Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning.
Speaker 1: This is Laura, Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's
Speaker 1: tip is to find a go to question that helps
Speaker 1: you connect meaningfully with people you know well and those
Speaker 1: you have just met. We all want to connect, but
Speaker 1: sometimes our usual chit chat doesn't do it, and a default,
Speaker 1: thoughtful first question can help. So. I was recently introduced
Speaker 1: to the new podcast Your Mama's Kitchen with host Michelle Norris.
Speaker 1: On each episode of Your Mama's Kitchen, Norris interviews a
Speaker 1: person about the role of food and family in their
Speaker 1: early life and its lasting impact on who they are today.
Speaker 1: Norris begins each podcasts simply by saying to her guest,
Speaker 1: tell me about your mama's kitchen. That's a question that's
Speaker 1: bound to bring up something one way or another, and
Speaker 1: so the material gets good fast. In a similar vein
Speaker 1: on the podcast On Being, host Krista Tippett starts each
Speaker 1: interview by inviting her guests to tell her about what
Speaker 1: she calls the spiritual or religious background of their childhood.
Speaker 1: Both questions elicit early memories about a particular aspect of life.
Speaker 1: You get to know the person quickly, as they talk
Speaker 1: about these foundational and specific to them, but also close
Speaker 1: to universal experiences. Of course, you don't have to be
Speaker 1: a professional interviewer to ask questions that lead to deep conversation.
Speaker 1: Though it might not always be appropriate to ask random
Speaker 1: people about their childhood's spirituality. You do have to use
Speaker 1: your judgment, but even so, a little thought, little trial
Speaker 1: and error can help you generate a great first question
Speaker 1: if you are interested in the role of work and
Speaker 1: purpose in people's lives. When people refer to their jobs
Speaker 1: or volunteer commitments, you might ask what drew you to
Speaker 1: your work, or you could ask what was your first job?
Speaker 1: Or even what did you learn at your first job?
Speaker 1: That is still helpful now? Whatever the context, it can
Speaker 1: be fun to ask people what surprised them about an
Speaker 1: experience they have just mentioned. This works for pretty much
Speaker 1: anything new in their lives new job, new home, new baby,
Speaker 1: new puppy, newly empty nesting, new bifocals. You can also
Speaker 1: ask what was surprising about a conference or a class
Speaker 1: reunion they attended recently, a city they just visited, a
Speaker 1: restaurant they tried, or many other experiences. It's a good
Speaker 1: first question to follow onto any scrap of information that
Speaker 1: you have been handed. I know of a person who
Speaker 1: routinely asks people what's been bringing them joy lately. Hopefully
Speaker 1: a happy conversation will ensue after that. If you love traveling,
Speaker 1: when you encounter other people who love traveling, you can
Speaker 1: ask them if they have been on any great trips lately.
Speaker 1: The same is true for reading read any good books lately.
Speaker 1: On the other podcast, I host Best of Both Worlds.
Speaker 1: My co host Sarah hart Unger and I often ask
Speaker 1: our guests to describe a typical day in their lives.
Speaker 1: We have found that our listeners love to know the
Speaker 1: details and logistics about the lives of successful people, and
Speaker 1: asking about a typical day offers a great window into
Speaker 1: what a person's daily life actually looks like. So if
Speaker 1: you want to deepen your interactions this year, finding a
Speaker 1: few go two big questions that invite the people around
Speaker 1: you to share who they are and the stories of
Speaker 1: their lives can be smart. I will note that for
Speaker 1: people you see again and again, you obviously don't want
Speaker 1: to ask the same question every time you talk. As
Speaker 1: someone who has been a repeat guest on some podcasts,
Speaker 1: I know firsthand that you do sometimes need to rotate,
Speaker 1: but if you have a few questions ready to go,
Speaker 1: you have tools for reliably nudging conversations along. You won't
Speaker 1: spend your life talking about the weather or how busy
Speaker 1: everyone is, and that is a good in its own right.
Speaker 1: Do you have a favorite first question? You can let
Speaker 1: me know about it at Laura at Laura vandercam dot com.
Speaker 1: In the meantime, this is Laura. Thanks for listening, and
Speaker 1: here's to making the most of our time. Thanks for
Speaker 1: listening to Before Breakfast. If you've got questions, ideas, or feedback,
Speaker 1: you can reach me at Laura at Laura vandercam dot com.
Speaker 1: Before Breakfast is a production of iHeartMedia. For more podcasts
Speaker 1: from iHeartMedia, please visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or
Speaker 1: wherever you listen to your favorite shows.