1 00:00:01,080 --> 00:00:04,080 Speaker 1: All right, guys, time now for today's Strawberry Letter and listen. 2 00:00:04,120 --> 00:00:08,080 Speaker 1: If you need advice on sex, on dating, on parenting, 3 00:00:08,160 --> 00:00:11,719 Speaker 1: on work, and more, please submit your Strawberry Letter to 4 00:00:11,720 --> 00:00:14,640 Speaker 1: Steve Harvey FM and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could 5 00:00:14,680 --> 00:00:17,280 Speaker 1: be reading your letter live on the air, just like 6 00:00:17,280 --> 00:00:21,560 Speaker 1: we're gonna read this one right here, right now. Pop, Pop, 7 00:00:22,040 --> 00:00:25,200 Speaker 1: there you go, Jay, buggle up, hold on tight, We 8 00:00:25,280 --> 00:00:27,720 Speaker 1: got it for you here. It is the Strawberry Letter. 9 00:00:27,840 --> 00:00:30,240 Speaker 1: All right, I'm gonna tell you just off the top, Temmy, 10 00:00:30,280 --> 00:00:34,120 Speaker 1: you're not gonna like this letter, Okay. Subject he stinks 11 00:00:34,520 --> 00:00:38,400 Speaker 1: and I'm shamed. Just Stephen Shirley, I'm a middle aged 12 00:00:38,440 --> 00:00:41,400 Speaker 1: woman and I've been married for over a decade. I 13 00:00:41,520 --> 00:00:46,160 Speaker 1: worked two full time jobs, averaging sixteen to eighteen hours 14 00:00:46,200 --> 00:00:49,440 Speaker 1: a day, usually six days a week. My husband has 15 00:00:49,479 --> 00:00:52,159 Speaker 1: his own business and rarely works a ten hour day 16 00:00:52,240 --> 00:00:57,080 Speaker 1: and has consistent days and weeks off during his downtime. 17 00:00:57,400 --> 00:01:00,680 Speaker 1: He finds the time and energy to help ends outside 18 00:01:00,680 --> 00:01:02,680 Speaker 1: of our home, but can't seem to find the time 19 00:01:02,680 --> 00:01:05,280 Speaker 1: to help clean our bathroom or wash his clothes. I'm 20 00:01:05,319 --> 00:01:07,160 Speaker 1: at the point where I wash my own clothes and 21 00:01:07,240 --> 00:01:10,400 Speaker 1: I let his pile up. Instead of washing his clothes, 22 00:01:10,440 --> 00:01:13,119 Speaker 1: he goes out and buys new clothes. If then, when 23 00:01:13,160 --> 00:01:16,160 Speaker 1: he runs out of underwear or he needs a clean 24 00:01:16,240 --> 00:01:19,200 Speaker 1: shirt for a meeting, I'm shamed to say my husband 25 00:01:19,319 --> 00:01:22,640 Speaker 1: smells bad. He takes the clothes he's worked in all 26 00:01:22,760 --> 00:01:25,200 Speaker 1: day and will lay them over the chair in our 27 00:01:25,240 --> 00:01:27,880 Speaker 1: bedroom or stack them in the closet, and he goes 28 00:01:27,920 --> 00:01:30,399 Speaker 1: to one of the piles daily to smell the shirts 29 00:01:30,480 --> 00:01:32,479 Speaker 1: or pants to see if he can wear it one 30 00:01:32,520 --> 00:01:35,679 Speaker 1: more time. If for sure to stain, he will get 31 00:01:35,720 --> 00:01:38,640 Speaker 1: a wet washcloth and spot clean it so he can 32 00:01:38,680 --> 00:01:41,840 Speaker 1: wear it. He smells like old cologne over dirty jeans 33 00:01:41,920 --> 00:01:45,000 Speaker 1: most of the time. I have told him continuously that 34 00:01:45,120 --> 00:01:47,720 Speaker 1: I am not his mate, and I have no energy 35 00:01:47,840 --> 00:01:51,480 Speaker 1: to do his laundry and mine. He is a representative 36 00:01:51,520 --> 00:01:53,800 Speaker 1: of meat when he walks out of our home, and 37 00:01:53,840 --> 00:01:56,720 Speaker 1: when people see him in dirty clothes and he's smelling bad, 38 00:01:56,800 --> 00:02:00,200 Speaker 1: it's a reflection on me. Don't get me wrong. He 39 00:02:00,240 --> 00:02:03,200 Speaker 1: showers and puts on clean underwear because he buys new 40 00:02:03,280 --> 00:02:06,760 Speaker 1: underwear instead of washing his And I've thought about talking 41 00:02:07,160 --> 00:02:09,720 Speaker 1: taking everything to the cleaners and then handing him the 42 00:02:09,760 --> 00:02:11,960 Speaker 1: receipt to pick it all up. But why should I 43 00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:14,160 Speaker 1: have to do that? What can I do to get 44 00:02:14,240 --> 00:02:18,640 Speaker 1: him to wash? How can he be comfortable with this? Wow? 45 00:02:18,720 --> 00:02:22,760 Speaker 1: How can he be comfortable with any of this? This 46 00:02:23,320 --> 00:02:27,080 Speaker 1: is really nasty? And as a grown man, he's lazy 47 00:02:27,120 --> 00:02:29,359 Speaker 1: and he knows better, he knows he should be washing 48 00:02:29,400 --> 00:02:31,680 Speaker 1: his clothes. Even if he doesn't want to be clean 49 00:02:31,760 --> 00:02:34,400 Speaker 1: for himself, he still has you as his wife, who 50 00:02:34,760 --> 00:02:38,120 Speaker 1: certainly doesn't want to be smelling him like that. I 51 00:02:38,120 --> 00:02:42,360 Speaker 1: don't think anyone does. And what about intimacy. You didn't 52 00:02:42,400 --> 00:02:46,000 Speaker 1: discuss that in the letter, but has that come on? Now? 53 00:02:46,639 --> 00:02:50,480 Speaker 1: How does that work? That? Right? There should be a 54 00:02:50,520 --> 00:02:54,400 Speaker 1: deal breaker? End of story. None of this makes sense. 55 00:02:54,560 --> 00:02:57,360 Speaker 1: And I say to you, don't blame yourself. He knows, 56 00:02:57,400 --> 00:02:59,400 Speaker 1: he stinks. He's got to know that, you know what, 57 00:02:59,480 --> 00:03:01,920 Speaker 1: He's got to know it before you do. But I 58 00:03:02,040 --> 00:03:04,840 Speaker 1: just think the bigger problem here is your marriage overall. 59 00:03:05,600 --> 00:03:08,600 Speaker 1: What's going on with that? I mean, you guys seem 60 00:03:08,680 --> 00:03:12,040 Speaker 1: far apart. I mean you're working two full time jobs, 61 00:03:12,080 --> 00:03:14,760 Speaker 1: six days a week, sixteen to eighteen hours a day. 62 00:03:14,919 --> 00:03:18,000 Speaker 1: When do you have time for yourself or your marriage? 63 00:03:18,040 --> 00:03:20,720 Speaker 1: When do you even have time to do your own laundry. 64 00:03:20,760 --> 00:03:23,200 Speaker 1: Since you say you do it. I don't know. I 65 00:03:23,240 --> 00:03:26,880 Speaker 1: think you guys are working too hard. You anyway, he's 66 00:03:26,919 --> 00:03:31,600 Speaker 1: not working enough, but he is helping other people. The 67 00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:35,080 Speaker 1: stress of that could be the culprit. I mean, you've 68 00:03:35,120 --> 00:03:38,280 Speaker 1: got stressed because you work too much and you're frustrated 69 00:03:38,360 --> 00:03:41,400 Speaker 1: with him, and then he's probably frustrated too because he 70 00:03:41,480 --> 00:03:45,040 Speaker 1: never sees you or whatever. So I suggest cutting back, 71 00:03:45,160 --> 00:03:50,000 Speaker 1: changing your workload if you can. You know, you guys 72 00:03:50,080 --> 00:03:52,400 Speaker 1: need to talk and get or get some counseling or 73 00:03:52,440 --> 00:03:54,560 Speaker 1: something to find out the real problem in your marriage, 74 00:03:54,560 --> 00:03:58,120 Speaker 1: because there is a problem here. And in the meantime 75 00:03:58,520 --> 00:04:02,280 Speaker 1: most definitely can stinky close to the cleaners. At least 76 00:04:02,320 --> 00:04:07,800 Speaker 1: you can do that. Steve Well, I have some solutions 77 00:04:07,840 --> 00:04:11,120 Speaker 1: for this woman. How much time do I have because 78 00:04:11,120 --> 00:04:14,760 Speaker 1: I don't want to go too deepak, I got a 79 00:04:14,760 --> 00:04:16,800 Speaker 1: little bit, so let me just start right here. The 80 00:04:16,880 --> 00:04:23,080 Speaker 1: subject is he stinks and I'm ashamed. The problem with 81 00:04:23,240 --> 00:04:30,839 Speaker 1: this letter is see you ashamed. See until until he 82 00:04:31,160 --> 00:04:36,960 Speaker 1: is ashamed, the problem will continue. So with that in mind, 83 00:04:37,000 --> 00:04:39,479 Speaker 1: I've taken into the account that you work two four 84 00:04:39,640 --> 00:04:43,480 Speaker 1: jobs sixteen eighteen hours a day, six days a week. 85 00:04:44,160 --> 00:04:47,159 Speaker 1: The husband rarely puts in more than ten hours a day. 86 00:04:47,279 --> 00:04:49,600 Speaker 1: He's got some weeks off in some weekends because he 87 00:04:49,680 --> 00:04:53,279 Speaker 1: owned his own business. But here's the beginning of the problem. 88 00:04:53,480 --> 00:04:57,480 Speaker 1: During his down time, he finds a time and energy 89 00:04:57,520 --> 00:05:01,120 Speaker 1: to help friends outside our home, but king seem to 90 00:05:01,200 --> 00:05:04,360 Speaker 1: find it help to clean our bathroom and wash his clothes. Now, 91 00:05:04,440 --> 00:05:10,960 Speaker 1: right there, that's problem number one, because he's out there 92 00:05:11,080 --> 00:05:17,880 Speaker 1: helping all these people wearing his ass out. No, he 93 00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:20,520 Speaker 1: might not be putting in ten hour days and all 94 00:05:20,600 --> 00:05:24,680 Speaker 1: this here at on his job in his business, but 95 00:05:24,760 --> 00:05:26,760 Speaker 1: he putting in a lot of time with all this 96 00:05:26,960 --> 00:05:29,960 Speaker 1: helping all these other damn people, and your husband then 97 00:05:30,120 --> 00:05:33,320 Speaker 1: wore his little tired ass out. Now you're at the 98 00:05:33,360 --> 00:05:35,880 Speaker 1: point where you're washing your own clothes and you let 99 00:05:36,000 --> 00:05:39,880 Speaker 1: his pile up. Right, But instead of watching his clothes, 100 00:05:40,080 --> 00:05:42,800 Speaker 1: he go out and buy new clothes when and if 101 00:05:42,800 --> 00:05:45,159 Speaker 1: he run out of underwear he needs a clean shirt 102 00:05:45,240 --> 00:05:49,200 Speaker 1: for a meeting. I'm ashamed to say my husband smell bad. 103 00:05:49,240 --> 00:05:51,400 Speaker 1: But now later on in the letter you say he 104 00:05:51,480 --> 00:05:56,920 Speaker 1: does take showers, but that shirt stake though, because see 105 00:05:56,960 --> 00:05:58,760 Speaker 1: you ain't say what kind of help he doing here 106 00:05:58,760 --> 00:06:02,440 Speaker 1: out there doing yard work. He had that rearranging garages. 107 00:06:02,680 --> 00:06:06,240 Speaker 1: He had that, dropping transmissions and changing all You're gonna 108 00:06:06,279 --> 00:06:09,320 Speaker 1: get funking doing all it cuttn't grass all up in 109 00:06:09,400 --> 00:06:13,479 Speaker 1: Miss post seals or tree pruning? It fine, all Miss 110 00:06:13,560 --> 00:06:17,760 Speaker 1: par sal The ladies stay cross Street, okay. And he 111 00:06:17,839 --> 00:06:23,560 Speaker 1: over that doing all gardening and working the sand, blasting 112 00:06:23,680 --> 00:06:29,360 Speaker 1: houses and sand for people, taking Miss Chris Shawn garbage out. 113 00:06:29,480 --> 00:06:31,760 Speaker 1: You know all is it washing out trash cans for 114 00:06:31,880 --> 00:06:39,760 Speaker 1: People's so healthful. He just a little elf on his hands. 115 00:06:40,800 --> 00:06:43,839 Speaker 1: So when we come back, I have a solution. All right, 116 00:06:43,880 --> 00:06:46,120 Speaker 1: We'll have part two of Steve's response coming up at 117 00:06:46,120 --> 00:06:49,039 Speaker 1: twenty three minutes after the hours subject he stinks and 118 00:06:49,080 --> 00:06:53,120 Speaker 1: I'm ashamed. We'll be back right after this. You're listening 119 00:06:53,839 --> 00:06:57,000 Speaker 1: Steve Harvey Morning Show. All right, come on, Steve, let's 120 00:06:57,000 --> 00:07:01,960 Speaker 1: recap today's strawberry letter. The sub stinks and I'm ashamed. 121 00:07:02,520 --> 00:07:06,160 Speaker 1: Well it's man right here. She's married to working part time. 122 00:07:06,240 --> 00:07:08,440 Speaker 1: He got a business and she's working full time. And 123 00:07:08,640 --> 00:07:11,200 Speaker 1: he ain't cleaning up at the house. He ain't washing 124 00:07:11,240 --> 00:07:14,360 Speaker 1: no clothes or nothing. He getting nasty in there. When 125 00:07:14,400 --> 00:07:17,680 Speaker 1: he run out of clothes. He buying draws instead of 126 00:07:17,920 --> 00:07:20,760 Speaker 1: washing them, and and you know, he reaching over smelling 127 00:07:20,840 --> 00:07:23,440 Speaker 1: shirts and he put her and she just stinks and 128 00:07:23,560 --> 00:07:28,640 Speaker 1: she's ashamed. Now she is ashamed. So now we have 129 00:07:28,760 --> 00:07:32,160 Speaker 1: to deal with this. And so I have a couple 130 00:07:32,200 --> 00:07:39,840 Speaker 1: of solutions for this woman's problem. See, I know he 131 00:07:39,960 --> 00:07:42,360 Speaker 1: buying all these things and all this hip, but when 132 00:07:42,360 --> 00:07:45,680 Speaker 1: he puts these shirts on, then he's been smelling. He 133 00:07:45,840 --> 00:07:50,280 Speaker 1: seems to not notice the smell. So I want to 134 00:07:50,360 --> 00:07:54,000 Speaker 1: offer this solution to you. I think the first thing 135 00:07:54,040 --> 00:07:56,480 Speaker 1: you need to do is get him a COVID test, 136 00:07:57,360 --> 00:08:00,600 Speaker 1: because it's quite possible that he has lost the smell 137 00:08:00,760 --> 00:08:05,040 Speaker 1: and taste and he just operating in COVID and y'all 138 00:08:05,040 --> 00:08:07,000 Speaker 1: didn't get out here and get the damn COVID test 139 00:08:07,280 --> 00:08:11,600 Speaker 1: for this lead to a stronger problem. Who if he 140 00:08:11,680 --> 00:08:15,320 Speaker 1: had lost his taste smell and taste, he don't know 141 00:08:15,400 --> 00:08:18,520 Speaker 1: these shirts is funking, and that leads to a whole 142 00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:25,920 Speaker 1: another situation. So that's for starter. We need a COVID test. 143 00:08:26,320 --> 00:08:30,000 Speaker 1: Now check here's the other thing I think you need 144 00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:34,200 Speaker 1: to start doing. First of all, the left type of 145 00:08:34,360 --> 00:08:38,920 Speaker 1: the letter is he stinks and I'm ashamed. That's another 146 00:08:39,040 --> 00:08:41,400 Speaker 1: part of the problem. See you a shame, He's not 147 00:08:41,440 --> 00:08:44,360 Speaker 1: a shame. So I have two solutions for this. First 148 00:08:44,400 --> 00:08:49,400 Speaker 1: of all, whtting them close, pile up, and he may 149 00:08:49,480 --> 00:08:55,080 Speaker 1: have COVID and don't know it. My strong suggestion is 150 00:08:55,160 --> 00:08:59,400 Speaker 1: you start burning the clothes that he laying over the chair, 151 00:09:00,120 --> 00:09:03,000 Speaker 1: take them in the bathroom, put them in the bathtub, 152 00:09:03,360 --> 00:09:07,800 Speaker 1: and set all them clothes on fire to take them 153 00:09:07,800 --> 00:09:11,000 Speaker 1: to the cleaners. Well, but now see, I've been homeless before. 154 00:09:11,080 --> 00:09:13,240 Speaker 1: I had some draws on one time that I had 155 00:09:13,280 --> 00:09:20,880 Speaker 1: to burn. I'm speaking from experience when I was hard. 156 00:09:20,960 --> 00:09:22,960 Speaker 1: I didn't think you were gonna say that I had 157 00:09:23,160 --> 00:09:26,080 Speaker 1: had draws on one time, and when I finally got 158 00:09:26,080 --> 00:09:28,560 Speaker 1: to a gas station, took them off. I left him 159 00:09:28,600 --> 00:09:33,840 Speaker 1: in there no need or me putting knees in the 160 00:09:33,920 --> 00:09:38,280 Speaker 1: car and rolling the windows out in this heat because 161 00:09:38,320 --> 00:09:40,480 Speaker 1: I got some food in my cool and I didn't 162 00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:43,600 Speaker 1: want to saw the full I've had to leave some 163 00:09:43,760 --> 00:09:47,360 Speaker 1: drawls out of gas station. So anybody that has got 164 00:09:47,520 --> 00:09:52,120 Speaker 1: up Sonoco station down in Tennessee, there was my draws. 165 00:09:52,360 --> 00:09:57,920 Speaker 1: I apologized. I know somebody's eyelashes and my brows fell 166 00:09:57,960 --> 00:10:00,560 Speaker 1: off when they opened that dope and didn't know what 167 00:10:00,640 --> 00:10:06,760 Speaker 1: it was. I won't apologize, it's just you know, but 168 00:10:06,920 --> 00:10:09,800 Speaker 1: you know, the uh, you know what the seven years 169 00:10:09,840 --> 00:10:14,040 Speaker 1: of you know has passed, you know, and what they 170 00:10:14,080 --> 00:10:17,600 Speaker 1: call that statue limitation, so I can't get charged. But 171 00:10:17,640 --> 00:10:20,960 Speaker 1: then with my drawls in that gas station in Tennessee, 172 00:10:21,240 --> 00:10:26,240 Speaker 1: I apologize, but I just couldn't stupid, so I wanted 173 00:10:26,320 --> 00:10:28,600 Speaker 1: I wanted you to know that. And and I you know, 174 00:10:28,640 --> 00:10:30,800 Speaker 1: I've never been a fan of white drawls anyway, but 175 00:10:32,120 --> 00:10:36,440 Speaker 1: dim drawls I just couldn't. I couldn't bring myself to 176 00:10:36,559 --> 00:10:40,200 Speaker 1: even pick them up by my fingertips I left from 177 00:10:40,200 --> 00:10:44,080 Speaker 1: in the flow of that gas station, and you know, 178 00:10:44,520 --> 00:10:47,199 Speaker 1: the smell of gass or nothing could get rid of it. 179 00:10:47,760 --> 00:10:50,720 Speaker 1: So I know how you feel. So I suggested burn 180 00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:56,080 Speaker 1: them because I've had the burnoo. Now here's the next 181 00:10:56,120 --> 00:10:58,680 Speaker 1: thing I think you need to do. He stinks and 182 00:10:58,760 --> 00:11:01,600 Speaker 1: I'm ashamed. Here's what you have to do. You have 183 00:11:01,679 --> 00:11:04,800 Speaker 1: to start shaming him. This is what I want you 184 00:11:04,840 --> 00:11:10,559 Speaker 1: to do. I want you to get a fake account Instagram, 185 00:11:10,800 --> 00:11:15,640 Speaker 1: Facebook account and go on his page and start commenting 186 00:11:15,960 --> 00:11:23,960 Speaker 1: on how bad he's stinking, what the needs to get 187 00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:30,200 Speaker 1: a fake account and go on his Facebook and Instagram 188 00:11:30,240 --> 00:11:35,160 Speaker 1: and start posting comments like like little stuff like this 189 00:11:35,840 --> 00:11:39,800 Speaker 1: like hold you know, like have you a cute handle? 190 00:11:39,880 --> 00:11:42,920 Speaker 1: Like I gotta truth be told? Or hold you to it, 191 00:11:43,000 --> 00:11:46,400 Speaker 1: you know, or catch your name like that at hold 192 00:11:46,480 --> 00:11:48,920 Speaker 1: you to it, or or I can't take no more 193 00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:52,600 Speaker 1: dot com or something like that, and just start posting 194 00:11:52,960 --> 00:11:57,880 Speaker 1: information on that like who the heir whose shirt was 195 00:11:57,920 --> 00:12:01,360 Speaker 1: that you had on? I just start putting stuff like 196 00:12:01,400 --> 00:12:04,079 Speaker 1: that because you can't be the only one in shame, 197 00:12:04,640 --> 00:12:06,880 Speaker 1: and you can do this and you could get several 198 00:12:06,920 --> 00:12:10,079 Speaker 1: accounts so to sound like because a lot of people complaining, 199 00:12:10,440 --> 00:12:12,120 Speaker 1: and you know, make it sound like there's some people 200 00:12:12,160 --> 00:12:14,360 Speaker 1: that he's been helping, you know, like his name is 201 00:12:14,360 --> 00:12:20,760 Speaker 1: probably like Hallow. This is probably Hallow that dear Hollow, 202 00:12:21,800 --> 00:12:25,040 Speaker 1: I appreciate you helping me with the trash, but you 203 00:12:25,200 --> 00:12:29,120 Speaker 1: left something with me that was felt like you didn't 204 00:12:29,160 --> 00:12:32,800 Speaker 1: help me with the trash. And then just you know, 205 00:12:32,880 --> 00:12:35,880 Speaker 1: just leave it alone. There's stuff like you know, like 206 00:12:36,400 --> 00:12:39,319 Speaker 1: dear Hallow, appreci appreciate you climbing up in the tree, 207 00:12:39,400 --> 00:12:45,440 Speaker 1: but Jesus when you climb down, because you got to 208 00:12:45,520 --> 00:12:49,319 Speaker 1: find a way to shame him and that's the beginning 209 00:12:49,360 --> 00:12:52,920 Speaker 1: of all your problems. So uh so you say what 210 00:12:53,000 --> 00:12:55,200 Speaker 1: can I do to get him to wash? And that's 211 00:12:55,240 --> 00:12:57,480 Speaker 1: how you do it. You gotta have somebody else being 212 00:12:57,559 --> 00:13:01,840 Speaker 1: shamed other than yourself. Thank you for as all right, 213 00:13:01,920 --> 00:13:04,880 Speaker 1: post your comments on today's Strawberry Letard Steve Harvey FM 214 00:13:04,920 --> 00:13:08,480 Speaker 1: on Instagram and Facebook, coming up with forty six minutes 215 00:13:08,520 --> 00:13:12,040 Speaker 1: after Junior and sports talk right after this. Alright, Steve, 216 00:13:12,880 --> 00:13:15,600 Speaker 1: you're listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show.