WEBVTT - "I COMMITTED MARRIAGE FRAUD" 0:00:00.240 --> 0:00:07.200 Scotty. First, let's go Scotty. It says here that you 0:00:07.280 --> 0:00:13.080 have been actively committing marriage fraud for money, and you've 0:00:13.119 --> 0:00:16.079 been doing it for a year now, and you are 0:00:16.120 --> 0:00:19.120 not worried in the slightest that you will get caught. 0:00:19.520 --> 0:00:24.680 What exactly is marriage fraud? 0:00:28.280 --> 0:00:28.360 So? 0:00:28.560 --> 0:00:36.199 Geck, in my job, you're married, you get paid significantly 0:00:36.240 --> 0:00:41.040 more money. Really, you get uh yeah, more than double. 0:00:41.479 --> 0:00:46.080 So me and one of my buddies from oh I've 0:00:46.080 --> 0:00:48.840 known for a very very long time since like kindergarten, 0:00:48.960 --> 0:00:53.360 so over a decade, decided to just get married. And 0:00:53.400 --> 0:00:55.480 now I make a bunch of money and I buy 0:00:55.560 --> 0:00:58.600 him thinks sometimes and it all works out good for. 0:00:58.560 --> 0:00:59.160 The both of us. 0:01:00.240 --> 0:01:04.160 Now, when you say you decided to get married, what 0:01:04.400 --> 0:01:08.399 is the fraud element of this? Are you and your 0:01:08.440 --> 0:01:09.679 buddy legally married? 0:01:12.240 --> 0:01:12.680 We are? 0:01:13.520 --> 0:01:17.119 Yeah, Well, Scotty, I I have news for you. If 0:01:17.120 --> 0:01:19.840 you and your buddy are legally married, there is no 0:01:19.959 --> 0:01:21.560 fraud being taken place. 0:01:24.520 --> 0:01:26.440 I guess that's true, but it could still get me 0:01:26.480 --> 0:01:27.120 in trouble. 0:01:27.920 --> 0:01:29.120 Why would that get you in trouble? 0:01:32.160 --> 0:01:37.800 Well, if they they found out at work then that 0:01:37.959 --> 0:01:43.039 I just married to get paid, then I could definitely get. 0:01:42.880 --> 0:01:43.560 In some trouble. 0:01:44.560 --> 0:01:46.600 That doesn't make a lot of sense to me, because, okay, 0:01:46.600 --> 0:01:49.600 what's the whole point of Well, first of all, what 0:01:49.600 --> 0:01:51.840 what job do you work where they pay you double 0:01:51.880 --> 0:01:53.920 for getting married? I haven't heard of that before. I 0:01:53.960 --> 0:01:55.880 know that there's like tax benefits or whatever, but I 0:01:55.920 --> 0:01:58.400 haven't I've never heard of a job paying you extra 0:01:58.480 --> 0:01:58.800 for that. 0:02:01.040 --> 0:02:03.680 It's not necessarily double. So I'm in the military, and 0:02:03.720 --> 0:02:07.480 they give you an allowance for housing that house your spouse, 0:02:07.960 --> 0:02:10.960 and then they give you some other like allowance and 0:02:11.000 --> 0:02:12.560 stuff if you are married. 0:02:13.840 --> 0:02:21.840 Okay, well, so let's think about the core purpose of 0:02:21.919 --> 0:02:25.160 this program that they have or whatever it is, where 0:02:25.200 --> 0:02:30.680 they give you money to give to the person that 0:02:30.680 --> 0:02:35.080 you're married to. You said up front that you'd buy 0:02:35.240 --> 0:02:38.680 nice things for your husband. 0:02:40.919 --> 0:02:41.880 Yeah, that's true. 0:02:42.520 --> 0:02:45.800 Okay, So I mean that's what that's what the money's for. 0:02:45.840 --> 0:02:48.400 The money's for you to buy nice things for your spouse, 0:02:48.880 --> 0:02:51.240 whom you're legally married to. I I I don't you 0:02:51.240 --> 0:02:53.799 know what I want to get to the point. What 0:02:53.880 --> 0:02:56.520 the point I'm trying to get to is where are 0:02:56.600 --> 0:03:00.320 you committing fraud? Here? You married this guy and now 0:03:00.360 --> 0:03:04.680 you're entitled to the benefits that your job is offering 0:03:05.520 --> 0:03:06.360 to married people. 0:03:09.639 --> 0:03:11.720 You know, That's that's an argument that I've heard some 0:03:11.800 --> 0:03:14.600 people make too, because like at work, I have to 0:03:14.680 --> 0:03:19.080 kind of go around the fact that I'm not gay 0:03:19.200 --> 0:03:22.800 because when I tell people, like especially that have rank, 0:03:22.919 --> 0:03:26.120 they like ask me questions about my husband and stuff, 0:03:26.200 --> 0:03:29.280 and you know, I have to. I've definitely told quite 0:03:29.320 --> 0:03:32.440 a few people that I'm bisexual. But like, do I 0:03:32.480 --> 0:03:35.960 really have to do that? Because nowhere does it say 0:03:36.000 --> 0:03:41.160 that I can't get married for a particular reason, Like. 0:03:41.320 --> 0:03:43.200 You don't have to be gay to get married to 0:03:43.240 --> 0:03:46.000 a man. You, I mean, you did it. You're not 0:03:46.120 --> 0:03:48.280 gay and you're to a man. 0:03:51.520 --> 0:03:52.400 It feels nice too. 0:03:52.800 --> 0:03:53.360 I love him. 0:03:53.400 --> 0:03:55.160 Also, I love my husband a lot. 0:03:57.840 --> 0:04:01.320 I again, you love him again? Not not also not 0:04:01.360 --> 0:04:04.720 a prerequisite for getting married. But Scotty, why do you 0:04:04.760 --> 0:04:06.280 feel as though you're committing fraud here? 0:04:10.520 --> 0:04:13.440 Maybe because it's like, well, I think I don't actually 0:04:13.480 --> 0:04:15.800 think it's fraud. I think that's kind of just like 0:04:15.880 --> 0:04:18.560 a a joke that I like to make about it. 0:04:18.680 --> 0:04:23.560 But in some sense, I guess, maybe just from what 0:04:23.640 --> 0:04:25.479 people at work have told me, the kind of like 0:04:26.080 --> 0:04:28.400 shame you for doing that? Well not some people. Some 0:04:28.400 --> 0:04:30.880 people think it's hilarious and a great idea, but other 0:04:30.920 --> 0:04:35.479 people think it's a terrible thing. Do you think you're 0:04:35.960 --> 0:04:38.760 bringing off the army feeling the government? 0:04:41.640 --> 0:04:44.719 Would you say, do you feel like it's a terrible 0:04:44.760 --> 0:04:46.200 thing and that you're ripping off the government? 0:04:50.320 --> 0:04:52.039 No, I think it's a great thing. I work my 0:04:52.080 --> 0:04:55.200 ass off and you know that that is what it is. 0:04:55.240 --> 0:04:56.360 I take my job seriously. 0:04:57.640 --> 0:05:01.040 And what does your husband and do? What does he 0:05:01.160 --> 0:05:04.440 sort of think about all this? How did he react 0:05:04.480 --> 0:05:06.160 to when you first pitched him the idea? 0:05:09.480 --> 0:05:13.200 We thought he was joking, and I kind of like 0:05:13.200 --> 0:05:17.120 pulled them the details of it and told him like 0:05:17.160 --> 0:05:19.040 the benefits you know he gets, like healthcare and stuff, 0:05:20.279 --> 0:05:23.360 and then he was on board pretty much right away. 0:05:25.520 --> 0:05:27.679 So my final question, I think we both. 0:05:27.520 --> 0:05:33.000 Time no, go ahead, Oh, I was kind of going 0:05:33.080 --> 0:05:35.719 to like hear the conversation a little bit different directions. 0:05:36.040 --> 0:05:38.680 I think both of us kind of think that the 0:05:38.760 --> 0:05:42.400 idea of marriage is not like stupid, but we don't 0:05:42.760 --> 0:05:45.200 either one of us really even agree with traditional marriage. 0:05:47.400 --> 0:05:53.280 So you think it's. 0:05:53.760 --> 0:05:59.080 So you are adverse to the idea of getting married 0:05:59.360 --> 0:06:03.880 for the purposes of tradition at some point in your life. 0:06:07.200 --> 0:06:07.680 Uh. Yeah. 0:06:07.880 --> 0:06:11.160 I feel like, like, if you love somebody and that's 0:06:11.160 --> 0:06:12.800 who you want to spend the rest of your life with, 0:06:12.920 --> 0:06:16.200 why do you have to sign a paper that like 0:06:16.320 --> 0:06:18.440 binds you to that, you know, just do that just 0:06:18.560 --> 0:06:19.960 in the rest of your life with them, love them. 0:06:20.120 --> 0:06:20.920 Do you want to have kids? 0:06:20.960 --> 0:06:21.320 Do that? 0:06:23.400 --> 0:06:23.560 Well? 0:06:23.600 --> 0:06:26.720 So my final question is, Okay, you've been married to 0:06:27.120 --> 0:06:30.039 you you say you've been married to your husband for 0:06:30.080 --> 0:06:32.800 about a year. How long do you anticipate this marriage 0:06:32.839 --> 0:06:35.120 will last? Do you guys see a divorce sometime in 0:06:35.160 --> 0:06:36.640 the future or will you be married forever? 0:06:40.520 --> 0:06:45.360 Uh? Probably just when I get out of the military. 0:06:45.480 --> 0:06:49.080 We'll just file for divorce and then that'll be that. 0:06:51.680 --> 0:06:53.560 Do you think that it will upset your husband when 0:06:53.560 --> 0:06:55.599 you eventually divorce him. Do you think he enjoys being 0:06:55.600 --> 0:06:59.520 married to you and would be devastated by the idea 0:06:59.520 --> 0:07:00.000 of a divorce. 0:07:03.360 --> 0:07:06.440 No, I don't think so, beautiful. 0:07:06.880 --> 0:07:08.560 Thank you very much for calling Scotty. 0:07:10.560 --> 0:07:11.600 All right bye low. 0:07:19.320 --> 0:07:25.840 Huh. You know, honestly, the way that he put all 0:07:25.880 --> 0:07:32.600 of that, like he just made it sound really easy, 0:07:33.760 --> 0:07:35.840 which makes sense. I mean, theoretically, you should be able 0:07:35.880 --> 0:07:38.080 to marry a stranger. Pretty fat. I mean, there's no 0:07:40.240 --> 0:07:49.120 there's no downside to it. I guess he just made 0:07:49.160 --> 0:07:50.040 it sound so easy. 0:07:52.600 --> 0:07:52.800 Chat. 0:07:52.840 --> 0:07:55.280 Does anyone want to get married for like a day, 0:07:56.360 --> 0:07:59.080 just for fun, just to have a wedding, just because 0:07:59.080 --> 0:08:01.760 it would be nice? Hi? Dustin? 0:08:04.120 --> 0:08:05.920 Hello? How are you? 0:08:05.960 --> 0:08:11.400 Dustin? Hello, Dustin, it's me. It's the gag. 0:08:12.640 --> 0:08:13.480 Oh ship. 0:08:15.040 --> 0:08:15.320 Wow. 0:08:15.840 --> 0:08:17.000 I was not expecting that. 0:08:17.960 --> 0:08:19.720 What's up? Man? Uh? 0:08:20.200 --> 0:08:24.960 What's up? Nothing much? I'm chilling. It's uh, it's an evening. 0:08:26.160 --> 0:08:27.440 What's going on with you? Dustin? 0:08:27.480 --> 0:08:27.840 Yeah? 0:08:27.920 --> 0:08:32.920 Yeah, sorry, sorry, yeah, sorry for the you know, redundant 0:08:32.960 --> 0:08:34.520 question that you probably get every time. 0:08:36.600 --> 0:08:39.680 You owe me nothing. You you have no reason to 0:08:39.720 --> 0:08:42.760 apologize for me just yet. Well, Dustin, listen, it's us 0:08:42.800 --> 0:08:45.160 here that you want to know whether or not you 0:08:45.200 --> 0:08:47.760 should make amends with your dad. 0:08:49.800 --> 0:08:50.040 Yeah? 0:08:50.160 --> 0:08:53.240 Pretty much Like I mean, there's been a long you know, 0:08:53.280 --> 0:08:57.120 I'm forty, Well, i'll be I'll be forty in. 0:08:57.120 --> 0:09:03.239 Me m my dad's like seventy five or seventy six. 0:09:03.720 --> 0:09:05.800 And he's like screwed me over a lot in my 0:09:05.840 --> 0:09:13.000 life and I've tried to make amends with him throughout 0:09:13.040 --> 0:09:16.640 the years, and he just keeps screwing it up and 0:09:16.720 --> 0:09:17.480 tissing me off. 0:09:18.240 --> 0:09:19.840 How has he screwed you making me. 0:09:19.760 --> 0:09:21.240 Not want to be in his life? 0:09:23.600 --> 0:09:27.320 Well, I mean you only start to okay, like I mean, 0:09:27.400 --> 0:09:31.320 I just say, well, I could go all the way 0:09:31.360 --> 0:09:35.920 back to when I was a kid, or you know, 0:09:36.080 --> 0:09:38.800 or like well okay, yeah, I'll trying to make a 0:09:38.800 --> 0:09:39.080 short and. 0:09:39.080 --> 0:09:40.559 Sweet sure. 0:09:42.440 --> 0:09:43.840 I was gonna. Uh. 0:09:44.040 --> 0:09:45.560 I was putting a foster home when I was seven 0:09:45.640 --> 0:09:48.800 years old because my dad knocks me unconscious and put 0:09:48.840 --> 0:09:51.880 like a golf both sides not on my forehead because 0:09:52.080 --> 0:09:55.200 I would not listen to him. It took he told 0:09:55.240 --> 0:09:58.400 me three times and not going into the bathroom. My 0:09:58.679 --> 0:10:02.120 sister was five years old than me, while she was 0:10:02.120 --> 0:10:05.200 taking a shower and I was drawing on the mirror 0:10:05.600 --> 0:10:07.440 and he, you know, he told me three times not 0:10:07.480 --> 0:10:08.320 to go in the bathroom. 0:10:08.600 --> 0:10:09.840 He knock unconscious. 0:10:10.080 --> 0:10:11.880 I was in a fosterone for any for like a 0:10:11.960 --> 0:10:15.079 year and a half or so, and then moved back 0:10:15.080 --> 0:10:16.880 in with him after that, and you know, and then 0:10:17.440 --> 0:10:21.240 suffered you know, abuse, physical abuse and all that stuff became, 0:10:21.400 --> 0:10:24.920 you know, moved out because when I was twelve eleven twelve, 0:10:25.280 --> 0:10:28.120 like left the house like I was homeless living on 0:10:28.120 --> 0:10:30.199 the streets because I was afraid to go home. 0:10:31.040 --> 0:10:32.839 You were you were homeless living on the street at. 0:10:32.760 --> 0:10:37.800 Twenty Yeah, yeah, because I was afraid to go home, 0:10:37.920 --> 0:10:43.720 like you know, like I yeah, you know, and yeah that's. 0:10:43.600 --> 0:10:44.360 This is all. 0:10:44.800 --> 0:10:48.000 Yeah, like I can give you specific city care, you know, 0:10:48.120 --> 0:10:51.760 Like like I like slept in between my dad's house 0:10:51.800 --> 0:10:52.680 and my neighbor's house. 0:10:52.720 --> 0:10:53.839 It was like this little nook. 0:10:54.520 --> 0:10:58.280 And it was one time where my dog's stable smelled me, 0:10:59.440 --> 0:11:02.600 like because like you know, you know, she recognized my smell, 0:11:02.640 --> 0:11:05.520 and she started barking at like the corner of the 0:11:05.600 --> 0:11:10.160 floor because she could smell me, and she started barking 0:11:10.280 --> 0:11:12.160 just at the floor, and my dad kind of just 0:11:12.200 --> 0:11:14.720 got this, like, what the hell, why does the sable? 0:11:14.760 --> 0:11:15.480 Why is our dog? 0:11:15.520 --> 0:11:17.720 Why does the dog keep barking to this one little spot? 0:11:19.559 --> 0:11:20.719 Okay? And I'm like shut up. 0:11:21.520 --> 0:11:24.439 So I was trying to sleep and because I was 0:11:24.520 --> 0:11:26.960 terrified to get home because it's you know, some stupid 0:11:27.040 --> 0:11:29.840 something people that I did at school. But I would 0:11:29.880 --> 0:11:31.400 have got the ship kicked out of me for it, 0:11:31.960 --> 0:11:37.720 you know, if I were went home. So you know, 0:11:37.760 --> 0:11:41.160 I lived with my mom for a while until I 0:11:41.200 --> 0:11:43.839 was you know, seventeen eighteen, which you know, those years 0:11:43.840 --> 0:11:50.719 weren't great. Mom drug addict, my dad alcoholic, So make 0:11:50.800 --> 0:11:55.800 sure a great dynamic, you know. I you know, I 0:11:55.800 --> 0:11:58.280 get hit eighteen and that you know, the one thing 0:11:58.320 --> 0:12:01.400 I did like appreciated my dad is that he like 0:12:01.600 --> 0:12:03.559 he tried to like put a foot in my a, 0:12:05.120 --> 0:12:08.040 get me going, but he just went about it the 0:12:08.080 --> 0:12:08.680 wrong way. 0:12:09.600 --> 0:12:12.920 You know. So you said he tried too hard. 0:12:13.040 --> 0:12:13.920 He tried too hard. 0:12:14.080 --> 0:12:16.840 Yeah, yeah, So you're telling me you have an appreciation 0:12:17.000 --> 0:12:20.760 for the fact that your dad, uh was like you know, 0:12:21.800 --> 0:12:24.040 it sounds like, I mean just from like what you've 0:12:24.120 --> 0:12:26.520 just told me now that you feel as though you 0:12:27.320 --> 0:12:31.559 understand his intentions with all of this, like yeah, but 0:12:32.120 --> 0:12:33.360 he met well, but that he just did it in 0:12:33.440 --> 0:12:34.680 a fucking terrible way. 0:12:36.840 --> 0:12:41.240 Yeah yeah, yeah, And and and but when when I, 0:12:41.559 --> 0:12:45.040 you know, turned eighteen, I moved to Louisiana with him. 0:12:45.040 --> 0:12:49.240 He was Michelle Matte Louisiana to Louisiana with him, and 0:12:49.240 --> 0:12:51.520 I lived with him, and you know the first day 0:12:51.559 --> 0:12:55.240 I was there, I got you know, like literally the 0:12:55.240 --> 0:12:57.120 first day I was there, I would and apply to windows. 0:12:57.280 --> 0:13:00.000 He got a job, you know, he was doing good. 0:13:00.080 --> 0:13:02.120 I was super proud of me. I was happy because 0:13:02.120 --> 0:13:04.240 my dad was proud of me, you know, my dad, 0:13:04.840 --> 0:13:05.000 you know. 0:13:05.080 --> 0:13:09.040 And I still respected him, you know, fucked up. 0:13:08.960 --> 0:13:11.080 As that is, you know, and because he's my dad, 0:13:11.160 --> 0:13:15.199 you know. And and I was, you know, like and 0:13:16.000 --> 0:13:19.280 got another job, was working, was working in when Dixie, 0:13:19.880 --> 0:13:22.720 you know, stocking groceries. Got another job at. 0:13:22.600 --> 0:13:24.520 A mill shop, learning how to weld. 0:13:25.360 --> 0:13:28.080 You know, working two jobs, working almost eighty hours a week, 0:13:28.480 --> 0:13:31.360 and I was going to welding school. I was like 0:13:31.840 --> 0:13:34.000 I turned into like a workahol. Like I went from like, 0:13:34.280 --> 0:13:36.959 you know, this lazy kid, and then I went moved 0:13:37.000 --> 0:13:38.800 in over dad. And that was because my dad was 0:13:38.800 --> 0:13:41.079 pushing me to do all this stuff. And he wasn't 0:13:41.120 --> 0:13:43.240 being an ass. He wasn't being like he's a shit 0:13:43.400 --> 0:13:47.839 about it at first. And then after I saved up 0:13:47.920 --> 0:13:51.000 like seven thousand dollars in the bank when I was eighteen, 0:13:52.720 --> 0:13:55.080 you know, my dad just kind of like he quit 0:13:55.160 --> 0:13:59.320 his job because he was like, oh, my son's got 0:13:59.320 --> 0:14:01.280 like seven grands to the bank. I can just like, 0:14:01.520 --> 0:14:07.720 you know, mooch off of him. And yeah, and and 0:14:07.800 --> 0:14:11.560 he doesn't he doesn't acknowledge that. And and I was 0:14:12.200 --> 0:14:15.480 pretty weak too at that time because my dad, like 0:14:15.600 --> 0:14:18.640 I was buying my dad's liquor, ya you know, I 0:14:18.679 --> 0:14:21.360 was supporting his habit. Yeah, you know, it's. 0:14:21.200 --> 0:14:21.920 Paying his rent. 0:14:22.240 --> 0:14:25.360 Like he just quit his job and became like basically 0:14:25.400 --> 0:14:28.520 just a full time drunk. Yeah, and like you know, 0:14:28.600 --> 0:14:31.600 we've gotten fights and stuff, you know, and I was 0:14:31.640 --> 0:14:34.280 just like two weeks I was, you know, you know, 0:14:34.280 --> 0:14:37.360 it was two weeks to tell him no until the 0:14:37.360 --> 0:14:42.360 time I left. And when I did finally leave, you know, 0:14:42.400 --> 0:14:45.600 it was I took the eaty way out, you know, 0:14:45.640 --> 0:14:46.520 That's what he told me. 0:14:47.400 --> 0:14:51.160 I took the easy way out. I left. I went back. 0:14:52.800 --> 0:14:57.280 Yeah, how long? How long? How long did you stay? 0:14:57.560 --> 0:14:59.440 And how long were you were you supporting him for? 0:14:59.520 --> 0:15:01.680 You said from the age of eighteen to two about what 0:15:01.800 --> 0:15:03.840 age six. 0:15:03.720 --> 0:15:04.880 To four months? 0:15:04.960 --> 0:15:07.360 You know, it's all kind of blurry, okay, and so 0:15:07.800 --> 0:15:14.120 and so I interrupt you about but why did why 0:15:14.160 --> 0:15:17.040 why was it considered by you or by him to 0:15:17.080 --> 0:15:18.400 be the easy way out? 0:15:18.960 --> 0:15:22.280 Because my dad would push me to do you know, 0:15:22.400 --> 0:15:24.640 to be like, you know, to do what I need. 0:15:24.800 --> 0:15:27.960 Like my dad he always he was a pusher, you know, 0:15:28.040 --> 0:15:30.640 he like, like that's one thing I do is thank 0:15:30.760 --> 0:15:31.400 my dad. 0:15:31.240 --> 0:15:34.920 For is my work. As a sure, I've always. 0:15:34.560 --> 0:15:38.920 Been like hard worker, you know, like I like ever 0:15:38.960 --> 0:15:42.400 since I've been like twelve. You're like, I was incarcerated 0:15:42.400 --> 0:15:46.840 for like six months when I was sixteen for breaking 0:15:46.920 --> 0:15:49.880 in the house, and I was like one of the 0:15:49.920 --> 0:15:54.280 most respected people there among the staff because of how 0:15:54.320 --> 0:15:59.080 hard of a worker I was. And you know, and 0:15:59.160 --> 0:16:01.880 he just like every job that I've ever had, Like 0:16:02.080 --> 0:16:04.080 for my first job, like you know, from when I 0:16:04.120 --> 0:16:06.680 got out of that boot camp, I got a job 0:16:06.720 --> 0:16:09.160 at a brick mason crew, you know, and I was like, 0:16:09.560 --> 0:16:13.120 you know, highly respected among the you know, the thirty 0:16:13.200 --> 0:16:14.160 forty year old men. 0:16:14.560 --> 0:16:19.200 Because so so okay, So so I went back back 0:16:19.200 --> 0:16:24.200 to start of the timeline here. So you're eighteen, Yeah, dad, 0:16:24.240 --> 0:16:27.600 quitch is your dad quits his job. You're supporting him, 0:16:28.080 --> 0:16:32.960 and then you decide I bounce. You decide to bounce, 0:16:33.040 --> 0:16:34.480 and then where do you Where do you go after bounce? 0:16:36.160 --> 0:16:38.360 I go back home with my mom who's living in 0:16:38.440 --> 0:16:40.360 the crackhouse with a crackhead boyfriend. 0:16:41.000 --> 0:16:43.320 Yeah, And I lived there. 0:16:43.160 --> 0:16:46.080 For you know for a while, until I like, you know, 0:16:46.480 --> 0:16:49.800 tell a friend of mine, you know, tells him he 0:16:49.840 --> 0:16:53.000 needs a roommate. And then, you know, a good job 0:16:53.080 --> 0:16:55.800 doing free work. And I'm eighteen, you know, I'm nineteen 0:16:56.120 --> 0:16:59.720 twenty at this time, you know, doing you know, we're 0:16:59.760 --> 0:17:03.520 doing free work. But uh, I mean we can I 0:17:03.520 --> 0:17:05.800 think we can fast forward to to like today. 0:17:06.520 --> 0:17:08.159 Sure, let's fast forward to today. 0:17:08.240 --> 0:17:13.120 So okay, from that time, from that time to now, 0:17:13.359 --> 0:17:16.480 me and him didn't really have much contact. Okay, you know, 0:17:16.600 --> 0:17:19.199 like right now and then we talk, but other than that, 0:17:19.600 --> 0:17:24.360 really niche contact, you know, until the hurricane the last 0:17:24.440 --> 0:17:27.680 hurricane the hit like a few months ago. 0:17:28.320 --> 0:17:29.119 Actually. 0:17:31.960 --> 0:17:33.920 The last hurricane, last hurricane that hit where. 0:17:35.680 --> 0:17:36.560 In Louisiana. 0:17:36.960 --> 0:17:41.600 Okay, so the hurricane hits Louisia, then did he reach out? 0:17:41.600 --> 0:17:45.560 I drove, Well, no, Well, we were we were kind 0:17:45.600 --> 0:17:48.000 of talking. We were kind of like, you know, how 0:17:48.040 --> 0:17:51.240 did we have a report going? We were being cordial 0:17:51.320 --> 0:17:53.400 to each other, you know, and trying to get back 0:17:53.400 --> 0:17:56.800 in our good graces, you know. And and I, you know, 0:17:57.160 --> 0:17:59.800 I actually and I found out that he didn't have 0:17:59.800 --> 0:18:04.560 any power when the hurricane, you know, hit, and so 0:18:04.680 --> 0:18:07.000 I drove to Louisiana and I went and picked him 0:18:07.080 --> 0:18:09.480 up and brought him to my house. You know, so 0:18:09.560 --> 0:18:13.840 he wasn't there in Louisiana without any power. And this 0:18:13.920 --> 0:18:16.360 is like twenty twenty one. The hurricane, Yeah, the hurricane 0:18:16.400 --> 0:18:17.919 you know there was I can't remember the name of it. 0:18:20.000 --> 0:18:21.199 And you know, I brought him back here. 0:18:21.240 --> 0:18:23.119 He stayed with me for a you know, for like 0:18:24.080 --> 0:18:25.800 a week and a half, two weeks. 0:18:26.080 --> 0:18:27.800 And how was that week? And happen two weeks? 0:18:29.240 --> 0:18:29.840 Oh with Hill? 0:18:31.560 --> 0:18:35.040 Yeah, Yeah, all I did was brag about how great 0:18:35.080 --> 0:18:37.960 he was, you know, so like you know, he's like 0:18:38.000 --> 0:18:42.280 to my to my my girlfriend, you know, well, you know, 0:18:42.400 --> 0:18:43.160 wife or whatever. 0:18:43.840 --> 0:18:47.000 He did together for almost ten years he was got married. 0:18:48.400 --> 0:18:50.440 But yeah, he just you know, like she would tell me, 0:18:51.080 --> 0:18:53.080 like how all he did like while I was gone 0:18:53.160 --> 0:18:55.639 is talk about how you know, great of a person 0:18:55.680 --> 0:18:59.240 he was, and you know it was. Yeah, it was 0:18:59.240 --> 0:19:02.520 pretty unbearable, you know, because he tried to lecture me 0:19:02.600 --> 0:19:04.480 and stuff, and we got in a couple of arguments. 0:19:05.720 --> 0:19:06.720 Yeah, because he's. 0:19:06.960 --> 0:19:09.200 Yeah, he tried to lecture Now he's like a seventy 0:19:09.200 --> 0:19:10.000 five year old man. 0:19:11.359 --> 0:19:13.440 It says. It says that you're not sure if you 0:19:13.440 --> 0:19:16.880 should try to make amends with him before he died. 0:19:17.240 --> 0:19:19.280 I haven't even gotten to the part where I've really 0:19:19.280 --> 0:19:21.120 gotten pissed off at him, because there was. 0:19:21.080 --> 0:19:21.880 Like, what what what? 0:19:21.880 --> 0:19:22.160 What? 0:19:22.160 --> 0:19:22.720 What was it that. 0:19:25.440 --> 0:19:27.760 I broke my back about six months ago? 0:19:28.320 --> 0:19:31.520 Yeah, And I'm like, and I my my career as 0:19:31.520 --> 0:19:34.439 a welder has kind of ended. And now I'm like, 0:19:34.600 --> 0:19:37.800 now I'm an uber driver and I'm doing okay. 0:19:38.480 --> 0:19:40.880 You know, I'm not home, you know, like I'm doing 0:19:40.880 --> 0:19:41.240 all right. 0:19:41.960 --> 0:19:45.480 But my dad knew I was struggling. He and I 0:19:45.480 --> 0:19:47.480 guess he had a little bit of extra money and 0:19:47.520 --> 0:19:50.280 he knew I needed tire. He bought me some tires 0:19:51.040 --> 0:19:53.639 when he got went back to Louisiana. When he he 0:19:53.680 --> 0:19:57.600 went back to Louisiana, and he wired me some money 0:19:57.680 --> 0:20:01.040 to buy some tires, and and he told me he 0:20:01.080 --> 0:20:04.359 wanted proof. He wanted me to take a picture of 0:20:04.440 --> 0:20:09.760 the receipt to prove that I bought these tires. And 0:20:09.800 --> 0:20:12.720 I told her, I was like, fuck you. You know, 0:20:13.040 --> 0:20:16.679 you robbed me. You know, I like, I paid for 0:20:16.800 --> 0:20:19.919 you when I was eighteen years old, when I like, 0:20:20.040 --> 0:20:22.679 we had an agreement when I was a kid that 0:20:22.800 --> 0:20:26.280 I could come live with you and you would help me, 0:20:26.560 --> 0:20:31.800 you know, And now you're polnician on me because you know, 0:20:31.960 --> 0:20:33.720 I'm you know, I need a little help. And I 0:20:33.720 --> 0:20:37.879 didn't even ask for the money he offered it. I 0:20:37.880 --> 0:20:40.320 would not I would not have asked for the help. 0:20:40.920 --> 0:20:42.960 He offered the money. So I'm not gonna you know, 0:20:43.040 --> 0:20:45.399 I needed it. I'm not going to tell him no. 0:20:47.000 --> 0:20:51.520 So I, you know, I accepted the money. And then, 0:20:51.560 --> 0:20:53.879 oh and then I didn't even go to the tire 0:20:53.920 --> 0:20:56.159 place that he wanted me to go to. He wanted 0:20:56.160 --> 0:20:59.520 me to go to Firestone and I could get the 0:20:59.560 --> 0:21:03.480 same time as at Walmart for like twenty to thirty 0:21:03.520 --> 0:21:07.560 dollars cheaper and pay left labor, thank him. And I'm 0:21:07.560 --> 0:21:12.399 probably getting too specifically, but yeah, but uh, but he 0:21:12.480 --> 0:21:15.800 got pissed at that, and he went off on me 0:21:16.840 --> 0:21:20.280 for doing it, and he and and all, you know, 0:21:20.640 --> 0:21:22.720 for yeah, for not going to. 0:21:22.320 --> 0:21:23.840 I can ask how long ago. I can ask how 0:21:23.880 --> 0:21:25.080 long ago? How recently this was? 0:21:26.560 --> 0:21:28.080 Oh, this is a few months, this is a few 0:21:28.119 --> 0:21:28.560 months ago. 0:21:29.000 --> 0:21:32.359 There was a few months, three months ago. So sost 0:21:32.760 --> 0:21:37.760 to fast forward to fast forward to today. You're talking 0:21:37.800 --> 0:21:41.120 about whether or not you want to make amends with him. 0:21:41.600 --> 0:21:46.800 At least that's what you told the call screen there. Yeah, 0:21:46.960 --> 0:21:50.200 is there anything in particular that happened in the last 0:21:50.359 --> 0:21:53.159 Like I don't know a week or or recently what 0:21:53.359 --> 0:21:56.720 that made you sort of I don't know. I don't 0:21:56.760 --> 0:22:00.679 know if there's like a a thing that made you 0:22:00.720 --> 0:22:04.840 come to this realization of like I either need to 0:22:04.880 --> 0:22:08.199 make amends with him or not, you know what I mean? Like, 0:22:08.240 --> 0:22:10.200 is there anything like seventy five? 0:22:10.280 --> 0:22:13.800 He's like seventy five? He's you know, he's he's about 0:22:13.800 --> 0:22:16.280 to kick the bucket, sure, you know, and he and 0:22:16.320 --> 0:22:21.920 he's a miserable, lonely old man. Yeah, because he's he's 0:22:21.920 --> 0:22:26.080 pushed everybody away from him and I'm really like the 0:22:26.119 --> 0:22:29.840 only person that he really has left, you know, And 0:22:30.160 --> 0:22:33.000 I kind of feel bad, you know, like I feel 0:22:33.000 --> 0:22:36.280 like I should I shouldn't be ignoring him because he's 0:22:36.280 --> 0:22:40.080 been calling me, and I feel I feel bad for 0:22:40.160 --> 0:22:41.760 ignoring him. But do you. 0:22:42.200 --> 0:22:47.639 Feel like throughout my life, do you feel like do 0:22:47.640 --> 0:22:51.720 you feel like making amends with him would make because 0:22:52.560 --> 0:22:54.720 you know, I know that, like you know, you feel 0:22:54.760 --> 0:22:58.199 bad because again, he has his own like you know, 0:22:58.400 --> 0:23:00.600 bullshit that he's dealing with and you're the only one 0:23:00.640 --> 0:23:03.240 he has. But like, do you feel like making amends 0:23:03.280 --> 0:23:05.480 with him would make you feel better. 0:23:08.119 --> 0:23:13.440 A little bit. Yeah, Like, but I really I'm still 0:23:13.440 --> 0:23:17.119 gonna be pissed at him, you know, I'm you know, like, 0:23:18.240 --> 0:23:19.959 but and a part of me wants to just like 0:23:20.040 --> 0:23:22.840 fucking disinvent to him and tell him all the fucked. 0:23:22.600 --> 0:23:23.920 Up shit that he's done to me. 0:23:25.960 --> 0:23:28.960 That's not really gonna help anything, you know, because my 0:23:29.040 --> 0:23:32.040 dad's kind of a narcissist. He was He's actually been 0:23:32.080 --> 0:23:37.480 diagnosed like with borderline personality disorder and you know, narcissistics 0:23:38.440 --> 0:23:41.560 all that stuff. And I'm sure I got I probably 0:23:41.600 --> 0:23:44.480 inherited some of that stuff. Like I you know, I've 0:23:44.520 --> 0:23:47.840 dealt with alcoholism, I've dealt with drug addiction, but I've 0:23:47.920 --> 0:23:49.719 kind of I've overcome all that stuff. 0:23:50.119 --> 0:23:50.320 You know. 0:23:50.560 --> 0:23:53.760 I still enjoy drinking, but I don't get so drunk 0:23:53.800 --> 0:23:56.359 that I black out and all that stuff, you know, 0:23:56.480 --> 0:23:59.720 Like I can drink aew beers and be fine. And 0:24:00.080 --> 0:24:03.199 you know, I'm just. 0:24:03.440 --> 0:24:05.520 About Do you have kids? It sounds like there's like 0:24:05.600 --> 0:24:07.880 I'm hearing I'm hearing like voices in the background. 0:24:08.640 --> 0:24:10.760 Yeah, yeah, yeah, I have a I have I have 0:24:10.800 --> 0:24:11.720 a six year old son. 0:24:12.119 --> 0:24:13.560 Yeah, you have a six year old son. 0:24:13.640 --> 0:24:15.880 I do have a tiwo ure old time and yeah, 0:24:15.920 --> 0:24:18.520 I'm kind of like, I'm I don't know, I'm just 0:24:18.560 --> 0:24:21.800 been wanting I've been wanting to do this for a while, 0:24:22.080 --> 0:24:26.000 you know, and uh, because I I I signed on 0:24:26.480 --> 0:24:29.479 signed up to Reddit actually like a month ago, and 0:24:29.640 --> 0:24:31.560 your video was one of the first ones that, like, 0:24:31.840 --> 0:24:33.920 I was just scrolling on Reddit just trying to figure 0:24:33.920 --> 0:24:37.320 out how it worked. Your video, your live stream popped 0:24:37.359 --> 0:24:39.119 up on Reddit and I was like, yeah, that's a 0:24:39.200 --> 0:24:42.720 cool as hell. And ever since then, I was, you know, 0:24:43.280 --> 0:24:44.640 I thought it'd be cool to talk to you. 0:24:45.119 --> 0:24:48.639 Well, dude, you know, here's I guess. I guess, for 0:24:48.640 --> 0:24:51.440 for whatever it's worth, my my sort of take on it. 0:24:51.480 --> 0:24:56.639 And you know, obviously this is like a entire, entire, 0:24:56.960 --> 0:25:02.760 entire life thing that I, you know, can't reasonably I. 0:25:02.800 --> 0:25:04.560 Just dropped dropped sload on you. 0:25:04.640 --> 0:25:06.080 No no, no, no, no, Well, I have I have a 0:25:06.200 --> 0:25:07.840 I have a thing. And I'm sure you know, I mean, 0:25:07.880 --> 0:25:09.679 you're you're you're a smart guy. I don't think I'm 0:25:09.680 --> 0:25:14.240 gonna tell you anything you don't know, but like the 0:25:14.240 --> 0:25:17.120 fact that you have a son, I mean, this is 0:25:17.320 --> 0:25:19.680 this is cool, right because now you have an opportunity 0:25:20.160 --> 0:25:26.080 like your parents we're fucking shitty to you, and that 0:25:26.080 --> 0:25:28.359 that hurt you, and you're obviously still dealing with that hurt. 0:25:28.600 --> 0:25:30.639 And I feel like you have this, like you have 0:25:30.680 --> 0:25:34.119 this opportunity to like take all of those feelings and 0:25:34.200 --> 0:25:38.879 like all that anger and all that sadness and all 0:25:39.160 --> 0:25:41.720 you have, you can, like you now can transmute it 0:25:42.400 --> 0:25:46.240 into something positive, right, because you're gonna go, Okay, well, 0:25:46.280 --> 0:25:50.080 my parents fucking sucked, but now I have a kid, 0:25:50.920 --> 0:25:53.959 and I love my kid, and I'm gonna make I'm 0:25:53.960 --> 0:25:57.520 gonna use all these feel all these negative feelings to 0:25:57.680 --> 0:26:03.440 fuel me to make sure that I give my kid 0:26:03.560 --> 0:26:07.880 a great, great life. And that's gonna be my motivator, 0:26:09.600 --> 0:26:13.080 just to just every single day, like you know, be 0:26:13.320 --> 0:26:17.199 the dad that you wanted your dad to be. You know, 0:26:17.280 --> 0:26:22.040 you sort of have this opportunity right to like right 0:26:22.160 --> 0:26:28.680 the wrongs in your relationship with your son. 0:26:31.160 --> 0:26:34.399 Mm hmm yeah, I'm really And you know there are 0:26:34.440 --> 0:26:39.119 there have been times where like I've gotten mad at 0:26:39.119 --> 0:26:42.560 my son and like I see my dad and. 0:26:42.720 --> 0:26:46.840 Me yeah sure, and it really ASTs me. M hm. 0:26:48.640 --> 0:26:55.240 Hm, Like I got feel ashamed of myself. What you 0:26:55.359 --> 0:27:01.520 said is truly I'm sorry. 0:27:02.800 --> 0:27:04.000 How do you, how do you how do you feel 0:27:04.040 --> 0:27:06.080 about how do you feel about all of that? What 0:27:06.240 --> 0:27:07.080 I just said? 0:27:09.000 --> 0:27:12.000 No, he's like you hit me man, Like it's pretty 0:27:12.040 --> 0:27:13.040 much like how I feel. 0:27:13.760 --> 0:27:19.120 Cool. Yeah, that doesn't make you sound like I mean, 0:27:19.119 --> 0:27:21.560 you sound like a good dude, man, Like you know, 0:27:21.720 --> 0:27:23.280 I know that you as you said, you like he 0:27:23.359 --> 0:27:26.080 probably inherited some of that stuff from your dad. But 0:27:26.160 --> 0:27:28.119 like again, man, you sound like a good dude, and like, 0:27:28.200 --> 0:27:32.800 you know, I know that you didn't get the kind 0:27:32.840 --> 0:27:37.000 of life that you know that you that I can 0:27:37.040 --> 0:27:39.840 tell you want to give to your kid. I can 0:27:39.880 --> 0:27:42.240 tell you're a good dude, and you don't. I don't 0:27:42.359 --> 0:27:44.880 want to give your kid a good life. 0:27:46.600 --> 0:27:50.920 I've always felt like I didn't belong in the society 0:27:50.960 --> 0:27:55.480 that I was growing up in, if that makes sense sure, 0:27:55.520 --> 0:27:59.359 because I was like, you grew up in this poor, shitty, white, 0:27:59.440 --> 0:28:03.119 trash fucking society, and I like, I don't know, I 0:28:03.200 --> 0:28:07.399 just I didn't really want to be around any of 0:28:07.400 --> 0:28:10.800 the people that I was around, So like you know, 0:28:11.040 --> 0:28:15.080 like you know, it sucked, you know, I mean, I like, 0:28:15.080 --> 0:28:18.119 like I said, you know, like growing up with my family, 0:28:18.200 --> 0:28:19.960 I've just never really cared for any. 0:28:19.800 --> 0:28:24.880 Of them, and. 0:28:23.440 --> 0:28:26.159 I'm kind of separated myself from all of them, you know, 0:28:26.200 --> 0:28:27.440 except my younger sister. 0:28:28.680 --> 0:28:31.800 It's really only do do you keep keep in good 0:28:31.840 --> 0:28:32.840 touch with your younger sister? 0:28:35.200 --> 0:28:38.040 Oh yeah, yeah, you know, like you but she's always 0:28:38.280 --> 0:28:41.360 you know, hitting me up, you know, because her life sucks. 0:28:41.840 --> 0:28:42.800 In my life is. 0:28:42.880 --> 0:28:46.360 You know, a little better than hers, you know, like 0:28:47.760 --> 0:28:50.240 he constantly bumming money off from me. But she's not 0:28:50.280 --> 0:28:52.320 on drugs or anything like that. She's doing the best 0:28:52.360 --> 0:28:54.520 you can. She has been on drugs and she got 0:28:54.680 --> 0:28:57.800 you know, she got clean. She's doing the best you can. 0:28:59.040 --> 0:29:02.880 You know. You know, I have I have my older sister, 0:29:02.960 --> 0:29:06.479 who's you know, you know, who's taking a shower. She's 0:29:06.320 --> 0:29:09.240 a she's a heroin outic in Texas, you know, or 0:29:09.400 --> 0:29:12.280 I'm you know, like we're fitting all or whatever the fuck, 0:29:12.400 --> 0:29:16.840 you know, she does all that shit, and she, you know, 0:29:17.200 --> 0:29:19.200 is constantly messaging me on Facebook. 0:29:20.200 --> 0:29:21.560 You know, why want to talk to her? 0:29:22.000 --> 0:29:24.920 Like I don't, you know, I have nothing to talk 0:29:24.960 --> 0:29:25.760 to you about. 0:29:26.600 --> 0:29:27.120 You know, like. 0:29:28.760 --> 0:29:33.520 The yeah what you said, like you know, yeah, that's 0:29:33.520 --> 0:29:34.640 pretty much how I feel. 0:29:34.760 --> 0:29:34.960 You know. 0:29:35.880 --> 0:29:38.400 I do want to give the best life of my son, 0:29:38.880 --> 0:29:42.840 and it's me breaking my back. I used to skateboard. 0:29:43.000 --> 0:29:47.520 I broke my pelvis like fifteen years ago, and it, 0:29:47.600 --> 0:29:49.400 you know, it sucked me up for like six months 0:29:49.520 --> 0:29:52.920 to a year, you know, but I thought I healed, 0:29:53.520 --> 0:29:56.560 you know, and I continued to work, you know. And 0:29:56.600 --> 0:29:59.840 then now that I'm forty, like, I can barely even 0:30:00.160 --> 0:30:02.480 you know, I can barely lift you know, forty pounds. 0:30:03.200 --> 0:30:05.800 So it's kind of screwed me up. But I'm you know, 0:30:06.080 --> 0:30:11.240 I'm taking classes online and you know, trying to figure 0:30:11.320 --> 0:30:12.560 something else out, you know. 0:30:13.040 --> 0:30:15.479 Destin, I was gonna you know, as I was, as 0:30:15.520 --> 0:30:18.040 I'm telling you, I mean, it sounds like you're doing 0:30:18.120 --> 0:30:21.959 the best that you can, dude. Like, and I know 0:30:22.000 --> 0:30:24.720 you said that you lose patience sometimes sometimes you see 0:30:24.760 --> 0:30:26.800 your dad and yourself and all that stuff. But like 0:30:27.120 --> 0:30:28.800 but like again, I can just tell and I feel 0:30:28.800 --> 0:30:30.440 like people listen to as they can tell that like 0:30:30.600 --> 0:30:36.760 within you is is is a very very genuine desire 0:30:37.160 --> 0:30:43.080 that I think is more powerful than whatever it is 0:30:43.120 --> 0:30:46.280 that you feel like you inherited from your father or 0:30:46.680 --> 0:30:50.640 whatever physical limitations that you're dealing with right now. Is 0:30:50.960 --> 0:30:57.520 very very genuine, powerful desire to give your son a 0:30:57.560 --> 0:31:02.320 good life, and I I believe that that desire will 0:31:02.320 --> 0:31:06.280 win in the end and that you'll be able to 0:31:06.320 --> 0:31:11.160 do that, you know, so I hope you take that 0:31:11.280 --> 0:31:12.280 for whatever it's worth. 0:31:14.600 --> 0:31:16.560 Yeah, man, yeah, it means a lot to me. Man, 0:31:16.760 --> 0:31:21.160 it's cool talking to you. Yeah. Yeah, I'm so kind 0:31:21.160 --> 0:31:23.000 of like surprised that I got too so quick. 0:31:24.720 --> 0:31:30.440 Yeah, Like, you know, is there anything else that you 0:31:30.520 --> 0:31:35.400 want to say about any of this or any final thoughts, 0:31:35.480 --> 0:31:37.720 feelings or sentiments to share before we go? 0:31:41.040 --> 0:31:43.840 I just really appreciate the ba tire man, Like, it 0:31:43.880 --> 0:31:47.400 was was cool talking to you, and like what you said, 0:31:47.520 --> 0:31:49.840 you know, it meant that meant a lot to me. Man, Okay, 0:31:50.000 --> 0:31:54.920 it made me cry, you know, because like that hit me. 0:31:55.640 --> 0:31:57.040 Yeah, and I know. 0:31:56.960 --> 0:32:02.320 You're just just a get but uh but yeah, dude, 0:32:02.440 --> 0:32:05.800 like you you know were I mean? And I like, 0:32:06.400 --> 0:32:09.960 we all have our problems, man, you know, and I 0:32:09.960 --> 0:32:13.440 don't you know, like we all deal with our ship 0:32:15.760 --> 0:32:18.960 in different ways, and you know, we all yeah, Like 0:32:19.320 --> 0:32:27.480 I don't know, I'm not very articulate sometimes neither of mine. Yeah, 0:32:27.480 --> 0:32:29.560 except see when I'm kind of emotional, and it made 0:32:29.600 --> 0:32:30.280 me emotional. 0:32:30.520 --> 0:32:32.200 And actually this whole. 0:32:32.080 --> 0:32:34.840 You know, situation is you know, I kind of think, 0:32:36.800 --> 0:32:39.360 you know, like I'm surprised to hold it together as 0:32:39.400 --> 0:32:43.960 well as I did explaining this whole situation. Yeah, but 0:32:44.080 --> 0:32:46.720 uh yeah, it was cool talking to you. 0:32:46.720 --> 0:32:49.080 Man, and like I'm yeah, great talking to you too, 0:32:50.120 --> 0:32:51.920 and again just to say it, just to say it 0:32:51.960 --> 0:32:54.600 one final time, okay, just to say it one final time. 0:32:56.880 --> 0:32:59.320 I I I believe in you, Okay, I think I 0:32:59.360 --> 0:33:02.880 think I think, like I could just tell again people 0:33:02.920 --> 0:33:06.640 listening to just can just tell like you you have 0:33:06.720 --> 0:33:10.200 that genuine desire to do good by your son, and 0:33:10.240 --> 0:33:15.320 I I I think you will act act well by 0:33:15.360 --> 0:33:17.320 that desire. I believe in you. 0:33:19.960 --> 0:33:23.800 That's cool to hear that, man, And yeah, I kind 0:33:23.800 --> 0:33:25.400 of I feel I feel that way. I mean, I 0:33:25.440 --> 0:33:28.360 have my doubts you know, of course, like everybody does, 0:33:28.520 --> 0:33:29.520 you know about youself. 0:33:30.320 --> 0:33:33.880 So yeah, but uh yeah, I. 0:33:33.880 --> 0:33:38.160 Try to, you know, just persevere, persevere and push on 0:33:38.240 --> 0:33:40.480 and you know, and do the best I can and 0:33:41.200 --> 0:33:43.800 be the best dad you know I can. And and 0:33:43.920 --> 0:33:46.240 luckily you know, he doesn't. He's not a broken home, 0:33:46.600 --> 0:33:48.800 you know, so that helps. 0:33:50.200 --> 0:33:53.560 Well, thank you very much for calling Dustin once again. Man, 0:33:53.880 --> 0:33:54.640 Good luck to you. 0:33:57.200 --> 0:33:59.360 All right, Thanks man, good talking to you, dude. 0:33:59.240 --> 0:33:59.880 Good talking to you. 0:34:00.120 --> 0:34:03.360 So have a good night, alright, you two man? 0:34:05.400 --> 0:34:11.960 Hello? Is this Jason? It is Jason. It says here 0:34:12.960 --> 0:34:17.080 that there is a toilet paper shortage in your in 0:34:17.120 --> 0:34:21.840 your house and it is causing a lot of conflict 0:34:21.880 --> 0:34:23.919 between you and your roommates. 0:34:26.440 --> 0:34:27.040 Yeah. 0:34:27.280 --> 0:34:34.400 Yeah, it's it's been tough just kind of deciding on 0:34:34.440 --> 0:34:36.239 who's going to buy the toilet paper. It's been four 0:34:36.280 --> 0:34:37.879 to eight all right. 0:34:37.920 --> 0:34:43.880 So before we get into anything, what is your philosophy, 0:34:43.920 --> 0:34:46.520 because there's many different ways of thinking about this, Okay, 0:34:46.560 --> 0:34:48.480 there's a lot of different ways to set this up. Sure, 0:34:49.040 --> 0:34:51.080 if it's for do how many how many people? 0:34:51.120 --> 0:34:51.279 Is it. 0:34:53.719 --> 0:34:59.920 Five plus five of you guys sharing one bathroom two bathrooms? 0:35:00.080 --> 0:35:02.200 So three upstairs, two downstairs? 0:35:02.719 --> 0:35:06.600 Okay, okay? And is it one bathroom in particular that's 0:35:06.680 --> 0:35:09.200 experiencing a toilet paper shortage or is there a general 0:35:09.200 --> 0:35:12.719 toilet paper shortage because people from the when the downstairs 0:35:12.719 --> 0:35:15.920 bathroom runs out of toilet paper, people will go to 0:35:15.960 --> 0:35:18.520 the upstairs. What is the sort of distribution of paper? 0:35:20.800 --> 0:35:21.560 Sure, so we. 0:35:21.600 --> 0:35:24.799 Had like a like a big collection of toilet paper upstairs, 0:35:24.840 --> 0:35:27.880 like probably sixteen seventeen rolls and then like you know, 0:35:27.920 --> 0:35:29.960 we have people come over and then like the upstairs 0:35:29.960 --> 0:35:31.319 passing a little bit more, a little bit, a little 0:35:31.320 --> 0:35:35.520 bit cleaner. So the downstairs then ran out of toilet paper, 0:35:35.880 --> 0:35:38.920 came upstairs, took some of the upstairs, which is fine, yeah, Sharon. 0:35:39.800 --> 0:35:42.800 And now we've resorted to we're friends with our neighbors. 0:35:42.840 --> 0:35:46.080 So now we we have covert operations and we go 0:35:46.160 --> 0:35:48.480 to the neighbor's house and steal their toilet paper. 0:35:50.520 --> 0:35:54.399 So there's several different schools of thought as to how 0:35:54.520 --> 0:36:00.480 this could be arranged. Right, you could say, one person 0:36:01.080 --> 0:36:05.640 buys a thing of toilet paper in full, and then 0:36:06.000 --> 0:36:12.640 whenever that toilet paper disappears, another person buys, and then again, 0:36:12.800 --> 0:36:14.759 and then another person buys, and then again and you 0:36:14.840 --> 0:36:20.640 sort of go in this rotation. Or there's a there's 0:36:20.640 --> 0:36:23.959 a school of thought where every time new toilet paper 0:36:23.960 --> 0:36:28.040 needs to be bought, everyone equally pitches in for new 0:36:28.040 --> 0:36:31.680 toilet paper at each buying of the toilet paper. Or 0:36:31.960 --> 0:36:33.839 and this is the one that will cause a war. 0:36:34.840 --> 0:36:37.480 I don't know if this is the one. The school 0:36:37.480 --> 0:36:39.879 of thought that you guys have been subscribing to. You 0:36:40.000 --> 0:36:47.520 do some form of calculating who uses the most toilet paper, 0:36:48.320 --> 0:36:52.160 and the onus is on that person to replenish it, 0:36:52.560 --> 0:36:56.040 and that causes lots and lots of conflict of you know, 0:36:56.120 --> 0:37:00.920 who used how much and whatnot. So at this current moment, 0:37:01.520 --> 0:37:03.200 what what is the school of thought that your house 0:37:03.200 --> 0:37:03.799 has been using. 0:37:06.440 --> 0:37:08.879 Wow, you know, I'm gonna be honest, I hadn't thought 0:37:08.920 --> 0:37:13.320 about that third one, because there certainly is like a 0:37:13.400 --> 0:37:18.560 mass distribution as far as you know, people you know, 0:37:18.680 --> 0:37:21.439 rates for cooping and such. It was going out within 0:37:21.480 --> 0:37:23.760 the household, and the thing is like we're all employed, 0:37:23.800 --> 0:37:26.560 Like we all totally could just go buy the toilet paper. 0:37:27.600 --> 0:37:30.160 Now it's just bag. It's like, oh, who's going to 0:37:30.280 --> 0:37:32.640 do it? You know, like certain people have more roles 0:37:32.640 --> 0:37:36.080 in the past than others, and so like distributing, distributing 0:37:36.120 --> 0:37:39.120 that out, trying to figure that out. But like, there definitely, yeah, 0:37:39.320 --> 0:37:40.879 is some people who put more in the house. 0:37:41.000 --> 0:37:43.080 I hadn't thought about it that way, don't. 0:37:43.120 --> 0:37:45.040 I shouldn't even brought up the idea because you're not 0:37:45.040 --> 0:37:55.799 gonna win that fight. Oh, because we used to do 0:37:55.880 --> 0:37:57.600 that in my house and I was the one who 0:37:57.760 --> 0:38:00.600 used the most toilet paper, and I vehemoately denied it 0:38:01.360 --> 0:38:04.719 to the end, as will the person who uses the 0:38:04.719 --> 0:38:06.359 most toilet paper, and you will not win that fight. 0:38:07.080 --> 0:38:09.040 So what is the rift that you are describing it 0:38:09.480 --> 0:38:13.320 like between you and your roommates the rift is causing? 0:38:14.120 --> 0:38:19.960 Yes, yeah, it's it's it's funny, I mean not not 0:38:20.040 --> 0:38:22.400 like it's like it doesn't just doesn't happen all the time. 0:38:22.520 --> 0:38:26.360 But it's like there's definitely like like little like scheming 0:38:26.440 --> 0:38:29.040 teams you know going on. Like people are like one 0:38:29.040 --> 0:38:30.520 of one of us will be in the kitchen, another 0:38:30.560 --> 0:38:32.279 person will walk down and be like, oh man, we're 0:38:32.280 --> 0:38:33.880 on a toilet paper. Can you believe you know, the 0:38:33.920 --> 0:38:35.799 other people haven't bought it? And then you know, like 0:38:35.880 --> 0:38:39.279 everybody like I have that, I've had that conversation with everybody, 0:38:39.520 --> 0:38:42.200 so like, you know, it's it's going around m hm. 0:38:42.400 --> 0:38:44.400 So there's a little bit of chicken being played as 0:38:44.400 --> 0:38:46.080 to who will buy the toilet paper. 0:38:47.840 --> 0:38:50.200 For sure, and like again, you know, it's not like 0:38:50.360 --> 0:38:53.000 we can't afford toilet papers, so like like we all 0:38:53.040 --> 0:38:55.000 could do it, and I like don't know if we 0:38:55.040 --> 0:38:56.960 all think it's funny at this point or if we're 0:38:56.960 --> 0:39:00.920 all like actually a little like passive drestive about it. 0:39:01.200 --> 0:39:03.160 I mean, I understand you all thinking it's funny. It 0:39:03.480 --> 0:39:05.080 is a little funny to see how long you can 0:39:05.080 --> 0:39:07.920 go without having toilet paper in the house, and the 0:39:07.960 --> 0:39:13.080 pettiness of one person won't just buy toilet paper. It 0:39:13.160 --> 0:39:16.120 is a pretty funny situation to revel in. I agree. 0:39:18.200 --> 0:39:21.879 And the crazy part is is that we had, like 0:39:21.920 --> 0:39:24.399 we were sitting on the couch like a couple months ago, 0:39:24.640 --> 0:39:26.319 and we were like, yo, we should buy it the day, 0:39:26.360 --> 0:39:28.759 and we bought and installed it the day. But the 0:39:28.840 --> 0:39:33.040 day recently became unusable. And so I think that now 0:39:33.080 --> 0:39:34.560 that I'm like sitting here putting on all the gather 0:39:34.600 --> 0:39:37.520 excessus and dan chats that used the day, I think 0:39:37.560 --> 0:39:38.520 it's it's the. 0:39:38.560 --> 0:39:39.640 Lack of the day. 0:39:39.719 --> 0:39:41.800 Maybe that we're cruising through our toilet paper at a 0:39:41.840 --> 0:39:42.400 faster rate. 0:39:43.239 --> 0:39:46.839 M I've never personally been a fan of the day, 0:39:46.880 --> 0:39:50.640 but I understand it from a point of view of conservation. 0:39:51.560 --> 0:39:57.280 So all right, so you no, go ahead. 0:39:59.640 --> 0:40:01.080 I was just it said, did you go into the 0:40:01.120 --> 0:40:03.080 day with an open mind? Because I feel like a 0:40:03.080 --> 0:40:04.359 lot of people don't go into it with an. 0:40:04.320 --> 0:40:06.880 Open mind, you know, I totally, I totally did not 0:40:06.920 --> 0:40:08.919 go into it one of the with an open mind. 0:40:09.120 --> 0:40:12.440 I'd be willing to try again, but but not any time, 0:40:12.560 --> 0:40:15.439 not anytime soon. But but so okay, so you all 0:40:16.239 --> 0:40:19.560 have been playing this, this game of chicken, and it's 0:40:19.719 --> 0:40:21.680 really gonna be up to at the end of the day, 0:40:21.760 --> 0:40:25.640 one guy to break and go fuck this and go 0:40:25.640 --> 0:40:29.120 aheut and buy toilet paper. Do you think that you're 0:40:29.160 --> 0:40:35.120 getting to that point whose the group will break first? 0:40:35.600 --> 0:40:35.839 Yeah? 0:40:35.920 --> 0:40:36.400 I mean. 0:40:39.200 --> 0:40:41.080 I think the person who's gonna break is gonna be 0:40:41.120 --> 0:40:43.040 the person who's gonna be like the most adult about 0:40:43.080 --> 0:40:45.600 the situation, because I definitely have like a couple of 0:40:45.640 --> 0:40:49.160 them who like probably won't do it. And that's fine, 0:40:49.320 --> 0:40:52.160 you know, I get it. It's cool. I think it's 0:40:52.160 --> 0:40:54.160 gonna be me or my other roommate honestly, who's gonna 0:40:54.160 --> 0:40:54.640 break first. 0:40:55.280 --> 0:40:57.560 Mm hm. So I want to hear from your perspective, 0:40:58.800 --> 0:40:59.799 why won't you just go. 0:40:59.680 --> 0:40:59.880 By to. 0:41:03.719 --> 0:41:04.160 Honestly? 0:41:04.239 --> 0:41:06.640 Because well, I thought about doing it today and I 0:41:06.680 --> 0:41:08.600 was like working, and then I had class and I 0:41:08.680 --> 0:41:10.880 was like, I don't feel like doing it, And honestly, 0:41:10.880 --> 0:41:12.440 it just came down a way to it. Even though 0:41:12.520 --> 0:41:15.359 I was out and about today earlier, I probably could 0:41:15.360 --> 0:41:17.120 have done it. And then I got home and we 0:41:17.120 --> 0:41:19.400 were out of toilet paper. It was actually pretty funny 0:41:19.440 --> 0:41:22.120 because I saw that we were almost out of toilet 0:41:22.160 --> 0:41:24.960 paper earlier when I went to the bathroom and I 0:41:25.080 --> 0:41:26.759 was like the last role I knew we had in 0:41:26.800 --> 0:41:29.279 the house, and there was probably like six or seven 0:41:29.320 --> 0:41:32.080 squares on it, and so I used like three or 0:41:32.120 --> 0:41:35.560 four and then that way, I wasn't, you know, the 0:41:35.600 --> 0:41:38.080 a hole who took the last little piece of pilet paper, 0:41:38.760 --> 0:41:40.160 So then I could kind of bond that. 0:41:40.160 --> 0:41:41.040 Off on somebody else. 0:41:42.520 --> 0:41:47.319 M So it sounds like this is coming that makes 0:41:47.360 --> 0:41:48.760 me that my bad person. 0:41:48.800 --> 0:41:49.200 I don't know. 0:41:49.800 --> 0:41:52.200 No, No, you're you're actually pro very strategic in that. 0:41:54.600 --> 0:41:57.160 Yeah, I don't know. Maybe it's me planning off on 0:41:57.200 --> 0:41:57.719 somebody else. 0:41:57.840 --> 0:42:00.440 The you know, I don't know. 0:42:01.400 --> 0:42:02.839 All's fair and toilet paper and war. 0:42:05.640 --> 0:42:06.200 That is true. 0:42:06.280 --> 0:42:09.080 There's there's no wars like earlier. Excuse me, there's no 0:42:09.160 --> 0:42:10.040 rules right. 0:42:10.120 --> 0:42:14.200 Like, So it sounds like it's not coming from a 0:42:14.239 --> 0:42:17.760 place of because it's coming from a place of laziness. 0:42:17.760 --> 0:42:20.080 For you, it sounds and not a place of why 0:42:20.160 --> 0:42:23.040 should I have to you know, you know what I mean, 0:42:23.080 --> 0:42:26.560 a place of of of of feeling like it's not 0:42:27.000 --> 0:42:29.760 just for you to have to go buy toilet paper. 0:42:30.080 --> 0:42:32.440 Yeah, I think too, you know, a little bit. But 0:42:32.440 --> 0:42:35.160 there also, like definitely are certainly other places in the 0:42:35.160 --> 0:42:36.759 house where it's like, Okay, why do I have to 0:42:36.800 --> 0:42:38.560 do this? And so I think it kind of transfers 0:42:38.560 --> 0:42:41.440 over then to the toilet paper because I feel like 0:42:41.480 --> 0:42:43.880 sometimes I do like a lot more than a lot 0:42:43.920 --> 0:42:47.719 of my other roommates and things, and so then I'm like, 0:42:47.840 --> 0:42:48.080 you know. 0:42:51.719 --> 0:42:53.000 Right, so there is a little bit of that, and 0:42:53.000 --> 0:42:55.759 it seems like it's justified. Right, You're doing all these 0:42:55.760 --> 0:42:57.680 other things in the house. I assume you're washing dishes, 0:42:57.719 --> 0:43:00.080 you're vacuuming, you're doing all the more adult things, and 0:43:00.200 --> 0:43:02.000 you're like, well, god, damn it, why do I have 0:43:02.000 --> 0:43:03.080 to be the paper too? 0:43:05.440 --> 0:43:09.080 Yeah, exactly when I know that, like, wow, I won't 0:43:09.120 --> 0:43:11.439 bash Like I love my roommates, don't get anyone. They're 0:43:11.440 --> 0:43:13.880 all awesome guys, and they're like some of my closest friends. 0:43:13.880 --> 0:43:16.000 But yeah, it definitely does have a lot like that. 0:43:17.840 --> 0:43:20.640 Well, listen, Jason, you know, being the adult of a house, 0:43:20.680 --> 0:43:23.319 it's a it's a it's a thankless job. So you know, 0:43:24.440 --> 0:43:26.759 good on you for for taking of it. 0:43:30.680 --> 0:43:31.920 That's true. That is true. 0:43:31.960 --> 0:43:35.880 You know, maybe maybe you can learn something from your mom, 0:43:36.080 --> 0:43:38.439 because every day I went upstairs in high school brand 0:43:38.440 --> 0:43:39.399 your toilet paper roll. 0:43:39.320 --> 0:43:39.640 On the thing. 0:43:43.120 --> 0:43:44.680 We're really taking our parents for granted. 0:43:47.120 --> 0:43:49.480 I think we do have you did you d end 0:43:49.520 --> 0:43:50.480 up calling your mom earlier? 0:43:51.600 --> 0:43:56.640 Thank you very much for calling. Jason, appreciate it. 0:43:56.640 --> 0:44:07.640 Every night, man, you as well, Paul from Sammy Sammy, No, 0:44:07.640 --> 0:44:09.680 no way, Samy. 0:44:09.719 --> 0:44:10.279 What's going on? 0:44:10.320 --> 0:44:13.680 Man? Not much? 0:44:14.000 --> 0:44:15.960 I kind of figured you're going to be streaming with 0:44:16.120 --> 0:44:19.440 calls tonight, expecting the doctor someone else do for you. 0:44:21.040 --> 0:44:24.040 Oh yes, I normally have a call screener, but tonight 0:44:24.920 --> 0:44:27.960 I am as they say, going in raw. 0:44:29.480 --> 0:44:32.239 I did have a question for you, Yeah, please, what's up? 0:44:34.200 --> 0:44:38.240 I wanted to know what your thoughts are on imposter syndrome. 0:44:39.360 --> 0:44:42.719 You have to have a cool job. Yes, I think 0:44:44.360 --> 0:44:46.560 I heard you think yesterday that you're only twenty four. 0:44:47.480 --> 0:44:50.520 I am I expected you to be older than that. 0:44:51.640 --> 0:44:52.920 How old did you expect me? A bit? 0:44:54.120 --> 0:44:57.239 I don't know, maybe later twenties. But you just seem 0:44:57.280 --> 0:44:59.240 to be in a position where you're doing something cool 0:44:59.280 --> 0:44:59.719 that you like. 0:45:00.400 --> 0:45:00.759 Mm hmm. 0:45:03.880 --> 0:45:07.239 And I am not gonna lie to you. I haven't 0:45:07.280 --> 0:45:14.319 been feeling very cool lately, been feeling more failure ask 0:45:14.640 --> 0:45:21.879 although we're doing better, but wondering if you've ever dealt 0:45:21.880 --> 0:45:25.000 with that, and or if you have any tips or tricks. 0:45:25.320 --> 0:45:29.279 I literally, I literally if I if I were like 0:45:29.280 --> 0:45:31.319 a cool streamer person and I knew how to like 0:45:32.040 --> 0:45:35.040 zip zop zoom around my computer and pull things up, 0:45:35.200 --> 0:45:39.640 I would show you. I literally googled I have imposter syndrome. 0:45:40.719 --> 0:45:44.719 Read it today. I literally googled that. Today. I can 0:45:44.960 --> 0:45:49.880 find Reddit, uh the streams of people or Reddit threads 0:45:49.880 --> 0:45:52.480 of people talking about having impost syndrome. You have the 0:45:52.560 --> 0:45:56.239 fuck time of imposter syndrome. That's why I'm Yeah, I 0:45:56.280 --> 0:45:59.440 have these live shows coming up. I'm super nervous for them. 0:45:59.440 --> 0:46:01.520 I'm always the thinking like, why the fuck is anyone 0:46:02.800 --> 0:46:04.480 coming to see me? I'm always thinking like, why the 0:46:04.480 --> 0:46:08.279 fuck is anyone listening to my podcast? You know, I'm 0:46:08.560 --> 0:46:09.800 I'm always thinking about that stuff. 0:46:09.840 --> 0:46:10.160 I have. 0:46:11.640 --> 0:46:14.960 A tremendous imposter syndrome. What gets me going is I 0:46:14.960 --> 0:46:20.399 do have like every once in a while I come 0:46:20.440 --> 0:46:23.360 out of here and I'm like, and I'm just a 0:46:23.520 --> 0:46:26.239 fully one hundred percent sure. I'm like, that was a 0:46:26.239 --> 0:46:31.920 great stream. I'm really good at this, and I'm excited 0:46:32.880 --> 0:46:34.719 and I just feel good and then I get high 0:46:34.760 --> 0:46:37.200 and then I'm like, I'm just the best. I'm sick. 0:46:38.239 --> 0:46:41.440 I am the only person that could ever be therapy Gecko. 0:46:41.719 --> 0:46:44.960 It happens sometimes. I'm not gonna lie that that happens sometimes. 0:46:44.960 --> 0:46:49.080 But the default is probably I don't know what I 0:46:49.080 --> 0:46:52.280 would say the default is, but no, heavy, heavy, heavy 0:46:52.280 --> 0:46:57.279 amounts of imposter syndrome for sure. I literally not check. 0:46:57.320 --> 0:46:59.320 I literally googled it today because I was trying to 0:46:59.360 --> 0:47:01.279 read about it, like this is a common thing, like 0:47:01.640 --> 0:47:02.960 to other people feel like this. 0:47:04.280 --> 0:47:07.520 You know, well, I think I think it's honestly helpful 0:47:07.600 --> 0:47:15.480 to hear people who like you think are successful say like, no, 0:47:15.640 --> 0:47:17.359 I don't. I don't really feel like that all the time. 0:47:19.680 --> 0:47:25.279 Yeah. Yeah, I'm trying to think here, uh, because I 0:47:25.280 --> 0:47:30.480 want to be accurate to this. There are a couple 0:47:30.520 --> 0:47:35.239 of things I think I'm really good at, but but 0:47:35.360 --> 0:47:37.120 this I phased it out. I I just have times 0:47:37.120 --> 0:47:38.480 all the time and I'm on here and I'm like, 0:47:39.080 --> 0:47:43.279 I suck at this. And it's so funny that you 0:47:43.680 --> 0:47:45.800 called and asked me that, because I always wonder that 0:47:45.920 --> 0:47:51.239 about people that I think are successful as well, like 0:47:51.280 --> 0:47:53.759 how they feel about it, Like do they are they 0:47:53.840 --> 0:47:57.439 like stoked on themselves, or are they like I hope 0:47:57.440 --> 0:48:01.840 nobody realizes that I kind of suck at this. I 0:48:01.840 --> 0:48:02.239 don't know. 0:48:03.880 --> 0:48:06.319 I have this thing with social media right now. I 0:48:06.360 --> 0:48:08.400 had to delete it off my phone for a while, 0:48:08.440 --> 0:48:10.840 and I just recently got back on. And I feel 0:48:10.840 --> 0:48:15.560 like all I'm seeing is everyone else around me and 0:48:15.640 --> 0:48:20.040 like their great achievements and like, you know, how happy 0:48:20.080 --> 0:48:22.200 they all look and how much fun everyone's having. And 0:48:22.239 --> 0:48:25.799 I'm like, well, I'm not having that much fun. And 0:48:25.880 --> 0:48:27.880 I think maybe that should be my sign to delete 0:48:27.920 --> 0:48:28.960 social media again. 0:48:29.960 --> 0:48:32.239 I really thought that. I was like, I was like 0:48:32.360 --> 0:48:34.120 the people who listened to my you know, I was 0:48:34.120 --> 0:48:35.879 thicking the other day. I was like, the people who 0:48:35.960 --> 0:48:37.799 listen to my I mean now they do, but the 0:48:37.800 --> 0:48:40.200 people who like listen to my podcast and watch my 0:48:41.600 --> 0:48:44.760 streams or stuff, they have no idea. That I cried 0:48:44.800 --> 0:48:48.279 in my car yesterday, I thought that. As I was 0:48:48.280 --> 0:48:51.080 crying in my car, I was like, they have no idea. 0:48:52.080 --> 0:48:52.799 It's kind of sick. 0:48:55.440 --> 0:48:59.920 I walked down the street yesterday and cried. Really well, 0:49:00.080 --> 0:49:03.320 when I think, I think, well, I thought I was 0:49:03.360 --> 0:49:07.759 going to fail a class. Yeah, there was a little 0:49:07.800 --> 0:49:10.600 bit of stress going on. Yeah, a lot of it 0:49:10.719 --> 0:49:11.160 of stress. 0:49:11.200 --> 0:49:18.080 Actually, No, definitely. What okay, So you said you feel 0:49:18.120 --> 0:49:19.160 like a failure. 0:49:20.800 --> 0:49:21.319 A little bit? 0:49:22.280 --> 0:49:22.799 What don't? 0:49:23.760 --> 0:49:26.120 What does it? What does the success look like to you? 0:49:32.760 --> 0:49:40.719 Well, I I go to a what I would I 0:49:40.760 --> 0:49:44.800 go to a pretty competitive school and we have this 0:49:44.800 --> 0:49:48.400 this interesting program where you can go and you can work. 0:49:48.760 --> 0:49:50.719 You basically get a job for six months and then you 0:49:50.800 --> 0:49:55.719 go back to school. And so it feels like everyone 0:49:56.680 --> 0:50:01.880 around me is like a very competent young professional. Yeah, 0:50:02.200 --> 0:50:07.160 and like I'm twenty two. I'm not like a kid anymore. 0:50:07.200 --> 0:50:10.560 I'm not like a teenager. And I'm I'm gonna be 0:50:10.600 --> 0:50:15.759 graduating hopefully next December if I don't fail this class. 0:50:17.040 --> 0:50:22.120 And I'm I'm genuinely just trying to like get by 0:50:22.280 --> 0:50:25.000 on a day to day basis, you know, like I'm 0:50:25.000 --> 0:50:31.480 trying to not be miserable and not not like wake 0:50:31.600 --> 0:50:36.239 up sad and like you know, remember to eat and 0:50:36.680 --> 0:50:39.360 move my body. And it's like everyone else around me 0:50:39.680 --> 0:50:43.399 is like they have like a full time job and 0:50:43.680 --> 0:50:46.960 they're doing research and they're also taking classes. 0:50:47.600 --> 0:50:50.480 They're like, it's no, it's so annoying, isn't it. It's 0:50:50.520 --> 0:50:52.560 so annoying when you go to someone's house and like 0:50:53.040 --> 0:50:57.400 they don't have like fucking empty water bottles and candy 0:50:57.440 --> 0:50:59.880 wrappers everywhere, and you're like, fuck, am I the only 0:51:01.480 --> 0:51:03.080 one that fucking lives like this? 0:51:03.200 --> 0:51:07.719 And shit, I know I'm not the only one. 0:51:08.560 --> 0:51:10.560 No, you're totally not the only one. You're totally not 0:51:10.600 --> 0:51:12.920 the only one. And there's probably here's the thing, there's people, 0:51:14.000 --> 0:51:16.120 by the way, everyone loves to say this and it's 0:51:16.160 --> 0:51:18.920 not true. I don't know if I don't know if 0:51:18.920 --> 0:51:21.600 it's not true. I shouldn't have said it's not true 0:51:21.760 --> 0:51:27.719 because my feelings on its truth are constantly developing. But 0:51:27.960 --> 0:51:30.960 people like to say, like everybody has something going on, 0:51:31.080 --> 0:51:34.600 you know, they like to say the truth, the genuine 0:51:34.600 --> 0:51:38.280 truth is there are totally people who are more competent 0:51:38.320 --> 0:51:43.560 than you. Uh, they're always will be Uh those people 0:51:43.560 --> 0:51:45.200 who people you know, people love to say. They love 0:51:45.239 --> 0:51:48.120 to say the people who are posting on social media 0:51:48.320 --> 0:51:50.400 about how much fun they're having, then I actually they 0:51:50.440 --> 0:51:54.600 might they might be that person who just posted about 0:51:54.600 --> 0:51:57.160 going to fucking the club with her friends, and how 0:51:57.280 --> 0:52:00.440 was the great? Maybe she really did have an awesome time. 0:52:03.040 --> 0:52:06.560 That's it could be true. But here's the thing is 0:52:06.600 --> 0:52:08.520 that that's the wrong. I hate that. I hate when 0:52:08.520 --> 0:52:10.480 people say that, oh, they're not actually having a good time, 0:52:10.640 --> 0:52:14.040 because that's not that's miss that's totally missing the point. 0:52:14.600 --> 0:52:17.880 That's just completely misses the points. 0:52:19.440 --> 0:52:22.520 I would feel like the point should be, Please, I 0:52:22.520 --> 0:52:23.239 shouldn't care. 0:52:23.960 --> 0:52:25.839 No, you shouldn't care exactly, shouldn't care. It's not even 0:52:26.000 --> 0:52:26.800 it's not relevant. 0:52:27.600 --> 0:52:30.200 It's not relevant at all to my life in my 0:52:30.480 --> 0:52:35.600 potential future success. No, but it's so hard. I think 0:52:35.600 --> 0:52:37.239 it's hard. I just think I just need to get 0:52:37.280 --> 0:52:40.040 rid of it. I need to not see it. But also, 0:52:41.480 --> 0:52:43.680 you know, maybe I would like to get to a 0:52:43.719 --> 0:52:45.520 point where I can see it and then I can 0:52:45.560 --> 0:52:46.960 just be happy for them. 0:52:47.360 --> 0:52:51.440 Yes right now? Yeah, I mean, like I would say, 0:52:52.560 --> 0:52:55.359 I would agree with you. I would say, I mean, look, 0:52:55.400 --> 0:52:58.279 I'm never gonna I don't think anyone would ever tell 0:52:58.320 --> 0:53:03.759 you that deleting your social media would be destructive for 0:53:03.840 --> 0:53:06.920 your mental health. I think, uh, like, I think you 0:53:06.960 --> 0:53:10.200 would definitely be happy or not being online if I could, 0:53:10.719 --> 0:53:12.920 if I didn't have all this shit going on. I 0:53:12.960 --> 0:53:15.719 would I dream it all the time. I literally like, 0:53:15.760 --> 0:53:18.080 will fantasize a boy like, oh man, whatever, like I 0:53:18.719 --> 0:53:20.440 like fall off or whatever it is. I could just 0:53:20.440 --> 0:53:24.560 delete all and then just go to the moon or whatever. 0:53:24.560 --> 0:53:32.200 The fuck. It'd be sick anyway. Uh alright, but you're right. 0:53:32.200 --> 0:53:33.920 You were right about part two where you were like, 0:53:34.000 --> 0:53:36.560 you want to get to that point where it's not 0:53:36.640 --> 0:53:40.000 even about avoiding it, it's about the It's almost like 0:53:40.040 --> 0:53:42.120 the opposite. It's like you want to be able to 0:53:42.280 --> 0:53:46.560 like see that girl from your fucking sorority or whatever 0:53:46.680 --> 0:53:50.120 that's like hanging out in Cabo and having fun, and 0:53:50.160 --> 0:53:51.719 you want to be like you want to be able 0:53:51.760 --> 0:53:53.319 to look at that and go, man, it's awesome that 0:53:53.360 --> 0:53:55.640 she's having hanging on Caba. I hope she's having an 0:53:55.640 --> 0:53:56.279 awesome time. 0:53:57.360 --> 0:53:58.800 You know, it's great. 0:53:58.600 --> 0:54:01.960 That it could for her. You know, I would. I 0:54:02.000 --> 0:54:03.480 would take that a step that I would take a 0:54:03.560 --> 0:54:08.960 higher I would make that your aspiration like even higher 0:54:08.960 --> 0:54:12.319 than like ignoring it is being able to actually do 0:54:12.360 --> 0:54:14.960 the opposite and put it in your face and be like, oh, 0:54:15.040 --> 0:54:17.280 this person got a promotion, this person got this job, 0:54:17.400 --> 0:54:19.839 like that's awesome for them, that's so great. I'm so 0:54:20.200 --> 0:54:24.239 my heart is so full of endless love for the 0:54:24.400 --> 0:54:29.719 universal people that I'm just so happy for everyone. I'm 0:54:29.719 --> 0:54:32.520 happy all the time. I have infinite joy at the 0:54:32.520 --> 0:54:35.080 fact that I'm able to sit here and breathe and 0:54:35.200 --> 0:54:37.880 drink a fucking cup of water, that I have no 0:54:38.040 --> 0:54:43.319 need for uh, jealousy at this person that you know 0:54:44.560 --> 0:54:47.759 that went to the moon today or whatever. I don't 0:54:47.880 --> 0:54:49.440 like to keep talking about the moon, but. 0:54:52.239 --> 0:54:54.319 No, I mean that's the reality I want to live in. 0:54:55.200 --> 0:54:56.640 Same dude, And it seems like. 0:54:56.640 --> 0:54:57.600 You want to go to the moon. 0:54:59.000 --> 0:55:01.239 No, I don't give a fuck about it. No, I 0:55:01.640 --> 0:55:03.640 shouldn't have said that I would love to go to 0:55:03.680 --> 0:55:05.880 the moon. I'll probably die not ever having gone to 0:55:05.960 --> 0:55:07.759 the moon, but it's nice to think about. 0:55:08.480 --> 0:55:08.880 I don't know. 0:55:08.880 --> 0:55:11.600 I think your chances are higher now than they've ever 0:55:11.640 --> 0:55:12.240 been before. 0:55:13.400 --> 0:55:16.920 You're probably right about that. You're definitely right about that. 0:55:17.680 --> 0:55:19.839 My chances are going to the moon are higher than 0:55:19.840 --> 0:55:24.360 they were before. They are higher than they were a 0:55:24.360 --> 0:55:29.520 few years ago. What do you feel about how this 0:55:29.560 --> 0:55:30.600 conversation went. 0:55:32.320 --> 0:55:37.560 I am genuinely excited to tell my boyfriend that I 0:55:37.600 --> 0:55:41.759 talked to a few weeks ago. For my spring break. 0:55:41.800 --> 0:55:45.440 We traveled from North Carolina to Florida in a car 0:55:45.760 --> 0:55:47.600 and we had like a twelve hour road trip on it. 0:55:47.640 --> 0:55:49.920 On the way back, we we listened to your podcast 0:55:50.080 --> 0:55:53.360 almost the whole time. Thank you, and I became a 0:55:53.440 --> 0:55:56.359 huge hymn benefensive See the. 0:55:56.320 --> 0:55:58.440 Fact how many how many episodes of the podcast did 0:55:58.440 --> 0:55:58.920 you listen to? 0:56:00.640 --> 0:56:05.480 A lot? I wasn't. I haven't been on Twitch. I 0:56:05.800 --> 0:56:08.800 didn't really know fully like the whole deal with Twitch 0:56:08.880 --> 0:56:12.279 until like literally a few weeks ago, and I think 0:56:12.320 --> 0:56:14.200 I've probably watched you the most. 0:56:14.680 --> 0:56:16.800 See that's great because sometimes I look at the podcast 0:56:16.800 --> 0:56:18.680 and I'm like, I can't believe anyone's listening to this, 0:56:19.200 --> 0:56:20.560 And there we go, you're listening to it. 0:56:20.640 --> 0:56:25.000 So no, I certainly was listening to it perfect. 0:56:25.200 --> 0:56:30.399 So there we go. There, that's that's that's that's yeah. 0:56:30.440 --> 0:56:30.799 I don't know. 0:56:30.840 --> 0:56:34.440 I guess, I guess, uh, yeah, I have a ton 0:56:34.480 --> 0:56:35.480 of imposter syndrome. 0:56:37.080 --> 0:56:37.360 I was. 0:56:37.360 --> 0:56:38.680 So I was gonna follow that up by saying, I 0:56:38.680 --> 0:56:41.200 think everyone does, but I don't think everyone does. Even 0:56:41.200 --> 0:56:45.000 if they do, it doesn't matter. We're just all doing stuff, 0:56:45.160 --> 0:56:50.200 walking around, drinking water, hanging out, being people until we die. 0:56:51.360 --> 0:56:51.960 Doing our best. 0:56:55.000 --> 0:56:59.000 What's your name again, Sammy? Sammy? There's anything you want 0:56:59.000 --> 0:57:01.399 to tell the people the computer before we go or say, 0:57:01.520 --> 0:57:02.479 or I. 0:57:02.440 --> 0:57:04.360 Hope you go to the moon some day if you 0:57:04.440 --> 0:57:05.160 really want to do that. 0:57:06.680 --> 0:57:11.239 Thank you very much. Have a nice night you as well. 0:57:12.280 --> 0:57:12.640 Thank you. 0:57:17.920 --> 0:57:19.000 Hello is this Andrew? 0:57:21.960 --> 0:57:22.520 Holy shit? 0:57:22.640 --> 0:57:28.120 Wow, Andrew? It says here your work in construction. You 0:57:28.160 --> 0:57:31.400 got into a debate with your coworkers about what direction 0:57:31.640 --> 0:57:35.080 people wipe their ass, and you'd like to share the 0:57:35.120 --> 0:57:38.080 outcome of this debate. Now, first of all, tell me 0:57:39.680 --> 0:57:41.200 what side of the debate were you on? 0:57:44.840 --> 0:57:48.480 Oh shit, man, that was, like, I'm gonna disclaim this 0:57:48.640 --> 0:57:51.880 first off, is like probably the hottest button issue I've 0:57:51.880 --> 0:57:57.120 ever gotten into, Like more so than like vaccinated, unvaccinated, 0:57:57.280 --> 0:58:01.800 fucking whatever set of politics people fall on. This is 0:58:01.920 --> 0:58:06.000 probably the most heated I've ever been in a debate 0:58:06.040 --> 0:58:06.520 in my life. 0:58:06.880 --> 0:58:11.040 And let me ask you a questions. What is First 0:58:11.040 --> 0:58:13.320 of all, tell me when you say that the debate 0:58:13.400 --> 0:58:16.000 is over what direction people wipe their ass, is it 0:58:16.080 --> 0:58:20.080 a binary debate between top to bottom and bottom to 0:58:20.120 --> 0:58:23.040 top or have there been some third parties of left 0:58:23.040 --> 0:58:24.000 to right, right to left. 0:58:27.240 --> 0:58:31.640 I wish I could report that, I'll be honest, not 0:58:31.720 --> 0:58:34.280 too many people wanted to chime in on it, and 0:58:34.360 --> 0:58:37.560 if they did, I think they were bullshitting because they 0:58:37.600 --> 0:58:40.800 seemed to just align with what seemed most normal at 0:58:40.800 --> 0:58:47.000 the time. But it all started when you know, it's construction, 0:58:47.200 --> 0:58:51.880 so like pretty much nothing's off limits. And my boss 0:58:51.960 --> 0:58:56.160 was telling me. This ramps up pretty quickly. He was 0:58:56.160 --> 0:58:58.200 telling me about how his wife shaved his asshole the 0:58:58.240 --> 0:59:03.960 other weekend, and then that pretty much just quickly spiraled 0:59:04.720 --> 0:59:11.760 into like just taking care of yourself down there, I 0:59:11.800 --> 0:59:15.680 guess would be the next thing. And then no one 0:59:15.680 --> 0:59:17.320 ever directly asked the question. 0:59:18.560 --> 0:59:20.320 Don't ever ask the question. 0:59:22.760 --> 0:59:25.640 Yeah, it wasn't ever directly. It was more just like you. 0:59:25.600 --> 0:59:27.640 Have with your boss. It seems like it's very casual 0:59:27.680 --> 0:59:28.720 and very brotherly. 0:59:31.800 --> 0:59:34.760 Yeah, he's he's a couple of years older than me. 0:59:35.440 --> 0:59:40.400 I was his boss on a project like a year 0:59:40.440 --> 0:59:42.560 ago is when it started, and that's when I first 0:59:42.560 --> 0:59:45.960 met him, and we we kind of we bonded, and 0:59:46.000 --> 0:59:48.560 then he actually got promoted. Now he's my boss. 0:59:48.920 --> 0:59:51.560 And I'm like his uh, I'm. 0:59:51.400 --> 0:59:55.680 Like his his fucking super secretary. I guess that's what 0:59:55.720 --> 0:59:56.360 you would call it. 0:59:57.200 --> 0:59:59.400 You guys sound like you're very good friends. So I 0:59:59.400 --> 1:00:01.920 also tell me, so tell me, so tell me what 1:00:02.040 --> 1:00:03.120 side of the debate are you on? 1:00:06.960 --> 1:00:09.200 Dude, I'm gonna I'm gonna spend a lot of people here. 1:00:10.680 --> 1:00:13.720 I am a I'm a back to front wiper, always 1:00:13.760 --> 1:00:14.480 have them. 1:00:14.880 --> 1:00:18.120 And so you're talking about the event, there's probably top 1:00:18.200 --> 1:00:25.440 to bottom. 1:00:21.920 --> 1:00:26.160 Not top to bottom. So that's that's kind of I 1:00:26.200 --> 1:00:30.439 think where the confusion lies. And I know ten thousand people. 1:00:31.040 --> 1:00:32.720 Tell me where does this start? 1:00:35.840 --> 1:00:40.000 So I start on top, just right in the middle, 1:00:40.360 --> 1:00:42.720 just right on it, and. 1:00:42.600 --> 1:00:43.040 It's just. 1:00:44.800 --> 1:00:48.760 It's just like a short, little come hither motion. And 1:00:48.800 --> 1:00:51.560 then I just dropped the paper, you know, and you 1:00:51.280 --> 1:00:54.880 you know, you know what you got. You know, first wipe, 1:00:55.040 --> 1:00:56.360 you know what you got, you know what you're dealing. 1:00:56.880 --> 1:00:58.800 Do you look at the paper before? 1:01:03.120 --> 1:01:07.040 Sometimes? Sometimes not always, Like like I said, you kind 1:01:07.040 --> 1:01:10.880 of know what you got, generally, sure you know. 1:01:11.400 --> 1:01:13.520 And so you're a top to bottom. And then I 1:01:13.560 --> 1:01:18.520 assume that the popular sentiment around town, around the rest 1:01:18.560 --> 1:01:21.439 of your construction work bodies is a sentiment of back 1:01:21.480 --> 1:01:25.400 to front or yes frontman, yes sorry. 1:01:27.440 --> 1:01:30.560 It and it kind of spiraled into like a a 1:01:30.680 --> 1:01:34.280 gender thing for a minute, and I was like, no, no, 1:01:34.720 --> 1:01:38.400 this is strictly on the male side, don't I don't 1:01:38.440 --> 1:01:41.600 advocate any females doing this. And I think that that's 1:01:41.640 --> 1:01:45.680 probably like culturally the most agreed on thing, but for men, 1:01:46.800 --> 1:01:49.160 completely different set of rules. We have a lot more 1:01:49.240 --> 1:01:50.280 room to work with down. 1:01:50.160 --> 1:01:54.360 There, right, because there's a possibility of recur of infection 1:01:55.920 --> 1:01:56.400 for women. 1:01:57.320 --> 1:02:01.760 Absolutely, absolutely absolutely, I. 1:02:01.680 --> 1:02:03.760 Know about the body. 1:02:05.760 --> 1:02:07.640 Yeah, hm hmm. 1:02:08.200 --> 1:02:09.760 So all right, it's all said and done. You had 1:02:09.760 --> 1:02:11.120 a little bit of it in the midst of all this, 1:02:11.800 --> 1:02:12.840 In the midst of all this, tell me. 1:02:13.760 --> 1:02:17.440 So, in the midst of all of it, we had 1:02:17.680 --> 1:02:21.880 unveiled probably some crazier stuff than what I was expecting, 1:02:21.960 --> 1:02:28.120 Like did you know a population of people don't fold 1:02:28.160 --> 1:02:30.520 the paper. There was even a debate on how much 1:02:30.560 --> 1:02:33.240 paper to fold. Some people just wad that ship up. 1:02:34.360 --> 1:02:37.320 Just tell me, he just fucking grabs it and just 1:02:37.720 --> 1:02:41.320 waste paper, just pulls huge, huge water And I'm like, 1:02:41.520 --> 1:02:42.720 that's ridiculous. 1:02:43.080 --> 1:02:44.840 Yes, radio and he. 1:02:46.040 --> 1:02:51.880 To who raised you five times? I use it? Mm hmm. 1:02:52.880 --> 1:02:56.800 That's a good it's pretty good stat Actually, I would 1:02:56.840 --> 1:02:59.640 say for me, it's like once. 1:02:59.480 --> 1:03:02.120 A month once. You only talk a toy that once 1:03:02.200 --> 1:03:02.880 a month. 1:03:05.360 --> 1:03:09.800 Dude, Yeah, that ship pretty frequently, like at least at 1:03:09.880 --> 1:03:10.600 least once a day. 1:03:11.680 --> 1:03:18.280 What are you starting to get? Yeah, Andrew, thank you 1:03:18.280 --> 1:03:20.000 every much for sharing your perspective on this hop ut 1:03:20.040 --> 1:03:20.400 in the ship. 1:03:23.240 --> 1:03:25.720 I hope that uh people don't judge people for this, 1:03:26.040 --> 1:03:29.160 and I hope that it starts a new conversation, you know, 1:03:29.240 --> 1:03:30.800 in the office if if you have the balls to 1:03:30.800 --> 1:03:31.200 bring it. 1:03:31.200 --> 1:03:35.680 Up every weekend goes on the line making your phone calls. 1:03:35.480 --> 1:03:38.640 Every night every week and goes to a d S 1:03:38.680 --> 1:03:39.120 teaching you 1:03:39.120 --> 1:03:42.160 Aloud in your life is not really