Speaker 1: Cool Zone Media.
Speaker 2: Book Club book Club book Club. Welcome to cool Z
Speaker 2: Owned Media book Club. That's the best introduction we've ever done.
Speaker 3: Thank you. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Club bars on the floor, but we stepped over.
Speaker 3: I practiced for weeks. We've had to cancel three other shows,
Speaker 3: but I got it. I got it now.
Speaker 2: The people that you live with have been really appreciative.
Speaker 2: They've all messaged me to.
Speaker 3: Let me Knowah, they love the chanting Yeah, huge chanting fans.
Speaker 2: And the chanting show that you're listening to is cool
Speaker 2: Zone Media book Club, which you probably figured out by
Speaker 2: the title or the other part of the introduction. But
Speaker 2: this is the only book club where you don't have
Speaker 2: to do the reading because I do it for you.
Speaker 2: I'm your host, Margaret Kiljoy, and my guest today is
Speaker 2: Robert Robert Evans.
Speaker 3: Hi, that's me.
Speaker 2: You always made this joke about how you were the
Speaker 2: only Robert Evans, and it took me about three years
Speaker 2: to get the joke.
Speaker 3: Yeah, well it was. It made more since years ago
Speaker 3: when the guy who produced Godfather was still alive and
Speaker 3: in the news. Yeah, and I changed my online name
Speaker 3: to that the day he died as a bit and
Speaker 3: just haven't moved on. Yeah, fair enough, because I used
Speaker 3: to be the other Robert Evans, right.
Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, well you're always the greater Robert Evans to.
Speaker 3: Me, thank you, thank you. I'm certainly the Robert Evans
Speaker 3: who has done less cocaine, because no matter who you are,
Speaker 3: you've done less cocaine than the Robert Evans who made
Speaker 3: The Godfather.
Speaker 2: We're going to have to actually invent immortality in order
Speaker 2: to be that record.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't care for literally scarface.
Speaker 2: So this week and last week and the next several weeks,
Speaker 2: we are reading The Barrel Will Send What It May,
Speaker 2: which is the second book in the Danielle Kaine series.
Speaker 2: And if you want to go back, you can hear
Speaker 2: me read the first book in the series to Robert
Speaker 2: Evans a couple of years ago. But you can probably
Speaker 2: use a certain function instead of scrolling yep, and you
Speaker 2: will find me read the book The Lamb Will Slaughter
Speaker 2: the Lion. But this book, well it's chapter two, so
Speaker 2: you probably know what's happening, or you don't because you
Speaker 2: live a very different life than me, and you start
Speaker 2: on chapter two.
Speaker 3: Yeah, maybe you're one of those second chapter people at
Speaker 3: book talk who believe you should always start with chapter two.
Speaker 3: Is that this no, but they it might be. It
Speaker 3: is now, it is now. I did have My old.
Speaker 2: Art teacher was always like, it's okay to read the
Speaker 2: end of the book first, because you are the person
Speaker 2: that it is the object mm hm, and I like
Speaker 2: both appreciated that and was like, I will never do that.
Speaker 3: As a writer. I find that deeply off putting as
Speaker 3: a logical argument. I can't disagree with it.
Speaker 2: My friend always talks about I'm not going to spoil
Speaker 2: this book for the audience, But my friend always talks
Speaker 2: about how great spoilers are. Historically, there's like studies that
Speaker 2: show that spoilers actually make you enjoy something more. Oh yeah,
Speaker 2: and how during like ee oldie Shakespeare times, like when
Speaker 2: a new play would come out by anyone, people would
Speaker 2: like in the docks, like the boat would be coming
Speaker 2: in and they'd be like, what happens at the end
Speaker 2: of the new play? Them in a different culture's sure
Speaker 2: to do?
Speaker 3: We sure do.
Speaker 2: I was going to somehow tie that into this book
Speaker 2: also has the singular day, but because so did Shakespeare anyway,
Speaker 2: thine sure Section section two Jesus Christ, Chapter two of
Speaker 2: the Barrels send what it May, second book in the
Speaker 2: Daniel Kaine series by me Margaret Kiljoy. Staring out a
Speaker 2: window again at the low sun. I wasn't in my
Speaker 2: body but just above it? Or was I in the
Speaker 2: driver's seat again? I wasn't. I was in the passenger
Speaker 2: seat of a stranger's car. Not a stranger, Gertrude. Maybe
Speaker 2: I was concussed. What did the doctor ask me when
Speaker 2: I was a kid and I hit my head super
Speaker 2: hard on the playground? What year is it? What's my name?
Speaker 3: Count?
Speaker 2: Backward from one hundred by sevens one hundred ninety three.
Speaker 2: I should have just pulled over earlier, as soon as
Speaker 2: I'd been tired. Why hadn't I eighty six? It had
Speaker 2: felt good driving, I'd felt useful. No, it hadn't been
Speaker 2: for other people. Driving west away from Iowa. I'd felt
Speaker 2: in control of my own life and destiny. That's half
Speaker 2: of why I travel seventy nine. I hadn't felt in
Speaker 2: control for months. It wasn't the magic and demon's thing.
Speaker 2: It was Clay's death. He'd been such a I don't know,
Speaker 2: not a corner stone, a keystone. His existence somewhere in
Speaker 2: the world had been keeping me together. He was gone,
Speaker 2: and ever since, I hadn't felt like I was in control.
Speaker 2: Maybe it wasn't him specifically. Maybe I would have felt
Speaker 2: that way if any of my close friends had died.
Speaker 2: Did I have close friends anymore? Seventy two? Traveling with
Speaker 2: others is always a trade off. Being close with other
Speaker 2: people is always a trade off. Do we give up
Speaker 2: pieces of our autonomy to be with others? Is it
Speaker 2: worth it? Eighty five?
Speaker 3: No? No, that isn't right.
Speaker 2: Fifty five one number was I on? I couldn't be
Speaker 2: concussed for the simple reason that I didn't want to
Speaker 2: be and I wasn't sure that there was anything I
Speaker 2: could do about it. Even if I was, I probably
Speaker 2: couldn't count backward from one hundred by sevens. If I
Speaker 2: was fine, It was fine. I was fine. I could breathe, thankfully, blissfully.
Speaker 2: The sun made its way below the horizon and stopped,
Speaker 2: reminding me of that time I flipped a car and
Speaker 2: almost killed everyone. I even let myself doze off. But
Speaker 2: do you know what came to me in my dreams?
Speaker 3: Robert Evans a belief and an understanding that the only
Speaker 3: way to the Promised Land is through the products and
Speaker 3: services advertise next on this podcast.
Speaker 2: Whatever they are, that's right, we fully support this is
Speaker 2: your only way to Heaven, and we're back. It was
Speaker 2: about a three hour drive, and we discussed our plans
Speaker 2: as best we could in someone else's car. We'd try
Speaker 2: the library. If the folks there were as similar to
Speaker 2: us as Gertrude figured, then they'd put us up at
Speaker 2: least for the night. Anarchists stick together, well, except when
Speaker 2: we get mad at one another over small details. Also,
Speaker 2: I guess I kind of fed an anarchist to a
Speaker 2: deer a couple days ago, but that's besides the point.
Speaker 2: It was collective self defense. He was trying to get
Speaker 2: the deer to eat my friends. No matter. We'd try
Speaker 2: the library, then see what we could do about getting
Speaker 2: a new vehicle. Pendleton goes from rural road to downtown
Speaker 2: in less than a block, which is kind of impressive.
Speaker 2: Nothing nothing, pasture, nothing, trees, nothing, then a speed trap
Speaker 2: and a tourist trap right in a row. The latter
Speaker 2: even had a concrete tyrannosaurus out front. That kind of
Speaker 2: awesome place you don't see much of until you get
Speaker 2: to the parts of the country people write road trip
Speaker 2: movies about. Then a Western style tourist downtown, complete with
Speaker 2: boardwalk and old timey looking lampposts. This town has seen
Speaker 2: better days, I said, as we drove past a broken
Speaker 2: trunk of concrete fence that lined the boardwalk. Ain't no
Speaker 2: jobs now that the tourists are gone? Why are the
Speaker 2: tourists gone? Budget cuts? Gertrude said, I don't know the
Speaker 2: whole ways of it, but a lot of public land
Speaker 2: went private, and there's not so much outdoor recreation like
Speaker 2: there was. It was okay for a while, there was
Speaker 2: still work for the gas companies, but I guess this
Speaker 2: area wasn't so good after all. And all the jobs
Speaker 2: are a couple two more many hours east to hear,
Speaker 2: and no one young sticks around. That's a shame, I said,
Speaker 2: because it was everything ends. She said that's just God's way.
Speaker 2: I didn't believe much in God, but she wasn't wrong.
Speaker 2: People are staring, I said. We were stopped at a light,
Speaker 2: probably the only light in town, and an old white
Speaker 2: man was glaring from behind the curtains of some kind
Speaker 2: of knickknacks store. Oh they're not staring at you, Gertrude said.
Speaker 2: The light turned green and she turned left off the
Speaker 2: main drag. The town was only about three maybe four
Speaker 2: blocks wide, maybe ten blocks long, lots of small houses
Speaker 2: with forests and plains just beyond. People here ain't prejudiced,
Speaker 2: got nothing against black folks or even folks who dress
Speaker 2: like I don't know what you call that, punks, I asked.
Speaker 2: We weren't what most people think of when you think
Speaker 2: of punks. None of us had mohawks, and I don't
Speaker 2: think any of us besides maybe Thursday or Brynn, listened
Speaker 2: to the sex pistols, but we were punks. Sure? Yeah,
Speaker 2: what about trans people? Vulture asked. Gertrude looked up in
Speaker 2: the rear view, probably looking at Vulture to see if
Speaker 2: she could tell he was trans. Oh, honey, this is Montana,
Speaker 2: not North Dakota, she said. Does that mean a yes,
Speaker 2: Sarah no, Vulture asked. We read the news, we've seen
Speaker 2: people like you online, and people around here are willing
Speaker 2: to let people be people. That's cool, Vulture said. He
Speaker 2: didn't sound incredibly reassured, you know, Gertrude said, I never
Speaker 2: would have noticed you pass really well. So that's the
Speaker 2: kind of thing that probably sounds like it's going to
Speaker 2: be a compliment but turns out not to be Vulture said,
Speaker 2: have you had you know, I think the three of
Speaker 2: us tried to cut her off at once. Not a
Speaker 2: real polite topic of conversation, I said, got it. She
Speaker 2: genuinely seemed to take it well, but telling her not
Speaker 2: to ask the questions she so clearly wanted to ask
Speaker 2: still managed to kind of silence the car for a moment.
Speaker 2: So why are people staring, I asked at last, when
Speaker 2: we stopped at the stop sign. Folks have been staring
Speaker 2: at me ever since I came back back to town,
Speaker 2: back from the dead. She said it so casually, like
Speaker 2: it was something no one would raise an eyebrow at
Speaker 2: about that. I asked, you mean like they had to
Speaker 2: put those paddles on you and shock you back to
Speaker 2: life after a car accident or something. If that's not,
Speaker 2: I don't know. Also the kind of question that's rude
Speaker 2: to ask. No, No, it's okay. Gertrude turned right onto
Speaker 2: an unlit street. Maybe the library was this way, maybe
Speaker 2: something worse was happening. For the first time in the
Speaker 2: whole interaction, Hey, I may be slow, but I'd had
Speaker 2: a rough day. I was getting uneasy sitting on the
Speaker 2: edge of my seat, eyeing the law on the doors.
Speaker 2: I died of cancer last Christmas Eve. I was dead
Speaker 2: six months. God bring you back. I dealt with crazy
Speaker 2: folks all my life. It was fine, we'd be fine.
Speaker 2: I turned over my shoulder to see if my friends
Speaker 2: were paying attention. They were. Brin had her hand on
Speaker 2: her knife. Thursday had his hand in the kangaroo pocket
Speaker 2: of his hoodie, probably on his gun. Someone like that,
Speaker 2: Gertrude said. I had a feeling it wasn't God who'd
Speaker 2: told Gertrude to pick us up. After all, we'd asked
Speaker 2: for the dead to guard us. She stopped the car.
Speaker 2: It wasn't sudden, she'd been slowing down, but it caught
Speaker 2: me off guard, and I reflexively flicked off my seat belt,
Speaker 2: ready to fight or run. Well, she said, turning to
Speaker 2: smile with her cold smile. We're here. Been a pleasure
Speaker 2: meeting you punks, and God bless. The library was in
Speaker 2: an old post office building on a darkened side street.
Speaker 2: Greek style column supported the front of the stone building,
Speaker 2: and a single flickering bulb and a scance illuminated the door.
Speaker 2: A hand lettered wooden sign read Pendleton Library Still free,
Speaker 2: Still open to the public ten am to four pm,
Speaker 2: run by anarchists. Beneath it, someone attacked a piece of
Speaker 2: paper that read, we do not carry the anarchist cookbook.
Speaker 2: Get your bad politics and bad science recipes off the internet,
Speaker 2: not from us. I got that one from an actual
Speaker 2: anarchist bookstore. I had that sign up.
Speaker 3: But I want to make my what is it? What
Speaker 3: is the napalm recipe in that?
Speaker 2: Oh, I will not say that. I will not say
Speaker 2: recipes of such things online personally.
Speaker 3: No, but it doesn't work.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Also, don't make napal.
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, it never goes well.
Speaker 3: Yeah. Not something that's ever been used for liberatory purposes.
Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, we could find friends here. What's our cover story,
Speaker 2: I asked, Thursday shrugged, play it by ear back up
Speaker 2: whatever someone else comes up with. Thursday knocked. He broke
Speaker 2: up the rhythm of his knock, presumably to sound friendly
Speaker 2: and less like we might be cops. No one likes
Speaker 2: a cop knocker. It started raining out of the blue.
Speaker 2: There's been a few drops on the windshield in the
Speaker 2: last hour, but nothing serious. As soon as we stood
Speaker 2: under the awning of the library, the sky opened up.
Speaker 2: We're closed, A voice said, sleepily from the other side
Speaker 2: of the door. We're travelers, heard there were good people here.
Speaker 2: The door opened a slit. The white man peering through
Speaker 2: the crack looked to be a little bit older than us,
Speaker 2: maybe in his mid thirties. Gray streaked his thick black beard,
Speaker 2: and one half of his mustache was stark white. A
Speaker 2: spade was tattooed and faded blue on his cheek. Who
Speaker 2: told you that, Gertrude Miller? I said, she picked us
Speaker 2: up hitch hiking. There was fear in his face. His
Speaker 2: eyes darted to each of us in turn. Another face
Speaker 2: appeared behind his, a woman closer to my age, with
Speaker 2: pitch black hair cut into baby bangs that continued into
Speaker 2: an undercut on the side of her head, feral bangs.
Speaker 2: I'd heard the style called. They went well with her
Speaker 2: septum clicker and immaculate makeup. Sometimes I'm jealous of people
Speaker 2: who pull off high fems so well. Oh, for fuck's sake, Vasillis,
Speaker 2: she said, let them in. Sorry, The man, presumably Vascillius, mumbled.
Speaker 2: He opened the door and went inside. And do you
Speaker 2: know what they found inside there?
Speaker 3: Robert evans um, did they find the products and services
Speaker 3: that support this podcast.
Speaker 2: They did. They found exactly all of the objects and
Speaker 2: ephemeral things that you were about to hear about.
Speaker 3: Excellent, perfect, sexy.
Speaker 2: And we're back. I'm used to anarchist spaces being a
Speaker 2: little bit humble might be the polite word for it,
Speaker 2: scrappy dy. But this place looked like a library, a
Speaker 2: small one, sure, but also one inside a beautiful old
Speaker 2: post office building. Rows and rows of books on thick
Speaker 2: wooden shelves filled the downstairs. The only thing they'd done differently,
Speaker 2: it seemed, was try to kill the sterility one usually
Speaker 2: sees in small town libraries. Tasteful sconces set into the
Speaker 2: wall lit the place, and a slightly ragtag assortment of
Speaker 2: comfortable chairs and couches were everywhere you live here. I
Speaker 2: asked All of my questions about more pressing matters, like
Speaker 2: the apparently dead woman who'd driven us to town, were
Speaker 2: lost in my excitement about people having taken over a
Speaker 2: small town library and kept it running. It's funny because
Speaker 2: when I wrote all of this, like like, oh, they're
Speaker 2: going to privatize the parks, yeah, Like, well, at least
Speaker 2: it means we can probably take over my libraries.
Speaker 3: Going is going to be very impressive in the future.
Speaker 2: Yeah, totally, yeah, Vascillas said. He led us through the
Speaker 2: main room of the library. It's hard to walk past
Speaker 2: that many books without stopping to flip through them. But
Speaker 2: I followed him up the backstairs to the apartment above.
Speaker 2: It looked a lot more like places I was used to.
Speaker 2: The living room was still covered with Florida ceiling bookshelves,
Speaker 2: but there was also a dining table and a counter
Speaker 2: that separated off a small kitchen area. A short hallway
Speaker 2: led to three other doors, presumably two bedrooms in a bathroom. How,
Speaker 2: I asked, the county left it empty. We moved in.
Speaker 2: It's squatted then, technically, Vascillis said, But even the sheriff's
Speaker 2: wife comes here to check out books. I'm not sure
Speaker 2: anyone knows or even cares that no one legally owns
Speaker 2: the place. People assume we bought it, and we don't
Speaker 2: discourage them. I'm Heather, the woman said. As we did introductions. Wait,
Speaker 2: Vascilla said, after I introduced myself as Danielle, what's your
Speaker 2: last name? Cain, I waited, cringing to hear him call
Speaker 2: me Danny. He didn't you knew Clay? He said, we
Speaker 2: talked about you a lot last time he was through here.
Speaker 2: You know, Clay, Doomsday asked. At the same time, as
Speaker 2: the ice was broken by knowledge of a mutual friend,
Speaker 2: a different sort of tension filled the room, the tension
Speaker 2: of discussing a mutual dead friend. New knew Clay. None
Speaker 2: of these assholes had come to his funeral. Everywhere I traveled,
Speaker 2: people knew. Everyone talked about him like he was a
Speaker 2: magical gift from the universe to its denizens, which he was,
Speaker 2: and not one of them had made it to Denver
Speaker 2: to drink and mourn with me and his mom. Maybe
Speaker 2: I'd go out that way too, I'd live on in legend,
Speaker 2: but no one would feel obliged to actually miss me. Sure,
Speaker 2: Vascilla said, he came through a couple of times a year,
Speaker 2: always wanted to check out whatever new books we had.
Speaker 2: The books up here were in fact different from those
Speaker 2: on the shelves downstairs. A lot of them had blank spines,
Speaker 2: a lot of them were gold embossed. Some of them
Speaker 2: looked older than some people think the earth is. This
Speaker 2: isn't accult library. I asked, well, what else are you
Speaker 2: all doing here? Vasillis asked. He and I were the
Speaker 2: only ones still standing. I realized everyone else had made
Speaker 2: themselves comfortable on couches and chairs. Rain lashed against the windows,
Speaker 2: and thunder rumbled across the plane. We uh. I tried
Speaker 2: to figure out what to tell him. I tried to
Speaker 2: figure out what was safe to tell him. We're demon hunters,
Speaker 2: Vulture blurted out. He put down a book and his phone.
Speaker 2: He'd been taking pictures of the pages. We're on the
Speaker 2: run because of some stuff that went wrong, and Eulixie
Speaker 2: maybe killed a lot of people and some cops too,
Speaker 2: so much for a cover story. Doomsday and Thursday shot
Speaker 2: him the same look at the same time. The combined
Speaker 2: glare would have driven lesser men to silence, or at
Speaker 2: least to show remorse on their face. Vulture did neither.
Speaker 2: You demon hunters, Vasillis repeated, like the words didn't make
Speaker 2: sense in his mouth, like he was speaking some language
Speaker 2: he didn't know and was just parroting the phrase back.
Speaker 2: I mean we are now, I guess. Vulture gave his
Speaker 2: best whoop, sorry, look to the rest of us, you're
Speaker 2: here because of the disappearances. Then that was Heather, who
Speaker 2: was sitting next to Brynn on a love seat. Thursday
Speaker 2: said yes, Vulture said at the same time, Doomsday ritual
Speaker 2: must have done a hell of a lot more than
Speaker 2: get us a ride safely. What disappearances, I asked, you
Speaker 2: might want to sit down, Heather said, this is weird.
Speaker 2: I found myself in a large comfortable chair by the window,
Speaker 2: and Vasillis brought us all tea. Heather, with a cop
Speaker 2: in her hand, told us the story. There used to
Speaker 2: be two more of us living here. She started punctuating
Speaker 2: her sentence by blowing across her tea, Damien and Asola.
Speaker 2: Then there's Loki. I know Loki, I said. It's a
Speaker 2: small scene, hitchhiking, weirdos, queer, kind of small book thief.
Speaker 2: I'd stayed with them. Loki didn't like being called he
Speaker 2: or she. In Oakland for a couple weeks the summer before,
Speaker 2: they had been planning a rare book heist. I skipped
Speaker 2: down before I found out how it went. Yeah, Heather said,
Speaker 2: Loki came through with some books for us. Real shit,
Speaker 2: they said. Then they and Damien and Asola went winter
Speaker 2: camping in Glacier, and then none of them came back.
Speaker 2: Heather took a tiny sip of her tea, decided that
Speaker 2: it was cool enough and took a longer sip. Months
Speaker 2: go by, no word from any of them. Vasillis and
Speaker 2: I tried to track them down, but never found anything.
Speaker 2: Not their car, nothing, a record in the back country
Speaker 2: hiking registry at Glacier, and that's it. Then this spring,
Speaker 2: a Sola shows up in town. She won't talk to us.
Speaker 2: Squat's an empty bed and breakfast at the edge of town.
Speaker 2: We see her around town sometimes, but it's like she
Speaker 2: looks right through us. She looks right through everyone else too.
Speaker 2: She's back, but she's not back. Where are the books
Speaker 2: Loki brought, Doomsday asked. Most of them are shelled now,
Speaker 2: Vasillis said, gesturing at the walls around us. Most of
Speaker 2: them are the same garbage you always find though. Ninety
Speaker 2: nine point nine percent of occult books or just trash, gibberish,
Speaker 2: packaged up all spooky, made to sell for as much
Speaker 2: money as possible. Most of them are shelved, Doomsday continued,
Speaker 2: Vasillis sighed. The three of them went to Glacier with
Speaker 2: one book, one that seemed legit. Loki says they stole
Speaker 2: it from some of Vola type fascists on the Olympic Peninsula,
Speaker 2: says those people had stolen it from somewhere in England,
Speaker 2: the Book of Barrow. Our friends took it to Glacier
Speaker 2: because they were going to try something out. What were
Speaker 2: they going to try out? Thursday asked, Vasillis looked to
Speaker 2: the floor. Heather answered, instead resurrection Loki wanted to hunt
Speaker 2: a bear and bring it back to life. Oh fuck that,
Speaker 2: Bren said. So they went out to the back country
Speaker 2: wilderness in the dead of winner to kill a hibernating bear,
Speaker 2: which by the way, doesn't count as hunting, and turn
Speaker 2: it into a zombie bear. And then they didn't come back.
Speaker 2: Thursday asked, gee, I can't think of anything that might
Speaker 2: have gone wrong with that plan. What a mystery, Thursday
Speaker 2: Doomsday said, No, Thursday said, you've got to be kidding me.
Speaker 2: Mystery solved. They got killed by winter or the bear,
Speaker 2: and frankly, it's hard to claim they didn't have it coming.
Speaker 2: What about Gertrude Miller, I asked. She told us she
Speaker 2: was dead six months then was resurrected. Honestly, Heather said,
Speaker 2: Looking at Thursday, when they didn't come back from Glacier,
Speaker 2: Vasillis and I thought the same thing you did. But
Speaker 2: then a Sola came back. Okay, she's shell shocked and
Speaker 2: doesn't want to talk to us. Heather turned to me.
Speaker 2: But then Gertrude came back. She was dead for six months.
Speaker 2: She was telling the truth about that, then, I said,
Speaker 2: Heather nodded. Vulture clapped his hands together. We all looked
Speaker 2: at him, and he tried and failed to wipe the
Speaker 2: smile off his face. Sorry, he said, It's just we
Speaker 2: have our first mystery. Yeah, Thursday side, we'll start first
Speaker 2: thing in the morning. Dinner consisted of reheated couscous, baked potatoes,
Speaker 2: and green salad. There were too many of us for
Speaker 2: the table, so we ate on the couches and easy chairs.
Speaker 2: We talked about friends in common who weren't dead or missing,
Speaker 2: the state of the anarchist movement and its role in
Speaker 2: fighting the rise of fascism and nationalism globally. Then more
Speaker 2: interesting to me the state of magic. How many practitioners
Speaker 2: do you think there are, I asked, Until a couple
Speaker 2: of days ago. I've gone my whole life without seeing
Speaker 2: an ounce of real magic, and I have met plenty
Speaker 2: of people who spend their time trying it's hard to answer,
Speaker 2: Vascilla said, I guess that worldwide, we're talking about a
Speaker 2: a few hundred, maybe one thousand people who are real
Speaker 2: magicians who are tapped into what the endless spirits have
Speaker 2: to offer. Then below that, I don't know a couple
Speaker 2: million people who stumble upon magic here and there but
Speaker 2: mostly fail. What do you mean? As far as I
Speaker 2: can tell, there's only one system of magic that actually
Speaker 2: works with any consistency, and that involves appealing to or
Speaker 2: summoning directly the endless spirits. But there are a lot
Speaker 2: of rituals that end up tapping into that power kind
Speaker 2: of by accident, through a side door that people stumble
Speaker 2: upon from time to time as they practice other systems.
Speaker 2: Most of those side doors are for magic that only
Speaker 2: affects the practitioner. Like rituals to grant you courage, work well,
Speaker 2: rituals to heal yourself work a little less well. Rituals
Speaker 2: to heal other people almost never unless you're communicating directly
Speaker 2: with a specific spirit. Okay, I said, If there's a
Speaker 2: system of magic that works, why doesn't everyone know about it?
Speaker 2: Keeping information rare is harder and harder these days. Oh,
Speaker 2: I know, Vulture said. We all turned to look at him.
Speaker 2: He finished his food already and was lying across Heather
Speaker 2: and Brynn on the love seat. It's the Magic Feds,
Speaker 2: he said. I'm on this forum right, and I don't
Speaker 2: know a lot of it probably isn't true. But there's
Speaker 2: this thing people mention and no one knows its name.
Speaker 2: But it's the Magic Feds. And they're like Molder and Scully,
Speaker 2: but evil, well not evil from their point of view,
Speaker 2: but evil from my point of view. Yeah, Vasillis said,
Speaker 2: he used to be the church. Now it's the state.
Speaker 2: Still an inquisition. Wait, I said, should we be worried
Speaker 2: about this then? I mean, Vascillis said, as long as
Speaker 2: you don't do something crazy and spectacular, like said an
Speaker 2: endless spirit against your enemies in broad daylight, you'll be fine.
Speaker 2: Brinn started laughing, so I said, yes, we should be worried.
Speaker 2: There was a spare bedroom it had been a Sola
Speaker 2: and Damien's, and we piled in with our bags. Doomsday
Speaker 2: claimed the bed for herself on Thursday, and I laid
Speaker 2: my sleeping bag out on the floor. Vulture said he
Speaker 2: was going for a walk Thursday, said he was going
Speaker 2: to stand watch because something felt off. Brynn was out
Speaker 2: in the living room, still talking with Heather. I was exhausted,
Speaker 2: but as soon as I laid my head down on
Speaker 2: my bald up hoodie, I was awake too much, all
Speaker 2: in one day, too much, all in one week. I
Speaker 2: wanted Brynn there. I wanted to hold her. We'd been
Speaker 2: cuddling most nights. I hadn't kissed her or anything. I
Speaker 2: hadn't really been sure i'd been ready to do something
Speaker 2: like that, and vice versa. But I wanted to cuddle
Speaker 2: with her. She was out in the living room talking
Speaker 2: to a high femme, gorgeous stranger. That was fine, It
Speaker 2: would be Fineane had let up, but there was still
Speaker 2: thunder in the distance. Other than that, everything was quiet.
Speaker 2: Small towns are strange at night. None of the people
Speaker 2: noises of big cities, none of the car noises of
Speaker 2: busy rural roads, and none of the wild life noises
Speaker 2: of the countryside. Just that thunder and the sound of
Speaker 2: Brynn laughing from the living room. It wasn't fine. I
Speaker 2: was being an idiot, and I knew it. Brynn didn't
Speaker 2: owe me anything, and she wasn't doing anything wrong. Or
Speaker 2: even weird or mean. Knowing I was being an idiot
Speaker 2: didn't make it better. Couldn't I just think about the
Speaker 2: car crash? Instead? Lightning lit the room. Doomsday started snoring.
Speaker 2: Worry became anxiety. Anxiety started on its way towards panic.
Speaker 2: I got up, pulled my hoodie on, slipped on my boots,
Speaker 2: and went out to the living room. Brynn and Heather
Speaker 2: were leaning against one another, talking sweetly. Brynn caught my
Speaker 2: eye and smiled. It was fine. I went down the
Speaker 2: stairs and out the front door. Thursday was on the porch,
Speaker 2: staring off down the street. His backpack was in his hand,
Speaker 2: concealing his gun. Couldn't sleep, He asked, what is there
Speaker 2: to keep watch for? I asked, talking about something other
Speaker 2: than me would be good. It was what I needed.
Speaker 2: Hell if I know, Thursday said, I'm just I'm just
Speaker 2: trying to be useful. I feel that. I said, I'm
Speaker 2: not always this way. Thursday said, what way? I don't know?
Speaker 2: Protective kind of macho and nodded. I love Doomsday more
Speaker 2: than I love life itself. I'm worried about her, I'm
Speaker 2: worried about the rest of us. So I don't know
Speaker 2: what else to do besides watch out for her best.
Speaker 2: I know, how what do you like usually? Believe it
Speaker 2: or not. I think I'm usually the funny guy, he said.
Speaker 2: When shit ain't serious, I ain't serious either. It's just
Speaker 2: shit's real serious. Right now? I can feel that you
Speaker 2: like Brynn, he said. It wasn't a question. He'd seen
Speaker 2: the two of us together. Yeah, he looked over at me,
Speaker 2: took in my expression for a moment. You're jealous of
Speaker 2: her and Heather. No, I'm not. He didn't say anything
Speaker 2: to that. I guess I am.
Speaker 3: Want to know why.
Speaker 2: I think that is sure, I said, because you don't
Speaker 2: know where you stand with her. That's it. That's all.
Speaker 2: You figure out where you stand with her, You talk
Speaker 2: it over with her, and none of that shit will
Speaker 2: bother you any more. He was probably right, Doomsday and me,
Speaker 2: we know where we stand. She fucks someone else, how
Speaker 2: she falls in love with someone else, it wouldn't bug
Speaker 2: me much because she makes it clear where she and
Speaker 2: I stand. You all are polly. I feel like most
Speaker 2: of the people I know are polyamorous. But it still
Speaker 2: surprised me. The days seemed so I don't know traditional
Speaker 2: in a wandering a coultist with a bounty on their
Speaker 2: heads kind of way. I wouldn't worry about her and
Speaker 2: me unless I don't know. Idris Elba decided he was single,
Speaker 2: started hanging around. Doomsday is a crush on Idris Elba.
Speaker 2: Hell if I know, Thursday said, I'm the one with
Speaker 2: a crush on Idris Elba. I laughed at that, Glad
Speaker 2: to know I can still be funny when shit's serious.
Speaker 2: He said, I'm glad I met you all. I said,
Speaker 2: this is hands down the weirdest week of my life,
Speaker 2: but I'm glad I've gotten to meet you all. You too,
Speaker 2: Danielle Kane. I'm going to go back and try and
Speaker 2: sleep again. I said, don't say anything to her what
Speaker 2: you're in sad sack mode. I get it, we're all
Speaker 2: sad sacks sometimes. But if you go talk to her
Speaker 2: right now, you're going to come across wrong, You'll come
Speaker 2: across controlling. Just go to bed, and if she cuddles
Speaker 2: up with you, cuddle right back, and if not, try
Speaker 2: not to stress about it. Thanks for looking out for us, Thursday,
Speaker 2: Sleep well, Danielle Kane. On my way back through the library,
Speaker 2: I saw three rats on the checkout counter. I have
Speaker 2: a hard time getting mad at rats, all the best
Speaker 2: animals or scavengers squatters. On my way back through the
Speaker 2: living room, I saw Heather sitting next to Brynn. Heather's
Speaker 2: arm was across Brynn's lap, and Brynn had a needle
Speaker 2: and ink in her hand. She was tattooing Heather. I
Speaker 2: couldn't tell what the design was. Brynn looked up at
Speaker 2: me and smiled sweetly, and I knew Thursday was right.
Speaker 2: If I told Bryn I was sad. Hell, if I
Speaker 2: said anything at all, it would come across wrong, and
Speaker 2: Brenn wouldn't be smiling so sweetly. No more. I smiled
Speaker 2: back and went down the hall to where my sleeping
Speaker 2: bag waited for me. It was fine, I was fine.
Speaker 2: That's the end of chapter two.
Speaker 3: Well, I'm excited. I'm especially excited for the Magic Feds
Speaker 3: because I fall asleep many nights watching X Files, and.
Speaker 2: I've been watching Twin Peaks recently. Oh yeah, yeah, Magic
Speaker 2: Feds are a good trope.
Speaker 3: It's great in part because, like, no matter how horrifying
Speaker 3: you make like the Magic Fed story, it'll be less
Speaker 3: scary than what they normally do. That's I say, on
Speaker 3: the day as Habitat for Humanity's bank accounts were frozen
Speaker 3: by the FBI.
Speaker 1: Fuck.
Speaker 2: Oh. Sometimes I'm like, we all want the like weird
Speaker 2: to demon hunting version of the world because the actual
Speaker 2: monsters are Yes, we know who they are, They're in power.
Speaker 3: I've always made this argument Scully is a cop Fox
Speaker 3: Molder is not a cop.
Speaker 2: Yeah, totally.
Speaker 3: He never even arrests anyone.
Speaker 2: He's just a nerd who got dragged along.
Speaker 3: No charge is brought. He loses his gun every third episode.
Speaker 1: You know what we all like.
Speaker 2: It's the same as how like with billionaires, I just
Speaker 2: want them to stop being billionaires. You know, they can
Speaker 2: choose to stop being billionaires. I believe that Molder would
Speaker 2: join the side of the right.
Speaker 3: Well, Moulder would be surprised if you put it out
Speaker 3: he still has a batch.
Speaker 2: I'm still waiting for the day where you and I
Speaker 2: just get to write a like X Files reboot instead
Speaker 2: of worrying about the world falling into fascism'.
Speaker 3: That's the dream. That's the dream, And suddenly the primary
Speaker 3: conflict in our life will be you repeatedly trying to
Speaker 3: convince me that every episode can't be about Bigfoot, and
Speaker 3: you have.
Speaker 2: To convince me every single time that they can't just
Speaker 2: quit their jobs. That actually one of the core components
Speaker 2: of the show is that they had to have those jobs.
Speaker 3: Those two issues will be the Yoko Ono of our
Speaker 3: creative relationship.
Speaker 2: Anyway, Part three happens next week, and you all can
Speaker 2: write wait or you can go find the book. And
Speaker 2: also if you're like, wow, I'm really enjoying this, I
Speaker 2: want audiobooks of this book, the one that came before it,
Speaker 2: and the third book in the series that isn't even
Speaker 2: out yet. Well, have I got a deal for you.
Speaker 2: There's a kickstarter. It's really cheap. We saw our audiobooks
Speaker 2: for really cheap because we're an independent publisher, which means
Speaker 2: our books are slightly more expensive than we wish who
Speaker 2: they were. I mean, they're like a normal heist. But
Speaker 2: that's still too high because we're weird punks. But right,
Speaker 2: we can make the audiobooks really cheap because there's no
Speaker 2: paper that we have to pay for, so we passed
Speaker 2: the savings onto you. Anyway, see you next week.
Speaker 3: I'm all right, that's it, baby.
Speaker 1: It could happen here as a production of Cool Zone Media.
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Speaker 1: cool zonemedia dot com, or check us out on the
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Speaker 1: you can find sources for It could happen here, Updated
Speaker 1: monthly at cool zonemedia dot com slash sources. Thanks for listening.