ear plugs all the time. 208 00:09:03,600 --> 00:09:06,080 Speaker 3: I actually been trying to use them less because they 209 00:09:06,080 --> 00:09:08,839 Speaker 3: were no, but but I use them. 210 00:09:09,280 --> 00:09:10,880 Speaker 1: Yeah, you're the problem. 211 00:09:12,200 --> 00:09:14,080 Speaker 3: No, no, no, no, but I used them three months straight 212 00:09:14,080 --> 00:09:16,640 Speaker 3: when I was traveling because obviously, when you're traveling with 213 00:09:16,679 --> 00:09:20,400 Speaker 3: other people and like hostels, they're loud and it's yeah, 214 00:09:20,520 --> 00:09:22,960 Speaker 3: if you are having trouble sleeping, use airbuds. 215 00:09:23,120 --> 00:09:23,560 Speaker 1: Yeah. 216 00:09:23,760 --> 00:09:26,600 Speaker 3: Day two, So we both got little power generators for 217 00:09:26,679 --> 00:09:29,920 Speaker 3: charging jacks, et cetera. I charged mine fully before I left, 218 00:09:29,920 --> 00:09:32,280 Speaker 3: but she did not. Hers came with about thirty three 219 00:09:32,320 --> 00:09:33,719 Speaker 3: percent charge on it. But that's it. 220 00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:34,360 Speaker 2: Her. 221 00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:36,640 Speaker 3: Can we stay at the campground tonight instead of a 222 00:09:36,679 --> 00:09:40,040 Speaker 3: travel center so that we can be hopefully hooked up? Cheryl, 223 00:09:40,400 --> 00:09:42,400 Speaker 3: Why don't you just plug it into the cigarette lighter 224 00:09:42,440 --> 00:09:43,640 Speaker 3: and I'll charge while we drive. 225 00:09:44,200 --> 00:09:47,400 Speaker 1: Great idea, Cheryl, always solving problems. 226 00:09:46,960 --> 00:09:50,400 Speaker 3: Big sigh. She would rather have us find a campground, 227 00:09:50,800 --> 00:09:53,480 Speaker 3: have me fully hook up the electric instead of her 228 00:09:53,600 --> 00:09:55,840 Speaker 3: just standing up so that she can grab her cigarette 229 00:09:55,920 --> 00:09:56,840 Speaker 3: let a lighter charger. 230 00:09:57,000 --> 00:09:58,720 Speaker 1: And the thing is like, she's not helping at all. 231 00:09:58,800 --> 00:09:59,200 Speaker 2: No, she's not. 232 00:09:59,480 --> 00:10:03,200 Speaker 1: She's just sitting but listening to a podcast hopefully. Okayoky 233 00:10:03,920 --> 00:10:05,040 Speaker 1: oy okayop. 234 00:10:05,360 --> 00:10:07,360 Speaker 3: Earlier I had been drifting a bit, so I told 235 00:10:07,400 --> 00:10:09,160 Speaker 3: her I needed to stop and take a rest for 236 00:10:09,200 --> 00:10:12,640 Speaker 3: about twenty minutes. Next thing, I know, can we get going? 237 00:10:12,720 --> 00:10:14,600 Speaker 3: It's been forty five minutes and you said you were 238 00:10:14,640 --> 00:10:17,559 Speaker 3: only going to take twenty. My drifting was actually worse 239 00:10:17,559 --> 00:10:19,679 Speaker 3: after that. Yeah, if you're tired, do not drive. 240 00:10:20,040 --> 00:10:24,000 Speaker 1: Oh she's drifting. Yeah, she's drifting because she's tired. Yeah. 241 00:10:24,120 --> 00:10:26,599 Speaker 3: Take it like, yeah, that is so dangerous. Oh, I 242 00:10:26,679 --> 00:10:29,520 Speaker 3: can't believe she's complaining. Here's a text I sent a 243 00:10:29,520 --> 00:10:33,040 Speaker 3: friend on or around day three. The little power generators 244 00:10:33,040 --> 00:10:36,680 Speaker 3: are from Jackriy. We're now charging hers via the sig lighter. 245 00:10:36,840 --> 00:10:39,439 Speaker 3: Mine is in back. Either the Jackery won't do output 246 00:10:39,520 --> 00:10:42,560 Speaker 3: and input simultaneously, or there's a way to turn hers 247 00:10:42,600 --> 00:10:44,400 Speaker 3: on that we don't know about. We have different models 248 00:10:44,440 --> 00:10:47,800 Speaker 3: about twenty minutes ago. Before we stop, Cheryl says, my 249 00:10:47,880 --> 00:10:49,920 Speaker 3: phone battery is dead. Can I swap out the jackriy 250 00:10:49,960 --> 00:10:52,440 Speaker 3: for a while? Her jackey is up to forty eight percent, 251 00:10:52,840 --> 00:10:56,960 Speaker 3: Her big wine and obvious indication that this is not 252 00:10:57,240 --> 00:11:00,440 Speaker 3: okay Cheryl, okay, Well, I know we need to stay 253 00:11:00,440 --> 00:11:02,640 Speaker 3: on this highway for a long time. A stop to pee, 254 00:11:02,760 --> 00:11:05,199 Speaker 3: let the dogs out, et cetera. I plug my phone 255 00:11:05,200 --> 00:11:07,760 Speaker 3: into my jackery in the back. She agrees to drive 256 00:11:07,840 --> 00:11:10,360 Speaker 3: for a half hour. She gets into the driver's seat. 257 00:11:10,640 --> 00:11:15,000 Speaker 3: I have no note navigation me. It's charging in the back. Her, 258 00:11:15,200 --> 00:11:17,760 Speaker 3: We'll bring it up here. Me, but it's dead and 259 00:11:17,800 --> 00:11:20,640 Speaker 3: the lighter is charging your jackery. I only have like 260 00:11:20,640 --> 00:11:21,600 Speaker 3: two percent matter. 261 00:11:21,840 --> 00:11:25,120 Speaker 1: She sounds so frustrated. Kick her out her Well, I 262 00:11:25,160 --> 00:11:26,360 Speaker 1: didn't know it is that low. 263 00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:29,240 Speaker 3: Fine, I'll use mine now. She's pissed because the charging 264 00:11:29,280 --> 00:11:31,800 Speaker 3: cable's not there, but because it's in the back, she 265 00:11:31,880 --> 00:11:35,240 Speaker 3: grabs my other one, which is u USBC for my iPad. 266 00:11:35,440 --> 00:11:38,480 Speaker 3: Also pissed at that day five, would you be pissed 267 00:11:38,520 --> 00:11:40,960 Speaker 3: off if I hired an organizer for the camper? 268 00:11:41,240 --> 00:11:41,320 Speaker 4: Me? 269 00:11:41,480 --> 00:11:42,240 Speaker 3: Incredulous? 270 00:11:42,400 --> 00:11:42,480 Speaker 4: What? 271 00:11:42,880 --> 00:11:43,160 Speaker 5: Yes? 272 00:11:43,240 --> 00:11:44,040 Speaker 3: Why would you do that? 273 00:11:44,240 --> 00:11:44,520 Speaker 4: Her? 274 00:11:44,760 --> 00:11:47,320 Speaker 3: I found this bin up here and it's full of junk. 275 00:11:47,360 --> 00:11:49,040 Speaker 3: Why don't you just start it up? Why don't she 276 00:11:49,160 --> 00:11:49,600 Speaker 3: start up? 277 00:11:50,280 --> 00:11:53,199 Speaker 1: She's not a problem solver. No, Cheryl's a saint. 278 00:11:53,360 --> 00:11:57,319 Speaker 3: Day six This one actually two takes the cake for context. 279 00:11:57,640 --> 00:12:00,880 Speaker 3: Everyone seems to have issues with something. Some people hate 280 00:12:00,920 --> 00:12:03,559 Speaker 3: anything to do with eyes, et cetera. Personally, I am 281 00:12:03,600 --> 00:12:06,559 Speaker 3: a bit metaphobic, though I did work somewhat through that 282 00:12:06,600 --> 00:12:09,840 Speaker 3: in therapy. Her issues, in addition to from many many things, 283 00:12:09,880 --> 00:12:12,920 Speaker 3: apparently includes having her face near a toilet. Two nights 284 00:12:12,960 --> 00:12:15,080 Speaker 3: before this, she was listening to an audible book where 285 00:12:15,080 --> 00:12:17,960 Speaker 3: the narrator was very explicitly describing vomiting. 286 00:12:18,960 --> 00:12:22,840 Speaker 1: That's not we do not talk about this show. 287 00:12:23,040 --> 00:12:25,120 Speaker 3: Also, a few nights ago, she complained that I was 288 00:12:25,120 --> 00:12:27,000 Speaker 3: listening to a podcast with a guy who had a 289 00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:30,200 Speaker 3: strident voice, Peter Sagel from Wait, Wait, Don't tell Me, 290 00:12:30,720 --> 00:12:33,480 Speaker 3: which bothered her. I made a flipping comment later about 291 00:12:33,480 --> 00:12:35,160 Speaker 3: not listening to people who were professionals. 292 00:12:35,200 --> 00:12:36,880 Speaker 1: Wait, I thought she was going to say it was 293 00:12:36,920 --> 00:12:37,679 Speaker 1: Sam or John. 294 00:12:38,080 --> 00:12:40,679 Speaker 3: Oh, a metaphobic adversity to barf. So this is what 295 00:12:41,480 --> 00:12:42,000 Speaker 3: Cheryl has? 296 00:12:42,280 --> 00:12:45,840 Speaker 1: Oh, Oh, I am so sorry for making that vomiting 297 00:12:45,880 --> 00:12:47,960 Speaker 1: noise because they. 298 00:12:49,200 --> 00:12:52,680 Speaker 3: Oh my god, I hope not Jesus. Okay, Cake Slice 299 00:12:52,800 --> 00:12:55,079 Speaker 3: number one. I needed a poop and I asked her 300 00:12:55,080 --> 00:12:56,760 Speaker 3: to put in earbuds or something so I could have 301 00:12:56,800 --> 00:12:59,760 Speaker 3: some privacy. She first said no, but when I persisted, 302 00:12:59,760 --> 00:13:01,760 Speaker 3: she's that she never wanted to hear me say anything 303 00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:03,439 Speaker 3: about strident voices. 304 00:13:03,480 --> 00:13:06,400 Speaker 1: Again. Strident voice, yeah, because she. 305 00:13:06,440 --> 00:13:09,000 Speaker 3: Was like the guy Peter Segel has a strident voice 306 00:13:09,440 --> 00:13:10,960 Speaker 3: to Cheryl, so weird. 307 00:13:11,160 --> 00:13:11,400 Speaker 1: Weird. 308 00:13:11,559 --> 00:13:14,240 Speaker 3: Cake Slice number two. She hates the onboard bathroom and 309 00:13:14,320 --> 00:13:17,120 Speaker 3: d her credit. It's no picnic, but it serves its purpose. 310 00:13:17,280 --> 00:13:20,440 Speaker 3: But the camp Brown bathroom was about fifty yards away. Anyway, 311 00:13:20,480 --> 00:13:22,440 Speaker 3: I was dealing with stuff outside this morning, and I 312 00:13:22,440 --> 00:13:24,320 Speaker 3: guess she had to go, so she announced that she 313 00:13:24,400 --> 00:13:27,839 Speaker 3: both pete and pooped in the camper bathroom. I congratulated 314 00:13:27,880 --> 00:13:29,959 Speaker 3: her and asked if she had any issues figuring out 315 00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:32,120 Speaker 3: how to flush it. She said no, and I said 316 00:13:32,120 --> 00:13:34,600 Speaker 3: something about remnants and let her know where the toilet 317 00:13:34,600 --> 00:13:38,040 Speaker 3: brush was. She said she refuses to clean the toilet. 318 00:13:38,320 --> 00:13:40,280 Speaker 3: I reminded her that the brush is a handle, so 319 00:13:40,320 --> 00:13:42,080 Speaker 3: it's not like her face will be close to the toilet. 320 00:13:42,400 --> 00:13:45,199 Speaker 3: She still said no. I said I was not interested 321 00:13:45,240 --> 00:13:47,120 Speaker 3: in cleaning up her shit. She says back that she 322 00:13:47,200 --> 00:13:49,640 Speaker 3: has this issue. I don't expect her to lick it clean, 323 00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:52,200 Speaker 3: and she comments back that she pays people to clean 324 00:13:52,200 --> 00:13:54,880 Speaker 3: her toilet. Note that when we left, I reminded her 325 00:13:54,920 --> 00:13:57,520 Speaker 3: that I am not her employee. I told her to 326 00:13:57,559 --> 00:14:01,040 Speaker 3: at least try flushing water down. Apparently that worked. No idea, 327 00:14:01,120 --> 00:14:02,160 Speaker 3: what will happen next time? 328 00:14:02,240 --> 00:14:02,439 Speaker 6: She do? 329 00:14:03,080 --> 00:14:06,640 Speaker 1: Princess? What a princess? Yeah? Yes, Skyla Lewis I would 330 00:14:06,720 --> 00:14:08,800 Speaker 1: end this trip, Jem says, Nope, believe her. At the 331 00:14:08,840 --> 00:14:13,000 Speaker 1: side of the road, Bernie hart Dragon says, poor Cheryl, yeah, 332 00:14:13,240 --> 00:14:15,360 Speaker 1: uh completely agree to her credit. 333 00:14:15,600 --> 00:14:18,520 Speaker 3: She has spotted on driving. She's driving driven about five 334 00:14:18,559 --> 00:14:22,560 Speaker 3: hours total so far. I've driven about thirty affair. 335 00:14:23,120 --> 00:14:26,800 Speaker 1: I don't know if that's I mean, it's something. 336 00:14:27,200 --> 00:14:28,840 Speaker 3: A couple of days ago, she scraped one of those 337 00:14:28,840 --> 00:14:31,760 Speaker 3: protective concrete posts at a gas station and seriously effed 338 00:14:31,840 --> 00:14:32,920 Speaker 3: up the side of the camper. 339 00:14:33,320 --> 00:14:34,720 Speaker 1: No, how much would it be. 340 00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:36,840 Speaker 3: The thing is, she loaned me ten k to help 341 00:14:36,880 --> 00:14:38,480 Speaker 3: me buy the campers, so I kind of had to 342 00:14:38,480 --> 00:14:40,920 Speaker 3: bring her along. At this point, I just want her 343 00:14:40,920 --> 00:14:41,520 Speaker 3: to fly home. 344 00:14:41,800 --> 00:14:44,000 Speaker 1: See don't accept money fou ass hats. 345 00:14:44,200 --> 00:14:44,840 Speaker 3: We did hash it. 346 00:14:44,960 --> 00:14:47,400 Speaker 1: That was a golden rule of okop right there, do 347 00:14:47,520 --> 00:14:49,160 Speaker 1: not accept money from ass hats. 348 00:14:49,480 --> 00:14:51,200 Speaker 3: We did hash it out a little bit this morning, 349 00:14:51,280 --> 00:14:53,520 Speaker 3: but I still don't feel that things are completely resolved, 350 00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:59,760 Speaker 3: because moments later, the same behavior repeated. I'm miserable, help me, okay, family. 351 00:15:00,080 --> 00:15:05,560 Speaker 1: Cheryl, Oh my goodness this. I am so sorry that 352 00:15:05,640 --> 00:15:07,960 Speaker 1: you had to endure it. How did the how did 353 00:15:07,960 --> 00:15:13,120 Speaker 1: it end? Was it like? Cheryl? Wait? Wait, Cheryl, Cheryl, 354 00:15:13,160 --> 00:15:15,040 Speaker 1: do you wanna do you want to call our call 355 00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:17,280 Speaker 1: line really quick? At four four zero five or right 356 00:15:17,320 --> 00:15:20,320 Speaker 1: six pots sixty seven? Hey go yeah, yeah, Cheryl, call 357 00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:21,280 Speaker 1: us right now. 358 00:15:21,320 --> 00:15:21,800 Speaker 7: Cher. 359 00:15:23,720 --> 00:15:30,720 Speaker 1: Cheryl waiting for your call. Chaer, Hello is this Cheryl? 360 00:15:31,080 --> 00:15:31,280 Speaker 4: Yes? 361 00:15:31,560 --> 00:15:35,160 Speaker 1: Yes, hello Cheryl. How's it going? 362 00:15:35,240 --> 00:15:38,880 Speaker 4: Okay? Oh my god, So here's what happens. Here's what 363 00:15:39,000 --> 00:15:39,480 Speaker 4: this happened. 364 00:15:39,560 --> 00:15:41,160 Speaker 1: Okay, yes, so okay. 365 00:15:41,200 --> 00:15:43,920 Speaker 4: So so I'm in the Keys, Flora Keys. 366 00:15:43,960 --> 00:15:46,200 Speaker 2: I drove from Wisconsin to the Keys. 367 00:15:46,240 --> 00:15:49,880 Speaker 1: Oh my god, wow, holy yeah? How many hours is 368 00:15:49,920 --> 00:15:50,440 Speaker 1: that total? 369 00:15:51,120 --> 00:15:52,440 Speaker 7: Twenty four shoes? 370 00:15:53,080 --> 00:15:56,440 Speaker 2: We made this happen, but so so before we're getting 371 00:15:56,480 --> 00:15:57,240 Speaker 2: on our way to hear. 372 00:15:57,200 --> 00:15:58,360 Speaker 4: Because it's a long drive today. 373 00:15:58,520 --> 00:16:00,760 Speaker 7: Yeah, so I said, hey, we should. 374 00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:02,240 Speaker 4: Stop in a truck stop because we were both needed 375 00:16:02,280 --> 00:16:03,320 Speaker 4: to shower on board. 376 00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:06,040 Speaker 2: Shower is where I've stacked all my bins of artwork. 377 00:16:05,720 --> 00:16:08,240 Speaker 1: And shit, right, because it's for the art tour. Yeah. Yeah. 378 00:16:08,280 --> 00:16:09,680 Speaker 4: So she goes, well. 379 00:16:09,680 --> 00:16:11,640 Speaker 2: I really want to get to Tea West so we 380 00:16:11,680 --> 00:16:12,360 Speaker 2: can get settled. 381 00:16:12,520 --> 00:16:13,840 Speaker 4: I said, well, we should side in the truck stop 382 00:16:13,920 --> 00:16:17,040 Speaker 4: so we can goose shower, yeah, laundry. So we get there. 383 00:16:17,440 --> 00:16:20,000 Speaker 2: She's so frustrated with not having a place to shower. 384 00:16:20,360 --> 00:16:23,680 Speaker 2: She actually rented the car to go try to drive around. 385 00:16:23,680 --> 00:16:26,120 Speaker 2: And she's staying in the next two nights in the hostel. 386 00:16:25,920 --> 00:16:27,080 Speaker 7: Because she needed to shower. 387 00:16:27,120 --> 00:16:29,960 Speaker 1: And I'm like, we could have gone to the truck stop. 388 00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:32,840 Speaker 1: All right, real question money, right, So I. 389 00:16:32,760 --> 00:16:34,640 Speaker 4: Owe her ten thousand dollars now. 390 00:16:34,560 --> 00:16:38,400 Speaker 1: For this right in camp. Are you still friends with her? 391 00:16:38,720 --> 00:16:38,800 Speaker 6: Oh? 392 00:16:38,960 --> 00:16:44,720 Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean except well, I'm staying friends with her until. 393 00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:46,520 Speaker 1: Okay, so until you have to pay back to buddy. 394 00:16:47,400 --> 00:16:48,880 Speaker 7: Yeah, well that's what I'm planing. 395 00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:50,200 Speaker 4: I have a home equity loan. 396 00:16:50,680 --> 00:16:53,440 Speaker 2: I'm gonna freaking pay her back like minus all like, 397 00:16:53,600 --> 00:16:55,480 Speaker 2: because she was gonna split the gas and stuff with me, 398 00:16:56,160 --> 00:16:58,720 Speaker 2: but my plan is honestly to like figure out the cost. 399 00:16:58,760 --> 00:16:59,920 Speaker 4: And she straight up the side. 400 00:17:00,040 --> 00:17:03,080 Speaker 2: And berg like pulling out her gas station and like 401 00:17:03,200 --> 00:17:06,160 Speaker 2: this is constantly like I'm I'm working my ass off, 402 00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:08,000 Speaker 2: but she loaned me the money, so I felt like, 403 00:17:08,920 --> 00:17:11,000 Speaker 2: keep talking about next time we're going to do that. 404 00:17:11,040 --> 00:17:14,199 Speaker 4: I'm like, like, a know, next time, lady. Like anyway, 405 00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:17,520 Speaker 4: So my next three shows are around Tampa. 406 00:17:16,960 --> 00:17:18,640 Speaker 7: And I'm really I've been really trying to push. 407 00:17:18,720 --> 00:17:21,600 Speaker 4: I've been saying, hey, you know, I feel like this 408 00:17:21,720 --> 00:17:23,520 Speaker 4: is like bad for your health. Maybe you should go. 409 00:17:23,600 --> 00:17:25,320 Speaker 2: You know, she considers flying home. 410 00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:29,920 Speaker 1: You're like, yeah, don't. 411 00:17:30,040 --> 00:17:33,480 Speaker 2: Be a complete horrible person and say, like, you know, 412 00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:35,480 Speaker 2: I hate you, you know, because. 413 00:17:35,359 --> 00:17:39,760 Speaker 1: Because she did help you out, but it's in my life. Yeah, 414 00:17:40,080 --> 00:17:42,560 Speaker 1: that it is. It is a pickle. It is a 415 00:17:42,560 --> 00:17:43,320 Speaker 1: pickle for sure. 416 00:17:43,840 --> 00:17:47,119 Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, because because I mean, because. 417 00:17:46,840 --> 00:17:48,639 Speaker 2: She's stuck with me to help, right, and I just 418 00:17:49,200 --> 00:17:51,040 Speaker 2: I mean for the next two nights that she stayed 419 00:17:51,040 --> 00:17:51,840 Speaker 2: in the hostel. 420 00:17:51,960 --> 00:17:55,400 Speaker 1: Are you is it still ongoing? Are you like there, 421 00:17:55,840 --> 00:17:56,400 Speaker 1: like are you. 422 00:17:56,359 --> 00:17:58,439 Speaker 4: Oh yeah, oh yeah tomorrow is my first show and 423 00:17:58,440 --> 00:17:59,200 Speaker 4: then I have oh. 424 00:17:59,160 --> 00:18:01,719 Speaker 1: This is like right now, this is happening right now. 425 00:18:02,080 --> 00:18:03,600 Speaker 4: They don't. My god, I need to talk to you guys, know, 426 00:18:03,880 --> 00:18:05,399 Speaker 4: because I don't know what to do. 427 00:18:05,920 --> 00:18:08,720 Speaker 2: Yeah, she's not here tonight because she's staying in this 428 00:18:08,760 --> 00:18:11,479 Speaker 2: freaking costole so that she can shower. 429 00:18:12,000 --> 00:18:16,760 Speaker 1: Oh my okay, oh wow, okay, all right, so we're 430 00:18:17,119 --> 00:18:18,040 Speaker 1: we're guys, we're gonna be. 431 00:18:18,040 --> 00:18:21,080 Speaker 3: Like, so we need we need advice, advice right. 432 00:18:20,920 --> 00:18:24,400 Speaker 1: In the second okay, sorry, right right to to keep track 433 00:18:24,440 --> 00:18:29,520 Speaker 1: of the situation, right, So a little uh, a little background, right, 434 00:18:29,600 --> 00:18:33,320 Speaker 1: So she lent you ten thousand dollars to buy this 435 00:18:33,440 --> 00:18:38,040 Speaker 1: camper van, and then you are doing art shows and 436 00:18:38,080 --> 00:18:42,000 Speaker 1: you're going from uh the what it was to Wisconsin 437 00:18:42,040 --> 00:18:43,800 Speaker 1: to the Florida the Florida Keys, I. 438 00:18:43,760 --> 00:18:45,240 Speaker 7: Thought, So we both live in Wisconsin. 439 00:18:45,320 --> 00:18:47,760 Speaker 2: So my first show was in the Florida Keys im 440 00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:50,160 Speaker 2: in Key West. Right now, I set up the booth 441 00:18:50,200 --> 00:18:51,760 Speaker 2: today with no help from. 442 00:18:51,600 --> 00:18:54,720 Speaker 4: Her, yeah, of course, right, of course. 443 00:18:55,640 --> 00:18:57,960 Speaker 2: And then she'll complain about how she she was so 444 00:18:58,040 --> 00:19:00,720 Speaker 2: tired because she like, she rented this car so she 445 00:19:00,720 --> 00:19:02,720 Speaker 2: could go find a shower or whatever, and so she 446 00:19:02,760 --> 00:19:05,240 Speaker 2: was talking about how exhausted she was and when I 447 00:19:05,280 --> 00:19:08,880 Speaker 2: complained because she got she's picky about her food. So 448 00:19:09,040 --> 00:19:11,159 Speaker 2: she needed to go to some place like outback to 449 00:19:11,240 --> 00:19:14,120 Speaker 2: quote huncot get some vegetables in her which was potatoes. 450 00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:16,439 Speaker 2: I like, potatoes are not a vegetable as far as 451 00:19:16,440 --> 00:19:18,240 Speaker 2: interesting goes, but whatever, and. 452 00:19:18,760 --> 00:19:20,400 Speaker 4: So I said, you know, this is kind of expensive. 453 00:19:20,400 --> 00:19:21,439 Speaker 7: I can't really afford to do this. 454 00:19:21,440 --> 00:19:23,120 Speaker 2: This divorce is causing a lot of money. 455 00:19:22,920 --> 00:19:25,720 Speaker 4: Like we're out of money. And I'm like, you know, 456 00:19:26,760 --> 00:19:27,720 Speaker 4: she goes, well, then you should be. 457 00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:30,160 Speaker 2: Then you should fix update the water because I had 458 00:19:30,160 --> 00:19:31,320 Speaker 2: not dewinterized. 459 00:19:31,359 --> 00:19:33,040 Speaker 4: I can't riette so that you can cook. 460 00:19:33,480 --> 00:19:37,840 Speaker 1: So I feel I feel like it's like she she's 461 00:19:38,040 --> 00:19:41,600 Speaker 1: I feel like she knows almost that She's like, I've 462 00:19:41,640 --> 00:19:44,320 Speaker 1: given you this money, and so she's using it almost 463 00:19:44,359 --> 00:19:47,400 Speaker 1: as like this like manipulation tactic. 464 00:19:47,720 --> 00:19:49,840 Speaker 4: Maybe maybe she's not brought it up. 465 00:19:49,880 --> 00:19:50,600 Speaker 7: I will say that. 466 00:19:50,520 --> 00:19:53,240 Speaker 1: She's not brought up, but I feel like how she's 467 00:19:53,359 --> 00:19:56,639 Speaker 1: hanging over reading you. She's like, oh, I'm expecting to 468 00:19:56,680 --> 00:20:00,040 Speaker 1: be like a princess. I'm expecting you to do everything, 469 00:20:00,080 --> 00:20:02,280 Speaker 1: and I'm expecting you just to take a back seat. 470 00:20:02,720 --> 00:20:04,040 Speaker 1: And so I I mean, I'm saying of. 471 00:20:04,000 --> 00:20:07,000 Speaker 2: Her kind of her only friend is the problem, right, 472 00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:10,280 Speaker 2: And so and she has done like she is the 473 00:20:10,359 --> 00:20:12,879 Speaker 2: kind of person like she'lum me her car like I 474 00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:13,560 Speaker 2: needed to set. 475 00:20:13,480 --> 00:20:14,080 Speaker 4: Up or something else. 476 00:20:14,280 --> 00:20:17,080 Speaker 1: She actually like she's a good friend. But just because 477 00:20:17,119 --> 00:20:18,960 Speaker 1: she like helps you out with these doesn't mean she 478 00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:22,159 Speaker 1: can treat you poorly. And I think, like, right, I 479 00:20:22,160 --> 00:20:25,639 Speaker 1: feel like what the the theme of this episode is 480 00:20:25,640 --> 00:20:28,200 Speaker 1: is about boundaries that we were talking about, like Alex's 481 00:20:28,680 --> 00:20:31,320 Speaker 1: article earlier about like how to set boundaries, and that 482 00:20:31,359 --> 00:20:34,720 Speaker 1: doesn't necessarily mean that you're being ungrateful or anything, you know, 483 00:20:34,760 --> 00:20:38,120 Speaker 1: It's like it's just the means that you don't want 484 00:20:38,119 --> 00:20:40,639 Speaker 1: to be treated like that, right, So I think maybe 485 00:20:40,680 --> 00:20:42,720 Speaker 1: And I said, like one time. 486 00:20:42,600 --> 00:20:46,080 Speaker 2: I dropped her off and so she was going and 487 00:20:46,080 --> 00:20:50,560 Speaker 2: get some snacks and like pull around, let the dogs out, 488 00:20:50,800 --> 00:20:53,280 Speaker 2: and then we should we bought these walking talking so 489 00:20:53,400 --> 00:20:55,960 Speaker 2: she pick me up and I was like, oh, yes, ma'am, 490 00:20:56,800 --> 00:20:58,800 Speaker 2: and then you know, and I had to like maneuver 491 00:20:58,880 --> 00:21:00,639 Speaker 2: the camera to get it back out to right around she. 492 00:21:01,400 --> 00:21:03,160 Speaker 2: I was like, you could have just said hey, I'm ready, 493 00:21:03,240 --> 00:21:05,680 Speaker 2: like pick me up, and hey, I'm ready. 494 00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:09,680 Speaker 1: I think you got to have a conversation where you're 495 00:21:09,680 --> 00:21:14,000 Speaker 1: feeling like, hey, I feel like a little disrespectful. Yeah, yeah, 496 00:21:14,160 --> 00:21:15,200 Speaker 1: I had the conversation. 497 00:21:15,440 --> 00:21:18,959 Speaker 2: She she claims she's not being that way, and then 498 00:21:19,080 --> 00:21:21,240 Speaker 2: I need to understand her health issues. And I'm like, 499 00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:25,040 Speaker 2: I'm trying to understand your health issue, I really and 500 00:21:24,400 --> 00:21:25,560 Speaker 2: I don't. 501 00:21:25,840 --> 00:21:28,159 Speaker 1: But just because he has health issues doesn't mean she 502 00:21:28,440 --> 00:21:31,280 Speaker 1: gets to disrespect you. Like like maybe that means that 503 00:21:31,359 --> 00:21:34,359 Speaker 1: she's not going to like be able to lift heavy 504 00:21:34,400 --> 00:21:37,920 Speaker 1: things or or drive as much, but that doesn't mean 505 00:21:37,960 --> 00:21:40,400 Speaker 1: she gets to complain. And so I feel like, like 506 00:21:40,720 --> 00:21:43,240 Speaker 1: you understanding the health issues, like okay, like that's why 507 00:21:43,359 --> 00:21:46,679 Speaker 1: I drove thirty hours and you drove five. 508 00:21:46,680 --> 00:21:49,119 Speaker 4: You know, And that's and and the thing is she 509 00:21:49,240 --> 00:21:50,840 Speaker 4: wasn't here. It would actually be easy for me. 510 00:21:50,960 --> 00:21:54,359 Speaker 2: Yeah, she wouldn't be taking up this down back space. 511 00:21:54,880 --> 00:21:55,080 Speaker 4: You know. 512 00:21:55,200 --> 00:21:56,879 Speaker 2: Like one of the things I sell are these little 513 00:21:57,760 --> 00:22:01,680 Speaker 2: sewn and quilted footstools, right, and so they're all stored 514 00:22:01,760 --> 00:22:02,840 Speaker 2: under my bed. 515 00:22:04,200 --> 00:22:06,879 Speaker 7: In the back, and I said, hey, if I can, 516 00:22:06,920 --> 00:22:07,199 Speaker 7: I like. 517 00:22:07,280 --> 00:22:09,560 Speaker 2: Handy, see you just put them over there so that 518 00:22:10,000 --> 00:22:11,680 Speaker 2: it's easier instead of me having to go back and forth. 519 00:22:11,720 --> 00:22:13,919 Speaker 4: He's like, I can't do that. I was like, I 520 00:22:13,960 --> 00:22:15,800 Speaker 4: think you can, and She's like, don't tell me what 521 00:22:15,840 --> 00:22:17,840 Speaker 4: I can do. Don't tell me what my limitations are. Like, 522 00:22:18,359 --> 00:22:22,000 Speaker 4: oh my god, I said, I see you seeing your 523 00:22:22,160 --> 00:22:24,680 Speaker 4: your bag up to the lot, like there's a lost area. 524 00:22:25,040 --> 00:22:27,240 Speaker 1: I'm like, I know that you can do that, can you? So, 525 00:22:27,320 --> 00:22:30,440 Speaker 1: like some people in the chat are saying like do 526 00:22:30,440 --> 00:22:33,960 Speaker 1: do like like like should we can we end the 527 00:22:34,400 --> 00:22:37,760 Speaker 1: like should we end that the trip? 528 00:22:38,760 --> 00:22:42,000 Speaker 3: Like maybe you could, yeah, yeah, you need the trip. 529 00:22:42,160 --> 00:22:44,480 Speaker 1: Yeah, well but like or her involvement in the trip 530 00:22:44,560 --> 00:22:45,240 Speaker 1: rather oh. 531 00:22:45,240 --> 00:22:46,720 Speaker 7: Yeah, absolutely, That's what I'm hoping. 532 00:22:46,720 --> 00:22:48,920 Speaker 2: I'm trying to make her think that it's her idea 533 00:22:49,240 --> 00:22:52,760 Speaker 2: and it's for her benefit and not because I'm such 534 00:22:52,760 --> 00:22:53,199 Speaker 2: a d. 535 00:22:53,320 --> 00:22:56,439 Speaker 7: Word, which you know, which I'm not. 536 00:22:56,760 --> 00:22:59,639 Speaker 4: I mean, I'm trying to be so considerate and everyone. 537 00:22:59,680 --> 00:23:01,320 Speaker 2: In a while, I break a little bit and I 538 00:23:01,400 --> 00:23:03,080 Speaker 2: just snap a little yeah. 539 00:23:03,320 --> 00:23:05,919 Speaker 4: Because she's like like like to say, okay. 540 00:23:05,960 --> 00:23:07,960 Speaker 7: This evening, so like I said, she went and stay in. 541 00:23:07,920 --> 00:23:10,600 Speaker 2: This hustle so she could like shower, and I said, hey, 542 00:23:11,520 --> 00:23:13,639 Speaker 2: I texted her because she rented the car to do this. 543 00:23:13,920 --> 00:23:17,840 Speaker 1: Yeah, And I said, I'm going to go. 544 00:23:17,920 --> 00:23:19,119 Speaker 2: I have to go to home people and think up 545 00:23:19,119 --> 00:23:23,280 Speaker 2: another table. Because she said oh, she had forgotten to 546 00:23:23,440 --> 00:23:25,919 Speaker 2: grab a charger for her phone, and I said, if 547 00:23:25,920 --> 00:23:29,520 Speaker 2: you want, I can stop by and you can grab 548 00:23:29,560 --> 00:23:31,159 Speaker 2: the charger, and she goes, well, would it be too 549 00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:34,000 Speaker 2: much trouble to ask you to pick up food? I'm like, actually, yeah, 550 00:23:34,160 --> 00:23:37,320 Speaker 2: because you know parking Key West Park, Pty camper in 551 00:23:37,320 --> 00:23:38,240 Speaker 2: the Key West in the pain. 552 00:23:38,640 --> 00:23:39,600 Speaker 1: Yeah. 553 00:23:39,359 --> 00:23:39,560 Speaker 7: Yeah. 554 00:23:41,080 --> 00:23:43,760 Speaker 1: She's like acting like you're her butler and you are 555 00:23:43,800 --> 00:23:48,600 Speaker 1: not her butler, so she yeah. I think I think 556 00:23:48,720 --> 00:23:51,720 Speaker 1: like if I was to give some like final advice, 557 00:23:52,280 --> 00:23:55,360 Speaker 1: I think it would be probably have another conversation and 558 00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:58,400 Speaker 1: maybe give her the out where it's like I want 559 00:23:58,440 --> 00:23:59,720 Speaker 1: to be on this track. You want to be on 560 00:23:59,760 --> 00:24:02,639 Speaker 1: this because how it's working right now is not working 561 00:24:02,640 --> 00:24:05,600 Speaker 1: for me. And I think Squidney four or five six 562 00:24:06,040 --> 00:24:09,040 Speaker 1: says it best. Don't be afraid to be a bitch 563 00:24:09,080 --> 00:24:11,879 Speaker 1: for your mental health, and like, yeah, sometimes you need 564 00:24:11,880 --> 00:24:14,080 Speaker 1: to be a bad bitch for your mental health, you know. Yeah. 565 00:24:14,160 --> 00:24:16,080 Speaker 2: I mean I'll take money out of the whole equity 566 00:24:16,119 --> 00:24:20,080 Speaker 2: loan and pay her back. I just want the time 567 00:24:20,119 --> 00:24:20,520 Speaker 2: until we. 568 00:24:20,520 --> 00:24:23,479 Speaker 1: Get to You need your mental sanity, you need your 569 00:24:23,480 --> 00:24:24,240 Speaker 1: mental well. 570 00:24:24,280 --> 00:24:26,000 Speaker 7: I don't want it to be unpleasant. 571 00:24:26,440 --> 00:24:29,160 Speaker 2: I don't want to be like super stressful getting back 572 00:24:29,200 --> 00:24:31,760 Speaker 2: to the mainland where I can take to the airport. 573 00:24:32,119 --> 00:24:35,480 Speaker 1: But boundary, I think setting your boundaries this is yeah, 574 00:24:35,480 --> 00:24:37,199 Speaker 1: this is the work trip and like also setting your 575 00:24:37,240 --> 00:24:41,040 Speaker 1: boundaries I think is is well, like will be better 576 00:24:41,040 --> 00:24:43,800 Speaker 1: for you and better for her. So I think that 577 00:24:43,880 --> 00:24:46,000 Speaker 1: deserves another another conversation. 578 00:24:47,240 --> 00:24:49,680 Speaker 4: Yeah, because it didn't really change it to the first one. 579 00:24:49,680 --> 00:24:52,000 Speaker 1: I mean, oh my god, exactly. So that just means 580 00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:53,160 Speaker 1: you need to have another conversation. 581 00:24:53,240 --> 00:24:55,000 Speaker 3: And yeah, I feel like it'll be if you want 582 00:24:55,040 --> 00:24:56,399 Speaker 3: to continue this friendship. 583 00:24:56,040 --> 00:24:57,760 Speaker 1: If you want to continue the center, I think that's. 584 00:24:57,640 --> 00:24:59,640 Speaker 3: The well, that resentment if the conversation. 585 00:24:59,840 --> 00:25:01,679 Speaker 2: But I think yeah, and as I already told her, 586 00:25:01,720 --> 00:25:03,000 Speaker 2: I said I said. 587 00:25:02,800 --> 00:25:03,600 Speaker 4: I'm not having fun. 588 00:25:03,800 --> 00:25:05,200 Speaker 7: Yeah, and this is supposed to be fun. 589 00:25:06,200 --> 00:25:09,160 Speaker 4: I mean it was a lot to do a five. 590 00:25:08,960 --> 00:25:11,359 Speaker 2: Week trip for this first This is my first time 591 00:25:11,400 --> 00:25:14,359 Speaker 2: doing juried art shows, so like a big big deal 592 00:25:14,440 --> 00:25:14,679 Speaker 2: for me. 593 00:25:14,760 --> 00:25:16,760 Speaker 1: You know, well, actually, could could you do? You want 594 00:25:16,760 --> 00:25:19,119 Speaker 1: to shout out your your art for so the Okay 595 00:25:19,359 --> 00:25:21,160 Speaker 1: fam can can support if. 596 00:25:21,080 --> 00:25:23,680 Speaker 4: You go to unspooled w I. 597 00:25:23,840 --> 00:25:28,240 Speaker 1: That's my website, unspooled w I. Okay, we'll check it out. 598 00:25:28,320 --> 00:25:30,919 Speaker 4: U N S p O O l E d w 599 00:25:31,119 --> 00:25:31,960 Speaker 4: I w. 600 00:25:32,040 --> 00:25:36,119 Speaker 1: I W awesome. Well, Cheryl, thank you so much for 601 00:25:36,480 --> 00:25:39,280 Speaker 1: sharing your story on the show and being our first 602 00:25:39,600 --> 00:25:42,040 Speaker 1: live caller that like, like of for the live show. 603 00:25:42,080 --> 00:25:45,680 Speaker 7: That's crazy much and thanks for the sub Thank you. 604 00:25:45,920 --> 00:25:49,919 Speaker 1: Of course. Thank you. Okay, unspoiled Cheryl, We'll talk to 605 00:25:49,920 --> 00:25:52,040 Speaker 1: you soon. Thank you. 606 00:25:52,160 --> 00:25:52,880 Speaker 3: I love you. 607 00:25:54,000 --> 00:26:01,760 Speaker 1: Thank you, Cheryl, thank you. My husband told all his 608 00:26:01,840 --> 00:26:04,119 Speaker 1: friends that he knows I'm but ugly, but what he 609 00:26:04,160 --> 00:26:06,160 Speaker 1: said next made it so much worse. 610 00:26:06,240 --> 00:26:09,480 Speaker 5: I mean, saying someone's but ugly is not just someone 611 00:26:09,800 --> 00:26:11,400 Speaker 5: you're you're significant other. 612 00:26:11,960 --> 00:26:16,520 Speaker 1: I mean that's already pretty crazy. Yeah, but just wait, 613 00:26:16,920 --> 00:26:20,760 Speaker 1: just wait, Okay, I will just wait. I am an 614 00:26:20,880 --> 00:26:26,000 Speaker 1: unattractive woman. Damn, queen, queen, don't do it. Don't do it. 615 00:26:26,040 --> 00:26:30,080 Speaker 1: That's right, that's right. Objectively, I'm unattractive. I've always been 616 00:26:30,080 --> 00:26:33,040 Speaker 1: this way, and while I have accustomed myself to it, 617 00:26:33,040 --> 00:26:36,320 Speaker 1: it nonetheless remains a daily fact that being an ugly 618 00:26:36,359 --> 00:26:41,080 Speaker 1: woman sucks. Yeah, I don't. I don't want to affirm 619 00:26:41,119 --> 00:26:42,080 Speaker 1: it because I don't want to. 620 00:26:42,400 --> 00:26:45,200 Speaker 5: Like, if you affirm it, it's almost like, yeah. 621 00:26:45,080 --> 00:26:47,760 Speaker 1: You're ugly. Yeah, you're crazy. There's so many things that 622 00:26:47,840 --> 00:26:50,600 Speaker 1: go into attraction though. It's not just what you look like, 623 00:26:50,680 --> 00:26:53,360 Speaker 1: it's how you are. Yeah, so you can be attractive 624 00:26:53,520 --> 00:26:59,280 Speaker 1: but ugly. Hey, whoever wants a day op, we'll make 625 00:26:59,320 --> 00:27:02,439 Speaker 1: it happen. I met my husband four years ago. I 626 00:27:02,440 --> 00:27:04,959 Speaker 1: guess the husband wants a dato pee. And he is 627 00:27:05,000 --> 00:27:07,800 Speaker 1: the greatest thing that's ever happened to me. He has 628 00:27:07,920 --> 00:27:11,600 Speaker 1: always and frequently told me, honey, you're beautiful. That's great, 629 00:27:11,720 --> 00:27:15,240 Speaker 1: And somehow it sounded honest without sounding like my mother, 630 00:27:15,640 --> 00:27:19,680 Speaker 1: like someone without an option to say, no, you're you're ugly. 631 00:27:19,920 --> 00:27:24,960 Speaker 5: Oh, you're beautiful, You're beautiful, You're you're beautiful, not ugly. 632 00:27:25,200 --> 00:27:29,520 Speaker 1: No, I would date you maybe. Last night Saturday, he 633 00:27:29,560 --> 00:27:32,280 Speaker 1: had a group of friends over to our home. They 634 00:27:32,359 --> 00:27:34,439 Speaker 1: meet several times a month to hang out, catch up, 635 00:27:34,480 --> 00:27:37,280 Speaker 1: and play games. He has known most of these guys 636 00:27:37,280 --> 00:27:39,639 Speaker 1: since high school. And I was upstairs in the kitchen 637 00:27:39,680 --> 00:27:42,400 Speaker 1: preparing them some drinks and snacks when I was able 638 00:27:42,440 --> 00:27:45,320 Speaker 1: to hear them in the basement, and then I began eavesdrop, 639 00:27:45,960 --> 00:27:48,840 Speaker 1: which I know is rude, but it really wasn't intentional. 640 00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:54,360 Speaker 1: I realize they were talking about me. About wha what's 641 00:27:54,400 --> 00:27:56,960 Speaker 1: going on there? A couple of the guys were teasing 642 00:27:57,000 --> 00:28:01,240 Speaker 1: my husband about me, specifically my looks. I'm sorry, but 643 00:28:01,280 --> 00:28:03,199 Speaker 1: what kind of friend is that? Yo? And also like 644 00:28:03,240 --> 00:28:07,040 Speaker 1: she's getting you guys snacks and drinks. 645 00:28:06,680 --> 00:28:10,159 Speaker 6: And you're gonna be like, yo, your wife. Your wife 646 00:28:10,240 --> 00:28:15,480 Speaker 6: is ugly. It's like, invite you to my home. We're 647 00:28:15,520 --> 00:28:17,080 Speaker 6: playing some games. You're calling life. 648 00:28:17,520 --> 00:28:20,760 Speaker 1: Literally, get the fuck out. They were specifically talking about 649 00:28:20,800 --> 00:28:22,600 Speaker 1: my looks, and I could tell it was supposed to 650 00:28:22,640 --> 00:28:25,800 Speaker 1: be funny and it was not. Oh my god. There 651 00:28:25,880 --> 00:28:28,159 Speaker 1: was a point where one of them referred to me 652 00:28:28,320 --> 00:28:33,560 Speaker 1: as a troll. What that is? This was already like 653 00:28:33,640 --> 00:28:39,400 Speaker 1: over the line, but that's yo, God, God stop, and 654 00:28:39,480 --> 00:28:44,800 Speaker 1: my husband blew up. We started shouting, listen, shut the 655 00:28:44,960 --> 00:28:51,280 Speaker 1: fuck up. I know that op is ugly, but shut up, 656 00:28:52,440 --> 00:28:56,120 Speaker 1: which is tough, but he redeems himself a little bit. 657 00:28:57,840 --> 00:29:00,640 Speaker 1: She makes me happy. Does your bim of the week 658 00:29:00,720 --> 00:29:03,280 Speaker 1: do that? Jim Dave? How long has it been since 659 00:29:03,320 --> 00:29:06,240 Speaker 1: we hung out that you haven't bitched about your wife? 660 00:29:06,680 --> 00:29:09,640 Speaker 1: He went on for a while, defending me, quote unquote, yeah, 661 00:29:09,760 --> 00:29:12,160 Speaker 1: all I could hear ringing through my head is I 662 00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:14,920 Speaker 1: know she's ugly. I know she's ugly. I know she's 663 00:29:15,040 --> 00:29:18,160 Speaker 1: ugly again and again and again in my head, and 664 00:29:18,200 --> 00:29:20,320 Speaker 1: it just broke me. I don't know why. I've always 665 00:29:20,520 --> 00:29:23,800 Speaker 1: known I'm unattractive, but he isn't supposed to know too. 666 00:29:24,960 --> 00:29:28,760 Speaker 1: He tells me I'm beautiful, so sincerely, so consistently, and 667 00:29:28,840 --> 00:29:32,680 Speaker 1: I started to believe he thought that. I started to cry, 668 00:29:32,720 --> 00:29:34,600 Speaker 1: and I ran to the shower. No one could hear 669 00:29:34,600 --> 00:29:37,320 Speaker 1: me when I came out an hour later, everyone had 670 00:29:37,400 --> 00:29:40,040 Speaker 1: gone home far earlier than normal. I went to bed 671 00:29:40,040 --> 00:29:42,160 Speaker 1: and then haven't spoken to him all day today. But 672 00:29:42,200 --> 00:29:44,000 Speaker 1: I think I've been able to avoid letting him know 673 00:29:44,040 --> 00:29:47,120 Speaker 1: I'm upset or avoiding him. I know rationally that what 674 00:29:47,160 --> 00:29:50,800 Speaker 1: he said is true and it's sweet, and that I 675 00:29:50,880 --> 00:29:53,360 Speaker 1: should be happy that he loves me and not my body, 676 00:29:53,840 --> 00:29:56,200 Speaker 1: but it doesn't seem to matter. I just want to 677 00:29:56,200 --> 00:29:59,080 Speaker 1: be pretty. God, I feel so shallow. I've been crying 678 00:29:59,080 --> 00:30:01,160 Speaker 1: all day. What do I say for him? What do 679 00:30:01,200 --> 00:30:03,040 Speaker 1: I say to him? Part of me wants to call 680 00:30:03,120 --> 00:30:05,680 Speaker 1: him a liar, to scream gall and cry well. The 681 00:30:05,680 --> 00:30:07,720 Speaker 1: other part why she just run away and never talk 682 00:30:07,760 --> 00:30:10,120 Speaker 1: to him again and acknowledge that the greatest man I 683 00:30:10,160 --> 00:30:13,640 Speaker 1: will ever meet. Can't find me attractive? Gosh, what do 684 00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:15,720 Speaker 1: you think she does? Dang? What should he do? What 685 00:30:15,760 --> 00:30:20,320 Speaker 1: should she do? Plastic Church are like Kylie Jenner, No, 686 00:30:20,360 --> 00:30:23,600 Speaker 1: I'm just kidding, but I've heard there's this like quote 687 00:30:23,600 --> 00:30:29,160 Speaker 1: where it's like, no woman is unattractive, she's just poor. Ah. 688 00:30:32,000 --> 00:30:35,680 Speaker 1: That's kind of hilarious. When you look at the transformations 689 00:30:35,720 --> 00:30:41,520 Speaker 1: of the Jennit, holy shit, it's crazy insane, especially especially Kylie. 690 00:30:42,040 --> 00:30:45,720 Speaker 5: Like her face looks so like Kim. I feel like 691 00:30:45,840 --> 00:30:48,840 Speaker 5: the basic thing was kind of there, like her basic. 692 00:30:50,000 --> 00:30:53,080 Speaker 5: But yeah, Kylie literally just a different person, Like who 693 00:30:53,120 --> 00:30:56,280 Speaker 5: are you? What should she do? I think. 694 00:30:59,080 --> 00:31:01,880 Speaker 1: You gotta Yeah, how do you feel that's it? Yeah? 695 00:31:01,920 --> 00:31:03,480 Speaker 1: That's all you can do. Yeah, that's all you can do. 696 00:31:03,600 --> 00:31:07,560 Speaker 1: And so there is an update. First off, I'd just 697 00:31:07,600 --> 00:31:09,880 Speaker 1: like to say thanks, just wow. Over the last two days, 698 00:31:09,880 --> 00:31:13,880 Speaker 1: I've had literally hundreds of messages and private messages. You 699 00:31:13,920 --> 00:31:17,080 Speaker 1: guys rock. Thank you. Seriously look at that thread. That's 700 00:31:17,080 --> 00:31:19,280 Speaker 1: got to be one of the most best positivity and 701 00:31:19,320 --> 00:31:23,560 Speaker 1: sweetness to meanness and jerks ratio of all time on Reddit. Like, Hey, 702 00:31:23,720 --> 00:31:25,440 Speaker 1: you guys knocked it out of the park. Let's go. 703 00:31:25,680 --> 00:31:28,480 Speaker 1: So yesterday, after getting a barrage to support from you guys, 704 00:31:28,560 --> 00:31:31,040 Speaker 1: I decided to try to confront my husband over what 705 00:31:31,120 --> 00:31:34,800 Speaker 1: I heard. After we were both home. I told him, Hey, 706 00:31:34,840 --> 00:31:36,760 Speaker 1: we need to talk. Yeah, you do. I told him 707 00:31:36,920 --> 00:31:40,240 Speaker 1: I'd overheard what his friends said, and he immediately started 708 00:31:40,240 --> 00:31:42,880 Speaker 1: to apologize for them saying what they were saying. And 709 00:31:42,920 --> 00:31:45,040 Speaker 1: he was saying they were jerks and assholes and that 710 00:31:45,160 --> 00:31:47,840 Speaker 1: I should have told him what i'd heard. Okay, that's 711 00:31:48,160 --> 00:31:50,840 Speaker 1: that's probably a pretty good response. I had to stop 712 00:31:50,920 --> 00:31:53,640 Speaker 1: him to let me get a word him, to tell 713 00:31:53,720 --> 00:31:55,959 Speaker 1: him it wasn't his friends so much as it was 714 00:31:56,360 --> 00:32:00,000 Speaker 1: what he said. Right when I told him what he said, 715 00:32:00,080 --> 00:32:02,680 Speaker 1: his tone changed. I could tell he wasn't expecting to 716 00:32:02,720 --> 00:32:05,800 Speaker 1: be blamed. This whole conversation planned out. I wanted to 717 00:32:05,840 --> 00:32:08,120 Speaker 1: explain how it made me feel, how I thought he 718 00:32:08,240 --> 00:32:10,880 Speaker 1: really was attracted to me, and how betrayed it made 719 00:32:10,880 --> 00:32:13,600 Speaker 1: me feel to hear him say that behind my back, 720 00:32:14,200 --> 00:32:16,160 Speaker 1: but I just started to cry and I just couldn't 721 00:32:16,160 --> 00:32:19,040 Speaker 1: communicate what I really wanted to say. He was awesome, though, 722 00:32:19,080 --> 00:32:21,320 Speaker 1: He just held me and then after a minute started 723 00:32:21,320 --> 00:32:23,440 Speaker 1: to speak like he was reading right out of the 724 00:32:23,520 --> 00:32:26,760 Speaker 1: nicest comments in the original thread, telling me he was 725 00:32:26,840 --> 00:32:29,640 Speaker 1: angry and didn't speak very well, that he really does 726 00:32:29,720 --> 00:32:32,880 Speaker 1: find me attractive, even though the world doesn't and his 727 00:32:32,880 --> 00:32:37,080 Speaker 1: friends don't. I calmed down pretty quick. I basically cried 728 00:32:37,120 --> 00:32:39,080 Speaker 1: myself out the day before. He took me to his 729 00:32:39,120 --> 00:32:41,400 Speaker 1: computer and showed me an email he sent to all 730 00:32:41,400 --> 00:32:43,960 Speaker 1: of his friends on Sunday. I wish I could copy 731 00:32:44,000 --> 00:32:46,840 Speaker 1: paste it now, but he basically called his friend's assholes, 732 00:32:47,080 --> 00:32:49,880 Speaker 1: said they crossed the line from good natured trash talk 733 00:32:50,160 --> 00:32:53,560 Speaker 1: to just being assholes, and then continued going far beyond. 734 00:32:53,760 --> 00:32:56,080 Speaker 1: He said that for an indefinite amount of time, they'd 735 00:32:56,120 --> 00:32:58,680 Speaker 1: have to find another host, and they were no longer 736 00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:03,360 Speaker 1: welcome in my home. He actually said, oh, oh P's home. Wow. 737 00:33:03,400 --> 00:33:04,880 Speaker 1: I thought that would make it sound like I was 738 00:33:05,000 --> 00:33:07,560 Speaker 1: ordering him around being a bitch, but he said he 739 00:33:07,600 --> 00:33:10,000 Speaker 1: wanted to emphasize how wrong what they were doing was. 740 00:33:10,520 --> 00:33:12,840 Speaker 1: Seeing him stand up for me again made me happy, 741 00:33:13,160 --> 00:33:15,600 Speaker 1: especially seeing him do it without talking bad about me, 742 00:33:16,080 --> 00:33:18,480 Speaker 1: helping me believe it really was just the heat of 743 00:33:18,480 --> 00:33:20,240 Speaker 1: the moment in a bad word choice. 744 00:33:21,360 --> 00:33:23,440 Speaker 5: And this was before he sent it before or he 745 00:33:23,480 --> 00:33:25,640 Speaker 5: even knew right before he knew that she knew. 746 00:33:25,760 --> 00:33:28,080 Speaker 1: Yeah. Wow. He told me to wait in the room 747 00:33:28,120 --> 00:33:30,280 Speaker 1: and left, coming back with a folder. He said he 748 00:33:30,320 --> 00:33:32,480 Speaker 1: was going to give me this for Christmas, but that 749 00:33:32,560 --> 00:33:34,800 Speaker 1: he'd get me something else. I try to say no, 750 00:33:34,960 --> 00:33:38,640 Speaker 1: but he insisted. It was plane tickets and brochures. He 751 00:33:38,760 --> 00:33:41,200 Speaker 1: set up a trip early January to a SPA hotel 752 00:33:41,200 --> 00:33:44,320 Speaker 1: resort thing in British Columbia, and it was mind blowing. 753 00:33:44,840 --> 00:33:47,400 Speaker 1: I realized he probably spent like several thousand dollars on it, 754 00:33:47,480 --> 00:33:49,840 Speaker 1: and we budget pretty thoroughly and he shouldn't have been 755 00:33:49,840 --> 00:33:51,760 Speaker 1: able to spend that without me noticing. And I asked 756 00:33:51,800 --> 00:33:53,560 Speaker 1: where he got the money, and he said he'd been 757 00:33:53,560 --> 00:33:56,080 Speaker 1: planning this for more than a year and saving all 758 00:33:56,120 --> 00:33:58,640 Speaker 1: the money assigned to his weekly spending money and collecting 759 00:33:58,680 --> 00:34:00,920 Speaker 1: where I wouldn't notice change regards, et cetera. 760 00:34:01,160 --> 00:34:02,880 Speaker 5: What if he said like, oh, that came from my 761 00:34:02,920 --> 00:34:07,840 Speaker 5: second family's it's my mistress's money. The alternative story when 762 00:34:07,880 --> 00:34:08,360 Speaker 5: I say. 763 00:34:08,160 --> 00:34:10,640 Speaker 1: That, sometimes I'm not sure I deserve him. Understand that 764 00:34:10,640 --> 00:34:12,759 Speaker 1: I'm not having a crisis I need help dealing with. 765 00:34:13,040 --> 00:34:16,120 Speaker 1: He's just amazingly awesome. He's taking me out for dinner, 766 00:34:16,239 --> 00:34:18,760 Speaker 1: so I have to go, but I'll be on again tonight. 767 00:34:19,120 --> 00:34:23,080 Speaker 5: Hey, A wholesome, whole, wholesome, red and ending. I was 768 00:34:23,160 --> 00:34:26,520 Speaker 5: I was waiting for the floor to drop out, but 769 00:34:26,840 --> 00:34:27,600 Speaker 5: it really went wow. 770 00:34:27,640 --> 00:34:28,000 Speaker 1: Wow. 771 00:34:28,160 --> 00:34:31,680 Speaker 5: That's I'm honestly curious if if any of anyone watching 772 00:34:31,760 --> 00:34:35,680 Speaker 5: or listening has had experienced something similar. Yeah, I would 773 00:34:35,719 --> 00:34:38,360 Speaker 5: be curious to hear from you, because that is but 774 00:34:38,520 --> 00:34:42,920 Speaker 5: amazing on the husband to like I stick up for her. Yeah, yeah, 775 00:34:42,960 --> 00:34:45,040 Speaker 5: like he he did it. Like the fact that he 776 00:34:45,080 --> 00:34:48,120 Speaker 5: did it before she said anything, like when after them 777 00:34:48,120 --> 00:34:50,239 Speaker 5: that hard is like okay, that's you know, he really 778 00:34:50,280 --> 00:34:51,880 Speaker 5: he really means it. I feel like because if she 779 00:34:51,920 --> 00:34:53,439 Speaker 5: had just told him to do it, then it's like, okay, 780 00:34:53,440 --> 00:34:55,160 Speaker 5: it does he kind of. 781 00:34:55,200 --> 00:34:57,200 Speaker 1: It shows that it's actually coming from a really good place. Yes, 782 00:34:58,440 --> 00:35:01,160 Speaker 1: thank you all so much for tuning. If you love us, 783 00:35:01,480 --> 00:35:05,839 Speaker 1: make sure to like this video right now right love you, 784 00:35:06,360 --> 00:35:07,000 Speaker 1: I love you.