00:00:08 Speaker 1: And I invited you here. I thought I made myself perfectly clear. When you're a guest to my home, you gotta come to me empty. And I said, no, guests, your presences presents enough. I already had too much stuff, So how do you dare to surbey me? 00:00:49 Speaker 2: Welcome to I said, no gifts. I'm Richer Wineger. Thank you for meeting me here. We're here on the podcast. I'm what's going on. I've had another classic Bridger Wineger mourning. Everything has just been I was angry at someone this morning, but I redirected the energy in a positive way, and now I'm angry at everyone and it's working for me. It's working for me. I'm it's charging me up. I'm powering through my day, just getting madder and madder at everyone I come in contact with. So that is kind of what I'm doing before lunch. You know, I haven't had lunch yet, and I'm realizing my lunch is going to be delayed because we're starting recording at Noon's what day of the week is it? Even it doesn't matter to anyone. I've brought no new information to you as a listener yet, and that's good. That's a positive thing on a podcast is I should look and see if I have no I don't, I mean outside of Patreon. Well, I I'm sure I've mentioned patri recently, but I should mention it again. We're having the time of our lives on Patreon, Patreon dot com slash I said, no gifts. It's flourishing everyone over there. It's a little walled garden of delight. Everybody's having the time of their life. I'm having the time of my life. Special guests. We've had Naomi k Peragan, We've had my mom, We've had Jimmy Smagoula. All kinds of people come over come support the podcast. I mean it costs a probably a thousandth of a Netflix subscription at this point. So I don't know, there's just kind of no excuse. I don't want to hear anything about it. I think I've dragged everyone through whatever. This was long enough. I think we should get into the podcast. Today's guest is absolutely delightful. It's Katherine McCafferty. Catherine welcomed. I said, no gifts. 00:02:55 Speaker 3: Hello, thank you so much for having me. 00:02:57 Speaker 2: I'm so happy to have you here. 00:02:59 Speaker 3: I'm a little servis that you're mad at me now based on that intro, Okay, great, not yet, Okay, I can't wait to dig myself out of a hole. 00:03:08 Speaker 2: And it's going to be a deep hole. Yeah yeah, yeah, inescapable. Absolutely. 00:03:13 Speaker 3: I start every interaction with every single human being. I'm like, you're on a pedestal and I'm a tiny rat mouse. 00:03:20 Speaker 2: I'm ready to make mistakes. Just get on your nerves. Yeah no, I can't imagine, but I can, so just be careful for the next hour or so. 00:03:30 Speaker 3: I love walking. I'm broken glass. 00:03:33 Speaker 2: I'm on my lasson. Yeah, you were in some sort of traffic on the way here. I was also in similar traffic, sort of. 00:03:41 Speaker 3: La are you from? Where are you from? 00:03:43 Speaker 2: I'm from Salt Lake City? Okay, where are you from? 00:03:45 Speaker 3: I'm from Chicago. 00:03:46 Speaker 2: Okay. 00:03:47 Speaker 3: We drive fast there. Oh and La, people don't drive fast. They actually, I think, make a point of driving ten miles below the speed limit, like per hour. And I'm floored when I get on the expressway and I go, oh, we're all going forty really neighborhoods, Yes, and I am. I mean, I'm a menace to society. When I am in my car, I'm constantly just sort of screaming at no one. But that's where I get out all of my rage. So then I arrived to a place kind of like fluster, apologizing to everyone sweating. 00:04:30 Speaker 2: No, I think I've tried to piece together why driving in LA is so particularly bad, and my theory, I've come to the conclusion that almost everyone here is a transplant. Yes, almost everyone here thinks they're more important than everyone else. Correct, And almost everyone here thinks that they all need to be to their place on time before everyone else. And so but that all melts together with no one knowing where they're going. Oh, yes, and so everyone's kind of going too slow. 00:04:58 Speaker 3: On their phone on their phone an emo. Yes, I'm constantly sending voice texts when I'm in my car, so it never makes sense. It's voice two text, it's not a voice note. 00:05:09 Speaker 2: Right, So yeah, the voice I've recently, for whatever reason, my car updated or my phone updated to it no longer letting me do that in the car. Oh, I can no longer get in touch with the phone. 00:05:21 Speaker 3: Oh my god. Cool. 00:05:23 Speaker 2: It feels like a good safety feature to be like, no, we want you to be using the phone. 00:05:27 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, you got to use your thumbs on this one. 00:05:29 Speaker 2: And this was when I had just gotten used to, like was finally kind of trusting how bad it was. And I knew it would say sent by Siri. I I won't say it so my phone doesn't freak out. Yeah, and so I would at least know that the recipient would know. That's why it was a disaster. 00:05:43 Speaker 4: Of a text. 00:05:44 Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, yeah, But. 00:05:45 Speaker 2: Now I'm trapped in my car just being mad at the phone. But you're sending you are Are they long texts? 00:05:51 Speaker 3: Or oh yeah they're long? There long may make no sense. There's so many like misspellings. But what I want to be communicating as usually that I'm late. Oh and then also some kind of tidbit about my day. So my friends all know that my friends are all like third detectives, and I feel like I'm doing them a favor, right because I'm like, I'm giving you sort of like a fun puzzle for your morning. You're welcome. 00:06:18 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's something you can decipher. You don't need connections or wordle or anything. It's just a text from cast. 00:06:23 Speaker 3: This's just a text from me. I've always been like that though, and I don't use punctuation my text, and I've been told that that's a huge turnoff. 00:06:31 Speaker 2: Somebody told you that that was a turnoff. 00:06:33 Speaker 3: Yes, that I don't use punctuation. It was when I was dating men, so it was a while ago. 00:06:39 Speaker 2: Okay, Oh, and that would get me away from men as well. 00:06:43 Speaker 3: Yeah, and yeah, that was it, this job that broke the camera's back. I said, I'm. 00:06:47 Speaker 2: Gay, honey, men's demand for punctuation made me gay. 00:06:52 Speaker 3: Yep, mm hmm. That was the whole thing. There's nothing else that's wrong with straight men, nothing else. You heard it here first, Okay, it's just their insistence on punctuation. 00:07:04 Speaker 2: That is a crazy thing to ask for. I don't I don't use any I mean I will if I finish a sentence and have one more sentence, there will be a period between the two. 00:07:12 Speaker 3: But well, that's the kind of punctuation he was talking about. 00:07:15 Speaker 2: So it was just run on sentences. 00:07:17 Speaker 3: Yeah, I was texting like I was speaking, do you know what I mean? I speak very fast and you got to keep up and he was just slow. 00:07:25 Speaker 2: So but so if you like with a if you were asking a question, there would be no question mark. 00:07:31 Speaker 3: I don't have time for that like that, like that, and then I feel like it's a great like indicator if you're going to be like on my same page in terms of like, you can pick up jokes. We don't have to explain ourselves like you're in the cadence of my mind immediately. 00:07:48 Speaker 2: Which is a nightmare, but it's a delightful one. 00:07:52 Speaker 3: I would I want to share it with the person that I love, Right, you should be part of my nightmare. Love it. 00:07:58 Speaker 2: That's what a relationship is is two people sharing one night man. Yeah, people can tell if they're getting a voice to text for me, if there are if there's a lot of punctuation, if the whole thing ends with a period or a question Marke, It's like, this is not Bridger, this is a computer is in charge right now? Yes, And I almost want to ask the phone, will you just not put any. 00:08:23 Speaker 3: Don't finish that? 00:08:24 Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't need you to do that for me. But there's really nothing you can do. 00:08:28 Speaker 3: No, you can't. You can't reason with a phone. 00:08:31 Speaker 2: No, there's absolutely not for me. When I was able to do the voice to text, I would rehearse in my mind several times before I would even contact the phone. Genie. I would say this is how I'll say it so I don't get too flustered. Amazing, and then if it's screwed up, I just gave out. 00:08:46 Speaker 3: Yeah, that's important. It's important to bring back giving up. 00:08:50 Speaker 2: Do you ever send a voice note? 00:08:52 Speaker 3: Yes, I love a voice note. Although I was in another problematic relationship brag. This one was with a woman, so even when men can be bad, and she did not like more than a minute long voice note, to the point of saying, I won't listen past a minute. 00:09:13 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, even if it's got a great hook. Yeah, what if it's exciting, I. 00:09:17 Speaker 3: Know, and like what if I can get you on the phone, do you know what I mean? And I'm not great at texting, and I don't I don't love a text conversation because you can't hear like the emotion in like what's going on? So to me that that was an act of terrorism, it's a domestic act of terrorism. Because I was then immediately I'll change myself because again I'm Midwestern, and so I was like, okay, absolutely, whatever you say is probably the right way to date, you know, And so then I was just editing myself down. But I love a long voice note because I listened. 00:09:54 Speaker 2: To podcasts right. It is just kind of like a free podcast. 00:09:57 Speaker 3: Yeah, and it's a podcast by your friend. 00:10:00 Speaker 2: Yes, a very personal right there for you? What a dream this? My one pushback on a voice note is well, it's not even that, it's just if it is over a minute long. Yeah, the person just has to then expect me to listen to it whenever. It could be a day before I get back to you. 00:10:14 Speaker 3: No, it can be. I think that it can be a week, because I have a friend who will send me like seven minute long voice notes like and she'll maybe some like three in a row, and I save those and I go, okay, I'm going to catch up with my good friend Leah once I have like a little coffee break. 00:10:32 Speaker 2: Yeah, you cannot put an urgent question or anything in a voice note because you're just going to hear from me days from now. Yes, and there are certain friends for all again and I'm just be like. 00:10:42 Speaker 3: You, oh sure, name names, first and last addresses. Thank you. 00:10:48 Speaker 2: But then there are other other friends from like what a gift. I've gotten a little fun present from them. I know this will be entertaining. They have a story to tell. 00:10:56 Speaker 3: Absolutely. I love like gossip. Also in a voice note, because dangerous because mine automatically says. 00:11:03 Speaker 2: Oh, how do you do that? This is what I need? 00:11:05 Speaker 3: It's in settings somewhere. Oh, because when I have a crush, I will open up like sort of the voice note, like I'll open up that mode of communication to see like is it going to be taken? Like are you going to send one back? And then you can see if they've saved it. But then I did have a crush who had the settings on that saved every single voice note. So I really read into that and I was like, oh my god, she wants it. She's saving all my bos notes. And she was like, oh no, I'm doing that with everyone in a heap. 00:11:39 Speaker 2: Yeah. I was like, oh shit, but this is great. You're a journalist in this way saving all of these notes. I could become a journalist. Yes, save all of this gossip. 00:11:48 Speaker 3: And then you have stuff on people. 00:11:49 Speaker 2: Right, they're all just vanishing. I could have. I could have blackmail on everyone in my life at this point. 00:11:54 Speaker 3: I mean truly. And that's that's friendship. Okay, she solved love and now we're solving friendship. Friendship is blackmail. Love is a nightmare. Friendship is blackmail. 00:12:06 Speaker 2: Anyway, blackmail is making sure they're in your life and that you're interacting with each other at high stakes, and I think that that's fun and emotional. 00:12:13 Speaker 3: I agree with you. We are on the same page here. 00:12:17 Speaker 2: You're deepening the relationship by threatening them and getting things out of them. 00:12:20 Speaker 3: Yeah. And I don't know why I don't have a lot of friends. 00:12:27 Speaker 2: What's going on in your life? What's exciting for you right now? 00:12:30 Speaker 3: Oh gosh, well, I'm actually about to go on tour and we're going to go to Salt Lake City. 00:12:34 Speaker 2: Oh, where are you going in Salt Lake Totally? That's a great name for a club. Actually club totally. 00:12:42 Speaker 3: I should absolutely know the answer to this. But it's big, big. Normally I think a music venue. 00:12:53 Speaker 2: The Energy Solutions Arena, Yes it is. I think that's what it's called. 00:12:57 Speaker 3: Now. 00:12:58 Speaker 2: That's where the Touch has play. 00:13:00 Speaker 3: Oh okay, it. 00:13:01 Speaker 2: Used to be called the Delta Center, and then I think some sort of nuclear waste facility took over, which we loved it. 00:13:06 Speaker 3: That's actually where we're performing, and we're performing there. They put us there. But I want to know, like, are there a lot of gay people in Salt Lake City? 00:13:14 Speaker 2: Yes? 00:13:14 Speaker 3: Okay, cool? 00:13:15 Speaker 2: Yes, I am friends of the podcast, Jordan Myrick and Kendall Landreth. I love Salt Lake City. 00:13:22 Speaker 3: I love them and I was actually and you heard it here first, folks, because I have not actually asked them, but I wanted to take them to Salt Lake City. Good because they're married, and then I could either date them both individually. 00:13:36 Speaker 2: Or totally very solid. 00:13:40 Speaker 3: Well that Oh, I didn't even put that together. Oh wow, that's the concept of the show that I do. I go on like these mock dates. 00:13:49 Speaker 2: Oh I like this, Yeah, I like this. No, there are a lot of gay people, and there are a lot of people in Salt Lake Proper who are who want their great audiences. They love they want town. Yeah, it's like a it's a breath of fresh air. 00:14:05 Speaker 3: Amazing. 00:14:05 Speaker 2: I've heard you know, you go to concerts growing up or whatever, and bands will be like you, guys, like, we haven't seen an audience like this, and you're like, oh, I'm sure, and then you get out of the state and you still hear that about Utah. 00:14:17 Speaker 3: Okay, Okay, I'm. 00:14:18 Speaker 2: Not setting you up for a disappointment. 00:14:20 Speaker 3: I know you might be, but we're doing like we're doing a show in La and in La it is hard to perform, and so I feel like anything outside of LA will be a treat. 00:14:29 Speaker 2: Oh my god, you feel like the Beatles. 00:14:32 Speaker 3: Not to ship on LA. It's just that there's so much like talent here, and so many people who need to finish their screenplay. 00:14:40 Speaker 2: They need to and we are rooting for them. 00:14:43 Speaker 3: And I want you to finish your screenplay and I want you to cast me in it. 00:14:46 Speaker 2: Okay, So like whatever, No, this is not a not a super thrilling town to do live anything. Everyone is maybe if you're a musician. I don't even think that I go to. 00:14:59 Speaker 3: People here, I know, don't they want to be seen? Like I imagine how people just want to be seen listening to music. 00:15:09 Speaker 2: I believe that a uh No. I I'll sometimes go to a concert and I feel bad for the band because I'm like, and the venue will be pretty fold, but everyone's such a dud. Yeah, La people are dud guys. I don't know. I don't get it. Yeah, And then I feel like I'm taking on a lot of the work clapping. 00:15:29 Speaker 3: Oh, I'm I'm the most enthusiastic audience number even at like comedy shows, because I'm like, I came here for a reason, and it wasn't to cross my arms and be angry. 00:15:40 Speaker 2: I do that everywhere else exactly. 00:15:41 Speaker 3: I could be at home doing that now. 00:15:44 Speaker 2: I'm if I'm with somebody who dragged me there, different might be a different story. And I'm trying to prove a point to the performer and my friend and I'm a real dud. 00:15:54 Speaker 3: Yeah. 00:15:55 Speaker 2: So, but I think you're gonna have such a good time in Salt Lake, and there's some good food there. It's what time of you are you going? 00:16:00 Speaker 3: We're going May twentieth. 00:16:02 Speaker 2: Oh, it's going to be so beautiful. You should try to stop. Buy something called I think it's called Gilgal Gardens. It's like weird. It's like this little free park with very strange art. Okay, it's almost indescribable. But there's like a sphinx with Joseph Smith's face on it. Oh yeah, I'm going it's worth stopping for sure. 00:16:23 Speaker 3: I'll walk through. 00:16:24 Speaker 2: Okay, Well, I'm excited for you. Are you driving on tour flying? 00:16:27 Speaker 3: I also don't know the answer to that. 00:16:29 Speaker 2: Oh my god, I know. 00:16:30 Speaker 3: I keep trying to get in touch with the powers that be, and they're like, well, we'll sett a call and so it's a mystery, but it's a fun mystery. 00:16:39 Speaker 2: Yeah, wait till the last minute. 00:16:40 Speaker 3: Who cares? 00:16:42 Speaker 2: You're like a road trip. 00:16:44 Speaker 3: I wouldn't say that. 00:16:45 Speaker 2: I like a road okay. 00:16:46 Speaker 3: But I'm also like, if that's the vibe of the whole tour. I'm committing. I'm committing to a theme and so I can really get into like, well, the theme is road trip. 00:16:58 Speaker 2: Yeah. I don't think you could do not tour without being excited about it being a road trip. Yeah, because that would be agony. 00:17:05 Speaker 3: I'm not alone also, so that's good. I have like a little bing bong with me, a b a big bong, you know, like that little like a little clown you bring with you everywhere. She's a human woman. Her name is her name is Calin Mahoney. She's very talented, but she like sits on stage with me and we do like a little thing together. So and so she's going to be at every show. So I wouldn't be driving by myself, and I feel like that would be hell for me. 00:17:33 Speaker 2: I'm not sure if he likes. 00:17:34 Speaker 3: To be by yourself. 00:17:35 Speaker 2: I like being on the open road, listening to music. My mind's wandering. I'm drifting through towns. 00:17:42 Speaker 3: I can't have my mind wander too much. Again, it's a nightmare. 00:17:49 Speaker 2: Where else are you going on tour? 00:17:50 Speaker 3: We're going to uh, Phoenix, Arizona. Okay, I'll name them backwards. We're going to the Phoenix. Then we're gonna be in Sandy Diego, La, San Francisco, Portland, Seattle, Vancouver. 00:18:08 Speaker 2: But we start in Vancouver, Oh, and then get like to Phoenix. 00:18:13 Speaker 3: Yeah, I would imagine that we would fly to pix Well, Phoenix is the largest venue that they booked us. Yeah, and that is also my face. So I really hope there's a lot of gay people in Phoenix, right. 00:18:28 Speaker 2: I guess we just have to allow cities to surprise. 00:18:30 Speaker 3: Us absolutely, and if there's not, then it will be just like an intimate It will be an intimate show in a huge space. 00:18:39 Speaker 2: It'll be like meeting one person in their mansion probably here. 00:18:46 Speaker 3: Special and we'll use this space. We'll run around, you know, it'll be gym class. 00:18:50 Speaker 2: Actually, have you been to Phoenix before? 00:18:53 Speaker 3: Hmmm, I don't remember. We drove My brother and I drove from Chicago to LA during sort of a chaotic time in our lives, so I don't quite know the route that we took, right, but we went through Arizona. 00:19:08 Speaker 2: Okay, Yeah, my guess is you did not go through Phoenix. You would know, Yeah, you would know you'd been through Phoenix. 00:19:15 Speaker 3: My brain was somewhere else. It was outside my body. 00:19:18 Speaker 2: I've been through. I've been to Phoenix. I've been through the airport. The airport is an exciting thing because you look out and it really is like cartoon desert. It really feels so fascinating to look at. 00:19:27 Speaker 1: Ok. 00:19:28 Speaker 2: Then and you also know I don't have to stay here. Yes, and again, I'm sure there's plenty of wonderful things about Phoenix. 00:19:34 Speaker 3: Yeah, I've heard good things, and I'm trying to people who have left. 00:19:41 Speaker 2: There's something good and something horrible about really any city. 00:19:44 Speaker 3: Yeah, we shot. We shot upon the city that we live in. So, like all the time, there's something that will deter you from being in a place, no matter. 00:19:52 Speaker 2: What, right, And I feel like I'm like hyper sensitive to it because growing up in Utah was like I mean, it's like outside of New Jersey, like number one by the jokes on every piece of entertainment. So I'm like I try to be cautious about making fun of other people's cities and then I fail and make fun of them. 00:20:10 Speaker 3: Yeah, well, that's okay, you're getting back, you're getting back at all. 00:20:14 Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, speaking of getting back at things and revenge and people making mistakes, I was looking forward to having you here on the podcast, and I'm not going to retaliate. The podcast is called I said, no gifts. Yes, I imagine you were aware of that, at least on your drive here. So I was a little surprised when you kind of waltz into the studio holding not one, but two gifts. 00:20:43 Speaker 3: Yeah, I know, Bolt. 00:20:46 Speaker 2: Okay, are these gifts for me? They are? 00:20:49 Speaker 3: But I told you at the beginning of this. 00:20:52 Speaker 2: Yes, I love I don't know how that happened, but half of the studio. 00:20:55 Speaker 3: Displays I'm alit. 00:21:01 Speaker 2: It was me. This is the thrill for a video viewer. 00:21:05 Speaker 3: Yes, I said, how dare you criticize me? 00:21:10 Speaker 2: We're going to review the footage and see what you were actually doing. Right. Wow? 00:21:15 Speaker 3: Do we reset or do we just keep going? 00:21:17 Speaker 2: No, we stop down. We have a whole crew come in and I'm gonna leave. We'll start recording again in Yeah. 00:21:26 Speaker 3: No, I told you at the beginning of this that I like to dig myself out of a hole, and I was thinking, how do I put myself in that hole? Well, i'll go against the name of the podcasts. 00:21:37 Speaker 2: You like to dig yourself out of a hole? Okay, we'll see. Should we open them here on the podcast? 00:21:42 Speaker 3: I think so we should start with the more colorful Dad. 00:21:48 Speaker 2: What a fun little bag. It's got kind of like a fun pattern. It's gonna make a good pair of pants or shorts. 00:21:54 Speaker 3: For a tiny, tiny person. 00:21:56 Speaker 2: Oh, look at that looks like a cute little skirt. Actually a little for my dolls there, dolls. Okay, I'm reaching in. 00:22:04 Speaker 3: It's a hodgepodge. And you might say, Catherine, did you even think about these things? 00:22:08 Speaker 2: Are there are several things in here? 00:22:10 Speaker 3: Yes? Okay? 00:22:10 Speaker 2: Should I pull them out one at a time? 00:22:11 Speaker 3: Yeah? Okay, okay, because I thought like that's dumb. 00:22:20 Speaker 2: No, I think this is good. This is a piece of your merchant's pretty gay on. 00:22:23 Speaker 3: It and you actually can't buy it because we stopped making it, so. 00:22:28 Speaker 2: This is limited. Okay, I'll get on eBay now, Okay, let's keep pulling out for a moment here. Yeah, women support women, Okay. 00:22:37 Speaker 3: I have a lot of stickers and I'm constantly buying little stickers because in my head they're good gifts like socks, but they're actually not. 00:22:48 Speaker 2: Yeah, I would push back on that. I would say a sticker is maybe something like in the card of another gift. 00:22:56 Speaker 3: Absolutely yeah, But I said no, I said full gift. And so a creator reached out to me with I believe this person is getting a divorce or something. They really went into it, and I believe it and I love that. But they're trying to rebuild their business, and they said, will you please buy stickers from me? And I said, of course I will, And then I instantly forgot that I did that. 00:23:17 Speaker 2: How do they get in touch with you? 00:23:19 Speaker 3: And I got Instagram because this godless? They're all this. 00:23:25 Speaker 2: This is a star that says women deserve better? 00:23:27 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, okay, And I wanted you to know that. 00:23:33 Speaker 2: Where does this sticker go better? 00:23:37 Speaker 4: The White House? 00:23:39 Speaker 3: I said, I would be screaming on this podcast and I delivered. Yeah, so mail that to whoever you think needs it. 00:23:47 Speaker 2: I'm going to put this on the inside of a men's bathroom stall. Yes, good reminder. 00:23:52 Speaker 3: Yeah, I love that. 00:23:53 Speaker 2: Hey guys, Yeah, women deserve better? Yeah. 00:23:56 Speaker 3: An Ally, I'm an ally, and. 00:23:59 Speaker 2: I'm going to set these Oh no, I'm not going to set them back. Okay, Oh there are more. 00:24:02 Speaker 3: Okay, so and there's another. 00:24:06 Speaker 2: Let's be very clear. So far, I've disagreed with every single one of these stickers. This women are power. 00:24:12 Speaker 3: Yeah you said no, No they're not. 00:24:13 Speaker 2: We're saying no to that. 00:24:15 Speaker 3: No they're not. If they were, we wouldn't share on them so much. 00:24:18 Speaker 2: Now this is a sticker. This is born and Raised. 00:24:20 Speaker 3: Yeah, and that is I am from Chicago. Yeah, that's the Chicago flag. That is Yeah. I wanted you to have a little piece of me. 00:24:28 Speaker 2: Wait, so the Chicago flag says born and Raised on it? 00:24:31 Speaker 3: No? No, no, just the stars? 00:24:32 Speaker 2: Oh, just the stars. So this is baffling. 00:24:35 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, where did you get this? I would say, if I were being honest and aunt give it. Interesting, that's actually a regift and. 00:24:45 Speaker 2: The stickers run in the family. 00:24:46 Speaker 3: Then I guess I guess maybe that's where I get it. 00:24:49 Speaker 2: Are you getting back to Chicago that often? 00:24:52 Speaker 4: Not? 00:24:53 Speaker 3: No, I mean probably every other Christmas? 00:24:56 Speaker 2: Okay. 00:24:56 Speaker 3: And then whenever I go, like I like to go to see the people who might die soon? Right, Oh? 00:25:01 Speaker 2: Interesting, and you have to so they do that is it like a warning sign to people who you're visiting in Chicago. They're like five. 00:25:07 Speaker 3: Times thow it is now, honey. But I have a lot of family that is still in Chicago, including my mom, and I like her a lot. 00:25:18 Speaker 2: Okay, Yeah, it's a decent reason to visit a city. Liking your mom. 00:25:22 Speaker 3: Yeah, I always schedule a show when I'm there, so she is always like, you couldn't just visit, and I'm like, no, I'm sorry. I also have to make money. I'm an entrepreneur. 00:25:34 Speaker 2: That would be a waste of time to just visit with a I don't think so. I did a live show there last year and had a wonderful time, but I kind of let myself down. 00:25:43 Speaker 3: You did a live show at the same time I was doing a live show in Chicago. 00:25:47 Speaker 2: In Chicago, we were. 00:25:49 Speaker 3: Dueling, Yes, we were dueling. No, your guest also has red hair. 00:25:54 Speaker 2: Oh brendan'scanel. 00:25:56 Speaker 3: Yes. 00:25:56 Speaker 2: Yes, I love. 00:25:57 Speaker 3: Brendon exact the live show you were talking about, Yes, because we did a show at the Lincoln Lodge and he hit me up to do stand up on that show. 00:26:06 Speaker 2: And did he Yeah, he did, and he was to night. 00:26:09 Speaker 3: I think he was going to yours or coming he was going to yours after because he came to mine. 00:26:15 Speaker 2: He had ninety or something, yes, and he had been to dinner and he brought me as the gift his leftovers. 00:26:22 Speaker 3: Amazing. 00:26:22 Speaker 2: The chicken was already dry. 00:26:25 Speaker 3: Where was it from? 00:26:27 Speaker 2: Like a famous Greek place? I can't remember. I let myself down in Chicago because I only went to essentially one restaurant the entire because I just didn't want to stray from the area that I was staying. 00:26:38 Speaker 3: Where were you staying? 00:26:40 Speaker 2: Great question, it's kind of cool, and there's a good bakery and Lincoln Park. 00:26:47 Speaker 3: There's a lot of like cool. 00:26:48 Speaker 2: I would remember Lincoln Park. I wish I could remember anything. I just went to that, the Hamburger place, a bunch oh cheval or small chival. 00:26:58 Speaker 3: You would think that I would know all the famous places. 00:27:00 Speaker 2: You've been gone for a while. 00:27:01 Speaker 3: I've been gone for a while. And also I'm allergic to everything fun, so I don't know good food none at all. No, I can't have like gluten because I'm siliac. You can a dairy. I choose not to eat red meat because I'm annoying. And then like I can't have like a smattering of other things like beans or peanuts. 00:27:20 Speaker 2: Oh my god. Yeah, but I feel like my sister Celiac, and there's a world of enjoying food within Celiac especially. I feel like with a lot of like Asian food, Yes, like Mexican food, you can get. I can get decent Celiac friendly stuff. 00:27:37 Speaker 3: Yes, it's like the beans and the cheese really get me. Oh okay, But you can get a great taco or cud. 00:27:43 Speaker 2: Che yes, absolutely absolutely. And then you have Indian food, Thai food. I feel like there's all kinds. 00:27:49 Speaker 3: Of options there are. If you're willing to be annoying and ask a bunch. 00:27:53 Speaker 2: Of questions, you kind of have to commit to being annoyed. 00:27:56 Speaker 3: You do, yeah, and that's you. 00:27:58 Speaker 2: That's a power you have over other people. Oh, thank you for being irritating. Okay, I think you should take that. 00:28:04 Speaker 3: I'll take that. Yeah, I'll take that as a compliment. Absolutely. 00:28:08 Speaker 2: If you can be irritating in particular situations, no one can do anything against it. 00:28:13 Speaker 3: No, because I guess to be like, it's an allergy. 00:28:15 Speaker 2: Yes, exactly. You need to own that. 00:28:18 Speaker 3: It's an allergy. And I did insist on coming to this burger place, psycho. 00:28:25 Speaker 2: Okay, let's keep going there. 00:28:26 Speaker 3: One more thing there is, let's see. Okay, so that is something that I made on a date. 00:28:31 Speaker 2: Whoa, it's like a miniature sushi plate. 00:28:34 Speaker 3: Yes. So I went over to this girl's house and she had crafts set up for us to do, and I was like, yeah, I'm all in on this, and I just didn't I don't know like how to use that. Like I did try to incorporate it into like a hairstyle once I made a couple of those. 00:28:54 Speaker 2: Okay, but oh so is it like a hair clip? 00:28:57 Speaker 3: No, I wouldn't use it as that, Okay, but I think it's just like a little clip because it opens, which is which is kind of like kishe k. 00:29:06 Speaker 2: Kitch kitchen just so ciche. This is very keiche. 00:29:13 Speaker 3: So I don't know. I threw that in there just as a wild card because I was like, what if he hates stickers, you know, he hates gifts, what if he hates stickers? And this is something I made with my bare hand. 00:29:24 Speaker 2: I'm trying to figure out how you made this? 00:29:27 Speaker 3: Like, okay, so what actually it is is she had all these little things that like you get in like a mystery pack and you don't know what's inside, and it's those like little little guys. So the little sushi guy, right, there's also like a little taco and like all little foods and then you just glue it onto. Oh yeah, really simple. It's just hot. It's just hot glue. So I didn't like paint, but no, I'm not like making the little plastic sushi. 00:29:59 Speaker 2: No, I was imagining was a very different thing. 00:30:02 Speaker 3: Yeah, And so we just made like a bunch of those. 00:30:05 Speaker 2: It's still fun. 00:30:06 Speaker 3: It was a really fun date. 00:30:07 Speaker 2: I'm not entirely sure, like what because it's like on a nice little sushi plate and it's like sushimi on rice. Is that that's what this is? Is course, but then it's in like a weird warming or like uh like there's a clear bubble that goes over it, so it's like a serving dish. 00:30:24 Speaker 3: Yeah, so it's likeda and I can't really like place this in the real world outside of miniatures. 00:30:32 Speaker 2: I guess maybe like on a whole hotel room floor. Yes, okay, to. 00:30:37 Speaker 3: Have a fancy sushi restaurant once where they like put like smoke inside and then they and then they opened it. 00:30:45 Speaker 2: Right so maybe it's that very experimental food or something and then it can clip onto something. 00:30:52 Speaker 3: Yeah, you're welcome. Hey, you're welcome. It was made with love. And can you imagine flirting and like trying to like not get hot glue on your fingers and just being like no, okay, so yeah, where are you from? 00:31:05 Speaker 2: You know, how are you doing? Hot Glue's dangerous? Are you burning your fingers there? 00:31:09 Speaker 3: Yeah? 00:31:09 Speaker 2: Not No, I need a hot glue gun. 00:31:13 Speaker 3: Yes, everyone should have one. You can do anything with hot glow. 00:31:16 Speaker 2: You could protect your home. 00:31:17 Speaker 3: Absolutely, yeah, sort of. You you do need to like refill and that that takes a minute. 00:31:25 Speaker 2: But I feel like there is like you run into a lot of things where you could use hot glue in your house, yes, and then when you don't have it around, what a bummer? What a bummer? 00:31:34 Speaker 3: Yeah? Like how do you fix things? 00:31:36 Speaker 1: Right? 00:31:36 Speaker 3: It's a toilet handle fell off my glue and. 00:31:39 Speaker 2: I love a hot glue stick. Yes, where do you get those Michaels? Yeah? 00:31:43 Speaker 3: I think just at any crafting store. 00:31:45 Speaker 2: When was the last time you were in a Michael's. 00:31:47 Speaker 3: Hmmm, that's an excellent question. It was definitely this year. I like crafts, like getting little things, especially for like the show. U oh sure, yeah, so we'll like yeah, I don't know, Yeah, I've probably been this year. I also like typically around Halloween, I'm in a Michael just wandering right. 00:32:11 Speaker 2: I would say Michael's needs to get it together. 00:32:15 Speaker 3: Oh yeah. It's like insane that it still exists, because you walk in, you go, why is the yard everywhere? Like nothing makes sense? The aisles are it's like, yeah, we have jewelry and ale on one, and then we also have jewelry and nine and ten and the bottom shelf of twenty nine and you're like the dumpster huh. And yeah there are like little like carts, like these metal carts that just have like a bunch of shit in them, and you're like, what do you. 00:32:42 Speaker 2: Mean deciding what goes in the metal carts? 00:32:44 Speaker 3: I think it's an employee who doesn't get paid enough, who is done with their shift and said I needed to put all of these away. No, no, there's something now, Yeah, they're in something. 00:32:56 Speaker 2: Yeah. I don't know when the turn was, because I feel like there was a period in the last ten years or so when I could go in Michaels and things were on the shelves really. Now, I'm like, I'm wading through things. 00:33:07 Speaker 3: Yes, I just felt like Michael's maybe was always like this, but I was younger. Oh interesting, right, you were more patience and didn't know how. 00:33:17 Speaker 2: Stuff worked, had more hope for the world. 00:33:19 Speaker 3: Ye walked in and was like ooh, scavenger hunt. You know. 00:33:24 Speaker 2: Well if they took that's what the that's the marketing angle they should take. See if you can find it. 00:33:29 Speaker 3: Yeah, and if you find everything on your list, you get like a little. 00:33:33 Speaker 2: Prize, you get to buy it. 00:33:35 Speaker 3: Yeah, then you get to buy it. Yeah. Okay, so then this, okay, that's okay. This is what I would like to call on an excellent Oh my god, it's the only useful sticker. 00:33:50 Speaker 2: Okay, well, okay, disagree. I'm going to put all of these on my bumper. 00:33:55 Speaker 3: Yeah. 00:33:56 Speaker 2: Those are just let somebody know that I'm falling apart emotionally. Okay, let's see pulling this out. Oh, this is such a useful gift. And it's not just like you found these in the junk drawer. This is a whole thing. 00:34:12 Speaker 3: None of these have been used yet today, none of them have been used. That would be insane to give you you. 00:34:17 Speaker 2: We should take a look back at our past guests. 00:34:19 Speaker 3: But if you look closely, there was one used stamp and I filled it in with something. 00:34:28 Speaker 2: With the Santa. So the rest of the stamps are beautiful hummingbirds and then and it's the Garden Delights collection and then Santa, which is kind of will I'll have to use a hot glue gun to put it on you. 00:34:43 Speaker 3: Yeah, which I didn't take it off of an envelope though, I just took it off of another sheet, so it hasn't been used. You can still use Santa run a letter. 00:34:51 Speaker 2: Because they the way, they make sure they put a stamp over it so you could tell this is still a usable I'll save that for the holidays. 00:34:58 Speaker 3: Or I mean, I don't know, branch Oh, yes exactly. 00:35:02 Speaker 2: You're gonna have Christmas every day you could. 00:35:05 Speaker 3: And I want to explain why these gifts feel like this because I had a plan to get you like a really fun, weird thing, which was a cameo. 00:35:19 Speaker 2: Oh. 00:35:20 Speaker 3: I thought, okay, that'll be fun, and then I looked at cameo and I was like, the people that I like on cameo way too expensive. Haven't even met this man? Not dropping two hundred bucks but then I was like, Okay, it might also be fun to get him the cheapest cameo oh from a dog. Okay, but the turnaround time and I had this place, I said, Catherine, it's on the to do list. It's on the to do list, and I did it last night, so it didn't I don't think it delivered, but you will be getting that. But can I read to the one of the most psychotic prompts that it gave me? 00:36:03 Speaker 2: Please? Okay, who's running the dog's cameo account? 00:36:07 Speaker 3: I would imagine the owner? 00:36:08 Speaker 2: Yeah, or is it like one of these things where the dog calls nine to one to one. It's like, yeah, the dog has created a cameo for itself. 00:36:16 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's just really really smart. 00:36:18 Speaker 2: So they're giving you prompts to give to the dog. 00:36:21 Speaker 3: So how can Okay, let me see if I can pull up my cameo because I did have to also like make an account. 00:36:28 Speaker 2: Yeah, I've never ordered a cameo. I I guess I should get into them so support some people who are falling apart. 00:36:36 Speaker 3: Yeah, cameo has slid into my DMS no less than five thousand times to be like you should be on cameo and I'm like, I really shouldn't. 00:36:46 Speaker 2: I'm not there yet. Leave me alone. 00:36:48 Speaker 3: I really can't be doing that. I don't have a ton of service. But I did take a screenshot of what I wanted to share, so instead I will do that. Okay, great, Okay, So you can and who it's for, and then you write in why you're getting the cameo so it can be like birthday, anniversary, cute little note, and then one of the things is pep talk. I said, obviously, that's what I'm gonna choose, and then this is for it was going to be a Wiener dog to deliver this cameo. Now I looked at the I looked at the examples of the cameos that this Wiener dog has done, and it's a lot of like a Wiener dog on a bed sort of walking across a note, which is really great. 00:37:34 Speaker 2: Like the owner has like scribbled out the message on a note. 00:37:36 Speaker 3: Yeah, but imagine this is this cost me three dollars, So like that's correct, okay, and it's not a famous dog, not yet, okay, So then you can go in and give instructions to the dog on like what this person needs a pep talk okay, but it gives you a little prompt and it says, like an exam ample might be my stepdad is feeling instacure about being a good role model. Remind him how lucky we are to have him in our lives. 00:38:10 Speaker 2: What's going on in that? 00:38:13 Speaker 3: Devastating to like be going through something and then get a cameo from a wiener dog being like, you're a good role model, stepdad? 00:38:23 Speaker 2: Stepdad's ready to leave. 00:38:25 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like absolutely not. I'm feeling myself today. 00:38:29 Speaker 2: Do you know what's happening? I know it is so dark. 00:38:32 Speaker 3: I know. 00:38:33 Speaker 2: Why couldn't the propt just be like we're having a big game. 00:38:36 Speaker 3: Yes, we're having a big game and I want him to do a great job. 00:38:40 Speaker 2: Why did it have to be a family falling apart? 00:38:43 Speaker 3: It always is, It's always a family falling apart. So I will send that to you. 00:38:48 Speaker 2: Okay, please, I'm so excited about that. What else can you could you do? Like a court summons with a cameo? I bet you no, that probably has to be in person. 00:38:56 Speaker 3: Oh right, yeah, you have to be like, right, somebody served their wife like in a very public way. 00:39:04 Speaker 2: Oh yes, actor this happened, Ah, yes, Jason Jis while she was on stage being an award or something. 00:39:15 Speaker 3: It was a shit move. 00:39:17 Speaker 2: That was really a wile. 00:39:19 Speaker 3: It was you got to be like, you have to get over the fact that she cheated on you with whatever Harry styles. 00:39:25 Speaker 2: Is that what happened. 00:39:26 Speaker 3: No, I'm starting that rumor today right now. 00:39:29 Speaker 2: This is so weird. I was just thinking about that weird movie oh that. 00:39:33 Speaker 3: They did together. They were together at some point, but I don't think there was any kind of cheating scandal. 00:39:39 Speaker 2: Okay, but there's the movie where they're all in the desert, but then they're in the matrix or something. 00:39:43 Speaker 3: Yeah, that's it. That's it. But then there's Housewives. 00:39:47 Speaker 2: Yes, there's that kind of a like a mid century housewives feel, but they are also in the matrix. 00:39:53 Speaker 3: Yeah, but they're like dolls being like fed at home or something. I don't know. 00:40:00 Speaker 2: It I watched it. 00:40:03 Speaker 3: I did. I saw it on my television. 00:40:06 Speaker 2: I guess I need to see it. This actually sounds wonderful to me. 00:40:10 Speaker 3: Yeah, I think it was interesting. But again, if this is how I'm describing it. However, Olivia Wild, if you want to work with me, I think your ex husband did a shitty thing. 00:40:25 Speaker 2: But Jason ted Lasso reached out. 00:40:31 Speaker 3: Sometimes people cheat. 00:40:34 Speaker 2: Relationships are complicated. 00:40:35 Speaker 3: Oblgated their nightmare. We said it earlier. 00:40:38 Speaker 2: Our spouses are going on stage, they're receiving awards, they're directing Harry Styles. 00:40:43 Speaker 3: Yeah, and you can't say no to Harry. 00:40:45 Speaker 2: No, no one can say no to Harry. 00:40:47 Speaker 3: I would. I have a Harry Styles story which you may or may not need to edit this out just because you might be like you're being mean and stupid. 00:40:57 Speaker 2: I support that. 00:40:59 Speaker 3: So I I got to go to SNL because I was dating somebody who was a director who like knew somebody whatever, it didn't matter. We went to and they were like shadowing this director, and so we went to the taping and Harry Styles, I think was the musical guest. But I am so out of it, like I didn't what part of what one direction was he one direction? Okay, so I think it was Harry by himself, or maybe it was one direction. I don't know. This is a long time ago, but they were singing that watermelon song where it's just like they just say like watermelon over and over and over again, watermelon, watermelon, water melon, watermelon. I got the giggles because I was like, there's no way this is a real song. This is so stupid, and so I'm losing my mind laughing. My partner horrified, is like kicking me, being like you're being so inappropriate. I'm like, okay, we're at a comedy show. So just because, just because the musical guest was where I laughed the most. 00:42:07 Speaker 2: Sign But it was like watermelon, watermelon, watermelon. 00:42:11 Speaker 3: Watermelon, watermelon. I think I don't know. I think it's it's watermelon sugar. 00:42:16 Speaker 2: Oh okay, yes, this is starting to seem like something I've heard. 00:42:20 Speaker 3: It is popular, but I never heard it before. And then obviously after that I had heard it like on the radio. 00:42:25 Speaker 2: And I was favorite song. 00:42:26 Speaker 3: Yeah, and now it was my wedding song. I danced down the aisle to it watermelon modelmeon, but I was like, this is stupid, right, come on. There were like no lyrics, It's just watermelon. 00:42:40 Speaker 2: Women deserve better. 00:42:42 Speaker 3: Hey, the sticker said it first born and raised women deserve better. 00:42:48 Speaker 2: Watermelon, watermelon, watermelon, watermelon. So did he confront you? Were you confronted by Harry after the show? 00:42:54 Speaker 3: No? Unfortunately, not famous enough. Yeah, it doesn't care at all, but send this to him. 00:43:02 Speaker 2: Clip this Harry Styles reach out, Yeah. 00:43:05 Speaker 3: Reach out. I have beef with a few music music else Okay ed Cheran, Okay, correct, I think that Ed Cheron should pay me money. 00:43:13 Speaker 2: Why should he pay you money? 00:43:14 Speaker 3: Okay, it's crazy that he's still. 00:43:15 Speaker 2: Relevant number one still ever, but. 00:43:19 Speaker 3: Also like congrats, you know, you know how to do your career. He got on I guess he got on Game of Thrones. 00:43:26 Speaker 2: You Oh, he was kind of probably maybe a low point in his career to be on Game the show, wouldn't you say? Oh sure, I certainly were watching that guy sing And what was he singing? I'm pretty sure he's saying. 00:43:40 Speaker 3: I don't know, Yeah he was singing. Oh he was singing. Was he like a main character? 00:43:45 Speaker 2: No, he was just like somebody around a fire or something. 00:43:49 Speaker 3: I think, Oh, whatever, So he he owes me money because my father passed away. Not the point of the story, okay, But it was a little bit sudden, but we got to be there when he did it. Yes, when he did it, when he decided bye bye. No, but when it happens, you're sort of like caught off guard, unless it's like planned and the person's like just so old. I didn't quite know what to do. Everyone's crying, it's the whole thing. It was like the middle of the night, you know, I decided to pull out my phone and I played an Ed Sharance song. You might ask why, and that is a great question. Yeah, I was like, we got to make sure he's dead. So it was because it had been like this song was on the radio a few times when and some of my last memories with my dad were riding in the car and this song was praying. But we had no ties to the song, right, Like it was just popular at the time. And also so a small part of me was like, we should play something you want to like sort of cut the tension. It was a it was a love song, so it's a it was a weird choice, and I thought, well, for sure, this will be popular for another year and it will go away forever. Right No, acheron, it keeps making music and this song keeps being played at every single fucking wedding. No, it's like the one where it's like I'll be I'll love you until you're seventy, like that one, and it's it's like my dad died so much sooner than seventy. It was like such, I was like trolling my dad and his last breath, being like, hah, not gonna love you when you're seventy. It didn't make it at you. Yeah, so I just have been terrorized. I had Sharon since then. 00:45:50 Speaker 2: Well, you're going to boring people's weddings. It's your fault. But straight people, Yeah, straight people, you've got to stop going to straight weddings. 00:45:57 Speaker 3: I okay, more gay people need to get married. Don't take away all right yet? Okay, not yet. I need to go to more of your weddings, right, But it is. It's just like such a classic song that I think was just popular when we were all becoming young adults. So like maybe these people like kissed to it once or something. I don't know. 00:46:17 Speaker 2: And again to clarify the song is I love you till you're seventy? What's the plan after that? 00:46:23 Speaker 3: That's not the I believe that everybody just dies in his mind at summon dy Oh. 00:46:28 Speaker 2: It's kind of like a Logan's run situation. 00:46:30 Speaker 3: He is trying to be like when you're so old that you can't walk? And I was like, people are walking, babe, but he's like English or something, right. 00:46:38 Speaker 2: Yeah, And again. So he's giving up on you when you can't walk? How is this love? 00:46:47 Speaker 3: I don't know. 00:46:48 Speaker 2: No, I uh. The Ed Sheeran thing is always I've been just absolutely baffled by it is flabbergasting. I guess you have to eat. You needs something. 00:46:56 Speaker 3: Flabber I am flabbergasted. 00:46:58 Speaker 2: Flabbergasting is that something? It could be? Everybody knows what you're talking about. It's their fault that they're not choosing to understand you. 00:47:06 Speaker 3: Yes, thank you for that. 00:47:08 Speaker 2: No, I feel like I guess waiting rooms. 00:47:12 Speaker 3: Yes, we need music for waiting rooms and for when there's like. 00:47:17 Speaker 2: Past apps past apps. Oh interesting, Now I'm already upset with past apps, I know. 00:47:22 Speaker 3: But there's talking over it, right. 00:47:25 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's true. 00:47:26 Speaker 3: So if I get mad when it's like a dance or god forbid, I was a bridesmaid in a wedding. They walked down the aisle to an edge seerance song. 00:47:38 Speaker 2: I tell everybody that you don't like music, and we're gonna do it silently. 00:47:41 Speaker 3: Yeah, what are you doing? But whatever? 00:47:48 Speaker 2: Wait, are there any other musician beefs you have? 00:47:52 Speaker 3: Hmmm, I'll think about it. 00:47:55 Speaker 2: Let's try to alienate you from the. 00:47:56 Speaker 3: Entire music industry. 00:48:00 Speaker 2: I'm sure Ed Sharan's a perfectly nice guy. 00:48:02 Speaker 3: That's he has a bad reputation. I think people came after him because he's a dad and he's always on tour. And I'm like, you, guys, that's the patriarchy. Like, I don't know what to tell you, Like, dads are. 00:48:16 Speaker 2: Gone, right, dads are out of there. 00:48:19 Speaker 3: Dads are gone, And that's a societal problem. It's not just an Ed Sheerant problem. 00:48:24 Speaker 2: Yeah, Ed Sheeran, I feel like we I have bigger problems with Ed scheer other than him being an absentee father. 00:48:30 Speaker 3: Absolutely, how about my ears? No, Ed Sharon, truly, we love you, We love you. I do think like congrats on having a lasting music career, sure, and like being played at weddings. Still, however, I can never listen to your music because of what I did to myself. I will always think of my dad as oh, you know, and I think for that I should be compensated or give me like free tickets to your concert. 00:49:01 Speaker 2: Okay, so now you're creating an issue for yourself. 00:49:04 Speaker 3: I know, I don't. I don't think I could actually like go through the whole concert without crying. 00:49:08 Speaker 2: Oh, I was just going to say, that's just like a ruined Tuesday night. 00:49:12 Speaker 3: Sorry, he's performing on a Tuesday. 00:49:15 Speaker 2: I believe it. Maybe, And again, Ed, we love you and you support your career well. 00:49:21 Speaker 3: And here's the thing. Everyone doesn't have to be for everyone. And I think that people are too sensitive like people. Shit, I'm a woman online. You don't think people absolutely shit. 00:49:30 Speaker 2: Oh, women online are totally fine. You're exaggerating. It's a perfectly nice place for the guy. 00:49:36 Speaker 3: Absolutely. People are constantly commenting on how I look. I'm not like I should get a full face translam. So I'm like, I don't think that my stuff would be for him either. 00:49:46 Speaker 2: Interesting and he's you know, he's going to be petty and he's going to probably like yourself, but then say something bad about it. 00:49:52 Speaker 3: I think he should say something bad about it. But I think if you're a real one, Ed, you would play one of my clips as your father or mother died a little he he haha for the end of their life. 00:50:08 Speaker 2: It's either that or a huge settlement for tat Yeah, exactly. You can choose one. Well, stamps, stamps, this is a valuable thing. There are a few things that people should be giving us gifts like because you know, it's always candle and we've always talked about what a boring thing is. Yeah, that is. But you can always use a candle. But you can also always use triple A batteries. Yes, you can always use stamps, stamps, Kleenex, Kleenex. We're getting into territory where it's a little uh sure, but a seasonal almost. I guess that's a good Christmas gift. 00:50:43 Speaker 3: Like in like a fun little oh, like a like a thing. 00:50:48 Speaker 2: Yeah. 00:50:48 Speaker 3: Yeah, they have like little ones like that have packaging with like shoes on them. 00:50:55 Speaker 2: Right, the shoe cleanex, you get it. Showers, flowers, there are all these kind of pantry staples. 00:51:03 Speaker 3: Well that's why I always hated when people would get me flowers, because certain flowers give me such a terrible headache. 00:51:11 Speaker 2: Oh and alert from allergies. 00:51:13 Speaker 3: Probably, Yeah, just instantly I want to gauge my. 00:51:16 Speaker 2: Eyes out, and just esthetically, you don't. 00:51:19 Speaker 3: I'm like, god, damn it. No, I instantly get like a headache, be based on the smell. And so when you start dating somebody news sometimes they'll give you flowers, which is a nightmare. 00:51:29 Speaker 2: I don't like getting flowers ever. 00:51:31 Speaker 3: I just want toilet paper. 00:51:33 Speaker 2: Truly, when money is spent on flowers, it's something that makes me feel like, oh, I'm not part of humanity that I don't. It does literally nothing for me when someone gives me flowers. Yes, they die just like all this. I know this costs a decent amount of money that could have been spent on other things I could use, absolutely, and I'm just like they look nice enough. I don't know, it's just not really for me. 00:51:53 Speaker 3: I think you have to be having people over consistently to like have fresh cut flowers. 00:51:58 Speaker 2: Right. 00:51:59 Speaker 3: When I go to other people's houses that are adults, they have like decoration, They're like they understood something about life that I'm not there yet. They have like gorgeous plants, and they will typically have at least one vase with like cut flowers, and I am like, wow, this does look like a like this is lovely, this looks like a picture. 00:52:19 Speaker 2: This is like my house. Three months out of a year, I'll have I'll buy flowers, and then those same flowers are there for three months. So for the first week it seems like I'm in control of my life. 00:52:30 Speaker 3: And then you just have something that's like decaying. 00:52:33 Speaker 2: Before you're on old water. Yeah, it's really a tough situation. 00:52:38 Speaker 3: Do you like plants. 00:52:39 Speaker 2: I love plants. I've gotten really good at taking care of my plants. 00:52:42 Speaker 3: Good for you. I haven't gotten there yet, okay. 00:52:44 Speaker 2: I mean what the trick is is you don't take care of. 00:52:47 Speaker 3: Them so not at all. But sometimes they need. 00:52:50 Speaker 2: Water, I mean so rarely. And I also bought a moisture thing that you stick into the dirt and it. 00:52:57 Speaker 3: Tells you, tells you. This is going to be huge for me. 00:53:00 Speaker 2: And it's really like every two weeks very little water because I had killed essentially every plant I owned until now, and I think almost all of mine are still alive, outside of the ones that the dog choose up. 00:53:11 Speaker 3: But that's for the dog. 00:53:14 Speaker 2: Yes, I buy those ones. 00:53:16 Speaker 3: For the dog. 00:53:17 Speaker 2: I want the dog to have a stomach ache on occasion. Yes, Well, I have all these very useful gifts. I've got a new bumper awaiting me, and then I can send out several threatening letters and what a wonderful thing. Oh and I have this sushi that I can do. We'll clip that to something in the studio, I imagine, I don't know. It's beautiful. I think we should play a game. We're going to play a game called Gift or a Curse. I need a number between one and ten from you. 00:53:50 Speaker 3: Let's see five. 00:53:51 Speaker 2: Okay. I have to do some calculating to get our game piece. So right now you can promote, recommend, do whatever you want. 00:53:57 Speaker 3: Okay, amazing. I guess I'll promote my tour, which I don't know any of the dates or the venues. And I'm an excellent businesswoman. I also have a Patreon. It's pretty gay on Patreon, so hop over there subscribe please, we would love to have you. Those are where the full episodes of my show go and then clips are online. But we'll be doing live shows in the Pacific Northwest, and if we sell out, then I get to go other places too. People are so mad that I'm not like going to the East Coast, But that's far away, do you know what I mean? Like, I need to sell this one out and then I get to go there. 00:54:40 Speaker 2: So the end, that's great. Everybody go support Catherine everywhere. 00:54:46 Speaker 3: Yeah, support me everywhere? Thank you? 00:54:48 Speaker 2: Do I have anything to recommend? I started watching The X Files. 00:54:54 Speaker 3: Oh I've never seen it. 00:54:55 Speaker 2: I'm having a great time. I've only watched two episodes, and both seem to be some nobody has it, like a dermatological condition, some sort of skin rash. I don't know if that's the whole show. 00:55:06 Speaker 3: But is this like a house situation where like people have like random illnesses. 00:55:11 Speaker 2: First episode, people have little weird things on their skin. Second episode, somebody's covered in rashes. I don't know what's going on. I don't know if that's just kind of sci fi though, right, yes, but so far sci fi also means that you need to see a dermatom. Yeah. I have to imagine that they're going to branch out from that at some point maybe, but they're probably four hundred episodes and I'm having a great time. 00:55:31 Speaker 4: Do you finally finish Little House on the Prairie. 00:55:33 Speaker 2: No, we're on pause. Gym's out of town, so we're not watching it. Okay, don't shame me. 00:55:41 Speaker 3: How many seasons is Little House on the Prairie? 00:55:43 Speaker 2: That's a lot, Yeah, and. 00:55:45 Speaker 3: That's when they were doing like twenty five twenty. 00:55:48 Speaker 2: I think they're like twenty three or twenty four seasons. So you're free the committing to something. It's I'm having a great time, but my boyfriend's living in New York right now if we watch. 00:55:56 Speaker 3: It together, so it's yeah, you can't do that. 00:55:58 Speaker 2: I'm not going to power through that. 00:55:59 Speaker 3: I got into a with my acts when we were together. They finished a show without me when I was out of town, and that's how I knew that, Like they were mad at me. But then I got on a little plane and somebody died in a little plane that same day, and so then they were back to loving me. That's a true story. 00:56:22 Speaker 2: Thank you people who died on a little plane. You saved do you saved. 00:56:26 Speaker 3: My relationship ship for a little bit. 00:56:31 Speaker 2: Okay, let's play Gift or a Curse. I'm going to name three things. You'll tell me if they are a gift or a curse and why. Okay, then I'll tell you if you're right or wrong, because there are correct answers you can fail. Okay, all right. These are all from our Patreon listeners today. This first one is from Greg. Gift or a Curse Virtual try ons. 00:56:50 Speaker 3: I'm not understanding what that. Oh like when you go and to like a site and they're like try it on, like try it on glasses or whatever. Right, Gosh, this is tough, but I'm gonna say curse. 00:57:02 Speaker 2: Why. 00:57:03 Speaker 3: Well, first of all, you have to upload a picture of your face. Awful, it's never flattering. I also think that it's keeping people out of stores and thus removed from humanity, and I think that's why we get a lot of problems in our society. 00:57:22 Speaker 2: Correct, yay, curse. No Virtual Try on one of the biggest scams that the tech industry has tried to force on us. It never works. 00:57:30 Speaker 3: No, it's always like my glasses are like somehow like this, and I'm like, well, I can't tell of those. 00:57:35 Speaker 2: Yeah, and best case scenario, they don't look like they're on your face. They never It looks like a cheap little image put over your face. Yeah, I'm having to look at my face in a cheap webcam format. I'm having to allow the browser to use the camera extra button I'm. 00:57:51 Speaker 3: Clicking and they can get in then to your data. 00:57:54 Speaker 2: Yeah right, I would rather not see Yeah, of course, that's probably what it's all about. It's just getting more of your face. 00:58:00 Speaker 3: Yeah it is. 00:58:01 Speaker 2: I would rather just even see the product at all. 00:58:03 Speaker 3: No, just ship it to me, Just ship me. 00:58:05 Speaker 2: A surprise, because it'll be better than whatever is put on my face in the virtual Try. On, stop wasting our time. That technology will never work. 00:58:13 Speaker 3: No, and I don't want it to No, I. 00:58:15 Speaker 2: Want to go to the store. I think that's a very good point. I love going to the store. 00:58:19 Speaker 3: You might meet your best friend at the store. 00:58:22 Speaker 2: So many things have happened. 00:58:23 Speaker 3: At the store, or you might just have like a great story for later, even if it's a bad experience. Do you know, right, you're going to become a more interesting person to talk to if you have more human interaction. 00:58:35 Speaker 2: Right, your life will have texture after you go to the store at the mall. Yes, go to the store. Okay, you've gotten one right so far. This next one is from Amy. Gift or a curse spending a lot of money on something you like, but you know you may not wear a lot. 00:58:51 Speaker 3: Oh, you may not wear a lot. That's fine. Yeah, that's a gift because in that question, and it did not say I'm stressed out about money. So in this scenario, I have a lot of money, and then every single time I put that item of clothing on maybe or wear that little purse, I feel like, Oh, I've invested in myself. I don't have the pressure of using it all the time. And I gave myself, like a little treat that is around for longer than like a nice dinner. I don't know. I think it is a gift. 00:59:33 Speaker 2: Wrong curse. No, this stresses me out. Yeah, this is something that does not work for me. This is just something I'm buying, something that will make me feel guilty all day. It's like the telltale heart. It's just always beating in the closet, just always thinking I spent all that money and I'm not using the item. Yeah, what if I done? I've wasted money and I go in the closet every day and feel guilty. 00:59:59 Speaker 3: Yeah, I would say you should have a house gown. I think you need to free yourself up the bounds of like reality and like you can wear anything a lot of the time. 01:00:13 Speaker 2: Why do I need a house gown? 01:00:14 Speaker 3: Because have you ever put on a gown? Okay, have you ever put on a gown and then walked about the house gown? Yeah, and the been like this is my house gown. And then if you live with somebody, they also get the pleasure of seeing you like no makeup, hair a mess, when you're in like this gown and then you're just answering emails. It's very fun. It's very silly. You're giving yourself a gift. You're giving somebody else a gift. 01:00:41 Speaker 2: That psychologically is a green flag. It's absolute green flag. Okay, well, you've gotten one wrong so far. Be very careful with this next. Well this is from Sarah. Yeah, gift or a curse. Flossing your teeth at the communal work lunch table. 01:00:56 Speaker 3: No, what the fuck? What the hell? No? 01:01:01 Speaker 1: Huh? 01:01:01 Speaker 3: Is there no bathroom that? No, get out of here, Sarah. No, we must have standards. No, that is a communal table. There are rules. There are rules to society that matter, and then there are rules that don't matter. Not having bits of already eaten food flicked about at a communal table, that's a rule that matters. I also never want to see a coworker floss. I don't want to see you stick your whole hand in your mouth. What also, I know you're not washing your hand. You're sitting at a table. Huh. And then where does the floss go? And then it's just dangling at the table. Am I supposed to be eating around that? No? No, you could do it in your car. Oh that's yeah, it is. But why do you need like an audience for that, get out of here, so curse, curse? 01:02:00 Speaker 2: Correct? Correct? No, I what are we talking about. You can't do that. 01:02:06 Speaker 3: I don't. 01:02:06 Speaker 2: I don't think you should at work at all. I even think the work bathroom. If you have to floss at work, you should be in the bathroom stall, standing on the toilet. I shouldn't even see your feet, lock the door, floss your teeth, and that's like a once in a lifetime. 01:02:21 Speaker 3: Yeah, I agree, What are you doing? Why do you need that? Unless, of course you are on a twelve hour film set you're having all of your meals there, or I mean a construction site I would imagine also is the same way. And then you have to go to the porta potty, right, a single it's a single stall. Like then you can you can floss, you can come out, you can do your romantic kissine. 01:02:50 Speaker 2: But I don't want to know it after after Philosphy. 01:02:54 Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, you've lost You do nothing else, you know, like I'm ready, baby. 01:03:03 Speaker 2: No, it's a curse. You got two out of three. Yeah, it's pretty good about time too. Oh, actually, Ellis, do you have a gift or a curse? 01:03:11 Speaker 3: I do? 01:03:12 Speaker 2: Ellis is going to do one of these and we both have to answer to it. Then Ellis has the true answer. 01:03:17 Speaker 3: Okay, fun all right? Gift or a curse? 01:03:20 Speaker 4: Your second coffee of the day. 01:03:23 Speaker 3: Well, I'm a psychopath, so to me, that is always a gift, and I don't but I and I also give myself the gift of not having to finish it. But I'm an espresso maker, so I'm not wasting my money on my second coffee, right, Like, so. 01:03:41 Speaker 2: You're paying for the first one. 01:03:43 Speaker 3: Well no, I'm usually making it at home nowadays, but if I'm going out and about, I will buy a coffee and it's always consistently a gift. But I would say if I finish a second coffee, it might be a curse for the people around me. 01:04:04 Speaker 2: I will say, gift too. The second cup of coffee of the day for me is the one that works. Yeah, the first one is just like truly too. 01:04:13 Speaker 3: Do you drink coffee just like coffee or espresso? 01:04:16 Speaker 2: Cold brew? 01:04:17 Speaker 3: Cold brew? Okay, I used to be a cold brew person, but it destroyed my guts. 01:04:21 Speaker 2: Oh interesting, I have that to look forward to. 01:04:23 Speaker 3: Yeah, but I really tried. I tried really hard. I worked at a coffee shop. I was doing sixty four ounces as a cold brew every single wow. 01:04:30 Speaker 2: I used to. I used to do a huge amount every morning, starting at six am. 01:04:34 Speaker 3: Yes, And I would say. People would be like, aren't you cracked out? No, I'm not. I'm probably not medicated for other. 01:04:40 Speaker 2: Things exactly, And I don't. 01:04:42 Speaker 3: I have too many things. I'm silliact now I'm gonna be adhg Absolutely not. But I usually drink four shots of espresso in the morning, so my second cup of coffee or my second coffee will be another double shot. And I just simply don't need six shots of espress, right, But it's always a gift. It's always a gift to have one. 01:05:00 Speaker 2: Yeah, I think it's a gift. I and I will now that I'll have a second cold brew of the day. I don't have to finish it. I'll put in the fridge for another time. 01:05:08 Speaker 3: And I will I also come back, even if it's like a iced cappuccina or something, I put it, I scoop the ice out, I put in the fridge, I drink it tomorrow. 01:05:17 Speaker 2: Absolutely Yeah. 01:05:19 Speaker 3: Okay, were we right? 01:05:21 Speaker 4: So I have a pretty sensitive system. 01:05:24 Speaker 2: We're headed in a bad direction. 01:05:25 Speaker 4: I'm pretty sensitive to caffeine. But here's my thinking is that it still is a gift for me, okay, because it's kind of like a little check in on my nervous system. It's like, oh, I don't I'm on a lot of medication, so I don't get really the opportunity to do a lot of like fun drugs. Yeah, so it's kind of like, all right, like what is this afternoon going to look like? Am I going to be really productive? Or am I going to have a complete crash out at pm and start crying? 01:05:54 Speaker 2: You know. 01:05:55 Speaker 4: So it's just kind of like a little excitement for my day of like what like a little like caffeine roulette, Like what is what is it going to be like today? 01:06:02 Speaker 2: You know, that's a gift. And look at us, we all have kind of different logic and we've all come together on this as a gift. I think that that's really nice. I do too. What a beautiful way to play the game. I think we should answer a listener question people are writing into I said, no gifts at gmail dot com. 01:06:20 Speaker 3: Are we can we address the cigarette? Was this a gift? 01:06:23 Speaker 2: I begged you not to addressed the cigarette? 01:06:26 Speaker 3: Catherine, I said, I wanted to dig myself into a hole. 01:06:30 Speaker 2: I begged you no, the cigarette because it's smoked. That was when we did our Oh it smells in fifth anniversary special. We I was smoking and I guess that's a leftover cigarette from that. It's an herbal cigarette. 01:06:47 Speaker 3: Yeah, it smells nice. 01:06:48 Speaker 2: And that's right, Elice, that's what it's from. 01:06:50 Speaker 4: Yeah, and I just decided to leave it on the table. 01:06:52 Speaker 2: It became a part of the set. Yes, that's one of the rare things on the set. That's not a gift. I think almost everything else here was given, but you know, it's just gives a little bit of a I think it just makes every guest wonder, why is someone going to start smoking in my face? 01:07:06 Speaker 3: Yeah, I would love that. 01:07:08 Speaker 2: And that's a good energy to nothing. I wouldn't either if the host started smoking, I'd just be like, Okay, I'm trapped in a small room inhaling all of their stock. 01:07:16 Speaker 3: Absolutely, I'm committed. 01:07:17 Speaker 2: Yes, all right, let's answer a listener question. This says, Hi, I am writing to you bridge or and guest because my mother's birthday is fast approaching and I have no idea what to get her. She's so hard to buy for because she is a shopaholic and whenever she wants something for herself, she buys it. I would love to get her an experience or something other than a tangible object. She loves the outdoors but isn't athletic. She enjoys binging everything on Netflix and working overtime at her full time accountant job. Please help. And that's from Hannah. Hmm. 01:07:49 Speaker 3: I wonder if she likes plays. Oh and I also wonder if she likes her daughter, because I know she. 01:07:55 Speaker 2: Doesn't like this kid. Yeah, listener to this podcast. 01:07:58 Speaker 3: Okay, all right, that's because I was going to say for my mother, who is also sometimes hard to buy for because she doesn't like tangible objects. She loves an experience and she loves going to the theater, and she likes like carved out time that I put aside for her. 01:08:19 Speaker 2: So it's like outside of touring. 01:08:23 Speaker 3: Yeah, she's like, she's like, so that wasn't a visit, that was just you doing work in town. 01:08:30 Speaker 2: You asked me to come to your show. 01:08:31 Speaker 3: Yeah exactly. But yeah, I would say, like if she's in a city that has like theater or something, but not if it's going to be bad. 01:08:42 Speaker 2: Because that's torture. Yeah, that's unfair. 01:08:44 Speaker 3: Actually, torture. 01:08:45 Speaker 2: That's one of the worst things you can. 01:08:46 Speaker 3: Do a person. I know your friend is talented, Hannah, but don't do that to your mom. But something like that, or like if there's jazz nights at like a local restaurant, it could be like I want to take you to go listen. 01:09:01 Speaker 2: To Joss rock concert, a rock concert. Yeah, Monster truck Rally, live theater, Lucha Libre. Oh, I went to La Libre Mexico City, time of my life. 01:09:16 Speaker 3: I went twice when we were there. 01:09:17 Speaker 2: The thing about it, the power, like being encouraged to boo is the best feeling in the world. 01:09:23 Speaker 3: So fun. 01:09:23 Speaker 2: I love. I'm hooked on booing people. Yes, I might start doing it places at bands I do, like do it here, start. 01:09:30 Speaker 3: Booing community gues sits down, booh see what they do? 01:09:36 Speaker 2: No, I loved. That was one of the highlights of going to Mexico City for me. 01:09:39 Speaker 3: Yeah. 01:09:39 Speaker 2: Same, just loudly yelling at strangers. 01:09:42 Speaker 3: Yes, it's so fun. Or going against the boo and being like, no, I'm rooting for him. 01:09:48 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, the villains on the side of the villains. It feels great. Oh, take your mom to that. Find some level of pro wrestling and take mom to pro wrestling. 01:09:56 Speaker 3: Yeah, it is really fun. 01:09:58 Speaker 2: Yes, I think that that's a perfect to answer. I can't imagine getting your mom anything better. 01:10:03 Speaker 3: No, I'm going to do it right now. 01:10:05 Speaker 2: I'm getting We're on your way to Chicago. 01:10:07 Speaker 3: Yeah, getting our looser libred tickets in Mexico City. You got to get your there yourself, okay, curse. 01:10:17 Speaker 2: Yeah, we answered the question perfectly. I've got all kinds of gifts. Yes, I've had such a lovely time with you. 01:10:23 Speaker 3: I've had a great time. 01:10:25 Speaker 2: Thank you for being here. 01:10:26 Speaker 3: Thank you so much for having me listener. 01:10:29 Speaker 2: The podcast is over. It's time to slowly move into your day. Shit, everything is going to hell for you now, everything is going to You're going off a cliff. This is going to be the worst day of your life. I love it. Good Bye, I said. 01:10:50 Speaker 3: No. 01:10:51 Speaker 2: Gifts is an exactly right production. Our senior producer is Ellis Nelson, and our episodes are beautifully mixed by Ben Holliday. The theme song is by miracle Worker Amy Mann, and we couldn't do it without our booker, Patrick Cottner. You must follow the show on Instagram. At I said, no gifts. That's where you're going to see pictures of all these wonderful gifts I'm getting. And don't you want to see the gifts I invit? 01:11:17 Speaker 3: Did you hear? 01:11:21 Speaker 1: Gonta man? Myself perfectly clear? 01:11:25 Speaker 3: But you're a guest to me. 01:11:29 Speaker 1: You gotta come to me empty, And I said, no gifts. You're our presences, presence enough, and I already had too much stuff. 01:11:43 Speaker 3: So how do you dare to survey me