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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam. This is John the og Storytime

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Speaker 1: podcast host. Oh yeah, we got some great stories coming up.

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Speaker 2: But before that, we get a teeny two minute break

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Speaker 2: from the sponsors that keep this show propped up like

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Speaker 2: a little house.

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Speaker 3: Oh yeah, my fiance and her family are embarrassed by

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Speaker 3: my disabled brother.

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Speaker 4: They exclude him from everything. They're embarrassing. That's actually really

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Speaker 4: embarrassing to be them. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: I twenty nine male, have been with my fiance, thirty

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Speaker 3: three female, for three years. We met while I was

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Speaker 3: working in the US. We've been engaged for a few months.

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Speaker 3: Wedding plans are for fall of next year. Our parents

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Speaker 3: share the same cultural background. I have a brother, thirty

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Speaker 3: one male, with Down syndrum. She has no siblings. By

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Speaker 3: the way, it comes from Camague on the r slash. Okay,

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Speaker 3: Storytime separated, so I didn't talk too much about my

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Speaker 3: family for the first year of our relationship. This was

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Speaker 3: for no specific reason, they just weren't there. She knew

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Speaker 3: my background though, and that my brother had Down syndrome.

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Speaker 3: My fiance comes from a lot of money, whereas my

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Speaker 3: family and I are middle class. My parents run a

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Speaker 3: restaurant in my country, and my brother is employed by that.

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Speaker 3: When I was younger, I used to do all the

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Speaker 3: deliveries with my brother, and he took over that job

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Speaker 3: completely when I left for university. I love my brother,

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Speaker 3: and when I talk about him, I don't focus on

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Speaker 3: his disability.

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Speaker 4: To me, he's just my brother.

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Speaker 3: When I talk about him or recount a story from

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Speaker 3: my past, I just tell it. It's not necessary to

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Speaker 3: mention that he's disabled every single time. One of the

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Speaker 3: things my fiance has used against me in an argument

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Speaker 3: is that I downplayed his disability because I talked about

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Speaker 3: him so casually.

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Speaker 4: He's supposed to do be like, that's my brother. I

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Speaker 4: went to the store today. Yeah, oh my god, I

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Speaker 4: was talking to my brother with towns right about the

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Speaker 4: football game.

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Speaker 5: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: That's just so unnecessar.

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Speaker 3: Why would you do that? Yeah, that would be weird.

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Speaker 3: That's really interesting. She first met my family during year

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Speaker 3: two of our relationship. She met my brother and he

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Speaker 3: was nothing but gentlemanly towards her. He gave her a gift,

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Speaker 3: bowed to her, and refused to drop formal speech. That's

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Speaker 3: so nice of him. His quirk was that he was

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Speaker 3: overly respectful and made himself available in case she needed

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Speaker 3: any This was just his way of being hospitable, and

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Speaker 3: I couldn't talk him into relaxing. My fiance didn't complain

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Speaker 3: about anything to me or express she was uncomfortable. During

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Speaker 3: her three week visit, there was probably a handful of

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Speaker 3: small occasions where my brother accompanied us. These were things

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Speaker 3: like sharing a few meals and wondering around afterwards, because

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Speaker 3: he wanted to be our guide. When I was younger,

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Speaker 3: I could tell my brother something like find me a

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Speaker 3: quiet place where no one will bother me, and he

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Speaker 3: would be able to take me to the perfect spot.

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Speaker 4: You could get as specific as you want. This is

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Speaker 4: one of his talents.

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Speaker 3: And I challenged my fiance to describe somewhere she wanted

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Speaker 3: to go so he could take us there. That's a fun,

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Speaker 3: little I like adventure. I really love that, especially if

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Speaker 3: he's like excited about showing them places like that's perfect.

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Speaker 3: I remember her asking me if he could leave after

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Speaker 3: he took us to a place.

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Speaker 4: I thought she just wanted to be alone with me.

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Speaker 3: Now I feel like it was because she was embarrassed

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Speaker 3: to have my brother there with us. Between that first

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Speaker 3: visit and our engagement, there aren't any other interactions that

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Speaker 3: I can think of.

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Speaker 4: It makes me.

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Speaker 3: Feel like her reaction has come on suddenly. I don't

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Speaker 3: understand it. I'm confused. But after we got engaged, I

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Speaker 3: sugges did we elope because I'm just that kind of person.

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Speaker 3: I don't care about weddings. I've been teasing her from

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Speaker 3: day one to just run away with me. She said

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Speaker 3: she would like a proper wedding because she is an

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Speaker 3: only child and her parents would like to see her

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Speaker 3: get married. I told her, if it's important to her,

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Speaker 3: it's important to me. Our families met recently, her parents

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Speaker 3: met my brother for the first time. While we were

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Speaker 3: taking photos, my fiance's mom insisted on taking a lot

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Speaker 3: of photos of just me with my fiance's family and

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Speaker 3: a few with my parents, excluding my brother.

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Speaker 4: From a lot of the group photos. So weird. That

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Speaker 4: is weird, but so weird, that's really weird.

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Speaker 3: It wasn't apparent at first that this was happening until

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Speaker 3: my dad approached me on the sidelines and whispered, does

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Speaker 3: it feel like they don't want my brother in the photos.

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Speaker 3: I didn't want to acknowledge something like this was happening,

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Speaker 3: so I told my dad that can't be true.

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Speaker 4: That can't be true. No, absolutely.

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Speaker 3: I made a stupid joke about how it's probably because

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Speaker 3: they want photos with their future son in law more

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Speaker 3: and kept my focus on making sure everything went well

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Speaker 3: that night.

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Speaker 4: I thought it did.

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Speaker 3: My fiance and I went back to her place after

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Speaker 3: this and nothing was wrong. In the middle of undressing,

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Speaker 3: and I said something like, I can't wait for all

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Speaker 3: this wedding stuff to be over, so I can have

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Speaker 3: you to myself. She said something back like me too,

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Speaker 3: So I can have you to myself and you won't

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Speaker 3: have to deal with your brother.

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Speaker 4: Oh no, how dare you? Wow? You won't have to

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Speaker 4: deal with your brother? Also, just like it feels like

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Speaker 4: she thinks that he's gonna be on the same page. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: and I'm just wondering, when is Opie ever given right?

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Speaker 4: Why would you?

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Speaker 3: That's an insane thing to say. Wow, this spoiled the

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Speaker 3: mood for me. I thought it was a strange thing

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Speaker 3: to say, so I kind of reacted coldly.

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Speaker 4: I asked her, what does that mean.

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Speaker 3: She started cressing my face and hair and stuff, telling

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Speaker 3: me she knows it must be hard. I probably feel

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Speaker 3: very burdened about having a disabled sibling, but when I

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Speaker 3: settle in the US with her. I can finally have

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Speaker 3: a life of my own.

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Speaker 4: Shah. No one's going to us with you. Yeah, it's

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Speaker 4: not gonna happen. You're going to the US by yourself

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Speaker 4: to live alone. Yeah that's you suck and you're ablest. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Oh my goodness, I'm rude. This started an argument. I

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Speaker 3: got a bit heated and mentioned him being.

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Speaker 4: Excluded from the photos. She didn't acknowledge it, but she

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Speaker 4: didn't deny it either. Hmmm.

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Speaker 3: She defended her mom and said she's probably just uncomfortable

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Speaker 3: being around someone like that.

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Speaker 4: Oh, keep making it worse. It's just so much worse.

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Speaker 4: Stop dogging.

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Speaker 3: Oh my goodness. I challenged her statement. She got upset

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Speaker 3: and asked me to drop it and come to bed.

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Speaker 3: I told her I'm leaving, and I went to stay

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Speaker 3: with my parents. By the way, you can only stay

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Speaker 3: with us live on YouTube every week day three pmpst.

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Speaker 4: You just got dap your profile, dada profile.

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Speaker 3: I didn't have the heart to explain why I showed up,

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Speaker 3: so I just put on a face and said I

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Speaker 3: wanted to spend time with them. My fiance and I

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Speaker 3: have been distant for days. She reached out a few times,

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Speaker 3: but I need time. It's just there's something tugging at

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Speaker 3: the back of my brain and telling me that she

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Speaker 3: and her family are embarrassed by my family. There's no

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Speaker 3: clear sign, but the feeling is there. After this recent

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Speaker 3: interaction between our families and our argument. My friends think

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Speaker 3: it's just cold feet because things are getting real, but

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Speaker 3: I don't think it's that.

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Speaker 4: And that is the end. Oh no, not a sad end.

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Speaker 4: Oh my gosh. Yeah, that's crazy. No, I don't think. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: I think that's fair. I think it's a fair reason

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Speaker 4: to not want to go through the wedding. Yeah, your

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Speaker 4: partner is thinking badly about your family member. Yeah, hopefully

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Speaker 4: everything works out with it and you get to hang

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Speaker 4: out with your brother.

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Speaker 3: You'll find someone that loves hanging out with your brother. Yes,

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Speaker 3: and it's not embarrassed by him at all.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it doesn't suck as a person.

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Speaker 3: Yea.

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Speaker 4: But that's the end of that story and we'll see

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Speaker 4: you for the next one. Woo. My boyfriend deleted my

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Speaker 4: novel because he said I wasn't paying enough attention to him.

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Speaker 4: Oh my gosh, I'm deleting our relationship. I have been

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Speaker 4: working on a novel for about a year. I write

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Speaker 4: every day, even just a sentence. Six months ago, my

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Speaker 4: college switched to smart boars and put all their whiteboards

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Speaker 4: in the garbage. I grab two because I have a

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Speaker 4: huge wall space open in my living room. By the way,

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Speaker 4: this comes from ten point font on the Okay, storytime separated.

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Speaker 4: So most of my writing is done my Google Drive.

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Speaker 4: But I have things like character personalities, names, places, a

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Speaker 4: general timeline, et cetera. You know, stuff I want to remember.

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Speaker 4: I used to take photos of it so I had

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Speaker 4: my ideas with me. I used to write on my

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Speaker 4: lunch break. I stopped doing that because I burn myself

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Speaker 4: out and my writing quality takes a huge dive. Plus,

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Speaker 4: my boyfriend helps me write and it helps us connect

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Speaker 4: in such a deep way, so I haven't taken a

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Speaker 4: photo in about three months. The whiteboards are nice because

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Speaker 4: I can read my notes across the room while I'm

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Speaker 4: sitting in my favorite chair. I got home last night

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Speaker 4: and all of my stuff was erased. It was all

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Speaker 4: just train of thought, like I'd come home and jot

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Speaker 4: something down. Handwriting is way more cathartic for me. I

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Speaker 4: had sketches of things in the novel. I'd basically have

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Speaker 4: to go through and remember every single thing. I have

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Speaker 4: a lot of it stored in my head or on

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Speaker 4: my Google drive. But there are some things I'll never

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Speaker 4: get back. But it's the fact he erased it. We

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Speaker 4: don't live together. What so he broke in and erased it?

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Speaker 4: I guess so what he told me. I've been focusing

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Speaker 4: too much on it and have no time for him.

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Speaker 4: We hang out of my house five to six nights

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Speaker 4: a week. What you got five to six times a week?

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Speaker 4: And he's complain of not having enough time. I feel

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Speaker 4: like I'm going insane. I right while he plays video games.

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Speaker 4: It's a good dynamic and I thought we enjoyed it.

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Speaker 4: Apparently we were always laughing and he helps me with

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Speaker 4: my wording and I google stuff to help him in

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Speaker 4: his game. This is the first time he's mentioned it

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Speaker 4: bothering him. If he had brought it up, we could

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Speaker 4: have talked about it. But he went nuclear, and I

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Speaker 4: have no idea why. I don't know what to do.

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Speaker 4: I'm so frustrated. We have had one serious argument over

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Speaker 4: his driving. He got better. My family took him on

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Speaker 4: vacation a few weeks ago. We watch his nephew all

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Speaker 4: the time. His family paid for my entire spring semester.

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Speaker 4: We are so much a part of each other's lives,

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Speaker 4: and I feel so hurt and heartbroken. He's my muse

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Speaker 4: and just the other day we went to the jewelry

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Speaker 4: store to look at Rasooh. My feelings rotate between rage, sadness, confusion, sorrow, anger, everything. Wow,

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Speaker 4: how do I even approach this? Last night I was

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Speaker 4: so up, said I asked him to leave. He hasn't texted,

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Speaker 4: he hasn't called, he hasn't stopped by. I keep typing

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Speaker 4: in questions to ask, but I keep erasing them. Why

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Speaker 4: did you do it? Are you unhappy with our relationship?

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Speaker 4: What did I do? Nothing? I'm even more heartbroken due

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Speaker 4: to the fact he hasn't called or texted all day.

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Speaker 4: I'm afraid to call him. I don't want to hear

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Speaker 4: him say he thinks we should break up, or he

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Speaker 4: doesn't want to be with me when I'm writing, or

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Speaker 4: just ignore my call. And there is an update three

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Speaker 4: months later.

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Speaker 5: Oh my gosh, I think I think that there's a

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Speaker 5: fire in my brain right now because my heart so

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Speaker 5: insane and like he's playing he plays video games while

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Speaker 5: she writes that sounds like a great dynamic.

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Speaker 4: Sounds like, honestly, if this this is my ideal dynamic.

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Speaker 3: If he's doing his thing too, he's not like trying

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Speaker 3: to talk to her or something like that, Like it's Yeah,

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Speaker 3: I could see it being some sort of dramatic thing

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Speaker 3: where she's like, you know, writing or whatever, and then

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Speaker 3: he's like trying to talk about her day. And then

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Speaker 3: she didn't realize that he didn't erase it because he

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Speaker 3: did it while he was talking or something like that,

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Speaker 3: and she didn't pay attention to him.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, but that's definitely not what's happening here. It seems

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Speaker 4: like he I don't know, he's just throwing a fit,

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Speaker 4: not communicating. Yeah. And also she said that they kind

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Speaker 4: of share the writing process together because like it' she said,

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Speaker 4: like she talks to him about it. Yeah, she like

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Speaker 4: brings up She's like, oh, like let's research something, little details.

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Speaker 3: He knew it was important to her, and he knew

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Speaker 3: that that would hurt, and that's why he.

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Speaker 4: Did it and even confessed that that was the reason

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Speaker 4: crazy get out of there. He should be open that

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Speaker 4: you don't bring up with him. Yeah, there you go,

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Speaker 4: did you hold the power here? Three months later, it's

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Speaker 4: been about three months since I made my post. This

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Speaker 4: somehow seems like it got really long. The night I

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Speaker 4: made my post, I went to a friend's house and

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Speaker 4: she ordered a pizza. We got ice cream and a

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Speaker 4: bottle of wine. She's a straight shooter, takes a neutral approach,

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Speaker 4: and she gave solid relationship advice, so I felt comfortable

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Speaker 4: talking to her about everything. She couldn't figure out why

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Speaker 4: he'd done it. We went over how he and I

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Speaker 4: hung out, how much he seemed to care about me,

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Speaker 4: how he looked into each other's eyes. But it also

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Speaker 4: revealed a lot of hesitation on my part. I'm a

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Speaker 4: pause a person and tend to forgive faults or overlook them.

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Speaker 4: I suspected some sort of coping method from my childhood.

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Speaker 4: We had some unresolved issues. I think he was holding in,

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Speaker 4: but when I'd bring them up, he just kind of

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Speaker 4: got salty and he would go, it's fine, I don't

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Speaker 4: care anymore. But he'd bring them up in arguments. I

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Speaker 4: didn't realize how toxic it was. Oh that same night,

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Speaker 4: I told him I was coming over the next day

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Speaker 4: to talk about things. I told him i'd be over

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Speaker 4: around eleven, and the only thing he texted me was okay,

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Speaker 4: which I didn't respond to. I went over to his

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Speaker 4: house at eleven and he was still asleep. He got

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Speaker 4: upset when I woke him up. It took the wind

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Speaker 4: out of my sails. On a good day, I cry

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Speaker 4: if something upsets me. But I was so angry and

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Speaker 4: heartbroken I couldn't even think. I left without saying a

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Speaker 4: word to him. He didn't follow me. On my way out,

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Speaker 4: I went to the kitchen and took my house key

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Speaker 4: from his key ring. I drove home in a daze,

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Speaker 4: collected all of his things, put them in a box

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Speaker 4: on my porch, and texted him to come get them.

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Speaker 4: He said, what the hell, that's fine, I'll come by

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Speaker 4: later and pick them up. I went out with a

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Speaker 4: few girlfriends. We got day wasted and had some of

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Speaker 4: these food It made me feel better. But when I

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Speaker 4: got home and his things were gone, I was heartbroken. Wow,

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Speaker 4: just the fact that he never texted her, never like

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Speaker 4: said don didn't even try to talk to her about it.

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Speaker 4: Just was like, that's it, We're over. So crazy. I

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Speaker 4: never texted him, he never texted me. I got absolutely

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Speaker 4: no closure, And even though people say closure is bs,

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Speaker 4: I've had the hardest time moving on. It's been three months,

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Speaker 4: and I still cry in the shower sometimes. Even though

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Speaker 4: I broke up with him, I still feel so confused

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Speaker 4: and heartbroken. I never figured out why he did what

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Speaker 4: he did. I likely never will, and I miss his

295
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Speaker 4: help and companionship. I love to come here and say

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Speaker 4: I finished my book, but I haven't written much since

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Speaker 4: I can't get into my characters' heads anymore. There's a

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Speaker 4: feeling of loneliness and grief, and that sort of helped

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Speaker 4: me create a better outline, but I can't write about

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Speaker 4: my characters. The other day I went to the bookstore

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Speaker 4: to study. I ended up looking at books related to

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Speaker 4: time travel and found one that has thousands of positive reviews.

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Speaker 4: My novel is science fiction, and I've been trying to

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Speaker 4: think of how to incorporate time travel, so it's kind

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Speaker 4: of lined up perfectly. It turns out a lot of

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Speaker 4: my ideas mirror theoretical physics. It's eerie. I've never taken

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Speaker 4: physics or read about it. To suddenly string theory makes sense,

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00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:13,040
Speaker 4: cosmology makes sense. Whoa oh, he's like, it's all I'm

309
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Speaker 4: blown away and it makes me feel so weird that

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Speaker 4: so much of my plot has been studied, so the

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Speaker 4: book has lit a fire under me. Reading more about

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Speaker 4: everything makes me so excited, and it's helped me really

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Speaker 4: flesh out my plot. I can't put it down and

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Speaker 4: read twenty or so pages a night. I haven't actually

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Speaker 4: made time to sit and read a book for years.

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Speaker 4: I always have a notebook with me now, so I

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Speaker 4: write my ideas down. I haven't written about my characters yet,

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Speaker 4: but my passion is back. My plot is making more sense.

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Speaker 4: And by the way, it would make sense for you

320
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Speaker 4: guys to join us live every weekday at three PMPSD

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Speaker 4: on YouTube, on Facebook, on TikTok. Just tap her profile,

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Speaker 4: just top it. That's it. I'm so excited for her. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: this book now sucks that you had to break up,

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Speaker 4: but you got a book.

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Speaker 3: The best way to get out of a breakover, to

326
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Speaker 3: move on, though, I feel, is just to do exactly that,

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Speaker 3: like just stuff, get busy with your hobbies, your job, whatever,

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Speaker 3: you know.

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Speaker 4: And it sounds like she's doing that, and I'm very

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00:14:03,240 --> 00:14:05,920
Speaker 4: excited now. I don't care much about how we broke up.

331
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Speaker 4: I'm not confused. I sometimes get sad at night or

332
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Speaker 4: during the day, or if I go out and make

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00:14:10,880 --> 00:14:13,920
Speaker 4: long dye contact with a guy. I haven't thought about dating,

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00:14:13,960 --> 00:14:16,240
Speaker 4: and I'm still too hurt to pursue it. But every

335
00:14:16,320 --> 00:14:18,760
Speaker 4: day I move on a little bit more. Kay, that's

336
00:14:18,760 --> 00:14:20,920
Speaker 4: how it goes. I wanted to thank everyone who gave

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00:14:20,920 --> 00:14:23,320
Speaker 4: me advice. I forgot about my post until just now,

338
00:14:23,360 --> 00:14:25,680
Speaker 4: and when I went back through to read it, it

339
00:14:25,760 --> 00:14:28,480
Speaker 4: made me realize how seriously messed up it was, and

340
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Speaker 4: it gave me closure. Thank you. Wow that story. Wow, Ope,

341
00:14:33,120 --> 00:14:36,120
Speaker 4: you're gonna You're gonna get through it. It's good. Take time. Yeah,

342
00:14:36,280 --> 00:14:38,320
Speaker 4: but you know, let your heart heal. You got it.

343
00:14:38,360 --> 00:14:40,200
Speaker 4: But that's the end of that story. So let's get

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Speaker 4: into the next one.

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Speaker 3: I snooped on my boyfriend's phone and I saw him

346
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Speaker 3: and his ex.

347
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Speaker 4: So it was an old picture.

348
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Speaker 3: Please let's find out I thirty two females have been

349
00:14:51,240 --> 00:14:54,400
Speaker 3: dating my boyfriend forty email for technically two years. When

350
00:14:54,440 --> 00:14:56,560
Speaker 3: we first got together, we were both going through a lot,

351
00:14:56,600 --> 00:14:58,640
Speaker 3: and after a few months, he asked if we could

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00:14:58,640 --> 00:15:00,680
Speaker 3: take a step back from the relationship s part and

353
00:15:00,760 --> 00:15:03,680
Speaker 3: just focus on ourselves and remain friends and close. By

354
00:15:03,720 --> 00:15:05,800
Speaker 3: the way, this comes from a snake in the grass

355
00:15:05,880 --> 00:15:08,760
Speaker 3: on the r slash Okay, story time sepread. He says

356
00:15:08,840 --> 00:15:11,000
Speaker 3: it was a break but definitely felt like a breakup.

357
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Speaker 4: Yeah, remain friends. That sounds like a break Yeah, that

358
00:15:13,480 --> 00:15:16,720
Speaker 4: really does for some contacts. Shortly before we got together,

359
00:15:16,840 --> 00:15:18,600
Speaker 4: we were both going through a divorce.

360
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Speaker 3: My husband of twelve years decided he didn't want to

361
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Speaker 3: be married anymore, and he moved to Japan.

362
00:15:24,080 --> 00:15:27,840
Speaker 4: Wait, he was eighteen because thirty two. Well she's thirty

363
00:15:27,840 --> 00:15:30,400
Speaker 4: two now she's been with her boyfriend. Oh she was

364
00:15:30,440 --> 00:15:33,880
Speaker 4: twenty twenty, She still twenty when they She's been with

365
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Speaker 4: her now partner for two years, so she was thirty

366
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Speaker 4: so she yeah, eighteen, shoot dead?

367
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Speaker 3: Oh Man, and his wife was emotionally abusive and drinking

368
00:15:44,320 --> 00:15:47,280
Speaker 3: heavily from her depression. During our break, he spent a

369
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Speaker 3: lot of time with his soon to be ex wife

370
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Speaker 3: alone in his home. To this day, he remains that

371
00:15:52,960 --> 00:15:55,600
Speaker 3: nothing happened, but when we made things official again, she

372
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Speaker 3: told him that she felt led on and blah blah blah.

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Speaker 4: She spent a bunch of time with his Yeah, but

374
00:16:00,840 --> 00:16:02,880
Speaker 4: maybe weren't like fully divorced.

375
00:16:03,040 --> 00:16:07,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, crazy, And he confessed that she spent the night

376
00:16:07,120 --> 00:16:09,440
Speaker 3: here at some point during that time. But it's firm

377
00:16:09,560 --> 00:16:11,880
Speaker 3: that she only slept on the couch because it was late.

378
00:16:11,760 --> 00:16:14,920
Speaker 4: Before everyone jumps. I wasn't innocent during this time.

379
00:16:15,280 --> 00:16:17,480
Speaker 3: After a few months up the break, I assumed he

380
00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:19,760
Speaker 3: was going to work things out with his ex, as

381
00:16:19,760 --> 00:16:21,720
Speaker 3: she probably did too clearly.

382
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Speaker 4: So I started talking to a guy. I thought he

383
00:16:24,120 --> 00:16:24,600
Speaker 4: was nice.

384
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Speaker 3: That's a whole emotionally traumatic story in and of itself,

385
00:16:27,680 --> 00:16:29,720
Speaker 3: and we talked a lot and spent a good amount

386
00:16:29,720 --> 00:16:32,120
Speaker 3: of time together. We have a physical relationship, and I

387
00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:34,720
Speaker 3: know that makes me sort of an a hole. But again,

388
00:16:34,920 --> 00:16:37,920
Speaker 3: another story time. Please send that one in, then send

389
00:16:37,960 --> 00:16:41,400
Speaker 3: it in. So my now boyfriend finds out about this

390
00:16:41,440 --> 00:16:44,040
Speaker 3: guy I'm talking to and flips he thought we were

391
00:16:44,040 --> 00:16:46,040
Speaker 3: on a break and that we were always going to

392
00:16:46,080 --> 00:16:47,480
Speaker 3: come back to each other. Then you have to be

393
00:16:47,560 --> 00:16:50,520
Speaker 3: clear about that, you be like, in three months time,

394
00:16:50,880 --> 00:16:54,200
Speaker 3: let's rehash this, right, just see anyone else?

395
00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:54,680
Speaker 4: Yeah?

396
00:16:54,760 --> 00:16:57,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's just that seems hard. Thus starts a few

397
00:16:58,000 --> 00:17:01,160
Speaker 3: month long entanglement where I was absolutely the a hole

398
00:17:01,240 --> 00:17:04,159
Speaker 3: and have taken full responsibility for my actions, and my

399
00:17:04,240 --> 00:17:06,760
Speaker 3: boyfriend has forgiven me as I him for that time,

400
00:17:06,840 --> 00:17:09,359
Speaker 3: and we came back together and have been officially dating

401
00:17:09,359 --> 00:17:10,840
Speaker 3: and exclusive for almost a year.

402
00:17:10,880 --> 00:17:13,560
Speaker 4: Okay, so they said like technically two years. Yeah, so

403
00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:13,920
Speaker 4: a year.

404
00:17:14,119 --> 00:17:16,679
Speaker 3: So yeah, now here we are sharing a home together,

405
00:17:16,840 --> 00:17:19,200
Speaker 3: happy as can be. I'm going to say, I know

406
00:17:19,320 --> 00:17:21,160
Speaker 3: snooping is bad, invasion of privacy.

407
00:17:21,320 --> 00:17:22,760
Speaker 4: I am in the wrong for that part.

408
00:17:22,800 --> 00:17:25,760
Speaker 3: And I do understand that I have snooped previously and

409
00:17:25,800 --> 00:17:28,159
Speaker 3: found a picture on his phone from his and his

410
00:17:28,280 --> 00:17:32,520
Speaker 3: ex wife's sleepover where she was finishing changing into one

411
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Speaker 3: of his shirts, no pants on.

412
00:17:34,600 --> 00:17:37,200
Speaker 4: And kneeling on the bed we now share and have

413
00:17:37,359 --> 00:17:38,160
Speaker 4: been sharing.

414
00:17:38,359 --> 00:17:42,879
Speaker 6: Okay, Okay, this is not just any picture, Okay, Okay,

415
00:17:43,040 --> 00:17:47,040
Speaker 6: So it seems like during the break, Yes, this is

416
00:17:47,080 --> 00:17:49,160
Speaker 6: what was happen because like during like what I'm assuming

417
00:17:49,200 --> 00:17:51,840
Speaker 6: it sounds like this was during the break Yeah.

418
00:17:51,680 --> 00:17:56,440
Speaker 4: But so not necessarily like cheating, however, very hypocritical because

419
00:17:56,480 --> 00:17:58,840
Speaker 4: he was getting on heard about this when he was doing.

420
00:17:58,720 --> 00:18:01,159
Speaker 3: The same thing, right, Like, it doesn't it's not necessarily

421
00:18:01,160 --> 00:18:02,600
Speaker 3: bad that they got together, but it's bad that he

422
00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:04,720
Speaker 3: lied about it this whole time.

423
00:18:05,800 --> 00:18:07,320
Speaker 4: I was devastated.

424
00:18:07,400 --> 00:18:09,679
Speaker 3: I knew she had slept over, but that how do

425
00:18:09,760 --> 00:18:12,439
Speaker 3: I not assume that they slept together? How do I

426
00:18:12,520 --> 00:18:15,320
Speaker 3: not try and fit those pieces together of did she

427
00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:16,880
Speaker 3: sleep in the bed with him?

428
00:18:16,920 --> 00:18:19,640
Speaker 4: Did they have spicy sleep? No, wonder if she fell

429
00:18:19,720 --> 00:18:20,040
Speaker 4: let on.

430
00:18:20,359 --> 00:18:22,919
Speaker 3: I eventually got so low with my own thoughts I

431
00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:24,560
Speaker 3: thought about hurting myself.

432
00:18:24,960 --> 00:18:26,800
Speaker 4: No, oh, my gosh.

433
00:18:27,000 --> 00:18:29,320
Speaker 3: As I was processing all of this, I had a thought,

434
00:18:29,440 --> 00:18:32,040
Speaker 3: is in the past, there's no changing what might or

435
00:18:32,200 --> 00:18:34,960
Speaker 3: might not have happened between them, or that I did

436
00:18:35,040 --> 00:18:37,600
Speaker 3: have a physical relationship with someone else, and he does

437
00:18:37,720 --> 00:18:40,320
Speaker 3: know about that part. So can I not forgive him

438
00:18:40,440 --> 00:18:42,800
Speaker 3: and move past this as well? I told him what

439
00:18:42,840 --> 00:18:44,840
Speaker 3: I had found at the time and exactly how it

440
00:18:44,880 --> 00:18:48,080
Speaker 3: made me feel. He immediately apologized, told me what happened,

441
00:18:48,119 --> 00:18:49,919
Speaker 3: and swore they did not sleep together.

442
00:18:50,080 --> 00:18:52,399
Speaker 4: I don't know, man, I don't know. I don't know.

443
00:18:52,720 --> 00:18:53,119
Speaker 6: I don't know.

444
00:18:53,480 --> 00:18:55,520
Speaker 4: She's wearing no pants. You took a picture of her

445
00:18:55,640 --> 00:18:56,879
Speaker 4: wearing no pants.

446
00:18:56,520 --> 00:18:59,000
Speaker 3: And she's putting on your shirt, put on your shirt,

447
00:18:59,240 --> 00:19:01,160
Speaker 3: changing in front of you. If you gun a separated

448
00:19:01,480 --> 00:19:03,400
Speaker 3: and you're like thinking of being with this other girl,

449
00:19:03,440 --> 00:19:04,320
Speaker 3: I don't think you'd.

450
00:19:04,160 --> 00:19:06,399
Speaker 4: Be like naked with your X.

451
00:19:06,560 --> 00:19:06,639
Speaker 3: Like.

452
00:19:06,680 --> 00:19:08,560
Speaker 4: I don't know, man, I don't know about this. Just

453
00:19:08,560 --> 00:19:09,880
Speaker 4: be me, but may just.

454
00:19:09,880 --> 00:19:14,040
Speaker 3: Be up call me traditional, But yeah, that's crazy. I

455
00:19:14,080 --> 00:19:16,119
Speaker 3: may never know the truth from that time, but it

456
00:19:16,240 --> 00:19:18,800
Speaker 3: is history and there is no going back. I've been

457
00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:21,040
Speaker 3: depressed again lately. A lot of stuff has happened to

458
00:19:21,119 --> 00:19:23,119
Speaker 3: me during this time of year, and things continue to

459
00:19:23,119 --> 00:19:25,240
Speaker 3: come up and remind me of those traumas. And I

460
00:19:25,359 --> 00:19:28,520
Speaker 3: had this moment. We can call it weakness, fear, and security,

461
00:19:28,720 --> 00:19:32,119
Speaker 3: self sabotage. All of the things are properly applicable. But

462
00:19:32,200 --> 00:19:34,760
Speaker 3: I went through his phone again last night. I went

463
00:19:34,800 --> 00:19:37,640
Speaker 3: to his saved passwords in the web browser. I found

464
00:19:37,640 --> 00:19:42,160
Speaker 3: a password for Spicy chat rooms, an only fans and Tinder.

465
00:19:42,280 --> 00:19:45,040
Speaker 3: I tried Tinder and the account was disabled. And I

466
00:19:45,160 --> 00:19:48,520
Speaker 3: truly don't think he's cheating. So I determine these must

467
00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:50,200
Speaker 3: have been from the time we were struggling to see

468
00:19:50,200 --> 00:19:51,320
Speaker 3: if we wanted to work things out.

469
00:19:51,400 --> 00:19:53,439
Speaker 4: Okay, I think that is possible. I think so too.

470
00:19:53,680 --> 00:19:54,320
Speaker 4: I think so too.

471
00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:56,480
Speaker 3: I can't fault my guy for being on dating sites

472
00:19:56,560 --> 00:19:58,800
Speaker 3: during that time. It was a very dark, depressing and

473
00:19:58,840 --> 00:20:00,680
Speaker 3: painful time for both of us. I know the part

474
00:20:00,720 --> 00:20:02,639
Speaker 3: I played in it. I heard him so deeply. The

475
00:20:02,680 --> 00:20:05,160
Speaker 3: reason I want to comfort him. I know you're asking

476
00:20:05,200 --> 00:20:07,760
Speaker 3: yourself now because he told me he was only on

477
00:20:07,880 --> 00:20:10,600
Speaker 3: Hinge during that time and told me about the girl

478
00:20:10,640 --> 00:20:12,920
Speaker 3: he had matched with and was talking to. He even

479
00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:15,560
Speaker 3: showed me the messages and they just talked about his

480
00:20:15,640 --> 00:20:18,119
Speaker 3: turmoil and me how much he loved me and wanted

481
00:20:18,160 --> 00:20:20,439
Speaker 3: to be with me. Our trust is still fragile and

482
00:20:20,520 --> 00:20:23,639
Speaker 3: being rebuilt, and this clearly means he was and is

483
00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:26,399
Speaker 3: lying to me about that time and what he was

484
00:20:26,480 --> 00:20:27,399
Speaker 3: truly doing.

485
00:20:27,800 --> 00:20:30,080
Speaker 4: Wow, you guys need to have another car. I don't

486
00:20:30,080 --> 00:20:33,520
Speaker 4: think this is necessarily like end of relationship, but I

487
00:20:33,520 --> 00:20:35,880
Speaker 4: think you guys need to have another conversation where you're

488
00:20:35,920 --> 00:20:37,879
Speaker 4: just like, hey, yeah, we just put it all of

489
00:20:37,920 --> 00:20:41,280
Speaker 4: our cards on the table because I'm overthinking everything. I'm

490
00:20:41,760 --> 00:20:45,040
Speaker 4: not feeling depressed. We need to talk about it because

491
00:20:45,040 --> 00:20:47,440
Speaker 4: I'm just filling in the gaps that you ripen me

492
00:20:47,520 --> 00:20:48,960
Speaker 4: and that's not healthy. Yeah.

493
00:20:49,119 --> 00:20:51,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, because it's really not like like it wouldn't be

494
00:20:51,520 --> 00:20:54,719
Speaker 3: an issue if they did anything together, if he like

495
00:20:55,359 --> 00:20:56,120
Speaker 3: was their women.

496
00:20:56,000 --> 00:21:00,000
Speaker 4: Or something like that. Like it's truly just about him lying. Yeah.

497
00:21:00,200 --> 00:21:02,080
Speaker 4: That seems to be a common theme in all these

498
00:21:02,080 --> 00:21:02,960
Speaker 4: little stories.

499
00:21:03,320 --> 00:21:07,440
Speaker 3: So yeah, but you can trust that we're never lying

500
00:21:07,480 --> 00:21:10,000
Speaker 3: to you when we say that. We're live on YouTube,

501
00:21:10,040 --> 00:21:13,439
Speaker 3: on Facebook, on everything every weekday three pm PST.

502
00:21:13,680 --> 00:21:15,520
Speaker 4: Just top our profile and you can join us. It's

503
00:21:15,520 --> 00:21:17,919
Speaker 4: all you gotta do. We're lying. Well, there's more to this,

504
00:21:17,960 --> 00:21:18,879
Speaker 4: so let's get into it.

505
00:21:18,960 --> 00:21:20,960
Speaker 3: I know I've said it in this post earlier, it's

506
00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:23,159
Speaker 3: in the past, but it just makes me feel so

507
00:21:23,400 --> 00:21:26,199
Speaker 3: completely terrible. I want to trust him. I want to

508
00:21:26,200 --> 00:21:28,679
Speaker 3: be the best Elsa I can be and let it go.

509
00:21:29,160 --> 00:21:31,760
Speaker 3: But I feel like I want to ask him about it.

510
00:21:31,800 --> 00:21:34,080
Speaker 3: I feel like I just want answers I may never

511
00:21:34,119 --> 00:21:37,000
Speaker 3: get and a truth that may never come to light. So, friends,

512
00:21:37,119 --> 00:21:40,000
Speaker 3: what should I do? So Sophia, what should we do?

513
00:21:40,280 --> 00:21:42,040
Speaker 4: Should she have to go to him and be like,

514
00:21:42,119 --> 00:21:44,680
Speaker 4: let's have a frank discussion and if he's still lying,

515
00:21:44,880 --> 00:21:48,080
Speaker 4: still kind of hiding the truth and stuff, then you know,

516
00:21:48,160 --> 00:21:50,760
Speaker 4: maybe this relationship can't work. Yeah. Also, I think you

517
00:21:50,840 --> 00:21:54,399
Speaker 4: need to stop snooping. Yeah, I don't think that's all. Yeah,

518
00:21:54,440 --> 00:21:56,600
Speaker 4: and you didn't have a conversation with him about like, Hey,

519
00:21:57,560 --> 00:21:59,520
Speaker 4: I've been feeling the need to snoop because I feel

520
00:21:59,520 --> 00:22:01,720
Speaker 4: like you're hiding for me. True, and I know that's unhealthy,

521
00:22:01,960 --> 00:22:04,080
Speaker 4: and you need to work on that too. Yeahah, I

522
00:22:04,119 --> 00:22:04,800
Speaker 4: totally agree.

523
00:22:04,840 --> 00:22:08,399
Speaker 3: I think snooping like, yeah, you might find some things

524
00:22:08,440 --> 00:22:12,479
Speaker 3: that seem suspicious, but also because you're snooping, Yeah, your

525
00:22:12,680 --> 00:22:15,920
Speaker 3: things might seem like they're suspicious already, you know what

526
00:22:15,960 --> 00:22:18,200
Speaker 3: I mean, Like it might not be, but it might

527
00:22:18,240 --> 00:22:20,359
Speaker 3: look at well, you guys are snooping and yeah, in

528
00:22:20,359 --> 00:22:22,959
Speaker 3: that mindset, in the process of finding out if your

529
00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:26,199
Speaker 3: partner has betrayed your trust, you are portraying third Yeah.

530
00:22:26,240 --> 00:22:28,800
Speaker 4: So you can't really do that though. It's a lose lose. Yeah.

531
00:22:28,840 --> 00:22:30,359
Speaker 4: So I like what you said about, like, you know,

532
00:22:30,440 --> 00:22:32,199
Speaker 4: if you feel the need to snoop, tell them that

533
00:22:32,520 --> 00:22:33,960
Speaker 4: instead of actually doing it. Yeah.

534
00:22:34,040 --> 00:22:36,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, Hey it's Sam, I'm your OG host. Here bring

535
00:22:36,600 --> 00:22:38,320
Speaker 2: it back to the stories. But here's three minutes bads

536
00:22:38,320 --> 00:22:39,399
Speaker 2: from our sponsored.

537
00:22:39,560 --> 00:22:43,359
Speaker 4: My stepsister planned my eighteenth birthday party, and I laughed

538
00:22:43,359 --> 00:22:49,080
Speaker 4: in her face, just like that. A little background. My

539
00:22:49,119 --> 00:22:51,640
Speaker 4: mom and dad separated when I was six and each

540
00:22:51,680 --> 00:22:54,400
Speaker 4: went their separate ways. Of course, they had joint custody

541
00:22:54,400 --> 00:22:57,159
Speaker 4: of me, but they both started new families. When I

542
00:22:57,240 --> 00:23:00,040
Speaker 4: was nine, my mom married a man let's call I

543
00:23:00,119 --> 00:23:03,720
Speaker 4: am Robert Okay, who already had a daughter let's call

544
00:23:03,760 --> 00:23:06,280
Speaker 4: her Kira, who was two years older than me. My

545
00:23:06,400 --> 00:23:09,119
Speaker 4: dad got engaged when I was eight to a wonderful woman,

546
00:23:09,359 --> 00:23:12,399
Speaker 4: let's call her Leila, who he married when I was twelve.

547
00:23:12,560 --> 00:23:14,800
Speaker 4: By the way, this comes from Tasty Word twenty seven

548
00:23:14,800 --> 00:23:17,480
Speaker 4: to forty seven on the Okay Storytime Separated. My relationship

549
00:23:17,520 --> 00:23:20,320
Speaker 4: with Leila is beautiful. She has truly been a mother

550
00:23:20,359 --> 00:23:23,040
Speaker 4: to me. She basically helped my dad raise me. She

551
00:23:23,200 --> 00:23:26,239
Speaker 4: takes an interest in my life. She comforts me, she

552
00:23:26,320 --> 00:23:29,240
Speaker 4: advises me. We have common interests, and we do many

553
00:23:29,320 --> 00:23:32,680
Speaker 4: activities together. She and I recently talked about the possibility

554
00:23:32,800 --> 00:23:35,679
Speaker 4: of having her legally adopt me as soon as I

555
00:23:35,720 --> 00:23:37,760
Speaker 4: come of age. Doing so now would be a bit

556
00:23:37,760 --> 00:23:41,200
Speaker 4: messy legally because of my parents' joint custody. Because for me,

557
00:23:41,520 --> 00:23:43,679
Speaker 4: she is my real mother and I want it to

558
00:23:43,720 --> 00:23:46,800
Speaker 4: be official. That's lovely. My relationship with my bio mother,

559
00:23:46,920 --> 00:23:50,720
Speaker 4: on the other hand, is almost nonexistent. Even though I

560
00:23:50,840 --> 00:23:53,400
Speaker 4: was forced to spend specific days with her, we never

561
00:23:53,520 --> 00:23:55,879
Speaker 4: managed to bond because she spent all of her time

562
00:23:56,119 --> 00:23:59,639
Speaker 4: giving attention and affection to Kira, who already has her

563
00:23:59,640 --> 00:24:02,000
Speaker 4: own mind. Even when she tried to involve me in

564
00:24:02,040 --> 00:24:05,239
Speaker 4: some activity. She always included Kira, and we had to

565
00:24:05,400 --> 00:24:07,960
Speaker 4: do only what Kira liked. At a certain point, I

566
00:24:08,000 --> 00:24:11,199
Speaker 4: started to decline her invitations and often asked if I

567
00:24:11,240 --> 00:24:13,800
Speaker 4: could avoid going to her on the set days because

568
00:24:13,840 --> 00:24:16,720
Speaker 4: I was almost always ignored or left aside, and I

569
00:24:16,800 --> 00:24:19,159
Speaker 4: prefer to stay at home with my father and Leila.

570
00:24:19,400 --> 00:24:21,840
Speaker 4: My father always tried to understand me, but he also

571
00:24:21,840 --> 00:24:25,120
Speaker 4: had to honor the rules set by the judge, which is, yeah,

572
00:24:25,240 --> 00:24:28,680
Speaker 4: that's that's really hard by the judge. When I got

573
00:24:28,720 --> 00:24:30,879
Speaker 4: more mature, he admitted that he was afraid that my

574
00:24:30,960 --> 00:24:33,240
Speaker 4: mother might make some mean move in court if he

575
00:24:33,320 --> 00:24:34,960
Speaker 4: agreed to not let me go to her on the

576
00:24:35,000 --> 00:24:37,840
Speaker 4: appointed days. Yeah, this is something my mother would do.

577
00:24:38,040 --> 00:24:41,440
Speaker 4: After knowing this, I understood my father's reasons and I

578
00:24:41,520 --> 00:24:44,119
Speaker 4: absolutely don't want to put him in trouble. So I

579
00:24:44,160 --> 00:24:47,600
Speaker 4: didn't make such requests anymore, and I respected my schedule.

580
00:24:47,760 --> 00:24:50,639
Speaker 4: Now let's get to the point. In two weeks, I

581
00:24:51,000 --> 00:24:54,199
Speaker 4: will finally turn eighteen. I was lucky because my birthday

582
00:24:54,200 --> 00:24:56,159
Speaker 4: falls on the days I have to stay with my dad,

583
00:24:56,359 --> 00:24:59,439
Speaker 4: so he, Leila and I started planning my birthday a

584
00:24:59,480 --> 00:25:01,760
Speaker 4: month ago. It will be nothing too crazy, just a

585
00:25:01,800 --> 00:25:04,480
Speaker 4: party with family and friends. My favorite pizza place a

586
00:25:04,560 --> 00:25:06,480
Speaker 4: casual night where I just want to have fun with

587
00:25:06,520 --> 00:25:08,359
Speaker 4: the people I care about and do what I like.

588
00:25:08,560 --> 00:25:11,320
Speaker 4: The place also is karaoke, and I love singing. That

589
00:25:11,320 --> 00:25:12,879
Speaker 4: sounds great. I really want to do a piece of night.

590
00:25:13,000 --> 00:25:15,680
Speaker 4: She'd go pizza karaoke. Well, I don't know where a

591
00:25:15,760 --> 00:25:17,720
Speaker 4: pizza karaoke place is, but I do know a great

592
00:25:17,720 --> 00:25:18,800
Speaker 4: pizza place in the valley.

593
00:25:18,840 --> 00:25:21,440
Speaker 1: I can make any karaoke place a pizza place by

594
00:25:21,560 --> 00:25:24,520
Speaker 1: ordering pizza to the karaoke place genius boom.

595
00:25:24,720 --> 00:25:27,560
Speaker 4: Of course, after booking and setting everything up, we sent

596
00:25:27,600 --> 00:25:31,240
Speaker 4: out the invitations and this extended to my mother as well. Honestly,

597
00:25:31,320 --> 00:25:33,480
Speaker 4: I didn't really want her there, but then I thought

598
00:25:33,520 --> 00:25:35,639
Speaker 4: that this would actually be the last time I was

599
00:25:35,680 --> 00:25:38,880
Speaker 4: forced to be involved with her, because once I turn eighteen,

600
00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:41,800
Speaker 4: I won't be forced to follow the judge's rules anymore.

601
00:25:42,000 --> 00:25:44,800
Speaker 4: So we sent out the invitations two days ago, and

602
00:25:44,880 --> 00:25:47,240
Speaker 4: we already had most of the answers so we could

603
00:25:47,280 --> 00:25:49,639
Speaker 4: organize the precise number to send to the pizza place.

604
00:25:49,760 --> 00:25:52,359
Speaker 4: The only thing missing was my mother, who saw the

605
00:25:52,400 --> 00:25:56,119
Speaker 4: text and didn't respond. That's ridiculous, I told my father

606
00:25:56,200 --> 00:25:58,520
Speaker 4: that I would not insist and if she didn't respond,

607
00:25:58,640 --> 00:26:00,560
Speaker 4: then it meant that she didn't want to come, and

608
00:26:00,600 --> 00:26:02,480
Speaker 4: I was fine with that. I think my father was

609
00:26:02,520 --> 00:26:05,280
Speaker 4: also a little relieved by the idea, even if he

610
00:26:05,359 --> 00:26:07,800
Speaker 4: didn't say it openly, but I could see it on

611
00:26:07,880 --> 00:26:12,639
Speaker 4: his face anyway. The drama started this afternoon. It's all

612
00:26:12,720 --> 00:26:13,479
Speaker 4: was gonna be drama.

613
00:26:13,720 --> 00:26:15,920
Speaker 1: No, not the drama.

614
00:26:16,040 --> 00:26:16,240
Speaker 3: No.

615
00:26:16,760 --> 00:26:19,880
Speaker 4: My mother called me very angry, accusing me of being

616
00:26:20,040 --> 00:26:22,800
Speaker 4: childish and that I shouldn't have planned anything without telling

617
00:26:22,800 --> 00:26:25,480
Speaker 4: her first girl she did, she did?

618
00:26:25,640 --> 00:26:27,359
Speaker 1: Are we ignoring reality again?

619
00:26:27,640 --> 00:26:29,679
Speaker 4: Did we look at her phone? This left me a

620
00:26:29,680 --> 00:26:33,040
Speaker 4: little confused, and I reminded her that I always planned

621
00:26:33,080 --> 00:26:35,879
Speaker 4: all my birthdays with Dad and Layla. Most of the

622
00:26:35,880 --> 00:26:39,560
Speaker 4: time she didn't even remember, so complaining now was quite hypocritical.

623
00:26:39,680 --> 00:26:42,720
Speaker 4: This makes her even angrier and started attacking me because

624
00:26:42,800 --> 00:26:45,840
Speaker 4: Kira has been crying ever since I sent the invitation

625
00:26:45,920 --> 00:26:48,040
Speaker 4: to my mother, because she had already planned a whole

626
00:26:48,040 --> 00:26:52,800
Speaker 4: birthday party for me. What you could say, okay, okay, One,

627
00:26:53,800 --> 00:26:57,160
Speaker 4: why is she so upset? And two you can still

628
00:26:57,240 --> 00:26:59,680
Speaker 4: plan that birthday party, just on a different day.

629
00:27:00,160 --> 00:27:04,879
Speaker 1: This is just feeling like somebody who enjoys the process

630
00:27:04,920 --> 00:27:05,840
Speaker 1: of being upset.

631
00:27:06,080 --> 00:27:10,520
Speaker 4: Yes, and it makes everything about her like always the victim.

632
00:27:10,280 --> 00:27:14,359
Speaker 1: The feeling of being upset and spreading it to others.

633
00:27:15,040 --> 00:27:17,199
Speaker 1: There are some people who just can't get enough of that,

634
00:27:17,560 --> 00:27:20,760
Speaker 1: and I certainly wish they would and just stop it.

635
00:27:20,800 --> 00:27:24,439
Speaker 4: Just freaking stop it. It's really embarrassing for you.

636
00:27:24,560 --> 00:27:25,119
Speaker 1: It's cringe.

637
00:27:25,560 --> 00:27:28,679
Speaker 4: And I was really speechless because the relationship between me

638
00:27:28,800 --> 00:27:33,360
Speaker 4: and Kira is zero. She is the classic spoiled princess,

639
00:27:33,400 --> 00:27:35,640
Speaker 4: oh spoiled brat who always wants to be the center

640
00:27:35,680 --> 00:27:38,640
Speaker 4: of attention, and my mother has always supported this behavior

641
00:27:38,680 --> 00:27:41,479
Speaker 4: of hers, making it worse, and clearly she and I

642
00:27:41,520 --> 00:27:44,679
Speaker 4: have never got along. I just didn't understand why the

643
00:27:44,720 --> 00:27:46,760
Speaker 4: heck Kia wanted to organize a birthday party for me.

644
00:27:46,880 --> 00:27:50,000
Speaker 4: It didn't make sense. It doesn't make sense. I asked

645
00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:53,080
Speaker 4: her why she did it, and especially why she did

646
00:27:53,119 --> 00:27:55,040
Speaker 4: it without telling me. I mean, she didn't really think

647
00:27:55,040 --> 00:27:57,480
Speaker 4: I wouldn't make any plans for my eighteenth birthday, right.

648
00:27:57,640 --> 00:28:01,199
Speaker 4: It was ridiculous my mother that it was supposed to

649
00:28:01,320 --> 00:28:04,520
Speaker 4: be a surprise, and since I didn't tell her about

650
00:28:04,520 --> 00:28:06,520
Speaker 4: my plans, she thought I didn't want to do anything.

651
00:28:06,520 --> 00:28:10,159
Speaker 4: For my birthday. And I mean she could have asked, no, no, yeah, no,

652
00:28:10,320 --> 00:28:13,000
Speaker 4: I don't she doesn't get she would ask the thing

653
00:28:13,119 --> 00:28:16,200
Speaker 4: is like, your mom's for your mom. Your birthday isn't

654
00:28:16,240 --> 00:28:19,440
Speaker 4: about you, It is about her showing that she's this

655
00:28:19,640 --> 00:28:20,280
Speaker 4: amazing mother.

656
00:28:20,440 --> 00:28:22,640
Speaker 1: Well, it's actually your mom's birthing day.

657
00:28:22,720 --> 00:28:25,040
Speaker 4: Yeah, you selfish. It's like it's when I had to

658
00:28:25,080 --> 00:28:25,680
Speaker 4: push you out.

659
00:28:25,760 --> 00:28:28,399
Speaker 1: Don't you realize this was the day I gave birth

660
00:28:28,480 --> 00:28:28,719
Speaker 1: to you.

661
00:28:29,600 --> 00:28:32,439
Speaker 4: But here comes the worst part, and I admit the

662
00:28:32,440 --> 00:28:34,639
Speaker 4: one that made me lose my cool. My mother started

663
00:28:34,680 --> 00:28:37,600
Speaker 4: listing all the things Kira had prepared for my party,

664
00:28:37,760 --> 00:28:39,960
Speaker 4: maybe to rub in my face what I would have missed,

665
00:28:40,040 --> 00:28:42,880
Speaker 4: and they were all Kira's favorite activities, things that I

666
00:28:42,920 --> 00:28:46,000
Speaker 4: didn't like. She had booked a fish restaurant for lunch.

667
00:28:46,240 --> 00:28:48,840
Speaker 4: I don't even eat fish, not because of some whim

668
00:28:48,920 --> 00:28:51,440
Speaker 4: but because it makes me feel sick. Just smelling fish

669
00:28:51,480 --> 00:28:54,240
Speaker 4: makes me feel nauseous. I'm not allergic. I had a checked.

670
00:28:54,360 --> 00:28:57,440
Speaker 4: My body simply rejects it. She also booked an afternoon

671
00:28:57,480 --> 00:28:59,640
Speaker 4: activity at a ranch near the city where my mother

672
00:28:59,640 --> 00:29:02,040
Speaker 4: now lives, where you can ride horses, and well, I

673
00:29:02,040 --> 00:29:04,600
Speaker 4: don't like it. I have nothing against horses in particular,

674
00:29:04,720 --> 00:29:07,160
Speaker 4: but the idea of riding one or getting really close

675
00:29:07,200 --> 00:29:09,960
Speaker 4: to an animal that big scares me. Then she thought

676
00:29:10,000 --> 00:29:12,280
Speaker 4: about going back to my mom's house for a backyard

677
00:29:12,280 --> 00:29:14,240
Speaker 4: barbecue for dinner, and I just don't want to do

678
00:29:14,280 --> 00:29:15,960
Speaker 4: that because I don't want to spend more time with

679
00:29:16,000 --> 00:29:19,520
Speaker 4: my mom than I have to. If this wasn't, you know,

680
00:29:19,960 --> 00:29:24,000
Speaker 4: a really awful idea for Opie's birthday, and I wouldn't

681
00:29:24,000 --> 00:29:25,840
Speaker 4: have to be with the mom or Kira, this would

682
00:29:25,840 --> 00:29:26,080
Speaker 4: be fun.

683
00:29:26,160 --> 00:29:28,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean if. But the thing is that it's

684
00:29:28,880 --> 00:29:31,160
Speaker 1: like so you're like, if this entire thing was not

685
00:29:31,360 --> 00:29:32,360
Speaker 1: at all how it was.

686
00:29:32,600 --> 00:29:35,880
Speaker 4: Well, no, the fish and the horse and the barbecue,

687
00:29:35,880 --> 00:29:37,760
Speaker 4: that sounds like a great time for me, I mean,

688
00:29:38,720 --> 00:29:41,520
Speaker 4: and that's who really matters, right exactly. My mother also

689
00:29:41,560 --> 00:29:44,200
Speaker 4: said they already sent out invitations to everyone to who

690
00:29:45,000 --> 00:29:47,320
Speaker 4: and at that point I was really speechless, but I

691
00:29:47,360 --> 00:29:50,360
Speaker 4: asked her who she had sent them to, because my friends,

692
00:29:50,360 --> 00:29:53,160
Speaker 4: my dad and his family hadn't received anything. It turns

693
00:29:53,160 --> 00:29:55,640
Speaker 4: out the invites were mostly sent out to Robert's family,

694
00:29:55,760 --> 00:29:58,880
Speaker 4: my mom's family, and Kira's friends. Honestly, it just sounds

695
00:29:58,920 --> 00:29:59,600
Speaker 4: like here's birthday.

696
00:29:59,640 --> 00:30:02,880
Speaker 1: Here's a party for herself, and it is like, oh,

697
00:30:03,120 --> 00:30:06,000
Speaker 1: oh that's on Oh that's on her birthday. Okay, okay,

698
00:30:06,080 --> 00:30:07,680
Speaker 1: let's call it. This is your birthday party.

699
00:30:07,680 --> 00:30:09,480
Speaker 4: Now, it's your birthday party. It's oh, he's birthday party.

700
00:30:10,080 --> 00:30:12,600
Speaker 4: I mean it was basically a party organized by Kira

701
00:30:12,680 --> 00:30:14,960
Speaker 4: for herself, but under the pretext that it was for

702
00:30:15,040 --> 00:30:18,040
Speaker 4: my birthday. So I didn't hold back anymore. I laughed

703
00:30:18,040 --> 00:30:20,360
Speaker 4: in my mother's face and hung up the phone.

704
00:30:20,400 --> 00:30:21,000
Speaker 1: There it is.

705
00:30:21,400 --> 00:30:24,160
Speaker 4: It was all too ridiculous to be true. Come on.

706
00:30:24,600 --> 00:30:27,120
Speaker 4: My dad came to me a little while ago, saying

707
00:30:27,160 --> 00:30:29,640
Speaker 4: that my mom called him mad because I laughed in

708
00:30:29,680 --> 00:30:31,360
Speaker 4: her face when she told me about the party they

709
00:30:31,360 --> 00:30:33,760
Speaker 4: had organized for me, and he was very upset about it.

710
00:30:33,800 --> 00:30:35,920
Speaker 4: He was starting to say that despite all the feelings

711
00:30:35,920 --> 00:30:38,000
Speaker 4: I had for my mom, they were trying to do

712
00:30:38,080 --> 00:30:40,280
Speaker 4: a nice thing for once, but I stopped him right

713
00:30:40,320 --> 00:30:43,840
Speaker 4: away and explained in detail how the party had been organized,

714
00:30:44,040 --> 00:30:47,000
Speaker 4: a detail that my mom apparently left out with him.

715
00:30:47,160 --> 00:30:50,680
Speaker 4: His expression changed quickly. He just said, I've got to

716
00:30:50,680 --> 00:30:52,640
Speaker 4: make a phone call. And I've been hearing him yelling

717
00:30:52,720 --> 00:30:55,600
Speaker 4: at my mom for at least twenty minutes by. Now, Wow,

718
00:30:55,720 --> 00:30:58,160
Speaker 4: Layla came to me after learning about the situation and

719
00:30:58,200 --> 00:30:59,800
Speaker 4: said that, as much as she could relate to me,

720
00:31:00,040 --> 00:31:01,880
Speaker 4: I was a little rude to laugh in my mother's

721
00:31:01,920 --> 00:31:03,960
Speaker 4: face and hang up without explaining, Okay, why are we

722
00:31:04,000 --> 00:31:06,840
Speaker 4: why are we defending mom here? She sucks for her.

723
00:31:06,960 --> 00:31:08,960
Speaker 4: I should have spoken out like an adult despite my

724
00:31:09,000 --> 00:31:12,920
Speaker 4: feelings and sort things out in a civil and mature way.

725
00:31:13,000 --> 00:31:15,120
Speaker 4: Oh okay, so Leila is saying you could have tried

726
00:31:15,160 --> 00:31:16,960
Speaker 4: to do it a little bit more maturely. She wasn't angry,

727
00:31:17,160 --> 00:31:19,560
Speaker 4: just a bit disappointed about how I acted. As soon

728
00:31:19,600 --> 00:31:22,080
Speaker 4: as she left, I thought about my actions and maybe

729
00:31:22,120 --> 00:31:24,440
Speaker 4: I was a little hasty, But I don't think talking

730
00:31:24,480 --> 00:31:26,520
Speaker 4: to my mom about it would have helped, honestly, but

731
00:31:26,600 --> 00:31:28,920
Speaker 4: maybe I could have handled it better. I'm starting to

732
00:31:28,920 --> 00:31:30,280
Speaker 4: think I was a bit of an a hole in

733
00:31:30,320 --> 00:31:33,720
Speaker 4: that moment. And there is an update. Now. I don't

734
00:31:33,760 --> 00:31:36,160
Speaker 4: know your parents. I get like, Okay, your dad and

735
00:31:36,280 --> 00:31:38,520
Speaker 4: Layla are being your parents, and they're like, you have

736
00:31:38,600 --> 00:31:41,680
Speaker 4: to be nice to people regardless. But ah, I'm not

737
00:31:41,800 --> 00:31:44,440
Speaker 4: your parent, man. I think your mom's a bit of

738
00:31:44,480 --> 00:31:46,960
Speaker 4: an ale and I don't care if her feelings were

739
00:31:47,000 --> 00:31:49,880
Speaker 4: hurt because she's not thinking about your birthday at all. Exactly.

740
00:31:50,040 --> 00:31:53,040
Speaker 1: Go off, queen, Yeah, go off, queen. Yeah, you had

741
00:31:53,080 --> 00:31:55,240
Speaker 1: your dirt today. I can tell I've had my dirt.

742
00:31:55,400 --> 00:31:57,640
Speaker 1: Ye's plenty of like a five heap it Wait, how

743
00:31:57,640 --> 00:31:59,000
Speaker 1: many spoonfuls of dirt have you had?

744
00:31:59,080 --> 00:32:01,760
Speaker 4: There is a lot of in here. I gotta be honest.

745
00:32:01,880 --> 00:32:04,560
Speaker 4: You can see. It's like when I was choking earlier.

746
00:32:04,840 --> 00:32:07,120
Speaker 4: It just got a huge klump of macha. I don't

747
00:32:07,120 --> 00:32:09,960
Speaker 4: know how much watch is anything there is, but it's sad.

748
00:32:10,880 --> 00:32:11,440
Speaker 4: I'm wired.

749
00:32:11,560 --> 00:32:15,360
Speaker 1: There's literally dirt in that cup. It's just green flavored

750
00:32:15,360 --> 00:32:16,280
Speaker 1: and full of caffeine.

751
00:32:17,080 --> 00:32:19,680
Speaker 4: Uh shoot, you got anything?

752
00:32:19,840 --> 00:32:23,880
Speaker 1: I mean literally? Uh uh no, you hit them all literally.

753
00:32:24,200 --> 00:32:25,840
Speaker 1: I was just letting you take I was letting it.

754
00:32:26,200 --> 00:32:28,080
Speaker 1: Did you take that one away? I appreciate it because

755
00:32:28,080 --> 00:32:30,680
Speaker 1: you were like, you know what, not your mama.

756
00:32:31,080 --> 00:32:34,560
Speaker 4: I'm not show nanny. I don't like that lady. I

757
00:32:34,840 --> 00:32:37,440
Speaker 4: like her one bit. But there is an up to Okay,

758
00:32:37,760 --> 00:32:39,480
Speaker 4: I didn't think my post, but get all of this

759
00:32:39,560 --> 00:32:42,240
Speaker 4: attention well, but thank you all for the good wishes

760
00:32:42,400 --> 00:32:44,920
Speaker 4: and words of comfort. I read all your comments and

761
00:32:45,000 --> 00:32:47,640
Speaker 4: decided to follow some advice. First of all, I talked

762
00:32:47,680 --> 00:32:50,400
Speaker 4: to Layla about my reaction to my mother. Layla raised

763
00:32:50,400 --> 00:32:53,520
Speaker 4: me on the importance of communication and always pushing me

764
00:32:53,600 --> 00:32:55,960
Speaker 4: to talk about my problems so I could solve them.

765
00:32:56,160 --> 00:32:58,720
Speaker 4: So I see where her comment about my behavior came from,

766
00:32:58,760 --> 00:33:00,720
Speaker 4: and I understand it. But I also gave her my

767
00:33:00,760 --> 00:33:03,080
Speaker 4: point of view, telling her that the situation my mother

768
00:33:03,200 --> 00:33:06,240
Speaker 4: was explaining was too absurd and laughing is the only

769
00:33:06,360 --> 00:33:09,000
Speaker 4: natural instinct that came to me while my mother was talking.

770
00:33:09,040 --> 00:33:11,239
Speaker 4: At some point, I thought, is it a joke or

771
00:33:11,240 --> 00:33:13,640
Speaker 4: some sort of bad prank. Is she making this all up?

772
00:33:13,720 --> 00:33:17,560
Speaker 4: Because her bs was absolutely ridiculous. Leyla said she understood me,

773
00:33:17,720 --> 00:33:19,760
Speaker 4: and as many of you have told me, she just

774
00:33:19,800 --> 00:33:22,560
Speaker 4: wanted me to understand that there will be situations in

775
00:33:22,600 --> 00:33:24,720
Speaker 4: my life where I can't just laugh and hang up

776
00:33:24,760 --> 00:33:27,200
Speaker 4: the phone. And she was just worried about my reaction.

777
00:33:27,360 --> 00:33:29,280
Speaker 1: Okay, but to be fair, that is one hundred percent

778
00:33:29,280 --> 00:33:30,960
Speaker 1: of situation where you can just left.

779
00:33:31,160 --> 00:33:34,120
Speaker 4: Yeah, phe Yeah, the valid reaction.

780
00:33:34,400 --> 00:33:36,240
Speaker 1: I mean, just because you do it in this one

781
00:33:36,280 --> 00:33:38,320
Speaker 1: context doesn't mean you're gonna do it like when your

782
00:33:38,360 --> 00:33:41,720
Speaker 1: boss calls you, yeah, don't like, don't like laugh in

783
00:33:41,760 --> 00:33:43,280
Speaker 1: your boss's face and hang up the phone.

784
00:33:43,360 --> 00:33:44,720
Speaker 4: Yeah, I feel like it's a different way to out

785
00:33:44,720 --> 00:33:47,560
Speaker 4: of the conversation. Anyway, we managed to clear the matter

786
00:33:47,600 --> 00:33:49,600
Speaker 4: between us, and I'm happy. I had also talked to

787
00:33:49,600 --> 00:33:51,440
Speaker 4: my dad about the phone call he had with my mom.

788
00:33:51,600 --> 00:33:54,920
Speaker 4: Apparently my mom had an excuse for everything. She said

789
00:33:54,920 --> 00:33:57,440
Speaker 4: that Kira just wanted to do a nice sisterly gesture

790
00:33:57,480 --> 00:33:59,720
Speaker 4: on my big days, that on my big day, that

791
00:33:59,760 --> 00:34:02,400
Speaker 4: she wanted to share her hobby riding horses with me,

792
00:34:02,600 --> 00:34:04,560
Speaker 4: and that she never thought my fish problem was a

793
00:34:04,600 --> 00:34:07,280
Speaker 4: real problem but just a whim and the restaurant they

794
00:34:07,280 --> 00:34:09,040
Speaker 4: had booked at made the best fish around.

795
00:34:09,160 --> 00:34:13,120
Speaker 1: Oh that's cool. That's like saying that the doodoo factory

796
00:34:13,160 --> 00:34:15,080
Speaker 1: makes the best doodoo around. I don't like it, as

797
00:34:15,160 --> 00:34:17,279
Speaker 1: doo doo. Don't like the Dad, you can't make me

798
00:34:17,400 --> 00:34:19,880
Speaker 1: like it. I don't like it. Yeah, I just wanted

799
00:34:19,880 --> 00:34:23,840
Speaker 1: her to enjoy my hobby. No, you silly little goose.

800
00:34:24,120 --> 00:34:26,120
Speaker 1: On someone's birthday, you enjoy.

801
00:34:26,080 --> 00:34:30,359
Speaker 4: Their hobby anyway. And that last one is a lie,

802
00:34:30,440 --> 00:34:32,480
Speaker 4: because when I was little, I threw up a couple

803
00:34:32,600 --> 00:34:34,640
Speaker 4: times in front of my mom just because we went

804
00:34:34,719 --> 00:34:37,759
Speaker 4: somewhere that smelled strongly of fish, so she knows very

805
00:34:37,800 --> 00:34:40,200
Speaker 4: well it's a real issue for me. My dad retorted

806
00:34:40,200 --> 00:34:42,160
Speaker 4: that nothing they had prepared had been done for me,

807
00:34:42,360 --> 00:34:44,880
Speaker 4: that Kira had clearly planned the party for herself, and

808
00:34:44,960 --> 00:34:47,279
Speaker 4: what kind of party was it for me if none

809
00:34:47,280 --> 00:34:49,880
Speaker 4: of my important people were there. My mother didn't respond

810
00:34:49,920 --> 00:34:52,520
Speaker 4: to this. She just started ranting that I was ungrateful

811
00:34:52,560 --> 00:34:54,960
Speaker 4: and spoiled. So my father told her to go to

812
00:34:55,000 --> 00:34:58,440
Speaker 4: eck and hung up the phone. Oh yeah, sick, father,

813
00:34:59,080 --> 00:34:59,959
Speaker 4: w Dad, that's why.

814
00:35:00,000 --> 00:35:02,360
Speaker 1: Wish they were still flip phones, because it's so satisfied.

815
00:35:03,080 --> 00:35:05,960
Speaker 4: Yeah, you could just break your phone well yeah, yeah,

816
00:35:06,000 --> 00:35:09,239
Speaker 4: when you're trying to go off grid and then.

817
00:35:11,200 --> 00:35:12,640
Speaker 1: Break your smartphone in half.

818
00:35:12,840 --> 00:35:15,280
Speaker 4: Yeah, So I never want to talk to you again.

819
00:35:16,160 --> 00:35:18,800
Speaker 4: After hearing this, I decided to follow another piece of

820
00:35:18,840 --> 00:35:21,200
Speaker 4: advice you gave me and wrote a message to my mother.

821
00:35:21,320 --> 00:35:24,799
Speaker 4: This time, I decided to be mature and wrote the

822
00:35:24,840 --> 00:35:27,880
Speaker 4: message in the most polite way possible. I apologized for laughing,

823
00:35:28,000 --> 00:35:30,120
Speaker 4: but what she was saying was too ridiculous, so it

824
00:35:30,160 --> 00:35:32,920
Speaker 4: was the only possible reaction from my side. I reminded

825
00:35:32,960 --> 00:35:34,960
Speaker 4: her that she never put any effort into building a

826
00:35:35,000 --> 00:35:37,319
Speaker 4: relationship with me. That she doesn't know me at all

827
00:35:37,680 --> 00:35:40,279
Speaker 4: and has never cared about getting to know me, and

828
00:35:40,360 --> 00:35:43,600
Speaker 4: since the birthday party Kira organized only had things that

829
00:35:43,719 --> 00:35:46,200
Speaker 4: Kia liked, they could enjoy it together with their family

830
00:35:46,200 --> 00:35:48,680
Speaker 4: and friends. I also told her that her invitation to

831
00:35:48,719 --> 00:35:51,719
Speaker 4: my pizza party was withdrawn. You're no longer invited to

832
00:35:51,719 --> 00:35:52,560
Speaker 4: my birthday party.

833
00:35:52,640 --> 00:35:55,759
Speaker 1: You are no longer invited to chuck e cheese, and.

834
00:35:55,680 --> 00:35:58,040
Speaker 4: She shouldn't bother showing up since she had already made

835
00:35:58,080 --> 00:36:00,960
Speaker 4: it clear with the last phone call what priorities were

836
00:36:01,120 --> 00:36:02,719
Speaker 4: and now I was going to do it too, and

837
00:36:02,760 --> 00:36:06,640
Speaker 4: she was absolutely not on my priority list. I already

838
00:36:06,719 --> 00:36:08,920
Speaker 4: have Leila as a mother, and I can't be I

839
00:36:08,960 --> 00:36:11,560
Speaker 4: can't be more happy with her. I concluded by wishing

840
00:36:11,560 --> 00:36:13,719
Speaker 4: her well with her new family and asked her not

841
00:36:13,840 --> 00:36:17,239
Speaker 4: to contact me again. Don't call me, don't come by

842
00:36:17,320 --> 00:36:21,200
Speaker 4: my house. We're done. We're done. She read the message

843
00:36:21,200 --> 00:36:23,279
Speaker 4: but didn't respond, and I'm fine with that. If she

844
00:36:23,320 --> 00:36:25,800
Speaker 4: were to respond, I'm sure would just be more complaints

845
00:36:25,840 --> 00:36:29,799
Speaker 4: about me being ungrateful and spoiled, because I know that

846
00:36:29,880 --> 00:36:32,839
Speaker 4: talking to her is useless. She would not understand or

847
00:36:32,880 --> 00:36:35,600
Speaker 4: pretend not to understand. But clarifying things once and for

848
00:36:35,680 --> 00:36:38,720
Speaker 4: all has put an end to our situation. At least

849
00:36:38,760 --> 00:36:40,759
Speaker 4: on my side, I had a sort of closure, and

850
00:36:40,800 --> 00:36:43,080
Speaker 4: I thank you all for that. I probably would have

851
00:36:43,080 --> 00:36:46,080
Speaker 4: given up and ended contact with her after my eighteenth

852
00:36:46,239 --> 00:36:50,040
Speaker 4: without saying anything, but your comments helped me understand that

853
00:36:50,120 --> 00:36:53,279
Speaker 4: a firm end was necessary. For those who asked how

854
00:36:53,320 --> 00:36:55,400
Speaker 4: my mom could throw me a surprise party when I

855
00:36:55,520 --> 00:36:58,040
Speaker 4: wasn't with her, my dad asked her the same question,

856
00:36:58,239 --> 00:37:00,560
Speaker 4: along with asking her how she could think he wouldn't

857
00:37:00,560 --> 00:37:03,080
Speaker 4: throw me an eighteenth birthday party. My dad took it

858
00:37:03,120 --> 00:37:05,720
Speaker 4: a bit personally, lol, and she said they had planned

859
00:37:05,719 --> 00:37:07,960
Speaker 4: for Robert to come get me the morning of my birthday,

860
00:37:08,040 --> 00:37:08,960
Speaker 4: so they just assumed that.

861
00:37:08,960 --> 00:37:09,080
Speaker 1: Oh.

862
00:37:09,120 --> 00:37:12,520
Speaker 4: People's like, they're like, yeah, oh, he's a loser. She's

863
00:37:12,560 --> 00:37:15,040
Speaker 4: probably got nothing going on for her birthday.

864
00:37:15,440 --> 00:37:20,720
Speaker 1: You just gotta love the uh ohdesha, the loving care

865
00:37:20,960 --> 00:37:24,560
Speaker 1: of family at all times. Yeah, they all they did.

866
00:37:24,640 --> 00:37:26,920
Speaker 1: All these people did. All these people are guilty of

867
00:37:27,280 --> 00:37:30,200
Speaker 1: are trying to throw opia party? Yeah no, just kid,

868
00:37:30,320 --> 00:37:31,839
Speaker 1: this isn't hard mode. These people suck.

869
00:37:31,960 --> 00:37:33,040
Speaker 4: These people breaking.

870
00:37:34,360 --> 00:37:36,920
Speaker 1: A party and you when you have it doesn't matter

871
00:37:37,000 --> 00:37:39,319
Speaker 1: what the nature of the relationship is. If you have

872
00:37:39,400 --> 00:37:41,520
Speaker 1: relationships in your life that don't serve you in are

873
00:37:41,600 --> 00:37:45,239
Speaker 1: actively a negative force, you can feel free to cut

874
00:37:45,239 --> 00:37:47,840
Speaker 1: them off. Yeah please, m m mm hmmm.

875
00:37:48,600 --> 00:37:51,600
Speaker 4: So true. Explain the situation to Dad and Laila and

876
00:37:51,640 --> 00:37:54,880
Speaker 4: then take me to my mom's house under some pretense. Honestly,

877
00:37:55,000 --> 00:37:56,919
Speaker 4: I don't know how it would have worked. I would

878
00:37:56,920 --> 00:37:58,680
Speaker 4: have flat out refused to go to my mother's if

879
00:37:58,719 --> 00:38:02,080
Speaker 4: it wasn't our set days, no matter what excuse they

880
00:38:02,080 --> 00:38:04,400
Speaker 4: would have made up. And most of all, I would

881
00:38:04,440 --> 00:38:06,400
Speaker 4: never have left Leila and Dad to go to my

882
00:38:06,440 --> 00:38:08,520
Speaker 4: mom's on my eighteenth birthday. It would have been one

883
00:38:08,560 --> 00:38:10,719
Speaker 4: thing if my mother and I had a good relationship,

884
00:38:10,760 --> 00:38:13,000
Speaker 4: but that was definitely not the case in all of this.

885
00:38:13,200 --> 00:38:16,120
Speaker 4: The only person I don't feel like blaming is Robert.

886
00:38:16,400 --> 00:38:18,520
Speaker 4: We never had a close relationship, but he was always

887
00:38:18,560 --> 00:38:21,000
Speaker 4: polite to me when we lived under the same roof.

888
00:38:21,040 --> 00:38:24,239
Speaker 4: He even cleared out his study so I could have

889
00:38:24,280 --> 00:38:26,239
Speaker 4: a permanent room in his house when I went to

890
00:38:26,239 --> 00:38:28,919
Speaker 4: my mother's. That's nice, said Robert. We didn't develop any

891
00:38:28,960 --> 00:38:31,560
Speaker 4: stepdaughter's stepfather bond, but he always tried to be kind

892
00:38:31,560 --> 00:38:33,360
Speaker 4: to me, So I don't blame him for any of this.

893
00:38:33,760 --> 00:38:36,680
Speaker 4: It's likely that he really thinks the party is for me.

894
00:38:37,000 --> 00:38:38,719
Speaker 4: We don't know each other well enough for him to

895
00:38:38,800 --> 00:38:41,080
Speaker 4: know my tastes unless my mother told him, which I

896
00:38:41,120 --> 00:38:43,920
Speaker 4: highly doubt she did. Luckily, I didn't leave anything of

897
00:38:43,960 --> 00:38:46,239
Speaker 4: mine at my mother's house either. All of my things

898
00:38:46,280 --> 00:38:48,879
Speaker 4: are here at my father's house permanently. Usually I would

899
00:38:48,960 --> 00:38:50,960
Speaker 4: unpack my suitcase when I went to my mother's with

900
00:38:51,000 --> 00:38:53,239
Speaker 4: the things I needed for those days, and then bring

901
00:38:53,280 --> 00:38:55,319
Speaker 4: them back when I went back to my father's. I

902
00:38:55,360 --> 00:38:58,920
Speaker 4: never felt safe leaving anything to her because Robert's family

903
00:38:58,960 --> 00:39:01,839
Speaker 4: and Keir's friends came over often, and I didn't want

904
00:39:01,840 --> 00:39:04,879
Speaker 4: to leave anything of mine out in the open to strangers.

905
00:39:04,960 --> 00:39:06,759
Speaker 4: But I want to put it out in the open

906
00:39:06,800 --> 00:39:08,680
Speaker 4: that you can join us live every weekd at three

907
00:39:08,680 --> 00:39:12,200
Speaker 4: pm PSD on YouTube, Facebook, and TikTok.

908
00:39:13,000 --> 00:39:18,960
Speaker 1: Just tap the and twitch. Don't forget there's it's over

909
00:39:19,040 --> 00:39:19,680
Speaker 1: there on Twitch.

910
00:39:20,280 --> 00:39:21,960
Speaker 4: But there is a little bit left to the story.

911
00:39:22,000 --> 00:39:22,800
Speaker 4: But do you have any thoughts?

912
00:39:22,960 --> 00:39:25,719
Speaker 1: I mean, you know, I kind of already said like

913
00:39:26,520 --> 00:39:30,160
Speaker 1: people can be really hesitant to cut off the relationships

914
00:39:30,560 --> 00:39:32,680
Speaker 1: when there it's like family or something. But it's like

915
00:39:33,120 --> 00:39:35,160
Speaker 1: these people are. I don't know, it just sounds like

916
00:39:35,200 --> 00:39:38,960
Speaker 1: you're your mom in particular, just like doesn't walks. It's

917
00:39:38,960 --> 00:39:40,879
Speaker 1: always a big red flag when people just like don't

918
00:39:40,920 --> 00:39:43,040
Speaker 1: let you have negative thoughts or opinions.

919
00:39:43,120 --> 00:39:45,720
Speaker 4: Yeah, like every negative thought and the appearance the feeling

920
00:39:45,880 --> 00:39:47,919
Speaker 4: is like immature. Someone said that right.

921
00:39:47,880 --> 00:39:50,440
Speaker 1: Here, Yeah, where It's like, yeah, it's it goes back

922
00:39:50,440 --> 00:39:52,360
Speaker 1: to you. It's like, actually, it's your fault for feeling

923
00:39:52,360 --> 00:39:52,640
Speaker 1: that way.

924
00:39:52,680 --> 00:39:55,719
Speaker 4: It's like is it though, like why did you what

925
00:39:55,760 --> 00:39:57,040
Speaker 4: did you do to cause that?

926
00:39:57,320 --> 00:40:00,759
Speaker 1: Yeah? But yeah, that's you know, I think we all

927
00:40:00,800 --> 00:40:02,120
Speaker 1: know who's in the right and who's in the wrong.

928
00:40:02,160 --> 00:40:05,600
Speaker 4: Inness I think we all know there's a little bit left. Well,

929
00:40:05,600 --> 00:40:07,680
Speaker 4: that's it for now. I hope my mom respects my

930
00:40:07,719 --> 00:40:10,280
Speaker 4: wish to go no contact and doesn't bother me anymore

931
00:40:10,320 --> 00:40:12,560
Speaker 4: after that. I'd also like to bring up the adoption

932
00:40:12,640 --> 00:40:16,240
Speaker 4: conversation with Leila after the holidays. She seemed really happy

933
00:40:16,239 --> 00:40:18,440
Speaker 4: when we first talked about it. That's lovely and also

934
00:40:18,480 --> 00:40:21,640
Speaker 4: that's like really it's nice because I mean, oh, he's

935
00:40:21,800 --> 00:40:24,920
Speaker 4: almost about to turn eighteen with his birthday, and so

936
00:40:25,000 --> 00:40:27,719
Speaker 4: the adoption is really just kind of this symbolic thing.

937
00:40:27,719 --> 00:40:30,000
Speaker 4: But it's really beautiful. It's like, you know, I want

938
00:40:30,040 --> 00:40:33,080
Speaker 4: you to be my mom. Nice little cherry. Thanks again

939
00:40:33,160 --> 00:40:36,000
Speaker 4: everyone for your kind words and advice. Your insights have

940
00:40:36,040 --> 00:40:38,640
Speaker 4: helped me better manage the situation. I can understand that

941
00:40:38,680 --> 00:40:40,799
Speaker 4: I'm still a little immature, but I feel that this

942
00:40:40,880 --> 00:40:43,560
Speaker 4: experience has helped me grow a little more and see

943
00:40:43,600 --> 00:40:46,000
Speaker 4: the issue from other points of view. All the best

944
00:40:46,080 --> 00:40:48,640
Speaker 4: for you, guys, And that is the end of that story.

945
00:40:48,680 --> 00:40:51,000
Speaker 1: Wow, no, gals at the end of that Oh no,

946
00:40:51,200 --> 00:40:54,040
Speaker 1: she's only wishing the best for guys. For the guys,

947
00:40:55,280 --> 00:40:59,480
Speaker 1: I refused to help my fiance with her daughter, and

948
00:40:59,520 --> 00:41:02,000
Speaker 1: now she spewing lies.

949
00:41:02,960 --> 00:41:04,600
Speaker 4: I get your spew out of here.

950
00:41:06,600 --> 00:41:12,040
Speaker 1: The earth is flat. I am a twenty seven year

951
00:41:12,080 --> 00:41:15,680
Speaker 1: old man and my fiance is thirty. We've been together

952
00:41:15,719 --> 00:41:18,160
Speaker 1: for nearly four years. I have a six year old

953
00:41:18,200 --> 00:41:20,880
Speaker 1: son and she has an eleven year old daughter. From

954
00:41:20,960 --> 00:41:24,840
Speaker 1: previous relationships up until now, we've never had any issues

955
00:41:24,880 --> 00:41:26,920
Speaker 1: regarding the children.

956
00:41:27,440 --> 00:41:27,960
Speaker 4: Children.

957
00:41:28,200 --> 00:41:31,359
Speaker 1: By the way, this comes from user embarrassed Basis one

958
00:41:31,960 --> 00:41:35,360
Speaker 1: one sixty on the a slash Okay Storytime subaddit. So,

959
00:41:35,719 --> 00:41:38,680
Speaker 1: yesterday her daughter was set to go on a camping

960
00:41:38,719 --> 00:41:41,600
Speaker 1: trip for a friend's birthday where they'd be doing activities

961
00:41:41,680 --> 00:41:46,000
Speaker 1: like kayaking. My fiance dressed her in the dress and

962
00:41:46,120 --> 00:41:48,120
Speaker 1: I mentioned to her that it didn't seem like the

963
00:41:48,200 --> 00:41:51,479
Speaker 1: right choice for the ecasion. She seemed offended and said

964
00:41:51,520 --> 00:41:54,359
Speaker 1: her daughter could wear whatever she liked and that it

965
00:41:54,440 --> 00:41:57,960
Speaker 1: wasn't a man's place to judge. I tried to clarify

966
00:41:58,080 --> 00:42:00,640
Speaker 1: what I meant, but she cut me off, saying she's

967
00:42:00,719 --> 00:42:01,920
Speaker 1: my daughter, not yours.

968
00:42:01,920 --> 00:42:02,640
Speaker 4: That's really annoying.

969
00:42:02,680 --> 00:42:04,840
Speaker 1: That is annoying, especially when you're like, yeah, did you

970
00:42:04,960 --> 00:42:07,839
Speaker 1: misread the kayaking No, it's like.

971
00:42:08,040 --> 00:42:10,719
Speaker 4: It seems like, oh, he wasn't being like you need

972
00:42:10,760 --> 00:42:13,680
Speaker 4: to tell your daughter to change. That is totally not Probably.

973
00:42:13,719 --> 00:42:15,239
Speaker 4: It was just like, hey, like, I don't know if

974
00:42:15,280 --> 00:42:17,440
Speaker 4: a dress is gonna be the best fit for kayaking.

975
00:42:17,560 --> 00:42:19,879
Speaker 1: I took my son to a pre planned match when

976
00:42:19,920 --> 00:42:22,920
Speaker 1: my fiance rang me. It turned out the birthday girl's

977
00:42:23,000 --> 00:42:25,440
Speaker 1: mom had told her daughter she couldn't go in a

978
00:42:25,520 --> 00:42:28,200
Speaker 1: dress and needed to wear a tracksuit or something similar,

979
00:42:28,239 --> 00:42:29,880
Speaker 1: so they didn't let her on the bus.

980
00:42:30,160 --> 00:42:31,600
Speaker 4: And that's what he warned them about.

981
00:42:31,719 --> 00:42:35,000
Speaker 1: Hey, look at that. The consequences of your action. It's like,

982
00:42:35,040 --> 00:42:39,240
Speaker 1: she wears flip flops to you know, flip flops to football.

983
00:42:39,120 --> 00:42:42,040
Speaker 4: Lab or okay, yeah that works, to a place where

984
00:42:42,040 --> 00:42:42,960
Speaker 4: you can't wear flipops.

985
00:42:43,160 --> 00:42:46,200
Speaker 1: My fiance then asked if I could leave the match

986
00:42:46,280 --> 00:42:49,680
Speaker 1: early to drive her daughter to the activity center. I replied,

987
00:42:49,880 --> 00:42:52,879
Speaker 1: why should I. She's not my daughter and I'm here

988
00:42:52,920 --> 00:42:56,080
Speaker 1: with my son. Neither of us are talking now. I

989
00:42:56,239 --> 00:43:00,719
Speaker 1: do pity for my stepdaughter, and I wasn't being spiteful

990
00:43:01,120 --> 00:43:03,120
Speaker 1: a little bit. My son was looking forward to it

991
00:43:03,160 --> 00:43:05,799
Speaker 1: and it would be about four hours of travel. Am

992
00:43:05,920 --> 00:43:06,799
Speaker 1: I the a whole?

993
00:43:06,960 --> 00:43:07,160
Speaker 4: Yeah?

994
00:43:07,200 --> 00:43:08,840
Speaker 1: You both are, Yeah, a little bit. Both are a

995
00:43:08,880 --> 00:43:11,440
Speaker 1: little bit, but yeah, you know, at the same time, it's.

996
00:43:11,320 --> 00:43:13,040
Speaker 4: Like it's anything that a conversation can fix.

997
00:43:13,160 --> 00:43:15,480
Speaker 1: I think your response is what made you the a hole,

998
00:43:15,600 --> 00:43:18,719
Speaker 1: not necessarily that you weren't able to do it. No, no, yeah,

999
00:43:18,840 --> 00:43:21,240
Speaker 1: that was the way that you said it that made

1000
00:43:21,239 --> 00:43:24,200
Speaker 1: you kind of a holy I agree, because you would

1001
00:43:24,200 --> 00:43:25,759
Speaker 1: also be an a hole if you just ditched your

1002
00:43:25,760 --> 00:43:27,320
Speaker 1: son at his own match.

1003
00:43:27,440 --> 00:43:30,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, like that that would Your action was not a

1004
00:43:30,080 --> 00:43:32,840
Speaker 4: whole ish, but your response.

1005
00:43:32,520 --> 00:43:33,879
Speaker 1: So we do have an edit. From what I get

1006
00:43:33,960 --> 00:43:35,239
Speaker 1: I was a bit of an a hole and she

1007
00:43:35,320 --> 00:43:36,879
Speaker 1: was a bigger a hole, So I'm going to try

1008
00:43:36,880 --> 00:43:38,480
Speaker 1: to talk it out and see what we both want.

1009
00:43:38,560 --> 00:43:41,680
Speaker 1: Relevant comments Reasonable Ruin thirty seven and sixty says, who

1010
00:43:41,719 --> 00:43:44,600
Speaker 1: sends a girl kayaking in a dress? Yeah?

1011
00:43:44,600 --> 00:43:46,400
Speaker 4: That was crazy? Yeah?

1012
00:43:46,560 --> 00:43:49,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, someone who's never been kayaking is who wears a

1013
00:43:49,560 --> 00:43:52,600
Speaker 1: dress to go kayaking? Prize Crow thirteen ninety six says

1014
00:43:52,640 --> 00:43:55,320
Speaker 1: I've never been kayaking either, but common sense still tells

1015
00:43:55,320 --> 00:43:57,799
Speaker 1: me that a child in a dress is wildly inappropriate

1016
00:43:57,800 --> 00:43:58,520
Speaker 1: for that activity.

1017
00:43:58,600 --> 00:44:02,239
Speaker 4: Yeah, and also they have like the things online presumably

1018
00:44:02,320 --> 00:44:04,239
Speaker 4: of like this is what you should wear to the

1019
00:44:04,320 --> 00:44:05,200
Speaker 4: kayaking thing.

1020
00:44:05,480 --> 00:44:09,280
Speaker 1: Frankie File says, you'd be amazed how scarce a resource

1021
00:44:09,280 --> 00:44:11,959
Speaker 1: common sense is. Mango Saint Jude says, not the a hole.

1022
00:44:12,000 --> 00:44:13,640
Speaker 1: You tried to help her and she told you to

1023
00:44:13,680 --> 00:44:17,279
Speaker 1: butt out. Make sure you get your apology. Ohp says yeah,

1024
00:44:17,400 --> 00:44:20,640
Speaker 1: i'd say I'll be waiting for an apology. Bella Zell says,

1025
00:44:20,800 --> 00:44:22,960
Speaker 1: dollars to donuts, you'll be waiting for a while. I'm

1026
00:44:22,960 --> 00:44:25,000
Speaker 1: gonna say this just in case while waiting to be

1027
00:44:25,040 --> 00:44:27,600
Speaker 1: sure to spend time with your stepdaughter, don't let her

1028
00:44:27,600 --> 00:44:29,600
Speaker 1: get caught in the middle between you and her mom.

1029
00:44:29,600 --> 00:44:32,239
Speaker 1: Butting heads regardless of who's the a hole. I mean,

1030
00:44:32,280 --> 00:44:34,960
Speaker 1: it's not you, but that's irrelevant. She doesn't need this crap. Well,

1031
00:44:34,960 --> 00:44:36,560
Speaker 1: I mean it's kind of I mean we I don't

1032
00:44:36,560 --> 00:44:38,160
Speaker 1: agree with that. I think it was both. But yeah

1033
00:44:38,200 --> 00:44:40,560
Speaker 1: the same time, yeah, oh, he says, Yeah, I'm taking

1034
00:44:40,560 --> 00:44:43,040
Speaker 1: her and my son to the camp next weekend instead.

1035
00:44:43,120 --> 00:44:45,799
Speaker 1: We won't do the camping part, but we'll do the activities. That's,

1036
00:44:45,840 --> 00:44:48,400
Speaker 1: of course, if I'm allowed to take her. A fiance

1037
00:44:48,680 --> 00:44:51,560
Speaker 1: is obviously invited to, but only if she wears a dress.

1038
00:44:51,760 --> 00:44:55,560
Speaker 1: I'm joking. Blooming As six oh seven says, it's clear

1039
00:44:55,560 --> 00:44:58,840
Speaker 1: your fiance misinterpreted your intentions. You weren't attacking her or

1040
00:44:58,880 --> 00:45:01,240
Speaker 1: her daughter. You just saw aical issue with the outfit.

1041
00:45:01,360 --> 00:45:03,719
Speaker 1: If she had addressed her daughter appropriately, if she had

1042
00:45:03,840 --> 00:45:06,520
Speaker 1: dressed her daughter appropriately in the first place, you wouldn't

1043
00:45:06,520 --> 00:45:09,360
Speaker 1: have needed to comment at all. But instead of recognizing that,

1044
00:45:09,400 --> 00:45:11,960
Speaker 1: she got defensive and made it about you, which just

1045
00:45:12,000 --> 00:45:14,759
Speaker 1: made things worse. If she'd taken a second to hear

1046
00:45:14,800 --> 00:45:18,160
Speaker 1: you out instead of taking offense, maybe the whole situation

1047
00:45:18,200 --> 00:45:20,439
Speaker 1: could have been avoided. Not the a hole. She can't

1048
00:45:20,480 --> 00:45:22,640
Speaker 1: be a snarky person. And still expect you to help.

1049
00:45:22,680 --> 00:45:25,480
Speaker 1: She made her choice and choices of consequences. The relationship

1050
00:45:25,520 --> 00:45:28,400
Speaker 1: isn't lasting much longer. Lol, and good.

1051
00:45:28,560 --> 00:45:30,840
Speaker 4: She sounds like a red flag, Opie says.

1052
00:45:31,040 --> 00:45:33,359
Speaker 1: Yeah, I didn't want to sound like a drama queen,

1053
00:45:33,440 --> 00:45:36,640
Speaker 1: but I'm very surprised what she said and questioning some stuff.

1054
00:45:36,719 --> 00:45:39,160
Speaker 1: I see my stepdaughter as my daughter and would have

1055
00:45:39,200 --> 00:45:41,520
Speaker 1: expected the same with her and my son. I'm not

1056
00:45:41,560 --> 00:45:43,799
Speaker 1: saying I don't have a favorite child, but I love

1057
00:45:43,840 --> 00:45:47,080
Speaker 1: them both. Judgment fiance is the bigger a hole, but

1058
00:45:47,600 --> 00:45:51,640
Speaker 1: oh Pie, still me there is an update. There is

1059
00:45:51,680 --> 00:45:53,800
Speaker 1: a little bit of stink. Yeah, but we got to

1060
00:45:53,880 --> 00:45:56,040
Speaker 1: update and let's see who gets the most stinking.

1061
00:45:56,600 --> 00:45:56,880
Speaker 4: Yes.

1062
00:45:57,960 --> 00:46:00,920
Speaker 1: I had a conversation with my fiance and she asked

1063
00:46:01,000 --> 00:46:04,239
Speaker 1: why I would say something so hurtful. I replied, I

1064
00:46:04,360 --> 00:46:07,400
Speaker 1: was just repeating what she had said to me earlier.

1065
00:46:08,560 --> 00:46:11,200
Speaker 1: Come on, red flag. There there it is again. Where

1066
00:46:11,239 --> 00:46:14,399
Speaker 1: are flags? There's grab those flags. Get the flags. We're

1067
00:46:14,400 --> 00:46:17,279
Speaker 1: getting more visual humor, get them, get them, get them

1068
00:46:17,719 --> 00:46:21,480
Speaker 1: waving the red flag, red flag. She then asked if

1069
00:46:21,520 --> 00:46:24,200
Speaker 1: I love her daughter, and I said I did. She

1070
00:46:24,360 --> 00:46:26,799
Speaker 1: asked if it was as much as I loved my son,

1071
00:46:26,960 --> 00:46:30,480
Speaker 1: and I responded almost as much. She got cranky. I

1072
00:46:30,560 --> 00:46:33,359
Speaker 1: asked her if she loved my son. She said no,

1073
00:46:33,800 --> 00:46:36,000
Speaker 1: what what?

1074
00:46:36,760 --> 00:46:37,040
Speaker 4: Wait?

1075
00:46:37,280 --> 00:46:37,360
Speaker 3: What?

1076
00:46:38,000 --> 00:46:40,880
Speaker 1: I asked her if she loved me, and her answer

1077
00:46:41,000 --> 00:46:46,959
Speaker 1: was sort of, I'm just going to keep this red

1078
00:46:47,000 --> 00:46:50,360
Speaker 1: flag in behind tucked behind my ear because this that

1079
00:46:50,600 --> 00:46:53,839
Speaker 1: is the biggest red fla flag. Crazy. Why don't care

1080
00:46:54,040 --> 00:46:56,920
Speaker 1: how upset you are? If you say that, you better

1081
00:46:56,960 --> 00:46:58,880
Speaker 1: be ready to never see that person.

1082
00:46:59,000 --> 00:47:02,200
Speaker 4: Sort of, Oh, I sort of want to break.

1083
00:47:02,000 --> 00:47:02,480
Speaker 1: Up with you.

1084
00:47:02,880 --> 00:47:03,279
Speaker 4: Come on.

1085
00:47:03,560 --> 00:47:06,640
Speaker 1: She started crying, woke up her daughter and told her

1086
00:47:06,680 --> 00:47:09,800
Speaker 1: they had to leave, even though I hadn't told them

1087
00:47:09,840 --> 00:47:12,400
Speaker 1: to go. Like, girly, you did that, dude.

1088
00:47:12,080 --> 00:47:18,120
Speaker 4: Why are you crying? She's like, no, I don't love you.

1089
00:47:18,200 --> 00:47:20,960
Speaker 4: Get up, Get up, daughter, getting natty.

1090
00:47:21,320 --> 00:47:24,440
Speaker 1: I love this man and I don't love and I

1091
00:47:24,480 --> 00:47:25,640
Speaker 1: don't love his child.

1092
00:47:25,719 --> 00:47:27,040
Speaker 4: Hey, his son. God.

1093
00:47:27,400 --> 00:47:29,960
Speaker 1: I said we could talk about it tomorrow, but she insisted,

1094
00:47:30,000 --> 00:47:32,840
Speaker 1: saying he doesn't want us anymore. I told her that

1095
00:47:33,040 --> 00:47:35,800
Speaker 1: I never said that. Her daughter began crying and didn't

1096
00:47:35,800 --> 00:47:37,840
Speaker 1: want to leave, but her mother said, don't let me

1097
00:47:38,120 --> 00:47:39,360
Speaker 1: leave on my own.

1098
00:47:39,760 --> 00:47:41,440
Speaker 4: Oh my god, where are they going?

1099
00:47:41,600 --> 00:47:43,960
Speaker 1: She's going through like a mental breakdown. She gotta be

1100
00:47:44,120 --> 00:47:46,360
Speaker 1: where are they even going? How do you say that

1101
00:47:46,400 --> 00:47:48,319
Speaker 1: to your own kid? First you tell you, tell him

1102
00:47:48,400 --> 00:47:50,600
Speaker 1: I don't love your son. I also barely even love you,

1103
00:47:50,680 --> 00:47:53,080
Speaker 1: and you're like daughter. If you don't come with me now,

1104
00:47:53,360 --> 00:47:56,120
Speaker 1: I will literally leave you here. He doesn't want you.

1105
00:47:56,440 --> 00:47:59,919
Speaker 1: I reassured them both that they were welcome to stay.

1106
00:48:00,120 --> 00:48:03,319
Speaker 1: My fiance decided to leave without her daughter, and now

1107
00:48:03,360 --> 00:48:06,600
Speaker 1: she's not answering. When I spoke to my daughter's father,

1108
00:48:06,880 --> 00:48:09,839
Speaker 1: he just laughed and said she couldn't even hold off

1109
00:48:09,880 --> 00:48:12,000
Speaker 1: on the crazy until after the wedding.

1110
00:48:12,239 --> 00:48:17,040
Speaker 4: Dang, oh, wow, dang, comment's crazy.

1111
00:48:17,520 --> 00:48:21,320
Speaker 1: Great crad, she do be fancy average fifty four to forty,

1112
00:48:21,560 --> 00:48:24,160
Speaker 1: That poor eleven year old girl. This won't be the

1113
00:48:24,280 --> 00:48:28,080
Speaker 1: last time she has her life uprooted by her unstable mother.

1114
00:48:28,239 --> 00:48:31,120
Speaker 1: Brief Candidate thirty nineteen sounds like you have a good

1115
00:48:31,160 --> 00:48:33,160
Speaker 1: relationship with her ex. Listen to him.

1116
00:48:33,440 --> 00:48:35,720
Speaker 4: Yeah, yes, op, yeah.

1117
00:48:35,760 --> 00:48:38,200
Speaker 1: Despite his lack of presence in his daughter's life, he's

1118
00:48:38,200 --> 00:48:40,800
Speaker 1: not a bad guy. Although perhaps my judge of character

1119
00:48:40,840 --> 00:48:43,279
Speaker 1: isn't the best. Wait before I get onto this next comment. Yeah,

1120
00:48:43,280 --> 00:48:45,239
Speaker 1: I think your judge of great character isn't the best

1121
00:48:45,280 --> 00:48:47,480
Speaker 1: because that didn't come off to me as he's actually

1122
00:48:47,480 --> 00:48:49,560
Speaker 1: a pretty good guy. He called you and laughed and

1123
00:48:49,680 --> 00:48:53,080
Speaker 1: was like, yeah, my ex wife's crazy. She couldn't even

1124
00:48:53,080 --> 00:48:54,640
Speaker 1: hold it in until after she married you.

1125
00:48:54,800 --> 00:48:57,920
Speaker 4: Stupid, We're we're getting too much, We're giving too much

1126
00:48:57,920 --> 00:48:58,799
Speaker 4: credit to the X.

1127
00:48:59,120 --> 00:49:01,279
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, that making fun of you. Yeah, he made

1128
00:49:01,280 --> 00:49:04,120
Speaker 1: fun of you and is also a deadbeat dad. No,

1129
00:49:04,360 --> 00:49:07,760
Speaker 1: he's not a good guy. Moving on, last Unicorn seventy

1130
00:49:07,800 --> 00:49:10,200
Speaker 1: six says she flat out told you she doesn't love

1131
00:49:10,239 --> 00:49:13,040
Speaker 1: your son and she sort of loves you. Wow, you

1132
00:49:13,080 --> 00:49:15,880
Speaker 1: avoided even more drama than was starting to brew. You

1133
00:49:15,960 --> 00:49:17,840
Speaker 1: and your boy deserve so much better than a no

1134
00:49:18,120 --> 00:49:20,000
Speaker 1: and a sort of OHP says my son is very

1135
00:49:20,080 --> 00:49:22,920
Speaker 1: upset by her going her daughter less. So apparently I

1136
00:49:22,960 --> 00:49:25,680
Speaker 1: don't toast pop tarts as well as she did, according

1137
00:49:25,680 --> 00:49:28,399
Speaker 1: to my son. Brew Dog Drinker, Bullet dodged. OHP says

1138
00:49:28,400 --> 00:49:30,719
Speaker 1: Bullet dodged until she remembers her daughter still living with me.

1139
00:49:30,800 --> 00:49:33,120
Speaker 1: One last visit of crazy, and when she decides to

1140
00:49:33,120 --> 00:49:35,239
Speaker 1: collect her, she has left her daughter there. Yeah, a

1141
00:49:35,239 --> 00:49:38,160
Speaker 1: better Fox says you aren't the daughter's legal guardian. You

1142
00:49:38,239 --> 00:49:41,680
Speaker 1: should contact authorities. If she's this manipulative, she's likely willing

1143
00:49:41,719 --> 00:49:44,400
Speaker 1: to build up a story of how you kept her daughter.

1144
00:49:44,520 --> 00:49:48,160
Speaker 1: I'd contact CPS or an attorney asap Op says, CPS

1145
00:49:48,239 --> 00:49:50,759
Speaker 1: has been contacted. He tried getting through to her and

1146
00:49:51,120 --> 00:49:53,840
Speaker 1: did not succeed. Her father gave permission for her to

1147
00:49:53,880 --> 00:49:57,000
Speaker 1: stay with me, as per CPS. Honestly not even thinking

1148
00:49:57,000 --> 00:49:59,520
Speaker 1: beyond tomorrow. At this stage, she's with me for the

1149
00:49:59,600 --> 00:50:02,839
Speaker 1: foresee future. I haven't really thought that far ahead. I'd

1150
00:50:02,840 --> 00:50:06,400
Speaker 1: imagine her mother will have every right when she returns, sadly,

1151
00:50:06,520 --> 00:50:09,400
Speaker 1: to take her back. Op On the dad, Yeah, despite

1152
00:50:09,400 --> 00:50:11,759
Speaker 1: his lack of presence in his daughter's life, he's not

1153
00:50:11,800 --> 00:50:14,279
Speaker 1: a bad guy, although perhaps my judge of character isn't

1154
00:50:14,280 --> 00:50:16,399
Speaker 1: the best, which you've already up very established. I would

1155
00:50:16,400 --> 00:50:19,880
Speaker 1: imagine the mother didn't help, but no, he runs from responsibility.

1156
00:50:20,719 --> 00:50:22,400
Speaker 1: One of the first times I met him, he was

1157
00:50:22,440 --> 00:50:24,839
Speaker 1: shocked I was a single dad. His wise words were

1158
00:50:24,840 --> 00:50:29,799
Speaker 1: adoption exists. Relation. Mammoth One says, you said she's much

1159
00:50:29,880 --> 00:50:32,120
Speaker 1: nicer in your og post, But it doesn't sound like

1160
00:50:32,200 --> 00:50:34,279
Speaker 1: it sounds like you've been putting up with crap and

1161
00:50:34,320 --> 00:50:37,799
Speaker 1: somehow making it work and maybe even being in denial.

1162
00:50:38,400 --> 00:50:40,919
Speaker 1: I just feel bad for the daughter. OHP says, maybe

1163
00:50:40,960 --> 00:50:43,120
Speaker 1: I was. I have a feeling she has a guy

1164
00:50:43,239 --> 00:50:46,920
Speaker 1: lined up and that's just how it switched so quickly.

1165
00:50:46,960 --> 00:50:51,319
Speaker 1: But who knows. They're having a PJ day today. She's

1166
00:50:51,400 --> 00:50:53,680
Speaker 1: definitely sad, but I'm sure there's more crap to file.

1167
00:50:53,800 --> 00:50:55,560
Speaker 1: Oh well, don't worry, PJ dal will turn it around.

1168
00:50:55,640 --> 00:50:58,080
Speaker 1: I always pajama Day at school was always so much fun.

1169
00:50:58,120 --> 00:50:58,920
Speaker 1: I liked PJ Day.

1170
00:50:59,040 --> 00:50:59,359
Speaker 4: I did.

1171
00:50:59,680 --> 00:51:02,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, anyway, Update number two I told my fiance my

1172
00:51:02,840 --> 00:51:06,480
Speaker 1: stepdaughter isn't mine, and I'm not sure if you've forgotten

1173
00:51:06,480 --> 00:51:08,440
Speaker 1: all about me, But I'll start with some good news.

1174
00:51:08,640 --> 00:51:11,440
Speaker 1: We finally figured out how to toast pop tarts properly

1175
00:51:11,480 --> 00:51:12,080
Speaker 1: for my son.

1176
00:51:12,320 --> 00:51:16,200
Speaker 4: Hey, it's just toasting them a little bit longer.

1177
00:51:16,600 --> 00:51:18,920
Speaker 1: I'm getting rid of the red flag because you know

1178
00:51:19,000 --> 00:51:22,000
Speaker 1: how to toast pop tarts. We had about two weeks of calm.

1179
00:51:22,239 --> 00:51:24,600
Speaker 1: During that time. I spoke to my stepdaughter a few

1180
00:51:24,680 --> 00:51:28,400
Speaker 1: times about everything. I reassured her that no matter what happens,

1181
00:51:28,440 --> 00:51:30,560
Speaker 1: she'll always be my girl. Get the green flag, Get

1182
00:51:30,600 --> 00:51:34,160
Speaker 1: the green flag. That's a green flag. That's a green flag.

1183
00:51:34,480 --> 00:51:37,239
Speaker 4: How sweet? Oh, yes, this is not Opie's child, and

1184
00:51:37,280 --> 00:51:41,960
Speaker 4: he is just like being so incredibly lovely and supportive

1185
00:51:42,040 --> 00:51:45,440
Speaker 4: of her when she's literally been abandoned by her mom. Indeed,

1186
00:51:45,520 --> 00:51:47,600
Speaker 4: and her dad also, her dad was like, yeah, you

1187
00:51:47,640 --> 00:51:49,000
Speaker 4: can just kind of take her. Why don't you?

1188
00:51:49,080 --> 00:51:50,880
Speaker 1: Why would you even take that one? You can just

1189
00:51:50,920 --> 00:51:53,360
Speaker 1: adopt somebody? Or was he was the dad trying to

1190
00:51:53,400 --> 00:51:55,240
Speaker 1: say that he can adopt his daughter.

1191
00:51:55,400 --> 00:51:56,839
Speaker 4: I have no idea I missed that is that?

1192
00:51:56,960 --> 00:51:58,560
Speaker 1: Is that what he was trying to say, which, again,

1193
00:51:58,960 --> 00:52:01,600
Speaker 1: what a deadbeat dad. He's like, yeah, I'm not doing

1194
00:52:01,640 --> 00:52:06,280
Speaker 1: anything with her. You can adopt her if you want, Okay.

1195
00:52:06,400 --> 00:52:08,719
Speaker 1: She told me she hoped her mom wouldn't come back.

1196
00:52:08,760 --> 00:52:11,399
Speaker 1: She says her mom was controlling. Then a few days ago,

1197
00:52:11,480 --> 00:52:16,480
Speaker 1: my ex fiance walked into my house carrying two grocery bags,

1198
00:52:16,920 --> 00:52:19,759
Speaker 1: acting as if nothing happened.

1199
00:52:19,880 --> 00:52:20,960
Speaker 4: He goes, hmmm.

1200
00:52:22,120 --> 00:52:24,799
Speaker 1: She asked me what I wanted for dinner. I told

1201
00:52:24,840 --> 00:52:27,560
Speaker 1: the kids to go to their rooms, and I confronted her.

1202
00:52:27,640 --> 00:52:30,560
Speaker 1: I told her that we're over. She asked why, and

1203
00:52:30,600 --> 00:52:33,359
Speaker 1: when I didn't respond, she said couples fight, as if

1204
00:52:33,360 --> 00:52:36,879
Speaker 1: her actions were normal. This behavior was unsettling. I told

1205
00:52:36,880 --> 00:52:39,120
Speaker 1: her she needed to leave or I'd call the police.

1206
00:52:39,320 --> 00:52:42,000
Speaker 1: She asked why I was doing this to her. I

1207
00:52:42,120 --> 00:52:44,120
Speaker 1: was at a loss for words, so I picked up

1208
00:52:44,120 --> 00:52:46,480
Speaker 1: my phone. At that point, she backed down, saying, Okay,

1209
00:52:46,719 --> 00:52:48,480
Speaker 1: let me get my daughter. I told her if that

1210
00:52:48,560 --> 00:52:51,279
Speaker 1: if she wanted her daughter, she needed to call CPS

1211
00:52:51,280 --> 00:52:53,920
Speaker 1: and explain why she had disappeared for two weeks. She

1212
00:52:54,000 --> 00:52:56,520
Speaker 1: insisted she had only been gone for one night.

1213
00:52:57,040 --> 00:52:59,000
Speaker 4: She having a breakdown.

1214
00:52:58,600 --> 00:53:03,200
Speaker 1: Actually, like straight up an episode like what she just

1215
00:53:03,960 --> 00:53:08,160
Speaker 1: There are certain like mental disorders where it's like you

1216
00:53:08,239 --> 00:53:11,839
Speaker 1: can actually blackout on days. Yeah, she might also have

1217
00:53:11,960 --> 00:53:13,520
Speaker 1: it could be a substance.

1218
00:53:13,120 --> 00:53:14,960
Speaker 4: Problem or like bipolar.

1219
00:53:15,120 --> 00:53:18,160
Speaker 1: Anyway, She refused to leave without her daughter and started

1220
00:53:18,160 --> 00:53:20,439
Speaker 1: shouting her name. Her daughter came out of her room

1221
00:53:20,440 --> 00:53:23,200
Speaker 1: and reluctantly said she would go with her. I told her,

1222
00:53:23,400 --> 00:53:25,479
Speaker 1: you have a place here for as long as you want.

1223
00:53:25,560 --> 00:53:27,640
Speaker 1: Her mother then said, he'll kick you out, just like

1224
00:53:27,719 --> 00:53:28,960
Speaker 1: he's kicking me out.

1225
00:53:29,080 --> 00:53:30,319
Speaker 4: You kicked herself out.

1226
00:53:30,480 --> 00:53:35,399
Speaker 1: She she literally literally left, you said you and then left. Yeah,

1227
00:53:35,400 --> 00:53:37,600
Speaker 1: I hate your son, I don't love you. And by

1228
00:53:37,640 --> 00:53:40,279
Speaker 1: the way, you're kicking me out, I'm leaving well. And

1229
00:53:40,800 --> 00:53:42,719
Speaker 1: the whole time he said no, you don't have to leave.

1230
00:53:42,800 --> 00:53:45,279
Speaker 1: I stood my ground saying she could have her daughter

1231
00:53:45,360 --> 00:53:48,600
Speaker 1: back after speaking to CPS. When I started dialing the police,

1232
00:53:48,719 --> 00:53:50,520
Speaker 1: she ran out. But you know what, I don't want

1233
00:53:50,520 --> 00:53:53,160
Speaker 1: you to ever run out on us. Every three pm

1234
00:53:53,560 --> 00:53:57,200
Speaker 1: on the weekdays, you can tune in to our live

1235
00:53:57,280 --> 00:54:00,480
Speaker 1: streams on YouTube, Facebook, TikTok, and Twitter, which all you

1236
00:54:00,520 --> 00:54:04,480
Speaker 1: gotta do is tabl profile and you're in.

1237
00:54:04,840 --> 00:54:05,720
Speaker 4: You're literally in.

1238
00:54:05,920 --> 00:54:07,920
Speaker 1: But don't go anywhere yet. You could go ahead and

1239
00:54:08,000 --> 00:54:09,759
Speaker 1: check if we're live right now, but but don't go

1240
00:54:09,800 --> 00:54:12,080
Speaker 1: anywhere because we've got thoughts.

1241
00:54:12,360 --> 00:54:16,080
Speaker 4: Oh boy, do I have thoughts. Yeah. I think either

1242
00:54:16,200 --> 00:54:19,080
Speaker 4: it's some sort of mental health thing or a substance

1243
00:54:19,160 --> 00:54:22,360
Speaker 4: substance thing, but she's definitely having some sort of breakdown

1244
00:54:22,520 --> 00:54:26,320
Speaker 4: or episode. And I think it's definitely a good idea

1245
00:54:26,400 --> 00:54:28,319
Speaker 4: to be like, you know what, you can call CPS

1246
00:54:28,360 --> 00:54:31,000
Speaker 4: to get your kid back, And it's such an angel

1247
00:54:31,120 --> 00:54:32,719
Speaker 4: move for you to be like, you know what, this

1248
00:54:32,840 --> 00:54:35,080
Speaker 4: is not my daughter, but this is like a child

1249
00:54:35,160 --> 00:54:37,200
Speaker 4: that I care a lot about, and I'm not going

1250
00:54:37,239 --> 00:54:39,880
Speaker 4: to just you know, not care about what happens to her.

1251
00:54:39,920 --> 00:54:41,920
Speaker 4: I'm going to make sure that she's safe. Yeah, that's

1252
00:54:42,040 --> 00:54:43,279
Speaker 4: really really stand up guy.

1253
00:54:43,320 --> 00:54:45,440
Speaker 1: Move. Yeah. And this proves also that that thing that

1254
00:54:45,480 --> 00:54:47,120
Speaker 1: he said at the beginning of the story when he

1255
00:54:47,160 --> 00:54:49,799
Speaker 1: was on the phone with his now ex fiance, when

1256
00:54:49,800 --> 00:54:52,239
Speaker 1: he was like, it's not even my daughter, it's like

1257
00:54:52,320 --> 00:54:55,680
Speaker 1: that was just he was just saying that to get

1258
00:54:55,520 --> 00:54:56,719
Speaker 1: He didn't feel that at all.

1259
00:54:56,760 --> 00:54:58,239
Speaker 4: He was just saying that to get it the ex

1260
00:54:58,320 --> 00:55:01,560
Speaker 4: wife dex fiance, which is lovely to see.

1261
00:55:01,680 --> 00:55:05,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, Opie's just sweetie, and he's maybe too sweet for

1262
00:55:05,560 --> 00:55:07,239
Speaker 1: his own good because he's talking about how the ex

1263
00:55:07,320 --> 00:55:09,200
Speaker 1: husband is also like a good guy, which he's.

1264
00:55:09,120 --> 00:55:10,719
Speaker 4: Clearly not not a good guy.

1265
00:55:10,840 --> 00:55:13,600
Speaker 1: So, op, I think you need to work on being

1266
00:55:13,640 --> 00:55:16,759
Speaker 1: able to see people's negative traits for what they are

1267
00:55:17,200 --> 00:55:20,120
Speaker 1: instead of sort of I guess, brushing them aside.

1268
00:55:20,320 --> 00:55:20,520
Speaker 4: Yep.

1269
00:55:20,600 --> 00:55:23,520
Speaker 1: Anyway, later I talked to my stepdaughter. She said she

1270
00:55:23,600 --> 00:55:25,680
Speaker 1: was willing to leave because she didn't want to cause

1271
00:55:25,680 --> 00:55:27,919
Speaker 1: trouble for me. I reminded her that she's the child

1272
00:55:27,960 --> 00:55:30,319
Speaker 1: and I'm the adult, and it's my responsibility to look

1273
00:55:30,400 --> 00:55:32,719
Speaker 1: after her, not the other way around. I asked her

1274
00:55:32,760 --> 00:55:34,680
Speaker 1: where she wanted to stay for now, and she said

1275
00:55:34,680 --> 00:55:38,960
Speaker 1: she'd rather stay here. My ex fiance ended up calling CPS.

1276
00:55:39,239 --> 00:55:41,120
Speaker 1: They reached out to me and they were supposed to

1277
00:55:41,160 --> 00:55:43,760
Speaker 1: have a meeting yesterday with my fiance, but she didn't

1278
00:55:43,800 --> 00:55:44,400
Speaker 1: show up to it.

1279
00:55:44,480 --> 00:55:48,000
Speaker 4: Apparently she's not What is she doing? Yeah, she's got

1280
00:55:48,160 --> 00:55:50,200
Speaker 4: I mean good for the little girl, because I wouldn't

1281
00:55:50,200 --> 00:55:52,320
Speaker 4: want her to be with this person when she's clearly

1282
00:55:52,360 --> 00:55:53,560
Speaker 4: having some sort of breakdown.

1283
00:55:53,600 --> 00:55:56,760
Speaker 1: But I don't know. You do have some comments. Maintenance

1284
00:55:56,800 --> 00:55:59,879
Speaker 1: Short forty eight twenty one says, quite right, she wants

1285
00:55:59,880 --> 00:56:02,360
Speaker 1: her her daughter so badly with her that she missed

1286
00:56:02,440 --> 00:56:05,840
Speaker 1: a CPS meeting. Hope your stepdaughter can stay with you.

1287
00:56:06,080 --> 00:56:10,040
Speaker 1: Dark Star nine says doesn't. This reflects badly on her

1288
00:56:10,080 --> 00:56:12,600
Speaker 1: for further dealings like teeming her an unfit parent and

1289
00:56:12,640 --> 00:56:16,160
Speaker 1: taking custody of her daughter. Yeah, OP is her fiance.

1290
00:56:16,280 --> 00:56:18,480
Speaker 1: If custody has given, it would be to next of kin,

1291
00:56:18,640 --> 00:56:22,680
Speaker 1: the step daughter's father, unless he feels like his daughter

1292
00:56:23,000 --> 00:56:25,839
Speaker 1: is much safer with you and happier than with him

1293
00:56:25,920 --> 00:56:28,160
Speaker 1: than OP can fight for the custody. I'm not sure

1294
00:56:28,200 --> 00:56:30,600
Speaker 1: the legalities of custody matters. Yeah, it's like and the

1295
00:56:30,600 --> 00:56:32,360
Speaker 1: the actual dad doesn't even care.

1296
00:56:32,360 --> 00:56:33,920
Speaker 4: Doesn't even care. It's not even trying.

1297
00:56:33,800 --> 00:56:36,160
Speaker 1: Comments kind of reaffirming that it doesn't always have to

1298
00:56:36,160 --> 00:56:39,799
Speaker 1: be next of kin that story. Yeah, so, yes, that

1299
00:56:40,080 --> 00:56:42,720
Speaker 1: is the end of that story. Yeah.

1300
00:56:43,440 --> 00:56:45,680
Speaker 4: No, I think it's really really great that you stepped up, Opie.

1301
00:56:45,800 --> 00:56:48,600
Speaker 1: No, I did the did the right move. I'm glad

1302
00:56:48,600 --> 00:56:52,920
Speaker 1: that I'm glad that she's not there destabilizing her child anymore,

1303
00:56:53,080 --> 00:56:56,439
Speaker 1: or or being a negative influence on your son, who

1304
00:56:56,480 --> 00:56:58,520
Speaker 1: she said she literally doesn't even have any love for

1305
00:56:58,880 --> 00:57:01,920
Speaker 1: in the first place. So, yeah, you don't want to

1306
00:57:01,960 --> 00:57:04,560
Speaker 1: get married to somebody who doesn't love your child.

1307
00:57:04,520 --> 00:57:07,560
Speaker 4: No, you, that's a prerequisite.

1308
00:57:07,719 --> 00:57:09,399
Speaker 1: Hey, it's John here, og host of the show. We're

1309
00:57:09,400 --> 00:57:11,040
Speaker 1: gonna get back to these juicy stories. But here's a

1310
00:57:11,080 --> 00:57:12,879
Speaker 1: quick three minutes of ads from our sponsors.

1311
00:57:13,440 --> 00:57:17,320
Speaker 4: My adopted mother abandoned me after my adopted dad passed,

1312
00:57:17,440 --> 00:57:18,800
Speaker 4: but she always hated me.

1313
00:57:19,080 --> 00:57:21,680
Speaker 1: Wow. Well, I mean, hey, it sounds like you might

1314
00:57:21,720 --> 00:57:24,000
Speaker 1: be better off without the woman that hates you.

1315
00:57:24,160 --> 00:57:27,040
Speaker 4: I twenty six female, was adopted at an early age,

1316
00:57:27,120 --> 00:57:30,680
Speaker 4: along with a handful of my other siblings. My parents

1317
00:57:30,720 --> 00:57:34,280
Speaker 4: only had two biological sons and adopted the rest of us.

1318
00:57:34,360 --> 00:57:36,520
Speaker 4: By the way, this comes from a Dame Violet on

1319
00:57:36,560 --> 00:57:39,280
Speaker 4: the okay storytime separate it. So even early on, my

1320
00:57:39,360 --> 00:57:41,800
Speaker 4: sisters and I could tell the huge difference between our

1321
00:57:41,840 --> 00:57:44,640
Speaker 4: treatment from our mother and the treatment she gave her sons,

1322
00:57:44,800 --> 00:57:48,120
Speaker 4: biological and non biological. Because of this treatment, I have

1323
00:57:48,240 --> 00:57:50,640
Speaker 4: always been closer to my dad. He didn't yell and

1324
00:57:50,680 --> 00:57:53,640
Speaker 4: tear us down. You showed us love and not bitterness.

1325
00:57:53,760 --> 00:57:56,000
Speaker 4: Over the years, my dad grew ill and my mother

1326
00:57:56,040 --> 00:57:59,080
Speaker 4: would always make these comments like God forbid something happens

1327
00:57:59,080 --> 00:58:02,040
Speaker 4: to him getting remarried. I've never just had my life

1328
00:58:02,040 --> 00:58:05,000
Speaker 4: to myself. I married too young. Pretty much. The source

1329
00:58:05,000 --> 00:58:07,200
Speaker 4: of the bitterness would come out when she talked like that.

1330
00:58:07,240 --> 00:58:10,520
Speaker 4: When my dad was diagnosed with congested heart failure ooh

1331
00:58:10,760 --> 00:58:13,480
Speaker 4: in twenty eighteen, I knew I only had a number

1332
00:58:13,520 --> 00:58:15,960
Speaker 4: of years with him, although I am one of the youngest,

1333
00:58:16,000 --> 00:58:18,720
Speaker 4: and I stayed the furthest away between forty eight hours.

1334
00:58:18,880 --> 00:58:21,600
Speaker 4: I made it a point to focus on positive memories

1335
00:58:21,640 --> 00:58:23,800
Speaker 4: with him and my mother, coming home on the weekends,

1336
00:58:24,000 --> 00:58:26,840
Speaker 4: taking time off work to plan trips for us to take,

1337
00:58:26,920 --> 00:58:30,120
Speaker 4: getting us all tickets to ballgames, just as having fun.

1338
00:58:30,240 --> 00:58:32,520
Speaker 4: There were times I would disagree with my dad because

1339
00:58:32,560 --> 00:58:35,240
Speaker 4: he was an older male with boomer tendencies, but at

1340
00:58:35,240 --> 00:58:38,240
Speaker 4: the end of the day, petty disagreements wouldn't matter to me.

1341
00:58:38,320 --> 00:58:40,320
Speaker 4: When my husband and I would come home and take

1342
00:58:40,320 --> 00:58:42,760
Speaker 4: my parents to Top Golfer to dinner, it was always

1343
00:58:42,760 --> 00:58:45,200
Speaker 4: my mother saying I shouldn't be doing this, and would

1344
00:58:45,200 --> 00:58:48,160
Speaker 4: say because I shouldn't strain myself or put ourselves in

1345
00:58:48,200 --> 00:58:51,360
Speaker 4: a difficult financial position. My husband and I never did,

1346
00:58:51,400 --> 00:58:53,920
Speaker 4: and to us, family is super important, and it was

1347
00:58:53,960 --> 00:58:56,600
Speaker 4: always easy to take the family to the aquarium because

1348
00:58:56,600 --> 00:58:59,080
Speaker 4: we knew they'd have fun. But she would always push

1349
00:58:59,160 --> 00:59:01,520
Speaker 4: back on me spending money on them, and it would

1350
00:59:01,520 --> 00:59:04,560
Speaker 4: seem she would have to force herself to enjoy it. However,

1351
00:59:04,600 --> 00:59:06,960
Speaker 4: if one of her sons were possessed enough to come

1352
00:59:06,960 --> 00:59:09,240
Speaker 4: home and do something for them, she'd have to brag

1353
00:59:09,360 --> 00:59:12,360
Speaker 4: to the whole town how great her kids were. Double standard.

1354
00:59:12,600 --> 00:59:14,680
Speaker 4: In October of twenty twenty three, I told Dad I

1355
00:59:14,760 --> 00:59:16,800
Speaker 4: was going to get us, me and Hobby, Dad and

1356
00:59:16,840 --> 00:59:20,240
Speaker 4: Mom tickets for the Georgia Florida game for his sixtieth birthday,

1357
00:59:20,280 --> 00:59:22,560
Speaker 4: the largest cocktail party of the year. I think it's

1358
00:59:22,560 --> 00:59:26,600
Speaker 4: called he got so excited major George fan, that is

1359
00:59:26,600 --> 00:59:27,560
Speaker 4: is GA Georgia.

1360
00:59:27,360 --> 00:59:30,160
Speaker 1: Is that something else, no GA's joj I wasn't sure

1361
00:59:30,160 --> 00:59:32,120
Speaker 1: if it was like a team name Gay's joud.

1362
00:59:32,640 --> 00:59:36,040
Speaker 4: He literally screamed with joy. It was a great sight

1363
00:59:36,160 --> 00:59:38,280
Speaker 4: to see. It's it's weird, I think, to have like

1364
00:59:38,320 --> 00:59:41,480
Speaker 4: a partner who's soves so differently around like the kids

1365
00:59:41,640 --> 00:59:43,959
Speaker 4: and someone who you know, like you have Op who's

1366
00:59:44,040 --> 00:59:46,720
Speaker 4: super close to her dad, who seems like a great person,

1367
00:59:46,760 --> 00:59:49,320
Speaker 4: and then the mom who's just seems pretty not great.

1368
00:59:49,640 --> 00:59:51,360
Speaker 4: It's like, how do you as a partner not like

1369
00:59:51,520 --> 00:59:52,240
Speaker 4: check your yeah?

1370
00:59:52,240 --> 00:59:54,040
Speaker 1: How do you how do you not feel that vibe

1371
00:59:54,080 --> 00:59:55,040
Speaker 1: being inay?

1372
00:59:55,120 --> 00:59:55,720
Speaker 4: What are you doing?

1373
00:59:55,800 --> 00:59:56,040
Speaker 1: You know?

1374
00:59:56,360 --> 00:59:59,560
Speaker 4: Then my mother sunk her teeth into him when we

1375
00:59:59,560 --> 01:00:02,600
Speaker 4: weren't around, and somehow took all the fun out of it,

1376
01:00:02,800 --> 01:00:04,640
Speaker 4: telling him it would be too much of a financial

1377
01:00:04,640 --> 01:00:07,480
Speaker 4: burden on me and my husband's shut up, this was false.

1378
01:00:07,600 --> 01:00:09,439
Speaker 4: And then my dad calls a day or two later,

1379
01:00:09,520 --> 01:00:11,760
Speaker 4: and I could hear the sadness in his voice saying

1380
01:00:11,800 --> 01:00:14,240
Speaker 4: we should not buy the tickets and please don't buy

1381
01:00:14,280 --> 01:00:16,560
Speaker 4: the tickets and he would just prefer to watch on TV.

1382
01:00:16,680 --> 01:00:19,320
Speaker 4: And I told him it was genuinely no problem. Then

1383
01:00:19,360 --> 01:00:21,160
Speaker 4: he told me that my mother had talked to him,

1384
01:00:21,160 --> 01:00:23,320
Speaker 4: and she was making sense that it's too much to

1385
01:00:23,360 --> 01:00:26,720
Speaker 4: spend on tickets. I was devastated that she did that,

1386
01:00:27,160 --> 01:00:30,160
Speaker 4: not speaking with me, and just took experiences. I wanted

1387
01:00:30,160 --> 01:00:33,120
Speaker 4: my dad to have away. Two months later he passed

1388
01:00:33,120 --> 01:00:37,240
Speaker 4: away up. Dude, that's so sad, dude. I went to

1389
01:00:37,280 --> 01:00:38,880
Speaker 4: the house to help out my mother for the next

1390
01:00:38,920 --> 01:00:41,479
Speaker 4: couple weeks. The treatment of the daughters were the same.

1391
01:00:41,680 --> 01:00:44,440
Speaker 4: We could tell we were not wanted around, and because

1392
01:00:44,480 --> 01:00:46,919
Speaker 4: she has always treated the boys with tender love and care,

1393
01:00:47,160 --> 01:00:49,840
Speaker 4: they never understood why our relationship with mother is much

1394
01:00:49,880 --> 01:00:51,920
Speaker 4: different from theirs. Just seems like a lot of like

1395
01:00:51,960 --> 01:00:56,320
Speaker 4: internalized misogyny against these daughters. I think shortly after the funeral,

1396
01:00:56,440 --> 01:00:59,240
Speaker 4: she stopped talking to me. Even told the other siblings

1397
01:00:59,240 --> 01:01:02,080
Speaker 4: that I was angry with her and not talking to her. Lies.

1398
01:01:02,400 --> 01:01:05,720
Speaker 4: Although our relationship was me always seeking validation from her

1399
01:01:05,800 --> 01:01:08,880
Speaker 4: and only getting disappointment from her, I still valued family

1400
01:01:08,920 --> 01:01:11,560
Speaker 4: and tried to keep it close. I had been messaging

1401
01:01:11,560 --> 01:01:13,400
Speaker 4: her for over a month and a half to no

1402
01:01:13,640 --> 01:01:16,400
Speaker 4: response from her. I had been planning a vow renewal

1403
01:01:16,440 --> 01:01:18,960
Speaker 4: with my husband, and because she has not been responding

1404
01:01:19,000 --> 01:01:21,919
Speaker 4: to me, I sent her a message, not expecting one back,

1405
01:01:22,040 --> 01:01:23,600
Speaker 4: asking if she would like to be put on the

1406
01:01:23,640 --> 01:01:26,360
Speaker 4: guest list. She replied back saying she didn't need to

1407
01:01:26,400 --> 01:01:28,720
Speaker 4: be on the guest list. I replied saying, if she

1408
01:01:28,840 --> 01:01:31,440
Speaker 4: changes her mind, she will have a spot on the list.

1409
01:01:31,560 --> 01:01:33,320
Speaker 4: She goes to tell her sons that I didn't want

1410
01:01:33,360 --> 01:01:35,120
Speaker 4: to invite her, and she also said no to me

1411
01:01:35,240 --> 01:01:38,200
Speaker 4: for me, oh low to bs. She just keeps lying.

1412
01:01:38,400 --> 01:01:42,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, it just lies upon lies upon lies lies.

1413
01:01:42,200 --> 01:01:45,000
Speaker 4: The distress of that situation contributed to one of the

1414
01:01:45,040 --> 01:01:47,880
Speaker 4: worst asthma attacks I've had in my life just a

1415
01:01:47,920 --> 01:01:48,800
Speaker 4: couple of days later.

1416
01:01:49,000 --> 01:01:51,240
Speaker 1: Is that can asthma can just be caused by distress?

1417
01:01:51,320 --> 01:01:51,600
Speaker 4: I thought.

1418
01:01:51,720 --> 01:01:53,600
Speaker 1: I thought it was like if something like got in

1419
01:01:53,640 --> 01:01:55,440
Speaker 1: there and like started irritating.

1420
01:01:55,640 --> 01:01:59,880
Speaker 4: I guess so, yes, I had no idea. My lungs collapsed.

1421
01:02:00,000 --> 01:02:01,439
Speaker 4: Oh my god. Well, and I had to be put

1422
01:02:01,440 --> 01:02:03,960
Speaker 4: on a ventilater for a week. I didn't receive a

1423
01:02:04,040 --> 01:02:07,120
Speaker 4: single call or text from her. April ninth, twenty twenty

1424
01:02:07,120 --> 01:02:09,240
Speaker 4: four was the day I was supposed to pass away

1425
01:02:09,520 --> 01:02:12,800
Speaker 4: according to the doctor. Wow, and your mom's not even there.

1426
01:02:12,880 --> 01:02:14,800
Speaker 1: I was going to say, yeah, this, it's very clear

1427
01:02:14,800 --> 01:02:17,800
Speaker 1: that this this woman has very little to know love

1428
01:02:17,840 --> 01:02:18,080
Speaker 1: for you.

1429
01:02:18,360 --> 01:02:20,520
Speaker 4: Yeah, like yeah, which is so sad, Like I can't

1430
01:02:20,560 --> 01:02:23,680
Speaker 4: imagine having a partner who's so in love with these

1431
01:02:23,800 --> 01:02:26,520
Speaker 4: kids and yeah, and the other partner is just so not.

1432
01:02:26,600 --> 01:02:28,600
Speaker 1: I mean, I guess it's like ying and yang, right,

1433
01:02:28,840 --> 01:02:31,280
Speaker 1: is that? How that that's don't do that, though, don't

1434
01:02:31,320 --> 01:02:31,840
Speaker 1: don't do that.

1435
01:02:32,040 --> 01:02:36,240
Speaker 4: Don't The entire family extended included new of my situation,

1436
01:02:36,480 --> 01:02:39,000
Speaker 4: and my husband got calls and texts from cousins, aunts,

1437
01:02:39,040 --> 01:02:42,040
Speaker 4: et cetera. My eldest brother or mother didn't bother. I

1438
01:02:42,080 --> 01:02:44,840
Speaker 4: couldn't believe, even on my deathbed, I did not matter

1439
01:02:44,960 --> 01:02:47,600
Speaker 4: enough to her. But you guys matter to us, and

1440
01:02:47,680 --> 01:02:49,680
Speaker 4: we want you to join us live every weekday three

1441
01:02:49,720 --> 01:02:53,400
Speaker 4: pmpst on YouTube, Facebook and TikTok and Twitch. Just top

1442
01:02:53,440 --> 01:02:56,080
Speaker 4: her profile and there is a little bit left just

1443
01:02:56,120 --> 01:02:57,960
Speaker 4: to TEENCB left meats lived.

1444
01:02:58,080 --> 01:03:01,560
Speaker 1: So I'm not I'll just say, like, I don't know

1445
01:03:01,600 --> 01:03:03,680
Speaker 1: what I would want to hear in this situation, Like

1446
01:03:03,880 --> 01:03:07,400
Speaker 1: it's got to be hard being left on your leaving

1447
01:03:07,440 --> 01:03:12,520
Speaker 1: this earthly plane bed and you make it. But it's

1448
01:03:12,560 --> 01:03:15,400
Speaker 1: like somebody who you I guess part of you had

1449
01:03:15,400 --> 01:03:17,520
Speaker 1: to assume like Okay, well, she's got to like me

1450
01:03:17,560 --> 01:03:19,000
Speaker 1: at least a little bit, but it's like she didn't

1451
01:03:19,000 --> 01:03:22,600
Speaker 1: even come. You can there's I feel like there's You

1452
01:03:22,600 --> 01:03:24,880
Speaker 1: can either like that's either gonna tear you down or

1453
01:03:24,920 --> 01:03:27,120
Speaker 1: you can allow it to be like fuel to build

1454
01:03:27,160 --> 01:03:28,760
Speaker 1: you up into like, you know.

1455
01:03:28,640 --> 01:03:30,320
Speaker 4: Focus on the people in your life that do care

1456
01:03:30,360 --> 01:03:33,720
Speaker 4: about you, like your partner exactly, and your other family members.

1457
01:03:33,960 --> 01:03:38,840
Speaker 1: Don't need on this woman in your life, and her

1458
01:03:39,000 --> 01:03:42,440
Speaker 1: presence or a lack thereof, has no bearing on your

1459
01:03:42,600 --> 01:03:46,280
Speaker 1: worth or value as a person or your you know, uh,

1460
01:03:46,560 --> 01:03:51,200
Speaker 1: because people just get mixed up. Parental figures get so messy. Yeah,

1461
01:03:51,600 --> 01:03:54,160
Speaker 1: in our in our brains and in our hearts. But

1462
01:03:54,240 --> 01:03:57,840
Speaker 1: it's like this person doesn't sound like in her heart

1463
01:03:57,920 --> 01:04:00,640
Speaker 1: she was ever really apparent to you. So best to

1464
01:04:00,800 --> 01:04:03,880
Speaker 1: just leave that in the past and onwards.

1465
01:04:03,440 --> 01:04:05,640
Speaker 4: And upwards, onwards and upwards. But there is a little

1466
01:04:05,680 --> 01:04:07,960
Speaker 4: bit left to the story. I usually keep to myself

1467
01:04:08,000 --> 01:04:10,800
Speaker 4: and never voice my opinion to family to avoid friction,

1468
01:04:11,120 --> 01:04:13,720
Speaker 4: but I had just survived something I wasn't supposed to.

1469
01:04:14,360 --> 01:04:16,720
Speaker 4: My eldest brother, thirty one male, said, I hurt his

1470
01:04:16,840 --> 01:04:19,560
Speaker 4: feelings for calling him out like that. Who cares?

1471
01:04:19,760 --> 01:04:20,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, who cares.

1472
01:04:20,680 --> 01:04:22,640
Speaker 4: And he was upset because it took my husband two

1473
01:04:22,720 --> 01:04:24,880
Speaker 4: days to tell them about my condition, and he knew

1474
01:04:24,920 --> 01:04:26,880
Speaker 4: I was going to be okay, and that is why

1475
01:04:26,880 --> 01:04:29,800
Speaker 4: he didn't call her text ridiculous And I need to

1476
01:04:29,840 --> 01:04:33,040
Speaker 4: get over myself and stop ignoring mom. Wow, hope, he

1477
01:04:33,120 --> 01:04:36,720
Speaker 4: literally just almost passed away and you're still acting like this. Yeah,

1478
01:04:36,720 --> 01:04:38,800
Speaker 4: so you can throw this person out as well. Yeah,

1479
01:04:38,880 --> 01:04:40,840
Speaker 4: I was baffled. I really just want to say ef

1480
01:04:40,960 --> 01:04:42,840
Speaker 4: it to the whole lot of them. I texted my

1481
01:04:42,880 --> 01:04:45,080
Speaker 4: mom the day I was discharged, and it's been a month,

1482
01:04:45,400 --> 01:04:48,040
Speaker 4: and it's it's been a month and still no response.

1483
01:04:48,240 --> 01:04:50,640
Speaker 4: I suppose I should get out of denial and understand

1484
01:04:50,720 --> 01:04:52,840
Speaker 4: she doesn't want me in her life and she doesn't

1485
01:04:52,880 --> 01:04:54,840
Speaker 4: deserve to the thing is that she doesn't deserve to

1486
01:04:54,840 --> 01:04:55,280
Speaker 4: be in your life.

1487
01:04:55,320 --> 01:04:59,000
Speaker 1: Ooh, she does not deserve you. This is not anything.

1488
01:04:59,160 --> 01:05:02,040
Speaker 1: You are not the wrong piece of the puzzle here.

1489
01:05:02,400 --> 01:05:06,840
Speaker 1: She is a giant, stinky garbage bag of a person

1490
01:05:06,920 --> 01:05:11,800
Speaker 1: who honestly black hole. Yeah, black hole for this person.

1491
01:05:11,880 --> 01:05:14,080
Speaker 4: Literally, just don't ignore her.

1492
01:05:14,200 --> 01:05:17,720
Speaker 1: M Yeah, I mean she and if she comes crawling back,

1493
01:05:17,760 --> 01:05:21,640
Speaker 1: which people like this probably will, as she'll need something

1494
01:05:21,680 --> 01:05:23,120
Speaker 1: and she'll feel like she might be able to get

1495
01:05:23,120 --> 01:05:26,880
Speaker 1: it from you. Don't even respond. There's no point. She

1496
01:05:27,080 --> 01:05:29,560
Speaker 1: is not And you know what, You can go out

1497
01:05:29,560 --> 01:05:33,440
Speaker 1: and find a family of your choice that's called our friends.

1498
01:05:34,240 --> 01:05:37,360
Speaker 1: You know your husband, and you can find there's also mentors,

1499
01:05:37,360 --> 01:05:39,520
Speaker 1: and yeah, your husband and your husband's family.

1500
01:05:39,760 --> 01:05:41,560
Speaker 4: You know lots of other people in your life who

1501
01:05:41,600 --> 01:05:44,160
Speaker 4: care about you. Yeah, but that is the end of

1502
01:05:44,200 --> 01:05:44,800
Speaker 4: that story.