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Speaker 1: Joways on it's stay or go, Kyle. Good morning, Kyle,

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Speaker 1: how you doing?

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Speaker 2: Good morning guys.

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Speaker 1: How are you join?

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Speaker 3: Okay man, let's hear it group therapy and state or go?

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Speaker 3: What's going on with you and your This is your girlfriend?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it is my girlfriend, Christa. We've been together for

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Speaker 2: about three years and I love her a lot, and.

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Speaker 4: I just I have some concerns because.

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Speaker 2: She's got kids and she's never introduced me to her kids.

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Speaker 4: I've asked about this.

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Speaker 1: In three years.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, We've never been introduced, you know.

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Speaker 4: So I've asked about this, and she always.

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Speaker 2: Has the same kind of excuse that it's, uh, you

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Speaker 2: know that she's not ready and you know, it's not

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Speaker 2: time yet. And I just I don't know what to

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Speaker 2: do because I was, like I said, three years and

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Speaker 2: I really do love her and I'd like to take

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Speaker 2: it to the next level, but I just don't know

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Speaker 2: if that's the right thing to do because I've never

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Speaker 2: met the kids, and I would kind.

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Speaker 4: Of like to have some sort of even if it's a.

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Speaker 2: Small relationship with them that they would be open for

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Speaker 2: me to, you know, enter their lives at this point.

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Speaker 1: Where do they live these kids? They live with her as.

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Speaker 2: Far as I know. I mean, she's lying if I

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Speaker 2: hope not.

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Speaker 3: But I like this, Kyle, Kyle. This woman doesn't want

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Speaker 3: to marry you. She don't want to marry you, because

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Speaker 3: how can you be with somebody for three years and

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Speaker 3: you're both in the same page about a future and

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Speaker 3: after three years you have not met her children. I mean,

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Speaker 3: I would imagine they're very important to her, they live

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Speaker 3: with her, and for three years, you guys have somehow

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Speaker 3: avoided that introduction. I mean, I don't I don't see

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Speaker 3: how she could possibly see a future. I'm starting to

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Speaker 3: be uh, you know, Debbie Downer over here. But like

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Speaker 3: I can see, after weeks or months or maybe even

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Speaker 3: a year, I could see being protective over your kids.

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Speaker 3: We hear, We've talked about it on the show before.

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Speaker 3: We hear it all the time. I'm not going to

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Speaker 3: introduce my children to just anybody. But three years is

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Speaker 3: a long time. People have been married and divorced in

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Speaker 3: three years.

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Speaker 4: Or last I understand that.

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Speaker 2: And you know, this is the first girl that I've

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Speaker 2: dated that's had any type of.

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Speaker 4: That's had kids. So I don't and I don't have

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Speaker 4: kids on my own.

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Speaker 2: So I don't know how I would feel or what

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Speaker 2: the you know, exact protocol is or you know how

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Speaker 2: long it takes. So I don't want to be pushy

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Speaker 2: or over you know, overstepping the boundaries. But like I said,

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Speaker 2: I'm kind of in this place where three years where it's.

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Speaker 1: Kind of a marriage.

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Speaker 3: Family because after three years, after three years, yeah, I mean,

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Speaker 3: if in fact you guys are both, if you're both

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Speaker 3: in the same page about a future, then I think

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Speaker 3: everything should be on the table after this period of time.

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Speaker 3: I mean, and I'm not saying you have to raise

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Speaker 3: these children or that you have to be involved day

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Speaker 3: to day, but they should know that you exist, and

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Speaker 3: you should have begun the process of immersion your life

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Speaker 3: with theirs, theirs with yours in some way if in

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Speaker 3: fact she intends to marry you. I don't think she

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Speaker 3: intends to marry you. I think you're a side piece

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Speaker 3: or something. Because I'm sorry, I don't mean to be mean.

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Speaker 3: I'm really not trying to be mean. There's not there's

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Speaker 3: something very wrong about this.

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Speaker 2: I know I and I hate I hate to have

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Speaker 2: the end it because I put up so much time

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Speaker 2: on this, But I do I think, do I give

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Speaker 2: them an ultimatum or something like say, hey, do I

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Speaker 2: meet your kids?

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Speaker 1: They're you know? Or let me me your kids and

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Speaker 1: your husband are round. I mean, have you met any

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Speaker 1: other family members?

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Speaker 3: No?

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Speaker 1: I haven't.

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Speaker 5: When I say this, you are a side piece, and

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Speaker 5: that's okay. You know, everybody has a role in life,

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Speaker 5: and for three years you have been her side piece.

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Speaker 1: I don't mean to meet them. Kids, just enjoyed it round.

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Speaker 1: I've seen pictures of these kids. These kids are real

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Speaker 1: like or is it like j C.

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Speaker 3: Penny pictures? Did she leaves the pictures in the frame

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Speaker 3: when she bought them at Target?

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Speaker 1: Took it home? Look at my kids? Well these kids

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Speaker 1: are black.

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Speaker 3: And your wife, well you ain't seen my babby dad,

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Speaker 3: I mean my baby daddy, Kyle. I gotta take some

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Speaker 3: phone calls on this man. And I'm sorry, like I

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Speaker 3: don't mean to. I don't mean to, you know, dash

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Speaker 3: your hopes here, but I mean you did call us,

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Speaker 3: and and well we're going to tell you and.

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Speaker 2: You guys are probably and you guys are probably right.

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Speaker 2: And I've been in kind of denial denial for a while.

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Speaker 2: I guess I just, you know, I want to make

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Speaker 2: sure I'm doing the right thing if.

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Speaker 1: We do in upending it that there wasn't something more there.

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Speaker 2: But it sounds like that, uh, this.

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Speaker 1: May not be for me. So when is an appropriate time?

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Speaker 1: Because I feel like, how do you put a timeline

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Speaker 1: on when someone should meet your three years? You know,

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Speaker 1: I'm just asking the question. I mean, some people move

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Speaker 1: slower than others. I guess I don't know.

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Speaker 3: I mean again, I could see months, I could see

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Speaker 3: a year, I could see you know. But if if

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Speaker 3: this is someone you're gonna be with for the rest

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Speaker 3: of your life, then I would think that you would

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Speaker 3: want to try and and you mesh those things together

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Speaker 3: as quickly as you possibly could and as quickly as

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Speaker 3: is reasonable. That is not as as you possibly could

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Speaker 3: as quickly as is as reasonable as everyone's comfortable with it.

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Speaker 3: After three years at the very least, I don't think

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Speaker 3: she thinks he's going anywhere, So either she's using him

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Speaker 3: for something or what. But if after three years as

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Speaker 3: a future here, then he needs to meet her children.

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Speaker 3: And again he doesn't need to be their father, but

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Speaker 3: he needs they need to know exist, They need to

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Speaker 3: be comfortable with him unless there's something to hide here.

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Speaker 1: Right, what does she do for a living. Is she

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Speaker 1: a doctor? Is in the entertainment industry? Kyle? Is she

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Speaker 1: a pilot?

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Speaker 2: No?

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Speaker 1: No, she's a good job.

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Speaker 2: She's got a good job. Well, I mean, I guess

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Speaker 2: as far as I know. I mean, if she's lying

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Speaker 2: about this or whatever.

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Speaker 1: I don't know.

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Speaker 3: Whatever her name is, that ain't her name name? She's

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Speaker 3: lying to you. You haven't met her other family?

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Speaker 1: Have you met? How many of her friends have you met?

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Speaker 2: I have met a couple of her friends.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I exist at least.

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Speaker 1: Okay, Kyle, let me take some phone calls on this man.

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Speaker 3: Good luck. I'm sorry. This is tough love. I don't

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Speaker 3: mean to I'm not trying to be rude here, but like,

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Speaker 3: this is not right. This, this does not pass the

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Speaker 3: smell test. And good luck.

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Speaker 1: All right. I appreciate it, guy, and I'll be listening.

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Speaker 1: Thank you.

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Speaker 3: Eight five five five five, Hey Jay, three years. This

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Speaker 3: guy has been with this woman and has not met

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Speaker 3: her kids or family.

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Speaker 6: Yeah.

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Speaker 5: I am a single mom. My children's father passed away.

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Speaker 5: I am their gay keyboard, and I am their protective

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Speaker 5: So some there are some guys they're ready.

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Speaker 6: Oh, let's go to the next level. I just need

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Speaker 6: to meet your kids, we meet the kids. If it

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Speaker 6: doesn't go well with us, now my children are heartbroken too.

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Speaker 6: Now my children are in pain too. Or maybe you

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Speaker 6: get along really well with the kids, but we have

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Speaker 6: a conflict, and I have conflict with my children because

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Speaker 6: of that.

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Speaker 5: To the next level.

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Speaker 6: Then go to the next level, okay.

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Speaker 5: And say here's a ring. I'm ready, but please understand

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Speaker 5: we need some more transficient times.

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Speaker 1: But because I need.

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Speaker 3: To meet the kids, Jay, three years is not the

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Speaker 3: next level. What is three years? That's a long time

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Speaker 3: to be with somebody to be playing around, and if

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Speaker 3: he's calling us, it does go I'm sorry.

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Speaker 5: It assumes that she's playing around and not playing gatekeeper

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Speaker 5: for her children. If he's ready for the next level,

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Speaker 5: he can say I'm ready for the next level.

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Speaker 6: I want to marry you.

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Speaker 5: Here's a ring, but I do need to be in

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Speaker 5: these kids life for a minute, and that's going to

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Speaker 5: delay that. So I would argue, after three years, why

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Speaker 5: is he playing?

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Speaker 3: What I would say to you, Jay, is I think

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Speaker 3: that he needs after three years if he wants to

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Speaker 3: marry her, he has every right to meet her kids

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Speaker 3: and her family and for them to know me exists

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Speaker 3: before he puts a ring to agree. And again, if

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Speaker 3: you think this has ever been discussed, then she could

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Speaker 3: just say put a ring on it that you can

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Speaker 3: meet my kids. I don't think that that's the problem.

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Speaker 3: I really don't think that's what's going on here.

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Speaker 5: I don't think as a as a woman, if you're

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Speaker 5: not ready to marry me, that's a you decision. I

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Speaker 5: would not say to meet my children, you have to

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Speaker 5: put a ring on it, because then that makes everything

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Speaker 5: all conditional about this, that and the other, and then

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Speaker 5: pushing you. That's not it.

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Speaker 1: She is not willing.

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Speaker 5: It could be exactly what you're saying, there's some secret whatever.

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Speaker 5: But as a woman, I promise you I dated for

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Speaker 5: a whole year and my children never knew I dated

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Speaker 5: because I did not want them attached. I did not

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Speaker 5: want them asking questions if it didn't work out. It

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Speaker 5: didn't work out, no hard feelings that my children are

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Speaker 5: not damaged.

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Speaker 3: You're exactly right, and I agree with everything you're saying.

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Speaker 3: But there's a huge difference between a year and three

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Speaker 3: and and so that's that's why I'm out with is

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Speaker 3: a long time. But Jay and the fact that he's

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Speaker 3: calling us, he's usually a last resort, which means this

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Speaker 3: has been discussed and it's like getting anywhere. And they're

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Speaker 3: on two separate peoples.

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Speaker 5: This should be a waiting by the phone.

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Speaker 1: Well, I think we ow to call her and.

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Speaker 5: Say this is how serious he thinks this is and

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Speaker 5: he just needs another context. See where that goes.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, thank you, have a good day, and thanks for calling.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, there's something is very much not right here.

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Speaker 3: And she said she implied to put a ring on

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Speaker 3: it and then I'll introduce you to my kids. She

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Speaker 3: basically said that did she know her are like crazy? No,

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Speaker 3: she did, but then she switched it up. You know,

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Speaker 3: things happened when you a city girl.

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Speaker 1: We got things. You know. We just want to our girl.

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Speaker 1: But I hear her though her feelings are valid. She's

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Speaker 1: protecting her kids. I get it. She absolutely protects your kids.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but you're still protecting your kids from a man

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Speaker 3: after three years and that's not the guy.

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Speaker 1: She's not sure about them, that's what it is. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: she's in their own time and.

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Speaker 7: That's okay, but she's not sure about them, and I

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Speaker 7: think that's I don't think she's married, nothing like that,

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Speaker 7: but I do think that she's still I don't know.

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Speaker 1: We would need to ask her that, you know, three years,

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Speaker 1: she's not sure about them, I think so, So okay,

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Speaker 1: I'm never going to say never.

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Speaker 7: But if I ever get divorced, like my whole thing is,

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Speaker 7: I'm not getting remarried, like I just I don't want to.

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Speaker 7: I'm exhausted, Like marriage is exhausting. It's beautiful, but it's tiring.

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Speaker 7: So well that sounds great, I can't wait. No, so

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Speaker 7: we're admiring it's beautiful, but I was by myself for

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Speaker 7: twenty nine years, so like it's just you know, I'm

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Speaker 7: used to my own way.

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Speaker 2: It's not just it.

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Speaker 7: And I love my partner because he puts up with me,

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Speaker 7: but no one else probably will. That's okay, I'm gonna

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Speaker 7: be to me and my daughter are gonna be great.

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Speaker 3: My point is, wow, I'm I'm glad you've planned out

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Speaker 3: this entire life without Okay, anyway, so yeah.

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Speaker 7: This is this is a what if scenario. But my

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Speaker 7: point is, like I know that I don't want to

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Speaker 7: introduce her, even if it's three years, because I probably

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Speaker 7: won't marry that person, you know what I mean?

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Speaker 1: Like that to me doesn't seem crazy.

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Speaker 3: But I but we're not. We're not taking into consideration

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Speaker 3: for one second. This man's needs, like we're all we're

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Speaker 3: seen to be worried about, is what's in it? What

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Speaker 3: is her comfort level? No, this man wants to be

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Speaker 3: married to her. He has a right to say, I

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Speaker 3: want to know everything about your life. I want you

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Speaker 3: to include me in all aspects of your life, including

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Speaker 3: that with your children, because I would assume they're important

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Speaker 3: to you, and you won't. So how is he supposed

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Speaker 3: to take her seriously? I very rarely advocate for the males,

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Speaker 3: but in this case, I'm like, if I don't think

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Speaker 3: she's convinced, I don't think. I don't think this is

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Speaker 3: the guy. I think she's wasting his time. I don't

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Speaker 3: think they're on the same page.

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Speaker 1: I think she'd find someone else. I'm sorry, Hey, Dandy,

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Speaker 1: good morning.

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Speaker 8: Hey, good morning guys.

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Speaker 5: Love you guys.

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Speaker 1: You want to say say or go?

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Speaker 8: Yeah, she needs to go. I am a single mom

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Speaker 8: and I am a total mama bear, So I get

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Speaker 8: it a year completely correct. But three years she is

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Speaker 8: not into him. She is probably using him for when

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Speaker 8: she wants her needs mess, and the poor guy is

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Speaker 8: wasted a lot of time on someone that has no

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Speaker 8: consideration for him.

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Speaker 1: This is very there's no way.

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Speaker 8: And on top of it, Kiki, he's never even met

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Speaker 8: anyone else from her side. Right, this is not going anywhere.

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Speaker 8: And you do not have someone put a ring on

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Speaker 8: your finger before they meet your children, because what if

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Speaker 8: your children hate them? You are not going to then

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Speaker 8: continue to marry them.

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Speaker 3: If you're if there's a major disconnect, like the kids

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Speaker 3: don't get the vote, but like what if there's a okay,

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Speaker 3: so you date a person for a period of time,

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Speaker 3: however long it is months, a year, a year and

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Speaker 3: a half, I don't know how long it is a while,

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Speaker 3: and then you determine, okay, this is the guy I

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Speaker 3: want to be with. Then you introduce the kids and

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Speaker 3: you're exactly right. What if there's a major disconnect. What

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Speaker 3: if the kids really don't like this guy, or he

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Speaker 3: doesn't like them, or they don't get along, or there's

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Speaker 3: just well, then you're not going to get married. So

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Speaker 3: then why is there Then there wouldn't even need to

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Speaker 3: be a ring. This is shaya not.

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Speaker 8: Come before leaving the kids? Yeah, it never does. And

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Speaker 8: what if he's no good with the kids, then I

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Speaker 8: wouldn't want to marry him, even if my kids liked him,

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Speaker 8: like if he Some people just aren't good with kids.

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Speaker 3: Okay, thanks, appreciate you people have about Yeah, no she was.

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Speaker 3: But here's the other thing, so you can protect the kids.

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Speaker 3: Let's say this whole thing is about protecting her children. Okay, fine,

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Speaker 3: you don't have to protect your sister, your brother, your family,

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Speaker 3: your friends. Why don't they Why are they not involved?

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Speaker 3: Because because she's hiding something. Yeah, where are you guys

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Speaker 3: be hanging out? If the kids live with her, where

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Speaker 3: where do you guys go?

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Speaker 1: Right? What Christmas together?

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Speaker 9: You know?

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Speaker 10: My New Year?

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Speaker 3: I know he's very uncomfortable with this. Hey monica, how

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Speaker 3: you doing?

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Speaker 1: They good?

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Speaker 2: Are either?

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Speaker 1: Hi? Great? Thank you? Stair Ago.

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Speaker 3: But by the way, just if you're just tuning in,

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Speaker 3: this dude's calling because he's been with a woman for

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Speaker 3: three years and she has yet to introduce him to

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Speaker 3: her children or her family.

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Speaker 1: This dude is toast right. Yeah no, that's where you

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Speaker 1: tell me what you think.

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Speaker 9: Well, so I'm sorry. So it took me a year

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Speaker 9: and a half when I started dating my boyfriend who

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Speaker 9: introduced him to my son. And the only reason I

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Speaker 9: did that was because I wanted to make sure that

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Speaker 9: it was going to go somewhere, and after a year,

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Speaker 9: you should already know where this is going and that

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Speaker 9: you know, your children should have some kind of relationship.

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Speaker 9: And again, if they don't agree or like you know,

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Speaker 9: they don't get along, then that's where you should know that.

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Speaker 9: You know, like you can't marry somebody who doesn't get

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Speaker 9: along with your kids, or you know, I wanted my

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Speaker 9: son to have a relationship with my boyfriends. Luckily for me,

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Speaker 9: it went really well and they have a great relationship.

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Speaker 3: Now, hey, Monica, you can do what Christan Cavalari did,

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Speaker 3: and that's introduced the kids right off the bat to

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Speaker 3: the twenty five year old guy that you're skilling and

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Speaker 3: before he heads down the hall to service mom like

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Speaker 3: it's and then break up with the guy. It's totally

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Speaker 3: normal to do it that way. Thank you, Monica. I

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Speaker 3: have a good day.

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Speaker 5: You do.

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Speaker 3: The kids like what happened to our what happened to

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Speaker 3: our video game buddy? You know, right, devastated, devastated? You know,

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Speaker 3: isn't that weird?

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Speaker 1: That's weird? Hey Rosa, I doing good morning, Hi, good morning, guys,

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Speaker 1: how are you doing very well? Thanks for listening, what

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Speaker 1: do you want to say?

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Speaker 11: Well, actually, I believe that it's it's been three years

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Speaker 11: and she has not introduced the kids. I would assume

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Speaker 11: somehow the kids and the baby daddy are.

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Speaker 5: Still, like you know, in somehow they're coming to.

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Speaker 11: Visit or the kids go to visit the father, and

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Speaker 11: I feel like there's a relationship still with the baby

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Speaker 11: daddy because she doesn't want them to spill the beans.

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Speaker 11: And also, if she's not interesting into the family, it

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Speaker 11: is because she doesn't want the family either to know,

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Speaker 11: so they don't tell the father that she's dating again.

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Speaker 11: That's the only reason I would think that she would

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Speaker 11: actually isolate the kids.

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Speaker 9: And her family at the same time.

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Speaker 11: So he's being played.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I agree, thank you, Rosa. I have a

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Speaker 1: good day. Okay, thank you.

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Speaker 10: If she's not married and she does have these kids

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Speaker 10: and she's gatekeeping the kids, like when she finally tells

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Speaker 10: these says, hey, guys, i've been dating this man for

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Speaker 10: three years. This man is gonna lose lose situation, Like

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Speaker 10: you've been hiding this man from your kids for three

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Speaker 10: years as well, Like he's never.

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Speaker 1: Gonna be like, oh you you're dating this man for

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Speaker 1: three years tell us getting played and the kids are

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Speaker 1: gonna rade him out. He's a fat piece.

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Speaker 3: The kids are gonna ride her out and be like, well,

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Speaker 3: I need another dad for I got I got main dad.

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Speaker 3: I got main dad. Every day you're talking about my

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Speaker 3: mom and dad will go up this morning together. But

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Speaker 3: what I need you for a minute sleep.

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Speaker 1: I'm trying.

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Speaker 3: I'm not laughing at this gay, but I'd be doing.

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Speaker 3: The entertainmer reported two minutes.

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Speaker 1: Friendship