WEBVTT - Growing Up in a Famous Music Household 0:00:03.760 --> 0:00:08.000 She was my mother, my father, my confident like everything, 0:00:08.200 --> 0:00:10.920 and I kind of yes, want to follow on her footsteps, 0:00:11.000 --> 0:00:13.880 but I also want to be seen as me. When 0:00:13.920 --> 0:00:16.280 you have parents in the public eye, they can seem 0:00:16.320 --> 0:00:18.000 to think, oh, we know how to do this, we 0:00:18.040 --> 0:00:20.439 know exactly how we did it and what works. But 0:00:20.560 --> 0:00:22.520 what I want to do for me is not going 0:00:22.600 --> 0:00:26.200 to be that. I almost feel guilty to talk about 0:00:26.239 --> 0:00:29.360 it because you feel like, how could you complain about that. 0:00:29.760 --> 0:00:32.960 You come from this legacy, You come from this amazing family. 0:00:40.960 --> 0:00:44.320 Welcome to this week's episode of Chicks and Chill. Today, 0:00:44.320 --> 0:00:47.360 I'm excited to welcome too, amazing Cubans. We're going to 0:00:47.440 --> 0:00:50.640 talk about a few things, including what it's like growing 0:00:50.720 --> 0:00:54.600 up in a famous household. This is Chicks and Chill 0:01:01.080 --> 0:01:03.160 because most of you guys know my family is in 0:01:03.200 --> 0:01:05.759 the music industry. My grandpa had to music or has 0:01:05.840 --> 0:01:09.520 actually a record label. My mom was a singer and 0:01:09.560 --> 0:01:11.840 she still is. You know, she's not here with us physically, 0:01:11.920 --> 0:01:19.119 but seeing it and well, it was beautiful. But there 0:01:19.160 --> 0:01:20.560 was a lot of pressure, you guys, A lot of 0:01:20.560 --> 0:01:24.800 pressure because especially when I wanted to start singing. When 0:01:24.840 --> 0:01:30.640 I started singing, it was just NonStop comparison and very 0:01:30.720 --> 0:01:34.440 high expectations because all of my family sings. So anyways, 0:01:34.640 --> 0:01:40.319 there are beautiful things, but there was a lot of 0:01:40.319 --> 0:01:43.959 competition in my family growing up, and just all I 0:01:43.959 --> 0:01:46.600 could really think is a lot of pressure. And we're 0:01:46.600 --> 0:01:49.080 going to get more into that because one of my 0:01:49.120 --> 0:01:52.760 guests today she also grew up in a famous music household. 0:01:53.000 --> 0:01:55.760 Emily is Stefan, is an artist and co host of 0:01:55.960 --> 0:02:01.320 Michael podcast. In Our Own World. Welcome, Welcome, How are 0:02:01.320 --> 0:02:04.320 you Emily? Oh my goodness, I am great. I am 0:02:04.360 --> 0:02:08.600 sitting here with my incredible co captain Geminy Hernandez we 0:02:08.639 --> 0:02:11.680 do in Our Own World on Michael to the Podcast Network. 0:02:12.120 --> 0:02:15.359 I just want to say it is so incredible because 0:02:15.680 --> 0:02:19.040 it's difficult because even just talking about this subject feels 0:02:19.040 --> 0:02:20.840 like we should be at least for me, I don't 0:02:20.840 --> 0:02:22.760 want to speak for you. When I start to say, 0:02:22.800 --> 0:02:25.200 oh my god, the comparison, oh my god, and everybody 0:02:25.240 --> 0:02:28.359 this and that, I almost feel guilty to talk about 0:02:28.400 --> 0:02:31.519 it because you feel like, how could you complain about that? 0:02:31.919 --> 0:02:35.120 You come from this legacy, you come from this amazing family, 0:02:35.639 --> 0:02:40.200 but people are making you super insecure, treating you like 0:02:40.320 --> 0:02:44.080 a stepping stone to something larger making you feel lesser 0:02:44.120 --> 0:02:46.920 than And then you know what, I haven't found barely 0:02:46.960 --> 0:02:49.720 any people in my life to connect to that can 0:02:49.800 --> 0:02:54.120 understand that. Because just like you, when you sing, when 0:02:54.160 --> 0:02:57.440 you create art that comes from you, it comes from 0:02:57.480 --> 0:03:01.160 the legacy of your family, right, you should be proud 0:03:01.280 --> 0:03:03.080 that's within you, the same way that I am. But 0:03:03.200 --> 0:03:05.160 the moment that somebody says, oh, you don't sing as 0:03:05.160 --> 0:03:07.160 well as your mom, and you're not as pretty, and 0:03:07.280 --> 0:03:09.959 you're gay and this and whatever, then it's like going, 0:03:10.040 --> 0:03:12.960 your man, you know what I mean. So it's just 0:03:13.200 --> 0:03:16.040 very beautiful to validate this energy. And also it's not 0:03:16.080 --> 0:03:18.640 to take away from the fact that we're very blessed 0:03:18.680 --> 0:03:21.359 to come from this beautiful legacy, but we have our 0:03:21.400 --> 0:03:23.720 own obstacles to deal with. And I feel like it's 0:03:23.760 --> 0:03:27.720 a good thing for people to hear about. No thank you, Emily, 0:03:27.720 --> 0:03:29.480 and And that's something I wanted to talk about. It's 0:03:29.480 --> 0:03:31.480 a subject that I've been wanting to talk about for 0:03:31.480 --> 0:03:33.480 a while, but like you said, it's difficult to find 0:03:33.520 --> 0:03:35.880 people that are in our same position and willing to 0:03:35.920 --> 0:03:40.720 talk about it because it could come off we're not grateful, 0:03:41.080 --> 0:03:42.840 We should have no complaints, but it's just like, it's 0:03:42.840 --> 0:03:44.920 not that I'm complaining. This is just my experience, this 0:03:45.040 --> 0:03:46.960 is my truth, you know what I mean. And of 0:03:46.960 --> 0:03:50.280 course I don't want to ignore the amazing fact that 0:03:50.320 --> 0:03:53.160 we have a geminy here. How are you, my love? 0:03:53.240 --> 0:03:55.440 Tell us a little bit about you. Thank you know, 0:03:55.480 --> 0:03:57.720 I'm really happy to be here. You know. I get 0:03:57.720 --> 0:04:01.280 to know Emily in a very special way, obviously intimate way, 0:04:01.600 --> 0:04:03.600 the way that you know a partner that you've been 0:04:03.640 --> 0:04:06.600 with for a few years, like we've been, and I 0:04:06.680 --> 0:04:09.720 know what this subject means to her, even though I 0:04:09.760 --> 0:04:14.400 can't personally relate because it's not my experience. But it 0:04:14.520 --> 0:04:17.839 was a lesson to me being somebody on the outside 0:04:18.200 --> 0:04:20.960 who used to see celebrity in one way and of 0:04:21.000 --> 0:04:22.880 course critique it in one way. You don't know what 0:04:22.920 --> 0:04:26.080 you're talking about. You've never actually struggled. It was a 0:04:26.200 --> 0:04:30.640 humbling experience to realize that all of us, even the 0:04:30.680 --> 0:04:34.200 ones that you think are struggling the least, are struggling, 0:04:34.480 --> 0:04:37.760 and we have feelings and experiences that are just as 0:04:37.800 --> 0:04:40.400 valid as the next person. There's no need to feel 0:04:40.440 --> 0:04:44.159 that somebody can't have the space or the support to 0:04:44.160 --> 0:04:45.760 to speak about it. So I'm happy to be here 0:04:45.760 --> 0:04:48.920 with you, ladies as part of this journey. You listen. 0:04:48.960 --> 0:04:51.680 She gets a lot of heat too, because dating somebody 0:04:52.320 --> 0:04:55.680 that is affiliated with, you know, some kind of legacy 0:04:55.720 --> 0:04:58.760 and musical families not easy either. People hit her up 0:04:58.760 --> 0:05:02.719 all the time, going, you know, oh, you know, I 0:05:02.720 --> 0:05:07.920 haven't talked to you in eight years, but I bet 0:05:08.680 --> 0:05:11.000 keeping a real girl. Did you know, Emily that your 0:05:11.000 --> 0:05:14.080 mom was famous when you were growing up? Yeah, I mean, 0:05:14.520 --> 0:05:16.680 you know, I'm sure you get this a lot to Like. 0:05:16.760 --> 0:05:19.279 The one of the questions I've heard the most in 0:05:19.320 --> 0:05:21.560 my life, it's like, what is it like for your 0:05:21.600 --> 0:05:24.799 mom to be glorious? Stefan, I'm like, she's my mom. 0:05:25.720 --> 0:05:29.799 I'm like, that's it, Like my mom is glorious, Stefan. 0:05:29.839 --> 0:05:31.279 I don't know how else to explain that to you. 0:05:31.360 --> 0:05:34.320 It's not that my mom is glorious, Stephen, is that 0:05:34.320 --> 0:05:38.000 that is my mother? What is your mother? To you? 0:05:38.000 --> 0:05:39.760 You know, and to a lot of people in this life, 0:05:39.760 --> 0:05:42.320 granted if they don't have a relationship with their mom. Luckily, 0:05:42.920 --> 0:05:46.320 I'm so proud of the fact that we have an 0:05:46.360 --> 0:05:49.120 incredible relationship. We love each other a lot. It has 0:05:49.320 --> 0:05:52.720 its fault which we've even tried to talk about and 0:05:53.040 --> 0:05:56.080 not air out but show the world that every mother 0:05:56.120 --> 0:05:58.880 and daughter has their own dynamic. But the point is 0:05:58.880 --> 0:06:00.160 that at the end of the day, you love each 0:06:00.200 --> 0:06:02.120 other like hell, and we really do. I mean, I 0:06:02.120 --> 0:06:04.480 have her tattooed on my arm right now, you know, 0:06:04.600 --> 0:06:07.040 like she's one of the loves of my life, you know, 0:06:07.160 --> 0:06:10.240 as I know that I am of hers. And funnily enough, 0:06:10.640 --> 0:06:13.039 I think this is what makes it so special. She's 0:06:13.040 --> 0:06:15.800 not an artist first, she's not a musician first. She's 0:06:15.839 --> 0:06:19.680 a mom first. And that's why I'm such a fan 0:06:19.760 --> 0:06:23.640 of hers. That's why I've been able to, you know, 0:06:23.720 --> 0:06:26.320 try to be the musician that I am because at 0:06:26.360 --> 0:06:29.640 the forefront of it all, she was a mother. She 0:06:29.800 --> 0:06:33.240 was a mom, and that's a huge responsibility. That's the 0:06:33.240 --> 0:06:36.880 thing about fame, like, don't let it destroy who you 0:06:37.000 --> 0:06:40.480 are as a person. Integrated with who you are. Yeah, 0:06:41.560 --> 0:06:44.240 let it let you shine, don't let it destroy you, 0:06:44.400 --> 0:06:46.920 because I've seen that a lot. So you know my parents, 0:06:46.920 --> 0:06:49.520 I know, I blow a lot of smoke up there, 0:06:51.400 --> 0:06:55.200 but they deserve it, for real, because they really are 0:06:55.200 --> 0:06:58.560 incredible parents, even the moments when they're too overbearing and 0:06:58.600 --> 0:07:02.679 they're annoying me. It's never anywhere but from a place 0:07:02.720 --> 0:07:08.080 of love, and yeah, exactly, So that's beautiful. Yeah, I 0:07:08.120 --> 0:07:11.080 mean for me because I think my mom started getting 0:07:11.080 --> 0:07:13.600 famous when I was I want to say, ten years old. 0:07:14.000 --> 0:07:16.200 So at first I was like, what's happening? You know 0:07:16.240 --> 0:07:17.560 what I mean? I knew she had saying, but she 0:07:17.680 --> 0:07:20.720 didn't start taking it seriously until like I was ten, 0:07:21.080 --> 0:07:23.000 and I was like her number one fan. I don't 0:07:23.040 --> 0:07:24.840 know if you guys remember those folders that had, you know, 0:07:24.880 --> 0:07:29.360 the little space in the front, like with the clear front, 0:07:30.240 --> 0:07:32.000 and I would put my mom's picture there, and I'd 0:07:32.000 --> 0:07:34.400 walk around with my folder at school and they're like, 0:07:34.440 --> 0:07:36.400 who's that, and you know the kids at school, and 0:07:36.400 --> 0:07:37.960 I'd be like, oh, that's my mom. She's going to 0:07:38.040 --> 0:07:40.280 be famous one day, and they would laugh at me. 0:07:40.360 --> 0:07:42.320 They would laugh, and I was just like her number 0:07:42.320 --> 0:07:45.400 one fan. So I saw it all before my eyes 0:07:45.440 --> 0:07:48.200 as she just grew. The thing is the person that 0:07:48.240 --> 0:07:50.320 my mom was on stage, she was the same person 0:07:50.400 --> 0:07:52.880 off stage. And for her it was I'm a woman, 0:07:53.040 --> 0:07:55.120 I'm a mother before I am an artist. So I 0:07:55.160 --> 0:07:57.559 totally get that, and for me it was it doesn't 0:07:57.600 --> 0:08:00.720 matter who I am now that we can move to 0:08:00.760 --> 0:08:03.040 a better place and stuff like that. She was always 0:08:03.120 --> 0:08:06.200 very adamant about keeping all of us on track, and 0:08:06.400 --> 0:08:09.520 she was a very strict mother, and I'm so grateful 0:08:10.040 --> 0:08:12.400 and it's weird now, I guess. The other day, I 0:08:12.480 --> 0:08:15.040 was at a show and they were showing pictures of her, 0:08:15.320 --> 0:08:18.400 and I think that was one of the moments like 0:08:18.440 --> 0:08:20.760 I hadn't felt in a long time where I was like, dude, 0:08:20.880 --> 0:08:23.800 that's my mom. It tricked me out and I was 0:08:23.840 --> 0:08:26.560 just like, I started getting all, you know, emotional. I'm 0:08:26.600 --> 0:08:30.600 a cancer something very much so, so I was just like, 0:08:30.640 --> 0:08:32.559 oh my gosh, that's my mom. And it blew my 0:08:32.600 --> 0:08:34.200 mind for like a second. It's like it's not that 0:08:34.240 --> 0:08:37.200 I had forgotten, but I'm like, it's amazing. It's a 0:08:37.200 --> 0:08:39.760 beautiful thing. And I can't complain because I learned so 0:08:39.840 --> 0:08:43.200 much and she's left me in so many other women 0:08:43.360 --> 0:08:45.719 in the music industry a platform, you know, shout out 0:08:45.720 --> 0:08:48.160 to her, to my mother up and having and I 0:08:48.240 --> 0:08:50.760 just sometimes and I think this is something that I 0:08:50.840 --> 0:08:54.880 just realized very recently because of the outside world for 0:08:54.920 --> 0:08:58.720 so long, I'm like, Okay, she was my mother my father, 0:08:59.160 --> 0:09:02.920 my my confident like everything, and I kind of yes, 0:09:02.960 --> 0:09:04.839 want to follow in her footsteps, but I also want 0:09:04.840 --> 0:09:06.880 to be seen as me, you know what I mean, 0:09:06.920 --> 0:09:10.360 Like I want to be given the opportunity to like, hey, 0:09:10.400 --> 0:09:14.240 I'm not my mom, I'm me. You know, to your point, 0:09:14.600 --> 0:09:16.640 I have to give you credit where it's two. This 0:09:16.679 --> 0:09:18.599 is something that with me and my brother is a 0:09:18.640 --> 0:09:20.640 big deal because my mom broke her back, she had 0:09:20.679 --> 0:09:25.520 an accident, and my brothers in his forties and I'm 0:09:25.559 --> 0:09:28.840 and so in between us, he lived an entirely different 0:09:28.840 --> 0:09:31.680 experience with my mom. When he was born. My mom still, 0:09:32.080 --> 0:09:34.600 you know, hadn't exploded in her career and nobody knew 0:09:34.600 --> 0:09:37.080 who she was, etcetera. When I was born, she had 0:09:37.120 --> 0:09:39.240 broken her back, everybody knew who she was, and I 0:09:39.320 --> 0:09:42.520 was this miracle baby that just appeared out of nowhere, 0:09:42.800 --> 0:09:45.679 you know. Fifteen years after that, right, And not only that, 0:09:45.760 --> 0:09:48.480 I look exactly like her, well not exactly like her. 0:09:48.480 --> 0:09:50.439 I have my dad's biggest nose. Shout out Dad, and 0:09:50.520 --> 0:09:52.920 thank you so much, Yella, Yella Yellow Lebanon love you. 0:09:53.720 --> 0:09:56.079 But listen, I'm proud of my Arabic roots, but I'm 0:09:56.120 --> 0:09:58.400 not a hundred percent Couana, and there's some in there 0:09:58.440 --> 0:10:03.319 somewhere going on. But I was born already with this 0:10:03.520 --> 0:10:06.960 kind of like everybody treats me nice respect. Nobody would 0:10:07.040 --> 0:10:09.280 dare make a joke that, oh, your mom's gonna make it, 0:10:09.320 --> 0:10:11.440 Are you kidding me? They'd probably treat me nicer than 0:10:11.480 --> 0:10:14.400 they should just because they see my last name on 0:10:14.440 --> 0:10:16.520 a piece of paper, and that has been hard for 0:10:16.559 --> 0:10:18.880 me too. But I give my brother credit where his due, 0:10:18.920 --> 0:10:22.920 because that transitory period for a child has to be 0:10:23.000 --> 0:10:26.360 really complicated. And I know for a fact that I'm 0:10:26.360 --> 0:10:28.200 sure that your mom up in heaven right now is 0:10:28.240 --> 0:10:30.880 thanking you for being her confident and her supporter. Because 0:10:31.240 --> 0:10:33.840 where we are coming from, where we all come from 0:10:33.840 --> 0:10:36.240 so many different parts of the world, people don't uplift 0:10:36.280 --> 0:10:39.439 and support us. They try to bury us. So oftentimes 0:10:39.480 --> 0:10:43.160 your child being your supporter is so big. My mom, 0:10:43.200 --> 0:10:46.600 who has Grammys and she's in her sixties to this day, 0:10:46.720 --> 0:10:48.679 if I tell her, oh, this sounds kind of weird, 0:10:48.800 --> 0:10:51.120 she probably wouldn't be able to sleep at night merely 0:10:51.160 --> 0:10:54.360 because of that bond between mother and daughter. So you 0:10:54.520 --> 0:10:57.640 probably just injected her with what she needed to get 0:10:57.679 --> 0:10:59.839 to where she needed to go, So it's a beautiful thing. You. 0:11:00.160 --> 0:11:01.760 I didn't do it. I just arrived, and it was 0:11:01.760 --> 0:11:05.800 all taking care of money. No, yeah, And she would 0:11:05.800 --> 0:11:08.360 say it a lot because we were so close in age, 0:11:08.520 --> 0:11:10.480 and I was the one taking care of the kids 0:11:10.480 --> 0:11:13.080 and the household and everything, and it was difficult, but 0:11:13.160 --> 0:11:21.400 I am so grateful the way I was raised. A 0:11:21.440 --> 0:11:23.800 couple of weeks ago, I was doing a podcast with 0:11:23.880 --> 0:11:28.719 a medium and he told me that subconsciously I was 0:11:28.880 --> 0:11:35.240 holding resentment. And I started thinking about that, and I thought, damn, 0:11:36.160 --> 0:11:38.160 I guess in a way I have. I mean, obviously 0:11:38.200 --> 0:11:40.840 I love my mother. I have so much more compassion 0:11:40.920 --> 0:11:44.360 for her now because I can see and I can feel, 0:11:44.400 --> 0:11:46.320 and I can experience what she had gone through in 0:11:46.320 --> 0:11:49.120 her career. As we know, it's not easy for women 0:11:49.240 --> 0:11:52.319 in the music industry, especially in our genre. So I 0:11:52.360 --> 0:11:54.120 have so much compassion for her. But in a way, 0:11:54.280 --> 0:11:57.760 I guess I was kind of like holding some type 0:11:57.760 --> 0:12:00.480 of resentment of like, dude, I respect do you as 0:12:00.520 --> 0:12:02.520 an artist for who you are and what you did, 0:12:02.559 --> 0:12:05.760 and I'm so like as a daughter and everything. But 0:12:05.840 --> 0:12:08.440 it's been so much harder I feel when it's not 0:12:08.520 --> 0:12:11.120 me complaining. I don't want to sound like I'm complaining, guys, 0:12:11.120 --> 0:12:14.720 because the truth is it's also had its perks, but 0:12:14.840 --> 0:12:17.960 it has been Why don't you want to complain? We 0:12:18.000 --> 0:12:22.320 feel you feel what it's like, you feel guilty. That's 0:12:22.360 --> 0:12:24.559 not fair to you, though, because when I want to 0:12:24.559 --> 0:12:26.760 bitch about my mom, I just bitch about my mom. 0:12:27.400 --> 0:12:30.240 I don't ask for permission like this is your because 0:12:30.240 --> 0:12:35.200 my mom's fans, girl are hardcore. I don't mean like that. 0:12:36.120 --> 0:12:39.120 I don't mean you have a right to talk about 0:12:39.160 --> 0:12:42.199 your experience. And thank you. We all, I think grow 0:12:42.320 --> 0:12:44.600 up to be more compassionate towards our mothers. I know 0:12:44.679 --> 0:12:47.000 that's my experience, you know, because my mom was also 0:12:47.040 --> 0:12:50.800 a single mom. Not five kids, that's wow, like kudos 0:12:50.800 --> 0:12:53.400 to your mom, but she was two kids and also 0:12:53.600 --> 0:12:56.080 starting her career. So and we were also very close 0:12:56.120 --> 0:12:57.720 to age. My mom had to me when she was eighteen. 0:12:58.160 --> 0:13:00.640 So I really feel that. I feel like, you know, 0:13:01.240 --> 0:13:03.440 I had like some and I'm probably so working through 0:13:03.440 --> 0:13:06.920 it unidentified resentment towards my mom because of my own things, 0:13:07.080 --> 0:13:10.679 and it's okay, right, yeah, that's so. I was like, 0:13:10.720 --> 0:13:13.480 I'm gonna be honest about it. This is how I feel, 0:13:13.559 --> 0:13:16.200 and and sometimes it's not necessarily been with her. It's 0:13:16.280 --> 0:13:19.320 other people's opinions and their criticism and judgment, and it's 0:13:19.320 --> 0:13:21.480 just like, dude, let me live my life, let me 0:13:21.520 --> 0:13:24.240 be me, let me figure it out. But I've also 0:13:24.320 --> 0:13:26.120 learned that it's a part of this. Did you ever 0:13:26.160 --> 0:13:28.680 feel that type of pressure, Emily, like, especially when you 0:13:28.679 --> 0:13:32.320 started singing, like I didn't sing. I tried to run 0:13:32.360 --> 0:13:34.000 the hell away from it. It It was the last thing 0:13:34.000 --> 0:13:36.560 I wanted to do because in my case, like my 0:13:36.640 --> 0:13:39.000 parents wanted to sing. Sing, that's all you want to do. 0:13:39.040 --> 0:13:40.760 I know your musical, I know you're this, You're that. 0:13:41.120 --> 0:13:43.120 She had me playing guitar on stage with her, and 0:13:43.120 --> 0:13:44.880 I couldn't even look up at the crowd because I 0:13:44.880 --> 0:13:47.840 wanted to vomit. And I would feel like, you know, 0:13:47.880 --> 0:13:50.040 I want to do this, but also they're pushing me. 0:13:50.120 --> 0:13:53.120 But also sometimes you need to push but also back off. 0:13:53.800 --> 0:13:58.200 It's so complicated, and also I don't know. Sometimes when 0:13:58.280 --> 0:14:00.800 you have parents in the public eye, it can seem 0:14:00.840 --> 0:14:02.920 to think, oh, you know, we know how to do this, 0:14:03.000 --> 0:14:05.320 we know exactly how we did it and what works, 0:14:05.440 --> 0:14:09.640 which absolutely what they did for them works. I would 0:14:09.679 --> 0:14:11.920 never take it away, but what I want to do 0:14:12.000 --> 0:14:14.400 for me is not going to be that. And so 0:14:14.480 --> 0:14:17.040 sometimes there's that line of like, well, what do you 0:14:17.080 --> 0:14:19.560 guys think is best? And what do I think is best? 0:14:19.600 --> 0:14:23.280 Because that's where the true gold is. When our parents 0:14:23.280 --> 0:14:26.360 were doing what they were doing, if they fell on 0:14:26.400 --> 0:14:29.120 their face, they had to answer for themselves, and there's 0:14:29.200 --> 0:14:31.880 value in that. You learn from that. If I fall 0:14:32.000 --> 0:14:34.120 on my face and my mom my dad there picked 0:14:34.120 --> 0:14:37.400 me up with tongs, no, I'm not gonna learn anything. 0:14:37.960 --> 0:14:40.320 So it's also about saying, look, this is my decision. 0:14:40.400 --> 0:14:43.520 I hear you. However, let me follow my face. Like 0:14:43.760 --> 0:14:45.840 everybody needs a broken nose once in a while. Like 0:14:45.840 --> 0:14:50.000 I mentioned, it's big enough already, but I'm serious. Sometimes 0:14:50.080 --> 0:14:53.320 if you love someone, you have to kind of like 0:14:53.400 --> 0:14:55.680 let them fall and like let them do their thing. 0:14:55.880 --> 0:14:58.360 And I mean that in the public sense and in 0:14:58.400 --> 0:15:01.760 the family sense. How we're in the public eye now 0:15:01.760 --> 0:15:05.120 we have this screen and this division where you hide 0:15:05.160 --> 0:15:07.280 behind who you really are. So it's very easy to 0:15:07.360 --> 0:15:10.800 slander and judge, and honestly, a lot of that is insecurity, 0:15:10.840 --> 0:15:13.960 but it does hurt. You can't pretend like it doesn't 0:15:14.480 --> 0:15:16.040 the same way that Jem said, Oh why do you 0:15:16.080 --> 0:15:18.880 feel bad about it? And everybody's like, oh, so what 0:15:19.120 --> 0:15:21.800 somebody tells you one bad thing online? I guarantee you 0:15:21.800 --> 0:15:24.160 you know, if somebody says something really atrocious to you, 0:15:24.720 --> 0:15:27.360 that energy enters you and you have to try our 0:15:27.400 --> 0:15:30.880 practice at least to divert it. But your parents also, 0:15:31.000 --> 0:15:33.200 you know, their moment of celebrity was in a very 0:15:33.200 --> 0:15:36.320 different time. You could choose and pick what you listen to, 0:15:36.400 --> 0:15:39.800 what interview, from what small publication or small amount of 0:15:39.840 --> 0:15:43.760 publications you read. Now, you guys are exposed to thousands 0:15:43.800 --> 0:15:46.960 of opinions at a moment's notice, whether you want it 0:15:47.080 --> 0:15:49.680 or not. And people are cruel when they can hide 0:15:49.680 --> 0:15:52.520 behind a screen and a photo or an alternate name. 0:15:52.720 --> 0:15:54.680 So I I have a lot of respect. I have 0:15:54.720 --> 0:15:56.680 a lot of respect for you all, really I do. 0:15:57.320 --> 0:15:58.680 I have a learned a lot of respect for you 0:15:58.880 --> 0:16:04.280 for dating me. So so your parents definitely did support 0:16:04.320 --> 0:16:07.200 you then in like your music. In my music, yeah, 0:16:07.400 --> 0:16:10.440 I didn't want to be a musician. I played basketball, 0:16:10.480 --> 0:16:13.640 but you know my five two stature I was too 0:16:13.680 --> 0:16:16.240 tall for everybody else, so they didn't let me play. 0:16:16.560 --> 0:16:18.560 And then I wanted to be a doctor. What the 0:16:18.560 --> 0:16:21.040 hell was I thinking? Girl, I would not have lasted 0:16:21.960 --> 0:16:24.480 and I have really shaky hands for but anyway, which 0:16:24.480 --> 0:16:27.160 is funny because I play instruments. I guess it works 0:16:27.480 --> 0:16:32.320 because that gives me my edge. But yeah, like in 0:16:32.600 --> 0:16:34.640 our last podcast, like I told my mom, she asked me, 0:16:34.760 --> 0:16:36.360 She's like, do you ever feel like I pressured you? 0:16:37.160 --> 0:16:42.800 And I was like, yes, However, sometimes pressure makes a diamond. 0:16:42.920 --> 0:16:45.680 So as long as you can talk about it and 0:16:45.720 --> 0:16:49.960 like acknowledge each other's feelings and learn each other's boundaries, 0:16:50.360 --> 0:16:53.320 you know, then yeah, hell, yeah, I don't regret anything. 0:16:53.560 --> 0:16:56.640 You know, I'm singing, I'm creating. It's awesome. There's nothing 0:16:56.640 --> 0:16:59.000 else I can ask for. That's awesome. That's awesome. Yeah. 0:16:59.000 --> 0:17:01.280 I think my mom was just when I told her 0:17:01.320 --> 0:17:03.840 I wanted to sing, she was more like, Okay, I 0:17:03.880 --> 0:17:07.720 want to manage you because there are so many sharks 0:17:07.720 --> 0:17:10.040 out there, you know what I mean, And it's hard, 0:17:10.160 --> 0:17:12.520 it's hard for women. And she did, what did you 0:17:12.560 --> 0:17:15.959 think of your talent? She heard me sing once or twice, 0:17:16.440 --> 0:17:19.880 I think, so she didn't really like, I know if 0:17:19.920 --> 0:17:21.720 I knew how to sing or not, But for her 0:17:21.760 --> 0:17:24.000 it was you just go to classes and you'll figure 0:17:24.000 --> 0:17:25.919 it out, you know what I mean. For me, a 0:17:25.960 --> 0:17:28.680 part of this process is that even though I felt 0:17:28.720 --> 0:17:31.159 pushed by my mother, I felt like the core of 0:17:31.160 --> 0:17:33.879 what she was doing was led by emotions, you know. 0:17:34.760 --> 0:17:39.040 And I'm sorry if you never felt that excitement of 0:17:39.080 --> 0:17:42.840 the joy of music, of talent from your mom, because 0:17:42.960 --> 0:17:45.840 that gift that you have. You know, I've heard your stuff, 0:17:45.880 --> 0:17:48.240 I know what you do and it's awesome, and so 0:17:48.440 --> 0:17:51.000 that not that she invalidated it in any way, That's 0:17:51.000 --> 0:17:53.480 not what I'm saying. But if you didn't have enough 0:17:53.520 --> 0:17:55.840 time to share with her your gift, that would probably 0:17:55.880 --> 0:17:58.000 be painful to me because the first people I send 0:17:58.040 --> 0:18:00.320 my stuff too is my girlfriend and my mom. So 0:18:00.640 --> 0:18:04.000 you know, I'm sorry to hear that thank you for 0:18:04.040 --> 0:18:05.359 me that That's one thing I'm like, how am I 0:18:05.400 --> 0:18:07.639 going to do this with without her being here? Because 0:18:07.760 --> 0:18:10.080 she knew about it, and the idea was we were 0:18:10.119 --> 0:18:13.119 going to have a band of all women. I was 0:18:13.160 --> 0:18:16.000 going to be the singer. I wanted something like Selena 0:18:16.200 --> 0:18:17.800 like you know that that I just had this whole 0:18:17.800 --> 0:18:19.520 idea and she says, okay, we'll get there. You know, 0:18:19.640 --> 0:18:21.480 I'll manage you this is not the career that I 0:18:21.520 --> 0:18:23.959 want for you. It is very difficult, but I'll support you. 0:18:24.040 --> 0:18:26.040 I'll support you if that's what you want. Obviously, you 0:18:26.080 --> 0:18:27.840 know what happened. Happened, and I said, I don't want 0:18:27.840 --> 0:18:29.920 to live with the what if. But it was very 0:18:29.960 --> 0:18:32.080 hard because I'm like, I wonder if my mom would 0:18:32.080 --> 0:18:35.479 like it. I wonder how she would react, you know. 0:18:35.560 --> 0:18:37.399 But till this day, I go on stage and I'm like, 0:18:37.440 --> 0:18:39.320 Mom helped me, and I swear to you, I feel 0:18:39.320 --> 0:18:42.200 like she does, you know. I feel like she sometimes, yeah, 0:18:42.280 --> 0:18:44.720 walks me through it, you know. But I didn't want 0:18:44.720 --> 0:18:47.920 to live with what if because of fear. I didn't 0:18:47.920 --> 0:18:50.159 do it because of fear. And that's awesome. That's awesome 0:18:50.200 --> 0:18:52.320 that that you have a great relationship with your mother, 0:18:52.400 --> 0:18:55.280 with your parents, and that you have their support. That's beautiful. 0:18:55.320 --> 0:18:56.760 And I feel like I do. I feel like I 0:18:56.760 --> 0:18:58.919 honestly feel in my heart I have her support. But 0:18:58.960 --> 0:19:01.720 I do wish she would have heard my stuff. You know, 0:19:02.880 --> 0:19:07.080 she's listening from whoever she is definitely absolutely thank you 0:19:07.119 --> 0:19:09.440 so much. How do you feel now? Do you feel 0:19:09.480 --> 0:19:11.720 like you're compared a lot to your mom in any way? 0:19:11.760 --> 0:19:14.120 Like for sure, I used to bother the hell out 0:19:14.119 --> 0:19:16.399 of me, but now I'm like, yeah, like people be like, 0:19:16.440 --> 0:19:18.560 oh my god, your voices sounds so like like my 0:19:18.600 --> 0:19:23.200 mom and my nephew who's ten and I are doing 0:19:23.240 --> 0:19:26.240 a Christmas album right now. It's coming out this Christmas 0:19:26.600 --> 0:19:29.400 and he's ten years old and he started singing recently. 0:19:29.440 --> 0:19:31.159 And there are parts of the record where I'm like, 0:19:31.200 --> 0:19:34.600 who the hell is who I cannot tell? And at 0:19:34.600 --> 0:19:37.720 first that would bother me. I would be like, oh god, 0:19:37.800 --> 0:19:40.000 stop comparing me. I have my own sound. But you 0:19:40.000 --> 0:19:43.679 know what people will say, like wow, what a family resemblance. 0:19:43.720 --> 0:19:46.000 But also you have your own thing, and like, as 0:19:46.080 --> 0:19:47.800 long as you have a talent and you love what 0:19:47.840 --> 0:19:50.960 you do, who cares who hears it in what way? 0:19:51.560 --> 0:19:53.520 Like is that really going to stop you from doing 0:19:53.520 --> 0:19:55.400 what you want to do? You sound like your mom? Awesome, 0:19:55.480 --> 0:19:58.200 She's an incredible singer who has Grammy's in a great career. 0:19:58.320 --> 0:20:00.280 You think I sound like her? Wow? Okay? Cool? Like 0:20:00.840 --> 0:20:03.040