WEBVTT - No Prenup, No Wedding with Kelly Bensimon

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<v Speaker 1>If you are one of the lucky ones who got

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<v Speaker 1>loved your relationship marriage right the first time, then this

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<v Speaker 1>show ain't for you. Welcome to I Do Part two,

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<v Speaker 1>where your hosts today have said I do eight times

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<v Speaker 1>between the three of us.

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<v Speaker 2>Eight.

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<v Speaker 1>How was that for an intro? Janna Kramer, Listen, j I.

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<v Speaker 3>Feel very targeted and you're not.

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<v Speaker 4>You should just feel seen, Jenny, thank.

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<v Speaker 1>You because on this end down here with TJ Holmes, hello,

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<v Speaker 1>and Amy Robot four I dos down here as well,

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<v Speaker 1>and a fifth in the making. We should argue on

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<v Speaker 1>this end possibly, So yes, I'm not targeting Rush right,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not targeting, but welcome everybody. So Jana, we have

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<v Speaker 1>to say, is so good to have you in studio.

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<v Speaker 1>Jena is here with us in New York.

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<v Speaker 3>I love New York, you guys. This is such a

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<v Speaker 3>fun city. It's so great. And here with the beautiful Kelly.

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<v Speaker 3>I mean, this is this is awesome.

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<v Speaker 5>Yes, we have what we should mention. We have the

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<v Speaker 5>amazing Kelly ben Simone. Right, did I say your name correctly?

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<v Speaker 1>All right?

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<v Speaker 5>Kelly ben Simone is in the house here and she

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<v Speaker 5>is going to be We mentioned this in the first

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<v Speaker 5>episode one of our celebrity mentors.

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<v Speaker 4>Are you prepared to mentor us, Kelly?

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<v Speaker 2>I hope so. I'm working on it one day at

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<v Speaker 2>a time.

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<v Speaker 1>But Kelly, people coming to you for relationship advice more

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<v Speaker 1>so now than they used to.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, in the past month and a half, I've

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<v Speaker 2>become like the relationship group. Wow, everybody's asking me for advice,

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<v Speaker 2>which has been really, really sweet. But it's also like

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<v Speaker 2>bittersweet because I'm just like I hope I say the

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<v Speaker 2>right thing.

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<v Speaker 5>Well, well, you always say the right thing in the

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<v Speaker 5>right moment because it's authentic. And I think at some

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<v Speaker 5>point we were talking about that authenticity is a big

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<v Speaker 5>part of reality TV and sometimes it's not. But You've

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<v Speaker 5>always been the one who speaks her mind always, And

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<v Speaker 5>for those who need an introduction, I don't think many

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<v Speaker 5>people do. But you obviously hopefully remember Kelly from The

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<v Speaker 5>Real Housewives of New York and Ultimate Girls Trip and

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<v Speaker 5>recently making headlines for ending a wedding to be four

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<v Speaker 5>days before the nuptials were set to actually take place,

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<v Speaker 5>all because your fiance wouldn't sign a prenum. Is that

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<v Speaker 5>the only reason why the wedding was.

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<v Speaker 2>Called the only reason.

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<v Speaker 3>How long are you guys actually together because at the

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<v Speaker 3>first time, the first thing that I read, because well

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<v Speaker 3>I thought, I was like, wow, that's so powerful and

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<v Speaker 3>that's you know, like more power to her. But then

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<v Speaker 3>I was also like, that makes me sad for her

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<v Speaker 3>because how long was the relationship? Like that must have

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<v Speaker 3>been really hard to part from that.

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<v Speaker 2>So yeah, I mean we were together for over a

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<v Speaker 2>year and a half and I you know, everyone's like,

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<v Speaker 2>you're a runaway bride. I actually ran to myself. You know.

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<v Speaker 2>It was a very crowded, messy environment on his part

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<v Speaker 2>with ex wives and all these kids, and I love children,

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<v Speaker 2>but it was just like very, very, very messy, and

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<v Speaker 2>I just couldn't handle all of that. You know, I'm

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<v Speaker 2>very neat my girls. I raised my girls on my own.

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<v Speaker 2>I provided for them, educated them, like I'm like the

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<v Speaker 2>mama bear of all mama bears. And to see like

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<v Speaker 2>all this chaos all the time was just like not

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<v Speaker 2>for me. Coupled with the fact that you know, I'm

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<v Speaker 2>the daughter of a lawyer and if I'm going to

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<v Speaker 2>get married again, I mean I've been single for so long,

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<v Speaker 2>not because I am like single, like you know, someone

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<v Speaker 2>like they're like, well, you're single, I'm like, well, I'm

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<v Speaker 2>not like single, like out there like, oh my god,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm single. I'm single, introduced me, introduced me. I'm just

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<v Speaker 2>not married.

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<v Speaker 4>You know, there's the difference.

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<v Speaker 2>There is a total difference.

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<v Speaker 5>Your divorced, your your first divorce, your only divorce. Correct

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<v Speaker 5>was back in two thousand and seven.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, you have been like a mediator.

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<v Speaker 5>You know.

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<v Speaker 3>It was like and was there a prenup obviously in place?

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<v Speaker 2>Then no, there wasn't. But it was like a mediator.

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<v Speaker 2>But it was also different. I was young and you

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<v Speaker 2>know he I was young and made starting to make money.

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<v Speaker 2>He was you know, older and starting to make money,

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<v Speaker 2>and so we were like we were really building, you know.

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<v Speaker 2>I helped him build his career. And it was just

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<v Speaker 2>a different environment. It was a different time too. You know,

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<v Speaker 2>two thousand and seven, people weren't like, get a prenup,

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<v Speaker 2>take care of yourself. You know, women weren't like, oh,

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<v Speaker 2>I need to watch out for my finances. You know,

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<v Speaker 2>it was a different time. I mean people didn't even

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<v Speaker 2>talk about really about marriage. When I remember going on

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<v Speaker 2>when I was first on Housewives, and you know, I

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<v Speaker 2>was like, I'm a single parent, and they were like, oh,

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<v Speaker 2>so that we got one of those in the room. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>it was kind of like I had like leprosy or something.

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<v Speaker 2>You know. I was like, I'm just single, Like I

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<v Speaker 2>just raising my kids on my own. And I was,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, also young when I got married, but just

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<v Speaker 2>it was just a different time. Now it's like people

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<v Speaker 2>are like, I'm single, I'm loving life, and back then

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<v Speaker 2>it wasn't really perceived that way.

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<v Speaker 3>So can I ask kind of an insensitive question?

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<v Speaker 2>You can?

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<v Speaker 4>I think, push through it.

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<v Speaker 1>You'll make it.

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<v Speaker 3>Just get through it because I don't want to sound

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<v Speaker 3>I don't want to put him in a bad light.

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<v Speaker 3>But does he not have a lot of money?

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<v Speaker 4>I don't.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, I don't really know what his money situation is,

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<v Speaker 2>which is also a bad thing. You should kind of know

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<v Speaker 2>what the finances are of the family finances. I just

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<v Speaker 2>knew that I have two children. I've worked really, really hard.

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<v Speaker 2>I have a lot of earning potential, and I want

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<v Speaker 2>to make sure that my girls are protected for the

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<v Speaker 2>rest of their lives. I mean, that's why I'm making money.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm not making money so I can go to tom Ford.

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<v Speaker 2>Although I do love tom.

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<v Speaker 3>Ford and it with his fans Like me, we're in

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<v Speaker 3>New York.

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<v Speaker 2>People are like, oh my god, they're just spending money

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<v Speaker 2>like crazy. Well that's not really how it is. Like,

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<v Speaker 2>I just want to make sure that my girls are

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<v Speaker 2>obviously educated and have a good you know framework, but

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<v Speaker 2>I just want to like ensure that they can do

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<v Speaker 2>whatever they want.

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<v Speaker 3>And he didn't want to sign it because he what

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<v Speaker 3>was his reasoning for not signing. He just said no,

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<v Speaker 3>just flat out no.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah. He was like, we're not doing this. I'm like,

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<v Speaker 2>we're doing what So we're doing We're going to combine everything.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm like, wait, no, no, no, no, we're not combining anything.

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<v Speaker 2>There's like, that's not happening.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, well I know, O Kelly, a lot of the

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<v Speaker 1>headlines like that to write about that didn't get married

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<v Speaker 1>or marriage off because of a pre nup, But clearly

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<v Speaker 1>there was a lot more going on than the pre nup.

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<v Speaker 1>That might have been the straw that broke the camel's back. Yes,

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<v Speaker 1>but you will would you sare to say, now you

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<v Speaker 1>all shouldn't have gotten married.

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<v Speaker 2>No, And I touched on that. I just was say,

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<v Speaker 2>with the messiness and the being crowded, it was just

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<v Speaker 2>too much. It was just you know, I have a

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<v Speaker 2>you know, I have two girls, and I have a

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<v Speaker 2>big life, and you know, just with all of the

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<v Speaker 2>messy it was just too much. It's just a lot,

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<v Speaker 2>and like some people have the bandwidth for that. But like,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, I travel I work in five states. I'm

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<v Speaker 2>traveling a lot and all these you know, different shows

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<v Speaker 2>and trying to just to have a good time with

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<v Speaker 2>my life. Now that my girls are you know, educated

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<v Speaker 2>at jobs and are feeling good about themselves, like I

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<v Speaker 2>feel like I'm like, oh my god, I'm like, you know,

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<v Speaker 2>eighteen again, Like world's my oyster, Like, let's go for it.

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<v Speaker 2>What can I do now? Like where before I was

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<v Speaker 2>more like whatever was making money with the things that

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<v Speaker 2>I would just be laser focused on. And now I'm

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<v Speaker 2>just very excited about you know, new opportunities. And I

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<v Speaker 2>think that's something you know that we're not seeing that

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<v Speaker 2>much of, you know, with women in their fifties.

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<v Speaker 4>Yep, you know, I hear you.

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<v Speaker 3>What are y'all thoughts on prenups?

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<v Speaker 5>You know, I think before it's it's nice to be

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<v Speaker 5>in a position where you need one. You know, I

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<v Speaker 5>too got married young the first time, at twenty three,

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<v Speaker 5>and even when I got married again, in my mid thirties,

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<v Speaker 5>there wasn't a lot to speak of, so it wasn't

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<v Speaker 5>even a consideration. But once you I am too, a

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<v Speaker 5>woman in her fifties with two daughters who rely on

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<v Speaker 5>me solely for their you know, financial support. I've never

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<v Speaker 5>considered a prenup before, and I don't know how I

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<v Speaker 5>feel about it now. I know that I have created

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<v Speaker 5>a trust after having learned some lessons during one of

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<v Speaker 5>my divorces, and so I've taken that action and that

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<v Speaker 5>has left me feeling more protected for my daughters. And

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<v Speaker 5>you know, everyone's got different avenues, but I learned the

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<v Speaker 5>hard way that you do need to keep that in

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<v Speaker 5>mind because, as the saying goes, you don't know who

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<v Speaker 5>someone is until you divorce them.

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<v Speaker 2>So I'm not a lawyer. I'm not trying to, you know,

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<v Speaker 2>tell people about the law. But I'm just you know,

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<v Speaker 2>explaining what I know. And you know, it's either you

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<v Speaker 2>either have a trust or a pre nup. So you know,

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<v Speaker 2>if you're going to go into a relationship and you

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<v Speaker 2>want to say to the person, Okay, you know we're

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<v Speaker 2>going to get married. I mean at the end of

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<v Speaker 2>the day, like it's a transaction. It's always been a transaction,

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<v Speaker 2>like it's not some new thing. People are like, no, no,

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<v Speaker 2>it's for love. Yes it is. But when you're sharing finances,

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<v Speaker 2>whether it's one dollar or ten dollars, that's your money

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<v Speaker 2>that you made, and the person that you're with should

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<v Speaker 2>be excited about that saying like that's a great I mean,

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<v Speaker 2>if he had said that's a really good idea, I

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<v Speaker 2>really appreciate you taking care of yourself and putting, you know,

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<v Speaker 2>putting your family first, I probably would have married him,

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<v Speaker 2>even though everything was messy, and even though there was

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<v Speaker 2>just so much there was, it was so crowded, I

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<v Speaker 2>probably would have been like, you know what, I really

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<v Speaker 2>appreciate that. But because because of that really rubbed me

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<v Speaker 2>the wrong.

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<v Speaker 5>Way, I was just gonna say, that's about I think

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<v Speaker 5>so much of I can only speak for women. We

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<v Speaker 5>want to be supported, and sometimes that's getting the support

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<v Speaker 5>to know that we can support ourselves. And if that's

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<v Speaker 5>not celebrated by the partner or the person who you

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<v Speaker 5>want to spend the rest of your life with, that

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<v Speaker 5>is a red flag.

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<v Speaker 3>Well, and yeah, I will say this too. A lot

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<v Speaker 3>of and I don't know if this is just now,

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<v Speaker 3>but at least five girls that I've spoken to about prenups,

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<v Speaker 3>it was the guy that didn't want to sign the prenup.

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<v Speaker 3>It was always the guy having an issue with it, like,

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<v Speaker 3>why do you want me to sign that? And you

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<v Speaker 3>know my girlfriend who was you know, she was my

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<v Speaker 3>lash tech, she was just like, he won't sign it.

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<v Speaker 3>And it's frustrating me that he's just like, I've built

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<v Speaker 3>this business, I've done this, and there's and I have

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<v Speaker 3>multiple examples of it's always the guy wrapping up against it.

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<v Speaker 3>So I'm curious TJ to direct it towards you, like,

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<v Speaker 3>what do you think that is with the man to not?

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<v Speaker 1>I was about to ask you, is there an ice

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<v Speaker 1>and all those friends? Was there some kind of financial

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<v Speaker 1>imbalance or just maybe.

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<v Speaker 3>Some are a few are equal in pay and then

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<v Speaker 3>the others the women? Do you have more money?

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<v Speaker 1>Did you ever? And I'm gonna don't you dare try

0:10:32.120 --> 0:10:32.440
<v Speaker 1>and put this.

0:10:32.440 --> 0:10:33.120
<v Speaker 4>Back on promise.

0:10:33.120 --> 0:10:38.880
<v Speaker 1>I'm going to answer. I promised you did you ever

0:10:38.960 --> 0:10:40.520
<v Speaker 1>do one? Did you ever use a prenup?

0:10:41.320 --> 0:10:42.960
<v Speaker 3>I asked you first, Okay, that's.

0:10:42.880 --> 0:10:45.040
<v Speaker 1>Fine, I never have my answer, but and then I

0:10:45.120 --> 0:10:46.240
<v Speaker 1>have an opinion on them as well.

0:10:46.640 --> 0:10:47.840
<v Speaker 4>But have you ever knew she came.

0:10:48.280 --> 0:10:50.280
<v Speaker 3>She came to you before you guys get married, and

0:10:50.360 --> 0:10:52.719
<v Speaker 3>she says, I want a prenup? Would you sign it?

0:10:52.840 --> 0:10:54.480
<v Speaker 1>I'll sign whatever she wants me to sign if it

0:10:54.520 --> 0:10:57.319
<v Speaker 1>means I can marry her. Oh, I completely pulled that

0:10:57.400 --> 0:10:57.920
<v Speaker 1>out of my ass.

0:10:58.000 --> 0:11:05.000
<v Speaker 4>I didn't, but it was just documented no, no, But my.

0:11:05.480 --> 0:11:07.599
<v Speaker 1>Feeling on it, and this might sound crazy to you, O,

0:11:07.720 --> 0:11:12.280
<v Speaker 1>Kelly Jenna, is that there's something that's so unromantic about it.

0:11:12.480 --> 0:11:16.040
<v Speaker 1>It's something that does make it feel like a business transaction.

0:11:16.600 --> 0:11:19.360
<v Speaker 1>I get one hundred percent get it, but it just

0:11:19.400 --> 0:11:22.400
<v Speaker 1>feels icky to me. So I have always been on

0:11:22.559 --> 0:11:25.600
<v Speaker 1>the higher end or the one who makes more money

0:11:25.600 --> 0:11:28.560
<v Speaker 1>in my relationships and marriages, but it never crossed my mind.

0:11:28.440 --> 0:11:28.719
<v Speaker 3>To do so.

0:11:29.280 --> 0:11:32.720
<v Speaker 1>So then you're saying, so.

0:11:32.840 --> 0:11:34.839
<v Speaker 2>You either do the trust and if you don't have

0:11:34.920 --> 0:11:37.199
<v Speaker 2>a trust in place, then you can you should do

0:11:37.240 --> 0:11:40.480
<v Speaker 2>a prenup and you not should you can.

0:11:51.080 --> 0:11:54.560
<v Speaker 3>In my last marriage to my husband of almost seven years,

0:11:56.200 --> 0:11:58.719
<v Speaker 3>I did not have him sign a prenup to me.

0:11:58.840 --> 0:12:00.480
<v Speaker 3>It was like, we are getting this, this is my

0:12:00.600 --> 0:12:05.400
<v Speaker 3>one forever and we're getting married. And when he cheated

0:12:05.520 --> 0:12:08.600
<v Speaker 3>the first round of affairs, I when he was in rehab,

0:12:08.640 --> 0:12:11.360
<v Speaker 3>I made him sign a post up, but that did

0:12:11.440 --> 0:12:13.360
<v Speaker 3>not hold up in court. It was not going to

0:12:13.400 --> 0:12:15.640
<v Speaker 3>hold up in court. My lawyer had said when I

0:12:15.800 --> 0:12:19.600
<v Speaker 3>finally divorced him that post ups don't hold up as

0:12:19.640 --> 0:12:23.640
<v Speaker 3>well as prenups, and that he and he told me

0:12:23.720 --> 0:12:25.199
<v Speaker 3>he was going to fight the post up. And so

0:12:25.280 --> 0:12:27.400
<v Speaker 3>that's when I just went into my own you know,

0:12:27.840 --> 0:12:29.959
<v Speaker 3>brain of Excel, Google sheets of Okay, what I think

0:12:30.080 --> 0:12:32.240
<v Speaker 3>is fair and what is you know, without trying to

0:12:32.280 --> 0:12:35.680
<v Speaker 3>take because it was I earned most of the money

0:12:35.720 --> 0:12:40.719
<v Speaker 3>in that relationship. So now in this new relationship, it

0:12:40.880 --> 0:12:43.200
<v Speaker 3>was it was a really hard conversation to have because

0:12:43.200 --> 0:12:45.719
<v Speaker 3>I have my entire team of people and lawyers and

0:12:45.800 --> 0:12:49.199
<v Speaker 3>business managers and looking out for me, and my lawyer

0:12:49.320 --> 0:12:52.079
<v Speaker 3>was like, this is like getting health insurance, and I'm like,

0:12:52.640 --> 0:12:54.480
<v Speaker 3>I get that piece of it. I was like, but

0:12:54.600 --> 0:12:56.880
<v Speaker 3>I'm like, I'm struggling with that. He's like, well, why

0:12:56.920 --> 0:12:59.240
<v Speaker 3>wouldn't you have health insurance for your life? This is

0:12:59.280 --> 0:13:00.760
<v Speaker 3>the same thing. I'm like, but it's not. I'm like,

0:13:00.840 --> 0:13:02.600
<v Speaker 3>he's the love of my life and I don't want

0:13:02.640 --> 0:13:04.680
<v Speaker 3>to have a pre nap. I don't I go Having

0:13:04.800 --> 0:13:06.400
<v Speaker 3>said that. Then I look at the other side. I

0:13:06.559 --> 0:13:09.040
<v Speaker 3>realized how much I lost almost half of my money

0:13:09.080 --> 0:13:12.040
<v Speaker 3>in my last divorce, money that I worked really hard for.

0:13:12.440 --> 0:13:14.520
<v Speaker 3>And I come from that single mom of there heart.

0:13:14.640 --> 0:13:15.680
<v Speaker 3>My mom was a single mom.

0:13:16.440 --> 0:13:17.199
<v Speaker 4>This is not for me.

0:13:17.440 --> 0:13:19.320
<v Speaker 3>None of that money is for me. It's for my children,

0:13:19.400 --> 0:13:21.000
<v Speaker 3>and so if I just want to protect that, and

0:13:21.080 --> 0:13:23.120
<v Speaker 3>I think when I had the conversation with my husband,

0:13:23.280 --> 0:13:26.120
<v Speaker 3>now you know, he was very much like you, it's

0:13:26.200 --> 0:13:29.199
<v Speaker 3>not what we're already going into this to not be together,

0:13:29.360 --> 0:13:31.400
<v Speaker 3>Like it doesn't feel romantic. It's like and I'm like,

0:13:31.520 --> 0:13:33.200
<v Speaker 3>I know, and I was like, I don't want it either,

0:13:33.360 --> 0:13:35.000
<v Speaker 3>like zero part of me wants it. And he's like,

0:13:35.400 --> 0:13:37.040
<v Speaker 3>I will sign it if you want me to sign it.

0:13:37.200 --> 0:13:39.640
<v Speaker 3>And you know, I'm not going to actually say what

0:13:39.760 --> 0:13:42.959
<v Speaker 3>the end decision was, but for for me, it was

0:13:43.080 --> 0:13:44.959
<v Speaker 3>a it was just a really tough conversation to have.

0:13:45.360 --> 0:13:48.760
<v Speaker 2>But isn't that so nice? Sorry, it's not so nice

0:13:48.800 --> 0:13:51.480
<v Speaker 2>though that he said, like if you want that like that.

0:13:52.200 --> 0:13:53.640
<v Speaker 3>At the end of the day, I think I needed

0:13:53.679 --> 0:13:55.679
<v Speaker 3>that piece and then whatever we ended up saying it

0:13:55.760 --> 0:13:56.560
<v Speaker 3>was the right.

0:13:56.679 --> 0:13:59.640
<v Speaker 2>And that was the other thing too, is that there

0:13:59.720 --> 0:14:03.080
<v Speaker 2>was no, there was no like gentle conversation about There

0:14:03.160 --> 0:14:05.400
<v Speaker 2>was no like, you know, I want you to be

0:14:05.640 --> 0:14:08.599
<v Speaker 2>happy and healthy and make sure that you're safe. And

0:14:08.720 --> 0:14:11.599
<v Speaker 2>I think that's one thing that is that, you know,

0:14:11.640 --> 0:14:13.920
<v Speaker 2>there's so many roles of being reversed. There's a lot

0:14:14.000 --> 0:14:16.640
<v Speaker 2>of women that are making a lot of money. And

0:14:18.200 --> 0:14:20.160
<v Speaker 2>you know, it's like when I when I was dating

0:14:20.360 --> 0:14:22.640
<v Speaker 2>before I met him, you know, a lot of guys

0:14:22.680 --> 0:14:24.680
<v Speaker 2>would be like, oh, you know, Kelly's going to take

0:14:24.720 --> 0:14:26.920
<v Speaker 2>care of this, and Kelly's doing this, and Kelly's doing that.

0:14:27.040 --> 0:14:30.080
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, why is Kelly doing everything? Like hello, you

0:14:30.160 --> 0:14:33.000
<v Speaker 2>can like you know, start doing things as well. And

0:14:35.080 --> 0:14:37.000
<v Speaker 2>you know, I just I just feel like there's nothing

0:14:37.080 --> 0:14:39.520
<v Speaker 2>wrong with making money, and there's nothing wrong with being

0:14:40.160 --> 0:14:42.920
<v Speaker 2>you know, supporting your family and putting your children first

0:14:43.080 --> 0:14:46.200
<v Speaker 2>and like wanting a nice life for yourself. There's nothing

0:14:46.200 --> 0:14:47.680
<v Speaker 2>wrong with that. And there's nothing wrong with wanting to

0:14:47.760 --> 0:14:51.400
<v Speaker 2>have a partner that's involved in that as well. Who's like, Hey,

0:14:51.480 --> 0:14:53.200
<v Speaker 2>you know what you're doing just a freak job.

0:14:53.280 --> 0:14:54.040
<v Speaker 4>I'm so proud of you.

0:14:54.160 --> 0:14:56.360
<v Speaker 1>Because Asten don't get why he would just he just said,

0:14:57.720 --> 0:15:01.440
<v Speaker 1>but he didn't just give you like a response, you say,

0:15:01.480 --> 0:15:03.040
<v Speaker 1>you just said no and moved on, is it? I mean,

0:15:03.080 --> 0:15:05.520
<v Speaker 1>what was the logic behind it? Am I missing? Oh?

0:15:05.600 --> 0:15:07.200
<v Speaker 4>I was going to ask that question. If you didn't

0:15:07.240 --> 0:15:08.880
<v Speaker 4>the same exact question, they had to.

0:15:08.880 --> 0:15:11.960
<v Speaker 1>Give you some reason why besides just no, I refuse.

0:15:12.320 --> 0:15:15.360
<v Speaker 2>Well, actually he said to me no, and then he

0:15:15.560 --> 0:15:18.280
<v Speaker 2>was like, I'm gonna have my lawyer go back, and

0:15:18.360 --> 0:15:19.200
<v Speaker 2>I'm just like no.

0:15:19.600 --> 0:15:21.600
<v Speaker 3>I was like, that's where it's so transire, that's where

0:15:21.600 --> 0:15:22.280
<v Speaker 3>it's gets so.

0:15:22.560 --> 0:15:23.960
<v Speaker 2>And I was like, no, no, no, We're not doing

0:15:24.040 --> 0:15:26.640
<v Speaker 2>this back and forth. It's like, this is it if

0:15:26.680 --> 0:15:30.000
<v Speaker 2>you want to be involved or not, and.

0:15:32.240 --> 0:15:33.080
<v Speaker 4>That's it. That was it.

0:15:33.800 --> 0:15:35.440
<v Speaker 2>Having done. He had it for a long time. It's

0:15:35.480 --> 0:15:36.800
<v Speaker 2>not like he had it like a day.

0:15:37.360 --> 0:15:39.240
<v Speaker 5>Well that I mean, I know, this is crazy. My

0:15:39.320 --> 0:15:41.040
<v Speaker 5>brain goes straight to a place where, you know, what

0:15:41.840 --> 0:15:43.480
<v Speaker 5>it all happened the way it was supposed to. Because

0:15:43.480 --> 0:15:46.600
<v Speaker 5>if he went to that place immediately with you asking

0:15:46.680 --> 0:15:49.680
<v Speaker 5>for a prenup before you're even even a married couple,

0:15:50.400 --> 0:15:52.160
<v Speaker 5>My mind goes to what that divorce would have been

0:15:52.240 --> 0:15:54.680
<v Speaker 5>like had it not worked out. Well, he said, you know,

0:15:54.840 --> 0:15:57.120
<v Speaker 5>conversation is that I'll take it to my lawyers. That's

0:15:57.200 --> 0:16:00.000
<v Speaker 5>the worst possible response when you haven't even gotten married.

0:16:00.400 --> 0:16:02.640
<v Speaker 2>Well, just like by you know, I mean, so we're

0:16:02.680 --> 0:16:05.920
<v Speaker 2>talking about like you know, would have, could have, should

0:16:06.240 --> 0:16:08.480
<v Speaker 2>like all these different things. But here's here's the here's

0:16:08.520 --> 0:16:11.000
<v Speaker 2>the good news. The good news is the law doesn't

0:16:11.080 --> 0:16:13.440
<v Speaker 2>care if you're madly in love or if you hate

0:16:13.480 --> 0:16:16.720
<v Speaker 2>each other. The law says you get a certain amount

0:16:16.720 --> 0:16:19.720
<v Speaker 2>of money regardless if you don't have a trust or

0:16:20.520 --> 0:16:24.960
<v Speaker 2>a prenup and place, so you know, you can be

0:16:25.120 --> 0:16:26.960
<v Speaker 2>loved as much as you want. And then what something

0:16:27.040 --> 0:16:30.120
<v Speaker 2>happens good, bad or ugly, and all of a sudden,

0:16:30.520 --> 0:16:33.960
<v Speaker 2>like all that money you've worked for on your the

0:16:34.040 --> 0:16:36.360
<v Speaker 2>male part or the female part is going to the

0:16:36.440 --> 0:16:39.040
<v Speaker 2>other person. Like just like you said, like you had

0:16:39.080 --> 0:16:40.960
<v Speaker 2>to give money to another person's like cheating on you.

0:16:41.120 --> 0:16:43.280
<v Speaker 2>I mean, how that doesn't make you feel you don't

0:16:43.360 --> 0:16:44.720
<v Speaker 2>like sleep at night and be like, oh my god,

0:16:44.720 --> 0:16:46.520
<v Speaker 2>I'm so warm and fuzzy because he cheated on me

0:16:47.000 --> 0:16:47.600
<v Speaker 2>so much money.

0:16:47.840 --> 0:16:50.160
<v Speaker 3>It's more so just and that is the only that

0:16:50.360 --> 0:16:53.440
<v Speaker 3>is the only piece that like causes still friction with

0:16:53.520 --> 0:16:55.240
<v Speaker 3>me and my exses because I pay him child support,

0:16:55.240 --> 0:16:56.480
<v Speaker 3>I have the kid seventy percent of the time, he

0:16:56.520 --> 0:16:58.600
<v Speaker 3>took almost half this of money. So it's like it's

0:16:58.640 --> 0:17:01.840
<v Speaker 3>frustrating to have that where I'm like, I worked my assa,

0:17:02.000 --> 0:17:04.439
<v Speaker 3>I came from nothing, like my mom worked three jobs.

0:17:04.480 --> 0:17:04.879
<v Speaker 4>I hadn't.

0:17:05.000 --> 0:17:08.320
<v Speaker 3>Like I'm the girl that's like the only saw negative

0:17:08.359 --> 0:17:10.320
<v Speaker 3>in her bank account. So now I'm I'm to a

0:17:10.400 --> 0:17:12.080
<v Speaker 3>fault too much of a horder in my bank account

0:17:12.119 --> 0:17:14.760
<v Speaker 3>now because I'm afraid of not and not being there,

0:17:14.920 --> 0:17:16.800
<v Speaker 3>not being able to support my kids in their sports.

0:17:16.840 --> 0:17:18.439
<v Speaker 3>Like I had to quit figure skatings my mom couldn't

0:17:18.440 --> 0:17:19.520
<v Speaker 3>forford it. I never want to have to tell my

0:17:19.600 --> 0:17:21.560
<v Speaker 3>kids you can't do a sport because mommy doesn't have

0:17:21.640 --> 0:17:25.000
<v Speaker 3>the money. So like I want to like make sure

0:17:25.040 --> 0:17:27.840
<v Speaker 3>they're protected. And so you know, like you said, when

0:17:27.880 --> 0:17:30.160
<v Speaker 3>you divorce someone like he even said, I won't take

0:17:30.200 --> 0:17:33.080
<v Speaker 3>your money, Well no, because when the divorce is happening,

0:17:33.160 --> 0:17:33.560
<v Speaker 3>they're going.

0:17:33.560 --> 0:17:35.359
<v Speaker 4>To go after it all a lot of scot chills.

0:17:36.400 --> 0:17:38.399
<v Speaker 3>You know that you're getting divorced for a reason. You

0:17:38.440 --> 0:17:40.240
<v Speaker 3>ain't friends anymore, you're not in love anymore.

0:17:40.520 --> 0:17:43.520
<v Speaker 5>And when everyone starts lawyering up, it just it goes

0:17:43.640 --> 0:17:48.120
<v Speaker 5>from you know, amicable divorce to very much the opposite

0:17:48.400 --> 0:17:48.919
<v Speaker 5>very quickly.

0:17:49.000 --> 0:17:51.160
<v Speaker 4>And I think that's part of the point.

0:17:50.960 --> 0:17:54.000
<v Speaker 5>Of this podcast, which is pretty cool, because we've all

0:17:54.359 --> 0:17:56.480
<v Speaker 5>lived a lot of life and we've all learned lessons

0:17:56.520 --> 0:17:58.399
<v Speaker 5>the hard way, and that's part of the goal is

0:17:58.480 --> 0:18:01.480
<v Speaker 5>to hopefully impart some of that with wisdom to listeners

0:18:01.560 --> 0:18:04.040
<v Speaker 5>to women out there who are looking for love and

0:18:04.160 --> 0:18:06.399
<v Speaker 5>have gone through some of these tough times where you

0:18:06.560 --> 0:18:09.080
<v Speaker 5>don't know what it's like until you've walked down that path.

0:18:10.000 --> 0:18:12.359
<v Speaker 2>I mean with my first with my first ex husband,

0:18:12.480 --> 0:18:15.960
<v Speaker 2>my only ex husband, you know, we had a mediator

0:18:16.240 --> 0:18:19.119
<v Speaker 2>and you know it's my you know, our accountant and

0:18:19.160 --> 0:18:21.680
<v Speaker 2>the mediator, and we went through everything and I just

0:18:21.760 --> 0:18:24.720
<v Speaker 2>made sure that my ex husband was safe and that

0:18:24.840 --> 0:18:28.719
<v Speaker 2>I was safe. And you know, it's like I come

0:18:28.760 --> 0:18:31.520
<v Speaker 2>from like good stock. I'm like, I want people to

0:18:31.760 --> 0:18:33.879
<v Speaker 2>feel good, Like I want them when they're around me

0:18:33.920 --> 0:18:35.880
<v Speaker 2>to feel good. I want them to like be able

0:18:35.920 --> 0:18:38.760
<v Speaker 2>to trust me. That's like super important for me and

0:18:39.640 --> 0:18:42.160
<v Speaker 2>my ex husband, you know. I mean I made sure

0:18:42.240 --> 0:18:45.360
<v Speaker 2>that he that we were both like in a good place.

0:18:45.800 --> 0:18:45.879
<v Speaker 4>And.

0:18:47.880 --> 0:18:50.040
<v Speaker 2>That was really important to me. And so to come

0:18:50.119 --> 0:18:53.360
<v Speaker 2>into a situation where I wasn't feeling good after I'm

0:18:53.400 --> 0:18:55.040
<v Speaker 2>the one that like tied the bow on for my

0:18:55.119 --> 0:18:57.359
<v Speaker 2>first husband, you know, my my only husband does.

0:18:57.720 --> 0:18:59.520
<v Speaker 4>First we were just getting caught up in all of

0:18:59.640 --> 0:19:00.000
<v Speaker 4>our lives.

0:19:00.080 --> 0:19:04.000
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, my first husband's second husband, eight husbands.

0:19:04.560 --> 0:19:08.080
<v Speaker 3>Did you consult with anyone with your decision to with

0:19:08.280 --> 0:19:11.000
<v Speaker 3>my lawyer? Yeah, with my lawyer, no friends or anything.

0:19:11.280 --> 0:19:13.119
<v Speaker 2>And I also we had just gone to Jamaica with

0:19:13.200 --> 0:19:15.119
<v Speaker 2>my girls and we were having and my girls were

0:19:15.200 --> 0:19:17.240
<v Speaker 2>not happy. My oldest was not happy, my youngest was

0:19:17.280 --> 0:19:19.000
<v Speaker 2>not happy, and I'm just like, what am I doing?

0:19:19.119 --> 0:19:21.879
<v Speaker 2>My kids are my kids that are like my everything

0:19:22.400 --> 0:19:25.159
<v Speaker 2>are not happy. And I've broken up with guys before

0:19:25.240 --> 0:19:26.880
<v Speaker 2>that I've been dating that. I was like, oh they're fun,

0:19:26.920 --> 0:19:28.720
<v Speaker 2>and my kids are like we hate them. I'm like, okay,

0:19:28.760 --> 0:19:31.359
<v Speaker 2>you're bye, good bye, You're done. So like they've always

0:19:31.440 --> 0:19:35.160
<v Speaker 2>been my priority, and they just weren't feeling good too.

0:19:35.359 --> 0:19:36.240
<v Speaker 2>They just weren't feeling it.

0:19:36.440 --> 0:19:38.080
<v Speaker 3>There was a lot, So where does that love go then,

0:19:38.119 --> 0:19:40.639
<v Speaker 3>because obviously you love this man, you know, like, is

0:19:40.680 --> 0:19:43.200
<v Speaker 3>there any regrets do you like, where do you place

0:19:43.280 --> 0:19:45.679
<v Speaker 3>this love? Or was it just an immediate turnoff that.

0:19:46.160 --> 0:19:48.200
<v Speaker 2>It was a turn off, But it was also just

0:19:48.400 --> 0:19:50.760
<v Speaker 2>like I just well, I mean, if to remember too,

0:19:50.840 --> 0:19:53.760
<v Speaker 2>it's like I had to move out, and the first

0:19:53.920 --> 0:19:57.800
<v Speaker 2>night I'm in my ex hus my daughter was staying

0:19:57.800 --> 0:20:00.159
<v Speaker 2>in my ex husband's apartment, and so I like no

0:20:00.240 --> 0:20:02.480
<v Speaker 2>place to go. So I'm like, okay, I'm gonna go

0:20:02.720 --> 0:20:05.320
<v Speaker 2>with my daughter into my ex husband's apartment and there

0:20:05.320 --> 0:20:07.520
<v Speaker 2>are all these like Sonny angels and then he's got

0:20:07.600 --> 0:20:10.080
<v Speaker 2>these like symbols, and I wake up and I'm like.

0:20:10.440 --> 0:20:12.119
<v Speaker 1>What is going on with my life?

0:20:12.400 --> 0:20:16.199
<v Speaker 2>Do you know what like very like little crazy figurines

0:20:16.280 --> 0:20:20.440
<v Speaker 2>that kids loved where they're like kind of oddly pornographic,

0:20:21.280 --> 0:20:23.600
<v Speaker 2>but for kids, they're weird. I don't know, they're not mind.

0:20:23.880 --> 0:20:26.160
<v Speaker 2>But anyway, I was just like, this is not my life,

0:20:26.359 --> 0:20:29.200
<v Speaker 2>like the sunny angels and this art, and I'm in

0:20:29.440 --> 0:20:31.240
<v Speaker 2>the bed with her and the dogs and.

0:20:31.280 --> 0:20:34.200
<v Speaker 3>I'm just like your ex husband that's the apartment.

0:20:34.240 --> 0:20:36.120
<v Speaker 2>I'm just like, I'm gonna like lose my mind.

0:20:36.240 --> 0:20:38.800
<v Speaker 5>You got to that place, Kelly, But how like how

0:20:38.880 --> 0:20:41.320
<v Speaker 5>much courage did it take? Or I'm just curious for

0:20:41.400 --> 0:20:44.240
<v Speaker 5>you to actually say I'm calling off the wedding.

0:20:44.320 --> 0:20:45.520
<v Speaker 4>What was that conversation?

0:20:45.840 --> 0:20:49.520
<v Speaker 5>Like obviously you knew this would be everywhere because it's

0:20:49.560 --> 0:20:54.479
<v Speaker 5>been such a public relationship. What went into the decision,

0:20:54.520 --> 0:20:56.359
<v Speaker 5>how much courage did it take, and.

0:20:57.760 --> 0:20:58.560
<v Speaker 4>How did it go down?

0:20:59.320 --> 0:21:02.560
<v Speaker 3>So I was getting a colonic. Those are great. I

0:21:02.640 --> 0:21:04.920
<v Speaker 3>used to have those in Los Angeles, have known a while.

0:21:05.240 --> 0:21:07.199
<v Speaker 3>They're so good. We're feeling in the world, but right

0:21:07.200 --> 0:21:08.200
<v Speaker 3>when we're stout to come out.

0:21:09.480 --> 0:21:10.560
<v Speaker 1>Where this is the time.

0:21:11.640 --> 0:21:16.240
<v Speaker 2>Chronics are amazing, so literally, I don't even know what

0:21:16.720 --> 0:21:19.280
<v Speaker 2>they're just like, they're just amazing. Anyone who has not

0:21:19.320 --> 0:21:20.560
<v Speaker 2>gotten a chlonic, I love them.

0:21:21.280 --> 0:21:23.800
<v Speaker 3>I feel so just like light energy.

0:21:23.960 --> 0:21:25.840
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I was feeling very stressed out and so I

0:21:25.920 --> 0:21:28.639
<v Speaker 2>got a colonic and I'm laying down and I was

0:21:28.680 --> 0:21:30.760
<v Speaker 2>on my phone, well I'm just getting a colonic, and

0:21:32.760 --> 0:21:36.080
<v Speaker 2>he said something to me along the lines of, you know,

0:21:36.280 --> 0:21:38.200
<v Speaker 2>you need to if you're going to cancel the wedding,

0:21:38.400 --> 0:21:41.240
<v Speaker 2>you have to do it now because there's a cancelation policy.

0:21:42.119 --> 0:21:42.800
<v Speaker 4>Oh my god.

0:21:43.200 --> 0:21:43.800
<v Speaker 1>He didn't say if.

0:21:43.760 --> 0:21:45.520
<v Speaker 2>You're going to cancel wedding. He's like, there's a cancelation

0:21:45.680 --> 0:21:49.760
<v Speaker 2>policy for things. And I was like, I'm sorry, what what? What?

0:21:49.920 --> 0:21:50.280
<v Speaker 2>I'm sorry?

0:21:50.359 --> 0:21:51.480
<v Speaker 4>What did I hear that?

0:21:51.880 --> 0:21:54.240
<v Speaker 2>Did you just text me? I didn't hear it. I

0:21:54.320 --> 0:21:55.879
<v Speaker 2>was reading it, I'm like, did I just do I

0:21:56.000 --> 0:21:59.000
<v Speaker 2>need my readers on? Did I just see a cancelation policy?

0:22:00.240 --> 0:22:01.240
<v Speaker 2>Just was like, we're done.

0:22:03.280 --> 0:22:05.399
<v Speaker 4>It happened over text where it was I saw it.

0:22:05.600 --> 0:22:07.600
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, And I called him and I was like, what

0:22:07.920 --> 0:22:09.480
<v Speaker 2>did you just do? First of all, are you talking

0:22:09.520 --> 0:22:11.560
<v Speaker 2>to people on my behalf? Like? Are you talking to

0:22:11.680 --> 0:22:14.919
<v Speaker 2>people that I know? Because that's not okay because if

0:22:14.960 --> 0:22:17.320
<v Speaker 2>anyone's going to break news, I'm going to break my

0:22:17.400 --> 0:22:21.760
<v Speaker 2>own news and listen, you know what. I think. He's

0:22:21.800 --> 0:22:25.719
<v Speaker 2>a really genuinely, very nice guy. He's just not my lobster.

0:22:26.320 --> 0:22:29.080
<v Speaker 2>He's not my lobster. And you know, I want like

0:22:29.240 --> 0:22:31.280
<v Speaker 2>someone that makes me feel good about myself. I want

0:22:31.320 --> 0:22:34.040
<v Speaker 2>someone that like pushes me to be the best version

0:22:34.080 --> 0:22:35.720
<v Speaker 2>of me. I don't want someone I don't want a

0:22:35.760 --> 0:22:39.800
<v Speaker 2>messy environment. I don't want someone like talking about cancelation policies.

0:22:39.800 --> 0:22:41.560
<v Speaker 2>I want people to be like, you know what, you

0:22:41.640 --> 0:22:43.640
<v Speaker 2>may love you so much, let's fight for this. Yeah,

0:22:44.119 --> 0:22:45.600
<v Speaker 2>you know I'm coming to get you.

0:22:49.480 --> 0:22:52.520
<v Speaker 4>It's the wrong that we all want come back and

0:22:52.600 --> 0:22:55.119
<v Speaker 4>they fight for you. It's hard almost.

0:22:56.840 --> 0:22:59.240
<v Speaker 3>We want to be able to write, are we canceling

0:22:59.280 --> 0:23:00.840
<v Speaker 3>this or not, and then have you guys say no,

0:23:00.960 --> 0:23:02.240
<v Speaker 3>I love you so much, I want to do this.

0:23:02.400 --> 0:23:04.960
<v Speaker 4>Like that will always chool.

0:23:05.280 --> 0:23:08.160
<v Speaker 5>If he had said, you know what, money doesn't matter,

0:23:08.320 --> 0:23:09.800
<v Speaker 5>I just want to be with you no matter what,

0:23:10.200 --> 0:23:12.919
<v Speaker 5>let's figure this out, you would have policy.

0:23:13.040 --> 0:23:15.639
<v Speaker 3>I was like, I'm sorry, what, Yeah, we want to

0:23:15.680 --> 0:23:16.159
<v Speaker 3>be chased?

0:23:16.359 --> 0:23:18.520
<v Speaker 2>A yes, yes, chase me, chase me.

0:23:18.640 --> 0:23:21.600
<v Speaker 1>Okay, you we're together two years in total?

0:23:21.680 --> 0:23:21.800
<v Speaker 4>Right?

0:23:22.000 --> 0:23:24.840
<v Speaker 1>Okay, you just said something. How long in that two years?

0:23:24.880 --> 0:23:27.280
<v Speaker 1>If you look back, when did you actually know he

0:23:27.440 --> 0:23:29.800
<v Speaker 1>was not your crustacean? He was not your lobster?

0:23:31.720 --> 0:23:33.720
<v Speaker 2>A couple of months and there was an issue a

0:23:33.800 --> 0:23:35.680
<v Speaker 2>couple of months. Yeah, and I was just like, what

0:23:35.880 --> 0:23:37.160
<v Speaker 2>is going on? Who are these people?

0:23:37.880 --> 0:23:37.920
<v Speaker 5>Like?

0:23:38.280 --> 0:23:39.640
<v Speaker 2>What is happening? See?

0:23:39.720 --> 0:23:43.600
<v Speaker 1>Doesn't that happen? Only you knew that long ago, but

0:23:43.760 --> 0:23:47.280
<v Speaker 1>it took two years to finally flesh that out. Is

0:23:47.320 --> 0:23:49.159
<v Speaker 1>that always or often the case? I don't want to

0:23:49.160 --> 0:23:51.600
<v Speaker 1>say just with women, but with all of us? Isn't

0:23:51.640 --> 0:23:54.000
<v Speaker 1>that a problem? Often time we ignore the signs that

0:23:54.160 --> 0:23:56.000
<v Speaker 1>you clearly saw early on.

0:23:56.720 --> 0:23:59.800
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, we do, I think, yeah, because we want to

0:24:00.880 --> 0:24:02.760
<v Speaker 3>push through and go okay, maybe this will change, or

0:24:03.040 --> 0:24:05.600
<v Speaker 3>you know, we want the love or he's he's good

0:24:05.720 --> 0:24:07.520
<v Speaker 3>enough maybe, but it's not the best.

0:24:09.000 --> 0:24:10.840
<v Speaker 2>And you know what it's that's really interesting that you

0:24:10.880 --> 0:24:14.399
<v Speaker 2>said that, you know, he's like not good enough. And

0:24:14.480 --> 0:24:18.800
<v Speaker 2>I feel like people are like after I got you know,

0:24:19.000 --> 0:24:20.639
<v Speaker 2>I called it off. I was with I was at

0:24:20.680 --> 0:24:23.680
<v Speaker 2>this restaurant in the Hampton's and I sat with some

0:24:23.760 --> 0:24:27.600
<v Speaker 2>people that I really respect, and you know, we said

0:24:27.640 --> 0:24:30.960
<v Speaker 2>to me, you know, well, Kelly, everybody has luggage, and

0:24:31.080 --> 0:24:34.040
<v Speaker 2>I was like, okay, Louis Bauitton, fine, but like a

0:24:34.119 --> 0:24:39.280
<v Speaker 2>storage unit, like I know, I just can't. I don't

0:24:39.320 --> 0:24:41.040
<v Speaker 2>care how this lands you guys. I don't care if

0:24:41.040 --> 0:24:41.879
<v Speaker 2>you guys don't understand.

0:24:44.320 --> 0:24:46.119
<v Speaker 3>Okay, no, but don't you think older in life that

0:24:46.200 --> 0:24:48.880
<v Speaker 3>we have more stuff to put into storage like we've

0:24:48.920 --> 0:24:49.280
<v Speaker 3>got now.

0:24:49.320 --> 0:24:51.240
<v Speaker 2>It needs to be I have really nice furnitures.

0:24:51.520 --> 0:24:52.240
<v Speaker 1>I don't have room.

0:24:52.480 --> 0:24:54.159
<v Speaker 2>But it's how you organize that, right.

0:24:54.320 --> 0:24:57.080
<v Speaker 4>It can't be all and that is a huge touched.

0:24:59.000 --> 0:25:01.200
<v Speaker 2>All these little plast things. You can put them in box.

0:25:01.240 --> 0:25:03.760
<v Speaker 3>It has to be labeled and and nicely put away,

0:25:03.760 --> 0:25:05.680
<v Speaker 3>which is healed and worked on store.

0:25:05.680 --> 0:25:08.480
<v Speaker 5>It can't be yes no when you walk in and

0:25:08.560 --> 0:25:10.879
<v Speaker 5>there's just a mess everywhere, No agreed.

0:25:11.040 --> 0:25:14.280
<v Speaker 3>So the advice for someone finding love that feels that

0:25:14.440 --> 0:25:17.040
<v Speaker 3>initial I knew within the first two months what was

0:25:17.119 --> 0:25:19.720
<v Speaker 3>that piece that would be the the advice that you

0:25:19.760 --> 0:25:21.639
<v Speaker 3>would give them so that we can stop people in

0:25:21.680 --> 0:25:23.480
<v Speaker 3>their tracks to then meet the right person.

0:25:23.760 --> 0:25:27.320
<v Speaker 2>Understanding your bandwidth, I think is like mandatory for your

0:25:27.440 --> 0:25:29.399
<v Speaker 2>So for your own self, you have to instead of

0:25:29.440 --> 0:25:32.440
<v Speaker 2>people saying like you, this is okay, this is not okay,

0:25:32.960 --> 0:25:35.280
<v Speaker 2>you have to understand your own bandwidth. For some people,

0:25:35.760 --> 0:25:40.400
<v Speaker 2>what's messy is not that messy. For other people, what's

0:25:40.680 --> 0:25:44.760
<v Speaker 2>you know, what's what's what's a storage unit is? You know,

0:25:45.160 --> 0:25:47.639
<v Speaker 2>just like carry on luggage. So you just have to

0:25:47.760 --> 0:25:50.840
<v Speaker 2>understand your own bandwidth and be okay with that, do

0:25:50.880 --> 0:25:53.040
<v Speaker 2>you know what I mean? And like, you know, you

0:25:53.119 --> 0:25:56.320
<v Speaker 2>guys have been through a lot together, but you're so connected,

0:25:56.640 --> 0:25:59.080
<v Speaker 2>Like just just been talking with you before we even

0:25:59.160 --> 0:26:02.560
<v Speaker 2>started this. You guys so in love and just so

0:26:02.920 --> 0:26:06.040
<v Speaker 2>just connected. Like you know, it's you were like look

0:26:06.080 --> 0:26:08.400
<v Speaker 2>at each other when you were talking. You know, it's

0:26:08.440 --> 0:26:09.679
<v Speaker 2>not just like oh my god, what are they going

0:26:09.760 --> 0:26:11.760
<v Speaker 2>to say? I mean, you know what she's going to say,

0:26:11.920 --> 0:26:13.680
<v Speaker 2>and you know what he's going to say, and it's

0:26:13.720 --> 0:26:17.159
<v Speaker 2>just beautiful and just being able to be open to

0:26:17.880 --> 0:26:21.200
<v Speaker 2>that other person. And so I don't think the person.

0:26:21.280 --> 0:26:23.679
<v Speaker 2>You know, it's like everyone's like they they're like, oh,

0:26:23.720 --> 0:26:25.200
<v Speaker 2>I want to you know Jill's Aaron used to say,

0:26:25.200 --> 0:26:27.200
<v Speaker 2>I want a PJ. No, no, no, everyone go for

0:26:27.320 --> 0:26:31.639
<v Speaker 2>a TJ. Like that's like that's the real you know,

0:26:32.119 --> 0:26:35.080
<v Speaker 2>that's just what life is about, just like sharing memories.

0:26:35.119 --> 0:26:38.159
<v Speaker 2>So you have to understand your bandwidth and know like

0:26:38.400 --> 0:26:40.720
<v Speaker 2>what you can handle and kind of what you can't.

0:26:50.760 --> 0:26:52.639
<v Speaker 1>We will say first, thank you for the kind words.

0:26:53.280 --> 0:26:54.920
<v Speaker 1>That's true. I was like, oh, I spend a short

0:26:54.960 --> 0:26:57.639
<v Speaker 1>time with you before we came in here, but is

0:26:58.320 --> 0:27:00.640
<v Speaker 1>was there ever did you all spend in time trying

0:27:00.680 --> 0:27:02.400
<v Speaker 1>to reconcile after you cut off the wedding?

0:27:02.520 --> 0:27:05.080
<v Speaker 3>Was there ever a chance did he say, hey, I

0:27:05.080 --> 0:27:05.760
<v Speaker 3>want to go to therapy?

0:27:05.800 --> 0:27:07.960
<v Speaker 2>Maybe yeah? Oh we did go to therapy once. And

0:27:08.000 --> 0:27:09.679
<v Speaker 2>then I was I was like, this is not therapy.

0:27:09.800 --> 0:27:11.440
<v Speaker 2>I was like, this is babysitting for him. I was like,

0:27:11.480 --> 0:27:13.200
<v Speaker 2>I'm not doing this. This is like I'm like, the

0:27:13.280 --> 0:27:14.800
<v Speaker 2>therapist is supposed to be like, here are the tools

0:27:14.840 --> 0:27:17.479
<v Speaker 2>in your tool belt, use this one and she was like, Oh,

0:27:17.560 --> 0:27:19.920
<v Speaker 2>you're so handsome and cute and fun, and everybody's not

0:27:20.040 --> 0:27:21.520
<v Speaker 2>nice to you. I'm like, I'm gonna kill myself.

0:27:21.880 --> 0:27:24.440
<v Speaker 1>He charmed the therapist. He's a charming guy.

0:27:24.560 --> 0:27:26.800
<v Speaker 2>He's a very charming guy. He's very he's a great guy.

0:27:27.000 --> 0:27:27.600
<v Speaker 1>Just not for me.

0:27:27.760 --> 0:27:28.800
<v Speaker 2>It's just not my lobster.

0:27:29.080 --> 0:27:32.119
<v Speaker 3>Well, this show is a dating show. So now we

0:27:32.240 --> 0:27:34.200
<v Speaker 3>know that you're out there in the dating world.

0:27:35.359 --> 0:27:39.760
<v Speaker 1>Oh wow, oh yes outside No.

0:27:41.320 --> 0:27:43.840
<v Speaker 3>Wait, did I hear a rumor that you were dated

0:27:44.000 --> 0:27:47.200
<v Speaker 3>with Bethany's. Oh my god, what I talk about?

0:27:47.480 --> 0:27:48.440
<v Speaker 2>This is like crazy.

0:27:49.040 --> 0:27:53.520
<v Speaker 3>So my last Bethany's as the one that no no, no, no, okay.

0:27:53.720 --> 0:27:56.359
<v Speaker 2>So I'm in the Hamptons with my I'm like, you

0:27:56.359 --> 0:27:57.880
<v Speaker 2>know what, I'm gonna rent this house in the Hamptons.

0:27:58.040 --> 0:28:01.080
<v Speaker 2>I am getting my license in Texas. It's one hundred

0:28:01.080 --> 0:28:02.720
<v Speaker 2>and eighty hours. I'm going to study, do my stuff,

0:28:02.760 --> 0:28:05.400
<v Speaker 2>spend time with my kids. Learned to play polo, learn

0:28:05.440 --> 0:28:07.879
<v Speaker 2>to do something that's like so difficult. I'm going to

0:28:08.040 --> 0:28:11.120
<v Speaker 2>learn that and just really, you know, take myself out

0:28:11.359 --> 0:28:16.320
<v Speaker 2>of like all my little you know, drama filled you know, environment,

0:28:16.440 --> 0:28:18.359
<v Speaker 2>and just go do something that's different. And just like

0:28:18.680 --> 0:28:22.399
<v Speaker 2>get excited about life again. And so you know, my

0:28:22.520 --> 0:28:24.960
<v Speaker 2>daughter's like Mom, you know, she's like, you can just

0:28:25.040 --> 0:28:26.600
<v Speaker 2>go on Riot. But you you know, like at the

0:28:26.680 --> 0:28:29.359
<v Speaker 2>beginning when I was on Ryo, I was like, people

0:28:29.359 --> 0:28:31.080
<v Speaker 2>are like, they're like, oh, just say hi to people

0:28:31.080 --> 0:28:33.119
<v Speaker 2>say like hi Hi. I was like, this is not

0:28:33.200 --> 0:28:33.639
<v Speaker 2>working for me.

0:28:33.720 --> 0:28:35.800
<v Speaker 3>It's so it always just ends at the high like

0:28:35.800 --> 0:28:38.160
<v Speaker 3>I think people just want a bigger your You're cute, cute,

0:28:38.240 --> 0:28:40.280
<v Speaker 3>you liked her, and then in just the conversation ends right.

0:28:40.320 --> 0:28:41.760
<v Speaker 2>When I was yeah before and I Waskeday, I was

0:28:41.760 --> 0:28:43.240
<v Speaker 2>like hi Hi. I was like, what's this not happening?

0:28:44.880 --> 0:28:47.800
<v Speaker 2>And so she's like Mom, She's like she's like say

0:28:47.880 --> 0:28:51.480
<v Speaker 2>something like your trouble And I was like, oh, So

0:28:51.560 --> 0:28:54.160
<v Speaker 2>I was like, you know whatever, I usually say aloha.

0:28:54.240 --> 0:28:56.120
<v Speaker 2>That's usually my fan like aloha, and they're like are

0:28:56.160 --> 0:28:58.320
<v Speaker 2>you from Hawaii. I'm like I could be like, I'm

0:28:58.400 --> 0:28:58.600
<v Speaker 2>you know.

0:28:58.880 --> 0:29:01.880
<v Speaker 4>Just I love trap there exactly, thank you.

0:29:02.840 --> 0:29:04.920
<v Speaker 2>And so I was like, okay, I'm just you know,

0:29:05.320 --> 0:29:07.560
<v Speaker 2>like and then my other friend is like she's a lawyer.

0:29:07.640 --> 0:29:09.720
<v Speaker 2>She's like, it's a numbers game, just like all these guys.

0:29:09.760 --> 0:29:11.840
<v Speaker 2>So I'm like okay, like like like like oh okay,

0:29:12.040 --> 0:29:14.840
<v Speaker 2>like oh oh yeah, like like like like whatever. And

0:29:15.400 --> 0:29:17.320
<v Speaker 2>then they you know, I'm like a loha aloha, just

0:29:17.360 --> 0:29:19.320
<v Speaker 2>trying to be polite, and my my oldest starter is like,

0:29:19.360 --> 0:29:20.960
<v Speaker 2>you're not supposed to do the first one. I was like,

0:29:21.000 --> 0:29:23.440
<v Speaker 2>it's a loha. It's not like I'm saying like let's

0:29:23.480 --> 0:29:26.000
<v Speaker 2>have sex, like and she's like, eh, you're so grown.

0:29:28.200 --> 0:29:32.360
<v Speaker 2>So cut to there's this one guy that's from California,

0:29:33.760 --> 0:29:35.840
<v Speaker 2>and I was like, oh, this guy looks really nice

0:29:35.880 --> 0:29:38.040
<v Speaker 2>and he's like near Malibu, and I have this beautiful

0:29:38.040 --> 0:29:39.560
<v Speaker 2>listening in Malibu, and so I was like I spent

0:29:39.600 --> 0:29:42.080
<v Speaker 2>spent a lot of time there. And so I was like, oh,

0:29:42.560 --> 0:29:44.600
<v Speaker 2>just you know in my head, you know how you're

0:29:44.680 --> 0:29:46.160
<v Speaker 2>like you're like, oh, that's kind of nice. And I

0:29:46.200 --> 0:29:48.000
<v Speaker 2>wasn't thinking about it. And then he was like starting

0:29:48.040 --> 0:29:49.400
<v Speaker 2>to chat with me, and I was like oh okay,

0:29:49.640 --> 0:29:51.840
<v Speaker 2>and he's like, we should move over to your cell phone.

0:29:51.880 --> 0:29:55.160
<v Speaker 2>I was like, my what you want my cell phone number?

0:29:55.480 --> 0:29:57.960
<v Speaker 2>Like how does this work? So I was like okay.

0:29:58.000 --> 0:29:59.560
<v Speaker 2>I was like giving my cell phone number and then

0:29:59.600 --> 0:30:01.520
<v Speaker 2>he's like like texting me at night. I was like

0:30:01.840 --> 0:30:04.040
<v Speaker 2>like I'm not a night person. I'm like a morning person.

0:30:04.560 --> 0:30:05.880
<v Speaker 2>So I was like, why is my phone going on?

0:30:06.040 --> 0:30:08.480
<v Speaker 2>What is going on? And he was like, lah, whatever,

0:30:09.080 --> 0:30:11.080
<v Speaker 2>I have kids, I have all this stuff. And so

0:30:11.200 --> 0:30:13.400
<v Speaker 2>this goes on for a while and then I'm at

0:30:13.560 --> 0:30:16.720
<v Speaker 2>dinner at Bill Boukay in sag Harbor. I'm hunning very

0:30:16.720 --> 0:30:19.440
<v Speaker 2>bougie you guys. So we're in sag Harbor at Bill Okay,

0:30:19.440 --> 0:30:21.920
<v Speaker 2>which is a beautiful restaurant, and we're all dressed up

0:30:21.920 --> 0:30:24.240
<v Speaker 2>because we've gone out with for a work dinner, and

0:30:24.360 --> 0:30:27.160
<v Speaker 2>my two girls were there and I walk out. He

0:30:27.240 --> 0:30:31.640
<v Speaker 2>goes Kelly, and my oldest daughter is like hell, and

0:30:31.760 --> 0:30:33.480
<v Speaker 2>my younger sons like I don't think you know my mom,

0:30:33.840 --> 0:30:36.240
<v Speaker 2>Like we have no idea who you are. Basically like

0:30:36.440 --> 0:30:39.800
<v Speaker 2>she's totally giving him the cold shoulder, and he's like Kelly,

0:30:40.040 --> 0:30:41.960
<v Speaker 2>He's like, I'm a twan Riah and I'm just like

0:30:43.480 --> 0:30:46.520
<v Speaker 2>and like everyone's just like and I was like, oh

0:30:46.560 --> 0:30:48.200
<v Speaker 2>my god. I was like hi again, I to see you.

0:30:48.280 --> 0:30:50.040
<v Speaker 2>And then my daughter's like, I'm getting ice cream bye,

0:30:50.080 --> 0:30:52.280
<v Speaker 2>and I'm like I'm I'm just gonna go get ice cream,

0:30:52.440 --> 0:30:55.560
<v Speaker 2>and so like I literally I'm awkwarded, this was the guy. Yeah,

0:30:55.600 --> 0:30:56.280
<v Speaker 2>don't look at me like that.

0:30:58.040 --> 0:30:58.760
<v Speaker 1>This was the guy.

0:30:59.160 --> 0:31:02.280
<v Speaker 2>This was the guy I was texting with. So then

0:31:02.520 --> 0:31:05.080
<v Speaker 2>whatever I text him. I didn't text him my best friend.

0:31:05.440 --> 0:31:07.480
<v Speaker 2>My friends like she texted him and she's like, yeah,

0:31:07.560 --> 0:31:10.240
<v Speaker 2>so nice to see you. We should connect because she's

0:31:10.320 --> 0:31:12.200
<v Speaker 2>like you gotta like get him to connect.

0:31:11.920 --> 0:31:13.040
<v Speaker 3>Right, And how long goes this?

0:31:13.600 --> 0:31:15.360
<v Speaker 2>I need like three weeks ago.

0:31:17.080 --> 0:31:18.520
<v Speaker 1>This is sounding like a good story to me.

0:31:21.160 --> 0:31:23.320
<v Speaker 3>Then like I'm related to Bethany or not.

0:31:26.960 --> 0:31:28.960
<v Speaker 2>Okay, so I'm gonna go I'm gonna talk past her. Okay.

0:31:29.040 --> 0:31:33.120
<v Speaker 2>So so we are like I'm like, he's like texting

0:31:33.200 --> 0:31:34.680
<v Speaker 2>back and forth all this stuff, and then all of

0:31:34.720 --> 0:31:35.960
<v Speaker 2>a sudden, like I don't care from him for a

0:31:35.960 --> 0:31:37.520
<v Speaker 2>couple of days. But I was like, oh whatever, like

0:31:37.640 --> 0:31:40.560
<v Speaker 2>it's you know, I'm doing my stuff. And so then

0:31:40.880 --> 0:31:44.200
<v Speaker 2>it's after Labor Day weekend and I'm in the Hampton's

0:31:44.280 --> 0:31:46.360
<v Speaker 2>and on Ria it tells you where people are. I

0:31:46.400 --> 0:31:48.280
<v Speaker 2>did not know this, but I found out this that

0:31:48.800 --> 0:31:52.400
<v Speaker 2>it says like visiting, visiting in wherever. I was like, wow,

0:31:52.680 --> 0:31:53.920
<v Speaker 2>they oh my god, you know where people are.

0:31:54.000 --> 0:31:54.480
<v Speaker 4>So that's fun.

0:31:55.280 --> 0:31:57.120
<v Speaker 2>So he's like, are you in Montalk and I'm like,

0:31:57.200 --> 0:32:00.440
<v Speaker 2>I happened to be in Montalk doing a photos and

0:32:01.240 --> 0:32:03.000
<v Speaker 2>he was like, let's meet for a drink. My kids

0:32:03.040 --> 0:32:05.920
<v Speaker 2>are leaving and I was like okay. So then he

0:32:06.200 --> 0:32:07.680
<v Speaker 2>I was like, oh, you know, I have to be

0:32:07.760 --> 0:32:08.840
<v Speaker 2>back in New York, so I had to be in

0:32:08.840 --> 0:32:10.560
<v Speaker 2>New York early. And I was like, well, we can

0:32:10.640 --> 0:32:12.600
<v Speaker 2>meet for a drink, but like I'm driving two mon

0:32:12.680 --> 0:32:14.760
<v Speaker 2>talk and it's spotty in the Hampton. So I was

0:32:14.800 --> 0:32:20.520
<v Speaker 2>like it's either now or like basically never, so you know,

0:32:20.560 --> 0:32:22.440
<v Speaker 2>and we've been like texting a lot, like he was

0:32:22.520 --> 0:32:26.080
<v Speaker 2>like always texting me like and so then I was

0:32:26.120 --> 0:32:27.840
<v Speaker 2>like I have to leave, like I can't be in

0:32:28.120 --> 0:32:29.240
<v Speaker 2>wait for you in Bridge Hampton.

0:32:30.040 --> 0:32:32.680
<v Speaker 3>So a week later, this is very dispensable.

0:32:32.680 --> 0:32:33.160
<v Speaker 4>I'm here, I.

0:32:34.960 --> 0:32:39.840
<v Speaker 2>Like my friend goes, wait, is this the guy that

0:32:39.960 --> 0:32:44.680
<v Speaker 2>you were dating? And I'm like who what? And it

0:32:44.800 --> 0:32:48.720
<v Speaker 2>just like sends me page six and it's like Brittany

0:32:51.440 --> 0:32:55.760
<v Speaker 2>dating this guy and I'm like wait what. I'm like,

0:32:55.920 --> 0:32:58.360
<v Speaker 2>so he's dating her and me? So I sent him

0:32:58.360 --> 0:33:00.680
<v Speaker 2>a text and I'm like I'm like, oh. I was

0:33:00.720 --> 0:33:02.720
<v Speaker 2>like the Hamptons is such a beautiful place, Like I

0:33:02.800 --> 0:33:05.080
<v Speaker 2>hope you come back. I'm really really sorry you are

0:33:05.120 --> 0:33:09.000
<v Speaker 2>a part of the dark side. And then he called me.

0:33:10.520 --> 0:33:14.640
<v Speaker 5>But when he was actively dating or is actively dating

0:33:14.760 --> 0:33:17.480
<v Speaker 5>Bethany Franklin, he's texting with.

0:33:17.560 --> 0:33:20.120
<v Speaker 2>You, Yeah, he said that like that. She was like,

0:33:20.600 --> 0:33:22.920
<v Speaker 2>I don't feel like this is going anywhere, And so

0:33:23.000 --> 0:33:24.840
<v Speaker 2>then he started texting me. I'm like, so now I'm like,

0:33:24.920 --> 0:33:28.000
<v Speaker 2>you're sloppy seconds no thank you to no one ever

0:33:28.200 --> 0:33:30.000
<v Speaker 2>like no thank you. I'm like, oh my god, hidios.

0:33:30.360 --> 0:33:32.400
<v Speaker 3>The dating world is so tough.

0:33:32.480 --> 0:33:34.720
<v Speaker 5>I was going to say, so is that small of

0:33:34.800 --> 0:33:36.640
<v Speaker 5>a pool to pick from here in New York?

0:33:36.760 --> 0:33:38.280
<v Speaker 4>By that can happen.

0:33:38.280 --> 0:33:41.600
<v Speaker 2>Even worse than I mean, first of all, like like

0:33:41.680 --> 0:33:43.720
<v Speaker 2>whatever you think about her, like like her or not

0:33:43.920 --> 0:33:47.200
<v Speaker 2>like her every single like almost I would personally.

0:33:47.440 --> 0:33:49.600
<v Speaker 3>She's always been so kind and lovely to me with

0:33:49.920 --> 0:33:51.720
<v Speaker 3>a podcasts and through dms.

0:33:52.240 --> 0:33:58.160
<v Speaker 2>But like, yeah, that's amazing for you. She's been opposite

0:33:58.200 --> 0:33:58.400
<v Speaker 2>to me.

0:33:58.640 --> 0:33:59.960
<v Speaker 4>Oh no, awful.

0:34:00.280 --> 0:34:01.000
<v Speaker 3>I'm so sorry.

0:34:01.120 --> 0:34:03.320
<v Speaker 4>I just I love that Jane is just now getting

0:34:03.360 --> 0:34:05.920
<v Speaker 4>filled in on this. I'm so sorry.

0:34:06.120 --> 0:34:07.720
<v Speaker 2>She's like my quote unquote.

0:34:07.400 --> 0:34:10.399
<v Speaker 3>Like like you guys to get along in the show,

0:34:11.000 --> 0:34:12.040
<v Speaker 3>like millionaires show.

0:34:12.080 --> 0:34:12.400
<v Speaker 4>I didn't know.

0:34:14.719 --> 0:34:17.520
<v Speaker 2>She takes life to another level. It's whatever she can

0:34:17.640 --> 0:34:20.440
<v Speaker 2>to get, like anything. She's very thirsty. So cut to

0:34:21.840 --> 0:34:24.400
<v Speaker 2>She's like, so I was like, I'll meet a guy

0:34:24.440 --> 0:34:26.359
<v Speaker 2>and I'll be like going on a date and he's like, oh,

0:34:27.360 --> 0:34:29.880
<v Speaker 2>so your best friend. I'm like i dated her. I'm like,

0:34:29.920 --> 0:34:30.959
<v Speaker 2>who's my best friend?

0:34:32.320 --> 0:34:36.120
<v Speaker 4>But really, wow, Brittany, I'm like, wait a.

0:34:36.120 --> 0:34:37.640
<v Speaker 2>Minute, I'm sorry, Brittany.

0:34:37.680 --> 0:34:40.360
<v Speaker 4>It's just it's just a moniker. It's a moniker that

0:34:40.560 --> 0:34:42.400
<v Speaker 4>was just created. Okay, got it.

0:34:43.000 --> 0:34:43.840
<v Speaker 5>So I was just like.

0:34:46.560 --> 0:34:48.839
<v Speaker 3>I used to want to hear but her real name,

0:34:48.920 --> 0:34:50.120
<v Speaker 3>Brittany Britney Frank.

0:34:50.239 --> 0:34:51.880
<v Speaker 4>It's it's yes, it is.

0:34:52.160 --> 0:34:55.719
<v Speaker 5>It's just you know what, when you don't have good

0:34:55.760 --> 0:34:58.520
<v Speaker 5>feelings about someone, I understand this, you just don't want

0:34:58.560 --> 0:34:59.440
<v Speaker 5>to even give their name.

0:34:59.520 --> 0:35:01.279
<v Speaker 4>Powers, come up with a different names.

0:35:01.440 --> 0:35:03.120
<v Speaker 3>I've made up names in my book to not give

0:35:03.120 --> 0:35:05.839
<v Speaker 3>people power. There you go, and legal reasons. But that's

0:35:06.000 --> 0:35:06.319
<v Speaker 3>that's going.

0:35:08.560 --> 0:35:10.320
<v Speaker 1>But were you interested in the guy genuinely?

0:35:10.480 --> 0:35:13.200
<v Speaker 2>He was. He's a really like nice guy, like he

0:35:13.280 --> 0:35:14.320
<v Speaker 2>has kids my age.

0:35:15.560 --> 0:35:16.080
<v Speaker 3>Disappointed.

0:35:16.160 --> 0:35:17.880
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, And I was like, oh my god, like we

0:35:18.000 --> 0:35:21.560
<v Speaker 2>have like similar like you know, we're interests and I

0:35:21.680 --> 0:35:22.920
<v Speaker 2>was like, Oh, that would have been fun, but I

0:35:23.040 --> 0:35:25.680
<v Speaker 2>was like, you still pursue you Well, he gave me

0:35:25.800 --> 0:35:28.040
<v Speaker 2>this weird phone call which is kind of like basically

0:35:28.200 --> 0:35:29.200
<v Speaker 2>like if it doesn't.

0:35:28.960 --> 0:35:31.799
<v Speaker 3>Work out, I'll let you know, trying to go back

0:35:31.840 --> 0:35:32.200
<v Speaker 3>to Britain.

0:35:32.280 --> 0:35:33.560
<v Speaker 2>I don't know what he was doing, but I was

0:35:33.640 --> 0:35:34.960
<v Speaker 2>just like, I'm not interested in anything.

0:35:35.480 --> 0:35:37.120
<v Speaker 3>The only thing that I will say about Ryah, which

0:35:37.200 --> 0:35:38.520
<v Speaker 3>is the piece I don't like, Like I know that

0:35:38.640 --> 0:35:41.640
<v Speaker 3>I was some of my friends on the time that

0:35:41.760 --> 0:35:45.480
<v Speaker 3>I was on Riot up he was matching. Certain people

0:35:45.520 --> 0:35:47.600
<v Speaker 3>would match with some of my girlfriends and they're like, oh,

0:35:47.920 --> 0:35:50.600
<v Speaker 3>like my girlfriend Caitlin, she's lovely, and she'll be like, oh,

0:35:50.680 --> 0:35:52.160
<v Speaker 3>you match with him too. I matched with him, and

0:35:52.239 --> 0:35:54.000
<v Speaker 3>I'm like, oh, you can totally have him if you want. Like,

0:35:54.040 --> 0:35:56.920
<v Speaker 3>I don't think there's but everyone is kind of talking

0:35:56.960 --> 0:35:59.759
<v Speaker 3>to everyone until it becomes, you know, a thing. So

0:36:00.080 --> 0:36:02.080
<v Speaker 3>I'm not giving him grace whatsoever. Like if he was

0:36:02.160 --> 0:36:04.080
<v Speaker 3>actually in a relationship, that's messed up. But I will

0:36:04.120 --> 0:36:05.719
<v Speaker 3>give grace to the guy. Where I feel like a

0:36:05.760 --> 0:36:08.480
<v Speaker 3>lot of guys are called out for talking to different

0:36:08.480 --> 0:36:10.440
<v Speaker 3>people if you're just dating. That's the dating world. You're

0:36:10.440 --> 0:36:12.320
<v Speaker 3>talking to different people until I don't know. It's just

0:36:12.400 --> 0:36:14.959
<v Speaker 3>my personal opinion. For I'm not totally bashing the dude.

0:36:16.160 --> 0:36:19.920
<v Speaker 2>Like listen, Like, do I think that he's a bad person, No?

0:36:20.400 --> 0:36:22.799
<v Speaker 2>But do I think that he loves housewives? Yes?

0:36:23.000 --> 0:36:26.919
<v Speaker 1>He knew what he was doing. You can't.

0:36:27.520 --> 0:36:30.480
<v Speaker 2>All he has to do is google and being you

0:36:30.520 --> 0:36:34.040
<v Speaker 2>know what I mean, he knew exactly what the situation is,

0:36:34.760 --> 0:36:37.400
<v Speaker 2>and people are googling people like I don't necessarily like

0:36:37.480 --> 0:36:38.719
<v Speaker 2>to do that because.

0:36:38.800 --> 0:36:42.080
<v Speaker 3>I didn't google you for I didn't know the drama,

0:36:42.160 --> 0:36:45.160
<v Speaker 3>so I apolish. I just figured, like, you know, that

0:36:45.360 --> 0:36:46.319
<v Speaker 3>was like kind of show made.

0:36:46.440 --> 0:36:48.759
<v Speaker 2>I didn't know it was, well it was supposed to be,

0:36:49.080 --> 0:36:50.759
<v Speaker 2>but then it was like life made, and I was like,

0:36:50.840 --> 0:36:52.359
<v Speaker 2>this is so weird. I was like, I don't even

0:36:52.360 --> 0:36:53.160
<v Speaker 2>know what's going on here.

0:36:53.440 --> 0:36:55.200
<v Speaker 3>What do you think makes a person thirsty?

0:36:58.200 --> 0:37:03.920
<v Speaker 2>Just constantly going after you for things or just commenting

0:37:05.160 --> 0:37:09.239
<v Speaker 2>just you know, just genuinely inherently just mean things, or

0:37:09.360 --> 0:37:11.600
<v Speaker 2>going after people that are like I think one of

0:37:11.680 --> 0:37:14.120
<v Speaker 2>the things that at the very beginning, which we're not

0:37:14.160 --> 0:37:16.239
<v Speaker 2>talking about it, but just like what I don't like

0:37:16.400 --> 0:37:19.120
<v Speaker 2>in general is that going after people that are like

0:37:19.560 --> 0:37:23.840
<v Speaker 2>doing good things, Like I don't go after you to

0:37:23.960 --> 0:37:26.720
<v Speaker 2>say like, oh my god, like you've had three marriages,

0:37:26.760 --> 0:37:29.239
<v Speaker 2>I've only had one marriage. I'm better than you. Like

0:37:29.320 --> 0:37:30.680
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, oh my god, I have empathy. I'm like,

0:37:30.719 --> 0:37:32.719
<v Speaker 2>oh my, there must have been something happening. So a

0:37:32.760 --> 0:37:35.319
<v Speaker 2>thirsty person to someone like like goes after someone who's

0:37:35.320 --> 0:37:38.239
<v Speaker 2>successful so that they can hop on that success, but

0:37:38.360 --> 0:37:41.160
<v Speaker 2>then drag that person's success down so that they can

0:37:41.280 --> 0:37:45.000
<v Speaker 2>kind of prop themselves up. So that's kind of how

0:37:45.080 --> 0:37:45.399
<v Speaker 2>I see.

0:37:45.400 --> 0:37:48.360
<v Speaker 3>It makes sense. You don't know the full picture of things, right, And.

0:37:48.560 --> 0:37:51.040
<v Speaker 2>I'm always like tell me, like, yeah, you know, but

0:37:51.280 --> 0:37:53.640
<v Speaker 2>then you know, I guess from being on television, people

0:37:53.760 --> 0:37:57.200
<v Speaker 2>just genuinely think that you know, we know everything. I'm

0:37:57.200 --> 0:37:59.720
<v Speaker 2>always like, listen, if you want me to know your story,

0:37:59.760 --> 0:38:02.160
<v Speaker 2>you can send your bio to me beforehand and I'll

0:38:02.239 --> 0:38:04.640
<v Speaker 2>read it. Like That's how they were. They were like,

0:38:04.760 --> 0:38:07.120
<v Speaker 2>you don't know everything about me. I'm like, no, I've

0:38:07.160 --> 0:38:10.080
<v Speaker 2>never even met you before. I'm trying to learn. You

0:38:10.160 --> 0:38:11.640
<v Speaker 2>can give me a chance to learn.

0:38:12.120 --> 0:38:14.000
<v Speaker 4>Kelly, what is the dating world? Like?

0:38:14.120 --> 0:38:19.120
<v Speaker 5>You are fifty six, yes, stunning, gorgeous you there's a

0:38:19.239 --> 0:38:22.800
<v Speaker 5>trend and I'm living it actually right now, where women

0:38:23.040 --> 0:38:27.479
<v Speaker 5>are dating and it's perfectly acceptable dating younger men. What's

0:38:27.600 --> 0:38:29.920
<v Speaker 5>your thought on that and what do you like when

0:38:29.920 --> 0:38:32.000
<v Speaker 5>you're looking at who you might date. What do you

0:38:32.120 --> 0:38:34.359
<v Speaker 5>give as an age range that you'd be willing to date?

0:38:34.440 --> 0:38:35.160
<v Speaker 5>How low would you go?

0:38:35.239 --> 0:38:36.000
<v Speaker 4>How high would you go?

0:38:36.480 --> 0:38:38.480
<v Speaker 2>You know this is numberwise? Well, because like you know,

0:38:38.600 --> 0:38:40.759
<v Speaker 2>I always like defer to my kids about everything because

0:38:40.800 --> 0:38:43.040
<v Speaker 2>it's like there are my like, you know, life arbiters

0:38:43.120 --> 0:38:45.440
<v Speaker 2>and I'm like, okay, so what is it? And they're like, mom,

0:38:46.160 --> 0:38:47.960
<v Speaker 2>so like my oldest is twenty six. She's like, mom,

0:38:48.080 --> 0:38:49.920
<v Speaker 2>I'm twenty six, so you can't go to thirty. I'm like,

0:38:49.960 --> 0:38:52.239
<v Speaker 2>I didn't say I was going to thirty. She's like, well,

0:38:52.280 --> 0:38:54.760
<v Speaker 2>some guys at thirty might like you. I'm like, well, okay,

0:38:55.120 --> 0:38:58.600
<v Speaker 2>but I didn't say that. You said that, So I

0:38:58.680 --> 0:39:02.719
<v Speaker 2>think like mid sixty and like, you know, mid forties

0:39:02.880 --> 0:39:05.359
<v Speaker 2>is you know good, like you know, ten years younger,

0:39:05.440 --> 0:39:07.520
<v Speaker 2>ten years older. I think it's like a good thing.

0:39:07.920 --> 0:39:09.560
<v Speaker 2>I mean I did date one time, one guy that

0:39:09.719 --> 0:39:12.920
<v Speaker 2>was fifteen years younger than me, the nicest human, I mean,

0:39:12.960 --> 0:39:15.040
<v Speaker 2>he was such a smoke show God, he was so long.

0:39:15.280 --> 0:39:21.880
<v Speaker 3>What happened so much? The reason was the age difference

0:39:21.920 --> 0:39:23.680
<v Speaker 3>in issue and the nicest person.

0:39:23.520 --> 0:39:26.080
<v Speaker 2>On the planet, it was, it was just he was

0:39:26.120 --> 0:39:26.560
<v Speaker 2>just too young.

0:39:26.600 --> 0:39:27.839
<v Speaker 4>He was too young. He was too young.

0:39:27.920 --> 0:39:28.799
<v Speaker 3>And what made it too young?

0:39:28.840 --> 0:39:30.960
<v Speaker 2>Because he was fifteen years younger than me, And that

0:39:31.080 --> 0:39:31.360
<v Speaker 2>was just.

0:39:31.400 --> 0:39:33.960
<v Speaker 3>The number that was bothering here was there an actual reason.

0:39:33.800 --> 0:39:35.759
<v Speaker 2>For it was the number. I just felt like he

0:39:35.880 --> 0:39:38.400
<v Speaker 2>was just too young. I was just like and like

0:39:38.480 --> 0:39:39.800
<v Speaker 2>I went out to dinner with one time with his

0:39:39.920 --> 0:39:41.400
<v Speaker 2>friends and they were all young, and I was like,

0:39:41.480 --> 0:39:42.200
<v Speaker 2>this is too young.

0:39:42.640 --> 0:39:44.160
<v Speaker 3>But that's like that I don't know, but I'm like,

0:39:44.360 --> 0:39:46.000
<v Speaker 3>I mean, I get that the same time. Like that

0:39:46.040 --> 0:39:48.799
<v Speaker 3>Ann Hathaway movie, I'm like, I just I think there's

0:39:49.680 --> 0:39:51.359
<v Speaker 3>I don't want people just to focus on the number.

0:39:51.800 --> 0:39:52.160
<v Speaker 4>I don't.

0:39:52.200 --> 0:39:52.879
<v Speaker 3>I love that movie.

0:39:52.880 --> 0:39:54.560
<v Speaker 4>I thought was sod. I read the book I loved

0:39:55.000 --> 0:39:55.400
<v Speaker 4>I loved that.

0:39:55.440 --> 0:39:56.719
<v Speaker 2>I loved it. I ran to.

0:39:58.320 --> 0:39:59.080
<v Speaker 3>I love that movie.

0:39:59.400 --> 0:39:59.719
<v Speaker 2>I did.

0:40:00.080 --> 0:40:00.160
<v Speaker 5>Well.

0:40:00.239 --> 0:40:00.680
<v Speaker 2>It was a lot.

0:40:00.960 --> 0:40:01.800
<v Speaker 4>He was in his twenties.

0:40:02.000 --> 0:40:05.360
<v Speaker 3>I mean, but love is love, okay, right, I love it?

0:40:06.080 --> 0:40:06.239
<v Speaker 5>Well.

0:40:06.480 --> 0:40:08.200
<v Speaker 2>You know what the thing is too is it's like

0:40:08.600 --> 0:40:11.560
<v Speaker 2>twenty years I when I was dating this guy, who

0:40:11.680 --> 0:40:14.120
<v Speaker 2>was fifteen, who is just so attractive. I'll tell his

0:40:14.200 --> 0:40:16.120
<v Speaker 2>name is Alejandro when he's just so attractive and what

0:40:17.280 --> 0:40:20.200
<v Speaker 2>you know, he's hot with a name like so well

0:40:20.280 --> 0:40:25.719
<v Speaker 2>mannered and nice and kind of attractive. He you know,

0:40:25.840 --> 0:40:27.399
<v Speaker 2>he was so nice to my kids, but my kids

0:40:27.440 --> 0:40:31.360
<v Speaker 2>were younger, and I just was like, I knew that

0:40:31.480 --> 0:40:34.759
<v Speaker 2>he wanted more kids, and I was like, I don't

0:40:34.880 --> 0:40:37.200
<v Speaker 2>know if that was going to be something that we

0:40:37.320 --> 0:40:40.440
<v Speaker 2>could do, and you know, he was also you know,

0:40:40.480 --> 0:40:42.880
<v Speaker 2>it was just like in his early he was thirty

0:40:43.000 --> 0:40:44.880
<v Speaker 2>and so he was like, you know, just trying to

0:40:45.000 --> 0:40:47.520
<v Speaker 2>like get his life started, and I just didn't think

0:40:47.560 --> 0:40:48.920
<v Speaker 2>that that was like appropriate.

0:40:49.280 --> 0:40:51.399
<v Speaker 1>We have so much more to talk with Kelly about

0:40:51.440 --> 0:40:54.000
<v Speaker 1>when we continue our conversation. If you are single and

0:40:54.080 --> 0:40:56.960
<v Speaker 1>ready to find love again, call us at one eight

0:40:57.120 --> 0:41:00.319
<v Speaker 1>four four four I Do Pod. That's a eight four

0:41:00.400 --> 0:41:04.400
<v Speaker 1>four four four three six seven six three, or you

0:41:04.480 --> 0:41:08.359
<v Speaker 1>can email us at idopod at iHeartRadio dot com. That's

0:41:08.680 --> 0:41:12.520
<v Speaker 1>idopod at iHeartRadio dot com. Or you can follow us

0:41:12.560 --> 0:41:16.480
<v Speaker 1>on Instagram at I Do Part two Pod. That's I

0:41:16.680 --> 0:41:20.080
<v Speaker 1>Do Part two. That's the digit two in the middle

0:41:20.080 --> 0:41:23.560
<v Speaker 1>of there. I Do Part two pod and iHeartRadio podcast

0:41:23.600 --> 0:41:25.880
<v Speaker 1>where falling in love is the main objective.