1 00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:03,000 Speaker 1: I think we've got an attitude problem. It's one more thing. 2 00:00:04,400 --> 00:00:12,200 Speaker 2: I'm strong and getty. One more thing. Shut up. I 3 00:00:12,240 --> 00:00:13,440 Speaker 2: hate you, I hate everything. 4 00:00:13,920 --> 00:00:17,560 Speaker 1: So Reddit has been around for a while. I don't 5 00:00:17,560 --> 00:00:19,200 Speaker 1: know when it started, but it certainly was around in 6 00:00:19,200 --> 00:00:23,040 Speaker 1: twenty ten. And this is a big a research piece 7 00:00:23,079 --> 00:00:26,439 Speaker 1: they did on Reddit responses to a particular question, people 8 00:00:26,440 --> 00:00:28,160 Speaker 1: that are in unhappy marriages. 9 00:00:29,440 --> 00:00:31,760 Speaker 2: There's lots and lots of Reddit threads around this sort 10 00:00:31,760 --> 00:00:32,159 Speaker 2: of stuff. 11 00:00:32,840 --> 00:00:38,360 Speaker 1: Anyway, they filtered out relationship advice from one point two 12 00:00:38,760 --> 00:00:43,640 Speaker 1: million comments over the years since twenty ten to twenty 13 00:00:43,680 --> 00:00:46,720 Speaker 1: twenty five, So over fifteen years, one point two million comments. 14 00:00:47,479 --> 00:00:51,960 Speaker 1: When you describe being in a bad relationship, you know, 15 00:00:52,000 --> 00:00:54,440 Speaker 1: my marriage isn't going why? What? Well? Whatever? 16 00:00:54,440 --> 00:00:58,400 Speaker 2: The reason is back in the day. 17 00:00:58,600 --> 00:01:00,960 Speaker 1: And by back in the day, I mean twenty ten, 18 00:01:01,120 --> 00:01:03,840 Speaker 1: I don't mean like nineteen thirty, in nineteen eighty. 19 00:01:04,600 --> 00:01:08,440 Speaker 2: Yeah. Wow, it's not the amount of change, it's the 20 00:01:08,480 --> 00:01:10,160 Speaker 2: pace that's making people insane. 21 00:01:10,360 --> 00:01:15,560 Speaker 1: Yeah it is. Yeah, I want to make sure I 22 00:01:15,560 --> 00:01:17,479 Speaker 1: get the number completely right. 23 00:01:17,680 --> 00:01:20,440 Speaker 3: God, the fact that twenty ten was fifteen years ago. 24 00:01:21,080 --> 00:01:24,520 Speaker 2: Welcome to aging well and worth well. Yeah that too. 25 00:01:24,560 --> 00:01:27,119 Speaker 2: But the idea that in a lot of these things. 26 00:01:27,160 --> 00:01:31,959 Speaker 2: It's worth drawing a comparison between now and twenty ten. 27 00:01:32,319 --> 00:01:36,200 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, why would it be that didn't exist. Yeah, 28 00:01:36,520 --> 00:01:39,759 Speaker 1: if you compared you know, obviously eighteen seventy to eighteen 29 00:01:39,840 --> 00:01:42,560 Speaker 1: sixty in terms of marriage trends, there will be a 30 00:01:42,560 --> 00:01:43,240 Speaker 1: lot of difference. 31 00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:46,000 Speaker 2: Well, if you compare them in terms of number of 32 00:01:46,040 --> 00:01:48,960 Speaker 2: civil wars going on there, it'd be a difference. 33 00:01:49,000 --> 00:01:53,760 Speaker 1: But no, yeah, and so as recently as twenty ten, 34 00:01:53,840 --> 00:01:57,600 Speaker 1: so it's only fifteen years ago. Overall, the advice of 35 00:01:57,920 --> 00:02:01,600 Speaker 1: end the relationship was about a third, less than a third. 36 00:02:01,680 --> 00:02:05,200 Speaker 1: Thirty percent of the respondents would say end the relationship. 37 00:02:05,240 --> 00:02:07,000 Speaker 1: When you got on there with you, my marriage is 38 00:02:07,040 --> 00:02:07,400 Speaker 1: not happy. 39 00:02:07,400 --> 00:02:08,120 Speaker 2: Here's what's going on. 40 00:02:08,480 --> 00:02:13,960 Speaker 1: It's now over fifty percent. It's gone up twenty percent 41 00:02:14,919 --> 00:02:16,880 Speaker 1: just since twenty ten. Of people would say just end 42 00:02:16,919 --> 00:02:17,359 Speaker 1: your marriage. 43 00:02:17,440 --> 00:02:22,640 Speaker 2: Then, well that's got to be because fewer and fewer 44 00:02:22,639 --> 00:02:25,320 Speaker 2: people are in relationships, so they have no idea. What 45 00:02:25,320 --> 00:02:29,880 Speaker 2: they're talking about is that is that what's the explanation 46 00:02:29,919 --> 00:02:33,720 Speaker 2: is according to what you're looking at or well, all. 47 00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:37,480 Speaker 1: The other numbers decline a lot, So, uh, give space 48 00:02:37,760 --> 00:02:40,880 Speaker 1: and time to your spouse who you're having a problem 49 00:02:40,960 --> 00:02:45,520 Speaker 1: with has gone from twenty five percent of respondents down 50 00:02:45,639 --> 00:02:50,720 Speaker 1: to barely double digits. Say you should give your spouse 51 00:02:50,760 --> 00:02:55,040 Speaker 1: some time in space to try to fix this. It 52 00:02:55,080 --> 00:02:58,600 Speaker 1: all went down. Communicate about this went from a quarter 53 00:02:58,880 --> 00:03:02,680 Speaker 1: down to uh, barely double digits, just you know, the 54 00:03:02,720 --> 00:03:04,840 Speaker 1: simple idea of talk to them about it. 55 00:03:05,560 --> 00:03:12,399 Speaker 2: That's crazy, it is, I mean, that's stupid, it's toxic, 56 00:03:12,639 --> 00:03:16,400 Speaker 2: it's inexcusable. It's an indictment of everything that will follow. 57 00:03:16,720 --> 00:03:24,480 Speaker 1: Yes, so communicate and give space dropped a lot. Set 58 00:03:24,639 --> 00:03:27,640 Speaker 1: boundaries went up some, which is also a bit of 59 00:03:27,639 --> 00:03:31,600 Speaker 1: a negative. I mean it, it can be positive, but 60 00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:35,200 Speaker 1: it's got a little bit of a negative flare to it. 61 00:03:35,280 --> 00:03:38,160 Speaker 1: More than talk to them or give them some space, 62 00:03:38,480 --> 00:03:40,800 Speaker 1: set some strong boundaries with me, you're no longer allowed 63 00:03:40,840 --> 00:03:41,160 Speaker 1: to do this. 64 00:03:41,400 --> 00:03:42,640 Speaker 2: Yeah, take a relationship. 65 00:03:42,760 --> 00:03:44,800 Speaker 3: That's another way of cutting you know, cutting it off 66 00:03:44,920 --> 00:03:45,280 Speaker 3: kind of. 67 00:03:45,480 --> 00:03:48,560 Speaker 2: Yeah, but that's altimate to me. Sometimes it's necessary. 68 00:03:48,600 --> 00:03:53,520 Speaker 1: But yeah, h compromise went down about by about half. 69 00:03:54,000 --> 00:03:55,680 Speaker 2: Oh, of course it did. Yeah. 70 00:03:55,720 --> 00:03:57,960 Speaker 1: The only one that went up much, and it went 71 00:03:58,040 --> 00:04:02,040 Speaker 1: up a lot, from thirty percent to over fifty percent, 72 00:04:02,240 --> 00:04:07,080 Speaker 1: is end the relationship divorce that is crazy. 73 00:04:06,840 --> 00:04:09,320 Speaker 2: And then that's something. What does that mean about society? 74 00:04:09,600 --> 00:04:11,520 Speaker 2: I mean, if people aren't willing to work it out anymore, 75 00:04:11,640 --> 00:04:16,600 Speaker 2: clearly effort, Michael, I enjoyed judging as much as anybody. 76 00:04:17,279 --> 00:04:19,599 Speaker 2: I ought to be on the Supreme Court. I'm so judgment. 77 00:04:21,440 --> 00:04:30,520 Speaker 2: But if you not only haven't had serious relationships and 78 00:04:30,680 --> 00:04:34,040 Speaker 2: you just live an online life, and you're like kind 79 00:04:34,040 --> 00:04:37,880 Speaker 2: of the second generation of that fewer and fewer relations 80 00:04:37,880 --> 00:04:42,200 Speaker 2: so you haven't seen role models of good relationships in 81 00:04:42,320 --> 00:04:45,159 Speaker 2: front of you, how the f would you have any 82 00:04:45,200 --> 00:04:48,000 Speaker 2: idea what advice to give? And so what you're seeing 83 00:04:48,040 --> 00:04:50,640 Speaker 2: here is a bunch of cynical I live my life 84 00:04:50,760 --> 00:04:55,080 Speaker 2: online types saying very onliney things. 85 00:04:54,760 --> 00:04:57,920 Speaker 1: I would love to know. I don't know how much marriage. 86 00:04:58,400 --> 00:05:01,200 Speaker 1: The number of people getting married is chained in fifteen years. 87 00:05:01,240 --> 00:05:03,280 Speaker 1: I know it's declining, but I don't know. But I 88 00:05:03,600 --> 00:05:05,800 Speaker 1: think it's pretty solid that the number of people getting 89 00:05:05,800 --> 00:05:09,039 Speaker 1: into relationships at all has declined quite a bit. So 90 00:05:09,200 --> 00:05:11,839 Speaker 1: if you've never been in a relationship and you secretly 91 00:05:11,880 --> 00:05:13,400 Speaker 1: want to be in one, I don't care what you 92 00:05:13,440 --> 00:05:16,240 Speaker 1: say about how happy you are alone, you want to 93 00:05:16,240 --> 00:05:17,000 Speaker 1: be in a relationship. 94 00:05:17,040 --> 00:05:18,400 Speaker 2: You just do that's the way you're built. 95 00:05:18,720 --> 00:05:21,159 Speaker 1: But so you of course you're happier that other people 96 00:05:21,160 --> 00:05:24,960 Speaker 1: aren't in relationships. It whether you're whether you acknowledge it, 97 00:05:25,240 --> 00:05:28,160 Speaker 1: or it's all subconscious you hate somebody else being in 98 00:05:28,200 --> 00:05:29,160 Speaker 1: a happy relationship. 99 00:05:29,400 --> 00:05:32,359 Speaker 3: Yeah, it sounds yeah. These And this also sounds like 100 00:05:32,440 --> 00:05:34,800 Speaker 3: it might be coming from people who had one bad 101 00:05:34,880 --> 00:05:37,320 Speaker 3: relationship and have just said f them all kind of. 102 00:05:37,400 --> 00:05:39,599 Speaker 2: I was just going to bring up the person who's 103 00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:43,480 Speaker 2: had a couple of relationships and have given up or 104 00:05:43,560 --> 00:05:48,040 Speaker 2: they say, you know, there's no woman worth you know. 105 00:05:48,320 --> 00:05:50,719 Speaker 2: I won't put a sacrifices blah blah blah. 106 00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:52,040 Speaker 1: I won't put too fine a point on this to 107 00:05:52,120 --> 00:05:55,320 Speaker 1: keep myself out of trouble. But if your spouse starts 108 00:05:55,320 --> 00:05:59,480 Speaker 1: hanging around with divorced people it is who who are single, 109 00:05:59,839 --> 00:06:02,360 Speaker 1: it's much worse for you than if your spouse hangs 110 00:06:02,360 --> 00:06:05,400 Speaker 1: around with people who are making it work, going through 111 00:06:05,440 --> 00:06:08,000 Speaker 1: the grind of being married and raising kids and doing 112 00:06:08,040 --> 00:06:10,719 Speaker 1: the whole thing, as opposed to hanging around with somebody 113 00:06:10,720 --> 00:06:11,839 Speaker 1: who's divorced and talking. 114 00:06:11,640 --> 00:06:13,440 Speaker 2: About all the fun they could happen. Why do you 115 00:06:13,440 --> 00:06:14,040 Speaker 2: put up with that? 116 00:06:14,120 --> 00:06:17,599 Speaker 1: And blah blah blah, Because they love to cut this 117 00:06:18,360 --> 00:06:20,960 Speaker 1: divorce is a contagent. I've seen it over and over 118 00:06:20,960 --> 00:06:24,000 Speaker 1: again at various workplaces and stuff like that. Friend groups. 119 00:06:24,200 --> 00:06:27,240 Speaker 1: It is absolutely a contagion. And somebody else gives the 120 00:06:27,279 --> 00:06:29,880 Speaker 1: permission structure and then starts, you know, with the caretive. 121 00:06:29,880 --> 00:06:32,039 Speaker 1: Look how great this and fun this life is out 122 00:06:32,040 --> 00:06:35,839 Speaker 1: here compared to your drudgery. But if you hang around 123 00:06:35,880 --> 00:06:38,280 Speaker 1: with other people who are, like I said, doing the deal, 124 00:06:38,680 --> 00:06:40,960 Speaker 1: it's less likely to happen. And so you got all 125 00:06:40,960 --> 00:06:45,320 Speaker 1: these people on here reading these things. They're they're in 126 00:06:45,360 --> 00:06:47,640 Speaker 1: the no no, no, no, you should join us in 127 00:06:47,680 --> 00:06:50,919 Speaker 1: our happiness using my finger goes, because they're not that 128 00:06:51,000 --> 00:06:53,200 Speaker 1: happy out here in single world. 129 00:06:53,360 --> 00:06:54,479 Speaker 3: Yeah, misery loves company. 130 00:06:54,560 --> 00:06:58,040 Speaker 2: Yep, exactly. You know that's two hundred percent as a friend. 131 00:06:58,279 --> 00:07:01,000 Speaker 2: As a student rather of language, I have like shelves 132 00:07:01,040 --> 00:07:06,239 Speaker 2: of books of quotations. Is there one? I mean, because 133 00:07:06,279 --> 00:07:10,720 Speaker 2: misery loves company, Drunks want everybody to drink more, stoners 134 00:07:10,760 --> 00:07:13,000 Speaker 2: want everybody to take another hit or smoke if they 135 00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:16,560 Speaker 2: don't smoke pot, you know, is maybe birds of a 136 00:07:16,560 --> 00:07:18,560 Speaker 2: feather flock together. I'm trying to think, is there a 137 00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:24,120 Speaker 2: great quotation that communicates what we're talking about. Everybody feels 138 00:07:24,160 --> 00:07:27,680 Speaker 2: better if more people are doing what they're doing, they 139 00:07:27,720 --> 00:07:29,800 Speaker 2: feel justified in themselves. 140 00:07:30,200 --> 00:07:33,600 Speaker 1: If you get divorced too, Yeah, I know because I've 141 00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:37,160 Speaker 1: seen it one hundred percent. Like I've had friends who 142 00:07:37,320 --> 00:07:39,920 Speaker 1: I've watched this appen not only with my own life, 143 00:07:40,120 --> 00:07:45,040 Speaker 1: but they enjoy when their friend gets divorced too. Somehow, 144 00:07:45,040 --> 00:07:46,880 Speaker 1: it I don't know, makes them feel better. 145 00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:49,280 Speaker 2: I don't know why. And you have kind of a 146 00:07:49,360 --> 00:07:50,600 Speaker 2: kinship going, I guess. 147 00:07:50,800 --> 00:07:52,800 Speaker 3: And on the flip side, I've actually been in this 148 00:07:52,880 --> 00:07:56,160 Speaker 3: situation where I've had a friend get irritated with me 149 00:07:56,280 --> 00:07:59,280 Speaker 3: when I got married and my life started getting better. 150 00:07:59,480 --> 00:08:03,560 Speaker 2: Sure, yeah, I've seen that also, yep. Absolutely, Oh is 151 00:08:03,600 --> 00:08:05,080 Speaker 2: that persons still a friend? Yeah? 152 00:08:05,080 --> 00:08:08,520 Speaker 1: Wow, absolutely. When you're younger, I remember, like you know, 153 00:08:08,600 --> 00:08:10,400 Speaker 1: you got the friend group. All us dudes were hanging 154 00:08:10,440 --> 00:08:12,560 Speaker 1: out or watching a football game on Saturday, drinking beer, 155 00:08:12,840 --> 00:08:14,800 Speaker 1: and then somebody gets a steady girlfriend and they're not 156 00:08:14,880 --> 00:08:18,720 Speaker 1: part of that anymore. You secretly want the steady girlfriend 157 00:08:18,760 --> 00:08:21,480 Speaker 1: like they have, right, but you're kind of angry that 158 00:08:21,520 --> 00:08:23,360 Speaker 1: they do, and you'd love it if they broke up 159 00:08:23,360 --> 00:08:25,040 Speaker 1: and they come back to hang out with you. Drinking beer, 160 00:08:25,080 --> 00:08:28,000 Speaker 1: watching football, wasting your wife on a Sunday afternoon. 161 00:08:29,040 --> 00:08:30,760 Speaker 2: That's just the way we're built, I guess. 162 00:08:31,440 --> 00:08:34,360 Speaker 1: But the fact that it's moved that much in fifteen 163 00:08:34,480 --> 00:08:35,840 Speaker 1: years is the thing. 164 00:08:36,280 --> 00:08:38,560 Speaker 2: Oh my god, that's right. I'd kind of spaced off 165 00:08:38,559 --> 00:08:40,240 Speaker 2: that it was fifteen years. 166 00:08:40,600 --> 00:08:43,880 Speaker 1: Yeah, so now, oh my, it's just since twenty ten 167 00:08:43,920 --> 00:08:46,480 Speaker 1: that's gone from thirty percent to over fifty percent of 168 00:08:46,720 --> 00:08:47,440 Speaker 1: divorce them. 169 00:08:47,880 --> 00:08:48,760 Speaker 3: That's so crazy. 170 00:08:48,920 --> 00:08:53,040 Speaker 2: So dump them is now almost five to one over 171 00:08:53,280 --> 00:09:00,480 Speaker 2: communicate or give them space. That's that's okay, that's just 172 00:09:00,960 --> 00:09:05,760 Speaker 2: you're you're in a cesspool. You're asking just stupid, ignorant, 173 00:09:05,800 --> 00:09:07,199 Speaker 2: evil people for advice. 174 00:09:08,520 --> 00:09:10,360 Speaker 1: Well that's kind of what redd it is. It should 175 00:09:10,360 --> 00:09:15,160 Speaker 1: be their sub edit, right, asking stupid people for their advice. 176 00:09:15,400 --> 00:09:18,320 Speaker 3: Yeah, stupid evil people, trolls giving advice. 177 00:09:19,880 --> 00:09:27,400 Speaker 2: We are in a spot turned to ignorant trolls. Misery 178 00:09:27,559 --> 00:09:30,840 Speaker 2: loves company. Maybe it's as simple as that could be, 179 00:09:31,320 --> 00:09:35,640 Speaker 2: or but it's it's more than misery though. It's it's 180 00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:40,640 Speaker 2: every drunk wants everybody else to have one more drink 181 00:09:40,760 --> 00:09:44,520 Speaker 2: to because it gives you cover. I don't have a problem. 182 00:09:44,600 --> 00:09:50,960 Speaker 2: Everybody's doing it. Humans don't I don't like it. 183 00:09:51,400 --> 00:09:55,959 Speaker 1: And on that trajectory, where's that gonna be in five, 184 00:09:56,120 --> 00:09:57,000 Speaker 1: ten more years? 185 00:09:57,360 --> 00:09:59,720 Speaker 3: Oh boy, that's a scary thought. 186 00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:01,760 Speaker 1: Is there any reason I think that's gonna level off 187 00:10:01,840 --> 00:10:03,760 Speaker 1: or start stop going at that rate? 188 00:10:04,840 --> 00:10:10,839 Speaker 2: Miserable, childless isolation. That's fine, it's a pretty steep chart. 189 00:10:12,040 --> 00:10:16,360 Speaker 3: All be dating robots, Yep, don't date robots. 190 00:10:16,679 --> 00:10:19,559 Speaker 2: We'll all be dating robots. That's what's saying, Daton, No, 191 00:10:19,679 --> 00:10:23,040 Speaker 2: damn robot. What they look like. There's one more woman 192 00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:27,120 Speaker 2: on earth. I'm gonna find her. Oh my god, they're 193 00:10:27,120 --> 00:10:30,360 Speaker 2: looking real. Now what can I jags do in sex bots? 194 00:10:30,440 --> 00:10:33,559 Speaker 2: Jack's doing sex bots? How can I dress them to 195 00:10:33,640 --> 00:10:35,079 Speaker 2: mock you like it's a schoolard? 196 00:10:35,640 --> 00:10:38,800 Speaker 3: However you want, Jack, that's the beauty of dating robots. 197 00:10:38,840 --> 00:10:40,920 Speaker 1: It's it's I actually feel the opposite of it. I 198 00:10:40,920 --> 00:10:42,679 Speaker 1: feel like, as a single man out in the world, 199 00:10:42,679 --> 00:10:45,920 Speaker 1: there's more opportunities for me as some as you weirdos 200 00:10:45,960 --> 00:10:50,840 Speaker 1: go that direction and uh and isolate more as a 201 00:10:50,880 --> 00:10:51,360 Speaker 1: single man. 202 00:10:53,160 --> 00:10:56,360 Speaker 2: That I had a sex bot, I'd have it look 203 00:10:56,559 --> 00:10:57,400 Speaker 2: just like my wife. 204 00:10:58,400 --> 00:11:00,680 Speaker 1: Oh that that should be on a car, That should 205 00:11:00,679 --> 00:11:03,080 Speaker 1: actually be you gotta write that, du Yeah, send that 206 00:11:03,120 --> 00:11:03,640 Speaker 1: to Hallmark. 207 00:11:03,840 --> 00:11:07,560 Speaker 2: It's complete bullet, but it's you know, it's a nice sentiment. Wow, 208 00:11:10,400 --> 00:11:12,760 Speaker 2: I've already got one of those. Maybe I want a 209 00:11:12,840 --> 00:11:16,600 Speaker 2: tall redhead that doesn't make me a monster, does it? No, 210 00:11:16,960 --> 00:11:22,040 Speaker 2: I'm gonna ask credit. Well, I guess that's it.