1 00:00:03,440 --> 00:00:06,680 Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio. 2 00:00:09,240 --> 00:00:13,840 Speaker 1: Good Morning, This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. 3 00:00:14,560 --> 00:00:17,959 Speaker 1: Today's tip is to craft a good response to that 4 00:00:18,079 --> 00:00:22,360 Speaker 1: all too common question what do you do? In an 5 00:00:22,400 --> 00:00:26,960 Speaker 1: earlier episode of Before Breakfast, I suggested people not ask 6 00:00:27,080 --> 00:00:30,640 Speaker 1: this question as part of small talk. If your conversation 7 00:00:30,680 --> 00:00:33,879 Speaker 1: partner doesn't have a traditional job or isn't happy with 8 00:00:33,880 --> 00:00:38,040 Speaker 1: her job, it can be tricky to answer. It creates awkwardness, 9 00:00:38,680 --> 00:00:42,600 Speaker 1: which is not the point of small talk. That said, 10 00:00:42,680 --> 00:00:46,559 Speaker 1: although there are plenty of more engaging relationship building questions 11 00:00:46,600 --> 00:00:51,239 Speaker 1: people could ask, what do you do remains prevalent, so 12 00:00:51,320 --> 00:00:53,600 Speaker 1: you need to be ready to answer it well in 13 00:00:53,640 --> 00:00:57,200 Speaker 1: a way that communicates who you are and what you're accomplishing, 14 00:00:58,000 --> 00:01:00,800 Speaker 1: and maybe even how your conversation partner can support you 15 00:01:01,200 --> 00:01:04,960 Speaker 1: in your work. The most obvious way to respond to 16 00:01:05,000 --> 00:01:07,120 Speaker 1: what do you do, of course, is just with your 17 00:01:07,240 --> 00:01:11,120 Speaker 1: job function and perhaps also your employer. For some people 18 00:01:11,160 --> 00:01:14,760 Speaker 1: that works just fine. I'm a pediatrician or I'm a 19 00:01:14,800 --> 00:01:17,680 Speaker 1: pilot for fed X. Most people can figure those out. 20 00:01:18,800 --> 00:01:22,520 Speaker 1: Some people have jobs or employers that aren't familiar to others, 21 00:01:22,920 --> 00:01:25,120 Speaker 1: or might not capture what makes the work important to 22 00:01:25,160 --> 00:01:28,400 Speaker 1: that particular person. You might be a consultant, for instance, 23 00:01:28,480 --> 00:01:30,640 Speaker 1: or part of the gig economy, or you might be 24 00:01:30,640 --> 00:01:32,760 Speaker 1: looking for a job, so you might not have an 25 00:01:32,760 --> 00:01:36,920 Speaker 1: obvious answer. So in crafting response, I think it's helpful 26 00:01:36,959 --> 00:01:40,959 Speaker 1: to consider why people are asking this question, and usually 27 00:01:40,959 --> 00:01:44,080 Speaker 1: the question what do you do? Is intended to learn 28 00:01:44,120 --> 00:01:47,400 Speaker 1: more or to spark a conversation. If you don't have 29 00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:50,760 Speaker 1: a straightforward answer, you can try one of three approaches. 30 00:01:51,840 --> 00:01:54,720 Speaker 1: The first is to respond with a term that sums 31 00:01:54,840 --> 00:01:58,080 Speaker 1: up what you do. Let's say you're an extructional coach 32 00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:02,320 Speaker 1: for teachers and you write curriculum. Well, you're an educator, 33 00:02:02,600 --> 00:02:05,480 Speaker 1: So you can say that you play the oboe in 34 00:02:05,520 --> 00:02:08,160 Speaker 1: the symphony, teach music lessons, and are a paid singer 35 00:02:08,160 --> 00:02:11,800 Speaker 1: in a church choir. Well, you're a musician. Simple but 36 00:02:11,880 --> 00:02:15,520 Speaker 1: clear descriptions like these provide basic information about your work, 37 00:02:16,040 --> 00:02:18,560 Speaker 1: and they create an opening for your conversation partner to 38 00:02:18,600 --> 00:02:20,960 Speaker 1: ask more about it or to bring up a topic 39 00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:25,400 Speaker 1: of shared interest that your response suggested. Responding with a 40 00:02:25,440 --> 00:02:27,680 Speaker 1: simple summary of your work can also be helpful if 41 00:02:27,680 --> 00:02:30,000 Speaker 1: you have the kind of job that can trigger awkward 42 00:02:30,080 --> 00:02:33,400 Speaker 1: conversations that you'd rather avoid. Like let's say you're a 43 00:02:33,440 --> 00:02:36,880 Speaker 1: dermatologist who keeps getting asked to check out weird moles 44 00:02:36,919 --> 00:02:40,400 Speaker 1: at cocktail parties. Just say you work in healthcare and 45 00:02:40,480 --> 00:02:44,040 Speaker 1: move on to a new topic. Another option when you're 46 00:02:44,040 --> 00:02:47,440 Speaker 1: asked what do you do is to respond with your purpose? 47 00:02:48,320 --> 00:02:50,359 Speaker 1: What are you trying to accomplish in your life through 48 00:02:50,400 --> 00:02:53,760 Speaker 1: your work, whether that's paid or unpaid work, and perhaps 49 00:02:53,760 --> 00:02:56,560 Speaker 1: in other aspects of your life as well. Maybe you 50 00:02:56,680 --> 00:02:59,800 Speaker 1: volunteer extensively as a big brother or big sister and 51 00:03:00,000 --> 00:03:03,720 Speaker 1: serve on several youth focused nonprofit boards. You could describe 52 00:03:03,720 --> 00:03:06,320 Speaker 1: what you do is making sure that all kids have 53 00:03:06,480 --> 00:03:09,799 Speaker 1: what they need to thrive. You'll sometimes hear this sort 54 00:03:09,840 --> 00:03:13,520 Speaker 1: of response described as a personal mission statement. How will 55 00:03:13,560 --> 00:03:16,080 Speaker 1: the world be better because of what you're doing now? 56 00:03:16,120 --> 00:03:19,080 Speaker 1: You need to make sure the answer sounds authentic, but 57 00:03:19,360 --> 00:03:22,200 Speaker 1: done well, this approach can invite all sorts of follow 58 00:03:22,240 --> 00:03:25,840 Speaker 1: on questions that lead the conversation to much deeper places. 59 00:03:27,000 --> 00:03:29,640 Speaker 1: My third suggestion is to use the question as an 60 00:03:29,680 --> 00:03:33,080 Speaker 1: opportunity to invite your conversation partner to support you in 61 00:03:33,120 --> 00:03:37,200 Speaker 1: your work. If you're between jobs, say so and let 62 00:03:37,200 --> 00:03:40,600 Speaker 1: your conversation partner know what you're looking for. This also 63 00:03:40,680 --> 00:03:43,400 Speaker 1: works if you're a freelancer interested in getting more work, 64 00:03:43,960 --> 00:03:46,960 Speaker 1: or if your company wants to find new clients. Maybe 65 00:03:47,000 --> 00:03:49,760 Speaker 1: your company is recruiting for an open position and you'd 66 00:03:49,760 --> 00:03:53,320 Speaker 1: appreciate referrals of great talent. You might be planning your 67 00:03:53,320 --> 00:03:56,760 Speaker 1: first corporate retreat and want ideas for venues. Or maybe 68 00:03:56,800 --> 00:03:59,160 Speaker 1: you've got a big project in your personal life, like 69 00:03:59,240 --> 00:04:03,120 Speaker 1: your oldest kids applying to college, and you're interested in advice. 70 00:04:03,880 --> 00:04:08,360 Speaker 1: People like being helpful, which means that everybody wins. When 71 00:04:08,360 --> 00:04:12,000 Speaker 1: you answer this way, your conversation partner might introduce you 72 00:04:12,040 --> 00:04:14,760 Speaker 1: to someone else at the event, or suggest an idea 73 00:04:14,840 --> 00:04:17,560 Speaker 1: you hadn't thought of, or at least you've given the 74 00:04:17,600 --> 00:04:21,080 Speaker 1: person an opening to elaborate on a number of related topics. 75 00:04:22,160 --> 00:04:24,120 Speaker 1: The one caveat here is that your tone needs to 76 00:04:24,160 --> 00:04:29,240 Speaker 1: be invitational, not burdensome. You are inviting your partner to 77 00:04:29,279 --> 00:04:33,600 Speaker 1: offer ideas if they'd like to, if not, or otherwise 78 00:04:33,680 --> 00:04:36,440 Speaker 1: it's time to move on to a new topic. So 79 00:04:36,520 --> 00:04:39,120 Speaker 1: how do you respond when you're asked? What do you do? 80 00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:42,280 Speaker 1: Send me a note and let me know You can 81 00:04:42,320 --> 00:04:47,320 Speaker 1: reach me at Before Breakfast podcast at iHeart media dot com. 82 00:04:47,360 --> 00:04:51,480 Speaker 1: In the meantime, this is Laura. Thanks for listening and 83 00:04:51,520 --> 00:05:00,919 Speaker 1: here's to making the most of our time. Hey, everybody, 84 00:05:01,160 --> 00:05:03,279 Speaker 1: I'd love to hear from you. You can send me 85 00:05:03,320 --> 00:05:06,960 Speaker 1: your tips, your questions, or anything else. Just connect with 86 00:05:06,960 --> 00:05:11,360 Speaker 1: me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram at Before Breakfast Pod. 87 00:05:12,080 --> 00:05:16,400 Speaker 1: That's b E the number four, then Breakfast p o D. 88 00:05:17,240 --> 00:05:20,120 Speaker 1: You can also shoot me an email at Before Breakfast 89 00:05:20,200 --> 00:05:23,560 Speaker 1: podcast at i heeart media dot com that Before Breakfast 90 00:05:23,720 --> 00:05:26,280 Speaker 1: is spelled out with all the letters. Thanks so much, 91 00:05:26,480 --> 00:05:34,599 Speaker 1: I look forward to staying in touch. Before Breakfast is 92 00:05:34,600 --> 00:05:37,840 Speaker 1: a production of I Heart Radio. For more podcasts from 93 00:05:37,839 --> 00:05:41,840 Speaker 1: my heart Radio, visit the I heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, 94 00:05:42,120 --> 00:05:44,000 Speaker 1: or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.