WEBVTT - Minisode: Thick Skin with Chelsea + Catherine

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<v Speaker 1>Hi, Catherine, Hi Chelsea, how are you Hi.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm just slowly recuperating from my shoulder invasion. Basically my

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<v Speaker 2>day consists of waking up, getting into a hyperbaric chamber

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<v Speaker 2>for two hours, going to physical therapy, and trying to

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<v Speaker 2>do some sort of exercise, then icing my arm about

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<v Speaker 2>fifteen times a day. Do I sound like I'm complaining

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<v Speaker 2>because I am.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean fucking complaining, like shit.

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<v Speaker 3>You know.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, some days I feel really good and then I

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<v Speaker 2>on Saturday, I really overdid it. I was like feeling

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<v Speaker 2>really good. My doctor took out my stitches. I went

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<v Speaker 2>to pete. Then I went for lunch, and then I

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<v Speaker 2>went for a walk, and then I was like, oh,

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<v Speaker 2>I'll go to this dinner party. And then I was

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<v Speaker 2>at this dinner party and like thirty minutes into it,

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<v Speaker 2>I was like I was in pain agony. I'm like, oh, no,

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<v Speaker 2>I fucked something up. But I just overdid it. I

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<v Speaker 2>always overdo it. Yeah, gotta rest, gotta rest.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>And then I have a nice little nurse that comes

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<v Speaker 2>to my house every night and puts gives me an

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<v Speaker 2>injection and infusion for my arm to cut my infection.

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<v Speaker 2>And yeah, it's a lot. It is I feel like

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<v Speaker 2>I'm in a nursing home.

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<v Speaker 1>Your own home is a musing home.

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<v Speaker 4>Now, well, I have a response from one of our episodes,

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<v Speaker 4>and then we have a quick caller.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, great, let's do it. So I just thought this

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<v Speaker 1>was a cute email.

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<v Speaker 4>Margie says, just listening to your show with Hunter McGrady,

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<v Speaker 4>and I think everyone spoke about having a piece of

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<v Speaker 4>pencil lead graphite stuck in their skin.

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<v Speaker 1>Did you have one as well? Now my sister did. Oh,

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<v Speaker 1>Brad definitely does.

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<v Speaker 4>I just so happened to have watched an episode of

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<v Speaker 4>Doctor Pimple Popper and there was a woman on her

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<v Speaker 4>show what a piece of pencil in her hand for

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<v Speaker 4>forty plus years?

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<v Speaker 1>Apparently, I'm guessing it's gone now. It was amazing. Check

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<v Speaker 1>it out. Are you into that stuff like the Doctor

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<v Speaker 1>pimple Popper stuff? I don't like that. I can't watch

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<v Speaker 1>that now I've seen it. I know what you're talking.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, but this was the part I thought was very nice.

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<v Speaker 4>Margie says, keep doing what you're doing. It has changed

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<v Speaker 4>my life perspective about myself and how I relate to

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<v Speaker 4>the world. Listening to you speak truth and strength with

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<v Speaker 4>no apologies about your place on this planet as a

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<v Speaker 4>woman is infectious.

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<v Speaker 1>No more making myself smaller.

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<v Speaker 4>I've always felt that I was actually six feet tall

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<v Speaker 4>and ripped stuck in my petite five foot one inch frame.

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<v Speaker 4>Now I know I am, and I'm gonna love my truth.

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<v Speaker 4>Keep kicking ass, Marquie, Is.

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<v Speaker 1>This what do you mean?

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<v Speaker 2>She got a pencil removed because of our episode?

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<v Speaker 1>Is this what she's talking about?

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<v Speaker 4>No, I think she's just inspired by you, like just

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<v Speaker 4>in general the pencil what there was a bit of

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<v Speaker 4>a shift in there?

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<v Speaker 2>Oh well great, Yes, yes, live out loud.

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<v Speaker 4>Everybody live out loud, and we have some callers.

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<v Speaker 1>That's why we have a couple calling in.

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<v Speaker 4>Oh, a couple that I mess that you met at

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<v Speaker 4>the Chelsea when you were performing at the.

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<v Speaker 2>Cosmo My Vegas residency. Everybody, My next date is March

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<v Speaker 2>twenty first.

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<v Speaker 4>While they're Brad and Leslie, and Leslie is actually the.

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<v Speaker 1>One writing, but both of them will be joining us.

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<v Speaker 4>So she says, Hey, Chelsea, I'm Leslie and my husband

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<v Speaker 4>Brad and I met you recently when you performed at

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<v Speaker 4>the Chelsea in Las Vegas. We got to say high

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<v Speaker 4>after the show. I'm a second generation Plates instructor, meaning

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<v Speaker 4>my teacher studied directly with Joe Plates. I've been teaching

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<v Speaker 4>since two thousand and eight. I started traveling the world

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<v Speaker 4>teaching pilates about the same time that I met my husband.

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<v Speaker 4>A few years later, he convinced me to start online

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<v Speaker 4>pilates Classes dot com we just call it OPC, and

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<v Speaker 4>then join me full time to run the company in

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<v Speaker 4>twenty nineteen. For so many years, OPC was me doing

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<v Speaker 4>my thing. Everything was my responsibility. They were my clients

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<v Speaker 4>and my problems. I've always answered my own dms, done

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<v Speaker 4>my own socials, basically all the marketing, and I still do.

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<v Speaker 4>I've in the face of the company, even as it's

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<v Speaker 4>grown beyond only me doing the teaching. Because I still

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<v Speaker 4>do the marketing, it often feels like I'm on the

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<v Speaker 4>frontline of customer service or on bad days, dealing with

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<v Speaker 4>Internet trolls. I know, you know how that goes. I'm

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<v Speaker 4>really lucky. I love working with my husband. Brad is

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<v Speaker 4>an amazing CEO and has built an incredible team. I'll

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<v Speaker 4>admit that during the first couple of years, going from

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<v Speaker 4>me and my business to we and our business was tricky.

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<v Speaker 4>When something wouldn't go as planned. I tended to default

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<v Speaker 4>to shouldering the burden and not sharing it. It's gotten easier,

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<v Speaker 4>but sometimes I still struggle with this, and I know

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<v Speaker 4>it's frustrating for Brad. How do you lean more on

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<v Speaker 4>your team so that the business issues, obstacles and trolls

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<v Speaker 4>don't feel so personal?

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<v Speaker 1>Leslie and Brad?

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<v Speaker 2>Hi, guys, Hi, Hi did we meet at the Cosmo?

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<v Speaker 1>We did? Mean it the Coso? What a great memory.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh.

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<v Speaker 5>I think I grabbed your butt too long though for selfie,

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<v Speaker 5>But oh that's okay.

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<v Speaker 1>People are always grabbing me.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm not somebody who takes offense to that, but I

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<v Speaker 2>would not recommend grabbing other women's butts.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm made of teflon.

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<v Speaker 2>So are you guys talking about your dynamic?

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<v Speaker 1>This sounds like a you question.

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<v Speaker 2>Catherine, Like you, Katherine, my ex producer has a very

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<v Speaker 2>similar dynamic with her husband.

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<v Speaker 1>He's there.

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<v Speaker 2>He does our sound on our podcast, and she's the

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<v Speaker 2>producer on our podcast. So they work closely together and

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<v Speaker 2>not just on this podcast, on other podcasts.

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<v Speaker 1>Right right.

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<v Speaker 3>I heard he's got a cool name.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah he does. His name is also Brad. I'm not

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<v Speaker 1>going to dignify that with last.

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<v Speaker 4>So I mean, for us, I think it's really about

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<v Speaker 4>division of labor because this was your personal Instagram before

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<v Speaker 4>it was the business Instagram. Correct, yeah, yeah, And it

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<v Speaker 4>was always me as just the person teaching, and then

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<v Speaker 4>several years ago brought other teachers on and we brought

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<v Speaker 4>more team on and.

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<v Speaker 5>It's been amazing and wonderful. And I think the hard

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<v Speaker 5>part is that even when I know that the customer

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<v Speaker 5>service teems amazing, even when I know I can submit this,

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<v Speaker 5>I'm like, here, here's where you go. Just chat to

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<v Speaker 5>them over here, Sometimes it feels like I'm letting people down,

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<v Speaker 5>do you know what I mean? Like, it's not that

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<v Speaker 5>the business is letting them down. I take it personally,

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<v Speaker 5>which is not probably not the healthiest thing right right.

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<v Speaker 4>When you're a business owner, you set up systems for

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<v Speaker 4>yourself so that you can offload a lot of the burden.

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<v Speaker 4>And I think that that maybe is like part of

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<v Speaker 4>what's difficult here. Tell me, Brad, when you read stuff

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<v Speaker 4>that's like, let's say it's from a troll, something nasty,

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<v Speaker 4>when you read stuff that's about Leslie, does that.

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<v Speaker 1>Still feel like a personal attack? Does it get to

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<v Speaker 1>you personally?

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<v Speaker 3>Oh? Sometimes one time we had somebody, particularly you know,

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<v Speaker 3>out there and that was really difficult for everybody, and

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<v Speaker 3>the whole team was also aware of it, and we

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<v Speaker 3>had to make like a team announcement like hey, if

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<v Speaker 3>this person contacts you, But more often than not, it's.

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<v Speaker 1>What did they say? I mean about pilates?

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<v Speaker 5>I know, girl, I mean it's not really about the pilates.

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<v Speaker 5>It's really funny, you know. Uh, we got one in

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<v Speaker 5>last week, which I just laughed at because I had

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<v Speaker 5>a birthday and I decided I have no fs to

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<v Speaker 5>get anymore, Like I'm just gonna go with it. But

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<v Speaker 5>like I wrote an email about like ways to work

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<v Speaker 5>around with one of our social media if you don't

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<v Speaker 5>like what's going on.

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't even get specific.

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<v Speaker 5>And someone's like, so you were with censorship then, and

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<v Speaker 5>I was like, okay, I just told the team. I said,

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<v Speaker 5>we're not even responding, just block and bless, Like.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I really have to like have a little bit

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<v Speaker 2>of a thicker skin in general for life. It doesn't

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<v Speaker 2>do you any good to like actually pay heed to

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<v Speaker 2>any of those comments, regardless of whether they're about you

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<v Speaker 2>personally or about the business. Like you really, it's it's

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<v Speaker 2>kind of like a necessary thing to be able to

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<v Speaker 2>have a thicker skin, not only for you, for your company,

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<v Speaker 2>for the other people that are working with you and

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<v Speaker 2>together with you, to demonstrate to them because you are

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<v Speaker 2>a leader and that requires leadership, and leadership is not

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<v Speaker 2>somebody who's going through their comments and getting upset about it,

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<v Speaker 2>Like that's just not that's not part of the equation.

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<v Speaker 1>You can't.

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<v Speaker 2>You really have to like have a little bit of

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<v Speaker 2>a thicker skin, And can't you just block certain people

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<v Speaker 2>like why are you not doing that?

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah?

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<v Speaker 5>You can, And then they get this particular person just

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<v Speaker 5>got an army together a.

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<v Speaker 3>School community, so it's not like it's not like they

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<v Speaker 3>just disappear. You know, there's still very much connected to

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<v Speaker 3>the rest of the community too, So you know, in

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<v Speaker 3>that kind of case, it was delicate, But I think.

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<v Speaker 5>You I liked the idea of the thicker skin, So

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<v Speaker 5>it's just goes like were you born with a thick skin?

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<v Speaker 5>Like how did you get a thick skin? Because you

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<v Speaker 5>do do things all the time that I'm sure pissed

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<v Speaker 5>a lot of people off, even though I think they're hilarious,

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<v Speaker 5>and you know, like how did you just start to

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<v Speaker 5>go I'm not going to take that on.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, it's a practice, you have to like practice it.

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<v Speaker 2>You're wasting your time on someone's negative energy, So you

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<v Speaker 2>kind of have to look at it like even if

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<v Speaker 2>you're looking at it in a business sense, like this

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<v Speaker 2>does not help us succeed any further, This does not

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<v Speaker 2>help us move the ball any further or closer to

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<v Speaker 2>where we're going. So therefore it's not helpful.

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<v Speaker 1>And treat it.

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<v Speaker 2>As something that is just so such a like a

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<v Speaker 2>business problem, not even a personal thing, you know what

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<v Speaker 2>I mean. Just remove your emotions from from the whole subject.

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<v Speaker 1>Because these people have nothing to do.

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<v Speaker 2>They're sitting at home writing negative comments on people's Instagram.

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<v Speaker 2>I've never once sat and wrote a negative comment on

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<v Speaker 2>anyone's Instagram page because that's not how I spend my time.

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<v Speaker 2>So don't give people who spend their time like that

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<v Speaker 2>any credit or credence or anything. Just like you have

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<v Speaker 2>to practice not giving a shit about what people are

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<v Speaker 2>saying about you, whether it's good or bad, you know

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<v Speaker 2>what I mean.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, Because for example, like when we do these episodes

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<v Speaker 4>like minisodes are regular episodes or whatever, we all have

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<v Speaker 4>some people that I didn't really like that episode, and

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<v Speaker 4>then I'll have ten people emailing and be like that

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<v Speaker 4>episode was life changing. I loved what that person had

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<v Speaker 4>to say. I loved what Chelsea said about XYZ, Like

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<v Speaker 4>you do have to remember that, like just because one

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<v Speaker 4>person is like maybe a crazy person or maybe just

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<v Speaker 4>like if something wasn't for them, Like that's fine. People

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<v Speaker 4>feel like they need to give you feedback, but like

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<v Speaker 4>you don't actually need that.

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<v Speaker 2>And then there's me who pays zero attention to any

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<v Speaker 2>of the feedback that we ever get on the podcast

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<v Speaker 2>at all.

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<v Speaker 1>And we're in our fifth season. So there you go.

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<v Speaker 4>Because you know what you like and you know how

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<v Speaker 4>you want to operate, and you're doing that the way

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<v Speaker 4>you're saying.

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<v Speaker 2>And I'm not just you know, you have to be successful,

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<v Speaker 2>like the podcast has to be successful to go on.

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<v Speaker 2>It doesn't just continue because I'm a celebrity or whatever.

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<v Speaker 2>Like we actually have to get listeners. But I also

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<v Speaker 2>don't ever get consumed with what other people's thoughts like

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<v Speaker 2>And it's a good practice in life, like start practicing

0:09:56.240 --> 0:09:58.920
<v Speaker 2>it in your business and start letting it bleed through

0:09:59.000 --> 0:10:01.840
<v Speaker 2>in your personal life. And it's just there's a sense

0:10:01.880 --> 0:10:06.160
<v Speaker 2>of freedom that people are missing by by paying such

0:10:06.200 --> 0:10:09.760
<v Speaker 2>close attention to other people's think thoughts about them.

0:10:09.800 --> 0:10:12.720
<v Speaker 4>I will also say, like, because you can't ever avoid

0:10:12.800 --> 0:10:15.920
<v Speaker 4>the trolls and the noise completely, Like, yes, you have

0:10:15.920 --> 0:10:18.839
<v Speaker 4>to get a thicker skin, but also maybe there's a

0:10:18.880 --> 0:10:22.200
<v Speaker 4>system that you set up where Brad, if you're affected

0:10:22.240 --> 0:10:24.120
<v Speaker 4>by this stuff, like maybe it's not you, maybe it's

0:10:24.120 --> 0:10:27.400
<v Speaker 4>somebody on your team goes through your inbox before you're

0:10:27.440 --> 0:10:28.960
<v Speaker 4>going through it, and it's like, here are the ones

0:10:28.960 --> 0:10:31.439
<v Speaker 4>that you can respond to personally, I already went through

0:10:31.480 --> 0:10:34.880
<v Speaker 4>and blocked you know, any trolls, any whatever. You're not

0:10:34.880 --> 0:10:36.800
<v Speaker 4>gonna be able to avoid it completely, but like maybe

0:10:36.800 --> 0:10:39.200
<v Speaker 4>there's a system in there where it's just like okay, cool,

0:10:39.240 --> 0:10:40.719
<v Speaker 4>I know, like on the daily I have a team

0:10:40.760 --> 0:10:42.480
<v Speaker 4>member in they're just like getting rid of the trash,

0:10:42.640 --> 0:10:43.800
<v Speaker 4>getting rid of the junk mail.

0:10:44.040 --> 0:10:44.240
<v Speaker 5>You know.

0:10:45.080 --> 0:10:46.000
<v Speaker 1>That's a good idea too.

0:10:46.120 --> 0:10:48.040
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, because you don't have to read mean things about

0:10:48.040 --> 0:10:49.120
<v Speaker 4>yourself if you don't have to.

0:10:49.880 --> 0:10:51.360
<v Speaker 1>No, Yeah, it's really funny.

0:10:51.640 --> 0:10:54.600
<v Speaker 5>We joke that, Like I love my YouTube because the

0:10:54.679 --> 0:10:59.760
<v Speaker 5>comments are either just actual questions or you know, wonderful

0:10:59.760 --> 0:11:02.360
<v Speaker 5>feet back, or just people who are obsessed with like

0:11:02.440 --> 0:11:05.280
<v Speaker 5>my feet or whatever, and so at least it's all complimentary,

0:11:05.400 --> 0:11:07.720
<v Speaker 5>like they're weird, but like I'm good with it and

0:11:07.800 --> 0:11:10.000
<v Speaker 5>so so. But it is interesting, like how on the

0:11:10.040 --> 0:11:12.520
<v Speaker 5>social platforms there it is like there's someone has to

0:11:12.559 --> 0:11:14.800
<v Speaker 5>clean up the trash. And if it's going to distract me,

0:11:15.480 --> 0:11:19.080
<v Speaker 5>then outsourcing that until I can have a thicker skin

0:11:19.320 --> 0:11:21.760
<v Speaker 5>or intel or never come back again because I have

0:11:21.800 --> 0:11:24.360
<v Speaker 5>other things to do. That might be the next step

0:11:24.440 --> 0:11:26.160
<v Speaker 5>so that we can continue to grow because we have

0:11:26.160 --> 0:11:27.440
<v Speaker 5>so much fun doing what we're doing.

0:11:27.760 --> 0:11:31.040
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I think it's really important to remember that. Like

0:11:31.120 --> 0:11:34.959
<v Speaker 4>we used to use our Instagram accounts like a journal,

0:11:35.040 --> 0:11:36.600
<v Speaker 4>you know, it's like what you ate today and like

0:11:36.640 --> 0:11:39.920
<v Speaker 4>what you did last weekend. But especially because you're running

0:11:39.920 --> 0:11:44.120
<v Speaker 4>a business on this specific account, now that's no longer

0:11:44.160 --> 0:11:45.960
<v Speaker 4>what it is. So I think I have to treat

0:11:46.000 --> 0:11:48.600
<v Speaker 4>it like what it is, a business tool, which is

0:11:48.600 --> 0:11:50.880
<v Speaker 4>how you've been using it the last few years. And

0:11:50.920 --> 0:11:53.959
<v Speaker 4>it's time to outsource that twenty dollars an hour work

0:11:54.040 --> 0:11:57.360
<v Speaker 4>of sorting through dms, sending some stuff to you know,

0:11:57.400 --> 0:12:01.160
<v Speaker 4>customer service, deleting the trolls to one of your team

0:12:01.200 --> 0:12:03.560
<v Speaker 4>members so you can free up headspace to focus on

0:12:03.600 --> 0:12:05.600
<v Speaker 4>the big picture of stuff in your business and run

0:12:05.679 --> 0:12:08.160
<v Speaker 4>your business good good, All right?

0:12:08.200 --> 0:12:08.840
<v Speaker 1>Is that helpful?

0:12:09.480 --> 0:12:11.560
<v Speaker 3>Yeah? Absolutely, I think so.

0:12:11.840 --> 0:12:14.480
<v Speaker 2>And just remember the thought like, oh, move forward with

0:12:14.520 --> 0:12:18.079
<v Speaker 2>this thought. I'm a leader, like we're leaders, think about

0:12:18.080 --> 0:12:20.360
<v Speaker 2>the responsibility that that entails.

0:12:21.240 --> 0:12:23.160
<v Speaker 5>Yeah that when that, I think, I'm going to keep

0:12:23.160 --> 0:12:24.040
<v Speaker 5>putting that on replay.

0:12:24.280 --> 0:12:25.120
<v Speaker 1>What would a leader do?

0:12:25.480 --> 0:12:28.160
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, it just gets you out of the actual feeling

0:12:28.240 --> 0:12:29.520
<v Speaker 5>of it and takes you outside of it.

0:12:30.000 --> 0:12:31.040
<v Speaker 1>So I'm so grateful.

0:12:31.080 --> 0:12:31.880
<v Speaker 5>This is really fun.

0:12:32.360 --> 0:12:35.240
<v Speaker 1>This is really I'm I'm so We're thankful.

0:12:34.840 --> 0:12:36.400
<v Speaker 5>And I think this is a way to think about

0:12:36.400 --> 0:12:37.360
<v Speaker 5>things moving forward.

0:12:37.600 --> 0:12:42.199
<v Speaker 1>Great. Thanks for calling in guys. Thank you, they're very sweet. Yeah.

0:12:42.280 --> 0:12:46.120
<v Speaker 4>I think it's like now nowadays, like normal people have

0:12:46.200 --> 0:12:47.560
<v Speaker 4>to deal with this kind of stuff too, Like it

0:12:47.640 --> 0:12:50.800
<v Speaker 4>used to be just relegated to celebrities and even celebrities like, Okay,

0:12:50.800 --> 0:12:52.840
<v Speaker 4>you might get something in the mail that's not very nice,

0:12:52.880 --> 0:12:55.240
<v Speaker 4>but you didn't have this inundation daily of just.

0:12:55.200 --> 0:12:58.080
<v Speaker 2>Like maybe more of the reasons to just completely block

0:12:58.120 --> 0:12:58.480
<v Speaker 2>it out.

0:12:58.559 --> 0:12:59.800
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, what a waste of time.

0:13:00.559 --> 0:13:03.679
<v Speaker 2>Seriously, imagine sitting in front of the mirror and being like,

0:13:03.720 --> 0:13:04.640
<v Speaker 2>you're ugly, You're ugly.

0:13:04.679 --> 0:13:07.360
<v Speaker 1>You're ugly to yourself for fifteen minutes a day. That's

0:13:07.360 --> 0:13:08.600
<v Speaker 1>what it's like reading comments.

0:13:08.760 --> 0:13:13.280
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I've been hearing this phrase around, but that's like, look,

0:13:13.320 --> 0:13:16.480
<v Speaker 4>but don't stare, so it's like, Okay, I can see that.

0:13:16.559 --> 0:13:18.440
<v Speaker 1>I don't need to like take that on my half,

0:13:18.520 --> 0:13:19.440
<v Speaker 1>you know. I like that.

0:13:19.760 --> 0:13:23.040
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, all right, okay minisodes, this is our minisod many

0:13:23.040 --> 0:13:23.600
<v Speaker 2>goodbye to you.

0:13:23.960 --> 0:13:29.000
<v Speaker 4>I