1 00:00:00,400 --> 00:00:02,800 Speaker 1: Welcome to Bombing with Eric Andre, the podcast where I 2 00:00:02,800 --> 00:00:05,360 Speaker 1: talk with friends, comedians, musicians, and other creative people about 3 00:00:05,360 --> 00:00:08,320 Speaker 1: their worst moments on stage and being blitz beyond belief. 4 00:00:08,600 --> 00:00:13,240 Speaker 1: This week's guest is Filippe A Sparza, comedian extraordinaire. He 5 00:00:13,320 --> 00:00:15,440 Speaker 1: talks about doing stand up all over the country and 6 00:00:15,480 --> 00:00:18,200 Speaker 1: a near death experience involving an unruly heckler and a 7 00:00:18,239 --> 00:00:21,400 Speaker 1: beer bottle. Also, Felipe will be part of the Impractical 8 00:00:21,520 --> 00:00:23,840 Speaker 1: Jokers eric Andre get ship Face. 9 00:00:23,720 --> 00:00:26,960 Speaker 2: Cruise this upcoming January along with Steve O. 10 00:00:27,280 --> 00:00:29,520 Speaker 1: Subscribe to the podcast to get a new episode every week, 11 00:00:29,600 --> 00:00:32,120 Speaker 1: rated five stars, and if you're on Apple Podcasts, you 12 00:00:32,120 --> 00:00:34,000 Speaker 1: could subscribe to a Big Oney Players Diamond to get 13 00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:36,599 Speaker 1: an exclusive clip from my hang with Felipe A Sparza, 14 00:00:36,680 --> 00:00:38,080 Speaker 1: plus adfree episodes every week. 15 00:00:38,159 --> 00:00:38,880 Speaker 2: Let's get into. 16 00:00:38,800 --> 00:00:42,680 Speaker 3: It, Oh, Bombing. 17 00:00:46,200 --> 00:00:51,400 Speaker 2: Balming with Eric Andre, Felipe A Sparza. What's up? The man, 18 00:00:51,680 --> 00:00:54,600 Speaker 2: the myth, the legend, the sex symbol? 19 00:00:54,720 --> 00:00:55,160 Speaker 3: What's up? 20 00:00:55,200 --> 00:00:58,800 Speaker 2: Everybody? Everybody confuses him for Benicio del Toro. I said, 21 00:00:58,880 --> 00:00:59,240 Speaker 2: no man. 22 00:00:59,320 --> 00:01:04,520 Speaker 1: Felipe's more handsome, has more Oscars, more Emmys, more Golden 23 00:01:04,560 --> 00:01:12,200 Speaker 1: globes than Benicio and Mark Anthony and Danny Trio combined. 24 00:01:13,200 --> 00:01:17,080 Speaker 2: I love it, man, Can we say that? All right? 25 00:01:17,120 --> 00:01:20,440 Speaker 2: So I got a new podcast. Man, It's called Bombing Bombing. 26 00:01:21,040 --> 00:01:24,119 Speaker 1: I just asked people what the shittiest gig, the worst 27 00:01:24,160 --> 00:01:25,240 Speaker 1: they've ever bombed? 28 00:01:25,720 --> 00:01:26,000 Speaker 2: Ever? 29 00:01:26,400 --> 00:01:29,200 Speaker 1: What that story is? It can be the worst bomb 30 00:01:29,240 --> 00:01:32,360 Speaker 1: you've ever done, the worst you've ever seen that you 31 00:01:32,400 --> 00:01:34,160 Speaker 1: weren't a part of, just the worst bomb you've ever seen, 32 00:01:34,600 --> 00:01:39,440 Speaker 1: and also the most wasted you've ever been on stage, 33 00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:42,679 Speaker 1: like back in the day when you were like the 34 00:01:42,720 --> 00:01:45,360 Speaker 1: movie train Spotting Times New jack. 35 00:01:45,200 --> 00:01:46,840 Speaker 3: City Times. 36 00:01:48,160 --> 00:01:49,280 Speaker 2: From New jer City. 37 00:01:49,680 --> 00:01:52,040 Speaker 1: But okay, what's the worst bomb you think you ever 38 00:01:52,240 --> 00:01:54,520 Speaker 1: the most you've ever like fell on your face on stage? 39 00:01:54,680 --> 00:02:01,360 Speaker 2: Me? Ah, man, I bombed like where hard ones in 40 00:02:01,440 --> 00:02:04,000 Speaker 2: the beginning, you know when like when you're out there 41 00:02:04,040 --> 00:02:06,760 Speaker 2: with a bunch of your comedy friends and everybody's on 42 00:02:06,800 --> 00:02:10,520 Speaker 2: the show, everybody's getting paid like forty dollars. I guess 43 00:02:10,560 --> 00:02:16,000 Speaker 2: probably in Sam pedro at the Sheraton Hotel bar. Yeah, 44 00:02:16,600 --> 00:02:18,920 Speaker 2: they had a bar. It was called a shark Tank. 45 00:02:18,960 --> 00:02:20,399 Speaker 2: I think I don't know the color of the bar, 46 00:02:21,360 --> 00:02:25,080 Speaker 2: like it's it's San pedro Let's California. Oh, that's not Texas, 47 00:02:25,320 --> 00:02:28,600 Speaker 2: No San Piedro, California, by the other side of Long Beach. 48 00:02:28,880 --> 00:02:28,960 Speaker 3: There. 49 00:02:29,120 --> 00:02:31,920 Speaker 2: First of all, there was a big ship above the stage, 50 00:02:32,320 --> 00:02:35,680 Speaker 2: because it's like it's like a ship, like a pirate ship, ship, 51 00:02:35,760 --> 00:02:39,960 Speaker 2: pirates ship, a ship. Kid just hanging and everybody bombing 52 00:02:40,040 --> 00:02:43,200 Speaker 2: like the host every comedian bomb is it packed a 53 00:02:43,200 --> 00:02:47,400 Speaker 2: big audience? Yeah, like sixty people scattered, not paying attention. 54 00:02:47,520 --> 00:02:51,120 Speaker 2: They're bombing. Everybody's bombing, doing hard, and I'm gonna backboard 55 00:02:51,160 --> 00:02:58,840 Speaker 2: many suck the one hither right, hit Long Beach early day. Yeah, 56 00:02:58,840 --> 00:03:01,880 Speaker 2: they're not really hit the hit the seven ten north, 57 00:03:05,320 --> 00:03:07,560 Speaker 2: then I already get on a six or five north, 58 00:03:07,600 --> 00:03:12,120 Speaker 2: then hit the five North and make it to Hollywood stuck. 59 00:03:12,480 --> 00:03:15,239 Speaker 2: And a lot of us have part time jobs too. 60 00:03:15,680 --> 00:03:18,239 Speaker 2: But I went up there and I bombed too. Yeah. 61 00:03:18,800 --> 00:03:19,480 Speaker 3: What was it like? 62 00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:22,960 Speaker 2: I would considered a bomb because I recovered bro good 63 00:03:22,960 --> 00:03:25,560 Speaker 2: at the end. Yeah, Yeah, because I was honest. No, 64 00:03:25,760 --> 00:03:28,280 Speaker 2: you told me your worst bomb. That's not the story 65 00:03:28,680 --> 00:03:29,320 Speaker 2: I know, man. 66 00:03:29,400 --> 00:03:32,720 Speaker 1: You gotta tell me the story of the tonguean dude 67 00:03:32,760 --> 00:03:33,280 Speaker 1: that was going to. 68 00:03:33,360 --> 00:03:35,760 Speaker 2: Kill you if I wasn't really bombing that one. 69 00:03:35,880 --> 00:03:37,600 Speaker 1: Okay, but you got to tell that story if you 70 00:03:37,640 --> 00:03:39,680 Speaker 1: don't mind talk topped about him as. 71 00:03:39,600 --> 00:03:43,320 Speaker 2: If my friend now joyed Verdina. He's a comedian. This 72 00:03:43,440 --> 00:03:48,640 Speaker 2: guy's an ex boxer, a professional boxer, ex police officer 73 00:03:48,720 --> 00:03:53,360 Speaker 2: in Tucson. Now he's a film director and he put 74 00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:56,760 Speaker 2: me in the first film El Matador, a man stretching 75 00:03:56,840 --> 00:04:03,120 Speaker 2: for his bows at the title and a match of 76 00:04:03,480 --> 00:04:06,800 Speaker 2: our man searching for his boss, and he put me 77 00:04:06,840 --> 00:04:09,480 Speaker 2: in it. He and this guy always had like a 78 00:04:09,520 --> 00:04:11,160 Speaker 2: way to make money when he got to our leg. 79 00:04:11,240 --> 00:04:13,400 Speaker 2: You know, he had a hustle that he made his 80 00:04:13,440 --> 00:04:17,880 Speaker 2: own his own karate dumble tape off defence it sold 81 00:04:17,880 --> 00:04:21,160 Speaker 2: it to people. Wow, that's incredible. So he's me up beef, 82 00:04:21,400 --> 00:04:23,320 Speaker 2: but you want to make a hundred dollars? I said, yes, 83 00:04:23,360 --> 00:04:31,520 Speaker 2: I do. Thursday Night at at the Roadhouse Cafe in Wilmington, California. Yeah, 84 00:04:31,560 --> 00:04:32,960 Speaker 2: And after the name of it was just got a 85 00:04:33,040 --> 00:04:35,680 Speaker 2: roadhouse cafe. Nothing to do with a movie, it's just 86 00:04:35,680 --> 00:04:38,320 Speaker 2: the cafe. And when we get there, she's a promoter. 87 00:04:38,520 --> 00:04:41,480 Speaker 2: I gather we knew alreadys and this guy's like a 88 00:04:41,680 --> 00:04:44,960 Speaker 2: specific islander, but not not some in her tongue in 89 00:04:45,200 --> 00:04:48,880 Speaker 2: just specific calendar or Filipino. We worked with him before. 90 00:04:49,279 --> 00:04:54,320 Speaker 2: So there's like a big somehoeing birthday party, right and 91 00:04:55,480 --> 00:04:58,000 Speaker 2: they're they're singing, they're having a good time. They're high 92 00:04:58,040 --> 00:05:01,040 Speaker 2: five in each other and they all like linebackers too. 93 00:05:01,279 --> 00:05:05,960 Speaker 2: They're giants. They're giant. And they stopped the karaoke that 94 00:05:06,040 --> 00:05:09,320 Speaker 2: were doing to start the comedy show. Hey, surprise comedy show. 95 00:05:09,520 --> 00:05:10,120 Speaker 3: That's always bad. 96 00:05:10,760 --> 00:05:14,240 Speaker 2: So the host bring me up first and then and 97 00:05:14,279 --> 00:05:17,760 Speaker 2: then I'm up there, man, doing my thing and nothing 98 00:05:17,839 --> 00:05:23,760 Speaker 2: man like there you can slowly start hearing and you know, man, 99 00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:29,000 Speaker 2: it's like when when bombing feels like man, when you 100 00:05:29,040 --> 00:05:41,599 Speaker 2: set your alarm to slowly start like. So they cut 101 00:05:41,640 --> 00:05:44,480 Speaker 2: off the karaoke and they start and you go up. 102 00:05:44,520 --> 00:05:47,719 Speaker 2: Do you go up to like just nothing music? You know? 103 00:05:47,760 --> 00:05:50,840 Speaker 2: The host that was holing a karaoke turn, he had 104 00:05:50,839 --> 00:05:53,080 Speaker 2: to do comedy in that for about an hour. So 105 00:05:53,160 --> 00:05:56,760 Speaker 2: you Philippe Sparsa and I'm up there and and then 106 00:05:56,960 --> 00:06:00,920 Speaker 2: the some moment, I tart you like, fuck mexic goods 107 00:06:02,160 --> 00:06:10,360 Speaker 2: right away, what the fuck? Fuck Mexicos, fuck Mexicans. And 108 00:06:11,800 --> 00:06:15,480 Speaker 2: I said, come on bro, no color lines, no color lines. 109 00:06:16,320 --> 00:06:20,360 Speaker 2: Can we all just get along? Then everybody start laughing, Bro, 110 00:06:21,320 --> 00:06:25,200 Speaker 2: everybody start laughing. Then he goes, what happened, man? I 111 00:06:25,240 --> 00:06:28,920 Speaker 2: know there was karaoke here? Boo, how about this, man, 112 00:06:29,400 --> 00:06:31,760 Speaker 2: we should just bring back karaoke. You want to sing, 113 00:06:32,560 --> 00:06:34,839 Speaker 2: let's you want to sing a JETS song? Right, that's 114 00:06:34,880 --> 00:06:36,440 Speaker 2: your people write a Jets. 115 00:06:36,120 --> 00:06:40,640 Speaker 1: Songs, Jets like the tongue in like. 116 00:06:41,720 --> 00:06:44,360 Speaker 2: Jets is a tongue in band, and they have a 117 00:06:44,400 --> 00:06:49,559 Speaker 2: song that sounds exactly like one of Selena's songs. Yeah, 118 00:06:49,960 --> 00:06:54,760 Speaker 2: I mean, I mean no, mas. He goes, I can't confused. 119 00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:56,760 Speaker 2: I can't do both of them without getting confused with 120 00:06:56,800 --> 00:06:58,919 Speaker 2: the other one. And then I went on a rabbit 121 00:06:58,960 --> 00:07:02,600 Speaker 2: hole once and the author of both songs had offered 122 00:07:03,200 --> 00:07:05,520 Speaker 2: both the songs at the same time, and he just 123 00:07:05,640 --> 00:07:09,520 Speaker 2: plaited it. Oh wow, so it was okay, So you said, 124 00:07:09,600 --> 00:07:15,760 Speaker 2: I'm good fall in love again? That's Alena song, but 125 00:07:15,800 --> 00:07:19,760 Speaker 2: the other one is I don't know, but similar rich Regardless, 126 00:07:20,120 --> 00:07:23,480 Speaker 2: these people are also moing man like saying, let's play a 127 00:07:23,520 --> 00:07:27,320 Speaker 2: Starvadorian song to a bunch of Mexicans, bro, And they 128 00:07:27,360 --> 00:07:29,960 Speaker 2: tell you how fuck you said out there, you know, 129 00:07:30,480 --> 00:07:33,680 Speaker 2: with a derogatory for Stardian. They call each other said 130 00:07:33,680 --> 00:07:37,239 Speaker 2: out there, which means shipthead. But to each other, it's cool, 131 00:07:37,320 --> 00:07:43,480 Speaker 2: you know. But if a Mexican called another of sarar 132 00:07:43,560 --> 00:07:46,280 Speaker 2: door said out there, like call him the N word, 133 00:07:48,760 --> 00:07:52,080 Speaker 2: I don't know how the tone changes. Okay, So they 134 00:07:52,280 --> 00:07:54,560 Speaker 2: that the equivalent of a tongue in and some moments, 135 00:07:54,720 --> 00:07:57,000 Speaker 2: so I went to the one I yellow a tongue. 136 00:07:57,680 --> 00:08:01,880 Speaker 2: Let's have a jet song. It was like, let's play 137 00:08:01,920 --> 00:08:06,120 Speaker 2: a let's let's play some Sodan songs. Let's bring it 138 00:08:06,240 --> 00:08:12,000 Speaker 2: the Smoduran soccer team. But they they the audience took 139 00:08:12,040 --> 00:08:15,400 Speaker 2: it at this guy has balls, you know, like to 140 00:08:15,520 --> 00:08:19,239 Speaker 2: throw that out there. So they all laughed. They all laughed, 141 00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:24,520 Speaker 2: except that guy didn't laugh. Yeah, and then he threw 142 00:08:24,520 --> 00:08:29,560 Speaker 2: a bottle at me. Oh my god, I love that 143 00:08:29,600 --> 00:08:32,320 Speaker 2: you didn't lead with this story. He threw a bottle 144 00:08:32,360 --> 00:08:35,720 Speaker 2: at me, like a Corona bottle. And then and then 145 00:08:35,800 --> 00:08:39,000 Speaker 2: now he missed me. And then I said, at least 146 00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:45,200 Speaker 2: it was a Mexican beer, y, but just take any matter. 147 00:08:44,800 --> 00:08:48,319 Speaker 2: And I'm not his group and laughing. But they're laughing 148 00:08:48,360 --> 00:08:51,080 Speaker 2: at him, not the joke, and they're laughing at the 149 00:08:51,080 --> 00:08:55,280 Speaker 2: whole situation. And so they kicked the through out the show, right, 150 00:08:55,280 --> 00:08:57,560 Speaker 2: they kick him out of the show, and I don't 151 00:08:57,559 --> 00:09:01,400 Speaker 2: know where he went. The show continued, I guess, so 152 00:09:01,480 --> 00:09:06,760 Speaker 2: now I'm bombing tension. You continued your set after the bottle, 153 00:09:07,360 --> 00:09:12,240 Speaker 2: keep going. I had to earn one hundred dollars. So 154 00:09:12,480 --> 00:09:14,520 Speaker 2: he throws a ball at you, all this commissions that 155 00:09:14,640 --> 00:09:16,360 Speaker 2: you're just like, and the whole time, Hey, did you 156 00:09:16,400 --> 00:09:20,040 Speaker 2: guys get the new iPhone? I'm still gonna bring up 157 00:09:20,080 --> 00:09:25,280 Speaker 2: the headliner. I'm a feature bro. Imagine your head. You're 158 00:09:25,280 --> 00:09:28,480 Speaker 2: supposed to do forty five minutes after me, and I'm 159 00:09:28,520 --> 00:09:32,680 Speaker 2: sucking up the whole show. But shod at the next box. 160 00:09:32,840 --> 00:09:37,600 Speaker 2: Ray instigated ass beat there, so he's tough. So I said, man, 161 00:09:37,679 --> 00:09:40,280 Speaker 2: we're gonna we're gonna keep the show going. Man, what that? 162 00:09:40,440 --> 00:09:40,640 Speaker 3: Yeah? 163 00:09:40,720 --> 00:09:43,600 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah man. The last guy got kicked out. Man, 164 00:09:43,600 --> 00:09:45,000 Speaker 2: he's gonna I don't know where the hell you that, 165 00:09:45,080 --> 00:09:47,920 Speaker 2: but he's gone. But we're gonna pass We're gonna start 166 00:09:47,960 --> 00:09:51,880 Speaker 2: passing out lasting cups man, and everybody's gonna take it. 167 00:09:51,920 --> 00:09:54,800 Speaker 2: We're gonna take away all your bottles just case everybody 168 00:09:54,800 --> 00:09:58,520 Speaker 2: wants to throw more domestic beer at me. And then 169 00:09:59,760 --> 00:10:03,080 Speaker 2: it's so Joey Medina doesn't want to go up, you know, 170 00:10:03,640 --> 00:10:06,680 Speaker 2: he said, let's get the fuck out of here. Yeah, 171 00:10:07,240 --> 00:10:10,559 Speaker 2: so we go outside and that's the moment Man is 172 00:10:10,600 --> 00:10:13,600 Speaker 2: waiting for us with a knife in the parking lot. 173 00:10:13,760 --> 00:10:17,400 Speaker 2: Like he runs through the car where we're starting it right, 174 00:10:17,880 --> 00:10:20,079 Speaker 2: and then uh, he has he has like one of 175 00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:23,520 Speaker 2: those knives because you know, he's a he's a blue 176 00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:26,439 Speaker 2: he's a blue collar man, you know. And he gets 177 00:10:26,520 --> 00:10:28,200 Speaker 2: got too drunk and I don't know what was wrong, 178 00:10:28,520 --> 00:10:30,360 Speaker 2: had a bad day at work. He was he was 179 00:10:30,559 --> 00:10:32,880 Speaker 2: he had one of those knives. Had everything in there, bro, 180 00:10:33,400 --> 00:10:36,199 Speaker 2: He had one of those Swiss army knives. So he 181 00:10:36,240 --> 00:10:39,079 Speaker 2: had he was started stables, was a was the was 182 00:10:39,120 --> 00:10:42,920 Speaker 2: the one to open the wine bottle against He was 183 00:10:42,960 --> 00:10:44,679 Speaker 2: too drunk to take out the knives, so he took 184 00:10:44,679 --> 00:10:48,719 Speaker 2: out the corks crew. It was a Swiss knife. He 185 00:10:48,840 --> 00:10:51,360 Speaker 2: was too fund up, one of those Swiss knife. Bro. 186 00:10:51,920 --> 00:10:54,400 Speaker 2: He had an oar for his boat and everything. Bro, 187 00:10:56,880 --> 00:11:01,920 Speaker 2: He's just dark. He hit a Swiss army someone did 188 00:11:01,920 --> 00:11:04,760 Speaker 2: he was? He in the car? 189 00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:06,560 Speaker 1: But was he trying to put his fist through the 190 00:11:06,559 --> 00:11:07,000 Speaker 1: window to. 191 00:11:07,120 --> 00:11:09,920 Speaker 2: The window man that he was shaking the car bro 192 00:11:10,080 --> 00:11:13,880 Speaker 2: like like he was a chi Rex bro Jurassic parked 193 00:11:13,880 --> 00:11:16,760 Speaker 2: the right. Oh my lord, he was a giant, giant. 194 00:11:16,800 --> 00:11:17,160 Speaker 3: We are you guy? 195 00:11:17,240 --> 00:11:21,600 Speaker 2: Scared? He was giant for a person who's six two, 196 00:11:21,679 --> 00:11:24,760 Speaker 2: but not compared to everybody was there six five, four hundred, 197 00:11:24,800 --> 00:11:28,319 Speaker 2: three hundred pounds of muscle. He was like in shape agains. 198 00:11:28,320 --> 00:11:33,680 Speaker 2: He didn't have that beaties, but he was man. He 199 00:11:33,920 --> 00:11:37,200 Speaker 2: was shaking the car. But it was funny, was that 200 00:11:37,880 --> 00:11:42,000 Speaker 2: when he threw the bottle and his friends calmed him 201 00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:46,920 Speaker 2: down and they got kicked. They got kicked out. Fucking this. 202 00:11:47,120 --> 00:11:50,600 Speaker 2: Someone woman walks out to me, do you do birthday parties? 203 00:11:50,920 --> 00:11:58,360 Speaker 2: House parties? Sure, lady with Andre. 204 00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:07,760 Speaker 3: With aeric Andre? 205 00:12:08,280 --> 00:12:11,240 Speaker 2: Why bomb back to back in two shows? And I'm 206 00:12:11,240 --> 00:12:16,400 Speaker 2: Hawaii and Tacoma, Washington. Yeah, Hawaii. But a people are 207 00:12:16,440 --> 00:12:19,560 Speaker 2: threatening you throwing bottles now, man, they threatened me with 208 00:12:19,640 --> 00:12:24,679 Speaker 2: no laughs. My friend used to be a comedian from 209 00:12:24,720 --> 00:12:28,000 Speaker 2: the Comedy Act Theater and I had a room in Montebello. 210 00:12:28,280 --> 00:12:31,400 Speaker 2: His name was one Dexter. I think it was like 211 00:12:31,440 --> 00:12:34,880 Speaker 2: a part time substitute teacher at a comedy comedian One 212 00:12:34,960 --> 00:12:40,559 Speaker 2: Dexter from Houston, Texas. But he knew a guy that 213 00:12:40,559 --> 00:12:44,600 Speaker 2: that booked a room in Hawaii and then Tacoma, Washington, 214 00:12:44,720 --> 00:12:48,400 Speaker 2: back to back. It paid seven hundred dollars fly the 215 00:12:48,559 --> 00:12:53,120 Speaker 2: fly you in the night before Hawaii. We spent like 216 00:12:53,120 --> 00:12:55,400 Speaker 2: an all day in Hawaii hanging out at at eight o'clock. 217 00:12:55,440 --> 00:12:57,960 Speaker 2: You do the show the next day. You fly the 218 00:12:58,000 --> 00:13:01,280 Speaker 2: Tacoma and you do the show the next day in Takoma. 219 00:13:01,400 --> 00:13:04,560 Speaker 2: So man, they flew me out and I'm like, fuck, 220 00:13:04,600 --> 00:13:06,720 Speaker 2: I never bit to Hawaii. I'm super excited. 221 00:13:06,840 --> 00:13:07,080 Speaker 3: Man. 222 00:13:07,559 --> 00:13:10,520 Speaker 2: I was staying at the out Rigor, but I found 223 00:13:10,520 --> 00:13:13,079 Speaker 2: out they were on their own name out Rigger and 224 00:13:13,840 --> 00:13:17,640 Speaker 2: Outrigger Hotel and I hang out in Hawaii. Never been 225 00:13:17,679 --> 00:13:21,840 Speaker 2: to Hawaii. Man, I was like, wow, I very happy. Yeah, 226 00:13:21,960 --> 00:13:25,240 Speaker 2: but here comes the show man. Never been on it 227 00:13:25,320 --> 00:13:28,240 Speaker 2: and I only have like one TV credit Showtime Latino 228 00:13:28,320 --> 00:13:32,120 Speaker 2: LaughFest of a hotel by Para Driguez on nineteen ninety 229 00:13:32,120 --> 00:13:37,200 Speaker 2: six on Showtime. Nobody saw it, and so they booked 230 00:13:37,200 --> 00:13:40,200 Speaker 2: me based on that. There was only fourteen people in 231 00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:44,319 Speaker 2: the audience, and the promoter was there because he heard 232 00:13:44,360 --> 00:13:47,280 Speaker 2: that was funny. So he never shows up. He shows 233 00:13:47,360 --> 00:13:50,000 Speaker 2: up and the other broken leg and he puts his 234 00:13:50,080 --> 00:13:52,720 Speaker 2: leg on top of the table. He's there with his girlfriend. 235 00:13:53,320 --> 00:13:56,880 Speaker 2: Fourteen people. I had to do an hour host bomb 236 00:13:57,480 --> 00:14:01,480 Speaker 2: feature guy bomb but nobody was threatning, right, but we 237 00:14:01,760 --> 00:14:06,000 Speaker 2: bombed bro Then I bomb, like no laughs, fourteen one 238 00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:12,840 Speaker 2: hour cal look at the promoter. Man, sorry, man, sorry, 239 00:14:13,040 --> 00:14:15,760 Speaker 2: what are you mad? What do you doing? You bomb? 240 00:14:15,960 --> 00:14:18,040 Speaker 2: How do you recover? I don't know how to recover. 241 00:14:19,680 --> 00:14:21,200 Speaker 2: I had an hour mature. I don't even know I 242 00:14:21,240 --> 00:14:23,400 Speaker 2: had an hour matural. Maybe I was twenty minutes of matural, 243 00:14:23,480 --> 00:14:27,680 Speaker 2: but it went by past. My mom got dry, so 244 00:14:27,720 --> 00:14:29,680 Speaker 2: you just gotta try to get nervous. It was bombing 245 00:14:29,720 --> 00:14:32,160 Speaker 2: like I felt like I never bombed at that before 246 00:14:32,160 --> 00:14:35,440 Speaker 2: because I felt like like I had an outer body 247 00:14:35,480 --> 00:14:39,520 Speaker 2: experience where my my my body was sat down. I 248 00:14:39,560 --> 00:14:46,960 Speaker 2: watched me bomb, just taking his head. So that was done. 249 00:14:47,840 --> 00:14:51,520 Speaker 2: I go back to the hotel and the guy said, manes, 250 00:14:51,560 --> 00:14:54,200 Speaker 2: I'm gonna pay. I'm gonna pay in the morning. Your money, why, 251 00:14:54,240 --> 00:14:57,880 Speaker 2: that's seven hundred dollars. So in the morning, I'm hanging 252 00:14:57,920 --> 00:15:01,600 Speaker 2: out with his boys and let's flights are really late, Like, 253 00:15:01,680 --> 00:15:03,920 Speaker 2: oh man, the flight's gonna leave like an hour and 254 00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:07,480 Speaker 2: a half. I kept trying the promoter man. Yeah, married, 255 00:15:07,960 --> 00:15:10,800 Speaker 2: my boys will take you. Anyways. They took me to 256 00:15:10,920 --> 00:15:15,280 Speaker 2: the airport late, so I missed my flight, right, So 257 00:15:15,320 --> 00:15:17,920 Speaker 2: I told the guy, man, your boy dropped me off 258 00:15:17,920 --> 00:15:20,640 Speaker 2: at the airport late. I missed my flight. What am 259 00:15:20,680 --> 00:15:23,840 Speaker 2: I gonna do? Tell him that you have an emergency. 260 00:15:23,960 --> 00:15:26,720 Speaker 2: You need to get back to the LA or whatever 261 00:15:27,200 --> 00:15:30,560 Speaker 2: to Tacoma. So that's how they left me with, like 262 00:15:30,880 --> 00:15:35,000 Speaker 2: you figured out yourself basically, So I just took I 263 00:15:35,040 --> 00:15:39,120 Speaker 2: took a later flight. Oh yeah, paid me two hundred 264 00:15:39,240 --> 00:15:41,200 Speaker 2: right there. I don't know, mother, but I used those 265 00:15:41,200 --> 00:15:45,000 Speaker 2: two hundred to get that flight, the later flight, so 266 00:15:45,080 --> 00:15:47,440 Speaker 2: you made zero. Yeah, So I took a two hundred 267 00:15:47,440 --> 00:15:48,880 Speaker 2: dollars they gave me, or they're gonna give me the 268 00:15:48,920 --> 00:15:53,800 Speaker 2: five hundred Tacoma to lay right. So I waited in 269 00:15:53,920 --> 00:15:57,160 Speaker 2: LA for an hour and for like nine eight hours 270 00:15:57,440 --> 00:16:00,280 Speaker 2: for the next flight to Tacoma. I took a another 271 00:16:00,280 --> 00:16:02,960 Speaker 2: one hundred on my TM and I paid a hundred 272 00:16:03,040 --> 00:16:06,920 Speaker 2: for that flight to get to Takoma. So when I 273 00:16:06,960 --> 00:16:10,040 Speaker 2: get to Tacoma, they picked me up at the airport. 274 00:16:10,480 --> 00:16:12,400 Speaker 2: This black dude who looked like a tiger woods. Really 275 00:16:12,480 --> 00:16:15,560 Speaker 2: nice guy. But I couldn't even find him. First of all, 276 00:16:15,880 --> 00:16:17,600 Speaker 2: my first time in Hawaii, I thought it was gonna 277 00:16:17,640 --> 00:16:19,240 Speaker 2: be like, you know, like the like in a movie, 278 00:16:19,240 --> 00:16:22,200 Speaker 2: they gave you a lay back. Then it was just 279 00:16:22,600 --> 00:16:25,960 Speaker 2: some brother from Memphis. He was smoking a Newport in 280 00:16:26,040 --> 00:16:28,880 Speaker 2: the airport, bro like, he didn't give a fuck. You're 281 00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:33,479 Speaker 2: my man, use a comedian they called Forelipe. I said, yeah, 282 00:16:33,520 --> 00:16:36,840 Speaker 2: and he's him, and I took off. Nice guy. I 283 00:16:36,840 --> 00:16:39,720 Speaker 2: think it was a pimp because he kept talking about 284 00:16:39,720 --> 00:16:42,960 Speaker 2: how that pitch maybe made me no money. That bitch 285 00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:45,120 Speaker 2: coped me a airplight, take you a bus trip, bade 286 00:16:45,160 --> 00:16:47,280 Speaker 2: me no money. He just kept saying that over and 287 00:16:47,280 --> 00:16:52,280 Speaker 2: over on the phone with somebody, pitch made me no money. 288 00:16:52,640 --> 00:16:54,800 Speaker 2: He took me to go eat right away, immediately took 289 00:16:54,840 --> 00:16:57,840 Speaker 2: me to eat at a restaurant, and then he was 290 00:16:57,880 --> 00:17:00,000 Speaker 2: like my escort. She would have drove me to the airport. 291 00:17:00,920 --> 00:17:03,320 Speaker 2: But so when I get to Tacoma, I get picked 292 00:17:03,360 --> 00:17:06,159 Speaker 2: up by another handler, another guy, and he takes me 293 00:17:06,200 --> 00:17:09,680 Speaker 2: to the promoters guy's house and his mom is like 294 00:17:09,760 --> 00:17:12,960 Speaker 2: the late black lady and he goes, hi, hi, man, 295 00:17:13,320 --> 00:17:17,520 Speaker 2: I always cook lunch for other comedians, and I'm like, 296 00:17:19,160 --> 00:17:24,520 Speaker 2: I'm in the hood. Bro the hood, and so she 297 00:17:24,600 --> 00:17:29,040 Speaker 2: gives me mac and cheese, and it's like and like 298 00:17:29,480 --> 00:17:31,600 Speaker 2: she didn't even mac and cheap, but like, I guess 299 00:17:31,600 --> 00:17:33,240 Speaker 2: you made it. In the morning, I go to the 300 00:17:33,280 --> 00:17:37,520 Speaker 2: show and so the whole show Bro is black people 301 00:17:37,560 --> 00:17:44,440 Speaker 2: inside some now some white. That show was like they 302 00:17:44,520 --> 00:17:47,480 Speaker 2: brought up half of the town probably were not before me, Bro, 303 00:17:49,160 --> 00:17:53,960 Speaker 2: So like seventy. They put up a rapper, They brought 304 00:17:54,119 --> 00:17:58,880 Speaker 2: this woman to do a poem. Oh boy, this guy 305 00:17:59,040 --> 00:18:02,159 Speaker 2: painted I get. I don't know what he did. Then 306 00:18:02,200 --> 00:18:04,560 Speaker 2: they brought up a local comedian who won the contest, 307 00:18:05,280 --> 00:18:09,680 Speaker 2: and his che destroyed Bro before me. All his jokes 308 00:18:10,440 --> 00:18:13,480 Speaker 2: were references of people down the street that he knows, 309 00:18:13,680 --> 00:18:19,720 Speaker 2: and everybody knew him too. So are y'all know Pooky right? Everybody? Oh, 310 00:18:19,920 --> 00:18:23,680 Speaker 2: I'll know this, but yeah yeah, And now y'all know Mouck. 311 00:18:23,920 --> 00:18:24,480 Speaker 3: Yeah. 312 00:18:24,520 --> 00:18:28,640 Speaker 2: And then they bring me up Bro, and man, nothing 313 00:18:28,720 --> 00:18:33,760 Speaker 2: Bro like crickets crick is Bro, crick is dog. Then 314 00:18:33,760 --> 00:18:36,440 Speaker 2: they get more mad when I said that Chris Rock 315 00:18:36,520 --> 00:18:39,480 Speaker 2: was right. Man, there's black people. Then there's you guys 316 00:18:39,520 --> 00:18:49,760 Speaker 2: here right, fuck you motherfucker. And then and then this 317 00:18:49,880 --> 00:18:54,119 Speaker 2: guy this is how bad it was? How bad I'm bothering. 318 00:18:54,160 --> 00:18:57,520 Speaker 2: It was. I was bowing so bad. There's somebody from 319 00:18:57,560 --> 00:19:01,119 Speaker 2: the floor road took it in my pants. Yeah, like 320 00:19:01,400 --> 00:19:07,240 Speaker 2: pulling you up the word. Then I tried to throw 321 00:19:07,720 --> 00:19:10,679 Speaker 2: I'll try to roast somebody. Was a funny roast I 322 00:19:10,720 --> 00:19:13,959 Speaker 2: heard on BT and you I heard that she had 323 00:19:14,040 --> 00:19:18,280 Speaker 2: bet in my lap and then that food went up 324 00:19:18,280 --> 00:19:20,760 Speaker 2: there to have a roast battle with me on stage. 325 00:19:22,160 --> 00:19:24,480 Speaker 2: One of the people on as you were as you 326 00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:29,719 Speaker 2: were bombing, Yeah, I can nothing, I said, yeah, mid set, bro, 327 00:19:29,800 --> 00:19:34,800 Speaker 2: we have a roast battle without me asking him across 328 00:19:34,920 --> 00:19:38,920 Speaker 2: chaotic already the audience and all my jokes are were 329 00:19:38,960 --> 00:19:40,919 Speaker 2: now hitting the people because they were all like, I 330 00:19:40,920 --> 00:19:43,600 Speaker 2: guess jokes that's only funny. I like they were telling 331 00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:46,240 Speaker 2: each other that I guess because I said, because I 332 00:19:46,440 --> 00:19:50,919 Speaker 2: was wearing like those shoes with no socks again loafers 333 00:19:51,920 --> 00:19:54,320 Speaker 2: like I was dressed real nice, but you need a 334 00:19:54,320 --> 00:19:57,920 Speaker 2: lot of lotion of ankles, you know. And I said, damn, man, 335 00:19:57,960 --> 00:19:59,520 Speaker 2: when you make piecea up, but you're gonna make it 336 00:19:59,560 --> 00:20:03,240 Speaker 2: with your head now your feet, And I said, there's 337 00:20:03,240 --> 00:20:05,480 Speaker 2: full other toxic pizza of it with his feet and 338 00:20:05,560 --> 00:20:12,000 Speaker 2: ship nothing bro, nothing, just some people like I can't 339 00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:15,080 Speaker 2: hear like laughter but not enough. So then like I 340 00:20:15,119 --> 00:20:19,760 Speaker 2: walked off stage, boo, I walked off stage, and they 341 00:20:19,840 --> 00:20:22,200 Speaker 2: took me to start to the hotel, bro, like was 342 00:20:22,240 --> 00:20:24,719 Speaker 2: the escort and ship. It took me out of there, Bro, 343 00:20:24,840 --> 00:20:28,679 Speaker 2: like a president of a bout of you assassinated. Like 344 00:20:28,720 --> 00:20:31,720 Speaker 2: they opened every door in my head, like they rushed 345 00:20:31,800 --> 00:20:36,320 Speaker 2: out out of there. Brot here they were like when 346 00:20:36,320 --> 00:20:38,000 Speaker 2: they shot Reggin, Bro, Like you know, like. 347 00:20:42,240 --> 00:20:53,000 Speaker 3: With Aeric, Andre, with Aeric and Andre. 348 00:20:53,840 --> 00:20:55,560 Speaker 2: What's the worst bob you've ever seen? Have you ever 349 00:20:55,560 --> 00:20:57,879 Speaker 2: seen anybody? Have you ever seen fights on stage or 350 00:20:57,880 --> 00:20:59,800 Speaker 2: anybody else? Get the bottles thrown at them or anything 351 00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:01,720 Speaker 2: like that? Bro, I saw the worst bombing This guy 352 00:21:02,040 --> 00:21:04,680 Speaker 2: at a at one of the shows that I was on. 353 00:21:04,920 --> 00:21:07,680 Speaker 2: He had props first of all, and then he goes, 354 00:21:07,920 --> 00:21:12,800 Speaker 2: he tells this girl, hey, next time, if a peenus 355 00:21:12,920 --> 00:21:15,320 Speaker 2: is two dirty, wrap this around it? Right? Can he 356 00:21:15,400 --> 00:21:17,360 Speaker 2: throw that? I heard it hates to ride the head. 357 00:21:18,280 --> 00:21:20,280 Speaker 2: And then he leads to another lady goes, if you 358 00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:23,320 Speaker 2: get lonely, hey, sit on this. He throw the carrot 359 00:21:23,400 --> 00:21:28,000 Speaker 2: at her. What yeah, and what happened? Nobody laughing? Bro, 360 00:21:28,320 --> 00:21:31,520 Speaker 2: nobody laughing, and they what made it worse The host 361 00:21:32,119 --> 00:21:37,359 Speaker 2: went up there and destroyd with talking about him and 362 00:21:37,400 --> 00:21:40,640 Speaker 2: his props for like fifteen minutes, making fun of the guy. 363 00:21:40,720 --> 00:21:45,480 Speaker 2: Yeah this that he was saying, like, hey, normally I 364 00:21:45,520 --> 00:21:48,119 Speaker 2: would never see a comedian. It's not funny when I 365 00:21:48,119 --> 00:21:51,240 Speaker 2: host the show and come up here because everybody's trying. 366 00:21:52,119 --> 00:21:58,800 Speaker 2: But that guy fucking saw I got the worst comic commentator. 367 00:21:58,960 --> 00:22:02,720 Speaker 2: I mean that guy bad, Like how does he write 368 00:22:02,760 --> 00:22:05,439 Speaker 2: these fucking jokes? What does he do with it in 369 00:22:05,480 --> 00:22:09,840 Speaker 2: the morning? Smoke a joint, open the refrigerator? All right, 370 00:22:09,880 --> 00:22:15,840 Speaker 2: what's funny today? Sounds like jays Hackey nah to teas. 371 00:22:18,000 --> 00:22:20,320 Speaker 2: Have you ever seen any fights on stage? Yeah? Man, 372 00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:24,760 Speaker 2: yeah I saw No, I saw this comedian who and who? Normal? Who? 373 00:22:24,800 --> 00:22:27,560 Speaker 2: I never seen kill? Right? 374 00:22:28,440 --> 00:22:29,159 Speaker 3: He was. 375 00:22:29,359 --> 00:22:34,119 Speaker 2: It was in Bakersfield, California, and yeah man, and we 376 00:22:34,200 --> 00:22:38,360 Speaker 2: already went up on he was like the host, and 377 00:22:38,920 --> 00:22:43,360 Speaker 2: we heard like a commotion like yeah, and we were 378 00:22:43,400 --> 00:22:45,600 Speaker 2: there talking to a bunch of girls, and you know, 379 00:22:45,920 --> 00:22:49,040 Speaker 2: some people were smoking bud smoking cigarettes outside, but we 380 00:22:49,080 --> 00:22:52,800 Speaker 2: were Yeah, he goes and we were the fuck that 381 00:22:52,880 --> 00:22:58,520 Speaker 2: guy never kills he's killing him. Open the door. They're 382 00:22:58,640 --> 00:23:03,720 Speaker 2: just like six foot three hello, choking his ass broke. 383 00:23:05,040 --> 00:23:07,920 Speaker 2: They're like he's strangling him on the stage and half 384 00:23:07,960 --> 00:23:10,520 Speaker 2: of the audience is trying to get him off. But 385 00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:14,800 Speaker 2: everybody's going yeah, yeah. People are pumped because he was 386 00:23:14,840 --> 00:23:18,400 Speaker 2: so bad. It was bad side. So we were at 387 00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:22,840 Speaker 2: the Hill Cafe. Also shout out to the Cafe and 388 00:23:23,280 --> 00:23:26,439 Speaker 2: the big comedy club on Lancashire and Jack Junior and 389 00:23:27,240 --> 00:23:32,040 Speaker 2: Jack and big shoutout. It was his wife, Terry, big shoutout, 390 00:23:32,080 --> 00:23:35,639 Speaker 2: big shout out. I turned into a billiards club. I 391 00:23:35,680 --> 00:23:40,200 Speaker 2: don't care. I turned to a billiards club. Anyways, So 392 00:23:40,800 --> 00:23:43,440 Speaker 2: my friend bombed at the Hall Cafe and made a 393 00:23:43,480 --> 00:23:45,680 Speaker 2: big mistake. But a date and a day was hot 394 00:23:45,720 --> 00:23:50,320 Speaker 2: as hell. That's the worst, the worst. And then they 395 00:23:50,640 --> 00:23:54,400 Speaker 2: bring out her stay yeah, and then all the ugly 396 00:23:54,440 --> 00:23:59,879 Speaker 2: people around him were killing She said outside we're smoking 397 00:24:00,119 --> 00:24:04,560 Speaker 2: join He said, maybe enough for you. Oh he was 398 00:24:04,680 --> 00:24:07,640 Speaker 2: giving her shit for not laughing his day. Told here, oh, 399 00:24:07,720 --> 00:24:14,040 Speaker 2: maybe stand up isn't for you, Felipe. They try to 400 00:24:14,040 --> 00:24:16,520 Speaker 2: stop us, and we can't be stopped. They try, bro 401 00:24:16,800 --> 00:24:21,480 Speaker 2: They tried to build walls between us, but we built bridges. Hell. Yeah, man, 402 00:24:21,680 --> 00:24:24,040 Speaker 2: believe it. Thank you so much, Thank for having been 403 00:24:24,080 --> 00:24:26,800 Speaker 2: an honor and a pleasure. Always good seeing. 404 00:24:26,640 --> 00:24:30,920 Speaker 3: You with Eric and Andre. 405 00:24:31,280 --> 00:24:33,840 Speaker 1: Bombing with Eric Andres brought to you by Will Ferrell's 406 00:24:33,840 --> 00:24:37,320 Speaker 1: Big Money Players Network and iHeart Podcast. Executive produced by 407 00:24:37,359 --> 00:24:41,040 Speaker 1: Han Sani Olivia Aguilar, edited and sound designed by Andy Harris, 408 00:24:41,080 --> 00:24:43,440 Speaker 1: and our art is by Dylan Vanderberg. If you want 409 00:24:43,440 --> 00:24:45,320 Speaker 1: to confess to your own bombing moments or give us 410 00:24:45,320 --> 00:24:47,280 Speaker 1: a shout out, go rate us five stars and drop 411 00:24:47,320 --> 00:24:49,520 Speaker 1: a review on your podcast app a choice, write about 412 00:24:49,560 --> 00:24:52,159 Speaker 1: your own stories of bombing at life, and if you're 413 00:24:52,200 --> 00:24:54,520 Speaker 1: on Apple Podcasts, you could also subscribe to Big Money 414 00:24:54,560 --> 00:24:57,720 Speaker 1: Player's Diamond to get exclusive bonus content with every episode, 415 00:24:57,720 --> 00:24:59,320 Speaker 1: and listen to all my episodes at free. 416 00:24:59,640 --> 00:24:59,840 Speaker 3: Bye