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Speaker 1: City Misconnections. That was me staring.

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Speaker 2: There's only two places to find true love in this world.

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Speaker 2: One is at the barber shop when a freshly cut

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Speaker 2: strand of hair floats over from their chair and lands

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Speaker 2: directly in your mouthlakes, I talk about locks of love.

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Speaker 2: And the other is on the pages of craigslist dot org.

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Speaker 2: We scour that website every week to find the best

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Speaker 2: misconnections that they have to offer, like this first one

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Speaker 2: titled you Gave Me Butterflies The tummy kind man for

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Speaker 2: woman thirties.

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Speaker 1: Man saying tummy is just a hard pass for me.

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Speaker 2: This is from the Insect Convention. I'm just gonna read

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Speaker 2: this how I think it sounds okay?

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Speaker 3: Violence hovering over the mesmerizing display of rare beetles. And

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Speaker 3: that's when you crawled in parentheses. Actually you are walking,

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Speaker 3: but you know, since we're on an insect convention, I

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Speaker 3: saw crawling sounds cooler.

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Speaker 1: You were so beautiful.

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Speaker 3: Your outfit reminded me of a voluptuous Japanese silk moth. Oh.

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Speaker 1: I think that's good.

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Speaker 3: Upon a second glance, maybe you were dressed as the

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Speaker 3: super villain from the two thousand and nine film Infestation.

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Speaker 1: Oh. And I wasn't sure. Yeah, he's the one person

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Speaker 1: that saw that.

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Speaker 3: There were a lot of costumes there that day. Though

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Speaker 3: you might not know who I was. I was the

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Speaker 3: guy dressed in the praying mantith body more skin tight

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Speaker 3: suit holding up a sign that said insect pride.

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Speaker 2: You know it never ends well for a male praying mantis, right, Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: At one point I walked by and gave you a note.

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Speaker 3: I'm not sure if you threw it away or accidentally

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Speaker 3: lost it, but in case you didn't read it, it

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Speaker 3: said I wouldn't mind spending ten to twenty eight days

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Speaker 3: molting inside of a cocoon with you. That was the

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Speaker 3: most romantic thing I could think of. I wish I

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Speaker 3: would have asked you out, but I am far too shy.

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Speaker 3: Now I feel like a little boy in a field

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Speaker 3: holding a jar of firefly, just yearning for the warm

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Speaker 3: luminescence of your presence. Yeah, you want to get together

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Speaker 3: sometime and touch the antennas? Oh?

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Speaker 1: I think that's might be up for it. That signed Garfin.

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Speaker 2: Oh, it's a winner's name. Let's go to your next misconnection.

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Speaker 2: This one's titled clean up on I Love O Man

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Speaker 2: for Woman fifty four grocery store. Okay, you were the cute,

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Speaker 2: punk looking girl stalking up on Activia.

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Speaker 1: You've got a healthy, healthy guts, you know.

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Speaker 2: I don't know why you were filling up your cart

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Speaker 2: with arms full of yogurt. Maybe you're dealing with a

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Speaker 2: blockage and then.

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Speaker 1: A thumbs up emoji. I am sounds hot. I was

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Speaker 1: the bald guy cruising by you in one of.

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Speaker 2: Those grocery store scooters parentheses f y I.

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Speaker 1: I don't have a problem walking or anything.

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Speaker 2: I just like it, okay, because why not get your

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Speaker 2: groceries in style.

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Speaker 1: I saw an old lady run out of a battery yesterday.

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Speaker 1: She was in a motorized car in the grocery store

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Speaker 1: and they had to bring in a new one to

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Speaker 1: move her over. Yeah, we're pointing and laughing at her.

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Speaker 1: Just was not anyways.

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Speaker 2: You might remember when I pulled up and asked if

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Speaker 2: you could get me that jar of bread and butter pickles.

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Speaker 2: As I watched, you reached for it on the top shelf.

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Speaker 2: That's when I caught a whiff of your scent. It

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Speaker 2: smelled familiar. Do you use Summer's Eve Clinical Strength deodorant?

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Speaker 1: What?

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Speaker 2: I believe you do because my mom uses the same

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Speaker 2: exact stuff. I had no idea they were in the

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Speaker 2: Deodora game and a great choice by the word, I

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Speaker 2: suddenly became nervous, so I clumsily asked about all the

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Speaker 2: yogurt by pointing to your stash and muttering.

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Speaker 1: The words you hungry.

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Speaker 3: Urt.

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Speaker 2: You replied, Oh, I'm not buying these yogurts to eat.

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Speaker 2: Then you smirked and walked away. For that statement, both

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Speaker 2: confused and aroused me.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, she needs to be here in this No,

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Speaker 1: I want to get out of here.

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Speaker 2: I've lost sleep thinking about what you're doing with all

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Speaker 2: that girt?

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Speaker 1: What could she do? Please tell me that's signed Pepper

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Speaker 1: Yoga bathtop face mask.

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Speaker 2: This next misconnection is titled sorry I made your friend

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Speaker 2: cry man for a woman. Thirty five Uptown bar on

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Speaker 2: third you were the pint size brunette with a tiny

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Speaker 2: squirrel like teeth.

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Speaker 1: I think only two of them. I think the restaurant.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, he says, I saw you from across the

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Speaker 2: bar nibbling on a pretzel that you held in both hands.

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Speaker 3: Squirrel, She save half of it in your left cheek.

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Speaker 2: For some reason, I really wanted to get to know

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Speaker 2: you and see if you were a nature lover like me.

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Speaker 1: So I made my move. I'm imagining her.

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Speaker 2: Unfortunately, I didn't notice your wingwoman until I approached. So

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Speaker 2: I quickly came up with a clever distraction plan and

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Speaker 2: asked your friend if she wanted to dance. I think

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Speaker 2: she was confused because there was no music on or

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Speaker 2: dance floor nearby, but I said, I said, perfect, you

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Speaker 2: can go dance by yourself in the restroom.

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Speaker 1: Well, I get to know your cute friend whoa Now.

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Speaker 2: Personally, I thought that approach was pretty oh for having

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Speaker 2: less than two seconds to think about it. Oh, apparently

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Speaker 2: your friend wasn't amused. I'm crying for she had the

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Speaker 2: audacity to call me a bad name and make fun

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Speaker 2: of my skinny jeans, saying only skinny people should be

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Speaker 2: allowed to wear them.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god.

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Speaker 2: I retaliated by telling the bartender that her idea was

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Speaker 2: fake and she should be thrown out. Things got a

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Speaker 2: little ugly after that, but I take almost fifty percent responsibility.

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Speaker 1: So how about.

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Speaker 2: This come back Saturday, and this time don't bring the

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Speaker 2: trash in with you. Wow, this doesn't signed Barry, oh

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Speaker 2: Verry sucks.

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Speaker 1: That is your Craigslist misconnections for the week. Your photap

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Speaker 1: is coming up. Frooking Jeffrey in the morning,