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Speaker 1: Text you will. He then text you will. There's a

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Speaker 1: saying that good fences make good neighbors. Yes, there's another

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Speaker 1: saying that says bad neighbors make good fertilizer. Well I

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Speaker 1: don't support that one, but I will say I do

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Speaker 1: see the point, ah, because annoying neighbors can really get

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Speaker 1: on your nerves and create unnecessarily problems for you in

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Speaker 1: your life.

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Speaker 2: Okay, that's true.

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Speaker 1: And apparently there's something that's going on with one of

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Speaker 1: our listeners, Allison and her next door neighbor.

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Speaker 2: Please tell me the neighbor's still above ground after Jeffrey's

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Speaker 2: intro there.

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Speaker 1: Let's find out maybe she needs to text the Morgue

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Speaker 1: or something to come pick them up. Allison, how you doing?

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Speaker 2: Oh?

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Speaker 3: Do I need you guys help?

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Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, Alison, we're not that close of friends. Man.

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Speaker 2: I'm not taking one down to you.

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Speaker 3: I'm telling you. I have these neighbors. So a few

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Speaker 3: months ago they got this cute white dog and it

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Speaker 3: was fine. I heard some barking, and then the barking

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Speaker 3: got more. Every single time there's a wind blowing a

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Speaker 3: squirrel a rabbit. We have rabbits in the backyard. Barking

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Speaker 3: driving me nuts. I mean, really, okay, just I'm serious.

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Speaker 2: It feels like you're gonna break right now just even

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Speaker 2: talking about it.

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Speaker 1: Is there anybody that you could get rid of all

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Speaker 1: the squirrels and stop the wind in your neighborhood that.

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Speaker 2: I like that?

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Speaker 3: Yeah? Yeah? Really, so get this. I've already texted neighbors

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Speaker 3: and I said, hey, listen, because I hate confrontation, you know,

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Speaker 3: I was like, please doction sparking for five hours? Could

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Speaker 3: you just like you maybe take him in a little bit.

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Speaker 2: You know, though, I will say when we first got

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Speaker 2: our dog, we didn't realize it. When we would go

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Speaker 2: out to the bars at night, she would stay out

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Speaker 2: barking all night. And so finally one of our neighbors

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Speaker 2: wrote us a no, and we felt terrible. You know,

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Speaker 2: of course, we didn't let the dog out at night anymore.

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Speaker 1: Almost they happened in my apartment complex.

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Speaker 2: I remember.

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Speaker 1: One of the things was like, we didn't even know

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Speaker 1: or and so how did how did your neighbors react

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Speaker 1: when you sent that message to them?

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Speaker 3: Well, see, now see, you guys would act like a

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Speaker 3: normal neighbor. Okay, So they said, all right, we're going

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Speaker 3: to do something about it, and they're not gonna Oh

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Speaker 3: my god, that's with the dog anyway.

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Speaker 1: So they said that I know, I know you're very

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Speaker 1: wound up about this, Alise, and we can understand why. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: but just relax a second. We're here to help you.

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Speaker 1: And it sounds like you actually got a decent response

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Speaker 1: from that.

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Speaker 2: They said they'd take care of it.

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Speaker 3: Well they didn't. They didn't take care of it at all.

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Speaker 3: Matter of fact, the barking got worse. So I sent

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Speaker 3: them another text message.

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Speaker 2: Now we're getting messy.

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Speaker 1: Okay, Oh god, what did you say there?

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Speaker 3: Okay? So I was like please please, and I put

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Speaker 3: three pleases, you know, please stop your dog from barking,

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Speaker 3: and they just never responded after that.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it sounds too polite. No fliabors don't respond to that.

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Speaker 2: No, please, please please is not polite. One please is plate.

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Speaker 2: Three pleases is like condescending a most Okay.

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Speaker 3: But for the record, the first time I was very nice.

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Speaker 3: I mean, this says like the third text I've sent,

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Speaker 3: I just I can't take it anymore.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, we could tell. We can tell people other.

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Speaker 1: Than the dogs barking all the time. Are they bad

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Speaker 1: neighbors in any other way, They're fine.

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Speaker 3: Everything else I have, there's nothing else wrong really, Okay, Okay,

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Speaker 3: I'm not a complainer. I hate confrontation.

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Speaker 1: You're not a complainer, but you will come on the

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Speaker 1: radio and voice a pleasure about which is different.

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Speaker 2: Yeah we needed that. Yeah, for this segment, we.

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Speaker 1: Get that healthy, safe place to do.

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Speaker 2: But you don't want to ruin the relationship because like

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Speaker 2: living next door to someone that you hate or hates

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Speaker 2: you is going to be even worse than the dog barking?

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Speaker 3: Yes, yes, do you remember in New York City a

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Speaker 3: really long time ago where the you know, there's the

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Speaker 3: son of Sammy's the thing that made him snap with

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Speaker 3: the dog dog barking.

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Speaker 2: Okay, back to the fertilizer.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, we're not sure one hundred percent if exactly like

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Speaker 1: what she wants to do with this text messag.

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Speaker 2: I don't know if I want to know after she

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Speaker 2: just made that reference.

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Speaker 1: I mean, Alison, what's your overall goal with doing the

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Speaker 1: call this way?

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Speaker 3: All right? Okay, So here's the thing. I've been listening

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Speaker 3: to you guys, I love, love love you guys, and

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Speaker 3: I thought, you know what, these are the people to

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Speaker 3: help me. I just know it, and I just want

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Speaker 3: to know do you all have any kind of like

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Speaker 3: ideas or anything I could say. I mean, I just

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Speaker 3: I'm at a loss here and I need you.

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Speaker 1: But as far as the goal of the texting here,

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Speaker 1: are you trying to say we need to figure out

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Speaker 1: one text to get the dog to stop barking?

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Speaker 3: Yes?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, well, I mean the first thing we have to do.

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Speaker 1: They agreed to it before, but nothing happened.

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Speaker 2: But the first thing we have to do is even

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Speaker 2: get them to respond again, because they have left her

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Speaker 2: on read they don't like her.

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Speaker 1: Right, That's a good point. I think if we text

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Speaker 1: about the dog, they're knocking her answers. It's just been

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Speaker 1: the whole vibe of your relationship lately has been so

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Speaker 1: serious between you and your neighbors. Maybe we should start

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Speaker 1: off on a lighter note with like a dog pun

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Speaker 1: or a dog joke, like a knock joke.

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Speaker 2: I I like it. You don't like that, Alexis. I mean,

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Speaker 2: I wouldn't reply to anybody's puns.

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Speaker 1: So maybe we don't go with the pun. If you

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Speaker 1: do the knock knock route, you're like, knock knock, who's there?

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Speaker 1: Your dog's still barking?

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Speaker 3: Dog emotion you know what, you guys, humor. I've noticed

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Speaker 3: in my whole life humor always works. I think that's

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Speaker 3: a great idea.

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Speaker 2: All right, that is it. It's a take. So let's

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Speaker 2: make sure that we also included it's gonna be the

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Speaker 2: knock knock joke. Who's there your dog?

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Speaker 1: Who's there your dogs still barking? Yeah, that one.

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Speaker 2: They're not going to get it to reply to it.

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Speaker 2: It should just be a random dog joke. Like, I

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Speaker 2: don't know, do I like the dog? I like the

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Speaker 2: knock knock?

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: I feel like that's maybe if.

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Speaker 3: I put a happy face and it's like, you know,

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Speaker 3: emoji's or something, I would take.

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Speaker 2: This as route you need to do. Clyde literally read

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Speaker 2: this and be like this is the most backhanded I agree,

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Speaker 2: but I want to see what they were anyway.

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Speaker 1: For entertainment value, all right, bro, knock knock, as it's

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Speaker 1: still barking.

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Speaker 2: You add a laughing crying emoji and a cute little

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Speaker 2: puppy emoji. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's a great idea.

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Speaker 1: Even though this is probably some of the worst advice

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Speaker 1: we've ever given, I do want to try it.

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Speaker 2: So yeah, let's remember it is Jeff's idea.

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Speaker 1: I will take full response.

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Speaker 2: Take it out line by line, don't put it as

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Speaker 2: a paragraph.

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Speaker 1: That's a good call. Good call. So knock, knock, period return.

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Speaker 1: They are question mark return. Yes, your dog is still

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Speaker 1: barking emojis, laughing emoji and a dog emoji.

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Speaker 3: Yes, okay, got it.

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Speaker 1: I'm going to give it a shot.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god. You know it's going to get a response.

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Speaker 2: I don't know if it's going to get a positive response,

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Speaker 2: but it's going to get a response.

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Speaker 1: That was one of the two goals that we sent,

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Speaker 1: so we'd be halfway there.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe it just haack all right, you.

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Speaker 1: Know, so you sent that out, Alison. Yeah, okay, we're

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Speaker 1: gonna come back to warn her neighborhood or we're the

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Speaker 1: greatest peacemakers of all time and they should use this

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Speaker 1: technique at the United Nations. Yeah, we're going to come

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Speaker 1: back and we'll continue with textual healing. Right after this,

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Speaker 1: we're on the phone with Alison for another segment of

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Speaker 1: textual Healing.

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Speaker 2: And I'm worried about her heart rate.

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Speaker 1: She's stressed out because she has an issue with her

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Speaker 1: next door neighbors, who actually, from the sound of it,

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Speaker 1: seemed like very nice, reasonable people, but they are fed

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Speaker 1: up with Alison because Alison keeps texting about their barking dog.

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Speaker 1: She's messaged several times before pleading that they get their

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Speaker 1: pupp to stay quiet. Nothing has worked, which is why

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Speaker 1: Alison came to us for help, and we decided to

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Speaker 1: go with a little knock knock dog humor. Yes, we

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Speaker 1: had her text her neighbor knock knock, who's there? Your

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Speaker 1: dog still barking in the backyard? Laugh emoji dog emoji

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Speaker 1: because funny to us, because we can hear the right

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Speaker 1: and but just one of our goals of this whole

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Speaker 1: thing was to get them to.

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Speaker 2: Respond, yeah, they've been leaving her on red totally.

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Speaker 1: Alison, have you gotten anything back from your neighbors yet?

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Speaker 3: Oh my god, I totally got to respond.

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Speaker 2: Yes, Oh my god, is it good or bad? Done

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Speaker 2: with our job?

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Speaker 1: Our goal?

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Speaker 2: I am dying to hear what they said?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, well was it okay? This is what they wrote back.

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Speaker 3: They said, We've tried, but Barney needs to express Barney

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Speaker 3: the dog needs to express his emotion, and we took

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Speaker 3: him to the vet. This is what our vet said.

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Speaker 3: We got a holistic vet and Barney has to express himself.

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Speaker 3: That's what they told me.

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Speaker 1: He's barking for his mental health.

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Speaker 2: My dog sees a holistic vet too.

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Speaker 1: A holistic what do they do acupuncture?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: How do you feel about that, Alice? And what's your reaction?

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Speaker 3: I am beside myself. I mean, what's the world?

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Speaker 1: Okay, Well, okay, she has.

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Speaker 2: A holistic I mean you should try barking.

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Speaker 1: Express Okay, So now we need to respond. Alexis, what

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Speaker 1: do you think you're expert? You're an expert at dealing

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Speaker 1: with like high confrontation, and you love dogs.

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Speaker 2: That plays the bagpipes. I don't say anything to that guy. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: but your roommates twin sister is in vet school. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: we're pro dogs. Us blame the neighbor. Actually we usually

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Speaker 2: say it's the neighbor's fall.

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Speaker 1: Well, let's let's use I mean that they clearly trust

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Speaker 1: what their vet says. Maybe we can go off of

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Speaker 1: something like veterinary.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, what if we throw some information back at them,

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Speaker 2: because I mean, the thing with holistic health is sometimes

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Speaker 2: there's some gray area. And what if you said that's interesting,

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Speaker 2: because that's not saying you agree or disagree with a

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Speaker 2: holistic fat Did you say that's interesting maybe your dog

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Speaker 2: could express themselves in other ways, like playing fetch, or

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Speaker 2: have you thought about getting one of those doggie pads

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Speaker 2: where it talks to you when it pushes the button, or.

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Speaker 1: Some sort of like dog art class that lets you

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Speaker 1: get your rage as paint.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you know what?

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Speaker 3: Why not? I mean maybe I should take a little

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Speaker 3: more calm approach.

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Speaker 1: All right, it sounds like you like it, Allison. Let's

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Speaker 1: text it that. Yeah. Yeah, all right, Brooks say that

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Speaker 1: again so that Allison can.

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Speaker 2: Text say you just say, that's interesting. Maybe your dog

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Speaker 2: could express itself in different ways good, Perhaps perhaps fetch

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Speaker 2: or one of those dog pads where it can talk

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Speaker 2: to you.

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Speaker 1: Okay, good, good thing, this is a Twitter and you

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Speaker 1: don't have like a cap limit on Yeah. I mean,

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Speaker 1: do you remember I write? It's good because at that

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Speaker 1: point you're not attacking them anymore. You're trying to be

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Speaker 1: helpful and part of the solution. And Brooke did a

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Speaker 1: good job asking questions as good because you're trying to

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Speaker 1: help and learn and like it. I know jose Is

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Speaker 1: giving brook the credit there, but let's give Alexis credit.

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Speaker 2: For that text. Okay, Brooke took the words out of

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Speaker 2: my mouth. Before I say that. It was like telepathectly

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Speaker 2: to Brook, like a deer in a headlight when you

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Speaker 2: asked after you stole my answer.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, thought Allison, go ahead send that if you haven't already.

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Speaker 3: Okay, I just sent it. I send it already.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, all right, you sound like that sounded like a

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Speaker 2: small dog.

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Speaker 3: You should stand in the backyard and bark.

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Speaker 2: Right. Do you work from home? Is that why this

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Speaker 2: is such an issue for you? The dog barking?

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Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, you read my mind Yes, I do.

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Speaker 3: I work from home.

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Speaker 2: The mind reader as well. Jeffery, just to me, can you.

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Speaker 1: Guess what they're going to respond with, Brooke, What are

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Speaker 1: they going to say back to our text.

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Speaker 2: Well, they're probably gonna shoot down both their ideas.

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Speaker 3: Ye oh my god.

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Speaker 2: I thought that maybe we could send him an Amazon

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Speaker 2: link next.

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Speaker 3: Oh my god. They just they just responded. They said

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Speaker 3: that I have to respect the free will of all creatures,

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Speaker 3: and they remained free. And she said, if he chooses

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Speaker 3: to be an outside dog, we have to let him

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Speaker 3: be free. Oh my god, oh my god.

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Speaker 2: Okay, I mean the only answer is you then have

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Speaker 2: to wake up at two in the morning and start

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Speaker 2: practicing drums or something.

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Speaker 3: You know what I mean?

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Speaker 2: In retribution?

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Speaker 1: Well, that's getting ugly.

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Speaker 3: You know what, maybe I should take You know, my

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Speaker 3: mamaways used to say take the high road, right, then

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Speaker 3: get high.

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Speaker 2: These people aren't even on the road.

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Speaker 1: Look, maybe because maybe we just lean into this even more.

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Speaker 1: That's what alexis in her all her wisdom would tell you,

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Speaker 1: don't try and push back constantly, try and lean into it.

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Speaker 1: And instead of fight with them, why not say you

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Speaker 1: know what, you're right? That immediately disarms them. Wait wait, wait, see,

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Speaker 1: let me finish you're right. Who are we to say

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Speaker 1: when and where your dog can bark? I want to

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Speaker 1: get to know your dog better. Please let me dogs

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Speaker 1: sit further you on your next vacation. Oh I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: scare them, but that's good.

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Speaker 2: Excuse me? What do you I don't trust did you

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Speaker 2: hear Alison?

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Speaker 1: I don't trust her being alone when he disappears under

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Speaker 1: your care. It's like it was the dog's free will.

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Speaker 1: Who was I to stop your dog from to.

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Speaker 2: This is not my idea that.

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Speaker 1: Broke so seriously, though, are you open to like dog sitting?

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Speaker 1: And maybe that'll disarm the tension between the two neighbors.

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Speaker 3: Here's the thing. I love animals, I just don't want

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Speaker 3: them barking in my face twenty four hours a day.

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Speaker 3: But you know what, maybe if I got to know him,

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Speaker 3: you know, and he is pretty cute, and I don't know,

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Speaker 3: maybe I should just I really, maybe I should just

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Speaker 3: take the high roads. You know, why did you?

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Speaker 1: You both take the high road? Be nice to the doggie,

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Speaker 1: but leave the front gate unlocking.

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Speaker 2: I mean that is free will, because they're actually going

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Speaker 2: against their dogs free will by keeping them in a

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Speaker 2: caged h don't tell, don't tell them.

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Speaker 3: You know what, You're right though, it's an interesting point.

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Speaker 1: Okay, that's exactly what you should text to your neighbor.

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Speaker 2: So we didn't really solve anything here.

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Speaker 1: Well, I think we've at least got the communication going

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Speaker 1: between the two neighbors again, and there's not so much

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Speaker 1: like anger and animosity between you.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, you know what, you make me laugh. You did

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Speaker 3: solve something, because.

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Speaker 2: That's our mission, guys, that's what we always want to.

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Speaker 2: But don't actually like lose the dog on purpose. Right,

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Speaker 2: we understand that was a joke.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, we're just kidding.

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Speaker 3: No, there's so many coyotes and stuff, right, no, no, no.

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Speaker 1: All right, well, I'm going to call that a successful

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Speaker 1: edition of Textual Healing because we're out of time here.

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Speaker 2: But I like your loose interpretation of success.

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Speaker 1: Alexis calls it success and that's all that.

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Speaker 3: I don't know if I feel good about this one.

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Speaker 1: It's Brook and Jeffrey in the

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Speaker 2: Morning, Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning,