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Speaker 1: Hello the Internet, and welcome to this episode of I

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Speaker 1: tried so hard, it got so far, But in the

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Speaker 1: trendie it doesn't even matter where to see a ben Acosta.

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Speaker 1: I'm Jack O'Brien. That's Miles Gray. Yes, this is gonna

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Speaker 1: be silence for the next five minutes while we let

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Speaker 1: our vocal courts. Yeah, uh, vocal warm ups. Yeah, they

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Speaker 1: just so you guys know, z gang, we're still going strong.

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Speaker 1: Still here, everybody's given up. Look at your heroes then

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Speaker 1: b A, then hl MLB, cowards, podcasters who made content

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Speaker 1: from their own homes, possibly without a tangible good to

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Speaker 1: ship that can be done digitally. Heroes, heroes, uh, although

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Speaker 1: we might be might be coming to you from our

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Speaker 1: own homes, uh in the not too distant future. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: When you look at some of the things that health

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Speaker 1: officials are saying out loud, you're like, oh, like l

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Speaker 1: a county is like we've tested two seven people in

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Speaker 1: the county, Yes, of a hundred million people, Like wait

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Speaker 1: in the last hour. Oh you mean overall overall overall? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's not good. That's not enough people. Yeah. And I

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Speaker 1: think in Ohio they were saying one of the health

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Speaker 1: officials there said something to the effect of they believe

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Speaker 1: maybe one percent of the state could have it. Eleven

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Speaker 1: million people there, people, so jesus, yeah, probably, I'm sorry.

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Speaker 1: Are probably what am I saying? Our county is ten million.

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Speaker 1: I didn't say a hundred delusions of grands are I

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Speaker 1: don't mean to a grand eyes, Yeah, state, grand county,

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Speaker 1: grand news, fake news, to hoax folks. Uh, let's talk

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Speaker 1: about what's trending. So you have to go down to

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Speaker 1: number fifteen on Google search trends to find a non

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Speaker 1: Corona story. So we'll close out with that one. But

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Speaker 1: right now MLB is trend ding. Uh not Michael Lee

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Speaker 1: and back. Yeah, I'm on fire. Major League Baseball spring

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Speaker 1: training suspended, opening day pushed back two weeks. It's happening. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's pretty optimistic to think because I think there's seasons

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Speaker 1: supposed to start March, right, So I mean, if they're

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Speaker 1: doing that, I mean, still happen, dude. MLB's happening, like dude. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: so yeah, that sucks. I feel like Major League Baseball

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Speaker 1: would be the weirdest one to happen in a empty

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Speaker 1: stadium because like it's such a dead sport anyway. I mean,

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Speaker 1: like without fans, it would just feel like, yeah, it

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Speaker 1: would just it would feel like I don't know. Maybe

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Speaker 1: it's because I've seen so much basketball played in places

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Speaker 1: without fans that it doesn't seem that weird to me

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Speaker 1: to like imagine them just playing an empty gym with

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Speaker 1: like just the squeak of sneakers, right right right? Um?

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Speaker 1: But yeah, baseball just because the not a lot of

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Speaker 1: I guess you'd hear more chatter. Yeah, yeah, Um, anyways,

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Speaker 1: more chowder. U n C Double A tournament was going

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Speaker 1: to be played with no fans. It has now been canceled.

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Speaker 1: March Madness, March Madness, the tournament is no more. Yes,

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Speaker 1: both both n C Double A basketball tournaments. Did the

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Speaker 1: n I T also have to get canceled? I had

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Speaker 1: no women's what about n I T? Though? I still

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Speaker 1: n I T is just lit. They invite all the teams. Uh,

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Speaker 1: that's I mean that sucks, especially if you're a senior, yeah,

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Speaker 1: playing basketball, like in your collegiate athlete for any sport

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Speaker 1: that's being suspended, Like yes, you know, what do you

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Speaker 1: do with for your eligibility? I mean, I'm sure they'll

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Speaker 1: figure that out, but at that point, do you even

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Speaker 1: want to come back. That's fun. I mean, this is

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Speaker 1: sort of what happens. This is when there are things

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Speaker 1: that are out of our control. Uh. DOW is trending

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Speaker 1: because it just saw the biggest drop, single day drop

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Speaker 1: since seven. Don't drop, don't, don't don't. I never knew

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Speaker 1: there was a lost like this before. Yeah, so you're

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Speaker 1: gonna bring it home. And yeah, I mean whenever I

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Speaker 1: hear something something dropped, I hear Fatman Scoop's voice in

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Speaker 1: my head. Um, yeah seven, like that other really bad

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Speaker 1: called Black Monday. Yeah yeah, yeah, I was but a

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Speaker 1: wee baby. Yeah, I was but seven year old and

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Speaker 1: don't remember it at all. I think at seven year

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Speaker 1: old baby a baby. Yeah, I mean to me now,

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Speaker 1: at the time, I was, you know, going work every day,

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Speaker 1: big yeah. Um, but this is Yeah. So it started

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Speaker 1: off dropping a lot, then it kind of recovered when

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Speaker 1: the Fed announced they were going to pump a trillion

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Speaker 1: back in to the economy to kind of help cover

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Speaker 1: some with the losses. And then people are like yeah,

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Speaker 1: but at the same time, and then it went back

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Speaker 1: down to a full ten percent loss in a single day,

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Speaker 1: throwing a trillion dollars in there, and yet there are

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Speaker 1: people who still get hung up on how are we

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Speaker 1: going to pay for people's healthcare? How are we gonna

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Speaker 1: pay the council student debt? Yeah, eat my fucking shorts. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: what the fuck. It's just it's so disingenuous right where

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Speaker 1: there's such a willing willingness to have a blind spot

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Speaker 1: about funding and where money comes from. If it's to

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Speaker 1: prop up the corporate sector, It's like, dude, it's an afterthought, baby. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: but what you what you're not thinking about is you

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Speaker 1: never know when these big banks are going to get

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Speaker 1: into trouble, and so you need that money on hand

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Speaker 1: to pay the big banks so that they're okay, because

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Speaker 1: you know you don't want that Atlas shrugging. Uh, it's

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Speaker 1: amazing how many of the screen names of the people

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Speaker 1: I see still defending Trump our references to uh Iron

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Speaker 1: Rand books. It's it's like John Galt gaults heroes. I mean, look,

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Speaker 1: do you think what the estimates, uh student, that's like

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Speaker 1: one point four trillion could have done that plus all

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Speaker 1: the other stuff. I mean, you can get food stamps

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Speaker 1: for seven people for about a billion dollars, not funk,

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Speaker 1: all that we gotta they paying for it. Exactly exactly.

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Speaker 1: But we're propping these are our fucking taxes, man, God

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Speaker 1: damn it. Yeah, um, eat my shorts Wall stre I

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Speaker 1: love this, Eat my shorts Wall Street. What if that

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Speaker 1: became the new occupied eat my shorts Wall Streight, or

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Speaker 1: like force feeding our shorts to like investment bankers. I mean,

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Speaker 1: that would be one of the less violent ways it

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Speaker 1: could go. Yeah, but we shredded up, put pasta sauce

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Speaker 1: on or something. You want to want to go down easy.

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Speaker 1: Still gotta eat the shorts, though, gotta be humane. Disneyland

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Speaker 1: is trending. Uh so there. We we did notice it.

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Speaker 1: We thought it was a little strange. Earlier in the

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Speaker 1: day that they had announced that in California, all crowds

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Speaker 1: over I think a thousand people, all gatherings of more

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Speaker 1: than two fifty to a thousand. I think some counties

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Speaker 1: have stricter ones. But yet it was just like anything,

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Speaker 1: any gathering of people was being outlawed, except Disneyland, which

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Speaker 1: is a tourist mecca, you know, a place where people

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Speaker 1: from all over the world are coming to all over

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Speaker 1: the country. Uh yeah, for a moment they've probably been

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Speaker 1: waiting a long time for, especially they're traveling far. I'm

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Speaker 1: going to drop on that ship just because of a

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Speaker 1: little dry cough, yea fever. I mean, could you imagine though,

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Speaker 1: right take coronavirus test is to be in that Indiana

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Speaker 1: Jones line where it's completely enclosed and I have like

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Speaker 1: two people coughing in there. I've I've never been to

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Speaker 1: a big theme park that was crowded without feeling like

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Speaker 1: I was getting sick. Yeah, we're all going to get

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Speaker 1: each other's anyways. Uh, that's closed. However, Universal Studios Hollywood

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Speaker 1: open still here, still out here. Unfortunately, people continue to

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Speaker 1: not go there, so it's not there wasn't too much

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Speaker 1: of a hard call for them on that one. I'm

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Speaker 1: sure they'll close at some point, But I wonder I'm

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Speaker 1: really curious to know, like what the real calculus at

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Speaker 1: some of these like organizations and companies are when they're

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Speaker 1: really like I'm sure they're they have a full on

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Speaker 1: way to analyze what this means to our bottom line?

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Speaker 1: Does it make more sense to say we're postponing? Will

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Speaker 1: that delay the effects of other things? If we say

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Speaker 1: we're postponing versus canceling, when do we close the thing?

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Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, but I think we're seeing, you know,

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Speaker 1: when it comes to a you know, market oriented administration

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Speaker 1: like we have, and the idea that they're trying to

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Speaker 1: keep their numbers down so as not to hurt the market.

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Speaker 1: Uh so therefore not making testing available across the country.

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Speaker 1: I think like that is the overall like market ethos

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Speaker 1: taken to its logical endpoint, and like you see it

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Speaker 1: also in just isolated cases. There's this book Corporations or

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Speaker 1: Corporation that the Corporation, uh that talks about how it

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Speaker 1: basically tells the story of American corporations if they were

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Speaker 1: like making decisions as individuals, and it makes the argument

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Speaker 1: that they would be sociopaths because they will, like they

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Speaker 1: are multiple instances of car companies knowing that a defect

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Speaker 1: or you know, some design feature is going to cause

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Speaker 1: many deaths, but they you know, make the calculation that

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Speaker 1: the class action suits are going to be less than

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Speaker 1: the cost of correcting it, and so they just let

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Speaker 1: it happen. And you know that when when you expect

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Speaker 1: the market and a bunch of corporations just not being

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Speaker 1: uh you know, forced to do anything to be the

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Speaker 1: people who run air society, you're going to have some

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Speaker 1: problems right, Um, but you know a lot of them

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Speaker 1: are closing down and who knows, who knows why they're

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Speaker 1: doing it for for these right reasons other than that,

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Speaker 1: you know, they have people who work for them. Uh.

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Speaker 1: Toilet paper is gone yeah everywhere? Yeah in these United States?

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Speaker 1: Yeah uh yeah, I mean the biggest flex right now,

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Speaker 1: teeping someone's house more than anything. Money has no value. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure toilet paper is the one true currency

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Speaker 1: at the moment. Yeah, there's plenty of websites if you

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Speaker 1: look out how to wipe your ass without toilet paper,

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Speaker 1: there's no one way to do it, baby, And it's

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Speaker 1: not just like just pull your shirt down a little bit,

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Speaker 1: like you have some corn husks lying around. Okay, I

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Speaker 1: got a rock? Is that really still little be scrape? Okay? Yeah? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I mean that makes sense for like camp clean X

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Speaker 1: clean X Yeah okay, but you can't flesh the clean X.

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Speaker 1: But that's not the end of the world. Yeah. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I just have like a look at a lot of

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Speaker 1: countries you go to where you're unable to even flush

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Speaker 1: your toilet paper anyway, So set up that little garbage,

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Speaker 1: can you know what I mean? Or just hopping the

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Speaker 1: shower right away. Yeah, you know, yeah, if you're at

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Speaker 1: a friend's house, so be it. Yeah, don't be at

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Speaker 1: a friend's house. Maybe is the is the answer to that?

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Speaker 1: They're like, hey, man, can you be a home and

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Speaker 1: let me shower real quickly? Take thank you so much? Um? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's it's pretty much like wherever you go, it's either

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Speaker 1: being rationed very carefully or there it's the breaks have

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Speaker 1: come off and you see people scrambling with that ship.

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Speaker 1: Or you could check out the eh how article I

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Speaker 1: just posted how to turn your friends bathroom sink into

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Speaker 1: a bidet with this cool attachment just your wallet. Gross um,

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Speaker 1: simple hack. Yeah. But anyways, Uh, toilet paper I guess,

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Speaker 1: I guess is necessity, but probably doesn't have to be.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I yeah, we surely wouldn't have wanted, but

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Speaker 1: I don't think you will perish without it unless you

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Speaker 1: have some kind of very rare condition or something. So

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Speaker 1: let's go all the way down to number fifteen on

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Speaker 1: Google search trends for the day, where we find ilhan

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Speaker 1: Omar is trending she got married. Congrats, Yeah, so shout

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Speaker 1: out to her. That's wow. At least they took a

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Speaker 1: second to acknowledge the wonderful wedding. Yeah, I have a

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Speaker 1: question technically, the IDEs of the IDEs of March when

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Speaker 1: Julius Caesar was assassinated. Uh, the IDEs of March will

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Speaker 1: be the fift Is that what it means? It's yeah,

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Speaker 1: but the fifteenth in March. Yes, so that means it's

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Speaker 1: this Sunday. We have a Friday. Yeah. Um, I can

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Speaker 1: only wait to see what history brings to our doorstep

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Speaker 1: on Sunday. Or everything is changing every fucking day, Like

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Speaker 1: there were ship we recorded earlier that they were like,

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Speaker 1: all right, we're gonna cut that out because things change

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Speaker 1: on a dime. Yeah. Um, but yeah, I just think

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Speaker 1: of that. I always think of the aides of more. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: we had a whole twenty minute chunk about how ill

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Speaker 1: han Omar is an available. Uh, she's out there on

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Speaker 1: the mark. It's going to happen, he fell, They're gonna

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Speaker 1: follow through with this wedding. Don't know ilahn Omar still

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Speaker 1: not married. That was twenty minutes of our earlier broadcast

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Speaker 1: Way very short episode. Yes, but yeah, this is Um,

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Speaker 1: I'm curious if no you know, like, will you know?

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Speaker 1: In my mind, I'm like, well, Trump figure out that

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Speaker 1: he's wholly unfit for this job. Yeah, and I'll go

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Speaker 1: back a fantasy world. You seem to have a thought

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Speaker 1: that he could resign like her a hope do you

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Speaker 1: think do you think there's any like any hope of that.

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Speaker 1: I don't know, because the logic I'm applying is logic, right,

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Speaker 1: So I feel like if this had happened, maybe in

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Speaker 1: the first couple of years of his administration, he would

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Speaker 1: have been like, Oh, I'm not like that, here for this.

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Speaker 1: But he's also like, man, if I'm not president, they

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Speaker 1: might be able to take me to court. Right. And

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Speaker 1: there's also the fact that, like the the game part

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Speaker 1: of politics has started with the election, and so he

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Speaker 1: is probably like all he cares about is winning and

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Speaker 1: vanquishing his opponents. Um, yeah, I don't know. Man. Ivanka,

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Speaker 1: If you're out there, I know you're a fan of

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Speaker 1: the show. Haven't talk with your dad. He you're the

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Speaker 1: only person he cares about it. Come on the show. Also, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: come on, White, what what are you afraid of? We hello,

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Speaker 1: we went to history class together when you are a sophomore. Yeah? Really, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I know what you used to look like. Uh, I'm

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Speaker 1: not gonna be messy but very pretty. You alluded to

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Speaker 1: a mess which we like. That's called restraining diplomacy. Yes,

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Speaker 1: but please come on the show. You know, you know

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Speaker 1: it's better for the country for you to come on

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Speaker 1: the show and also to no longer be the president. Yeah. Anyways,

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Speaker 1: I think those are the things we're going to talk

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Speaker 1: about on this Those aren't the only things that are trending. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: those are the thing we randomly selected to talk about.

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Speaker 1: We are going to uh bid you ad and we

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Speaker 1: will be back tomorrow with the whole new podcast. We'll

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Speaker 1: talk you do. Bye bye bye. M