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Speaker 1: Scotty you ready, Oh I'm ready. Let's laugh and laugh

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Speaker 1: and laugh.

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Speaker 2: We asked the math tutor who posts his lessons on

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Speaker 2: porn hub.

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Speaker 3: Why oh, that's a juicy one to start us off. Well,

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Speaker 3: let's get into this very mathematical and slightly horny bananas

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Speaker 3: do worlds.

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Speaker 1: Would you.

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Speaker 4: My resillion pieces?

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Speaker 1: Would you.

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Speaker 2: Baa guys goals, non binary pals, Welcome to Bananas.

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Speaker 3: I am one of your hosts. Kurt Brown Older, I'm

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Speaker 3: the other one. Scotti Land is coming to U from

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Speaker 3: an Airbnb in Parkslow, Brooklyn because we have a show

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Speaker 3: oh tomorrow night that is sold out at the Bellhouse,

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Speaker 3: So thank you body, and this will come out after that.

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Speaker 3: So thanks for everybody for screaming so loud we get arrested.

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Speaker 2: Yay, I'm very excited. I'm flying to New York tomorrow.

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Speaker 2: I'm excited, quite exciting. But what I'm even more excited

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Speaker 2: about me too, is our fantastic guest today. Scottie, our

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Speaker 2: guest today is a writer, a performer, an actor, a comedian.

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Speaker 2: She You might know her from the Emmy Award winning Hacks,

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Speaker 2: in which she herself.

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Speaker 1: Was nominated for an Emmy.

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Speaker 2: Please welcome the amazing Hannah iinbinder.

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Speaker 4: Hello, welcome Hannah, Thank you. I am the resident Hannah

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Speaker 4: Banana today. Most days in my life when I am

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Speaker 4: called that, I go all right, sir, settled out today,

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Speaker 4: I'm taking it. You feel free, you know, grow that

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Speaker 4: out if you please.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you're the You're the number one Hanna Banana here.

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Speaker 1: Yes, man.

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Speaker 3: Many many years ago, I when Twitter was like taking off,

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Speaker 3: and when Twitter was like it was like people writing

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Speaker 3: jokes and making each other laugh and not just like

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Speaker 3: politics and feel bad and hate yourself. I got asked

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Speaker 3: to come out to Los Angeles with a bunch of

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Speaker 3: other like Twitter people that were pretty popular, and they

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Speaker 3: wanted to have a show that was completely written by

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Speaker 3: Twitter people. You can imagine that it didn't happen, but

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Speaker 3: they paid for us. They flew us out, and the

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Speaker 3: star of it was supposed to be Jason Biggs, after

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Speaker 3: the star of American Pie, and he was like, let's

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Speaker 3: let's talk, let's get to know each other because we

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Speaker 3: might be working to you again. Twitter showed never went.

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Speaker 3: So we go to this bar in LA and he

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Speaker 3: intentionally picks this bar that's very empty middle of the day,

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Speaker 3: which is great there's literally one old man seated at

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Speaker 3: the bar and I go down. He's like what, I'm like,

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Speaker 3: I'll just take like a maker's on the rocks. He's like,

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Speaker 3: got it, walks up orders it, and this old guy

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Speaker 3: leans over to him and Jason like laughs and like

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Speaker 3: puts his head back like, oh yeah, that's very funny anecdote, sir.

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Speaker 3: And he comes back to me and I was like,

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Speaker 3: did that guy say did you recognize your Somebody goes yeah.

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Speaker 3: That guy said, are you the guy that fucked that pie?

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Speaker 3: And I said, you're kidding me? He goes, I've gotten

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Speaker 3: it like every two days for of course fifteen years.

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Speaker 2: I think I would say it to him.

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Speaker 1: It was incredible.

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Speaker 3: So Hannah Banana is a much better way for me

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Speaker 3: to be referred to by men in public.

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Speaker 4: It could be worse.

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Speaker 2: I met Hannah many years ago, really when she did

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Speaker 2: Hot Tub, and I remember, and I've very rarely have

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Speaker 2: ever done this, where I saw her do her set

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Speaker 2: and I was like, I like that so much, and

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Speaker 2: I immediately walked backstage and I was like, will you

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Speaker 2: come and open for me in Santa Barb And you

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Speaker 2: were like yes. And then Scottie, you came up that time, yes,

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Speaker 2: for that show, and that was a really fun show.

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Speaker 2: But it was like immediately I was like, I know, Hannah,

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Speaker 2: she's going places, Kurt.

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Speaker 4: That is so sweet. And that was the first like

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Speaker 4: cool thing that that was the first person. You were

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Speaker 4: the first person to ever ask me to open for them.

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Speaker 1: Ever, Oh that's crazy.

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Speaker 4: It was like I, you know, had made a list

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Speaker 4: of goals earlier that year, and I was like, open

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Speaker 4: for someone cool, and it came true because you asked me,

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Speaker 4: and it was so cool. And my dad came with

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Speaker 4: me and he dayd myself on my iPhone or some shit,

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Speaker 4: and it was so cool. It was so awesome, like

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Speaker 4: we it was I think you were doing a college right.

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Speaker 2: It was Santa Barbara, I don't know, yeah, And it

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Speaker 2: was just it was just so fun and like obviously

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Speaker 2: such a formative moment for any young con and like

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Speaker 2: those early days, it's so important and it's such a

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Speaker 2: great learning experience.

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Speaker 4: So thank you.

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Speaker 1: Oh of course.

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Speaker 2: I was just thinking, like I was just thinking back

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Speaker 2: about opening for people and like what a what like

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Speaker 2: I would give it. I would give anything to open

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Speaker 2: for someone, now, do you know what I mean? It's

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Speaker 2: so pleasant yeah, you go up and you do fifteen

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Speaker 2: minutes and then you just get to like hang out,

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Speaker 2: and then a bunch of people who don't know who

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Speaker 2: you are, like, I.

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Speaker 1: Like this person, who are they?

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Speaker 2: I kind of want to go back.

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Speaker 1: I would.

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Speaker 2: I will be the first. I'll be like going back

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Speaker 2: to opening for you.

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Speaker 1: I'm ready to do that.

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Speaker 4: We gig. It is truly such a sweet gig. And

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Speaker 4: it's just I mean, it does depend on the pair,

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Speaker 4: of course, because you know, you and I are birds

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Speaker 4: of the same feather, you know, birds of a feather.

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Speaker 4: I should say, you stick together for birds of a feather,

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Speaker 4: and that feather is the color orange, so like it's

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Speaker 4: a strawberry blonde feather. But you know, yeah, it's certainly like, uh,

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Speaker 4: it's certainly good when when you when you feel like

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Speaker 4: your sensibility matches up.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, no, I mean Kindred Spirit definitely. Do you want

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Speaker 2: to hear Kindred Spirit? Do you want to hear about

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Speaker 2: this math tutor? Yes, this is a delightful story. That's

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Speaker 2: why I figured i'd start with it. It's really heartwarming.

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Speaker 2: I think maybe I'm wrong here it goes. This is

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Speaker 2: from Vice. This was sent in by Gerhard thereon He's

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Speaker 2: also known as at Captain Hamsack on Instagram. This was

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Speaker 2: This was printed in Vice. It wasn't actually printed, but

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Speaker 2: it was digitally printed, and it was written by co

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Speaker 2: you co you best in the.

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Speaker 1: That's the best in the business. There it is here.

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Speaker 2: It is among the trove of wild role play in

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Speaker 2: bizarre COVID porn. A bespecled man clad in a thick

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Speaker 2: gray hoodie is an unlikely hit on porn Hub. Yes,

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Speaker 2: scribbling mathematical equations on a chalkboard and explaining them in

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Speaker 2: utmost seriousness, the unassuming tutor has carved a niche for

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Speaker 2: himself in a corner of one of the largest porn

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Speaker 2: sites without even being remotely sexual. This isn't some next

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Speaker 2: level take on professor roleplay or the nerdy side of

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Speaker 2: rule thirty four. No, we've just stumbled upon a tutor's

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Speaker 2: extremely earnest attempt to teach math. Yeah, why you ask,

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Speaker 2: let me tell you, okay. Shunwei Chong thirty four, who

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Speaker 2: also goes by the name stage name Chunk Su, is

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Speaker 2: a Taiwanese math tutor who runs a porn hum account

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Speaker 2: with over seven thousand subscribers. His channel fronted by a cheeky,

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Speaker 2: play hard, study hard slogan. It contains hundreds of videos

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Speaker 2: of him explaining calculus. His videos have racked up over

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Speaker 2: two million views, making him a successful fully making him

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Speaker 2: a successful fully clothed content creator in space dominated by nudity.

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Speaker 2: So while he has been posting mathe maatorials on Pornhub

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Speaker 2: for over a year, he went viral after catching the

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Speaker 2: attention of Taiwanese news outlets in October. Since then, he's

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Speaker 2: been interviewed blah blah blah, he says.

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Speaker 1: Quote.

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Speaker 2: A lot of people only see my marketing strategy and

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Speaker 2: thinks it's interesting, Chang says, but as it turns out,

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Speaker 2: driving the absurd antics with sheer desperation as Chang grappled

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Speaker 2: with a personal crisis. So little information about this. Tuition

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Speaker 2: centers also known as cram schools, which is strange that

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Speaker 2: this is a porn hub thing and there's cram schools right.

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Speaker 2: Our lucrative businesses in Asia were cutthroat competition and education

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Speaker 2: systems for students to seek additional academic help from after

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Speaker 2: school tutoring. Before last year, Chang was running his own

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Speaker 2: tutoring center in sin Chu, a city in North wet

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Speaker 2: northern Taiwan, along with a few coworkers he had hired.

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Speaker 2: But Chang was caught off guard in Febbu twenty twenty

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Speaker 2: when one of his coworkers opened up a new cram

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Speaker 2: school right above his.

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Speaker 1: Quote.

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Speaker 2: They took all my students upstairs from a cram school

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Speaker 2: suddenly lost all its income and could no longer operate. No,

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Speaker 2: he was no longer cram and folks.

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Speaker 1: Now.

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Speaker 2: Chang was suddenly left with the messy remains of his

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Speaker 2: defunct teaching space and thirty five nine dollars in debt

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Speaker 2: to including money too much for gram and including money

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Speaker 2: he had borrowed from the bank to set up his school.

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Speaker 2: So I don't even know how much that is here.

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Speaker 1: It is quote.

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Speaker 2: The problem got so serious that at one point I

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Speaker 2: contemplated suicide. I was simply in too much debt, and

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Speaker 2: I wasn't confident that I could repay it quickly. But

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Speaker 2: ultimately Chining decided to start a new business where he

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Speaker 2: could put his skills to as a tutor.

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Speaker 1: To good use.

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Speaker 2: Pivoted online teaching, setting up a website. But you know

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Speaker 2: he was doing it. He was doing one hundred calculus

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Speaker 2: problems in ten hours, doing all this stuff. No one

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Speaker 2: was visiting his website. He was sleeping in his space

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Speaker 2: like he didn't have a place to live. He was

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Speaker 2: now sleeping where he taught, so he could just make

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Speaker 2: calculus videos just so.

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Speaker 1: Many every day now.

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Speaker 2: But instead of pitting his tutorials against the avalanche of

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Speaker 2: teaching videos that were already available online, Chang decided then

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Speaker 2: to give them a different kind of exposure and uploaded

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Speaker 2: the videos on porn Hub in May. We thought putting

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Speaker 2: our videos in the most jarring place, he said, of

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Speaker 2: the decision to shoot his content off to a platform

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Speaker 2: that's mostly known for sex. Over about a year, Chang

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Speaker 2: saw unprecedented traffic to his teaching material as more students

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Speaker 2: purchased the courses on his website. He also succeeded in

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Speaker 2: earning enough to pay off his debts. Yes, and then

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Speaker 2: Pornhub users loved it. Quote nothing like a nice delta

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Speaker 2: epsilon proof for my post nut clarity, a user wrote, God,

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Speaker 2: just a lot of comments like that. Sure, and so

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Speaker 2: now yeah, so I'm not going to read all the

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Speaker 2: rest of it, but yeah, that's the deal.

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Speaker 5: He was.

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Speaker 2: He was in a really bad place, and porn up

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Speaker 2: safe to him. Now he no longer puts his videos

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Speaker 2: on porn houpe. People just come and he teaches, he

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Speaker 2: tutors online.

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Speaker 1: Wow. And it's a beaut a happy ending.

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Speaker 2: Wow.

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Speaker 4: I mean I think it says something about just how

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Speaker 4: dark the Kinks have gotten that they made their way

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Speaker 4: back to math class.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, like yes that and just it's straight math class yeah.

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Speaker 4: Yeah not not not, you know, I mean it just

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Speaker 4: it feels like the cycle has has been completed, and

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Speaker 4: I just love It's like, you know, obviously the movie

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Speaker 4: Blow obviously, obviously the movie with Johnny Depp comes to mind,

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Speaker 4: you know, and it's like, don't take that last job,

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Speaker 4: get out, well you can, you know, and he does

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Speaker 4: and then he gets fucked. Like this professor, this now

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Speaker 4: teacher has given us like the perfect no you know,

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Speaker 4: no pun intended.

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Speaker 6: Happy ending or we were waiting for it, Hannah, wait

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Speaker 6: you know, you know I come with the goods and

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Speaker 6: he gave us the like yeah, and then I dabbled

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Speaker 6: in this and then I popped out and now I'm.

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Speaker 4: Just like back to.

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Speaker 2: Necessary but it means necessary good for him. I love it.

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Speaker 2: I love the idea of like trying to find because

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Speaker 2: I remember like that idea of like, how in what

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Speaker 2: way can I stand out from just like people doing

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Speaker 2: what I'm also doing.

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Speaker 1: It's so hard.

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Speaker 2: I remember when I was twenty two, my idea, my idea,

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Speaker 2: Oh boy, was this thing I made called Kurt Bot.

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Speaker 2: We just still my email address to this day. And

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Speaker 2: it was, when I say, not only confusing, it was confusing.

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Speaker 2: It was ill advised, it was upsetting, and I don't

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Speaker 2: think it exists anymore online. But we made these videos

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Speaker 2: where I was a Swedish robot gifted to New York

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Speaker 2: City by the King of Sweden to learn about American culture.

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Speaker 2: And I would just like walk on the street in

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Speaker 2: this like very dumb outfit and try and talk to

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Speaker 2: people in like a Swedish accent, and it was all, like,

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Speaker 2: you know, it was all a man on the street

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Speaker 2: like getting people to say things.

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Speaker 1: Sounds pretty tame to me. It was.

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Speaker 2: It was awful. It was just not funny.

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Speaker 1: It was weird.

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Speaker 2: It didn't make sense, and it made so many of

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Speaker 2: them when we spent so much time.

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Speaker 3: Billy on the street giving people money.

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Speaker 1: Exactly, it was not funny. Part that was the big problem.

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Speaker 4: I happened to know a website, Kurt that might be

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Speaker 4: a perfect home for something like that. Well, it's a

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Speaker 4: little website called pornhub dot com.

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Speaker 3: I'll try it. Let me see see what happens when

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Speaker 3: I put that. Oh god, oh god?

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Speaker 1: Is it other comedy sketches like mine? He's smiling, you

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Speaker 1: know it's some of them. They're pretty funny. That's amazing.

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Speaker 3: I had a kid in I was not good at math,

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Speaker 3: like a lot of people that become writers. And there

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Speaker 3: was a kid that used to come in high to

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Speaker 3: the trigonometry and put his head down and slept. He

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Speaker 3: never would take his jacket off. He would just like late,

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Speaker 3: and the teacher was like okay, and he would fill

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Speaker 3: out tests and get d's or whatever. And you could

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Speaker 3: see this nice teacher just tried by any means possible

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Speaker 3: to get this guy to study, and finally, late late

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Speaker 3: in the semester, she's like, Danny, don't you care about

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Speaker 3: not getting into a good school, Like you're never going

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Speaker 3: to get into a good college unless you apply yourself.

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Speaker 3: And I had never heard this kid talk before. And

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Speaker 3: he's like, that's not true. I'm going to apply to

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Speaker 3: Syracuse for turf studies and I'm going to get in

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Speaker 3: and go there.

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Speaker 1: And he fucking did.

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Speaker 3: He Absolutely, he got like pretty good SAT scores and

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Speaker 3: he had horrible grades, and he got into Syracuse for

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Speaker 3: turf studies and I guess he probably does golf courses

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Speaker 3: or whatever turf studies is. But when he told her that,

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Speaker 3: half the class booed him, like everybody was on the

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Speaker 3: teacher side.

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Speaker 1: So I did see.

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Speaker 3: I told you, I can't remember her name, but it

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Speaker 3: was like I got in miss trigonometry.

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Speaker 2: Oh really, he like went back and like showed her.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, he got into Towson University in Towson, Maryland, and

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Speaker 3: then you know where we were, and then he got

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Speaker 3: into Syracuse and everybody was like, boom, bad bad luck.

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Speaker 3: You're like bullying a teacher for being dumb. But I

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Speaker 3: never forgot it, so I don't know. I guess you've

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Speaker 3: lived in the Syracuse area and you hate the putting greens.

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Speaker 3: I'll give you this guy's yearbook photo, go find him.

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Speaker 4: I was similarly that at math. You know, amen, you

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Speaker 4: know what I mean. I feel like I have the

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Speaker 4: only memories I have kept and not blocked out from

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Speaker 4: my are of like English in history. You know, Like

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Speaker 4: I totally was just like I'll keep these nice teachers,

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Speaker 4: But like God, I mean, I feel like the only

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Speaker 4: memories I have are of the little idiosyncrasies that my

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Speaker 4: teachers had. Like there was one mister Waters who he

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Speaker 4: would always be eating and drinking coffee being during class

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Speaker 4: and you know, would never let us. What what is

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Speaker 4: that rule in school that you can't eat in class?

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Speaker 4: Like what is that even supposed to be about? Or

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Speaker 4: for Yeah, I don't know, was that enforced for you guys?

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, you couldn't have anything nothing?

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Speaker 4: What is that about? Especially for like ADHD kids who

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Speaker 4: need sort of some sort of like fixation.

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Speaker 3: Something to do. Yeah, they're just getting they can do

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Speaker 3: two things at once. Let them have it. I don't know,

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Speaker 3: but it wasn't it so weird because I had teachers

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Speaker 3: that would drink coffee class too, And there's something about

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Speaker 3: like teachers stained teeth when they're drinking coffee all the time.

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Speaker 3: You're like, that doesn't work anymore. We have HDTV now, guys,

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Speaker 3: But I just the whole science department were just like

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Speaker 3: mister brown tooth coming in brown on the substitute. I'm

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Speaker 3: also named mister Brown too. I drink black coffee.

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Speaker 4: Woh.

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Speaker 2: We had one guy, mister Smith literally mister Smith, and

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Speaker 2: he taught English, but.

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Speaker 1: He was like the classic. He was a hippie.

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Speaker 2: He was just like a straight hippie out of the

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Speaker 2: sixties and would wear orange orange glasses, like orange tinted

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Speaker 2: glasses at all times. Why and as you would come

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Speaker 2: into tea, as you would come in, he would always

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Speaker 2: be in with the emergency door open, smoking like smoking

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Speaker 2: up until the moment where he would teach, and then'd

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Speaker 2: teach while drinking coffee, and then the moment the bell

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Speaker 2: would ring, he would open the door again and like

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Speaker 2: smoke a cigarette.

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Speaker 1: It was amazing.

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Speaker 2: I was like, that doesn't happen anymore. That is that

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Speaker 2: is you're not allowed to do that. I don't think.

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Speaker 4: The best teacher that I ever had was a guy

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Speaker 4: named Dan Mariika, and he was He was like a

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Speaker 4: squat brunette with mutton chops and huge nerd like comic

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Speaker 4: con freak, and would always like come back from a

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Speaker 4: comic con weekend, be like, guys, we'll get to the

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Speaker 4: three in a sec because boy oh boy, like tell

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Speaker 4: all the stories. Brought a guitar to class, and by

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Speaker 4: the way, this is public school, okay. So he was

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Speaker 4: just like one of those guys who was really in

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Speaker 4: it for the right reasons. He was history teacher, doing

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Speaker 4: like making up original music to teach, you know, facts

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Speaker 4: about James Cape, Napoleon of the Stump, you know, just

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Speaker 4: like from North Carolina.

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Speaker 3: Retired after one term, he said, used to answer the

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Speaker 3: White House door by himself. Anyways, back to you.

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Speaker 4: Hannah Saudi, incredible mister can make his way over to

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Speaker 4: your town. Absolutely greatest hits. I mean, he just was

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Speaker 4: someone who like because obviously, I mean, I don't know,

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Speaker 4: I was really horrific in school. And good teachers matter

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Speaker 4: so much because there are so many who are like

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Speaker 4: such miserable people who like you know, and by the way,

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Speaker 4: you know, Ironbinder slam's public school teachers on podcasts. I'm

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Speaker 4: not saying keepers are bad, obviously, Like there are a

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Speaker 4: ton who you know, especially when you're not one of

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Speaker 4: the good kids, you know, yeah, when you're a when

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Speaker 4: you're an awesome, cool guy like you know we were.

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Speaker 4: It's just so important to have these good teachers.

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Speaker 2: Man, God, it's really amazing. I went to Catholic school,

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Speaker 2: and so it was half of the teachers were were brothers,

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Speaker 2: so they're essentially monks. Who had no passion for teaching

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Speaker 2: in any way, shape or form. They had a passion

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Speaker 2: to live away from society with other men.

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Speaker 1: That was their passion.

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Speaker 2: And then they and then they just got slotted in

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Speaker 2: to teach all of these adolescent children whatever I guess

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Speaker 2: they thought they knew. And every single brother who taught

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Speaker 2: was bad, and not just like a little bit bad.

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Speaker 2: They just they could have given a shit less if

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Speaker 2: anyone learned a thing.

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Speaker 1: It was.

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Speaker 2: I will always say it to my dying day. It's like,

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Speaker 2: is a bad system. It's a bad Christian Brothers Academy

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Speaker 2: in Lincroft, New Jersey. It's a bad system. It should

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Speaker 2: be all lay teachers. Let the brothers just sit in

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Speaker 2: their little houses and drink themselves to death.

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Speaker 1: All right, that's right. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: We had a guy my freshman year, our biology teachers

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Speaker 3: named mister Cassidy and handed. He was exactly like what

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Speaker 3: you're talking about, just an excellent teacher that went out

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Speaker 3: of his way to be interesting all the time. And

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Speaker 3: his big thing is he would hold a taxidermy blowfish

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Speaker 3: fully inflated, and he would talk to it about what

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Speaker 3: he was going to teach the class and then.

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Speaker 5: Tell him.

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00:21:22,359 --> 00:21:24,159
Speaker 3: A pop kiz and then he'd be like, because you

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Speaker 3: know tomorrow we're going to study eractids.

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Speaker 1: He's like, oh that sounds pretty good. Wow, that's awesome

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Speaker 1: and so.

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Speaker 3: And he also did one of the coolest things ever,

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Speaker 3: which we had the scantrons where the old tests were

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Speaker 3: the multiple choice tests, and we had a fifty question

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Speaker 3: test about biology and every answer was false, all fifty

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Speaker 3: or false. And he was doing it to like teach

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Speaker 3: us a lesson that like you have to like study,

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Speaker 3: you can't just go like a B A B, A

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Speaker 3: B A B or whatever. And it was by like

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Speaker 3: number thirty. I'm like this, this bastard is going to

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Speaker 3: put him all.

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Speaker 1: I love that. That's bold, mister Cassidy.

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Speaker 3: He left my school a couple of years after that

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Speaker 3: one somewhere else, but he a great great I put

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Speaker 3: him in every script. I think like if whenever I

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00:22:03,200 --> 00:22:05,720
Speaker 3: need a teacher character like guy talks to blowfish because

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Speaker 3: of mister Castle.

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Speaker 1: So I love that. Oh you want me to tease

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00:22:09,359 --> 00:22:12,040
Speaker 1: us into a little commercial break, Yeah, let's tease into

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00:22:12,040 --> 00:22:14,800
Speaker 1: a little commercial break. I would love it. Okay.

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Speaker 3: Car parked for forty seven years in same spot on

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Speaker 3: Italian Street, becomes a monument.

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Speaker 2: Oh, I love that. I'm excited about this one. Right

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Speaker 2: when we come back to.

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Speaker 5: Here knows.

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Speaker 2: We are back and Banana Scottie. Before we get back

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Speaker 2: to our guests, do you have any shout outs?

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Speaker 5: Kids?

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Speaker 3: I have a few shout outs because we forgot to

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Speaker 3: do it at our Fort Wayne shows. Thank you everybody

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00:23:07,359 --> 00:23:10,160
Speaker 3: came out to Fort Wayne, Indianapolis. We had a wonderful

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Speaker 3: time with everyone.

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Speaker 5: True.

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Speaker 3: I hope it'll be out soon feel our energy and

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00:23:14,840 --> 00:23:17,960
Speaker 3: for the Indianapolis crowd, we are sorry. The nice gentleman

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00:23:18,040 --> 00:23:20,760
Speaker 3: working the boards there forgot to push records. So you

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Speaker 3: saw an episode that nobody else will ever hear, and

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Speaker 3: it was a good, good episode.

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Speaker 2: It was one of our best live episodes and gone

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Speaker 2: to the winds of time.

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Speaker 3: With the wind we are here with our wonderful guest, Hannah. Hannah,

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Speaker 3: how you doing so far? Are you enjoying the Bananas podcast? Last,

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00:23:42,440 --> 00:23:44,960
Speaker 3: this is a little thing. Our fans are called bananimals.

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00:23:45,119 --> 00:23:46,880
Speaker 3: A lot of them like us to give shout outs.

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00:23:46,920 --> 00:23:49,639
Speaker 3: It's mostly birthday stuff and they're always belated because we

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00:23:49,680 --> 00:23:52,359
Speaker 3: record ahead of time. So hold on to your butt.

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00:23:52,800 --> 00:23:55,840
Speaker 3: Maddie W Six's one what's the shout out her brother Jackson,

440
00:23:56,359 --> 00:23:58,880
Speaker 3: who is a I think he's in college in Texas,

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00:23:58,880 --> 00:24:02,760
Speaker 3: but he's coming home from his freshman year for Thanksgiving.

442
00:24:02,880 --> 00:24:06,919
Speaker 3: Everybody in his family is so proud of him. And

443
00:24:07,000 --> 00:24:09,439
Speaker 3: his favorite movie is MA So he's my number one

444
00:24:09,440 --> 00:24:12,520
Speaker 3: favorite ban animal of all time because he has films

445
00:24:12,680 --> 00:24:16,280
Speaker 3: of all time. Angelique asked us to wish happy birthday

446
00:24:16,359 --> 00:24:19,800
Speaker 3: to her sister, Vanali or Vanali, who moved to Toronto

447
00:24:19,800 --> 00:24:23,320
Speaker 3: for grad school. And Vanali is obviously a genius because

448
00:24:23,440 --> 00:24:26,600
Speaker 3: she bought golf by Mary Roach. We had Mary Roach

449
00:24:26,680 --> 00:24:28,600
Speaker 3: on hand. If you've never read Mary Roach, she writes

450
00:24:28,640 --> 00:24:31,639
Speaker 3: the greatest books of all time. So happy birthday to

451
00:24:31,880 --> 00:24:37,560
Speaker 3: Vanali and enjoy golf. And one more happy birthday too.

452
00:24:37,680 --> 00:24:41,720
Speaker 3: I think it's Taylor. It's spelled t A l e R,

453
00:24:41,880 --> 00:24:48,000
Speaker 3: So we're going with Taylor. We're taller, could be taller, Okay, going.

454
00:24:47,880 --> 00:24:49,000
Speaker 1: Taylor from Sarah.

455
00:24:49,040 --> 00:24:51,679
Speaker 3: Sarah says, you went to Kurt shows in Denver and

456
00:24:51,720 --> 00:24:54,000
Speaker 3: they were excellent shows when he was recording a special,

457
00:24:54,240 --> 00:24:57,680
Speaker 3: So happy birthday to you. We'll just say taller Taylor.

458
00:24:58,000 --> 00:25:00,359
Speaker 1: Taller Taylor, Happy birthday every Batty.

459
00:25:01,080 --> 00:25:03,760
Speaker 2: Uh And of course we're here with Hannah Einbinder Scotti.

460
00:25:03,880 --> 00:25:05,399
Speaker 2: Get tell us what this is about.

461
00:25:05,760 --> 00:25:10,240
Speaker 1: I absolutely will while you get ready for that, Hannah.

462
00:25:10,280 --> 00:25:13,199
Speaker 2: When does season two of Hacks come out?

463
00:25:13,960 --> 00:25:16,760
Speaker 4: Season two? I don't know when it when it airs,

464
00:25:16,840 --> 00:25:22,000
Speaker 4: but we are as of today, we are about to

465
00:25:22,040 --> 00:25:23,159
Speaker 4: shoot in about two weeks.

466
00:25:23,359 --> 00:25:24,960
Speaker 1: That's exciting. Yeah.

467
00:25:25,119 --> 00:25:27,680
Speaker 2: Just so, do you stay in Las Vegas the whole

468
00:25:27,680 --> 00:25:30,000
Speaker 2: time or is it just exteriors in Vegas?

469
00:25:30,240 --> 00:25:32,600
Speaker 4: We just do the exteriors there. I mean last last

470
00:25:32,600 --> 00:25:34,399
Speaker 4: season we only did about four days total.

471
00:25:34,800 --> 00:25:38,919
Speaker 1: So yeah, we are huge.

472
00:25:39,000 --> 00:25:44,160
Speaker 3: Jen Statsky fans on this podcast, Power Writer for those

473
00:25:44,160 --> 00:25:46,040
Speaker 3: who don't know the name, Share one of the co

474
00:25:46,160 --> 00:25:49,560
Speaker 3: creators of Hacks, and she writes she's just a fantastic

475
00:25:49,640 --> 00:25:53,320
Speaker 3: writer and a great person. So you have a good

476
00:25:53,359 --> 00:25:56,920
Speaker 3: team there. And I want to pay you a compliment, Hannah.

477
00:25:57,119 --> 00:26:00,160
Speaker 3: I love Hacks, and I think as an actor you

478
00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:02,919
Speaker 3: some really incredible things. I think you're very natural and

479
00:26:02,960 --> 00:26:06,840
Speaker 3: you're never boring on screen, and you sometimes to play

480
00:26:06,840 --> 00:26:09,520
Speaker 3: it real. People play it too real and becomes dull.

481
00:26:09,640 --> 00:26:12,679
Speaker 3: But you were very watchable, very very good actor.

482
00:26:13,560 --> 00:26:17,119
Speaker 4: I appreciate you. The note that I got most frequently

483
00:26:17,880 --> 00:26:21,200
Speaker 4: when acting was Okay, great, let's try this one one

484
00:26:21,200 --> 00:26:29,199
Speaker 4: more time, just less sad. Look, you know, so we

485
00:26:29,280 --> 00:26:32,840
Speaker 4: got there, but I am I fear my original my

486
00:26:32,880 --> 00:26:36,160
Speaker 4: original instincts might have been dull, but with great direction,

487
00:26:36,240 --> 00:26:37,920
Speaker 4: there you go. You know.

488
00:26:38,040 --> 00:26:42,560
Speaker 2: I do think of the scene when you kind of

489
00:26:42,600 --> 00:26:45,800
Speaker 2: like finally go down and play some slot machines for

490
00:26:45,840 --> 00:26:48,560
Speaker 2: the first time and get some drinks, you know, and

491
00:26:48,600 --> 00:26:51,560
Speaker 2: that starts with a level of sadness and like hatred

492
00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:54,040
Speaker 2: for the place and then turns in a way that

493
00:26:54,200 --> 00:26:56,480
Speaker 2: is very subtle and very enjoyable.

494
00:26:56,880 --> 00:26:59,240
Speaker 4: Oh, I'm so glad that scene was so much fun.

495
00:26:59,280 --> 00:27:02,120
Speaker 4: I had to tell you. There must be hours upon

496
00:27:02,240 --> 00:27:07,439
Speaker 4: hours of footage of the entire cast just being so

497
00:27:07,640 --> 00:27:11,200
Speaker 4: hilarious and improvising together, and I just like, I'm hoping,

498
00:27:11,680 --> 00:27:14,760
Speaker 4: I'm hoping one day there will be a the Ultimate

499
00:27:14,840 --> 00:27:18,320
Speaker 4: hacks Blooper reel, because its real gold in there.

500
00:27:18,680 --> 00:27:22,800
Speaker 3: Just cut a wacky season, that's what it's like, Hacky

501
00:27:23,000 --> 00:27:25,399
Speaker 3: and it's just the wacky outtakes where we just recut

502
00:27:25,359 --> 00:27:27,720
Speaker 3: an entire parallel and you're like, this is what it

503
00:27:27,760 --> 00:27:28,280
Speaker 3: could have been.

504
00:27:28,320 --> 00:27:28,639
Speaker 1: Guys.

505
00:27:28,680 --> 00:27:31,639
Speaker 3: Anyway, Yeah, awesome show. If any of the animals haven't

506
00:27:31,640 --> 00:27:35,280
Speaker 3: seen hacks. I feel like you have binge it very

507
00:27:35,320 --> 00:27:37,320
Speaker 3: bingeable show on HBO.

508
00:27:37,760 --> 00:27:40,239
Speaker 2: Max is you call it HBO hacks and that's all

509
00:27:40,280 --> 00:27:40,640
Speaker 2: I'm saying.

510
00:27:41,320 --> 00:27:43,840
Speaker 3: Discussion right, ads, Okay here, thank you so much. I

511
00:27:43,920 --> 00:27:47,399
Speaker 3: did our part for forty seven years in the same spot.

512
00:27:47,840 --> 00:27:50,040
Speaker 3: So one car forty seven years, never moved on an

513
00:27:50,040 --> 00:27:52,640
Speaker 3: Italian street becomes a monument. This was sent in by

514
00:27:52,640 --> 00:27:55,240
Speaker 3: Taylor Aldrich and other A lot of been animals actually,

515
00:27:55,240 --> 00:27:58,520
Speaker 3: but Taylor was number one. This is from Insider dot com. Kurt,

516
00:27:58,560 --> 00:28:00,000
Speaker 3: how many times a day do you read inside?

517
00:28:01,119 --> 00:28:02,800
Speaker 2: I wake up in the morning and then I do

518
00:28:02,880 --> 00:28:05,640
Speaker 2: it once at lunchtime and then once at bedtime, so.

519
00:28:05,640 --> 00:28:08,360
Speaker 1: Three times, sometimes four if I'm feeling excited.

520
00:28:09,200 --> 00:28:12,600
Speaker 3: This is written by the very best writer on the intranet,

521
00:28:13,240 --> 00:28:17,720
Speaker 3: Aliyah Sho showeb Aliyah shoeb.

522
00:28:18,960 --> 00:28:21,639
Speaker 1: Aliah showeb Okay.

523
00:28:21,680 --> 00:28:23,159
Speaker 3: A car that has parked in the same place on

524
00:28:23,200 --> 00:28:25,639
Speaker 3: the street for forty seven years has become a tourist

525
00:28:25,720 --> 00:28:30,080
Speaker 3: attraction and a local landmark in Italy. In nineteen seventy four,

526
00:28:30,680 --> 00:28:34,840
Speaker 3: Angelo Frigoland now ninety four, parked it at the newstand

527
00:28:34,880 --> 00:28:39,560
Speaker 3: he ran with his wife in the town of Conigliano.

528
00:28:40,040 --> 00:28:43,000
Speaker 3: According to the mirror, and he and he never came

529
00:28:43,040 --> 00:28:44,200
Speaker 3: back for it.

530
00:28:44,200 --> 00:28:46,680
Speaker 2: He never came back, so he just left. And also

531
00:28:46,720 --> 00:28:49,200
Speaker 2: that they know whose car is my is my favorite.

532
00:28:48,920 --> 00:28:53,120
Speaker 4: Party and not a tow truck and all of the tech. No,

533
00:28:54,040 --> 00:28:57,280
Speaker 4: I mean you do that shit in La. It's gone

534
00:28:57,320 --> 00:29:02,200
Speaker 4: in thirty minutes, goddamn car compressor. Swisher.

535
00:29:04,040 --> 00:29:05,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, they don't even wait for you to pick it up.

536
00:29:05,800 --> 00:29:07,440
Speaker 1: They're just like we didn't disquish it.

537
00:29:07,800 --> 00:29:08,680
Speaker 6: You were a box.

538
00:29:09,000 --> 00:29:10,800
Speaker 4: There was ninety minutes left on the meter.

539
00:29:11,080 --> 00:29:14,920
Speaker 1: I had groceries in the backseat, swished my son.

540
00:29:15,320 --> 00:29:21,960
Speaker 3: Anyway, my son was holding the groceries. Free Golent left

541
00:29:22,000 --> 00:29:26,440
Speaker 3: his gray Lancia fol Via nineteen sixty two on the street.

542
00:29:26,960 --> 00:29:31,720
Speaker 2: Retired sounds sexual. It's sexual to corn Lancia.

543
00:29:32,520 --> 00:29:33,680
Speaker 1: Yeah.

544
00:29:33,720 --> 00:29:35,920
Speaker 3: The compact four door car has since become an attraction

545
00:29:36,000 --> 00:29:38,720
Speaker 3: for tourists and you and I will absolutely go see it. Kurt,

546
00:29:38,760 --> 00:29:41,640
Speaker 3: This is right up Ali towards you come to the

547
00:29:41,680 --> 00:29:44,040
Speaker 3: town to snap selfies and post on social media. The

548
00:29:44,160 --> 00:29:50,680
Speaker 3: vehicles even earned a marker on Google Maps. Uh Freealent said,

549
00:29:50,720 --> 00:29:53,520
Speaker 3: I ran the newstand under my house for forty years

550
00:29:53,560 --> 00:29:57,200
Speaker 3: together with my beautiful wife Bertilla ten years younger than me.

551
00:29:58,000 --> 00:29:59,680
Speaker 3: When I opened the business, I was happy to have

552
00:29:59,680 --> 00:30:01,760
Speaker 3: the land see a parked in front of it because

553
00:30:01,760 --> 00:30:03,840
Speaker 3: I had newspapers that I had to unload from the

554
00:30:03,880 --> 00:30:08,160
Speaker 3: trunk and take them inside. Then Bertilla jokes that the

555
00:30:09,360 --> 00:30:11,240
Speaker 3: that he loved the car like a second wife. I

556
00:30:11,240 --> 00:30:15,160
Speaker 3: guess he did. And after nearly five decades, town officials

557
00:30:15,200 --> 00:30:18,440
Speaker 3: decided to move the vehicle because it was blocking traffic

558
00:30:18,520 --> 00:30:20,200
Speaker 3: flow and pedestrians.

559
00:30:21,720 --> 00:30:23,760
Speaker 2: So it's moved to a new place and it's still

560
00:30:23,800 --> 00:30:25,959
Speaker 2: on the street, so they kept it on the street.

561
00:30:26,520 --> 00:30:32,720
Speaker 3: It actually was moved to on October twentieth. It was

562
00:30:32,840 --> 00:30:38,600
Speaker 3: moved to the Auto Emoto d the Paca, which is

563
00:30:38,640 --> 00:30:41,880
Speaker 3: a motor show in Padua for a short period of

564
00:30:41,880 --> 00:30:46,920
Speaker 3: time and now it's displayed among many classic cars. So

565
00:30:47,040 --> 00:30:49,400
Speaker 3: it's just basically in a museum of cars now, which

566
00:30:49,440 --> 00:30:51,160
Speaker 3: is so you can go see this car. And I

567
00:30:51,200 --> 00:30:55,280
Speaker 3: would recommend anybody going to Italy post great quarantine should.

568
00:30:56,240 --> 00:30:58,920
Speaker 2: Oh man, they should have put it like in a

569
00:30:59,000 --> 00:31:01,840
Speaker 2: in like applaza in that town. It should have just

570
00:31:01,840 --> 00:31:04,320
Speaker 2: they should have committed and just been like, people come

571
00:31:04,400 --> 00:31:07,480
Speaker 2: here to see this car. It's in a plaza. We

572
00:31:07,600 --> 00:31:10,280
Speaker 2: put it on a pedestal for no reason. It's just

573
00:31:10,360 --> 00:31:13,200
Speaker 2: a normal car. It's a Lancia Falvo.

574
00:31:13,480 --> 00:31:15,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's amazing.

575
00:31:15,600 --> 00:31:20,640
Speaker 3: So yeah, if you're ever in uh Connegliano, go see

576
00:31:20,840 --> 00:31:23,800
Speaker 3: the faultba for that is famous around the world.

577
00:31:24,480 --> 00:31:29,440
Speaker 1: I think that's nice. Wow, I love it. You like

578
00:31:29,520 --> 00:31:30,840
Speaker 1: it too. Hannah likes it.

579
00:31:30,920 --> 00:31:33,880
Speaker 3: She wants, she wants, she wishes on eBay motor so

580
00:31:33,960 --> 00:31:35,040
Speaker 3: she could be I think this.

581
00:31:35,040 --> 00:31:37,280
Speaker 4: Is travel episode.

582
00:31:37,520 --> 00:31:39,240
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I would love to.

583
00:31:39,240 --> 00:31:43,840
Speaker 4: Travel that that is. I mean, I just I literally

584
00:31:44,000 --> 00:31:47,000
Speaker 4: have to know how, I mean, how this happened, how

585
00:31:47,000 --> 00:31:51,200
Speaker 4: it stayed there that long? If the lore around the

586
00:31:51,240 --> 00:31:57,200
Speaker 4: person led to like is this news stand, you know, uh,

587
00:31:57,440 --> 00:32:02,480
Speaker 4: particularly central to the town, or you know the guy

588
00:32:02,520 --> 00:32:05,560
Speaker 4: who's always smiling? Or what is it the guy first

589
00:32:05,560 --> 00:32:06,520
Speaker 4: and then the car?

590
00:32:06,600 --> 00:32:06,840
Speaker 5: You know?

591
00:32:07,080 --> 00:32:09,360
Speaker 1: Like so or is it the car first?

592
00:32:09,840 --> 00:32:13,680
Speaker 4: Is the car person and the guy? I mean, I

593
00:32:14,080 --> 00:32:18,400
Speaker 4: feel I feel like the only time I see a

594
00:32:18,440 --> 00:32:22,280
Speaker 4: car truly parked the same spot all the time is

595
00:32:22,280 --> 00:32:26,120
Speaker 4: when it is also a residence. So the fact that.

596
00:32:26,040 --> 00:32:30,600
Speaker 2: She's Los Angeles, Los Angeles, the fact that he left

597
00:32:32,080 --> 00:32:33,040
Speaker 2: and that it stayed.

598
00:32:33,920 --> 00:32:36,000
Speaker 4: Did he leave his news stand as well?

599
00:32:36,040 --> 00:32:39,280
Speaker 3: Did he sell that I chose in the article and

600
00:32:39,320 --> 00:32:41,680
Speaker 3: there is a news stand near it. And the car

601
00:32:41,840 --> 00:32:44,400
Speaker 3: is like if you gave a child a great crayon

602
00:32:44,480 --> 00:32:45,560
Speaker 3: and said draw car.

603
00:32:45,760 --> 00:32:46,720
Speaker 1: It's like boxy.

604
00:32:46,960 --> 00:32:50,000
Speaker 3: It looks like a rector, like a trapezoid on the top,

605
00:32:50,360 --> 00:32:53,080
Speaker 3: and just certain debris and then flat tires.

606
00:32:53,120 --> 00:32:58,240
Speaker 1: It's incredible. I've told I've told a couple of stories

607
00:32:58,240 --> 00:32:58,760
Speaker 1: about this guy.

608
00:32:58,760 --> 00:33:01,440
Speaker 3: But there's a dude that lived in my college town

609
00:33:01,440 --> 00:33:03,600
Speaker 3: that was college age that didn't go to the college.

610
00:33:03,640 --> 00:33:06,720
Speaker 3: His name's Ozzy. He's six foot five, six foot six.

611
00:33:06,760 --> 00:33:09,280
Speaker 3: He had hair like a member of def Leppard. He

612
00:33:09,360 --> 00:33:11,320
Speaker 3: made his own clothes and he would fix cars for

613
00:33:11,440 --> 00:33:13,600
Speaker 3: people and then sell them to other college kids. He

614
00:33:13,720 --> 00:33:16,120
Speaker 3: was a very and he walked the Appalachian Trail once

615
00:33:16,120 --> 00:33:17,840
Speaker 3: and then stopped halfway. And I saw him at a

616
00:33:17,840 --> 00:33:19,440
Speaker 3: party and said, I thought, you're walking the trail and

617
00:33:19,440 --> 00:33:21,680
Speaker 3: he goes, Dude, it is just a lot of walking,

618
00:33:23,880 --> 00:33:24,480
Speaker 3: like yeah.

619
00:33:24,280 --> 00:33:26,600
Speaker 2: And that's like halfway through. So that's like a couple

620
00:33:26,720 --> 00:33:27,479
Speaker 2: months of walking.

621
00:33:27,640 --> 00:33:27,920
Speaker 1: Yes.

622
00:33:28,120 --> 00:33:30,720
Speaker 3: And he's done all these amazing stories, and I've told

623
00:33:30,760 --> 00:33:32,400
Speaker 3: some of them. You'd come over in the morning hand

624
00:33:32,440 --> 00:33:34,840
Speaker 3: on like weekends, and he would just let himself into

625
00:33:34,880 --> 00:33:36,520
Speaker 3: our house where I lived with a few other people,

626
00:33:36,600 --> 00:33:38,000
Speaker 3: and I would hear him and he would just make

627
00:33:38,080 --> 00:33:41,680
Speaker 3: himself two glasses of strawberry quick, like strawberry milk, and

628
00:33:41,720 --> 00:33:43,800
Speaker 3: then just sit there in silence and drink them until

629
00:33:43,800 --> 00:33:44,959
Speaker 3: I would come up and greet him.

630
00:33:45,000 --> 00:33:45,640
Speaker 1: He's a cool guy.

631
00:33:46,240 --> 00:33:49,880
Speaker 3: So he made a little bit of money and he

632
00:33:50,000 --> 00:33:52,880
Speaker 3: found a really cheap flight to Europe and he was

633
00:33:52,920 --> 00:33:55,000
Speaker 3: just going to backpack. He used to ride the rails

634
00:33:55,000 --> 00:33:57,080
Speaker 3: in the States all the time. He was just a

635
00:33:57,120 --> 00:34:00,760
Speaker 3: bohem a true bohemian, like a lost type of person.

636
00:34:02,680 --> 00:34:04,400
Speaker 3: And so he came back and we were like, how

637
00:34:04,440 --> 00:34:06,760
Speaker 3: is Europe? And it's good good, And then my buddy

638
00:34:06,880 --> 00:34:09,880
Speaker 3: Dave was like tell Scotti. And so he was in

639
00:34:10,080 --> 00:34:12,799
Speaker 3: France and he's hitch hiking and this man picks him

640
00:34:12,880 --> 00:34:15,160
Speaker 3: up in his car and he's like, where are you going?

641
00:34:15,200 --> 00:34:18,160
Speaker 3: He goes, I guess like Rome or Florence, somewhere in Italy.

642
00:34:18,200 --> 00:34:19,880
Speaker 3: And the guy's like okay, like he's like, get in,

643
00:34:19,920 --> 00:34:21,919
Speaker 3: I'm going that way. And so this Italian man picks

644
00:34:21,960 --> 00:34:24,440
Speaker 3: him up and they drive for three hours in silence,

645
00:34:24,560 --> 00:34:27,960
Speaker 3: complete silence, and then after three hours the man goes,

646
00:34:28,360 --> 00:34:37,040
Speaker 3: so will you suck my cock, and Ozzy goes no,

647
00:34:37,040 --> 00:34:43,280
Speaker 3: no man. Two more hours in silence, just just blocks

648
00:34:43,280 --> 00:34:46,640
Speaker 3: of silence, and in the middle a sexual Hey.

649
00:34:46,800 --> 00:34:48,560
Speaker 1: Will you suck my cock?

650
00:34:48,840 --> 00:34:51,439
Speaker 3: No, I'm good No, and then they just he didn't

651
00:34:51,440 --> 00:34:53,279
Speaker 3: get out of the car. He didn't after anything, it

652
00:34:53,320 --> 00:34:55,680
Speaker 3: didn't stop. It's just two more hours. And then he

653
00:34:55,719 --> 00:34:58,080
Speaker 3: got off. Then he just got out and rode for free.

654
00:34:58,160 --> 00:35:00,520
Speaker 3: So you know, we had a ne of a guy

655
00:35:00,760 --> 00:35:02,759
Speaker 3: wondering who we had just picked up. And then we

656
00:35:02,760 --> 00:35:04,960
Speaker 3: had Auzie just aloof and like, I just got to

657
00:35:04,960 --> 00:35:06,960
Speaker 3: get to row Man again.

658
00:35:07,080 --> 00:35:09,680
Speaker 4: Another story that truly could have been, should have gone

659
00:35:09,719 --> 00:35:13,080
Speaker 4: wrong and did not. Another fucking happy ending.

660
00:35:13,320 --> 00:35:19,960
Speaker 2: Another happy ending without an actual happy end. That's the

661
00:35:19,960 --> 00:35:23,000
Speaker 2: only time a happy ending comes from a not happy ending.

662
00:35:24,560 --> 00:35:27,480
Speaker 1: Do you want to hear a no one? Oh heck yo,

663
00:35:27,680 --> 00:35:29,160
Speaker 1: I'm having fun with you too.

664
00:35:29,960 --> 00:35:32,759
Speaker 2: Okay, here it goes, guys. Oh it's coming up.

665
00:35:33,280 --> 00:35:33,440
Speaker 1: Man.

666
00:35:33,600 --> 00:35:36,080
Speaker 3: If we ever do a live episode in Santa Barbara,

667
00:35:36,160 --> 00:35:37,759
Speaker 3: we would love for you to be a guest.

668
00:35:38,560 --> 00:35:41,440
Speaker 1: Oh my God, yes, together.

669
00:35:41,719 --> 00:35:44,520
Speaker 4: God, thank you.

670
00:35:45,480 --> 00:35:48,200
Speaker 2: Yes. Hard day for us too, Scotty. We just like

671
00:35:48,280 --> 00:35:50,680
Speaker 2: walked around getting drunk in Santa Barbara.

672
00:35:50,719 --> 00:35:53,720
Speaker 3: It was fantastic drank in a place with just tons

673
00:35:53,719 --> 00:35:57,279
Speaker 3: of aquariums, and then two hot tins over Sterno in

674
00:35:57,320 --> 00:35:59,160
Speaker 3: the middle of the day for only Kurt and I

675
00:35:59,280 --> 00:36:01,160
Speaker 3: like beef troke and off at two pm.

676
00:36:02,960 --> 00:36:03,840
Speaker 1: It was so weird.

677
00:36:05,040 --> 00:36:07,359
Speaker 4: I just have to ask you, Kurt, how do you

678
00:36:07,520 --> 00:36:10,440
Speaker 4: have a day like that and then have the stamina

679
00:36:10,560 --> 00:36:11,720
Speaker 4: to then do an hour?

680
00:36:12,320 --> 00:36:12,920
Speaker 5: Like what?

681
00:36:13,640 --> 00:36:15,080
Speaker 2: Alcohol gives me energy?

682
00:36:15,120 --> 00:36:17,040
Speaker 1: Weirdly? Yeah, it gives me a.

683
00:36:18,880 --> 00:36:20,600
Speaker 2: Not if I drink beer or anything, but if I'm

684
00:36:20,600 --> 00:36:24,880
Speaker 2: just drinking vodka SODA's it keeps me energized. It's my

685
00:36:25,280 --> 00:36:26,640
Speaker 2: it's my Yeah, I can totally.

686
00:36:28,640 --> 00:36:29,040
Speaker 1: I don't know.

687
00:36:29,080 --> 00:36:31,120
Speaker 2: I mean, like, was that set sloppy? I don't think

688
00:36:31,120 --> 00:36:34,880
Speaker 2: the set was all. It was fun, okay, great and

689
00:36:34,920 --> 00:36:36,840
Speaker 2: so yeah, I drank all day and then did that sat.

690
00:36:38,280 --> 00:36:40,480
Speaker 3: And the college girl that did like three minutes did

691
00:36:40,520 --> 00:36:42,799
Speaker 3: a great sho was good age, she was good.

692
00:36:43,880 --> 00:36:46,239
Speaker 4: Yeah, Well I love that. That's how I That's how

693
00:36:46,280 --> 00:36:48,640
Speaker 4: I got started. I was the college girl doing the

694
00:36:48,640 --> 00:36:51,719
Speaker 4: three minutes. When Nicole Byer came to my college. She

695
00:36:51,840 --> 00:36:54,279
Speaker 4: was nice, any of the kids on the improv team

696
00:36:54,360 --> 00:36:56,319
Speaker 4: want to open for me? And that it was me?

697
00:36:56,400 --> 00:36:57,479
Speaker 4: And so I saw her, and I.

698
00:36:57,400 --> 00:37:00,800
Speaker 2: Was like, oh, that's awesome.

699
00:37:01,280 --> 00:37:03,480
Speaker 3: I did it for Ralph Harris was the feature and

700
00:37:03,520 --> 00:37:06,960
Speaker 3: Colin Quinn was the headliner, and I O, way, it's.

701
00:37:06,800 --> 00:37:07,960
Speaker 1: True, and I made it.

702
00:37:08,000 --> 00:37:10,919
Speaker 3: Was supposed to be Andy Dick the entire time as

703
00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:14,439
Speaker 3: the headliner, and Coln Quinn subbed in at the last

704
00:37:14,440 --> 00:37:17,000
Speaker 3: second because I'm sure Andy Dick was doing something very healthy.

705
00:37:17,320 --> 00:37:20,759
Speaker 3: And when I was really nervous and I was like,

706
00:37:20,960 --> 00:37:23,080
Speaker 3: I think it might've been my first time doing stand up,

707
00:37:23,440 --> 00:37:25,799
Speaker 3: and Colin Quinn walks by from like the green room

708
00:37:25,800 --> 00:37:26,320
Speaker 3: to the stage.

709
00:37:26,360 --> 00:37:27,680
Speaker 1: I go, hey, it's Andy Dick.

710
00:37:27,760 --> 00:37:30,319
Speaker 3: And he cracked up laughing and like like patted me

711
00:37:30,360 --> 00:37:32,040
Speaker 3: on the elbow, and I was like.

712
00:37:32,040 --> 00:37:33,840
Speaker 1: Oh, oh that's great.

713
00:37:33,960 --> 00:37:35,239
Speaker 2: I was like, I'm going to do stand up for

714
00:37:35,280 --> 00:37:38,280
Speaker 2: one year and then quit. That's amazing that you guys

715
00:37:38,440 --> 00:37:40,520
Speaker 2: just did it in college. I didn't do stand up

716
00:37:40,560 --> 00:37:43,279
Speaker 2: until I was twenty nine years old. That was my

717
00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:44,600
Speaker 2: first stand Up's amazing.

718
00:37:44,600 --> 00:37:45,520
Speaker 1: How good you are at it.

719
00:37:46,200 --> 00:37:49,560
Speaker 4: Like a fine wine, Kurt, I.

720
00:37:49,560 --> 00:37:51,920
Speaker 2: Needed to have some lunaticies first.

721
00:37:52,000 --> 00:37:52,520
Speaker 1: Here we go.

722
00:37:53,719 --> 00:37:57,479
Speaker 2: This was sent in by Stephanie, who also known as

723
00:37:58,000 --> 00:38:05,120
Speaker 2: at Resumetz. This isn't the Guardian. This is a legit publication.

724
00:38:05,440 --> 00:38:12,560
Speaker 2: Here we go quote. He's like al Capone turkey on

725
00:38:12,680 --> 00:38:18,960
Speaker 2: the loose, ruffles feathers in Rhode Island town. This was

726
00:38:19,000 --> 00:38:23,919
Speaker 2: written by Adam Gabbatt. Thank you Adam Gabbatt. And they're

727
00:38:23,960 --> 00:38:26,360
Speaker 2: pronouncing it the way it looks. He's the best in

728
00:38:26,400 --> 00:38:30,840
Speaker 2: the business. At the beginning, the turkey was a mere curiosity,

729
00:38:30,880 --> 00:38:33,200
Speaker 2: of course. See now when you're going into The Guardian,

730
00:38:33,239 --> 00:38:35,280
Speaker 2: you know you're getting some real best in the biz writing.

731
00:38:35,400 --> 00:38:36,200
Speaker 1: Okay, there we go.

732
00:38:36,680 --> 00:38:39,160
Speaker 2: It had arrived in the town of Johnston, Rhode Island,

733
00:38:39,200 --> 00:38:41,480
Speaker 2: in May, along with two other birds and taking up

734
00:38:41,520 --> 00:38:48,080
Speaker 2: residents outside town hall, a real central location. Wild turkeys

735
00:38:48,120 --> 00:38:50,080
Speaker 2: aren't uncommon in this part of the world, but people

736
00:38:50,120 --> 00:38:52,960
Speaker 2: thought it unusual when the birds were still hanging around

737
00:38:53,040 --> 00:38:57,520
Speaker 2: days later. Locals quickly warned other neighbors. People took photos.

738
00:38:57,520 --> 00:38:59,759
Speaker 2: Someone even set up a Facebook page. It was all

739
00:38:59,760 --> 00:39:06,000
Speaker 2: good fun until the turkeys began meddling in the town's administrative.

740
00:39:06,960 --> 00:39:08,200
Speaker 1: Bum bum bum.

741
00:39:08,560 --> 00:39:11,440
Speaker 2: They were starting to interfere with the people coming in

742
00:39:11,480 --> 00:39:15,480
Speaker 2: to pay their taxes and do their business, said Joseph Poulisanya,

743
00:39:15,600 --> 00:39:16,800
Speaker 2: Johnson's mayor.

744
00:39:16,920 --> 00:39:17,320
Speaker 1: Mayor.

745
00:39:17,840 --> 00:39:22,400
Speaker 2: They were scaring people away. Pelasenia summoned animal control officers

746
00:39:22,440 --> 00:39:24,040
Speaker 2: and two of the birds were captured, but the third

747
00:39:24,040 --> 00:39:28,360
Speaker 2: bird escaped and six months later, is still wrecking havoc

748
00:39:28,520 --> 00:39:34,840
Speaker 2: on Johnston. Through summer and now approaching winter, the turkey

749
00:39:34,920 --> 00:39:38,440
Speaker 2: has brought traffic to a standstill with its brazen johnts

750
00:39:38,440 --> 00:39:42,840
Speaker 2: across local highways. It has pinned people inside their vehicles

751
00:39:42,840 --> 00:39:48,040
Speaker 2: with bouts of vicious pecking, and repeatedly outwitted local officials.

752
00:39:48,560 --> 00:39:51,120
Speaker 2: A look through the local newspaper shows the impact the

753
00:39:51,120 --> 00:39:54,080
Speaker 2: turkey has had on life in this otherwise quiet town.

754
00:39:54,200 --> 00:39:57,760
Speaker 2: Quote Johnston's troublesome turkey traps town worker in her car,

755
00:39:58,200 --> 00:40:02,960
Speaker 2: makes another getaway ince turtle, headlined August. Later that month,

756
00:40:03,000 --> 00:40:08,840
Speaker 2: the newspaper recorded the bird quote chasing a fireman. In October,

757
00:40:08,880 --> 00:40:11,920
Speaker 2: the Johnson Sun reported the birds made a clean getaway

758
00:40:11,960 --> 00:40:16,040
Speaker 2: from a quote early morning sting conducted by town official.

759
00:40:17,520 --> 00:40:20,560
Speaker 2: The turkey's exploit has won it a cult following in

760
00:40:20,719 --> 00:40:25,239
Speaker 2: Rhode Island. Quote this guy, he's like al Capone and

761
00:40:25,400 --> 00:40:30,000
Speaker 2: John Dillinger. He keeps getting away. The mayor said that

762
00:40:30,000 --> 00:40:35,680
Speaker 2: that is the mayor speaking for more years. Quote He's

763
00:40:35,719 --> 00:40:39,080
Speaker 2: smarter than the other two. The turkey has learned to

764
00:40:39,200 --> 00:40:44,080
Speaker 2: recognize animal control officer's vehicle and LUNs away what it approaches.

765
00:40:44,600 --> 00:40:48,840
Speaker 2: It has led to offers using an undercover vehicle to

766
00:40:49,000 --> 00:40:53,239
Speaker 2: track a turkey in a desperate effort to capture the bird.

767
00:40:53,320 --> 00:40:57,319
Speaker 2: Polasenya approve the purchase of a device which fires a

768
00:40:57,480 --> 00:41:04,399
Speaker 2: net cool and scooby Doo technology on this as well

769
00:41:04,400 --> 00:41:07,120
Speaker 2: as un possessing quick wits, the bird has a surprising

770
00:41:07,160 --> 00:41:10,040
Speaker 2: turn of speed. He's unbelievably fast, Polosania said.

771
00:41:10,520 --> 00:41:10,759
Speaker 5: Uh.

772
00:41:10,800 --> 00:41:14,520
Speaker 2: The turkey can also fly, which animal control officers are

773
00:41:14,600 --> 00:41:19,759
Speaker 2: unable to do, and has taken to sleeping on a

774
00:41:19,760 --> 00:41:24,360
Speaker 2: telephone pole or in a tree, further complicating attempts at capture.

775
00:41:24,600 --> 00:41:28,720
Speaker 2: Leave it alone, and here's why it attacks cars.

776
00:41:29,280 --> 00:41:30,200
Speaker 1: This is the best part.

777
00:41:30,719 --> 00:41:34,320
Speaker 2: If it sees its reflection in our door or window,

778
00:41:34,520 --> 00:41:39,000
Speaker 2: it will essentially attack the car. Yes, for another, if

779
00:41:39,040 --> 00:41:42,279
Speaker 2: you stopping traffic and Polsnia is concerned there could be

780
00:41:42,320 --> 00:41:46,120
Speaker 2: an accident. Uh so yeah, so that the bird is

781
00:41:46,160 --> 00:41:50,239
Speaker 2: still at large terrorizing the thing.

782
00:41:51,160 --> 00:41:55,200
Speaker 3: Yes, this is actually a credit to humanity that we

783
00:41:55,760 --> 00:41:59,520
Speaker 3: that people. Okay, if a turkey is chasing you, you

784
00:41:59,560 --> 00:42:03,320
Speaker 3: can you could kill that turkey right right, This running

785
00:42:03,320 --> 00:42:06,320
Speaker 3: from a turkey is actually showing a kindness and a

786
00:42:06,440 --> 00:42:09,560
Speaker 3: jet You're not trying to hurt this animal. They could

787
00:42:09,560 --> 00:42:11,520
Speaker 3: just walk out and shoot this thing. I think this

788
00:42:11,600 --> 00:42:13,719
Speaker 3: is kind of a beautiful story about a local town

789
00:42:13,760 --> 00:42:17,160
Speaker 3: that is afraid to hurt another animal, that is running

790
00:42:17,160 --> 00:42:19,160
Speaker 3: for their lives and not just driving over it with

791
00:42:19,239 --> 00:42:24,239
Speaker 3: their car. There's something beautiful about the empathy that they go, Yes,

792
00:42:24,280 --> 00:42:26,279
Speaker 3: we could easily smash this thing with the rock, but

793
00:42:26,400 --> 00:42:28,480
Speaker 3: instead we're running away.

794
00:42:28,640 --> 00:42:29,720
Speaker 1: I think that's nice.

795
00:42:30,960 --> 00:42:34,040
Speaker 4: The timing of this article is perfect, obviously Thanksgiving right

796
00:42:34,040 --> 00:42:37,560
Speaker 4: around the coming right up and around this time of

797
00:42:37,680 --> 00:42:41,960
Speaker 4: year we do see all of the peda organizations, you

798
00:42:42,000 --> 00:42:45,880
Speaker 4: know going. Turkeys can cuddle just like dogs, you know,

799
00:42:47,680 --> 00:42:51,600
Speaker 4: rog and so like this is I mean to me,

800
00:42:51,960 --> 00:42:55,839
Speaker 4: these three turkeys, this is an action film. Okay, they

801
00:42:55,880 --> 00:43:01,840
Speaker 4: are avenging, they're fallen brethren. We've got Dwayne the Turkey Johnson,

802
00:43:01,960 --> 00:43:11,879
Speaker 4: We've got Turkey Ryan Reynolds, Turkey Galgado and and the

803
00:43:11,880 --> 00:43:16,720
Speaker 4: three stars are truly you know, this is a turkey

804
00:43:16,800 --> 00:43:20,359
Speaker 4: crime fighting. Uh, it's in glorious turkeys is what it is.

805
00:43:21,920 --> 00:43:27,120
Speaker 4: They're coming, you know for humanity because we have wronged

806
00:43:27,200 --> 00:43:29,839
Speaker 4: them by and this is the one turkey that can't

807
00:43:29,840 --> 00:43:35,239
Speaker 4: be turkey tamed and he is definitely And I'm just

808
00:43:35,239 --> 00:43:38,680
Speaker 4: saying that this is so incredible. And by the way,

809
00:43:39,400 --> 00:43:42,600
Speaker 4: they're clearly smart. Like I'm not even going to come

810
00:43:42,640 --> 00:43:45,000
Speaker 4: on here and be like the vegan person who's like,

811
00:43:45,080 --> 00:43:49,439
Speaker 4: you know whatever, but like, this is a an intelligent being.

812
00:43:49,560 --> 00:43:53,000
Speaker 4: First of all, it recognizes its own reflection and clearly

813
00:43:53,080 --> 00:43:55,959
Speaker 4: has some self esteem issues.

814
00:43:56,000 --> 00:43:59,600
Speaker 1: It hates itself deeply, itself.

815
00:43:59,760 --> 00:44:02,640
Speaker 4: You know, deeply. What's that I identify with that? You know,

816
00:44:03,920 --> 00:44:05,960
Speaker 4: I'm going is this my cousin? How you know we

817
00:44:06,000 --> 00:44:09,279
Speaker 4: are related somehow? But I just have to say that

818
00:44:09,320 --> 00:44:12,840
Speaker 4: this turkey is is very clearly sending a powerful message

819
00:44:12,920 --> 00:44:14,719
Speaker 4: that you know they are.

820
00:44:15,360 --> 00:44:16,440
Speaker 1: Look they are.

821
00:44:17,760 --> 00:44:19,760
Speaker 4: It's a level playing field between us.

822
00:44:19,840 --> 00:44:20,040
Speaker 1: Yeah.

823
00:44:21,080 --> 00:44:25,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, and birds are far more powerful than I think

824
00:44:25,239 --> 00:44:27,200
Speaker 2: most people think they are.

825
00:44:27,800 --> 00:44:28,920
Speaker 1: Yeah that's.

826
00:44:32,520 --> 00:44:32,960
Speaker 4: Crows.

827
00:44:33,440 --> 00:44:37,319
Speaker 2: Yeah, clothes so smart? Oh are you kidding me? We

828
00:44:37,360 --> 00:44:42,000
Speaker 2: talk about crows on this podcast should be legal. It's disturbing.

829
00:44:42,560 --> 00:44:46,279
Speaker 2: I love how smart crows are. But remember I was

830
00:44:46,280 --> 00:44:50,480
Speaker 2: in Edinburgh in two thousand and four, was there for

831
00:44:50,560 --> 00:44:56,719
Speaker 2: the festival doing show and uh, and my buddy Ptolemy.

832
00:44:56,920 --> 00:44:59,359
Speaker 2: We had just gotten there, so we have flown over,

833
00:45:00,120 --> 00:45:03,560
Speaker 2: haven't slept. It's like eleven and am in the morning.

834
00:45:03,520 --> 00:45:05,960
Speaker 2: You're gonna have to wait a couple hours until we

835
00:45:06,000 --> 00:45:10,440
Speaker 2: can check into our flat, and so we're just stuck outside.

836
00:45:10,520 --> 00:45:13,279
Speaker 2: It's cold and we're just kind of like shivering and

837
00:45:13,440 --> 00:45:16,480
Speaker 2: like like wired, and so we go. We go for

838
00:45:16,560 --> 00:45:18,960
Speaker 2: a walk in this little park that they have down

839
00:45:19,000 --> 00:45:22,160
Speaker 2: the hill in Edinburgh and a lot of swans, a

840
00:45:22,200 --> 00:45:24,759
Speaker 2: lot of swans, and we watch a swan kind of

841
00:45:24,760 --> 00:45:30,520
Speaker 2: like chase a little kid. And Ptolemy jokingly to me, goes,

842
00:45:30,880 --> 00:45:35,560
Speaker 2: I'm gonna punch that swan in the face. And he's joking,

843
00:45:36,040 --> 00:45:37,960
Speaker 2: but then he like, but he's doing a bit and

844
00:45:38,000 --> 00:45:40,120
Speaker 2: I'm like, I'm like, Tommy, don't punch that swan in

845
00:45:40,160 --> 00:45:42,719
Speaker 2: the face. It's probably illegal here in Scotland. He's like,

846
00:45:42,960 --> 00:45:46,960
Speaker 2: I'm gonna punch that swan in the face. And I'm like, Tommy,

847
00:45:47,040 --> 00:45:49,000
Speaker 2: don't do it, man, And then he like he's like,

848
00:45:49,040 --> 00:45:50,759
Speaker 2: oh yeah, you don't think I'm gonna do it, and

849
00:45:50,800 --> 00:45:53,560
Speaker 2: then he starts walking up to this swan as if

850
00:45:53,560 --> 00:45:55,960
Speaker 2: he's gonna punch the swan in the face and he

851
00:45:56,040 --> 00:45:59,640
Speaker 2: gets like, and this was Tolemmy, it commits to a bit.

852
00:46:00,560 --> 00:46:02,960
Speaker 2: And he commits to a bit in a way that

853
00:46:03,080 --> 00:46:06,239
Speaker 2: I've never seen anybody commit to a bit. Hill And

854
00:46:06,280 --> 00:46:08,440
Speaker 2: he's different. Now he's changed and he's grown up. But

855
00:46:08,480 --> 00:46:11,200
Speaker 2: when we were in our twenties, he would commit to

856
00:46:11,239 --> 00:46:14,480
Speaker 2: a bit and burn a friendship. He would burn a

857
00:46:14,560 --> 00:46:17,719
Speaker 2: long term friendship because he was committing to the bit.

858
00:46:17,800 --> 00:46:19,719
Speaker 2: He was just like, the bit is more important. They're

859
00:46:19,719 --> 00:46:22,719
Speaker 2: gonna forgive me eventually, but I need to commit. So

860
00:46:22,760 --> 00:46:25,240
Speaker 2: he's walking and he's getting really close to this swan

861
00:46:25,960 --> 00:46:28,200
Speaker 2: and then he gets and then he gets down so

862
00:46:28,239 --> 00:46:30,920
Speaker 2: that he's at the height level of the swan. The

863
00:46:30,920 --> 00:46:32,960
Speaker 2: swan's just like looking at him, and he's got his

864
00:46:33,040 --> 00:46:35,479
Speaker 2: like fit. His duke's up like he's gonna like fight

865
00:46:35,560 --> 00:46:39,799
Speaker 2: the swan. And then this swan just fucking shoots its

866
00:46:39,920 --> 00:46:45,480
Speaker 2: neck out and grabs his nipple. You just here, Tobby like,

867
00:46:48,840 --> 00:46:51,600
Speaker 2: and then the swan and then he gets away from

868
00:46:51,600 --> 00:46:54,719
Speaker 2: the swan, and then the swan chases us until we

869
00:46:54,840 --> 00:46:59,279
Speaker 2: leave the bark. It just kept coming after us the

870
00:46:59,320 --> 00:47:05,799
Speaker 2: whole time, and we had to leave the park. It

871
00:47:05,880 --> 00:47:07,960
Speaker 2: was swans are I mean swans are of course they're

872
00:47:08,000 --> 00:47:11,280
Speaker 2: They're famous for being assholes, but they are also very powerful.

873
00:47:11,320 --> 00:47:11,720
Speaker 1: Assholes.

874
00:47:11,760 --> 00:47:15,000
Speaker 4: Don't talk with birds. They will be the last beings

875
00:47:15,040 --> 00:47:18,839
Speaker 4: to survive, you know, the rivers of lava. They will

876
00:47:18,920 --> 00:47:22,440
Speaker 4: be flight you know when it.

877
00:47:22,480 --> 00:47:23,680
Speaker 1: All first down.

878
00:47:24,320 --> 00:47:26,759
Speaker 2: Were the first, the dinosaurs, and they will be the last.

879
00:47:26,840 --> 00:47:28,359
Speaker 2: They say cockroaches.

880
00:47:27,800 --> 00:47:28,680
Speaker 1: Will inherit the earth.

881
00:47:29,120 --> 00:47:30,840
Speaker 2: It's pigeons. It's pigeons.

882
00:47:31,360 --> 00:47:33,319
Speaker 4: Cockroaches. They do have wings, do they not?

883
00:47:33,880 --> 00:47:38,319
Speaker 3: Some do. We're going to get it coming and going

884
00:47:38,440 --> 00:47:40,759
Speaker 3: from from nature pretty soon. I could feel it.

885
00:47:41,320 --> 00:47:46,080
Speaker 4: Birds and birds, and I do want to ask that

886
00:47:46,800 --> 00:47:47,920
Speaker 4: to the cockroaches.

887
00:47:47,960 --> 00:47:52,359
Speaker 1: Birds. That's the type everybody, please this episode, he's right in.

888
00:47:52,440 --> 00:47:54,280
Speaker 4: Whether or not you think cockroaches are birds.

889
00:47:54,440 --> 00:47:57,359
Speaker 3: I'm a big fan of, uh, not having your phone

890
00:47:57,360 --> 00:47:59,040
Speaker 3: out when you're doing stuff, you know, like when you're

891
00:47:59,040 --> 00:48:01,200
Speaker 3: out in the world and you're trying to experience something.

892
00:48:01,239 --> 00:48:04,320
Speaker 1: And it backfired on me so hard. I was in Portugal.

893
00:48:04,480 --> 00:48:07,160
Speaker 3: They have a really great aquarium and Lisbon I had

894
00:48:07,160 --> 00:48:08,719
Speaker 3: like I was there for a couple extra days.

895
00:48:08,800 --> 00:48:10,200
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm gonna go check that out.

896
00:48:10,600 --> 00:48:13,400
Speaker 3: And I go and a little penguin just swam and

897
00:48:13,480 --> 00:48:16,360
Speaker 3: jumped right out of the water and over a little

898
00:48:16,400 --> 00:48:19,160
Speaker 3: plastic shield and then just landed on its belly, stood

899
00:48:19,200 --> 00:48:20,920
Speaker 3: up and just walked around and looked at us. And

900
00:48:20,960 --> 00:48:23,359
Speaker 3: by the time I got my phone out, like one

901
00:48:23,440 --> 00:48:25,080
Speaker 3: of the people that worked there just picked it up

902
00:48:25,120 --> 00:48:26,920
Speaker 3: and tossed it back in. I was like, that was

903
00:48:27,000 --> 00:48:30,319
Speaker 3: my moment to go viral, and I blew it and

904
00:48:30,400 --> 00:48:32,200
Speaker 3: I'm old, but it was adorable.

905
00:48:32,239 --> 00:48:37,839
Speaker 1: It's like Mary Poppins right before my very eyes. Oh

906
00:48:37,880 --> 00:48:39,080
Speaker 1: my god, I love that so much.

907
00:48:39,160 --> 00:48:40,880
Speaker 2: Give me, give us one more, see if we can

908
00:48:40,880 --> 00:48:44,080
Speaker 2: get a more in before we release Hannah back into

909
00:48:44,080 --> 00:48:44,560
Speaker 2: the wild.

910
00:48:45,280 --> 00:48:49,919
Speaker 3: This one is a hack space story. There's great there's

911
00:48:49,960 --> 00:48:53,840
Speaker 3: a great moment when your character Eva tells Deborah about uh,

912
00:48:53,920 --> 00:48:57,240
Speaker 3: just a little exchange about wiki feet and that she's

913
00:48:57,320 --> 00:48:58,960
Speaker 3: on it, and you get a laugh out of it.

914
00:48:59,120 --> 00:49:00,719
Speaker 1: So here we you go.

915
00:49:01,640 --> 00:49:05,160
Speaker 3: This was sentenced by Natty Cakes, Natty Underscore Cakes and

916
00:49:05,239 --> 00:49:08,000
Speaker 3: Atti Underscore Cakes Underscore Thank you so much.

917
00:49:08,000 --> 00:49:12,759
Speaker 1: Natty Cakes. Written by Cindy Tran Curdie b M.

918
00:49:13,600 --> 00:49:15,920
Speaker 5: Bess Best.

919
00:49:16,800 --> 00:49:18,880
Speaker 3: He only does that voice when it's true. This was

920
00:49:18,920 --> 00:49:24,399
Speaker 3: on MSN dot Com. Shoppers share awkward experience they have

921
00:49:24,520 --> 00:49:27,080
Speaker 3: with eight dollars sandals from Australian kmart.

922
00:49:27,719 --> 00:49:30,080
Speaker 1: Uh oh, what what would it be?

923
00:49:30,239 --> 00:49:33,640
Speaker 3: Shoppers have revealed the awkward problem they experience every time

924
00:49:33,680 --> 00:49:37,240
Speaker 3: they walk in their eight dollars sandals from kmart. Also

925
00:49:37,280 --> 00:49:40,440
Speaker 3: news to the world kmart still exists. A group of

926
00:49:40,480 --> 00:49:44,560
Speaker 3: Australian women share their amusing confessions after they all discovered

927
00:49:44,600 --> 00:49:49,799
Speaker 3: their double buckle footbed slides created a farting noise. The

928
00:49:49,920 --> 00:49:52,799
Speaker 3: budget buy has been popular among shoppers, especially because they

929
00:49:52,840 --> 00:49:57,120
Speaker 3: look remarkably similar to Birkenstock sandals, which cost between ninety

930
00:49:57,160 --> 00:49:59,359
Speaker 3: and two hundred and thirty five dollars. That is too

931
00:49:59,440 --> 00:50:03,640
Speaker 3: much first, By the way, those who opted for the

932
00:50:03,680 --> 00:50:06,719
Speaker 3: cheap alternatives shared the same dilemma. How do you make

933
00:50:06,760 --> 00:50:09,439
Speaker 3: these slides stop sounding like you're farting with every damn

934
00:50:09,480 --> 00:50:10,120
Speaker 3: step you take?

935
00:50:10,200 --> 00:50:12,799
Speaker 1: One woman wrote in a Facebook group, cool Facebook group,

936
00:50:12,800 --> 00:50:15,520
Speaker 1: by the way, cool Facebook group. Reason to get back

937
00:50:15,560 --> 00:50:16,480
Speaker 1: on Zucker book.

938
00:50:16,719 --> 00:50:19,560
Speaker 2: It's called farting shoes and you can just hop in

939
00:50:19,680 --> 00:50:20,440
Speaker 2: you can join.

940
00:50:20,719 --> 00:50:25,319
Speaker 3: H and another wrote, oh my god, I have a

941
00:50:25,360 --> 00:50:27,640
Speaker 3: pair of these and I walk so awkwardly just to

942
00:50:27,680 --> 00:50:28,880
Speaker 3: stop the foot farts.

943
00:50:29,600 --> 00:50:30,959
Speaker 1: Oh god, this is real.

944
00:50:31,120 --> 00:50:33,879
Speaker 3: Another one said, I embrace the fart sounds because they're

945
00:50:33,880 --> 00:50:35,000
Speaker 3: such comfy shoes.

946
00:50:35,160 --> 00:50:38,520
Speaker 1: She's a winner. I like that person. I cool.

947
00:50:40,239 --> 00:50:43,600
Speaker 3: Fart wall. You're wearing the shoes and blame the shoes,

948
00:50:43,640 --> 00:50:46,040
Speaker 3: said another. Now see these are the ones with the

949
00:50:46,120 --> 00:50:50,120
Speaker 3: positive spin. One woman came up with a simple solution

950
00:50:50,160 --> 00:50:52,799
Speaker 3: to get rid of the unpleasant sound for those who

951
00:50:52,880 --> 00:50:56,120
Speaker 3: had an issue with their Kmart sandals making farting noises.

952
00:50:56,280 --> 00:50:58,920
Speaker 3: Simply pierced the arch of the sandal a few times

953
00:50:58,960 --> 00:51:01,440
Speaker 3: with a scissor. It will leave holes in your shoes

954
00:51:01,440 --> 00:51:03,439
Speaker 3: that no one will see, but when you wear them,

955
00:51:03,480 --> 00:51:04,520
Speaker 3: you won't fart.

956
00:51:04,960 --> 00:51:08,600
Speaker 2: Oh wow, it's an actual air going in and out

957
00:51:08,640 --> 00:51:11,600
Speaker 2: of a plastic Yeah.

958
00:51:12,520 --> 00:51:16,200
Speaker 3: So some suggested that the shoppers invest in a reputable brand.

959
00:51:16,360 --> 00:51:18,960
Speaker 3: I wonder who.

960
00:51:18,719 --> 00:51:21,480
Speaker 2: That's mister Berkenstock getting on the Facebook group.

961
00:51:21,400 --> 00:51:29,040
Speaker 3: Dave and Janice Birkenstock monitoring fish janis, some said by Birkenstocks,

962
00:51:29,840 --> 00:51:32,400
Speaker 3: and then a woman responded in the Facebook group, my

963
00:51:32,600 --> 00:51:35,640
Speaker 3: Birkenstocks make the same farting noises as well.

964
00:51:37,040 --> 00:51:40,680
Speaker 1: I thought it was just me. So there you go.

965
00:51:40,960 --> 00:51:44,080
Speaker 1: You're not alone in Australia if you shop at kmart.

966
00:51:44,360 --> 00:51:46,880
Speaker 4: Okay, So I'm in New York City and I'm sitting

967
00:51:46,880 --> 00:51:49,919
Speaker 4: on the subway and you know, this was a while ago,

968
00:51:50,200 --> 00:51:52,359
Speaker 4: and you know, I'm a single, young broad and so

969
00:51:52,600 --> 00:51:54,880
Speaker 4: when the door's open, you just hope you'll see someone

970
00:51:54,960 --> 00:51:58,399
Speaker 4: on the other side walking through the threshold. That's interesting. Absolutely,

971
00:51:59,440 --> 00:52:01,920
Speaker 4: this gentle and comes in and he's very dashing, and

972
00:52:01,960 --> 00:52:05,000
Speaker 4: I've first taken by his scent. There is a washing

973
00:52:05,200 --> 00:52:07,960
Speaker 4: of whatever his scent is, I don't know, a car noir,

974
00:52:08,680 --> 00:52:11,000
Speaker 4: a little bit of a little bit of a pheromone.

975
00:52:11,760 --> 00:52:19,439
Speaker 4: I don't know, you know, whether that's natural or fragrance. Yes, yes, yes,

976
00:52:19,480 --> 00:52:27,680
Speaker 4: the cheese. And I'm sitting there and I'm looking at him,

977
00:52:27,680 --> 00:52:31,279
Speaker 4: and he, you know, kind of acknowledges me, and I

978
00:52:31,320 --> 00:52:33,719
Speaker 4: acknowledge him, and I'm going, okay, is this is this

979
00:52:33,880 --> 00:52:36,160
Speaker 4: the is this the beginning of Is this the start

980
00:52:36,200 --> 00:52:42,800
Speaker 4: of something new? And he takes out his phone and

981
00:52:44,320 --> 00:52:48,120
Speaker 4: he looks around and I see that he's taking a

982
00:52:48,160 --> 00:52:53,719
Speaker 4: picture of something. And I look to my right and

983
00:52:53,800 --> 00:52:57,600
Speaker 4: there is a woman who is wearing birkenstocks.

984
00:52:57,719 --> 00:52:59,600
Speaker 1: Okay, and he is.

985
00:52:59,719 --> 00:53:06,120
Speaker 4: Very clearly taking a picture of her feet, a picture

986
00:53:06,160 --> 00:53:08,120
Speaker 4: of her feet, And I'm going, okay, well, what's wrong

987
00:53:08,160 --> 00:53:11,080
Speaker 4: with me because I was on a chemical level attracted

988
00:53:11,080 --> 00:53:11,680
Speaker 4: to this person.

989
00:53:13,680 --> 00:53:16,319
Speaker 7: So I had to unpack that. But yeah, you know

990
00:53:16,360 --> 00:53:19,160
Speaker 7: they're out there. Yeah, in New York that does happen

991
00:53:19,160 --> 00:53:21,319
Speaker 7: a lot. But also anybody that were sandals in New

992
00:53:21,400 --> 00:53:25,400
Speaker 7: York City, we should talk offline about that because it's interesting.

993
00:53:25,520 --> 00:53:30,279
Speaker 7: We don't blackened toes from the degree that just is

994
00:53:30,320 --> 00:53:31,360
Speaker 7: in every direction.

995
00:53:31,960 --> 00:53:35,520
Speaker 2: It really is alarming. I think I met I've met one.

996
00:53:36,000 --> 00:53:39,200
Speaker 2: I met one person on the subway that I ended updating,

997
00:53:39,320 --> 00:53:43,000
Speaker 2: and it was like just like subway, Hey, how you doing,

998
00:53:43,120 --> 00:53:45,480
Speaker 2: you know that sort of thing, and it then she

999
00:53:45,560 --> 00:53:49,280
Speaker 2: turns out that she lived directly across the street from me. Wow,

1000
00:53:49,400 --> 00:53:51,920
Speaker 2: And we saw each other for like six months or

1001
00:53:51,920 --> 00:53:56,000
Speaker 2: something and then broke up. And then uh, it was

1002
00:53:56,160 --> 00:53:59,480
Speaker 2: just she just directly across the street for so we

1003
00:53:59,520 --> 00:54:00,000
Speaker 2: took this.

1004
00:54:00,440 --> 00:54:02,560
Speaker 1: Train every single day.

1005
00:54:03,120 --> 00:54:03,400
Speaker 4: Shit.

1006
00:54:03,760 --> 00:54:07,200
Speaker 2: Fuck, she's doing very well now she's well.

1007
00:54:07,120 --> 00:54:12,200
Speaker 1: She's still riding that train. Good for her, Good for her.

1008
00:54:12,360 --> 00:54:14,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, guys, don't take pictures of women's feet that aren't

1009
00:54:14,560 --> 00:54:16,320
Speaker 3: asking to take pictures. There was a guy on a

1010
00:54:16,360 --> 00:54:19,800
Speaker 3: subway train. Uh, and my next girlfriend when I lived

1011
00:54:20,200 --> 00:54:22,719
Speaker 3: in Brooklyn was like, that guy's been filming me the

1012
00:54:22,880 --> 00:54:24,080
Speaker 3: entire time, and he.

1013
00:54:24,640 --> 00:54:25,880
Speaker 1: Kind of was. I could tell.

1014
00:54:26,160 --> 00:54:28,719
Speaker 3: So I suddenly start walking behind him just so like

1015
00:54:28,840 --> 00:54:31,319
Speaker 3: makes to see if he really was. And then when

1016
00:54:31,320 --> 00:54:33,760
Speaker 3: I got close enough, he realized, so he just started rotating.

1017
00:54:33,760 --> 00:54:36,160
Speaker 3: So then I'm circling around and he's just rotating around.

1018
00:54:36,239 --> 00:54:39,360
Speaker 3: So it's just one guy orbiting another guy hiding his phone.

1019
00:54:39,840 --> 00:54:41,840
Speaker 3: And finally I'm like, fucking knock it off. He's like,

1020
00:54:41,840 --> 00:54:43,719
Speaker 3: I don't know what you're talking about, and just walked again.

1021
00:54:43,800 --> 00:54:46,520
Speaker 3: But for at least two full rotations there were two

1022
00:54:46,600 --> 00:54:50,719
Speaker 3: men just pirouetting together. She wasn't wearing sandals, she was

1023
00:54:50,800 --> 00:54:54,840
Speaker 3: just looking like a normal person doing her thing. Guys, guys,

1024
00:54:54,840 --> 00:54:55,640
Speaker 3: don't be creep.

1025
00:54:55,960 --> 00:54:58,120
Speaker 1: Just stop being creeps. It's so easy to not be

1026
00:54:58,239 --> 00:54:59,760
Speaker 1: a creep. He did not be a creep.

1027
00:55:00,160 --> 00:55:04,319
Speaker 3: So easy. Nothing like and don't put all your phone go.

1028
00:55:04,480 --> 00:55:06,440
Speaker 3: I really love those feet.

1029
00:55:08,280 --> 00:55:10,399
Speaker 1: I don't say anything. Mind your own business forever. That's

1030
00:55:10,440 --> 00:55:11,360
Speaker 1: the secret to life.

1031
00:55:11,440 --> 00:55:15,719
Speaker 2: That is the secret to life. Hannah, thank you so

1032
00:55:15,840 --> 00:55:19,399
Speaker 2: much for being on Bananas. Tell us where we can

1033
00:55:19,400 --> 00:55:19,879
Speaker 2: find you.

1034
00:55:20,080 --> 00:55:22,719
Speaker 1: Do your plugs? Give it up it all.

1035
00:55:23,200 --> 00:55:27,760
Speaker 4: I would like to plug. I would like to plug

1036
00:55:27,760 --> 00:55:30,839
Speaker 4: a podcast that is not not even my own.

1037
00:55:30,920 --> 00:55:31,640
Speaker 1: But I love this.

1038
00:55:32,040 --> 00:55:35,080
Speaker 4: It's just a podcast that I love to be on

1039
00:55:35,160 --> 00:55:37,440
Speaker 4: and do and the two of you should absolutely do

1040
00:55:37,560 --> 00:55:40,120
Speaker 4: it because you have such a great time. It's such

1041
00:55:40,160 --> 00:55:45,120
Speaker 4: a creative, lovely experience. It's a podcast called Fight Island.

1042
00:55:46,200 --> 00:55:50,359
Speaker 4: It is run by Sam Wiles and Jordan Dall too,

1043
00:55:50,680 --> 00:55:55,560
Speaker 4: amazing comedians, and it's kind of like Dungeons and Dragons.

1044
00:55:56,719 --> 00:56:00,239
Speaker 4: It's kind of like you. Basically, they will choose a

1045
00:56:00,480 --> 00:56:03,759
Speaker 4: genre or an idea or you know, sort of a

1046
00:56:03,880 --> 00:56:07,160
Speaker 4: setting and then sort of create characters and have them

1047
00:56:07,160 --> 00:56:10,320
Speaker 4: fight each other. And it's really fun and it's really

1048
00:56:10,360 --> 00:56:15,080
Speaker 4: silly and just really great and it's like a great

1049
00:56:15,160 --> 00:56:17,040
Speaker 4: podcast and I love doing it and I've done it

1050
00:56:17,040 --> 00:56:19,440
Speaker 4: three times and check.

1051
00:56:19,239 --> 00:56:20,359
Speaker 1: It out right.

1052
00:56:20,480 --> 00:56:23,360
Speaker 3: I will thank you for somebody else. You are the

1053
00:56:23,480 --> 00:56:25,640
Speaker 3: not Turkey Killer of this podcast.

1054
00:56:26,960 --> 00:56:27,840
Speaker 1: You really are.

1055
00:56:27,880 --> 00:56:31,080
Speaker 2: And everyone go and watch Hacks season two when it

1056
00:56:31,160 --> 00:56:32,880
Speaker 2: comes out in the future.

1057
00:56:33,800 --> 00:56:35,399
Speaker 4: Yes, coming to a theater near you.

1058
00:56:37,480 --> 00:56:43,880
Speaker 2: Thank you everyone, but no, no, sir.

1059
00:56:50,880 --> 00:56:53,600
Speaker 1: This has been an exactly right production.

1060
00:56:53,360 --> 00:56:55,720
Speaker 2: Produced and engineered by Katie Levine.

1061
00:56:55,520 --> 00:56:58,239
Speaker 1: Theme music by Kahan, and all of our artwork is

1062
00:56:58,280 --> 00:56:59,400
Speaker 1: done by Travis Millard.

1063
00:56:59,640 --> 00:57:02,320
Speaker 3: You can follow us on Instagram at the Bananas Podcast,

1064
00:57:02,360 --> 00:57:04,560
Speaker 3: where we post stories every day and things that we

1065
00:57:04,600 --> 00:57:06,040
Speaker 3: don't cover on the podcast.

1066
00:57:06,440 --> 00:57:10,080
Speaker 2: Listen, subscribe, and please leave us a review on Apple podcast, Stitcher,

1067
00:57:10,200 --> 00:57:11,640
Speaker 2: or wherever you get your podcast.

1068
00:57:11,960 --> 00:57:15,040
Speaker 3: And if you're interested in advertising on Bananas, please email

1069
00:57:15,120 --> 00:57:18,000
Speaker 3: us at the Bananas podcast at gmail dot com. That's

1070
00:57:18,160 --> 00:57:36,160
Speaker 3: the Bananas Podcast at gmail dot com.