1
00:00:02,680 --> 00:00:04,800
Speaker 1: Oh, I'm sorry, let me put my shirt back one.

2
00:00:05,800 --> 00:00:07,120
Speaker 2: Please do not edit this out.

3
00:00:07,680 --> 00:00:10,039
Speaker 1: I totally forgot that I had taken my shirt off.

4
00:00:10,119 --> 00:00:14,320
Speaker 1: It is so hot. I didn't. Okay, I had a

5
00:00:14,360 --> 00:00:15,080
Speaker 1: tank top one.

6
00:00:15,160 --> 00:00:17,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, I was going to clarify for those who are

7
00:00:17,040 --> 00:00:18,919
Speaker 3: only listening, she's not naked.

8
00:00:19,400 --> 00:00:21,520
Speaker 1: I had a wife lover tank top one. We don't

9
00:00:21,520 --> 00:00:25,800
Speaker 1: say wife beater anymore. But yeah. I went on a

10
00:00:25,840 --> 00:00:28,400
Speaker 1: walk right before we started recording, or we were set

11
00:00:28,440 --> 00:00:31,440
Speaker 1: to record, and I cannot cool down. It is so

12
00:00:31,880 --> 00:00:35,120
Speaker 1: hot in Nashville right now. I think it's hot everywhere.

13
00:00:35,400 --> 00:00:38,080
Speaker 2: I think. I think the world's just burning. Oh okay,

14
00:00:38,520 --> 00:00:42,120
Speaker 2: not to get political, but it is literally and figuratively

15
00:00:42,120 --> 00:00:42,760
Speaker 2: burning right now.

16
00:00:42,880 --> 00:00:46,519
Speaker 3: So she's well, I had a friend texting me from

17
00:00:46,520 --> 00:00:48,480
Speaker 3: Philly yesterday is like, it's so hot.

18
00:00:48,520 --> 00:00:51,280
Speaker 2: I was like, don't cry to me, because I'm melting

19
00:00:51,360 --> 00:00:51,840
Speaker 2: here too.

20
00:00:51,920 --> 00:00:53,120
Speaker 1: It has to be yeah, it has to be a

21
00:00:53,159 --> 00:00:55,520
Speaker 1: little bit cooler up there. You would hope you think

22
00:00:55,560 --> 00:00:59,320
Speaker 1: it's just also the humidity, because it'll say it's ninety four,

23
00:00:59,520 --> 00:01:02,440
Speaker 1: but it says then right under it, it says feels like.

24
00:01:02,400 --> 00:01:04,479
Speaker 2: It feels like one eighty seven.

25
00:01:06,920 --> 00:01:10,160
Speaker 1: It really does that. It does I cannot cool down.

26
00:01:10,319 --> 00:01:12,520
Speaker 3: I went and I went and saw Kesha on Monday,

27
00:01:12,600 --> 00:01:15,280
Speaker 3: and it was like, I basically wore booty shorts. I

28
00:01:15,319 --> 00:01:17,880
Speaker 3: was like, I don't want anything touching me. Like it's

29
00:01:18,240 --> 00:01:19,920
Speaker 3: because I would know I was going to be outside

30
00:01:19,920 --> 00:01:22,200
Speaker 3: in a crowd, and I was just like, oh my god,

31
00:01:22,240 --> 00:01:23,240
Speaker 3: it's gonna be so hot.

32
00:01:23,440 --> 00:01:25,679
Speaker 1: I can't imagine going to an outside concert right now.

33
00:01:25,959 --> 00:01:27,039
Speaker 1: No woof.

34
00:01:27,800 --> 00:01:29,880
Speaker 3: Well anyway, well please do for those of you listening,

35
00:01:29,959 --> 00:01:31,920
Speaker 3: don't use that as an excuse not to buy tickets.

36
00:01:32,360 --> 00:01:38,840
Speaker 1: You sorry, sorry, You're like, excuse me, that's bad for business. Yeah,

37
00:01:38,959 --> 00:01:41,440
Speaker 1: welcome back to Nashville. I know you were in Virginia

38
00:01:41,440 --> 00:01:43,440
Speaker 1: Beach and we were talking about this last week on

39
00:01:43,480 --> 00:01:45,959
Speaker 1: the podcast. It was your mom's eightieth birthday, two days

40
00:01:46,000 --> 00:01:49,960
Speaker 1: before my birthday, actually, my fellow cancer sister. Do you

41
00:01:50,040 --> 00:01:52,600
Speaker 1: want to tell the listeners what happened though, because this

42
00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:54,440
Speaker 1: story shifts me to my core.

43
00:01:54,920 --> 00:01:56,120
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh.

44
00:01:56,480 --> 00:02:00,960
Speaker 3: So my mother's birthday was July ninth. I had gone

45
00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:03,680
Speaker 3: home for the fourth of July. She's in Virginia that

46
00:02:03,760 --> 00:02:07,000
Speaker 3: my parents are in Virginia, and I'd gone home for

47
00:02:07,040 --> 00:02:09,200
Speaker 3: fourth of July and I was staying because I had

48
00:02:09,200 --> 00:02:11,320
Speaker 3: a work show on the tenth, and then we were

49
00:02:11,320 --> 00:02:14,440
Speaker 3: on the twelfth. We were having like a big we

50
00:02:14,480 --> 00:02:16,880
Speaker 3: call it Christmas in July, but we're doubling it as

51
00:02:16,919 --> 00:02:19,280
Speaker 3: my mom's eightieth birthday because it was the her eightieth

52
00:02:19,320 --> 00:02:20,120
Speaker 3: birthday on the ninth.

53
00:02:20,760 --> 00:02:22,560
Speaker 2: And you know, I brought my dogs with me.

54
00:02:22,600 --> 00:02:24,200
Speaker 3: I have a one year old boxer puppy and an

55
00:02:24,200 --> 00:02:27,639
Speaker 3: eight year old boxer dog. And when I got there,

56
00:02:27,680 --> 00:02:30,160
Speaker 3: I told my parents, like, hey, these dogs are going

57
00:02:30,200 --> 00:02:31,360
Speaker 3: to be laying around on the floor.

58
00:02:31,400 --> 00:02:32,240
Speaker 2: They are in the way.

59
00:02:32,400 --> 00:02:35,120
Speaker 3: It's just the way life is for this week. Be

60
00:02:35,240 --> 00:02:37,639
Speaker 3: cognizant of it. You're not in a hurry to go anywhere.

61
00:02:38,240 --> 00:02:40,839
Speaker 3: Do not step over these dogs because you don't move

62
00:02:40,919 --> 00:02:42,679
Speaker 3: like you used to. And the last thing I need

63
00:02:42,760 --> 00:02:48,079
Speaker 3: is for you to get hurt. Well, my hard headed mother,

64
00:02:48,120 --> 00:02:49,280
Speaker 3: thank god she's hard headed.

65
00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:50,959
Speaker 1: You'll see why.

66
00:02:50,960 --> 00:02:53,960
Speaker 3: You'll see why my hard headed mother decided to step

67
00:02:54,000 --> 00:02:57,120
Speaker 3: over the puppy. And when she did it, she also

68
00:02:57,200 --> 00:03:00,480
Speaker 3: stepped on his ball, which made him jump up. And

69
00:03:00,639 --> 00:03:04,400
Speaker 3: I was sitting in a chair and looked over. I

70
00:03:04,440 --> 00:03:07,760
Speaker 3: hear my mom scream, and then next thing, she's literally

71
00:03:07,760 --> 00:03:09,680
Speaker 3: flying by me like Superman in slow motion.

72
00:03:10,280 --> 00:03:13,040
Speaker 2: And she hit her head on the door. Yeah, I mean,

73
00:03:13,360 --> 00:03:15,800
Speaker 2: I don't know how she like her legs were. You know,

74
00:03:15,840 --> 00:03:17,560
Speaker 2: she was like spread over.

75
00:03:17,400 --> 00:03:19,840
Speaker 3: Him because she was stepping over him when he jumped up,

76
00:03:20,240 --> 00:03:22,720
Speaker 3: so he was able to like truly like lift her

77
00:03:22,720 --> 00:03:25,480
Speaker 3: in the air and throw her. And you know, she's

78
00:03:25,520 --> 00:03:27,800
Speaker 3: only five eleven, I mean four eleven, so she's not

79
00:03:27,840 --> 00:03:31,360
Speaker 3: a big woman. Ye know, Yeah, she's tiny, and so

80
00:03:32,120 --> 00:03:34,480
Speaker 3: he threw her into the door. Her head hit and

81
00:03:34,520 --> 00:03:37,480
Speaker 3: then she fell and her forehead hit the floor and

82
00:03:37,520 --> 00:03:40,040
Speaker 3: she just laid there still and it was silent, and

83
00:03:40,080 --> 00:03:40,400
Speaker 3: I was.

84
00:03:40,360 --> 00:03:42,800
Speaker 2: Like, mom, Mom, are you okay?

85
00:03:42,880 --> 00:03:45,040
Speaker 3: And she was just like just let me lay here.

86
00:03:45,040 --> 00:03:47,560
Speaker 3: So I knew she wasn't dead, which was good. And

87
00:03:47,600 --> 00:03:50,600
Speaker 3: then she slowly got up and she said she was fine.

88
00:03:50,640 --> 00:03:53,520
Speaker 3: There was no bruising, there was no bleeding, nothing felt broken.

89
00:03:54,360 --> 00:03:56,760
Speaker 2: And I was worried that she was concussed.

90
00:03:56,840 --> 00:03:59,000
Speaker 3: So I like made her like follow my finger and

91
00:03:59,080 --> 00:04:02,440
Speaker 3: like asked her some questions and she answered everything fine.

92
00:04:02,480 --> 00:04:03,640
Speaker 3: She was like, I'm gonna go about my day. I

93
00:04:03,680 --> 00:04:07,040
Speaker 3: got a party to work on, and she went about

94
00:04:07,040 --> 00:04:10,240
Speaker 3: her day. She made some cucumber salad, she made her bed.

95
00:04:10,360 --> 00:04:12,240
Speaker 3: She had gotten a new mattress that day, so she

96
00:04:12,240 --> 00:04:14,680
Speaker 3: had to remake her bed, and.

97
00:04:14,560 --> 00:04:17,080
Speaker 1: She was actually doing like manual yeah.

98
00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:17,679
Speaker 2: Manual labor.

99
00:04:17,760 --> 00:04:19,960
Speaker 3: I also was massaging her neck and making her do

100
00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:23,040
Speaker 3: like next stretching exercises. Like she said, she goes, there's

101
00:04:23,040 --> 00:04:24,839
Speaker 3: a little stiffed into my shoulders in my neck. But

102
00:04:24,880 --> 00:04:27,960
Speaker 3: I probably tensed up. And so she took a muscle relaxer.

103
00:04:28,120 --> 00:04:31,800
Speaker 3: And but she also had a couple of cocktails when

104
00:04:31,800 --> 00:04:34,120
Speaker 3: it became cocktail time. Then we went to dinner for

105
00:04:34,160 --> 00:04:36,640
Speaker 3: her birthday. She had another cocktail. Then we came home

106
00:04:36,680 --> 00:04:37,680
Speaker 3: and she slept all night.

107
00:04:37,880 --> 00:04:38,400
Speaker 2: The next morning.

108
00:04:38,440 --> 00:04:40,839
Speaker 1: I would imagine so on muscle relaxers.

109
00:04:40,440 --> 00:04:42,760
Speaker 3: In the mouse, right, Yeah, I should clarify. She did

110
00:04:42,839 --> 00:04:44,880
Speaker 3: not take the muscle relaxing until she was gone to bed.

111
00:04:44,960 --> 00:04:48,839
Speaker 3: She did not take it before drinking. I mean, she's

112
00:04:48,839 --> 00:04:49,640
Speaker 3: a party animal.

113
00:04:49,800 --> 00:04:53,200
Speaker 2: Wow. So we wake up the next day and her.

114
00:04:53,120 --> 00:04:56,599
Speaker 3: Face is black and blue like and I hate that

115
00:04:56,640 --> 00:04:59,080
Speaker 3: I'm laughing, but she she would be happy that I'm laughing.

116
00:04:59,160 --> 00:05:01,200
Speaker 1: It's startling to yeah, it's startling.

117
00:05:00,880 --> 00:05:01,720
Speaker 2: I mean black and blue.

118
00:05:01,720 --> 00:05:05,320
Speaker 3: And her forehead was had like this big huge swell

119
00:05:05,360 --> 00:05:08,839
Speaker 3: bump on it and I had a friend that was

120
00:05:08,880 --> 00:05:09,640
Speaker 3: coming into town.

121
00:05:09,720 --> 00:05:11,040
Speaker 2: So that was the day of the show.

122
00:05:11,040 --> 00:05:14,200
Speaker 3: That was now Thursday the tenth, and I had a

123
00:05:14,200 --> 00:05:15,919
Speaker 3: friend that was flying in for the party, but he

124
00:05:15,960 --> 00:05:16,680
Speaker 3: decided to come a.

125
00:05:16,720 --> 00:05:19,600
Speaker 2: Day early so that he could go to the dirt show.

126
00:05:20,080 --> 00:05:22,880
Speaker 3: And he walked into the house and I was like, oh, Dan,

127
00:05:22,960 --> 00:05:24,280
Speaker 3: I forgot you're an EMT.

128
00:05:24,480 --> 00:05:26,520
Speaker 2: You're a fireman. Well you look at my mom.

129
00:05:26,640 --> 00:05:28,760
Speaker 3: She fell and when he saw her, he like, his

130
00:05:28,800 --> 00:05:31,880
Speaker 3: first question was are you on blood thinners? And she

131
00:05:32,080 --> 00:05:35,159
Speaker 3: is because she's got hot blood pressure and he was like,

132
00:05:35,200 --> 00:05:37,400
Speaker 3: you have to go to the emergency room now, and

133
00:05:37,520 --> 00:05:40,760
Speaker 3: to which she responded, the hell I do like, and

134
00:05:40,839 --> 00:05:43,240
Speaker 3: he explained to her in a very like professional calm

135
00:05:43,320 --> 00:05:45,919
Speaker 3: way that you know, when you're on blood thinners, whenever

136
00:05:45,960 --> 00:05:48,240
Speaker 3: you hit your head, you have to go to the

137
00:05:48,240 --> 00:05:52,360
Speaker 3: hospital because if you cause your brain to bleed, you

138
00:05:52,400 --> 00:05:54,120
Speaker 3: could have it could give you a stroke, or you

139
00:05:54,120 --> 00:05:56,480
Speaker 3: could just die in your sleep. And it's not something

140
00:05:56,480 --> 00:05:58,040
Speaker 3: that you would ever feel. It doesn't hurt.

141
00:05:58,480 --> 00:05:59,560
Speaker 2: It just sneaks up on you.

142
00:05:59,680 --> 00:06:02,480
Speaker 3: And I didn't know that, you know, like, so well

143
00:06:02,480 --> 00:06:04,880
Speaker 3: you know this. I'm sharing this story because you know,

144
00:06:05,080 --> 00:06:07,159
Speaker 3: should any of you who are on blood thinners, or

145
00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:10,120
Speaker 3: any of your family or loved ones ever. Fall like

146
00:06:10,160 --> 00:06:12,760
Speaker 3: this is good information to have totally. So we went

147
00:06:12,800 --> 00:06:15,679
Speaker 3: to the hospital kicking and screaming. She was not happy

148
00:06:15,680 --> 00:06:16,840
Speaker 3: about having to go because.

149
00:06:16,600 --> 00:06:17,440
Speaker 2: She had so much naughter.

150
00:06:17,560 --> 00:06:18,480
Speaker 1: He told her that.

151
00:06:18,400 --> 00:06:20,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, she didn't want to. She was like, I'm not staying.

152
00:06:20,720 --> 00:06:23,280
Speaker 3: I don't care what they say. I'm not staying. She's like,

153
00:06:23,279 --> 00:06:24,920
Speaker 3: I've got a party with over one hundred people coming

154
00:06:24,920 --> 00:06:26,320
Speaker 3: to my house on Saturday, but I love.

155
00:06:26,279 --> 00:06:28,960
Speaker 1: That, Like this is what's what are is messed up

156
00:06:28,960 --> 00:06:31,039
Speaker 1: about us sometimes as we're like, I have a party

157
00:06:31,040 --> 00:06:32,800
Speaker 1: to plan and we're so worried about that, and well

158
00:06:32,839 --> 00:06:34,200
Speaker 1: you should worry about living.

159
00:06:34,120 --> 00:06:36,159
Speaker 3: Living and that's what we said to her, were like,

160
00:06:36,800 --> 00:06:38,560
Speaker 3: you know, you might not be alive for the party

161
00:06:38,600 --> 00:06:40,000
Speaker 3: if you don't like do what you need to do.

162
00:06:40,279 --> 00:06:41,599
Speaker 2: Right. So we get we get.

163
00:06:41,440 --> 00:06:43,840
Speaker 3: To the emergency room and she proceeds to tell everyone

164
00:06:43,839 --> 00:06:45,919
Speaker 3: that sees her that she's not spending the night, she

165
00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:48,640
Speaker 3: is not being admitted, but to do whatever they need

166
00:06:48,680 --> 00:06:51,080
Speaker 3: to do to get her through till She's like, if

167
00:06:51,120 --> 00:06:52,440
Speaker 3: you need to be come back on Sunday.

168
00:06:52,480 --> 00:06:54,599
Speaker 2: I'll do whatever you need. But get me to live

169
00:06:54,640 --> 00:06:55,000
Speaker 2: through them.

170
00:06:55,760 --> 00:06:57,920
Speaker 3: So they did a CT scan and they came back

171
00:06:57,960 --> 00:06:59,560
Speaker 3: and they said, well, the good news is you don't

172
00:06:59,560 --> 00:07:02,720
Speaker 3: have a brain. The madness is is you broke your neck.

173
00:07:03,440 --> 00:07:07,520
Speaker 3: And we were all like what. She fractured her C

174
00:07:07,720 --> 00:07:11,200
Speaker 3: two vertebrae, which is the second one down from your head,

175
00:07:11,840 --> 00:07:14,920
Speaker 3: and they were like, you might have to be rushed

176
00:07:14,920 --> 00:07:17,960
Speaker 3: to surgery, and she was like, I'm not having surgery today.

177
00:07:18,920 --> 00:07:21,200
Speaker 3: And the doctor that was on staff was like, look,

178
00:07:21,200 --> 00:07:23,600
Speaker 3: I'm not the neurosurgeon here. We don't even have one,

179
00:07:23,640 --> 00:07:26,720
Speaker 3: so we would have to transport you somewhere, but let's

180
00:07:26,880 --> 00:07:29,560
Speaker 3: wait until we hear back from the neurosurgeon once he's

181
00:07:29,560 --> 00:07:30,880
Speaker 3: seen the CT scan.

182
00:07:30,800 --> 00:07:32,680
Speaker 2: And blah blah blah. And my mom was like, I'm

183
00:07:32,680 --> 00:07:34,320
Speaker 2: not I'm definitely not having surgery here.

184
00:07:34,360 --> 00:07:36,080
Speaker 3: I'm definitely not going to the hospital that they would

185
00:07:36,240 --> 00:07:37,440
Speaker 3: they would transfer me to.

186
00:07:38,160 --> 00:07:39,960
Speaker 2: All the things, and I'm not spending the night.

187
00:07:40,840 --> 00:07:45,680
Speaker 3: And they, luckily, once the neurosurgery and called back, he said,

188
00:07:45,840 --> 00:07:48,400
Speaker 3: based on what he's seeing, he doesn't even think she'll

189
00:07:48,440 --> 00:07:50,440
Speaker 3: need surgery. But she has to wear a neck brace

190
00:07:50,520 --> 00:07:52,760
Speaker 3: for the next three months twenty four to seven, just

191
00:07:52,760 --> 00:07:53,600
Speaker 3: a shower.

192
00:07:53,240 --> 00:07:56,040
Speaker 1: In ite my gos so.

193
00:07:56,080 --> 00:08:00,440
Speaker 3: She has a consultation today, as the listeners are on Friday,

194
00:08:01,200 --> 00:08:05,920
Speaker 3: she has a consultation today with neurosurgeon and will know more.

195
00:08:06,560 --> 00:08:08,880
Speaker 3: But I'm hoping that it's not going to require surgery

196
00:08:08,920 --> 00:08:10,960
Speaker 3: because I feel like the recovery at eighty years old

197
00:08:10,960 --> 00:08:15,480
Speaker 3: from surgery will just complicate things. Plus it means, you know,

198
00:08:15,520 --> 00:08:17,560
Speaker 3: going under and having to spend the night at the

199
00:08:17,600 --> 00:08:20,000
Speaker 3: hospital and all the things. I mean, look, she is

200
00:08:20,040 --> 00:08:23,559
Speaker 3: a trooper. Like she went to that party, she didn't

201
00:08:23,640 --> 00:08:26,040
Speaker 3: drink because you know, we've we've got the fear of

202
00:08:26,040 --> 00:08:26,800
Speaker 3: life in her now.

203
00:08:27,320 --> 00:08:29,360
Speaker 2: Because it's as simple as.

204
00:08:29,160 --> 00:08:32,240
Speaker 3: Like her tripping over, you know, a piece of grass

205
00:08:32,360 --> 00:08:34,720
Speaker 3: or a stick or something in the yard. If you

206
00:08:34,920 --> 00:08:37,679
Speaker 3: fully break that second vertebrae is this is what all

207
00:08:37,679 --> 00:08:42,000
Speaker 3: the medical people told me. Most people die because it

208
00:08:42,080 --> 00:08:45,960
Speaker 3: inhibits your ability for your lungs to function. So you

209
00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:47,640
Speaker 3: you're either paralyzed or you're dead.

210
00:08:47,800 --> 00:08:48,520
Speaker 1: Oh my god.

211
00:08:48,840 --> 00:08:51,480
Speaker 3: And if you're long stop functioning. When you're paralyzed, you

212
00:08:51,480 --> 00:08:54,040
Speaker 3: have to be on a breathing machine. Like it's just awful.

213
00:08:54,720 --> 00:08:58,679
Speaker 3: So long story short, she's really lucky. She's I mean,

214
00:08:58,720 --> 00:09:00,680
Speaker 3: she looks like she got the shit kicked out of her,

215
00:09:01,120 --> 00:09:02,880
Speaker 3: and she was like, I tried to do We tried

216
00:09:02,880 --> 00:09:04,760
Speaker 3: to do everything. We were like, why don't we put

217
00:09:04,760 --> 00:09:07,080
Speaker 3: a boa on you or and we can get you know,

218
00:09:07,120 --> 00:09:08,800
Speaker 3: like we'll steal your makeup, and she's like, I don't

219
00:09:08,800 --> 00:09:11,240
Speaker 3: give a shit what I look like. She just wanted

220
00:09:11,240 --> 00:09:13,000
Speaker 3: to be at that party and see everybody. And she

221
00:09:13,080 --> 00:09:17,199
Speaker 3: stayed in one chair the whole time until karaoke started,

222
00:09:17,240 --> 00:09:19,120
Speaker 3: and then we moved her over to the karaoke area

223
00:09:19,400 --> 00:09:22,959
Speaker 3: and she didn't drink and she was She was literally

224
00:09:23,000 --> 00:09:24,679
Speaker 3: the last one to go to bed on Saturday night.

225
00:09:24,960 --> 00:09:26,560
Speaker 3: I had to be like, mom, go to bed so

226
00:09:26,640 --> 00:09:27,000
Speaker 3: I can.

227
00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:29,480
Speaker 1: She is a social butterfly.

228
00:09:29,120 --> 00:09:29,839
Speaker 2: She really is.

229
00:09:30,200 --> 00:09:33,320
Speaker 3: And yeah, so moral of the story is blood thinners.

230
00:09:33,400 --> 00:09:36,440
Speaker 3: If you fall and hit your head, get checked, and

231
00:09:36,720 --> 00:09:38,640
Speaker 3: don't let your parents step over your puppies.

232
00:09:39,120 --> 00:09:43,199
Speaker 1: Geez. I mean, well, obviously we're sending well wishes to Claudia,

233
00:09:43,240 --> 00:09:47,040
Speaker 1: but like the fact that that happened on her eightieth birthday,

234
00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:48,960
Speaker 1: it was just so startling. If you guys want to

235
00:09:48,960 --> 00:09:51,040
Speaker 1: see pictures of her, because she is black and blue,

236
00:09:51,120 --> 00:09:54,280
Speaker 1: Chip put someone on his Instagram. It's at Chip Doors. Yeah,

237
00:09:54,320 --> 00:09:56,559
Speaker 1: but I when I saw that picture, I mean, because

238
00:09:56,559 --> 00:09:58,280
Speaker 1: I saw her when you guys were in the hospital.

239
00:09:58,320 --> 00:10:00,640
Speaker 1: I saw a picture from there. She was not she

240
00:10:00,760 --> 00:10:03,760
Speaker 1: was not bruised. It wasn't bruised yet, and then you

241
00:10:03,840 --> 00:10:06,560
Speaker 1: posted that picture. It looks almost like she has sunglasses on.

242
00:10:06,760 --> 00:10:09,679
Speaker 3: Well, she she had glasses on, so when she fell,

243
00:10:09,800 --> 00:10:11,920
Speaker 3: like the top of her head hit the door and

244
00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:15,760
Speaker 3: then she went just dropped flat, and her glasses then

245
00:10:16,240 --> 00:10:17,080
Speaker 3: got her face.

246
00:10:17,440 --> 00:10:19,920
Speaker 2: But I also, like, I didn't even know what bruising was.

247
00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:22,640
Speaker 3: And my friend Dan explained, He was like, you know,

248
00:10:22,760 --> 00:10:25,360
Speaker 3: whenever you get hit hard, blood vessels break, and that's

249
00:10:25,440 --> 00:10:26,640
Speaker 3: just blood under the skin.

250
00:10:26,800 --> 00:10:28,320
Speaker 2: It's just like internal bleeding.

251
00:10:29,040 --> 00:10:32,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, so gravity pushes it down too, So anything that

252
00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:36,079
Speaker 3: was damaged up here, like on her forehead, the blood

253
00:10:36,160 --> 00:10:39,400
Speaker 3: drained into like her eye sockets and stuff. So I mean,

254
00:10:39,440 --> 00:10:43,840
Speaker 3: it was crazy, and it got worse the next day, Like, yeah.

255
00:10:43,640 --> 00:10:46,040
Speaker 1: The next day was worse. I think, like the day

256
00:10:46,320 --> 00:10:48,320
Speaker 1: on the eleventh when you guys had the party, which

257
00:10:48,360 --> 00:10:49,360
Speaker 1: was my birthday.

258
00:10:49,840 --> 00:10:50,440
Speaker 2: It was bad.

259
00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:54,240
Speaker 1: It was so bad, so bad. Anyway, Well, I hope

260
00:10:54,280 --> 00:10:56,880
Speaker 1: she recovers, and I can't imagine a brace for three months,

261
00:10:56,880 --> 00:10:58,320
Speaker 1: but it does make sense in a lot of ways

262
00:10:58,320 --> 00:10:59,960
Speaker 1: because you don't. It's like when you injure your back,

263
00:11:00,120 --> 00:11:02,960
Speaker 1: you don't realize every move is tied to like your

264
00:11:03,000 --> 00:11:05,520
Speaker 1: back and your neck, and so anything hurts, and so

265
00:11:05,559 --> 00:11:08,400
Speaker 1: I could see why she would need that protection from

266
00:11:08,440 --> 00:11:09,680
Speaker 1: not moving it a certain way.

267
00:11:09,800 --> 00:11:13,040
Speaker 3: Well, because you also, like, we're so I mean, I

268
00:11:13,040 --> 00:11:14,760
Speaker 3: hate to say we take our bodies for granted, but

269
00:11:14,800 --> 00:11:16,960
Speaker 3: we do, like, of course we don't have to think

270
00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:19,000
Speaker 3: about all of the things that we do, but like

271
00:11:19,280 --> 00:11:21,800
Speaker 3: something as simple as dropping a piece of paper, like

272
00:11:22,440 --> 00:11:24,280
Speaker 3: and not bend over and pick that up like you

273
00:11:24,360 --> 00:11:27,360
Speaker 3: normally would if you've got a broken neck. And you know,

274
00:11:27,400 --> 00:11:29,480
Speaker 3: my sister the next day called her on a stepstool

275
00:11:29,520 --> 00:11:31,760
Speaker 3: trying to get some paper towels down from a show.

276
00:11:31,760 --> 00:11:34,559
Speaker 1: Lost her day mind, Oh my god.

277
00:11:34,840 --> 00:11:38,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, So it's just like and she's not thinking that,

278
00:11:38,600 --> 00:11:39,360
Speaker 3: and that's what it is.

279
00:11:39,400 --> 00:11:40,719
Speaker 2: She's just not thinking.

280
00:11:40,360 --> 00:11:44,400
Speaker 3: About, like really what the repercussions are if she gets

281
00:11:44,480 --> 00:11:45,040
Speaker 3: hurt again.

282
00:11:45,679 --> 00:11:47,920
Speaker 2: And you know, it's natural to want to just be

283
00:11:47,960 --> 00:11:48,880
Speaker 2: able to do what you can.

284
00:11:48,800 --> 00:11:51,680
Speaker 1: Do well, and we're all kind of stubborn. I think

285
00:11:51,960 --> 00:11:54,960
Speaker 1: she's like stubborn when you need to stop and sit.

286
00:11:55,520 --> 00:11:58,280
Speaker 1: It's sometimes so hard to get yourself to do that.

287
00:11:58,280 --> 00:12:01,040
Speaker 1: That always happens with me. I was having those back spasms.

288
00:12:01,080 --> 00:12:03,280
Speaker 1: Do you remember that that for that week that was

289
00:12:03,360 --> 00:12:07,680
Speaker 1: last summer. And it took that truly, like I was

290
00:12:07,840 --> 00:12:11,040
Speaker 1: rendered so incapable of moving, and it took that for

291
00:12:11,080 --> 00:12:13,520
Speaker 1: me to just stop because I couldn't, like I just

292
00:12:13,600 --> 00:12:16,240
Speaker 1: could not move. And every time I would move even

293
00:12:16,240 --> 00:12:18,480
Speaker 1: the wrong, like in the slightest wrong way, in my

294
00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:21,840
Speaker 1: back would spasm again. It was so painful. So yeah, anyway,

295
00:12:21,840 --> 00:12:23,840
Speaker 1: maybe she's just supposed to sit and reflect on some

296
00:12:23,880 --> 00:12:24,720
Speaker 1: things right now.

297
00:12:24,920 --> 00:12:28,640
Speaker 3: Well I'm hoping too, because you know, if this feels irresponsible,

298
00:12:28,640 --> 00:12:31,120
Speaker 3: but the doctor told her that she's still allowed to drive.

299
00:12:30,880 --> 00:12:32,120
Speaker 2: But we're telling her not.

300
00:12:32,120 --> 00:12:34,400
Speaker 3: To because yeah, all it takes is a dog running

301
00:12:34,400 --> 00:12:36,000
Speaker 3: out in front of you and you slam on the

302
00:12:36,040 --> 00:12:38,480
Speaker 3: brakes and you've thrown your neck out. But you know,

303
00:12:38,520 --> 00:12:40,600
Speaker 3: I said, look, this is an opportunity for you to

304
00:12:40,679 --> 00:12:42,600
Speaker 3: like make some changes, like you don't need to go

305
00:12:42,640 --> 00:12:45,960
Speaker 3: to the grocery store, like you can order everything online

306
00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:47,280
Speaker 3: and have a friend pick it up for you. And

307
00:12:47,280 --> 00:12:48,960
Speaker 3: she's like, yeah, but I like to touch my own fruit.

308
00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:52,320
Speaker 3: And I was like, well, this is three months. Yeah,

309
00:12:52,360 --> 00:12:55,400
Speaker 3: maybe you'll learn that you really actually like having everything

310
00:12:55,440 --> 00:12:56,840
Speaker 3: packed up for you so you don't have to go

311
00:12:56,880 --> 00:12:59,559
Speaker 3: spend an hour the grocery store and you can order

312
00:12:59,559 --> 00:13:01,560
Speaker 3: all the pack goods and then you go pick out.

313
00:13:01,400 --> 00:13:03,320
Speaker 2: Your fruit and your vegetables and that's all you have

314
00:13:03,360 --> 00:13:03,640
Speaker 2: to do.

315
00:13:03,920 --> 00:13:04,160
Speaker 1: Yeah.

316
00:13:04,440 --> 00:13:05,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's a good idea.

317
00:13:05,480 --> 00:13:08,760
Speaker 3: So I'm hoping that like this isn't me just like

318
00:13:08,880 --> 00:13:11,080
Speaker 3: yelling at my mom and trying to get her to

319
00:13:11,080 --> 00:13:14,160
Speaker 3: behave and it's more about like me reframing things for

320
00:13:14,200 --> 00:13:18,920
Speaker 3: her because she she's just also habitual, like she's still

321
00:13:18,960 --> 00:13:22,079
Speaker 3: doesn't text, she doesn't have an ATM card, she doesn't

322
00:13:22,120 --> 00:13:24,240
Speaker 3: want to progress and anyway, she just likes to do

323
00:13:24,320 --> 00:13:26,120
Speaker 3: things her way. And I think this is kind of

324
00:13:26,160 --> 00:13:28,920
Speaker 3: an interesting time to like, you know, teach her.

325
00:13:28,840 --> 00:13:32,240
Speaker 2: Some convenient things that have you know, progressed and changed

326
00:13:32,280 --> 00:13:34,199
Speaker 2: since she was born a million years.

327
00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:37,520
Speaker 1: Ago eighty to be exact.

328
00:13:38,840 --> 00:13:39,040
Speaker 2: Yeah.

329
00:13:39,600 --> 00:13:42,040
Speaker 1: Wow, Well, I really hope she gets well soon, and

330
00:13:42,080 --> 00:13:44,960
Speaker 1: obviously we'll need the updates from you as they come.

331
00:13:45,440 --> 00:13:47,600
Speaker 1: But I like the reframe too. I mean it always,

332
00:13:47,640 --> 00:13:49,560
Speaker 1: like we always say on this podcast, there is a

333
00:13:49,640 --> 00:13:52,800
Speaker 1: learning opportunity in every situation if you allow yourself to

334
00:13:52,840 --> 00:13:56,439
Speaker 1: go there. So maybe this is her time. Yeah, yeah,

335
00:13:56,600 --> 00:13:58,880
Speaker 1: Well the eleventh was a big day, and I mean,

336
00:13:58,920 --> 00:14:01,280
Speaker 1: I can't that was my birthday, seven eleven. It's hard

337
00:14:01,320 --> 00:14:04,640
Speaker 1: to forget. But I was on set actually all day

338
00:14:04,679 --> 00:14:07,520
Speaker 1: that day. I was working. This story is so crazy

339
00:14:08,960 --> 00:14:12,240
Speaker 1: and I'm not so sure. I did not work with

340
00:14:12,280 --> 00:14:26,840
Speaker 1: Elvis Presley. I got called to work on this job

341
00:14:27,280 --> 00:14:30,760
Speaker 1: with this man named Bob Joyce, and he's a pastor

342
00:14:30,960 --> 00:14:35,680
Speaker 1: in Arkansas. And if anyone's on TikTok or knows anything

343
00:14:35,720 --> 00:14:39,000
Speaker 1: about this story, you know that there's a conspiracy theory

344
00:14:39,040 --> 00:14:41,800
Speaker 1: that says he is Elvis, that Elvis did not die,

345
00:14:41,840 --> 00:14:45,200
Speaker 1: he faked his own death, and Bob Joyce is Elvis,

346
00:14:45,320 --> 00:14:48,240
Speaker 1: but doesn't want any of the fame or notoriety, and

347
00:14:48,320 --> 00:14:51,440
Speaker 1: so he's, you know, doing what he believes is the

348
00:14:51,480 --> 00:14:54,720
Speaker 1: work that God wanted Elvis to do. He says that,

349
00:14:55,360 --> 00:14:58,160
Speaker 1: but he does not say he's Elvis. So I know

350
00:14:58,200 --> 00:15:01,280
Speaker 1: it sounds crazy. I don't typically believe conspiracy theories, Like

351
00:15:01,360 --> 00:15:03,680
Speaker 1: I am not that person. I always when people are

352
00:15:03,680 --> 00:15:05,760
Speaker 1: like Britney's Bears is a clone, I'm like, no, she's not.

353
00:15:05,960 --> 00:15:07,840
Speaker 1: She's just on drugs, you know, like that's why she

354
00:15:07,840 --> 00:15:12,720
Speaker 1: looks so different. But I left this situation. I got home.

355
00:15:12,840 --> 00:15:14,840
Speaker 1: My boyfriend was here and he was like, you looked

356
00:15:14,880 --> 00:15:18,120
Speaker 1: like you'd seen a ghost and you truly believed that

357
00:15:18,120 --> 00:15:21,640
Speaker 1: that was Elvis. Like once I left, it was crazy.

358
00:15:21,960 --> 00:15:22,160
Speaker 2: Yeah.

359
00:15:22,160 --> 00:15:24,200
Speaker 1: Oh, I mean, I know I sound insane, but like

360
00:15:24,200 --> 00:15:26,680
Speaker 1: there's all these weird things. The only thing I cannot

361
00:15:26,720 --> 00:15:29,800
Speaker 1: wrap my mind around is that Elvis would be ninety

362
00:15:30,040 --> 00:15:32,240
Speaker 1: and so like I didn't really find Bob to be

363
00:15:33,040 --> 00:15:35,840
Speaker 1: moving in the way that I would think a ninety

364
00:15:35,880 --> 00:15:38,840
Speaker 1: year old would. My grandmother's ninety, like Elvis was actually

365
00:15:38,880 --> 00:15:40,960
Speaker 1: born a couple of days after her, and so like

366
00:15:41,040 --> 00:15:43,600
Speaker 1: I was comparing it to that, but she does have Alzheimer's.

367
00:15:43,600 --> 00:15:45,360
Speaker 1: So I'm like, I don't know if I'm getting you know,

368
00:15:45,440 --> 00:15:47,960
Speaker 1: like every person is different and what does ninety look

369
00:15:48,040 --> 00:15:50,560
Speaker 1: like for everybody? But I still don't really, I don't

370
00:15:50,560 --> 00:15:52,040
Speaker 1: know there's some weird connection.

371
00:15:52,480 --> 00:15:53,880
Speaker 2: Did you listen to the music?

372
00:15:54,760 --> 00:15:57,320
Speaker 1: Well? He yeah, I mean we didn't. I didn't hear

373
00:15:57,320 --> 00:15:59,560
Speaker 1: his album, but like he played the piano right in

374
00:15:59,600 --> 00:16:01,640
Speaker 1: front of me, and it was freaky because it was

375
00:16:01,800 --> 00:16:05,640
Speaker 1: very soulful, like someone goes wait, you played the piano right,

376
00:16:05,680 --> 00:16:07,320
Speaker 1: because they were doing a shot right in front of

377
00:16:07,360 --> 00:16:09,080
Speaker 1: the piano and sat He was like, yeah, a little bit,

378
00:16:09,080 --> 00:16:11,240
Speaker 1: and he sat down and he played literally what I

379
00:16:11,280 --> 00:16:15,080
Speaker 1: would imagine Elvis was the tale play. But the reason

380
00:16:15,160 --> 00:16:18,680
Speaker 1: people think this, I can't remember exactly where it started.

381
00:16:19,200 --> 00:16:22,600
Speaker 1: But there are like six years in Bob's life right

382
00:16:22,640 --> 00:16:26,600
Speaker 1: after Elvis died where there's no documentation of where Bob was. Like,

383
00:16:27,200 --> 00:16:29,280
Speaker 1: there's this really weird thing with that. There's this other

384
00:16:29,320 --> 00:16:32,520
Speaker 1: connection of there's a vein pattern on his left hand

385
00:16:32,640 --> 00:16:36,520
Speaker 1: that's exactly the same as Elvis's. There's a scar where

386
00:16:36,560 --> 00:16:38,760
Speaker 1: Elvis had had wounding on his right hand. Bob has

387
00:16:38,760 --> 00:16:42,280
Speaker 1: a scar in the exact same spot. He's married to

388
00:16:42,680 --> 00:16:45,400
Speaker 1: this woman who actually met she was there, who dated

389
00:16:45,440 --> 00:16:48,520
Speaker 1: Elvis when he was off at war. I guess that

390
00:16:48,600 --> 00:16:52,840
Speaker 1: was World War two, and that's who Bob's married to. Now.

391
00:16:53,760 --> 00:16:58,520
Speaker 1: He sounds just like him when he sings. He's the

392
00:16:58,560 --> 00:17:02,400
Speaker 1: same height, same shoe side. There are rumors that he

393
00:17:02,440 --> 00:17:05,040
Speaker 1: was at Lisa Marie Presley's funeral, but then I saw

394
00:17:05,080 --> 00:17:07,639
Speaker 1: this one article that said that was a songwriter that

395
00:17:07,880 --> 00:17:10,639
Speaker 1: just looked like him and not him. But the week

396
00:17:10,680 --> 00:17:15,520
Speaker 1: that Lisa Marie died. Apparently he gave a sermon and

397
00:17:16,320 --> 00:17:19,320
Speaker 1: like halfway through it was did like ten minutes about

398
00:17:19,359 --> 00:17:22,240
Speaker 1: the topic of lost, kind of randomly within the sermon

399
00:17:22,600 --> 00:17:26,240
Speaker 1: and could not stop crying. And so everyone was like, uh,

400
00:17:26,280 --> 00:17:28,800
Speaker 1: you know, just weird like that. I'm trying to think

401
00:17:28,840 --> 00:17:30,320
Speaker 1: of some of the other stuff. I mean, if you

402
00:17:30,320 --> 00:17:32,840
Speaker 1: guys google it, it is all over the internet. I

403
00:17:32,880 --> 00:17:35,280
Speaker 1: had no idea, and so when I get there, these

404
00:17:35,320 --> 00:17:39,399
Speaker 1: people are kind of almost like, should we tell her

405
00:17:39,480 --> 00:17:41,440
Speaker 1: to google him about me? And I was like, oh,

406
00:17:41,440 --> 00:17:43,320
Speaker 1: I google him, you know, because I always google new

407
00:17:43,320 --> 00:17:45,680
Speaker 1: people just to see what they look like. And they

408
00:17:45,680 --> 00:17:48,480
Speaker 1: were like, oh, well, so do you know about the

409
00:17:48,520 --> 00:17:50,720
Speaker 1: Elvis stuff? And I was like, oh, yeah, I saw

410
00:17:50,760 --> 00:17:53,760
Speaker 1: that there's a conspiracy theory about that. And they all

411
00:17:53,760 --> 00:17:56,600
Speaker 1: got silent and just looked at me, and I was like,

412
00:17:57,000 --> 00:17:59,480
Speaker 1: why are you guys being weird all of a sudden,

413
00:18:00,440 --> 00:18:04,320
Speaker 1: and they said, well, it is Elvis, like dead serious

414
00:18:04,400 --> 00:18:06,480
Speaker 1: to me, I thought they were fucking with me. I

415
00:18:06,520 --> 00:18:10,520
Speaker 1: could not like get over it. And yeah, there was

416
00:18:10,560 --> 00:18:12,480
Speaker 1: like went on on and on to tell me all

417
00:18:12,520 --> 00:18:16,639
Speaker 1: these different things and these weird connections to Elvis. I

418
00:18:16,640 --> 00:18:18,719
Speaker 1: don't know, he looks different, and so I was like,

419
00:18:18,760 --> 00:18:20,240
Speaker 1: I don't really know that. I feel like I feel

420
00:18:20,280 --> 00:18:24,160
Speaker 1: like it looks more like Kenny Rogers or something. Yeah,

421
00:18:24,400 --> 00:18:27,000
Speaker 1: and they were like, well, he's had work done, we

422
00:18:27,040 --> 00:18:30,159
Speaker 1: think to kind you know, obviously hide the Elvis thing.

423
00:18:30,200 --> 00:18:33,439
Speaker 1: They said, Elvis was in so much trouble with like

424
00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:36,240
Speaker 1: or he was so trapped. If anyone's seen the Elvis movie.

425
00:18:36,280 --> 00:18:39,640
Speaker 1: There was that colonel guy who was his manager, and

426
00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:42,640
Speaker 1: he had him to where he was doing this residency

427
00:18:42,800 --> 00:18:45,560
Speaker 1: like basically like a slave, like he couldn't leave, he

428
00:18:45,640 --> 00:18:48,680
Speaker 1: couldn't do any other shows. He had to do that show,

429
00:18:48,840 --> 00:18:51,119
Speaker 1: like he had no autonomy, and he wasn't really making

430
00:18:51,160 --> 00:18:53,480
Speaker 1: that much money. I think, like the colonel was taking

431
00:18:53,480 --> 00:18:55,720
Speaker 1: all his money. But he was also like so he

432
00:18:55,800 --> 00:18:58,600
Speaker 1: was in all this debt, but also like the mafia

433
00:18:58,760 --> 00:19:01,520
Speaker 1: was tied to that somehow. And so then the colonel

434
00:19:01,640 --> 00:19:04,640
Speaker 1: decided that Elvis was worth more to him dead than alive.

435
00:19:05,680 --> 00:19:08,720
Speaker 1: And so he said, sure, we can like fake your

436
00:19:08,720 --> 00:19:11,680
Speaker 1: death and I'll as long as I have ownership over

437
00:19:11,720 --> 00:19:14,280
Speaker 1: like Elvis Presley Enterprises, which he did for a long

438
00:19:14,320 --> 00:19:16,879
Speaker 1: time because he was like, if he dies, then I'll

439
00:19:17,160 --> 00:19:20,240
Speaker 1: quote if he quote unquote dies, then I'll make a

440
00:19:20,280 --> 00:19:20,919
Speaker 1: bunch of money.

441
00:19:21,320 --> 00:19:22,600
Speaker 2: Yeah. I mean yeah you can.

442
00:19:22,720 --> 00:19:24,320
Speaker 3: You can still do a lot of the things and

443
00:19:24,359 --> 00:19:25,480
Speaker 3: you don't have the costs.

444
00:19:25,680 --> 00:19:27,960
Speaker 1: Yeah. And then Elvis just didn't want to be in

445
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:30,840
Speaker 1: that anymore, didn't obviously was in danger with the mafia

446
00:19:32,080 --> 00:19:34,760
Speaker 1: and didn't want the fame or any of that. Like

447
00:19:34,800 --> 00:19:36,920
Speaker 1: he just wanted you know, he's all. He was actually

448
00:19:37,040 --> 00:19:40,800
Speaker 1: very religious. They also told me that like Lisa, Marie, Priscilla,

449
00:19:41,520 --> 00:19:45,199
Speaker 1: Linda Thompson, Riley Kiok, they all know, like this is

450
00:19:45,240 --> 00:19:47,200
Speaker 1: like a known thing, but they.

451
00:19:47,560 --> 00:19:50,840
Speaker 3: Station because that would be my question is why would

452
00:19:50,880 --> 00:19:51,920
Speaker 3: you ever choose.

453
00:19:51,680 --> 00:19:53,880
Speaker 2: To like leave your fabandon your family.

454
00:19:54,040 --> 00:19:56,800
Speaker 1: Priscilla. They said Priscilla was an arranged marriage, like it

455
00:19:56,920 --> 00:20:00,000
Speaker 1: was never a real love story thing. Like it was

456
00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:03,000
Speaker 1: very much this arranged thing. And she's still trying to

457
00:20:03,080 --> 00:20:07,320
Speaker 1: like milk that whole thing and get money. Bob himself

458
00:20:07,480 --> 00:20:11,240
Speaker 1: doesn't take any money from like the records that he

459
00:20:11,320 --> 00:20:13,639
Speaker 1: puts out or anything. I guess he just takes it.

460
00:20:13,640 --> 00:20:16,000
Speaker 1: He lives in like a three bedroom, two bath house,

461
00:20:16,080 --> 00:20:19,679
Speaker 1: like a normal house in Arkansas. And they're like he

462
00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:23,240
Speaker 1: makes all this money on these albums and in different

463
00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:25,320
Speaker 1: ways in the church or whatever, because I guess his

464
00:20:25,400 --> 00:20:28,719
Speaker 1: church is pretty successful. But he doesn't take any of that,

465
00:20:28,880 --> 00:20:31,000
Speaker 1: Like he just takes enough to live on and he

466
00:20:31,040 --> 00:20:34,320
Speaker 1: doesn't want, you know, like he's he's everything he does

467
00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:37,119
Speaker 1: is of service. And I gotta tell you guys, Okay,

468
00:20:37,160 --> 00:20:39,640
Speaker 1: So you know, I'm pretty intuitive and like my body

469
00:20:39,680 --> 00:20:44,479
Speaker 1: does weird things when I know stuff. And I found

470
00:20:44,480 --> 00:20:47,639
Speaker 1: myself obviously like it was weird hearing these stories. But

471
00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:49,560
Speaker 1: I was kind of like I kept saying to the people,

472
00:20:49,840 --> 00:20:51,920
Speaker 1: are you all messing with me? Like I could not,

473
00:20:52,359 --> 00:20:53,879
Speaker 1: you know, I just felt like they were trying to

474
00:20:53,920 --> 00:20:57,359
Speaker 1: punk me or like I could whatever. Then the people

475
00:20:57,400 --> 00:21:00,000
Speaker 1: there's also forgot to mention there's people shooting a documentary

476
00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:02,360
Speaker 1: about this right now, and so they kind of came too,

477
00:21:02,640 --> 00:21:04,480
Speaker 1: and I was like, well, why would Bob agree to

478
00:21:04,520 --> 00:21:08,639
Speaker 1: do this documentary if he doesn't want people to know

479
00:21:08,720 --> 00:21:11,280
Speaker 1: he's elvis or whatever, And so I can't really fully

480
00:21:11,359 --> 00:21:13,680
Speaker 1: grasp all of that. But this documentary will come out

481
00:21:13,720 --> 00:21:16,080
Speaker 1: in like a year. I'm trying to get them to

482
00:21:16,080 --> 00:21:17,639
Speaker 1: come on the podcast and it comes out so they

483
00:21:17,640 --> 00:21:21,480
Speaker 1: can tell us more. But anyway, he after they're telling

484
00:21:21,520 --> 00:21:23,760
Speaker 1: me some of the things. When he gets there, they like,

485
00:21:23,800 --> 00:21:26,159
Speaker 1: stop talking about it. Obviously. It's like, so it's this

486
00:21:26,240 --> 00:21:29,040
Speaker 1: really weird thing. Like we weren't actually able to openly

487
00:21:29,080 --> 00:21:31,080
Speaker 1: speak about it very much. So I was getting bits

488
00:21:31,119 --> 00:21:35,280
Speaker 1: and pieces throughout the day. And when he got there,

489
00:21:36,200 --> 00:21:41,840
Speaker 1: I got so nervous, like, quote unquote seventy three year

490
00:21:41,840 --> 00:21:43,560
Speaker 1: old man, we don't actually know how Aldio is, but

491
00:21:43,560 --> 00:21:46,879
Speaker 1: that's what they say Bob is. And that's not typically

492
00:21:46,920 --> 00:21:49,159
Speaker 1: like I work with pretty big artists, Like there's not

493
00:21:49,520 --> 00:21:53,000
Speaker 1: that's not typically a type of person who would kind

494
00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:55,560
Speaker 1: of make me star struck or weird. But I definitely

495
00:21:55,560 --> 00:21:58,800
Speaker 1: got nervous, and I got like, I don't know, I

496
00:21:58,840 --> 00:22:01,520
Speaker 1: couldn't tell. Why tell if it's because he doesn't really

497
00:22:01,640 --> 00:22:05,280
Speaker 1: like people touching him or you know, like things like that,

498
00:22:05,800 --> 00:22:09,160
Speaker 1: or if it was because he's Elvis, I don't know.

499
00:22:09,359 --> 00:22:11,840
Speaker 1: But my body definitely got nervous. And then at the

500
00:22:12,040 --> 00:22:14,439
Speaker 1: end he came up to me and he was like,

501
00:22:15,320 --> 00:22:17,720
Speaker 1: remind me your name again, and I said Kelly, and

502
00:22:17,760 --> 00:22:19,320
Speaker 1: he was telling me thank you and stuff, and he

503
00:22:19,400 --> 00:22:21,520
Speaker 1: was but he was looking me in the eyes and

504
00:22:21,560 --> 00:22:25,240
Speaker 1: I wanted to cry. And when my body knows something's true,

505
00:22:25,320 --> 00:22:27,560
Speaker 1: it wants to like I start crying, like if I

506
00:22:27,640 --> 00:22:31,080
Speaker 1: get an intuitive hit or if I'm in like a

507
00:22:31,160 --> 00:22:33,639
Speaker 1: session of I don't know. I'm trying to think, like

508
00:22:33,680 --> 00:22:35,880
Speaker 1: if I do any sort of healing session and someone says,

509
00:22:35,920 --> 00:22:38,760
Speaker 1: well it could be that blah blah blah blah blah

510
00:22:38,800 --> 00:22:41,520
Speaker 1: and it's true, I start crying. And it's because it's

511
00:22:41,520 --> 00:22:46,440
Speaker 1: like a recognition thing, I think. And that happened, So.

512
00:22:46,640 --> 00:22:48,600
Speaker 3: I don't did he ask you why you were crying

513
00:22:48,680 --> 00:22:49,960
Speaker 3: or did you I didn't cry.

514
00:22:50,000 --> 00:22:51,800
Speaker 1: I just teared up, and I was like, I gotta

515
00:22:51,840 --> 00:22:54,080
Speaker 1: walk away from him. It's like weird.

516
00:22:55,280 --> 00:22:56,399
Speaker 2: I don't be sad.

517
00:22:56,920 --> 00:23:00,879
Speaker 1: Yeah. My agent was basically like, well, obviously tell everyone

518
00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:01,720
Speaker 1: you've worked to tell me.

519
00:23:01,960 --> 00:23:04,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, let's put that on the resume. Yeah, I mean,

520
00:23:04,880 --> 00:23:05,679
Speaker 2: here's the question.

521
00:23:06,840 --> 00:23:09,399
Speaker 3: And this isn't me like saying you should have done it,

522
00:23:09,440 --> 00:23:12,240
Speaker 3: but like, why not just ask him?

523
00:23:12,280 --> 00:23:14,840
Speaker 1: Like I could tell that they were not wanting to

524
00:23:14,880 --> 00:23:17,520
Speaker 1: talk about it in front of him, And I guess.

525
00:23:17,080 --> 00:23:19,520
Speaker 2: Who were these people? Like were they people on his team?

526
00:23:19,800 --> 00:23:20,040
Speaker 3: Yeah?

527
00:23:20,040 --> 00:23:21,760
Speaker 1: Really, I don't know. Yeah, they're on his team. I

528
00:23:21,840 --> 00:23:24,400
Speaker 1: don't really know what their role was. There was this

529
00:23:24,560 --> 00:23:27,679
Speaker 1: married couple that they were older. I don't know if

530
00:23:27,680 --> 00:23:29,879
Speaker 1: they were like friends or they were on his team,

531
00:23:30,359 --> 00:23:33,919
Speaker 1: but his there was a daughter, a step daughter there,

532
00:23:34,560 --> 00:23:36,800
Speaker 1: and that was weird because they were like doing air

533
00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:39,560
Speaker 1: quotes around step daughter, like maybe it's his real I

534
00:23:39,560 --> 00:23:41,760
Speaker 1: don't know. The timeline wouldn't.

535
00:23:41,440 --> 00:23:42,440
Speaker 2: Add up, so weird.

536
00:23:42,520 --> 00:23:45,080
Speaker 3: I feel like I feel like the conspiracy has been

537
00:23:45,080 --> 00:23:46,600
Speaker 3: started by the people around him.

538
00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:49,960
Speaker 1: Well, I said, or is Bob just like playing into it?

539
00:23:50,040 --> 00:23:52,240
Speaker 1: I couldn't quite figure it out, like it just I

540
00:23:52,280 --> 00:23:55,119
Speaker 1: had so many questions about it, you know, and I

541
00:23:55,160 --> 00:23:58,760
Speaker 1: couldn't really fully ask them. The thing I said is

542
00:23:58,760 --> 00:24:01,040
Speaker 1: if he really wants to squad, goshit just let them

543
00:24:01,040 --> 00:24:03,600
Speaker 1: test his DNA. Why isn't that happening?

544
00:24:04,080 --> 00:24:04,240
Speaker 2: Right?

545
00:24:04,320 --> 00:24:07,119
Speaker 1: But then, I mean I went on a rabbit hole later,

546
00:24:07,280 --> 00:24:10,960
Speaker 1: like the day after, and there's this other guy that

547
00:24:11,040 --> 00:24:14,680
Speaker 1: has resurfaced at some point that I'm not convinced wasn't Bob,

548
00:24:15,359 --> 00:24:19,680
Speaker 1: And he had Presley DNA. And if you compare side

549
00:24:19,680 --> 00:24:21,639
Speaker 1: by sides with what Bob looks like with all of

550
00:24:21,680 --> 00:24:23,920
Speaker 1: us his dad, it's like identical.

551
00:24:24,400 --> 00:24:24,600
Speaker 2: Right.

552
00:24:25,040 --> 00:24:26,960
Speaker 1: So I don't have the answer. I just know there's

553
00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:29,560
Speaker 1: something weird going on. There, and I would love to

554
00:24:29,600 --> 00:24:31,480
Speaker 1: know if anybody has gone on a rabbit hole, because

555
00:24:31,480 --> 00:24:33,440
Speaker 1: I feel like I know so much about this situation

556
00:24:33,520 --> 00:24:34,920
Speaker 1: right now, I don't know if I'm doing it any

557
00:24:35,119 --> 00:24:37,120
Speaker 1: justice with the stories. There's just it's one of those

558
00:24:37,119 --> 00:24:39,560
Speaker 1: things where it's like all these facts come into your

559
00:24:39,600 --> 00:24:43,400
Speaker 1: brain randomly. You know, it's not always the best at

560
00:24:43,400 --> 00:24:47,159
Speaker 1: repeating them back. But yeah, and it sounds crazy. I

561
00:24:47,200 --> 00:24:51,600
Speaker 1: totally understand that it sounds crazy. I just fully I

562
00:24:51,600 --> 00:24:54,000
Speaker 1: don't think I trust like the government obviously, with all

563
00:24:54,040 --> 00:24:56,800
Speaker 1: this Jeffrey Epstein stuff, I'm like, well, he's probably alive too,

564
00:24:57,000 --> 00:24:59,280
Speaker 1: I don't I don't believe anything that's going on with

565
00:24:59,320 --> 00:25:02,760
Speaker 1: that case. Like now, am I a conspiracy theorist?

566
00:25:02,840 --> 00:25:02,919
Speaker 3: Like?

567
00:25:02,960 --> 00:25:05,960
Speaker 1: Have I a commis person? I don't know. But with

568
00:25:06,119 --> 00:25:07,879
Speaker 1: the Elvis story, so I think I'm just kind of like,

569
00:25:07,920 --> 00:25:10,800
Speaker 1: I don't trust anything the government says right now. So

570
00:25:10,960 --> 00:25:14,800
Speaker 1: maybe this was some sort of plot to get Elvis

571
00:25:14,840 --> 00:25:18,560
Speaker 1: out of the situation he was in and they put

572
00:25:18,640 --> 00:25:22,440
Speaker 1: him in witness protection and now he's just teaching people

573
00:25:22,480 --> 00:25:23,119
Speaker 1: about God.

574
00:25:24,119 --> 00:25:26,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, crazier things have happened.

575
00:25:26,840 --> 00:25:30,320
Speaker 1: Crazier things have happened. So I don't know. I just

576
00:25:30,359 --> 00:25:33,120
Speaker 1: hope that they get this documentary out asap. They told

577
00:25:33,160 --> 00:25:35,439
Speaker 1: me it's going to be a while though, but they

578
00:25:35,480 --> 00:25:37,520
Speaker 1: get this out and we get some answers.

579
00:25:37,960 --> 00:25:38,880
Speaker 2: I wonder if.

580
00:25:40,320 --> 00:25:46,800
Speaker 3: If it's like possible, mathematically possible for two people to

581
00:25:47,000 --> 00:25:50,760
Speaker 3: have really similar DNA but not.

582
00:25:51,040 --> 00:25:52,680
Speaker 1: Be from the same person.

583
00:25:53,440 --> 00:25:55,159
Speaker 2: Oh, because it's like it must be.

584
00:25:55,200 --> 00:25:56,879
Speaker 3: I mean, I don't know much about DNA, but I

585
00:25:56,920 --> 00:25:58,920
Speaker 3: feel like there must be some sort of mathm like,

586
00:25:59,359 --> 00:26:03,800
Speaker 3: however you DNA, there has to be some mathematics in that,

587
00:26:03,920 --> 00:26:06,840
Speaker 3: you know, like, well, okay, completely obviously it would be

588
00:26:06,920 --> 00:26:10,320
Speaker 3: completely random, you know, but like there has to be

589
00:26:10,400 --> 00:26:12,359
Speaker 3: two people with the same fingerprints in the world, Like

590
00:26:12,400 --> 00:26:13,720
Speaker 3: how many patterns are there?

591
00:26:13,960 --> 00:26:17,520
Speaker 1: I don't know. They say there's not, though, but with DNA,

592
00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:19,960
Speaker 1: I will say, so, I went so deep on this

593
00:26:20,040 --> 00:26:23,440
Speaker 1: rabbit hole that I found there has been someone has

594
00:26:23,520 --> 00:26:26,400
Speaker 1: come out I think it was in two thousand and

595
00:26:26,400 --> 00:26:31,240
Speaker 1: one and said that they were Elvis, but they went

596
00:26:31,280 --> 00:26:35,240
Speaker 1: by this name Jesse, which is Elvis's twin brother who died,

597
00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:38,520
Speaker 1: and then they ended up finding like some sort of

598
00:26:38,600 --> 00:26:41,240
Speaker 1: DNA of that. Guys, there's a lot of things with

599
00:26:41,280 --> 00:26:43,640
Speaker 1: Elvis too. Oh, I'm sorry I'm jumping ahead, but they've

600
00:26:43,720 --> 00:26:45,919
Speaker 1: got DNA of that guy's and he was connected to

601
00:26:45,960 --> 00:26:49,520
Speaker 1: the Presley family in some capacity. But the guy that

602
00:26:49,720 --> 00:26:51,960
Speaker 1: was the like doctor that was reporting in on this

603
00:26:52,080 --> 00:26:55,840
Speaker 1: DNA said, if we don't have this certain type of DNA,

604
00:26:55,920 --> 00:26:58,560
Speaker 1: there are a lot of similar variations and so like

605
00:26:58,640 --> 00:27:00,919
Speaker 1: it could just be reading that way, like similar to

606
00:27:00,960 --> 00:27:04,960
Speaker 1: what you're saying. Yeah, in that finding, they were trying

607
00:27:05,000 --> 00:27:08,520
Speaker 1: to pull from this old doctor some DNA samples that

608
00:27:08,560 --> 00:27:13,200
Speaker 1: he had of Elvis's and apparently from that doctor, Elvis's

609
00:27:13,480 --> 00:27:17,399
Speaker 1: autopsy DNA and Elvis's liver DNA from when he was

610
00:27:17,880 --> 00:27:22,159
Speaker 1: younger did not match, which made me think that his

611
00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:23,920
Speaker 1: autopsy DNA was not real.

612
00:27:24,760 --> 00:27:25,280
Speaker 2: Huh.

613
00:27:25,600 --> 00:27:27,560
Speaker 1: I don't know, guys, I need help on this one.

614
00:27:27,640 --> 00:27:29,960
Speaker 1: So if you have any thoughts on.

615
00:27:29,840 --> 00:27:36,159
Speaker 3: That, Yeah, like them what the science was like even

616
00:27:36,359 --> 00:27:38,879
Speaker 3: at the point of his death, that could just be

617
00:27:39,040 --> 00:27:42,400
Speaker 3: like it's caught up, so you know, we we can

618
00:27:42,480 --> 00:27:45,719
Speaker 3: read so much more now scientifically.

619
00:27:45,240 --> 00:27:47,919
Speaker 1: Well, right, And that's the hard part is the last

620
00:27:48,240 --> 00:27:51,439
Speaker 1: findings of anything Elvis. I mean, he apparently died when

621
00:27:51,480 --> 00:27:53,880
Speaker 1: he was forty two, so that was a long time ago.

622
00:27:54,680 --> 00:28:00,919
Speaker 3: How how precisely you added it because A Lord, I

623
00:28:01,040 --> 00:28:01,679
Speaker 3: don't know.

624
00:28:01,560 --> 00:28:04,840
Speaker 1: What to believe anymore. I truly don't. And it's so

625
00:28:05,040 --> 00:28:09,080
Speaker 1: weird that this is such a heavy conspiracy. Like I

626
00:28:09,080 --> 00:28:11,720
Speaker 1: if it was like one article that I had found,

627
00:28:12,560 --> 00:28:14,480
Speaker 1: I don't think I would put any weight to this.

628
00:28:14,640 --> 00:28:17,720
Speaker 1: But it's so widely talked about. I'm just like, why

629
00:28:17,800 --> 00:28:19,200
Speaker 1: is it getting so much traction?

630
00:28:19,480 --> 00:28:21,760
Speaker 3: And how did we never hear of it until you

631
00:28:21,840 --> 00:28:23,159
Speaker 3: had to work on with Elvis?

632
00:28:24,920 --> 00:28:28,119
Speaker 1: Think you say that now? I don't know, but I

633
00:28:28,240 --> 00:28:30,560
Speaker 1: it's weird because the more I've told this story, That's

634
00:28:30,560 --> 00:28:33,240
Speaker 1: why I'm feeling like somebody listening must have known about

635
00:28:33,240 --> 00:28:36,080
Speaker 1: this already, because apparently it's been all over TikTok. You

636
00:28:36,119 --> 00:28:38,640
Speaker 1: and I are just not on TikTok really right, right? So?

637
00:28:38,840 --> 00:28:41,000
Speaker 1: I think you know, I had a friend he was like, oh,

638
00:28:41,040 --> 00:28:44,760
Speaker 1: I've heard of this, so it's not not common to

639
00:28:44,840 --> 00:28:47,000
Speaker 1: know about this. And I just happened to get to

640
00:28:47,000 --> 00:28:50,959
Speaker 1: work with Bob, so I experienced Elvis firsthand.

641
00:28:51,760 --> 00:28:52,280
Speaker 2: There you go.

642
00:28:52,400 --> 00:28:56,880
Speaker 1: I gotta say he had some swag. No he was not,

643
00:28:57,440 --> 00:28:59,480
Speaker 1: but there was that thing of like he was a

644
00:28:59,520 --> 00:29:03,240
Speaker 1: little bit it kind of nri is that the right word?

645
00:29:03,360 --> 00:29:06,400
Speaker 1: Like he had that about him, but then on the

646
00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:10,520
Speaker 1: flip side, could be very charming too, So it was like,

647
00:29:10,560 --> 00:29:13,120
Speaker 1: once he warmed up, he was very charming in the

648
00:29:13,280 --> 00:29:16,600
Speaker 1: same way that like a superstar typically is. So that

649
00:29:16,760 --> 00:29:18,440
Speaker 1: was the other thing that threw me. I was just like,

650
00:29:18,520 --> 00:29:21,480
Speaker 1: oh my god, he is very much like the very

651
00:29:21,480 --> 00:29:24,720
Speaker 1: big stars that I've been around. Yes, and he's a pastor,

652
00:29:24,880 --> 00:29:26,440
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. That's where it starts to

653
00:29:26,440 --> 00:29:28,600
Speaker 1: throw you, as you're like, that's not really the world

654
00:29:29,320 --> 00:29:33,000
Speaker 1: he had. He definitely has that like star quality about him.

655
00:29:33,120 --> 00:29:36,040
Speaker 2: So I'm going to go listen after this. I need

656
00:29:36,080 --> 00:29:36,800
Speaker 2: to listen to those.

657
00:29:36,760 --> 00:29:50,440
Speaker 1: Listen to vocals. Oh yeah, yeah, report back while you

658
00:29:50,480 --> 00:29:53,800
Speaker 1: were gone. I had Hopewdard on. She coined the term

659
00:29:53,920 --> 00:29:56,200
Speaker 1: boy sober on TikTok a couple of years ago and

660
00:29:56,200 --> 00:29:59,120
Speaker 1: it's kind of gone into this viral movement and now

661
00:29:59,320 --> 00:30:02,800
Speaker 1: she is the host of her own podcast called boy Sober,

662
00:30:02,840 --> 00:30:06,080
Speaker 1: which is also when iHeart like ours is, And she

663
00:30:06,160 --> 00:30:08,200
Speaker 1: came on and it actually turned out to be this

664
00:30:08,320 --> 00:30:11,160
Speaker 1: really just fun conversation for me. It was just kind

665
00:30:11,160 --> 00:30:13,959
Speaker 1: of like girl talk. What I really appreciate about her

666
00:30:14,040 --> 00:30:16,000
Speaker 1: is she's just very honest, you know, like I think

667
00:30:16,040 --> 00:30:19,200
Speaker 1: a lot of people lead with this kind of expert

668
00:30:19,240 --> 00:30:22,200
Speaker 1: mentality or I've got it figured out, and she doesn't.

669
00:30:22,280 --> 00:30:26,000
Speaker 1: You know, she's talking about what boy sober is and

670
00:30:26,440 --> 00:30:31,160
Speaker 1: this journey that she's still continuing on. Basically, she coined

671
00:30:31,160 --> 00:30:34,520
Speaker 1: the term boys sober after going through some pretty like

672
00:30:34,840 --> 00:30:39,040
Speaker 1: toxic dynamics repeatedly in dating, and she was like, I

673
00:30:39,120 --> 00:30:41,720
Speaker 1: just got to take a break, and her sister said

674
00:30:41,720 --> 00:30:44,920
Speaker 1: something like, yeah, boys sober is better than any kind

675
00:30:44,920 --> 00:30:46,920
Speaker 1: of sober or something like that, and so they just

676
00:30:47,440 --> 00:30:50,840
Speaker 1: use that as this movement kind of to take a

677
00:30:50,880 --> 00:30:56,680
Speaker 1: break to really reevaluate how you're dating and decentralized, she says,

678
00:30:56,720 --> 00:30:59,440
Speaker 1: decentralized men in your life. So it's not just this

679
00:30:59,520 --> 00:31:03,560
Speaker 1: thing where I think so commonly you get just obsessed

680
00:31:03,600 --> 00:31:07,720
Speaker 1: about dating. You get obsessed with the unavailable guy. You know,

681
00:31:07,760 --> 00:31:10,120
Speaker 1: like we've all been there where you're just doing your

682
00:31:10,440 --> 00:31:13,440
Speaker 1: participating in these situationships or things that are just not

683
00:31:13,560 --> 00:31:16,080
Speaker 1: good for you, but you're obsessed with it and you're

684
00:31:16,120 --> 00:31:19,239
Speaker 1: finding yourself like stalking the guy who keeps watching your

685
00:31:19,240 --> 00:31:21,760
Speaker 1: Instagram stories or something. You know, like that's the that's

686
00:31:21,760 --> 00:31:22,880
Speaker 1: the thing that she taught, Oh.

687
00:31:22,720 --> 00:31:25,240
Speaker 2: You're looking for you're looking for meaning that isn't there.

688
00:31:25,680 --> 00:31:27,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, and so she was just like, I just need

689
00:31:27,480 --> 00:31:30,800
Speaker 1: to reevaluate how I'm dating because also she had this

690
00:31:30,880 --> 00:31:33,680
Speaker 1: other guy who was available to her, who she had

691
00:31:33,800 --> 00:31:36,479
Speaker 1: kind of been back and forth with for years. Sounds

692
00:31:36,480 --> 00:31:38,840
Speaker 1: like he was very like interested in having a relationship

693
00:31:38,840 --> 00:31:40,880
Speaker 1: with her, and she could not show up for him

694
00:31:41,040 --> 00:31:44,200
Speaker 1: or in that relationship. So she's only wanting the unavailable,

695
00:31:44,400 --> 00:31:46,640
Speaker 1: you know. And I just so resonated with that, Like

696
00:31:46,680 --> 00:31:49,280
Speaker 1: that was dynamics that I've been through in the past.

697
00:31:49,400 --> 00:31:53,160
Speaker 1: And we've talked about how you know, you take breaks

698
00:31:53,160 --> 00:31:56,480
Speaker 1: from alcohol sometimes or something I've done. I know we've

699
00:31:56,520 --> 00:31:59,040
Speaker 1: talked about it on this podcast. It's something Hope's done

700
00:31:59,240 --> 00:32:01,880
Speaker 1: because you want to just make sure you're drinking if

701
00:32:01,880 --> 00:32:04,520
Speaker 1: you're going to drink in a way that's conscious, like

702
00:32:05,000 --> 00:32:07,720
Speaker 1: that you're aware of how you're using it, she said,

703
00:32:07,880 --> 00:32:11,040
Speaker 1: choosing not using, which I really appreciated, Like I love that.

704
00:32:11,600 --> 00:32:12,960
Speaker 1: And so anyway, that's what she wanted to do with

705
00:32:13,000 --> 00:32:15,600
Speaker 1: boy Sober, and I thought it was really an interesting concept.

706
00:32:15,760 --> 00:32:18,080
Speaker 1: She was super honest about her journey with that, and

707
00:32:18,120 --> 00:32:20,200
Speaker 1: I thought to myself, I wonder what Chip would think

708
00:32:20,200 --> 00:32:23,120
Speaker 1: about this because I feel like any of the game

709
00:32:23,120 --> 00:32:26,440
Speaker 1: men that I know have never mentioned anything like this,

710
00:32:26,480 --> 00:32:28,880
Speaker 1: And I was like, is this is this like a

711
00:32:28,920 --> 00:32:32,120
Speaker 1: hetero woman thing? Like are we the ones doing this?

712
00:32:32,280 --> 00:32:35,600
Speaker 1: Or is this across the board? Is it something that

713
00:32:35,640 --> 00:32:37,000
Speaker 1: you resonate with that all?

714
00:32:37,240 --> 00:32:39,680
Speaker 2: Well, I mean, yeah, I'd never heard the term.

715
00:32:39,720 --> 00:32:42,080
Speaker 3: In fact, when when Kelly told me what we were

716
00:32:42,080 --> 00:32:44,640
Speaker 3: going to be talking about, I thought she said voiceover

717
00:32:44,920 --> 00:32:46,640
Speaker 3: and I was like, wow, I thought that term been

718
00:32:46,680 --> 00:32:47,560
Speaker 3: around for a long.

719
00:32:47,400 --> 00:32:50,160
Speaker 1: Time, but you're like, nothing groundbreaking.

720
00:32:50,320 --> 00:32:52,960
Speaker 3: So I read about There was an article about her

721
00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:56,240
Speaker 3: in the New York Times that I read, and what

722
00:32:56,320 --> 00:32:58,160
Speaker 3: I think is also interesting that she pointed out in

723
00:32:58,200 --> 00:33:00,120
Speaker 3: that article that I'd like to I don't know, I

724
00:33:00,160 --> 00:33:02,000
Speaker 3: haven't listened to the podcast, so I don't know if

725
00:33:02,000 --> 00:33:04,760
Speaker 3: she you all touched on this. But part of the

726
00:33:04,840 --> 00:33:07,520
Speaker 3: reason why she chose to do it was that she

727
00:33:07,720 --> 00:33:12,440
Speaker 3: also recognized where she was at fault, well yeah, in

728
00:33:13,080 --> 00:33:16,560
Speaker 3: some in you know, and repeating patterns or being the

729
00:33:16,600 --> 00:33:18,920
Speaker 3: one who was like not really into it but dragging

730
00:33:18,920 --> 00:33:21,560
Speaker 3: it along or whatever. And so it wasn't just like

731
00:33:22,480 --> 00:33:24,880
Speaker 3: I'm shunning men because men suck.

732
00:33:25,080 --> 00:33:27,160
Speaker 2: It was more about, like, wait, a minute, Like.

733
00:33:27,600 --> 00:33:30,280
Speaker 3: I've been in relationships my whole life and I'm still

734
00:33:30,280 --> 00:33:32,360
Speaker 3: not getting it right. Maybe I need to step back

735
00:33:32,360 --> 00:33:34,240
Speaker 3: and figure out who I am and what I want

736
00:33:34,280 --> 00:33:38,920
Speaker 3: and what I want out of relationships. So yeah, I

737
00:33:38,920 --> 00:33:41,160
Speaker 3: mean it certainly resonates with me. I said to you

738
00:33:41,200 --> 00:33:43,920
Speaker 3: before we started recording, I was like, honestly, I think

739
00:33:43,920 --> 00:33:46,840
Speaker 3: I could take a month of boys sobriety, like you know,

740
00:33:47,200 --> 00:33:49,680
Speaker 3: coming back from a trip, Like I'm always a lot

741
00:33:49,720 --> 00:33:53,120
Speaker 3: more active on apps when I'm in new places because

742
00:33:53,160 --> 00:33:56,040
Speaker 3: it is it's like window shopping and it's all new products.

743
00:33:57,920 --> 00:34:02,200
Speaker 3: So I'm acutely aware of how much time I've wasted

744
00:34:02,680 --> 00:34:05,400
Speaker 3: on apps in the last week and a half. And

745
00:34:05,440 --> 00:34:08,560
Speaker 3: then it's like it is it is an addiction thing,

746
00:34:08,680 --> 00:34:11,120
Speaker 3: like you are getting dopamine from those hits, and then

747
00:34:11,160 --> 00:34:14,520
Speaker 3: when you get home, it's hard to break that addiction again.

748
00:34:14,719 --> 00:34:17,120
Speaker 3: So I think I might just delete all the apps

749
00:34:17,120 --> 00:34:18,920
Speaker 3: from my phone for a month and see and just

750
00:34:19,000 --> 00:34:22,359
Speaker 3: try that. Yeah, Because the truth is, it's like it

751
00:34:22,400 --> 00:34:25,000
Speaker 3: is a zero return, and so far it's a zero

752
00:34:25,120 --> 00:34:28,360
Speaker 3: return investment for me, you know, Like, yes, I've I

753
00:34:28,400 --> 00:34:30,320
Speaker 3: have met some people on apps, and I've had short

754
00:34:30,400 --> 00:34:32,399
Speaker 3: relationships or long relationships with.

755
00:34:32,360 --> 00:34:33,120
Speaker 2: Them or whatever.

756
00:34:33,680 --> 00:34:37,160
Speaker 3: But the amount of time that I'm investing in people

757
00:34:37,320 --> 00:34:41,799
Speaker 3: that really has nothing to offer me or do not

758
00:34:42,000 --> 00:34:43,920
Speaker 3: align with what I really want.

759
00:34:43,960 --> 00:34:46,520
Speaker 2: But what I want is a response.

760
00:34:46,719 --> 00:34:50,040
Speaker 3: From you know, in that moment, all I really want

761
00:34:50,080 --> 00:34:53,440
Speaker 3: is a response, and then then the dopamine starts or

762
00:34:53,560 --> 00:34:56,399
Speaker 3: validation or whatever it is. But that's not what I'm

763
00:34:56,600 --> 00:34:59,040
Speaker 3: ultimately looking for. I'm looking to fall in love and

764
00:34:59,080 --> 00:35:01,879
Speaker 3: have a partner in life and find that best friend

765
00:35:01,880 --> 00:35:03,160
Speaker 3: that I want to do everything with.

766
00:35:03,800 --> 00:35:06,080
Speaker 2: And if I'm observing.

767
00:35:05,520 --> 00:35:08,720
Speaker 3: What i'm the way that I'm acting and going about

768
00:35:08,760 --> 00:35:13,120
Speaker 3: that like all I'm doing is wasting my time and

769
00:35:13,239 --> 00:35:15,719
Speaker 3: when I could just be focusing on making myself the

770
00:35:15,760 --> 00:35:20,000
Speaker 3: best version of me and focusing on all of the

771
00:35:20,000 --> 00:35:23,839
Speaker 3: things that I love. Because then I feel like, at

772
00:35:23,880 --> 00:35:28,440
Speaker 3: least I'm putting myself in the environments where I'm going

773
00:35:28,480 --> 00:35:30,960
Speaker 3: to meet someone that is interested in spending the time

774
00:35:31,000 --> 00:35:31,279
Speaker 3: with me.

775
00:35:31,719 --> 00:35:33,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, and that's a line, right, Yeah.

776
00:35:33,880 --> 00:35:37,400
Speaker 3: And of course, look like all of us have physical

777
00:35:37,480 --> 00:35:40,000
Speaker 3: needs too, and I think some of these apps are

778
00:35:40,040 --> 00:35:41,800
Speaker 3: good for that because if you need to get laid

779
00:35:41,840 --> 00:35:44,000
Speaker 3: sometimes it is just like a really quick exchange and

780
00:35:44,040 --> 00:35:47,080
Speaker 3: that's all that is. But I also think too, like

781
00:35:47,840 --> 00:35:50,920
Speaker 3: if I step back and observe that sort of pattern,

782
00:35:51,800 --> 00:35:55,439
Speaker 3: that's not healthy either because it's you're not really yeah,

783
00:35:55,480 --> 00:35:58,879
Speaker 3: you might be satisfying an itch it's transactional. That it's

784
00:35:58,920 --> 00:36:03,160
Speaker 3: transactional then, but it also I think it fuels that

785
00:36:03,239 --> 00:36:07,160
Speaker 3: sort of addiction too, because it's about it's about you know,

786
00:36:07,320 --> 00:36:09,640
Speaker 3: it's like a drug, like if you're addicted to heroin,

787
00:36:09,840 --> 00:36:13,200
Speaker 3: Like you'll do whatever it takes to get that heroin.

788
00:36:14,160 --> 00:36:18,879
Speaker 3: And then it's not like you're better off afterwards, you know, like, yeah,

789
00:36:18,920 --> 00:36:21,839
Speaker 3: you've satisfied the itch for a while, but you really

790
00:36:21,920 --> 00:36:23,680
Speaker 3: haven't fixed the problem. No.

791
00:36:24,560 --> 00:36:26,759
Speaker 1: I think that's always the interesting point, right, Like I

792
00:36:26,800 --> 00:36:28,719
Speaker 1: told we talked about this a little bit on the podcast,

793
00:36:28,719 --> 00:36:33,200
Speaker 1: but I said, the word sober is associated obviously with addiction, right,

794
00:36:33,280 --> 00:36:35,920
Speaker 1: And that might sound extreme to some people to go

795
00:36:36,080 --> 00:36:39,479
Speaker 1: boy sober, But I think the point of any sort

796
00:36:39,520 --> 00:36:43,399
Speaker 1: of sober curiosity that we're starting to talk about in

797
00:36:43,560 --> 00:36:47,440
Speaker 1: our culture is to actually be paying attention to how

798
00:36:47,440 --> 00:36:50,840
Speaker 1: you're moving and choosing and not just using, you know,

799
00:36:50,880 --> 00:36:53,759
Speaker 1: because we really aren't set up to do that yet

800
00:36:53,840 --> 00:36:56,160
Speaker 1: or we haven't been. Like, I think it's becoming more

801
00:36:56,160 --> 00:36:58,800
Speaker 1: common to talk about. But if you really trace back,

802
00:36:59,040 --> 00:37:02,040
Speaker 1: like for women, if you trace back to childhood, start

803
00:37:02,080 --> 00:37:05,120
Speaker 1: thinking about like Disney movies. I mean, we're truly programmed

804
00:37:05,160 --> 00:37:07,680
Speaker 1: from day one that the most important thing for your

805
00:37:07,760 --> 00:37:11,200
Speaker 1: life is to find your prints. And so if that

806
00:37:11,400 --> 00:37:16,200
Speaker 1: is your only mark of success or what happiness would

807
00:37:16,239 --> 00:37:19,359
Speaker 1: look like in your programming, you're gonna be to have

808
00:37:19,400 --> 00:37:22,040
Speaker 1: this like that sense of urgency about it, you know

809
00:37:22,080 --> 00:37:24,440
Speaker 1: what I mean. And so that becomes the thing that

810
00:37:24,480 --> 00:37:27,960
Speaker 1: you're also chasing. And it's just like, if you're not evaluating,

811
00:37:28,000 --> 00:37:29,520
Speaker 1: like what you were saying about hope, if you're not

812
00:37:29,560 --> 00:37:34,520
Speaker 1: evaluating your movements, are you even doing it because you

813
00:37:34,600 --> 00:37:36,240
Speaker 1: want to be doing it? Are you doing it because

814
00:37:36,280 --> 00:37:39,280
Speaker 1: of the shoulds, because of the pressure? Are you showing

815
00:37:39,360 --> 00:37:42,720
Speaker 1: up to actually date an available person? Are you chasing

816
00:37:42,760 --> 00:37:45,600
Speaker 1: that guy who's never gonna show up for you in

817
00:37:45,640 --> 00:37:48,239
Speaker 1: the way that you probably want in your life? And

818
00:37:48,600 --> 00:37:50,719
Speaker 1: to your point about the sex, she mentioned that too,

819
00:37:50,719 --> 00:37:52,960
Speaker 1: because she was just like, you know, we can all

820
00:37:53,040 --> 00:37:54,520
Speaker 1: do that too, And she's like, I think there was

821
00:37:54,560 --> 00:37:58,080
Speaker 1: this big movement amongst women where it's like to take

822
00:37:58,200 --> 00:38:02,200
Speaker 1: back your sexual and empowerment. You just sleep around a bunch,

823
00:38:02,280 --> 00:38:05,520
Speaker 1: and it's like, that's not actually that empowering. It's really not.

824
00:38:05,920 --> 00:38:09,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's not, like but it is it.

825
00:38:10,800 --> 00:38:14,600
Speaker 3: I feel like because of the programming, we're not even

826
00:38:14,680 --> 00:38:17,160
Speaker 3: sure what we want, you know.

827
00:38:17,120 --> 00:38:18,360
Speaker 1: Like because the points.

828
00:38:18,640 --> 00:38:20,799
Speaker 2: Yeah, even like.

829
00:38:21,640 --> 00:38:25,000
Speaker 3: Even for a straight dude, like there is the programming

830
00:38:25,040 --> 00:38:27,000
Speaker 3: of like you got to go out and get laid tonight,

831
00:38:27,120 --> 00:38:30,200
Speaker 3: or you're not like as macho as the next.

832
00:38:29,920 --> 00:38:33,000
Speaker 2: Guy, so which feeds into the whole thing.

833
00:38:33,239 --> 00:38:37,880
Speaker 3: Like then who's an easy target some girl who is

834
00:38:37,960 --> 00:38:42,520
Speaker 3: desperate for just attention, you know, And but then she

835
00:38:42,840 --> 00:38:45,120
Speaker 3: if if she's on the hunt too, just to check

836
00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:48,520
Speaker 3: that box, like then they feel like they've succeeded at something,

837
00:38:48,600 --> 00:38:53,040
Speaker 3: but in reality, they're just making it harder for them

838
00:38:53,040 --> 00:38:56,759
Speaker 3: to know what they really want because they have the

839
00:38:56,840 --> 00:39:01,239
Speaker 3: satisfaction of achieving a goal in the moment versus like

840
00:39:01,320 --> 00:39:04,120
Speaker 3: the real goal of like wanting to connect with another

841
00:39:04,200 --> 00:39:08,720
Speaker 3: human being. And you know, I can, without any judgment,

842
00:39:08,760 --> 00:39:12,600
Speaker 3: sit Aaron, understand why we're in this position, both males

843
00:39:12,600 --> 00:39:13,320
Speaker 3: and females.

844
00:39:13,360 --> 00:39:15,480
Speaker 1: You know, well, I think we all can relate to it,

845
00:39:15,520 --> 00:39:18,480
Speaker 1: Like we've all been there in our lives, and I

846
00:39:18,520 --> 00:39:21,279
Speaker 1: don't have any judgment of whether you fully want to

847
00:39:21,320 --> 00:39:22,759
Speaker 1: be in a relationship or you just want to go

848
00:39:22,800 --> 00:39:24,560
Speaker 1: out and have fun and go on some dates or

849
00:39:24,719 --> 00:39:26,799
Speaker 1: just hook up or whatever it is that like you

850
00:39:26,960 --> 00:39:29,360
Speaker 1: truly want, that's on you. That's not my place to

851
00:39:29,400 --> 00:39:32,239
Speaker 1: say anything about what anyone should be doing with their

852
00:39:32,280 --> 00:39:34,680
Speaker 1: life or their relationships or their dating. I don't believe

853
00:39:34,719 --> 00:39:37,239
Speaker 1: that it's one size fits all. I really don't. But

854
00:39:37,640 --> 00:39:40,719
Speaker 1: I think the point being do you even know what

855
00:39:40,760 --> 00:39:43,360
Speaker 1: you want? Like you're saying, like, are we just going

856
00:39:43,400 --> 00:39:47,520
Speaker 1: through the motions of life or are we making conscious decisions?

857
00:39:47,600 --> 00:39:50,759
Speaker 1: And like if you say you really want a relationship,

858
00:39:50,840 --> 00:39:53,480
Speaker 1: are you dating that way? Like my boyfriend has this

859
00:39:53,600 --> 00:39:56,680
Speaker 1: friend and we keep getting so frustrated with him because

860
00:39:56,840 --> 00:39:59,520
Speaker 1: he keeps saying I want to get married and have kids.

861
00:40:00,080 --> 00:40:02,239
Speaker 1: I think that he just says that because of the

862
00:40:02,280 --> 00:40:03,680
Speaker 1: way he grew up and he feels like that's what

863
00:40:03,760 --> 00:40:06,480
Speaker 1: he should do, because the way that this mandates is

864
00:40:06,520 --> 00:40:09,359
Speaker 1: not for that, you know what I mean. He has

865
00:40:09,480 --> 00:40:14,279
Speaker 1: available women who would make great partners or mothers or

866
00:40:14,320 --> 00:40:16,520
Speaker 1: things like that that he will not even pay attention to,

867
00:40:16,640 --> 00:40:20,640
Speaker 1: and he always chases after the emotionally unavailable woman or

868
00:40:20,640 --> 00:40:23,040
Speaker 1: the woman who cheats on him that he gets obsessed with,

869
00:40:23,160 --> 00:40:26,120
Speaker 1: like it's that dynamic. So I don't think he's actually

870
00:40:26,200 --> 00:40:29,799
Speaker 1: really available himself. And I keep saying that, but I

871
00:40:29,880 --> 00:40:33,640
Speaker 1: only know that because of my own patterns, you know. Yeah,

872
00:40:33,760 --> 00:40:37,879
Speaker 1: I think we're so often operating from the shoulds or

873
00:40:38,080 --> 00:40:40,680
Speaker 1: the panic of oh, this is what I've been taught

874
00:40:40,719 --> 00:40:43,440
Speaker 1: my whole life will make me happy or successful or

875
00:40:43,840 --> 00:40:46,960
Speaker 1: look good on paper or anything like that, And it's

876
00:40:47,000 --> 00:40:50,319
Speaker 1: not truly at all this conscious decision. And so that's

877
00:40:50,360 --> 00:40:53,600
Speaker 1: what Hope's whole point is is to take the pause,

878
00:40:53,800 --> 00:40:57,040
Speaker 1: take the break, go boy sober or girl sober or

879
00:40:57,040 --> 00:40:59,640
Speaker 1: whatever it is, and ask yourself, like, what do I want?

880
00:41:00,120 --> 00:41:03,360
Speaker 1: Right am I Am I dating the right people for

881
00:41:03,520 --> 00:41:05,960
Speaker 1: the things that I want? Like just questions like that,

882
00:41:06,200 --> 00:41:06,440
Speaker 1: you know.

883
00:41:07,080 --> 00:41:10,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I think it's it's not black and white,

884
00:41:10,960 --> 00:41:13,000
Speaker 3: you know, Like, and I fully agree with you, like

885
00:41:13,040 --> 00:41:14,279
Speaker 3: if you want to go have fun, go have fun.

886
00:41:14,280 --> 00:41:15,480
Speaker 3: If you want to be in a relationship, be in

887
00:41:15,480 --> 00:41:19,440
Speaker 3: a relationship. But I think some people just see it

888
00:41:19,560 --> 00:41:21,920
Speaker 3: both of those things at surface level, like I just

889
00:41:21,920 --> 00:41:25,880
Speaker 3: want a relationship or I wanted to have fun, And

890
00:41:26,239 --> 00:41:29,000
Speaker 3: it's so much deeper than that, Like you have to

891
00:41:29,040 --> 00:41:32,680
Speaker 3: define what kind of relationship you want and what that

892
00:41:32,719 --> 00:41:34,400
Speaker 3: needs to look like for you to be happy in

893
00:41:34,400 --> 00:41:38,160
Speaker 3: a relationship, because ending up in a shitty relationship is

894
00:41:38,200 --> 00:41:41,160
Speaker 3: really easy to do too, you know, like you've been there.

895
00:41:41,640 --> 00:41:41,839
Speaker 2: Yeah.

896
00:41:41,840 --> 00:41:44,520
Speaker 3: So I think a lot of people because the idea,

897
00:41:44,640 --> 00:41:47,319
Speaker 3: all the deepest they've thought about it is I want

898
00:41:47,360 --> 00:41:49,480
Speaker 3: to I want a relationship, I want to get married,

899
00:41:49,560 --> 00:41:51,600
Speaker 3: I want to find someone to spend my life with,

900
00:41:52,280 --> 00:41:55,360
Speaker 3: and not like they haven't really envisioned what that person

901
00:41:55,480 --> 00:41:57,560
Speaker 3: is and what those qualities are and what they how

902
00:41:57,560 --> 00:42:00,520
Speaker 3: they want that relationship, how that relationship will work for them.

903
00:42:01,280 --> 00:42:04,400
Speaker 3: And so the pattern there is you go through a

904
00:42:04,400 --> 00:42:06,880
Speaker 3: breakup and you don't observe what happened, and you just

905
00:42:06,920 --> 00:42:08,880
Speaker 3: go into another relationship.

906
00:42:08,360 --> 00:42:11,319
Speaker 1: Absolutely you know, yes, and then you keep going on

907
00:42:11,360 --> 00:42:13,239
Speaker 1: the same thing. You find yourself in the same kind

908
00:42:13,280 --> 00:42:15,960
Speaker 1: of relationship. Yeah, and it's just repeating the cycle.

909
00:42:16,320 --> 00:42:18,960
Speaker 2: It's a really interesting concept. I brought this up with you.

910
00:42:19,920 --> 00:42:23,240
Speaker 3: I wonder if there is a term like voy sober

911
00:42:24,160 --> 00:42:27,000
Speaker 3: or obviously it needs a term, but like, is there

912
00:42:27,560 --> 00:42:31,959
Speaker 3: an exercise, okay that people who are in healthy relationships

913
00:42:32,680 --> 00:42:36,839
Speaker 3: could do to sort of make sure that their relationships

914
00:42:36,840 --> 00:42:40,080
Speaker 3: stay healthy, because I think you know, like sometimes what

915
00:42:40,160 --> 00:42:42,640
Speaker 3: happens in relationships is that you get in a relationship

916
00:42:42,640 --> 00:42:47,000
Speaker 3: and it's good, but you lose yourself within the relationship

917
00:42:47,320 --> 00:42:49,680
Speaker 3: and you lose things outside of the relationship because you're

918
00:42:49,719 --> 00:42:54,080
Speaker 3: so focused on just that, Like could you do like

919
00:42:54,160 --> 00:42:56,440
Speaker 3: would it makes sense if you're in a really healthy,

920
00:42:56,480 --> 00:42:59,440
Speaker 3: strong relationship to look at your partner and be like, hey,

921
00:42:59,520 --> 00:43:02,120
Speaker 3: let's just like I'm not going to sleep with anybody,

922
00:43:02,200 --> 00:43:04,279
Speaker 3: Like this isn't about us breaking up. This is about

923
00:43:04,320 --> 00:43:06,799
Speaker 3: me going and spending a month, two weeks whatever it

924
00:43:06,840 --> 00:43:10,280
Speaker 3: needs to be with me so that I can reconnect

925
00:43:10,280 --> 00:43:13,439
Speaker 3: with myself and so that I miss you and all

926
00:43:13,480 --> 00:43:14,360
Speaker 3: of the things.

927
00:43:14,640 --> 00:43:18,359
Speaker 2: And then if you come back just like rejuvenated, Like

928
00:43:18,719 --> 00:43:21,320
Speaker 2: does that exist? Does anyone do that? I'm just so curious.

929
00:43:21,520 --> 00:43:24,080
Speaker 1: What's interesting is do you remember two weeks ago I

930
00:43:24,160 --> 00:43:26,840
Speaker 1: told you I had Kelly Coin on and we talked

931
00:43:26,840 --> 00:43:29,800
Speaker 1: about the different variations within relationships that she was writing

932
00:43:29,800 --> 00:43:33,000
Speaker 1: about in New York Times and Washington Post. One of

933
00:43:33,040 --> 00:43:36,480
Speaker 1: them was couples who lived separately in separate houses, and

934
00:43:36,920 --> 00:43:40,960
Speaker 1: where most of those situations began was with a conversation

935
00:43:41,120 --> 00:43:45,160
Speaker 1: like that of, Hey, I've supported your dream for X

936
00:43:45,200 --> 00:43:47,600
Speaker 1: amount of years, I'm so grateful for where you've gotten.

937
00:43:47,640 --> 00:43:50,560
Speaker 1: Like there was a one couple specifically that she mentioned

938
00:43:50,920 --> 00:43:54,120
Speaker 1: that the woman had helped the man really build up

939
00:43:54,120 --> 00:43:56,160
Speaker 1: his career and get it to this place that he

940
00:43:56,239 --> 00:43:58,560
Speaker 1: wanted it to be, and at the end of that

941
00:43:58,719 --> 00:44:01,360
Speaker 1: she was left realizing, but I didn't focus anything on

942
00:44:01,480 --> 00:44:04,520
Speaker 1: my dreams in my job and my career. And so

943
00:44:04,640 --> 00:44:06,640
Speaker 1: that was when they decided to live in separate houses.

944
00:44:06,680 --> 00:44:09,600
Speaker 1: And it wasn't from a contentious place at all. In fact,

945
00:44:09,920 --> 00:44:12,200
Speaker 1: it brought them closer together. And now they live together

946
00:44:12,239 --> 00:44:15,240
Speaker 1: again and they're so much closer. But in that time,

947
00:44:15,320 --> 00:44:18,439
Speaker 1: she built her own business and really got in touch

948
00:44:18,480 --> 00:44:21,279
Speaker 1: with her passions again. And so when she came back

949
00:44:21,320 --> 00:44:23,400
Speaker 1: to the relationship, like you said, there was no like

950
00:44:23,440 --> 00:44:26,040
Speaker 1: they weren't outside of the relationship. It wasn't like they

951
00:44:26,080 --> 00:44:29,279
Speaker 1: were dating other people or even not talking to each other,

952
00:44:29,719 --> 00:44:32,439
Speaker 1: but they just lived separately because she could not. She said,

953
00:44:32,520 --> 00:44:34,600
Speaker 1: I could not be in the same house and put

954
00:44:34,640 --> 00:44:37,319
Speaker 1: as much focus on myself, which I think is very

955
00:44:37,360 --> 00:44:41,520
Speaker 1: common with the woman in the relationship like that that role.

956
00:44:42,040 --> 00:44:43,839
Speaker 1: But I think, like to your point, I think that

957
00:44:43,880 --> 00:44:48,360
Speaker 1: can be easy for anyone to fall into the relationship

958
00:44:48,640 --> 00:44:51,480
Speaker 1: becoming the universe. I used to have a mentor that

959
00:44:51,480 --> 00:44:54,640
Speaker 1: would say to me, it's a relationship, not the universe,

960
00:44:54,880 --> 00:44:57,719
Speaker 1: because I would just revolve around the relationship that I

961
00:44:57,760 --> 00:45:01,120
Speaker 1: was in at the time, to the neglect of my

962
00:45:01,239 --> 00:45:04,160
Speaker 1: own self, my own life, my own job, my own friends,

963
00:45:04,280 --> 00:45:08,120
Speaker 1: you know, and so now in my life because I

964
00:45:08,160 --> 00:45:11,839
Speaker 1: crashed and burned so hard on those levels and it

965
00:45:11,920 --> 00:45:15,280
Speaker 1: took me to my knees literally to like the bottom

966
00:45:15,320 --> 00:45:17,440
Speaker 1: of the barrel. I got to the place where I

967
00:45:17,440 --> 00:45:19,879
Speaker 1: was like, yo, I built a life that I love.

968
00:45:20,120 --> 00:45:22,440
Speaker 1: If you can contribute to that, great And that's the

969
00:45:22,520 --> 00:45:25,239
Speaker 1: kind of relationship that I'm in now, is that we

970
00:45:25,320 --> 00:45:28,880
Speaker 1: both contribute to each other's lives in a good way,

971
00:45:29,280 --> 00:45:32,279
Speaker 1: but also we have lives that we love ourselves. And

972
00:45:32,320 --> 00:45:34,640
Speaker 1: it's it's just changed the game for me to be

973
00:45:34,680 --> 00:45:35,799
Speaker 1: in a relationship like that.

974
00:45:36,239 --> 00:45:39,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean the distance makes sure's unique too. Yeah,

975
00:45:40,080 --> 00:45:42,200
Speaker 3: because you don't like you're you're sort of forced to

976
00:45:42,200 --> 00:45:43,279
Speaker 3: take a break yea.

977
00:45:44,400 --> 00:45:46,239
Speaker 2: Yeah, and which is which is kind of nice.

978
00:45:46,280 --> 00:45:48,399
Speaker 3: I mean, I guess it sort of plays into that,

979
00:45:48,520 --> 00:45:51,200
Speaker 3: you know, living in other apartments and stuff.

980
00:45:50,880 --> 00:45:52,960
Speaker 1: Like, Yeah, I mean, because we definitely miss each other

981
00:45:53,360 --> 00:45:54,720
Speaker 1: and we get.

982
00:45:54,600 --> 00:45:56,239
Speaker 2: To you have to like make the most of the

983
00:45:56,280 --> 00:45:57,520
Speaker 2: time that you're good.

984
00:45:58,040 --> 00:46:01,200
Speaker 3: It wouldn't benefit anyone if you all or just together

985
00:46:01,360 --> 00:46:03,839
Speaker 3: and then fighting the whole time because things are good,

986
00:46:03,880 --> 00:46:06,360
Speaker 3: you know. It's like, but obviously it's you have to

987
00:46:06,440 --> 00:46:07,680
Speaker 3: use the time to communicate.

988
00:46:08,000 --> 00:46:10,040
Speaker 1: We have to communicate more than I've ever had to

989
00:46:10,080 --> 00:46:13,600
Speaker 1: communicate relationship because we're apart, you know. So it's, yeah,

990
00:46:13,640 --> 00:46:16,680
Speaker 1: it's a different dynamic, but yeah, you're right, like you

991
00:46:16,719 --> 00:46:19,839
Speaker 1: maximize your time together, and you also have to learn

992
00:46:19,920 --> 00:46:22,239
Speaker 1: to ebb and flow with each other's lives as you're

993
00:46:22,239 --> 00:46:25,560
Speaker 1: like moving in and out of them and then go

994
00:46:25,719 --> 00:46:28,520
Speaker 1: back or you know, really maximize the time you have

995
00:46:28,600 --> 00:46:31,200
Speaker 1: to yourself. And like I really work hard when he's

996
00:46:31,239 --> 00:46:34,000
Speaker 1: not here, I'm not there, you know, like or really

997
00:46:34,040 --> 00:46:35,880
Speaker 1: try to see all my friends. So it is a

998
00:46:35,880 --> 00:46:38,439
Speaker 1: different dynamic, but it's for me, it's one I'm really

999
00:46:38,520 --> 00:46:42,000
Speaker 1: enjoying right now. It helps me balance that voice soberness

1000
00:46:42,120 --> 00:46:45,600
Speaker 1: or whatever a little bit more so. Anyway, I just

1001
00:46:45,640 --> 00:46:47,520
Speaker 1: think it's a really interesting concept, and I think I'm

1002
00:46:47,560 --> 00:46:51,200
Speaker 1: always a big fan of reflecting, you know, like taking

1003
00:46:51,239 --> 00:46:56,040
Speaker 1: the moment, reflecting on what you're doing, like your movements,

1004
00:46:56,040 --> 00:46:58,440
Speaker 1: how are you moving are you are you moving in

1005
00:46:58,440 --> 00:47:00,839
Speaker 1: a way that's in the line with what you actually want,

1006
00:47:00,840 --> 00:47:03,640
Speaker 1: what you actually value, within your integrity and all those things.

1007
00:47:03,719 --> 00:47:06,560
Speaker 1: Are you moving unconsciously? Because we all do that too,

1008
00:47:06,719 --> 00:47:09,040
Speaker 1: and our culture really sets us up for that to

1009
00:47:09,120 --> 00:47:12,160
Speaker 1: be really easy to just throw another thing at it,

1010
00:47:12,200 --> 00:47:15,799
Speaker 1: throw another man in the mix, throw another date on

1011
00:47:15,880 --> 00:47:18,399
Speaker 1: the plot, you know, like go out and hook up,

1012
00:47:18,520 --> 00:47:21,480
Speaker 1: like you were saying, like, it's just like we're set

1013
00:47:21,600 --> 00:47:25,239
Speaker 1: up to keep the dopamine hits flowing if we want to,

1014
00:47:26,000 --> 00:47:28,080
Speaker 1: but sometimes it's not going to fully give us what

1015
00:47:28,120 --> 00:47:30,600
Speaker 1: we actually really want that will be satisfying.

1016
00:47:31,120 --> 00:47:32,879
Speaker 3: I mean, I think ultimately we have to think about

1017
00:47:32,880 --> 00:47:36,799
Speaker 3: our long term goals. You know, like dating is is

1018
00:47:37,040 --> 00:47:40,439
Speaker 3: no different than building a career that you're obsessed with

1019
00:47:40,520 --> 00:47:42,880
Speaker 3: or whatever it is. You know, it's if you have

1020
00:47:42,920 --> 00:47:45,959
Speaker 3: a creative project that you're working on, it's you don't

1021
00:47:46,000 --> 00:47:49,080
Speaker 3: want to be most excited about it on the first day.

1022
00:47:49,400 --> 00:47:52,560
Speaker 3: You need to be something that's sustainable and you have

1023
00:47:52,600 --> 00:47:55,680
Speaker 3: to know what you're like, what those benchmarks are going

1024
00:47:55,760 --> 00:47:58,400
Speaker 3: to be, so that you recognize, like you're still in

1025
00:47:58,440 --> 00:48:00,360
Speaker 3: it for the right reasons or whatever that you know.

1026
00:48:00,360 --> 00:48:02,359
Speaker 3: I don't know if I'm articulating that properly, but.

1027
00:48:02,400 --> 00:48:03,399
Speaker 1: I think I know what you're saying.

1028
00:48:03,480 --> 00:48:06,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, And I know from my past experience that

1029
00:48:07,080 --> 00:48:09,160
Speaker 3: I get really caught up in just the idea. I

1030
00:48:09,200 --> 00:48:11,239
Speaker 3: get excited when I meet someone in their feels like

1031
00:48:11,239 --> 00:48:12,600
Speaker 3: there's some connection.

1032
00:48:12,400 --> 00:48:19,160
Speaker 2: That's that yeah and dreamy right, yeah, so I don't but.

1033
00:48:19,160 --> 00:48:22,399
Speaker 1: You want to make sure it's not delusional in dreaming, right, yeah, right,

1034
00:48:22,520 --> 00:48:24,560
Speaker 1: and you're not just getting wrapped up in the fantasy.

1035
00:48:24,760 --> 00:48:26,320
Speaker 1: You and I both have this Piscy's man, and I

1036
00:48:26,360 --> 00:48:28,360
Speaker 1: think it is easy to get wrapped up in the

1037
00:48:28,400 --> 00:48:31,560
Speaker 1: fantasy idea of someone versus the actual reality of who

1038
00:48:31,560 --> 00:48:32,000
Speaker 1: they are.

1039
00:48:32,160 --> 00:48:35,920
Speaker 3: Oh, trust me, Like it's still fresh for me. Yeah, yeah,

1040
00:48:36,040 --> 00:48:38,839
Speaker 3: not super fresh, but somewhat I know what you mean. Yeah,

1041
00:48:38,840 --> 00:48:42,879
Speaker 3: My last you know, sort of dating experience was that so.

1042
00:48:44,200 --> 00:48:46,799
Speaker 2: Live and learn, you know, live and learn. But I do.

1043
00:48:46,840 --> 00:48:49,400
Speaker 2: I love this concept, you know, like a pause.

1044
00:48:49,520 --> 00:48:51,200
Speaker 1: We talk about that a lot on the podcast, but

1045
00:48:51,239 --> 00:48:53,640
Speaker 1: I think the pause is where that's the most important

1046
00:48:53,680 --> 00:48:55,839
Speaker 1: thing just in life in general.

1047
00:48:55,640 --> 00:48:56,480
Speaker 2: Like life in general.

1048
00:48:56,640 --> 00:49:01,239
Speaker 3: Yeah, this is just like it's such a personal and

1049
00:49:02,080 --> 00:49:04,680
Speaker 3: you know you have to like have your own back

1050
00:49:04,719 --> 00:49:07,880
Speaker 3: in these situations and know with confidence why you're gonna

1051
00:49:07,920 --> 00:49:10,640
Speaker 3: take that pause, because it's often the first thing that

1052
00:49:10,680 --> 00:49:12,879
Speaker 3: anyone asks people that they haven't seen it while are

1053
00:49:12,880 --> 00:49:13,760
Speaker 3: you dating anybody?

1054
00:49:13,840 --> 00:49:15,360
Speaker 2: Like it's the only in your life.

1055
00:49:15,400 --> 00:49:18,600
Speaker 1: It's so annoying that, Yeah, that's a case in point

1056
00:49:18,640 --> 00:49:21,239
Speaker 1: of are we doing it for the pressure of those

1057
00:49:21,280 --> 00:49:23,799
Speaker 1: situations or Like, it's what we were talking about last

1058
00:49:23,800 --> 00:49:26,440
Speaker 1: week when I was saying, if my boyfriend and I

1059
00:49:26,520 --> 00:49:28,520
Speaker 1: moved to the same city right now, it would only

1060
00:49:28,600 --> 00:49:31,759
Speaker 1: be to satisfy everyone else asking us those questions. It

1061
00:49:31,760 --> 00:49:34,560
Speaker 1: wouldn't be because that's what's best for us. And so

1062
00:49:34,640 --> 00:49:36,840
Speaker 1: it's the same concept. It's just like, who are you

1063
00:49:36,920 --> 00:49:39,319
Speaker 1: doing things for? Is it really what you want? And

1064
00:49:39,320 --> 00:49:42,080
Speaker 1: it's about defining your life in the way that you

1065
00:49:42,239 --> 00:49:44,839
Speaker 1: really want you that's true for you, right, But we're

1066
00:49:44,880 --> 00:49:46,879
Speaker 1: just not really taught to do that from day one,

1067
00:49:47,000 --> 00:49:49,239
Speaker 1: And so I think it's really cool that these conversations

1068
00:49:49,239 --> 00:49:52,360
Speaker 1: are coming out now and we can start asking ourselves

1069
00:49:52,400 --> 00:49:53,680
Speaker 1: those things and moving that way.

1070
00:49:54,160 --> 00:49:54,680
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1071
00:49:54,760 --> 00:49:57,279
Speaker 1: Yeah, anyway, if you guys have thoughts on this boy

1072
00:49:57,360 --> 00:49:59,560
Speaker 1: sober concept, if it's something you've done in your life

1073
00:49:59,800 --> 00:50:03,160
Speaker 1: or you're totally against it, whatever it is, or if

1074
00:50:03,160 --> 00:50:06,279
Speaker 1: you think you know about Elvis, please let me know.

1075
00:50:07,760 --> 00:50:09,440
Speaker 1: Please let me know. You can email us at the

1076
00:50:09,600 --> 00:50:11,480
Speaker 1: Edge at velves edge dot com. You can also hit

1077
00:50:11,480 --> 00:50:13,480
Speaker 1: me up on Instagram. I'm at Velvet's Edge.

1078
00:50:13,360 --> 00:50:16,440
Speaker 2: Chip, I'm at Chip Doors. It's h I P D

1079
00:50:16,560 --> 00:50:18,120
Speaker 2: O R s ch.

1080
00:50:18,520 --> 00:50:22,360
Speaker 1: Oh you really gave them there. You can also follow

1081
00:50:22,400 --> 00:50:25,239
Speaker 1: our new page at Velvet's Edge podcast that will be

1082
00:50:25,280 --> 00:50:27,680
Speaker 1: coming soon. We're working on some things I'm really excited about.

1083
00:50:28,239 --> 00:50:32,480
Speaker 1: And you can also watch this on YouTube. You're visual now,

1084
00:50:32,520 --> 00:50:37,120
Speaker 1: you're so we really are? All right anyway. I hope

1085
00:50:37,160 --> 00:50:39,080
Speaker 1: you guys have a great weekend. And as you guys

1086
00:50:39,160 --> 00:50:41,080
Speaker 1: move into your weekend and you're living on the edge,

1087
00:50:41,120 --> 00:50:42,400
Speaker 1: I hope you always remember.

1088
00:50:42,120 --> 00:50:45,160
Speaker 2: Too at casual. Bye.