Speaker 1: The Nicky Gliser Podcast.
Speaker 2: Nick Glaser pos here's Nikky.
Speaker 3: Hey everyone, welcome to the show. It's Snicky Glazer. It's
Speaker 3: Snecky Glazer Podcast. Sorry, I'm distracted. I am texting about
Speaker 3: a flight that my assistant needed a book cool cool issues.
Speaker 3: Hi everyone, I am back home in Saint Louis. I
Speaker 3: have wet hair. I just want to say, this is
Speaker 3: a wet hair pod. I didn't have time to get
Speaker 3: ready for this. Life is busy, and so if you
Speaker 3: want to see me with wet hair and see it
Speaker 3: get gradually dry over the course of the next hour,
Speaker 3: pop onto YouTube and check us out.
Speaker 4: I am in my studio with my two dogs.
Speaker 3: No one else is here, but Anya and Brian and
Speaker 3: Noah are all here.
Speaker 4: Hey, guys, how's it going.
Speaker 1: I thought you were.
Speaker 5: Referring to us as your dogs and I was with
Speaker 5: my dogs.
Speaker 6: Can I accept it dogs?
Speaker 1: I didn't think that. I assume she was talking about
Speaker 1: her real dogs. And I also want to answer the question.
Speaker 1: I'm doing fine, Thank you.
Speaker 3: I can't see you guys at all, because I guess
Speaker 3: my internet is not allowing me to see your video,
Speaker 3: so I'm just talking into the ether.
Speaker 4: But this is this is technology who gives us.
Speaker 3: And we just lost her time, but he'll be back.
Speaker 3: Don't worry about it. Anya, What are you up to
Speaker 3: this morning?
Speaker 4: What's going on?
Speaker 5: I've had a new friend. I had a meeting with
Speaker 5: a new friend. I met for someone for tea.
Speaker 6: She was a friend of my man.
Speaker 3: You guys ever calmed down? Anya, still to signor tea?
Speaker 3: It's still going on?
Speaker 4: Did you hear the length on tea?
Speaker 3: Did you go back and listen, Bessie's go and listen
Speaker 3: and hear the length on the word tea.
Speaker 6: It's because I love it so much.
Speaker 4: You wanted you're savoring it, even the word for tea.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I met someone for tea and on the way home,
Speaker 5: I was like, good job girl, because you don't take
Speaker 5: many risks in adult with new friends. And it was
Speaker 5: just nice that I said yes to that. We might
Speaker 5: be walking buddies. Is this me moving into my senior years?
Speaker 6: I don't know. We might go for a box together.
Speaker 3: That's nice. That's so fun. Can we ask how you
Speaker 3: met this friend? It was idea.
Speaker 6: It was just a woman I know.
Speaker 5: Was like, hey, I know someone that lives in Kingston
Speaker 5: and she's new in town, and and then we I
Speaker 5: was we were just texting and I was like, I
Speaker 5: live by this coffee shop and so we grabbed a tea.
Speaker 6: I was like, why not just say yes? It was nice?
Speaker 6: She was nice.
Speaker 4: Were you like ner of us going into it.
Speaker 6: A little bit? Yeah?
Speaker 5: I was like, I'm blonde and I have a bob
Speaker 5: and I'm horny. No, it was fine, but.
Speaker 3: It is always at awkward when you like first met
Speaker 3: I always like, that's always my Like when Brian was
Speaker 3: talking about going on a million dates on apps back
Speaker 3: in the day, I was always my first question to
Speaker 3: people who go on app dates. It's like, how awkward
Speaker 3: is that when you're looking for each other and you
Speaker 3: like first see each other and kind and go hey,
Speaker 3: and your eyebrows like raised like hey, yeah, Like.
Speaker 4: It's so awkward.
Speaker 3: I don't know why that part really gives me. As
Speaker 3: the kids say the ick, but it really does my
Speaker 3: whole It's what's would prevent me. Would I can't be
Speaker 3: single ever again because of that awkward The bell rings
Speaker 3: at the coffee shop you're going to and you like
Speaker 3: look over and there's just someone going like hey, I
Speaker 3: don't like it, and then the table approached, you have
Speaker 3: nothing to say to one another, and you just sit
Speaker 3: down and go like, like, what.
Speaker 4: Do you say?
Speaker 1: Sometimes it's the wrong person. Sometimes you look at someone
Speaker 1: you give them the nod and they're not there for
Speaker 1: the date. Oh, they're just there to go to get
Speaker 1: coffee for themselves.
Speaker 4: Why can normal people do this?
Speaker 3: And I can go on like and I can't, or
Speaker 3: I can and I have done it before, and so
Speaker 3: I'm not a complete I'm not talking from a place
Speaker 3: of complete like ignorance. But why can I go on
Speaker 3: stage for an hour and talk it to a microphone
Speaker 3: and have no problem with it and talk for hours?
Speaker 4: I could go longer and talk for hours.
Speaker 3: But I the idea of meeting with someone who you
Speaker 3: potentially could have sex with, and Anya, this is not
Speaker 3: the person that you just met with, but like too
Speaker 3: much on the table, man, I know why.
Speaker 5: I know why because we're in control on stage. It
Speaker 5: is not an egalitarian relationship. We have a little more
Speaker 5: power than the audience has, so we're comfortable. But in
Speaker 5: the other situation you're supposed to both kind of have
Speaker 5: roughly the same amount of power and it's just.
Speaker 4: A hard one.
Speaker 3: Then yes, that's you know, that's what Heckler's like, and
Speaker 3: comedians always say to Heckler's is like you bought you
Speaker 3: brought a knife to a gunfight, Like I have a microphone.
Speaker 4: Don't heard this?
Speaker 1: Yes, whenever you're on stage, at any point, you could
Speaker 1: just be like, I don't want to talk about this anymore,
Speaker 1: I want to talk about this, Or you could just
Speaker 1: start making fun of the person in front of you
Speaker 1: on a date. Those things won't work. You can't just
Speaker 1: be on a date and be like, I don't want
Speaker 1: to talk about squirrels anymore. I want to talk about You.
Speaker 3: Would do that, Brian, I'm done talking about this now.
Speaker 3: Please let's shift subjects.
Speaker 6: This is boring.
Speaker 1: Yeah, hey, where'd you get that shirt? Your piece of shit?
Speaker 1: Sometimes I'll do that.
Speaker 4: That's a good opener. You should write a book.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I am already figuring out ways for you to
Speaker 3: get out of this friendship.
Speaker 6: I knew you were going to say that, but I'm
Speaker 6: okay with it, because, like.
Speaker 3: You know, when people want to hang out and they
Speaker 3: you know, and you don't really want to, what do
Speaker 3: you do?
Speaker 6: I just am unavailable. But I told it.
Speaker 5: Here's why I'm proud of myself. I've made a strides
Speaker 5: in my life. First of all, I did not pay,
Speaker 5: which I think is is a progress for me because
Speaker 5: in the past it would have been like I got you,
Speaker 5: and then you set up this weird relationship again where
Speaker 5: like I have a little more power.
Speaker 4: Well did she pay?
Speaker 6: Well, I'd got.
Speaker 5: There early and I paid for my own but she
Speaker 5: arrived just as I was getting ready to pay. And
Speaker 5: like in the past, on your you know, one point
Speaker 5: zero would have been like, hey, just I'll get you two,
Speaker 5: just to be generous. But then it sets up a
Speaker 5: weird thing I feel like where I feel pressure. Yeah,
Speaker 5: like I feel pressure to or we're doing like a
Speaker 5: you got me, you get me next time? Like what
Speaker 5: if I don't want it next time, Let's just do our.
Speaker 4: Own thing, right, it sets up a next time. That's
Speaker 4: a good point.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I ask, why do you live in Kingston?
Speaker 5: Great question. Uh, it's Matt's fault. Matt lives here and
Speaker 5: I met Matt live there. Honestly, guys, I think when
Speaker 5: the apocalypse happens, I'm in one of the top ten
Speaker 5: places in the US to be I really do believe
Speaker 5: that we're at a good elevation. We don't have hurricanes,
Speaker 5: we don't have earthquakes. We don't have tornadoes. We have
Speaker 5: had an ice storm like once in the last five years,
Speaker 5: which is not a huge deal.
Speaker 3: Don't have a grocery store within twenty miles roast Starbucks?
Speaker 6: Yes, we do.
Speaker 1: You don't, No, I kind of I envied, I asked,
Speaker 1: because I envy you. I want to live in a
Speaker 1: place that's like a little less congested and just kind
Speaker 1: of you can go every you know, go outside and
Speaker 1: not run into people all the time, and you can
Speaker 1: just be out and listen to the birds. Like I
Speaker 1: envy where you are, and I wanted to know why
Speaker 1: you're there, and like what what gave you the gall
Speaker 1: to live in a place that's not a big city.
Speaker 3: Every time I read about a musician, they are recording
Speaker 3: in Kingston, or they're from there, or they have a
Speaker 3: bassis that's has a spot there.
Speaker 4: There's lots of musicians in Kingston.
Speaker 6: Was he drawn people are moving to h No.
Speaker 5: The real estate was really cheap at the time that
Speaker 5: he bought his house. But now everyone's moving to Beacon,
Speaker 5: which is a little farther south. Everyone lives in like
Speaker 5: Beacon or German Town or these are little places upstate
Speaker 5: or like Sogerty's or New Poults, you know, sunny New Pults.
Speaker 5: So they're all around here. Woodstock is completely turned into
Speaker 5: like Silver Lake on a Saturday afternoon, it's impossible to
Speaker 5: get in and out of there. As Nicky and the
Speaker 5: girls chat knows. I tried to buy a table in
Speaker 5: one Stock on a Saturday and it was absolute hell.
Speaker 6: But uh yeah, I ended up sharing.
Speaker 5: So much traffic and it's a tiny one like it's
Speaker 5: a one lane I mean traffic, one lane in each direction,
Speaker 5: and it's just absolute hell, like pedestrians.
Speaker 1: Just society hell, what hell to you? Because if compared
Speaker 1: to LA traffic, like el, I mean when someone says
Speaker 1: hell in Woodstock, that's like ten minutes of waiting, whereas
Speaker 1: that would take you.
Speaker 6: Figure, you're so right, you're so right.
Speaker 5: I was getting angry and then I was like, what
Speaker 5: are you angry about? And I just thought about that
Speaker 5: great Pete Holmes special where he's like angry.
Speaker 6: At everyone in LA for using ways and he's like, oh,
Speaker 6: you're psyched.
Speaker 5: You got there a minute earlier than me, and you
Speaker 5: look like you had a nervous breakdown and you're covered
Speaker 5: in sweat. Meanwhile, I'm just like zen in my car,
Speaker 5: Like he's like, just shut up and sit in traffic,
Speaker 5: listen to a podcast and shut up.
Speaker 6: Just accept it.
Speaker 3: So I was doing, and I guess you're like stressed
Speaker 3: to get somewhere. A minute or two minutes can make
Speaker 3: a huge difference. But yeah, yeah, getting frustrated by traffic
Speaker 3: is kind of ku funny.
Speaker 4: Nohow, yes, it's kind of sweet.
Speaker 3: It's just like what like find it's hack, you know,
Speaker 3: like everyone's mad about traffic.
Speaker 4: You rich, that's something new.
Speaker 1: Yeah, isn't it interesting now when you're running late for
Speaker 1: something and you got that number on your Google Maps
Speaker 1: and it says you're gonna arrive at three twenty four
Speaker 1: when you try to go so much faster, you risk
Speaker 1: your life and everyone around you to get there at
Speaker 1: three twenty two instead, as if that's gonna make a
Speaker 1: difference to anybody. And it feels like when I'm driving, like,
Speaker 1: all right, it says three twenty four, but if I
Speaker 1: go one hundred miles an hour and get there at
Speaker 1: three twenty two, everyone's gonna be okay with me being
Speaker 1: twenty two minutes late.
Speaker 4: We were late the other day to for Chris's birthday.
Speaker 3: I got him the poorest driving experience, which is this
Speaker 3: thing that one of my rich friends told me about
Speaker 3: that she did with her husband where they go and
Speaker 3: they you just drive two different Porsche cars and he
Speaker 3: drives with an instructor. And so he on this big
Speaker 3: track out in San Pedro, it's like south of lax
Speaker 3: And so he didn't know what I had bought him.
Speaker 3: It was a surprise. So I was like, we have
Speaker 3: to be there by two thirty. We're supposed to get there,
Speaker 3: and we were. I was shooting something on the beach
Speaker 3: for something and and up in Malibu, and I thought
Speaker 3: it was an hour away because I had wasised it
Speaker 3: the night before to see because it's cool in.
Speaker 4: Waves because you can see.
Speaker 3: Tomorrow at what time I want to get there, like
Speaker 3: what based on the traffic tomorrow.
Speaker 4: But they've been slipping, man, they've been slipping.
Speaker 3: Hard because they just they just give me the time
Speaker 3: for now, and I think they just like kind of
Speaker 3: wing it for the next day. They don't really know
Speaker 3: because it was an hour and a half to get
Speaker 3: down there in traffic. And I was like, Chris, we
Speaker 3: are supposed to be there two thirty, but we are
Speaker 3: now getting there at three oh five. I was like,
Speaker 3: it starts. It starts at three. Fuck, like it starts
Speaker 3: at three, but they want you to check in at
Speaker 3: two thirty. So it's kind of like, we're fine if
Speaker 3: we get there by three, but it's three oh five,
Speaker 3: and he's like, I will knock off ten minutes because
Speaker 3: we had an hour and a half, So ten minutes
Speaker 3: can be knocked off. With an hour and a half drive,
Speaker 3: you are really doing some maneuvering. So it was ironic
Speaker 3: because the whole way down there, he is driving like
Speaker 3: a Porsche race car driver and he was.
Speaker 4: Doing all these crazy things.
Speaker 3: And he later apologized to me, but I was like,
Speaker 3: I have become immune to your weaven and you know
Speaker 3: you turning in and bobin and weavin and like all
Speaker 3: the just gunning it and then going in the the
Speaker 3: lane where it's like the side lane where people turn
Speaker 3: off if they have a flat tire, like going down
Speaker 3: that and then like zipping in front of someone who's
Speaker 3: on their phone to get in.
Speaker 4: Like he's really good at it.
Speaker 3: We got honked at zero times, we got pulled over,
Speaker 3: zero times, I felt unsafe, zero times. He's good at it.
Speaker 3: So we got there and I was like, it's so crazy.
Speaker 3: He just spent the last ninety minutes, like Dale earnharding
Speaker 3: it down here. Luckily Dale Earnhardt Senior, because I think
Speaker 3: he didn't die driving. But anyway, so then we get
Speaker 3: down there and he sees the place and he's like,
Speaker 3: oh my god. And he was like, I've researched these places.
Speaker 3: This one's the best one. And we just walk in
Speaker 3: and they're waiting for us. Because sometimes when people see
Speaker 3: my name on a thing, I paid for it, so
Speaker 3: they just saw my name on the credit card because
Speaker 3: I put his name for all the things. Because I'm
Speaker 3: just there to sit and watch, like a mom watching
Speaker 3: her toddler on the playground.
Speaker 4: There's like a.
Speaker 3: Whole area for moms to watch their little kids go
Speaker 3: out and drive around and go room room. But there
Speaker 3: was this woman waiting for me, waiting for us right
Speaker 3: as we walked in. She had a lanyard for him
Speaker 3: with his name on it and the cars he's driving
Speaker 3: on it, like it's such like a kid's experience. We're
Speaker 3: like grown adult men, rich men. And he was so excited.
Speaker 3: But they had seen my name and she recognized me
Speaker 3: because she was a fan, which is so nice. So
Speaker 3: shout out to Michelle from the poorest driving experience, and
Speaker 3: they hooked us up and just well they didn't hook
Speaker 3: us up at all, honest with you. They were just
Speaker 3: nice to me. They gave me literally nothing. Actually, yes,
Speaker 3: they gave us one lap for free. Because at the
Speaker 3: end she was like, because he goes for an hour
Speaker 3: and a half, he's learning how to drive around this
Speaker 3: this track. Like there's tons of tracks, It's like miles
Speaker 3: and miles of tracks. There's one that's Chris could to
Speaker 3: explain it to you, guys, not that anyone really cares.
Speaker 3: I mean some people might, But there's this one part
Speaker 3: that there's like a skid like it's there's only two
Speaker 3: of these little things in the nation, I guess, and
Speaker 3: you drive over it and it pulls a thing out
Speaker 3: from under your tires and it makes your tires go
Speaker 3: like whoo, and you have like quickly like fix it,
Speaker 3: and then you skid all over these like this this
Speaker 3: tarp thing that has a bunch of water on it,
Speaker 3: so you go like wow and uh cool sound effects.
Speaker 3: And then so I watched him do that seven times,
Speaker 3: like it was literally like watching your kid go down
Speaker 3: a slide. Like you go down the slide very slow.
Speaker 3: By the way, he was going fifteen miles an hour
Speaker 3: when he did this part, Like there's nothing like it's
Speaker 3: cool because it's maneuvering tactics and he like learned how
Speaker 3: to be a better driver doing it. So then at
Speaker 3: the end she Michelle was talking to me. She was
Speaker 3: like the woman I want to be. She was like,
Speaker 3: she's older than me, but like just dressed perfectly, great makeup,
Speaker 3: great hair. She like loves cars. She's trying to talk
Speaker 3: to me about cars, little Dashieto. I have no interest
Speaker 3: in cars. I don't know anything about them. She's talking
Speaker 3: to me about like, well, I have four nine elevens,
Speaker 3: and I'm like, oh my god, I love talking about
Speaker 3: nine to eleven. Like that's all we have in common,
Speaker 3: was that she loved Porsche nine eleven's and I like
Speaker 3: talking about nine to eleven.
Speaker 4: Not the same thing.
Speaker 3: It is nine to eleven, by the way, shout out
Speaker 3: two survivors and.
Speaker 1: Shout out big survivors, nine eleven.
Speaker 4: Everyone who had anything to do with nine to eleven.
Speaker 4: Besides people did it. I don't know what to say,
Speaker 4: God damn it.
Speaker 3: Anyway, So she was like the coolest. And she used
Speaker 3: to work on the Dennis Miller Live Show. She used
Speaker 3: to work on Just Shoot Me. So we had like
Speaker 3: some friends. But she's a producer and now she's like,
Speaker 3: I just love she talks like this. She has like
Speaker 3: the greatest voice. She was like, Porsche.
Speaker 4: Oh, she said Porsche. Sorry, I'm supposed to say Porsche.
Speaker 3: Okay, sorry, this isn't Ellen's wife. It says it's Porsche.
Speaker 3: Who says Porsche. When you see a Porsche, do you
Speaker 3: say Porsche?
Speaker 1: Oh? Uh no, I say yeah, No, I don't.
Speaker 4: I say it.
Speaker 1: Oh, let me ask.
Speaker 4: Do you have a Porsche?
Speaker 3: And I was like, I have my mom's beat up
Speaker 3: old Lexus that has a huge debt in the back.
Speaker 3: Because I ended as trailer recently, it would be humiliating
Speaker 3: for I was like, I don't.
Speaker 4: I just uber everyone.
Speaker 3: I was like, I didn't even tell her what I
Speaker 3: drive because I don't even know the make and model
Speaker 3: of it. It's I know the I guess the make,
Speaker 3: but I don't know the model. I don't want anything
Speaker 3: about cars. It's so embarrassing when you're around someone who
Speaker 3: cares so much about it.
Speaker 4: And she's like, I just love this track. Look at
Speaker 4: that one over there, and that's.
Speaker 3: She's just like pointing out all the things, and she's
Speaker 3: so smart and educated about all this, and I felt
Speaker 3: like a real dumb dumb and I was eating a
Speaker 3: salad out of.
Speaker 4: A trash bag. It was like we didn't have means
Speaker 4: at my hotel room.
Speaker 3: And so I was like, babe, I told Chris because
Speaker 3: I went to go shoot this thing, and I said, hey,
Speaker 3: will you when you come to pick me up, will
Speaker 3: you bring the salad that's in the refrigerator because I
Speaker 3: didn't want to bring up with me because it had
Speaker 3: gotten too hot. And so he's like sure, and I
Speaker 3: was like, you need to put it in a bag though,
Speaker 3: because it's kind of kind of loose. It's going to
Speaker 3: break apart if you just put it in my tote bag.
Speaker 3: So all he had was trash bag. So I'm eating
Speaker 3: the salad up a trash bag and its container, Yes,
Speaker 3: in a container, but in a trash bag. And then oh,
Speaker 3: and then I threw it away because it was the
Speaker 3: wrong salad. He picked one that was like four days old,
Speaker 3: and I wanted him to bring the It was my fault.
Speaker 3: I told him bring the wrong one. So it smelled
Speaker 3: so bad. It was disgusting. It was like all these
Speaker 3: like rotting vegetables, and so I threw it away in
Speaker 3: the trash. I threw away my own car keys with
Speaker 3: the trash box. So at the end of this whole thing,
Speaker 3: when we say goodbye and we walk out to like leave,
Speaker 3: we can't find my keys. And we've just said goodbye
Speaker 3: to like everyone that's been so nice to us there.
Speaker 3: We had a great experience. The place is closing, They're
Speaker 3: like so glad their day is done. And I had
Speaker 3: to be like, I love's my keys. And I go
Speaker 3: back in and we're looking everywhere, but the place is immaculate.
Speaker 3: The keys are not there, and I'm like, I have
Speaker 3: a feeling I threw away the keys. So then I
Speaker 3: have to dig through the trash. This girl who doesn't
Speaker 3: even own a car, and everyone there owns like eighteen
Speaker 3: nine eleven's, they are all They're all staring at me digging.
Speaker 4: Chris goes through the trash finds the.
Speaker 3: Keys to our Thank god, it was a BMW, so
Speaker 3: I didn't look like a total idiot. But those that
Speaker 3: was just rented for me by this company that I'm
Speaker 3: working with, so I had nothing to do with it. It
Speaker 3: was just so humiliating, but they did at the end.
Speaker 3: So when he gets done with his lesson, he had
Speaker 3: so much fun. It was like he was truly like
Speaker 3: a child, Like he was like, that was the coolest thing.
Speaker 4: I've ever done.
Speaker 3: If you want to give your husband or boyfriend, or
Speaker 3: maybe your girlfriend, if she's into this kind of thing,
Speaker 3: the best gift ever. If anyone in your life is
Speaker 3: into cars, do a Porsche driving experience in La or
Speaker 3: there's like these dreve you can They're all these tracks
Speaker 3: are like all over the nation, but the Porsche Porsche
Speaker 3: one is one of the best.
Speaker 1: It would be the exact opposite for me. I mean,
Speaker 1: I would hate to be in the Porsch driving experience,
Speaker 1: but Ali would love it. She would oh yeah, she
Speaker 1: would love that. I mean I I one time I
Speaker 1: bought her a Mario Kart go karting racing experience, which
Speaker 1: was like not as cool as it sounds, but it
Speaker 1: was fine. You know, like there's like, no, it didn't.
Speaker 4: Sound cool at all.
Speaker 3: So I want to make sure you didn't think I
Speaker 3: thought that sounded cool.
Speaker 1: Well you can do, is it?
Speaker 4: Sorry?
Speaker 1: You know what Mario Kart is, right, of course, okay,
Speaker 1: so like you can do they have like regional races
Speaker 1: where you like participate in a Mario kart go karting race.
Speaker 1: You know, there's go karts that go fast, like it's
Speaker 1: not like go karting at a carnival. It's like fast
Speaker 1: go karts that could go around a track where there's
Speaker 1: a bunch of tires as the sides of the tracks.
Speaker 6: You don't die. It is fun.
Speaker 1: And then they're a regional Yeah, well, I don't think
Speaker 1: I have to wear a suit.
Speaker 6: Just like Yoshi, and like, yeah.
Speaker 1: Yes, yes you can. You can wear a onesie suit.
Speaker 1: So Ali dressed up like Yoshi, and then I think
Speaker 1: I dressed up like Luigi. And we went to this
Speaker 1: thing and it's like a regional race and if you
Speaker 1: place in this race, then you like go to Las
Speaker 1: Vegas and you race in like the big race in
Speaker 1: Las Vegas.
Speaker 4: Oh my god. So she didn't place.
Speaker 1: Well, we went there and I hate this stuff. I
Speaker 1: get motion sick in vehicles like this. I can't handle
Speaker 1: any of it. And but I was like, I don't
Speaker 1: know if I'm gonna be here, I'm gonna try, and
Speaker 1: I just I think it was because I was nauseous
Speaker 1: and dissociating from my body. But I had no I was.
Speaker 1: I had reckless, abandoned for my own well being, and
Speaker 1: I drove like a monster and I was cutting people off.
Speaker 1: I got yelled at multiple times by you gotta slow
Speaker 1: the fuck down from the people working there. This was
Speaker 1: in you know, someplace like four minutes outside lay. No, No,
Speaker 1: it wasn't there. And I wound up coming in third
Speaker 1: place and beating ally by one place. Oh my god, yes, yeah,
Speaker 1: And I was like I don't know, I just couldn't
Speaker 1: and I felt so sick. I wanted to throw up.
Speaker 1: I couldn't walk after.
Speaker 4: I was despite being horrible at it, you were good.
Speaker 1: I felt horrible, But it was like I left my
Speaker 1: body and like because I didn't give a shit whether
Speaker 1: or not I lived or died, I was just driving
Speaker 1: as fast as humanly as.
Speaker 6: Possible, not valuing your own life at that.
Speaker 1: But yeah, a moment, because I was so nauseous, I
Speaker 1: was driving this go.
Speaker 3: Car, I felt so sick. You were like, I want
Speaker 3: to just die, to be like a death. All right,
Speaker 3: we have to go to break and then we'll hear
Speaker 3: more about this when we get back, or maybe we won't.
Speaker 4: I don't know yet. All right, we're back.
Speaker 1: I have a question for you. Yes, Brian, what okay?
Speaker 1: So you know the type of car that's named after.
Speaker 1: Don't say the name. The type of car that's named
Speaker 1: after a black jungle ca it's like a kind of
Speaker 1: expensive car. Yes, okay, now say it in your head first,
Speaker 1: How do you say that word? How do you say
Speaker 1: that word?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 3: I don't like how people pronounce this word either, but
Speaker 3: it's it's jaguar, and I don't like jaguar.
Speaker 7: Wait, jaguar. You say jaguar, Jaguar, Yeah, this is this
Speaker 7: is the Jaguar. This is war like the band.
Speaker 3: What you're supposed to say?
Speaker 6: There's some.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there's three ways that people say it, Like people
Speaker 1: that want to sound fancy and British go jaguar.
Speaker 4: Like jaguar, Jracula, jaguar.
Speaker 1: And then there are people who say jaguar, which I
Speaker 1: believe is the way to say it.
Speaker 6: It just son on your team.
Speaker 3: Even though g u Ahar is Guar, I get it,
Speaker 3: but I feel like it's Jaguar.
Speaker 1: I don't know.
Speaker 6: I wire there's.
Speaker 1: No jaguar and it is. I can't imagine it's ja.
Speaker 1: How do you pronounce it.
Speaker 4: I don't know. I guess that's just my Midwest.
Speaker 3: I understand that it's not correct, just like like saying
Speaker 3: crayons or crowns or however, people say it's not correct,
Speaker 3: but it's like regional for me, and that is how
Speaker 3: I say it. And so, uh yeah, jaguar, I just
Speaker 3: don't say jaguar. Jaguar sounds like you're just like I'm
Speaker 3: because you're not done.
Speaker 4: With the worst jaguar jaguar jaguar war.
Speaker 3: She is Mormon and she always calls jaggy war Like
Speaker 3: I get stressed out talking about cars, like even like
Speaker 3: there's too many models, there's too many kinds, there's too
Speaker 3: many cylinders. Chris is like, the turning radius on this
Speaker 3: BMW is amazing. I'm like, then, why doesn't everyone get
Speaker 3: this turning radius? Like why doesn't this turning radius? Why
Speaker 3: don't they copy this kind of turning radius and make
Speaker 3: it in all the cars. If it's the best, these heat,
Speaker 3: these seats are the best, Let's use all those seats.
Speaker 3: Let's just make one car that does it. I'm I know,
Speaker 3: I'm talking about like we could do this for everything,
Speaker 3: and people like variety, but I just cars stress me out.
Speaker 3: Chris wants me to get one. I have to go
Speaker 3: pick up mine today from the shop. That's why we're
Speaker 3: doing this podcast earlier. I'm stressed out about getting it
Speaker 3: because it's just it's it's old, and it worries me
Speaker 3: all the time. Do you know what stressed me out
Speaker 3: more than anything? And I think, did I already talk
Speaker 3: about this? Cars going over curbs. No, It's added to
Speaker 3: my list of things that fucking caused me so much anxiety.
Speaker 4: When there's a car going over a curb and.
Speaker 3: It kind of goes like boom boom, and like in
Speaker 3: move in action movies. In Barbie, there's a scene where
Speaker 3: they're being chased and the car goes over a curb,
Speaker 3: and I'm like, it just ruined the axle, Like it
Speaker 3: just bothers me that they just ruin this car for
Speaker 3: this little curt Like and if my car hits a
Speaker 3: curb or it goes over a pothole, oh good, I
Speaker 3: want to do it stresses me out so much.
Speaker 1: That happened to me the other day. I was I was,
Speaker 1: I got an oil change and I was waiting out
Speaker 1: to pull out into a busy street and there was
Speaker 1: a traffic light there, so there was a bunch of
Speaker 1: cars backed up in a line, and I was just
Speaker 1: hoping that someone'd be polite enough to let me into
Speaker 1: that line, and somebody did, and I was like, oh
Speaker 1: my god, thank god.
Speaker 4: Yeah, ola does that?
Speaker 1: The light turned green, and like the lady was like,
Speaker 1: probably in the wrong for letting me go. She like
Speaker 1: was really maybe.
Speaker 4: Too Yeah, people could be too nice.
Speaker 1: But I was going to pull into the street and
Speaker 1: then I pulled to the right and I was too
Speaker 1: close and in front of everybody, in front of the
Speaker 1: lady that helped me, in front of the idea of
Speaker 1: the curve bomb. And it's like, oh my god, because
Speaker 1: not only did I embarrass myself, but I embarrassed the
Speaker 1: lady who was kind enough she vouched for me, She
Speaker 1: vouched for me, and I fucking bumped the curb in
Speaker 1: front of her.
Speaker 4: And everybody's so embarrassing.
Speaker 3: There's something I would rather just hit a wall and
Speaker 3: just like start smoking and I'll get all dented. Then
Speaker 3: it just then it continued going after it's been bomb bombed.
Speaker 4: I don't know why.
Speaker 3: It just like there's something about it that reminds me
Speaker 3: of when I was a kid. And I got a
Speaker 3: Barbie doll. It still stresses me out to this day,
Speaker 3: like I'm tensing up. I have to go to therapy
Speaker 3: later today. I'm going to my somatic therapist who talks
Speaker 3: about like what does your body do when you talk
Speaker 3: about things? And this is like causing me a lot
Speaker 3: of like I want to get small. I got a
Speaker 3: Little Mermaid Barbie doll for Easter one year. Maybe it
Speaker 3: wasn't a Little Mermaid because it feels too No, it
Speaker 3: was definitely Little Mermaids. It was like ninety one first grade,
Speaker 3: and her fucking bangs were bent in a way that
Speaker 3: I knew was like a manufacturing error, and I could
Speaker 3: not handle it that this Barbie's supposed to be perfect.
Speaker 3: It is perfect, it is in a box, it was
Speaker 3: bought new, but it's bangs are bent in a weird way.
Speaker 3: And I was hurling myself throughout my parents minivan. And
Speaker 3: it was one of the times where they looked at
Speaker 3: them each other and were like, she's crazy, and I
Speaker 3: kind of like knew I was, and I was like
Speaker 3: I can't control this though, Like I can't stand that
Speaker 3: this thing is now has like a little bit of
Speaker 3: damage to it that ruins the entire thing. So when
Speaker 3: my car goes over one of those things, I just
Speaker 3: feel like the alignment has now been set un straight
Speaker 3: and now it is imperfect and I've ruined everything because
Speaker 3: I'm stained and I did something wrong. Like it is
Speaker 3: such a childhood trauma thing of like why can't things
Speaker 3: be just perfect?
Speaker 4: I want them to stay perfect.
Speaker 3: As I look at a room that is almost horder
Speaker 3: levels behind this camera, horder levels of crap, I can't
Speaker 3: get out of my life even though Chris we've moved
Speaker 3: in together, and I came home last night to our
Speaker 3: new apartment because he's he changed a lot of things
Speaker 3: while I was gone for the past two months, and
Speaker 3: he changed them in great ways. But I was like
Speaker 3: he was cleaning out the podcast room because he had
Speaker 3: put a bunch of stuff in here as he was
Speaker 3: organizing other stuff, and I was.
Speaker 4: Like, I am so sorry.
Speaker 3: I have so much fucking crap, and he was like, no,
Speaker 3: You've actually done a really good job of getting rid
Speaker 3: of stuff.
Speaker 4: So I have done something, but it never ends.
Speaker 3: Can we just stop putting jewelry in little pouches, little
Speaker 3: velvet pouches. I'm tired of things coming in pouches. I'm
Speaker 3: tired of little I have too many little things, do
Speaker 3: you know talking about when I say that, why does
Speaker 3: everything have to have a bag with it? Why does
Speaker 3: everything have to have little buttons that come with it,
Speaker 3: or like a little sack of buttons or a little
Speaker 3: like a little extra bag of string and coats, Like I'm.
Speaker 4: Tired of little things.
Speaker 1: You ever order something from Amazon and it's usually from China,
Speaker 1: and then they give you like a little gift that
Speaker 1: you didn't ask for a.
Speaker 3: Long oh God, or Etsy, they send you like eighteen
Speaker 3: stickers plus a you know, another little bot like, yeah,
Speaker 3: a little gift.
Speaker 4: I'm gonna remember this company directly to the trash. And
Speaker 4: then I.
Speaker 3: Stress out though, because I'm throwing away something that like
Speaker 3: someone might go, oh, I love this, you know, like
Speaker 3: someone might love look.
Speaker 5: At this little pouch. I have this pouch. It came
Speaker 5: with my noise canceling headphones. But it's good because I
Speaker 5: use this pouch all the time for this little cable
Speaker 5: that connects my headphones to my computer or the airplane
Speaker 5: when you're watching stuff.
Speaker 3: A better person than me, I don't have anything. I
Speaker 3: don't think that way of like I'll put this little
Speaker 3: thing in this little thing.
Speaker 4: I just don't. I don't think that way. Brian.
Speaker 3: You even said that Ali during your vows, you were like,
Speaker 3: I'll always love you, Like you know how the thing
Speaker 3: that people do in vows Brian died too, where they
Speaker 3: like take something that they're annoyed by their spouse spouse about,
Speaker 3: but they go and I even love you for this thing.
Speaker 3: And it's like, you know, an annoying thing. And he's
Speaker 3: one of the things was he loves her for taking
Speaker 3: things out of little bags and putting them in littleer
Speaker 3: bags or something. I think you've explained it to already
Speaker 3: on the podcast, but I don't. I still don't understand
Speaker 3: what that is.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's only annoying because of when she decides to
Speaker 1: do it. And usually it's like when we need to
Speaker 1: like leave the car get ready to go to a thing.
Speaker 1: Ali has this thing where she needs to be I
Speaker 1: call it just being comfortable. Like I don't know about you,
Speaker 1: but I don't need to be comfortable at any point
Speaker 1: at any time of the day, Like if you're feeling
Speaker 1: like a little hot or a little thirsty or a
Speaker 1: little tired, I just keep going. I just keep barreling
Speaker 1: through the day until I finally collapse to my bed
Speaker 1: in a heap of agony.
Speaker 4: And that is uncomfortable.
Speaker 1: Your six, Allie is like, I've we've got to stop,
Speaker 1: and we've got to address this so that I'm one
Speaker 1: hundred percent comfortable. And so one of those things is
Speaker 1: taking stuff out of bags and putting them into other
Speaker 1: bags so that there isn't too many things in one bag.
Speaker 1: Or she has everything she needs in a littler bag,
Speaker 1: and it takes a really long time, and I find
Speaker 1: it to be entirely unnecessary, because like, yeah, just take
Speaker 1: the whole bag, or it doesn't matter if this is
Speaker 1: in that bag or that's in this bag.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Chris is like that too. He likes to be efficient.
Speaker 1: Yes, I don't know what it is actually, Like I honestly,
Speaker 1: that's the other thing. I don't understand it. I don't
Speaker 1: understand why that thing needs to be in that bag.
Speaker 5: Is it a perse situation or are they're like plastic bags,
Speaker 5: like what's insight?
Speaker 1: All sorts of fucking bags, all sorts of bags. I
Speaker 1: don't even know what she's moving from one bag to
Speaker 1: the next bag. All I know is that it about
Speaker 1: fifteen minutes, and it's in the car. Sometimes it's in
Speaker 1: the car. Sometimes it's like as we're getting ready to go,
Speaker 1: and it's like, hold on, I gotta move my sunglasses.
Speaker 1: I had my sungnglasses in my fanny pack, and now
Speaker 1: I need to take it out of my fanny pack
Speaker 1: and put it into my sunglass case, which is inside
Speaker 1: my backpack. And then I need to take my water
Speaker 1: bottle out of my backpack and put it into my
Speaker 1: smaller bag that I'm going to carry with me my hands.
Speaker 4: It's like he's just efficient.
Speaker 3: He doesn't want to waste any he doesn't want to
Speaker 3: carry anything that he doesn't need to carry. He wants
Speaker 3: to bring everything that is the right amount and have
Speaker 3: a bag for it that is the perfect size for that.
Speaker 1: But it's not efficient because it takes fifteen minutes to
Speaker 1: organize the bag.
Speaker 4: Would agree.
Speaker 3: I don't understand how slow people move, and that is
Speaker 3: sometimes my boyfriend, even though I understand why he does it,
Speaker 3: because he doesn't forget things, he doesn't lose things. But
Speaker 3: the way he like opens bags, like if I even
Speaker 3: touch his bag, like I know I have to like
Speaker 3: hold the zipper, like like I have to hold where
Speaker 3: the zipper starts and then the zipper, Whereas I would
Speaker 3: just like grab at my zipper without holding the bag,
Speaker 3: so the whole bag would mood with my zipper and
Speaker 3: I'd yank it.
Speaker 5: You know.
Speaker 4: But when I touch his bags, I have to be like.
Speaker 3: Careful, careful, open it delicately, like it's like I'm almost
Speaker 3: it's it's it's actually going great because he doesn't care
Speaker 3: that I'm messy.
Speaker 5: And the Great City Show, because I would watch every
Speaker 5: episode of this.
Speaker 3: He is now for a guy who eats Emo's pizza,
Speaker 3: which is literally it's kind of smells like a dumpster
Speaker 3: like it is the it's I worked there in high school.
Speaker 3: It's it's it's gross. It's bad for you, there's no
Speaker 3: question of it. He's crazy about water and like plastic
Speaker 3: containers and like he doesn't want any kind of microplastics
Speaker 3: or any like weird stuff. So we are now having
Speaker 3: we have water delivered. I have I'm I'm a person
Speaker 3: who has water delivered to my house. And I go,
Speaker 3: let's just get a britta and just use the tap.
Speaker 6: You have the best arcoll filtered thing that's everything has a.
Speaker 3: Burkie, yes, and we it's up on the shelf now
Speaker 3: because we're not using it. He just wants to do
Speaker 3: spring water, and we have like a receptacle for it,
Speaker 3: and we're having it delivered in these giant glass bottles.
Speaker 3: I don't know he's in charge of that. So I'm like, sweet,
Speaker 3: I have this water that tastes like nothing. It's great,
Speaker 3: it's great water. But I don't. I don't care about
Speaker 3: that kind of thing. I'm glad he does. My refrigerator
Speaker 3: is spotless. All of my drawers have little compartments. Now
Speaker 3: every there's a little He went to the container store
Speaker 3: and bought everything, and so we have a container in
Speaker 3: every single cabinet. Everything is organized. It's beautiful and I
Speaker 3: had nothing to do with it. And he does not
Speaker 3: mind that. I am nothing like that. He Last night
Speaker 3: we made dinner, and by making dinner, we took we
Speaker 3: He got me emos and I got whole food.
Speaker 6: So we just like and by hole assembled it on
Speaker 6: a bar.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we put it on barely. Now, I ate it
Speaker 3: out of the plastic container. Did it assembling a p
Speaker 3: chargers like eating dinner. I don't know why I said,
Speaker 3: made dinner, ate dinner, and afterwards we're like cleaning up
Speaker 3: and I'm like, man, if I lived alone, I would
Speaker 3: just like get this in the morning, Like I don't
Speaker 3: really care about going to bed with a clean home,
Speaker 3: and I know most people on here probably would, But
Speaker 3: as long as it's not like leaving old food out,
Speaker 3: I'd probably just like I don't know, I'd probably just
Speaker 3: throw it on the sink. The sink is like a
Speaker 3: trash until I'm ready to put things in the trash,
Speaker 3: it like clears things off. It's just in a dirty
Speaker 3: little receptacle kind of. But last night I was like,
Speaker 3: how does a girlfriend behave? I washed off the plastic,
Speaker 3: I put it in the thing.
Speaker 1: I wiped it off the.
Speaker 3: Oh, Chris is home dogs? Calm down, Hey, Chris, will
Speaker 3: you let the dogs out to see you.
Speaker 1: It's so interesting that he organized the closets and the
Speaker 1: drawers and stuff, because I did the exact same thing.
Speaker 1: Whereas Ali does the bags into other bags. She doesn't
Speaker 1: give a shit about putting little drawers and closets and
Speaker 1: making sure there's elving in the in the cabinets. And
Speaker 1: I went and I did that for every cabinet in
Speaker 1: the kitchen and all the closets. So what's that? Why
Speaker 1: don't I care about the bags, but I care about
Speaker 1: the the thing that Chris cares about.
Speaker 4: I don't know, I don't I don't know.
Speaker 3: Again, I can't really say this another time, But I
Speaker 3: don't know why I am the way I am, and
Speaker 3: I wish I was testosterone.
Speaker 5: Really a question for you guys, which I think might
Speaker 5: be related to hormone differences. So someone let their dog
Speaker 5: poop in on our front yard and we have a
Speaker 5: nest camera and every time this happens, Matt is like,
Speaker 5: I cannot wait to go through the nest camera and
Speaker 5: see which of our neighbors let their dog do this.
Speaker 5: And I would love to see that too, And I
Speaker 5: was like, oh God, here we go. And he was furious.
Speaker 5: So he's like, I can't who does this? And then
Speaker 5: he like get we were going to see the movie
Speaker 5: and we relate for the movie because he had to
Speaker 5: go in the house get clean up the thing. Take vinegar,
Speaker 5: pour vinegar all over the lawn. I'm like, why are
Speaker 5: you doing this? She's like it was dogs, because if
Speaker 5: a dog shits on a lawn, and he will always
Speaker 5: go back to shit on that lawn. But if you
Speaker 5: put cayenne pepper or vinegar on it, they will not
Speaker 5: want to poop there again.
Speaker 4: So your law has to do the master cleanse after.
Speaker 5: And yeah, I think Cayenne Pepper's not very nice to do,
Speaker 5: but he did vinegar. So anyway, Uh, he finds the
Speaker 5: person and he's.
Speaker 4: Like, I found it.
Speaker 1: I found it.
Speaker 5: Oh my god, I knew it was this lady. I
Speaker 5: knew it was her. She never says hi to me. Oh,
Speaker 5: she's always weird to me. And I'm like, let me
Speaker 5: see this. And I look, and I couldn't believe my eyes.
Speaker 5: This woman lets her dog poop on the front lawn,
Speaker 5: mimics picking it up. She has one of those gloves
Speaker 5: that's a poop bag, takes her glove, mimics picking it up, yes,
Speaker 5: and then leaves it. And I'm like, oh my god.
Speaker 5: We closed up on it several times. I'm like, I
Speaker 5: can't believe.
Speaker 4: Someone would do this. So that's what fashion crazy, I know.
Speaker 5: And then Matt I was like, next time I see her,
Speaker 5: I'm going to tell her I saw what you did,
Speaker 5: and I'm gonna call the police.
Speaker 6: Next.
Speaker 5: I'm like, don't, well, that wasn't I'm like, there's no
Speaker 5: police show up. It's like there is, there's a dog,
Speaker 5: there's a dog unit. I'm like, Okay, that's not the police,
Speaker 5: so that's like a dog a dog patrol or whatever.
Speaker 3: Yeah, No, I cared about someone. He's turning into an
Speaker 3: old man if he's going to call the police after
Speaker 3: a poop on a line. I was like, you could
Speaker 3: just bruck her and just be like, why did you
Speaker 3: mind picking it up? That is so embarrassing we have
Speaker 3: you miming picking up dog shit.
Speaker 1: Can just talk for a one time and she'll never
Speaker 1: do it again because she's so embarrassed.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I wonder today I was my dog shit and
Speaker 3: I and I didn't have a bag, and these people
Speaker 3: sitting outside Starbucks saw my dog shit, and so I
Speaker 3: had to.
Speaker 4: Go like, where's the bags.
Speaker 3: Gotta go get the bags because I always pick up
Speaker 3: dog shit. And if I forget to pick up my
Speaker 3: owns dogshit because I don't have a bag, later on
Speaker 3: I'll pick up a dog shit that is my dog's
Speaker 3: for the fact that I didn't get that shit, because
Speaker 3: usually I pick it up with leaves or with mults.
Speaker 3: You guys, if you've seen my reality show, you know
Speaker 3: my mulch trick where you just douse it with tons
Speaker 3: of mulch and you cover it like a birthday cake
Speaker 3: and sprinkles, and so you pick it up and you're
Speaker 3: only touching the sprinkles the mault and you're not touching
Speaker 3: the shit. It's a great idea or grass any kind
Speaker 3: of thing. But I used I had to get Starbucks
Speaker 3: napkins today.
Speaker 4: But these guys did think.
Speaker 3: I was just going to leave it, and I was like, oh,
Speaker 3: I know they're whispering about me and I but I would.
Speaker 3: I think it's so crazy to do that, to leave it.
Speaker 3: This woman's mentally unwell, for sure.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's not such a paradise after at all. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you want to hear something interesting. I don't know if
Speaker 1: you're going to find this interesting. Tell me if you
Speaker 1: think this is interesting, because I find this to be interesting.
Speaker 1: The population of Kingston is currently twenty four thousand, one hundred.
Speaker 1: In nineteen ninety, guess what the population of Kingston.
Speaker 4: Was twenty eight thousand.
Speaker 1: Oh you think it went down.
Speaker 3: I mean that's why I think this is maybe interesting,
Speaker 3: because otherwise how could this be interesting?
Speaker 4: So I'm gonna guess unless Speak died.
Speaker 1: Thirty years ago. A generation ago, the population of Kingston
Speaker 1: was twenty three thousand, eight hundred and ninety four, so
Speaker 1: it's basically not changed at all.
Speaker 3: Wow, that is interesting. Yeah, okay, no, it's not say it.
Speaker 3: It's just the same.
Speaker 5: That helps me understand why no businesses are open here ever.
Speaker 4: It just like everything, there's no businesses.
Speaker 5: Like if you want Mexican food, I hope you know,
Speaker 5: you can only get it Thursday, Friday and Saturday at
Speaker 5: the very popular Mexican food restaurant in town that everyone loves.
Speaker 6: That's it.
Speaker 4: Do you do you eat? Do you make every meal?
Speaker 6: No?
Speaker 5: We go out once in a while, but we do.
Speaker 5: We cook a lot, but we like cooking a lot.
Speaker 5: Like I haven't been truly blown away by a lot
Speaker 5: of restaurant food here.
Speaker 4: What do you guys cook? Like, what's your number one
Speaker 4: thing to cook?
Speaker 6: Number one thing?
Speaker 5: I mean, I love this gluten free pasta I make.
Speaker 5: We do that with like a you know, like a
Speaker 5: quote unquote bolognietes, but it's beyond meat, and then like
Speaker 5: a tomato sauce, and then we make a nice big salad.
Speaker 6: Lately, I've been really into sandwiches for lunch.
Speaker 5: I don't know why, because there's a fancy sandwich place
Speaker 5: here and it's like fifty bucks every time we go,
Speaker 5: and we're like, let's just learn how to make these
Speaker 5: sandwiches and they're amazing, okay, And so I just make
Speaker 5: like a really yummy vegan sand or a vegetarian sandwich
Speaker 5: with like a fried egg and then sprouts and lettuce
Speaker 5: and tomato.
Speaker 6: This place does it with soaur kraut.
Speaker 5: So I should just buy candy, but like basic vegetarian food.
Speaker 6: Mostly and we love it. Okay, all right, what do
Speaker 6: you guys do? Takeout?
Speaker 3: I did take out for every single meal and that's
Speaker 3: just what.
Speaker 1: My life, you know. And Chris don't cook at all.
Speaker 3: Chris will cook a little, but sometimes when he's like
Speaker 3: trying to be better about being healthy because he doesn't
Speaker 3: really have options for healthy food like elsewhere, so he'll
Speaker 3: like make Brussels sprouts and stuff.
Speaker 4: But like, no, we don't. We don't cook at all.
Speaker 6: That's why I go out.
Speaker 5: I want to go out for something I couldn't possibly make,
Speaker 5: like really delicious Brussels sprouts.
Speaker 6: I don't know how to make them, so.
Speaker 5: They're like all fried or yeah, like.
Speaker 4: Sugar is that it?
Speaker 3: I mean anything that is cooked elsewhere that you're like,
Speaker 3: how do they do it.
Speaker 4: It's usually those ingredients.
Speaker 1: I think, well, for Brussels sprouts, you need the flamethrower
Speaker 1: thing to make them really crispy and burned.
Speaker 6: I guess we got to get air fryers. Everybody's doing
Speaker 6: air No, I.
Speaker 3: Was gonna go as out of style soon, I bet
Speaker 3: you no.
Speaker 4: But I don't know what i'd air fry.
Speaker 5: Everybody's like it's incredible, sweet potato fries, chicken nuggets, tofu nuggets,
Speaker 5: deep fried anything, call of our wings, Like you can
Speaker 5: make the most.
Speaker 6: I don't know.
Speaker 3: People live their lives where they have to cook all
Speaker 3: their meals. Yeah, they are constantly cleaning their will take a.
Speaker 1: Really long time to cook your dinner. I mean it's
Speaker 1: you know, you can do fast stuff, but.
Speaker 4: If you want to make a clean dinner, yeah.
Speaker 1: No, it takes a long time. Every time I do,
Speaker 1: it's like, wow, I just spent from the hours of
Speaker 1: five pm until seven thirty pm cooking and cleaning my
Speaker 1: my dinner. Yep, I clean my dinner too.
Speaker 6: It's a lot of maintenance and upkeep.
Speaker 3: But I will say takeout makes you feel bad because
Speaker 3: you are constantly throwing away plastic.
Speaker 1: And it costs like seven thousand dollars, that is.
Speaker 3: But that's my one thing that I that's why I
Speaker 3: that's my one indulgence that that in Taylor Swift tickets things.
Speaker 1: The population of Saint Louis, Okay, right now in twenty
Speaker 1: twenty three, it is two hundred and ninety three thousand,
Speaker 1: three hundred and ten.
Speaker 3: That's here, Saint Louis City, Saint Louis City.
Speaker 1: Yeah, isn't that what it is?
Speaker 4: Yeah, but that's not where I live, not even in St.
Speaker 1: Louis County. Yeah, okay, so Saint Louis County. Okay, Well,
Speaker 1: this one's nice.
Speaker 4: I think we're like millions.
Speaker 1: The population of Saint Louis County is nine hundred and
Speaker 1: ninety seven thousand, one hundred and eighty seven.
Speaker 6: Oh yeah, what was it in nineteen ninety whatever?
Speaker 1: In nineteen ninety it was basically the same, nine three thousand.
Speaker 3: But this is the town's family moved here from Cincinnati.
Speaker 2: Oh.
Speaker 1: It's interesting is the city has decreased dramatically since nineteen ninety.
Speaker 1: Oh the city.
Speaker 3: Yeah because yeah, white flight baby. Yeah, Saint Louis is
Speaker 3: very segregated and very scared of the city.
Speaker 4: That's why I said, like it's different.
Speaker 3: Like my sister lives kind of in the city, and
Speaker 3: you would think she lives on skid row with how
Speaker 3: people respond with like you live in the city. I mean,
Speaker 3: her car was stolen twice in one week.
Speaker 5: I think, so should they have two cars stolen or
Speaker 5: one car twice?
Speaker 4: Two different cars stolen? Both of their cars were stolen,
Speaker 4: I think in one week.
Speaker 3: From the driveway, we gotta go, we gotta go a break.
Speaker 3: But I want to talk about something that happened with
Speaker 3: Luigi last night. When we get back my step dog
Speaker 3: or not step dog? My, Uh, what's the my he
Speaker 3: was my dog, but I've given him away?
Speaker 6: What is my biological dog? Her biological say? Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 6: we'll back up to the.
Speaker 4: Okay, we're back here.
Speaker 3: I am with Marion, my dog, and Luigi's in the
Speaker 3: other room with Chris because he hates me right now
Speaker 3: because the dogs are staying with me right now and less.
Speaker 3: My parents taught me a funny trick with It's not
Speaker 3: even a trick. It's actually really cruel now that I
Speaker 3: think about it. But you know what, certain dogs respond
Speaker 3: to certain words like w alk or like t r
Speaker 3: e A T. And you have to like spell it
Speaker 3: so they don't get too worked up. Well, there's a
Speaker 3: certain word that makes Luigi so sad and like turn
Speaker 3: like it's just it's funny, how fucking sad he gets
Speaker 3: so quickly.
Speaker 4: But if you say the word.
Speaker 3: B A T H, he he is tail goes between
Speaker 3: his legs.
Speaker 4: You would think that he has been beaten in baths.
Speaker 4: So I can't even believe it.
Speaker 3: I said the word because I said I would never
Speaker 3: say it around there is something something horrible happened to him.
Speaker 2: They used to happen to my dog Bruno, Like if
Speaker 2: if he would hear me whispering bath, he would just hide.
Speaker 4: Why do they so much?
Speaker 3: It's not that long, it's not that horrible, but you
Speaker 3: would think he has was like it's like I said
Speaker 3: the R word to someone who has had that happened
Speaker 3: to them, Like he was traumatized in a way that
Speaker 3: I felt so bad because I've saying to because it
Speaker 3: was like, Chris, look how funny this is because my
Speaker 3: parents showed it to me, and it was really funny
Speaker 3: when I first saw it, because he just like.
Speaker 4: Puts the stail between his likes and he just kind
Speaker 4: of tiptoes into a dark room to like it's so funny.
Speaker 5: And we say bunny, she's she saw bunny once outside
Speaker 5: and now she knows the word. And if you ever
Speaker 5: say bunny, she gets her ears go crazy and she
Speaker 5: goes to the window and for like an hour she's
Speaker 5: just staring out like laser focused out the window, waiting
Speaker 5: for a non existent bunny to come.
Speaker 4: That's sad, but that's actually like, she's not like sad.
Speaker 3: Though Luigi looked like he was reminded of a time
Speaker 3: where you know, he got severely or something.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's exactly it in them.
Speaker 3: And so last night I did it and Chris was like,
Speaker 3: I think this is cool because he.
Speaker 4: Went in the other room and he wouldn't come out,
Speaker 4: and I was like, babe, I'm so sorry.
Speaker 3: Camere and he he was he then he started shaking
Speaker 3: trembling like crazy. Guys like just like but he also
Speaker 3: is a kind of dog that likes to be a
Speaker 3: baby and likes to be a widow, like likes when
Speaker 3: he gets like, I go, are you a sad dog?
Speaker 3: He'll like get sad or looking to just get like
Speaker 3: and he'll just get like kind of limp bodied. So
Speaker 3: sometimes he I can make him start shaking if I
Speaker 3: just go, oh, is someone so sad and he will
Speaker 3: eventually start shaking. The last time he was shaking so
Speaker 3: much from the mansion of a batch. And then I
Speaker 3: started saying like, oh man, I have a math problem
Speaker 3: to do late, like I was just saying things at
Speaker 3: rhyme with it, and he was even getting triggered by that,
Speaker 3: and and I felt so bad. And the rest of
Speaker 3: the night he was mad at me. He was mad
Speaker 3: at me until we for hours after he wouldn't we
Speaker 3: were eating popcorn. He wouldn't take a popcorn from my hand.
Speaker 3: He would only take it from chrystals.
Speaker 5: He was like.
Speaker 4: Punishing, so mad at me.
Speaker 3: He's very smart, He's such an asshole and he h
Speaker 3: I love him so much, But I was just wondering
Speaker 3: if you guys, I'm glad that Bruno had that same response,
Speaker 3: like why.
Speaker 4: It's they get clean?
Speaker 3: And also as soon as we get done with the bath,
Speaker 3: I go, it's tell time. And then I go like
Speaker 3: with towels, and I just like messed owls around their
Speaker 3: head and they freaking love some nothing more than how
Speaker 3: do you bathe him? I used to bathe them like
Speaker 3: once a month. I think, like not that much and
Speaker 3: he would love it when it was over, and it's like,
Speaker 3: wasn't even that worth it? Like it's almost like working out,
Speaker 3: like I work out, because the feeling afterworkinglain.
Speaker 6: That to him.
Speaker 2: Yeah, right, Bruno would also turn it. Bruno would also
Speaker 2: turn into a stone in the shower, so he.
Speaker 4: Would not like move.
Speaker 2: Yes, it was like that dog that like turned into
Speaker 2: a statue. And I think it was like Home Alone
Speaker 2: or something POMPEII in Problem Child. I don't know if
Speaker 2: you've seen that movie.
Speaker 4: Oh no, but I know what you mean.
Speaker 3: Like, I like that's what Luigi does too, just like
Speaker 3: gets totally shivery and so tense and like like a boner,
Speaker 3: like stiff, like a boner.
Speaker 5: Do you try treats because Willy used to do that
Speaker 5: and hate baths And now I just bring treats up
Speaker 5: there and just keep giving her treats the whole bath
Speaker 5: and now she jumps into the tub like a little
Speaker 5: bit of life.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 3: But what is the difference between like a dog when
Speaker 3: you you know, when you scratch a dog in an
Speaker 3: area where they're like oh yeah, and they kind of
Speaker 3: get tense and they like they like start shaking their
Speaker 3: leg and they kind of like start shaking, and they
Speaker 3: like look up into the sky and they almost their
Speaker 3: bodies start twisting and contorting because they're in such ecstasy.
Speaker 4: How is that not an orgasm? How is that not?
Speaker 3: Like Marian will have one right now if I get
Speaker 3: her spot She was having one last night, And I
Speaker 3: was like, there's no difference between me and Marian when
Speaker 3: we have an orgasm, the same thing, the same body.
Speaker 3: Con she finished, And I just remember as a kid
Speaker 3: being like doing that to dogs, making their legs twitch
Speaker 3: and making them get all tense and stuff, and not
Speaker 3: even thinking anything of it. Like, but I wonder if
Speaker 3: my parents were constantly like, oh my god, that dog
Speaker 3: looks like it's having an orgasm, Like I wonder if
Speaker 3: all adults were always thinking, like a dog looks like
Speaker 3: it's coming now, why would they connect the two?
Speaker 1: And then he gets really tired after her and then
Speaker 1: he starts smoking a cigarette.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 5: When I was a kid, I hated baths and my
Speaker 5: parents told me that for two years they didn't give
Speaker 5: me a because I would scream. And my Dad's like,
Speaker 5: you developed scabs on your head, you know, you were
Speaker 5: really difficult. I'm like, you're a terrible parent.
Speaker 4: Like, why are you blaming me?
Speaker 6: Right?
Speaker 4: Not for two years.
Speaker 5: That's I know, But somehow it was my fault. It
Speaker 5: was an infant, like you were really problematic, really weird kid.
Speaker 6: Just didn't like why that was before.
Speaker 4: Wet wipes, Like what did parents do back then?
Speaker 6: Just get a wreg.
Speaker 5: I don't know the feeling of water on my head,
Speaker 5: so maybe it's not that rare well.
Speaker 1: Anya bringing up this camera that she filmed her neighbor
Speaker 1: doing the poop reminded me of this story I read
Speaker 1: over the weekend that made me feel crazy. But there's
Speaker 1: this couple in Florida who had just had a baby
Speaker 1: and they're downstairs. Neighbor complained that the baby was crying
Speaker 1: too much, and but there's nothing that they could do
Speaker 1: about it. It's a crying baby. But then a couple
Speaker 1: of months go by and all of a sudden, they
Speaker 1: start noticing a weird chemical smell in the apartment. Yes,
Speaker 1: they started raising a weird chemical smell in the apartment,
Speaker 1: and they're like, that's weird. And they tried to look everywhere.
Speaker 1: They looked at the hot water heater, they looked at
Speaker 1: the gas leak, they look for everything in the house
Speaker 1: and they fix things, and they thought they got rid
Speaker 1: of the chemical smell, but then all of a sudden,
Speaker 1: the baby, who is now like one or something, started
Speaker 1: vomiting and getting and crying, getting really sick.
Speaker 4: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and they were like, we don't know what's going on.
Speaker 1: So then they decided to put some cameras. They hit
Speaker 1: some cameras in a bush right outside their front door
Speaker 1: to be like, what the fuck is going on? What's
Speaker 1: this chemical smell? Why is everybody in the house getting sick?
Speaker 1: And this is going on for months and months and months,
Speaker 1: and then one day, all of a sudden they see
Speaker 1: on their camera their neighbor to the one who complained
Speaker 1: about the baby crying before he leaves for work or whatever,
Speaker 1: he walks up to the front door with a syringe
Speaker 1: and he injects chemicals underneath the door jam into the
Speaker 1: house and then walks away and they have him direct
Speaker 1: It's like it's like this was filmed for with the Apple.
Speaker 1: I didn't see it that yet, so okay, but it's
Speaker 1: like this was film for a television show that you
Speaker 1: can see his face, you can see this perfectly framed,
Speaker 1: this guy injecting the syringe, and they found out that
Speaker 1: this guy, who was a chemistry doctorate student at the
Speaker 1: at a local university, was taking chemicals, mixing them together
Speaker 1: like a fucking mad scientist, and injecting them into the
Speaker 1: door of the house to try to kill the baby
Speaker 1: because he was mad that it was crying all the time.
Speaker 3: Jesus, yes, God, final thought. People are insane. Did you
Speaker 3: have to brind this the other day?
Speaker 4: Seriously?
Speaker 3: People are so stupid and crazy. First of all, how
Speaker 3: do you not know that everywhere is cameras. If I
Speaker 3: wanted to murder someone, I just wouldn't do it because
Speaker 3: everywhere's cameras. There's cameras all over. You're not You're always
Speaker 3: gonna get caught.
Speaker 4: You're fucked like.
Speaker 3: You can't murder someone anymore. This isn't nineteen forties. Oppenheimer
Speaker 3: could have killed that chemistry guy with the apple, even
Speaker 3: though I heard that's not a true story based on
Speaker 3: that was one of the parts of the movie that
Speaker 3: wasn't real, and it's not.
Speaker 4: Don't worry. Don't get mad at me about the spoiler.
Speaker 3: It was two seconds of a movie and it never
Speaker 3: comes back to even be a part of the movie, right,
Speaker 3: Anya correct? Okay Anya? I saw Oppenheimer. Oh waite again.
Speaker 3: I just want to say this too. There's a website
Speaker 3: called like rent a Hitman. I told Brian about this,
Speaker 3: and they are getting They're catching so many people who
Speaker 3: are trying to kill people because people really think it's
Speaker 3: a place you can get a hit man, and so
Speaker 3: they're signing up and trying to procure.
Speaker 4: A hit man.
Speaker 3: And so go to rent a Hitman dot com and
Speaker 3: see it's like a fake website to catch people who
Speaker 3: are trying to kill their spouses.
Speaker 4: I'm guessing I saw Oppenheimer. I loved it.
Speaker 3: I don't really know what I saw though, to be
Speaker 3: honest with you, it was I saw Killian Murphy is
Speaker 3: hot and cool and I like watching him. He's just
Speaker 3: hot in a weird, mysterious kind of creepy way.
Speaker 4: He's a great actor. Emily Blunt. I'm a fan now.
Speaker 5: I know.
Speaker 3: I'm like cod why is she and everything? But I
Speaker 3: get why she's and everything. She's fucking good and I
Speaker 3: liked how they like made her look more and more
Speaker 3: like old and alcoholic throughout the movie. I saw it
Speaker 3: the Chinese Grahm in theater, like the gigantic seventy K
Speaker 3: screen or whatever it is. It was a very loud movie.
Speaker 3: I had to put earplugs in the entire time. Heeling
Speaker 3: fast paced, there was no need for there was three
Speaker 3: I was almost like Ariostour, you never get bored because
Speaker 3: it changes so fast all the time. It's like there's
Speaker 3: not but there's no boring scenes. It flips around a lot.
Speaker 3: I did feel like it was like the same kind
Speaker 3: of movie over the same scene over and over, because
Speaker 3: it kind of was, because it went through like but
Speaker 3: I thought it was great, and yeah, I liked it.
Speaker 3: I don't know what to feel after it. It didn't
Speaker 3: like stay with me though. I'm not like thinking about
Speaker 3: it a ton after I saw it.
Speaker 4: It was good, though, what did you think about it?
Speaker 3: Anya? Because I haven't talked to anyone who's seen it
Speaker 3: about about it, I know that you you would.
Speaker 5: I was impressed visually, but I also was like, this
Speaker 5: is not this is not for me. Christopher Nolan is
Speaker 5: famous for really using soundtrack so much, and for me,
Speaker 5: it was just like I'm distracted by this sound being
Speaker 5: so loud throughout the whole thing. It's like a movie trailer.
Speaker 5: It's like I just want to hear these people talk
Speaker 5: and I don't need like swelling strings in this part.
Speaker 6: It's just like I.
Speaker 3: Would have loved some captions up in that bitch. I
Speaker 3: felt very like, I am used to captions. Now I
Speaker 3: need them, I want them. I thought, uh, yeah, I
Speaker 3: really liked it, and it was I'm glad I saw
Speaker 3: it and it's Christmas mail alone, And I said, what
Speaker 3: do you mean by that?
Speaker 6: To male gaze?
Speaker 5: Like Florence p it doesn't need to be nude in
Speaker 5: every scene.
Speaker 4: I liked it.
Speaker 5: No, she didn't, though. It was all about like her
Speaker 5: tit in every shot. It's like what she's saying is
Speaker 5: actually kind of important, but we just have to put
Speaker 5: her naked in this scene again.
Speaker 3: Do you know your ears and your nipples completely match
Speaker 3: up mine?
Speaker 4: I found this just yours Anya.
Speaker 3: I read a fact about Annia last night on your
Speaker 3: ear loaves, and your nipples are perfectly aligned, or should
Speaker 3: be if you're yeah, think about it.
Speaker 4: That kind of makes sense. Yeah, I like it.
Speaker 3: I don't know why that was interesting to make you
Speaker 3: learn Oppenheimer last night. It was a good film, That's
Speaker 3: what I learned. I have to go because I have
Speaker 3: to go to therapy and to get my car. But
Speaker 3: thank you guys for doing the podcast today. Thank you
Speaker 3: for listening to the podcasts. I'm on tour this week
Speaker 3: Chicago Theater Friday. I'm very excited about it. New material,
Speaker 3: new merch Anya will be there, Chris will be there.
Speaker 3: He's not performing, but he'll be in the house, and
Speaker 3: and you will be there.
Speaker 4: Hopefully.
Speaker 3: Tell your friends Chicago this week. I really want to
Speaker 3: sell it out. We are not even close, and I
Speaker 3: would really like to get those tickets.
Speaker 4: A move in.
Speaker 3: This isn't like Aerra store. If you buy a ticket
Speaker 3: to my show, it actually matters. It's not like every
Speaker 3: seat counts, and I really appreciate it if you come so.
Speaker 3: And also Peoria on Saturday and also in Illinois.
Speaker 4: I'm very excited about that show as well.
Speaker 3: Friday and Saturday this week, and then my tour kicks
Speaker 3: off and I'm off to like a million shows in
Speaker 3: the next couple of months and I'm really pumped for them.
Speaker 4: Best material yet. Come out and see me. Thanks for
Speaker 4: listening to pod today, Dumpika and listen to what Florence
Speaker 4: has to say. Oh stair Ships