WEBVTT - Parenting Like A Millionaire w/ Millennial Revolution #1181 0:00:00.120 --> 0:00:02.880 Welcome to Out of Money. I'm Joel, and today I'm 0:00:02.920 --> 0:00:06.160 talking about parenting like a Millionaire with Christy and Bryce 0:00:06.200 --> 0:00:28.840 from Millennial Revolution. Okay, I don't know it's harder parenting 0:00:29.320 --> 0:00:32.080 or the cost of parenthood. Becoming a dad has been 0:00:32.120 --> 0:00:34.120 one of the greatest adventures of my life. It's taught 0:00:34.120 --> 0:00:36.360 me a lot about myself, It's forced me to grow 0:00:36.440 --> 0:00:38.520 up in some ways I probably needed to, and it's 0:00:38.520 --> 0:00:41.559 given me three additional best buds who bring joy, purpose 0:00:42.080 --> 0:00:46.199 and chaos into my everyday life. But parenthood today it 0:00:46.240 --> 0:00:49.920 feels complicated. Kids, at least in many circles, seem less 0:00:49.920 --> 0:00:53.240 celebrated than they once were, and then financially while raising 0:00:53.240 --> 0:00:56.080 a family can feel more daunting than ever. Between housing, 0:00:56.280 --> 0:01:00.760 childcare activities, the endless activities, and all the other expenses 0:01:00.800 --> 0:01:03.400 that somehow multiply overnight, a lot of parents are asking 0:01:03.640 --> 0:01:05.880 how do we make this work? And that's why I 0:01:05.880 --> 0:01:08.399 wanted to bring Christy and Bryce a Millennial Revolution on 0:01:08.440 --> 0:01:11.520 the show. They've just written a really practical new book, 0:01:11.760 --> 0:01:14.880 parent Like a Millionaire without being one, about raising kids 0:01:14.880 --> 0:01:18.440 thoughtfully and confidently without needing a seven figure bank account. 0:01:18.600 --> 0:01:20.960 Christy and Bryce, thank you for coming on the show. 0:01:21.360 --> 0:01:22.679 Thanks so much for having us roll. 0:01:22.840 --> 0:01:27.360 Hi, Glad you're here. Glad you're here. Okay, So first 0:01:27.400 --> 0:01:29.240 question I ask everybody who comes on the show is 0:01:29.280 --> 0:01:31.640 what they like to splurge on wist their craft beer equivalent. 0:01:32.520 --> 0:01:34.640 The boring answers obviously travel. I know you guys travel, 0:01:34.680 --> 0:01:36.520 but you don't spend much money traveling. So what is 0:01:36.560 --> 0:01:39.520 it that you do spend wildly on, maybe while you're 0:01:39.560 --> 0:01:41.639 also being thoughtful in saving investing for your future. 0:01:43.080 --> 0:01:43.280 Yeah. 0:01:43.319 --> 0:01:46.160 I think before kids, it used to be eating out 0:01:46.160 --> 0:01:49.440 as well. I mean there were like we did value 0:01:49.440 --> 0:01:51.440 going out to like next restaurants every now and then, 0:01:51.600 --> 0:01:54.440 like you know, splurging on things that we value and 0:01:54.480 --> 0:01:58.120 not just like the cheapest possible thing. Now, after we've 0:01:58.120 --> 0:02:00.880 had our kid, it seems to have change. I think 0:02:00.920 --> 0:02:04.240 it's more towards what for him, it's splurting on him 0:02:04.720 --> 0:02:09.320 rather than aren't on ourselves. I guess for him, I 0:02:09.360 --> 0:02:12.400 think it's probably still related to travel, but a different sense, 0:02:12.480 --> 0:02:15.160 like travel to be more convenient and more comfortable. So 0:02:15.200 --> 0:02:17.560 for example, we used to just like get off a 0:02:17.600 --> 0:02:19.280 flight and then go on a bus and then go 0:02:19.360 --> 0:02:22.280 to like a cheap hotel, but now with him, it's 0:02:22.320 --> 0:02:24.760 pretty impossible, and you have to worry about nap times. 0:02:24.760 --> 0:02:27.239 You don't want him to be too cranky. So now 0:02:27.280 --> 0:02:29.200 we do splurge on you know, if we need to 0:02:29.200 --> 0:02:32.359 get an expensive hotel that is specifically in the airport 0:02:32.480 --> 0:02:34.919 without us having to travel anywhere, and we could have 0:02:34.919 --> 0:02:36.920 gotten a way cheaper hotel, but for the sake of 0:02:36.919 --> 0:02:38.560 our son and having him be able to go to 0:02:38.600 --> 0:02:41.959 sleep right after like a red eye flight, that's something 0:02:42.000 --> 0:02:44.800 that we would splurge on. So comfort will travel with 0:02:44.840 --> 0:02:46.919 our son, which is something that we would have never 0:02:46.960 --> 0:02:47.680 considered before. 0:02:47.880 --> 0:02:48.079 Yeah. 0:02:48.120 --> 0:02:50.919 Before we would just yeah, yeah, before we just be like, suck. 0:02:50.680 --> 0:02:52.880 It up and just just just just just figure out 0:02:53.040 --> 0:02:56.200 how to two hund bucks by doing that. Now, Okay, 0:02:56.200 --> 0:02:58.400 there's a difference being travel and enjoyable travel, and that's 0:02:58.880 --> 0:03:00.560 that even if you have to pay more money for 0:03:00.600 --> 0:03:02.760 that is like, it's better if it's enjoyable because you 0:03:02.840 --> 0:03:04.480 want to do it more and he'll have a good time. 0:03:04.480 --> 0:03:06.960 When it's your own discomfort, it's one thing, and when 0:03:07.080 --> 0:03:09.200 it's the discomfort of your kid, it's another. And then 0:03:09.240 --> 0:03:12.480 guess what their discomfort impacts your comfort level? Yes, yeah, yes, 0:03:12.560 --> 0:03:13.519 probably what they for money. 0:03:13.560 --> 0:03:15.639 Yeah, it's going to be your problem regardless, sooner or later. 0:03:15.760 --> 0:03:19.200 Yeah, exactly, exactly. You still got to put up with it. Okay, 0:03:19.960 --> 0:03:22.639 we seem like a meaningful decline in birth rates across 0:03:22.639 --> 0:03:26.760 the developed world in your estimation, What role does money 0:03:26.800 --> 0:03:29.560 play in the fact that people are having fewer babies 0:03:29.639 --> 0:03:29.959 right now? 0:03:30.240 --> 0:03:32.360 Oh? Absolutely huge. I think one of the articles that 0:03:32.440 --> 0:03:35.440 scares people is the statistics that came out of the 0:03:35.560 --> 0:03:38.920 USDA number which when you adjust it for inflation, it 0:03:39.040 --> 0:03:43.000 costs three hundred thousand dollars per kid to raise them 0:03:43.000 --> 0:03:45.240 to the age of eighteen on average, on. 0:03:45.280 --> 0:03:48.960 Average, and this and how accurate is that headline? 0:03:49.320 --> 0:03:52.440 So what I discovered is the headline scares everyone. But 0:03:52.600 --> 0:03:56.040 what people don't realize is that it's actually when you 0:03:56.080 --> 0:03:58.920 break down the specifics and you look at it, that 0:03:58.920 --> 0:04:02.000 that number is an average and it changes depending on 0:04:02.040 --> 0:04:05.000 how much how high your salary is. So that's for 0:04:05.120 --> 0:04:07.680 the average salary, but if you have a lower salary 0:04:07.760 --> 0:04:10.040 or if you have a higher salary, it's higher than 0:04:10.040 --> 0:04:12.520 that number or lower than that number, which is interesting 0:04:12.520 --> 0:04:14.760 if you think about it, because if you get a raise, 0:04:15.000 --> 0:04:16.800 but then all of a sudden, your cost of raising 0:04:16.800 --> 0:04:19.359 a kid goes up. Does that mean the kid suddenly 0:04:19.400 --> 0:04:22.039 became more expensive because you've got to raise or is 0:04:22.080 --> 0:04:26.160 this just another lifestyle inflation that happens as a result 0:04:26.240 --> 0:04:28.799 of you know, you have more money now, so you're thinking, okay, 0:04:28.839 --> 0:04:30.880 well I might as well spend it on extra I 0:04:30.880 --> 0:04:33.640 don't know, like activities or upgrading going to private school 0:04:33.680 --> 0:04:37.120 or something that is not absolutely necessary. But you think, hey, 0:04:37.160 --> 0:04:38.479 this is you know, I got to keep up with 0:04:38.480 --> 0:04:41.920 the Joneses family style. So there's some additional factor that 0:04:42.000 --> 0:04:43.360 causes that spending to go up. 0:04:43.480 --> 0:04:45.560 Yeah, it's the when we break down what if we 0:04:45.600 --> 0:04:47.719 break down in our book, is that there is a 0:04:47.920 --> 0:04:50.280 relatively low fixed cost of like Okay, you have to 0:04:50.279 --> 0:04:51.719 feed your gid, you have to clothe your kid, you 0:04:51.760 --> 0:04:53.520 have to get him like you have to give them 0:04:53.520 --> 0:04:55.039 health care and all this kind of stuff. But then 0:04:55.080 --> 0:04:58.799 there's a there's quite a wide range of variable costs 0:04:58.800 --> 0:05:02.400 that can that are layered on top of that. And 0:05:02.560 --> 0:05:05.599 those kinds of costs are choice are choices that the 0:05:05.640 --> 0:05:08.640 parents make, and you don't have to judge the pairents 0:05:08.680 --> 0:05:11.159 of what choices they can make or not make. But 0:05:11.240 --> 0:05:13.120 the point is you do have the option of that, 0:05:13.200 --> 0:05:16.120 and that alleviates I think a lot of people's fears 0:05:16.200 --> 0:05:17.960 of like, oh my god, this kid is going to 0:05:18.040 --> 0:05:18.400 cost much. 0:05:18.520 --> 0:05:20.599 Kids can cost a lot, but they don't have to. 0:05:21.400 --> 0:05:23.080 Well, in the big part of it has to be 0:05:23.160 --> 0:05:28.360 what we deem necessary in the modern American era in 0:05:28.440 --> 0:05:31.840 Canadian area y'all are in Canada. It's what we think 0:05:32.040 --> 0:05:35.599 is a necessity versus what actually is. I mean, I'm 0:05:35.680 --> 0:05:38.840 like reading a lot of Western fiction right now and 0:05:39.240 --> 0:05:43.560 growing up on the farm in the American diaspora right 0:05:44.200 --> 0:05:47.560 in Kansas or or something like that, or Montana. It 0:05:47.680 --> 0:05:50.279 just didn't involve a lot of perks. It didn't involve 0:05:50.440 --> 0:05:52.760 buying a lot of stuff, and families had a ton 0:05:52.800 --> 0:05:55.279 of kids often to help out, like on the farm. 0:05:55.880 --> 0:05:58.560 So is part of it just like what we have 0:05:59.080 --> 0:06:01.719 in some ways, I'm really clad that I'm not growing 0:06:01.760 --> 0:06:04.599 up on a farm in Iowa or raising my kids 0:06:04.720 --> 0:06:06.320 or that's not the lifestyle we want to lead. And 0:06:06.360 --> 0:06:08.239 we have a lot more optionality and choice in twenty 0:06:08.240 --> 0:06:11.920 twenty six, which is cool, But has that also led 0:06:11.960 --> 0:06:14.440 to an inability to think that we can have kids 0:06:14.480 --> 0:06:15.640 without spending a fortune? 0:06:16.120 --> 0:06:20.640 Yeah, there's the big baby industrial complex that we like 0:06:20.680 --> 0:06:23.000 to call like baby industrial complex that we like to 0:06:23.000 --> 0:06:25.640 call Big Baby in the book. And what happens is 0:06:25.640 --> 0:06:27.479 as soon as you get pregnant, because you have to 0:06:27.520 --> 0:06:30.520 search about prenatal classes, you have to search for diapers. 0:06:31.000 --> 0:06:33.159 As soon as that happens, it's almost like they're spying 0:06:33.200 --> 0:06:35.960 on what we call it, like spying on my uterus immediately. 0:06:36.200 --> 0:06:38.440 Why is it that I'm getting all these ads for 0:06:38.520 --> 0:06:42.039 stroller expensive strollers, like one thousand dollars strollers, and like 0:06:42.120 --> 0:06:45.039 baby carriers and all these name brand items, and you know, 0:06:45.080 --> 0:06:47.080 you have to give them the best formula. It has 0:06:47.120 --> 0:06:49.400 to have like no sugar, and don't give them similar 0:06:49.440 --> 0:06:51.280 because that's full of sugar and it's gonna be bad 0:06:51.320 --> 0:06:55.080 for them. It's just constantly being bombarded. Parents get constantly 0:06:55.120 --> 0:06:58.400 bombarded with all these things that they need to buy 0:06:58.480 --> 0:07:01.760 because spending more money on your kid equals love. That's 0:07:01.760 --> 0:07:05.480 actually one of the best marketing ploys because it helps 0:07:05.640 --> 0:07:08.400 it makes you feel guilty that you're not spending enough 0:07:08.440 --> 0:07:11.360 money on them. So Big Baby is definitely a big factor, 0:07:11.400 --> 0:07:14.520 and it's much harder to fight against it because there's 0:07:14.520 --> 0:07:17.680 so social media. There's so many influencers trying to sell 0:07:17.680 --> 0:07:20.680 you things. There's a lot of experts saying like this 0:07:20.800 --> 0:07:22.600 is safe and that's not safe, and some of it 0:07:22.640 --> 0:07:24.880 is absolutely true, but some of it is a little 0:07:24.880 --> 0:07:27.800 bit too exaggerated. So it's kind of hard to think 0:07:27.840 --> 0:07:30.320 for yourself when you're bombarded from all these different directions 0:07:30.400 --> 0:07:33.240 about which products are best for your kids, especially in 0:07:33.240 --> 0:07:35.040 the first few years of life when you have the 0:07:35.040 --> 0:07:37.680 most baby gear, and it doesn't really have to be 0:07:37.760 --> 0:07:40.120 this way. One of the things I realized that we 0:07:40.280 --> 0:07:42.400 like to call how to rent baby gear for Free, 0:07:42.760 --> 0:07:45.760 is that you don't have to buy all these things new. 0:07:45.800 --> 0:07:48.280 You can buy it secondhand and then sell it secondhand. 0:07:49.280 --> 0:07:52.600 And that's one of the ways to ride the depreciation curve, 0:07:52.600 --> 0:07:55.240 because baby gear is one of the things that depreciate 0:07:55.680 --> 0:08:00.400 faster than anything, faster than electronics, faster than cars. And 0:08:00.440 --> 0:08:03.000 a lot of the reason is because babies outgrow gear 0:08:04.680 --> 0:08:06.600 very quickly, and a lot of the times you buy 0:08:06.640 --> 0:08:10.440 this fancy crib and you're like, oh, I'm going to 0:08:10.520 --> 0:08:12.680 use this a really long time, or bascinet, and then 0:08:12.800 --> 0:08:15.640 my son the one that I bought it was it's 0:08:15.640 --> 0:08:18.320 like a Halo three sixty, which is one of these 0:08:18.560 --> 0:08:20.640 basinets that helps when you have a c section, so 0:08:20.680 --> 0:08:22.160 that you don't have to reach down. You can like 0:08:22.200 --> 0:08:25.760 push down part of the basinet and reach your baby easily. 0:08:25.920 --> 0:08:29.880 He outgrew that in two months. And the new price 0:08:29.920 --> 0:08:33.040 for this bacinet is three hundred dollars. I got it 0:08:33.040 --> 0:08:36.000 off Facebook marketplace for thirty five dollars, and then I 0:08:36.040 --> 0:08:37.960 was able to sell it for sixty five dollars because 0:08:37.960 --> 0:08:40.120 there were so many people asking for that and it 0:08:40.160 --> 0:08:40.920 was way underprice. 0:08:40.960 --> 0:08:43.240 You flip that baby, yeah, yeah, yeah, we're working a 0:08:43.240 --> 0:08:43.880 profit off of that. 0:08:44.280 --> 0:08:46.280 What we actually, what we realize is that if like 0:08:47.080 --> 0:08:49.480 it's like there isn't there is an instinct to try 0:08:49.679 --> 0:08:51.840 to get stuff as cheaply as possible if you are. 0:08:51.720 --> 0:08:53.040 Really looking out for your budget. 0:08:53.040 --> 0:08:56.319 But when it comes to baby gear, it's the opposite 0:08:56.360 --> 0:08:59.040 instinct that works, which is you want to find high end, 0:08:59.200 --> 0:09:02.679 name brand baby gear that will hold its value and 0:09:02.760 --> 0:09:04.960 you want to buy that, and you want to find 0:09:05.360 --> 0:09:07.280 ones that are like, you know, used for like less 0:09:07.280 --> 0:09:09.360 than a year kind of thing, and you obviously want 0:09:09.400 --> 0:09:09.920 to make. 0:09:09.760 --> 0:09:10.480 Sure that it's safe. 0:09:10.559 --> 0:09:12.520 There's you know, we recommend that you always look for 0:09:12.600 --> 0:09:15.440 if there's recall notices for certain for certain times, like 0:09:15.720 --> 0:09:18.280 cribs for example, that that's really important that you just 0:09:18.320 --> 0:09:20.480 make sure that there's no like real that they haven't 0:09:20.480 --> 0:09:23.760 found any problems with it. But if you can do that, 0:09:23.800 --> 0:09:27.600 then because the secondary market is so because the secondary 0:09:27.600 --> 0:09:31.840 market for those items is so broad and liquid, you 0:09:31.880 --> 0:09:35.120 can buy and sell into the same market and just 0:09:35.240 --> 0:09:37.959 basically just rent it for just the tiny slice of 0:09:38.000 --> 0:09:39.800 time that you're using that gear and then just release 0:09:39.840 --> 0:09:41.400 it back into the wild so that somebody else can 0:09:41.480 --> 0:09:41.760 enjoy it. 0:09:41.800 --> 0:09:41.920 Right. 0:09:42.160 --> 0:09:45.560 Ultimately, you just have to get over that belief that 0:09:45.760 --> 0:09:49.400 buying the new the new items, spending more money equates 0:09:49.400 --> 0:09:51.160 to you being a better parent, love and your kid. 0:09:51.040 --> 0:09:52.840 More, exactly exactly. 0:09:52.880 --> 0:09:54.840 And that's and that's just a and that is I 0:09:54.840 --> 0:09:56.600 had to, I had to, you know, my head off 0:09:56.679 --> 0:09:59.000 to all those genius marketers who came up with that. 0:09:59.080 --> 0:10:03.800 It's like, there's the two marketing messages that that that 0:10:03.840 --> 0:10:04.640 we constantly have. 0:10:04.679 --> 0:10:05.320 To fight against. 0:10:05.520 --> 0:10:08.240 Is one is real estate is never a bad deal 0:10:08.240 --> 0:10:10.440 because it not making more because you're a loser if 0:10:10.440 --> 0:10:13.480 you rent. And the second is spending more money means 0:10:13.480 --> 0:10:16.120 you love your kid more. Those are genius, like whoever 0:10:16.120 --> 0:10:19.040 came up with those things, just like, nah, right, it's 0:10:19.080 --> 0:10:22.520 not true, but it's but it's but it's very difficult 0:10:22.520 --> 0:10:24.439 to push back on them. But if you are successfully 0:10:24.440 --> 0:10:26.720 able to do that, then a lot of these assumptions 0:10:26.760 --> 0:10:29.400 that we all kind of have, like you know, baby 0:10:29.400 --> 0:10:31.280 gear is supposed to be expensive, it turns out that 0:10:31.320 --> 0:10:32.480 they don't have to be true at all. 0:10:33.200 --> 0:10:35.720 I feel like you guys are also pushing back against 0:10:35.800 --> 0:10:39.360 a kind of a cultural narrative that having kids is 0:10:39.440 --> 0:10:43.640 just for rich people, which it never used to be, 0:10:43.800 --> 0:10:46.559 Like for as long as I've remembered, like that's never 0:10:46.600 --> 0:10:47.959 been a thing, but it seems like just in the 0:10:48.040 --> 0:10:51.760 last five five or so years that's kind of become. 0:10:52.640 --> 0:10:54.480 There's there's a new focus on this. I mentioned it 0:10:54.520 --> 0:10:58.160 actually last week in an interview because my guest had 0:10:58.240 --> 0:11:01.320 seven has seven kids, and I was asking if he 0:11:01.400 --> 0:11:05.280 had seen that as like a trope or and he 0:11:05.320 --> 0:11:06.760 was like, no, I actually, I actually I haven't even 0:11:06.760 --> 0:11:08.040 seen that. But I feel like I've seen a lot 0:11:08.080 --> 0:11:10.120 of young people being like, man, if you can have 0:11:10.160 --> 0:11:13.920 four plus kids, you're rich, Like well done, that's the 0:11:13.960 --> 0:11:16.800 new status symbol instead of driving the fancy car, Is 0:11:17.200 --> 0:11:20.840 that overblown. I'm curious to hear your take. Is that 0:11:21.000 --> 0:11:25.400 just like a nihilistic take from young people who aren't 0:11:25.400 --> 0:11:26.839 sure that they want to have kids, or do you 0:11:26.880 --> 0:11:28.800 feel like having a kid? No, it is kind of 0:11:28.840 --> 0:11:31.320 like a success symbol at this point because you got 0:11:31.320 --> 0:11:32.320 to have the money to be able to pay for 0:11:32.320 --> 0:11:32.720 that baby. 0:11:33.679 --> 0:11:36.600 Yes or no, I will say there's definitely systemic issues. 0:11:37.080 --> 0:11:40.000 For example, daycare is very, very expensive, and you have 0:11:40.040 --> 0:11:42.560 to be very strategic about it. I mean, we can't 0:11:42.559 --> 0:11:45.120 talk about having kids without talking about daycare. But the 0:11:45.160 --> 0:11:47.480 thing is, what people don't realize is that daycare is 0:11:47.559 --> 0:11:50.120 not a forever cost. But when you're a parent for 0:11:50.160 --> 0:11:51.920 the first time, it scares you when you get that 0:11:51.960 --> 0:11:54.439 big bill and you were thinking, oh my god, I'm like, 0:11:54.559 --> 0:11:56.120 this is like the cost of a mortgage if I 0:11:56.120 --> 0:11:57.640 have multiple kids, and how am I going to be 0:11:57.640 --> 0:11:59.960 able to afford this? And you're thinking about this forever? 0:12:00.360 --> 0:12:03.040 But really, daycare is for five years until they go 0:12:03.080 --> 0:12:05.880 to public school. They go to kindergarten, and it's also 0:12:05.960 --> 0:12:09.480 graduated in that as your kid gets older at different 0:12:09.480 --> 0:12:12.520 stages in their life, it becomes less expensive. So, for example, 0:12:12.679 --> 0:12:15.800 from zero to eighteen months because the caregiver ratio. You 0:12:15.880 --> 0:12:20.680 have to have a higher number of caregivers per kid 0:12:20.800 --> 0:12:23.640 because they're much younger and they have higher needs. It's 0:12:23.679 --> 0:12:25.760 more expensive in the beginning, and it kind of levels 0:12:25.760 --> 0:12:28.040 off later on because then you don't need as many 0:12:28.080 --> 0:12:30.640 caregivers per child. So when you get to the age 0:12:30.640 --> 0:12:32.760 of two and a half, for our kid, it's like 0:12:32.920 --> 0:12:36.480 the ratio drops from four kids per one caregiver to 0:12:36.640 --> 0:12:39.440 six or eight kids per one caregivers. That makes it 0:12:39.480 --> 0:12:42.320 more less expensive for centers to run, and then it 0:12:42.360 --> 0:12:44.720 reduces your cost. So there's like a scale for the 0:12:44.800 --> 0:12:47.360 cost that is not obvious when you first look into 0:12:47.400 --> 0:12:51.839 daycare costs. There's also hybrid options for childcare. That's something 0:12:51.840 --> 0:12:53.800 that people can look into. So for example, one of 0:12:53.840 --> 0:12:56.240 the things that we used is a co working space 0:12:56.600 --> 0:12:59.480 that is combined with daycare. And this was not really 0:12:59.480 --> 0:13:03.240 that popular at all until the pandemic. So pandemic created 0:13:03.280 --> 0:13:07.680 a lot of intuitive, like new ways for childcare and 0:13:07.720 --> 0:13:10.800 to take care of kids that didn't exist before. So 0:13:10.840 --> 0:13:13.320 this one is good for people who have more of 0:13:13.360 --> 0:13:16.240 a like flexible work schedule in which they don't have 0:13:16.240 --> 0:13:18.320 to pay for an entire year. They can just pay 0:13:18.320 --> 0:13:20.679 for childcare whenever they need it. So for example, if 0:13:20.679 --> 0:13:24.280 you're a creator, like an influencer or something like that, 0:13:24.320 --> 0:13:27.320 who has chunks of time, I need a month in 0:13:27.320 --> 0:13:28.840 which I need childcare, and then I can take a 0:13:28.840 --> 0:13:31.120 month off and then like a few days here a week. 0:13:31.280 --> 0:13:33.839 So lets you customize and choose how much you want 0:13:33.840 --> 0:13:36.640 to pay per hour rather than the entire year. And 0:13:36.679 --> 0:13:40.160 then in addition to that, geographic arbitrage has also opened 0:13:40.200 --> 0:13:44.880 up ways to basically do world schooling with kids. One 0:13:44.920 --> 0:13:46.720 of the things we did was we traveled in Spain 0:13:46.760 --> 0:13:49.120 for three months and we found daycare for our sun 0:13:49.720 --> 0:13:53.400 and the cost was significantly lower, which kind of blew 0:13:53.400 --> 0:13:56.319 my mind because the average cost in the States per 0:13:56.360 --> 0:13:59.280 day for childcare is about eighty US dollars per day. 0:14:00.080 --> 0:14:03.320 We looked in Spain it was thirty six US dollars 0:14:03.360 --> 0:14:05.600 per day. I actually thought that was a typo at first, 0:14:05.600 --> 0:14:08.080 because I said, you mean thirty six per hour, and 0:14:08.080 --> 0:14:10.840 then they said, no, the entire day and includes food. 0:14:11.160 --> 0:14:14.079 And then they have they have chefs on site, they 0:14:14.120 --> 0:14:15.800 have a doctor, they have a nurse, they have a 0:14:15.880 --> 0:14:19.960 childs psychiatrist. And I was just like, what, why are 0:14:19.960 --> 0:14:21.880 we paying so much? Money in North America, and this 0:14:22.000 --> 0:14:24.840 is Spain. Like it's not Mexico, it's not Thailand, right, 0:14:24.840 --> 0:14:25.560 it's Spain. 0:14:26.520 --> 0:14:26.960 Right there. 0:14:27.280 --> 0:14:30.080 Yeah, I was just a it's a British run international 0:14:30.160 --> 0:14:36.440 daycare in Valencia. So there's different ways to combine, like 0:14:36.560 --> 0:14:40.040 hybrid solutions for childcare that didn't exist before. And even 0:14:40.080 --> 0:14:42.760 if you don't have the flexibility in your job and 0:14:42.800 --> 0:14:46.720 you're just really scared about this childcare cost, for people 0:14:46.720 --> 0:14:48.880 who are thinking about having kids, know that it is 0:14:48.920 --> 0:14:51.640 not a forever cost and it is a scale depending 0:14:51.680 --> 0:14:54.400 on how old your child is. As they need less 0:14:54.440 --> 0:14:57.400 care because they become more independent, the ratios get better 0:14:57.400 --> 0:14:58.560 and it becomes less expensive. 0:14:59.000 --> 0:15:01.000 Yeah, So to go back to original question, you know 0:15:01.120 --> 0:15:03.600 this this is uh, it absolutely is like a trope 0:15:03.600 --> 0:15:06.600 that like I haven't heard so much that children are 0:15:06.600 --> 0:15:08.800 like a success symbol or anything like that, but I 0:15:08.840 --> 0:15:10.720 definitely do hear a lot of like I can better 0:15:10.760 --> 0:15:13.640 take care of myself. They're like, there's no way I 0:15:13.640 --> 0:15:14.560 can afford to have kids. 0:15:14.640 --> 0:15:14.960 Yeah. 0:15:15.000 --> 0:15:19.360 So, like it's like the income instability that that we 0:15:19.400 --> 0:15:21.800 are facing now is much much worse than than it 0:15:21.880 --> 0:15:23.520 used to be when we were you know, when we 0:15:23.520 --> 0:15:27.360 were graduating and looking for jobs. Now AI is kind 0:15:27.360 --> 0:15:30.000 of like now there's so much like there's so much 0:15:30.040 --> 0:15:32.400 flux in all these different industries, and there's so much 0:15:33.520 --> 0:15:36.440 like change that's happening in which people are people and 0:15:36.520 --> 0:15:39.680 in entire industries are shedding jobs like crazy that people 0:15:39.720 --> 0:15:41.680 are rightfully asking, I can't, like, how can I afford 0:15:41.680 --> 0:15:45.240 to have kids if we if we can't, if we 0:15:45.240 --> 0:15:47.240 can't depend on our jobs, which is you know, kind 0:15:47.240 --> 0:15:49.320 of why we wrote this book because we wanted to show, hey, 0:15:49.320 --> 0:15:51.240 there are knobs that you can turn, daycare being one 0:15:51.240 --> 0:15:52.800 of the one of the most important ones. 0:15:53.040 --> 0:15:54.960 One of the other knobs you highlight in the book 0:15:55.160 --> 0:15:58.080 is the when it comes to the space we live 0:15:58.120 --> 0:16:01.280 in and people assume having got to start looking for 0:16:01.320 --> 0:16:05.680 that upgraded apartment, you know, and you guys have stayed 0:16:05.720 --> 0:16:08.360 in a one bedroom apartment, right, is there just is 0:16:08.400 --> 0:16:12.160 there too much pressure to upgrade living conditions, up increase 0:16:12.160 --> 0:16:14.600 your home size, which adds a lot of cost to 0:16:14.640 --> 0:16:17.280 the monthly budget. I mean, that's usually the number one 0:16:17.320 --> 0:16:19.360 line on them in people's in people's budget. And if 0:16:19.400 --> 0:16:22.640 you can keep that smaller for longer, that's a good thing. 0:16:22.720 --> 0:16:24.520 Or people just feeling the pressure to upgrade even though 0:16:24.520 --> 0:16:27.640 they don't need to, Like having a baby doesn't necessitate. 0:16:27.120 --> 0:16:29.400 That, oh yeah when people have when as soon as 0:16:29.400 --> 0:16:32.000 people get pregnant, they start like shopping for a home, right, 0:16:32.040 --> 0:16:33.600 that kind of thing, and then they're going to go, well, 0:16:33.640 --> 0:16:36.200 I can't even rent anymore because you know, like that's 0:16:36.800 --> 0:16:38.360 so we were so we were living in a one 0:16:38.400 --> 0:16:40.600 bedroom apartment for the first two years of his life. 0:16:40.640 --> 0:16:43.880 We now upgraded to a three bedroom apartment. 0:16:44.000 --> 0:16:46.640 But we're still renting, right, I mean, like it's like 0:16:47.560 --> 0:16:50.040 there is a huge pressure to like buy once you 0:16:50.120 --> 0:16:53.320 become a once you become a parent, because there's this 0:16:53.880 --> 0:16:56.520 you know, siren song of like stability and you need, 0:16:56.680 --> 0:16:58.200 you know, the kids need a stable home and that 0:16:58.240 --> 0:17:00.400 kind of stuff, and renting as seen as an inherently 0:17:00.480 --> 0:17:05.520 unstable But what we what we've discovered is that if 0:17:05.520 --> 0:17:07.600 you're a strategic about the type of places that you rent, 0:17:09.440 --> 0:17:11.600 that can be just as stable or sometimes even more 0:17:11.600 --> 0:17:12.920 stable than a home that you buy. 0:17:13.320 --> 0:17:15.120 Yeah, and I think it makes sense to run the math, 0:17:15.200 --> 0:17:17.119 like it might make sense if you have enough kids 0:17:17.160 --> 0:17:21.440 that like buying is the correct solution, but it's it's 0:17:21.440 --> 0:17:23.760 better to actually do the math rather than just immediately 0:17:23.800 --> 0:17:26.199 assume I have a family, therefore I must have I 0:17:26.240 --> 0:17:29.280 must buy a house therefore to give them stability. Otherwise 0:17:29.280 --> 0:17:31.800 I'm a bad parent. So it's again that emotional pull 0:17:31.920 --> 0:17:34.359 of like you know comes from a right place, but 0:17:34.400 --> 0:17:36.840 it doesn't necessarily mean that's the best for your family. 0:17:36.880 --> 0:17:39.160 You need to stop in a way. And also people 0:17:39.200 --> 0:17:41.879 don't realize that in the very first two years of life, 0:17:41.920 --> 0:17:43.639 your kid does not need that much space at all, 0:17:43.680 --> 0:17:45.959 Like they're just a blog. They don't really take up 0:17:45.960 --> 0:17:48.639 that much space. And a lot of the times the 0:17:49.359 --> 0:17:53.000 recommendation is to co room, like not co sleep, but 0:17:53.080 --> 0:17:57.359 cod room for the first year because it's safer to 0:17:57.480 --> 0:18:00.840 avoid sudden infant death syndrome, so that you can actually 0:18:00.880 --> 0:18:02.959 watch for them at nighttime and take care of them. 0:18:03.560 --> 0:18:05.480 For me, I was breastfeeding, so it made it a 0:18:05.520 --> 0:18:07.440 lot easier that we were in the same room. If 0:18:07.440 --> 0:18:09.440 I had multiple rooms in the beginning, it wouldn't have 0:18:09.440 --> 0:18:11.679 many difference because I would have just been in his 0:18:11.800 --> 0:18:15.040 room breastfeeding him and at nighttime like sleeping next to 0:18:15.119 --> 0:18:18.399 him without being in the same bed. So there's a 0:18:18.440 --> 0:18:21.080 lot of nuance to that. When people are like, oh, 0:18:21.080 --> 0:18:23.440