1
00:00:02,480 --> 00:00:05,800
Speaker 1: Guess what decision we're about to make a horrible decisions.

2
00:00:08,520 --> 00:00:13,000
Speaker 1: Welcome guys to get another episode of horrible decisions. Don't

3
00:00:13,039 --> 00:00:15,000
Speaker 1: do this what we have a white person in the

4
00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:20,600
Speaker 1: building yet we don't know. I love doing that. But

5
00:00:20,680 --> 00:00:23,560
Speaker 1: also we also just talked about how actually dope you

6
00:00:23,600 --> 00:00:26,360
Speaker 1: are and not really like everyone else. So we'll get

7
00:00:26,360 --> 00:00:28,440
Speaker 1: into that, but before we do, I'm your girl on

8
00:00:28,520 --> 00:00:31,840
Speaker 1: Mandy v a k A. Pitt the Stallion a k A.

9
00:00:31,880 --> 00:00:35,120
Speaker 1: Pagan Marko a k A. Mandy Baskins a k A. Debt.

10
00:00:35,200 --> 00:00:38,680
Speaker 1: Mandy loves to go with her Peggy. I don't even

11
00:00:38,680 --> 00:00:42,360
Speaker 1: do that anymore. I mean, I'm trying. I'm gonna hold you.

12
00:00:42,640 --> 00:00:44,920
Speaker 1: I've been traveling a lot, and do you know how

13
00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:48,800
Speaker 1: much I've been traveling so much so to where every

14
00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:50,879
Speaker 1: time I don't even take it out. Now my luggage,

15
00:00:51,120 --> 00:00:53,320
Speaker 1: the shrap is there because it's nothing to buy a

16
00:00:53,320 --> 00:00:55,840
Speaker 1: deal dough, but shrust be like eighty to a hundred

17
00:00:55,840 --> 00:00:57,880
Speaker 1: and fifty for the good ones and bye has like

18
00:00:57,920 --> 00:01:01,840
Speaker 1: the bell cro mind just like blinged out. It's not

19
00:01:01,880 --> 00:01:04,320
Speaker 1: blinged out. But the last time that I was in

20
00:01:04,560 --> 00:01:07,400
Speaker 1: l A the guy that I peg and I really

21
00:01:07,480 --> 00:01:10,640
Speaker 1: enjoy pegging I didn't have my strap. He came over.

22
00:01:10,800 --> 00:01:13,600
Speaker 1: He didn't bring the last dildo we bought. It's nothing

23
00:01:13,600 --> 00:01:17,280
Speaker 1: to really purchase a dildo, right, And I was just like, bro,

24
00:01:17,560 --> 00:01:19,920
Speaker 1: I don't have my strap. You could just stay home.

25
00:01:20,120 --> 00:01:22,720
Speaker 1: It was pointless to even see him. So now, because

26
00:01:22,720 --> 00:01:25,360
Speaker 1: I don't want to experience that again, I literally do

27
00:01:25,440 --> 00:01:28,400
Speaker 1: not take the strap out of my luggage. You know

28
00:01:28,800 --> 00:01:30,880
Speaker 1: we got that's a good one. And well, my name

29
00:01:30,880 --> 00:01:32,560
Speaker 1: is Wheezy, and I would say it's the same for me,

30
00:01:32,600 --> 00:01:34,840
Speaker 1: but maybe with my charging pack. I just believe that

31
00:01:36,760 --> 00:01:40,240
Speaker 1: Nina's toys. I'm trying to think though, like you're such

32
00:01:40,280 --> 00:01:44,800
Speaker 1: a mom, not you saying my dog's toys. Instagram stories

33
00:01:44,840 --> 00:01:48,120
Speaker 1: are like all Nina, Hello, Nina on the plane, Nina

34
00:01:48,160 --> 00:01:50,640
Speaker 1: in first class on Delta. That's how I comflex that

35
00:01:50,640 --> 00:01:55,160
Speaker 1: I'm in first class. It's no, it's always Nina in

36
00:01:55,240 --> 00:01:58,160
Speaker 1: front of the Delta one check in. Because here's the thing,

37
00:01:58,920 --> 00:02:01,360
Speaker 1: I feel like, it's not it's very uncouth if you

38
00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:04,000
Speaker 1: post that you're laying down in first I was like, okay,

39
00:02:04,160 --> 00:02:07,120
Speaker 1: I would never be a first class You can't literally

40
00:02:07,200 --> 00:02:09,880
Speaker 1: post that you're in first class like every other day.

41
00:02:09,880 --> 00:02:12,120
Speaker 1: But I do it with the dog. So then people

42
00:02:12,160 --> 00:02:16,079
Speaker 1: are like, just, well, do you know apparently I heard

43
00:02:16,080 --> 00:02:19,440
Speaker 1: that Valentino the designer has like he has a whole

44
00:02:19,520 --> 00:02:23,680
Speaker 1: half of his airplane dogs. How many dogs? Like, apparently

45
00:02:23,720 --> 00:02:26,359
Speaker 1: there's twelve. That's ridiculous. No, they travel in their own

46
00:02:26,560 --> 00:02:31,840
Speaker 1: definitely fucking basketball team. They need their own plane at six. No,

47
00:02:32,040 --> 00:02:35,800
Speaker 1: he has twelve. They travel like not even first class,

48
00:02:35,840 --> 00:02:38,400
Speaker 1: like in their own half of a private plane. They

49
00:02:38,480 --> 00:02:41,000
Speaker 1: travel in their own car. I think they're like getting

50
00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:45,400
Speaker 1: the money there. I gave you all those props like,

51
00:02:45,480 --> 00:02:47,720
Speaker 1: oh yeah, we're definitely, we're definitely trying. They'll put the

52
00:02:47,760 --> 00:02:51,600
Speaker 1: mic to the dog like and what did he do? Um?

53
00:02:51,800 --> 00:02:54,920
Speaker 1: We have a very special guest today who was on

54
00:02:54,919 --> 00:02:57,520
Speaker 1: our show years ago. You just had five years ago.

55
00:02:57,560 --> 00:03:01,000
Speaker 1: Five years ago, Liz Goldwin, I've always called you a

56
00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:03,079
Speaker 1: founder of the sex said, but then I remember you

57
00:03:03,120 --> 00:03:05,240
Speaker 1: were telling me when you were doing prest Fear book.

58
00:03:05,240 --> 00:03:07,440
Speaker 1: You're like, oh my god, please don't say I'm a podcast.

59
00:03:08,840 --> 00:03:11,160
Speaker 1: So what are all the things that you do? Because

60
00:03:11,160 --> 00:03:12,839
Speaker 1: I want to talk about that as to why you're

61
00:03:12,880 --> 00:03:15,359
Speaker 1: so knowledgeable for this book to make a book about this.

62
00:03:15,639 --> 00:03:20,000
Speaker 1: I'm an author, this is my third book. Okay, excuse me,

63
00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:28,000
Speaker 1: it wasn't. It was just so much as Nina. Yeah,

64
00:03:28,840 --> 00:03:31,920
Speaker 1: I've an author. I started out at Planned Parenthood, We're

65
00:03:31,960 --> 00:03:34,320
Speaker 1: going in the clinic when I was thirteen. So I've

66
00:03:34,320 --> 00:03:38,400
Speaker 1: been doing what at answering phones, organizing the media library,

67
00:03:38,720 --> 00:03:43,800
Speaker 1: like playing Solitaire on the computer, telling the protesters seriously,

68
00:03:43,840 --> 00:03:46,160
Speaker 1: they were always calling the clinic with bomb threats. They

69
00:03:46,200 --> 00:03:49,640
Speaker 1: were calling, they were calling. This was back in the day. Yeah,

70
00:03:49,800 --> 00:03:52,480
Speaker 1: this was like pre Google, so you couldn't look up

71
00:03:52,520 --> 00:03:54,680
Speaker 1: like how to give a good blow job or can

72
00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:57,600
Speaker 1: you get pregnant from anal sex? So people would literally

73
00:03:57,640 --> 00:04:01,440
Speaker 1: come in and like check out stuff from our media library,

74
00:04:01,560 --> 00:04:04,360
Speaker 1: which was my job to organize, and they were like pamphlets.

75
00:04:04,880 --> 00:04:08,640
Speaker 1: I remember the pamphlets because they were also very very

76
00:04:08,760 --> 00:04:13,800
Speaker 1: much um in the school nurse office and so literally

77
00:04:13,880 --> 00:04:16,520
Speaker 1: even how to put on a condom. There were pamphlets

78
00:04:16,520 --> 00:04:18,680
Speaker 1: for everything sex. You would have to go to the

79
00:04:18,760 --> 00:04:21,080
Speaker 1: nurse's office. But it was only like how to put

80
00:04:21,080 --> 00:04:23,719
Speaker 1: on a condom. Don't get like if you have sex,

81
00:04:23,880 --> 00:04:27,880
Speaker 1: you'll get pregnant or you'll get and die. It was

82
00:04:27,960 --> 00:04:30,599
Speaker 1: like there was no there was nothing like there is

83
00:04:30,640 --> 00:04:33,040
Speaker 1: no scare you to have sex or did it make

84
00:04:33,080 --> 00:04:35,039
Speaker 1: you feel like now I know, Now I have the tools,

85
00:04:35,040 --> 00:04:36,960
Speaker 1: so I can go fun. You know what, when I

86
00:04:37,000 --> 00:04:39,960
Speaker 1: was that age, I was like answering questions at school

87
00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:42,200
Speaker 1: that were like way beyond my skill set. I talked

88
00:04:42,200 --> 00:04:44,080
Speaker 1: about it this in the book, because kids would ask

89
00:04:44,120 --> 00:04:47,560
Speaker 1: me at recess questions about sex because I worked at

90
00:04:47,560 --> 00:04:50,960
Speaker 1: Planned Parenthood and they and I would always be like, oh,

91
00:04:51,040 --> 00:04:53,800
Speaker 1: if you have a yearinary tract infection, drink cranberry juice.

92
00:04:54,160 --> 00:04:57,000
Speaker 1: And that also helped you beat a drug test if

93
00:04:57,000 --> 00:05:00,440
Speaker 1: you're being tested for marijuana. That's true. The's no way

94
00:05:00,480 --> 00:05:03,120
Speaker 1: that's now they now they tout your blood. Now they

95
00:05:03,120 --> 00:05:06,400
Speaker 1: touch your blood. They still make you pe okay, well

96
00:05:07,040 --> 00:05:09,760
Speaker 1: cranberry like, but the cranberry did you tell them it

97
00:05:09,800 --> 00:05:12,000
Speaker 1: had to be the concentrate, not the ocean spray because

98
00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:16,039
Speaker 1: the sugar. Yeah, you don't want ocean spray, you want like, really,

99
00:05:16,120 --> 00:05:18,240
Speaker 1: you can take the cranberry pills. Actually, I think that

100
00:05:18,320 --> 00:05:21,479
Speaker 1: everyone if you're having a lot of sex, pro tip,

101
00:05:21,960 --> 00:05:23,840
Speaker 1: that's a good thing to always travel with. I hold

102
00:05:23,880 --> 00:05:28,880
Speaker 1: you take them daily. Yeah you're taking but no, I'm

103
00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:30,960
Speaker 1: just saying like you should always have it on hands

104
00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:33,960
Speaker 1: because I've been caught in an emergency situation, like in

105
00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:36,440
Speaker 1: a foreign country where it's hard to get cranberry and

106
00:05:36,960 --> 00:05:39,599
Speaker 1: but that, but outside of that, when you have sex,

107
00:05:39,880 --> 00:05:43,360
Speaker 1: like there's been times where I know I just got

108
00:05:43,760 --> 00:05:47,120
Speaker 1: the ship out of right and I'm tired, but I

109
00:05:47,120 --> 00:05:50,440
Speaker 1: also know I should go to go go piss. You gotta,

110
00:05:50,520 --> 00:05:53,320
Speaker 1: but I ain't got a pee and half got a point,

111
00:05:53,360 --> 00:05:55,480
Speaker 1: So I'm like, I'm gonna take a cranberry pill in

112
00:05:55,480 --> 00:06:00,960
Speaker 1: the moment. But that's where like you, But what if

113
00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:04,120
Speaker 1: I go three rounds? Sometimes me and my man go five,

114
00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:06,520
Speaker 1: I don't and I'll try to piss, but towards the end,

115
00:06:06,600 --> 00:06:09,159
Speaker 1: like I don't already pissed twice, we don't win another

116
00:06:09,279 --> 00:06:10,600
Speaker 1: round and now I'm just gonna go to sleep. You

117
00:06:10,640 --> 00:06:14,080
Speaker 1: just put that sippy cup next to the bed. I

118
00:06:14,200 --> 00:06:17,200
Speaker 1: don't think a cup I would get up. The bathroom

119
00:06:17,240 --> 00:06:20,599
Speaker 1: is right in so many cups. I don't know why,

120
00:06:20,839 --> 00:06:23,360
Speaker 1: why are you being cups? I'm trying to the bathroom. Oh,

121
00:06:23,360 --> 00:06:24,960
Speaker 1: I know, the last time I did this is crazy.

122
00:06:24,960 --> 00:06:29,600
Speaker 1: I can't even want to say this. So I don't

123
00:06:29,600 --> 00:06:33,760
Speaker 1: have bathrooms in my bedrooms in New York and I

124
00:06:33,800 --> 00:06:35,279
Speaker 1: had a friend of mine who was on the couch

125
00:06:35,320 --> 00:06:38,120
Speaker 1: with this guy. And this was pandemic time when I

126
00:06:38,160 --> 00:06:40,279
Speaker 1: was like the afties. I was the spot during the

127
00:06:40,279 --> 00:06:43,200
Speaker 1: pandemic to hang and so I had if he really bad,

128
00:06:43,240 --> 00:06:45,000
Speaker 1: but I didn't want to break their stride because I

129
00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:46,599
Speaker 1: could hear them about to funk, and I was like

130
00:06:46,640 --> 00:06:48,440
Speaker 1: looking around and remember, like, what am I gonna do?

131
00:06:48,720 --> 00:06:50,760
Speaker 1: So I just drank the rest of my drink, which

132
00:06:50,760 --> 00:06:52,800
Speaker 1: made me even more drunk, and I beat in the

133
00:06:52,839 --> 00:06:56,000
Speaker 1: cup and I remember being so embarrassed to be in

134
00:06:56,000 --> 00:06:59,640
Speaker 1: the cup in your own crew is crazy, and I was.

135
00:07:00,120 --> 00:07:03,760
Speaker 1: I was crazy. It was high. It's like, damn, I'm

136
00:07:03,760 --> 00:07:05,599
Speaker 1: gonna have to end up having it if I get

137
00:07:05,600 --> 00:07:07,920
Speaker 1: out there. Like, I don't know what to do. So

138
00:07:08,080 --> 00:07:09,880
Speaker 1: I just beat in the cup. But I remember in

139
00:07:09,920 --> 00:07:11,600
Speaker 1: the morning when I woke up, I saw the PI

140
00:07:11,680 --> 00:07:13,400
Speaker 1: and I was like, now I gotta bring it out.

141
00:07:13,400 --> 00:07:15,280
Speaker 1: And everybody's sleeping in my living I was gonna see

142
00:07:15,320 --> 00:07:18,960
Speaker 1: me holding this cup. It was off. Okay, anyway about

143
00:07:19,240 --> 00:07:21,920
Speaker 1: planned parenthood, what else? We're still going down your resume?

144
00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:24,080
Speaker 1: But who were talking about the corn hunk thing you

145
00:07:24,160 --> 00:07:26,920
Speaker 1: just did? Yeah, well, that's like flash forward a number

146
00:07:27,000 --> 00:07:31,560
Speaker 1: of years. Okay, you want me to go, let's okay.

147
00:07:31,600 --> 00:07:34,800
Speaker 1: So at planned parenthood and then when I was moved

148
00:07:34,840 --> 00:07:36,800
Speaker 1: to New York when I was like sixteen, and I

149
00:07:36,840 --> 00:07:40,760
Speaker 1: started um collecting burlesque costumes that I would get at

150
00:07:40,760 --> 00:07:43,880
Speaker 1: the flea market, and I ended up writing a book

151
00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:45,720
Speaker 1: and my first book and making a movie that I

152
00:07:45,760 --> 00:07:48,600
Speaker 1: sold to HBO called Pretty Things about the last generation

153
00:07:48,600 --> 00:07:51,400
Speaker 1: of American burlesque queens and the advent of strippers and

154
00:07:51,440 --> 00:07:54,160
Speaker 1: all these people. Especially because I do come from like

155
00:07:54,200 --> 00:07:56,200
Speaker 1: a Hollywood family. They were like, why do you care

156
00:07:56,200 --> 00:07:59,000
Speaker 1: about these dead strippers? No one's going to care about this.

157
00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:01,200
Speaker 1: This was pre like Sea Cat Dolls, by the way,

158
00:08:02,200 --> 00:08:08,800
Speaker 1: pre Christina Aguiley. No post Coyote Coyote Ugly wasn't really

159
00:08:08,840 --> 00:08:15,920
Speaker 1: like it doesn't really like Lady Marmalade. Year did that

160
00:08:15,960 --> 00:08:24,120
Speaker 1: come out? I don't know where years that came out? Yeah, yeah, yeah,

161
00:08:24,480 --> 00:08:27,040
Speaker 1: you don't know the year. You know, I don't know

162
00:08:27,080 --> 00:08:30,120
Speaker 1: you're the year because because I feel like it became

163
00:08:30,280 --> 00:08:33,520
Speaker 1: mainstream when it came out there. So this year was

164
00:08:33,520 --> 00:08:36,000
Speaker 1: two thousand one, okay, so that was after Mine came

165
00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:38,680
Speaker 1: out two thousand five. The first movie and the book

166
00:08:38,679 --> 00:08:41,959
Speaker 1: came out two thousand five. I was like photographing myself

167
00:08:42,040 --> 00:08:45,880
Speaker 1: in these burlesque costumes and then like learning about burlesque

168
00:08:45,880 --> 00:08:48,160
Speaker 1: and sex from these eight year old women who had

169
00:08:48,200 --> 00:08:51,240
Speaker 1: been stars of the nineteen thirties and forties. And at

170
00:08:51,280 --> 00:08:54,640
Speaker 1: the time I was like a young married woman literally

171
00:08:54,679 --> 00:08:58,480
Speaker 1: having my like sexual like awakening through these like eighty

172
00:08:58,559 --> 00:09:01,840
Speaker 1: year old women. It was pretty wild actually because I

173
00:09:01,880 --> 00:09:04,599
Speaker 1: was like kind of like a nineteen fifties housewife, Like

174
00:09:05,120 --> 00:09:11,120
Speaker 1: nineteen fifties, this is nineteen fifties, but they wouldn't let

175
00:09:11,120 --> 00:09:13,640
Speaker 1: you wear the leather's cart back then. Well, oh mabe,

176
00:09:13,760 --> 00:09:17,120
Speaker 1: I was a bad girl. I had for my wet

177
00:09:17,160 --> 00:09:20,280
Speaker 1: for my honeymoon, I went to trashy Laingree in l A.

178
00:09:20,480 --> 00:09:23,920
Speaker 1: And I had like housewife outfits made like he knows.

179
00:09:23,960 --> 00:09:25,960
Speaker 1: Like that was like my role play was that I

180
00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:28,800
Speaker 1: was just really yeah because I was a terrible housewife actually,

181
00:09:28,800 --> 00:09:31,600
Speaker 1: like I didn't know how to cook. I was really

182
00:09:31,600 --> 00:09:34,720
Speaker 1: into like making the bed. No, actually didn't make the bed.

183
00:09:34,960 --> 00:09:36,760
Speaker 1: I didn't make the bed. You were a housewife and

184
00:09:36,760 --> 00:09:39,400
Speaker 1: no housewife skills. I was like eighteen when I had

185
00:09:39,400 --> 00:09:43,040
Speaker 1: I could suck a dick all right. I was, God,

186
00:09:43,240 --> 00:09:46,480
Speaker 1: what I mean, would you rather have a girl that

187
00:09:46,559 --> 00:09:49,120
Speaker 1: goes to trashy lingerie and has like a full like

188
00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:52,520
Speaker 1: pretend housewife like little maid. It was like a maid's uniform. Also,

189
00:09:52,600 --> 00:09:55,160
Speaker 1: I love that you can actually live into Like I

190
00:09:55,200 --> 00:09:58,560
Speaker 1: didn't clean this right beat yet, let me push the

191
00:09:58,679 --> 00:10:03,760
Speaker 1: vacuum in one spot for an actor not imagine you're

192
00:10:03,760 --> 00:10:06,800
Speaker 1: doing role play? Well, I mean, I feel like it's

193
00:10:06,840 --> 00:10:09,680
Speaker 1: kind of funny. It is. I'm too goofy. I ain't

194
00:10:09,679 --> 00:10:11,640
Speaker 1: gonna hold you. Y'all ain't get to see it on camera.

195
00:10:12,040 --> 00:10:15,600
Speaker 1: She lifted the whole leg. He showed up the bottom

196
00:10:15,640 --> 00:10:19,000
Speaker 1: of her Look, I can. I sensed role play as

197
00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:23,400
Speaker 1: soon as you were, like you don't like in your

198
00:10:23,400 --> 00:10:25,600
Speaker 1: head that I'm trying to imagine him asking you a

199
00:10:25,679 --> 00:10:28,280
Speaker 1: question in the middle of role play that you can't answer.

200
00:10:28,600 --> 00:10:31,840
Speaker 1: That's my greatest like beer with role play, Like what

201
00:10:31,920 --> 00:10:36,400
Speaker 1: if I can't finish? Like we're having Kicky Palmer on right,

202
00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:38,480
Speaker 1: and we did a little role play with her and

203
00:10:38,520 --> 00:10:41,160
Speaker 1: like I was like, fuck, she's she's just too quick.

204
00:10:41,200 --> 00:10:43,840
Speaker 1: It felt like improv. And then I was stuck. Yeah,

205
00:10:43,880 --> 00:10:45,640
Speaker 1: I'm not like, don't put me in the role play.

206
00:10:45,720 --> 00:10:49,120
Speaker 1: Mistress category and be quiet and bend over in your outfit.

207
00:10:49,440 --> 00:10:51,640
Speaker 1: Well that's what I want to do. Yeah, sometimes I

208
00:10:51,640 --> 00:10:54,000
Speaker 1: don't want to do no talking, no narrative. It's given.

209
00:10:54,040 --> 00:10:57,560
Speaker 1: Let's play music in the background, the movie silent movie

210
00:10:57,600 --> 00:11:01,280
Speaker 1: happening here. So you created this book that then turned

211
00:11:01,280 --> 00:11:04,440
Speaker 1: into a film and where the Home came out first,

212
00:11:04,480 --> 00:11:07,240
Speaker 1: and then the book came out and called pretty Things

213
00:11:07,520 --> 00:11:10,040
Speaker 1: the last generation American blast Queens. And then while I

214
00:11:10,120 --> 00:11:13,600
Speaker 1: was researching that, I was always really fascinated with sex workers,

215
00:11:13,640 --> 00:11:15,880
Speaker 1: Like from the time I was a kid. Yeah, like

216
00:11:16,040 --> 00:11:19,280
Speaker 1: always obsessed thinking about if I was born in another

217
00:11:19,320 --> 00:11:21,400
Speaker 1: time period, what would be my choice is as a woman,

218
00:11:22,160 --> 00:11:25,880
Speaker 1: because no matter what, having a volva would like dictate

219
00:11:26,120 --> 00:11:28,840
Speaker 1: what I was allowed to do. Right, Yes, so no, girl,

220
00:11:28,840 --> 00:11:32,439
Speaker 1: I was born in the nineties and still chosen. I'm

221
00:11:32,440 --> 00:11:35,600
Speaker 1: talking about if you're born hundred two hundred, five hundred

222
00:11:35,679 --> 00:11:38,520
Speaker 1: years ago. Now, we always talked about prostitution being also

223
00:11:38,760 --> 00:11:44,360
Speaker 1: the oldest, the oldest oldest work his job, and so

224
00:11:44,640 --> 00:11:47,960
Speaker 1: like I was just always fascinated with like also curious.

225
00:11:48,040 --> 00:11:53,320
Speaker 1: Wide society condemned women for often back then like taking

226
00:11:53,320 --> 00:11:56,240
Speaker 1: one of the few choices available to them, and I

227
00:11:56,280 --> 00:11:58,560
Speaker 1: didn't feel like they should be shamed for that. The

228
00:11:58,600 --> 00:12:00,839
Speaker 1: same way that I looked at Blast was like these

229
00:12:00,880 --> 00:12:04,359
Speaker 1: women were performing artists and they had like incredible costumes

230
00:12:04,360 --> 00:12:07,840
Speaker 1: and choreography and music, and they really worked on their routine.

231
00:12:07,880 --> 00:12:09,880
Speaker 1: They spent ton of money on their costumes to like

232
00:12:10,120 --> 00:12:14,679
Speaker 1: three grand back then, like in that's a lot of money,

233
00:12:14,360 --> 00:12:17,360
Speaker 1: My home girls a lot of money, Medina. They just

234
00:12:17,360 --> 00:12:19,959
Speaker 1: did a burlesque show in the in Chicago and it's

235
00:12:20,080 --> 00:12:23,280
Speaker 1: it was home burlesque theme. She had a beautiful like

236
00:12:23,320 --> 00:12:25,840
Speaker 1: a velvet skirt with a core set up, and she

237
00:12:25,960 --> 00:12:30,120
Speaker 1: paid almost three her costume and it's one of those

238
00:12:30,160 --> 00:12:32,520
Speaker 1: like you keep it by but she's like, where am

239
00:12:32,520 --> 00:12:34,439
Speaker 1: I going to wear this again? Too? But that's that's

240
00:12:34,600 --> 00:12:37,200
Speaker 1: that's on the cheap end. And it was still like

241
00:12:37,480 --> 00:12:40,640
Speaker 1: three hundred dollars. Yeah, min, you titties are out. It's

242
00:12:40,679 --> 00:12:46,320
Speaker 1: literally from here down out like the whole. To me,

243
00:12:46,360 --> 00:12:50,400
Speaker 1: it's like girls half a dress, that's you know what

244
00:12:50,480 --> 00:12:54,240
Speaker 1: I mean? So you just didn't like the shame that

245
00:12:54,360 --> 00:12:56,480
Speaker 1: was I didn't put onto sex workers. I don't like

246
00:12:56,559 --> 00:12:59,559
Speaker 1: shame put onto sex period. I don't like shame put

247
00:12:59,559 --> 00:13:02,400
Speaker 1: onto women in I don't like shame put onto anyone. Um,

248
00:13:02,520 --> 00:13:05,320
Speaker 1: I think we live in a culture of shame. So yeah,

249
00:13:05,440 --> 00:13:07,840
Speaker 1: like that was my So my second book, which was

250
00:13:07,880 --> 00:13:11,720
Speaker 1: the last one came out, was historical fiction about vice

251
00:13:11,800 --> 00:13:14,000
Speaker 1: and sex work in l A in the eighteen nineties.

252
00:13:14,679 --> 00:13:18,280
Speaker 1: What's it called Sporting Guide? Yeah, because it actually it

253
00:13:18,320 --> 00:13:21,439
Speaker 1: was legal in certain areas back then, including in Los

254
00:13:21,480 --> 00:13:23,920
Speaker 1: Angeles and on the old real maps of l A.

255
00:13:24,120 --> 00:13:26,719
Speaker 1: It says how Seville fame. Well, that's also why a

256
00:13:26,800 --> 00:13:29,079
Speaker 1: lot of the porn is still shot in like the

257
00:13:29,200 --> 00:13:31,000
Speaker 1: valley in certain areas in l A. Right, this is

258
00:13:31,040 --> 00:13:41,920
Speaker 1: way pre porn, eighteen nineties, prere radio. How how did

259
00:13:41,920 --> 00:13:48,400
Speaker 1: you find that in this part in l A? Like? How?

260
00:13:48,840 --> 00:13:50,960
Speaker 1: Because I'm a nerd? This is what I get off

261
00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:57,959
Speaker 1: on all of my my I guess. Like literally, I'm

262
00:13:57,960 --> 00:14:01,199
Speaker 1: in the library, like looking up night graffiche records, like

263
00:14:01,240 --> 00:14:07,040
Speaker 1: adjusting my glasses. Micro Yeah, see I'm a nerd, Like

264
00:14:07,280 --> 00:14:09,840
Speaker 1: I don't know big words and microfiche is like it's

265
00:14:09,840 --> 00:14:13,160
Speaker 1: like film records, like records that are on film basically

266
00:14:13,440 --> 00:14:16,160
Speaker 1: and you have to like roll through them, you know.

267
00:14:16,440 --> 00:14:19,240
Speaker 1: I love like a card catalog, Like give me a

268
00:14:19,280 --> 00:14:23,080
Speaker 1: fucking card catalog, the Dewey doscimal system. I love a library,

269
00:14:23,160 --> 00:14:25,280
Speaker 1: like I'm just I'm a nerd that likes to get

270
00:14:25,280 --> 00:14:28,480
Speaker 1: lost in research, whether that's like first person research, like

271
00:14:28,520 --> 00:14:31,160
Speaker 1: I love talking to anyone and hearing their stories, or

272
00:14:31,320 --> 00:14:35,480
Speaker 1: like being like I wonder what happened in eighteen seventy four?

273
00:14:35,800 --> 00:14:38,400
Speaker 1: You know what's about a lot of girls like to

274
00:14:38,440 --> 00:14:40,280
Speaker 1: say they're a nerd, like you know what I mean

275
00:14:40,320 --> 00:14:42,920
Speaker 1: on their like dating profiles. I'm so I'm such a nerd,

276
00:14:43,440 --> 00:14:47,960
Speaker 1: but like you are. Yeah, no, I know when you

277
00:14:48,280 --> 00:14:51,080
Speaker 1: when you wrote I'm a nerd who can also recite

278
00:14:51,200 --> 00:14:54,360
Speaker 1: most of the lyrics to two Lives. Two Lives grows

279
00:14:54,640 --> 00:14:59,840
Speaker 1: because as you do, Wait, do I have an all?

280
00:15:03,400 --> 00:15:05,960
Speaker 1: You fit the guy's bread there? You show me a guy.

281
00:15:06,120 --> 00:15:08,320
Speaker 1: I don't know what he's gonna look like, Like I

282
00:15:08,480 --> 00:15:10,280
Speaker 1: don't have a type, but you don't have a type

283
00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:14,560
Speaker 1: at all. I don't have a type like and I like,

284
00:15:14,640 --> 00:15:18,320
Speaker 1: there's nothing she has a type. She has a type

285
00:15:18,400 --> 00:15:21,480
Speaker 1: like alternative to look poor. We talked about this all

286
00:15:21,520 --> 00:15:25,720
Speaker 1: the time, and then this bitch. Everyone all of my

287
00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:28,360
Speaker 1: friends have met, Like there's a few people that are

288
00:15:28,360 --> 00:15:31,560
Speaker 1: around and they're like they all look like cousins. Apparently,

289
00:15:31,640 --> 00:15:34,160
Speaker 1: even though they're all black, they're like, nope, they all

290
00:15:34,200 --> 00:15:36,920
Speaker 1: like Middle Eastern or Dominican or like they could be

291
00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:42,600
Speaker 1: in their Arabian sea somewhere like the Arabians. They're just Muslim,

292
00:15:42,800 --> 00:15:46,440
Speaker 1: like from a Harlem. What do you want from me?

293
00:15:46,840 --> 00:15:49,560
Speaker 1: That is the type? Then? First off, I can't help

294
00:15:49,600 --> 00:15:51,440
Speaker 1: the nigga from Harlem like me. You know what I mean,

295
00:15:52,200 --> 00:15:55,360
Speaker 1: specifically do beginning? I mean, I don't know why. That's

296
00:15:55,360 --> 00:15:58,040
Speaker 1: why the Halloween I dressed up as a bacon and said,

297
00:15:58,080 --> 00:16:03,160
Speaker 1: this is the only right here. Baby. Yeah, no, no,

298
00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:06,160
Speaker 1: I have no type. You couldn't like categorize if you

299
00:16:06,240 --> 00:16:09,880
Speaker 1: like women as well. I'm definitely attracted to women, but

300
00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:14,920
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm pretty heteronormative. Yeah. But that said,

301
00:16:15,240 --> 00:16:17,640
Speaker 1: I feel like in my sixties, I'm gonna get into

302
00:16:17,760 --> 00:16:20,520
Speaker 1: some throuble ship. Why do you say, I don't know,

303
00:16:20,680 --> 00:16:22,680
Speaker 1: because I just feel like that's when I'm gonna get

304
00:16:22,760 --> 00:16:25,800
Speaker 1: really wild. That's when are you keeping yourself from being

305
00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:28,840
Speaker 1: wild right now? Because you're the author? Oh no, not

306
00:16:29,240 --> 00:16:32,240
Speaker 1: not at all, not at all. I wonder like I

307
00:16:32,400 --> 00:16:34,840
Speaker 1: just like I don't want to. I feel like a

308
00:16:34,920 --> 00:16:37,000
Speaker 1: lot of times people think you stop having sex at

309
00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:39,320
Speaker 1: a certain age or like life is an adventurous and

310
00:16:39,400 --> 00:16:41,880
Speaker 1: I don't think we should live like that. I want

311
00:16:41,920 --> 00:16:45,600
Speaker 1: to be having I feel like I'm having way better

312
00:16:45,720 --> 00:16:47,840
Speaker 1: sex now than I did when I was like in

313
00:16:47,920 --> 00:16:50,040
Speaker 1: my twenties. Same and I'm the only in my thirties

314
00:16:50,080 --> 00:16:52,360
Speaker 1: and I'm like, it's way better than my twenties. Yeah,

315
00:16:52,480 --> 00:16:54,480
Speaker 1: Like I'm like, it's getting better. I know more of

316
00:16:54,560 --> 00:16:56,680
Speaker 1: what I want. And it's funny that you say that too,

317
00:16:56,760 --> 00:16:59,200
Speaker 1: because we went to hedonism a couple of years ago.

318
00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:02,520
Speaker 1: I remember when you guys want the amount of couples

319
00:17:02,560 --> 00:17:06,560
Speaker 1: though that were like, hey, we've been here fifteen times,

320
00:17:06,600 --> 00:17:08,560
Speaker 1: we've been here twenty five times, and they were all

321
00:17:08,680 --> 00:17:11,240
Speaker 1: well into their at least the white people that were there.

322
00:17:11,359 --> 00:17:13,080
Speaker 1: There was a black party that was there as well,

323
00:17:13,160 --> 00:17:15,159
Speaker 1: but all of the white people that were there were

324
00:17:15,240 --> 00:17:19,119
Speaker 1: literally like well into their fifties. I would say a

325
00:17:19,240 --> 00:17:21,080
Speaker 1: couple of wives and they were like, we've been doing this,

326
00:17:21,240 --> 00:17:23,200
Speaker 1: and they you could sound like they love it. I

327
00:17:23,359 --> 00:17:27,520
Speaker 1: was just explaining barstools on a podcast. What senior suck

328
00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:30,800
Speaker 1: like Senior the senior sex porn genre. No, and Girl

329
00:17:30,880 --> 00:17:33,280
Speaker 1: in the Corner just made the face that you did. Like,

330
00:17:33,480 --> 00:17:37,200
Speaker 1: what's senior sex. I've watched it just for like research

331
00:17:37,320 --> 00:17:44,480
Speaker 1: and the only thing I don't want to sound like

332
00:17:44,520 --> 00:17:47,200
Speaker 1: an ages but like I can watch old guy, young girl.

333
00:17:47,280 --> 00:17:49,400
Speaker 1: But sometimes watching older women makes me think of my mom.

334
00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:52,119
Speaker 1: But when I was, it really does. I just I

335
00:17:52,200 --> 00:17:54,160
Speaker 1: can't explain it makes me think, Okay, well, what about

336
00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:56,000
Speaker 1: the fact that we're all gonna look like that one

337
00:17:56,080 --> 00:18:00,200
Speaker 1: day just gonna be out. You're gonna just piece out

338
00:18:00,280 --> 00:18:02,199
Speaker 1: after a certain age and not have sex. We all

339
00:18:02,240 --> 00:18:04,280
Speaker 1: looked like children at one point as well. That doesn't

340
00:18:04,280 --> 00:18:11,560
Speaker 1: mean I'm going to like porn like you. You just

341
00:18:12,560 --> 00:18:15,280
Speaker 1: look like even the same like to me then with

342
00:18:15,840 --> 00:18:19,480
Speaker 1: say the and and we were talking with h Cinnamon

343
00:18:19,520 --> 00:18:23,320
Speaker 1: Love about this. Um there's even still this very popular

344
00:18:23,400 --> 00:18:26,879
Speaker 1: genre not bringing it to kids, but barely legal, and

345
00:18:27,080 --> 00:18:30,399
Speaker 1: I still watched gay porn. I don't like twink categories

346
00:18:30,840 --> 00:18:34,560
Speaker 1: like I don't like males not looking like men. I

347
00:18:34,640 --> 00:18:37,800
Speaker 1: don't like the very small bodied men or men that

348
00:18:37,960 --> 00:18:40,200
Speaker 1: just look like they just got out of high school.

349
00:18:40,480 --> 00:18:43,720
Speaker 1: So even like the barely legal category, even though yeah,

350
00:18:43,800 --> 00:18:46,159
Speaker 1: we've all been eighteen nineteen twenty, we've been since we

351
00:18:46,240 --> 00:18:48,359
Speaker 1: were sixteen, you know, but I still don't want to

352
00:18:48,359 --> 00:18:50,680
Speaker 1: see the barely legal category either, or the twinks in

353
00:18:50,720 --> 00:18:54,880
Speaker 1: gay porn. Yah, I want to At first they used

354
00:18:54,880 --> 00:18:56,840
Speaker 1: to think it was the young young face, and then

355
00:18:56,920 --> 00:19:00,600
Speaker 1: I started to like understand, Oh, it's just like this

356
00:19:00,760 --> 00:19:04,919
Speaker 1: innocent thing. It's the outfit. Sometimes it's even the cardigan, right,

357
00:19:06,680 --> 00:19:10,040
Speaker 1: that's it. Yeah, if that's what it is, that and

358
00:19:11,880 --> 00:19:15,120
Speaker 1: that was hot. Well, look, you want to be talking,

359
00:19:15,160 --> 00:19:24,840
Speaker 1: you want to be see look, mommy, you citizens they'd

360
00:19:24,880 --> 00:19:27,959
Speaker 1: be like, come on, grand I'm not saying you might

361
00:19:28,119 --> 00:19:30,520
Speaker 1: just say, like, I think we should like think about it,

362
00:19:30,760 --> 00:19:33,320
Speaker 1: because why are we so afraid of like getting older,

363
00:19:33,359 --> 00:19:35,280
Speaker 1: And why does everybody think that sex is just going

364
00:19:35,320 --> 00:19:37,879
Speaker 1: to stop at a certain age, Because that's a bummer.

365
00:19:38,640 --> 00:19:40,600
Speaker 1: Like That's why I'm saying I want to be wild

366
00:19:40,640 --> 00:19:42,639
Speaker 1: in my sixties, because I want to be showing people.

367
00:19:43,040 --> 00:19:45,000
Speaker 1: I want to be like turning up with like my

368
00:19:45,200 --> 00:19:48,359
Speaker 1: hot throuble or whatever. Maybe I'm I don't know, who

369
00:19:48,480 --> 00:19:50,960
Speaker 1: knows what. I'm going to ask you why you say

370
00:19:51,040 --> 00:19:53,680
Speaker 1: that as you get older you would consider the throuble.

371
00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:55,600
Speaker 1: And I only ask that because in terms of like

372
00:19:56,040 --> 00:19:58,240
Speaker 1: marriage and long term relationships, right, that's a lot of

373
00:19:58,280 --> 00:20:00,600
Speaker 1: our goals at least to be with a at least

374
00:20:00,640 --> 00:20:03,840
Speaker 1: one partner, you know, And where I've heard a lot

375
00:20:03,880 --> 00:20:07,240
Speaker 1: of people in either long standing relationships or marriage, the

376
00:20:07,359 --> 00:20:10,119
Speaker 1: sex just plummets, maybe because they're getting bored with each other.

377
00:20:10,480 --> 00:20:13,199
Speaker 1: So you're saying that you don't even really like women.

378
00:20:13,840 --> 00:20:17,240
Speaker 1: Why would you consider a throuble relationship later on and

379
00:20:17,359 --> 00:20:19,920
Speaker 1: not now? Because I don't. I feel like you can't

380
00:20:19,960 --> 00:20:22,160
Speaker 1: knock things till you try it, if you stay open,

381
00:20:22,800 --> 00:20:24,440
Speaker 1: and so I like to just live my life with

382
00:20:24,520 --> 00:20:27,600
Speaker 1: that attitude in general, even outside of sex, just like

383
00:20:27,720 --> 00:20:29,840
Speaker 1: try new things. And I think that's important to not

384
00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:32,280
Speaker 1: just get like complacent and like sit in the same

385
00:20:32,280 --> 00:20:35,080
Speaker 1: old ship. And that's why it suffers, that suffers in

386
00:20:35,160 --> 00:20:37,639
Speaker 1: long term relationships. In my marriage, we were together for

387
00:20:37,680 --> 00:20:39,840
Speaker 1: thirteen years, and I have that problem. But that's because

388
00:20:40,040 --> 00:20:42,040
Speaker 1: what I do is like study sex all day. Why

389
00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:44,320
Speaker 1: don't you think you have that problem? That's what I do.

390
00:20:44,920 --> 00:20:47,040
Speaker 1: Like were you what were you doing actively that like

391
00:20:47,200 --> 00:20:49,399
Speaker 1: pulled it out? Because at the same time, like the

392
00:20:49,520 --> 00:20:51,840
Speaker 1: same guy you're used to having the same Like how

393
00:20:51,920 --> 00:20:54,720
Speaker 1: did you actually do it? I mean it was a

394
00:20:54,800 --> 00:20:57,360
Speaker 1: while ago now, but I think it was. I think

395
00:20:57,400 --> 00:20:59,560
Speaker 1: it was because I think you know how most people

396
00:20:59,640 --> 00:21:01,520
Speaker 1: have just to plant around areas of their life that

397
00:21:01,560 --> 00:21:03,600
Speaker 1: they want to improve in, like whether it's like you

398
00:21:03,760 --> 00:21:06,840
Speaker 1: do your workout like or you eat certain things or

399
00:21:06,880 --> 00:21:09,280
Speaker 1: whatever it is, you meditate, whatever it is. But like

400
00:21:09,359 --> 00:21:11,480
Speaker 1: people don't do that with sex. They think it's just

401
00:21:11,600 --> 00:21:15,040
Speaker 1: supposed to like be good automatically or like you meet someone.

402
00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:19,560
Speaker 1: Most people don't like actively aren't actively disciplined about like

403
00:21:20,920 --> 00:21:23,200
Speaker 1: taking the same time and the focus that they would

404
00:21:23,320 --> 00:21:27,640
Speaker 1: to like their gym routine or their diet or anything else.

405
00:21:27,760 --> 00:21:30,840
Speaker 1: I don't think they do with sex, which is shocking

406
00:21:30,960 --> 00:21:33,080
Speaker 1: me and said that this is also what you guys do.

407
00:21:33,480 --> 00:21:36,159
Speaker 1: I've had a partner who like was more focused on that,

408
00:21:36,320 --> 00:21:40,320
Speaker 1: like after sex, stretching, making sure like my hips were

409
00:21:40,400 --> 00:21:43,760
Speaker 1: Oh and that's like a thing now, like like intimacy,

410
00:21:43,880 --> 00:21:46,760
Speaker 1: give it to me, baby, But like where like my

411
00:21:46,920 --> 00:21:49,480
Speaker 1: hips or stuff, if he knew he really liked the

412
00:21:49,480 --> 00:21:51,440
Speaker 1: ship out of me, it would be like, well, I

413
00:21:51,480 --> 00:21:53,040
Speaker 1: don't want you to be hurt after this. I want

414
00:21:53,080 --> 00:21:54,919
Speaker 1: you to still if I come over tonight, for us

415
00:21:54,960 --> 00:21:57,280
Speaker 1: to still be able to go at it um. And

416
00:21:57,400 --> 00:21:59,440
Speaker 1: another thing that we really talked about was what we

417
00:22:00,080 --> 00:22:02,479
Speaker 1: put into our bodies. So I shared with a lot

418
00:22:02,560 --> 00:22:04,399
Speaker 1: of the men on here. He drank a lot of

419
00:22:04,600 --> 00:22:08,240
Speaker 1: beat juice which allowed the blood flow to stay. We

420
00:22:08,320 --> 00:22:12,200
Speaker 1: talked about recently about the same thing. Because the intimacy

421
00:22:12,280 --> 00:22:14,800
Speaker 1: isn't switching it up to me. You're talking about actively

422
00:22:14,840 --> 00:22:17,639
Speaker 1: trying something different. Well, not only actively trying something different,

423
00:22:17,680 --> 00:22:20,639
Speaker 1: but taking care of you as a person in what

424
00:22:20,760 --> 00:22:23,560
Speaker 1: you bring into the bedroom. To know, I feel like

425
00:22:23,720 --> 00:22:25,520
Speaker 1: that I could do. I feel like I've always been

426
00:22:25,560 --> 00:22:27,159
Speaker 1: able to take care of my body and be a

427
00:22:27,200 --> 00:22:30,640
Speaker 1: good partner, bring my a game, but actively being new,

428
00:22:31,280 --> 00:22:35,000
Speaker 1: like trying something new, discovering new sex, and like making

429
00:22:35,040 --> 00:22:37,520
Speaker 1: it a focus that's been hard. I don't know if

430
00:22:37,560 --> 00:22:39,760
Speaker 1: I'm really doing that. Then you bring in other people,

431
00:22:39,800 --> 00:22:42,880
Speaker 1: would you not say that are still something that you've

432
00:22:42,880 --> 00:22:45,240
Speaker 1: already done Like I was thinking, I don't know. I

433
00:22:45,320 --> 00:22:47,640
Speaker 1: feel like you're pretty. I feel like you're you're kind

434
00:22:47,680 --> 00:22:50,880
Speaker 1: of always changing up and trying new things because they're new. Guys, Liz,

435
00:22:58,600 --> 00:23:01,919
Speaker 1: I'm gonna ask you our favorite question to ask everyone.

436
00:23:02,480 --> 00:23:06,480
Speaker 1: You had to pick eat asks or suck toes? Uh

437
00:23:07,200 --> 00:23:13,879
Speaker 1: is as clean or dirty? They're both clean m m.

438
00:23:14,520 --> 00:23:17,120
Speaker 1: I don't know. I kind of might have a toe fetish,

439
00:23:17,960 --> 00:23:21,159
Speaker 1: might have a toe sucking fetish. I don't know. Just

440
00:23:21,240 --> 00:23:23,880
Speaker 1: when you said it just now put a big toe

441
00:23:23,880 --> 00:23:26,600
Speaker 1: in my mouth, you know, if it's like a clean

442
00:23:26,720 --> 00:23:32,760
Speaker 1: toe like no calous, we always say eat it. I

443
00:23:32,800 --> 00:23:39,040
Speaker 1: don't know what it is, even like I guess Mandy's

444
00:23:39,040 --> 00:23:44,440
Speaker 1: discovered like I literally like I have this was well,

445
00:23:44,680 --> 00:23:47,399
Speaker 1: I had a foot by my face and instead of

446
00:23:47,560 --> 00:23:49,560
Speaker 1: like because he was like really fucking and his leg

447
00:23:49,720 --> 00:23:52,120
Speaker 1: was up by my head and I just went over

448
00:23:52,680 --> 00:23:55,520
Speaker 1: started looking aside of his toe and like made his

449
00:23:55,680 --> 00:23:58,400
Speaker 1: foot come towards my mouth, and yeah, but in my mouth.

450
00:23:59,080 --> 00:24:03,240
Speaker 1: Kalile hos to discover a new ship. So finding the

451
00:24:03,359 --> 00:24:05,840
Speaker 1: love of your life and never getting to travel with them,

452
00:24:06,280 --> 00:24:10,680
Speaker 1: or being single forever and traveling the world finding my life.

453
00:24:10,960 --> 00:24:17,240
Speaker 1: I never getting troubles. I'm such a romancheck, not mean,

454
00:24:17,520 --> 00:24:19,960
Speaker 1: but I'm traveling. I still ain't been a grease bitch.

455
00:24:20,280 --> 00:24:23,200
Speaker 1: I want to go everywhere. I do not give a phone.

456
00:24:23,280 --> 00:24:24,920
Speaker 1: You know what, Now I can go with my friends

457
00:24:25,040 --> 00:24:28,840
Speaker 1: and this has been a problem in my relationship forever. Bitch.

458
00:24:30,320 --> 00:24:32,480
Speaker 1: I was singing my whole twenties, bitch, if you think

459
00:24:32,480 --> 00:24:34,280
Speaker 1: about it, I just got in my first relationship, and

460
00:24:34,600 --> 00:24:37,000
Speaker 1: as much as I loved it, I realized how much

461
00:24:37,080 --> 00:24:39,080
Speaker 1: my friends still come first. As long as my friends

462
00:24:39,119 --> 00:24:41,639
Speaker 1: don't go anywhere and we can travel the world together,

463
00:24:42,280 --> 00:24:46,439
Speaker 1: I'm fine my family, your friends, I do. But now

464
00:24:46,520 --> 00:24:49,480
Speaker 1: all of them I'm saying, like, Hey, that's why I

465
00:24:49,560 --> 00:24:51,800
Speaker 1: don't have that. You can travel, but you can never

466
00:24:51,920 --> 00:24:55,520
Speaker 1: have sex, a bitch. First off, I would never not

467
00:24:55,720 --> 00:24:59,359
Speaker 1: want to have sex. Well, I'm just saying that traveling

468
00:24:59,840 --> 00:25:03,760
Speaker 1: or I can travel everywhere no sex. You can travel

469
00:25:03,840 --> 00:25:08,280
Speaker 1: every no sex, or you find love of your life,

470
00:25:08,320 --> 00:25:10,240
Speaker 1: you have the best sex of your life, but you

471
00:25:10,400 --> 00:25:14,000
Speaker 1: have to stay in like you know, New York. Yeah,

472
00:25:17,280 --> 00:25:19,160
Speaker 1: I can't. Never gonna get sucked again. I think I'd

473
00:25:19,280 --> 00:25:21,160
Speaker 1: kill myself. Sorry if we had to put a trigger

474
00:25:21,240 --> 00:25:23,920
Speaker 1: warning for that. I just don't like. It reminds me

475
00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:25,800
Speaker 1: of when I was on lexapro and I couldn't come.

476
00:25:25,960 --> 00:25:28,440
Speaker 1: I was like, Wow, I don't want to die, but

477
00:25:28,600 --> 00:25:31,159
Speaker 1: I can't come in one out weigh the other. That's

478
00:25:31,200 --> 00:25:32,960
Speaker 1: why I got off. Oh yeah, I ain't gonna hold

479
00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:35,919
Speaker 1: you like my mom has been around me for the holidays.

480
00:25:36,280 --> 00:25:38,600
Speaker 1: And I'm cranky, and she'd be like, do you need

481
00:25:38,680 --> 00:25:40,840
Speaker 1: to go funk somebody, because I don't like this little

482
00:25:40,840 --> 00:25:44,199
Speaker 1: attitude you got right down, Like I literally get cranky

483
00:25:44,240 --> 00:25:48,200
Speaker 1: when I don't suck. So yeah, I think I'm not traveling.

484
00:25:48,480 --> 00:25:52,879
Speaker 1: I'm not traveling, Okay, damn Greece. So I've found a

485
00:25:52,920 --> 00:25:55,040
Speaker 1: Vanilla Sion article that I thought would be really cool

486
00:25:55,080 --> 00:25:57,120
Speaker 1: because you and I have talked about our love languages,

487
00:25:57,640 --> 00:26:02,280
Speaker 1: and apparently I don't know yours, but your love language

488
00:26:02,320 --> 00:26:05,640
Speaker 1: can tell you about how you argue and fight. I've

489
00:26:05,680 --> 00:26:08,840
Speaker 1: ever heard of that. Yours are access service, right, That's

490
00:26:08,840 --> 00:26:11,760
Speaker 1: what I like to receive. However, my love language now

491
00:26:12,359 --> 00:26:16,280
Speaker 1: in showing my love is physical touch and gift giving.

492
00:26:17,160 --> 00:26:19,159
Speaker 1: So how I give is different than what I like

493
00:26:19,280 --> 00:26:21,439
Speaker 1: to receive right now. It is acts of service as

494
00:26:21,520 --> 00:26:23,719
Speaker 1: to what I want to receive. So so I did

495
00:26:23,800 --> 00:26:26,440
Speaker 1: this quiz and I don't just have one love language.

496
00:26:26,640 --> 00:26:28,119
Speaker 1: That is what it turns as I said, mine is

497
00:26:28,160 --> 00:26:32,119
Speaker 1: gift giving. I think mine's gift physical touch and by

498
00:26:32,119 --> 00:26:34,560
Speaker 1: the way, gift give and words of affirmation. I like

499
00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:36,720
Speaker 1: that too. I like at all, even don't like that.

500
00:26:36,760 --> 00:26:38,800
Speaker 1: I'd be telling them how fine they are they don't care.

501
00:26:39,080 --> 00:26:42,160
Speaker 1: I think they because men like to be feed fucked

502
00:26:42,200 --> 00:26:50,080
Speaker 1: and flattered. And we used to say that three finance me, Yeah,

503
00:26:51,520 --> 00:26:55,119
Speaker 1: fuck and flatters. No, I'm saying that's what men. They

504
00:26:55,240 --> 00:26:57,000
Speaker 1: need to be feed, fucked and flattered. And you know

505
00:26:57,200 --> 00:27:01,160
Speaker 1: where women trip up the most, it's flatter them. Really,

506
00:27:01,960 --> 00:27:04,280
Speaker 1: it's because it's just like medium ugly niggas. We just

507
00:27:04,320 --> 00:27:06,320
Speaker 1: talked about that a couple of weeks. I don't know

508
00:27:06,400 --> 00:27:09,920
Speaker 1: why y'all like these ugly niggas. You can't flatter ugly kid.

509
00:27:10,160 --> 00:27:13,200
Speaker 1: You can always find something to flatter about someone, like

510
00:27:13,280 --> 00:27:17,159
Speaker 1: that T shirt like that. You could be like you

511
00:27:17,320 --> 00:27:19,880
Speaker 1: really know how to handle a car or whatever. Though

512
00:27:20,600 --> 00:27:22,840
Speaker 1: you have to wait. You know I just said that

513
00:27:23,280 --> 00:27:28,320
Speaker 1: he said, you know, laughed at me the man. Sorry,

514
00:27:28,400 --> 00:27:30,000
Speaker 1: let me stop saying that and worry you're gonna get

515
00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:31,159
Speaker 1: them me Like, y'all got a white woman and she

516
00:27:31,280 --> 00:27:35,480
Speaker 1: keep dropping a bomb. So I didn't go company, but no,

517
00:27:35,800 --> 00:27:40,000
Speaker 1: I literally so my little friend or whatever, he got

518
00:27:40,080 --> 00:27:43,800
Speaker 1: like a big truck and so I literally just so,

519
00:27:44,000 --> 00:27:50,399
Speaker 1: I literally we didn't even start drinking. And oh, big baby,

520
00:27:50,960 --> 00:27:55,600
Speaker 1: big old thing. So he was like in New York,

521
00:27:55,680 --> 00:27:58,119
Speaker 1: you got a parallel park, and I said, this is

522
00:27:58,160 --> 00:28:02,920
Speaker 1: gonna sound really crazy, but it turns me on so much.

523
00:28:03,080 --> 00:28:05,840
Speaker 1: How you fit this big old truck into these little spaces. Yeah,

524
00:28:06,080 --> 00:28:09,080
Speaker 1: I literally told him that, and he was like, bro,

525
00:28:09,160 --> 00:28:14,040
Speaker 1: why you be like But I was like, I never

526
00:28:14,160 --> 00:28:17,840
Speaker 1: told it turns me the way you be whipping this thing.

527
00:28:19,480 --> 00:28:21,960
Speaker 1: It turned me on because the Florida mothers don't know

528
00:28:21,960 --> 00:28:24,800
Speaker 1: how to know a previous problem. O my god. And

529
00:28:24,840 --> 00:28:26,240
Speaker 1: then of course I put it like he fits this

530
00:28:26,359 --> 00:28:30,000
Speaker 1: big old thing, and I like a man who can

531
00:28:30,119 --> 00:28:33,880
Speaker 1: like use his hands to build things, like who's like useful,

532
00:28:34,840 --> 00:28:37,840
Speaker 1: gonna like build me some shelves or like that picks

533
00:28:37,920 --> 00:28:41,760
Speaker 1: some ship around the house, tired right now here and

534
00:28:41,800 --> 00:28:46,000
Speaker 1: mandy about I'm taking out the alright. So words of affirmation.

535
00:28:46,160 --> 00:28:48,719
Speaker 1: This to me is super interesting because this is how

536
00:28:48,800 --> 00:28:51,600
Speaker 1: you fight. So you rely and are motivated by words

537
00:28:51,640 --> 00:28:55,480
Speaker 1: of affirmation. External sources will particularly someone you care about

538
00:28:55,560 --> 00:28:58,720
Speaker 1: making you feel good to reassurance, which means you're most

539
00:28:58,800 --> 00:29:02,120
Speaker 1: sensitive to people's word. It's the critical ones, especially about

540
00:29:02,200 --> 00:29:05,560
Speaker 1: your opinions and your actions. Fighting can make you feel miserable.

541
00:29:05,600 --> 00:29:09,360
Speaker 1: Miserable because you hate ugly language and heated arguments as

542
00:29:09,400 --> 00:29:12,440
Speaker 1: the worst case scenario, you're not quick to forgive. Not

543
00:29:12,600 --> 00:29:14,760
Speaker 1: to be dramatic, but it may take a while before

544
00:29:14,800 --> 00:29:17,160
Speaker 1: words of reassurance from your partner feel like they last.

545
00:29:17,280 --> 00:29:21,920
Speaker 1: Is that true for me personally, I'm like actually trying

546
00:29:21,960 --> 00:29:23,760
Speaker 1: to work on I write about it in the book,

547
00:29:24,000 --> 00:29:26,880
Speaker 1: in the chapter called Mindful Communication. I am really trying

548
00:29:26,920 --> 00:29:30,000
Speaker 1: to work on my temper and the way I communicate

549
00:29:30,120 --> 00:29:33,040
Speaker 1: in an argument, and like, especially when I'm piste off

550
00:29:33,080 --> 00:29:35,920
Speaker 1: and resentful at someone, Like I'm really trying to like

551
00:29:36,560 --> 00:29:40,320
Speaker 1: drop my ego and like listen and not be defensive

552
00:29:41,000 --> 00:29:42,480
Speaker 1: because I feel like a lot of times when we're

553
00:29:42,520 --> 00:29:45,600
Speaker 1: listening to someone, were immediately planning our response in our head,

554
00:29:46,240 --> 00:29:48,680
Speaker 1: like instead of taking them in, especially like if it's

555
00:29:48,720 --> 00:29:52,360
Speaker 1: a conversation where they're introducing, like even sexually, an idea

556
00:29:52,720 --> 00:29:55,200
Speaker 1: or maybe they're interested in another person, that immediately we're

557
00:29:55,240 --> 00:29:58,680
Speaker 1: going to be like fuck you. You know, I can't believe.

558
00:29:58,840 --> 00:30:00,640
Speaker 1: I can't belie you're saying this. But I'm trying to

559
00:30:00,720 --> 00:30:03,720
Speaker 1: be like bit more. Can we ask for honesty? But

560
00:30:03,840 --> 00:30:07,200
Speaker 1: then we don't handle it the way now because we

561
00:30:07,200 --> 00:30:10,160
Speaker 1: feel ejected, rejected or abandoned or all those things. I'm

562
00:30:10,160 --> 00:30:12,520
Speaker 1: trying to be Like the best thing that I think

563
00:30:12,560 --> 00:30:14,800
Speaker 1: I've been able to do is not feel stupid in

564
00:30:14,800 --> 00:30:17,960
Speaker 1: an argument, like ask questions whether they sound like they're

565
00:30:17,960 --> 00:30:20,720
Speaker 1: super simple or not. And also like when you say

566
00:30:20,800 --> 00:30:23,800
Speaker 1: taking ego out of it, like platonically or professional, Like

567
00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:26,600
Speaker 1: I'm trying my best to like if someone says something

568
00:30:26,720 --> 00:30:29,160
Speaker 1: and they're the type of person to feel like they

569
00:30:29,240 --> 00:30:31,080
Speaker 1: want because you can argue with a guy or a

570
00:30:31,160 --> 00:30:33,440
Speaker 1: woman and you're in a relationship and they need to

571
00:30:33,600 --> 00:30:35,600
Speaker 1: let you know, you know what I mean, like they're

572
00:30:35,640 --> 00:30:37,120
Speaker 1: the top dog. I kind of just let it go

573
00:30:37,800 --> 00:30:40,080
Speaker 1: because I can't change your personality. But if you are

574
00:30:40,240 --> 00:30:42,760
Speaker 1: right and I can acknowledge that, at least next time,

575
00:30:43,240 --> 00:30:45,120
Speaker 1: I can work towards you giving me the same grace.

576
00:30:45,240 --> 00:30:48,240
Speaker 1: But it's like I've definitely dated men that are just

577
00:30:48,440 --> 00:30:50,600
Speaker 1: so up their own asks that they just know what

578
00:30:50,680 --> 00:30:53,560
Speaker 1: they're saying is right and so immediately because they're they're

579
00:30:53,680 --> 00:30:56,959
Speaker 1: those types of people, I just I'm like, no, they

580
00:30:58,520 --> 00:31:01,280
Speaker 1: I'll give use the credit one where that's like one thing, Now,

581
00:31:01,880 --> 00:31:03,840
Speaker 1: what can I do? Like life too short? And that's

582
00:31:03,880 --> 00:31:06,719
Speaker 1: the problem about dating I would say older men. Um

583
00:31:06,840 --> 00:31:08,800
Speaker 1: even with my ex and even talking to older men

584
00:31:08,840 --> 00:31:11,400
Speaker 1: that I've been talking to recently, like I've been in

585
00:31:11,440 --> 00:31:15,080
Speaker 1: therapy for the last two years and so like I'll

586
00:31:15,120 --> 00:31:17,120
Speaker 1: let them know things they need to work on. And

587
00:31:17,320 --> 00:31:20,680
Speaker 1: older men, specifically older black men, I noticed, are so

588
00:31:20,880 --> 00:31:23,880
Speaker 1: against therapy because they feel like I've been this way

589
00:31:24,080 --> 00:31:25,840
Speaker 1: for this many years and it got me this far.

590
00:31:25,960 --> 00:31:28,040
Speaker 1: I'm comfortable with who I am. I even have this

591
00:31:28,080 --> 00:31:31,840
Speaker 1: conversation with my friends like how their partners just won't

592
00:31:31,920 --> 00:31:34,920
Speaker 1: seek help even in terms of just knowing how to

593
00:31:34,960 --> 00:31:38,120
Speaker 1: communicate with a partner. Like I'm not bashing you as

594
00:31:38,200 --> 00:31:39,800
Speaker 1: much as I feel like this is something you should

595
00:31:39,840 --> 00:31:43,360
Speaker 1: work on. And a lot of people not receiving EVE

596
00:31:43,440 --> 00:31:46,760
Speaker 1: that covers a lot of Yeah, but that's really stigmatized

597
00:31:46,800 --> 00:31:50,920
Speaker 1: still in therapy, especially for men. It is especially for men.

598
00:31:51,000 --> 00:31:53,200
Speaker 1: And then I know a lot of white guys who

599
00:31:53,440 --> 00:31:56,560
Speaker 1: are like obsessed with therapy and they literally will go

600
00:31:56,720 --> 00:32:00,960
Speaker 1: to therapy twice a week because literally like talk about

601
00:32:01,000 --> 00:32:03,320
Speaker 1: themselves and I'll be like, it's not working for you.

602
00:32:06,840 --> 00:32:09,880
Speaker 1: I'm like, literally, I'm like, you're paying someone to just

603
00:32:10,080 --> 00:32:12,520
Speaker 1: talk about yourself for an hour twice a week, and

604
00:32:12,600 --> 00:32:14,720
Speaker 1: it's not fucking working. Because you're still a man child

605
00:32:14,760 --> 00:32:17,240
Speaker 1: who has mommy issues. Um, so you need to see

606
00:32:17,240 --> 00:32:19,560
Speaker 1: a somatic therapist. And they're like, what's that. I'm like,

607
00:32:19,640 --> 00:32:22,920
Speaker 1: you're not in your body. What's that? Explain to me,

608
00:32:23,120 --> 00:32:29,040
Speaker 1: teach me your glasses. We have a horror derve tip,

609
00:32:29,080 --> 00:32:30,840
Speaker 1: but I feel like we've you've already given us a

610
00:32:30,880 --> 00:32:33,320
Speaker 1: great tip about sex, and it's discovering something new. So

611
00:32:33,440 --> 00:32:35,000
Speaker 1: we have a new thing we've been doing with guests

612
00:32:35,040 --> 00:32:37,160
Speaker 1: where they tell us a horror story which is a

613
00:32:37,560 --> 00:32:43,400
Speaker 1: terrible dating or yeah, okay, I have a good one. Well,

614
00:32:43,480 --> 00:32:46,760
Speaker 1: for me, it was a horror story. I was with

615
00:32:47,000 --> 00:32:51,120
Speaker 1: my boyfriend and it was like ten days into the relationship.

616
00:32:51,320 --> 00:32:52,880
Speaker 1: And I used to be the kind of person where

617
00:32:53,160 --> 00:32:55,600
Speaker 1: I literally would see someone, I'd be like I want

618
00:32:55,640 --> 00:32:57,080
Speaker 1: to suck the ship out of them, and then I'd

619
00:32:57,120 --> 00:32:59,440
Speaker 1: be in a relationship because, as you and I have

620
00:32:59,520 --> 00:33:03,240
Speaker 1: talked about, I cannot separate sex from love. I cannot

621
00:33:03,320 --> 00:33:06,160
Speaker 1: have casual sex. I just can't read me like a book. Basically,

622
00:33:06,200 --> 00:33:07,640
Speaker 1: when I told her about the skater guy, and as

623
00:33:07,680 --> 00:33:09,360
Speaker 1: you guys know, his girlfriend showed up on the date

624
00:33:09,800 --> 00:33:12,720
Speaker 1: and she was like, you can't suck him again because

625
00:33:12,840 --> 00:33:16,680
Speaker 1: you can't distinguish the two. Like then she told me

626
00:33:17,160 --> 00:33:21,600
Speaker 1: this sucked me up. So after I had sex with him,

627
00:33:22,320 --> 00:33:24,920
Speaker 1: I was sick for a week. But mind you, we

628
00:33:25,000 --> 00:33:28,080
Speaker 1: were kicking it all night. Sucked up whatever. She's like,

629
00:33:28,160 --> 00:33:31,920
Speaker 1: your body literally rejected him, and you went, did it?

630
00:33:32,080 --> 00:33:36,320
Speaker 1: Did she got sick for like a full bodies with people,

631
00:33:36,960 --> 00:33:40,640
Speaker 1: our bodies, no things, and our mind. Our logic tries

632
00:33:40,680 --> 00:33:44,600
Speaker 1: to disremard it, like imagine the things that you steal

633
00:33:44,640 --> 00:33:48,760
Speaker 1: in your She thought, that's what you know, I've never

634
00:33:49,640 --> 00:33:52,160
Speaker 1: put two into like the fact that I mean when Mandy,

635
00:33:52,160 --> 00:33:54,560
Speaker 1: when I tell you I was sick hours later, like

636
00:33:54,760 --> 00:33:58,960
Speaker 1: just because the girlfriend showed up the first time. This

637
00:33:59,080 --> 00:34:01,960
Speaker 1: is the first time I told you on Patreon, maybe

638
00:34:02,000 --> 00:34:08,000
Speaker 1: no one remembers the same. The skater guy sucked him.

639
00:34:08,040 --> 00:34:10,120
Speaker 1: And then because we used all those kind of then

640
00:34:10,200 --> 00:34:13,480
Speaker 1: we went on the date with the condom sex. Yeah yeah, yeah, no,

641
00:34:13,600 --> 00:34:16,040
Speaker 1: I sucked him first. It was amazing sex. And but

642
00:34:16,080 --> 00:34:18,279
Speaker 1: you were sick for like a week. I know. But

643
00:34:18,360 --> 00:34:21,360
Speaker 1: I lost six pounds and it jumps started finding so

644
00:34:21,680 --> 00:34:28,080
Speaker 1: didn't he It was you could just like lick a

645
00:34:28,200 --> 00:34:33,040
Speaker 1: door handle and he was sick. But well, oh waits

646
00:34:33,080 --> 00:34:35,280
Speaker 1: so you were sick, is like not where your vagina

647
00:34:35,360 --> 00:34:39,080
Speaker 1: was broken, but where like she was like was sick.

648
00:34:39,840 --> 00:34:42,480
Speaker 1: Because our bodies tell us things all the time, we

649
00:34:42,600 --> 00:34:45,320
Speaker 1: just don't listen. We all have intuitive wisdom in our bodies,

650
00:34:45,440 --> 00:34:47,600
Speaker 1: and we literally spend most of our time ignoring it,

651
00:34:48,239 --> 00:34:51,960
Speaker 1: ignoring those those little signals. In fact, like when you

652
00:34:52,080 --> 00:34:55,719
Speaker 1: talk to people who deal with like um violence, like

653
00:34:55,760 --> 00:34:59,120
Speaker 1: whether it's sexual violence or victims of violence, they'll often

654
00:34:59,160 --> 00:35:01,479
Speaker 1: tell you I have the strange feeling or I thought

655
00:35:01,520 --> 00:35:03,960
Speaker 1: there was something off, but I want to be polite

656
00:35:04,120 --> 00:35:08,320
Speaker 1: or ignored it. You're you're your own best psychic in fact,

657
00:35:08,520 --> 00:35:10,640
Speaker 1: really like your body will tell you. And if you

658
00:35:10,719 --> 00:35:13,560
Speaker 1: start to notice the cues, like for example, like you

659
00:35:13,640 --> 00:35:15,719
Speaker 1: can feel like is your what's your stomach doing in

660
00:35:15,760 --> 00:35:23,120
Speaker 1: a certain situation? Or your bowels? But I don't know, okay,

661
00:35:23,160 --> 00:35:25,320
Speaker 1: horror story. So I was like ten days into this

662
00:35:25,440 --> 00:35:31,919
Speaker 1: relationship and we're not. I know. I'm telling you, it's

663
00:35:32,000 --> 00:35:34,960
Speaker 1: like a problem. Like literally, it's why I do have

664
00:35:35,080 --> 00:35:38,359
Speaker 1: no self control. So I'm getting better. I'm getting better.

665
00:35:38,800 --> 00:35:41,719
Speaker 1: But um, so we weren't. We were still using condoms,

666
00:35:41,920 --> 00:35:45,520
Speaker 1: and the condom got stuck in my fucking cervix. It

667
00:35:45,600 --> 00:35:49,080
Speaker 1: got stuck in my services, which probably yeah, so I

668
00:35:49,480 --> 00:35:52,560
Speaker 1: that had never happened to me before. I'm like digging

669
00:35:52,760 --> 00:35:55,680
Speaker 1: trying to dig that ship out for thirty minutes in

670
00:35:55,760 --> 00:35:57,400
Speaker 1: the bathroom. I'm like, I don't have to go to

671
00:35:57,400 --> 00:36:00,840
Speaker 1: the hospital. It's gonna be like I have a fucking

672
00:36:00,920 --> 00:36:05,760
Speaker 1: sex company. This is so humiliating, like like bleeding trying

673
00:36:05,800 --> 00:36:08,600
Speaker 1: to get this thing out. And then I I finally

674
00:36:08,680 --> 00:36:11,400
Speaker 1: get it out, I'm like, I'm never having sex again,

675
00:36:11,600 --> 00:36:13,120
Speaker 1: of which I did. I go to the kind of

676
00:36:13,160 --> 00:36:16,840
Speaker 1: cologists in between, because that like forces the conversation basically

677
00:36:16,880 --> 00:36:19,359
Speaker 1: about not using condoms, which was like a little early,

678
00:36:20,080 --> 00:36:21,880
Speaker 1: but I was like, I'm scared to ever use a

679
00:36:21,880 --> 00:36:24,840
Speaker 1: condom again. Um. I go to kind of cologist that

680
00:36:25,000 --> 00:36:27,560
Speaker 1: was like on a Saturday. I go to condoge College

681
00:36:27,600 --> 00:36:30,319
Speaker 1: on Friday, and she's like, Oh, it's like a one

682
00:36:30,400 --> 00:36:35,160
Speaker 1: in a hundred thousand chance that that would ever happen again. Okay,

683
00:36:36,760 --> 00:36:43,759
Speaker 1: it happened to me the next day. Something he wasn't wearing. No.

684
00:36:43,920 --> 00:36:47,680
Speaker 1: I think they were too big wet, and I just

685
00:36:50,239 --> 00:36:56,319
Speaker 1: that's that's what you like out and had to come

686
00:36:56,360 --> 00:36:58,960
Speaker 1: off like I'll tell can you keep checking is it

687
00:36:59,040 --> 00:37:01,839
Speaker 1: still there? Because it's no A little yeah, for sure.

688
00:37:02,480 --> 00:37:05,080
Speaker 1: It made me paranoid like that, like you please, let's

689
00:37:05,160 --> 00:37:07,080
Speaker 1: chock Late's shot would have been next that I have

690
00:37:07,239 --> 00:37:08,640
Speaker 1: to keep. Did you have to pee it? Like? What

691
00:37:08,719 --> 00:37:11,960
Speaker 1: did you the same thing? No? No, I had, No.

692
00:37:12,120 --> 00:37:16,480
Speaker 1: I dug it out eventually. But like he might. He

693
00:37:16,640 --> 00:37:18,480
Speaker 1: might have been rolling that thing off because he ain't

694
00:37:18,520 --> 00:37:22,640
Speaker 1: wanted on his dick and all that she happened that quick. Yeah,

695
00:37:22,800 --> 00:37:24,880
Speaker 1: he was doing he ain't put it all right? Did

696
00:37:24,960 --> 00:37:27,160
Speaker 1: you put it on? Or he put it on? He

697
00:37:27,320 --> 00:37:28,920
Speaker 1: put it on? Put it all right? And he did

698
00:37:29,160 --> 00:37:31,960
Speaker 1: it because we had sex lots of times in between

699
00:37:32,040 --> 00:37:34,200
Speaker 1: that and it was ten days girl. Did he help

700
00:37:34,239 --> 00:37:36,640
Speaker 1: you take it off? No, he didn't help me take

701
00:37:36,640 --> 00:37:39,319
Speaker 1: it out, because it was like one person put out

702
00:37:39,320 --> 00:37:41,520
Speaker 1: the cell phone flashlight and was trying to look up

703
00:37:41,560 --> 00:37:45,759
Speaker 1: in my Okay. I could feel the edge of it though,

704
00:37:45,920 --> 00:37:48,520
Speaker 1: you know, and you can feel just a little rib

705
00:37:48,640 --> 00:37:50,520
Speaker 1: and I was like, and then I was afraid it

706
00:37:50,560 --> 00:37:54,480
Speaker 1: would like break off. And then your nails were this

707
00:37:54,560 --> 00:37:58,920
Speaker 1: short time I could feel it, were they like humiliated,

708
00:37:59,520 --> 00:38:01,600
Speaker 1: Like my nail else are not long right now, but

709
00:38:05,520 --> 00:38:07,560
Speaker 1: these are short and then it's still broke. I gotta

710
00:38:07,600 --> 00:38:09,600
Speaker 1: go to the salon and get it fixed. They don't

711
00:38:09,719 --> 00:38:13,640
Speaker 1: make acrylic and gel like they used to. I'll tell

712
00:38:13,640 --> 00:38:17,160
Speaker 1: you that they just don't. They just don't. It's cheaper

713
00:38:17,239 --> 00:38:20,560
Speaker 1: now I'm paying trouble the price, and the product is not.

714
00:38:20,719 --> 00:38:24,880
Speaker 1: The snails used to be so set and at lasts

715
00:38:24,920 --> 00:38:28,880
Speaker 1: a month, not anymore. I gotta go every goddamn two weeks.

716
00:38:29,640 --> 00:38:34,360
Speaker 1: So let's get back into this, okay, okay, um. So

717
00:38:35,400 --> 00:38:38,800
Speaker 1: I read the book in a PDF, which was so difficult,

718
00:38:39,080 --> 00:38:40,719
Speaker 1: even though you sent me a hard copy. I didn't

719
00:38:40,719 --> 00:38:42,200
Speaker 1: want to tell you the truth. I thought I lost

720
00:38:42,280 --> 00:38:45,160
Speaker 1: the book and my mom found it, so that was terrible.

721
00:38:45,400 --> 00:38:46,920
Speaker 1: I did this whole thing of where I was like,

722
00:38:46,960 --> 00:38:48,759
Speaker 1: I really want to read this book because Liz told

723
00:38:48,800 --> 00:38:51,160
Speaker 1: me a story about someone who didn't read it that

724
00:38:51,280 --> 00:38:53,920
Speaker 1: she cared about and like disregarded it. I was like, no,

725
00:38:54,040 --> 00:38:57,080
Speaker 1: I don't really read this ship. So she sent me

726
00:38:57,120 --> 00:38:59,000
Speaker 1: a hard copy and I was getting into it, lost

727
00:38:59,040 --> 00:39:00,560
Speaker 1: it and my mom called to me and she goes,

728
00:39:00,840 --> 00:39:03,919
Speaker 1: I just thought one of your sex books in the house.

729
00:39:04,000 --> 00:39:07,239
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, oh, it's my friends. But in

730
00:39:07,280 --> 00:39:09,279
Speaker 1: the middle of reading this book, I told you that

731
00:39:09,560 --> 00:39:12,320
Speaker 1: a lot of feelings came out, like you did a

732
00:39:12,400 --> 00:39:15,279
Speaker 1: lot of what do you call like the follow up

733
00:39:15,360 --> 00:39:18,120
Speaker 1: questions and things like the exercises, and actually just stopped

734
00:39:18,120 --> 00:39:20,479
Speaker 1: at one point because it was really making me think.

735
00:39:20,680 --> 00:39:25,000
Speaker 1: And I think I picked my favorite topics from this

736
00:39:25,080 --> 00:39:27,680
Speaker 1: because I thought Mandy and I definitely have brought up

737
00:39:27,719 --> 00:39:30,439
Speaker 1: things that this could be useful with. So the first

738
00:39:30,520 --> 00:39:32,120
Speaker 1: thing that I want to bring up that you had

739
00:39:32,160 --> 00:39:34,480
Speaker 1: some good questions that made me stop was the filling

740
00:39:34,520 --> 00:39:37,480
Speaker 1: the Void chapter. And this isn't one book again if

741
00:39:37,520 --> 00:39:40,560
Speaker 1: we could just mind. Yeah, that's Health and Consciousness, which

742
00:39:40,640 --> 00:39:43,200
Speaker 1: is out now, which is Health and conscious That's Health

743
00:39:43,239 --> 00:39:46,760
Speaker 1: and Consciousness because I want, yeah, I want to elevate

744
00:39:46,800 --> 00:39:49,239
Speaker 1: your consciousness. And on the cover of it, it says

745
00:39:49,280 --> 00:39:51,920
Speaker 1: free your mind and your ass will follow, like the

746
00:39:52,080 --> 00:39:59,640
Speaker 1: seminole like George didn't follow from me, like Parliament Fadelic. Okay, well,

747
00:40:00,000 --> 00:40:02,320
Speaker 1: buy your girlfriend this book and listen to it. You

748
00:40:02,360 --> 00:40:04,399
Speaker 1: can listen to it. I narrate it. Oh it's your

749
00:40:04,880 --> 00:40:08,360
Speaker 1: it's my audio book. Look, that's what she would because

750
00:40:09,280 --> 00:40:12,439
Speaker 1: because I just finished doing it like a two weeks ago. Yeah.

751
00:40:12,920 --> 00:40:17,000
Speaker 1: I love audio books, especially when the author gets in

752
00:40:17,040 --> 00:40:19,239
Speaker 1: there and it's their voice or their voice goes back

753
00:40:19,280 --> 00:40:21,319
Speaker 1: and forth, like I love I love audiobooks as well.

754
00:40:21,400 --> 00:40:26,440
Speaker 1: Did Obama do his own? But here I've just kind

755
00:40:26,480 --> 00:40:28,360
Speaker 1: of think about his voice and it's just like I

756
00:40:28,440 --> 00:40:30,239
Speaker 1: feel like that'd be a good one to listen. He

757
00:40:30,320 --> 00:40:32,279
Speaker 1: has a married man, look at you getting your rock

758
00:40:32,320 --> 00:40:39,799
Speaker 1: sof fantasy but not married anymore. I got to sit

759
00:40:39,880 --> 00:40:46,160
Speaker 1: that ass to me that as I'm sorry, booting hole. Freedom,

760
00:40:48,120 --> 00:40:51,560
Speaker 1: Let's get back to it. Listen Freedom, Okay, Filling the void?

761
00:40:51,600 --> 00:40:53,800
Speaker 1: Can you talk about that chapter because I want to

762
00:40:53,840 --> 00:40:56,000
Speaker 1: talk about maybe a moment where we've all had done that,

763
00:40:56,080 --> 00:40:58,279
Speaker 1: because I know I have, Yeah, filling the void in

764
00:40:58,320 --> 00:41:00,239
Speaker 1: what way? Like in any way like you could filled

765
00:41:00,280 --> 00:41:03,560
Speaker 1: the void with sex, with food, with drugs and alcohol,

766
00:41:03,800 --> 00:41:06,320
Speaker 1: with with with porn. It's kind of when you consume

767
00:41:06,440 --> 00:41:09,640
Speaker 1: something mindlessly just because you're like anxious, or you're lonely,

768
00:41:10,080 --> 00:41:13,360
Speaker 1: or you're feeling like bad about yourself. You're having like

769
00:41:13,440 --> 00:41:15,560
Speaker 1: a moment of low self worth. Like have you ever

770
00:41:15,719 --> 00:41:21,240
Speaker 1: just like just ate something like whatever, like two bags

771
00:41:21,320 --> 00:41:24,800
Speaker 1: of chips or sucking pizza because you're just feel shitty

772
00:41:25,040 --> 00:41:26,920
Speaker 1: and you kind of want to, like literally fill that

773
00:41:27,040 --> 00:41:28,680
Speaker 1: void you want to consume. And a lot of times

774
00:41:28,719 --> 00:41:31,759
Speaker 1: I think we use sex in that way for that.

775
00:41:32,280 --> 00:41:34,080
Speaker 1: I eat chocolate and ice cream when I'm all my

776
00:41:34,120 --> 00:41:37,320
Speaker 1: Paris and I'm like, well, I can do this, but

777
00:41:37,800 --> 00:41:42,720
Speaker 1: for the for the form filling a void, Um, that's interesting.

778
00:41:43,160 --> 00:41:44,920
Speaker 1: I would love to like look into that. I don't

779
00:41:44,960 --> 00:41:47,200
Speaker 1: feel like I do that often. However, I have um

780
00:41:47,960 --> 00:41:51,560
Speaker 1: been told that when something doesn't go my way, I

781
00:41:51,680 --> 00:41:56,080
Speaker 1: immediately look into something else that I can control, whether

782
00:41:56,160 --> 00:41:59,600
Speaker 1: it's something something else in my job, whether it's immediately

783
00:41:59,640 --> 00:42:02,000
Speaker 1: booking a flight to be with my friends, it's just

784
00:42:02,160 --> 00:42:05,520
Speaker 1: something I guess I escape. That's the same. It's kind

785
00:42:05,560 --> 00:42:08,400
Speaker 1: of the same thing. You're like when you're avoiding something

786
00:42:08,440 --> 00:42:11,080
Speaker 1: that you'd rather not feel like. It could be fear,

787
00:42:11,440 --> 00:42:15,160
Speaker 1: anxiety and security, loneliness, like depression, any of those things,

788
00:42:15,560 --> 00:42:18,200
Speaker 1: and you're reaching for something else. So it's okay, like

789
00:42:18,320 --> 00:42:20,560
Speaker 1: funk who you want to fuck, but just be conscious of,

790
00:42:20,680 --> 00:42:24,320
Speaker 1: like are you fucking this person because because you actually

791
00:42:24,440 --> 00:42:26,040
Speaker 1: want to and you want to feel pleasure, you just

792
00:42:26,120 --> 00:42:28,600
Speaker 1: sucking them because you feel so shitty about yourself. That

793
00:42:28,760 --> 00:42:31,400
Speaker 1: is the only way that you can like validate Basically,

794
00:42:31,920 --> 00:42:35,080
Speaker 1: you're worth because I think a lot of us use

795
00:42:35,200 --> 00:42:38,160
Speaker 1: sex in that way. So when we when we're mostly

796
00:42:38,440 --> 00:42:39,960
Speaker 1: as a culture, I think where a lot of us

797
00:42:40,000 --> 00:42:42,359
Speaker 1: were mostly wired to use sex that way, and that's

798
00:42:42,400 --> 00:42:44,960
Speaker 1: the message we receive all the time because like to

799
00:42:45,120 --> 00:42:48,160
Speaker 1: when you're like not feeling I didn't even tell you,

800
00:42:48,760 --> 00:42:52,279
Speaker 1: but I'll bring it up. I had sex recently. I

801
00:42:52,400 --> 00:42:54,000
Speaker 1: posted this picture of me in a rope with like

802
00:42:54,040 --> 00:42:56,760
Speaker 1: a ponytail, and it was like really cute, and everybody

803
00:42:56,880 --> 00:42:59,279
Speaker 1: was failing it and end up having sex at night.

804
00:42:59,320 --> 00:43:01,040
Speaker 1: And I remember in the morning I had fun. I

805
00:43:01,120 --> 00:43:03,440
Speaker 1: wasn't feeling down about it, but I said, and I

806
00:43:03,560 --> 00:43:06,759
Speaker 1: have sex because he made me feel pretty? Like was

807
00:43:06,840 --> 00:43:08,560
Speaker 1: that why I sucked this guy? Like I was feeling

808
00:43:08,560 --> 00:43:10,600
Speaker 1: super sexy that night and I was feeding into it.

809
00:43:11,080 --> 00:43:12,560
Speaker 1: And I thought about your book, because I was like,

810
00:43:13,000 --> 00:43:15,640
Speaker 1: what was the difference here? Like was I feeling down?

811
00:43:15,840 --> 00:43:18,480
Speaker 1: Because literally I only got dressed up to take a

812
00:43:18,520 --> 00:43:20,960
Speaker 1: cute picture and go out, so I was already feeling

813
00:43:21,000 --> 00:43:23,520
Speaker 1: like ship so I boosted it up with that, right,

814
00:43:23,960 --> 00:43:26,160
Speaker 1: So then the next thing that happens is I have

815
00:43:26,680 --> 00:43:29,600
Speaker 1: is I have sex? Did I do that because I

816
00:43:29,760 --> 00:43:31,960
Speaker 1: needed to feed into that was I feeling a void

817
00:43:32,080 --> 00:43:34,120
Speaker 1: or was I actually making an active choice to puck

818
00:43:34,160 --> 00:43:36,080
Speaker 1: somebody and I couldn't figure it out. Well, I don't

819
00:43:36,080 --> 00:43:38,640
Speaker 1: think you need to judge yourself. Is the thing is

820
00:43:38,719 --> 00:43:41,239
Speaker 1: like you just notice it, Like you don't have to

821
00:43:41,280 --> 00:43:43,880
Speaker 1: beat yourself up over it, over like eating the pizza

822
00:43:44,160 --> 00:43:46,719
Speaker 1: because you feel like ship or whatever. It is, like

823
00:43:48,160 --> 00:43:51,880
Speaker 1: you just notice it. You just you know, when you

824
00:43:51,960 --> 00:43:54,239
Speaker 1: feel like this again, you don't make that same or

825
00:43:54,560 --> 00:43:56,759
Speaker 1: you just noticed that pattern and you start to think

826
00:43:56,800 --> 00:43:59,880
Speaker 1: about like, oh, if I am mostly using sex and

827
00:44:00,080 --> 00:44:03,279
Speaker 1: this way, maybe I'm not tapped into like the full

828
00:44:03,440 --> 00:44:06,920
Speaker 1: potential of what my pleasure could be with sex. It's

829
00:44:07,000 --> 00:44:09,399
Speaker 1: kind of like reframing the way we think about things.

830
00:44:09,640 --> 00:44:12,400
Speaker 1: I do think I opened my shakers up whenever I

831
00:44:12,480 --> 00:44:15,879
Speaker 1: have sex. I opened your chakras up when I took

832
00:44:15,920 --> 00:44:24,520
Speaker 1: you to that Kundalini class, to a fucking Kundalini class,

833
00:44:24,920 --> 00:44:26,960
Speaker 1: And it was so funny because after we took it,

834
00:44:27,120 --> 00:44:30,279
Speaker 1: we're just gonna keep saying Kundalini class. Kundalini is like

835
00:44:30,400 --> 00:44:33,800
Speaker 1: Kundalini yoga, but it's this idea. It's very very ancient.

836
00:44:33,960 --> 00:44:37,319
Speaker 1: It's like it's like thousands and thousands of yours. There's

837
00:44:37,360 --> 00:44:41,840
Speaker 1: two fucking hours, two hour yoga class. It's not yoga

838
00:44:41,960 --> 00:44:43,879
Speaker 1: like you're like a downward dog and up and down.

839
00:44:44,000 --> 00:44:47,840
Speaker 1: It's really about breath and muscle control. This is not

840
00:44:48,600 --> 00:44:53,440
Speaker 1: if you're looking on YouTube, she's hold on. This is how.

841
00:44:53,880 --> 00:44:59,440
Speaker 1: It's not all like that. Well they handed out tick

842
00:44:59,520 --> 00:45:04,200
Speaker 1: that how a bunch of people doing this. This is

843
00:45:04,600 --> 00:45:09,719
Speaker 1: COVID's pre COVID. Literally, you have that thing ain't gone.

844
00:45:10,880 --> 00:45:13,719
Speaker 1: Was so fucking tired. My mouth was tired. I was

845
00:45:13,840 --> 00:45:17,120
Speaker 1: getting and like mind you, he's also he was like this.

846
00:45:17,360 --> 00:45:19,880
Speaker 1: He was sucked up. And Liz is like in her

847
00:45:20,040 --> 00:45:22,960
Speaker 1: zone like high back and like him and I canna

848
00:45:22,960 --> 00:45:25,080
Speaker 1: look at I tell you, But I was liking it.

849
00:45:25,200 --> 00:45:27,279
Speaker 1: It just was taken too long. You did two hours

850
00:45:27,280 --> 00:45:30,919
Speaker 1: a day. Okay, So you can get high from your

851
00:45:31,040 --> 00:45:33,800
Speaker 1: using your breath. You're high because you're so much like

852
00:45:35,560 --> 00:45:39,680
Speaker 1: delust your breath. That's why you like it. You can

853
00:45:39,800 --> 00:45:43,880
Speaker 1: bring yourself to orgasm using your breath. Orgasm. No, we

854
00:45:43,960 --> 00:45:46,600
Speaker 1: weren't learning that technique then, but I thought about my

855
00:45:46,680 --> 00:45:48,279
Speaker 1: book half of the time. Yeah, I teach it in

856
00:45:48,400 --> 00:45:51,960
Speaker 1: my book. Well, what Kundalini yoga does is it opens up,

857
00:45:52,000 --> 00:45:55,200
Speaker 1: so they say, Undalini yoga is like imagining your spine

858
00:45:55,239 --> 00:45:58,560
Speaker 1: like a serpent like that, Like it's a serpent, you know,

859
00:45:58,800 --> 00:46:00,479
Speaker 1: the head of the serpent is here and the tail

860
00:46:00,560 --> 00:46:07,319
Speaker 1: is that your paraneum. You know you like waking up.

861
00:46:07,560 --> 00:46:10,279
Speaker 1: It's waking up the sexual energy. It's waking up your

862
00:46:10,280 --> 00:46:13,480
Speaker 1: sexual energy. Definitely. I don't know it's because he was

863
00:46:13,560 --> 00:46:15,680
Speaker 1: there or if my mouth was open, but like I

864
00:46:15,760 --> 00:46:17,359
Speaker 1: thought about sex more than I had in any other

865
00:46:17,400 --> 00:46:19,280
Speaker 1: you know what else makes me really wet just getting

866
00:46:19,280 --> 00:46:22,359
Speaker 1: a random massage and when they get into them five like, who,

867
00:46:22,360 --> 00:46:24,000
Speaker 1: I hope they don't feel I'm getting wet down here.

868
00:46:24,360 --> 00:46:28,400
Speaker 1: I could just get massaged instead of But the thing

869
00:46:28,520 --> 00:46:33,000
Speaker 1: with the breathwork is like so d M T is

870
00:46:33,920 --> 00:46:35,800
Speaker 1: the thing that makes you feel high, right, and apparently

871
00:46:35,840 --> 00:46:37,640
Speaker 1: you can create that with them where you're doing that

872
00:46:37,719 --> 00:46:41,400
Speaker 1: kind of breathing, which we actually just had a Vanilla

873
00:46:41,440 --> 00:46:44,839
Speaker 1: ship maybe a couple of months ago, where the one

874
00:46:44,880 --> 00:46:49,359
Speaker 1: of the tricks to obtaining an orgasm is control of breath.

875
00:46:49,520 --> 00:46:53,600
Speaker 1: I write about it control making jokes now, but we

876
00:46:53,719 --> 00:46:55,680
Speaker 1: literally did just have that conversation here. It was like

877
00:46:55,760 --> 00:46:59,319
Speaker 1: a Vice or Cosmo article, but literally where people feel

878
00:46:59,360 --> 00:47:01,840
Speaker 1: like they have haven't been able to achieve orgasm a

879
00:47:01,920 --> 00:47:04,720
Speaker 1: lot of it. First, you have to be really comfortable

880
00:47:04,800 --> 00:47:07,840
Speaker 1: with a your partner, but just being comfortable in the

881
00:47:07,880 --> 00:47:10,920
Speaker 1: flow of how you're breathing. If you're like tense and

882
00:47:11,040 --> 00:47:13,000
Speaker 1: you're breathing or your heart rate is not at a

883
00:47:13,040 --> 00:47:15,160
Speaker 1: normal pace, you're probably not going to reach work because

884
00:47:15,200 --> 00:47:17,080
Speaker 1: most of the time we're not breathing, like just on

885
00:47:17,160 --> 00:47:20,440
Speaker 1: an average day, we're holding Yeah, no, we're holding our

886
00:47:20,520 --> 00:47:23,359
Speaker 1: breath a lot. We're not taking deep breaths and also

887
00:47:23,440 --> 00:47:25,640
Speaker 1: when you take deep breaths. But you also learn to

888
00:47:25,760 --> 00:47:28,480
Speaker 1: use your engage your pelvic floor muscles. And it doesn't

889
00:47:28,520 --> 00:47:30,480
Speaker 1: matter if you have a penis or evolved that you

890
00:47:30,600 --> 00:47:33,320
Speaker 1: have public floor muscles. It's the muscles that you squeeze

891
00:47:33,320 --> 00:47:36,680
Speaker 1: if you're trying to stop peeing basically, so it leads

892
00:47:36,719 --> 00:47:39,719
Speaker 1: to like heightened or orgasms. It leads to less in

893
00:47:39,840 --> 00:47:44,520
Speaker 1: continents as you grow older, meaning like not pissing yourself. Yeah,

894
00:47:44,719 --> 00:47:49,000
Speaker 1: it's like really good too about your pelvic floor muscles. Man,

895
00:47:49,120 --> 00:47:51,120
Speaker 1: if you want to learn how to use it or

896
00:47:51,160 --> 00:47:53,200
Speaker 1: you might be confused, make your dick chump and it's

897
00:47:53,239 --> 00:48:02,920
Speaker 1: around that area, Dick jump. What's some sex surgacy. You

898
00:48:03,000 --> 00:48:04,760
Speaker 1: brought that up in the book, and I was curious

899
00:48:04,920 --> 00:48:06,359
Speaker 1: if we can talk about that because I haven't heard

900
00:48:06,360 --> 00:48:08,879
Speaker 1: about that before. Those sex surgacy. If you if you're

901
00:48:09,160 --> 00:48:12,360
Speaker 1: thinking about different kinds of like sex therapy, like a

902
00:48:12,440 --> 00:48:17,680
Speaker 1: sex therapist, there's there's adjacent sex therapist like sex surguates

903
00:48:17,760 --> 00:48:20,600
Speaker 1: that will basically kind of teach you in a more

904
00:48:20,719 --> 00:48:26,120
Speaker 1: physical way. Are you lying, I'm not lying. I'm not lying,

905
00:48:26,280 --> 00:48:30,680
Speaker 1: but sex surgus sounds like if you can't not exactly

906
00:48:30,760 --> 00:48:32,520
Speaker 1: like that. It could be like a lot of times

907
00:48:32,560 --> 00:48:36,080
Speaker 1: will work with people who are disabled for example, that

908
00:48:36,280 --> 00:48:39,800
Speaker 1: may have like trouble finding partners or like having intimacy

909
00:48:39,840 --> 00:48:44,040
Speaker 1: with people, or need to learn different ways. Yeah, there's certification,

910
00:48:44,360 --> 00:48:46,759
Speaker 1: like now it's a legitimate thing. Or they could be

911
00:48:46,880 --> 00:48:50,040
Speaker 1: like some people may have like trauma, um, you know,

912
00:48:50,200 --> 00:48:52,600
Speaker 1: they may have vaginismus and they may not be able

913
00:48:52,600 --> 00:48:54,920
Speaker 1: to come, or they may like they or they may

914
00:48:54,960 --> 00:48:56,799
Speaker 1: have a rectile dysfunction. It could be like a whole

915
00:48:56,840 --> 00:48:59,760
Speaker 1: host of things that are normal things that happen to everyone.

916
00:49:00,239 --> 00:49:03,080
Speaker 1: But like sex surrogacy is like can be a more

917
00:49:03,440 --> 00:49:07,839
Speaker 1: like hands on type of therapy. Is it expensive? If

918
00:49:08,000 --> 00:49:10,400
Speaker 1: everyone listening is like, let me look into this, let

919
00:49:10,440 --> 00:49:12,640
Speaker 1: me look into it, Like what, there's all different levels,

920
00:49:12,680 --> 00:49:21,439
Speaker 1: there's all those levels of sex surgasy. Okay, I really

921
00:49:21,520 --> 00:49:27,160
Speaker 1: pull right, So like it's not like sex. It's not

922
00:49:27,320 --> 00:49:30,239
Speaker 1: sex work. You're not hiring a sex worker to have

923
00:49:30,440 --> 00:49:33,239
Speaker 1: sex with you. And I'm not disabled. No, I'm saying

924
00:49:33,280 --> 00:49:35,320
Speaker 1: a lot of people use sex cirgus for all different

925
00:49:35,360 --> 00:49:39,480
Speaker 1: kinds of reasons that ve all different types of the

926
00:49:39,920 --> 00:49:42,560
Speaker 1: wonder like what the differences would be not only in

927
00:49:42,640 --> 00:49:46,160
Speaker 1: what you engage in for say, assume an hourly rate,

928
00:49:46,360 --> 00:49:50,800
Speaker 1: like what that comparable to therapy? Comparable to therapy? But

929
00:49:50,920 --> 00:49:54,320
Speaker 1: there's more, but there's expensive. Well, I think it's like

930
00:49:54,480 --> 00:49:56,080
Speaker 1: you know, I think it depends on where you are,

931
00:49:56,200 --> 00:49:59,319
Speaker 1: what you're doing. And sometimes sex surrogacy can include touch,

932
00:49:59,800 --> 00:50:01,960
Speaker 1: so sometimes it doesn't. You know, it's all sorts of

933
00:50:02,040 --> 00:50:04,480
Speaker 1: different things. And like you obviously have a conversation with

934
00:50:04,560 --> 00:50:08,680
Speaker 1: that person and intake form before you is there is

935
00:50:08,719 --> 00:50:13,920
Speaker 1: it covered by insurance? I highly doubt. I highly doubt that.

936
00:50:14,120 --> 00:50:17,040
Speaker 1: I mean I don't. I mean, I think, you know,

937
00:50:17,480 --> 00:50:20,680
Speaker 1: sex is still something that we're so squeamish about abortions

938
00:50:20,719 --> 00:50:26,560
Speaker 1: are covered by well, what's crazy even freezing your eggs.

939
00:50:26,560 --> 00:50:29,400
Speaker 1: There's a lot of fertility things that still aren't covered

940
00:50:29,440 --> 00:50:32,520
Speaker 1: by some insurances or you have to go through outside sources.

941
00:50:32,640 --> 00:50:35,680
Speaker 1: But by the way, those are going to go away

942
00:50:35,760 --> 00:50:39,200
Speaker 1: too if we be wade, if there's a nationwide abortion

943
00:50:39,280 --> 00:50:43,000
Speaker 1: band IVF, egg freezing is all going to come under

944
00:50:43,080 --> 00:50:48,000
Speaker 1: that same rule of really yes, because it's discarding embryos,

945
00:50:48,520 --> 00:50:52,440
Speaker 1: and none of those assisted reproductive technologies would have been

946
00:50:52,520 --> 00:50:58,960
Speaker 1: possible if Roe v. Wade wasn't made legal in all that.

947
00:50:59,080 --> 00:51:02,080
Speaker 1: Oh yes, So all these like millennial companies that were

948
00:51:02,200 --> 00:51:05,440
Speaker 1: promoting like your freeze your eggs on Instagram, they should

949
00:51:05,480 --> 00:51:07,759
Speaker 1: have been like out there and they should be now

950
00:51:07,920 --> 00:51:10,600
Speaker 1: like really and you know, talking about these things because

951
00:51:10,600 --> 00:51:14,000
Speaker 1: it's already happening in a lot of states where people

952
00:51:14,040 --> 00:51:17,359
Speaker 1: are not allowed to. Yeah, it's a real thing. That's

953
00:51:17,360 --> 00:51:19,440
Speaker 1: why it's not like the issues at stake are not

954
00:51:19,640 --> 00:51:22,080
Speaker 1: just about abortion. It's really about so much more and

955
00:51:22,160 --> 00:51:25,319
Speaker 1: a lot of reproductive rights. By the way, I had

956
00:51:25,360 --> 00:51:30,680
Speaker 1: a conversation um with uh we talked about in our

957
00:51:30,719 --> 00:51:33,520
Speaker 1: Patreon but and I have five raids and was talking

958
00:51:33,520 --> 00:51:35,880
Speaker 1: about egg freezing, and I talked about it briefly with Mandy.

959
00:51:36,480 --> 00:51:39,319
Speaker 1: When I brought it up to Liz, it's really you've

960
00:51:39,360 --> 00:51:42,279
Speaker 1: really fucked my head up the last week, because, for one,

961
00:51:43,040 --> 00:51:45,080
Speaker 1: you're such a liberal person when it comes to any

962
00:51:45,160 --> 00:51:48,239
Speaker 1: kind of science, medicine or women's health rights that when

963
00:51:48,280 --> 00:51:51,160
Speaker 1: you told me egg freezing is such a capitalist thing,

964
00:51:52,200 --> 00:51:55,440
Speaker 1: I really never thought of it that way. So basically

965
00:51:56,239 --> 00:51:57,800
Speaker 1: I was telling her, like, I have to go freeze

966
00:51:57,800 --> 00:52:00,840
Speaker 1: my eggs now, right and let me talk. And you

967
00:52:00,920 --> 00:52:04,120
Speaker 1: were kind of like, you're young. You didn't even look

968
00:52:04,160 --> 00:52:05,880
Speaker 1: into how many eggs you have. And it wasn't like

969
00:52:05,960 --> 00:52:07,360
Speaker 1: it was me more than it was the doctor. I

970
00:52:07,400 --> 00:52:09,160
Speaker 1: didn't know what to do. You just told me to

971
00:52:09,239 --> 00:52:12,160
Speaker 1: do this right. And on top of that, it's like,

972
00:52:12,719 --> 00:52:15,879
Speaker 1: how do I even know about my own fertility? Later,

973
00:52:16,080 --> 00:52:18,520
Speaker 1: like why wouldn't I look into other forms of medicine?

974
00:52:18,600 --> 00:52:21,080
Speaker 1: But when I realized how much it costs to freeze

975
00:52:21,080 --> 00:52:24,440
Speaker 1: your eggs and how it is a lot of fearmongering tactics,

976
00:52:24,560 --> 00:52:28,160
Speaker 1: like I'm actually leaning the other way. My mom had

977
00:52:28,200 --> 00:52:29,560
Speaker 1: me at forty, not that I plan to have a

978
00:52:29,640 --> 00:52:33,200
Speaker 1: kid at forty, but like egg freezing is so common

979
00:52:33,280 --> 00:52:35,920
Speaker 1: to talk about now that you just think you should

980
00:52:35,920 --> 00:52:38,680
Speaker 1: be doing it immediately when you're like younger and single,

981
00:52:38,719 --> 00:52:41,440
Speaker 1: because the eggs are healthier. But like, why didn't I

982
00:52:41,440 --> 00:52:44,640
Speaker 1: think about acupuncture or even taking hormones or any other

983
00:52:44,719 --> 00:52:47,520
Speaker 1: ship besides let me freeze these eggs? Well, I think

984
00:52:47,600 --> 00:52:49,839
Speaker 1: also because a lot of doctors, you know, they only

985
00:52:49,960 --> 00:52:54,600
Speaker 1: have eight hours of sexual intake training in medical school. What. Yeah,

986
00:52:54,680 --> 00:52:56,840
Speaker 1: so a lot of times, like I have thirteen nieces

987
00:52:56,880 --> 00:52:59,560
Speaker 1: and nephews, I have a lot of I have four

988
00:52:59,640 --> 00:53:02,080
Speaker 1: brothers and a sister, but you know, we don't all

989
00:53:02,160 --> 00:53:05,040
Speaker 1: the same mom. But I've been yeah, around a lot

990
00:53:05,080 --> 00:53:07,399
Speaker 1: of kids and of different ages, and they all come

991
00:53:07,480 --> 00:53:09,759
Speaker 1: to me when they first got like you know, their

992
00:53:09,800 --> 00:53:11,799
Speaker 1: I U D or birth control, and they just tell

993
00:53:11,840 --> 00:53:14,960
Speaker 1: me these things. And like the gynecologists doesn't even ask

994
00:53:15,040 --> 00:53:18,160
Speaker 1: any questions about like their sexual history, their medical history.

995
00:53:18,480 --> 00:53:21,640
Speaker 1: They just like, here, take this. And people aren't informed

996
00:53:21,760 --> 00:53:23,600
Speaker 1: enough about their own bodies that they don't think to

997
00:53:23,680 --> 00:53:28,000
Speaker 1: ask questions. And especially black women have a really high

998
00:53:28,120 --> 00:53:32,480
Speaker 1: rate of fibroids. Yeah, which I was surprised that you

999
00:53:32,560 --> 00:53:35,239
Speaker 1: didn't know, like before coming into that that no one

1000
00:53:35,320 --> 00:53:37,640
Speaker 1: has told you that that you know, because so I

1001
00:53:37,719 --> 00:53:40,520
Speaker 1: knew that black women at fibroids, but not that that

1002
00:53:40,719 --> 00:53:42,840
Speaker 1: it's a huge rate. And then even on top of

1003
00:53:42,920 --> 00:53:45,359
Speaker 1: that saying I didn't even know, you're right, like at

1004
00:53:45,360 --> 00:53:47,239
Speaker 1: a friend of mine who had five braids and only

1005
00:53:47,280 --> 00:53:49,200
Speaker 1: knew because she went in fregg freezing because you have

1006
00:53:49,280 --> 00:53:53,120
Speaker 1: to request in ultrasound. But gynecologists should be having they

1007
00:53:53,120 --> 00:53:56,840
Speaker 1: should be informed on a lot of different issues, including

1008
00:53:56,960 --> 00:54:01,000
Speaker 1: like when it comes to racial disparity and in medical care,

1009
00:54:01,320 --> 00:54:04,000
Speaker 1: they should be trauma informed, and like we should know

1010
00:54:04,120 --> 00:54:06,440
Speaker 1: these things and question them, like, oh, you want me

1011
00:54:06,480 --> 00:54:10,440
Speaker 1: to spend likes on freezing eggs or whatever amount of costs,

1012
00:54:10,480 --> 00:54:13,320
Speaker 1: like ask some questions first, it's now just being sold

1013
00:54:13,520 --> 00:54:16,200
Speaker 1: and like or you know, not for long, right, I

1014
00:54:16,320 --> 00:54:19,439
Speaker 1: think realistically with the way the country's going. But it's

1015
00:54:19,520 --> 00:54:22,280
Speaker 1: like package does this thing that makes you a fucking

1016
00:54:22,360 --> 00:54:26,239
Speaker 1: girl boss or some ship like us your eggs, like

1017
00:54:26,560 --> 00:54:29,160
Speaker 1: go have a career, And it's just not that not

1018
00:54:29,280 --> 00:54:32,360
Speaker 1: only that, it's it's unfortunate that. Um, there was a

1019
00:54:32,440 --> 00:54:36,440
Speaker 1: recent study done and I can't I can't remember the percentage.

1020
00:54:36,440 --> 00:54:39,200
Speaker 1: I actually did have a conversation about this on period Sis,

1021
00:54:39,400 --> 00:54:44,759
Speaker 1: But um, recently, they've said for Black women who have

1022
00:54:44,920 --> 00:54:47,719
Speaker 1: frozen their eggs or are looking to go through UM

1023
00:54:48,040 --> 00:54:51,759
Speaker 1: I v F with a sperm donor specifically that now

1024
00:54:51,920 --> 00:54:55,120
Speaker 1: black women have to pretty much pink on not having

1025
00:54:55,200 --> 00:54:58,920
Speaker 1: a full Black child because there's not enough either eggs

1026
00:54:59,280 --> 00:55:02,800
Speaker 1: or um sperm donors that are black to fully, you know,

1027
00:55:03,000 --> 00:55:05,640
Speaker 1: create a full Black child. And I did a whole

1028
00:55:05,719 --> 00:55:09,800
Speaker 1: episode where a woman who was a kindergarten teacher, and

1029
00:55:09,880 --> 00:55:11,759
Speaker 1: it was so sad, like she made me cry during

1030
00:55:11,840 --> 00:55:14,560
Speaker 1: the episode because she was talking about how she's everyone's

1031
00:55:14,600 --> 00:55:17,759
Speaker 1: mom as a kindergarten teacher, and in terms of her

1032
00:55:17,840 --> 00:55:20,759
Speaker 1: seeking eggs, like and it wouldn't be a syrocate, it

1033
00:55:20,760 --> 00:55:23,319
Speaker 1: would just be her receiving an egg from someone else

1034
00:55:23,360 --> 00:55:26,760
Speaker 1: because she couldn't she had the body of a fifty

1035
00:55:26,880 --> 00:55:28,920
Speaker 1: seven year old and she was like twenty eight or

1036
00:55:29,120 --> 00:55:33,040
Speaker 1: thirty or something like that. Um And the conversation literally

1037
00:55:33,120 --> 00:55:34,839
Speaker 1: led into the fact that there's not even a lot

1038
00:55:34,880 --> 00:55:38,239
Speaker 1: of Black women able to donate eggs. So the fact

1039
00:55:38,320 --> 00:55:41,640
Speaker 1: that we may be reaching an arrow where you can't

1040
00:55:41,680 --> 00:55:44,440
Speaker 1: freeze your own but also for women who aren't producing

1041
00:55:44,480 --> 00:55:46,480
Speaker 1: eggs that want to go out and get eggs, they

1042
00:55:46,520 --> 00:55:49,239
Speaker 1: don't even have the option to get black eggs or

1043
00:55:49,280 --> 00:55:53,759
Speaker 1: black sperm donors anymore. Well, I mean guyacology, Like the

1044
00:55:53,880 --> 00:55:57,440
Speaker 1: father of the speculum was a racist motherfucker who was

1045
00:55:57,640 --> 00:56:00,920
Speaker 1: experimenting on slaves. So a lot of the things that

1046
00:56:01,040 --> 00:56:04,400
Speaker 1: we take for granted as like science and fact is

1047
00:56:04,480 --> 00:56:08,160
Speaker 1: based on really broken white supremacist systems, which I go

1048
00:56:08,239 --> 00:56:10,320
Speaker 1: into in this book that like the whole model of

1049
00:56:10,400 --> 00:56:14,120
Speaker 1: sex education and like the medical sexual system that we're

1050
00:56:14,120 --> 00:56:17,120
Speaker 1: dealing with is based on a broken system. And it's

1051
00:56:17,160 --> 00:56:20,160
Speaker 1: not like it's not teaching like young women and young

1052
00:56:20,200 --> 00:56:21,960
Speaker 1: black women. These are the things that like you need

1053
00:56:22,040 --> 00:56:24,560
Speaker 1: to know to ask your gynecologists, and is not teaching

1054
00:56:24,600 --> 00:56:26,920
Speaker 1: gynecologists and doctors. These are the things that you need

1055
00:56:27,000 --> 00:56:30,319
Speaker 1: to know to ask your patients. Do you have any

1056
00:56:31,160 --> 00:56:35,640
Speaker 1: resources that you used for your book besides like just

1057
00:56:35,800 --> 00:56:39,600
Speaker 1: your experience that you leaned on. Um So, I mean, well,

1058
00:56:39,640 --> 00:56:41,319
Speaker 1: I have been in the space for like a really

1059
00:56:41,400 --> 00:56:47,320
Speaker 1: long time. Library that I also I was working with

1060
00:56:48,040 --> 00:56:50,880
Speaker 1: the Chair of Sex and Relationship Therapy at u c

1061
00:56:51,040 --> 00:56:54,399
Speaker 1: l A for like a number of years. Um. Yeah,

1062
00:56:54,440 --> 00:56:56,600
Speaker 1: I work with like a lot of a lot of

1063
00:56:56,680 --> 00:56:59,960
Speaker 1: professionals and do a lot of really like contemporary research,

1064
00:57:00,560 --> 00:57:02,760
Speaker 1: but also I think the history is important. Like knowing

1065
00:57:02,880 --> 00:57:08,200
Speaker 1: about the the white supremacist, patriarchal history of like you know,

1066
00:57:08,920 --> 00:57:11,640
Speaker 1: sex and of the medical system is really important because

1067
00:57:11,640 --> 00:57:13,560
Speaker 1: it shows us why we get to a place today

1068
00:57:14,080 --> 00:57:16,720
Speaker 1: when the rate for fibroids for black women, for example,

1069
00:57:16,840 --> 00:57:20,320
Speaker 1: is so high because they're ignoring you, I mean, outside

1070
00:57:20,360 --> 00:57:22,960
Speaker 1: of that, they just also came out with a study

1071
00:57:23,040 --> 00:57:26,200
Speaker 1: that hair straightening products like the relaxers and the perms

1072
00:57:26,600 --> 00:57:29,640
Speaker 1: that are used a lot on black women with four

1073
00:57:29,720 --> 00:57:32,880
Speaker 1: sea hair to make it straight, actually is causing as

1074
00:57:32,920 --> 00:57:35,800
Speaker 1: well higher risks of uterine cancer and breast cancer for

1075
00:57:35,880 --> 00:57:38,360
Speaker 1: black women as well. So, like there's just a lot

1076
00:57:38,440 --> 00:57:41,000
Speaker 1: of things that are now coming to where we've even

1077
00:57:41,120 --> 00:57:45,560
Speaker 1: been forced to look like the European standard of beauty

1078
00:57:45,880 --> 00:57:47,600
Speaker 1: a lot for black women and even how we show up.

1079
00:57:47,640 --> 00:57:49,840
Speaker 1: They just passed what the Crown Act here in New

1080
00:57:49,960 --> 00:57:52,440
Speaker 1: York for a couple of years ago, and so now

1081
00:57:52,560 --> 00:57:55,360
Speaker 1: even the products that we were using just to appear

1082
00:57:55,840 --> 00:57:59,640
Speaker 1: aesthetically beautiful to society are also leading to a lot

1083
00:57:59,680 --> 00:58:03,480
Speaker 1: of these arm Oh I mean I've been you know,

1084
00:58:03,560 --> 00:58:07,080
Speaker 1: I've been doing a lot of reasons don't do that.

1085
00:58:07,560 --> 00:58:11,120
Speaker 1: He is talking to me about hair. Unfortunately, I have

1086
00:58:11,560 --> 00:58:13,880
Speaker 1: Dammy's white ass hair, so I never had to have

1087
00:58:13,960 --> 00:58:18,040
Speaker 1: relax her. Not unfortunately, bitch, I'll be mad. It's it's thin.

1088
00:58:18,200 --> 00:58:20,920
Speaker 1: That's why I'm a ball headed bitch. Now you know

1089
00:58:20,920 --> 00:58:25,360
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. If you and I'm like, like a

1090
00:58:25,480 --> 00:58:28,080
Speaker 1: lot of people are so lucky to have grown up

1091
00:58:28,120 --> 00:58:30,760
Speaker 1: like gen Z and the younger generation of kids because

1092
00:58:31,000 --> 00:58:33,360
Speaker 1: their moms are not putting it in their hair, right,

1093
00:58:33,400 --> 00:58:35,480
Speaker 1: I mean, like I don't have a friend I know

1094
00:58:35,680 --> 00:58:39,200
Speaker 1: that's putting anything in their kids here, Whereas like my mom,

1095
00:58:39,280 --> 00:58:41,080
Speaker 1: and it's not her fault, she's just like, all right,

1096
00:58:41,120 --> 00:58:42,400
Speaker 1: you want me to put you in a pony tip,

1097
00:58:42,520 --> 00:58:44,840
Speaker 1: Like we're gonna use this pack o relaxer, and like

1098
00:58:45,280 --> 00:58:47,400
Speaker 1: it takes you on a really shitty hair journey and

1099
00:58:47,480 --> 00:58:50,040
Speaker 1: it's honestly just we have to unlearn this ship. But anyway,

1100
00:58:50,080 --> 00:58:51,840
Speaker 1: besides here, the last thing I want to talk about

1101
00:58:52,120 --> 00:58:54,200
Speaker 1: this transcendent sex because the day I told you I

1102
00:58:54,280 --> 00:58:56,800
Speaker 1: was crying over love his lines, this day that guy

1103
00:58:57,040 --> 00:59:01,479
Speaker 1: crying over love his blood TV, I was. I don't

1104
00:59:01,560 --> 00:59:05,680
Speaker 1: understand that. I thought it was like a reality when

1105
00:59:05,760 --> 00:59:11,960
Speaker 1: people are like falling in love us the notebook, Maybe

1106
00:59:12,000 --> 00:59:15,680
Speaker 1: I would. I don't know how I cried. Everybody said

1107
00:59:15,680 --> 00:59:17,800
Speaker 1: this to me, did you said, is it sad? I

1108
00:59:17,840 --> 00:59:19,440
Speaker 1: mean any year ago? I mean I've cried on the

1109
00:59:19,440 --> 00:59:23,960
Speaker 1: first forty eight before. It's really it's really sad anyway.

1110
00:59:24,080 --> 00:59:25,920
Speaker 1: One of the guys in the Pods and If No

1111
00:59:26,000 --> 00:59:28,040
Speaker 1: One's Heart of Love is blind. Basically, it's an experiment

1112
00:59:28,120 --> 00:59:30,480
Speaker 1: where two people meet and talk and they've never seen

1113
00:59:30,520 --> 00:59:32,760
Speaker 1: each other physically and they fall in love. This guy

1114
00:59:32,960 --> 00:59:35,720
Speaker 1: is talking about how he had transcendent sex. I'm like,

1115
00:59:36,520 --> 00:59:39,200
Speaker 1: is there from Liz's book and the last time? Can

1116
00:59:39,240 --> 00:59:42,880
Speaker 1: you explain transcendent sex? Thats so, like I said, like

1117
00:59:42,960 --> 00:59:45,880
Speaker 1: breathwork can make you high, right, but sex can too.

1118
00:59:46,200 --> 00:59:49,360
Speaker 1: You have an altered state of consciousness, like before you

1119
00:59:49,440 --> 00:59:51,160
Speaker 1: have sex, and after you have sex feel like a

1120
00:59:51,280 --> 00:59:54,280
Speaker 1: really intense orgasm. You're not you don't feel exactly the

1121
00:59:54,360 --> 00:59:56,400
Speaker 1: same in that moment. You're sort of like almost like

1122
00:59:56,480 --> 00:59:59,640
Speaker 1: out of body. But transcendent sex is this idea that

1123
01:00:00,040 --> 01:00:02,320
Speaker 1: if you really the premise of the whole book is

1124
01:00:02,360 --> 01:00:05,720
Speaker 1: linking your sexuality and your spirituality. So if you can

1125
01:00:05,840 --> 01:00:09,160
Speaker 1: begin to like reframe things that way, then I feel

1126
01:00:09,200 --> 01:00:13,080
Speaker 1: like you can. It is possible to experience really heightened

1127
01:00:13,120 --> 01:00:16,440
Speaker 1: states of bliss and ecstasy with sex. So that is

1128
01:00:16,520 --> 01:00:25,200
Speaker 1: what transcendent sexes in a way. So it's reaching out

1129
01:00:25,200 --> 01:00:27,240
Speaker 1: without the shrooms, so the galaxy lights. I'll reach it

1130
01:00:27,360 --> 01:00:30,440
Speaker 1: just with the galaxy lights sometimes too, what I do

1131
01:00:33,680 --> 01:00:36,840
Speaker 1: you know it both interviewed somebody that told us he

1132
01:00:37,000 --> 01:00:41,280
Speaker 1: meditates to an Egyptian drum circle before he sucks, and

1133
01:00:41,560 --> 01:00:43,520
Speaker 1: I was kind of sitting there like laughing, but at

1134
01:00:43,560 --> 01:00:45,240
Speaker 1: the same time, I'm like, well, you know what, the

1135
01:00:45,320 --> 01:00:48,080
Speaker 1: sex you have probably is better than mine because if

1136
01:00:48,120 --> 01:00:50,920
Speaker 1: you're really taking all that time to prep for sex

1137
01:00:51,200 --> 01:00:55,040
Speaker 1: and with the person, that's next level ship. Well, my

1138
01:00:55,720 --> 01:00:59,320
Speaker 1: last my ex boyfriend, I he wasn't into Cundalini or

1139
01:01:00,000 --> 01:01:02,600
Speaker 1: yourge body or any of that ship, but I got

1140
01:01:02,680 --> 01:01:05,120
Speaker 1: him to do Kundalinio Go with Me, which is again

1141
01:01:05,320 --> 01:01:08,440
Speaker 1: about breath work and muscle connect for like thirty minutes.

1142
01:01:08,520 --> 01:01:11,360
Speaker 1: She said two hours were shorter. They have shorter sessions.

1143
01:01:11,440 --> 01:01:17,320
Speaker 1: She put definitely took them to an advanced class, but

1144
01:01:17,480 --> 01:01:20,240
Speaker 1: she couldn't handle it. Well, you know when you're like, no,

1145
01:01:20,360 --> 01:01:21,640
Speaker 1: let me sign it, She's like, I got it. I

1146
01:01:21,680 --> 01:01:26,080
Speaker 1: couldn't see ship before we got there. I was like, also,

1147
01:01:26,600 --> 01:01:29,160
Speaker 1: I might have been ninety minutes, but it wasn't two hours.

1148
01:01:29,720 --> 01:01:36,920
Speaker 1: She's exaggerating. It makes the story better. It was interesting

1149
01:01:37,000 --> 01:01:39,800
Speaker 1: because I'm laughing about it. But also when you start

1150
01:01:39,880 --> 01:01:42,720
Speaker 1: taking it serious, it does work. It does work. So

1151
01:01:42,920 --> 01:01:45,160
Speaker 1: we were having we were doing this like breath work

1152
01:01:45,440 --> 01:01:49,160
Speaker 1: and this Kundalini together every morning for like a week straight,

1153
01:01:49,320 --> 01:01:53,240
Speaker 1: and we had I had cervical orgasm so deep. I

1154
01:01:53,440 --> 01:01:57,160
Speaker 1: fucking blacked out because the sex. We were so connected.

1155
01:01:59,600 --> 01:02:02,160
Speaker 1: I'm I'm gonna growing up in a hospital and be like,

1156
01:02:02,440 --> 01:02:10,320
Speaker 1: what happened? Move me back? If i I'm death by orgasma.

1157
01:02:10,840 --> 01:02:13,480
Speaker 1: Well you know that the French word for orgasm la

1158
01:02:13,560 --> 01:02:19,920
Speaker 1: petite morta little death, you know. So it's that idea

1159
01:02:20,000 --> 01:02:22,000
Speaker 1: that like what do I know what I mean? Yeah,

1160
01:02:22,440 --> 01:02:28,080
Speaker 1: she's she's been to friends. Everyone watching this show knows

1161
01:02:28,200 --> 01:02:31,000
Speaker 1: that she has been too FROs. You know what you'd

1162
01:02:31,080 --> 01:02:33,360
Speaker 1: like to join at some point in time, but if

1163
01:02:33,400 --> 01:02:36,240
Speaker 1: you did live, you'll get it. I walk the streets.

1164
01:02:36,400 --> 01:02:41,480
Speaker 1: It's like the snails. I love it. Every time I

1165
01:02:41,560 --> 01:02:43,520
Speaker 1: go to Soho, I go to a little spot. We

1166
01:02:43,600 --> 01:02:47,000
Speaker 1: went too far to about love it. Give it as

1167
01:02:47,040 --> 01:02:49,960
Speaker 1: car guy, please, where is my you know, all my

1168
01:02:50,120 --> 01:02:52,400
Speaker 1: French friends, Like when I'm eating s cargo, They're like,

1169
01:02:52,520 --> 01:02:55,040
Speaker 1: we see, like you can't eat every meal, like it's

1170
01:02:55,080 --> 01:02:59,720
Speaker 1: not even meant it actually snails snaps is feeling and

1171
01:02:59,760 --> 01:03:05,440
Speaker 1: crew like I love like some sales that they're like

1172
01:03:05,640 --> 01:03:09,240
Speaker 1: soaked in butter and garlet makes so good and like

1173
01:03:09,320 --> 01:03:18,720
Speaker 1: a little bit it's so small and then you're taking

1174
01:03:18,760 --> 01:03:21,560
Speaker 1: the bread and you're stopping up. It's a thing. Anyway,

1175
01:03:22,400 --> 01:03:24,880
Speaker 1: we're about t about this sex that I was just

1176
01:03:24,920 --> 01:03:26,920
Speaker 1: gonna say, tell people where to find you, but yeah, please,

1177
01:03:27,040 --> 01:03:29,240
Speaker 1: yeah you can find us. We are a podcast The

1178
01:03:29,280 --> 01:03:31,160
Speaker 1: Sex Said that I host. You can find us on

1179
01:03:31,240 --> 01:03:33,880
Speaker 1: the internet at the Sex Said. We have tons of

1180
01:03:33,960 --> 01:03:39,280
Speaker 1: resources a sex Pedia, which is like a living Wikipedia

1181
01:03:39,360 --> 01:03:41,720
Speaker 1: of sex terms, and you can find us on Instagram

1182
01:03:41,800 --> 01:03:44,200
Speaker 1: at the sex Aid and me at Goldilocks g How

1183
01:03:44,280 --> 01:03:46,280
Speaker 1: often real quick do you update as well a sex

1184
01:03:46,320 --> 01:03:49,440
Speaker 1: pedia because there's always all words at other time and

1185
01:03:49,480 --> 01:03:52,760
Speaker 1: I love throwing in things like strobe light honey, like

1186
01:03:52,880 --> 01:03:56,080
Speaker 1: I love some strobe honey. You guys are obviously not

1187
01:03:56,160 --> 01:04:01,720
Speaker 1: familiar with nineties hip hop. Girl, Where were you need

1188
01:04:01,880 --> 01:04:05,160
Speaker 1: listen to like old hip hop, I felt like a

1189
01:04:05,240 --> 01:04:07,920
Speaker 1: song name. No, it's like a colloquialism. It's like a

1190
01:04:07,960 --> 01:04:20,600
Speaker 1: slang term that's called some white ship, some white word. Wait,

1191
01:04:20,640 --> 01:04:23,600
Speaker 1: what strong it's a library word. Lots of songs. Strobe

1192
01:04:23,680 --> 01:04:25,360
Speaker 1: light honey. You need to ask him here about what

1193
01:04:25,440 --> 01:04:28,000
Speaker 1: a strobe light. Now, let me tell you. Everybody wants

1194
01:04:28,040 --> 01:04:30,320
Speaker 1: to joke about how I hang with a legend and

1195
01:04:30,360 --> 01:04:33,080
Speaker 1: don't know that his songs. I'm gonna tell you right now. Yeah,

1196
01:04:33,120 --> 01:04:36,480
Speaker 1: but he will school you on nineties hip hop. That's

1197
01:04:36,520 --> 01:04:39,680
Speaker 1: my point. Every time the strobe light honey is a

1198
01:04:39,760 --> 01:04:41,960
Speaker 1: honey that looks hot under the strobe lights, but not

1199
01:04:42,160 --> 01:04:43,680
Speaker 1: so good when you get her own from the club.

1200
01:04:44,960 --> 01:04:51,720
Speaker 1: That's a sub It's just an updated term. Yeah, we

1201
01:04:51,840 --> 01:04:53,960
Speaker 1: had Tip Drew about it about it early two thousands.

1202
01:04:54,000 --> 01:04:58,360
Speaker 1: That turned into two We were two thousands because face you.

1203
01:04:58,560 --> 01:05:01,520
Speaker 1: But if you listen to like Trium called Quest or

1204
01:05:01,720 --> 01:05:09,880
Speaker 1: like day Law, don't okay, Well you know I streaming,

1205
01:05:10,800 --> 01:05:15,720
Speaker 1: you can't stream them on Spotify. You're a hot bitch,

1206
01:05:15,960 --> 01:05:18,640
Speaker 1: shank you. Yeah, you look you look good under like

1207
01:05:18,880 --> 01:05:22,680
Speaker 1: full Studio is hot bitch in there? It's not should

1208
01:05:22,720 --> 01:05:25,640
Speaker 1: be but I didn't include white ass pussy whop in that.

1209
01:05:26,400 --> 01:05:30,080
Speaker 1: That just footnoted because you know, Middle America might be

1210
01:05:30,360 --> 01:05:34,680
Speaker 1: not be familiar with the way the way the politicians

1211
01:05:34,840 --> 01:05:37,680
Speaker 1: put it on Fox News and CNN, and we're upset

1212
01:05:38,080 --> 01:05:40,720
Speaker 1: Middle America know what I feel like you think people know.

1213
01:05:40,880 --> 01:05:43,080
Speaker 1: But shout out to Hannah Burner. We've had her on

1214
01:05:43,160 --> 01:05:46,520
Speaker 1: the show. She has a video with her brother, who

1215
01:05:46,520 --> 01:05:48,200
Speaker 1: I think she said, lives in Idaho or something, and

1216
01:05:48,280 --> 01:05:52,000
Speaker 1: she starts showing him influences. One black every it was

1217
01:05:52,080 --> 01:05:57,720
Speaker 1: Hailey Biever, Bella, Bella hadid um all in its also

1218
01:05:57,720 --> 01:06:02,440
Speaker 1: a million dollar Models Kylie Jenner. He couldn't name anyone. No,

1219
01:06:02,640 --> 01:06:04,960
Speaker 1: people just have their own frame of reference. We were

1220
01:06:04,960 --> 01:06:07,040
Speaker 1: out to dinner the other night with someone and we

1221
01:06:07,120 --> 01:06:13,000
Speaker 1: were talking about charlet the main Che No Charletagne, Charlotagne.

1222
01:06:13,720 --> 01:06:15,520
Speaker 1: She didn't know who he was and she and I

1223
01:06:15,640 --> 01:06:18,440
Speaker 1: just in Unison was like, you don't. We couldn't believe.

1224
01:06:18,880 --> 01:06:21,520
Speaker 1: To be honest with you, this person that we were

1225
01:06:21,520 --> 01:06:27,960
Speaker 1: out with is very famous, very successful person. Shocked bro Yeah,

1226
01:06:28,440 --> 01:06:30,640
Speaker 1: like I at one point I thought it was a

1227
01:06:30,760 --> 01:06:33,720
Speaker 1: joke and then Liz was like, let me give her

1228
01:06:33,840 --> 01:06:37,480
Speaker 1: some I was like you know, listen, She's like what, No,

1229
01:06:38,640 --> 01:06:41,040
Speaker 1: I just think people have like their everybody has like

1230
01:06:41,120 --> 01:06:43,320
Speaker 1: a different frame of reference. That's the same way. Like

1231
01:06:43,440 --> 01:06:45,919
Speaker 1: for me, I don't know these tiktoker's. My home girls

1232
01:06:45,920 --> 01:06:48,400
Speaker 1: will hit me up about like certain rappers baby Mama's

1233
01:06:48,440 --> 01:06:52,080
Speaker 1: who I don't know who. I'm also not in the

1234
01:06:52,160 --> 01:06:54,560
Speaker 1: breakfast club. I don't think we can compare to that

1235
01:06:54,640 --> 01:06:57,960
Speaker 1: because it's it's like how many years fifteen now, Like,

1236
01:06:58,040 --> 01:07:00,800
Speaker 1: come on, bro, there's a a lot he's mogul, but

1237
01:07:00,920 --> 01:07:03,440
Speaker 1: there's a lot of people like on barstool, like or

1238
01:07:03,480 --> 01:07:05,880
Speaker 1: even podcasters. When I'm looking at like the top fifty,

1239
01:07:06,280 --> 01:07:08,680
Speaker 1: there's so many people that garner millions of millions of

1240
01:07:08,760 --> 01:07:15,840
Speaker 1: you people the bed about like a lot of white podcasts.

1241
01:07:15,880 --> 01:07:18,080
Speaker 1: But I told you, dear media has been coming to

1242
01:07:18,280 --> 01:07:24,000
Speaker 1: my studio and Andrew Charlton thinking Fantino, you know that

1243
01:07:24,120 --> 01:07:26,640
Speaker 1: is I'm still freaking about the story about the one

1244
01:07:26,720 --> 01:07:29,560
Speaker 1: white I don't want to say her name. Somebody asked

1245
01:07:29,600 --> 01:07:37,640
Speaker 1: me like he was fetched me some water. Was was

1246
01:07:37,680 --> 01:07:39,560
Speaker 1: she from Europe or something like does she have an

1247
01:07:39,600 --> 01:07:47,240
Speaker 1: accent them? She really said it like some water. Yeah,

1248
01:07:49,000 --> 01:07:51,880
Speaker 1: But like I've had one of the engineers, like, oh,

1249
01:07:51,960 --> 01:07:53,400
Speaker 1: this is eazy, but it is what I want to

1250
01:07:53,440 --> 01:07:57,400
Speaker 1: I was saying, hey, what's catching me some water? Maybe

1251
01:07:57,440 --> 01:07:59,760
Speaker 1: she was trying to make fetch a word. Maybe she

1252
01:07:59,800 --> 01:08:01,280
Speaker 1: had just you know what I mean, you just watch me.

1253
01:08:01,680 --> 01:08:04,080
Speaker 1: She just watched me and girl, maybe she was trying

1254
01:08:04,120 --> 01:08:06,720
Speaker 1: to make fetch it. You know, I don't remember how

1255
01:08:06,880 --> 01:08:08,640
Speaker 1: I remember telling her I don't really fetch around here.

1256
01:08:08,680 --> 01:08:14,080
Speaker 1: But uh, but like no, I um there the podcast

1257
01:08:14,120 --> 01:08:17,639
Speaker 1: Tiger Bellue of Bobby Lee, Andrew Santina Whiskey Ginger. These

1258
01:08:17,680 --> 01:08:20,400
Speaker 1: are huge podcasts that like I've never heard of, and

1259
01:08:20,800 --> 01:08:23,080
Speaker 1: I do think we get in our own box and

1260
01:08:23,360 --> 01:08:25,120
Speaker 1: you know, there's a lot of people that don't know

1261
01:08:25,160 --> 01:08:27,680
Speaker 1: who we are, absolutely, but we're big in our in

1262
01:08:27,760 --> 01:08:29,559
Speaker 1: our own sphere, and like it's that kind of ship.

1263
01:08:29,640 --> 01:08:32,040
Speaker 1: But I do my best to try to like figure

1264
01:08:32,080 --> 01:08:34,720
Speaker 1: out across the board who the people are. Ye. But

1265
01:08:34,880 --> 01:08:37,800
Speaker 1: sometimes like you have to break down language for people

1266
01:08:37,920 --> 01:08:40,160
Speaker 1: or you have to like explain things more. That's why

1267
01:08:40,240 --> 01:08:42,320
Speaker 1: in the book there's all these footnotes. No. I had

1268
01:08:42,360 --> 01:08:44,799
Speaker 1: to argue with my publisher that lost in the sauce

1269
01:08:45,120 --> 01:08:47,080
Speaker 1: is like a real term that people use. They're like

1270
01:08:47,160 --> 01:08:49,760
Speaker 1: that's isn't the thing. I was like, yes, it is

1271
01:08:50,560 --> 01:08:56,160
Speaker 1: that phrase me too, especially on development calls. I'm like, Okay,

1272
01:08:56,160 --> 01:08:58,439
Speaker 1: everybody's get a little lost in the sauce here. But

1273
01:08:58,680 --> 01:09:02,040
Speaker 1: I'm dealing with a self help publisher who publishes like

1274
01:09:02,439 --> 01:09:07,599
Speaker 1: whim Hoff and Burnet Brown and then they don't people

1275
01:09:07,640 --> 01:09:11,280
Speaker 1: don't know either. Maybe it listen horrible and she's huge.

1276
01:09:11,360 --> 01:09:14,400
Speaker 1: She she's amazing, and she talks a lot about vulnerability.

1277
01:09:14,479 --> 01:09:16,560
Speaker 1: But what I'm saying is people who are in the

1278
01:09:16,640 --> 01:09:19,080
Speaker 1: self help space, they may not be so familiar with

1279
01:09:19,160 --> 01:09:22,360
Speaker 1: hip hop, some of them. As it turns out, because

1280
01:09:22,360 --> 01:09:24,120
Speaker 1: I had a lot of hip hop references in this

1281
01:09:24,280 --> 01:09:28,759
Speaker 1: book that the copy editor was like, I don't understand girl.

1282
01:09:28,880 --> 01:09:31,120
Speaker 1: I hope you send them the Google reference. Here you go,

1283
01:09:31,320 --> 01:09:33,840
Speaker 1: don't ask me again. We're keeping it in net. Whenever

1284
01:09:33,960 --> 01:09:36,360
Speaker 1: someone tells me they don't understand something, I'm saying, I'm

1285
01:09:36,360 --> 01:09:38,040
Speaker 1: an email. I just always read it. I'm like, she

1286
01:09:38,280 --> 01:09:41,800
Speaker 1: is calling me be a word right here. This is it.

1287
01:09:42,720 --> 01:09:46,439
Speaker 1: This is Liz. Please also let us know where everyone

1288
01:09:46,560 --> 01:09:48,680
Speaker 1: can purchase your book before we get out of here.

1289
01:09:48,840 --> 01:09:54,120
Speaker 1: They can buy the book anywhere you buy books. No,

1290
01:09:54,360 --> 01:09:56,000
Speaker 1: I mean, I mean I feel like most people buy

1291
01:09:56,000 --> 01:09:58,479
Speaker 1: books on the internet now, although it's really good to

1292
01:09:58,520 --> 01:10:02,920
Speaker 1: support your local bookseller. But there you know, but yeah, Amazon, Audible,

1293
01:10:03,880 --> 01:10:06,920
Speaker 1: uh my publisher sounds true. Our site the sex ad

1294
01:10:07,360 --> 01:10:09,840
Speaker 1: I love I love it, I love it well five

1295
01:10:09,960 --> 01:10:13,960
Speaker 1: years later, thank you for coming back. This was so

1296
01:10:14,160 --> 01:10:16,479
Speaker 1: much funny. Guys, we hope that you enjoyed this episode

1297
01:10:16,520 --> 01:10:19,720
Speaker 1: as well. Make sure to support us and to get

1298
01:10:19,760 --> 01:10:22,439
Speaker 1: bonus content, you head on over to Patreon. That is

1299
01:10:22,479 --> 01:10:29,599
Speaker 1: patreon dot com backslash Horrid Episodes the hundreds literal Little

1300
01:10:29,720 --> 01:10:33,560
Speaker 1: hundreds plus bts um and if you are one of

1301
01:10:33,680 --> 01:10:36,320
Speaker 1: our top tier patrons, once a month we do a

1302
01:10:36,560 --> 01:10:38,960
Speaker 1: town hall where you get to join us on zoom

1303
01:10:39,000 --> 01:10:41,120
Speaker 1: and be a part of an episode. So again, make

1304
01:10:41,120 --> 01:10:42,719
Speaker 1: sure you join us at patreon dot com back Slash

1305
01:10:42,760 --> 01:10:46,040
Speaker 1: horbor Decisions to check out what that sounds like. We're

1306
01:10:46,080 --> 01:10:48,160
Speaker 1: leaving you with a five minute bonus clip after this

1307
01:10:48,840 --> 01:10:51,760
Speaker 1: and this has been yet another episode of horrible Decisions pay.

1308
01:10:54,160 --> 01:10:56,200
Speaker 1: Isn't it crazy how we used to think going out

1309
01:10:56,240 --> 01:10:58,200
Speaker 1: of the country for stuff meant it was bad and

1310
01:10:58,320 --> 01:11:02,240
Speaker 1: now it is act in I got life bo and

1311
01:11:02,320 --> 01:11:04,920
Speaker 1: dr people. I mean, people think going out of the

1312
01:11:04,960 --> 01:11:08,320
Speaker 1: country for surgeries isn't bad, but it's literally like some

1313
01:11:08,600 --> 01:11:11,599
Speaker 1: of I don't like anyone I know that's even rich.

1314
01:11:11,760 --> 01:11:14,479
Speaker 1: Rich goes to Columbia for their d Like. I used

1315
01:11:14,520 --> 01:11:16,519
Speaker 1: to think it was the cheap way out, but it's

1316
01:11:16,960 --> 01:11:21,080
Speaker 1: literally definitely cheaper. I was not the cheap though, Bro,

1317
01:11:21,200 --> 01:11:24,439
Speaker 1: they're more skilled. Well, no, they're definitely skilled. I mean

1318
01:11:24,560 --> 01:11:26,600
Speaker 1: it depends on who you go to because there are

1319
01:11:26,720 --> 01:11:31,519
Speaker 1: people getting bad teeth done overseas. I was gonna go

1320
01:11:31,600 --> 01:11:35,080
Speaker 1: to her doctor, but I decided that I did not

1321
01:11:35,240 --> 01:11:39,280
Speaker 1: want my teeth fully shaven. Um. I'm really against like

1322
01:11:39,920 --> 01:11:42,960
Speaker 1: having little tiny teeth. So I found a doctor who

1323
01:11:43,000 --> 01:11:47,040
Speaker 1: does not shave down your teeth um drastically. He also

1324
01:11:47,120 --> 01:11:50,720
Speaker 1: doesn't do chicklets. Um. It's the same time frame, so

1325
01:11:51,439 --> 01:11:53,880
Speaker 1: I'm excited I may share that journey with you all

1326
01:11:53,920 --> 01:11:55,640
Speaker 1: when I go, so that you have can see the

1327
01:11:55,680 --> 01:11:59,360
Speaker 1: before and after and everything. But that's kind of my

1328
01:11:59,479 --> 01:12:02,760
Speaker 1: birthday to myself. Last year, I got the rolex that

1329
01:12:02,880 --> 01:12:05,840
Speaker 1: was my birthday gift. This year it'll be teeth um.

1330
01:12:06,960 --> 01:12:11,400
Speaker 1: But I just realized to the stress that comes with planning,

1331
01:12:12,160 --> 01:12:15,880
Speaker 1: and I just I don't even want my friends to stress.

1332
01:12:15,960 --> 01:12:20,280
Speaker 1: I don't want to stress even well yeah, and then like, uh,

1333
01:12:20,720 --> 01:12:24,439
Speaker 1: I just went to Crystal its birthday and it was amazing,

1334
01:12:24,520 --> 01:12:27,679
Speaker 1: got to see Doug. Everybody was Crystal, so I thought,

1335
01:12:27,680 --> 01:12:30,120
Speaker 1: I thought, you mean your Crystal was forty Oh no,

1336
01:12:30,320 --> 01:12:35,040
Speaker 1: Crystal from the read like not Crystal, but even like

1337
01:12:36,200 --> 01:12:39,240
Speaker 1: just knowing how many people travel in town and setting

1338
01:12:39,280 --> 01:12:41,320
Speaker 1: it up because it was the Sante's and it was

1339
01:12:41,400 --> 01:12:44,519
Speaker 1: just like, oh no, I don't want a birthday party.

1340
01:12:44,560 --> 01:12:48,599
Speaker 1: I'm good, Like just work, I'm good. I'm it's work,

1341
01:12:48,800 --> 01:12:51,559
Speaker 1: it's coordinating. I just I'm good. One of my friends

1342
01:12:51,680 --> 01:12:54,840
Speaker 1: did a shout out to Miko. He's actually a talent

1343
01:12:54,920 --> 01:12:57,920
Speaker 1: coordinator for FUSE. He set up like and I missed

1344
01:12:57,920 --> 01:13:00,360
Speaker 1: it because I was so sick last week after I

1345
01:13:00,439 --> 01:13:03,519
Speaker 1: got back. But he was basically like, did a crazy

1346
01:13:03,640 --> 01:13:05,720
Speaker 1: rich Asian he's Asian by the way, or crazy rich

1347
01:13:05,760 --> 01:13:08,719
Speaker 1: Asians theme party, got a sprinter and all this stuff

1348
01:13:08,760 --> 01:13:11,000
Speaker 1: for his friends, and he was like he told me

1349
01:13:11,280 --> 01:13:13,960
Speaker 1: to show up at dinner, and so when I couldn't

1350
01:13:13,960 --> 01:13:16,320
Speaker 1: make it, he was like, gillyot understand, Like this is

1351
01:13:16,360 --> 01:13:17,840
Speaker 1: like a really big party. I'm like, why didn't you

1352
01:13:17,880 --> 01:13:19,280
Speaker 1: tell me he was a big party He's like, I

1353
01:13:19,320 --> 01:13:22,280
Speaker 1: don't want people to feel overwhelmed. I just told everybody

1354
01:13:22,280 --> 01:13:23,920
Speaker 1: wear black and come to dinner. But like I decked

1355
01:13:23,960 --> 01:13:26,599
Speaker 1: it out, and I was like, I spent so much

1356
01:13:26,720 --> 01:13:29,439
Speaker 1: money to have my friends enjoy themselves because I really

1357
01:13:29,479 --> 01:13:31,800
Speaker 1: want my birthday to just be around the people, but

1358
01:13:31,880 --> 01:13:34,920
Speaker 1: I want to be around and bro when I tell you,

1359
01:13:35,960 --> 01:13:39,559
Speaker 1: when I thought about that, I was like, I remember

1360
01:13:39,600 --> 01:13:41,560
Speaker 1: paying for everybody for my thirtieth birthday and it was

1361
01:13:41,600 --> 01:13:44,280
Speaker 1: like a nine bill and it was Orlando, so that

1362
01:13:44,360 --> 01:13:46,479
Speaker 1: was kind of cheap because imagine the New York party

1363
01:13:46,520 --> 01:13:49,400
Speaker 1: with fifteen people. But like I actually I was mad

1364
01:13:49,479 --> 01:13:51,360
Speaker 1: I spent the money, but and I know people wanted

1365
01:13:51,400 --> 01:13:53,920
Speaker 1: to pay, but it kind of felt good to like

1366
01:13:54,080 --> 01:13:58,360
Speaker 1: treat my friends to like actually hosting something. Because if

1367
01:13:58,400 --> 01:14:01,400
Speaker 1: you throw a party at your house, you're buying the liquor,

1368
01:14:01,920 --> 01:14:04,679
Speaker 1: you're supplying most of the food, you're doing all that stuff,

1369
01:14:04,720 --> 01:14:07,439
Speaker 1: so you kind of do spend money. But that's I

1370
01:14:07,560 --> 01:14:10,519
Speaker 1: think the only good thing I would say now about

1371
01:14:10,640 --> 01:14:13,880
Speaker 1: making some extra bread is like that feels good because

1372
01:14:14,000 --> 01:14:16,160
Speaker 1: you don't want the stress of other people feeling like

1373
01:14:16,160 --> 01:14:18,200
Speaker 1: they're stressing on yellow ship, And then what about your

1374
01:14:18,240 --> 01:14:19,760
Speaker 1: broke friends. I don't know if you have broke friends,

1375
01:14:19,760 --> 01:14:21,280
Speaker 1: but I got some broke friends, and I want them

1376
01:14:21,360 --> 01:14:24,519
Speaker 1: niggas to freak out. It's just a lot. It's crazy

1377
01:14:24,520 --> 01:14:28,639
Speaker 1: because I know I'm gonna sound like a dud because

1378
01:14:28,640 --> 01:14:30,920
Speaker 1: I know last week or a couple of weeks ago,

1379
01:14:30,960 --> 01:14:33,920
Speaker 1: I talked about how I was shallow and had certain

1380
01:14:33,960 --> 01:14:36,920
Speaker 1: friends that I am I didn't invite out. I feel

1381
01:14:37,160 --> 01:14:39,960
Speaker 1: so blessed and I don't know if I just distanced

1382
01:14:40,000 --> 01:14:44,800
Speaker 1: myself or it was just organic. And I brag about

1383
01:14:44,840 --> 01:14:47,000
Speaker 1: my friends so much. I have no broke friends. Like

1384
01:14:47,800 --> 01:14:50,400
Speaker 1: when I go out with my friends, bro would be fighting,

1385
01:14:50,880 --> 01:14:54,080
Speaker 1: so who's putting their card down? And that's so not

1386
01:14:54,360 --> 01:14:56,320
Speaker 1: like it's a great feeling to go out with people

1387
01:14:56,360 --> 01:14:58,400
Speaker 1: and know that you can do what you want. I

1388
01:14:58,520 --> 01:15:00,200
Speaker 1: love it. But then also that's why I be trying

1389
01:15:00,240 --> 01:15:02,200
Speaker 1: to chill them going out to l A because every

1390
01:15:02,240 --> 01:15:03,519
Speaker 1: time I go out to l A, I'll go out

1391
01:15:03,560 --> 01:15:05,800
Speaker 1: with my home girls and all my home girls because

1392
01:15:05,840 --> 01:15:09,000
Speaker 1: everybody got money and they eat good. Bitch we our billy.

1393
01:15:09,040 --> 01:15:12,080
Speaker 1: Katana has never been under twelve and would be like four,

1394
01:15:12,439 --> 01:15:15,680
Speaker 1: So I just ate there. Last week it was me

1395
01:15:16,360 --> 01:15:20,560
Speaker 1: Alex and an employee. That's what I'm saying, is the

1396
01:15:20,600 --> 01:15:22,560
Speaker 1: scow when the skill was just nine dollars, how do

1397
01:15:22,640 --> 01:15:25,479
Speaker 1: we get there? I don't not in skills be twenty two.

1398
01:15:25,600 --> 01:15:26,479
Speaker 1: That's why I don't know what you