WEBVTT - A Hidden Jewel 0:00:00.080 --> 0:00:02.400 Be sure to catch live editions of the Ben Maller 0:00:02.480 --> 0:00:05.600 Show weekdays at two a m. Eastern eleven pm Pacific. 0:00:07.960 --> 0:00:11.400 If you thought four hours a day, minutes a week 0:00:11.560 --> 0:00:14.960 was enough, I think again. He's the last remnants of 0:00:14.960 --> 0:00:18.599 the old Republic, a sole fashion of fairness. He treats 0:00:18.640 --> 0:00:21.480 crackheads in the ghetto cutter the same as the rich 0:00:21.560 --> 0:00:25.560 pill poppers in the penthouse. The clearing House of Hot 0:00:25.600 --> 0:00:29.319 takes break free for something special. The Fifth Hour with 0:00:29.520 --> 0:00:34.720 Ben Maller starts right now. Nine that it does. We 0:00:34.760 --> 0:00:40.120 are in the air everywhere, as we are all over 0:00:40.159 --> 0:00:44.520 the globe. Magic, the power of podcasting, the global reach. 0:00:44.520 --> 0:00:48.479 We thank you for downloading this or Saturday podcast. Eight 0:00:48.720 --> 0:00:52.080 days a week, eight days a week, four hours obviously 0:00:52.200 --> 0:00:55.120 not enough on the overnight. And you can hear this 0:00:55.200 --> 0:00:57.800 podcast where you found it, but anywhere in the I 0:00:57.960 --> 0:01:02.320 Heart podcast network available. We're ever you get your podcasts. 0:01:02.400 --> 0:01:05.640 And we learned from our friend Andy Firman yesterday the 0:01:05.680 --> 0:01:09.280 most important connection is the personal connection. So if you 0:01:09.319 --> 0:01:13.800 can tell a friend in your circle that you like 0:01:13.920 --> 0:01:16.319 the podcast, hey give it a listen, man, That would 0:01:16.360 --> 0:01:18.560 that be cool? That would really help us out a lot. 0:01:18.959 --> 0:01:21.240 We are joined from west of the four oh five, 0:01:21.400 --> 0:01:26.679 sacheting his way in doing the foxtrot. David Gascon, better 0:01:26.680 --> 0:01:30.840 known by his nickname Gascon. Yes, that's exactly right. I 0:01:30.880 --> 0:01:33.280 didn't catch what you were saying initially because I was 0:01:33.840 --> 0:01:38.000 busy looking at booty models on Instagram. But uh, it's 0:01:38.040 --> 0:01:40.480 wonderful and he and he was great man and he's 0:01:41.360 --> 0:01:44.440 and he is awesome. I love I love those old stories. 0:01:44.480 --> 0:01:46.680 I I could have listened to Andy talk all night, 0:01:46.720 --> 0:01:49.800 that story about Belichick asking him for a tape for 0:01:50.120 --> 0:01:54.120 an upcoming opponent. When you compare and contrast the difference 0:01:54.160 --> 0:01:57.720 between what's going on these days and the video departments 0:01:57.720 --> 0:02:00.320 of all these teams and some of the promote otions 0:02:00.360 --> 0:02:02.760 that Andy did back in the day, Oh god, what 0:02:02.880 --> 0:02:04.760 a what a great he He's got to write a book. 0:02:04.760 --> 0:02:06.080 I don't know if he did write. Maybe he's written 0:02:06.080 --> 0:02:08.240 a book, but he should write one about all those stories. 0:02:08.280 --> 0:02:10.880 But it's just wild because you've done this with other 0:02:10.919 --> 0:02:13.440 guests that you've brought onto, But it's wild to hear 0:02:14.320 --> 0:02:17.840 the stories of then. And immediately when we're done and 0:02:17.880 --> 0:02:20.760 we talked about it, we just say that ship would 0:02:20.800 --> 0:02:25.440 never work today. Oh no, you know everyone's looking for 0:02:25.480 --> 0:02:29.160 something to be offended by. These days, you know, the 0:02:29.240 --> 0:02:33.320 offended mob, the always offended mob is is out there. 0:02:33.320 --> 0:02:36.360 Everyone's offended by everything. And of course it used to 0:02:36.360 --> 0:02:38.800 be that we would say, like, just because you think 0:02:38.919 --> 0:02:41.400 you're offended and you say you're offended, that does not 0:02:41.720 --> 0:02:45.480 qualify something as offensive. These days, just the act of 0:02:45.560 --> 0:02:49.080 saying something is offensive means it's offensive. And I learned 0:02:49.200 --> 0:02:55.960 a few days ago that sexual preference is offensive. Yes, yes, 0:02:56.280 --> 0:03:01.000 Well I also learned that if a certain political parties 0:03:01.440 --> 0:03:07.000 representation says something within hours, a certain dictionary will change 0:03:07.040 --> 0:03:09.919 the definition. It's an amazing power. I had an idea. 0:03:10.080 --> 0:03:13.120 I thought I thought politicians are just politicians. I didn't 0:03:13.120 --> 0:03:15.360 know they had the power to change the definition of 0:03:15.440 --> 0:03:17.840 words within hours. I had no idea. Well, we're we 0:03:17.919 --> 0:03:21.120 are learning that certain politicians and certain groups have the 0:03:21.160 --> 0:03:25.080 power to manipulate and change and and even suppress certain 0:03:25.440 --> 0:03:29.240 content due to social media influences and whatnot. So this 0:03:29.320 --> 0:03:32.080 is a time to be alive. But now that is, 0:03:32.240 --> 0:03:34.519 let me tell you something. That situation that happened the 0:03:34.520 --> 0:03:37.920 other day with Facebook and Twitter, Uh, that is going 0:03:37.960 --> 0:03:42.560 to be their demise. Okay, because at some point, there's 0:03:42.600 --> 0:03:45.360 gonna be a come to Jesus moment where the political 0:03:46.400 --> 0:03:49.200 oligarchy in America get together and say, well, wait a minute, 0:03:49.240 --> 0:03:51.800 I mean this these it's a weird thing because those 0:03:51.840 --> 0:03:55.640 are technically private companies Twitter and Facebook, but it has 0:03:55.720 --> 0:04:02.240 become the public square. And so you know, television and 0:04:02.040 --> 0:04:07.000 and radio stations are are technically owned by private people, 0:04:07.040 --> 0:04:11.560 but they're licensed by the government, so there's rules and regulations. Obviously, 0:04:11.560 --> 0:04:13.520 it's the way it works, right. You You can own 0:04:14.160 --> 0:04:17.320 like I Heart Media owns a ton of radio stations, right, 0:04:18.040 --> 0:04:21.480 but those radio stations are governed by the rules of 0:04:21.560 --> 0:04:24.800 the Federal Communications. Now. I don't like the red tape, 0:04:24.839 --> 0:04:26.599 and I don't like the rules, and I would hate 0:04:26.640 --> 0:04:31.719 to see more bureaucracy. But you can't be you can't 0:04:31.720 --> 0:04:36.040 be bullying and taking stories away because they don't fit 0:04:36.120 --> 0:04:39.880 your agenda when they're legitimate stories. Cannot do. It a 0:04:39.920 --> 0:04:43.240 little odd that you'd have a company like Twitter or Facebook, 0:04:44.320 --> 0:04:48.080 um try to suppress journalists and say, what hold on? 0:04:48.120 --> 0:04:51.800 We have the journalistic integrity, the fact the fact checkers. 0:04:51.800 --> 0:04:56.120 I get the biggest kig checkers. Who the hell, who 0:04:56.160 --> 0:04:59.040 the funk are your fact checkers? Oh my god, it's 0:04:59.080 --> 0:05:02.080 the high moral authority from these twenty two, twenty three 0:05:02.160 --> 0:05:04.400 year olds that just got out of college that are 0:05:04.440 --> 0:05:06.680 your fact checker. You got a bunch of hyper sensitive, 0:05:06.920 --> 0:05:11.040 you know, full outraged half wits that are are deciding, 0:05:11.279 --> 0:05:16.599 Oh no, no, no, oh my god. It's maddening. It 0:05:16.720 --> 0:05:18.720 is maddening, is what it is. It is good and 0:05:18.760 --> 0:05:22.920 it was great because yeah, the the the the Q 0:05:23.080 --> 0:05:26.919 and A was Centator Herono from Hawaii and Amy Coney 0:05:26.960 --> 0:05:31.560 Barrett talking about sexual orientation or sexual preference and then 0:05:31.560 --> 0:05:35.160 immediately Webster's Dictionary just flips that thing and makes it 0:05:35.200 --> 0:05:39.040 into offensive. It was just it was fascinating to see 0:05:39.160 --> 0:05:41.800 in real time because if that was on some kind 0:05:41.839 --> 0:05:45.000 of music or music a magazine stand, you would think 0:05:45.000 --> 0:05:48.719 that it's just like gossip coming from a from a tabloid. 0:05:48.760 --> 0:05:51.080 But nope, this is this is the real world. This 0:05:51.120 --> 0:05:56.160 is Yeah, it's pretty pretty crazy. And some people downplay it, 0:05:56.200 --> 0:05:59.120 says it's not that big a deal, but it's a 0:05:59.120 --> 0:06:02.160 lot different than it is. And I'm not thinking it's better. 0:06:02.320 --> 0:06:04.360 I don't think it's better. So we can we could 0:06:04.360 --> 0:06:07.600 go from pay phones and rotary phones to cell phones, 0:06:08.360 --> 0:06:13.239 but holy fuck, like we are changing as we speak 0:06:13.320 --> 0:06:17.000 the way that we are and are not allowed to 0:06:17.000 --> 0:06:21.240 to communicate with each other. Yeah, I I hate to 0:06:21.640 --> 0:06:23.520 go down this road, but you you brought it up, 0:06:23.520 --> 0:06:25.520 so we'll go down this road. Like the when I 0:06:25.600 --> 0:06:27.800 when I was a kid. You know those nursery you 0:06:27.839 --> 0:06:30.560 know the nursery rhymes. Everyone's when you were a little kid. 0:06:30.600 --> 0:06:32.520 You do the nursery rhymes and all that stuff. But 0:06:32.800 --> 0:06:35.440 remember the one sticks and stones may bake my bones, 0:06:35.480 --> 0:06:37.880 but names will never hurt me. Remember that one? What 0:06:38.000 --> 0:06:42.279 happened to that one? Right? You know? Now? It's you know, row, 0:06:42.560 --> 0:06:45.839 row your boat gently down the stream, merrily, merrily, merrily. 0:06:46.040 --> 0:06:48.080 Life is but a dream. It's apparently just a dream. 0:06:48.200 --> 0:06:50.880 It's all. It's all a dream. But I like the 0:06:51.000 --> 0:06:53.520 a sticks and stones thing. I think that's you know, 0:06:54.680 --> 0:06:57.719 that's a good thing. Sticks and stones may break my bones, 0:06:57.760 --> 0:07:00.760 but names will never hurt me. My god, how hard that? Yeah, 0:07:00.800 --> 0:07:03.600 he's I think that I heard that thing loud and 0:07:03.680 --> 0:07:06.440 proud when I was a child, And uh, it's on 0:07:06.600 --> 0:07:10.120 display every time I work with you. Now, it's all huffing, puffing, 0:07:10.200 --> 0:07:17.240 blow your house down. You can really translate anything in 0:07:17.280 --> 0:07:20.440 life to a nursery run you can, You certainly can. 0:07:21.000 --> 0:07:24.680 That's a lot of there's a lot of rock goodbiite baby, 0:07:27.880 --> 0:07:29.840 which is great because you know that they have these 0:07:29.840 --> 0:07:33.760 places now set up at universities. Oh yeah, I've heard 0:07:33.760 --> 0:07:36.640 those stories where they have the safe spaces and that 0:07:37.160 --> 0:07:40.640 they maybe Adam Carolla made a movie about that last year, 0:07:40.680 --> 0:07:43.640 a documentary about just that whole mindset and all that. 0:07:43.840 --> 0:07:46.560 The the rogue agent here that's a citizen of the 0:07:46.640 --> 0:07:50.840 United States and resides in California, is he moving to 0:07:50.920 --> 0:07:54.320 Nashville too? I think everyone's moving to Nashville. Everyone'sville or 0:07:54.360 --> 0:07:59.840 Texas or Arizona, I don't know, somewhere someplace. So on 0:08:00.040 --> 0:08:03.200 this podcast, we have one man's trash, there's another man's treasure. 0:08:03.560 --> 0:08:07.240 We've got Alvin and the Chipmunks and pop Quiz. All right, 0:08:07.280 --> 0:08:09.120 that's what we got. And we already started with some 0:08:09.160 --> 0:08:13.560 political theater, which is which is good. I love the 0:08:13.600 --> 0:08:17.640 Honorable Senator Ben Sass from Nebraska who, uh, we did 0:08:17.640 --> 0:08:19.600 a monologue on it the other day and a bunch 0:08:19.640 --> 0:08:25.440 of the astro fans got all upset, but it was wonderful. 0:08:25.880 --> 0:08:31.440 And Ben Sass, who called at a judicial hearing judicial 0:08:31.480 --> 0:08:35.400 hearing for a US Supreme Court nominee. Uh he said 0:08:35.440 --> 0:08:38.880 that Astros are miserable cheaters. My god, was that great? 0:08:39.040 --> 0:08:41.600 And the best part about it was he didn't use 0:08:41.640 --> 0:08:43.440 it like he was just trying to slide in a 0:08:43.520 --> 0:08:46.600 quick liner. He actually laid it out. I saw the 0:08:46.600 --> 0:08:49.320 clip that you sent. It was five minutes. But he 0:08:49.440 --> 0:08:52.320 laid it out perfectly. And he went into how they 0:08:52.320 --> 0:08:55.280 should have been penalized a lot more severe than they were. 0:08:55.520 --> 0:08:57.640 It was just great. And then he took shots obviously 0:08:57.679 --> 0:09:00.720 across the room in the judicial process. Yeah, and it 0:09:00.760 --> 0:09:02.160 was good, and it was you know, the people with 0:09:02.240 --> 0:09:04.719 no sense of humor that was stick up their ass. They, Oh, 0:09:04.840 --> 0:09:09.080 I can't believe me did that? Oh my god, screw. 0:09:09.120 --> 0:09:11.040 I don't care. I know he's a Republican, but if 0:09:11.080 --> 0:09:13.800 you're a Democrat or a Republican, you should smile. That's 0:09:13.920 --> 0:09:17.040 that's if you have bipartisan support. As I said I 0:09:17.040 --> 0:09:19.120 think in the monologue the other day, is that that 0:09:19.240 --> 0:09:23.319 was it was hilarious. So which is atrocious because as 0:09:23.360 --> 0:09:28.239 soon as the Astros advanced to the ALCS, I immediately 0:09:28.360 --> 0:09:32.960 see Twitter handles based in Houston from radio stations tagging 0:09:33.000 --> 0:09:37.199 you on tweets, and you know, I'm just like, come on, man, like, 0:09:37.320 --> 0:09:39.760 oh yeah, with a local I I get a kick 0:09:39.800 --> 0:09:43.920 out of it. The local hack, local radio fanboy hack, 0:09:44.080 --> 0:09:48.040 I called him, uh, and I I find it very amusing. 0:09:48.120 --> 0:09:51.080 I I'm honored that I have the bulls eye pointed 0:09:51.120 --> 0:09:53.320 at me by the local radio hack. That tells me 0:09:53.360 --> 0:09:56.200 I'm doing a good job. It does. It tells me, 0:09:56.280 --> 0:09:58.320 hey that you're you're you're doing good. This is a 0:09:58.360 --> 0:10:01.680 good thing. Don't stop what you're doing at all, never changed, 0:10:02.120 --> 0:10:05.280 never changed. Yeah, it's like, uh, we're all going to 0:10:05.360 --> 0:10:08.680 defend the hometown team, no matter how embarrassing they are. 0:10:08.960 --> 0:10:12.840 My god, come on, but you you've had it with teams, 0:10:12.880 --> 0:10:17.080 You've had it with radio stations, You've had scribes, and 0:10:17.080 --> 0:10:20.040 now you're having on social media accounts to It's amazing. 0:10:20.280 --> 0:10:23.240 I've had people threatened to sue me. I had Do 0:10:23.320 --> 0:10:25.040 you know that story? Actually, I don't know if I've 0:10:25.040 --> 0:10:28.160 told the story before, but the late czet Copic, who 0:10:28.280 --> 0:10:31.200 was a Chicago radio person. I'm actually friend of Mike North. 0:10:31.200 --> 0:10:33.760 I didn't bring this up to Mike, but I wrote 0:10:33.800 --> 0:10:39.160 something on my website about check Copic and he emailed 0:10:39.200 --> 0:10:42.520 me and threatened to assume me because he said it 0:10:42.559 --> 0:10:45.520 wasn't it was true what I wrote, and he threatened assume. 0:10:45.559 --> 0:10:49.880 He was all upsetting. He starts attacking me, my my broadcasting. 0:10:49.880 --> 0:10:52.720 He was like, very very upset. That's great. What when 0:10:52.760 --> 0:10:54.800 you said that story? Because he's dead now, but we 0:10:54.880 --> 0:10:57.120 were allowed to say it. But yeah, do you remember 0:10:57.160 --> 0:11:00.240 like the meat and potatoes of it all? You know, 0:11:00.320 --> 0:11:03.200 he was doing a radio like a syndicated type radio thing, 0:11:03.559 --> 0:11:08.880 and I think I had been tipped off to to 0:11:09.040 --> 0:11:12.199 something that that he was doing that, or was it 0:11:12.240 --> 0:11:14.040 was was doing that he got he got he was 0:11:14.040 --> 0:11:16.079 gonna get in trouble for something, and I wrote about 0:11:16.120 --> 0:11:17.760 it and he said it was bullshit and he got 0:11:17.760 --> 0:11:19.880 all upset. And was he recording his show and then 0:11:19.920 --> 0:11:22.400 playing it as it was live? I don't, I don't 0:11:22.440 --> 0:11:24.760 remember these specifics. I had to go back the archives 0:11:24.800 --> 0:11:26.800 of Ben Mallard dot com, which are on the way 0:11:26.840 --> 0:11:30.000 back Machine. I could probably find find the story and 0:11:30.120 --> 0:11:33.280 it still active Ben mallare dot com. No, no, that 0:11:33.280 --> 0:11:34.840 that guy website is gone, but if you go to 0:11:34.840 --> 0:11:39.120 the way back Machine, it archives some of the posts 0:11:39.200 --> 0:11:41.760 that I made there. Yeah, Chet died, I think in 0:11:41.760 --> 0:11:46.520 a car accident. Last was it last year? I think yeah? Unfortunately, 0:11:47.320 --> 0:11:49.839 But he was a legend in Chicago media. He was 0:11:49.880 --> 0:11:53.000 like the godfather of Chicago sports radio. But he didn't 0:11:53.000 --> 0:11:56.280 like me. You didn't like me. But you know, no 0:11:56.280 --> 0:11:59.720 one's perfect, right, No one's perfect. So anyway, let's go 0:11:59.840 --> 0:12:01.840 we what do we have here? We have One man's 0:12:01.880 --> 0:12:04.640 trash is the man treasure. So this is another personal story, guest, 0:12:04.880 --> 0:12:08.080 I must be relatable. So I enjoy suburban hiking. I 0:12:08.080 --> 0:12:10.640 got my headphones in Uh. In fact, I I talked 0:12:10.640 --> 0:12:13.080 to you. Sometimes I make a few phone calls. Usually 0:12:13.120 --> 0:12:15.720 I listened to some tunes or whatever. Maybe a game 0:12:15.800 --> 0:12:18.360 if it's it's an afternoon game when I'm walking around 0:12:18.920 --> 0:12:22.800 in baseball, So I'm I'm always when I'm walking, I'm 0:12:22.840 --> 0:12:27.880 always rotating my eyes. I'm observing my surroundings. Uh. And 0:12:28.200 --> 0:12:33.880 this week that paid dividends, opportunity structure. I'm walking down 0:12:33.880 --> 0:12:39.240 a pretty busy highway that is near near the Mallard mansion, 0:12:39.280 --> 0:12:42.760 and I'm I'm walking there, and I'm as i'm walking, 0:12:42.800 --> 0:12:46.800 I'm counting the I call them idiots who while driving 0:12:46.840 --> 0:12:49.760 wear their masks in the car with the window up. 0:12:49.840 --> 0:12:52.040 You know that the word that by being in the 0:12:52.040 --> 0:12:55.199 car with the window up, they might get the corona. UM. 0:12:55.240 --> 0:12:57.720 So I I always count them, and I'm I'm looking 0:12:57.720 --> 0:12:59.600 to make sure no one's gonna hit me or try 0:12:59.640 --> 0:13:04.360 to um. And then I stumbled on a pile of garbage. 0:13:04.880 --> 0:13:09.199 So on the right I'm going, I'm going like north. 0:13:09.720 --> 0:13:12.120 On the right of me is the highway. On the 0:13:12.200 --> 0:13:16.280 left of me is like this kind of disheveled part 0:13:16.320 --> 0:13:20.800 of town where it's like an empty field. Right, so whatever, 0:13:20.840 --> 0:13:23.600 I'm walking and surrounded by businesses, but this this just 0:13:23.640 --> 0:13:25.960 happens to be empty. And as I'm walking, I get 0:13:26.000 --> 0:13:28.040 near this empty field and I see this big pile 0:13:28.200 --> 0:13:33.080 of discarded clothes, and there's a there's a shopping cart, 0:13:34.280 --> 0:13:37.360 there were some street signs, some traffic cones that it's 0:13:37.440 --> 0:13:41.760 all random, like a hodgepodge of crap that was just there, um. 0:13:41.840 --> 0:13:46.360 And there was some random paper trash. And then I 0:13:46.440 --> 0:13:49.360 had a diamond in the rough that I witnessed guests 0:13:49.400 --> 0:13:53.440 gun in the middle of that trash. In the middle 0:13:53.480 --> 0:13:57.320 of that just random discarded clothes and stuff that people 0:13:57.360 --> 0:14:02.640 just tossed off the street was day laundry matt grade 0:14:02.760 --> 0:14:07.280 rolling cart in great condition, right in the middle, and 0:14:07.320 --> 0:14:09.760 it called out to me. It said, Ben, take me 0:14:09.840 --> 0:14:12.440 to the Mallard mansion. I need to go to the 0:14:12.480 --> 0:14:17.200 Mallard mansion. And I'm like, whoa right, So I immediately 0:14:17.240 --> 0:14:19.160 at that moment, I couldn't take it at that time 0:14:19.160 --> 0:14:20.800 because I was in the middle of my way. So 0:14:20.920 --> 0:14:27.200 I decided I needed to salvage this orphan laundry Mack 0:14:27.240 --> 0:14:30.240 grade rolling card, which some people would say as a 0:14:30.280 --> 0:14:32.000 piece of junk, and I had to take it to 0:14:32.080 --> 0:14:33.840 the to the mat matchion. So I made a deal 0:14:33.880 --> 0:14:36.960 with myself, guest gun, I said, when I am done 0:14:36.960 --> 0:14:38.840 with this walk, when I'm making I was far away 0:14:38.880 --> 0:14:41.000 from my my house at that time, and when I 0:14:41.040 --> 0:14:44.080 make it back to the house, I'm gonna be back here. 0:14:44.160 --> 0:14:47.640 I'm gonna save. I'm the savior. I'm gonna save that 0:14:48.600 --> 0:14:53.479 laundry mac grade rolling card, a clothing card. So I 0:14:53.560 --> 0:14:55.240 walked by. I went back to the house, and then 0:14:55.720 --> 0:14:57.000 I had to go to the store anyway. I had 0:14:57.040 --> 0:14:59.400 to pick up some things for the wife, a couple 0:14:59.400 --> 0:15:02.680 ofion of vegetables and some crap like that. So on 0:15:02.840 --> 0:15:07.080 the way to the store, I made a pit stop. 0:15:08.040 --> 0:15:11.680 I turned on my emergency blinkers. I stopped on the 0:15:11.720 --> 0:15:14.600 side of that busy highway. I got out, I opened 0:15:14.840 --> 0:15:16.840 the reel of the rear of the car, and my 0:15:16.880 --> 0:15:19.160 wife had left some crap in there, so I had 0:15:19.160 --> 0:15:23.480 to move stuff around because this laundromatt grade rolling cart 0:15:23.640 --> 0:15:27.200 was so massive that it would not fit in the 0:15:27.200 --> 0:15:29.120 back of the car. Because there was other stuff that 0:15:29.200 --> 0:15:30.800 I had to move things around. And as he took 0:15:30.800 --> 0:15:34.560 a lot longer than I wanted, emergency blinkers are flashing 0:15:34.600 --> 0:15:36.440 the whole thing, and I was able to pick this 0:15:36.480 --> 0:15:39.480 thing up. I put it in and right now you 0:15:39.520 --> 0:15:41.760 can't see this because we're on a podcast, but right 0:15:41.760 --> 0:15:44.560 behind me in the hallway outside I call it Studio B, 0:15:45.320 --> 0:15:48.040 which is the Mallard studio at the Mallard mansion. Right 0:15:48.080 --> 0:15:55.040 outside is that laundry matt grade rolling clothing cart, which 0:15:55.080 --> 0:15:57.440 I have saved and will be used. I actually wanted 0:15:57.480 --> 0:15:59.440 to buy one of these things. Guests gone, I was. 0:15:59.520 --> 0:16:01.840 I told my wife the laundry is a pain in 0:16:01.880 --> 0:16:04.040 the ass for everyone. Nobody liked doing laundry, So I 0:16:04.080 --> 0:16:05.640 was like, why don't we get one of those cards 0:16:05.680 --> 0:16:08.040 that will make it a lot easier. And we never 0:16:08.160 --> 0:16:12.720 did but it just fell into my lap. It's it's great. 0:16:13.080 --> 0:16:15.840 I'm happy with this. I'm so excited. Who knew that 0:16:15.880 --> 0:16:17.360 I would be excited. I never thought when I was 0:16:17.360 --> 0:16:19.520 a little kid that I would be excited as a 0:16:19.520 --> 0:16:21.880 middle aged man to get a laundry cart for free. 0:16:22.040 --> 0:16:24.320 And this thing is like a four dollar laundry cart. 0:16:24.600 --> 0:16:26.760 It's not just like a you know, a piece of 0:16:26.800 --> 0:16:28.800 crap that you bought, you know, at the discount, or 0:16:28.880 --> 0:16:31.040 this is a I'm telling you, it's top notch here 0:16:31.800 --> 0:16:34.960 and in any other year, I'd be appalled by this story. 0:16:35.000 --> 0:16:37.320 But it's and we gotta look at some of the 0:16:37.360 --> 0:16:40.200 smaller things in life. Well, I'm not I'm not west 0:16:40.240 --> 0:16:41.840 of the four or five guest Scouts, So I I 0:16:42.200 --> 0:16:43.920 if I was west of the four or five, I 0:16:44.000 --> 0:16:46.120 just go buy a laundry cart. But I'm a struggling 0:16:46.160 --> 0:16:49.160 overnight radio guy that took a pay cut this year 0:16:49.200 --> 0:16:54.200 because of the COVID. So yeah, there's there's nothing struggling 0:16:54.240 --> 0:16:56.920 about Ben Mallory and the Mallard mansion. I don't know 0:16:56.920 --> 0:16:58.640 what you're talking about. Man, you haven't been out here 0:16:58.640 --> 0:17:01.320 in a long time. We serve cold chicken. According to you, 0:17:01.360 --> 0:17:04.080 because we do. We can't afford warm chicken, cold chicken, 0:17:04.359 --> 0:17:09.600 and and burnt steak or frozen steak. Yes, Um, that 0:17:09.800 --> 0:17:14.119 that steak is sitting comfortably. That's say, what's gonna come first? 0:17:14.320 --> 0:17:16.960 Me eating the steak or Ted Williams head coming back 0:17:16.960 --> 0:17:19.960 to life. I think it's more likely that you'll pop 0:17:19.960 --> 0:17:22.359 into the studio before that good steak is. Actually I 0:17:22.400 --> 0:17:23.919 am gonna come to the studio this week. I have 0:17:23.920 --> 0:17:26.399 to pick up some mail. So people have alerted me 0:17:26.680 --> 0:17:29.199 that we have mail, so I need to pick up 0:17:29.240 --> 0:17:31.520 the mail. When I say we, it's mostly me that 0:17:31.760 --> 0:17:34.919 is a hey, I'm worried, guest. Am I gonna end 0:17:35.000 --> 0:17:37.359 up on? Did you ever run it by your wife 0:17:37.359 --> 0:17:39.439 that you can bring that cart back back to the 0:17:39.480 --> 0:17:41.760 house or did you just show up with it? And 0:17:42.119 --> 0:17:44.119 she was like I told her, I said I got something, 0:17:44.160 --> 0:17:49.040 I found something, you know. Uh yeah, Now she's cool 0:17:49.040 --> 0:17:51.280 with it. She doesn't you know, she doesn't mind actually say, 0:17:51.359 --> 0:17:54.320 I think she thinks it's funny. Um, but no, I'm 0:17:54.320 --> 0:17:56.920 always listen. If you can repurpose, one man's trash is 0:17:56.960 --> 0:17:59.720 another man's treasure. It's like a modern day storage war, 0:17:59.840 --> 0:18:03.600 right the show? Um? Yes, Anonymous like thirty minutes segments 0:18:03.600 --> 0:18:05.760 of storage wars where people go in these storage centers 0:18:05.800 --> 0:18:08.639 and they bid on ship and the storage and you 0:18:08.680 --> 0:18:12.639 find that one, like you said, Diamond and the rough. Yeah, yeah, no, no, 0:18:12.720 --> 0:18:15.520 it's it's going. I didn't go out looking for it. 0:18:15.560 --> 0:18:17.320 I don't go out looking for this ship. But if 0:18:17.320 --> 0:18:20.760 I find it, I'm like, hey, I I and I'm 0:18:20.800 --> 0:18:24.639 not kidding. I did want to get a professional laundry 0:18:24.680 --> 0:18:28.359 Mark Laundry Matt cart I wanted that. And this thing 0:18:28.440 --> 0:18:31.159 is in really good condition. It's like I was like 0:18:31.240 --> 0:18:32.800 when I went up to it, I was like skeptical. 0:18:32.800 --> 0:18:34.360 I'm like, all right, this thing must be there's something 0:18:34.400 --> 0:18:36.240 wrong with it. Doesn't look like there's anything wrong with it, 0:18:36.280 --> 0:18:38.960 but there's something must be wrong with it. What is it? 0:18:39.800 --> 0:18:42.040 And I, you know, I rolled it, I put there 0:18:42.080 --> 0:18:44.200 was some trash in it. I took the trash out 0:18:44.240 --> 0:18:47.080 and I rolled it around and it was fine. So 0:18:47.119 --> 0:18:49.199 I was like, all right, let take that. Since you 0:18:49.240 --> 0:18:53.359 and your wife talk about Christmas gifts up front before 0:18:53.359 --> 0:18:57.600 you purchase some, yeah, you should request a go go 0:18:57.760 --> 0:19:02.119 pro for you. Just let a Certain stories that you 0:19:02.240 --> 0:19:07.920 talk about nowadays are just marvelous. Thank you, I'm glad 0:19:07.920 --> 0:19:11.320 you appreciate my bath the bathroom debacle at the park. 0:19:12.440 --> 0:19:16.920 I should have taken a picture of the damage, the carnage. Yes, 0:19:17.440 --> 0:19:22.200 the I I was even shocked that my ass could 0:19:22.240 --> 0:19:25.919 have produced that much ship all over the toilet. I 0:19:25.960 --> 0:19:29.440 am still amazed by that that one human being could 0:19:29.480 --> 0:19:33.040 have that much. That is, the whole side of the 0:19:33.080 --> 0:19:37.040 bathroom walls were covered. It looked like I had painted 0:19:37.080 --> 0:19:43.040 the walls brown. It was unbelievable. Yes, the bathroom mistake 0:19:43.280 --> 0:19:47.000 here at Fox, that was. That was unfortunate when I 0:19:47.080 --> 0:19:49.160 had to do the show Commando. And my favorite part 0:19:49.160 --> 0:19:50.800 of that is that none of the people I work 0:19:50.880 --> 0:19:53.800 with and even noticed anything different that I was able 0:19:53.800 --> 0:19:56.359 to pull it off even though I had just shat 0:19:56.440 --> 0:19:59.920 myself five minutes before the show, or ten minutes before 0:19:59.920 --> 0:20:04.840 the show, waddling into the studio. Yes, good, go pro 0:20:05.000 --> 0:20:10.000 with you on the weekends. To be pretty good? All right? 0:20:10.000 --> 0:20:12.199 What else I have? Alban and the Chipmunk? Sorry, this 0:20:12.240 --> 0:20:14.119 is good. This is another classic story. I said, I 0:20:14.200 --> 0:20:16.520 try to save these things because Eddie doesn't appreciate them. 0:20:16.560 --> 0:20:18.679 You know, I don't think ed he appreciates these stories. 0:20:18.720 --> 0:20:22.960 You you on the podcast appreciate her. So so my 0:20:23.000 --> 0:20:25.760 wife's I've said before, she's like a bit of a hippie, 0:20:26.160 --> 0:20:29.399 bit of a hippie, and she's also like Mary Popping. 0:20:29.480 --> 0:20:32.040 She's always got lots of bags of crap that she 0:20:32.160 --> 0:20:34.000 carries with her. I was I call I call her 0:20:34.040 --> 0:20:36.719 like Mary Poppas because she's always got like, whatever you need, 0:20:36.840 --> 0:20:38.760 she'll have in one of her bags. You know, she 0:20:38.800 --> 0:20:42.120 has like the bag of potions. Right, yeah, exactly, exactly exactly, 0:20:42.160 --> 0:20:46.479 so so manywait, she's she's to use a word that 0:20:46.680 --> 0:20:50.240 Andy Furman would appreciate. From yesterday, she's into a lot 0:20:50.280 --> 0:20:53.320 of Michigas, alright, a lot of Michigan And now her 0:20:53.400 --> 0:20:57.040 latest thing is she's decided that she's into horticulture, and 0:20:57.119 --> 0:21:01.240 her idea to fix the planet is a you know 0:21:01.280 --> 0:21:03.280 what it is, guests gon take gi guests, I don't 0:21:03.320 --> 0:21:07.760 even they want to guess. It is to put a 0:21:07.800 --> 0:21:12.960 compost bin in the front yard, right compost. Bit. So, 0:21:13.119 --> 0:21:15.680 from from now on, she just started this a week ago, 0:21:15.920 --> 0:21:19.040 all of the vegetable and the organic food waste are 0:21:19.080 --> 0:21:22.119 going to be tossed into this kind of like basket 0:21:22.160 --> 0:21:26.640 thing and turned into soil for the garden. Right, So 0:21:26.680 --> 0:21:28.840 she's now found her green thumb. Now, I wanted to 0:21:28.920 --> 0:21:32.320 tell you when she made the announcement to me that 0:21:32.359 --> 0:21:35.040 this is what she was gonna do, I, of course, 0:21:35.040 --> 0:21:39.080 as a pessimist, informed her that this was a bad idea, right, 0:21:39.200 --> 0:21:43.920 I said, listen, it is going to attract all kinds 0:21:44.040 --> 0:21:47.679 of critters and varmints, right, what are you doing? Uh? 0:21:47.720 --> 0:21:50.919 And they're gonna be rats there and rodents and all this, 0:21:51.160 --> 0:21:54.359 you know, And do we need to encourage them that? 0:21:55.160 --> 0:21:58.600 You know, it's the the saloon is open for business here, 0:21:58.680 --> 0:22:00.679 you know, or the restaurant. It's an all you can 0:22:00.720 --> 0:22:04.520 eat buffet of food for the rats and the little critters. 0:22:05.000 --> 0:22:08.000 She assured me it would be fine. So we're like 0:22:08.040 --> 0:22:13.280