1 00:00:00,720 --> 00:00:04,000 Speaker 1: Hi. This is Laura Vandercam. I'm a mother of four, 2 00:00:04,360 --> 00:00:08,640 Speaker 1: an author, journalist, and speaker. And this is Sarah hart Hunger. 3 00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:10,920 Speaker 1: I'm a mother of two and soon to be three, 4 00:00:11,200 --> 00:00:14,159 Speaker 1: and a practicing physician. We are two working parents who 5 00:00:14,240 --> 00:00:17,479 Speaker 1: love our careers and our families. Welcome to best of 6 00:00:17,560 --> 00:00:22,040 Speaker 1: both worlds. Here we talk about how real women manage work, family, 7 00:00:22,200 --> 00:00:25,760 Speaker 1: and time for fun, from figuring out childcare to mapping 8 00:00:25,760 --> 00:00:28,560 Speaker 1: out long term career goals. We want you to get 9 00:00:28,560 --> 00:00:34,680 Speaker 1: the most out of life. Welcome to best of both worlds. 10 00:00:34,760 --> 00:00:37,400 Speaker 1: This is Laura. Today we're going to be talking about 11 00:00:37,479 --> 00:00:41,839 Speaker 1: how we handle tech in our lives. But first, one 12 00:00:41,840 --> 00:00:44,400 Speaker 1: of the ways we handle tech are not handle tech 13 00:00:44,479 --> 00:00:46,080 Speaker 1: as it were, is how we read. I read a 14 00:00:46,120 --> 00:00:49,400 Speaker 1: lot of stuff on my kindle, app on my phone. Sarah, 15 00:00:49,400 --> 00:00:51,920 Speaker 1: you don't read that way, do you. I have in 16 00:00:51,960 --> 00:00:54,560 Speaker 1: the past, but I just have moved away from it 17 00:00:54,600 --> 00:00:56,640 Speaker 1: in the last year or two because I somehow just 18 00:00:56,680 --> 00:00:59,520 Speaker 1: don't find it as satisfying. So I'm mostly on paper 19 00:00:59,520 --> 00:01:01,760 Speaker 1: these days. And so you carry around like your book 20 00:01:01,800 --> 00:01:06,479 Speaker 1: with you. I don't because I don't really have unexpected 21 00:01:06,560 --> 00:01:08,880 Speaker 1: downtime to read all that often. I mean I'm at work, 22 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:11,319 Speaker 1: I don't have time to read at work or I'm driving, 23 00:01:11,360 --> 00:01:13,880 Speaker 1: which obviously that wouldn't work so well. I know people 24 00:01:13,880 --> 00:01:17,080 Speaker 1: are big into audiobooks, but I like podcasts, so that 25 00:01:17,120 --> 00:01:21,120 Speaker 1: doesn't and that's not my reading methodality. So normally my 26 00:01:21,200 --> 00:01:23,800 Speaker 1: reading time happens in bed, like at night, after I 27 00:01:23,840 --> 00:01:27,039 Speaker 1: go upstairs. It's not necessarily the spur of the moment, 28 00:01:27,520 --> 00:01:28,960 Speaker 1: the type of reading that I know you get to 29 00:01:29,000 --> 00:01:31,640 Speaker 1: do a lot of. So yeah, so I use paper 30 00:01:31,680 --> 00:01:33,280 Speaker 1: and it just kind of sits in the stack next 31 00:01:33,280 --> 00:01:35,880 Speaker 1: to my bed or gets brought downstairs, but I don't 32 00:01:35,880 --> 00:01:38,440 Speaker 1: have much toting around. How big is the stack on 33 00:01:38,480 --> 00:01:41,480 Speaker 1: your bedside? I actually I posted it like my tow 34 00:01:41,600 --> 00:01:43,520 Speaker 1: b red stack to Instagram like a month ago, and 35 00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:45,760 Speaker 1: I think I've read like two of them of the 36 00:01:45,920 --> 00:01:48,840 Speaker 1: stack so far, because I'm pretty slow. But I think 37 00:01:48,880 --> 00:01:50,880 Speaker 1: the stack has about six books in it right now. 38 00:01:51,480 --> 00:01:55,120 Speaker 1: And I just finished The Course of Love by Ellen 39 00:01:55,360 --> 00:02:00,320 Speaker 1: de Bouton. Okay, that was like bad French accent, but 40 00:02:00,440 --> 00:02:05,080 Speaker 1: he's a French philosopher but also kind of you know, 41 00:02:05,120 --> 00:02:08,160 Speaker 1: he does narrative type of fiction as well, and he 42 00:02:08,200 --> 00:02:10,840 Speaker 1: sort of weaves the two together. And this book. I 43 00:02:10,880 --> 00:02:12,400 Speaker 1: think you read it too, right, Yeah, what did you 44 00:02:12,440 --> 00:02:15,560 Speaker 1: think of it? Oh? I loved it. I mean he 45 00:02:15,639 --> 00:02:18,720 Speaker 1: goes it sort of goes through the history of a 46 00:02:18,760 --> 00:02:23,519 Speaker 1: couple from their meeting to kind of the messy middle, 47 00:02:23,600 --> 00:02:25,840 Speaker 1: with an emphasis on the middle because he talks about 48 00:02:25,840 --> 00:02:27,720 Speaker 1: how there are so many books that are focused on 49 00:02:27,720 --> 00:02:31,160 Speaker 1: that love story piece, but nobody likes to kind of 50 00:02:31,200 --> 00:02:34,120 Speaker 1: delve into what happens next, when really that's like much 51 00:02:34,160 --> 00:02:37,200 Speaker 1: more of our lives than that you know, dreamy like 52 00:02:37,600 --> 00:02:40,240 Speaker 1: state that you have in the very beginning. So he 53 00:02:40,280 --> 00:02:43,200 Speaker 1: addresses it in that really unique way because he he's 54 00:02:43,240 --> 00:02:45,800 Speaker 1: following this couple's story, but then at the same time 55 00:02:45,840 --> 00:02:50,000 Speaker 1: he kind of pauses to do philosophical style commentary on it. 56 00:02:50,160 --> 00:02:52,680 Speaker 1: And I was just completely drawn in. And then I 57 00:02:52,720 --> 00:02:54,800 Speaker 1: told my husband he had to read it too. Yeah, 58 00:02:54,840 --> 00:02:56,840 Speaker 1: I thought it was he thinks of it. I mean 59 00:02:56,880 --> 00:03:00,520 Speaker 1: there's a great line in there of like watch it, 60 00:03:00,560 --> 00:03:03,280 Speaker 1: but it's just we choose what form of suffering to 61 00:03:03,360 --> 00:03:07,639 Speaker 1: sacrifice ourselves for, Like you all love is about choosing 62 00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:11,239 Speaker 1: your suffering basically, yeah, or like sort of choosing what 63 00:03:11,280 --> 00:03:14,480 Speaker 1: you can something about like choosing what you can handle it, 64 00:03:14,600 --> 00:03:16,680 Speaker 1: like what you can live with because you know, there's 65 00:03:16,680 --> 00:03:19,720 Speaker 1: going to be imperfections no matter what, but you have 66 00:03:19,760 --> 00:03:23,920 Speaker 1: to find the right ones for you, I guess. But anyway, 67 00:03:23,960 --> 00:03:27,320 Speaker 1: I highly recommend it to anyone who is in a relationship, 68 00:03:27,520 --> 00:03:30,720 Speaker 1: has ever been in a relationship, or interested in relationships. Yeah. 69 00:03:31,280 --> 00:03:33,400 Speaker 1: You know, it's funny because I wrote about reading that 70 00:03:33,440 --> 00:03:35,600 Speaker 1: book and somebody who had read it and not liked 71 00:03:35,600 --> 00:03:39,960 Speaker 1: it listed all its flaws for me, which there are many, Like, 72 00:03:40,280 --> 00:03:42,760 Speaker 1: let's say, you know, no book is perfect. It gets 73 00:03:42,760 --> 00:03:46,360 Speaker 1: a little bit long winded about his philosophical stuff at times. Yeah, 74 00:03:46,480 --> 00:03:49,280 Speaker 1: sometimes I found myself hoping that those for you know, 75 00:03:49,320 --> 00:03:51,320 Speaker 1: the being like, okay, I get back to the story, 76 00:03:51,760 --> 00:03:54,760 Speaker 1: and it's certainly not you know that couple's experience, thankfully 77 00:03:55,040 --> 00:03:59,080 Speaker 1: is not my experience. I mean not to not to 78 00:03:59,160 --> 00:04:02,240 Speaker 1: do spoilers. There's definitely ups and downs in their relationships, 79 00:04:02,240 --> 00:04:05,600 Speaker 1: and I'm grateful to have not experienced a certain particular 80 00:04:05,760 --> 00:04:10,800 Speaker 1: downside exactly couple does. But at the same time, I 81 00:04:10,920 --> 00:04:13,840 Speaker 1: just it was like, oh, this, this is it is 82 00:04:13,840 --> 00:04:15,880 Speaker 1: true that and what he pointed out that it just 83 00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:20,479 Speaker 1: was something that is not focused on nearly enough. Yeah. No, 84 00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:22,840 Speaker 1: I enjoyed the book too, just for that, you know, 85 00:04:22,880 --> 00:04:25,880 Speaker 1: what is happily ever after? There is no happily ever after, 86 00:04:26,240 --> 00:04:30,960 Speaker 1: And yeah, there can be very happy moments within a 87 00:04:31,040 --> 00:04:35,880 Speaker 1: long relationship, which is funny. I just you know, this 88 00:04:35,920 --> 00:04:37,800 Speaker 1: is not a political podcast. I'm not going to shay 89 00:04:37,800 --> 00:04:40,160 Speaker 1: anything about that. But I did just read Hillary Clinton's 90 00:04:40,200 --> 00:04:44,120 Speaker 1: What Happened, and there are similar aspects in that, and 91 00:04:44,120 --> 00:04:48,359 Speaker 1: that she does talk about her and oh wow, that 92 00:04:49,080 --> 00:04:50,800 Speaker 1: a little bit she doesn't go too much into. I 93 00:04:50,800 --> 00:04:52,280 Speaker 1: really wish she had gone more into it, because I 94 00:04:52,320 --> 00:04:54,400 Speaker 1: think it's fascinating from that perspective, Like the two of 95 00:04:54,440 --> 00:04:57,800 Speaker 1: them have been married for more than forty years in 96 00:04:57,880 --> 00:05:02,160 Speaker 1: the public eye the whole time, and obviously have gone 97 00:05:02,200 --> 00:05:05,560 Speaker 1: through some ups and downs, the downs being far more 98 00:05:05,880 --> 00:05:09,240 Speaker 1: public than I think any of us could ever imagine 99 00:05:09,400 --> 00:05:14,280 Speaker 1: going through, right, and yet they still seem to be 100 00:05:16,120 --> 00:05:19,840 Speaker 1: They're together for starters, they live together, they hang out together. 101 00:05:20,480 --> 00:05:23,239 Speaker 1: So there's a fascinating thing with that of like how 102 00:05:23,279 --> 00:05:25,920 Speaker 1: a marriage can go through some really rough patches and 103 00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:29,560 Speaker 1: yet still be strong forty years on that. You know, 104 00:05:29,560 --> 00:05:32,240 Speaker 1: I really wish the book had gone more into But yeah, 105 00:05:32,400 --> 00:05:36,120 Speaker 1: I think I've heard that Curtis Sidenfeld who wrote American Wife, 106 00:05:36,200 --> 00:05:40,520 Speaker 1: based on sort of a fictional life of Laura Bush, 107 00:05:40,680 --> 00:05:44,320 Speaker 1: is going to do a similar spin on Hillary and 108 00:05:44,320 --> 00:05:46,800 Speaker 1: Bill Clinton. So I am very much looking forward to that, 109 00:05:46,839 --> 00:05:49,200 Speaker 1: Like it's going to be fictional but sort of based 110 00:05:49,240 --> 00:05:52,160 Speaker 1: on what she would imagine that reality to be. Like, Yeah, 111 00:05:52,200 --> 00:05:56,320 Speaker 1: what else have you read lately? Well, I don't know. 112 00:05:57,200 --> 00:05:59,240 Speaker 1: Whenever I see Yearless, I almost like don't want to 113 00:05:59,279 --> 00:06:03,800 Speaker 1: admit what I read spot now. I'm definitely not always 114 00:06:03,839 --> 00:06:06,200 Speaker 1: reading these. And it's funny because I really, you know, 115 00:06:06,279 --> 00:06:08,039 Speaker 1: I think we mentioned like I used to we talked 116 00:06:08,040 --> 00:06:10,479 Speaker 1: about Mirakami on one of these episodes. I used to 117 00:06:10,520 --> 00:06:13,320 Speaker 1: love Habrooki Mirakami, and I still do, but a lot 118 00:06:13,360 --> 00:06:17,280 Speaker 1: of times I crave just sort of lighter, lighter options. 119 00:06:17,320 --> 00:06:19,919 Speaker 1: And I'm going to give a shout out to the three. 120 00:06:20,400 --> 00:06:23,200 Speaker 1: It has three novels in it so far, the Crazy 121 00:06:23,320 --> 00:06:29,680 Speaker 1: Rich Asian series by Kevin Kwan. Maybe not highbrow, incredibly entertaining. 122 00:06:29,880 --> 00:06:32,560 Speaker 1: So yeah, I devoured all three of those in the 123 00:06:32,640 --> 00:06:36,839 Speaker 1: last month or so. What made them so so readable 124 00:06:36,920 --> 00:06:40,720 Speaker 1: is that just uh hm, they're candy. I mean, it's 125 00:06:40,880 --> 00:06:44,839 Speaker 1: like the story about this like absurd dynasty type family 126 00:06:44,880 --> 00:06:48,599 Speaker 1: with billions of dollars in Asia, hence the title Crazy Versations. 127 00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:52,120 Speaker 1: And this American who sort of joins and upsets things 128 00:06:52,200 --> 00:06:54,600 Speaker 1: and I don't know. His writing is very engaging. There's 129 00:06:54,600 --> 00:06:58,479 Speaker 1: so many pop culture references, and it's fluffy without being 130 00:06:58,520 --> 00:07:01,120 Speaker 1: poorly written, which is like, you know that sometimes that's 131 00:07:01,160 --> 00:07:04,960 Speaker 1: a important Let's just like, if you want your fluff, 132 00:07:05,360 --> 00:07:08,479 Speaker 1: you don't want to like insult yourself while you're reading exactly. 133 00:07:08,520 --> 00:07:10,000 Speaker 1: You don't want to be like, you know, you don't 134 00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:12,000 Speaker 1: want to have that gut reaction to like, Okay, was 135 00:07:12,040 --> 00:07:14,520 Speaker 1: this even edited? No, clearly he edited it. He has 136 00:07:14,560 --> 00:07:17,520 Speaker 1: a nice voice, and I'm hoping for more volumes. So 137 00:07:17,680 --> 00:07:20,600 Speaker 1: come on, Kevin Kwan, what about you? What else have 138 00:07:20,640 --> 00:07:23,120 Speaker 1: you read? Well? I've read a couple of novels lately 139 00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:25,240 Speaker 1: that's sort of interesting. I read was Still Life by 140 00:07:25,320 --> 00:07:28,840 Speaker 1: Louise Penny, who's a mystery writer, and I hadn't really 141 00:07:29,040 --> 00:07:32,840 Speaker 1: read Who Done It in a long time. I mean 142 00:07:32,880 --> 00:07:36,120 Speaker 1: possibly since like the Nancy Drew Days. You know, it's 143 00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:38,600 Speaker 1: just not one of those genres that I really read 144 00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:40,600 Speaker 1: a lot of. But it was pretty well done. I'm 145 00:07:40,640 --> 00:07:42,320 Speaker 1: not sure I entirely buy the plot at the end. 146 00:07:42,320 --> 00:07:45,200 Speaker 1: But I had been saying on my Fall fun list, 147 00:07:45,240 --> 00:07:47,320 Speaker 1: I wanted to read a novel set and kind of 148 00:07:48,080 --> 00:07:52,800 Speaker 1: fall colors, fall, cool, crisp days, and you know, maybe 149 00:07:52,800 --> 00:07:54,680 Speaker 1: a little bit spooky. And somebody recommended this and I 150 00:07:55,080 --> 00:07:59,320 Speaker 1: fit the bill. It was set in autumnal Quebec and 151 00:08:00,400 --> 00:08:04,920 Speaker 1: about a murder mystery in this small town that of 152 00:08:04,920 --> 00:08:07,520 Speaker 1: course is incredibly picturesque and has a little bed and 153 00:08:07,520 --> 00:08:10,480 Speaker 1: breakfast and all that good stuff. So that was good. 154 00:08:11,200 --> 00:08:15,640 Speaker 1: But Sarah and I both read a nonfiction that we're 155 00:08:15,720 --> 00:08:19,720 Speaker 1: going to segue into our main section for Yes, because 156 00:08:19,720 --> 00:08:24,840 Speaker 1: this book definitely inspired the content of this episode a 157 00:08:24,840 --> 00:08:26,880 Speaker 1: little bit. So we're going to give a big shout 158 00:08:26,880 --> 00:08:30,320 Speaker 1: out to Manouche Sammarodi, who actually has a podcast which 159 00:08:30,360 --> 00:08:34,000 Speaker 1: is fantastic. It's called Note to Self. It airs on WNYC, 160 00:08:34,200 --> 00:08:36,760 Speaker 1: but also is available in podcast form. She did not 161 00:08:36,960 --> 00:08:40,080 Speaker 1: endorse this episode. We should have tried to ask on 162 00:08:40,200 --> 00:08:42,360 Speaker 1: or something. I don't know, maybe in the future that 163 00:08:42,400 --> 00:08:45,079 Speaker 1: would be amazing. But she recently came out with a 164 00:08:45,120 --> 00:08:49,960 Speaker 1: book called Bored and Brilliant, based on a project that 165 00:08:50,080 --> 00:08:52,800 Speaker 1: she launched to try to get people off of their 166 00:08:52,840 --> 00:08:58,079 Speaker 1: phones and back into real life thinking and maybe a 167 00:08:58,120 --> 00:09:02,120 Speaker 1: little bit of boredom. And I mean, the one thing 168 00:09:02,120 --> 00:09:03,880 Speaker 1: I will say is that as an avid listener to 169 00:09:03,920 --> 00:09:08,199 Speaker 1: her podcast, there wasn't that much new for me in 170 00:09:08,240 --> 00:09:11,720 Speaker 1: the book, because I mean, I would recognize chapters as episodes, 171 00:09:11,800 --> 00:09:13,839 Speaker 1: but that's fine. It was nice to have her kind 172 00:09:13,840 --> 00:09:16,120 Speaker 1: of putting them all together and then reading it all 173 00:09:16,160 --> 00:09:20,439 Speaker 1: together definitely made me think even more about about being 174 00:09:20,480 --> 00:09:23,640 Speaker 1: bored and about how we use our technology. So I 175 00:09:23,720 --> 00:09:27,200 Speaker 1: thought it was very interesting. This is a certain irony 176 00:09:27,240 --> 00:09:31,320 Speaker 1: of this, right because a podcast you listen to generally 177 00:09:31,440 --> 00:09:36,080 Speaker 1: on your phone, and in fact, I read Bored and 178 00:09:36,160 --> 00:09:41,640 Speaker 1: Brilliant on my kindle app on my phone, so all 179 00:09:41,679 --> 00:09:46,760 Speaker 1: these interactions with her are via my iPhone. Which she's 180 00:09:46,800 --> 00:09:49,440 Speaker 1: not saying that there's a problem with fins. I think 181 00:09:49,440 --> 00:09:53,000 Speaker 1: it's more the question of are you in control of 182 00:09:53,040 --> 00:09:56,240 Speaker 1: it or is it in control of you? And I 183 00:09:56,280 --> 00:09:59,800 Speaker 1: think and do we ever invite that blank space into 184 00:09:59,840 --> 00:10:03,560 Speaker 1: our lives because it is a little is very easy 185 00:10:03,600 --> 00:10:07,079 Speaker 1: these days to go straight from like magazine to podcasts 186 00:10:07,080 --> 00:10:09,560 Speaker 1: to TV show, to phone in your bed to sleeping, 187 00:10:09,600 --> 00:10:13,160 Speaker 1: where you literally don't have any time that you're just 188 00:10:13,240 --> 00:10:16,640 Speaker 1: kind of being quiet or thinking or just watching or 189 00:10:16,679 --> 00:10:20,360 Speaker 1: observing creating, like we're always consuming, and I think the 190 00:10:20,400 --> 00:10:22,880 Speaker 1: phone is a big part of that. But I agree 191 00:10:23,040 --> 00:10:26,480 Speaker 1: that that it's certainly not an all or nothing thing. 192 00:10:26,520 --> 00:10:29,040 Speaker 1: And I think that Manush would approve of our phone 193 00:10:29,120 --> 00:10:33,080 Speaker 1: use to do all of those things. To her podcast 194 00:10:33,120 --> 00:10:36,880 Speaker 1: and read her book, I hope, yes, yes, yes, absolutely 195 00:10:37,120 --> 00:10:40,880 Speaker 1: absolutely well we sin. Sarah posted something got her blog 196 00:10:41,040 --> 00:10:44,200 Speaker 1: a few days ago about reading this book and sort 197 00:10:44,240 --> 00:10:46,840 Speaker 1: of your interactions with tech and what you like and 198 00:10:46,840 --> 00:10:49,560 Speaker 1: what you don't and so there's some surprising there. So 199 00:10:49,640 --> 00:10:53,800 Speaker 1: you are not big into texting? Well, actually, so I 200 00:10:53,840 --> 00:10:56,000 Speaker 1: have to be really careful there. I wrote like a rant, 201 00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:57,480 Speaker 1: and I, you know, I do a lot of my 202 00:10:57,520 --> 00:10:59,520 Speaker 1: blog posts like five in the morning. I just get 203 00:10:59,520 --> 00:11:02,040 Speaker 1: some idea, yeah, and it just kind of comes out 204 00:11:02,080 --> 00:11:05,040 Speaker 1: like there's no premeditation there. And I rarely schedule a 205 00:11:05,080 --> 00:11:08,079 Speaker 1: post ahead of time. So I had just gotten the 206 00:11:08,160 --> 00:11:12,720 Speaker 1: day before, like a slew of these texts that were 207 00:11:14,559 --> 00:11:18,080 Speaker 1: kind of like urgent but not important, actually not even urgent, 208 00:11:18,200 --> 00:11:21,160 Speaker 1: like they were coming at me from various sources, like 209 00:11:21,240 --> 00:11:23,880 Speaker 1: one was from you know, I do not give my 210 00:11:23,920 --> 00:11:25,840 Speaker 1: cell phone number out to patients, and we are not 211 00:11:25,920 --> 00:11:29,040 Speaker 1: to be texting patients, like there's actually laws against that. 212 00:11:29,240 --> 00:11:31,680 Speaker 1: But if someone happens to be my patient and had 213 00:11:31,679 --> 00:11:34,480 Speaker 1: my number from something else, they may initiate a text 214 00:11:34,480 --> 00:11:37,720 Speaker 1: conversation with me saying, hey, I need this or that, 215 00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:40,800 Speaker 1: And I find it very intrusive because usually it's something 216 00:11:40,800 --> 00:11:42,520 Speaker 1: that is not urgent at all, like oh, I need 217 00:11:42,600 --> 00:11:45,240 Speaker 1: lab orders for an importment appointment in two weeks, but 218 00:11:45,320 --> 00:11:47,000 Speaker 1: yet it comes to me in this sort of like 219 00:11:47,640 --> 00:11:49,840 Speaker 1: to me a text or at least feels like are 220 00:11:49,880 --> 00:11:52,959 Speaker 1: felt like very like stop what you're doing right now 221 00:11:52,960 --> 00:11:55,240 Speaker 1: and address me kind of thing. I also have friends 222 00:11:55,480 --> 00:11:59,960 Speaker 1: who I love dearly, who I'm not talking about like 223 00:12:00,000 --> 00:12:01,319 Speaker 1: your friend that you don't stay in touch with it 224 00:12:01,400 --> 00:12:03,480 Speaker 1: once in a while will initiate a text conversation like 225 00:12:03,520 --> 00:12:06,160 Speaker 1: every couple of weeks. I'm talking about friends that like 226 00:12:07,360 --> 00:12:11,400 Speaker 1: tend to clearly they're on their phone a lot of 227 00:12:11,400 --> 00:12:13,840 Speaker 1: the time and like, we'll give you kind of commentary 228 00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:18,720 Speaker 1: like all day perhaps, and it's hard not to engage. 229 00:12:18,760 --> 00:12:20,960 Speaker 1: But the same time, I don't have the bandwidth for that, 230 00:12:21,080 --> 00:12:22,599 Speaker 1: especially when I'm at work or with when I'm with 231 00:12:22,840 --> 00:12:27,400 Speaker 1: my kids. And you know, when I wrote this blog post, 232 00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:30,880 Speaker 1: it kind of didn't occur to me that I could 233 00:12:30,920 --> 00:12:35,200 Speaker 1: just not could just not answer like that. It was 234 00:12:35,320 --> 00:12:39,040 Speaker 1: my treatment of these inputs as urgent that was problematic, 235 00:12:39,559 --> 00:12:43,120 Speaker 1: rather than the inputs themselves. And actually, if anybody my again, 236 00:12:43,120 --> 00:12:45,360 Speaker 1: my blog is the shoebox dot com t h E 237 00:12:45,520 --> 00:12:48,200 Speaker 1: s h U b o X. If you google like 238 00:12:48,280 --> 00:12:51,040 Speaker 1: texting and the shoebox, you'll find it. But it was 239 00:12:51,080 --> 00:12:54,400 Speaker 1: just from last week, and people left me really insightful 240 00:12:54,520 --> 00:12:57,319 Speaker 1: comments on kind of their thoughts on my thoughts, and 241 00:12:57,360 --> 00:13:02,400 Speaker 1: that's how I arrived at a few conclusions. Number one, 242 00:13:03,480 --> 00:13:05,640 Speaker 1: I turned off that read receipts thing, so you know 243 00:13:05,800 --> 00:13:08,199 Speaker 1: on an iPhone when you're texting and it's in blue. 244 00:13:08,600 --> 00:13:10,760 Speaker 1: When you're texting somebody, it'll say delivered and then it 245 00:13:10,760 --> 00:13:13,280 Speaker 1: will turn to red when they read it. I didn't 246 00:13:13,400 --> 00:13:16,080 Speaker 1: I must have an old phone because I don't see 247 00:13:16,120 --> 00:13:19,199 Speaker 1: that online, so it must I didn't even know. You 248 00:13:19,200 --> 00:13:21,000 Speaker 1: guys have a really old phone. When is the last 249 00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:23,280 Speaker 1: time you upaded out? It's like two years ago, But 250 00:13:23,440 --> 00:13:26,280 Speaker 1: I don't have That might be why, at least as 251 00:13:26,320 --> 00:13:28,120 Speaker 1: far as I know, maybe everyone's been seeing when I 252 00:13:28,160 --> 00:13:30,000 Speaker 1: read their text and I just don't know it, which 253 00:13:30,120 --> 00:13:32,400 Speaker 1: well you may want to, we'll do a test after 254 00:13:32,440 --> 00:13:35,559 Speaker 1: this is over. But yeah, so everyone can see when 255 00:13:35,600 --> 00:13:37,000 Speaker 1: it's delivered and when it's read. And I was very 256 00:13:37,040 --> 00:13:38,800 Speaker 1: I've always been very sensitive to that where it's like, oh, 257 00:13:38,880 --> 00:13:40,960 Speaker 1: they knew I opened it. You can turn that off. 258 00:13:41,200 --> 00:13:43,719 Speaker 1: You just go to settings messages and like allow read 259 00:13:43,760 --> 00:13:46,840 Speaker 1: receipts off. It's like very, very easy. And then all 260 00:13:46,840 --> 00:13:49,560 Speaker 1: of a sudden, nobody knows if the text they sent 261 00:13:49,600 --> 00:13:51,320 Speaker 1: to you just went off into the either whether you 262 00:13:51,360 --> 00:13:53,800 Speaker 1: read it, whether your phone is in your bag. And 263 00:13:53,840 --> 00:13:56,680 Speaker 1: that was like, I mean, that's such a small thing, 264 00:13:56,880 --> 00:13:59,760 Speaker 1: but all this I really felt like this huge weight 265 00:13:59,840 --> 00:14:02,920 Speaker 1: less did as I did it because all of a sudden, 266 00:14:02,920 --> 00:14:04,959 Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, well, go ahead and make your urgent requests, 267 00:14:04,960 --> 00:14:06,280 Speaker 1: but you don't know if I saw it or not. 268 00:14:06,400 --> 00:14:09,520 Speaker 1: And that that changed my mentality instantly. So that was 269 00:14:09,600 --> 00:14:12,080 Speaker 1: from my readers, so thank you. And then the other 270 00:14:12,160 --> 00:14:15,880 Speaker 1: thing was like people kind of it turned out that 271 00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:19,800 Speaker 1: the way people see texting really really varies, and it's 272 00:14:19,840 --> 00:14:23,320 Speaker 1: certainly very generational, like it seems like most people who 273 00:14:23,400 --> 00:14:26,000 Speaker 1: are sort of gen X and older are much you know, 274 00:14:26,040 --> 00:14:28,240 Speaker 1: there's certainly exceptions to the rule, but are much less 275 00:14:28,280 --> 00:14:30,080 Speaker 1: likely to text, and people will even say things like 276 00:14:30,160 --> 00:14:32,520 Speaker 1: I only email, or I tell people like I don't 277 00:14:32,560 --> 00:14:35,920 Speaker 1: text email me, whereas twenty five year old reader wrote 278 00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:39,600 Speaker 1: that I mostly communicate by text, but I don't expect 279 00:14:39,640 --> 00:14:43,240 Speaker 1: an immediate response because my generation treats texts like email. 280 00:14:43,640 --> 00:14:46,680 Speaker 1: So it's not about like needing an urgent response. And 281 00:14:46,720 --> 00:14:49,600 Speaker 1: that's sort of what gave me that perspective, like, oh 282 00:14:49,760 --> 00:14:53,480 Speaker 1: maybe it's it's my expectations are not everybody else's expectations, 283 00:14:54,040 --> 00:14:56,840 Speaker 1: and so actually my hatred of the media has gone down. 284 00:14:57,000 --> 00:15:00,280 Speaker 1: That was significantly in the last like four days about 285 00:15:00,320 --> 00:15:02,880 Speaker 1: like what texts are appropriate for I mean, and I 286 00:15:02,920 --> 00:15:05,240 Speaker 1: would agree that somebody that you know, you're trying to 287 00:15:05,240 --> 00:15:07,080 Speaker 1: get your doctor to do something, and there's a formal 288 00:15:07,120 --> 00:15:10,480 Speaker 1: communication for you to order lab tests, like they should 289 00:15:10,560 --> 00:15:13,720 Speaker 1: go through that, Like that's not I think so especially, 290 00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:16,400 Speaker 1: I mean, I totally understand if your doctor didn't respond 291 00:15:16,440 --> 00:15:18,800 Speaker 1: in a timely manner, like you went through the office 292 00:15:18,840 --> 00:15:21,200 Speaker 1: or the patient portal and in forty eight hours you 293 00:15:21,280 --> 00:15:24,920 Speaker 1: got no response, and or you really did need something urgently, 294 00:15:25,080 --> 00:15:27,240 Speaker 1: then you might send a polite text that's like so 295 00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:30,240 Speaker 1: sorry to text, please check the payment portal, I'm awaiting 296 00:15:30,400 --> 00:15:32,520 Speaker 1: blah blah blah. I mean that to me makes sense. 297 00:15:32,560 --> 00:15:35,680 Speaker 1: But to text at the same time as emailing, which 298 00:15:35,720 --> 00:15:39,880 Speaker 1: is what someone did, sort of to me, also felt insulting, like, oh, 299 00:15:40,160 --> 00:15:41,920 Speaker 1: she's not going to check this email, so I better 300 00:15:41,960 --> 00:15:43,360 Speaker 1: text her. But that that was on me. I mean 301 00:15:43,400 --> 00:15:45,040 Speaker 1: maybe in her mind she's like, I don't know if 302 00:15:45,480 --> 00:15:47,600 Speaker 1: doctor hartung Goer tests email, so I'll just let her know. 303 00:15:47,720 --> 00:15:49,600 Speaker 1: And that's the thing. A lot of people don't check 304 00:15:49,640 --> 00:15:51,240 Speaker 1: em out. I mean, I've sort of discovered those with 305 00:15:51,240 --> 00:15:53,440 Speaker 1: people under about age twenty five, is that they really 306 00:15:53,480 --> 00:15:55,840 Speaker 1: just don't like their email. I mean they and they 307 00:15:55,840 --> 00:15:58,320 Speaker 1: don't listen to voice messages either, so they're I mean, 308 00:15:58,360 --> 00:16:01,200 Speaker 1: the texting is the way to get in touch with them, 309 00:16:01,640 --> 00:16:03,880 Speaker 1: and from that perspective, I really like it, like you know, 310 00:16:03,880 --> 00:16:07,480 Speaker 1: communicating with babysitters, for instance, because I can quickly just say, 311 00:16:07,560 --> 00:16:10,360 Speaker 1: like what I would like, you know, when I would 312 00:16:10,360 --> 00:16:11,960 Speaker 1: like them to come and see if they can, and 313 00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:14,320 Speaker 1: then they text me back a response, usually pretty quickly, 314 00:16:14,360 --> 00:16:17,040 Speaker 1: and it's I don't like being on the phone that much. 315 00:16:17,040 --> 00:16:20,040 Speaker 1: I guess I'm I'm a I'm like a millennial that way, 316 00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:22,720 Speaker 1: even though I'm really not a millennial. No, I think 317 00:16:22,760 --> 00:16:25,160 Speaker 1: I think, well, you know, we're both like on that 318 00:16:25,280 --> 00:16:28,160 Speaker 1: cusp of millennial versus gen X, right in that middle 319 00:16:28,160 --> 00:16:30,440 Speaker 1: of port. I think most of our peers don't like 320 00:16:30,480 --> 00:16:33,720 Speaker 1: the phone either, Like I think that's actually typical. Yeah. So, 321 00:16:33,800 --> 00:16:37,240 Speaker 1: I mean I text to communicate for like play dates, 322 00:16:37,280 --> 00:16:38,880 Speaker 1: and you know, it's a good way to stay in 323 00:16:38,920 --> 00:16:43,160 Speaker 1: touch with extended family, and so I'm not negative on text. 324 00:16:43,240 --> 00:16:46,840 Speaker 1: But that's I think because only certain people have my 325 00:16:46,960 --> 00:16:49,800 Speaker 1: cell phone, and pretty much I want to hear from 326 00:16:49,840 --> 00:16:52,320 Speaker 1: all of those people. But I think if the proportion 327 00:16:52,480 --> 00:16:55,720 Speaker 1: went up that I had people who had my cell 328 00:16:55,720 --> 00:16:58,320 Speaker 1: phone that I didn't want to hear from, then I 329 00:16:58,360 --> 00:17:01,720 Speaker 1: would have a very differ perspective on it. I guess. 330 00:17:01,720 --> 00:17:04,160 Speaker 1: I don't know, because my email I give out freely. 331 00:17:04,240 --> 00:17:07,520 Speaker 1: I mean I give that anywhere. So email is a 332 00:17:07,640 --> 00:17:09,879 Speaker 1: less fun medium in that sense. I mean, you know, 333 00:17:09,920 --> 00:17:11,520 Speaker 1: we have listeners who want to email me. That's great. 334 00:17:11,520 --> 00:17:14,760 Speaker 1: I'd love to hear from you, but it's just out there, 335 00:17:14,760 --> 00:17:18,640 Speaker 1: so I get stuff that is not great. The cell 336 00:17:18,680 --> 00:17:21,480 Speaker 1: phone is not that way, so it's like all communication 337 00:17:21,640 --> 00:17:25,639 Speaker 1: that way is good stuff. Yeah, So yeah, it depends 338 00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:27,720 Speaker 1: where the inputs are coming from and how you've kind 339 00:17:27,760 --> 00:17:30,719 Speaker 1: of directed people to use one or the other. I 340 00:17:30,760 --> 00:17:33,080 Speaker 1: know that for me, one of the things that got 341 00:17:33,119 --> 00:17:35,480 Speaker 1: me off of Facebook was actually my work starting to 342 00:17:35,520 --> 00:17:37,640 Speaker 1: bleed into that. Like I had somebody like ask about 343 00:17:37,680 --> 00:17:40,359 Speaker 1: a rotation and I was sort of like, okay, this, 344 00:17:40,840 --> 00:17:43,080 Speaker 1: you know, I don't want to go here to look 345 00:17:43,119 --> 00:17:45,480 Speaker 1: at that, so maybe it's just over and then I 346 00:17:45,520 --> 00:17:49,159 Speaker 1: got off. As we discussed previously, so but on email though, 347 00:17:49,160 --> 00:17:52,200 Speaker 1: because if you want people to email you, you want 348 00:17:52,200 --> 00:17:56,200 Speaker 1: your friends to email you instead of texting, So how 349 00:17:56,240 --> 00:17:58,880 Speaker 1: do you deal with email them? Like, what's your I mean, 350 00:17:58,960 --> 00:18:01,280 Speaker 1: I don't mind again, I'm I'm really not. I'm only 351 00:18:01,320 --> 00:18:04,919 Speaker 1: anti text in certain I'm anti like overuse of texts 352 00:18:05,080 --> 00:18:07,080 Speaker 1: or again sort of reaching out to somebody with an 353 00:18:07,119 --> 00:18:09,239 Speaker 1: urgent request that's not urgent, And I'm actually not as 354 00:18:09,240 --> 00:18:11,920 Speaker 1: against that anymore. Again, as after it's sort of add 355 00:18:12,000 --> 00:18:14,199 Speaker 1: my epiphany of how you can deal with it. I mean, 356 00:18:14,240 --> 00:18:16,440 Speaker 1: I definitely have people ask for playdates and stuff via text. 357 00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:18,520 Speaker 1: I'm totally fine with that, but I do find that, 358 00:18:18,560 --> 00:18:20,720 Speaker 1: like if you're coordinating a large group of people or 359 00:18:20,720 --> 00:18:23,760 Speaker 1: maybe like three couples, email is easier because everyone can 360 00:18:23,840 --> 00:18:27,320 Speaker 1: kind of keep that chain. I don't know, maybe it's 361 00:18:27,359 --> 00:18:29,399 Speaker 1: maybe just in my mind, but I do prefer email 362 00:18:29,480 --> 00:18:32,080 Speaker 1: in those kind of situations. If it's just like a 363 00:18:32,080 --> 00:18:35,399 Speaker 1: one person plate or a babysitter, then texting kind of 364 00:18:35,440 --> 00:18:37,119 Speaker 1: makes sense to me. I can't stand when like a 365 00:18:37,160 --> 00:18:38,600 Speaker 1: group text gets out of hand and then you get 366 00:18:38,600 --> 00:18:40,200 Speaker 1: something every thirty seconds and then you're like, all of 367 00:18:40,200 --> 00:18:42,879 Speaker 1: a sudden, like fifty things behind, and somehow it doesn't 368 00:18:42,880 --> 00:18:45,160 Speaker 1: bother me when the same thing happens in email, even 369 00:18:45,160 --> 00:18:49,879 Speaker 1: when everyone's replying all great, thanks, Yeah, how do you 370 00:18:50,160 --> 00:18:53,399 Speaker 1: no problem? Oh? Please stop? How do you handle email? 371 00:18:53,560 --> 00:18:55,840 Speaker 1: Because I think we differ a lot in this world? Well, 372 00:18:55,920 --> 00:18:59,320 Speaker 1: I yeah, no, I mean I've got, let's just say, 373 00:18:59,400 --> 00:19:02,280 Speaker 1: a lot of emails in my in box side so 374 00:19:02,320 --> 00:19:04,919 Speaker 1: I don't file our archive anything. So there's just like 375 00:19:05,640 --> 00:19:09,240 Speaker 1: probably forty thousand emails in my inbox and the unread 376 00:19:09,400 --> 00:19:11,600 Speaker 1: is probably six hundred something. I'm looking at it, there's 377 00:19:11,600 --> 00:19:13,840 Speaker 1: six hundred and fifty three Like that would give me 378 00:19:13,880 --> 00:19:16,800 Speaker 1: a seed. But I don't understand why, like it doesn't 379 00:19:16,800 --> 00:19:19,760 Speaker 1: do anything. I mean, I'm I don't think all but 380 00:19:19,880 --> 00:19:22,720 Speaker 1: the last, like thirteen of those don't matter anymore, Right, 381 00:19:23,560 --> 00:19:26,280 Speaker 1: We'll see. Do you use Gmail? I No, I don't. 382 00:19:26,320 --> 00:19:29,399 Speaker 1: I'm still that's part of the problem, probably, I mean 383 00:19:29,440 --> 00:19:31,800 Speaker 1: with with I guess part of it is that I 384 00:19:31,960 --> 00:19:35,080 Speaker 1: use my email as like I actually empty it out 385 00:19:35,119 --> 00:19:39,800 Speaker 1: completely every weekend. It gets part of my weekend planning routine, 386 00:19:40,119 --> 00:19:42,480 Speaker 1: so it kind of sits there as an adjunctive to 387 00:19:42,560 --> 00:19:45,840 Speaker 1: do list. So if I have six hundred unread emails 388 00:19:45,840 --> 00:19:48,160 Speaker 1: in there, then to me, that signals, oh my god, 389 00:19:48,200 --> 00:19:50,400 Speaker 1: my life is that control. But that said, I am 390 00:19:50,440 --> 00:19:53,359 Speaker 1: not into meticulous archiving. I just I just mindlessly like 391 00:19:53,920 --> 00:19:56,240 Speaker 1: it's like clickoklick archive, and like I put them all 392 00:19:56,320 --> 00:19:58,399 Speaker 1: in one bucket because with Gmail it's very easy to 393 00:19:58,440 --> 00:20:01,240 Speaker 1: search for anything or anyone. So it's not like I 394 00:20:01,280 --> 00:20:03,959 Speaker 1: spend time like carefully dragging it into folders. They just 395 00:20:04,160 --> 00:20:06,960 Speaker 1: literally everything just goes into archives when it's not something 396 00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:10,320 Speaker 1: I need to, like see in MYODYA email is very searchable, 397 00:20:10,320 --> 00:20:12,639 Speaker 1: all the all the major emails are now searchable, and 398 00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:14,919 Speaker 1: it used to be and this is one of these 399 00:20:14,920 --> 00:20:17,520 Speaker 1: things of email evolving, Like I think fifteen years ago 400 00:20:17,560 --> 00:20:20,119 Speaker 1: it was not easily searchable, and so that's why people 401 00:20:20,560 --> 00:20:23,480 Speaker 1: learn to use folders. And but I mean, you can 402 00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:26,200 Speaker 1: even see this with the how emails treated. I mean, 403 00:20:26,200 --> 00:20:27,760 Speaker 1: I know people who when it first came out, they 404 00:20:27,760 --> 00:20:30,160 Speaker 1: would print up every email so they could read it 405 00:20:30,240 --> 00:20:34,479 Speaker 1: as if it was some exciting thing. Yeah, that's totally generating, 406 00:20:34,560 --> 00:20:38,040 Speaker 1: that's aspirational thing where it completely and and so now 407 00:20:38,359 --> 00:20:42,359 Speaker 1: I kind of feel like, yeah, it doesn't bug me 408 00:20:42,400 --> 00:20:44,879 Speaker 1: that that number is high because I'm not dealing with 409 00:20:44,960 --> 00:20:48,800 Speaker 1: anything after the past week or so anyway, And you 410 00:20:48,880 --> 00:20:50,800 Speaker 1: don't use it as any kind of to do. I 411 00:20:50,840 --> 00:20:55,840 Speaker 1: do not if I am. So what I will do 412 00:20:56,119 --> 00:20:58,200 Speaker 1: is is I will kind of read it a few 413 00:20:58,200 --> 00:21:00,280 Speaker 1: times a day. I might look through to see if 414 00:21:00,280 --> 00:21:02,600 Speaker 1: there's anything urgent I need to deal with. I'll try 415 00:21:02,640 --> 00:21:05,600 Speaker 1: to get to anything that I think needs to be 416 00:21:05,600 --> 00:21:08,159 Speaker 1: answered relatively quickly at some point toward the end of 417 00:21:08,200 --> 00:21:11,120 Speaker 1: the day. And then every three or four days I'll 418 00:21:11,119 --> 00:21:13,280 Speaker 1: do what I call like an email triage, where I 419 00:21:13,359 --> 00:21:16,320 Speaker 1: go back through to where I was current and caught up, 420 00:21:16,680 --> 00:21:19,040 Speaker 1: and if there's anything in there that I haven't figured 421 00:21:19,040 --> 00:21:21,159 Speaker 1: out how I want to answer that, or I know 422 00:21:21,200 --> 00:21:23,840 Speaker 1: that I haven't responded yet, I will write in my planner, 423 00:21:24,280 --> 00:21:27,199 Speaker 1: that person's name and maybe a note about it. So 424 00:21:27,520 --> 00:21:29,600 Speaker 1: you know, sometimes if there's something that's a little bit 425 00:21:29,640 --> 00:21:32,480 Speaker 1: more elaborate, like somebody's asking me if I could do something, 426 00:21:32,520 --> 00:21:34,120 Speaker 1: I'm really not sure if I want to do it, 427 00:21:34,280 --> 00:21:36,280 Speaker 1: and so I need to think about the answer. I 428 00:21:36,320 --> 00:21:38,919 Speaker 1: will write that person's name in my notebook, and then 429 00:21:38,960 --> 00:21:40,440 Speaker 1: I know that by the end of the week I 430 00:21:40,440 --> 00:21:42,320 Speaker 1: will probably get back to them one way or the other. 431 00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:47,199 Speaker 1: So that's where the email undone stuff goes, is in 432 00:21:47,240 --> 00:21:51,480 Speaker 1: the planner. Yeah, so you definitely have a very clear 433 00:21:51,600 --> 00:21:53,600 Speaker 1: way of handling it so that there's no reason that 434 00:21:53,600 --> 00:21:55,840 Speaker 1: those numbers should stress you up. Yeah, I think you're 435 00:21:55,840 --> 00:21:59,520 Speaker 1: trust me. I think you're also naturally like less inclined 436 00:21:59,640 --> 00:22:05,320 Speaker 1: to some people, including myself, definitely gravitate towards like the 437 00:22:05,359 --> 00:22:08,879 Speaker 1: clear surface, even if it's completely arbitrary, like you know, 438 00:22:09,040 --> 00:22:10,719 Speaker 1: Kan Mariy. As much as my life is not one 439 00:22:10,760 --> 00:22:13,040 Speaker 1: hundred percent conmory like that resonates with me. Whereas I 440 00:22:13,080 --> 00:22:15,760 Speaker 1: totally get the argument where it's like your argument which 441 00:22:15,840 --> 00:22:18,200 Speaker 1: makes total sense for many people, which is like no, 442 00:22:18,359 --> 00:22:22,040 Speaker 1: who cares, because you know, if you have things under control, 443 00:22:22,080 --> 00:22:24,440 Speaker 1: why worry about this thing? So I'm sure that it's 444 00:22:24,480 --> 00:22:26,800 Speaker 1: like the same part of my personality that really likes 445 00:22:26,800 --> 00:22:31,680 Speaker 1: the inbox. Yeah. No, I don't have clear surfaces very often. 446 00:22:31,960 --> 00:22:34,240 Speaker 1: And I mean you should see my desk, And people 447 00:22:34,240 --> 00:22:36,240 Speaker 1: get sort of funny about that because I write about 448 00:22:36,480 --> 00:22:40,800 Speaker 1: productivity and professionally, and so people sort of assume that 449 00:22:40,880 --> 00:22:44,400 Speaker 1: this involves a clean desk or a clean office or no, 450 00:22:44,600 --> 00:22:47,800 Speaker 1: it does not. And I would fully acknowledge that. It's 451 00:22:47,800 --> 00:22:49,720 Speaker 1: like it's like, it's not a product everything. It's just 452 00:22:49,720 --> 00:22:53,800 Speaker 1: like a preserence reference, psychological thing. And I think it's 453 00:22:53,920 --> 00:22:56,080 Speaker 1: and it's not that I'm opposed to clean surfaces, it's 454 00:22:56,080 --> 00:22:58,919 Speaker 1: just I'm not willing to invest the time in getting 455 00:22:59,000 --> 00:23:02,000 Speaker 1: to those clean surfaces. I know where things are, like 456 00:23:02,080 --> 00:23:05,600 Speaker 1: that's it's an organized mess. It just doesn't matter to 457 00:23:05,640 --> 00:23:08,359 Speaker 1: me if things are in like color coordinated folders or something. 458 00:23:08,400 --> 00:23:10,440 Speaker 1: I mean, that's that is a personal preference, as long 459 00:23:10,440 --> 00:23:14,160 Speaker 1: as you know where stuff is. But I think also 460 00:23:14,200 --> 00:23:16,280 Speaker 1: with what people get into trouble with this is that 461 00:23:16,320 --> 00:23:18,080 Speaker 1: they're checking it all the time because they want to 462 00:23:18,080 --> 00:23:21,040 Speaker 1: get to that inbox zero. And that's where it's a problem. 463 00:23:21,040 --> 00:23:25,359 Speaker 1: Because you email will expand to fill all available space, 464 00:23:25,720 --> 00:23:27,240 Speaker 1: and so people are trying to figure out how they 465 00:23:27,280 --> 00:23:28,960 Speaker 1: can spend less time on email, and they're coming up 466 00:23:28,960 --> 00:23:31,439 Speaker 1: with these sort of stupid hacks like typing K instead 467 00:23:31,480 --> 00:23:34,480 Speaker 1: of okay and whatever. But that is not going to 468 00:23:34,520 --> 00:23:37,240 Speaker 1: save you really any time. Typing the letter O is 469 00:23:37,240 --> 00:23:39,680 Speaker 1: not why you're not achieving things in your life. You've 470 00:23:39,720 --> 00:23:42,640 Speaker 1: got to put the important stuff into your life first 471 00:23:42,680 --> 00:23:45,760 Speaker 1: and then make email fill around that. And if you 472 00:23:45,800 --> 00:23:49,400 Speaker 1: do that, then then it probably doesn't actually matter as much, 473 00:23:49,520 --> 00:23:52,600 Speaker 1: you know, whatever your email system is, but make sure 474 00:23:52,600 --> 00:23:56,120 Speaker 1: you're doing what matters to you first and then get 475 00:23:56,119 --> 00:23:58,920 Speaker 1: to the email after that. And I do think there's 476 00:23:58,960 --> 00:24:01,639 Speaker 1: something to be said or like not like keeping your 477 00:24:01,640 --> 00:24:03,920 Speaker 1: inbox open and in front of you that you see 478 00:24:03,960 --> 00:24:07,640 Speaker 1: every time something pops up and on that same productivity 479 00:24:07,680 --> 00:24:10,480 Speaker 1: you know on the letter KK. This is really kind 480 00:24:10,520 --> 00:24:14,680 Speaker 1: of funny as a time saver, But don't necessarily check 481 00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:17,439 Speaker 1: email on your phone unless you're unless you need to 482 00:24:17,480 --> 00:24:20,760 Speaker 1: see something specific coming in, because it's much slower to 483 00:24:20,840 --> 00:24:23,000 Speaker 1: type out a response on your phone than it is 484 00:24:23,040 --> 00:24:25,680 Speaker 1: to quickly, you know, to type I think, at least 485 00:24:25,680 --> 00:24:29,320 Speaker 1: for me on an actual keyboard, so by like chunking 486 00:24:29,359 --> 00:24:30,879 Speaker 1: it into like Okay, well, I know I checked my 487 00:24:30,920 --> 00:24:33,399 Speaker 1: email at lunchtime or at the afternoon, rather than like 488 00:24:33,480 --> 00:24:36,320 Speaker 1: constant input input input input. I think it's I mean 489 00:24:36,320 --> 00:24:38,199 Speaker 1: that Manuta I think would argue it's better for our 490 00:24:38,240 --> 00:24:41,919 Speaker 1: brains not to have that like full steady dopamine drip 491 00:24:42,440 --> 00:24:46,160 Speaker 1: and to instead sort of corralogy. Yeah, I mean, deleting 492 00:24:46,200 --> 00:24:50,479 Speaker 1: email feels productive, like look at me, I'm getting all 493 00:24:50,520 --> 00:24:53,479 Speaker 1: my email deleted. And the problem, of course, is that 494 00:24:53,960 --> 00:24:56,560 Speaker 1: it isn't really productive in the grand scheme of things. 495 00:24:56,600 --> 00:24:59,600 Speaker 1: I mean, it's all it is is you can tell 496 00:24:59,640 --> 00:25:01,720 Speaker 1: you're going from one hundred down to zero. I mean, 497 00:25:01,800 --> 00:25:03,920 Speaker 1: who knows if you achieve great things in your professional 498 00:25:04,000 --> 00:25:05,800 Speaker 1: life or your personal life today, but you know, you 499 00:25:05,840 --> 00:25:07,840 Speaker 1: went from one hundred emails down to zero, and so 500 00:25:07,880 --> 00:25:10,440 Speaker 1: it's like yay, gold star for me. But whether you 501 00:25:10,480 --> 00:25:14,120 Speaker 1: actually accomplish anything that matters is an entirely different thing. 502 00:25:14,119 --> 00:25:15,560 Speaker 1: And I know that there are people who need to 503 00:25:15,560 --> 00:25:18,200 Speaker 1: be on email quite frequently. I'm not sure that it's 504 00:25:18,240 --> 00:25:20,720 Speaker 1: really the best means of group communication. I think a 505 00:25:20,720 --> 00:25:23,000 Speaker 1: lot of offices do much better with things like Slack 506 00:25:23,160 --> 00:25:27,240 Speaker 1: or certain forms of other communications for project management. But 507 00:25:28,280 --> 00:25:30,639 Speaker 1: if you are in an office where that happens, or 508 00:25:30,640 --> 00:25:32,520 Speaker 1: your clients are reaching out to you frequently on email, 509 00:25:32,560 --> 00:25:35,919 Speaker 1: you're still better off designating time to check it. And 510 00:25:35,960 --> 00:25:39,040 Speaker 1: even if that's once an hour, like that, you're on 511 00:25:39,119 --> 00:25:40,920 Speaker 1: for fifteen minutes and then you're off for forty five 512 00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:42,760 Speaker 1: and then you're back on for fifteen. Yeah, that's so 513 00:25:42,880 --> 00:25:45,119 Speaker 1: much better than the continuous, so much better that continues 514 00:25:45,160 --> 00:25:46,919 Speaker 1: because then you've got forty five minutes to actually do 515 00:25:47,040 --> 00:25:50,480 Speaker 1: something else, to think. And I think that's what bored 516 00:25:50,480 --> 00:25:52,000 Speaker 1: and brilliant. To bring it back to what we were 517 00:25:52,000 --> 00:25:55,119 Speaker 1: talking about with the book, like you want open space 518 00:25:55,160 --> 00:25:57,520 Speaker 1: where you can think, and I'm curious for you, when 519 00:25:57,560 --> 00:26:00,159 Speaker 1: do you have that open space in your life. I 520 00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:03,679 Speaker 1: think my open space is totally in the morning, and 521 00:26:03,720 --> 00:26:06,320 Speaker 1: that tends to be like why I like really crave 522 00:26:06,359 --> 00:26:08,760 Speaker 1: getting up before the kids. It's when I like sort 523 00:26:08,800 --> 00:26:11,000 Speaker 1: of thoughtfully plan out the day. I often will write 524 00:26:11,000 --> 00:26:12,960 Speaker 1: a post because it's almost like my mind needs to 525 00:26:13,160 --> 00:26:16,159 Speaker 1: dump stuff out. And I've actually made a point of 526 00:26:16,240 --> 00:26:19,040 Speaker 1: not always listening to podcasts in the car. I'll try 527 00:26:19,040 --> 00:26:22,200 Speaker 1: to do music, especially for some reason Monday morning, I'm 528 00:26:22,240 --> 00:26:23,920 Speaker 1: like music Monday. I don't know, it's like a thing 529 00:26:24,000 --> 00:26:26,240 Speaker 1: like I because I'd rather just have that time to 530 00:26:26,320 --> 00:26:29,880 Speaker 1: kind of process, and to me, music doesn't I mean, 531 00:26:29,880 --> 00:26:32,880 Speaker 1: it's not silence, but you know, your mind can wander 532 00:26:33,040 --> 00:26:36,000 Speaker 1: and kind of do its own thing when you're listening 533 00:26:36,040 --> 00:26:38,440 Speaker 1: to music, compared to if you're listening to someone talk 534 00:26:38,480 --> 00:26:40,320 Speaker 1: at you with a podcast or something like that. But 535 00:26:40,400 --> 00:26:44,680 Speaker 1: mornings are absolutely my my thoughtful time. What about you, Yeah, 536 00:26:44,760 --> 00:26:46,960 Speaker 1: I'm just trying to think when when my thoughtful time. 537 00:26:47,040 --> 00:26:49,480 Speaker 1: I would definitely say when I'm running. I don't listen 538 00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:52,000 Speaker 1: to music while I'm running. I mean, partly it's running 539 00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:54,360 Speaker 1: on roads. I feel a little, you know, nervous about 540 00:26:54,920 --> 00:26:56,639 Speaker 1: if a car would come up behind me while I 541 00:26:56,680 --> 00:26:59,679 Speaker 1: have my headphones in my ear. But uh, you know so, 542 00:26:59,720 --> 00:27:05,000 Speaker 1: I that's pretty much a thoughtful, meditative time. And writes 543 00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:08,720 Speaker 1: about they've studied what's going through people's brains when they're 544 00:27:08,720 --> 00:27:13,480 Speaker 1: not doing other things and just sort of autobiographical planning. 545 00:27:13,520 --> 00:27:17,399 Speaker 1: I love that phrase because that's totally what she talked about. 546 00:27:17,440 --> 00:27:20,240 Speaker 1: That It made me think of whenever I get a massage, 547 00:27:20,600 --> 00:27:23,320 Speaker 1: which is not often by the way, that is the 548 00:27:23,359 --> 00:27:26,960 Speaker 1: mode I go into. I'm always like thinking about I 549 00:27:27,000 --> 00:27:30,000 Speaker 1: don't know why. It like puts me into that mode immediately, 550 00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:31,639 Speaker 1: and I'm in it the whole time, and it's like 551 00:27:31,680 --> 00:27:34,639 Speaker 1: incredibly pleasant actually, And I guess some people would say 552 00:27:34,680 --> 00:27:36,600 Speaker 1: we should focus on the actual massage, but like, no, 553 00:27:36,720 --> 00:27:38,959 Speaker 1: that's my natural inclination is to like go to like 554 00:27:39,320 --> 00:27:42,320 Speaker 1: the future and like can I get more massages? You know, 555 00:27:42,400 --> 00:27:44,080 Speaker 1: what do I want to be doing in the next 556 00:27:44,080 --> 00:27:47,360 Speaker 1: few years? And yeah, and Manws points out that that's 557 00:27:48,640 --> 00:27:51,760 Speaker 1: it's a very happier people tend to go into sort 558 00:27:51,760 --> 00:27:56,159 Speaker 1: of future autobiographical planning, and less happy people tend to 559 00:27:56,200 --> 00:27:59,119 Speaker 1: fixate on past events. I mean, that's the one issue 560 00:27:59,119 --> 00:28:01,240 Speaker 1: that people don't want to be alone with our thoughts 561 00:28:01,280 --> 00:28:03,480 Speaker 1: sometimes because the thoughts will turn negative. And so if 562 00:28:03,520 --> 00:28:06,040 Speaker 1: you are prone to that, that's a different issue that 563 00:28:06,119 --> 00:28:07,880 Speaker 1: you might want to see if there's ways you can 564 00:28:07,880 --> 00:28:10,440 Speaker 1: address in terms of, you know, letting go of things 565 00:28:10,480 --> 00:28:12,400 Speaker 1: that might be more and more painful that you tend 566 00:28:12,400 --> 00:28:15,160 Speaker 1: to ruminate about a lot, but if you can get 567 00:28:15,200 --> 00:28:18,280 Speaker 1: into the mode where you are doing this autobiographical planning. 568 00:28:18,440 --> 00:28:20,920 Speaker 1: And I found that often what I'm doing is it's 569 00:28:20,920 --> 00:28:24,120 Speaker 1: like I'm composing blog posts and partly that's I guess 570 00:28:24,160 --> 00:28:27,399 Speaker 1: an occupational hazard. We're both dealing with that. We're putting 571 00:28:27,400 --> 00:28:30,000 Speaker 1: our life into the form of personal essays all the time. 572 00:28:30,920 --> 00:28:34,199 Speaker 1: But it's it is a way of processing things, and 573 00:28:34,280 --> 00:28:36,120 Speaker 1: so when I read something that's interesting, I'm like, well, 574 00:28:36,119 --> 00:28:37,720 Speaker 1: how could I write an essay about that? Or here's 575 00:28:37,720 --> 00:28:39,320 Speaker 1: something that's going to happen in my life, how could 576 00:28:39,320 --> 00:28:41,760 Speaker 1: I write an essay on that? And that thought process 577 00:28:41,840 --> 00:28:45,120 Speaker 1: really helps me work through it quite a bit. So yeah, 578 00:28:45,120 --> 00:28:49,760 Speaker 1: I'd say exercising is mostly when that happens. That's totally cool. 579 00:28:49,800 --> 00:28:52,320 Speaker 1: I actually always do a podcast or music when I'm 580 00:28:52,360 --> 00:28:55,800 Speaker 1: working out, So I'm impressed. I'm totally impressed. So you 581 00:28:55,840 --> 00:28:58,640 Speaker 1: had a few worite tips from your blog readers who 582 00:28:58,960 --> 00:29:00,920 Speaker 1: wrote a few more how they handle tech that we 583 00:29:01,040 --> 00:29:04,120 Speaker 1: may want to share a few of those. Well, I 584 00:29:04,560 --> 00:29:08,719 Speaker 1: just think it's it was very interesting, how sort of 585 00:29:09,880 --> 00:29:14,120 Speaker 1: very divisive. Some of these comments were, like I'll put 586 00:29:14,160 --> 00:29:16,080 Speaker 1: it out like somebody wrote, you know, I tend to 587 00:29:16,120 --> 00:29:18,120 Speaker 1: agree with a lot of your thoughts, but I'm opposite. 588 00:29:18,160 --> 00:29:21,240 Speaker 1: I'm so protexting as a means of communication. I don't 589 00:29:21,240 --> 00:29:22,920 Speaker 1: want my work email on my phone, but I don't 590 00:29:22,920 --> 00:29:25,720 Speaker 1: mind texts from colleagues and I prefer texting to phone calls. 591 00:29:25,960 --> 00:29:28,640 Speaker 1: And this person mentioned that she tried using that moment 592 00:29:28,720 --> 00:29:30,480 Speaker 1: app that's the one that tracks how many minutes you 593 00:29:30,560 --> 00:29:32,640 Speaker 1: use in your phone, and it stressed her out more 594 00:29:33,360 --> 00:29:35,600 Speaker 1: and she doesn't feel like her cell phone is doing 595 00:29:35,600 --> 00:29:38,080 Speaker 1: harm so that, you know, in her case, that's what 596 00:29:38,160 --> 00:29:40,480 Speaker 1: works for her. And reading that helped me to realize, oh, this, 597 00:29:40,600 --> 00:29:43,000 Speaker 1: you know, this really is kind of an individual thing. 598 00:29:43,320 --> 00:29:45,360 Speaker 1: And I wonder what Manush would think about that, because 599 00:29:45,400 --> 00:29:48,080 Speaker 1: her book definitely does frame you know, they don't frame 600 00:29:48,120 --> 00:29:50,920 Speaker 1: tech as evil in the book, but there is an 601 00:29:51,040 --> 00:29:54,240 Speaker 1: underlying you know, where are we going in the future 602 00:29:54,320 --> 00:29:56,719 Speaker 1: kind of panic with the fact that people are spending 603 00:29:56,760 --> 00:29:59,120 Speaker 1: more time and maybe it's just not harmful some people 604 00:29:59,600 --> 00:30:02,560 Speaker 1: and then other people. Again, I mentioned the read receipts 605 00:30:02,600 --> 00:30:05,520 Speaker 1: and responding to professional texts with an email. I really 606 00:30:05,560 --> 00:30:08,160 Speaker 1: like that, so you know, some just leave the you know, 607 00:30:08,240 --> 00:30:09,800 Speaker 1: now that I don't have read receipts, I can just 608 00:30:09,840 --> 00:30:12,720 Speaker 1: put no response and then just like initiate an email 609 00:30:12,720 --> 00:30:15,000 Speaker 1: if I'd rather the communication go to that and be 610 00:30:15,040 --> 00:30:18,240 Speaker 1: like I received your text. I do all professional communications 611 00:30:18,240 --> 00:30:20,720 Speaker 1: through email, and then go on with the you know 612 00:30:20,800 --> 00:30:23,440 Speaker 1: the actual body I love want to comment somebody left on. 613 00:30:23,560 --> 00:30:26,120 Speaker 1: I mean, the reason she doesn't like talking on the 614 00:30:26,160 --> 00:30:28,440 Speaker 1: phone is that it takes so much time and it 615 00:30:28,520 --> 00:30:30,400 Speaker 1: usually has to occur after the kids go to bed, 616 00:30:30,440 --> 00:30:33,560 Speaker 1: which I consider my time. Texting is nice because you 617 00:30:33,600 --> 00:30:35,680 Speaker 1: can have a conversation without being glued to the phone, 618 00:30:35,680 --> 00:30:38,200 Speaker 1: which I kind of agree with that. You know, a 619 00:30:38,240 --> 00:30:40,280 Speaker 1: phone call, like even if all you wanted to do 620 00:30:40,360 --> 00:30:42,640 Speaker 1: is check in and say hi, like then you're on 621 00:30:42,720 --> 00:30:44,320 Speaker 1: the phone, and so you kind of feel like you 622 00:30:44,360 --> 00:30:47,640 Speaker 1: have to stay on the phone. And then, especially if 623 00:30:47,880 --> 00:30:50,760 Speaker 1: you are dealing with little kids all day, towards the 624 00:30:50,880 --> 00:30:53,320 Speaker 1: end you may be done with dealing with other people 625 00:30:53,720 --> 00:30:57,000 Speaker 1: in a focused manner. And so I appreciated that. And 626 00:30:57,320 --> 00:30:59,680 Speaker 1: you know, my mom listens to this podcast on time 627 00:30:59,720 --> 00:31:02,080 Speaker 1: and she will tell you I'm horrible about calling her, 628 00:31:02,160 --> 00:31:05,480 Speaker 1: but I'm not that bad on text. So or maybe 629 00:31:05,520 --> 00:31:07,200 Speaker 1: texting is nice because it doesn't have to be a 630 00:31:07,240 --> 00:31:10,280 Speaker 1: full converse. Yeah, yeah, no, and it's more naturally praise 631 00:31:10,320 --> 00:31:12,200 Speaker 1: for that, like I'm still done that, you know, two 632 00:31:12,280 --> 00:31:14,240 Speaker 1: year old will keep waking up or then it's like 633 00:31:14,280 --> 00:31:16,440 Speaker 1: I have stuff that I need to get done, you know, 634 00:31:16,440 --> 00:31:19,600 Speaker 1: and that's the time I call. But you know, and 635 00:31:19,640 --> 00:31:22,120 Speaker 1: I'm not comfortable enough with talking on the phone while 636 00:31:22,200 --> 00:31:26,040 Speaker 1: driving that I do that much. So texting is really 637 00:31:26,080 --> 00:31:28,000 Speaker 1: a better way for me to keep in touch with 638 00:31:28,200 --> 00:31:30,760 Speaker 1: friends and family, and so I really appreciate it from 639 00:31:30,760 --> 00:31:35,080 Speaker 1: that perspective. I definitely like it with its time and place. 640 00:31:35,120 --> 00:31:36,600 Speaker 1: I find that like if I'm home with the kids 641 00:31:36,680 --> 00:31:39,320 Speaker 1: or it's bedtime and I'm getting texts, I can't because 642 00:31:39,760 --> 00:31:42,040 Speaker 1: I don't feel like I'm present on either end, and 643 00:31:42,080 --> 00:31:44,520 Speaker 1: then I feel bad. But I do think now I 644 00:31:44,560 --> 00:31:47,000 Speaker 1: feel more comfortable just you know, you send one text 645 00:31:47,000 --> 00:31:49,440 Speaker 1: like thinking of you, and then maybe you don't respond 646 00:31:49,560 --> 00:31:52,080 Speaker 1: until it's like the right time, you know, and that's okay. 647 00:31:52,280 --> 00:31:54,600 Speaker 1: That's a nice thing about texting is that that's not rude. 648 00:31:55,040 --> 00:31:57,040 Speaker 1: Versus if someone were to call you and you were 649 00:31:57,080 --> 00:31:59,040 Speaker 1: kind of like, oh, I'm so glad to hear from you, 650 00:31:59,080 --> 00:32:03,880 Speaker 1: I gotta go like that. That doesn't fly, all right? Well, 651 00:32:03,880 --> 00:32:06,280 Speaker 1: I think do we think have we covered it? Have 652 00:32:06,360 --> 00:32:08,960 Speaker 1: we covered? Yeah? I feel like we've called it and 653 00:32:09,520 --> 00:32:11,880 Speaker 1: we would love I feel like this one mate, Well 654 00:32:11,960 --> 00:32:14,520 Speaker 1: maybe people have already gotten out all of their That's 655 00:32:14,520 --> 00:32:16,880 Speaker 1: not my blog post, but there are probably readers who 656 00:32:16,920 --> 00:32:18,640 Speaker 1: don't read my blog and who read yours, or who 657 00:32:18,720 --> 00:32:22,239 Speaker 1: just listen. We would love to hear your hacks and 658 00:32:22,240 --> 00:32:25,160 Speaker 1: inputs and thoughts on this, and please include your kind 659 00:32:25,200 --> 00:32:27,680 Speaker 1: of age or generation, because I think that's I think 660 00:32:27,680 --> 00:32:29,760 Speaker 1: it's it's nice to know that in light of what 661 00:32:29,800 --> 00:32:31,600 Speaker 1: the thoughts are, since a lot of times those things 662 00:32:31,640 --> 00:32:33,960 Speaker 1: line up well. With that in mind, why don't we 663 00:32:34,840 --> 00:32:36,720 Speaker 1: skip over Love of the Week and come back to 664 00:32:36,760 --> 00:32:42,000 Speaker 1: that and do the Q and a sincere oh good idea, Yes, 665 00:32:42,120 --> 00:32:44,600 Speaker 1: we haven't a net well this is It won't be 666 00:32:44,640 --> 00:32:46,640 Speaker 1: a brand new announcement by the time this comes out, 667 00:32:46,720 --> 00:32:50,680 Speaker 1: but for everyone's information, there is an Instagram account now 668 00:32:50,720 --> 00:32:55,240 Speaker 1: specifically for this podcast. If you search best of Both 669 00:32:55,280 --> 00:32:57,920 Speaker 1: Worlds using the underscore, or I bet if you just 670 00:32:57,960 --> 00:33:00,720 Speaker 1: wrote typed in best of Both Worlds, podcasts into Instagram 671 00:33:00,840 --> 00:33:04,160 Speaker 1: will come up and you will be able to follow along. 672 00:33:04,200 --> 00:33:06,200 Speaker 1: I'll make sure to leave a post for each episode 673 00:33:06,200 --> 00:33:09,840 Speaker 1: so that people can leave comments there. And if there 674 00:33:09,840 --> 00:33:12,280 Speaker 1: are other pictures or tidbits, like for example, when we 675 00:33:12,320 --> 00:33:14,880 Speaker 1: do our planner one, I'm gonna have to include some photos. 676 00:33:15,480 --> 00:33:18,120 Speaker 1: Then we'll make sure to post those on Instagram as well. Yeah, 677 00:33:18,320 --> 00:33:20,120 Speaker 1: we're saying this is sort of a meta Q and 678 00:33:20,160 --> 00:33:23,320 Speaker 1: a of a listener Q and a where can I 679 00:33:23,400 --> 00:33:27,160 Speaker 1: leave comments to ask questions for this podcast? So yeah, 680 00:33:27,200 --> 00:33:32,560 Speaker 1: our new Instagram, you can I do a podcast thread 681 00:33:32,640 --> 00:33:36,200 Speaker 1: each week on the discussion on Tuesdays when it goes up. 682 00:33:36,240 --> 00:33:38,600 Speaker 1: So you can come to Laura Vandercam dot com. That's 683 00:33:38,640 --> 00:33:42,120 Speaker 1: just my name and join. Yeah, and she has lively comments, 684 00:33:42,120 --> 00:33:45,200 Speaker 1: so I highly they're great. You check out those posts 685 00:33:45,360 --> 00:33:49,760 Speaker 1: better than the majority of stuff on the internet, I'd agree. 686 00:33:50,200 --> 00:33:52,640 Speaker 1: You can also email me. As we've discussed, I may 687 00:33:52,720 --> 00:33:56,080 Speaker 1: have hundreds of unread messages in my inbox, but I do. 688 00:33:56,600 --> 00:33:58,760 Speaker 1: I would say I respond to about ninety percent of 689 00:33:58,800 --> 00:34:01,320 Speaker 1: stuff that comes in from peopleople on on this. I 690 00:34:01,320 --> 00:34:03,000 Speaker 1: mean sometimes people are just like great, loved it, and 691 00:34:03,280 --> 00:34:05,440 Speaker 1: you know, I'll even respond. Thanks for that. Try not 692 00:34:05,480 --> 00:34:08,560 Speaker 1: to pull out people's inboxes, but yeah, no, El Vanderkam 693 00:34:08,640 --> 00:34:11,880 Speaker 1: at yahoo dot com. You can certainly email me podcast 694 00:34:12,000 --> 00:34:15,680 Speaker 1: questions if you have them or comments. I'd love to 695 00:34:15,719 --> 00:34:18,600 Speaker 1: hear it. And then Sarah, Sarah, you've got your blog too, 696 00:34:19,680 --> 00:34:21,719 Speaker 1: I've got my blog. You can also email me at 697 00:34:21,760 --> 00:34:26,040 Speaker 1: shoebox blog s h U b l o G sh 698 00:34:26,280 --> 00:34:30,680 Speaker 1: box bog at gmail dot com, or you can text 699 00:34:30,760 --> 00:34:33,080 Speaker 1: me just Canna. She does not want your text. As 700 00:34:33,160 --> 00:34:36,000 Speaker 1: we've learned from from earlier in this episode, do not 701 00:34:36,080 --> 00:34:39,000 Speaker 1: text Sarah, although we were texting this morning, right, So, 702 00:34:39,040 --> 00:34:43,200 Speaker 1: I after she posted this blog about like don't text me, Like, okay, 703 00:34:42,480 --> 00:34:47,280 Speaker 1: I've alienated everyone. No, I had to actually like actively 704 00:34:47,360 --> 00:34:49,480 Speaker 1: text some of my closest friends and be like, I 705 00:34:49,520 --> 00:34:51,560 Speaker 1: want you to know that this was not like, that's 706 00:34:51,560 --> 00:34:53,560 Speaker 1: not I didn't mean it for family members. I didn't 707 00:34:53,560 --> 00:34:55,000 Speaker 1: mean I meant it for what I meant it for. 708 00:34:55,200 --> 00:34:58,360 Speaker 1: So yeah, because texting, and also for like you know, 709 00:34:58,400 --> 00:35:00,360 Speaker 1: you were running a little behind for or something. I 710 00:35:00,360 --> 00:35:01,560 Speaker 1: had to deal with it with one of your kids 711 00:35:01,600 --> 00:35:03,920 Speaker 1: this morning. That's a good thing for texting, right that 712 00:35:04,000 --> 00:35:07,279 Speaker 1: you know exactly. And honestly, I do feel like I've 713 00:35:07,280 --> 00:35:11,279 Speaker 1: grown a little bit, honestly in my attitudes because now 714 00:35:11,360 --> 00:35:14,839 Speaker 1: I kind of understand that it's it's not necessarily such 715 00:35:14,840 --> 00:35:17,000 Speaker 1: an urgent request. That was just how I was seeing it. 716 00:35:17,280 --> 00:35:20,960 Speaker 1: So I hope there's others that might benefit similarly. So 717 00:35:21,640 --> 00:35:23,400 Speaker 1: love of the Week, right, Love of the Week. I 718 00:35:23,520 --> 00:35:26,359 Speaker 1: don't want to forget that. Okay, mine is a very 719 00:35:26,560 --> 00:35:30,080 Speaker 1: low tech love of the week, And I mean, is 720 00:35:30,120 --> 00:35:31,239 Speaker 1: it okay to have a love of the week that 721 00:35:31,239 --> 00:35:36,040 Speaker 1: you just got straight from another podcast? I heard about 722 00:35:36,040 --> 00:35:39,080 Speaker 1: this on the Happier podcast approximately a month ago. That's 723 00:35:39,120 --> 00:35:43,080 Speaker 1: Gretchen Ruben and Liz Craft's very popular podcast, and I 724 00:35:43,120 --> 00:35:45,040 Speaker 1: put it. I immediately put a note in my planner like, oh, 725 00:35:45,040 --> 00:35:46,920 Speaker 1: I need to do this, and I did it. So 726 00:35:46,960 --> 00:35:50,120 Speaker 1: what the idea was was to make keepsake boxes keepsake 727 00:35:50,400 --> 00:35:53,799 Speaker 1: boxes for your children by just using a regular old 728 00:35:53,800 --> 00:35:57,040 Speaker 1: filebox and then making folders for each year, so you know, 729 00:35:57,120 --> 00:35:59,239 Speaker 1: all the way going from pre K. I even have 730 00:35:59,280 --> 00:36:02,560 Speaker 1: a three phone learn for Cameron to grade twelve, and 731 00:36:02,600 --> 00:36:05,040 Speaker 1: then just using that as a place to put like 732 00:36:05,080 --> 00:36:08,280 Speaker 1: their best artwork or school pictures, you know, like the 733 00:36:08,280 --> 00:36:10,560 Speaker 1: the stuff that just kind of had them. I had 734 00:36:10,560 --> 00:36:13,160 Speaker 1: everything sort of in one someday maybe file in my 735 00:36:13,200 --> 00:36:16,239 Speaker 1: filing cabinet, but it was getting ridiculous. I feel so 736 00:36:16,320 --> 00:36:18,760 Speaker 1: good now like they had. And I think it's also 737 00:36:19,239 --> 00:36:20,960 Speaker 1: you know, even if I put too much stuff, let's 738 00:36:20,960 --> 00:36:22,719 Speaker 1: say in the three year old folder, then it's okay. 739 00:36:22,760 --> 00:36:23,759 Speaker 1: I can go through it at the end of the 740 00:36:23,800 --> 00:36:26,120 Speaker 1: year and make sure it's like a reasonable size file 741 00:36:26,200 --> 00:36:29,040 Speaker 1: to make sure everything's going to fit. But I'm just 742 00:36:29,080 --> 00:36:30,920 Speaker 1: super happy to have a place for all that stuff 743 00:36:31,000 --> 00:36:33,360 Speaker 1: and and I hope I can keep up with it 744 00:36:33,400 --> 00:36:36,080 Speaker 1: all the way through the years. Yeah, my stuff like 745 00:36:36,080 --> 00:36:37,800 Speaker 1: that was kind of in a big pile in the basement. 746 00:36:37,840 --> 00:36:39,960 Speaker 1: There was a filing cabinet, and then the filing cabinet 747 00:36:40,000 --> 00:36:43,760 Speaker 1: got full, so it's clearly it needs you need separate 748 00:36:43,760 --> 00:36:46,960 Speaker 1: boxes for each kid. Yeah. So my love of the 749 00:36:47,000 --> 00:36:52,040 Speaker 1: week is a high tech one is FaceTime. So you know, 750 00:36:52,480 --> 00:36:54,600 Speaker 1: it's the thing with the I phones they give and 751 00:36:54,640 --> 00:36:56,960 Speaker 1: they take and we can talk about how they pollute 752 00:36:56,960 --> 00:36:59,120 Speaker 1: our downtime and we want to spend more time not 753 00:36:59,200 --> 00:37:01,319 Speaker 1: figure out. Some times they do really cool things too. 754 00:37:01,320 --> 00:37:04,480 Speaker 1: I mean, the fact that I can call my kids 755 00:37:04,520 --> 00:37:08,160 Speaker 1: when I'm away and see their faces is really awesome 756 00:37:08,280 --> 00:37:10,279 Speaker 1: if you think about it. I mean that was like 757 00:37:10,719 --> 00:37:13,000 Speaker 1: twenty years ago that would have been considered like crazy 758 00:37:13,040 --> 00:37:16,520 Speaker 1: futuristic that you could just see people's faces on your phone. 759 00:37:17,040 --> 00:37:20,279 Speaker 1: But it's it's pretty cool if you think about it. 760 00:37:20,280 --> 00:37:22,600 Speaker 1: It's totally and you're right keeping in touch with family. 761 00:37:22,640 --> 00:37:25,319 Speaker 1: It's the best for because you may live really far 762 00:37:25,360 --> 00:37:28,440 Speaker 1: and otherwise your kids, you know, they need that visual 763 00:37:28,440 --> 00:37:32,080 Speaker 1: stimuli to like know, you know, remember who everyone is 764 00:37:32,120 --> 00:37:35,600 Speaker 1: sometimes even so, yeah, it's definitely an odd There are 765 00:37:35,640 --> 00:37:40,360 Speaker 1: many many wonderful things about smart PHAs. We love ours, 766 00:37:40,719 --> 00:37:43,080 Speaker 1: you know, it's it's how we keep in touch with 767 00:37:43,120 --> 00:37:46,000 Speaker 1: the world, and we met each other online. So I mean, 768 00:37:46,040 --> 00:37:49,880 Speaker 1: it's that's true. That is true. So yeah, there's a 769 00:37:49,920 --> 00:37:52,080 Speaker 1: lot of positive But I think we also just have 770 00:37:52,160 --> 00:37:55,319 Speaker 1: to be intentional because it can take us over intentionality. 771 00:37:55,400 --> 00:37:59,480 Speaker 1: That could be our our message, be intentional, be mindful 772 00:37:59,480 --> 00:38:01,840 Speaker 1: about all it. Well, this has been Best of Both 773 00:38:02,000 --> 00:38:06,480 Speaker 1: Worlds Episode twelve. We've been talking about how we handle tech, 774 00:38:06,600 --> 00:38:13,040 Speaker 1: so tune in next week for our next episode. Thanks 775 00:38:13,040 --> 00:38:16,080 Speaker 1: for listening. You can find me Sarah at the shoebox 776 00:38:16,120 --> 00:38:20,480 Speaker 1: dot com or at the Underscore Shoebox on Instagram, and 777 00:38:20,520 --> 00:38:24,640 Speaker 1: you can find me Laura at Laura vandercam dot com. 778 00:38:24,760 --> 00:38:27,960 Speaker 1: This has been the Best of Both Worlds podcasts. Please 779 00:38:28,040 --> 00:38:30,640 Speaker 1: join us next time for more on making work and 780 00:38:30,719 --> 00:38:31,840 Speaker 1: life work together.