Speaker 1: When you are at war, you commit great sins. What
Speaker 1: does God think about me since I've committed these sins?
Speaker 1: Welcome to the podcast. Special guest Bernie is back. It's
Speaker 1: in fact, you're not even special anymore. We're just normal,
Speaker 1: the non special uh normal normal guest Bernie. And you
Speaker 1: were on a few weeks ago and you were you
Speaker 1: just finished or you were just about to go on
Speaker 1: this run, and then everyone was worried about you, thinking
Speaker 1: you might die, and so they were emailing like how's Bernie?
Speaker 1: And then people are talking to me at meet and
Speaker 1: greets like how's Bernie? Haven't heard anything? So can you
Speaker 1: give a little recap?
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I'll give a brief little recap and you
Speaker 2: can follow us on Instagram. It's at Burn and Coco
Speaker 2: and then well we have a lot of stuff from
Speaker 2: the race on there, and we're actually going to start
Speaker 2: doing these little segments called Coffee with Burn where it's
Speaker 2: me just kind of talking about the things I call
Speaker 2: you and talk about like these little nuggets that I
Speaker 2: find in the woods that are like, oh man, I
Speaker 2: wonder if the world needs that. So yeah, I go
Speaker 2: follow us there and keep up. But oh man, there's
Speaker 2: so much I did make it. I ran a good
Speaker 2: race preparation for.
Speaker 1: The people that don't know how far was it.
Speaker 2: So it was thirty four miles, there was over five
Speaker 2: thousand feet of elevation. It was on a single track,
Speaker 2: you know, trail run in Cleeborn, Texas. It was awesome.
Speaker 2: It was really awesome. I went in with a good
Speaker 2: kind of race plan, and my plan was stay humble,
Speaker 2: don't go out too fast, and try to finish strong.
Speaker 2: And I think that, especially this being the first ultra
Speaker 2: of this link that I've done, there's always and maybe
Speaker 2: this is true for life in general, but there's always
Speaker 2: a tendency to just go out too fast, and when
Speaker 2: you get into an ultra marathon, just can't do that.
Speaker 2: You're gonna burn out, you're gonna blow up, your muscles
Speaker 2: are gonna crash, and you're gonna have to DNF and
Speaker 2: not finish the race. And so, man, it took everything
Speaker 2: in me those first you know, twenty or fifteen, sixteen
Speaker 2: miles to just let people pass me and just kind
Speaker 2: of find my pace and be like, okay, this is it.
Speaker 1: Set the ego aside.
Speaker 2: Set the ego aside, And oddly enough, I didn't put
Speaker 2: this together until I was actually on the trail, but
Speaker 2: months earlier. You know that I take like a verse
Speaker 2: and I'll just like rest on that verse for like
Speaker 2: a month or two. Well, I was on Isaiah forty
Speaker 2: thirty one. But those who wait upon the Lord will
Speaker 2: renew their strength. They will rise up on wings like eagles.
Speaker 2: They will run and not grow weary, they will walk
Speaker 2: and not grow tired. And I had been on that,
Speaker 2: so I got on the trail and all of a sudden,
Speaker 2: all I heard was that verse over and over. Just wait,
Speaker 2: just wait on the Lord, he will renew your strength.
Speaker 2: And you know, for whatever reason, I got to about
Speaker 2: mile twenty six and some I mean, I can't explain it,
Speaker 2: like it was euphoric. I felt like I was running
Speaker 2: the first mile, and I ran that last eight and
Speaker 2: a half miles fifteen minutes faster than the previous eight
Speaker 2: and a half miles. It was like some of the
Speaker 2: fastest of the race. And so there was this constant
Speaker 2: like just stay humble. My mind is telling me, dude,
Speaker 2: you need to push. You got more in the tank,
Speaker 2: keep going, but it was like no, just wait, just wait.
Speaker 2: And then I felt like the time came and I
Speaker 2: pushed and I finished strong, and it was a really
Speaker 2: great experience. It likely, Lord Willing, won't be the last
Speaker 2: one that I do.
Speaker 1: And yeah, I just.
Speaker 2: Had a blast.
Speaker 1: So first meal you had when you finished, first meal
Speaker 1: was what a burger order?
Speaker 2: It was a huge like, uh, what's the spicy, sweet
Speaker 2: and spicy double cheeseburger, French fries.
Speaker 1: A milkshake.
Speaker 2: No, I don't think I did a milkshake. I could
Speaker 2: have done a milkshake, but I ate so much for
Speaker 2: the next week, like I kind of said, you know what,
Speaker 2: just let let yourself go a little bit, you you know,
Speaker 2: kind of pushed her in training. So I ate what
Speaker 2: I wanted. I drank what I wanted, I slept in,
Speaker 2: I didn't I didn't really exercise. I did like a
Speaker 2: few three mile runs just to kind of like shake
Speaker 2: out the muscles. But yeah, it was. It was a
Speaker 2: good burger. I'll tell you that, I'm bad. I had
Speaker 2: earned it.
Speaker 1: Bernie over here, David Goggins, Now.
Speaker 2: No, not even close. But I appreciate the support, guys.
Speaker 1: It was.
Speaker 2: It was really cool fun to hear from you.
Speaker 1: Guys. Everyone was because you literally did this podcast a
Speaker 1: few weeks ago and then went and did that run,
Speaker 1: and then I came back and did a solo podcast
Speaker 1: the next week and they were like, oh, how's how's Bernie.
Speaker 1: I'm glad get the recap and I think some of
Speaker 1: the knowledge that you learned on that run will come
Speaker 1: out in the question today. I'm positive they will at
Speaker 1: some point. And that's what we do on this podcast
Speaker 1: is answer your questions, and you could email your questions
Speaker 1: to Grangersmith podcast at gmail dot com. If we don't
Speaker 1: have anything in front of us, we're just going to
Speaker 1: talk it through like we're just friends. Okay, I'm going
Speaker 1: to randomly go through these in the first one with
Speaker 1: the subject line of this one questioning God's plan, Hey Grandeer,
Speaker 1: my name is Toner. That's the last name I'll go by.
Speaker 1: I'll be thirty five in September and I've never had
Speaker 1: a serious relationship. All my friends are getting married and
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm just left on the sidelines. Everyone
Speaker 1: asked all the time, when am I going to be next?
Speaker 1: I have a fear that God doesn't have anyone planned
Speaker 1: for me and that I should be forever alone. I've
Speaker 1: been on several dates, but it was with the wrong girl.
Speaker 1: Am I supposed to pray for God to give me
Speaker 1: patience or just trust he has a plan for me.
Speaker 1: I've recently felt a calling back into student ministry, and
Speaker 1: it's been fun helping out youth as a youth pastor
Speaker 1: by being a positive influence and sharing my testimony because
Speaker 1: a lot of stuff I went through there. This is
Speaker 1: this is now on a deeper level. I also have
Speaker 1: tickets to your show in Tulsa, Okay, Toner, Let's focus
Speaker 1: on that first part. Thirty five years old and single.
Speaker 1: This is what's interesting, Bernie. This is what he says,
Speaker 1: like there's always a line in one of these questions
Speaker 1: after by the way, one hundred and ninety, that's the
Speaker 1: episode one hundred and ninety. Oh, so after one hundred
Speaker 1: and ninety of these, there's always sentences that pop out
Speaker 1: to me. And you probably know which one I'm talking about.
Speaker 1: It's the one that says, I have a fear that
Speaker 1: God doesn't have anyone plan for me and that I
Speaker 1: should be forever alone. So let me just ask you
Speaker 1: back another question. If God has a plan for you,
Speaker 1: which here's your sentence, God doesn't have anyone plan for me?
Speaker 1: So if that is God's plan, would you reject his plan?
Speaker 1: Would you consciously revolt, rebel against his plan? It's an
Speaker 1: interesting thought. I'm not it's rhetorical, but this is us,
Speaker 1: you know, this is what we do. We go, we go.
Speaker 1: I trust God. I see this so many times in
Speaker 1: the questions. Somebody's typing a question right now as we speak,
Speaker 1: and it's saying, I trust God, but there's always a
Speaker 1: butt but but I don't know this or I'm fearful
Speaker 1: of this. So what do you say to this guy?
Speaker 1: Burns as he says, maybe I'm going to be single forever,
Speaker 1: forever alone and that's God's plan, and I fear that.
Speaker 2: Right first, I think it's I think it's okay. These
Speaker 2: what you're feeling is legitimate.
Speaker 1: You're human.
Speaker 2: We've talked before about these, these things of fear and faith,
Speaker 2: like it can sometimes it can be both. But I
Speaker 2: think Granger's hitting on this idea of contentment that he's
Speaker 2: talked about many, many times on the podcast. What if
Speaker 2: that is God's best for you is to live your
Speaker 2: life without a wife, without a partner, or whatever are you?
Speaker 2: Would you be content with that? I guess the other thing,
Speaker 2: the other question would be, like Granger said, or would
Speaker 2: you kind of rebel against that and not accept that
Speaker 2: and and ultimately that would come down to not trusting
Speaker 2: that he loves you and has your best at heart
Speaker 2: in his plan. I think that this is a place
Speaker 2: where Toner just has to kind of spend some time.
Speaker 2: And I think it's okay to wrestle. You read through
Speaker 2: the Psalms like David wrestled with God a lot about
Speaker 2: and question things, and so I think the best thing
Speaker 2: that you can do is kind of wrestle through this.
Speaker 2: If there is that desire, you know, continue to pray
Speaker 2: about it. But I think there's a bigger heart I
Speaker 2: don't want to say issue, but I think there's a
Speaker 2: bigger opportunity for you to understand your heart and the
Speaker 2: current position of your heart towards God through what you're
Speaker 2: feeling right now. So I would just press in, Yeah,
Speaker 2: I mean you're thirty five, like I want to say,
Speaker 2: you're still young, because you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he might have expected us to just go straight
Speaker 1: in and be like, no, you know, you'll find somebody,
Speaker 1: you're young, You're everything's gonna be okay. And so but
Speaker 1: before we do that, and we might we might agree
Speaker 1: to that, but before we say that we got to
Speaker 1: first just say, but would you be cool being part
Speaker 1: of God's plan? Period? Like nothing else after that? Would
Speaker 1: you be cool with that? It's like this, you know London,
Speaker 1: My daughter, she doesn't do good with dairy products, but
Speaker 1: she loves them. And so when me and Amber are saying, now,
Speaker 1: you can't have ice cream tonight. You can't because you're
Speaker 1: gonna wake up in the middle of night with a
Speaker 1: belly ache, and she's like, no, but I want ice cream.
Speaker 1: Am I never gonna have ice cream the rest of
Speaker 1: my life? And we're like, listen, we're talking about tonight,
Speaker 1: and you cannot have it tonight. This will affect you.
Speaker 1: You will wake up with the belly ache. And she
Speaker 1: doesn't remember that, and she can't see that. We say
Speaker 1: that because we love her, because we care about her,
Speaker 1: but she doesn't see it. She doesn't trust it, she's
Speaker 1: fearful of it. And it's the same thing. We do
Speaker 1: this with God all the time. It's interesting. Bernie brought
Speaker 1: up the psalms and David wrestling with God. I heard
Speaker 1: Tim Keller this morning saying in a book that he
Speaker 1: wrote that having doubt in you would be like having
Speaker 1: antibodies in you. It's like basically what he's saying is
Speaker 1: you don't you don't want to be someone that's that
Speaker 1: has zero doubt at all, zero fear, zero doubt, nothing,
Speaker 1: because that's like a body without antibodies. And you then
Speaker 1: are very open to an attack at some point because
Speaker 1: your whole belief system could come crashing down because what
Speaker 1: that small sliver of fear in you does, and I
Speaker 1: don't want to promote fear, but what it does in
Speaker 1: you is it makes you wrestle with it makes you
Speaker 1: attack it. It makes you dig and learn and read
Speaker 1: and think like Bernie going on this, you know, thirty
Speaker 1: mile run and he's thinking and he's wrestling with verses,
Speaker 1: and revelation comes through that wrestling. If you don't have that,
Speaker 1: if you're like, no, I'm pretty it's like spiritually I'm
Speaker 1: pretty perfect. Like you don't have I don't have anything
Speaker 1: that all the scripture just I'm on good with it all,
Speaker 1: then you're in a really dangerous place at that point.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and that's a great analogy. Those antibodies are what
Speaker 2: are killing the virus. Yeah, so there are these these
Speaker 2: untruths in your head, the wrestling, the antibodies, this this,
Speaker 2: this is actually what kills the things that are not true.
Speaker 2: So but here's here's the last thing I'll say to Toner.
Speaker 1: What if.
Speaker 2: You decided you made the choice God, I am all in,
Speaker 2: I'm I'm content in you, and maybe maybe I'm not
Speaker 2: right now, but give.
Speaker 1: Me that heart.
Speaker 2: And all of a sudden God started to speak to you.
Speaker 2: He started to reveal things to you, and you started
Speaker 2: to write those things down and you started to develop
Speaker 2: this heart that was so passionate for the gospel that
Speaker 2: He took you on these adventures that you never thought.
Speaker 2: That you published books that were best sellers, that you
Speaker 2: that people knew who you were because of this mission
Speaker 2: that you were solely focused on. But you were single.
Speaker 2: Much like Paul. This is the same story of Paul Right.
Speaker 2: He was solely focused on this message and it it
Speaker 2: took him to places and it brought things out of
Speaker 2: him that we still read and we still are inspired
Speaker 2: by today. Toner, what if that? What if that is
Speaker 2: your story? But you're too busy focused on suburban two
Speaker 2: and a half kids with my family just live in this,
Speaker 2: you know, typical American dream life that you're gonna miss out.
Speaker 1: He says, like everyone asks all the time when I'm
Speaker 1: gonna be next. No, stop that, stop listening to that,
Speaker 1: You're gonna miss out that you can't follow social media
Speaker 1: and listen to all these people. Bernie's right, Granger's right,
Speaker 1: All right, let's look to another one. Uh. This is
Speaker 1: interesting subject line savior complex. Hey Granger, my husband and
Speaker 1: I are a big fan of your podcast in the
Speaker 1: Smiths and recently went to your show in Louisville. I
Speaker 1: want to ask ask a question regarding my brother in law.
Speaker 1: He is a very kind hearted and selfless person and
Speaker 1: has been a Christian since he was a young kid.
Speaker 1: About nine years ago, he began a relationship with a
Speaker 1: woman who claimed to know Christ, but is very clearly
Speaker 1: not living a christ like life. She goes out to
Speaker 1: bars four to five days a week. She also spent
Speaker 1: a year in a rehab program from meth and alcohol.
Speaker 1: My brother in law has a savior complex and has
Speaker 1: paid for everything for her, all of her nights out
Speaker 1: to the bars, her rehab, and even some of her bills.
Speaker 1: She talks to other guys while out and has cheated
Speaker 1: on him multiple times. This is very She is very
Speaker 1: clearly using him, but is also very clearly controlling him.
Speaker 1: She gets angry at him for spending time with his
Speaker 1: family and we don't get to see him very much.
Speaker 1: What can we do as his brother and sister in
Speaker 1: law to help him get out of this situation? So
Speaker 1: thank you. This is Ashley. Thank you Ashley. This is
Speaker 1: similar Burns to a question that we got a few
Speaker 1: weeks ago about the son in law who was to say,
Speaker 1: some Satan worshipers. Yeah, right, yeah, And we could probably
Speaker 1: give a similar answer. In fact, the Gospel is going
Speaker 1: to always be the answer. And sometimes Bernie and I
Speaker 1: will say that very clearly, and we'll go straight to
Speaker 1: like the actual cross, and then sometimes we'll say it
Speaker 1: more metaphorically and what the implications of the cross mean?
Speaker 1: What am I talking about? Right? Let me get to
Speaker 1: the point. The only way that this that this woman
Speaker 1: is going to be healed is through the Gospel. The
Speaker 1: only way that your brother is a brother in law,
Speaker 1: brother in law is going to have his eyes opened
Speaker 1: to the world is through the Gospel. So what do
Speaker 1: you do? You speak the Gospel, you live the Gospel,
Speaker 1: and you love like the Gospel. You love as a
Speaker 1: person that has been redeemed a person you I'm speaking
Speaker 1: to you Ashley. You don't deserve Christ, you don't deserve Heaven.
Speaker 1: You don't deserve a relationship with God. You don't deserve
Speaker 1: to be worthy of any of that. Now, neither do I,
Speaker 1: neither does Bernie, neither does anybody. We were born rebels,
Speaker 1: we were born sinners, We were born not worthy of heaven.
Speaker 1: But God and his grace and his mercy sent his
Speaker 1: son to be a substitution for us, so that in
Speaker 1: him we are worthy. We are full of grace, we
Speaker 1: are full of hope. Right, that's the story of the Gospel.
Speaker 1: So you look at her and you skid. She's in
Speaker 1: rehab and she's tearing him down. She goes to bars
Speaker 1: four or five. I go, Yeah, you could do anything,
Speaker 1: including worshiping Satan. Like we heard a few weeks ago,
Speaker 1: you could do anything when you're outside of Christ. So
Speaker 1: what you do is you appropriately speak truth to them.
Speaker 1: That is your only answer. And now there's a thousand ways,
Speaker 1: a million ways to act that out, but that ultimately
Speaker 1: at the bottom of the foundation, that is your only
Speaker 1: answer is to do this in love.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's really good. I For some reason, I'm reminded
Speaker 2: of something that Tyler David at the Stone said this
Speaker 2: was probably a few months ago and it was just
Speaker 2: kind of the opening of his his sermon, and for
Speaker 2: some reason it's really stuck with me. And I think
Speaker 2: we talked briefly about the bridge, right, like, you know,
Speaker 2: we go we go to Sunday service, and we hear
Speaker 2: these these things about Jesus, and we about you know,
Speaker 2: propitiation and about you know, sanctification. We hear about Heaven.
Speaker 2: We hear about these very high and lofty things, and
Speaker 2: then we immediately we go to lunch. And it probably
Speaker 2: takes till Sunday evening or Monday that the very like
Speaker 2: earthy and real tangible, taking kids to soccer, to school,
Speaker 2: relationships with our brother in laws, like the these things
Speaker 2: start to kind of like they feel so separate, they
Speaker 2: feel so different. It's like this, this is eternal and
Speaker 2: lofty and this is like here and now, and I
Speaker 2: don't know how to go through this. And so what
Speaker 2: Grangeer and I have been talking about is, Okay, well,
Speaker 2: how do we how do we communicate a bridge? What
Speaker 2: is the thing that bridges this what can seem like
Speaker 2: a gap between these two. For some reason, I'm thinking
Speaker 2: about that with you, Ashley, and how do you take
Speaker 2: the things that Granger has said and bring them into
Speaker 2: just like the earthy humanness of relationship with the brother
Speaker 2: in law.
Speaker 1: One.
Speaker 2: I think you you could just start with praying. I
Speaker 2: don't know if you have prayed for this guy, have
Speaker 2: prayed for this relationship, prayed for her and prayed like, God,
Speaker 2: what do you want me to know about this? And God,
Speaker 2: what do you want me to do? Don't over complicate it.
Speaker 2: But I think when we can be humble enough to
Speaker 2: just kind of sit and wait on the Lord, like, God,
Speaker 2: what do you want me to do? Just practically and
Speaker 2: maybe it you know, like we want her and we
Speaker 2: want him to hear the gospel and for it to change.
Speaker 2: It's probably not going to happen outside of a relationship
Speaker 2: that is covered in grace and love and mercy. It's
Speaker 2: the same as our story. So if you can have
Speaker 2: that lofty eye idea in mind, but then bring it
Speaker 2: to something that's very Hey, do you want to come
Speaker 2: home for dinner and just have that dinner be so
Speaker 2: significant to them, for them to feel so provided for,
Speaker 2: for them to feel protected, that was a safe place. Hey,
Speaker 2: you want to do this next Sunday?
Speaker 1: Next Sunday, night.
Speaker 2: I guarantee you if you begin to just practically earthy
Speaker 2: hands and feet serve them and love them and show
Speaker 2: them grace and a safe place. In that way, it
Speaker 2: will provide the opportunity to either show them or to
Speaker 2: speak truth into their lives. But even if it doesn't,
Speaker 2: this is what the word calls us to do. I
Speaker 2: think we so often like, Okay, well, we got to
Speaker 2: do this in order to get this opportunity. It's like, no,
Speaker 2: God just calls us to do this part. Allow him
Speaker 2: to do the rest.
Speaker 1: He might.
Speaker 2: He might not move in any one of these people,
Speaker 2: but that's not our place. That's not what we do.
Speaker 2: That's not what we're called to do. Just be the
Speaker 2: hands and feet of his grace and allow him to
Speaker 2: do the rest, and and just rest in that.
Speaker 1: Ashley, let me tell you something that you might not know.
Speaker 1: Your brother in law knows that you hate his girlfriend.
Speaker 1: You might not realize that, but it's obvious in your
Speaker 1: email that this consumes you. He knows that. So what
Speaker 1: are you gonna do with that? What are you gonna
Speaker 1: do with the fact that she he knows you don't
Speaker 1: approve of this at all? And this has been almost
Speaker 1: a decade. Have you ever built him up? Like, have
Speaker 1: you ever been out with him and just been like,
Speaker 1: you are a good catch. You're such a I mean,
Speaker 1: you're handsome, you're smart, you you're really good at this, this, this,
Speaker 1: these talents you have, you're you're just you're just a
Speaker 1: good guy. Have you ever said that to him? Have
Speaker 1: you ever built him up? Or is it always she's
Speaker 1: doing this and she didn't the blah blah blah nine
Speaker 1: years of this mess that you've gone through. I wonder
Speaker 1: it's just questions I have. So what Bernie's saying is,
Speaker 1: how do you act that out? Can you act out
Speaker 1: out with love? Can you invite them over for dinner?
Speaker 1: Can you put aside all of this anger that you
Speaker 1: have for this relationship in general and this woman? Can
Speaker 1: you just stop it and see it looks like you've
Speaker 1: probably tried everything else you might consider trying love.
Speaker 2: Yeah, one last thing I'll add, And this is like
Speaker 2: a nugget from the trail when I was running, just
Speaker 2: thinking of life. We've heard it's not a sprint, it's
Speaker 2: a marathon. I don't think it's a marathon. I think
Speaker 2: it's an ultra marathon on a trail and here is why.
Speaker 1: You know a few things.
Speaker 2: One, it's really long guys, you know, even a short life.
Speaker 2: It feels like, man, there's a lot of suffering that's
Speaker 2: going into this if we're doing it right. It's not
Speaker 2: a straight line. There's there's paths in this relationship that
Speaker 2: will wind ways that you don't really know, and there's
Speaker 2: going to be a bunch of climbs and a bunch
Speaker 2: of descents. But also on a trail run. Much in life,
Speaker 2: you always always have to be aware that there are
Speaker 2: snakes on the trail. And I don't know these people.
Speaker 2: I don't know y'all's relationship. But if there is a
Speaker 2: sense that you have that there are boundaries that need
Speaker 2: to be put in place, that's okay. That's an okay
Speaker 2: thing to recognize and to put in place. I'm not
Speaker 2: calling these people snakes, like please stop sending your email
Speaker 2: back to us like I don't know. I'm just speaking
Speaker 2: generally that we do need And this is something I've
Speaker 2: personally experienced and learned from, is that it is okay
Speaker 2: to have boundaries with people that we feel like.
Speaker 1: We need to have boundaries for it. Let's take a Break,
Speaker 1: Beer It Back podcast is sponsored by Better Help. You know,
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Speaker 1: slash granger. Getting so excited we're getting closer to August first.
Speaker 1: That's the day Like a River comes out my book,
Speaker 1: and I am just so pumped. I actually just finished
Speaker 1: reading the audiobook and I looked at that. It's one
Speaker 1: of the best parts of this process is being able
Speaker 1: to read the audiobook and show my inflections in the
Speaker 1: places that I wanted to show it. So anyway, I'm
Speaker 1: just I'm so excited for anybody to read it or
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Speaker 1: nuggets you can get right now, including a downloadable chapter
Speaker 1: of the book that you could read right now. That's
Speaker 1: pretty cool, plus some extra little things. You could pre
Speaker 1: order that book right now, like a river at grangersmith
Speaker 1: dot com. All right, if you have a question for
Speaker 1: me in this podcast, email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com.
Speaker 1: Could be about any subject. We're gonna walk through it.
Speaker 1: We're not always right, but we're gonna walk through it
Speaker 1: as friends would and discuss whatever is on your heart,
Speaker 1: whatever's on your mind or in your life. And we
Speaker 1: see that it's kind of all over the place.
Speaker 2: Did y'all hear that?
Speaker 1: He said?
Speaker 2: Any subject you can get as creative anything you would
Speaker 2: ever want to ask granger Smith.
Speaker 1: Go for it. Here we go. Subdecline says a high
Speaker 1: school junior who loves someone. Hey, Grainger, my name is Joshua.
Speaker 1: I'm seventeen years old. I'm a junior. I hope your
Speaker 1: day was good. But there's a girl. There's the question, right.
Speaker 1: But there's this girl that I went to prom with
Speaker 1: and it was fun. But I asked her out and
Speaker 1: she said she'll think about it, and then next week
Speaker 1: she got with my best friend. This girl means a
Speaker 1: lot to me. This was back in March. But should
Speaker 1: I keep waiting or try and move forward? I don't
Speaker 1: really know what to do. Thank you for taking your
Speaker 1: time reading my email. I hope you have a good
Speaker 1: rest of the day. Joshua, thanks for emailing, brother.
Speaker 2: So I'm gonna go back to Somerset earlier. We always
Speaker 2: advise to wait on the Lord. We do not advise
Speaker 2: to wait on seventeen year old girls. Not for a minute.
Speaker 1: Oh it's so good. Yeah, that's the new theme of
Speaker 1: this podcast. Wait on the Lord. Don't wait on your
Speaker 1: girl to be seventeen again to have this kind of problem. Buddy,
Speaker 1: you were going through something that you must go through
Speaker 1: and you that's really interesting actually, because I'm actually writing
Speaker 1: a paper in seminary and the paper is going to
Speaker 1: be called there must be Battle and you. Not only
Speaker 1: is this is this a scenario that's possible for seventeen
Speaker 1: year old boys to go through. Not only is this
Speaker 1: something that is suggested that maybe it could help you,
Speaker 1: but I'm gonna suggest to you that you have to
Speaker 1: go through this at seventeen or somewhere around here. You
Speaker 1: have to know what it's like to be rejected or
Speaker 1: to be hurt or to see her go to another guy,
Speaker 1: because this is gonna work for you. It's gonna matter
Speaker 1: to you later in your perception of girls and relationships
Speaker 1: and so so you can't see it now, but I
Speaker 1: want to encourage you that this is actually good. This
Speaker 1: is a good thing. And the fact that she goes
Speaker 1: to your best friend, hang on. You asked her to prom.
Speaker 1: You went to prom. That's kind of a big deal.
Speaker 1: You go to prom, right and then the next week
Speaker 1: or you asked her out. She said she'll think about it.
Speaker 1: Then she went with your friend. Buddy, this girl is
Speaker 1: not for you and you shouldn't wait on that. There's
Speaker 1: a lot more girls.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, I'm gonna give you, Joshua, the greatest advice
Speaker 2: for a seventeen year old boy that has ever been given.
Speaker 2: Learn to play the guitar. You learn to play the guitar,
Speaker 2: and you are gonna have girls all around you. And
Speaker 2: you tell her eat your heart out. Baby. You had
Speaker 2: your shot.
Speaker 1: At the kid.
Speaker 2: You only get one and you just sing and sing. Dude,
Speaker 2: pick up a guitar, buddy.
Speaker 1: Learn the guitar. Bro. That's a great piece of advice.
Speaker 1: Let's move on here. Septicon here, says friend in need. Hey, Granger,
Speaker 1: I've got a friend that's a war veteran and he's
Speaker 1: been looking for an answer to a question of his.
Speaker 1: The question is, when you are at war, you commit
Speaker 1: great sins. What does God think about me? Since I've
Speaker 1: committed these sins. He's been searching for an answer for
Speaker 1: quite a while, but has yet to find a good answer.
Speaker 1: He's read the scriptures, he knows the stories, but he
Speaker 1: has not heard a message from God. I cannot help him,
Speaker 1: for I am not a Christian myself, but I know
Speaker 1: and can see that it causes him distress to think
Speaker 1: that the sins he has committed can never be redeemed,
Speaker 1: and that pushes him towards that pushes him from Christ.
Speaker 1: He feels that he is a wolf in sheep's clothing,
Speaker 1: but only to protect the flock from other wolves. If
Speaker 1: you can give an answer to this and show him
Speaker 1: on the podcast, that may give him some consolation. Thanks.
Speaker 1: Interesting question, But I know that this is probably European.
Speaker 1: This is not American because of the name here. Floky
Speaker 1: Flo Okay, I so, okay. There's so much packed in here.
Speaker 1: It's very interesting and one of the interesting things about
Speaker 1: it is the fact that I'm pretty sure you're not American.
Speaker 1: And only only in America would someone pretend to be
Speaker 1: a Christian in this email. And only outside of America
Speaker 1: would they say, can you help him? Because I'm not
Speaker 1: a Christian? And so, first of all, kudos to you
Speaker 1: for calling it like it is. And then there's something
Speaker 1: else that's kind of facked into this question when he
Speaker 1: says he's been searching for an answer for quite a
Speaker 1: while but has yet to find a good answer. Let
Speaker 1: me just hang there for a second. He's searching for
Speaker 1: quite a while yet to find a good answer. How
Speaker 1: many of y'all have said something like that. Here's what's
Speaker 1: interesting about truth. It is objective. Truth is truth. It
Speaker 1: is objective, So we don't search for the best version
Speaker 1: of the truth. That would be strange to search for
Speaker 1: a subjective truth. And what it almost sounds like is
Speaker 1: that he's been asking the question but no one's given
Speaker 1: him an answer that he agrees.
Speaker 2: With, even the scriptures, because it says that he he's
Speaker 2: read the scriptures and he knows the stories, but he
Speaker 2: has not heard a message from God that is a
Speaker 2: message from God.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, so floky without knowing it I hope you're
Speaker 1: listening to this podcast, by the way, because I'm giving
Speaker 1: you a lot of credit for calling this just like
Speaker 1: you see it and not pretending to be a cultural
Speaker 1: Christian in this email. But what's interesting is the email.
Speaker 1: This question might be for you more than your friend,
Speaker 1: but I hope that you hear it and need to
Speaker 1: relay this information to him. What Bernie's saying is there
Speaker 1: is maybe a misconception that hearing from God and reading
Speaker 1: the Bible are two separate events when we know now
Speaker 1: that hearing from God comes through reading the ever living,
Speaker 1: breathing Word of God, which is the Bible. So when
Speaker 1: you read the scriptures, you're hearing from God, whether or
Speaker 1: not you like the information you're reading or hearing or not. Right,
Speaker 1: So that's an interesting concept. You don't even have to
Speaker 1: be a Christian to hear from God. If you read
Speaker 1: the scriptures. Now, your ears might not be opened, your
Speaker 1: eyes might not be open to what you're seeing and hearing,
Speaker 1: but that doesn't change the fact that you are hearing
Speaker 1: from God. So this is what I'm saying. We haven't
Speaker 1: even gotten to the question at all, but there's some
Speaker 1: interesting things packed in here. So truth is objective. There
Speaker 1: is only one truth. So when we search for truth,
Speaker 1: we're not looking to find the best version we like
Speaker 1: to hear or what makes the most sense to us.
Speaker 1: There is only one truth, and in the truth, the
Speaker 1: Bible is going to say that your sins are forgiven,
Speaker 1: no matter the cost, because it was paid for by
Speaker 1: the most precious resource in the universe, and that is
Speaker 1: the blood of the Son of God. So if you
Speaker 1: say friend, if you say war veteran, I don't even
Speaker 1: know his name. But if you're saying that your sins
Speaker 1: are so great because what you committed in war, then
Speaker 1: Christ death didn't wasn't all encompassing. It didn't matter for everyone.
Speaker 1: That just mattered for some or maybe even most, but
Speaker 1: not for you.
Speaker 2: The death or some sins but not some sins liked.
Speaker 1: Not this bad at sin. So you're saying that Jesus
Speaker 1: died on the cross, I'm not even speaking about my belief.
Speaker 1: I'm just speaking about the story as revealed in the scripture,
Speaker 1: the story of the resurrection and the crucifixion. What you're
Speaker 1: saying is going against two thousand years of church doctrine
Speaker 1: and teaching that that knows the objective truth of what
Speaker 1: that word says that Jesus, once again, regardless of what
Speaker 1: you believe, this is what is claimed by Jesus himself
Speaker 1: that when he died and was resurrected, all sins were forgiven.
Speaker 1: It was totally finished. He said, it is finished, all
Speaker 1: of it. It was done in the death of the
Speaker 1: Son of God followed by the resurrection. So you come
Speaker 1: in war veteran and say, but not my sins. It
Speaker 1: wasn't totally effective because there was some leftover sins here
Speaker 1: right right then. I'm not even speaking from my own faith.
Speaker 1: I'm just saying this is what the scripture says.
Speaker 2: Yeah, if your friend happens to be listening or I
Speaker 2: would love to hear more from them on this. Like
Speaker 2: one thing that you said that they feel is they
Speaker 2: feel like a wolf in sheep's clothing. I think I
Speaker 2: feel like what is happening and this is a war
Speaker 2: vet and I I'm guessing that there has been probably
Speaker 2: some trauma that he's been through. I don't know that
Speaker 2: he's worked through with a counselor with a Christian counselor
Speaker 2: if he is, you know, a believer, but I think
Speaker 2: that I have. I think I've mentioned this song by
Speaker 2: Shane and Shane on here before embracing accusations. And there's
Speaker 2: a line in this in this song that's from the
Speaker 2: Scripture that says, you know, the devil is singing over
Speaker 2: me this age old song that I am cursed and
Speaker 2: gone astray, and and what he's referencing is the Old Testament,
Speaker 2: like you know, all who have gone astray are cursed
Speaker 2: in And the song goes on to say, but he's
Speaker 2: he's singing the first verse conveniently over me. He's forgetting
Speaker 2: the refrain that Jesus saves. And so I think that
Speaker 2: you may have the enemy in your ear war veteran
Speaker 2: saying like you did this sin, You're you're cursed and
Speaker 2: God can't save you you because his word says this,
Speaker 2: and you you did this and that's it, instead of
Speaker 2: hearing the refrain that Grangeer is talking about, which is
Speaker 2: the gospel like Jesus saves. And I don't I feel
Speaker 2: like this guy we were talking earlier about Paul with Toner, right, Ye,
Speaker 2: Paul is another character that we can look at that
Speaker 2: that dude killed a lot of people and probably in
Speaker 2: a very different way than you did. So if you're
Speaker 2: reading these stories. I hope that there is some hope
Speaker 2: in reading the story of Paul and what God did
Speaker 2: in his life and his you know, went on to
Speaker 2: use him for.
Speaker 1: But I don't know. Yeah, buddy, let me say, let
Speaker 1: me kind of flip the script a little bit too,
Speaker 1: because first of all, you say, his quest is when
Speaker 1: you are at war, you commit great sins. Let me
Speaker 1: change the sentence and make it also accurate. When you
Speaker 1: are a human born of a woman, you commit great sins.
Speaker 1: We are all sinners from birth. We are infected with
Speaker 1: the disease. Yeah.
Speaker 2: I think he's got a misconception.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we are all infected with a disease. There is
Speaker 1: a cure, and his name is Jesus. Here's the next,
Speaker 1: here's the next. This is fascinating, Okay, and I'm not
Speaker 1: going to hold anything back on this, But you say,
Speaker 1: what does God think about me? Since I've committed those thins,
Speaker 1: those sins wrath, the wrath of God is upon you
Speaker 1: and everyone. If you're not under the grace of Jesus,
Speaker 1: you're under the wrath of him. It doesn't matter what
Speaker 1: you've done, because sins are sins, and you are born
Speaker 1: a sinner. You're born a rebel and you were born.
Speaker 1: We said, last break not worthy, undeserving, but through the
Speaker 1: blood of Christ, who accomplis who defeated death in one moment,
Speaker 1: completely destroyed it. In trusting in that you have been
Speaker 1: redeemed and restored and ransomed from your old self. You
Speaker 1: became a new self, a new creature. So you turn
Speaker 1: from your old ways. You turn. That's called repentance, and
Speaker 1: that's a response from the salvation. So that's how you
Speaker 1: know the salvation worked because you seeing yourself starting to
Speaker 1: hate it. So my question to the veteran Bernie would
Speaker 1: ask the same thing. If we were live live podcast,
Speaker 1: we would say, those sins that you committed in war,
Speaker 1: how do you feel about it? And if he says,
Speaker 1: I hate them, let me go good. That's exactly where you
Speaker 1: need to be. Yeah, and we should say that about
Speaker 1: everything are idolatry. You think the things that I start
Speaker 1: becoming that become an idol in my life. I start
Speaker 1: idolizing certain things in my life. Do you think that's
Speaker 1: not any worse to a war crime to God? Idolizing
Speaker 1: something other than your own creator. When I do that,
Speaker 1: that is tyranny, that is sabotage, that is blasphemy, and
Speaker 1: so God doesn't look at that differently. We are rebels
Speaker 1: until we are under the grace of Jesus. So flee
Speaker 1: to him. Run to him as fast as you can.
Speaker 1: Turn from the old self, turn from the old war
Speaker 1: crimes or whatever crimes that you've committed, because we all
Speaker 1: have them, and run to him. Run to him. He
Speaker 1: wraps his arms around you metaphorically, and the grace of
Speaker 1: Him is on top of you. God no longer sees
Speaker 1: your sin. He just sees perfection in his son. That's
Speaker 1: the gospel.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Floky, I guess is the persure. Maybe you could
Speaker 2: just sit and read the scripture with your friend and
Speaker 2: maybe you guys could like talk about it together and
Speaker 2: wrestle through. You don't believe, so no harm, right, but
Speaker 2: you're doing it for your friend. Maybe you guys could
Speaker 2: just sit and talk about it. You could ask him
Speaker 2: questions because your view of that could help him to
Speaker 2: understand and like really study it together. And your eyes
Speaker 2: may be open to eternal life, which would be awesome too.
Speaker 1: So wouldn't hurt. It's good? Nice question. See what you're
Speaker 1: doing there burning? I see through your way.
Speaker 2: I just say it's just a you know, just an
Speaker 2: option idea. It's what could have.
Speaker 1: Hurt seb Decline says, what's your view as a dad? Hey, Grandeur,
Speaker 1: I'm twenty two years old. I'd like to remain anonymous.
Speaker 1: There's this guy and he's thirty six. He has expressed
Speaker 1: that he likes me through letters and sending me gifts,
Speaker 1: but he hasn't even talked to my stepdad or my
Speaker 1: mom to see if it's okay. He recently came all
Speaker 1: the way from California to a church event that we
Speaker 1: had in our hometown and he even and even then
Speaker 1: he didn't even talk to me what. I'm not interested,
Speaker 1: but I'm not sure how to tell him. I know
Speaker 1: God has other plans for me, and he is not
Speaker 1: one of them. My pastors say they are okay with it,
Speaker 1: but my parents and I both agree that's not their place.
Speaker 1: My stepdad has really held back from telling me telling
Speaker 1: them anything, and he has told me that God will
Speaker 1: see me through. But how do I tell this guy
Speaker 1: to leave me alone without hurting him? Thanks? I'm sorry
Speaker 1: for the long message.
Speaker 2: This is the kind of stuff I'm talking about. You guys,
Speaker 2: sin in love it. There's so much going on that
Speaker 2: I don't understand in color to this email. This is beautiful.
Speaker 2: Let's break it down.
Speaker 1: Jennifer.
Speaker 2: So, she's twenty two, he's thirty six.
Speaker 1: Yep.
Speaker 2: He lives in California.
Speaker 1: Yep.
Speaker 2: She lives in I don't know, somewhere not California, yep. Right,
Speaker 2: this whole thing was starting off like.
Speaker 1: She loved him, I love him, and they don't.
Speaker 2: Understand, and you know, Romeo and Juliet style, right, take
Speaker 2: a turn, but like, I don't know what the problem is.
Speaker 2: You don't like him?
Speaker 1: Yeah, so you know what this probably is. It's probably
Speaker 1: a product of a like a dating app or social
Speaker 1: media of some sort. That's what I'm thinking. This is
Speaker 1: a product of a dating app. And they met, and
Speaker 1: they he decided to make a trip to from California
Speaker 1: to the hometown to the church event, and then he
Speaker 1: was awkward. He didn't really talk. You've got she's got
Speaker 1: all these people speaking into her life, like pastors and
Speaker 1: parents and step parents.
Speaker 2: And you said her name.
Speaker 1: I know, forget that, I said that.
Speaker 2: Okay, So here's the deal, Anonymous. If you don't like
Speaker 2: this dude, communicate that to him clearly, and he must
Speaker 2: respect you. If he doesn't, you need to talk to somebody,
Speaker 2: like the police, like the police, or you know, is
Speaker 2: she living with her mom and dad? Well, okay, yeah,
Speaker 2: talk talk to somebody and tell him, like, hey, this dude,
Speaker 2: I met him on this app and we met this
Speaker 2: one time. But like I have made it clear and
Speaker 2: he is being aggressive and he won't let it go.
Speaker 2: You have got to say something and he must respect
Speaker 2: you one way or another.
Speaker 1: You know what I do like about this? I do
Speaker 1: like that you I kind of almost criticized it, but
Speaker 1: I like that you have a lot of people speaking
Speaker 1: into you, and it seems like a lot of people
Speaker 1: that love you are speaking into you, and you're you're
Speaker 1: kind of getting advice, which you could take with a
Speaker 1: grain of salt, but you're still You're feeling the love
Speaker 1: around you and you're not just isolated. And this situation
Speaker 1: could get bad if you were isolated by yourself. I
Speaker 1: don't like the age difference, to be honest with you,
Speaker 1: I don't like the fourteen years between you two. It
Speaker 1: doesn't make me feel comfortable. Your subject line says, what's
Speaker 1: your view as a dad? I'm wondering if you mean
Speaker 1: like dad of her?
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's a home, it's a note.
Speaker 1: Sure, for sure, he's fourteen years older, lives in California,
Speaker 1: and he's probably you found him on a dating app.
Speaker 1: I'm like, no, so Bernie's right, you need to say it.
Speaker 1: How he reacts to it determines your next step. But
Speaker 1: you could say it with grace and kindness, and you
Speaker 1: could say you could say whatever your name is. I
Speaker 1: just want to be completely honest with you. I'm not
Speaker 1: interested romantically or in a friendship, and I appreciate you
Speaker 1: caring thus far. I think you're a sweet person. I
Speaker 1: am not interested at all, and there is nothing I
Speaker 1: am interested for in the future.
Speaker 2: You're just in all caps.
Speaker 1: You're cutting it off completely and you say best of
Speaker 1: wishes with the rest of your life.
Speaker 2: Okay, bye bye.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but we think we have time to hit one
Speaker 1: more in just a few minutes. Let's do it.
Speaker 2: Let's do it.
Speaker 1: Okay, this is gonna be a speed one.
Speaker 2: You guys doing okay out there?
Speaker 1: Thinking handle one? How about one that's called girl Trouble. Hey, Grangdeer,
Speaker 1: A big fan of yours, and I would like to
Speaker 1: remain anonymous. Yes, I'll remember that. I'm from Utah. I've
Speaker 1: been listening to the podcast while my friend recommended me
Speaker 1: listening to this podcast a while back, and quite recently,
Speaker 1: I have discovered I still have feelings for this girl
Speaker 1: that I have known for eight years. We met in
Speaker 1: the fourth grade. I've had deep feelings since we met.
Speaker 1: Seeing that we will be graduating the twenty sixth of
Speaker 1: this month, I feel like I should go and ask
Speaker 1: her on a date. But at the same time, I'm
Speaker 1: confused because I have been single for a while now,
Speaker 1: and it seems that I've decided to I haven't decided
Speaker 1: what to do. I deeply believe in God and that
Speaker 1: he has plans for each of us. Any advice would
Speaker 1: be greatly appreciated. Thank you for your time and advice.
Speaker 1: God bless you and your family. Okay, well, thank goodness.
Speaker 1: This is the question we get just a couple of
Speaker 1: minutes because we we're going to say, go for it, man.
Speaker 2: Yeah, go for it. Are we scared?
Speaker 1: Go for it?
Speaker 2: I don't know why he threw the last part in.
Speaker 2: I believe in God and he has a plan for
Speaker 2: all of us. Okay, that's great.
Speaker 1: Too, buddy. You need to be vulnerable and be open,
Speaker 1: and I think I think girls are attracted to that.
Speaker 1: If you just come out and say can I take
Speaker 1: you up for coffee? And then she says yes, and
Speaker 1: then you go at the coffee place, you're like, actually,
Speaker 1: you're from Utah, so maybe lemonade you could say? Can
Speaker 1: I be honest with you? I am so intimidated by
Speaker 1: you because you're so pretty, and I've liked you for
Speaker 1: a long time and I just have kind of put
Speaker 1: off asking you because I just think you're You're really pretty.
Speaker 1: And I even emailed Granger Smith to ask him what
Speaker 1: he thought about the situation. So he told me to.
Speaker 2: Do it, and I'm doing what he said. Yeah, and
Speaker 2: then player the podcast and you guys go for a
Speaker 2: little drink, lemonade, whatever.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Yeah, that's all I got. Man, go for it.
Speaker 1: Go for it. We love you. Go for it.
Speaker 2: Y'all are the best Granger Smith fans or the podcast fans.
Speaker 1: If you want to see guys travel and do a
Speaker 1: live version of this in your town, let me know
Speaker 1: comment below or hit me up on Instagram and let
Speaker 1: us know where to go. But we'd love to go
Speaker 1: travel and bring the podcast live to you do live
Speaker 1: Q and A. It would be so fun. Love you guys,
Speaker 1: so you Yeah, thanks for joining me on the Granger
Speaker 1: Smith Podcast. I appreciate all of you guys. You could
Speaker 1: help me out by rating this podcast on iTunes. If
Speaker 1: you're on YouTube, subscribe to this channel. Hit that little
Speaker 1: like button and notification spell so that you never miss
Speaker 1: anytime I upload a video. If you have a question
Speaker 1: for me that you would like me to answer, email
Speaker 1: Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. Ye