Speaker 1: You're listening to Jojosa Now with me, Jojo Siua and
Speaker 1: iHeartRadio Podcast. All right, welcome back to Jojo. See what now,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna start crying. Oh my god. We are about
Speaker 1: too deep dive into a scary, scary, scary topic, very
Speaker 1: scary topic. But it's gonna be light. It's gonna be light,
Speaker 1: it's gonna be fluffy, it's gonna be fun, it's gonna
Speaker 1: be energetic. We talking about the history of my love life.
Speaker 1: Oh dear god, Oh my god. All right, Ah well,
Speaker 1: let me just say my love life has been a
Speaker 1: very very public affair. I've been very public about a
Speaker 1: lot of parts of my love life, for sure. There
Speaker 1: recently has been more that I've kept very private. I
Speaker 1: will say that I've learned a lot lot of lessons
Speaker 1: and we're gonna deep dive on that. Stay tuned. But
Speaker 1: I wanted to just kind of go like back in time,
Speaker 1: because there's as much as the world knows or things
Speaker 1: they know, there's a lot that the world does not
Speaker 1: know at all. And we are going back to POV.
Speaker 1: I'm going with two thousand and let's say twenty eleven.
Speaker 1: I was a really cute eight years old. Are you
Speaker 1: ready for this? Well, okay, actually, let's go even back
Speaker 1: in time a little bit further. I when I was
Speaker 1: very young. Everybody has their like cutey little crushes, right,
Speaker 1: I did have a crush on my neighbor. His name,
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I think his name was Carter. I
Speaker 1: don't know. I was literally like three or four. I
Speaker 1: was very very young, had a little crush on him. Anyways,
Speaker 1: cut to third grade, and I don't know if you
Speaker 1: guys know this or not, but I'm actually a married woman.
Speaker 1: When I was in third grade, I got proposed to
Speaker 1: at Recess. I went for the last semester of third grade.
Speaker 1: That's why I realized I was right there. However, for
Speaker 1: the last semester of third grade, just to make sure
Speaker 1: I didn't want to go to school, make sure I
Speaker 1: didn't want that to be my life, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean. And it definitely was not the life for me.
Speaker 1: I was on track with schooling. That was another reason.
Speaker 1: We wanted to make sure that I was, like, you know,
Speaker 1: where I needed to be, and very much so. Was
Speaker 1: we're chilling Anyways, One day, the bad boy his name
Speaker 1: was Braxton, and he he was cutie like he was
Speaker 1: like a cutie little boy, but he was a bad boy.
Speaker 1: He got in trouble. He was sitting in time out
Speaker 1: at recess. Well, rumor had it he was gonna propose
Speaker 1: to me that day that he was sitting at timeout
Speaker 1: and I can, like, I can picture this so vividly.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, it's one of those memories I like,
Speaker 1: I genuinely don't have a photo of can't don't have
Speaker 1: a photo of him, but like, I can see him,
Speaker 1: if that makes sense. I can see the thing he
Speaker 1: gave me, I can see where I put it, I
Speaker 1: can see where it all happened. So I walk over
Speaker 1: to him and we're I mean, we're babies at this
Speaker 1: point time, we're eight years old. And I was like, hey,
Speaker 1: I heard you have something to tell me today and
Speaker 1: he was like yeah, and I was like what is it.
Speaker 1: He was like, will you marry me? And I was
Speaker 1: like yeah, we had never talked before this. Keep in mind,
Speaker 1: it was very much so just like rumor had it,
Speaker 1: he was gonna ask me out and ask me to
Speaker 1: marry him, apparently. And he gave me this like cutie
Speaker 1: little like glassy jak ring that comes on the top
Speaker 1: of a cupcake and yeah, I put it in my
Speaker 1: cubby in my laundry room at my house. We had
Speaker 1: like this big stack of cubbies that our shoes would
Speaker 1: go in, and I popped that ring in there, and
Speaker 1: rumor has it's still there to this day. So, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm engaged. I'm off the market now, apparently engaged with
Speaker 1: a man for God for twelve years now. Obviously I'm kidding.
Speaker 1: That story is a very true story, but are so
Speaker 1: I'm kidding about the whole engaged thing. Anyways, after that,
Speaker 1: I that is when I went on to Abby's alto
Speaker 1: and dance competition, and boy, oh boy, did I have
Speaker 1: a crush on Travis. Now, see, I don't. It's weird
Speaker 1: because obviously now I'm very very if you didn't know,
Speaker 1: very very gay, and I don't find I can appreciate
Speaker 1: men's attraction nowadays, but I don't find them. I'm not.
Speaker 1: I'm not. I'm not. I don't think I will ever
Speaker 1: fall for a man anymore. I consider myself a lesbian,
Speaker 1: and so I look back at my life and I think, like,
Speaker 1: how much of all of that, all the boy crushes,
Speaker 1: was real? How much of that was me being like, oh,
Speaker 1: I need to have a crush on a boy. How
Speaker 1: many girls in my life that were my friends did
Speaker 1: I actually, like actually have a crush on but like
Speaker 1: was like too scared to realize it or admit it,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Like, anyways, Bob, I do
Speaker 1: audc Abmay's also in dance Competition, my first TV show.
Speaker 1: They edited this out of the first episode, but it's
Speaker 1: so sad. It was my first date that I ever
Speaker 1: went on, and it was with Travis. We had a
Speaker 1: duo and they set us on this little date. We
Speaker 1: got to go into Crafty and pick out snacks. We
Speaker 1: got oranges and em and m's and we sat on
Speaker 1: the stairs and we ate them and we talked and
Speaker 1: we held hands. It was cute. It was really cute. Obviously,
Speaker 1: nothing ever came of that. The best part about it
Speaker 1: is Travis. Now we talk about this, We've talked about
Speaker 1: it a few times. Travis is very openly gay. I'm
Speaker 1: very openly gay. So we were like, that's why we
Speaker 1: were both okay with this because we both knew, which
Speaker 1: is great. It's amazing. It just works. If it works,
Speaker 1: it works, and if it doesn't, it doesn't. So then
Speaker 1: I come home from audc and all of a sudden,
Speaker 1: I get my first real official boyfriend. What's his name?
Speaker 1: I don't remember? How did I meet him on Instagram?
Speaker 1: What did my mom do make me break up with
Speaker 1: him in eight hours? Now? I thought I was breaking
Speaker 1: this man's heart and apparently I was, at nine years old,
Speaker 1: don't know what this kid was really. Never talked to him,
Speaker 1: talked for about a day, and he was like, want
Speaker 1: to be my girlfriend? And I was like, frick ye
Speaker 1: I do, and yeah. We dated for eight hours and
Speaker 1: then that was it. Mom made me in things which
Speaker 1: honestly valid. I would make my kid, Freddy to do
Speaker 1: the same. Freddie is not my kid yet, Freddie will
Speaker 1: be my kid one day. If I ever talked about kids, Freddie,
Speaker 1: Eddie and Teddy, Freddy's my baby girl, and then Eddie
Speaker 1: and Teddy are the twin boys. Those are my babies
Speaker 1: one day. Anyways, then I am definitely off the dating
Speaker 1: scene for a very long time. Then I don't want
Speaker 1: anything to do with crushes. Think they're silly, think they're
Speaker 1: waste of time. Then I turned twelve, and that's when
Speaker 1: I was on Dance Moms, and so it was very
Speaker 1: When we were on Dance Moms, there was a lot
Speaker 1: of us girls, and it was very much like who
Speaker 1: do you have a crush on? Who do you have
Speaker 1: a crush on? Who do you have a crush on?
Speaker 1: And stuff. For me, I was like, well, damn, I
Speaker 1: need to have a crush. Let's go h Thomas. And
Speaker 1: I'm John talking very openly about this because it is
Speaker 1: all public out there. If you scroll back on my
Speaker 1: life far enough, you would find all of this information.
Speaker 1: But no one's gonna take time to scroll three years.
Speaker 1: So I'm just gonna give it to you all now
Speaker 1: in a thirty minute podcast. Had a crush on a
Speaker 1: kid named Thomas. He was on Nickelodeon. He was very
Speaker 1: very cuteie boy. He was awesome, super nice kid. We
Speaker 1: became really good friends. All I wanted was for this
Speaker 1: boy to kiss me on my thirteenth birthday. Did it
Speaker 1: happen spoiler alert No, but didn't. We text and where
Speaker 1: were so cute? We were so cute? Oh my god,
Speaker 1: looking back, it was so cute. It was very thirsty.
Speaker 1: I was very desperate. I gave very much so pick
Speaker 1: me girl, which is fine, but it just obviously is
Speaker 1: not the vibe now. Anyways, I used to be like, oh,
Speaker 1: I want to play a game. The yeah, let's play game.
Speaker 1: And I'd be like, let's play two truths and a
Speaker 1: lie and he'd be like, okay, this is all over text.
Speaker 1: How this man ever tolerated me or was friends with me,
Speaker 1: I don't know, Thomas. I'm so sorry for this. Anyways,
Speaker 1: I was like, I love to sing and dance. I
Speaker 1: have a massive crush on you. I own thirty seven cats,
Speaker 1: which one is a lie? Like I and I would
Speaker 1: do that so often, like then he would do his,
Speaker 1: and his would be like, I'm from Argentina. My name
Speaker 1: is Thomas. I'm on Nickelodeon, like it was so like chill.
Speaker 1: Then I'd be like from Argentina's for sure the lie.
Speaker 1: Then I would be like you would think like I
Speaker 1: would get the hint, like yo real back in. Then
Speaker 1: I would be like, I really really miss you. I
Speaker 1: think you're cute. I'm forty seven years old, like just
Speaker 1: so stupid, Jojo so stupid. Obviously had no game or
Speaker 1: did I have the best game. I mean, Joe Relman
Speaker 1: was kind of doing her big one. I'm not gonna
Speaker 1: lie anyways, Thomas crushed that fizzled out. Then I moved
Speaker 1: on to Robert Irwin had a massive crush on Robert Irwin.
Speaker 1: Was obsessed with the man. Thought we were for sure
Speaker 1: gonna get married, Like was was convinced we were gonna
Speaker 1: get married. And then cut to I actually, for real,
Speaker 1: for the first time ever, had a little bit of
Speaker 1: a fling with a person, and this was my first.
Speaker 1: The first two flings were with boys, and I had
Speaker 1: one real boyfriend. And then that's when I kind of realized, like, hey, wait,
Speaker 1: I was seventeen, We're got okay, No, I need I
Speaker 1: need to stick in order. I'm almost saying, I'm trying
Speaker 1: to jump to the good part. I'm trying to switch
Speaker 1: to girls, guys. I'm trying to get past this whole
Speaker 1: boy part of my life. But it genuinely was the
Speaker 1: first seventeen years of my life. So there's there's a lot,
Speaker 1: there's a thick of it that we got to get through. Anyways,
Speaker 1: had a cutie little boyfling that was fun, fresh fears.
Speaker 1: Got my first kiss when I was sixteen. It was cute.
Speaker 1: I'll give it to us, like whatever we were like,
Speaker 1: we were a cutie little like vibe and then cut
Speaker 1: to oh god, cut to later that same year, Yeah,
Speaker 1: This is in twenty twenty, twenty twenty. This is like
Speaker 1: POV September. I'm like, all right, Internet's boring right now?
Speaker 1: What can I do? How can I shake it up?
Speaker 1: And I was like, you know what, I want to
Speaker 1: make the internet think I have a boyfriend. This is
Speaker 1: at a point in TI where I was very hated
Speaker 1: on the internet, and I was like, oh, they'll eat
Speaker 1: this up. So I was like, all right, someone asked
Speaker 1: me to prom and I was like, sorry, I could go,
Speaker 1: but like, my boyfriend probably wouldn't like that very much.
Speaker 1: Did exactly what I thought I was gonna do with
Speaker 1: the world. Went into a store. Oh my god, who's
Speaker 1: Jojesi his boyfriend? YadA YadA, YadA, YadA YadA. So then
Speaker 1: I went with it for a bit and then my
Speaker 1: friends Kyler and Madison. Madison has a younger brother and
Speaker 1: his name is Mark, and they were like, hey, they
Speaker 1: knew what I was doing. They knew like the likes
Speaker 1: like that it wasn't real because they were very close
Speaker 1: to me, and they were like, we want to set
Speaker 1: you up with Madison with her little brother Mark, And
Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, yes, please do it.
Speaker 1: And so then Mark and I met, and they didn't
Speaker 1: tell Mark, like the whole thing that was going on
Speaker 1: on the internet with me having this like fake boyfriend.
Speaker 1: So then Mark saw that and was like what is this?
Speaker 1: And I was like, oh god, let me explain myself.
Speaker 1: So then I had to explain myself and he was
Speaker 1: like of course naturally he was like I do not
Speaker 1: believe you. And I was like okay, like I promised,
Speaker 1: and I was like, talk to your family, like they
Speaker 1: know what's going on right now. So then he did,
Speaker 1: and then obviously he became my boyfriend. And he became
Speaker 1: my boyfriend very fast. It was National Girlfriend Day and
Speaker 1: or maybe it was National Boyfriend Day. I don't know,
Speaker 1: it was one of the two. And he was like, oh, man,
Speaker 1: I wish I wish I could actually celebrate today. And
Speaker 1: I was like, well why can't you? And he was like,
Speaker 1: cause you know my girlfriend officially And I was like, well,
Speaker 1: why can't I be? And he was like do you
Speaker 1: want to be? And I was like yeah, And it
Speaker 1: was cute. We were driving home from the sugar factory
Speaker 1: and we were on a little date and he was
Speaker 1: driving my car and then yeah became his girlfriend. He
Speaker 1: became my boyfriend. It was cute. That was a fun
Speaker 1: little relationship. No, nothing bad, just young me, very very
Speaker 1: very gay, And yeah, I ended things. I've actually I've
Speaker 1: only ever been in the position where I'm the one
Speaker 1: to end things. I've never I've never been broken up with,
Speaker 1: which is interesting because so obviously all of those relationships
Speaker 1: are like CUTEI fun, Like half of them are all jokes.
Speaker 1: And then you know, of course Mark, and the one
Speaker 1: before Mark was very like, it was cute. And also
Speaker 1: I'm only saying the one before Mark because it wasn't
Speaker 1: ever very public, and I don't know if he would
Speaker 1: want it to be public, so I'm being I'm being cautious,
Speaker 1: I'm being respectful, although I'm sure he would be fine
Speaker 1: with it being public. We're good friends now today, been
Speaker 1: in my life for He's literally been in my life
Speaker 1: since I was like five, maybe we even known each
Speaker 1: other and like just saw him a few months ago,
Speaker 1: like we're chill anyways. But those were all just like cute, fun, frivolous.
Speaker 1: And then when I realized I was gay was right
Speaker 1: after I had broken up with Mark, and I had
Speaker 1: a friend who was gay, and I knew she was gay.
Speaker 1: She had come out to me that year. I kind
Speaker 1: of had my thoughts beforehand, but then she officially came
Speaker 1: out to me that year and thought it was cool,
Speaker 1: and my parents asked me. They were like, what would
Speaker 1: you do if she ever tried to make a move
Speaker 1: on you? And I was like ooh, and I was like,
Speaker 1: she would never she's my best friend, Like that'd be weird.
Speaker 1: And but I was like, wait, I would enjoy like
Speaker 1: I would. I would be okay with that. I would
Speaker 1: like that. And that's kind of when I knew, like
Speaker 1: for real, like, oh, this is real, like you don't
Speaker 1: like boys. And that was kind of my first realization.
Speaker 1: And then when I saw her in person again because
Speaker 1: we hadn't seen each other for a year. But then
Speaker 1: when I saw her in person again, I was like, oh, oh, oh,
Speaker 1: I don't like you, like a friend. But of course,
Speaker 1: you know, in my head, I thought there's no way
Speaker 1: she would ever like me. YadA, YadA, YadA. A few
Speaker 1: days later, find out she likes me. It was great.
Speaker 1: We had a good time. She ended up becoming my
Speaker 1: first girlfriend. I definitely was in some sort of version
Speaker 1: of love, not the you're the one love, but for
Speaker 1: sure some version of love. And it's interesting to look
Speaker 1: back on because I know in the moment when I
Speaker 1: was in my first serious relationship that I definitely was
Speaker 1: convinced that I like that, that was it, Like that
Speaker 1: she was the one for me. We were getting married,
Speaker 1: she was gonna be the mother with my children. Like
Speaker 1: that was definitely a very prominent thought in my head.
Speaker 1: But now you know, that was three years ago. I'm
Speaker 1: looking back at it, and I so it was at
Speaker 1: the very end of twenty twenty, very beginning of twenty
Speaker 1: twenty one, so a little bit over three years ago.
Speaker 1: Looking back at it, I'm like, that was definitely some
Speaker 1: sort of version of love, but it was not the
Speaker 1: version of love now that I can see that I
Speaker 1: would have one day, if that makes sense. Now, we
Speaker 1: had a great relationship. We had great times. We had
Speaker 1: good times. Of course, every relationship has a hard times,
Speaker 1: like that's no secret, but very fun learned a lot,
Speaker 1: had a good time. Very first serious relationship lasted nine
Speaker 1: months and then I ended things. And so I'm gonna
Speaker 1: talk about ending things. Being the one that's always had
Speaker 1: to end them is interesting. It's a tough perspective because
Speaker 1: you are are very obviously something has happened or something
Speaker 1: is happening that you don't want to be in the
Speaker 1: relationship anymore. But then at some point you kind of
Speaker 1: get convinced, like I'm gonna hurt this person if I leave,
Speaker 1: so I need to stay. Then you're hurting yourself, But
Speaker 1: then are you doing any good for them? But it's
Speaker 1: this person that you care so much about you don't
Speaker 1: want to hurt them. But then it's it's just like
Speaker 1: this such just back and forth dynamic, and it gets
Speaker 1: it gets really tough, and so you're you're double hurting
Speaker 1: yourself while you're hurting somebody else Whereas I think being
Speaker 1: the person being broken up with, I feel like if
Speaker 1: someone broke up with me, I would be very hurt,
Speaker 1: but I would know that they were making the right
Speaker 1: choice for them, you know what I mean, versus like
Speaker 1: being the person that has to do it. Like that's like,
Speaker 1: I don't know. I've always found it very, very very
Speaker 1: hard going through breakups for me is something that I
Speaker 1: take very seriously. It's why I'm very cautious to get
Speaker 1: into another relationship because I I'm scared of breakups. I
Speaker 1: think after you go through your first like heartbreak or
Speaker 1: version of a heartbreak, it scares you for sure, and
Speaker 1: I think that's kind of where I'm at in life,
Speaker 1: where I'm like, Okay, wait, do I want to do
Speaker 1: that to myself again? And I of course I do.
Speaker 1: But I now have some very very serious criteria and
Speaker 1: I've learned boundaries and I've learned structure, and it's been hard.
Speaker 1: I took all of twenty twenty three and I was like, no, dating,
Speaker 1: grow up, Jojo, find yourself, find your life, find your habits,
Speaker 1: find out to love properly. Get rid of your toxicity.
Speaker 1: Because I look, I won't lie. I'm for sure been
Speaker 1: toxic before, as we all have. Like anybody who thinks
Speaker 1: they haven't been toxic before, you lie in dear self.
Speaker 1: We've all been seventeen and eighteen and nineteen, and I'm
Speaker 1: currently twenty. I'm not much older, and I look back
Speaker 1: and I'm like, no, I definitely there's mistakes that I made. There's,
Speaker 1: of course, mistakes that have just happened, but there's there's
Speaker 1: a lot that I've learned in the last year that
Speaker 1: I'm like, now I'm excited to apply to a new relationship, honestly,
Speaker 1: and some people are going to think that I sound
Speaker 1: crazy right now, and that is okay. One of the
Speaker 1: biggest things for me right now that I'm looking for
Speaker 1: a relationship is somebody who is ready for kids. I
Speaker 1: am not ready, but I am very near ready, and
Speaker 1: I think that within the next three save three four.
Speaker 1: I wish I could say two three, but I still
Speaker 1: feel like I will be a little young in two years.
Speaker 1: But I say three four because I feel like that's
Speaker 1: like pregnant in three babies and four you know what
Speaker 1: I mean. And that is something that I care very
Speaker 1: very much about. I have wanted kids for a very
Speaker 1: long time. I of course went away. I make the
Speaker 1: joke to my family all the time. I'm like, thank
Speaker 1: God I'm not straight, because if I was, and if
Speaker 1: it was, that was the process of me getting pregnant,
Speaker 1: that would be like we would have a four year
Speaker 1: old by now. I'm kidding. I'm kidding, I'm kidding. I've
Speaker 1: just had a very I've had a very big maternal
Speaker 1: instinct since I was literally twelve. But of course, you know,
Speaker 1: me liking women, there is a very different process. All
Speaker 1: processes of getting pregnant are difficult and tough and confusing,
Speaker 1: but you know, as as a data bean where there's
Speaker 1: a little bit of extra steps. So that is something
Speaker 1: now that I'm really looking for in somebody who's like
Speaker 1: ready to be there in three years, which I think
Speaker 1: is why now I gravitate towards people that are older
Speaker 1: than me. I gravitate towards like twenty seven, twenty eight
Speaker 1: age because I feel like that's when more people are
Speaker 1: ready to have little babies. And then one day Freddy,
Speaker 1: Eddie and Eddy will be into the world and then
Speaker 1: everybody will get to see my fantasy that I've always
Speaker 1: wanted to live with my children. I can't wait. My
Speaker 1: friend the other day was like, what are you gonna do,
Speaker 1: like when you want to come to the studio, Like,
Speaker 1: how are you gonna do that with kids? And I
Speaker 1: was like, oh, I, Well, they'll be here with us.
Speaker 1: They will be having the time of their life with
Speaker 1: us for sure. Oh man, Okay. I feel like I
Speaker 1: want to just like crack down on some like fun
Speaker 1: random dating questions, love life history questions, and just like
Speaker 1: go freaking in for some fun. One of the first
Speaker 1: questions is have you been on dating apps? That actually
Speaker 1: is one of the worst parts, literally worst parts about
Speaker 1: being a celebrity is you cannot go on dating apps.
Speaker 1: It sucks. There is a dating app for celebrities called Reya,
Speaker 1: but there's not a lot of people on it, and
Speaker 1: you have to get approved. It's a whole thing. You
Speaker 1: have to get recommended. It's a whole thing. But the
Speaker 1: problem is Tinder bumble hinge. You can make an account,
Speaker 1: can submit my driver's license, put in my password number. God,
Speaker 1: I could give them my social Security number, but there's
Speaker 1: something that still registers Jojo Siua. Even if I put
Speaker 1: Joelle Siwa, that will flag the account and get it
Speaker 1: taken down. And so I verified them all all taken down.
Speaker 1: And it is brutal because I would have so much
Speaker 1: fun on a dating app. But honestly, I think it's good.
Speaker 1: I think it keeps me very very sane, and that's
Speaker 1: a good thing. Another question, what role do your friends
Speaker 1: and family play in your romantic relationships? This is something
Speaker 1: that I have had to learn the very very very
Speaker 1: hard way. In the beginning, I told everyone everything. I
Speaker 1: told everyone, the good, I told everyone, the bad, everyone
Speaker 1: the happy, I told everyone the sad. Meeting close friends,
Speaker 1: close family, And that is something that I realized. When
Speaker 1: you care about somebody, if so say I'm telling my
Speaker 1: mom the bad, write what's going on that's making me
Speaker 1: sad in my relationship, which is a very normal, natural thing. Uh,
Speaker 1: she is only going to remember that, She's not gonna
Speaker 1: remember the good stuff, and then it kind of made
Speaker 1: her and everybody around me. I'm just using her as
Speaker 1: a specific example. Resent the person that I was with,
Speaker 1: Resent my partner. And it's happened different times, multiple times.
Speaker 1: And it's hard because I can't get mad at her
Speaker 1: for caring about me, but also at the same time,
Speaker 1: it's my fault for sharing too much of the bad.
Speaker 1: But I also needed the help with the bad, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. And here's the lesson that I learned,
Speaker 1: and I swear on my life. I just learned this
Speaker 1: lesson yesterday my very best friends Kelsey. She is actually
Speaker 1: my tap teacher. She said, she says, it depends on
Speaker 1: what you're fighting about in your relationship. Are you fighting
Speaker 1: about big stuff or are you fighting about small stupid stuff?
Speaker 1: And I thought to myself, I said, oh, yeah, we
Speaker 1: only fight about small stuff. That's good. We don't fight
Speaker 1: about big things like that would be good. Like that,
Speaker 1: I was thinking about my past relationships and I was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: we don't fight about anything big. We only fight about
Speaker 1: like little stupid stuff. And as I was thinking that
Speaker 1: to myself, she said, because if you are, you want
Speaker 1: to be fighting about the big stuff that matters. And
Speaker 1: I was like, wait, wait, what do you mean? And
Speaker 1: she was like, well, if you're fighting over stupid, little
Speaker 1: everyday things, that's not okay. That's creating a tox environment.
Speaker 1: Now if you're fighting over like where not fighting over,
Speaker 1: but getting in pickles about like where you want to live,
Speaker 1: what you're freaking wedding financials or your your baby timeline,
Speaker 1: Like there's there are big things, how you're gonna be
Speaker 1: your house payment, who's paying the house? Like, there's a
Speaker 1: lot that goes into it. That are big fights, not fights,
Speaker 1: but talks I guess a better word. And of course
Speaker 1: some of them lead to fights, but big talks. And
Speaker 1: it's interesting because I was like the example that I used,
Speaker 1: there was a water bottle on the table, and I said, wow,
Speaker 1: that's crazy because like me and my ex we would
Speaker 1: argue over if that water had too much or too
Speaker 1: little water in it to flip and do the water
Speaker 1: bottle flip challenge. And Kelsey was like, that's not something
Speaker 1: you should fight over. And I was like, that blew
Speaker 1: my mind. And so I think that that's what my
Speaker 1: family could see and my partners is I we were
Speaker 1: fighting over small things and they didn't know that that's
Speaker 1: what was frustrating them. But I was telling them bad
Speaker 1: stories about small things that we would fight over and
Speaker 1: they would be like, Jojo, that's just unnecessary. You don't
Speaker 1: need it. And now now it all makes sense. Literally
Speaker 1: yesterday I learned that lesson. So I was like, that's interesting.
Speaker 1: That's an interesting thing for me to pick up on.
Speaker 1: What what are these arguments about. Are they about important
Speaker 1: things or are they about small stupid things. They should
Speaker 1: be about important things, never those small stupid things. Now,
Speaker 1: I will say love can be very fun, whether it
Speaker 1: is true love or it is just like cute love,
Speaker 1: it can be very fun. And there can be a
Speaker 1: lot of good with the bad, and it's it's hard
Speaker 1: because you want to enjoy that good so much, but
Speaker 1: you also can't let that bad affect you so much.
Speaker 1: And so that's kind of where I've learned to just
Speaker 1: like take it for what it is. When someone shows
Speaker 1: you their true colors, believe them, whether that be good
Speaker 1: or bad. But just just always have your head pretty
Speaker 1: clear as clear as possible. Another question, do you feel
Speaker 1: like you're the chaser or do you like to be chased?
Speaker 1: Oh see, this is so hard for me. I am
Speaker 1: definitely I love the chase. I do love the chase.
Speaker 1: But I hate games. So that's the problem. I don't
Speaker 1: like playing games. I don't like if someone plays games
Speaker 1: with me like that immediately turns me away from somebody.
Speaker 1: But I love the like I want, but I can't have.
Speaker 1: I love it, but I hate the game of it.
Speaker 1: So it's two. I also, even if I wanted to
Speaker 1: be chased, I physically can't let it happen. Like I
Speaker 1: don't know what it is. If I get a text,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna respond to it. If I see you your calling,
Speaker 1: I'm going to answer it. If you waited three hours
Speaker 1: to respond to me, I'm not gonna wait six I'm
Speaker 1: gonna wait three minutes, like I'm I'm I can't help bet.
Speaker 1: It's it's bad. How do you find ways to be
Speaker 1: your individual self? Honestly, that's something that I will admit
Speaker 1: is a very big flaw in me and relationships in
Speaker 1: the past. I never I never did, and I think
Speaker 1: that was a combined effort between me and past partners,
Speaker 1: for sure. But that is something that I really try
Speaker 1: to figure out in twenty twenty three by being alone,
Speaker 1: being looking at my friends, looking at my friends relationships,
Speaker 1: seeing how they live, seeing how the ones their traits
Speaker 1: that I like, their traits that they don't like, the
Speaker 1: traits that I want in a relationship that they have,
Speaker 1: the trades that I don't want. And well, my very
Speaker 1: good friends Rachel and Abby, there there's a lot of
Speaker 1: independence in their relationship. And I really really love that
Speaker 1: I have these other friends who work on cruise ships
Speaker 1: and they have massive sense of individuality as well. And
Speaker 1: I think that I've learned that that is so important
Speaker 1: that I have some friends as well who are very
Speaker 1: attached at the hip. I actually I have straight friends
Speaker 1: as well who are individual and I have straight friends
Speaker 1: as well who are attached at the hip. And I
Speaker 1: see now what I want to be like, and I
Speaker 1: see who I want to be like, and I see
Speaker 1: what couples I enjoy hanging around as their friend, and
Speaker 1: I want to create that space for my friends as well.
Speaker 1: And it's tough, but you gotta do what you gotta do. Man,
Speaker 1: All right, last freaking question, are you ready? It's massive?
Speaker 1: Do you want to get married one day? You're never
Speaker 1: gonna believe this. I know I sound crazy, but you
Speaker 1: just got to get on board. When I talk about Freddy,
Speaker 1: Eddie and Teddy, I'm very serious. People think in the
Speaker 1: beginning I'm joking about it, and they think a long time,
Speaker 1: especially because their names are hysterical Freddy, Eddie and Teddy. Also,
Speaker 1: if anyone has any middle name, suggestions, poor Freddie, she
Speaker 1: needs a middle name yet. Eddie and Teddy they have
Speaker 1: their middle names. You've got Eddie, Anthony, Teddy Tyler. But
Speaker 1: Freddie doesn't have a middle name yet. But I both
Speaker 1: both Eddie and Teddy their middle names are named after somebody,
Speaker 1: and so I want Freddie to also be named after somebody.
Speaker 1: But I can't. I can't come up with like what
Speaker 1: rings like Eddie, Anthony Rings, Teddy Tyler, Teddy ty Like
Speaker 1: that is the cutest little name ever, Teddy Tyler rings.
Speaker 1: I was like, Freddie needs like a like what's going
Speaker 1: to click? So if you have any suggestions, let me know.
Speaker 1: But back to what I was saying is I am
Speaker 1: very serious about it, and I really really want babies
Speaker 1: and I think that if somebody partner wise comes into
Speaker 1: my life and is very serious and very good within
Speaker 1: these next few years, one million percent I would want
Speaker 1: to get married. However, I am dead set on the
Speaker 1: on little baby Freddie coming here in three or four years,
Speaker 1: and so if no one's in my life at that
Speaker 1: point in time, kids will be my priority before a
Speaker 1: serious relationship and before marriage. And so I think it
Speaker 1: is just like a look into the future, what's gonna happen.
Speaker 1: I'm not opposed to being married, but at the same time,
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, I just don't want vibe is. But
Speaker 1: I look at Chrishelle and g Flip and I want
Speaker 1: what they have so bad. I like their relationship. To me,
Speaker 1: I'm just like you two are literally freaking perfect, like
Speaker 1: obsessed with them both, and they're both just amazing people.
Speaker 1: And so I'm like this, seeing them married makes me like, oh,
Speaker 1: that looks nice. That looks nice. But then you know,
Speaker 1: no one's around in the next three or four years.
Speaker 1: They're gonna they're gonna be marrying me with a baby,
Speaker 1: So it's it's all up for grabs. Man. Oh boy,
Speaker 1: this was only the start of the deep dive of
Speaker 1: my love life. We have a lot to go in
Speaker 1: hard lessons that I've learned, hard things that I've gone through,
Speaker 1: situations that I've never talked about, Situations that I've never
Speaker 1: been public about, things that I have been public about
Speaker 1: that I regret, things that I regret doing, saying, being
Speaker 1: and I will say there's a lot. There's a lot
Speaker 1: that I've learned by making mistakes publicly, and uh, that's
Speaker 1: gonna be a fun deep dive and that is going
Speaker 1: to I think be a very a good learning curve
Speaker 1: and a very good rant session for me, because that's
Speaker 1: what I feel like. This podcast is my personal rant session.
Speaker 1: But it's gonna be a goodrand session for me because
Speaker 1: I've learned a lot of lessons. I've learned that I
Speaker 1: want to keep my love life, believe it or not,
Speaker 1: private from here on out about my life, but what's
Speaker 1: out there's already out there, and so there's no shame
Speaker 1: in talking about it now because it is already out there.
Speaker 1: And I think the only thing that I can do
Speaker 1: is make things more clear, more be more aware of
Speaker 1: what they are, what they were. Uh yeah, that's gonna
Speaker 1: be the game plan. So get freaking ready because that
Speaker 1: that podcast Deep Dive is going to be a whole
Speaker 1: other level good freaking look just on popcorn for that one.
Speaker 1: I love y'all. Thanks for listening to joges Now. I'll
Speaker 1: see you next time. Peace out. Thank you so much
Speaker 1: for listening, everybody. Be sure to follow us on Instagram
Speaker 1: and TikTok at jojes You Now podcast. Be sure to
Speaker 1: write us a review and maybe if you're feeling to
Speaker 1: leave us five stars. I'll see you next week.