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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Dakota and this is Keon, your favorite

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Speaker 1: Okay Storytime host, and we've got some great stories coming

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Speaker 1: right up.

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Speaker 2: But before that, we have a quick two minute break

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Speaker 2: from the sponsors to keep the show alive. My adopted

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Speaker 2: brother said, we're not real family, so I uninvited him

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Speaker 2: from my wedding.

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Speaker 3: Only family comes to my wedding.

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Speaker 2: And there's a trigger warning for substance you. I'm a

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Speaker 2: thirty two year old man and I'm getting married to

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Speaker 2: my longtime girlfriend soon. What should be one of the

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Speaker 2: happiest moments of my life has turned into a heartbreaking

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Speaker 2: ordeal because of a deepening rift in my family. By

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Speaker 2: the way, this comes from Uninvited Brother thirty two. If

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Speaker 2: you want to submit your own stories, go to the

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Speaker 2: r slash Okay Storytime subburdad. I'm Dakota, I'm Sophia, I'm Keon,

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Speaker 2: and we are here to read this story, give good advice, goofly,

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Speaker 2: But we don't have all the answers. We only know

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Speaker 2: what we know, So tell us what you know right

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Speaker 2: now in the comments, and Op says to give you

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Speaker 2: some background, I'm my parents' biological son, and when I

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Speaker 2: was twelve, they adopted two boys who were biological siblings, Jack,

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Speaker 2: who was eight, and Liam, who was five. From the

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Speaker 2: very beginning, it was clear that things were going to

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Speaker 2: be tough. Jack came with severe behavioral issues due to

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Speaker 2: some intense trauma. I'll spare the details, but it was significant.

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Speaker 2: I tried my hardest to be understanding, but living with

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Speaker 2: him was nothing short of exhausting. His outbursts were constant,

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Speaker 2: and I often felt like I was walking on eggshells,

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Speaker 2: terrified of setting him off. As we grew older, I

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Speaker 2: continued to try to be there for Jack despite everything.

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Speaker 2: A few years ago, Jack fell into a devastating substance

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Speaker 2: use disorder. I stood by him through his darkest moments,

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Speaker 2: supporting him through rehab, and doing everything I could to

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Speaker 2: help him get back on his feet. It was draining

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Speaker 2: and heartbreaking, but I did it because I loved him

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Speaker 2: and believed that despite our challenges, we were still brothers. Liam,

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Speaker 2: on the other hand, was always easier to get along with,

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Speaker 2: and I formed a closer bond with him, But even so,

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Speaker 2: I always felt like an outsider. Jack and Liam's bond

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Speaker 2: is by logical siblings, was undeniable, and I never quite

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Speaker 2: felt like I was truly a part of it. It

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Speaker 2: was like I was always on the edge, looking in,

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Speaker 2: trying to be included, but never fully accepted. The situation

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Speaker 2: came to a head recently at a Sunday dinner at

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Speaker 2: my parents' house. My son was working on his summer homework,

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Speaker 2: which involved creating a family tree. He innocently asked Jack

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Speaker 2: if he wanted to be included, and Jack just flat

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Speaker 2: out said no, he didn't want to be part of

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Speaker 2: it because, in his exact words, we're not real brothers.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, ooh.

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Speaker 3: You could tell a child that you're not I'm not

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Speaker 3: related to you, Go go draw something else, and then

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Speaker 3: you ripped their little little paper up.

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Speaker 2: Well, I think it was more he was saying, I'm

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Speaker 2: not related to your dad.

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Speaker 4: He said, I hate you spit in his face.

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Speaker 2: He did. It did have a little bit of it.

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Speaker 2: It did have a little right in the face energy.

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Speaker 2: He said, they look at ah, and that's why we're

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Speaker 2: not family. I spit in your eye. He said it

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Speaker 2: so casually, like it was the most obvious thing in

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Speaker 2: the world, with no regard for how much it would

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Speaker 2: cut me to the core. I was utterly stunned. But

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Speaker 2: what shattered me. Even more was that Liam, who I've

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Speaker 2: always felt closer to, just sat there in silence. He

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Speaker 2: didn't say a word. He didn't defend me or even

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Speaker 2: acknowledge how hurtful Jack's words were. He just let it happen.

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Speaker 2: I've tried so hard to be supportive of both of them,

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Speaker 2: especially Jack, despite the endless challenges. So for Jack to

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Speaker 2: say that and for Liam to do nothing was a

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Speaker 2: shock to the system. It was if they were both

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Speaker 2: telling me, in no uncertain terms that I was never

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Speaker 2: truly part of their family. In my pain and frustration,

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Speaker 2: I decided to uninvite both Jack and Liam from my wedding.

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Speaker 5: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

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Speaker 3: Hold on a minute, Hold on a minute. I'm sorry.

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Speaker 3: Your kid went up to someone to Jack. Your kid

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Speaker 3: went up to Jack and said.

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Speaker 5: Do you want to be part of my family tree?

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Speaker 3: And Jack said, well no, because we're not like really family.

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Speaker 3: And then you said.

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Speaker 4: Both of you are out of my wedding.

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Speaker 3: I'm not gonna have a conversation about it. We're not

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Speaker 3: talking ever again. What have you just meant? Like we're

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Speaker 3: not biologically related? Nah?

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Speaker 1: I feel like the way he said it was pretty

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Speaker 1: spiteful for sure not real. I wish we had a

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Speaker 1: voice recording of it, you know, like how did it

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Speaker 1: sound like we're not real or like we're we're not real?

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Speaker 3: You didn't even talk to them, like yeah, it could

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Speaker 3: have been spiteful or it could have been like somewhat innocuous.

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Speaker 6: We don't know.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I also need to know, like how, like what's

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Speaker 1: going on in his life because maybe he's having a

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Speaker 1: tough time because I again, they were adopted like around

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Speaker 1: eight and five and we fast forward to twelve. Okay,

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Speaker 1: so so math here's thirty two, So they're they're adults.

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Speaker 1: They're not kids.

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Speaker 2: They are adults mid and late twenties. I think Liam

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Speaker 2: probably didn't say anything because he didn't want to make

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Speaker 2: it a big deal. He didn't want to start a

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Speaker 2: whole argument because you said Jack gets a little can

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Speaker 2: be a little feisty.

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Speaker 4: He's a little feisty boy.

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Speaker 2: Maybe he was just like not the time to have

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Speaker 2: Jack blow up at Sunday dinner.

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Speaker 3: Personally, I would have had a conversation with Jack right

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Speaker 3: like after that comment privately and said, hey, I don't

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Speaker 3: really know which I don't understand what you meant by that.

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Speaker 3: I also don't know if it's appropriate to tell my son,

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Speaker 3: you know, we're not real brothers in the way that

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Speaker 3: you did, because no one really cares if his family

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Speaker 3: tree is biologically accurate. He just wants to make little

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Speaker 3: family trees. So we could have had that conversation.

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Speaker 2: My fiance has been nothing but supportive of my decision,

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Speaker 2: but my parents are furious. They've made it clear that

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Speaker 2: if Jack and Liam aren't invited, they won't attend either.

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Speaker 2: Feels like history is repeating itself with my parents once

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Speaker 2: again prioritizing Jack over me, no matter how much it

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Speaker 2: hurts me. I'm absolutely heartbroken that my parents would choose

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Speaker 2: to miss my wedding rather than support me in this.

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Speaker 2: I know Jack has been through a lot, but I've

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Speaker 2: done everything I can to be there for him and

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Speaker 2: for Liam despite all the heartache. And now I feel

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Speaker 2: like I'm the one being punished for finally standing up

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Speaker 2: for myself and setting some boundaries. Yeah. I didn't see

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Speaker 2: a single boundary set there. I just saw you get

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Speaker 2: your feelings hurt and then uninvite both of them from

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Speaker 2: the wedding. So none of that is a boundary. Am

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Speaker 2: I the ahle for uninviting my brothers after they said, well,

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Speaker 2: one of them said they don't see me as families.

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Speaker 3: Also not what they said either, Not for sure.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, even if it means my parents won't come to

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Speaker 2: my wedding, there's an update. Yeah, dude, I don't know.

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Speaker 2: It seems like maybe one conversation could have been had

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Speaker 2: before then, just.

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Speaker 4: One, just one little bitty combo.

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Speaker 2: After hearing from so many of you, I decided I

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Speaker 2: needed to talk to Leo.

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Speaker 6: Wow. Wow.

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Speaker 2: We met up at a pub and I just laid

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Speaker 2: it all out there. How hurt I was when he

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Speaker 2: didn't say anything after Jack made that awful comment about

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Speaker 2: not being real brothers. I was half expecting him to

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Speaker 2: defend himself, but what I got was something entirely different.

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Speaker 2: Liam confessed that he's been living in fear of Jack

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Speaker 2: for years. He told me he kept quiet that night

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Speaker 2: because he was terrified of setting Jack off, not because

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Speaker 2: he agreed with him. Then he dropped a bombshell. Despite

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Speaker 2: being Jack's biological brother, he's felt just as much of

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Speaker 2: an outsider in our family as I have. The constant

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Speaker 2: pressure from our parents to cater to Jack's every whim

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Speaker 2: has worn him down too. Liam assured me that he's

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Speaker 2: always seen me as his brother, and that he regrets

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Speaker 2: not standing up for me sooner.

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Speaker 4: Hey, hey, look, look.

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Speaker 2: Little conversation did Hearing that was a huge relief. He's

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Speaker 2: completely on my side now, and we agreed that if

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Speaker 2: Jack can't respect me as a brother, he has no

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Speaker 2: place at my wedding or in our lives. But just

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Speaker 2: when I thought things couldn't get any more intent, my

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Speaker 2: parents decided to make everything worse.

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Speaker 4: Nice What'd they do?

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Speaker 2: Sensing a theme here, I sat them down and explained

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Speaker 2: why I uninvited Jack, hoping they'd understand. Instead, they threw

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Speaker 2: down an ultimatum. If Jack isn't invited, They're not coming

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Speaker 2: to my wedding. No room for discussion, no empathy, just

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Speaker 2: flat out refusal. I was gutted. After all these years

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Speaker 2: of putting Jack's needs above mine, this is how they

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Speaker 2: repay me. Couldn't hold back anymore. I let out all

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Speaker 2: the anger and frustration I've been bottling up for years.

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Speaker 1: That's gonna be fun, that's gonna be really good, that's

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Speaker 1: gonna be really healthy.

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Speaker 2: M what's the vintage on that bottle? From age twelve?

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Speaker 2: Maybe canna guess? Maybe since the time you were twelve years.

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Speaker 2: This is maybe a twenty year, twenty year vintage on

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Speaker 2: that little bottle.

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Speaker 6: It's gonna taste really really bitter.

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Speaker 2: Mmmmm. I told him how I've always been the one sacrificing,

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Speaker 2: how they've always prioritized Jack, and that I was done

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Speaker 2: being treated like I don't matter. I made it clear

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Speaker 2: that if they choose not to come to my wedding,

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Speaker 2: they're making their choice and I'll make mine. With that,

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Speaker 2: I walked out, leaving them to stew in their own decisions.

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Speaker 2: Out of nowhere, Jack started bombarding me with the nastiest,

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Speaker 2: most hurtful texts I've ever received. He accused me of

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Speaker 2: turning Liam against him, of ripping the family apart, and

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Speaker 2: had the audacity to call me selfish for abandoning.

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Speaker 1: His he's doing what he's doing, what I'm thinking he's doing.

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Speaker 6: Oh, you've turned him against me?

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Speaker 4: Oh no, I've.

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Speaker 2: Done that just south.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, Jack, this is all you, bud.

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Speaker 2: No, honestly, parents, this is all the parents.

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Speaker 3: But in terms of what he's talking about, I feel like.

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Speaker 2: Oh, well, I mean sure, yeah, Jack's behavior not great,

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Speaker 2: But the parents laying down this ultimatum.

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Speaker 6: They've probably been enabling it. Forever, Reva and Ev.

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Speaker 4: But we have the conversation.

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Speaker 3: Now we know Jack stinks, Liam cool parents also stinky.

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Speaker 2: He ranted about how he never felt like he belonged

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Speaker 2: in the family and how it's all my fault for

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Speaker 2: pushing him away. Oh my god, none of you feel

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Speaker 2: like you belong. Maybe that's something to bond over.

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Speaker 3: That's so funny. Everyone's like, we just all don't belong.

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Speaker 4: We're just a bunch of outsiders.

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Speaker 2: His words hit hard, but they also opened my eyes.

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Speaker 2: Jack has spent his whole life blaming everyone else for

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Speaker 2: his problems, and I've been his favorite scapegoat this time,

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Speaker 2: though I'm not letting him guilt trip me. I didn't

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Speaker 2: even respond. I just blocked his number. If you can't

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Speaker 2: see what he's done wrong, then there's nothing more to say.

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Speaker 2: Liam was livid when I told him about Jack's messages.

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Speaker 2: He's more determined than ever to support me, and we've

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Speaker 2: decided to go low contact with our parents until after

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Speaker 2: the wedding. Liam's been a rock through all of this,

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Speaker 2: making sure I'm not dealing with this mess alone. So

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Speaker 2: the wedding is still happening, but with a much smaller

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Speaker 2: guest list. My parents haven't reached out since our argument,

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Speaker 2: and at this point, I don't care if they show

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Speaker 2: up or not. This day is about me and my

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Speaker 2: fiance and I'm not letting anyone, not even my own family,

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Speaker 2: ruin it. And there's another update another week later. Boyo

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Speaker 2: boy oh boy.

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Speaker 3: I think, have your wedding and invite who you want

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Speaker 3: to invite, and there you go.

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Speaker 4: It's your wedding.

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Speaker 3: And if the people that you know, if you don't

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Speaker 3: want to invite Jack and your parents aren't gonna come

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Speaker 3: if you do, or if you don't invite Jack, then

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Speaker 3: they don't come, they make that decision.

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Speaker 2: I feel like there's such a clear path forward to

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Speaker 2: resolution here, though. All three of you just need to

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Speaker 2: sit down and have a vulnerable conversation.

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Speaker 4: That would also help.

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Speaker 2: I don't know if your brother Jack is going to

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Speaker 2: be able to do that, but y'all are all feeling

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Speaker 2: the exact same way about y'all's upbringing. It will get

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Speaker 2: clear about that and then y'all can be on the

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Speaker 2: same team. It's like, dude, I feel the same as you.

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Speaker 2: I feel like when y'all came in, my parents forgot

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Speaker 2: about me and I was on the outside of your thing,

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Speaker 2: but y'all, everyone feels like they're on the outside. Let's

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Speaker 2: all read the outsiders. Two days after the text argument

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Speaker 2: with Jackie reached out to me. I wasn't sure what

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Speaker 2: to expect when he asked if we could meet up,

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Speaker 2: and I was reluctant, but I agreed. When we sat down,

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Speaker 2: the first thing he did was apologize delicious. He told

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Speaker 2: me how sorry he was for what he said to

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Speaker 2: my son and admitted that he didn't know why he

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Speaker 2: said that. Jack seemed genuinely remorseful, and I could tell

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Speaker 2: that he really meant it. This wasn't just another apology

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Speaker 2: to smooth things over. This was different and it felt sincere.

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Speaker 2: After apologizing, Jack took a deep breath and confessed something

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Speaker 2: that I probably should have seen coming. Told me that

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Speaker 2: he had relapsed before the argument even happened. Hearing that

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Speaker 2: hit me hard. He explained so much about his behavior

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Speaker 2: in the weeks leading up to that moment, the irritability,

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Speaker 2: the distance, the way he was withdrawing from everyone. I

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00:13:12,720 --> 00:13:15,840
Speaker 2: realized that I had missed all the signs. I'm not

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Speaker 2: proud to admit it, but I was so caught up

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Speaker 2: in my frustrations with Jack's behaviors and my wedding that

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Speaker 2: I didn't stop to think that something deeper might be

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Speaker 2: going on. Jack's confession wasn't just about the relapse. It

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Speaker 2: was about taking responsibility in a way he's never done before.

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Speaker 2: He went on to tell me that, after realizing the

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Speaker 2: damage he'd caused, he had made the decision to check

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Speaker 2: himself into treatment. This might sound like a typical step,

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Speaker 2: but for Jack it was monumental. In the past, Jack's

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Speaker 2: only gone into treatment because he was either sanctioned by

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Speaker 2: social services and forced into it, or because my parents

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Speaker 2: threatened to boot him out of the house if he

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Speaker 2: didn't get help. But this time he made the decision

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Speaker 2: on his own. That was something he'd never done before,

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Speaker 2: and it showed me that he was serious about wanting

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Speaker 2: to change. He told me that he's doing this because

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Speaker 2: the prospects of losing me his brother was too much

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Speaker 2: and he couldn't handle it. He wants to take this

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Speaker 2: seriously because he wants to show me he can do it.

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Speaker 2: He told me he sees me as his family and

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Speaker 2: he feels so guilty for making me feel like I

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Speaker 2: wasn't his family. Jack has also agreed to start taking

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Speaker 2: medication to help calm his nerves, something he would never

285
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Speaker 2: do before. It's now been about five or six days

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Speaker 2: since Jack checked himself in for treatment, and I've been

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00:14:32,120 --> 00:14:35,760
Speaker 2: visiting him regularly. At first, I went alone because I

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Speaker 2: wasn't sure how my son would feel about seeing Jack

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Speaker 2: so soon after everything that happened. But after a few visits,

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Speaker 2: I felt it was important for my son to see

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Speaker 2: that Jack was making an effort to make things right,

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Speaker 2: so I brought him along and Jack took the opportunity

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Speaker 2: to apologize to him directly. It was a really emotional

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Speaker 2: moment for me as a parent. My son is still

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Speaker 2: young and doesn't fully understand everything that's been going on,

296
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Speaker 2: but he could see that Jack was sorry and that

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00:15:01,320 --> 00:15:03,760
Speaker 2: seemed to make a difference to him. They even spent

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00:15:03,880 --> 00:15:06,640
Speaker 2: some time together just talking and playing, and it felt

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00:15:06,640 --> 00:15:09,720
Speaker 2: like a big step forward for all of us. Throughout

300
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Speaker 2: all of this, my brother Liam has been incredibly supportive.

301
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Speaker 2: We've talked a lot about Jack, and it's clear that

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00:15:16,200 --> 00:15:18,720
Speaker 2: Liam wants him to succeed just as much as I do.

303
00:15:19,640 --> 00:15:21,880
Speaker 2: We both know how much Jack's trauma has affected him,

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Speaker 2: and while it doesn't excuse his behavior, it does help

305
00:15:24,760 --> 00:15:28,800
Speaker 2: us understand why he struggled so much. Having Liam by

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00:15:28,800 --> 00:15:31,120
Speaker 2: my side through all of this has made me feel

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Speaker 2: a lot less alone. Reflecting on everything, I've come to

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Speaker 2: realize that I need to take responsibility for my part

309
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Speaker 2: in how things escalated. In the weeks leading up to

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Speaker 2: the argument, Jack had been doing things that really got

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Speaker 2: under my skin. Instead of addressing it calmly, I let

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00:15:47,800 --> 00:15:51,880
Speaker 2: my frustration build until I finally snapped. Looking back, I

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00:15:51,880 --> 00:15:54,920
Speaker 2: can see that his behaviors were likely tied to his relapse,

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Speaker 2: and I should have seen that sooner. I feel guilty

315
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Speaker 2: for not recognizing the signs for reacting the way I did,

316
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Speaker 2: but I'm trying to focus on what I can do

317
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Speaker 2: to support Jack now that he's taking his recovery seriously.

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Speaker 2: When I wrote my first two posts, I was in

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Speaker 2: a place of deep frustration with Jack, and though nothing

320
00:16:13,920 --> 00:16:17,480
Speaker 2: I said was incorrect or a lie, I definitely painted

321
00:16:17,480 --> 00:16:21,160
Speaker 2: a picture of Jack's most negative moments without everything else.

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Speaker 2: I want to remind everyone about Jack's childhood traumas Liam also,

323
00:16:27,160 --> 00:16:30,240
Speaker 2: but Jack's was a lot more intense. Jack jokes now

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Speaker 2: that he was their biological father's favorite in all the

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00:16:33,720 --> 00:16:37,280
Speaker 2: wrong ways. Jack got into substance use at a pretty

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Speaker 2: young age, but has been clean, or so I thought

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Speaker 2: for a while. I mentioned this before, but Jack has

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00:16:42,480 --> 00:16:44,880
Speaker 2: told me in the past that even now, almost twenty

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Speaker 2: years after he was adopted by our parents, there is

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Speaker 2: not a day where he doesn't think or have nightmares

331
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Speaker 2: about his childhood. He says. The only moment of piece

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Speaker 2: he gets is when he's using. There's a little bit

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00:16:57,960 --> 00:17:01,040
Speaker 2: more uh more story here, But boy, boy, am I

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Speaker 2: glad some conversations happened.

335
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Speaker 4: Huh me too.

336
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Speaker 3: I also think it is funny that he's like, I

337
00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:09,919
Speaker 3: want everyone to remember, like, don't.

338
00:17:09,320 --> 00:17:13,760
Speaker 4: Just judge Jack. You know, he had a really tough child.

339
00:17:13,440 --> 00:17:16,439
Speaker 3: That like we all, I mean at least everyone here,

340
00:17:17,040 --> 00:17:19,000
Speaker 3: we all didn't want to judge Jack.

341
00:17:19,320 --> 00:17:22,040
Speaker 4: You were judge, not to point fingers.

342
00:17:21,600 --> 00:17:24,760
Speaker 1: But like I called it too, I said, something's going

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Speaker 1: on in his life.

344
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Speaker 3: Everyone here was like, hey, maybe talk to him, And

345
00:17:28,640 --> 00:17:32,040
Speaker 3: now you're like, guys, I just needed to talk to him, But.

346
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Speaker 4: I'm glad you did.

347
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Speaker 2: It feels like there hasn't really been a whole lot

348
00:17:34,680 --> 00:17:37,760
Speaker 2: of talking about any of this really complex stuff that's

349
00:17:37,760 --> 00:17:40,640
Speaker 2: been going on in their lives for twenty years at

350
00:17:40,640 --> 00:17:45,120
Speaker 2: all with anyone until now, maybe y'all should all get

351
00:17:45,160 --> 00:17:50,040
Speaker 2: together and do some family therapy. Jack's trauma runs deep,

352
00:17:50,480 --> 00:17:52,800
Speaker 2: and it's something that continued to affect him every day.

353
00:17:53,480 --> 00:17:55,639
Speaker 2: I'm not making excuses for his actions, but I do

354
00:17:55,680 --> 00:17:57,960
Speaker 2: think it's important to remember that he's dealing with a

355
00:17:58,000 --> 00:18:01,560
Speaker 2: lot of pain. Despite everything, I still believe in Jack,

356
00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:04,679
Speaker 2: believe that he has the strength to overcome his past,

357
00:18:04,760 --> 00:18:07,520
Speaker 2: and with Liam and me by his side, I'm hopeful

358
00:18:07,520 --> 00:18:10,200
Speaker 2: that he can get through this. For now, things are

359
00:18:10,200 --> 00:18:13,000
Speaker 2: looking up. Jack is taking his treatment seriously and our

360
00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:16,600
Speaker 2: family is slowly healing. We're taking things one day at

361
00:18:16,640 --> 00:18:19,679
Speaker 2: a time, and I'm committed to supporting Jack as long

362
00:18:19,760 --> 00:18:22,520
Speaker 2: as he's committed to helping himself. Some of you may

363
00:18:22,600 --> 00:18:26,360
Speaker 2: call me weak or naive for thinking this time will

364
00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:28,800
Speaker 2: be different, but I am prepared to take that risk

365
00:18:29,160 --> 00:18:31,879
Speaker 2: one more time for Jack. As he has shown me

366
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Speaker 2: over the last week, he is genuinely wanting treatment and

367
00:18:34,720 --> 00:18:37,200
Speaker 2: he wants to be better. Jack's told me he wants

368
00:18:37,200 --> 00:18:39,560
Speaker 2: to earn back his invite, but not to give it

369
00:18:39,560 --> 00:18:42,239
Speaker 2: to him yet. He said he will prove he deserves it.

370
00:18:42,680 --> 00:18:43,560
Speaker 2: I really hope so.

371
00:18:43,960 --> 00:18:46,520
Speaker 4: Say He's like, I don't even know, don't just give

372
00:18:46,560 --> 00:18:47,840
Speaker 4: it to me. I need to earn it.

373
00:18:47,920 --> 00:18:48,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, let me earn it.

374
00:18:48,920 --> 00:18:52,720
Speaker 3: Give me some trials. I'll do whatever anything.

375
00:18:53,040 --> 00:18:54,879
Speaker 2: I will fight the neman niem.

376
00:18:56,040 --> 00:18:57,320
Speaker 4: I'll fight that one bore.

377
00:18:57,840 --> 00:19:00,159
Speaker 2: And that's the end of this story. Let's head to

378
00:19:00,200 --> 00:19:01,320
Speaker 2: the next one.

379
00:19:01,359 --> 00:19:04,320
Speaker 3: My estrange brother asked me to change my will for

380
00:19:04,440 --> 00:19:06,440
Speaker 3: his son, and I almost laughed.

381
00:19:06,720 --> 00:19:09,119
Speaker 2: That would be a weird thing to do in that situation.

382
00:19:09,560 --> 00:19:10,400
Speaker 6: Do the laugh.

383
00:19:12,320 --> 00:19:12,399
Speaker 1: Now?

384
00:19:12,480 --> 00:19:14,560
Speaker 2: That one wasn't that good. That one wasn't that good.

385
00:19:14,920 --> 00:19:17,040
Speaker 3: A couple of months ago, during a phone call about

386
00:19:17,040 --> 00:19:21,120
Speaker 3: our aging parents, my fifty five female brothers sixty male

387
00:19:21,520 --> 00:19:24,920
Speaker 3: with whom I am not close, asked me to consider

388
00:19:24,960 --> 00:19:28,400
Speaker 3: making his son Daniel, the beneficiary of my estate when

389
00:19:28,400 --> 00:19:32,520
Speaker 3: I pass away. It was an incredibly awkward conversation. By

390
00:19:32,560 --> 00:19:35,080
Speaker 3: the way, this comes from prop and quitocity. And if

391
00:19:35,080 --> 00:19:36,480
Speaker 3: you want to smit your own stories, go to the

392
00:19:36,600 --> 00:19:38,400
Speaker 3: r slash. Okay, story time separated.

393
00:19:38,480 --> 00:19:41,240
Speaker 2: I'm Sophia, I'm Dakota, I'm keon Ed.

394
00:19:41,280 --> 00:19:43,080
Speaker 3: We're here to give good advice, goofy, but we don't

395
00:19:43,080 --> 00:19:44,120
Speaker 3: have all the answers.

396
00:19:44,160 --> 00:19:46,000
Speaker 4: We only know what we'd do. So let us know

397
00:19:46,000 --> 00:19:46,399
Speaker 4: what you would do.

398
00:19:46,440 --> 00:19:49,480
Speaker 3: In the comments and op he says it went like this,

399
00:19:50,359 --> 00:19:52,440
Speaker 3: him to switch gears a little.

400
00:19:52,480 --> 00:19:52,640
Speaker 5: Now.

401
00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:55,240
Speaker 4: I was wondering, if, given your closest to Daniel and

402
00:19:55,320 --> 00:19:56,560
Speaker 4: the fact that you're leaving.

403
00:19:56,280 --> 00:19:59,439
Speaker 3: Your estate to a neighbor, would you consider making Daniel

404
00:19:59,480 --> 00:20:01,600
Speaker 3: the beneficial of your estate in your will.

405
00:20:02,160 --> 00:20:07,639
Speaker 2: Oh gosh, bag, my state is being split between my

406
00:20:07,680 --> 00:20:10,560
Speaker 2: three longest, closest friends who have been with me through

407
00:20:10,600 --> 00:20:13,240
Speaker 2: thick and thin. Not sure why you. I'm not sure

408
00:20:13,280 --> 00:20:15,040
Speaker 2: where you got the neighbor idea from.

409
00:20:15,480 --> 00:20:18,359
Speaker 3: Oh okay, I thought you were leaving everything to your neighbor.

410
00:20:18,440 --> 00:20:22,000
Speaker 2: Hmm Nope, yeah, not sure where you got that.

411
00:20:22,400 --> 00:20:24,480
Speaker 3: I don't recall the rest of the conversation because it

412
00:20:24,560 --> 00:20:27,159
Speaker 3: was just so bizarre that I stopped processing it.

413
00:20:27,760 --> 00:20:31,440
Speaker 2: Well, that's the conversation ended right there where he went, Oh,

414
00:20:31,520 --> 00:20:34,640
Speaker 2: you're not just leaving everything to your neighbor. Okay, Well

415
00:20:34,680 --> 00:20:38,320
Speaker 2: then there's nothing to talk about. Okay, some more information.

416
00:20:38,560 --> 00:20:41,560
Speaker 3: I was not able to have kids. Eventually, my nineteen

417
00:20:41,640 --> 00:20:44,119
Speaker 3: year marriage broke up over it, and I am now single.

418
00:20:44,800 --> 00:20:47,840
Speaker 3: My nephew, Daniel, now twenty eight, male only child, has

419
00:20:47,880 --> 00:20:50,880
Speaker 3: Asperger's and ADHD and is currently not working.

420
00:20:51,640 --> 00:20:52,520
Speaker 4: Daniel's mother.

421
00:20:52,720 --> 00:20:56,200
Speaker 3: My brother's ex wife recently passed away and left him

422
00:20:56,320 --> 00:20:59,120
Speaker 3: some money, which I guess is where my brother got

423
00:20:59,119 --> 00:21:03,439
Speaker 3: the brilliant idea that passed away people have value. My

424
00:21:03,640 --> 00:21:07,280
Speaker 3: brother and I aren't particularly close and never have been.

425
00:21:07,480 --> 00:21:10,000
Speaker 3: He knows very little about my life. Clearly you thought

426
00:21:10,040 --> 00:21:11,920
Speaker 3: you were giving all your money to a neighbor, and

427
00:21:12,080 --> 00:21:15,280
Speaker 3: doesn't ask unless it pertains the money that you have.

428
00:21:15,880 --> 00:21:18,960
Speaker 3: He's always been very critical of me. Two years ago,

429
00:21:19,040 --> 00:21:21,920
Speaker 3: when my nephew, Daniel was borrowing my brother's car to

430
00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:26,200
Speaker 3: drive his new wife's adult kids to university, Daniel's own

431
00:21:26,240 --> 00:21:28,040
Speaker 3: car was in the shop, but he wanted to help.

432
00:21:28,600 --> 00:21:31,280
Speaker 3: Daniel was just one state away and only a four

433
00:21:31,320 --> 00:21:34,159
Speaker 3: hour drive from where I lived, so Daniel asked his

434
00:21:34,240 --> 00:21:37,240
Speaker 3: dad for permission to drive his dad's car just a

435
00:21:37,240 --> 00:21:40,080
Speaker 3: bit further so he could visit his favorite aunt.

436
00:21:40,840 --> 00:21:44,000
Speaker 4: My brother said no. When my nephew pressed him, saying

437
00:21:44,040 --> 00:21:46,320
Speaker 4: it was my birthday and that I'm probably lonely. My

438
00:21:46,359 --> 00:21:50,359
Speaker 4: brother said she chose to live there. The reason my

439
00:21:50,440 --> 00:21:53,879
Speaker 4: nephew calls me his favorite aunt is because I understand

440
00:21:53,920 --> 00:21:56,160
Speaker 4: the crap he went through with his dad. My brother

441
00:21:56,760 --> 00:22:01,040
Speaker 4: and our struggles are incredibly similar. We share some Nerdi

442
00:22:01,119 --> 00:22:04,600
Speaker 4: virgent elements and were parented the same way. While Daniel

443
00:22:04,680 --> 00:22:07,360
Speaker 4: was growing up, I was always trying to run interference

444
00:22:07,400 --> 00:22:10,560
Speaker 4: to save him from the emotional distress from my brother.

445
00:22:11,200 --> 00:22:12,520
Speaker 4: My brother is now married to.

446
00:22:12,480 --> 00:22:17,640
Speaker 3: An incredibly wealthy woman. Her house alone is worth actual millions,

447
00:22:17,720 --> 00:22:21,800
Speaker 3: and presumably her estate is substantial as well, since she

448
00:22:21,920 --> 00:22:23,760
Speaker 3: is in a very lucrative line of work with a

449
00:22:23,760 --> 00:22:27,840
Speaker 3: full pension and has been saving money for decades. My

450
00:22:27,960 --> 00:22:30,520
Speaker 3: own house is not even worth two hundred thousand dollars,

451
00:22:30,560 --> 00:22:33,240
Speaker 3: and my estate, quote unquote is a drop in the

452
00:22:33,280 --> 00:22:36,160
Speaker 3: bucket compared to what his second wife is worth. I

453
00:22:36,280 --> 00:22:40,000
Speaker 3: just feel it's so cringe and inappropriate that he asked

454
00:22:40,040 --> 00:22:42,679
Speaker 3: me to make his son the beneficiary of my estate,

455
00:22:43,200 --> 00:22:45,960
Speaker 3: the son he despised and that I tried to save.

456
00:22:46,080 --> 00:22:49,400
Speaker 2: Well. I mean, okay, can you really are you? Are

457
00:22:49,440 --> 00:22:52,720
Speaker 2: you sure? You can't? You wait? Hold on, You can't

458
00:22:52,760 --> 00:22:56,000
Speaker 2: paint any kind of picture, like maybe the picture that

459
00:22:56,080 --> 00:22:58,680
Speaker 2: he thought you were giving everything to a neighbor who's

460
00:22:58,720 --> 00:23:02,400
Speaker 2: not related to you at all, that maybe it's like, hey,

461
00:23:02,520 --> 00:23:06,359
Speaker 2: maybe you're you're whatever you got can go to the

462
00:23:06,640 --> 00:23:09,440
Speaker 2: kid I have who you've always cared about that doesn't

463
00:23:09,480 --> 00:23:12,399
Speaker 2: make any sense at all to you, because you can't

464
00:23:12,440 --> 00:23:15,760
Speaker 2: take it with you. Once you're gone, it's gone. If

465
00:23:15,760 --> 00:23:19,200
Speaker 2: the neighbors got it, the neighbors got it. But hey, Daniel, Hello,

466
00:23:19,480 --> 00:23:22,080
Speaker 2: Remember Daniel, the guy you like and care about.

467
00:23:22,119 --> 00:23:22,399
Speaker 5: Hello.

468
00:23:23,160 --> 00:23:25,880
Speaker 3: I feel like for you to say, oh, well, why

469
00:23:25,960 --> 00:23:29,879
Speaker 3: would maya estrange brother ask me for money? It makes

470
00:23:29,920 --> 00:23:33,320
Speaker 3: a little bit more sense when it's about Yeah, when

471
00:23:33,320 --> 00:23:35,760
Speaker 3: it's about Daniel, who you clearly have a relationship with

472
00:23:36,280 --> 00:23:39,000
Speaker 3: and maybe you know, I don't know, would you consider

473
00:23:39,640 --> 00:23:43,480
Speaker 3: not necessarily making him the beneficiary but splitting up some

474
00:23:43,680 --> 00:23:47,080
Speaker 3: of that, you know, inheritance.

475
00:23:46,960 --> 00:23:50,120
Speaker 6: There's always next, next one, right, the next next life.

476
00:23:50,400 --> 00:23:53,440
Speaker 2: Wait a minute, someone had a great theory Melissa, and

477
00:23:53,520 --> 00:23:55,760
Speaker 2: the YouTube comments who wants to bet the new wife's

478
00:23:55,760 --> 00:24:01,879
Speaker 2: not putting Daniel in her will? Mmmmm that might be yeah.

479
00:24:01,280 --> 00:24:02,560
Speaker 4: I bet it. I bet so.

480
00:24:03,040 --> 00:24:04,239
Speaker 6: But that in your will? I bet it?

481
00:24:05,040 --> 00:24:05,560
Speaker 4: I bet it.

482
00:24:06,040 --> 00:24:08,520
Speaker 3: I feel such shame even telling anyone about this, but

483
00:24:08,560 --> 00:24:10,960
Speaker 3: I also can't stop thinking about it. Would I be

484
00:24:11,080 --> 00:24:13,600
Speaker 3: da O if I confronted my brother about how effed

485
00:24:13,680 --> 00:24:16,119
Speaker 3: up the request was? I could say, you know, that

486
00:24:16,240 --> 00:24:18,200
Speaker 3: was really inappropriate that you asked me to make your

487
00:24:18,200 --> 00:24:20,280
Speaker 3: son the beneficiary of my estate when you don't know

488
00:24:20,320 --> 00:24:23,000
Speaker 3: where I live, don't know where I work, have never

489
00:24:23,080 --> 00:24:25,680
Speaker 3: visited me here, and have mainly held me in contempt

490
00:24:25,720 --> 00:24:28,080
Speaker 3: over the years. And the only thing I have that

491
00:24:28,119 --> 00:24:30,120
Speaker 3: connects me to your son is that we both had

492
00:24:30,160 --> 00:24:33,640
Speaker 3: crappy parents? Or should I just work on letting it go?

493
00:24:33,880 --> 00:24:36,720
Speaker 3: Probably that one you don't have a relationship with him.

494
00:24:36,800 --> 00:24:38,360
Speaker 3: If you don't have a relationship with him, I don't

495
00:24:38,400 --> 00:24:40,920
Speaker 3: think you need to, you know, call him out on it,

496
00:24:41,520 --> 00:24:42,200
Speaker 3: just ignore him.

497
00:24:42,640 --> 00:24:46,000
Speaker 2: Is it maybe just an attempt to I don't know,

498
00:24:46,560 --> 00:24:49,920
Speaker 2: take the only thing he thinks of you in that

499
00:24:50,000 --> 00:24:52,800
Speaker 2: you have some kind of value. Like also maybe but

500
00:24:53,000 --> 00:24:56,000
Speaker 2: like yeah, just let it go, doesn't really matter.

501
00:24:56,480 --> 00:24:58,679
Speaker 3: I'm just so appalled that he has no use for

502
00:24:58,720 --> 00:25:03,119
Speaker 3: me when I'm alive, but god, if I am not alive,

503
00:25:03,480 --> 00:25:05,400
Speaker 3: he wants me to leave my money to his son

504
00:25:05,480 --> 00:25:07,640
Speaker 3: to make up for his crap job of parenting.

505
00:25:08,359 --> 00:25:09,640
Speaker 4: And we've got an update.

506
00:25:10,040 --> 00:25:13,920
Speaker 2: I don't even know if that's the rationale there. He

507
00:25:13,960 --> 00:25:16,679
Speaker 2: either probably wants the money for himself or he just

508
00:25:16,880 --> 00:25:20,560
Speaker 2: was like, hey, maybe don't give that to a stranger,

509
00:25:20,640 --> 00:25:24,240
Speaker 2: give that to Daniel who you've cared about your whole life.

510
00:25:24,480 --> 00:25:26,320
Speaker 3: I mean, I don't even think it matters whether or

511
00:25:26,359 --> 00:25:28,920
Speaker 3: not he was doing it maliciously or whether or not

512
00:25:29,040 --> 00:25:31,399
Speaker 3: he was just, you know, trying to take care of Daniel.

513
00:25:32,440 --> 00:25:35,160
Speaker 3: He's not in your life. Like if a stranger calls

514
00:25:35,160 --> 00:25:38,560
Speaker 3: me up and says, hey, I want money, I go.

515
00:25:39,359 --> 00:25:41,800
Speaker 2: No, Bernie stopped calling me.

516
00:25:41,720 --> 00:25:43,680
Speaker 4: Bernie, stop it. I don't call him back and say,

517
00:25:43,720 --> 00:25:44,119
Speaker 4: Bernie that.

518
00:25:44,119 --> 00:25:48,800
Speaker 2: Really we're family running anymore. Bernie, I can't keep giving

519
00:25:48,840 --> 00:25:49,760
Speaker 2: you five Toia.

520
00:25:49,880 --> 00:25:55,879
Speaker 1: I'm your cousin's like best friend. His roommate twice removed

521
00:25:56,119 --> 00:25:58,760
Speaker 1: that I haven't talked to them in like a gazillion years.

522
00:25:58,760 --> 00:26:00,440
Speaker 1: But I heard you got money that work.

523
00:26:00,920 --> 00:26:01,200
Speaker 5: No.

524
00:26:01,640 --> 00:26:04,440
Speaker 3: Oh, and while we're at it, it was really rude

525
00:26:04,480 --> 00:26:07,320
Speaker 3: of me to ask, and we've got an update. Thank

526
00:26:07,359 --> 00:26:10,399
Speaker 3: you everyone for your kind and thoughtful comments. I replied

527
00:26:10,440 --> 00:26:14,240
Speaker 3: to many of you, I have a plan now, a

528
00:26:14,359 --> 00:26:17,080
Speaker 3: plan that doesn't sound like you're staying out of it.

529
00:26:17,600 --> 00:26:21,359
Speaker 3: Most folks suggested I let it go, and I will,

530
00:26:22,040 --> 00:26:25,600
Speaker 3: but I first need to process my feelings. How I

531
00:26:25,640 --> 00:26:28,000
Speaker 3: will use the empty chair technique to say what I

532
00:26:28,040 --> 00:26:29,640
Speaker 3: need to say to my brother, just to.

533
00:26:29,600 --> 00:26:30,120
Speaker 4: Get it out.

534
00:26:30,200 --> 00:26:33,560
Speaker 3: Okay, okay, so you are letting it go, but you

535
00:26:33,640 --> 00:26:36,120
Speaker 3: are speaking to a empty chair first, as if.

536
00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:36,680
Speaker 2: It was your brother.

537
00:26:36,720 --> 00:26:41,880
Speaker 1: I would assume that's like ask do you need the chair?

538
00:26:42,400 --> 00:26:45,360
Speaker 3: Yes, the chair is important. It's like when engineers use

539
00:26:45,480 --> 00:26:49,680
Speaker 3: rubber duckies to explain code or no computer engineers.

540
00:26:49,440 --> 00:26:51,600
Speaker 2: Specifically they talk to they talked to the duck.

541
00:26:51,880 --> 00:26:52,760
Speaker 4: Yeah.

542
00:26:52,920 --> 00:26:55,359
Speaker 3: I will not confront him, I ral as it's not

543
00:26:55,480 --> 00:26:57,679
Speaker 3: worth the blow up that will result and the further

544
00:26:57,960 --> 00:27:00,000
Speaker 3: ruptured the rapture.

545
00:27:00,320 --> 00:27:07,040
Speaker 2: Uh, it's gone. A relationship was sent to heaven.

546
00:27:06,440 --> 00:27:10,600
Speaker 3: And the further ruptured relationship. I'm already fairly low contact

547
00:27:10,640 --> 00:27:12,840
Speaker 3: with him because I just don't need this crap. But

548
00:27:12,920 --> 00:27:16,560
Speaker 3: I do need to pop the ZiT of my internal

549
00:27:16,640 --> 00:27:22,560
Speaker 3: discomfort that made me discomfortable uncomfortable, which I will do

550
00:27:22,720 --> 00:27:26,240
Speaker 3: in private through a structured activity. I will also pre

551
00:27:26,400 --> 00:27:28,359
Speaker 3: contemplate what to say if he asks me.

552
00:27:28,520 --> 00:27:31,159
Speaker 2: Again, thought I'm having right now has nothing to do

553
00:27:31,240 --> 00:27:34,159
Speaker 2: with this story. Really. Yeah, it's more just like, wouldn't

554
00:27:34,200 --> 00:27:36,360
Speaker 2: it be great if you could just cast like rapture

555
00:27:36,840 --> 00:27:41,879
Speaker 2: and then someone's just like what, it's not even a

556
00:27:41,920 --> 00:27:44,920
Speaker 2: bad thing because theoretically, I mean, you just go to heaven.

557
00:27:45,480 --> 00:27:47,800
Speaker 2: That's really what that is supposed to be. But that

558
00:27:47,840 --> 00:27:51,720
Speaker 2: made Yeah, that's my thought, which is what you should think.

559
00:27:52,000 --> 00:27:54,520
Speaker 2: Like why would I mean, there's nothing to think about here?

560
00:27:54,560 --> 00:27:57,520
Speaker 2: He said something weird. He's your strange brother. If he

561
00:27:57,560 --> 00:28:01,879
Speaker 2: calls you again, just be like, yo, are you good?

562
00:28:01,960 --> 00:28:04,439
Speaker 2: Like what are you? Is your wife not rich and

563
00:28:04,520 --> 00:28:06,720
Speaker 2: giving you money? Like? What are you trying to take mine?

564
00:28:06,760 --> 00:28:08,399
Speaker 2: For some reason? What's going on? Sorry?

565
00:28:08,440 --> 00:28:09,159
Speaker 4: No soliciting?

566
00:28:09,280 --> 00:28:10,879
Speaker 2: Thank you? Do you maybe want to, like, I don't know,

567
00:28:10,960 --> 00:28:13,600
Speaker 2: go get lunch or something before you ask me to,

568
00:28:13,920 --> 00:28:14,880
Speaker 2: you know, take.

569
00:28:14,720 --> 00:28:17,399
Speaker 3: Me at you adain, before you take my money.

570
00:28:17,160 --> 00:28:19,640
Speaker 2: Before I give you all of my earthly belongings.

571
00:28:19,920 --> 00:28:20,920
Speaker 6: Talk to your chair brother.

572
00:28:21,400 --> 00:28:24,000
Speaker 3: I'm making an appointment with a state lawyer to make

573
00:28:24,040 --> 00:28:27,000
Speaker 3: my wishes ironclad and to make sure I've crossed my

574
00:28:27,119 --> 00:28:30,840
Speaker 3: t's and dotted my eyes. I have investments that paid

575
00:28:30,840 --> 00:28:33,240
Speaker 3: off home and other assets, and I want these dealt

576
00:28:33,240 --> 00:28:36,200
Speaker 3: with in accordance with my wishes. Upon my passing, my

577
00:28:36,320 --> 00:28:38,880
Speaker 3: chosen family is my priority for disbursement.

578
00:28:39,320 --> 00:28:39,960
Speaker 4: But I am.

579
00:28:39,920 --> 00:28:44,040
Speaker 3: Considering including my nephew somehow through a trust and no

580
00:28:44,080 --> 00:28:46,080
Speaker 3: one will know about this. Accept my lawyer and me

581
00:28:46,480 --> 00:28:49,720
Speaker 3: and some if then statements, I e. What if my

582
00:28:49,800 --> 00:28:52,760
Speaker 3: friends pass before me? I do have to work through

583
00:28:52,800 --> 00:28:57,280
Speaker 3: some negative feelings first. However, regarding my brother, everything is

584
00:28:57,320 --> 00:29:00,640
Speaker 3: actually much worse than I indicated here. I need to

585
00:29:00,720 --> 00:29:05,480
Speaker 3: work on my boundaries. Thank you everyone, and that's it. Oh,

586
00:29:05,520 --> 00:29:06,880
Speaker 3: he's done over.

587
00:29:07,080 --> 00:29:11,040
Speaker 2: Now we're done here, and that's the end of this story.

588
00:29:11,320 --> 00:29:12,480
Speaker 2: Let's head to the next one.

589
00:29:13,040 --> 00:29:14,920
Speaker 6: Hey, key on here, we're going to get back to

590
00:29:14,960 --> 00:29:17,640
Speaker 6: the stories. But here's three minutes of ads from our sponsors.

591
00:29:17,960 --> 00:29:20,520
Speaker 2: My daughter called me a Karen in public, so I

592
00:29:20,600 --> 00:29:22,280
Speaker 2: took back her birthday gift.

593
00:29:22,400 --> 00:29:23,600
Speaker 5: I'm not a Karen.

594
00:29:24,880 --> 00:29:27,920
Speaker 2: So last week, me, my wife, and two kids went

595
00:29:27,960 --> 00:29:30,920
Speaker 2: out to the zoo for my daughter's twenty third birthday.

596
00:29:31,280 --> 00:29:34,280
Speaker 2: We were having a great time. While leaving an enclosure,

597
00:29:34,960 --> 00:29:38,160
Speaker 2: some woman sort of cut us off and pushed in

598
00:29:38,200 --> 00:29:40,960
Speaker 2: front of us to get out first. She didn't actually

599
00:29:41,000 --> 00:29:43,280
Speaker 2: touch us, and it wasn't that big of a deal,

600
00:29:43,400 --> 00:29:47,080
Speaker 2: but it was a little obnoxious, and I said, there's

601
00:29:47,080 --> 00:29:50,200
Speaker 2: no need to push ahead. Love. She responded with something like,

602
00:29:50,600 --> 00:29:52,560
Speaker 2: how did I push ahead? It's not like there's a queue.

603
00:29:53,320 --> 00:29:56,160
Speaker 2: I just tutted and thought whatever, not worth it.

604
00:29:56,640 --> 00:29:57,360
Speaker 3: By the way, this.

605
00:29:57,240 --> 00:30:00,200
Speaker 2: Comes from out Rage's Penn sixty two ninety. If you

606
00:30:00,200 --> 00:30:01,800
Speaker 2: want us to make your own stories, go to the

607
00:30:01,880 --> 00:30:04,680
Speaker 2: r slash Okay storytime subrendit. I'm Dakota, I'm.

608
00:30:04,560 --> 00:30:05,680
Speaker 6: Sophia, I'm Keon.

609
00:30:06,000 --> 00:30:08,240
Speaker 2: We're gonna read this story and we're gonna have thoughts.

610
00:30:08,600 --> 00:30:11,160
Speaker 2: We're just saying out loud. You get to tell us

611
00:30:11,240 --> 00:30:15,440
Speaker 2: your thoughts in the comments. Isn't this beautiful little reciprocal relationship?

612
00:30:15,440 --> 00:30:19,520
Speaker 2: We are oh crazy? And op says, But then some

613
00:30:19,840 --> 00:30:23,760
Speaker 2: giant guy who was apparently her son. I didn't realize

614
00:30:23,840 --> 00:30:26,920
Speaker 2: this because they looked very different, like she was white

615
00:30:26,920 --> 00:30:29,480
Speaker 2: and he was mixed. None that that matters, not that

616
00:30:29,680 --> 00:30:30,560
Speaker 2: the mad is.

617
00:30:30,840 --> 00:30:33,920
Speaker 3: But they didn't look nothing like each other. How is

618
00:30:33,960 --> 00:30:35,120
Speaker 3: I supposed to know?

619
00:30:35,760 --> 00:30:38,920
Speaker 2: This guy says to her, what does someone have a problem?

620
00:30:38,920 --> 00:30:39,200
Speaker 3: Mom?

621
00:30:39,640 --> 00:30:41,280
Speaker 2: And she pointed me out.

622
00:30:41,200 --> 00:30:44,640
Speaker 3: That's so weird. Wait, that's so weird. Opie's like, hey, no,

623
00:30:44,720 --> 00:30:46,080
Speaker 3: need to push ahead, and she's.

624
00:30:46,040 --> 00:30:47,400
Speaker 4: Like, how am I pushing a head?

625
00:30:47,440 --> 00:30:50,400
Speaker 3: And she's like okay, and then he's like someone.

626
00:30:50,840 --> 00:30:54,440
Speaker 2: The bulls are wants to know if someone has a problem.

627
00:30:55,040 --> 00:30:59,480
Speaker 2: Her son then turned around and started aggressively antagonizing me

628
00:30:59,560 --> 00:31:02,520
Speaker 2: for no re telling me to keep my comments to myself,

629
00:31:02,880 --> 00:31:05,920
Speaker 2: called me a witch, a Karen, and he kept calling

630
00:31:05,960 --> 00:31:09,000
Speaker 2: me tiny, saying I had little man syndrome.

631
00:31:09,440 --> 00:31:10,640
Speaker 4: You've been a man this whole time.

632
00:31:10,840 --> 00:31:12,280
Speaker 2: You've been a man this whole time.

633
00:31:12,680 --> 00:31:16,760
Speaker 3: Oh, tiny man, trying to pick on my mom.

634
00:31:16,960 --> 00:31:20,640
Speaker 2: Oh, you're a little man poking to my mom.

635
00:31:21,160 --> 00:31:24,880
Speaker 1: What's the Karen version of a male Ken?

636
00:31:25,040 --> 00:31:27,960
Speaker 3: I think it's supposed to be Kevin Reddit.

637
00:31:28,200 --> 00:31:28,880
Speaker 6: I think it's Kevin.

638
00:31:29,040 --> 00:31:32,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, Ky, you think that you're better than my mom.

639
00:31:32,720 --> 00:31:34,240
Speaker 2: You've got tiny little hands.

640
00:31:34,320 --> 00:31:37,600
Speaker 3: They probably couldn't hold an avocado, they're so small and.

641
00:31:37,760 --> 00:31:40,560
Speaker 2: Just really off the wall stuff for what I thought

642
00:31:40,640 --> 00:31:43,840
Speaker 2: was a benign comment. Then, for some reason, my daughter,

643
00:31:43,920 --> 00:31:46,080
Speaker 2: twenty two female, felt the need to take up for

644
00:31:46,120 --> 00:31:49,680
Speaker 2: this guy and started saying stuff like why are you

645
00:31:49,800 --> 00:31:51,680
Speaker 2: like this? Why do you feel that need us ice

646
00:31:51,720 --> 00:31:54,880
Speaker 2: a thing? And then started apologizing to the guy and

647
00:31:54,960 --> 00:31:56,720
Speaker 2: agreed with him that I'm a Karen.

648
00:31:57,360 --> 00:32:01,560
Speaker 3: What okay? If you unless you are to us, unless

649
00:32:01,560 --> 00:32:03,240
Speaker 3: you are lying to us, which you could be, but

650
00:32:03,280 --> 00:32:07,080
Speaker 3: I hope you're not. That's crazy. That's actually crazy.

651
00:32:07,440 --> 00:32:11,840
Speaker 2: I'm gonna say the opposite though. Oh, given everything we

652
00:32:11,880 --> 00:32:14,440
Speaker 2: heard in the story, right everyone's trying to get out

653
00:32:14,440 --> 00:32:16,400
Speaker 2: of this place. Everyone wants to get out of the

654
00:32:16,400 --> 00:32:19,880
Speaker 2: place the same way. This person just gets ahead of you,

655
00:32:20,040 --> 00:32:22,840
Speaker 2: cuts in front of you, didn't jostly, you didn't even bump,

656
00:32:22,880 --> 00:32:25,560
Speaker 2: you didn't even touch you. That's what you said. But

657
00:32:25,600 --> 00:32:28,120
Speaker 2: there's that little part of you who was like, well

658
00:32:28,160 --> 00:32:30,240
Speaker 2: that was annoying, and I have to say something out loud.

659
00:32:30,600 --> 00:32:34,720
Speaker 3: But does it really like necessitate getting your big old

660
00:32:34,800 --> 00:32:37,120
Speaker 3: son to start being like you witch?

661
00:32:37,920 --> 00:32:39,040
Speaker 4: You freaking it?

662
00:32:39,120 --> 00:32:39,520
Speaker 5: Totally?

663
00:32:39,800 --> 00:32:43,560
Speaker 2: It totally doesn't necessitate that, however, and then and then

664
00:32:43,600 --> 00:32:49,240
Speaker 2: you're wait, it is within the vein of like me,

665
00:32:49,640 --> 00:32:53,800
Speaker 2: and that is very Karen is a p a man

666
00:32:53,960 --> 00:32:54,480
Speaker 2: or a woman.

667
00:32:55,080 --> 00:32:58,720
Speaker 1: We haven't so last week me my wife and two kids,

668
00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:00,240
Speaker 1: so we haven't got the actual.

669
00:33:00,040 --> 00:33:02,840
Speaker 3: Okay, okay, so you're they're calling you male Karen. Yeah,

670
00:33:02,840 --> 00:33:03,920
Speaker 3: because they said little man.

671
00:33:03,960 --> 00:33:05,440
Speaker 4: But then I got confused by the Karen.

672
00:33:05,600 --> 00:33:06,600
Speaker 6: Okay, yeah, exactly.

673
00:33:07,360 --> 00:33:10,840
Speaker 2: I was really taken aback by this. Then the guy

674
00:33:10,880 --> 00:33:13,280
Speaker 2: asks how old she is and she tells him, and

675
00:33:13,320 --> 00:33:15,920
Speaker 2: he asks for her number and she gives it to him.

676
00:33:16,000 --> 00:33:19,600
Speaker 3: Okay, this is like the this is is this crazy

677
00:33:19,680 --> 00:33:23,400
Speaker 3: stupid love? Because I think Ryan gosling just put you

678
00:33:23,520 --> 00:33:27,760
Speaker 3: down and took your daughter. What just happened?

679
00:33:28,440 --> 00:33:30,280
Speaker 2: He hands his phone over to her and she types

680
00:33:30,280 --> 00:33:32,760
Speaker 2: in her number. The whole time, this guy is staring

681
00:33:32,800 --> 00:33:36,160
Speaker 2: at me with a nice big grin on his face.

682
00:33:36,840 --> 00:33:39,040
Speaker 2: When my daughter comes back over to us, I ask

683
00:33:39,120 --> 00:33:42,080
Speaker 2: her what the heck was that, and she just says, what,

684
00:33:42,240 --> 00:33:43,760
Speaker 2: he's cute and you need to be put in your

685
00:33:43,800 --> 00:33:46,920
Speaker 2: place every once in a while. I said, since that's

686
00:33:46,960 --> 00:33:49,800
Speaker 2: what she thinks she can buy her own car for

687
00:33:49,840 --> 00:33:51,479
Speaker 2: her birthday, you gotta be honest.

688
00:33:51,600 --> 00:33:55,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, so for real, Yeah, you don't get a car.

689
00:33:56,960 --> 00:33:59,000
Speaker 2: I wonder if your new boyfriend can buy you a

690
00:33:59,040 --> 00:34:01,880
Speaker 2: car for your birthday because I'm taking yours back to

691
00:34:01,920 --> 00:34:02,400
Speaker 2: the lot.

692
00:34:02,560 --> 00:34:05,840
Speaker 3: I'm like, so on up side right now? That's crazy.

693
00:34:06,240 --> 00:34:07,000
Speaker 2: Oh my god.

694
00:34:07,240 --> 00:34:07,560
Speaker 4: Wow.

695
00:34:08,080 --> 00:34:10,520
Speaker 2: She clearly thought I wasn't serious, because when she asked

696
00:34:10,520 --> 00:34:12,839
Speaker 2: if we can look at cars, I told her she

697
00:34:12,840 --> 00:34:15,440
Speaker 2: can look herself because I'm still not paying for it.

698
00:34:15,920 --> 00:34:19,160
Speaker 2: This has divided my house, with my son taking my side.

699
00:34:18,880 --> 00:34:22,560
Speaker 3: Well understands who buys people cars, he gets.

700
00:34:22,320 --> 00:34:24,680
Speaker 2: It, and my wife saying it's not worth ruining my

701
00:34:24,719 --> 00:34:27,600
Speaker 2: relationship with her over I feel like if not getting

702
00:34:27,640 --> 00:34:30,160
Speaker 2: her a car as punishment is enough to ruin her

703
00:34:30,239 --> 00:34:34,320
Speaker 2: relationship with me, then I probably spoiled her too much. Anyway,

704
00:34:34,920 --> 00:34:38,600
Speaker 2: I fully agree with that crazy She's like, it's just

705
00:34:38,640 --> 00:34:42,160
Speaker 2: gonna ruin everything. It's like, oh, I didn't realize that

706
00:34:42,280 --> 00:34:46,040
Speaker 2: was the requirement for maintaining a relationship with my daughters.

707
00:34:46,120 --> 00:34:47,880
Speaker 2: I have to buy her a car.

708
00:34:48,760 --> 00:34:52,840
Speaker 5: Not to mention, she already has a car that I

709
00:34:52,960 --> 00:34:57,000
Speaker 5: bought her two years ago, which works fine, So it's

710
00:34:57,000 --> 00:34:59,800
Speaker 5: not my I'm exactly depriving her, am I the a

711
00:35:00,239 --> 00:35:01,960
Speaker 5: What are you buying her a car like it's a

712
00:35:01,960 --> 00:35:03,760
Speaker 5: cell phone she dropped in the toilet.

713
00:35:03,960 --> 00:35:09,040
Speaker 3: You have caused your own problems. You have spoiled your daughter.

714
00:35:09,640 --> 00:35:11,959
Speaker 3: Why are you getting her a car two years later?

715
00:35:12,560 --> 00:35:15,760
Speaker 3: You have caused your own problems. Don't get her this car.

716
00:35:16,160 --> 00:35:18,560
Speaker 2: There is an edit here. I'm at work on my

717
00:35:18,640 --> 00:35:21,640
Speaker 2: lunch break right now, so I can't really reply. I've

718
00:35:21,680 --> 00:35:24,239
Speaker 2: skimmed the comments and will address a few things I

719
00:35:24,440 --> 00:35:27,160
Speaker 2: feel relevant. The car I bought her two years ago

720
00:35:27,239 --> 00:35:29,960
Speaker 2: was a run around Fiat five hundred second hand. It

721
00:35:30,040 --> 00:35:33,200
Speaker 2: is in fine shape, but not exactly the nicest car

722
00:35:33,719 --> 00:35:36,520
Speaker 2: I had promised my daughter in Audi as my son

723
00:35:36,719 --> 00:35:39,239
Speaker 2: is going traveling for his twenty first birthday, which I'm

724
00:35:39,280 --> 00:35:44,840
Speaker 2: paying for. The car she wanted was roughly the same cost.

725
00:35:45,560 --> 00:35:49,120
Speaker 2: Where is he? Where is where's your son? Traveling? Fiat

726
00:35:49,120 --> 00:35:53,240
Speaker 2: five hundred five hundreds A little just a little box.

727
00:35:53,680 --> 00:35:54,680
Speaker 3: Oh it's so cute.

728
00:35:55,480 --> 00:35:59,279
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know. That's a crazy amount. If your

729
00:35:59,400 --> 00:36:04,640
Speaker 2: trip cars an Audi? Where are you going? She doesn't

730
00:36:04,640 --> 00:36:07,400
Speaker 2: live at home. She hasn't since she moved out for

731
00:36:07,560 --> 00:36:10,480
Speaker 2: UNI at eighteen. I don't feel like I am a Karen,

732
00:36:10,560 --> 00:36:13,080
Speaker 2: but I'm not shy to speak up or complain if

733
00:36:13,120 --> 00:36:16,160
Speaker 2: I feel I must. If people are rude or something

734
00:36:16,200 --> 00:36:18,880
Speaker 2: is not up to my standard, I will happily say something.

735
00:36:19,760 --> 00:36:23,839
Speaker 2: I realistically couldn't beat the six' four whatever twenty something

736
00:36:23,920 --> 00:36:25,880
Speaker 2: year old mouthing off to me in a. FIGHT i

737
00:36:25,920 --> 00:36:28,200
Speaker 2: am forty seven years, old AND i have worked an

738
00:36:28,239 --> 00:36:30,160
Speaker 2: office job for the last twenty to thirty years and

739
00:36:30,200 --> 00:36:32,160
Speaker 2: have a bad. BACK i am a big.

740
00:36:32,239 --> 00:36:34,800
Speaker 3: Man i'm a big man with a bad.

741
00:36:34,920 --> 00:36:38,879
Speaker 2: Back now there's an. Update SO i got home about

742
00:36:38,880 --> 00:36:40,759
Speaker 2: an hour. Ago my wife called me into the room to.

743
00:36:40,800 --> 00:36:44,120
Speaker 2: Talk she gave me an. Ultimatum she, SAID i can

744
00:36:44,160 --> 00:36:46,759
Speaker 2: either swallow my pride and buy my daughter the, car

745
00:36:46,920 --> 00:36:48,839
Speaker 2: or she will buy the car out of her own.

746
00:36:48,880 --> 00:36:51,520
Speaker 2: MONEY i divorce my wife for.

747
00:36:51,560 --> 00:36:52,640
Speaker 4: That that's actually.

748
00:36:52,680 --> 00:36:55,560
Speaker 2: CRAZY i straight up would divorce my wife for.

749
00:36:55,600 --> 00:36:56,799
Speaker 4: This why does she need a?

750
00:36:56,920 --> 00:36:58,279
Speaker 6: Car she already has.

751
00:36:58,320 --> 00:36:59,160
Speaker 3: One she has a.

752
00:36:59,280 --> 00:37:03,600
Speaker 2: Car let's actually teach our daughter what it's like to

753
00:37:03,760 --> 00:37:05,279
Speaker 2: have to save up to buy a.

754
00:37:05,440 --> 00:37:07,240
Speaker 6: Thing you, also you earn.

755
00:37:07,400 --> 00:37:11,879
Speaker 1: Things you don't just get handed another brand new car

756
00:37:11,960 --> 00:37:14,279
Speaker 1: to you when you treated your dad like.

757
00:37:14,360 --> 00:37:15,719
Speaker 4: That, yeah, no it's it's.

758
00:37:15,760 --> 00:37:19,680
Speaker 2: Bonkers my wife doesn't earn as much as, me but

759
00:37:19,800 --> 00:37:22,000
Speaker 2: still has a well paying job and can afford. It

760
00:37:22,400 --> 00:37:24,920
Speaker 2: she said that everyone is sick of my attitude in,

761
00:37:24,920 --> 00:37:27,960
Speaker 2: public that every time we go OUT i get in

762
00:37:28,000 --> 00:37:31,000
Speaker 2: some sort of altercation or disagreement with someone over some petty.

763
00:37:31,080 --> 00:37:34,840
Speaker 2: NONSENSE i think this is a gross over, exaggeration but

764
00:37:34,880 --> 00:37:37,080
Speaker 2: my wife showed me texts from my daughter asking if

765
00:37:37,080 --> 00:37:39,680
Speaker 2: she can go out with just my wife BECAUSE i

766
00:37:39,800 --> 00:37:43,000
Speaker 2: always do something to embarrass. Everyone, BRO i knew. It

767
00:37:43,640 --> 00:37:47,520
Speaker 2: this doesn't make you like entirely, wrong but you do

768
00:37:48,000 --> 00:37:51,240
Speaker 2: that thing where instead of just going, eh you go.

769
00:37:51,480 --> 00:37:55,879
Speaker 3: Yeah you have to say something and that's STILL i mean,

770
00:37:55,960 --> 00:37:59,040
Speaker 3: like and that makes You karen your daughter's still. Spoiled

771
00:37:59,160 --> 00:37:59,480
Speaker 3: but it.

772
00:37:59,520 --> 00:38:02,640
Speaker 2: Does You're, karen and you spoiled your. Daughter you're A.

773
00:38:02,719 --> 00:38:03,520
Speaker 4: Karen he spoiled your.

774
00:38:03,600 --> 00:38:06,520
Speaker 2: Daughter it's not that he's, Blunt sarah, Says so he's,

775
00:38:06,560 --> 00:38:10,200
Speaker 2: BLUNT i don't think. So he's. Annoying, yeah he's annoyingly blud.

776
00:38:10,360 --> 00:38:14,520
Speaker 1: Nitpicky, yes he's got always something to say or Like

777
00:38:14,640 --> 00:38:17,759
Speaker 1: i've got like. That that was such a tiny. THING

778
00:38:17,840 --> 00:38:19,520
Speaker 1: i don't have to say anything about, it but you

779
00:38:19,640 --> 00:38:22,640
Speaker 1: know What i'm Gonna.

780
00:38:22,040 --> 00:38:25,120
Speaker 2: My wife refused this and defended, me saying that's not.

781
00:38:25,160 --> 00:38:27,760
Speaker 2: True and that's why WHEN i got into that, argument

782
00:38:27,840 --> 00:38:30,919
Speaker 2: my wife said nothing about my daughter's. Actions she said

783
00:38:30,920 --> 00:38:32,960
Speaker 2: she isn't going to punish my daughter BECAUSE i can

784
00:38:33,040 --> 00:38:36,120
Speaker 2: never keep my mouth, shut especially when my daughter said

785
00:38:36,160 --> 00:38:38,640
Speaker 2: she didn't want me there because something like this would.

786
00:38:38,719 --> 00:38:41,360
Speaker 2: Happen and she defended, me only to be made to

787
00:38:41,400 --> 00:38:44,520
Speaker 2: look like a. Fool she says that my daughter barely

788
00:38:44,600 --> 00:38:47,080
Speaker 2: likes me as it, is and IF i do, THIS

789
00:38:47,239 --> 00:38:50,080
Speaker 2: i shouldn't be shocked when she stops talking to me.

790
00:38:50,200 --> 00:38:53,160
Speaker 2: COMPLETELY i asked my wife if ALL i am to

791
00:38:53,160 --> 00:38:55,160
Speaker 2: my daughter is a piggy, bank and she told me

792
00:38:55,200 --> 00:38:58,880
Speaker 2: to stop playing the, victim so that's a. Yes she,

793
00:38:58,960 --> 00:39:01,000
Speaker 2: Said it's up to me WHAT i do with my,

794
00:39:01,080 --> 00:39:03,200
Speaker 2: money but my daughter will be getting the car one

795
00:39:03,239 --> 00:39:05,000
Speaker 2: way or, another SO i can either make her hate

796
00:39:05,040 --> 00:39:07,520
Speaker 2: me for no, reason OR i can swallow my pride

797
00:39:07,600 --> 00:39:10,279
Speaker 2: and get her the. Car myself don't really know where

798
00:39:10,320 --> 00:39:14,439
Speaker 2: to go from, HERE i, think, Honestly update, two where

799
00:39:14,440 --> 00:39:16,920
Speaker 2: you need to go from here is a divorce and

800
00:39:16,960 --> 00:39:19,000
Speaker 2: you get to live your life with your cool. SON

801
00:39:19,080 --> 00:39:22,839
Speaker 2: i Guess update. Two, SORRY i didn't really. RESPOND a

802
00:39:22,880 --> 00:39:26,719
Speaker 2: lot happened yesterday after. EVERYTHING i called my daughter over

803
00:39:26,800 --> 00:39:30,040
Speaker 2: BECAUSE i wanted to talk about. Everything my wife said

804
00:39:30,239 --> 00:39:32,480
Speaker 2: to just let it, go but clearly everyone had a

805
00:39:32,480 --> 00:39:34,719
Speaker 2: problem with me THAT i didn't know, about SO i

806
00:39:34,800 --> 00:39:36,680
Speaker 2: wanted to get to the bottom of. It SO i

807
00:39:36,719 --> 00:39:39,080
Speaker 2: waited for my son to get, home and my daughter

808
00:39:39,160 --> 00:39:41,880
Speaker 2: drove around a little. Later we all sat down and

809
00:39:41,920 --> 00:39:45,160
Speaker 2: decided to. TALK i started by doing what many of

810
00:39:45,200 --> 00:39:48,920
Speaker 2: you suggested and asked for actual examples rather than just

811
00:39:49,000 --> 00:39:52,160
Speaker 2: accepting their word for, It and, honestly a lot of

812
00:39:52,200 --> 00:39:55,480
Speaker 2: it sounded. Ridiculous the fact THAT i sent back a

813
00:39:55,480 --> 00:39:58,880
Speaker 2: stake twice because both times it was, undercooked as if

814
00:39:58,920 --> 00:40:01,360
Speaker 2: it's a crime to want an one hundred and eighty

815
00:40:01,520 --> 00:40:05,359
Speaker 2: pound steak cooked. Correctly that's the, currency not.

816
00:40:05,400 --> 00:40:07,000
Speaker 4: The weight for our podcast.

817
00:40:07,080 --> 00:40:09,280
Speaker 2: Leak you can't cook one hundred and eighty pound. Steak

818
00:40:09,680 --> 00:40:12,320
Speaker 2: that's too, big that's too. Much it's just too. Big

819
00:40:12,640 --> 00:40:14,799
Speaker 2: the fact THAT i argue with someone who sat in

820
00:40:14,840 --> 00:40:18,120
Speaker 2: our assigned seats at a cinema even though it was nearly, empty,

821
00:40:18,840 --> 00:40:20,600
Speaker 2: again as if it's a crime to want to sit

822
00:40:20,680 --> 00:40:22,480
Speaker 2: in the SEAT i paid, for when there's dozens of

823
00:40:22,480 --> 00:40:25,520
Speaker 2: other places for these people to, sit and other equally

824
00:40:25,560 --> 00:40:27,520
Speaker 2: silly things WHICH i can't be bothered to get into

825
00:40:27,600 --> 00:40:29,640
Speaker 2: and don't even really. Remember as a result of the

826
00:40:29,640 --> 00:40:30,759
Speaker 2: insignificance of, it it.

827
00:40:30,760 --> 00:40:31,840
Speaker 4: Doesn't feel like you're actually.

828
00:40:31,880 --> 00:40:35,839
Speaker 2: Listening, ope despite me thinking that it was all, RIDICULOUS

829
00:40:35,920 --> 00:40:37,680
Speaker 2: i SAID i would do my best to be a

830
00:40:37,800 --> 00:40:41,480
Speaker 2: meek pushover in. Public, ugh that was the only way

831
00:40:41,480 --> 00:40:43,239
Speaker 2: to get them to like. Me is that what you?

832
00:40:43,320 --> 00:40:45,560
Speaker 3: Said did you Say i'll be a meek pushover in?

833
00:40:45,640 --> 00:40:47,520
Speaker 3: Public you said THAT.

834
00:40:48,280 --> 00:40:51,600
Speaker 2: I SAID i would get the car on one condition

835
00:40:52,239 --> 00:40:56,120
Speaker 2: that my daughter hadn't actually texted the guy who mistreated.

836
00:40:56,160 --> 00:40:59,160
Speaker 2: ME i asked to look at her, messages and she

837
00:40:59,360 --> 00:41:01,960
Speaker 2: Said naz even bother because she had texted him AND

838
00:41:02,080 --> 00:41:04,000
Speaker 2: i didn't have the right to control who she talks.

839
00:41:04,040 --> 00:41:06,440
Speaker 2: TO i, said that's, true BUT i do have the

840
00:41:06,520 --> 00:41:08,480
Speaker 2: right to spend my money on WHATEVER i. Want And

841
00:41:08,600 --> 00:41:11,200
Speaker 2: i'm not getting my daughter a. Car she has one

842
00:41:11,200 --> 00:41:13,640
Speaker 2: that works. Fine and even IF i am a butt

843
00:41:13,680 --> 00:41:16,560
Speaker 2: in a situation where her family is getting, threatened she

844
00:41:16,680 --> 00:41:19,200
Speaker 2: sided with the aggressor and then doubled down on, that

845
00:41:19,719 --> 00:41:24,080
Speaker 2: and that is. Unforgivable my daughter blew up at me

846
00:41:24,800 --> 00:41:27,960
Speaker 2: and SAID i am a, quote a, petty little pig

847
00:41:28,000 --> 00:41:31,160
Speaker 2: headed man with A napoleon, complex and that all the

848
00:41:31,200 --> 00:41:33,720
Speaker 2: money in the world hasn't stopped me from being an effing.

849
00:41:33,840 --> 00:41:34,880
Speaker 2: Loser oo.

850
00:41:36,640 --> 00:41:38,399
Speaker 4: She burns, you she got.

851
00:41:38,480 --> 00:41:42,759
Speaker 2: YOU i, said oh, yeah because the guy who screams

852
00:41:42,800 --> 00:41:46,120
Speaker 2: at old man is such a. Winner this guy's forty, seven,

853
00:41:46,640 --> 00:41:49,759
Speaker 2: gol what this guy's forty? Seven? What she screamed at,

854
00:41:49,760 --> 00:41:52,239
Speaker 2: me That i'm not a, victim and then something about

855
00:41:52,280 --> 00:41:54,880
Speaker 2: how cathartic it was to watch someone stand up to,

856
00:41:54,920 --> 00:41:57,320
Speaker 2: me and that how the second he, did she watched

857
00:41:57,320 --> 00:42:00,640
Speaker 2: me shrink back into the, little tiny one Man i'd

858
00:42:00,680 --> 00:42:04,759
Speaker 2: always been growing. Up that was the last STRAW i

859
00:42:04,880 --> 00:42:08,360
Speaker 2: told her to get, out but she doubled down and

860
00:42:08,400 --> 00:42:10,360
Speaker 2: told me that my wife had told them about me

861
00:42:10,480 --> 00:42:13,719
Speaker 2: being bullied growing, up and that that was WHY i

862
00:42:13,760 --> 00:42:16,919
Speaker 2: am the WAY i. AM i saw my wife turn

863
00:42:17,040 --> 00:42:19,920
Speaker 2: pale as a ghost at this. Comment this is SOMETHING

864
00:42:19,920 --> 00:42:23,239
Speaker 2: i confided in her in. Private, clearly this is why

865
00:42:23,280 --> 00:42:27,640
Speaker 2: my daughter stopped respecting. Me OBVIOUSLY i wasn't cool enough

866
00:42:27,640 --> 00:42:29,440
Speaker 2: for her or whatever or.

867
00:42:29,480 --> 00:42:33,600
Speaker 6: Whatever oh, boy.

868
00:42:34,520 --> 00:42:38,040
Speaker 2: Everything everything with this. Guy he says me, me, me, me, me, me,

869
00:42:38,040 --> 00:42:41,200
Speaker 2: me me me. Me that's every little thing he says is.

870
00:42:41,320 --> 00:42:43,360
Speaker 3: Me, me, me, me me me. Me OBVIOUSLY i wasn't

871
00:42:43,440 --> 00:42:48,600
Speaker 3: cool enough for or. Whatever, yeah everyone sucks. Here someone

872
00:42:48,680 --> 00:42:52,840
Speaker 3: give me a. Stamp, no except for the. Sun someone

873
00:42:52,880 --> 00:42:55,680
Speaker 3: give me another, stamp except for the.

874
00:42:55,719 --> 00:42:56,279
Speaker 4: Sun there we.

875
00:42:56,360 --> 00:43:00,680
Speaker 2: GO i was, speechless but my daughter carried. On she,

876
00:43:00,760 --> 00:43:04,160
Speaker 2: said make a genuine promise To. Jake he can still

877
00:43:04,200 --> 00:43:07,400
Speaker 2: go To cambodia and ask him what he really. THINKS

878
00:43:07,760 --> 00:43:11,359
Speaker 2: i just. Nodded her brother begged not to be put

879
00:43:11,360 --> 00:43:13,560
Speaker 2: in the middle of, this BUT i. Insisted all he

880
00:43:13,600 --> 00:43:16,960
Speaker 2: said was sometimes you can be a bit, Much. Dad that's.

881
00:43:17,000 --> 00:43:19,759
Speaker 6: It cambodia, gone it's.

882
00:43:19,760 --> 00:43:24,480
Speaker 2: Off my daughter called him a poushech and just walked.

883
00:43:24,520 --> 00:43:27,279
Speaker 2: Out my son ran off to his, room and my

884
00:43:27,360 --> 00:43:30,760
Speaker 2: wife drove off after my. Daughter she didn't come back last.

885
00:43:30,800 --> 00:43:34,320
Speaker 2: Night i've not heard from my wife or daughter Since

886
00:43:35,000 --> 00:43:37,840
Speaker 2: i've called out of. Work my son left for university

887
00:43:37,880 --> 00:43:40,759
Speaker 2: without saying a word to. Me i've barely slept a.

888
00:43:40,800 --> 00:43:43,680
Speaker 2: WINK i can't believe. It i'm a, cliche a rich

889
00:43:43,760 --> 00:43:46,480
Speaker 2: old man whose family hates. Him IF i was lost,

890
00:43:46,520 --> 00:43:49,759
Speaker 2: before Now i'm genuinely clueless about What i'm supposed to.

891
00:43:49,760 --> 00:43:52,080
Speaker 2: Do and that is the end of that. Story let

892
00:43:52,080 --> 00:43:54,239
Speaker 2: me tell you one thing right. Now divorce your.

893
00:43:54,280 --> 00:43:56,520
Speaker 3: Wife i'm gonna be, honest THOUGH i think your wife

894
00:43:56,600 --> 00:43:58,440
Speaker 3: needs to divorce you.

895
00:43:58,800 --> 00:44:01,560
Speaker 1: Simultaneously my favorite thing is when you look up the

896
00:44:01,600 --> 00:44:03,600
Speaker 1: account and, go, mmm what's going on with the?

897
00:44:03,640 --> 00:44:05,960
Speaker 6: Account deleted or and?

898
00:44:06,080 --> 00:44:09,920
Speaker 3: Ban, yeah, yeah that guy. Was that guy was definitely

899
00:44:10,000 --> 00:44:10,719
Speaker 3: named THE a.

900
00:44:10,920 --> 00:44:14,040
Speaker 2: Hole and that's the end of this. Story let's head

901
00:44:14,040 --> 00:44:14,479
Speaker 2: to the next.

902
00:44:14,480 --> 00:44:18,120
Speaker 7: One my fiance refuse to give our baby my, name

903
00:44:18,480 --> 00:44:19,520
Speaker 7: AND i won't let it.

904
00:44:19,600 --> 00:44:20,919
Speaker 3: Happen what if your name?

905
00:44:21,120 --> 00:44:24,920
Speaker 7: SUCKS I male forty have been with my Partner jessica

906
00:44:25,080 --> 00:44:27,160
Speaker 7: female thirty six for the last three.

907
00:44:27,320 --> 00:44:29,840
Speaker 4: Years we have been engaged.

908
00:44:29,360 --> 00:44:32,200
Speaker 3: For about a. Year we are expecting our first baby

909
00:44:32,280 --> 00:44:32,759
Speaker 3: together In.

910
00:44:32,800 --> 00:44:33,440
Speaker 4: September.

911
00:44:34,400 --> 00:44:38,239
Speaker 7: Congrats jessica has two, kids fifteen and thirteen year old,

912
00:44:38,280 --> 00:44:41,400
Speaker 7: girls from her first. Marriage the kid's dad was a

913
00:44:41,480 --> 00:44:45,400
Speaker 7: high school boyfriend who is an irresponsible man and has

914
00:44:45,440 --> 00:44:47,839
Speaker 7: always broke and lives with his parents because he can't

915
00:44:47,840 --> 00:44:48,080
Speaker 7: hold a.

916
00:44:48,160 --> 00:44:49,960
Speaker 2: Job ooh.

917
00:44:50,280 --> 00:44:52,640
Speaker 3: Tough kids live with, us but occasionally meet their.

918
00:44:52,719 --> 00:44:55,760
Speaker 7: Dad by the, way this comes From Cute culture sixty

919
00:44:55,800 --> 00:44:57,719
Speaker 7: one seventy. Six and if you want to sumit your own,

920
00:44:57,719 --> 00:45:00,560
Speaker 7: stories get to the r Slash, okay story, time Subred I'm,

921
00:45:00,640 --> 00:45:02,319
Speaker 7: Savannah I'm, Sophia i'm Ke.

922
00:45:02,520 --> 00:45:04,760
Speaker 3: On but we're here to give some good advice goofy

923
00:45:04,800 --> 00:45:05,400
Speaker 3: in a little.

924
00:45:05,160 --> 00:45:08,000
Speaker 7: Goofy, manner you, Know and and we're gonna tell you

925
00:45:08,000 --> 00:45:08,399
Speaker 7: what we would.

926
00:45:08,440 --> 00:45:09,960
Speaker 4: Do AND i want you to tell us what you

927
00:45:09,960 --> 00:45:10,480
Speaker 4: would do in the.

928
00:45:10,520 --> 00:45:13,360
Speaker 1: Comments, YEAH i let us know what happens in the

929
00:45:13,440 --> 00:45:16,080
Speaker 1: room when it, Happens, Okay.

930
00:45:16,200 --> 00:45:20,000
Speaker 7: Hamilton jessica has her first husband's last name and never

931
00:45:20,120 --> 00:45:22,880
Speaker 7: changed it after her. Divorce last, night we were discussing,

932
00:45:22,960 --> 00:45:26,080
Speaker 7: names then out of, nowhere she, said, no that name

933
00:45:26,080 --> 00:45:30,319
Speaker 7: will sound. Ridiculous with her slash her first husband's last.

934
00:45:30,400 --> 00:45:35,920
Speaker 3: Name, wait that's. Weird what she wants your, child your collective,

935
00:45:36,000 --> 00:45:40,319
Speaker 3: child to have her husband's last her ex husband's last. Name,

936
00:45:40,480 --> 00:45:44,719
Speaker 3: yeah that's that's a whole difference to. Her, no, no,

937
00:45:44,719 --> 00:45:48,200
Speaker 3: NO i don't, Understand like this child has nothing to

938
00:45:48,280 --> 00:45:53,160
Speaker 3: do with yes exactly though it's twice removed from that.

939
00:45:53,239 --> 00:45:54,560
Speaker 4: Name twice.

940
00:45:54,600 --> 00:45:56,840
Speaker 3: Removed what's going on? Here i'm a.

941
00:45:56,880 --> 00:45:59,719
Speaker 7: SURPRISED i, asked why on earth our baby would have

942
00:45:59,800 --> 00:46:03,080
Speaker 7: your her first husband's last. Name jessica, said because she

943
00:46:03,200 --> 00:46:05,560
Speaker 7: wants all the kids to have the same last, Name

944
00:46:05,840 --> 00:46:06,440
Speaker 7: so why not.

945
00:46:08,280 --> 00:46:11,440
Speaker 3: If they're also this dad isn't even. Around, yeah like

946
00:46:11,480 --> 00:46:14,480
Speaker 3: it's not even like the dad is around to be

947
00:46:14,640 --> 00:46:15,799
Speaker 3: upset about his name.

948
00:46:15,920 --> 00:46:17,680
Speaker 4: Not you, know this is so.

949
00:46:17,719 --> 00:46:21,880
Speaker 3: STRANGE i WOULD i would, Say, NO i understand, then

950
00:46:22,000 --> 00:46:24,640
Speaker 3: like they she wants them all to have the same last.

951
00:46:24,719 --> 00:46:28,600
Speaker 7: NAME i would also want, That but he's not involved

952
00:46:28,640 --> 00:46:33,200
Speaker 7: at all with this, child so they that's like just being, like,

953
00:46:33,400 --> 00:46:36,680
Speaker 7: UH i want to be you Know smith, Now Samantha.

954
00:46:36,719 --> 00:46:37,600
Speaker 4: Smith that's WHAT i.

955
00:46:37,600 --> 00:46:39,160
Speaker 1: Want she's probably, LIKE i don't, know just has a

956
00:46:39,200 --> 00:46:42,360
Speaker 1: better ring to. It, yeah Like Bobby Bobby. Smith it

957
00:46:42,440 --> 00:46:43,200
Speaker 1: just sounds really.

958
00:46:43,239 --> 00:46:43,520
Speaker 6: Good.

959
00:46:43,680 --> 00:46:46,359
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah LIKE I i'm really confused by this is

960
00:46:46,440 --> 00:46:47,600
Speaker 4: your last. Name this is.

961
00:46:47,600 --> 00:46:50,400
Speaker 7: Weird it's really confusing for the older kids to change,

962
00:46:50,440 --> 00:46:52,399
Speaker 7: theirs so it makes sense if the new baby has

963
00:46:52,440 --> 00:46:55,640
Speaker 7: the same last. NAME i told, her, No i'm not.

964
00:46:55,680 --> 00:46:58,880
Speaker 7: Comfortable she got angry and called me old fashioned man

965
00:46:58,960 --> 00:47:02,759
Speaker 7: with outdated. Value this is not outdated. Values this is just.

966
00:47:02,880 --> 00:47:05,520
Speaker 7: WEIRD i told, her if she had chosen her maiden

967
00:47:05,640 --> 00:47:07,600
Speaker 7: name for the, BABY i was completely okay with, that

968
00:47:07,840 --> 00:47:10,000
Speaker 7: BUT i don't want our baby to have her ex's last.

969
00:47:10,040 --> 00:47:14,959
Speaker 7: Name legitimate, Concern, yes she, Said i'm. Insecure, wrong it's

970
00:47:15,040 --> 00:47:17,920
Speaker 7: her in her kids' last, name And i'm being a

971
00:47:18,000 --> 00:47:18,440
Speaker 7: giant a?

972
00:47:18,560 --> 00:47:21,160
Speaker 3: Hole AM i being? Oversensitive?

973
00:47:21,600 --> 00:47:24,640
Speaker 4: No this is really. Weird, yeah it's her in her

974
00:47:24,719 --> 00:47:25,359
Speaker 4: kids's last.

975
00:47:25,440 --> 00:47:25,839
Speaker 2: Name i'm.

976
00:47:25,880 --> 00:47:29,040
Speaker 6: Sorry who? Else who else is involved in that? One?

977
00:47:29,280 --> 00:47:32,640
Speaker 3: YEAH i Would, YEAH i would.

978
00:47:32,640 --> 00:47:34,000
Speaker 4: BE i would be really upset about.

979
00:47:34,040 --> 00:47:36,120
Speaker 3: THIS i don't know how you maybe maybe we can

980
00:47:36,120 --> 00:47:38,600
Speaker 3: get some sort of mediator in, here because if she's

981
00:47:38,600 --> 00:47:41,200
Speaker 3: not gonna back, down and you know you're not comfortable with,

982
00:47:41,239 --> 00:47:43,680
Speaker 3: it and she's not, listening, yeah not a good.

983
00:47:43,719 --> 00:47:47,480
Speaker 7: Sign, yeah there are some comments Consistent day four to four,

984
00:47:47,640 --> 00:47:50,160
Speaker 7: says hyphenate the names for the baby that's.

985
00:47:50,200 --> 00:47:51,319
Speaker 2: Me, YEAH i guess you could do.

986
00:47:51,360 --> 00:47:52,439
Speaker 6: THAT i have guess last.

987
00:47:52,520 --> 00:47:54,840
Speaker 3: Names, YEAH i guess that would be the.

988
00:47:54,840 --> 00:47:58,560
Speaker 7: Compromise so then if you, marry mother can hyphenate her name.

989
00:47:58,600 --> 00:48:01,799
Speaker 7: Too that, way she still carries the same.

990
00:48:01,600 --> 00:48:02,680
Speaker 3: Name as her older.

991
00:48:02,800 --> 00:48:06,440
Speaker 7: Children opie, responds hyphenated with her maiden, name not a,

992
00:48:06,480 --> 00:48:11,000
Speaker 7: problem absolutely her last name, Only i'm all for. It

993
00:48:11,320 --> 00:48:15,080
Speaker 7: hyphenated with her ex husband's last. Name, NO i don't

994
00:48:15,080 --> 00:48:18,680
Speaker 7: feel comfortable insert name. Here in nine sixteen says this

995
00:48:18,880 --> 00:48:22,880
Speaker 7: is butt. Backwards why wouldn't the option be her older

996
00:48:22,960 --> 00:48:25,399
Speaker 7: children and herself change their names to the man who

997
00:48:25,440 --> 00:48:28,479
Speaker 7: is actually, supporting, loving and sharing his life with. Them great,

998
00:48:28,560 --> 00:48:31,759
Speaker 7: question versus giving them name of a man who has

999
00:48:31,840 --> 00:48:32,759
Speaker 7: little interest in their.

1000
00:48:32,800 --> 00:48:36,360
Speaker 3: Lives another child his last name that isn't even.

1001
00:48:36,320 --> 00:48:37,600
Speaker 6: His even better.

1002
00:48:37,719 --> 00:48:39,720
Speaker 2: Question, yeah the fact.

1003
00:48:39,560 --> 00:48:41,080
Speaker 3: That it's not even. His he has nothing to do

1004
00:48:41,120 --> 00:48:41,239
Speaker 3: with the.

1005
00:48:41,360 --> 00:48:42,879
Speaker 4: Child and she's, LIKE i want his last?

1006
00:48:43,000 --> 00:48:43,239
Speaker 3: Name?

1007
00:48:43,719 --> 00:48:45,799
Speaker 4: Huh, yeah where did that come? From?

1008
00:48:45,880 --> 00:48:46,040
Speaker 3: Why?

1009
00:48:46,120 --> 00:48:48,320
Speaker 1: YEAH i was, like why don't you use at least

1010
00:48:48,640 --> 00:48:50,200
Speaker 1: your previous last?

1011
00:48:50,280 --> 00:48:54,080
Speaker 7: Name, yeah it just would make more. Sense i'm shocked

1012
00:48:54,080 --> 00:48:58,120
Speaker 7: you're not more pissed. Off it's widely inappropriate and. Disrespectful

1013
00:48:58,520 --> 00:49:00,680
Speaker 7: ask her how she would feel if you post naming

1014
00:49:00,719 --> 00:49:03,759
Speaker 7: the child after your Ex i'm assuming you intent on

1015
00:49:03,840 --> 00:49:07,279
Speaker 7: signing the birth. Certificate her expectation is you sign it

1016
00:49:07,320 --> 00:49:10,719
Speaker 7: with the man's. Name OH p, Response she is carrying the.

1017
00:49:10,760 --> 00:49:13,560
Speaker 7: BABY i want to be. SUPPORTIVE i understand your. Point

1018
00:49:13,640 --> 00:49:16,600
Speaker 7: i'm supporting the. Kids they are my. Daughters i'm their,

1019
00:49:16,680 --> 00:49:19,080
Speaker 7: dad but it's not my place to decide to change

1020
00:49:19,120 --> 00:49:21,600
Speaker 7: their names when their biological dad is in the. Picture,

1021
00:49:22,320 --> 00:49:26,520
Speaker 7: Occasionally old Cats only, says why wasn't this discussed before

1022
00:49:26,600 --> 00:49:29,600
Speaker 7: you got? Pregnant ohpi, responds we never discussed the last.

1023
00:49:29,680 --> 00:49:31,799
Speaker 7: Name she did tell me that she won't change her

1024
00:49:31,880 --> 00:49:33,919
Speaker 7: last name when we get married because of the older,

1025
00:49:34,000 --> 00:49:36,200
Speaker 7: kids and she doesn't like My arabic last.

1026
00:49:36,280 --> 00:49:38,359
Speaker 6: Name oh, well there it.

1027
00:49:38,440 --> 00:49:40,880
Speaker 4: Is there it frick it.

1028
00:49:41,080 --> 00:49:43,879
Speaker 3: Is I'm Middle. EASTERN i accepted her.

1029
00:49:43,920 --> 00:49:45,839
Speaker 2: Decision there it.

1030
00:49:45,920 --> 00:49:51,160
Speaker 1: Is she, SAID i want the Traditional american last.

1031
00:49:51,200 --> 00:49:54,280
Speaker 6: Name, YEAH i Want, SMITH i Want.

1032
00:49:54,400 --> 00:49:59,840
Speaker 3: Anderson, now, YEAH i would BE i don't know. It

1033
00:50:00,000 --> 00:50:02,640
Speaker 3: it's tough because this would make.

1034
00:50:02,520 --> 00:50:05,600
Speaker 4: Me rethink a lot of future. Decisions but you.

1035
00:50:05,520 --> 00:50:09,080
Speaker 3: Guys are literally like about to have a. Child so

1036
00:50:09,520 --> 00:50:12,439
Speaker 3: it's kind of the worst timing in the. WORLD i don't,

1037
00:50:12,480 --> 00:50:15,200
Speaker 3: know don't love this, Though.

1038
00:50:14,960 --> 00:50:17,600
Speaker 7: NO i will bring you, water SAYS i think there's

1039
00:50:17,640 --> 00:50:21,040
Speaker 7: an argument to having her last name for the, kids

1040
00:50:21,480 --> 00:50:23,560
Speaker 7: but you are right in saying no to your kid

1041
00:50:23,680 --> 00:50:28,520
Speaker 7: having an irresponsible man stranger's. NAME i would stand your,

1042
00:50:28,560 --> 00:50:31,440
Speaker 7: Ground opie. Responds she, says it's hers and the older

1043
00:50:31,520 --> 00:50:35,280
Speaker 7: kid's last, name And i'm overthinking NEGATIVE b seven seven.

1044
00:50:35,120 --> 00:50:37,080
Speaker 4: Four to one is. Downvoted uh.

1045
00:50:37,120 --> 00:50:39,799
Speaker 7: Oh her current last name is the kid's last, name

1046
00:50:39,840 --> 00:50:42,320
Speaker 7: and she wants the same last name as all our. Kids,

1047
00:50:42,440 --> 00:50:45,640
Speaker 7: Understandably SO i mean, NO i completely understand that as. Well,

1048
00:50:45,719 --> 00:50:48,719
Speaker 7: yeah just that this this baby has no association with that,

1049
00:50:49,520 --> 00:50:52,520
Speaker 7: man so it just doesn't make sense.

1050
00:50:52,360 --> 00:50:55,279
Speaker 4: That It's and, also op he does not want. That,

1051
00:50:55,760 --> 00:50:58,520
Speaker 4: Yeah so one person out of the two is saying.

1052
00:50:58,640 --> 00:51:02,239
Speaker 3: No opie, responds this is her.

1053
00:51:02,400 --> 00:51:05,799
Speaker 7: Argument i'm not asking to change her last, name BUT

1054
00:51:05,840 --> 00:51:08,160
Speaker 7: i don't want her ex's last name on our baby.

1055
00:51:08,239 --> 00:51:09,319
Speaker 3: EITHER i Mean i'd be.

1056
00:51:09,400 --> 00:51:14,080
Speaker 6: Pissed yeah if it was her maiden. Name, yeah, again perfectly.

1057
00:51:14,160 --> 00:51:15,960
Speaker 6: Understandable but it's.

1058
00:51:16,320 --> 00:51:19,800
Speaker 1: Your ex's last. Name why who's not in your who's

1059
00:51:19,840 --> 00:51:23,359
Speaker 1: not in your life barely. Barely, yeah there's an.

1060
00:51:23,400 --> 00:51:27,200
Speaker 7: UPDATES i wrote earlier today about my disagreement with my pregnant.

1061
00:51:27,200 --> 00:51:31,040
Speaker 7: Fiance she was married, before and she and her two

1062
00:51:31,120 --> 00:51:33,880
Speaker 7: kids have the same last. Name she wants our baby

1063
00:51:33,920 --> 00:51:36,239
Speaker 7: to have her ex husband's last name, because according to,

1064
00:51:36,320 --> 00:51:39,160
Speaker 7: her it's her name now and she wants all the

1065
00:51:39,200 --> 00:51:41,759
Speaker 7: kids to share the same last. NAME i told HER

1066
00:51:41,800 --> 00:51:44,480
Speaker 7: i would have zero problem if it were her maiden,

1067
00:51:44,560 --> 00:51:47,520
Speaker 7: name BUT i don't feel comfortable introducing our baby with

1068
00:51:47,560 --> 00:51:51,400
Speaker 7: her ex husband's last. Name she got, mad SO i posted.

1069
00:51:51,440 --> 00:51:54,440
Speaker 7: Here some people suggested THAT i should change my last name,

1070
00:51:54,480 --> 00:51:55,560
Speaker 7: too which is a big.

1071
00:51:55,719 --> 00:51:59,680
Speaker 1: No who the heck is suggesting, That, oh, yeah everyone.

1072
00:51:59,360 --> 00:52:01,360
Speaker 3: Changes your their, name that's the.

1073
00:52:01,400 --> 00:52:05,160
Speaker 7: Solution the solution is everyone becomes mister and Missus, johnson

1074
00:52:05,360 --> 00:52:10,239
Speaker 7: all or nothing. Everyone, Yeah I'm Middle eastern and my

1075
00:52:10,320 --> 00:52:13,200
Speaker 7: last name is part of my. Heritage someone suggested that

1076
00:52:13,239 --> 00:52:15,719
Speaker 7: maybe my fiance doesn't want the baby to be associated

1077
00:52:15,760 --> 00:52:15,960
Speaker 7: with my.

1078
00:52:16,040 --> 00:52:17,520
Speaker 6: Culture oh bells are?

1079
00:52:17,600 --> 00:52:22,200
Speaker 7: Ringing, Yeah oh that made me, think SO i asked.

1080
00:52:22,200 --> 00:52:25,200
Speaker 7: Her to my, surprise she said she wants to protect

1081
00:52:25,239 --> 00:52:28,480
Speaker 7: the baby by giving them a normal last. Name so

1082
00:52:28,640 --> 00:52:33,279
Speaker 7: the answer, is, yes it, was but what's. That oh,

1083
00:52:33,360 --> 00:52:33,799
Speaker 7: yeah she's.

1084
00:52:34,280 --> 00:52:37,680
Speaker 4: YEA i hate. THAT i hate.

1085
00:52:37,680 --> 00:52:40,239
Speaker 3: THAT i hate the idea of oh WELL i need you,

1086
00:52:40,280 --> 00:52:43,759
Speaker 3: know my child will just have an easier, Time So

1087
00:52:43,800 --> 00:52:45,840
Speaker 3: i'm just gonna wipe their heritage, away.

1088
00:52:45,840 --> 00:52:48,759
Speaker 1: Which is insane because you're, like, okay let's do some

1089
00:52:48,880 --> 00:52:53,840
Speaker 1: simple math here with genetics AND. Dna i'm still the. Father,

1090
00:52:54,280 --> 00:52:58,239
Speaker 1: yeah you do realize that kid is going to, be you,

1091
00:52:58,360 --> 00:52:59,719
Speaker 1: know have some of my.

1092
00:53:00,280 --> 00:53:03,960
Speaker 6: Heage they're going to look, like, YEAH i.

1093
00:53:03,960 --> 00:53:05,920
Speaker 7: Explained that our baby is going to be mixed up

1094
00:53:06,000 --> 00:53:08,359
Speaker 7: and that there's nothing to be embarrassed. About our child

1095
00:53:08,440 --> 00:53:11,480
Speaker 7: should be proud of their father's. Heritage she rolled her

1096
00:53:11,640 --> 00:53:15,480
Speaker 7: eyes and, said you don't need An arabic last name

1097
00:53:15,520 --> 00:53:18,920
Speaker 7: to be. Proud no need to shove your culture in everyone's.

1098
00:53:18,960 --> 00:53:22,080
Speaker 7: Face you can teach about your culture when the baby

1099
00:53:22,160 --> 00:53:24,400
Speaker 7: is old enough to understand.

1100
00:53:24,200 --> 00:53:26,000
Speaker 3: Immediately i'm no longer marrying this.

1101
00:53:26,040 --> 00:53:27,720
Speaker 4: Person, yeah that's when it's.

1102
00:53:27,640 --> 00:53:31,160
Speaker 3: Like ooh oh, ouch oh.

1103
00:53:30,160 --> 00:53:34,719
Speaker 1: Yeah i'm gonna go that's crazy because how is this

1104
00:53:34,840 --> 00:53:39,279
Speaker 1: coming up? Now LIKE i feel, like since you Are,

1105
00:53:39,400 --> 00:53:43,520
Speaker 1: arabic you would have been showing her your, culture talking

1106
00:53:43,560 --> 00:53:46,520
Speaker 1: about it food, wise all of that jazz in.

1107
00:53:46,560 --> 00:53:47,880
Speaker 6: BETWEEN i think.

1108
00:53:47,680 --> 00:53:52,759
Speaker 3: People are willing to let things, slide except when it

1109
00:53:53,000 --> 00:53:55,480
Speaker 3: LIKE i think a lot of times children do kind

1110
00:53:55,480 --> 00:53:58,560
Speaker 3: of reveals how people actually, want you, know want to

1111
00:53:58,640 --> 00:53:59,960
Speaker 3: raise people raise.

1112
00:54:00,000 --> 00:54:03,880
Speaker 6: Because people raise you up on eagles.

1113
00:54:03,920 --> 00:54:10,000
Speaker 7: Wings oh, SEE i thought you raised me up. ANYWAY

1114
00:54:10,600 --> 00:54:13,080
Speaker 7: i was taken, ABACK i told, HER i have never

1115
00:54:13,120 --> 00:54:16,400
Speaker 7: experienced this SINCE i moved To. Canada if, anything people

1116
00:54:16,400 --> 00:54:19,640
Speaker 7: have always been. RESPECTFUL i can't Believe i've experienced this

1117
00:54:19,760 --> 00:54:24,520
Speaker 7: from my own, Fiance she, Said i'm. Oblivious she insists

1118
00:54:24,520 --> 00:54:28,239
Speaker 7: she's not discriminatory or embarrassed by my, culture but that

1119
00:54:28,360 --> 00:54:31,279
Speaker 7: people around her have given her looks and apparently made

1120
00:54:31,400 --> 00:54:33,799
Speaker 7: comments about me not being white.

1121
00:54:33,800 --> 00:54:35,759
Speaker 6: Who which People.

1122
00:54:35,600 --> 00:54:40,200
Speaker 3: She's not's not, discriminatory but when people tell her, things she,

1123
00:54:40,480 --> 00:54:42,279
Speaker 3: like she just acquiesces to what they.

1124
00:54:42,360 --> 00:54:44,680
Speaker 6: Say she don't like. It, yeah she's.

1125
00:54:44,520 --> 00:54:47,120
Speaker 3: Pure pressured into being. Discrimatory just breaking.

1126
00:54:47,160 --> 00:54:50,799
Speaker 4: Up, YEAH i would not be. MARRIED i would not

1127
00:54:50,800 --> 00:54:51,680
Speaker 4: be raising my child with.

1128
00:54:51,760 --> 00:54:51,840
Speaker 6: Her.

1129
00:54:51,960 --> 00:54:55,040
Speaker 7: Yea she says she doesn't want our child to experience,

1130
00:54:55,080 --> 00:54:56,480
Speaker 7: that and That i'm being.

1131
00:54:56,600 --> 00:54:59,480
Speaker 1: Unreasonable does she does she really expect the child not

1132
00:54:59,560 --> 00:55:02,040
Speaker 1: to come ou, Like i'm not SAYING i don't know

1133
00:55:02,040 --> 00:55:03,840
Speaker 1: your skin tone, color but she comes out as.

1134
00:55:03,920 --> 00:55:05,920
Speaker 6: Chrome she just.

1135
00:55:05,960 --> 00:55:08,160
Speaker 2: Shining i'm, chrome my daughter's.

1136
00:55:08,320 --> 00:55:10,399
Speaker 4: Chrome, yeah try to make.

1137
00:55:10,480 --> 00:55:14,360
Speaker 3: That, no it's it's just like a very like discriminatory

1138
00:55:14,360 --> 00:55:16,360
Speaker 3: way of thinking, of or prejudiced.

1139
00:55:15,960 --> 00:55:18,920
Speaker 4: Way of thinking of, Saying, oh, well my mixed.

1140
00:55:19,040 --> 00:55:22,560
Speaker 3: Child you, know IF i don't like IF i name

1141
00:55:22,640 --> 00:55:25,760
Speaker 3: them an anglicized, name then AND i erase their, culture

1142
00:55:25,920 --> 00:55:27,759
Speaker 3: then they're basically, white which is.

1143
00:55:28,560 --> 00:55:30,239
Speaker 6: Does she not know how genetics? Were?

1144
00:55:30,560 --> 00:55:34,000
Speaker 7: NO i feel, selfish BUT i don't want my child

1145
00:55:34,000 --> 00:55:36,440
Speaker 7: to pretend to be someone there. NOT i now feel

1146
00:55:36,440 --> 00:55:39,480
Speaker 7: Like i'm ruining my kid's. LIFE i can't stop thinking about. This,

1147
00:55:39,840 --> 00:55:43,239
Speaker 7: yeah there are some comments to a long down voted.

1148
00:55:43,040 --> 00:55:45,879
Speaker 6: Common let's hear. IT i love. This let's. See i'm.

1149
00:55:45,920 --> 00:55:49,040
Speaker 7: ATHEIST i don't believe in. Anything my parents are the

1150
00:55:49,080 --> 00:55:51,560
Speaker 7: non Practicing. Muslim my parents are.

1151
00:55:51,400 --> 00:55:54,000
Speaker 3: Fine with me being an atheist and my sister being

1152
00:55:54,120 --> 00:55:54,640
Speaker 3: openly A.

1153
00:55:54,680 --> 00:55:56,640
Speaker 4: Sapphic, lol your parents are.

1154
00:55:56,800 --> 00:56:00,160
Speaker 7: SICK i would never impose my religion on. HER i

1155
00:56:00,160 --> 00:56:03,040
Speaker 7: would never expect her to. CONVERT i did expect her

1156
00:56:03,040 --> 00:56:05,480
Speaker 7: to allow me to teach the baby about my country and.

1157
00:56:05,520 --> 00:56:09,480
Speaker 7: Culture this comment comes From Babraham.

1158
00:56:08,960 --> 00:56:12,200
Speaker 3: Lincoln for sixteen and that is the best Name i've ever.

1159
00:56:12,239 --> 00:56:16,919
Speaker 7: Heard instead of addressing your discriminatory, Fiance i'll just jump

1160
00:56:16,960 --> 00:56:20,520
Speaker 7: to solution. Mode hyphenated last. Name this gives them a,

1161
00:56:20,560 --> 00:56:24,200
Speaker 7: white normal name to use if they choose to in,

1162
00:56:24,400 --> 00:56:26,799
Speaker 7: adulthood and respects your familial ties as.

1163
00:56:26,840 --> 00:56:29,760
Speaker 4: WELL i don't even like. That, YEAH i don't even.

1164
00:56:29,760 --> 00:56:32,920
Speaker 3: Like the THE i mean, one we already Know opie's problem with,

1165
00:56:32,920 --> 00:56:35,799
Speaker 3: that BUT i don't even like saying coming at it

1166
00:56:35,880 --> 00:56:38,120
Speaker 3: from that angle of, like, well if they want to

1167
00:56:38,160 --> 00:56:41,160
Speaker 3: choose the normal names AND i know, that, yeah but,

1168
00:56:41,280 --> 00:56:44,000
Speaker 3: LIKE i don't even like. THAT opi responds with her

1169
00:56:44,080 --> 00:56:45,120
Speaker 3: maiden not a.

1170
00:56:45,200 --> 00:56:47,960
Speaker 7: PROBLEM i don't want her ex lover's last name to

1171
00:56:47,960 --> 00:56:49,359
Speaker 7: be part of our baby's last.

1172
00:56:49,440 --> 00:56:50,279
Speaker 3: Name, oh and that's.

1173
00:56:50,320 --> 00:56:55,120
Speaker 7: IT i, MEAN i agree With OP'T i don't think

1174
00:56:55,160 --> 00:56:59,440
Speaker 7: that it should be the ex husband's last name because

1175
00:56:59,440 --> 00:57:02,040
Speaker 7: he's not in this child at. ALL i know she

1176
00:57:02,160 --> 00:57:04,040
Speaker 7: wants all all of them Now i'm the same last,

1177
00:57:04,080 --> 00:57:05,160
Speaker 7: name but it's.

1178
00:57:05,080 --> 00:57:06,319
Speaker 4: JUST i don't.

1179
00:57:06,360 --> 00:57:10,879
Speaker 1: Know, Yeah i'm having so many doubts in this. RELATIONSHIP

1180
00:57:11,120 --> 00:57:11,480
Speaker 1: i think this.

1181
00:57:12,680 --> 00:57:15,560
Speaker 7: Now you, know even if they get divorced per, se,

1182
00:57:15,680 --> 00:57:18,840
Speaker 7: now she's gonna still go with the original guy, anyway.

1183
00:57:18,840 --> 00:57:21,120
Speaker 2: And that's the end of this. Story let's head to

1184
00:57:21,160 --> 00:57:25,200
Speaker 2: the next. One, hey It's, dakota your favorite goofball host

1185
00:57:25,240 --> 00:57:27,200
Speaker 2: here and we're gonna get back to the. Stories but

1186
00:57:27,240 --> 00:57:28,760
Speaker 2: here's three minutes of ads from our.

1187
00:57:28,800 --> 00:57:32,640
Speaker 3: Sponsors my boyfriend is jealous of me, financially SO i

1188
00:57:32,680 --> 00:57:34,560
Speaker 3: told THEM i won't get a. Job you know What

1189
00:57:34,880 --> 00:57:38,160
Speaker 3: i'm done, here you. Win i've been dating my boyfriend

1190
00:57:38,160 --> 00:57:40,120
Speaker 3: for a little bit over a year. Now we met

1191
00:57:40,160 --> 00:57:43,480
Speaker 3: through mutual friends and had a pretty usual relationship until.

1192
00:57:43,680 --> 00:57:46,920
Speaker 3: Now it wasn't, perfect but we never fought. Much he

1193
00:57:47,040 --> 00:57:49,360
Speaker 3: works as a manager in a restaurant While i'm still at.

1194
00:57:49,480 --> 00:57:52,520
Speaker 3: University by the, way this comes from WHEN winu and

1195
00:57:52,600 --> 00:57:54,640
Speaker 3: if you want to smit your own, stories go to the. Garslash,

1196
00:57:54,640 --> 00:57:58,600
Speaker 3: okay storytime severed. It I'm, Sophia I'm, Savannah i'm Keon.

1197
00:57:58,920 --> 00:58:00,919
Speaker 3: Ed we're here to give good, ofyeoofly but we don't

1198
00:58:00,920 --> 00:58:03,040
Speaker 3: have all the. Answers we only know what we'd, Do

1199
00:58:03,320 --> 00:58:04,440
Speaker 3: so let us know what you would do in the.

1200
00:58:04,440 --> 00:58:07,280
Speaker 3: Comments And hope says his life was pretty difficult from the,

1201
00:58:07,280 --> 00:58:10,000
Speaker 3: start since he grew up with heavy drinker parents and

1202
00:58:10,080 --> 00:58:13,400
Speaker 3: not much support in. General since day. One he had

1203
00:58:13,440 --> 00:58:16,160
Speaker 3: to work hard for even the most basic. Things he

1204
00:58:16,160 --> 00:58:19,160
Speaker 3: couldn't allow himself to get higher. Education he had to

1205
00:58:19,200 --> 00:58:22,520
Speaker 3: continuously work since he entered. ADULTHOOD, i on the other,

1206
00:58:22,560 --> 00:58:24,840
Speaker 3: hand to have a big family that always supports each.

1207
00:58:24,840 --> 00:58:27,760
Speaker 3: Other WHEN i started going to, university they continue to

1208
00:58:27,800 --> 00:58:30,680
Speaker 3: financially support. Me my parents help with the bills and

1209
00:58:30,720 --> 00:58:34,920
Speaker 3: give me some. Allowance, grandparents, aunts and uncles also often

1210
00:58:34,960 --> 00:58:37,160
Speaker 3: send things here and. There i'm on the campus for

1211
00:58:37,200 --> 00:58:39,440
Speaker 3: my lectures most of the, time BUT i also tutor

1212
00:58:39,520 --> 00:58:42,120
Speaker 3: three times a, week getting enough money from it for.

1213
00:58:42,160 --> 00:58:45,040
Speaker 3: Groceries i'm good at living below my needs and, savings

1214
00:58:45,120 --> 00:58:47,720
Speaker 3: SO i don't need that much. Cash all that background

1215
00:58:47,760 --> 00:58:50,800
Speaker 3: is needed for you to understand where our conflicts. Started

1216
00:58:50,960 --> 00:58:53,680
Speaker 3: around a month, ago my boyfriend started making little comments

1217
00:58:53,680 --> 00:58:56,600
Speaker 3: about my financial. Situation he would, say it's nice to

1218
00:58:56,640 --> 00:59:00,360
Speaker 3: spend someone else's, money or you wouldn't survive if you

1219
00:59:00,400 --> 00:59:01,680
Speaker 3: had to work for all that money the WAY i.

1220
00:59:01,720 --> 00:59:04,640
Speaker 4: Do, No, no he's not triggering.

1221
00:59:04,760 --> 00:59:08,760
Speaker 3: TRIGGERING i immediately caught onto those, comments BUT i didn't

1222
00:59:08,760 --> 00:59:11,240
Speaker 3: think it would grow into something. MORE i thought that

1223
00:59:11,240 --> 00:59:12,600
Speaker 3: maybe he's just fussy.

1224
00:59:12,320 --> 00:59:13,080
Speaker 4: Because he's over.

1225
00:59:13,080 --> 00:59:13,120
Speaker 1: It.

1226
00:59:13,200 --> 00:59:16,160
Speaker 3: WORKS i try to be, understanding knowing it must be

1227
00:59:16,200 --> 00:59:17,800
Speaker 3: difficult for him to work as much as he.

1228
00:59:17,880 --> 00:59:18,120
Speaker 4: Does.

1229
00:59:18,280 --> 00:59:20,880
Speaker 3: YEP i propose that maybe we should move in together

1230
00:59:21,000 --> 00:59:22,520
Speaker 3: to lessen the burden of all the bills on.

1231
00:59:22,600 --> 00:59:22,960
Speaker 6: Him that.

1232
00:59:25,080 --> 00:59:29,160
Speaker 3: You already have financial problems and he's being very passive

1233
00:59:29,200 --> 00:59:31,919
Speaker 3: aggressive towards, you and you want to move in with,

1234
00:59:32,040 --> 00:59:35,000
Speaker 3: that ba, babe let's reverse back it, up back it.

1235
00:59:35,080 --> 00:59:37,120
Speaker 3: UP i even said THAT i can help him with

1236
00:59:37,160 --> 00:59:38,200
Speaker 3: some groceries from time to.

1237
00:59:38,240 --> 00:59:41,520
Speaker 4: Time bit bab. Babe he called.

1238
00:59:41,240 --> 00:59:45,080
Speaker 3: That insulting and said that he could never agree either

1239
00:59:45,200 --> 00:59:45,560
Speaker 3: of those.

1240
00:59:45,600 --> 00:59:46,040
Speaker 4: Ideas.

1241
00:59:46,160 --> 00:59:48,120
Speaker 3: Right he's too much of a. Man he has too

1242
00:59:48,160 --> 00:59:49,320
Speaker 3: much of an, ego too much.

1243
00:59:49,360 --> 00:59:52,400
Speaker 7: Pride it gets in your way of ever actually having

1244
00:59:52,400 --> 00:59:53,040
Speaker 7: a connection with.

1245
00:59:53,080 --> 00:59:55,440
Speaker 3: Someone got it clocked you, Immediately.

1246
00:59:55,720 --> 00:59:57,280
Speaker 4: Yep unfortunately it got.

1247
00:59:57,320 --> 01:00:00,520
Speaker 3: Worse. Yep it feels like almost every day fight as

1248
01:00:00,560 --> 01:00:03,560
Speaker 3: he calls me, lazy a trust fun, baby or says

1249
01:00:03,600 --> 01:00:05,840
Speaker 3: THAT i don't know what real life feels. Like he

1250
01:00:05,920 --> 01:00:09,600
Speaker 3: also started sending me random job, listings telling me to

1251
01:00:09,640 --> 01:00:11,840
Speaker 3: apply even THOUGH i don't have any time for those.

1252
01:00:11,960 --> 01:00:14,000
Speaker 3: Jobs the biggest fight was.

1253
01:00:14,160 --> 01:00:17,480
Speaker 1: YESTERDAY i need to know a how hot does he?

1254
01:00:17,880 --> 01:00:21,400
Speaker 1: Be how good is he in bed because there's nothing

1255
01:00:21,400 --> 01:00:25,040
Speaker 1: else he's. Contributing no, way no, way you're saying he's

1256
01:00:25,040 --> 01:00:25,400
Speaker 1: a nice.

1257
01:00:25,400 --> 01:00:27,280
Speaker 3: Guy don't sound like he a.

1258
01:00:27,320 --> 01:00:28,439
Speaker 6: Giver he definitely don't.

1259
01:00:28,440 --> 01:00:31,600
Speaker 3: Provide the next step is he's gonna ask to look

1260
01:00:31,600 --> 01:00:36,280
Speaker 3: at her bank. Accounts the biggest fight was. Yesterday he

1261
01:00:36,320 --> 01:00:38,720
Speaker 3: came over to my home for dinner and WHILE i was,

1262
01:00:38,760 --> 01:00:42,480
Speaker 3: cleaning started talking about another job. Listing by that POINT

1263
01:00:42,520 --> 01:00:44,920
Speaker 3: i was at my limit after seeing like a hundredth

1264
01:00:45,040 --> 01:00:47,959
Speaker 3: random job. OFFERED i blew up at him, angrily telling

1265
01:00:48,040 --> 01:00:49,840
Speaker 3: him to stop telling me to get a. Job that

1266
01:00:50,040 --> 01:00:53,760
Speaker 3: university is my university is my job and my main.

1267
01:00:53,840 --> 01:00:56,479
Speaker 3: FOCUS i must admit THAT i said some mean things

1268
01:00:56,560 --> 01:00:58,640
Speaker 3: along the lines of you only want me to get

1269
01:00:58,640 --> 01:01:01,600
Speaker 3: a job because you're jealous of my, situation of my family's,

1270
01:01:01,640 --> 01:01:02,760
Speaker 3: support which is.

1271
01:01:02,880 --> 01:01:05,040
Speaker 6: True, well because.

1272
01:01:04,760 --> 01:01:07,440
Speaker 7: Why does He he's, like, No, NO i don't want

1273
01:01:07,440 --> 01:01:09,520
Speaker 7: to put that burden on you of pain for any

1274
01:01:09,560 --> 01:01:11,720
Speaker 7: of my. Stuff like you, KNOW i don't want you

1275
01:01:11,760 --> 01:01:13,560
Speaker 7: to pay for groceries or pay for rent or. Anything

1276
01:01:13,800 --> 01:01:16,200
Speaker 7: but you need to get a. Job though you're not working,

1277
01:01:16,280 --> 01:01:19,920
Speaker 7: enough you're just. Studying you're. Studying this isn't a, Job.

1278
01:01:20,160 --> 01:01:22,880
Speaker 3: He, continues he stormed out and doesn't really talk to.

1279
01:01:22,920 --> 01:01:23,000
Speaker 2: Me.

1280
01:01:23,040 --> 01:01:26,000
Speaker 3: Now he sends short messages, back but he doesn't pick

1281
01:01:26,080 --> 01:01:29,040
Speaker 3: up his. PHONE i tried, apologizing but he tells me

1282
01:01:29,080 --> 01:01:30,760
Speaker 3: that he needs time to think everything.

1283
01:01:30,840 --> 01:01:31,640
Speaker 4: Through WHAT i, ever?

1284
01:01:31,720 --> 01:01:34,440
Speaker 6: Dud why do you need to? Apologize WAS i truly that?

1285
01:01:34,600 --> 01:01:36,160
Speaker 4: Harsh how DO i make him see my?

1286
01:01:36,240 --> 01:01:38,520
Speaker 3: Point or maybe he has a better point AND i

1287
01:01:38,560 --> 01:01:41,680
Speaker 3: should deny my family's support filling my schedule to the

1288
01:01:41,680 --> 01:01:44,160
Speaker 3: brim with union. Work is there even a way for

1289
01:01:44,280 --> 01:01:47,760
Speaker 3: us to? Reconcile please? Help this is my first serious

1290
01:01:47,800 --> 01:01:49,600
Speaker 3: relationship AND i don't want to mess it.

1291
01:01:49,720 --> 01:01:52,280
Speaker 2: Up we have an, update that's.

1292
01:01:52,360 --> 01:01:54,600
Speaker 6: Why but So, pece first real?

1293
01:01:54,640 --> 01:01:59,400
Speaker 3: Relationship, YEAH i want to hear your guys'. Thoughts kean,

1294
01:01:59,520 --> 01:02:04,320
Speaker 3: says first relationship, obvious It's. Benna what do you Think

1295
01:02:04,640 --> 01:02:06,200
Speaker 3: i'm throwing at this?

1296
01:02:06,280 --> 01:02:09,360
Speaker 7: Point i'm, sorry but like that's that's gonna piss me. Off,

1297
01:02:09,600 --> 01:02:11,680
Speaker 7: yeah do not tell me how to handle my finances

1298
01:02:11,760 --> 01:02:13,920
Speaker 7: just because your family doesn't support, you just because you

1299
01:02:14,000 --> 01:02:16,840
Speaker 7: came from a crap. FAMILY i have to feel bad for.

1300
01:02:16,880 --> 01:02:18,720
Speaker 7: You everyone has to feel. Bad you're a victim name

1301
01:02:18,760 --> 01:02:21,000
Speaker 7: and oh my, gosh don't even freaking get me.

1302
01:02:21,040 --> 01:02:24,680
Speaker 3: Started IF op had a habit of being LIKE i

1303
01:02:24,720 --> 01:02:28,080
Speaker 3: didn't have to, Work i'm you, know like rubbing in his,

1304
01:02:28,160 --> 01:02:33,160
Speaker 3: face or or, uh you, know acting as if she

1305
01:02:33,200 --> 01:02:35,680
Speaker 3: had the same struggles as, Him like if she were

1306
01:02:36,000 --> 01:02:39,240
Speaker 3: acting rudely in any, WAY.

1307
01:02:39,080 --> 01:02:39,600
Speaker 4: I would get.

1308
01:02:39,600 --> 01:02:42,960
Speaker 3: It but it seems like she's just going to school

1309
01:02:43,600 --> 01:02:49,200
Speaker 3: and also being, supported and he is, jealous incredibly jealous of,

1310
01:02:49,240 --> 01:02:51,240
Speaker 3: that to the point where he's gonna make it your

1311
01:02:51,480 --> 01:02:54,120
Speaker 3: problem and try to sabotage.

1312
01:02:54,160 --> 01:02:55,760
Speaker 4: You so don't fall for.

1313
01:02:55,840 --> 01:02:58,280
Speaker 3: IT i really don't like.

1314
01:02:58,320 --> 01:02:59,560
Speaker 4: That we're only on story.

1315
01:02:59,600 --> 01:03:01,760
Speaker 3: TWO i already want to flip the.

1316
01:03:01,960 --> 01:03:03,080
Speaker 4: Table, well we got an.

1317
01:03:03,160 --> 01:03:05,760
Speaker 3: UPDATE a lot of the comments advised me to break,

1318
01:03:05,840 --> 01:03:08,600
Speaker 3: up BUT i couldn't just do. That of course me,

1319
01:03:08,680 --> 01:03:12,280
Speaker 3: too of COURSE i get. IT i wanted to at

1320
01:03:12,320 --> 01:03:15,160
Speaker 3: least try and talk it, out foolishly hoping that suddenly

1321
01:03:15,200 --> 01:03:17,880
Speaker 3: we would find common ground and fix. EVERYTHING a few

1322
01:03:17,960 --> 01:03:20,600
Speaker 3: days after the, fight he finally called me to set

1323
01:03:20,640 --> 01:03:23,240
Speaker 3: up a meeting to discuss. Everything between the fight and

1324
01:03:23,280 --> 01:03:26,040
Speaker 3: the setup, Meeting i've been looking for some solutions, myself

1325
01:03:26,200 --> 01:03:29,120
Speaker 3: per advice on here and from MY irl. FRIENDS i

1326
01:03:29,200 --> 01:03:32,360
Speaker 3: tried looking for some outside support AND i researched some

1327
01:03:32,440 --> 01:03:33,760
Speaker 3: well rated but cheap.

1328
01:03:33,560 --> 01:03:34,360
Speaker 4: Therapists around the.

1329
01:03:34,400 --> 01:03:36,760
Speaker 3: Area when we finally, met he was the one who

1330
01:03:36,840 --> 01:03:39,560
Speaker 3: really wanted to. Speak, first he told me that he

1331
01:03:39,640 --> 01:03:42,000
Speaker 3: appreciated THAT i gave him a few days of space

1332
01:03:42,040 --> 01:03:44,600
Speaker 3: to think things. Through then he said that he hates

1333
01:03:44,680 --> 01:03:46,240
Speaker 3: to do it to, me but he needs to give

1334
01:03:46,280 --> 01:03:49,200
Speaker 3: me an. Ultimatum of course he. DOES i hate to do,

1335
01:03:49,280 --> 01:03:51,560
Speaker 3: it BUT I i have to IF i want to

1336
01:03:51,600 --> 01:03:53,840
Speaker 3: stay with. HIM i need to find a job and

1337
01:03:53,920 --> 01:03:56,200
Speaker 3: cut financial support from my family by the end of the.

1338
01:03:56,280 --> 01:03:57,320
Speaker 6: Month what's the other?

1339
01:03:57,400 --> 01:04:02,600
Speaker 7: Option that's actually in insane thing to do to the

1340
01:04:02,640 --> 01:04:04,520
Speaker 7: person that you supposedly.

1341
01:04:04,800 --> 01:04:05,800
Speaker 6: Love what's the other?

1342
01:04:05,840 --> 01:04:09,360
Speaker 3: OPTION i could see That no but in the world

1343
01:04:09,440 --> 01:04:11,640
Speaker 3: could sway him to change that choice.

1344
01:04:11,360 --> 01:04:13,120
Speaker 6: For, him not even. Mine no that could.

1345
01:04:13,120 --> 01:04:15,160
Speaker 3: WORK i didn't even have a chance to mention the

1346
01:04:15,200 --> 01:04:18,040
Speaker 3: Help i've been, researching kind of freezing for a moment.

1347
01:04:18,080 --> 01:04:21,720
Speaker 3: Instead it might sound, silly But i've never experienced love

1348
01:04:21,840 --> 01:04:24,520
Speaker 3: disappear as quickly as it did in that. Moment and

1349
01:04:24,600 --> 01:04:25,640
Speaker 3: now now you're a.

1350
01:04:28,440 --> 01:04:29,640
Speaker 5: So you want to talk about.

1351
01:04:29,800 --> 01:04:33,360
Speaker 3: Mother oh you want me to struggle like you? Struggled?

1352
01:04:33,640 --> 01:04:36,280
Speaker 7: Oh, Right BECAUSE i would never understand that UNLESS i

1353
01:04:36,440 --> 01:04:37,959
Speaker 7: just cut off my family for.

1354
01:04:37,920 --> 01:04:41,720
Speaker 3: You, yeah trying to build the ladder out from. UNDER

1355
01:04:41,960 --> 01:04:45,440
Speaker 3: i didn't even know that was. Possible his words broke

1356
01:04:45,480 --> 01:04:48,560
Speaker 3: whatever charm he had and made me see that ultimatum

1357
01:04:48,640 --> 01:04:51,320
Speaker 3: for what it truly was his attempt at managing my

1358
01:04:51,440 --> 01:04:54,760
Speaker 3: life to match whatever idea he had in his. Mind Damp,

1359
01:04:55,120 --> 01:04:57,600
Speaker 3: god you didn't move him with his. Guy, yeah, honestly,

1360
01:04:58,600 --> 01:05:01,280
Speaker 3: honestly And I'm i'm gonna.

1361
01:05:01,040 --> 01:05:06,520
Speaker 7: Put the the give the award to your family for

1362
01:05:06,600 --> 01:05:10,880
Speaker 7: having Good you have a great support system and great

1363
01:05:10,880 --> 01:05:13,760
Speaker 7: friends that look after you and not just be, like,

1364
01:05:14,160 --> 01:05:14,880
Speaker 7: OH i don't, KNOW.

1365
01:05:14,960 --> 01:05:16,919
Speaker 4: I guess you should just do this if you love.

1366
01:05:16,960 --> 01:05:21,960
Speaker 3: Them, yes, honestly great point because op saw this blazing

1367
01:05:22,040 --> 01:05:24,640
Speaker 3: red flag and, went, OH i know what real love is,

1368
01:05:24,720 --> 01:05:28,240
Speaker 3: like not. This, yeah and that is Exactly.

1369
01:05:28,320 --> 01:05:29,000
Speaker 4: YEAH i completely.

1370
01:05:29,040 --> 01:05:31,400
Speaker 3: Agree that is a huge testament to the love and

1371
01:05:31,400 --> 01:05:32,200
Speaker 3: support that you already.

1372
01:05:32,200 --> 01:05:32,280
Speaker 1: Have.

1373
01:05:32,400 --> 01:05:34,480
Speaker 4: Yep good for, YOU opm completely.

1374
01:05:34,480 --> 01:05:36,800
Speaker 3: Agree all the comments from you are flooded my mind

1375
01:05:36,840 --> 01:05:38,880
Speaker 3: AS i realized that all of you were. Correct sorry

1376
01:05:38,880 --> 01:05:41,600
Speaker 3: for even doubting you. ALL i broke things off. IMMEDIATELY

1377
01:05:41,960 --> 01:05:43,720
Speaker 3: i WISH i could say THAT i told them something

1378
01:05:43,800 --> 01:05:46,920
Speaker 3: smart or. Cheeky BUT i literally just Said i'm done and.

1379
01:05:47,000 --> 01:05:48,120
Speaker 4: Left that is.

1380
01:05:48,120 --> 01:05:51,320
Speaker 3: Smart and, cheeky tearing up the whole way back. Home

1381
01:05:51,600 --> 01:05:53,680
Speaker 3: he called and messaged me a lot since, then.

1382
01:05:53,600 --> 01:05:56,400
Speaker 4: Saying that maybe we can discuss. Things oh, oh now

1383
01:05:57,560 --> 01:05:58,400
Speaker 4: that it doesn't have to be an.

1384
01:05:58,440 --> 01:05:59,000
Speaker 3: Ultimatum.

1385
01:05:59,080 --> 01:06:02,640
Speaker 7: Ah, really you know What i'm going? Say refer to

1386
01:06:02,680 --> 01:06:06,680
Speaker 7: my Book Too, little too? Late, yes, chapter let's SEE

1387
01:06:06,720 --> 01:06:09,720
Speaker 7: i think. Sixteen now get out of.

1388
01:06:09,760 --> 01:06:11,680
Speaker 4: Here uh, oh he. SAYS i don't think there's a

1389
01:06:11,720 --> 01:06:13,360
Speaker 4: way of fixing things.

1390
01:06:13,080 --> 01:06:14,080
Speaker 6: Other than being.

1391
01:06:14,080 --> 01:06:18,400
Speaker 3: Physical Physical, GOD i think you should physically leave what

1392
01:06:18,520 --> 01:06:22,440
Speaker 3: you already did and know that you have a support

1393
01:06:22,480 --> 01:06:26,200
Speaker 3: system and trust your, gut because your gut's. Right i'd

1394
01:06:26,240 --> 01:06:27,840
Speaker 3: be lying IF i said THAT i don't have any

1395
01:06:27,880 --> 01:06:31,080
Speaker 3: love left. Room it was my first serious relationship THAT

1396
01:06:31,160 --> 01:06:34,080
Speaker 3: i thought might genuinely, last but now it turned into

1397
01:06:34,120 --> 01:06:37,160
Speaker 3: my first serious. Breakup things are a bit difficult now

1398
01:06:37,200 --> 01:06:39,800
Speaker 3: AS i grieve the idea of my first, love BUT

1399
01:06:39,880 --> 01:06:42,080
Speaker 3: i know That i'll get better sooner or. Later if

1400
01:06:42,120 --> 01:06:44,040
Speaker 3: you were, me what would you tell mutual friends in

1401
01:06:44,080 --> 01:06:47,040
Speaker 3: a situation like? This marty getting asked by our friends

1402
01:06:47,080 --> 01:06:49,800
Speaker 3: about what exactly, Happened But i'm worried that IF i

1403
01:06:49,840 --> 01:06:52,840
Speaker 3: tell them the, truth this whole drama will continue and

1404
01:06:52,960 --> 01:06:55,080
Speaker 3: people will be talking about it AND i won't be

1405
01:06:55,080 --> 01:06:58,360
Speaker 3: able to emotionally rest from the. Situation, well, girl you

1406
01:06:58,400 --> 01:06:59,720
Speaker 3: gotta tell trust to.

1407
01:06:59,760 --> 01:07:01,919
Speaker 4: People you got you gotta tell.

1408
01:07:02,400 --> 01:07:04,120
Speaker 3: People you gotta, talk you gotta let that, out you

1409
01:07:04,160 --> 01:07:05,480
Speaker 3: gotta talk about, It you got to talk through.

1410
01:07:05,480 --> 01:07:07,560
Speaker 6: It people are going to keep asking, you like what

1411
01:07:07,720 --> 01:07:09,480
Speaker 6: happened To people are gonna talk to your.

1412
01:07:09,520 --> 01:07:11,720
Speaker 7: Way whether you give him a story or, don't people

1413
01:07:11,760 --> 01:07:13,280
Speaker 7: are gonna, Talk so you might as well just get

1414
01:07:13,280 --> 01:07:15,480
Speaker 7: the fact. Straight i'm tended to just tell them it

1415
01:07:15,520 --> 01:07:17,640
Speaker 7: was a mutual breakup or, something just to be done

1416
01:07:17,680 --> 01:07:20,080
Speaker 7: with it and leave it in the, past and that's.

1417
01:07:19,920 --> 01:07:20,600
Speaker 3: The end of that.

1418
01:07:20,680 --> 01:07:24,520
Speaker 7: Story oh, Oh like she's just kind of. Embarrassed, yeah

1419
01:07:24,560 --> 01:07:27,680
Speaker 7: and you understand embarrassed About, YEAH i, MEAN i get,

1420
01:07:27,720 --> 01:07:29,840
Speaker 7: It like you thought this was going to be great

1421
01:07:29,880 --> 01:07:32,680
Speaker 7: and then all of a sudden your world flipped and it's, like,

1422
01:07:32,840 --> 01:07:35,720
Speaker 7: oh NOW i have to explain that to.

1423
01:07:35,760 --> 01:07:37,600
Speaker 1: EVERYONE i Think op is going to be, like, oh

1424
01:07:37,600 --> 01:07:40,040
Speaker 1: people are gonna judge, me LIKE i Think i'm a bad.

1425
01:07:40,080 --> 01:07:42,520
Speaker 6: Guy, yeah no for doing the right.

1426
01:07:42,560 --> 01:07:46,600
Speaker 7: Thing, yeah, yeah he's he's not good for, you and,

1427
01:07:46,880 --> 01:07:47,480
Speaker 7: TRUTHFULLY i.

1428
01:07:47,440 --> 01:07:48,600
Speaker 4: Don't think he's good to himself.

1429
01:07:48,640 --> 01:07:48,800
Speaker 3: Either.

1430
01:07:48,920 --> 01:07:51,200
Speaker 7: YEAH, ok this is just like he secretly hates himself

1431
01:07:51,280 --> 01:07:52,680
Speaker 7: and then is projecting that onto.

1432
01:07:52,680 --> 01:07:54,760
Speaker 6: YOU opi this is your first real.

1433
01:07:54,840 --> 01:07:58,000
Speaker 1: Relationship, yeah you're going to learn and you're going to find,

1434
01:07:58,000 --> 01:08:00,880
Speaker 1: someone and you'd be, like oh my, Gosh i'm so.

1435
01:08:00,920 --> 01:08:01,640
Speaker 6: Heavy i'm not with.

1436
01:08:01,760 --> 01:08:04,320
Speaker 3: That what a breath of freaking fresh, air, right.

1437
01:08:04,920 --> 01:08:05,880
Speaker 2: And that's the end of this.

1438
01:08:05,960 --> 01:08:06,280
Speaker 4: Story