Speaker 1: Carola, she's the queen of talking. He was sown your man.
Speaker 1: She's on the inside. She got the scoop on the
Speaker 1: laws to walk on the lines and side. No one
Speaker 1: can do with quiet, my Carol, Carola, No one can
Speaker 1: do with quiet Caroline. Okay, here we are this girlfriend
Speaker 1: confidential heart too, and I have two my favorite girlfriend's
Speaker 1: play Crowder and Christen Breast in the house was that
Speaker 1: were actually in the Crowder house, Were in the crowderhouse,
Speaker 1: Crowder Treehouse, the Crowder treehouse, because literally, you're in a forest,
Speaker 1: feels like it, except there's a house there in there,
Speaker 1: in there, and you can't see him. The bamboo hides it.
Speaker 1: But here's the problem. We don't know how to take
Speaker 1: care of bamboo, and so if it gets too tall,
Speaker 1: it'll block our view to indigenous, to our people to know.
Speaker 1: I haven't probably learned it yet, but I didn't think
Speaker 1: the other day, pressed that's good. Would you just say haphazardly,
Speaker 1: hap hazardly disheveled. Have quite a vocabulary, Lanny did not have.
Speaker 1: Has really whived together the most amazing lunch. It was
Speaker 1: pretty good. That happens about twice a year. I feel
Speaker 1: grateful and don't tell Corey that's why when you're in
Speaker 1: there wondering like how happy Michael beebe had this spread,
Speaker 1: I'm like, well, Corey never gets this. And I was like,
Speaker 1: man if math okay at home my day and I
Speaker 1: just had all this homecooked food just out for display.
Speaker 1: He'd be so happy. But don't you feel don't you
Speaker 1: feel like it's the reason you do it for girlfriends,
Speaker 1: because they wouldn't like pressing, wouldn't walk in and be like,
Speaker 1: this is a beautiful table of food. You'd be like
Speaker 1: this is awesome, like just you know, like that's why
Speaker 1: you do it for your girlfriend. Corey wouldn't have noticed
Speaker 1: the gathered sun did the we go take sure with
Speaker 1: He just totally nostalgic for me because my mom used
Speaker 1: to me, do you punch all the time? This takes
Speaker 1: me back to one of the child I'm so glad.
Speaker 1: So we've been really already precovering a lot of like
Speaker 1: pretty strong topics. Here were sold all the life strong.
Speaker 1: I will say, in all of the world, you're meant
Speaker 1: to safe this spots. I love that. I feel honestly,
Speaker 1: I feel like I could come and just does this
Speaker 1: sound awful? But Pato is a compliment. Just don't hold
Speaker 1: my feelings on y'all. Really, it's what I told you earlier.
Speaker 1: So I'm sorry for dumping all this on you, and
Speaker 1: I said, you're lifing on us. This is just like,
Speaker 1: this is what we do. We talk about the good,
Speaker 1: the bad, the ugly, sort it through, and then too
Speaker 1: much letter. We get together and sort it all through again,
Speaker 1: same stuff. Everybody's rotate the grab bag feeling because he's good.
Speaker 1: We said that, we said, I forgot who described it.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna take that back for god. My eyes twitching.
Speaker 1: Everyone had my eyes switching on time. So what was
Speaker 1: it like you and I have when we talked about something,
Speaker 1: We're like, oh, we're not going to stress about somewhere,
Speaker 1: we're gonna give it to God. Like the visual handing
Speaker 1: it over, which I actually was inspired probably am I
Speaker 1: visit because I feel like you're making a fast I
Speaker 1: feel like chrishing what I'm saying to the right track,
Speaker 1: going here, going, I'm not coming on you, Okay, I'm
Speaker 1: like yes, okay, I'm like reading a flash card. Yeah. Um,
Speaker 1: So Hayley Hubbard actually um inspired me to have this
Speaker 1: visual and and so I've tried to use it a
Speaker 1: few times when like most recently in my discussion with you,
Speaker 1: for me, it was just handing my marriage over to
Speaker 1: God and it's not but it's bad but present I
Speaker 1: kind of speed dated, you know, for everybody who's new.
Speaker 1: You guys know, y'all got together and then how many months? Person,
Speaker 1: we're coming up on four years and we've had we
Speaker 1: had two babies on our one baby in heaven, a
Speaker 1: new home, like I don't could be so mad. I mean,
Speaker 1: I don't know how many like top ten records or whatever,
Speaker 1: you know, a number one, Um, just a lot of
Speaker 1: life lived in four years. But that's what happens when
Speaker 1: you find your person he doesn't go for it. Um.
Speaker 1: But I was saying, there's no time to date, just
Speaker 1: real for us. So y'all are a reverse dating. So
Speaker 1: now you've got all kids, alternate life revers life. How
Speaker 1: is that? Because Lane and I did it opposite. We've
Speaker 1: we've been with our guys forever, Like Michael and I've
Speaker 1: been together for over ten years. You and Corey even
Speaker 1: in coming up. I know, it's crazy, how oldvergall when
Speaker 1: you got together sixteen and seventeen, you've been together. I
Speaker 1: told my age, I don't think I care. I think
Speaker 1: I'm blocked about my age yesterday. So I think we're okay. Yeah,
Speaker 1: a long time. But you think of then your babies
Speaker 1: when you're together, and then you become adults together, and
Speaker 1: then you do music industry together. It's like a lot
Speaker 1: of different lives and y'all navigated a lot because like
Speaker 1: when you and Corey first got together, it wasn't like
Speaker 1: he was just rolling in the success yet No, there
Speaker 1: was no rolling. There was no roll and we you know,
Speaker 1: I think your parents were I'm sure if I'm a
Speaker 1: parent of adult children one day, hopefully I would have
Speaker 1: the opportunity that I would tell my kids the same thing.
Speaker 1: Are you sure you need to get married at twenty
Speaker 1: two and twenty three? You think you haven't figured out?
Speaker 1: But you have no money? Or are you gonna do
Speaker 1: for health insurance? But you know, there were a lot
Speaker 1: of breath Yeah, I mean, I don't think my parents
Speaker 1: were terribly stoked about that. I won't go into the conversation,
Speaker 1: just like this is the best idea. Listen. There may
Speaker 1: have been an intervention right before my wedding today, is
Speaker 1: this really what you want to do? I remember the
Speaker 1: dinner conversation and it wasn't anything against Corey, It's just you.
Speaker 1: You know it's gonna be a hard road, yeah, because
Speaker 1: it's like there's no plan, and that's what all three
Speaker 1: of us have in common, Like we're all the musician families.
Speaker 1: Like there's no set plan on how this thing is
Speaker 1: gonna unfold. There is nothing today or life because even today, yeah, ridiculous,
Speaker 1: Like some people who want just to really safe, why
Speaker 1: you wanted all organized and like mapped up, don't go
Speaker 1: into the music and highly encouraged a lot of people
Speaker 1: not to marry. But it's so much fun. How in
Speaker 1: your twenty years being glory, how much have you a
Speaker 1: lot of the adventure and grow up with him? Like
Speaker 1: how much is that meant to you? I I think
Speaker 1: because I've been a part of it from almost day one,
Speaker 1: Like I feel invested in it. I feel he's done
Speaker 1: a phenomenal job of making me be a part of it. Um.
Speaker 1: You know, I would work full time job so that
Speaker 1: he could go out on the road and make negative money,
Speaker 1: and so he's done a good job of I mean
Speaker 1: when when we buy something, this is this is because
Speaker 1: of you. When he has number one song, this is
Speaker 1: because of you. So that part has been great. Um,
Speaker 1: and there's a square Crowder he's a great producer, songwriter,
Speaker 1: and Christens he's a Lowkash Preston of Lowkash by anyone
Speaker 1: who's listening doesn't know. But there's been, you know, plenty
Speaker 1: of days where it's like, what are we thinking here?
Speaker 1: You know the last week when I texted you, I mean,
Speaker 1: if we're just being really real, yeah, I mean I left.
Speaker 1: My husband left me with a crying baby. This is
Speaker 1: not his fault and I'm just laying the bus was
Speaker 1: leading in life roles on. And we have a two
Speaker 1: month old who was losing his mind and a two
Speaker 1: and a half year old who had hurt feelings because
Speaker 1: dad's leaving, and I'm only one person and he's looking
Speaker 1: at me like I don't know that I've ever seen him,
Speaker 1: like I want to stay more with me, you know,
Speaker 1: texted Lyney and I was like, um, friend, like he's
Speaker 1: got you know, Celeney called me, he's really giving me
Speaker 1: the business sell two month old. Oh my goodness, I
Speaker 1: remember I got that text and I was like, you
Speaker 1: know what, I'm just gonna text your back. Come over tomorrow.
Speaker 1: Let's talk through everything and whatever. Something was like you
Speaker 1: have to call her because it's like ten thirty. Actually,
Speaker 1: if it's night, we're not like calling that, Like yeah,
Speaker 1: but I picked up that phone caller and crying baby
Speaker 1: answers for like two solid minutes love or crying wow,
Speaker 1: but little rough party three is all crying right now,
Speaker 1: like everyone's trying. And so it broke my heart. And
Speaker 1: I sat on my bed and Corey was outside because
Speaker 1: he sits in the backports, you know, and not he
Speaker 1: loves it, and it was too cold for me. And
Speaker 1: I thought, Okay, I'm gonna go down there and tell
Speaker 1: him I will be back at seven am and tell
Speaker 1: him to like take care of our two babies. But
Speaker 1: I gotta go down there because legend, I've never heard
Speaker 1: him cry like that because his stomach was hurting. And
Speaker 1: then you were crying, and I mean and then I'm
Speaker 1: in here like about to cry, and I was just
Speaker 1: like it broke my heart, but we worked through it.
Speaker 1: Did you go over there? I didn't. I sat there.
Speaker 1: We just talked for like ten minutes and then I
Speaker 1: just need to say it, you really get it out?
Speaker 1: Why is that like earlier on if you remember here,
Speaker 1: like I just immediately had to cry because you know,
Speaker 1: you just have all these things you're going through and
Speaker 1: you're stressed out, and it's like, as soon as you
Speaker 1: can cry and get it out to your girlfriends, why
Speaker 1: do you feel so much better? I feel't know have
Speaker 1: girlfriends or someone to say that too, are miserable people.
Speaker 1: I mean, I just feel like any sadness only lives
Speaker 1: like once you bring light to something that can't exist anymore.
Speaker 1: Like that, Yeah, and you have to be able to
Speaker 1: say that really start most things. And there are the
Speaker 1: things that you don't want to bring line too, are
Speaker 1: the things that are like the most insecure, the most vulnerable,
Speaker 1: the most like exposing yourself in a way where you're
Speaker 1: not like this strong warrior process because wait, let's all
Speaker 1: just submit. Those do not exist. That's the problem. We
Speaker 1: think they do. They do in Hollywood. They don't. They
Speaker 1: don't in Nashville or any other city I've lived in. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's not real. And you're not treat a place with
Speaker 1: you because your hair is gonna block on the video
Speaker 1: or nothing. We're really easy in the video, but you're
Speaker 1: so pretty and when people not see your face, you know,
Speaker 1: I just play you that have a update that my
Speaker 1: package for Amazon was delivered a Mango Girls Stay Classy
Speaker 1: t shirts? Did you get one for all of us?
Speaker 1: I'm doing okay. I mean, if if you're not getting
Speaker 1: that set for Christmas, it's over. Listen, I claim Blanche, Okay,
Speaker 1: you would. I would like to be you are. You're
Speaker 1: way prettier than Dorothy. But your reasonable like Dorothy. Oh,
Speaker 1: it's kind of like saying, must be Miranda, you know,
Speaker 1: but like Mariana is the really level headed one. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but she's she's always a carouchy. This is a little
Speaker 1: Oh she's so Hia. Yeah, you're a mixed train Dorothy
Speaker 1: and Sophia. Is that gonna make HER's gon tax a point? Now? Anyways,
Speaker 1: I was gonna I'm gonna finished this thought because we
Speaker 1: will lose it because I was inspired to hand it
Speaker 1: over to cat. That's what we were saying, What were
Speaker 1: you handing over to God? Everything is? It's not calling apart.
Speaker 1: I mean, we're fine. It's just but also we like
Speaker 1: to control it and have it be a certain way
Speaker 1: that you want it in your mind. We're in a
Speaker 1: season of abundance, and abundance is a good thing. I
Speaker 1: wrote a little post about this, but like it's all
Speaker 1: the things. It's babies and songs, it's too ring, it's
Speaker 1: NFL and pepsi, and it's all these really great things.
Speaker 1: But all these really great things are just all at once,
Speaker 1: and someone has to hold the home front down, and
Speaker 1: someone has to get on a bus, and we've the
Speaker 1: other someone with a screaming infant to call her friend.
Speaker 1: So I just had that moment with you last week
Speaker 1: where I was like, Okay, I've got to get all
Speaker 1: the way down. I just got to unpack all of it,
Speaker 1: and then I just have to hand it over. And
Speaker 1: then essentially every time I try to take it back
Speaker 1: or being control of my marriage, I say, essentially going
Speaker 1: to God, insane, I'll take that back because I can
Speaker 1: do better than you. But we know that's not true.
Speaker 1: So it's like a good reminder, you know. And I
Speaker 1: feel like he keeps looking like over the last week,
Speaker 1: I feel like God is like, oh, here's she come again,
Speaker 1: and I just turn around, take a you turn right
Speaker 1: before I get to them. It's hard to turn around, though, Lady,
Speaker 1: you're really good about this. You're talking about that how
Speaker 1: especially like preparing for motherhood, how you have to learn
Speaker 1: how to well, I'm trying to prepare for motherhood. How
Speaker 1: you have to learn how to give it over to
Speaker 1: God or else you'll just self destruct completely. I mean,
Speaker 1: because you're nervous when you're pregnant, this sonth is going
Speaker 1: to go wrong. And I'm always scared that, like even
Speaker 1: before getting pregnant, that I'm going to kill the child
Speaker 1: before I get pregnant by something I do, which look
Speaker 1: always back to fear. Nothing good comes from fear period
Speaker 1: your point in life and whether you're trying to get pregnant,
Speaker 1: where you're trying to start a business, where you're trying
Speaker 1: to I don't know anything. You cannot have fear. But
Speaker 1: my whole thing was you can be nervous before getting pregnant.
Speaker 1: Why are you getting pregnant? Then you're nervous about the birth.
Speaker 1: Then you're nervous about him coming home and die? Who
Speaker 1: said the first however long back him? You know the
Speaker 1: nervous about I mean, I homo sex yeld you undergard
Speaker 1: is the schools say, and your nursalizes getting like if
Speaker 1: you do not get a grip on an understanding, like
Speaker 1: every day it is a daily choice to be like
Speaker 1: I aren't living fear about my people today. It's a
Speaker 1: long road. How do you get a grip doing it
Speaker 1: every day? And how do you when you are talking
Speaker 1: to God, when say you're in the depths of one
Speaker 1: of these um spirals, which I can easily find myself
Speaker 1: even though like I it's I run it because I'm
Speaker 1: one of those people who like preaches, have faith, preaches,
Speaker 1: trust preaches all that. But when it comes to myself
Speaker 1: and when I find myself in a situation where I
Speaker 1: really want something or really you know, you're trying to
Speaker 1: almost force it. It's like you almost ex God out
Speaker 1: of the equation. When in every other part of my life,
Speaker 1: when it's going great, you're smooth, it's like, oh yeah, God,
Speaker 1: it's totally control. He's He's the man. But then when
Speaker 1: it's not going exactly how you wanted it to go,
Speaker 1: it's easy for me just to start having so much
Speaker 1: doubt and fear. If I is twitching at you again,
Speaker 1: like it what you're saying. So what do you tell
Speaker 1: yourself in those moments? I mean, I think it's just
Speaker 1: the ultimate belief that God is in control and telling
Speaker 1: yourself down on a daily basis when you can't make
Speaker 1: sense of things, because I've seen plenty of things that
Speaker 1: I can't make sense of, but I've seen plenty of
Speaker 1: goodness and love and positivity in the world too, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. I think it's what you choose
Speaker 1: to focus on, at least for me. I mean, if
Speaker 1: I'm focusing on where in the world is this world
Speaker 1: going right now? And kids these days and whatever, then
Speaker 1: I'm gonna see it. Oh. I just had a little
Speaker 1: truth bomb come in my head. So we talked about
Speaker 1: my Amish friends before. I have Amish friends, um, and
Speaker 1: this was on their wall, cross stitched on their wall,
Speaker 1: and it says, what you see in a person mostly
Speaker 1: depends on what you're looking for. Oh okay, So I
Speaker 1: really enjoyed that. Let you see in a person mostly
Speaker 1: depends on what you're looking for, And so I the
Speaker 1: worlds feel like I need a little lay down with
Speaker 1: that sentence for a minute. So if you're going to
Speaker 1: see bad and negative and hurt, if that's what you're
Speaker 1: out this, fine, that's what you're gonna find. There you go,
Speaker 1: dang lame. Also, if you think about like leaning and
Speaker 1: I talked about all the time, like when you start
Speaker 1: to panic about kids, how their God's kids first. You know,
Speaker 1: every baby is God's baby's first. We're God's kids before,
Speaker 1: we're our parents kids. But I think we just really
Speaker 1: I don't know. I feel like so many times you're like, Okay,
Speaker 1: they're God's kids first, their God kids first, and then
Speaker 1: you try to take the control back. But like, ultimately
Speaker 1: it's like that with anyone if you're just looking for
Speaker 1: like there's so much more good in the world. Like
Speaker 1: I get fearful to go to Target. Okay, Tart tar J,
Speaker 1: there's something happening outside. I feel like our house, your
Speaker 1: house is getting cut down. I just a hard house.
Speaker 1: I don't know where they are. Um, it's like I'm
Speaker 1: fearful of going to Target because I've read like too
Speaker 1: many stories about the kids being technic from Target. Yes,
Speaker 1: how do the kids get take from Target? You don't
Speaker 1: want to know. It's like, well, it's like this is
Speaker 1: why I cried twice in labor, so I was like,
Speaker 1: please don't come out of me, like I can protect
Speaker 1: you where you are, Like I get freaked out when
Speaker 1: they're on their way out. Stay in forever. If you're
Speaker 1: protected and you're way easier to travel with and I
Speaker 1: love you. Um, and you really depending on my heartbeat,
Speaker 1: which is so like hopeless romantic about it. Anyways, it's
Speaker 1: all of those things. I don't know where I was
Speaker 1: going with that, but it's just fearful and it's not fair.
Speaker 1: Like there's also so many good things when you're out
Speaker 1: in public, and there's like, you know, sweet old people
Speaker 1: that are like I mean, I had those nineties six
Speaker 1: year old woman stopny in Costco because she just wanted
Speaker 1: to look inside the car seat because Legend was sleeping,
Speaker 1: and she was like, who's in there? It's really sweet?
Speaker 1: She said how old and which? And she was like,
Speaker 1: I've got five babies. I mean, just use a walker.
Speaker 1: That's somebody's mama, you know. And then like there's more
Speaker 1: of that happening at Costco that day than there is
Speaker 1: baby stealing. I know. It's like there's like, okay, so
Speaker 1: you have ad to work within a day and just
Speaker 1: just wasting two minutes of your podcast but no, you know,
Speaker 1: but so you have a hundred percent of energy to
Speaker 1: work within a day, and nine percent of it is
Speaker 1: great things, Like there's so many blessings you can be
Speaker 1: thankful for, but then there's this two percent of fear
Speaker 1: that's really dark fear that's like awful things that are
Speaker 1: just like the worst things ever. And if you spend
Speaker 1: all of your energy focusing on that two percent, and
Speaker 1: that two percent of darkness takes over your whole life
Speaker 1: when really you're just laser focusing in on that, when
Speaker 1: you could be focusing on exactly what you said, on
Speaker 1: the things that you want to see. But it's like
Speaker 1: it's because we know our Once we like and visualize
Speaker 1: or like know our worst fears out there, we get
Speaker 1: so scared and if we think if we worry about
Speaker 1: it and keep it close, that won't happen. That really,
Speaker 1: if you worry about and keep your fears close, you're
Speaker 1: just living in your fear. But necessarily, let's like think
Speaker 1: about okay, just this may be done. But like I
Speaker 1: always just think about the sky. It's a great big sky.
Speaker 1: But one cloud cancels out the sun in two seconds,
Speaker 1: you know, Like so just shift it through, like keep
Speaker 1: it moving, wins and change. Maybe that's why I don't
Speaker 1: get stuck on that cloud? Do they say that? That's
Speaker 1: what they said it. I'm on to yoga this week
Speaker 1: because the first time I'm like five, And did you
Speaker 1: love it? I do love it if every time I go,
Speaker 1: I'm like, I need to this every day. But at
Speaker 1: the beginning of class, when you're like laying then you're like,
Speaker 1: that gets really it's really hot in here. And he said,
Speaker 1: let every thought that comes across room and float away
Speaker 1: like a clouds like that one. It was because I
Speaker 1: did I have a worrying about something that after named
Speaker 1: like not crazy word, but like something you need to
Speaker 1: be doing any when did Walker had his spook back
Speaker 1: ready before I left, blah blah blah, and I just
Speaker 1: like started letting them pass away. So I think it's
Speaker 1: taken not to you percent I'm letting you passed away,
Speaker 1: and don't get hooked on it. Don't get hooked on
Speaker 1: that because like if you get hooked on that one
Speaker 1: rain cloud, then that one rain cloud is your whole sky.
Speaker 1: Or if you just let it float away, then all
Speaker 1: of a sudden you've got a sunny sky and you
Speaker 1: could be back in sunshine. And even those rain clouds
Speaker 1: are bringing all sorts of good things once they move,
Speaker 1: So take the quick lesson from it, but don't get
Speaker 1: hung up on it and let it overtake your entire life.
Speaker 1: It doesn't need to be you. That is the thing.
Speaker 1: Like skip it, just skip over it, notice it, get
Speaker 1: the lesson and skip. Keep moving. Yeah, don't get hung
Speaker 1: be thankful for whatever goodness you can find in your
Speaker 1: own life, and then go back and focus on the good. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we got pumpkins, is your surprise. I love some fall,
Speaker 1: but this chick does seasons. I don't know why, because
Speaker 1: it makes you feel so happy seasons because she has antline.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm such a bound book about Halloween. You are.
Speaker 1: But after this, when this is over, we're gonna go
Speaker 1: downstairs and see what happens when you start seasons too early?
Speaker 1: What have been most discussing? Roddy roddy upon it and
Speaker 1: downstairs we started and we started this season, And like
Speaker 1: August's Tea, you should start as soon as you can.
Speaker 1: I know that suppose not thinking, but they don't show
Speaker 1: you this on Peteress Pumpkin. When you start and as
Speaker 1: it's big, you think about it. Okay, explain what it
Speaker 1: means to you. I don't know. Just am I too
Speaker 1: much today? I feel like it just really is. Why
Speaker 1: would you be too much? Really you're too much? And
Speaker 1: banking that you're too much? No, it's just like what
Speaker 1: a sentence, you know, like people to say certain things
Speaker 1: in it just you're like, wow, that's really something like
Speaker 1: if you start a season two Sam like, don't jump
Speaker 1: the gun. Yeah, don't don't force it. Don't force a season. Hey,
Speaker 1: I just found this quote. Okay, I can't redeem myself here.
Speaker 1: You don't need to redee yourself. Everything you're doing, you're
Speaker 1: having the bad self talk right now is self talk
Speaker 1: on bad self talk, And that has been something that
Speaker 1: I have been in a drinking game. We're drinking too, munch,
Speaker 1: but I have been really working on my self talk
Speaker 1: and I want to keep talking about that to everyone listening,
Speaker 1: because you've been a perfect example. Sorry I'm using as
Speaker 1: an example, but it's so easy for us to talk
Speaker 1: bad to ourselves quickly, like put ourselves down. If my
Speaker 1: daughter is like a little freaking sponge is literally Christen
Speaker 1: two point out at home right now. Like I showed
Speaker 1: her a picture from her of herself from a year
Speaker 1: ago and I said, love, this is you, and she said,
Speaker 1: oh my gosh, I can't even handle that, like your
Speaker 1: two and a half. But like they're using you know,
Speaker 1: they're just watching and I'm like I like, Mom, we're
Speaker 1: really on this. We're really struggle bussing today. Struggle busting.
Speaker 1: She told me, unbelievable, But it's true because it's like,
Speaker 1: you know, if I haven't talking about how I don't
Speaker 1: like the way I look, she's gonna know that's the reality. Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: So this quote that I found said she's not afraid
Speaker 1: to wait anymore for she knows that God will open
Speaker 1: doors beautiful and perfect in their time. I love that.
Speaker 1: So starting the season to Stanleys, you with rodd and pumpkins, Oh, yes,
Speaker 1: that's good, but no want to clean them up except
Speaker 1: for yourself, right because I've loved him out there. Coryat
Speaker 1: noticed them? Did he even notice that you got him? Yeah?
Speaker 1: They're decorated. They're cute, like make you Mouse and Batman
Speaker 1: did little kids, didials on a couple down everything. And
Speaker 1: she comes over now she's like, we're paying pumpkins, but
Speaker 1: I do you know, Like there's that's the beauty and
Speaker 1: just really coming into the season when you're supposed to
Speaker 1: and embracing the journey a little bit and getting you know,
Speaker 1: just soaking up what you're meant to soak up, and
Speaker 1: not rushing a season I just said, I was just
Speaker 1: telling you all this. I did a meditation today and
Speaker 1: the meditation was, imagine yourself staying on a park bench
Speaker 1: with your with yourself twenty years from now, so your
Speaker 1: twenty year old, twenty year old future version self. And
Speaker 1: what would your twenty year old future self say to
Speaker 1: you now in the middle of all this, Like what
Speaker 1: would she look down? She'd put her arm around you,
Speaker 1: and what would she say to you right now? Camo
Speaker 1: is still a neutral always, Um, yeah, that's what would
Speaker 1: What advice would she tell you? Like what would she
Speaker 1: tell you that she loved the most about the past
Speaker 1: twenty years? And what would she tell you? What would
Speaker 1: what would she said? You're saying this it makes me tearful.
Speaker 1: I know it's because I really think she's just like,
Speaker 1: enjoy your life, like stop making problems out and not
Speaker 1: problem problems. Yes, it's like stop rushing, stop freaking out.
Speaker 1: My dad said it was a couple of years ago
Speaker 1: when we were talking earlier, like we were not in
Speaker 1: the season of success. I mean we were like verge
Speaker 1: of it, whatever success is. But you know what I mean,
Speaker 1: Like you're you're sitting your stressed out of all things
Speaker 1: and where is this career going to go? And whatnot?
Speaker 1: And my dad said, you two are living in the
Speaker 1: best days of your life. And you don't even know
Speaker 1: what I think of that quote all the time. I
Speaker 1: love that. I don't even if he remember that, But
Speaker 1: that's coming from someone at the time that it's probably sixty,
Speaker 1: but it is. It's the big middle of everything. You know,
Speaker 1: we're all young adults, were all happily married, have family,
Speaker 1: starting families. This is like great careers that were all
Speaker 1: excited about all of the homes that music built. That's beautiful, thinking,
Speaker 1: that's amazing. A lot of people in Nashville that can't
Speaker 1: say that it's a blessing. And it's like I feel
Speaker 1: guilty for not feeling blessed all the time because I
Speaker 1: look at my life and right now y'all obviously knows,
Speaker 1: but like we're a season. I'm starting to try for
Speaker 1: a baby and wanting baby, and it's just like, you know,
Speaker 1: it's God's timing, and so like whenever I stress about it,
Speaker 1: I feel guilty about stressing because it's like, what am
Speaker 1: I upset about? Because God is this blessed me so much?
Speaker 1: Why would I get greedy about another blessing and try
Speaker 1: to jump the gun for when that's supposed to come
Speaker 1: in my life. Like I feel I feel guilty for
Speaker 1: not being noticing my blessings all the time. You told
Speaker 1: me you can have what greefs grief and gratitude in
Speaker 1: the singes And I just wrote a blog I'm gonna
Speaker 1: publish for you guys. Wow, Beth at Porter's Call, who
Speaker 1: is like Joanna Gaines and Burnee Brown had a baby.
Speaker 1: It could be best. It's best she can we all
Speaker 1: go to know? Can both packing every everyone should have
Speaker 1: a bath. How do you get to go talk to Beth?
Speaker 1: I need to talk to both. We can get you
Speaker 1: to talk to both. Great. Beth is the best, the
Speaker 1: most christlike heart. I can't she's She's phenomenal. There's not
Speaker 1: no words. But Beth and I were talking the other
Speaker 1: day because I said, I feel like I this is
Speaker 1: probably its circling back to the marriage part. But it's like,
Speaker 1: you know, we have this great gratitude that we have
Speaker 1: this big season and success. But like and some people
Speaker 1: on Instagram start to catch on, like low Cash posted
Speaker 1: a photo and Vegas and I'm posting a photo in Nashville,
Speaker 1: Like we're never together, like as a family, hardly ever
Speaker 1: right now. And so it's hard because you want to
Speaker 1: be said thankful for all that, but then you're also like, well,
Speaker 1: dang it, I wish I had my husband and my
Speaker 1: baby daddy home. When I told him the other day,
Speaker 1: I feel a little bit like I traded him for
Speaker 1: these two babies. Like I don't get to have everybody
Speaker 1: all at once. I get, and so when I do,
Speaker 1: I have to operate out of black you know, like
Speaker 1: it's not I'm not operating out of abundance at all.
Speaker 1: And when I get him home and like, how are
Speaker 1: we gonna you know, we're speed dating life, And it's
Speaker 1: like it said, when maybe we should just let it
Speaker 1: be for that said, I can have grief and gratitude
Speaker 1: at the same time. So how do you walk that line?
Speaker 1: What is that to you? I think it's just saying,
Speaker 1: you know, some this makes me sad, but focusing on
Speaker 1: a positive. I mean, it's like simplified as that is.
Speaker 1: It's just going, that's really sad. But then I also
Speaker 1: have this, you know, like it doesn't have to be
Speaker 1: one or the other. You could have them both. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's what we're talking about. Earlier because I'm in the
Speaker 1: season of I've operated and right and wrong in black
Speaker 1: and oh yeah, life your creativity and I'm realizing why
Speaker 1: that kind of am a creative by nature? So creative,
Speaker 1: but you know I have to Guy's saying you're too great.
Speaker 1: I know, but I've never wanted to clarify. I'm coming
Speaker 1: out with an album like the new single drop in Productions,
Speaker 1: not coming out with an album, but it's it's to
Speaker 1: be okay with things, not having to have an A
Speaker 1: R B answer, and there isn't. It's okay, you can
Speaker 1: lean the gray. So what are you learning? Because you're
Speaker 1: redecka in your house right now, and this is when
Speaker 1: you're having your big revelation because you're scared you're gonna
Speaker 1: mess it up or something. Love decorating, But are you
Speaker 1: scared to pull the trigger? Because I'm a prey to
Speaker 1: making their own decisions. So there's twenty awesome couches. I'm
Speaker 1: definitely gonna pick the wrong one from my house. But
Speaker 1: how do you know if it's wrong or right? Because
Speaker 1: there isn't her owner right. But in your your internal
Speaker 1: voice that's talking to you and dictating these fears, what
Speaker 1: is that voice saying to you, like, because I feel
Speaker 1: that way too. It just like trying to have a
Speaker 1: baby and stuff. I'm scared I gona do everything wrong,
Speaker 1: but really there's no there isn't always the wrong or wrong.
Speaker 1: So what is your voice telling you about the twenty
Speaker 1: perfect couches? The twenty perfect couches? What they represent to
Speaker 1: me is I don't control. To me is black and white, right, wrong, okay,
Speaker 1: and it's okay. So I were best friends. You know,
Speaker 1: life is easier, we think if we are in control,
Speaker 1: if we can make the right decision and wrong decision
Speaker 1: like operates in some form of I don't know, like Grid.
Speaker 1: That's just not why I have the rules us. But
Speaker 1: I've met christin us that we gotta cut the string
Speaker 1: to your bag of rules you're carrying around with you,
Speaker 1: because you just had the rules for everything. We'll get
Speaker 1: into that after. So I didn't really want to know
Speaker 1: what these rules were, so I didn't know you then
Speaker 1: I was not in this trio. Yeah, but I wouldn't
Speaker 1: have you if I had all the rules. Probably it's
Speaker 1: probably good to cut. I'll tell you. I definitely wouldn't
Speaker 1: have either of you if I didn't have the rules
Speaker 1: if that makes sense, because the rules made it so
Speaker 1: that I couldn't move or fall in love fast or
Speaker 1: want to baby fast or the cat is my biggest
Speaker 1: anti rule. He's my anti rule. Okay, Okay. I would
Speaker 1: have never had you because you've got have been a
Speaker 1: voice to men. I never would have met you on
Speaker 1: bended knee because you'd have never done anything. I'm never
Speaker 1: would have called her about I never remb my man
Speaker 1: her instagram a little bit fancy. It was like this
Speaker 1: really put together, A beautiful woman follows me at the
Speaker 1: value um, twenty couches to me represent twenty right answers. Okay,
Speaker 1: so how do you know how to pick one? If
Speaker 1: they're all right? Which just big ones? So what happens
Speaker 1: when you pick one? Are you gonna think you get
Speaker 1: the wrong one? Got the second guess too? No, I'm not,
Speaker 1: because that's the point in that, Like what is your
Speaker 1: what is your brain telling you? Hey, there's those twenty
Speaker 1: couches represent twenty really awesome way used in my house
Speaker 1: to book whit one is no better than another, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean? Like I don't know, that's just
Speaker 1: the new little season. I mean, obviously something's that right,
Speaker 1: But she'd always an athlete, to which I think plays
Speaker 1: into that like black and white and perfectuates. Yeah, like
Speaker 1: there's a skill, you go learn it, and then you
Speaker 1: learn another skill, and there's there's a way to do
Speaker 1: things you learn play out of that. Yeah, sorry about this.
Speaker 1: You all play very good defense. But that's a kiddy
Speaker 1: shoot a really awesome three partner. Yes, you know. It
Speaker 1: was parameters And so now that it's not even just
Speaker 1: redecorating this like with this mom blog concept thing, it's
Speaker 1: form relief, which is hysterical because you're so funny, like
Speaker 1: so funny. It's so funny, funny because when I started out,
Speaker 1: I could have just as easily loved to hit him
Speaker 1: for No. One to five and print my little Instagram
Speaker 1: books out from it would be happy. But I love
Speaker 1: it and I'm enjoyed people are responding. But it takes
Speaker 1: a bravery to put that stuff out there, you know,
Speaker 1: to like go public with your heart and soul. That
Speaker 1: is being a creative and that is why I want
Speaker 1: in your dirty car. But that is why people who
Speaker 1: are creative people, which you are, and I'm glad you're
Speaker 1: claiming this now. It is very intimidating to put yourself
Speaker 1: out there because this is coming from the depths of
Speaker 1: your soul and your brain and the knot, and you
Speaker 1: put it out there and you're like, oh freak, what
Speaker 1: if everyone thinks it's stupid? But I think I couldn't
Speaker 1: have done this ten years ago because I wasn't confident,
Speaker 1: okay with go was now. I really don't mean the
Speaker 1: usde of God didn't like me, because which would never have.
Speaker 1: I'm just saying the rest of you got your people
Speaker 1: as much. I mean, every now and then does it
Speaker 1: does that like seventh grade comparison and oh my goodness
Speaker 1: and all I tid of not keeping yes, but those
Speaker 1: are that's the exception. Now that's not the rule anymore.
Speaker 1: I love, But I don't know, it's just kind of
Speaker 1: like so much easier to sort. Yeah. I went to
Speaker 1: sam not that long ago, and I remember meeting someone
Speaker 1: who on Instagram was this person that I really was like,
Speaker 1: this is amazing, this is like one of my people.
Speaker 1: And then I got there and I was like, not
Speaker 1: my people sorted quickly. It just was not my people
Speaker 1: and you just get it, you know it. And I
Speaker 1: wasn't offended or you know, I was just like, oh
Speaker 1: it wasn't a match. Yeah, it's fine, It's totally fine.
Speaker 1: Doesn't make anything's wrong with them or anything's wrong with you.
Speaker 1: I always say two really great people to always make
Speaker 1: a great couple. Usually that's for days. So weak friends,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Coworkers like maybe have two
Speaker 1: great people but together on a match? Mean these one's broken.
Speaker 1: I love that. Yes, I used to have to feel
Speaker 1: like my eyes twitch again. I'm sorry, I just has
Speaker 1: to twitch, guys. It just makes me feel like I'm
Speaker 1: doing a really good job. Even really are really great.
Speaker 1: I used. I don't even notice it. I really, I
Speaker 1: really don't. It's because her eyes are so pretty. I
Speaker 1: used to feel like that I had to make everyone
Speaker 1: like me that I had to hired. Were you? I
Speaker 1: think that's one thirty five and exhausted, and I'm in
Speaker 1: this season of like zero Fox because I just like
Speaker 1: I have my best friends, I have my family, I
Speaker 1: have my amazing husband. We have this beautiful life that
Speaker 1: we've built and to work so hard at building and
Speaker 1: start gone through so many ups and downs to get here,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, I just and done chasing. I'm done
Speaker 1: chasing anything right now. I mean, maybe I'll jump back
Speaker 1: on the hamster at some point, But in this season,
Speaker 1: I'm done chasing career. I'm done chasing people and done
Speaker 1: chasing acceptance. You can throw the hamster will away. I
Speaker 1: don't jump back. I'm done with the hamster. Well, I've
Speaker 1: been on the hamster in my whole life, just trying
Speaker 1: to keep up, trying to keep it moving, trying to
Speaker 1: make sure everyone thinks I'm awesome and great and nice
Speaker 1: and good. I haven't accepted, and it's like, okay, I
Speaker 1: am good enough. Here's the one thing I'm good enough,
Speaker 1: and then you were born. People are good enough? Why
Speaker 1: we forget? Why do we forget that? I don't know why.
Speaker 1: I think the world we allow the world to tell
Speaker 1: us something different. We allow other people's success to telling
Speaker 1: something different. But you are no more valuable today with
Speaker 1: all the things you've done or haven't done in the
Speaker 1: day you took your first breath, you really aren't no one.
Speaker 1: And you feel like I used to feel like I
Speaker 1: had to get all these like stamps of validation to
Speaker 1: be like, this is why you should love me because
Speaker 1: look at what I have done? Or don't you love
Speaker 1: me for all these things I have done? It's a retired,
Speaker 1: retired artist mentality. What does that mean? Like it's it's
Speaker 1: not the chase, oh, because I've had an artist mentality always,
Speaker 1: just like this chase mentality just gotta get there, got
Speaker 1: to get there? Where where am I trying to get? Where?
Speaker 1: I want to disclaim that there is to me two
Speaker 1: types of artists, like the ones that are chasing for
Speaker 1: something empty and then the ones that just can't live
Speaker 1: a day without doing their craft because who they are
Speaker 1: and they're absolutely waiting without that and that's just their
Speaker 1: true God given talent and that's who it is there being,
Speaker 1: which I think is all of our husbands, brilliant and
Speaker 1: beautiful and disable. I just I love being here. I
Speaker 1: loving at this spot, even though like I'm kind of
Speaker 1: in a season of just like chilling and like wondering
Speaker 1: what's the next step, Like you know, honestly we want
Speaker 1: to start family and all that and just kind of
Speaker 1: waiting for that to happen. But it's just I'm so
Speaker 1: happy to be here that in this place of peace
Speaker 1: where it's like I know who I am now and
Speaker 1: I'm learning to love myself just as I am at
Speaker 1: least that's into like that takes a lot of time
Speaker 1: and effort for me at least, know, like divorced in
Speaker 1: it for me the darkest, darkest, darkest dar because I
Speaker 1: met you when you were not in the middle of
Speaker 1: bringing up day life before it was no good, no
Speaker 1: good BC before owner know. I just remember like I
Speaker 1: went through really really dark. I didn't like myself. I
Speaker 1: made a lot of poor decisions. It was just dark,
Speaker 1: dark dark. Not me. But why is it when we're
Speaker 1: going through something that throws our whole life up in
Speaker 1: the air. Why is it that we feel like we're
Speaker 1: that whole mess? Like we feel like we are that mess,
Speaker 1: that that is who we are. Yeah, I don't know
Speaker 1: if it's part of like walking in it and carrying
Speaker 1: it until you can shed it as you walk and
Speaker 1: keep beating forward against did you almost feel like ashamed
Speaker 1: of it or something? Or it just was ugly? It
Speaker 1: was not a good time. But then I remember it's sorted.
Speaker 1: I think all those big life changes always do the
Speaker 1: most god like, the most god sorting in your life.
Speaker 1: Like it just sheds every big life change sheds. Miscarriage
Speaker 1: shed for me like people energy, you know. And I
Speaker 1: remember at the end of divorce, like I just had
Speaker 1: this like new confidence because I just decided like that
Speaker 1: person who is a fine person, and that nine years
Speaker 1: it was just not me and I don't have to
Speaker 1: carry it anymore because I I'm not that like it's
Speaker 1: a part of my story, but it's not my story.
Speaker 1: This may sound like to like basic the story thing,
Speaker 1: but it's like you just get to a point where
Speaker 1: you're like, this is what I know. What I know
Speaker 1: about myself is where I had to go. I know
Speaker 1: I operate out of love percent at the time. I
Speaker 1: never need to hurt anybody's feelings. That I can say
Speaker 1: that like that is a truth to me. I would
Speaker 1: never intentionally ever hurt anyone's feelings. I love all people.
Speaker 1: I speak kinder to other people than I do to
Speaker 1: myself self talk. Yes, So like I operate out of
Speaker 1: love and I operate out of integrity. So when I
Speaker 1: go to bed at night, I just have to know
Speaker 1: that I at least I'm the only one that has
Speaker 1: to go to sleep with me. Ultimately, even when I'm
Speaker 1: laying next to my husband the two months out of
Speaker 1: the year that I get to do that, I know
Speaker 1: that it's I've done the best I can do in
Speaker 1: a day and I did it all for the right
Speaker 1: reasons in my heart. And so if people you start
Speaker 1: to slowly but surely learn that like, certain people don't
Speaker 1: fit in your life anymore. There's people that want there's
Speaker 1: people that want to assume you failed or assume that
Speaker 1: you're I don't know, there's just there's a certain type
Speaker 1: of person that it's someone who's stuck themselves. And if
Speaker 1: you're you, I could never do anything to either of
Speaker 1: you that you would be like I cannot believe Kristen
Speaker 1: did that you'd be like there. Surely she did not
Speaker 1: need to say it that way. You know that your
Speaker 1: intentions are always true. It would never question me. I
Speaker 1: feel that What is it though, that so when you
Speaker 1: meet people that you're like, M like, I don't I
Speaker 1: only have people that love and support me. I think
Speaker 1: it's so. I think that's when someone else is stuck though.
Speaker 1: I think you have to be in kind of a
Speaker 1: bad place yourself to be wanting someone else to not thrive.
Speaker 1: Do you think for someone to not be their ear
Speaker 1: with them, Like, if you don't want someone else to thrive,
Speaker 1: it's because its loves company, Like you don't want you know,
Speaker 1: you wanted anybody rooting for me to fail me. Anybody
Speaker 1: like pointing out work, like, but isn't that terrible that
Speaker 1: that's even out there, that that's a thing, that that's
Speaker 1: just basicly jealous you blocked about. It's called how a
Speaker 1: dead smelly rat changed my life. Okay, I don't know
Speaker 1: if you've had a chance to you just break it up.
Speaker 1: In a couple weeks ago, I went to get my
Speaker 1: oil changed. I was running in there like a frantic
Speaker 1: crazy mom. I'm man, cleaning my car out of my
Speaker 1: car is a disasters on. I'll just be on there
Speaker 1: a dead rat in your car? No for I put
Speaker 1: out of my car like that mom, and I was like,
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry. To the mechanic, I was like, my
Speaker 1: car is a miss just please don't look at it.
Speaker 1: It's horrible at such a mom car. And he goes, ma'am,
Speaker 1: I just pulled a dead smelly rat out of the
Speaker 1: car and burn them. You to your car is fun? Seriously.
Speaker 1: Within two seconds, all of a sudden, I was like,
Speaker 1: I'm crushing it. I'm doing so great. Oh that lady's
Speaker 1: got a dead I don't have a dead rat. And
Speaker 1: I felt really great, like go ahay, look at my
Speaker 1: dirt in my dirt, you know. But the more I
Speaker 1: thought about it, it bothered me that someone else's dead rats,
Speaker 1: someone else's flaw made you feel better. We feel validated.
Speaker 1: And so this whole log is about how many dead
Speaker 1: rats do we see? Other people that like bring out
Speaker 1: our comparison and oh I'm better, Okay, I'm not as
Speaker 1: bad as that, or it just made me Realiz was like,
Speaker 1: I cannot let someone else's junk dictate how I feel
Speaker 1: about myself. Well, I think it's like, even though we
Speaker 1: all try so hard not to get in the comparison game,
Speaker 1: and like we all love our lives, I do think
Speaker 1: something about knowing you're not alone in the struggle. It
Speaker 1: is courting, like totally confidence. It's like, oh okay, great,
Speaker 1: I thought I was the only one who was a
Speaker 1: hot mess, but that person had a dead rat, so
Speaker 1: like freak, We're all hot mess. It makes you feel
Speaker 1: like validated. It's best we're still looking for that. Looking
Speaker 1: for validation is something someone else is doing. Yeah, And
Speaker 1: so I mean it was that is in need of
Speaker 1: community too, I guess. But I think it takes like
Speaker 1: the small step to just say it and then everybody
Speaker 1: else is like, okay, the same, the same, but I
Speaker 1: hear what you're saying because it's like catch training cheek
Speaker 1: is part of It's like, Okay, we're all on this together,
Speaker 1: we're all doing the best they can. We all have
Speaker 1: dead rats. But then it's also like, why do I
Speaker 1: need someone else's dead rat to make me feel good about? Right?
Speaker 1: And I mean something worse than like my where my
Speaker 1: car showed up that day? Then not feel suprad me
Speaker 1: when I'm like okay, like I should have just own it.
Speaker 1: I have a messy car. I'm gon get it clean
Speaker 1: on him to the clean and soig do I threw
Speaker 1: the goldfish up. I gonna get even fin. It's fine,
Speaker 1: you know, but it's fine. They love it. Let's take
Speaker 1: a beach truck last day ago. They love it. Hey, Carolina,
Speaker 1: pat like Betty was just like cal pow days helsing
Speaker 1: and Carolina some that you're gonna listen to this dog.
Speaker 1: I want you to know that your aunt Christina loves
Speaker 1: you very much when you were only teething. But when
Speaker 1: we get back and I think Preston was he walks
Speaker 1: in and has hands full of put handfulls, handsfull, handfuls handpules.
Speaker 1: That's a hard handsful that his hands rule um pups.
Speaker 1: And he was like Kristen like this, I mean it
Speaker 1: was massive, so that's just O a role. But I mean,
Speaker 1: I think it's just at the end of the day,
Speaker 1: there are no perfect people. Guys. The minute I and
Speaker 1: I know this is like super intense, but it's like
Speaker 1: the minute I put out that we lost a baby,
Speaker 1: everyone was waiting. All these beautiful women were just waiting
Speaker 1: to say same, like every no one. And that was
Speaker 1: my biggest lesson in that loss, was that like grief
Speaker 1: and gratitude at the same time, is that we're just
Speaker 1: all waiting for someone to say it. Like it's every giant,
Speaker 1: giant loss is coming with something so much bigger. It's
Speaker 1: crazy to me, Like these women were all like missing
Speaker 1: I said it in the blog somewhere or in the
Speaker 1: room because you were twelve weeks right, yeah, but it's like, yes, yes,
Speaker 1: I was baby line to love that little nugget, but
Speaker 1: like it is it It's crazy because I'm like you
Speaker 1: just you're in the greatest loss. I learned that miscarriage,
Speaker 1: which makes us human. Dead rats make us human. Messy
Speaker 1: cars make us human, like bad self talk makes us human.
Speaker 1: All of these things, it's none of it is you're
Speaker 1: No one has exempt from these things. So while we
Speaker 1: all look good on paper and Instagram, and I mean,
Speaker 1: I lost a baby, just like someone that works in
Speaker 1: a cubicle loses a baby. Just like somebody that picks
Speaker 1: up my garbage loses a baby. Just like somebody that's
Speaker 1: a brain surgeon loses a baby. Just like people that
Speaker 1: are IBF adaptors lose babies. I mean, think about it.
Speaker 1: No one's exempts. So all of these like they're just human.
Speaker 1: Humifying it's not a word, make it one sounds good
Speaker 1: today is humifying moment where you're just just it just
Speaker 1: levels the playing field. And I think that that's also
Speaker 1: to go back to the debt or rat and this also,
Speaker 1: I don't think it's wrong to want to feel connected
Speaker 1: to other people. And it's not like you want other
Speaker 1: people to fail or be in a bad place, but
Speaker 1: it's just like, oh, thank God that we're connected. This
Speaker 1: is how Laney Crowder became a very best friend. I
Speaker 1: was like a missy car just like all the things,
Speaker 1: Like I remember when I met her. I was like
Speaker 1: I remember when I have both of you, like it's
Speaker 1: a romance novel, but I can tell you each at
Speaker 1: what you were wearing. But it was just like this
Speaker 1: like moment of like, oh my gosh, they must be
Speaker 1: so put together. They have remember meeting Laney and I
Speaker 1: never I tried to tell her the story other day
Speaker 1: and it sounded not good, sounds not complimentary because that
Speaker 1: good and so was like I thought you were so
Speaker 1: put together, and then I found out that nice really
Speaker 1: know you. You almost served me expired pumping God is dressing. No,
Speaker 1: it's just like you just have these like we hold
Speaker 1: people to. He's like and even in my own home,
Speaker 1: I need the same thing. My husband's human. He's a superstar.
Speaker 1: He goes out there and does unhuman things to me
Speaker 1: all the time. He's unhuman because he doesn't unhuman things too.
Speaker 1: I'm just kinda got a baby to bruce um. He
Speaker 1: you know, it's like he's every single night he's out
Speaker 1: there no matter. I mean, guys, let's talk about postpartum
Speaker 1: for five seconds when I get hold on the topic altogether.
Speaker 1: But just in the fights that we would have, and
Speaker 1: then his superpower is that he can forget that he
Speaker 1: just got off the phone with his wife. Really postpartum.
Speaker 1: It was bad with love bug um, and he would
Speaker 1: just go on stage and for ninety minutes he was
Speaker 1: It's his superpower. I mean, he is relentless on the road.
Speaker 1: He's relentlessly chasing our first year of having a baby,
Speaker 1: he did two hundred sixty five shows. I mean, it's
Speaker 1: just relentless. But like he's still human too, Like I
Speaker 1: forget sometimes he's human and all of a sudden, when
Speaker 1: you have the human fying, since we're making that a thing,
Speaker 1: when he has a human fying ten and see, I'm
Speaker 1: like okay, yeah, like when he needs me, or when
Speaker 1: there's a dead rat in the car, or when Lenny
Speaker 1: Crowder's throwing puffs in my back seed for nine hours
Speaker 1: on the way to Roseberry Beach, which is like a
Speaker 1: five hours. But I think putting anyone on a pedestal,
Speaker 1: no matter who they are, even if it is your husband,
Speaker 1: who who, whoever, I don't I just don't think anyone
Speaker 1: can be on a pedestal because no one is on
Speaker 1: a pedestal. Like, if you put someone on a pedestal,
Speaker 1: that's a lot of pressure a for you to keep
Speaker 1: them on there, because if they let you down and
Speaker 1: they're on a pedestal, then what does that look like
Speaker 1: because they're on a pedestal. And then also they're humans,
Speaker 1: so it's like, how can we put anyone on a pedestal?
Speaker 1: You can't, and like the most genuine human beings, Like
Speaker 1: I met Mallory Irvin, who I know you're close with.
Speaker 1: I love Malory. She's the best, and it was the
Speaker 1: most like she just had this like light and christ
Speaker 1: like ability to just make me feel like the world
Speaker 1: disappeared when I met her. And she was so in
Speaker 1: and so sincere into a sweet and I'm like, I've
Speaker 1: really looked up to her. It's like how she's created
Speaker 1: this brand for herself and all these things in now
Speaker 1: she's like manifest like and this is just me watching.
Speaker 1: I taught her how to manifest. I gave her the
Speaker 1: book The Secret, and I was like, you need to
Speaker 1: do this because she was in a dark place. I
Speaker 1: gave her The Secret. She read that thing flipped her
Speaker 1: life around. I'm like, can you please teach me how
Speaker 1: to do this because you are insane. But it's like
Speaker 1: that's it's just like Okay, well here's someone who's will
Speaker 1: be more sincere in person like my whole point is
Speaker 1: it's it's a news feed and everyone says it's the
Speaker 1: highlight reel, and it's like, okay, but I don't dislike
Speaker 1: that it's the highlight reel either, because I don't want
Speaker 1: to share dark, horrible thoughts with everyone and to like
Speaker 1: be on the other side of it actually have something
Speaker 1: to contribute, Like am I gonna go in there and
Speaker 1: bash people or politics or whatever. It's like, what's the point,
Speaker 1: m that's her point. I struggled well, And also like
Speaker 1: I struggled that too, because like I don't like just
Speaker 1: putting up the highlight road like on Instagram, because I
Speaker 1: don't like just putting out pretty pictures and cute otfits
Speaker 1: at fun events with my cute, awesome husband who's doing
Speaker 1: awesome things. Like I love all that, but there is
Speaker 1: another side to it, so like it's really important to
Speaker 1: me to share real map, real things, no makeup, like,
Speaker 1: but really struggles I'm going through, like and I struggle
Speaker 1: with how to do that because I'll write like a
Speaker 1: really heartfelt post and then I'll have like massive anxiety
Speaker 1: about it, like vulnerable what is it? I think ben
Speaker 1: A Brown calls it like a vulnerable ability hangover or
Speaker 1: something like I'll have like this massive vulnerable hangover, like
Speaker 1: oh my god, I overshared. I like went so deep
Speaker 1: into my well and I just vomited all the stuff up.
Speaker 1: And then I'll go and delete the post the next day.
Speaker 1: But because it's not to be so these somewhere, that's
Speaker 1: what I think. I'm like, Okay, somebody who needed this
Speaker 1: got it when they needed it, and I'm not quite
Speaker 1: ready to keep it out there all the time because
Speaker 1: it makes me feel super exposed and naked. But I
Speaker 1: feel like that's so important to balance the highlight real
Speaker 1: reason and then just be done with it. You remember
Speaker 1: the day you called me, I was hanging Garland. You're like,
Speaker 1: the only reason I knew I published that blog about
Speaker 1: the loss of our baby. I put it. I felt
Speaker 1: so good that it finally loosened somewhere and I and
Speaker 1: I can't even talk about that because I can feel
Speaker 1: the tears coming, so I am. The next day, Janet
Speaker 1: Kramer posted it, who she has also in miscarriage. I'll
Speaker 1: never forget this. I'm not laughing because loss is funny.
Speaker 1: I'm laughing because I'm at my house hanging Garland and
Speaker 1: Laney calls me and I was like hi, and she's like,
Speaker 1: I just can't believe this, Kaby. She's like, I just
Speaker 1: don't believe it. She's like, it's just everywhere. And I
Speaker 1: was like, she's like and I was like, yeah, miscarriage unfortunately,
Speaker 1: you know, like I'm like kind of a one and
Speaker 1: three they say one or three, and she was like, no,
Speaker 1: you're blocked. It's everywhere and see little accent. And I
Speaker 1: was like, what are you talking about. She's like, everyone's
Speaker 1: picked it up. Are you not watching? And I'm like,
Speaker 1: I'm not watching anything. I'm hanging Garland. She was like,
Speaker 1: it's like people and E and all these and I
Speaker 1: was like, are you serious? And none of them had
Speaker 1: cited me as Preston brust wife, which was my whole goal,
Speaker 1: and that was just to be a woman not associated
Speaker 1: with country music, not that it just it wasn't a
Speaker 1: headline to me. It was a real life thing. And
Speaker 1: I just remember being like that was one of my
Speaker 1: That whole blog, all that whole chapter has completely shaped
Speaker 1: how I think about everything, because I just know when
Speaker 1: I did something for the heart of it, when I
Speaker 1: did it for the right reasons, when I put it
Speaker 1: where I needed to go along. It goes where it
Speaker 1: needs to go, and you don't worry about where it
Speaker 1: and you don't have to force it. That's another thing.
Speaker 1: You don't be like here wait oh yeah, don't force
Speaker 1: the pumpkins, like don't like, don't start, don't too soon.
Speaker 1: And that's my biggest thing too, is don't jump the gun.
Speaker 1: I always want to jump the gun because like I
Speaker 1: feel like in my heart, I always know exactly where
Speaker 1: I want to go, Like I know where I want
Speaker 1: my life. You've researched it. I've researched it. I know
Speaker 1: where I want to end up. I know the goals.
Speaker 1: I had my whole vision plan board planed out till
Speaker 1: I die, Like I got it all mapped out. And
Speaker 1: so I'm like, okay, let's just get to it. Let's
Speaker 1: just move along. Next, next up, Okay, let's mabe. We
Speaker 1: got a little little gown on money. There's twenty right couches.
Speaker 1: Don't don't rush the season. There's twenty right couches. And
Speaker 1: so it's like, sometimes you're innocent. And I even got
Speaker 1: a tattoo. This is what my tattoos about. You know this,
Speaker 1: But like my three little bards tattoo I got. I
Speaker 1: burned myself to the curlier um. This one. It's for Bob.
Speaker 1: I know, Bob Marley, Everything's gonna be all right, but
Speaker 1: for this. I got this to remind myself sometimes you're
Speaker 1: waiting on a wire because you're waiting because sometimes you
Speaker 1: have to wait in life, which is so weird that
Speaker 1: I got this tattoo because I go through these all
Speaker 1: the time. Sometimes you're waiting, preparing to fly and sore,
Speaker 1: and then sometimes you're crashing, and it's just like in
Speaker 1: the cycle repeat, So you're never always gonna be waiting,
Speaker 1: You're never always gonna be flying, and you're never always
Speaker 1: gonna be crashing. Of art, yes, but it's only two
Speaker 1: things I got French Market were pieces of art. One
Speaker 1: is on a rob once for one of my best.
Speaker 1: But it's like to me, I have to remind myself
Speaker 1: because I like to be in the soaring phase. That's
Speaker 1: what I like. These things have the best each stage,
Speaker 1: each bird has the best, one has relief, one has
Speaker 1: the best view, and sometimes it's great to rest. Like
Speaker 1: I'm in more of a resting waiting phase right now,
Speaker 1: and you have to enjoy that, because how wonderful to
Speaker 1: have time to replenish your well so then when you
Speaker 1: are flying and staring, you've got strength and energy to
Speaker 1: do it. Okay, let's see it. Okay, I'm not taking
Speaker 1: this out. This is once upon a time. So it's
Speaker 1: all broken and mess up sometimes like it's a fairy tale,
Speaker 1: and sometimes it's not that it's okay, I love that.
Speaker 1: So it's just reminding yourself of that, like, yeah, somebody
Speaker 1: sold that you go one is right, nong. This is
Speaker 1: brief and gratitude altogether. Grief, yeah, you know, and that's
Speaker 1: the maybe all the seasons, like you have to have
Speaker 1: all the seasons. Can we go out to this Instagram
Speaker 1: things some of like post or a post. I've've been
Speaker 1: thinking a lot about this too, just to post or
Speaker 1: not to post. Obviously there is this pressure where it
Speaker 1: comes from, I don't know, to post things or not
Speaker 1: postings and not. Instagram is just a part of our
Speaker 1: life and so society and culture and the way it is.
Speaker 1: It feels like it's not even like living. Sometimes I'm
Speaker 1: like living your lives with you, but I'm not. I know.
Speaker 1: Instagram is crazy, it's but do you think we get
Speaker 1: caught up in we have this responsibility because people are
Speaker 1: ourselves to be putting ourselves out there. No one's ever
Speaker 1: made us do that or told us we had to
Speaker 1: do that, or told us we don't have to do that.
Speaker 1: I think we do go until a life sometimes that
Speaker 1: like this has to be such an integral part of
Speaker 1: our life, like even to the point of I'm growing
Speaker 1: your brand or I have a business or whatever, Yes
Speaker 1: to some degree, but no, to some degree, like we
Speaker 1: we get to decide what it looks like. You know,
Speaker 1: we get to make the choices in it. There's the
Speaker 1: right or wrong way to do it. And it's like
Speaker 1: it just saysn't if you don't put us out there,
Speaker 1: don't if you do? Do you know? All right, we
Speaker 1: don't have to overthink it. I guess that's and we
Speaker 1: shouldn't do it. Going back to you, so that your
Speaker 1: block to we shouldn't do it unless it's truly coming
Speaker 1: from a place where we are connected to it. We're
Speaker 1: posting and feel like it's something we want to say
Speaker 1: and want to put out there. But just because you
Speaker 1: still feel it for me right now saying like I'm
Speaker 1: not going to a party, saying be tagged at a party,
Speaker 1: and I used to be that way. I used to
Speaker 1: want to be at all things, and I used to
Speaker 1: want to be invited to all the things, and now
Speaker 1: I'm like, I mean even with Preston, Like it's like,
Speaker 1: can you come to this Austin game, NF, I'll blaw
Speaker 1: a lot, And I'm like, I just have to be honest,
Speaker 1: like I would rather be home with my babies. This
Speaker 1: is your season there and you don't want to miss it.
Speaker 1: But I'm like, but it's it's so great, right because
Speaker 1: it's like I get to say I'd ruther be home
Speaker 1: with these people. Yeah, and that's my choice, and I like,
Speaker 1: and you feel and you feel confident that choice, and
Speaker 1: you don't feel not even sad or fomo fomo fair
Speaker 1: of missing out. I think everyone knows what that means.
Speaker 1: But something my husband in reduced me to Jomo, which
Speaker 1: is a joy of missing Joebo baby. Yes, Cory, you
Speaker 1: have Joemo and you you go, like the second you
Speaker 1: feel the pomo, you go, wait, what did I get
Speaker 1: to do instead of what's going on right now? I
Speaker 1: got love. I'm joining that, I got to have this conversation,
Speaker 1: I got to you know, hang out with my kid.
Speaker 1: There you go, I got to have twenty minutes of
Speaker 1: sell so much up whatever Joemo. I love that. I
Speaker 1: mean someone introduced it to him, so don't not give
Speaker 1: him all the cross it. It's not like joy cruttering. Yes,
Speaker 1: no shirts, training marks so where but I but I
Speaker 1: think the reason I'm wanting to have these podcasts the
Speaker 1: girlfriend confidentiality. We're confidential where what I don't know what
Speaker 1: this day is called? If you get the host of
Speaker 1: what did they called the host of? What the heck
Speaker 1: is this called? I don't know, that's about my life
Speaker 1: right now? What the heck am I doing right now?
Speaker 1: What the hell am I doing? That should be what
Speaker 1: I call this? What the hell am I talking about?
Speaker 1: We all feel that way, like that's just like we
Speaker 1: were earlier having before we started recording, having these conversations
Speaker 1: about like really deep things, and I'm like, no one
Speaker 1: is nailing it. I had a friend, No one is
Speaker 1: nailing it. Kim Rose, if you're listening, you have changed
Speaker 1: my life with one sentence. No one is nailing it,
Speaker 1: No one is ever namely, no one is ever nailing
Speaker 1: your mind me today, and I'll remind you tomorrow. We'll
Speaker 1: just keep passing it on because but That's why I
Speaker 1: want to have these because I haven't super uninspired lately
Speaker 1: with just anything. I'm just been kind of in a funk,
Speaker 1: just kind of like, you know, what is the point
Speaker 1: of any of this. I'm just not like fired up
Speaker 1: about anything right now, which is just a season. But
Speaker 1: to me, having real talk and being able to share that,
Speaker 1: especially with women out there, because I know a lot
Speaker 1: of women aren't as open as we are, you know,
Speaker 1: and I think a lot of women need to hear
Speaker 1: these kind of conversations just to realize that you are
Speaker 1: not crazy, You're not alone. Other people have dead rats
Speaker 1: in their cars, and it's okay that we go. If
Speaker 1: I've done my home hard next month, it's okay, it's
Speaker 1: gonna be totally okay. But like you said, no one
Speaker 1: is nailing it. And like, even if you look a
Speaker 1: picture perfect and even if you seem like you have
Speaker 1: it all together, who does nobody? Also? Who cares? Exactly?
Speaker 1: Who are we comparing ourselves to? Isn't the goal happiness?
Speaker 1: If you can find peace and happiness and Joe Mo
Speaker 1: with yourself, then who you're hearing, then you're nailing. Then
Speaker 1: you are nailing it. Nail Okay, don't start the season
Speaker 1: two are like, don't and there's pick any of the
Speaker 1: twenty catches. What was that one? Twit r right, all right,
Speaker 1: because you're gonna sit no matter what. And for me,
Speaker 1: I'm not going to kill my own mortuality even before
Speaker 1: it's born by like I don't know, eating something, or
Speaker 1: like I need you to not stress stressing for you
Speaker 1: and we're gonna that. I have stopped twitching before you
Speaker 1: got my eyes twitching more stress. Gosh, live in the moment.
Speaker 1: I've just to seem more like my daughter. And I
Speaker 1: just analyzed when in the cycle life cycle do you
Speaker 1: start adopting? When do you because at two and a half,
Speaker 1: she doesn't have the rules yet and I love it
Speaker 1: about her. She walked into show her Nashville yesterday with
Speaker 1: a fancy Nancy costume, a faux for red jacket and
Speaker 1: floral doc Harmon's like she owned the play. But when
Speaker 1: do we lose that? I don't know, but that's what
Speaker 1: I'm like, the best part of Parenthead to me right
Speaker 1: now is just like watching like when do you start
Speaker 1: to learn a rule that makes you not as comfortable?
Speaker 1: Like Laney and I had just talked about yesterday, how
Speaker 1: I kind of got I feel like a more basic
Speaker 1: version of myself, and I don't like that. Like I
Speaker 1: can write all these things and share these things, but
Speaker 1: the minute I go to choosen outfit, and fashion is
Speaker 1: one of my favorite things, I will pick something that's safer,
Speaker 1: dis because I like it and not today you wearing
Speaker 1: stripes and liver skin so liberating, But it is like
Speaker 1: when do you start carrying what everybody else thinks? But
Speaker 1: I think now we're in the undoing that. I think
Speaker 1: that's what happens now. So maybe like you keep it
Speaker 1: when you're young, you kind of lose it in those
Speaker 1: before many years, like when you got preteen and twenties
Speaker 1: and early thirties and all that, and who knows, it
Speaker 1: can go on for as long as you want. But
Speaker 1: for me, I feel a distinct season shifting and I
Speaker 1: think we're all there where it's like I am undoing that,
Speaker 1: like I'm moving in a new direction where it's like
Speaker 1: becoming more myself than ever. Because I don't be excited
Speaker 1: for our kids, yeah, because I don't want that kids
Speaker 1: are going to be different, Raising a better generation something
Speaker 1: I really believe is happening right now, and raising one
Speaker 1: just to be more free in themselves, not to put
Speaker 1: all these like society standards that you have to be
Speaker 1: something like growing up now, like I Michael and I
Speaker 1: have kids who are gay or gay or something that's
Speaker 1: not typically in the normal, I would be so happy.
Speaker 1: Whereas that those back in the day when our generation,
Speaker 1: that was a stressful topic. You know, if your kids
Speaker 1: not following protocol exactly a stressful top. But this at
Speaker 1: least in the community that we live, and I feel
Speaker 1: like we all are so open to all of it
Speaker 1: as well, as long as you love just lives their
Speaker 1: best life, no harm to anyone else, lives with integrity
Speaker 1: and love, and then you can just go ahead and
Speaker 1: stay in your line. But why do we need to
Speaker 1: get everyone boxed up? I would even think about that
Speaker 1: with religion, like why do we need to have everybody
Speaker 1: so boxed up? Why do we need to say you're
Speaker 1: in this box. Okay, we're safe because we're all in
Speaker 1: this box, or like in life, like we're in this box,
Speaker 1: so we're all boxed up and safe, so we can
Speaker 1: relax because we all agree. It's all good about the
Speaker 1: control and right choices. People like to have that because
Speaker 1: they thought they're in control. Yeah not, but it's like,
Speaker 1: why do we need that control? And who was the
Speaker 1: first person that was the rulemaker that decided that that
Speaker 1: was the way it had to be. Because honestly, if
Speaker 1: you go back to the Bible, Jesus love and the
Speaker 1: first rule is love our neighbors, yourself, So it should
Speaker 1: stop right there, Like where do all the other rules
Speaker 1: come from? You know? Keep we could get a big
Speaker 1: old deal loud of the conversation, but all of follow
Speaker 1: me thing, there's sin, there's darkness, that's where all that story.
Speaker 1: But I just think if you look to find what
Speaker 1: you see in a person mostly depends on what you're
Speaker 1: looking for. And I think that we're just looking at
Speaker 1: and what's the crowds ride? What Listen? This is a
Speaker 1: prayer ever both of my kids every day before they
Speaker 1: walk into school, and I say, God, bless you and
Speaker 1: keep you, have fun and do your best, love yourself
Speaker 1: and love others. Way to teach self love, because that
Speaker 1: is very love. Was denied it or wasn't allowed to
Speaker 1: have it. I just it just wasn't a thing. It
Speaker 1: wasn't a thing to teach, It wasn't nurtured, it was
Speaker 1: I think we all have it, it's just how much
Speaker 1: was water that just wasn't part are equally important to me.
Speaker 1: Love yourself is number one because if you can't love yourself,
Speaker 1: how can you fully love anyone else. And I've had
Speaker 1: to like figure out how to self love because I
Speaker 1: even though I had great family, great opportunities, like, it's
Speaker 1: taking me a long time to get into being in
Speaker 1: love with myself. Matter how many people you love to
Speaker 1: still love, it end up empty. Mm hmm. True if
Speaker 1: you don't love yourself. And I think you can really
Speaker 1: only love yourself if you are connected to something bigger
Speaker 1: than yourself that you can trust that's calling the shots
Speaker 1: that you get to. Just listen to thee like a
Speaker 1: chosen daughter. I'm the daughter of a king, and that
Speaker 1: is priceless to me. That's every morning right now, it's on.
Speaker 1: I'm here, I'm the daughter of the king. I love that.
Speaker 1: And we're all meant to be here. It's a miracle
Speaker 1: that we're here on this earth. So let's live it
Speaker 1: up and have a good time and not get hung
Speaker 1: off on the two percent. It's sad and depressing. Let's
Speaker 1: live in our ninety eight percent. That's awesome. Don't get
Speaker 1: stuck in the rain cloud. Push his side and get
Speaker 1: back to the sunshine. Learn what you need to take
Speaker 1: from the rain. But let him water your land. But
Speaker 1: don't stay there, don't live there, don't park your don'taking camp.
Speaker 1: Face that dang cloud around, don't follow it. Yeah, don't
Speaker 1: give your cameras start following it, thinking that you've got
Speaker 1: to stay connect to our storm chaser. And that's your pression.
Speaker 1: They're just talking literally, not okay, Well should we wrap up?
Speaker 1: Let's leave your light. Always do that, so leave your life,
Speaker 1: leave some inspiration. Although this whole thing's inspiration, like one
Speaker 1: little nugget. I'm leaving this nugget which also tell my
Speaker 1: children every day and myself. The Lord did not give
Speaker 1: you a spirit of fear, but of power, of love
Speaker 1: and a sound mind. Now I haven't in my kitchen,
Speaker 1: thank to you, Thanks to you, And I don't remember
Speaker 1: life BC before cradder, So glad I'm sure it was
Speaker 1: not all. There is no life, that's right. Um. I
Speaker 1: will say that if your heart, spirit, mind is a
Speaker 1: lot something that you need to say, and you say
Speaker 1: it for all over your reasons, then you should say it,
Speaker 1: because I promise whatever you're saying no matter the stage,
Speaker 1: you don't have to be nameling. It doesn't have to
Speaker 1: be perfected, and you don't have to be on the
Speaker 1: other side of it. Someone is met with those words
Speaker 1: and those thoughts exactly where they are today. I love
Speaker 1: that s And I'm gonna say self talk like you said,
Speaker 1: because that's the season, and then loving yourself first, not
Speaker 1: an egotistical way, but like truly valuing yourself, valuing your thoughts,
Speaker 1: your feelings, not being hard on yourself, you mean valuing,
Speaker 1: treating yourself with kindness and knowing that you are valuable
Speaker 1: and meant to be here. And so don't talk smack
Speaker 1: to yourself, even in my life with that word just
Speaker 1: now I'm writing it down, valuing even if you're upset
Speaker 1: with the way things are going or you're pissed at
Speaker 1: how things have shook out, find a way to love
Speaker 1: yourself through it, because it's it's just we shouldn't be
Speaker 1: hard on ourselves like that, We shouldn't be mean to ourselves,
Speaker 1: and that's why things self talk. So just love yourself
Speaker 1: no matter what's one through and nothing's terrible, you can
Speaker 1: always like redeem yourself from any situation. There's always something
Speaker 1: to be learned. There's always something to come from it.
Speaker 1: And so that's it. A lot of self love. I
Speaker 1: love you, guys, love you. Okay, girlfriend, keep confidential out out.
Speaker 1: But what the hell did I just say? Caroline, she's
Speaker 1: a queen of talking. He was sowing your man. She's
Speaker 1: on the inside. She got the scoop on the laws
Speaker 1: to w on the ones, the side. No one can
Speaker 1: do with Caroline, Carol, no one can