1 00:00:08,039 --> 00:00:23,079 Speaker 1: Life. Hey everyone, Emily a body here. You are listening 2 00:00:23,120 --> 00:00:28,360 Speaker 1: to five Minute Friday from Hurdle. Hope everyone here had 3 00:00:28,400 --> 00:00:31,840 Speaker 1: a good fourth of July. I myself spent it down 4 00:00:32,000 --> 00:00:36,440 Speaker 1: in Washington, d C. Nothing more patriotic than doing the 5 00:00:36,560 --> 00:00:41,040 Speaker 1: nation's birthday in the nation's capital. Got to hang out 6 00:00:41,040 --> 00:00:44,560 Speaker 1: with some of my dearest friends and really just take 7 00:00:44,640 --> 00:00:46,839 Speaker 1: some time off, a little bit of time away from 8 00:00:46,920 --> 00:00:49,640 Speaker 1: social media, a little bit of time away from things 9 00:00:49,640 --> 00:00:53,080 Speaker 1: that feel quite hectic right now, and candidly, it really 10 00:00:53,159 --> 00:00:58,560 Speaker 1: felt necessary. Something that also felt necessary for me was 11 00:00:58,600 --> 00:01:03,320 Speaker 1: a conversation I have earlier this week. I wrote about 12 00:01:03,360 --> 00:01:05,839 Speaker 1: this in today's weekly Hurdle, and if you don't get 13 00:01:05,880 --> 00:01:08,800 Speaker 1: the newsletter, I would love for you to do so, 14 00:01:08,840 --> 00:01:11,119 Speaker 1: you can sign up to get it for free in 15 00:01:11,160 --> 00:01:15,000 Speaker 1: your inbox every single Friday. But the conversation I had 16 00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:21,679 Speaker 1: is about gatekeeping my own joy. So I'll be honest. 17 00:01:21,840 --> 00:01:24,440 Speaker 1: There have certainly been, and I'm sure many of you 18 00:01:24,480 --> 00:01:26,880 Speaker 1: can relate to this, so many things that have happened 19 00:01:26,880 --> 00:01:31,000 Speaker 1: in my life that I've been really excited about and 20 00:01:31,040 --> 00:01:34,399 Speaker 1: then didn't pan out how I'd hoped that they would. 21 00:01:35,080 --> 00:01:37,600 Speaker 1: And the fact is is that you don't work hard 22 00:01:37,959 --> 00:01:40,560 Speaker 1: at something for it not to go as you'd hoped. 23 00:01:41,080 --> 00:01:45,039 Speaker 1: But let me give a couple examples. Here, I'm talking 24 00:01:45,080 --> 00:01:48,880 Speaker 1: about dating someone and it feels really promising and you're 25 00:01:48,920 --> 00:01:52,600 Speaker 1: really excited, and then all of a sudden, this person 26 00:01:53,000 --> 00:01:59,280 Speaker 1: ghosts you, or perhaps you are in conversation with a 27 00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:02,760 Speaker 1: brand or an individual about a really exciting opportunity. You 28 00:02:02,840 --> 00:02:07,800 Speaker 1: have multiple conversations about sat opportunity, and then after putting 29 00:02:07,840 --> 00:02:11,800 Speaker 1: in time and effort and work on this thing, suddenly 30 00:02:12,120 --> 00:02:15,840 Speaker 1: the thing is no more. Suddenly everything that was promised 31 00:02:15,840 --> 00:02:20,000 Speaker 1: to you, everything that was quote unquote hypothetical, is now 32 00:02:20,520 --> 00:02:24,320 Speaker 1: a non option. And these things happen often in a 33 00:02:24,360 --> 00:02:27,760 Speaker 1: way that is beyond our control. Right, you don't again 34 00:02:27,840 --> 00:02:31,880 Speaker 1: work hard and have all these exciting hopes to then 35 00:02:32,440 --> 00:02:35,440 Speaker 1: think that you're going to get let down. But it happens, 36 00:02:35,880 --> 00:02:39,200 Speaker 1: and sadly, it happens more than I'd like to admit, 37 00:02:39,280 --> 00:02:42,720 Speaker 1: I mean candidly, If we look at a week of 38 00:02:43,360 --> 00:02:48,000 Speaker 1: me pitching ideas or saying things, or asking questions or 39 00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:51,600 Speaker 1: making big asks, I hear a lot more no than yes. 40 00:02:52,040 --> 00:02:55,079 Speaker 1: And that's just part of the game, at least when 41 00:02:55,080 --> 00:02:59,359 Speaker 1: it comes to work anyway. And so I have realized 42 00:02:59,560 --> 00:03:04,280 Speaker 1: that even when something exciting is happening for me, I 43 00:03:04,480 --> 00:03:08,800 Speaker 1: am often the type of person that can't or feels 44 00:03:08,840 --> 00:03:12,919 Speaker 1: as though they can't get excited just yet because it's 45 00:03:12,960 --> 00:03:15,960 Speaker 1: not signed on the dotted line. Especially when it comes 46 00:03:16,000 --> 00:03:18,919 Speaker 1: to work. Until I have a contract in my hand 47 00:03:19,000 --> 00:03:23,200 Speaker 1: that someone else has already signed, I am extremely hesitant 48 00:03:23,240 --> 00:03:26,639 Speaker 1: to be amped. And I was telling my life coach 49 00:03:26,680 --> 00:03:29,720 Speaker 1: about this earlier this week and she says to me, 50 00:03:30,440 --> 00:03:35,600 Speaker 1: it sounds like you're gatekeeping your own joy, and oh man, 51 00:03:35,720 --> 00:03:38,480 Speaker 1: that one burned. It was like she put a cigarette 52 00:03:38,560 --> 00:03:43,320 Speaker 1: on my arm. I hear what she's saying, and I 53 00:03:43,360 --> 00:03:45,560 Speaker 1: heard what she's saying, and actually so much so that 54 00:03:46,040 --> 00:03:49,160 Speaker 1: I'm in a mode of celebration right now because I 55 00:03:49,280 --> 00:03:53,040 Speaker 1: have a major opportunity on the table and the contract 56 00:03:53,120 --> 00:03:56,400 Speaker 1: might not be signed yet, but literally, I am having 57 00:03:56,400 --> 00:04:00,800 Speaker 1: a conversation that I dreamed about having last year, truly 58 00:04:00,880 --> 00:04:05,880 Speaker 1: dreamed about having. And rather then sit around and pretend 59 00:04:05,880 --> 00:04:08,480 Speaker 1: that I'm not amped, pretend that I'm not excited, just 60 00:04:08,560 --> 00:04:12,520 Speaker 1: wait with baited breath, right she said to me, She said, 61 00:04:12,560 --> 00:04:15,600 Speaker 1: why not celebrate right now? Why are you going to 62 00:04:15,640 --> 00:04:20,560 Speaker 1: neglect yourself of this opportunity to feel joy because basically, 63 00:04:21,279 --> 00:04:24,039 Speaker 1: you know this to be true. If it doesn't happen, 64 00:04:24,120 --> 00:04:28,400 Speaker 1: or if it does happen, you will have the same 65 00:04:28,480 --> 00:04:32,640 Speaker 1: disappointment if it doesn't. So why not in this moment 66 00:04:33,160 --> 00:04:36,280 Speaker 1: allow yourself to feel all of the good that comes 67 00:04:36,320 --> 00:04:39,400 Speaker 1: with working hard and going after something that excites you. 68 00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:42,320 Speaker 1: And I know I gave this dating analogy earlier, but 69 00:04:42,360 --> 00:04:46,440 Speaker 1: it really is the same with our personal relationships. Yes, 70 00:04:46,960 --> 00:04:50,159 Speaker 1: there is always the possibility that someone can let you down, 71 00:04:50,240 --> 00:04:53,360 Speaker 1: whether it is romantic or just a friendship, or within 72 00:04:53,400 --> 00:04:56,920 Speaker 1: your family even but when you go on a bad date, 73 00:04:57,839 --> 00:04:59,600 Speaker 1: sooner or later you might swear off dating for a 74 00:04:59,640 --> 00:05:01,880 Speaker 1: little bit, but you're going to go on another date. 75 00:05:02,880 --> 00:05:07,520 Speaker 1: So I choose now to allow myself to feel the joy, 76 00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:11,440 Speaker 1: to be vulnerable to disappointment, but understand that I am 77 00:05:11,480 --> 00:05:14,360 Speaker 1: worthy of every good thing that comes to me, and 78 00:05:14,480 --> 00:05:20,680 Speaker 1: so are you. Yeah, no more gatekeeping our joy, no 79 00:05:20,800 --> 00:05:21,880 Speaker 1: more living scared. 80 00:05:22,000 --> 00:05:22,160 Speaker 2: Right. 81 00:05:22,720 --> 00:05:25,599 Speaker 1: My thought prompt for you this week? What is one 82 00:05:25,640 --> 00:05:28,120 Speaker 1: thing that you're excited about right now? What's one thing 83 00:05:28,160 --> 00:05:31,200 Speaker 1: that brings you joy? What is one thing that you're 84 00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:34,200 Speaker 1: excited about right now? And what is one thing that 85 00:05:34,200 --> 00:05:37,640 Speaker 1: brings you joy, And now a listener question. 86 00:05:38,360 --> 00:05:41,240 Speaker 2: I recently listened to episode one of Hurdle, and it 87 00:05:41,320 --> 00:05:43,839 Speaker 2: made me wonder how often you go back and listen 88 00:05:43,880 --> 00:05:46,680 Speaker 2: to that episode. When was the last time you listened 89 00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:50,360 Speaker 2: to episode one? And what thoughts and feelings does listen 90 00:05:50,440 --> 00:05:51,839 Speaker 2: to that episode bring up for you? 91 00:05:53,000 --> 00:05:53,720 Speaker 1: As always? 92 00:05:53,839 --> 00:05:55,600 Speaker 2: Thank you so much for everything you do. 93 00:05:55,839 --> 00:05:57,920 Speaker 1: Wow Episode one. I'm going to link it in the 94 00:05:57,960 --> 00:06:00,240 Speaker 1: show notes. It's been a second since I listened to it, 95 00:06:00,279 --> 00:06:03,880 Speaker 1: but I do remember. Maybe it was last year was 96 00:06:03,920 --> 00:06:06,960 Speaker 1: the last time that I gave it a go, And candidly, 97 00:06:07,040 --> 00:06:13,760 Speaker 1: I was surprised at how from like a podcasting audio pov, 98 00:06:14,640 --> 00:06:18,200 Speaker 1: how good I thought it was, which sounds kind of corny. 99 00:06:18,240 --> 00:06:21,600 Speaker 1: But the first time you do something, it would be 100 00:06:21,720 --> 00:06:26,120 Speaker 1: unrealistic for you to expect it to be perfect. I 101 00:06:26,200 --> 00:06:30,719 Speaker 1: know that I certainly have perfectionist tendencies and I want 102 00:06:30,760 --> 00:06:33,839 Speaker 1: everything that I create to be of a certain caliber. 103 00:06:34,320 --> 00:06:38,240 Speaker 1: But I expected to listen to it and feel a 104 00:06:38,279 --> 00:06:42,040 Speaker 1: bit cringey, and I didn't really feel that way. In fact, 105 00:06:42,200 --> 00:06:44,800 Speaker 1: I was really proud of how I showed up to 106 00:06:44,880 --> 00:06:47,680 Speaker 1: that podcast, and I remember recording it in my fourth 107 00:06:47,720 --> 00:06:51,039 Speaker 1: floor walk up on the Upper East side and exactly 108 00:06:51,560 --> 00:06:54,320 Speaker 1: what I was going through and all the emotions that 109 00:06:54,320 --> 00:06:56,719 Speaker 1: went hand in hand with it. I remember that, and 110 00:06:56,760 --> 00:07:01,720 Speaker 1: I remember the feelings, so many feeling But yeah, I mean, 111 00:07:01,839 --> 00:07:04,559 Speaker 1: I listened to that episode and I think of that woman. 112 00:07:04,680 --> 00:07:08,000 Speaker 1: I think of that version of myself, and I am 113 00:07:08,120 --> 00:07:10,440 Speaker 1: proud of her. I'm proud that she was willing to 114 00:07:10,440 --> 00:07:12,760 Speaker 1: put herself out there. I'm proud of myself now when 115 00:07:12,760 --> 00:07:15,680 Speaker 1: I reflect back and see how far I've come, and 116 00:07:15,880 --> 00:07:20,000 Speaker 1: I know that that person and yes it's the same person, 117 00:07:20,160 --> 00:07:23,880 Speaker 1: but that version of myself I've evolved from that place, 118 00:07:24,000 --> 00:07:27,840 Speaker 1: and oh man, is it a really awesome journey to 119 00:07:27,880 --> 00:07:30,680 Speaker 1: look back on. I think that if I could tell 120 00:07:30,960 --> 00:07:35,040 Speaker 1: my younger self anything as she was starting this podcast, 121 00:07:35,080 --> 00:07:38,640 Speaker 1: it's just to be open to all of the possibilities 122 00:07:38,680 --> 00:07:41,480 Speaker 1: that could go hand in hand with this idea, this 123 00:07:41,600 --> 00:07:45,120 Speaker 1: crazy idea, right because at the time it felt so 124 00:07:45,400 --> 00:07:48,920 Speaker 1: beyond It felt like just a little side project that 125 00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:52,280 Speaker 1: I would do. And now Hurdle has become the main thing. 126 00:07:52,800 --> 00:07:55,520 Speaker 1: Hurdle is the thing that empowers me to have so 127 00:07:55,600 --> 00:07:59,840 Speaker 1: many amazing conversations and chase these dreams that I mean 128 00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:03,080 Speaker 1: I have always had, but they are growing and evolving 129 00:08:03,200 --> 00:08:08,840 Speaker 1: with me, and you're just so damn exciting. Oh man, 130 00:08:09,160 --> 00:08:12,559 Speaker 1: what a week, What a weekend. Make sure you're following 131 00:08:12,640 --> 00:08:15,880 Speaker 1: hurdle over on social. It's over at Hurdle Podcast, I'm 132 00:08:15,880 --> 00:08:20,760 Speaker 1: over at Emily a Body. Another hurdle conquered. Thanks guys, 133 00:08:21,040 --> 00:08:23,240 Speaker 1: I appreciate you. Talk to you soon