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Speaker 1: I just announced all my tour dates. They just went

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Speaker 1: on sale. It's called the High and Mighty Tour. I

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Speaker 1: will be starting debuting my new material in February of

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Speaker 1: next year, So I'm coming to Washington, d c Norfolk, Virginia, Madison, Wisconsin, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, Detroit, Michigan, Cleveland, Columbus,

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Speaker 1: and Cincinnati, Ohio, Denver, Colorado, Portland, Maine, Providence, Rhode Island, Springfield, Massachusetts, Chicago,

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Speaker 1: of Course, Indianapolis, Indiana, Louisville, Kentucky, Albuquerque, Masa, Arizona, Kansas City, Missouri,

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Speaker 1: Saint Louis, Missouri, Minneapolis, Minnesota, Nashville, Tennessee, Charlotte, North Carolina, Durham,

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Speaker 1: North of Carolina, Saratoga, California, Monterey, California, Modesto, California, and

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Speaker 1: port Chester, New York, Boston, Massachusetts, Portland, Oregon, and Seattle, Washington.

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Speaker 1: I will be touring from February through June. Those are

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Speaker 1: the cities that I'm in, So go get your tickets

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Speaker 1: now if you want good seats and you want to

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Speaker 1: come see me perform.

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Speaker 2: I will be on the High and Mighty Tour.

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Speaker 3: Hi, Gatherine, Hi, Chelsea. I publishedn'tays, but Happy Halloween.

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Speaker 1: Oh god, I was trying to be a flying Hall

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Speaker 1: on Halloween so that I wouldn't have to show up

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Speaker 1: at any parties.

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Speaker 2: I mean, I'm not going to show up at any parties.

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Speaker 1: Somebody invited me to a party with like that Severance

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Speaker 1: logo and it was the bottom half of my head

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Speaker 1: and the top half of Severance, and I was like,

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Speaker 1: I hope this is just the invitation.

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Speaker 2: For me and not the whole party. But no, I

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Speaker 2: don't you know how I feel about Halloween.

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Speaker 3: Dude, You're not a dresser upper.

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Speaker 1: No not.

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Speaker 2: Are you looking forward to it? You'll die for me

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Speaker 2: to ask you so you can talk about it.

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Speaker 4: Well, I'm just going to have a little party because

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Speaker 4: Brad's birthday is around this time, so we'll be throwing

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Speaker 4: a little parties. We're gonna have like a Halloween slash

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Speaker 4: birthday party and yeah, just you know, still kind of

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Speaker 4: cobbling together a costume.

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Speaker 3: But you know, I love Halloween.

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Speaker 2: I know I know how you feel about Halloween.

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Speaker 1: I want to remind listeners that I've added to my

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Speaker 1: boycott of home Depot because of companies that cooperate with ICE.

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Speaker 2: Now we're adding Spotify. I deleted Spotify. I've deleted TikTok.

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Speaker 1: I still have a TikTok account that my social media manages,

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Speaker 1: but I don't scroll TikTok anymore.

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Speaker 2: I think the government running that is a shit show.

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Speaker 1: And I so I'm boycotting home Depot and I'm boycotting

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Speaker 1: Spotify and more to come.

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Speaker 4: Great, great, And I'm sure continuing on with the Target

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Speaker 4: boycott after the removal of the DA.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, Target is over. Which is the good store Walmart?

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Speaker 3: I don't know.

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Speaker 4: I mean they were always like the traditional evils. Costco

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Speaker 4: is pretty good, Like Costco.

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Speaker 2: Is Costco's good? Right they do?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, cause I'd like to promote these good companies that

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Speaker 1: do good things, and like for hardware stores, like you know,

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Speaker 1: local hardware stores.

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Speaker 2: If we could all start shot.

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Speaker 1: There's supposed to be some economic blackout that starts November

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Speaker 1: twenty fifth through December second. I saw Rose O'donnald posted

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Speaker 1: about that, So that would be great if we can

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Speaker 1: all get on board with that.

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Speaker 2: No shopping, no restaurants.

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Speaker 1: I mean that's a little conflicting because I have a

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Speaker 1: show on November twenty ninth in Vegas.

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Speaker 2: But I care more about the country than I care

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Speaker 2: about my show.

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Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, anyway, Economic Blackout November twenty something, I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: post about it.

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Speaker 2: The only thing that anybody cares about is money. I

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Speaker 2: can't These ice videos are so disgusting. This administration is

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Speaker 2: so gross. Who's our guest today? Are they going to

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Speaker 2: cheer us up?

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Speaker 4: Our guest today is Nicholas Sparks. He co wrote his

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Speaker 4: first spooky novel with m Night Shyamalan. They made the

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Speaker 4: story together, and his new novel, Remain Also is now

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Speaker 4: a New York Times number one bestseller.

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Speaker 2: Oh right, we have another author today. We have we're

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Speaker 2: back to back author weeks. By the way, I've read

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Speaker 2: Malala's book this week.

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Speaker 1: And I've read Laura Lynn Jackson's who are both upcoming guests.

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Speaker 2: Malala's funny. I'm into her, She's real funny good.

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Speaker 1: Okay, Yeah, So Nicholas Sparks is here today, another best selling,

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Speaker 1: very famous all. I'm so excited to have him on

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Speaker 1: and talk to him about his new novel.

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Speaker 2: So let's get going. Nicholas Sparks, Welcome to Dear Chelsea.

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Speaker 5: Hey, I'm thrilled to be here. How fun is this?

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, it's the King of Romance.

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Speaker 5: The King. That's what they say, aren't you inspiring today?

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Speaker 5: I appreciate that.

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Speaker 2: Oh no, oh, I'm here to inspire the whole world.

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Speaker 1: We're in a dearth of inspiration, so I'm here to

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Speaker 1: help and you're here to help. I was just going

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Speaker 1: over the list of books that you've written. I mean

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Speaker 1: a lot of them have been made into movies, so

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Speaker 1: a lot of them. But let me just read them

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Speaker 1: out loud to you in case you've forgotten any remain.

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Speaker 1: Counting Remain is the newest one. That's what we're going

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Speaker 1: to be talking about today. Everybody Remain, a Counting Miracles, Dreamland,

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Speaker 1: The Wish, The Return, Every Breath, two by two, See Me,

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Speaker 1: The Longest Ride, The Best of Me, Safe Haven, The

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Speaker 1: Last Song, The Lucky One, The Choice, Dear John, at

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Speaker 1: First Sight, True Believer, Three Weeks with My Brother, The Wedding,

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Speaker 1: The Guardian, The Nights in Rodanthe. Yeah, I've watched something.

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Speaker 1: I've watched that a couple of times. I like Diane

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Speaker 1: Lane And who's the guy in that in the.

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Speaker 5: Movie, Richard Gear.

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Speaker 2: Oh, yeah, of course they were so hot together. They

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Speaker 2: were in that. Yeah, they were in a couple of

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Speaker 2: a walk to.

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Speaker 1: Remember message in a Bottle, which was another classic, and

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Speaker 1: The Notebook, which I think is probably the most popular of.

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Speaker 2: Them all so far so far.

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Speaker 1: But what's interesting, We're going to get into your movies

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Speaker 1: and your well, your books that were made into movies,

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Speaker 1: and your books that you've written in a minute, but

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Speaker 1: I wanted to talk a little about your latest Remain,

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Speaker 1: which you co wrote. Is this the first time you've

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Speaker 1: ever co written something with anyone?

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Speaker 5: Well, I did a nonfiction book with my brother years ago,

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Speaker 5: three weeks with my brother that you you referenced there,

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Speaker 5: and so he and I were the co writers on that.

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Speaker 5: And then for the last song the screenplay, there was

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Speaker 5: a I worked with a co writer on that.

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Speaker 1: Okay, So what tell me about the difference in between that,

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Speaker 1: because this is you co wrote with M. Knight Shamalan,

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Speaker 1: who I used to call m Night Shaka Khan until

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Speaker 1: I could figure out how to pronounce his name properly.

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Speaker 2: So now I can, and I'm pretty excited about it.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, this was very different. The way we worked together

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Speaker 5: primarily was I gave him a long leash when it

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Speaker 5: came to the film, and he gave me a long

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Speaker 5: leash when it came to the novel, and you really

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Speaker 5: the way to think about this is the two of

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Speaker 5: us conceived this story together, and then he did one

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Speaker 5: side of the coin, the film side, and I did

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Speaker 5: the other side of the coin, the novel side. And

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Speaker 5: so I didn't really dig in and hammered down and

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Speaker 5: give long detailed notes on the screenplay, and he didn't edit,

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Speaker 5: for instance, the novel. We both decided to take this

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Speaker 5: story that we both came up with, and I did

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Speaker 5: my medium and he did his. It's the best way

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Speaker 5: to think about it.

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Speaker 1: Did you guys check in with each other like what

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Speaker 1: were did you have ten polls that you had to

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Speaker 1: follow or any sort of storyline that you had to

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Speaker 1: stick to so that they would be now and goetes

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Speaker 1: to each other.

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Speaker 5: Oh yeah, here, So here's how it came about, right,

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Speaker 5: it's a very Hollywood thing. In the original part, it

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Speaker 5: was I have people in Hollywood. He has people in Hollywood.

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Speaker 5: My people got to with his people. I don't know,

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Speaker 5: they're at a party or something, said hey we should

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Speaker 5: get Nick and Knight. They should do something together.

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Speaker 6: You know.

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Speaker 5: I hear this from my Hollywood people all the time, right,

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Speaker 5: And ninety nine percent of them amount to nothing well.

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Speaker 5: That was in early January twenty three, and then in

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Speaker 5: March twenty three, my guy calls me and he says,

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Speaker 5: you've got a meeting with Knight. It's going to be

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Speaker 5: an in Pennsylvania at Knight's place. And the goal for

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Speaker 5: that meeting was I was going to come up with

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Speaker 5: an original story that would work as both a novel

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Speaker 5: and a film and that would satisfy my readers and

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Speaker 5: his fans. And then he was going to do the

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Speaker 5: same thing. So then we met in May of twenty

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Speaker 5: twenty three, primarily to see if we wanted to work

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Speaker 5: with each other, if we could work with each other,

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Speaker 5: if it was going to be more hassle than at Worth,

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Speaker 5: because are we both Prima Donna's. You know, people can

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Speaker 5: add stress to your life, and neither of us want

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Speaker 5: where we've reached. We've been at this thirty years. We

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Speaker 5: don't need more stress, right right, So we had this

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Speaker 5: great meeting. I pitched my idea, he pitched his. We

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Speaker 5: decided jointly to do his idea, and we hammered out

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Speaker 5: all of the or most of these specifics on the

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Speaker 5: idea that eventually became remain So then I didn't hear

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Speaker 5: anything until August of twenty twenty four, just a year

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Speaker 5: a year ago, August, so not that long ago. And

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Speaker 5: he calls me up and he says, I think this

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Speaker 5: is going to be my next movie, which means he's

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Speaker 5: going to write, direct, and produce. And so I say, oh,

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Speaker 5: then I guess I'm going to do a novel. Because

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Speaker 5: I didn't know what. He didn't know what we were

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Speaker 5: going to do. What were we going to do together?

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Speaker 5: Was I going to write a short story and he

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Speaker 5: would produce it. Was I going to do a novella?

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Speaker 5: Were we going to do a TV show? We didn't know. Anyways,

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Speaker 5: said this is going to be my next movie. So

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Speaker 5: I decide to do a novel. So he works on

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Speaker 5: the screenplay for about six weeks from late August till

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Speaker 5: about October twelfth. I talked to him two or three

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Speaker 5: times a week. You know, I'm cheerleading, I'm brainstorming, I'm

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Speaker 5: doing whatever.

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Speaker 1: And are you guys making sure that you're on similar pages? No,

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Speaker 1: pun intended, he was.

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Speaker 5: We already knew what the story was because we had

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Speaker 5: hammered that out in May of the previous year. So

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Speaker 5: then I get the script. I said, Okay, this is great.

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Speaker 5: This is exactly the story we talked about. But I'm

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Speaker 5: in a different medium. You know, I have more room

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Speaker 5: for backstory, I have more runway. I can hop into

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Speaker 5: the character's heads a little bit more.

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Speaker 6: So.

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Speaker 5: I set aside the novel I was working on and

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Speaker 5: started writing Remain in October, all of a sudden, on

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Speaker 5: a very big deadline. Finish it in January. This was

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Speaker 5: just last January. Go through the editing process. Here we are,

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Speaker 5: the book's coming out, the movies all ready been filmed,

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Speaker 5: and he's in the editing room. The novel's coming out,

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Speaker 5: and the film will be out in twenty twenty six,

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Speaker 5: very fast.

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Speaker 3: That's such a tight timeline.

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Speaker 4: You wrote the book starting in October and it's coming

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Speaker 4: out the following October.

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Speaker 1: Basically, why do you have any separation between the book

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Speaker 1: and the movie coming out? Because I would think it

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Speaker 1: would be fun to have them both released at the

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Speaker 1: same time.

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Speaker 5: Primarily because you want to have a couple of lives

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Speaker 5: on the book. Basically, you want to have a hardcover

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Speaker 5: life and then a paperback life. So if you see

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Speaker 5: the cover of Remain, right, so it's really pretty and

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Speaker 5: it's a great book cover, but so we'll have that cover.

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Speaker 5: That'll be the hardcover, and then when the paperback comes along, well,

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Speaker 5: now we're probably going to see Jake and Phoebe on

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Speaker 5: the I say, right on the paperback.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so Jake Jillen Hall starring in the movie with

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Speaker 1: Phoebe de Neever right our dinover din Okay, okay, the

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Speaker 1: girl from Bridgerton who Yeah, she's really good.

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Speaker 2: Okay.

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Speaker 1: So as a writer, I mean, first of all, you're

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Speaker 1: responsible for so many broken hearts. I just want to

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Speaker 1: come out and say that I don't know. I mean,

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Speaker 1: there must have been so many couples that lee that

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Speaker 1: read your books and or leave the theater after seeing

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Speaker 1: these movies and just leave their boyfriends. They're like, where's

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Speaker 1: where's my fucking message in a bottle? You know, like

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Speaker 1: I could only imagine because I remember as a young

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Speaker 1: person when I would watch, like when I would read

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Speaker 1: something really like romantic, because these books aren't like lusty,

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Speaker 1: I wouldn't.

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Speaker 2: It's not like smuty. I mean, their love stories.

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Speaker 1: You're kind of known for writing romantic novels, right, and

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Speaker 1: not all of them have happy endings, right, right, So

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Speaker 1: it's not like it's just always the same formula. But

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Speaker 1: I would imagine that you've gotten a lot of feedback

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Speaker 1: about setting a measure of a standard of love and

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Speaker 1: romance at a certain level that a lot of men

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Speaker 1: probably can't attain or can't measure up to.

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Speaker 5: I have heard such stories at my book signings, right

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Speaker 5: They're like, where's all where's my no, or where's my

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Speaker 5: John from dear John, or where's my land? And from

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Speaker 5: a walk to remember. I do hear those stories. And

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Speaker 5: at the same time, I think, in the course of

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Speaker 5: my career, I've had seven marriage proposals in lines to

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Speaker 5: sign my book. You know, I'll get up to the

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Speaker 5: table the duodle dropped to his knees, and I feel

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Speaker 5: so bad for him. I'm like, dude, you're you're in

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Speaker 5: a Walmart in Birmingham, Alabama. You know you really would

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Speaker 5: have proposed it a Walmart and Birmingham or something like that.

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Speaker 5: But it's happened, and you know, I hear. I get

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Speaker 5: a lot of letters also from people who who say

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Speaker 5: that the stories either remind me of their love story

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Speaker 5: or someone they love. I can't tell you how many

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Speaker 5: people wrote said the notebook is the story of my

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Speaker 5: grandparents or the story of my parents, or I lost

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Speaker 5: my sister, you know, or I lost the love of

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Speaker 5: my life to cancer, or I was, you know, in

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Speaker 5: love with a girl and she left me because you know,

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Speaker 5: I was deployed too long, like happened in Dear John.

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Speaker 5: And so, you know, you get a lot more of

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Speaker 5: those kinds of stories. Then people coming up and say

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Speaker 5: I've ruined I've ruined men for them for the which

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Speaker 5: I'm glad. I would feel bad if that was more common.

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Speaker 2: Actually, no, that's what you come to Dear Chelsea for. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 2: to get upraided.

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Speaker 1: Okay, so how did you begin your Like, did you

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Speaker 1: set out wanting to become a romance novelist?

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Speaker 5: No? No, I was a I was a regular guy.

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Speaker 5: I was a good student, right, I was. Well, let's

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Speaker 5: see how far back I was regular suburban family, high

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Speaker 5: school valedictorian. I was also a pretty good runner. I

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Speaker 5: got a full scholarship to the University Notre Dame for

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Speaker 5: track and field. Broke the school record there still hold it,

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Speaker 5: by the way, after forty years.

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Speaker 2: Wow, no one's broken your record.

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Speaker 5: Not for forty years.

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Speaker 2: Oh wow, that's lucky.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, you know, they they've had the horse races, they

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Speaker 5: just haven't had the horses, right, That's what I like

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Speaker 5: to say. And let's see, I spent the first couple

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Speaker 5: of few years after graduation trying to figure out what

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Speaker 5: I wanted to do, and I was writing on the side.

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Speaker 5: I wrote a novel when I was nineteen and another

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Speaker 5: at twenty two.

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Speaker 2: Was it a romance novel at nineteen?

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Speaker 5: So first one was horror novel and the second one

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Speaker 5: was a murder mystery. Okay, so when we look at

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Speaker 5: remain right, a little supernatural little mystery. See goes right

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Speaker 5: back to my roots. Then I was selling pharmaceuticals, had

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Speaker 5: a midlife crisis about twenty seven years old. What am

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Speaker 5: I doing with my life? And I decided to give

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Speaker 5: writing another shot because those first novels had been unpublished,

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Speaker 5: and I wrote the notebook and here we are.

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Speaker 1: Oh god, well, let's talk about that, because I can't

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Speaker 1: tell you how many times we've had callers come in

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Speaker 1: that are working jobs that are dissatisfying and they want

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Speaker 1: to take a leap of faith and get into their

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Speaker 1: creative zone and do something like write a novel or

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Speaker 1: write a book, and they're always torn in betwixt in between.

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Speaker 1: So let's just talk about that moment in time for

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Speaker 1: you personally when you were a pharmaceutical wrap and how

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Speaker 1: you made the decision to just kind of take a

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Speaker 1: huge leap like that.

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Speaker 5: Oh well, you know, thank you for giving me way

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Speaker 5: more kudos than I deserve.

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Speaker 2: Well, you already pumped up your track record.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I'm just trying to support that, trying to

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Speaker 1: support the storytelling.

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Speaker 5: I'm really proud of that.

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Speaker 2: We're all proud of you right now.

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Speaker 5: So at that time, I was married, I had two kids,

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Speaker 5: and my second son was real young. He was months

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Speaker 5: old and he was not a good sleeper, so he

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Speaker 5: was up all night basically. So my wife at the time, Kathy,

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Speaker 5: she was going to bed very early, you know, maybe

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Speaker 5: eight o'clock because she wanted to get maybe three or

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Speaker 5: four hours because she knew she was going to be

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Speaker 5: awake the rest of the night. So I was kind

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Speaker 5: of alone. I would work my job during the day,

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Speaker 5: but then I have a choice, it's eight pm. I

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Speaker 5: can watch TV or chase a dream. I said, you know,

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Speaker 5: I'm going to chase a dream. Goes to TV and

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Speaker 5: on and then then I begin to write. So I

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Speaker 5: wrote that in the evenings and maybe one morning on

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Speaker 5: a weekend when the family hadn't yet decided what we're

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Speaker 5: all going to do, go to the beach or whatever.

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Speaker 5: And over a period of six months, while working, I

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Speaker 5: finished the novel. Now get this, I finished it. Then

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Speaker 5: I had to go do the agent thing and you know,

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Speaker 5: work with her and edit the book. And I sold

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Speaker 5: it in October nineteen ninety five, a year before came out.

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Speaker 5: Sold it for the advance was really big back then.

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Speaker 5: It's kind of big now. It was like a million dollars.

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Speaker 2: How did you get a million dollars for your first book?

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Speaker 5: Yeah? A million dollars for the first It was the notebook.

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Speaker 5: It's the notebook, I know.

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Speaker 2: But like, was there bidding war created? Like how did Yeah?

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Speaker 5: There was a yeah, everybody wanted it and there was

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Speaker 5: a bidding war. I get a million dollars and the

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Speaker 5: book doesn't come out for a year. But at that time, yes,

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Speaker 5: that's a great deal of money. But you know, when

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Speaker 5: I was pretty good in math, and I was a

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Speaker 5: business finance major, and you do the math, you're like, okay,

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Speaker 5: after agent, you know, fifteen percent, and.

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Speaker 1: Then you're saying an acquire yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I say.

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Speaker 5: And then I say Okay, I got enough to pay

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Speaker 5: off my very reasonable two hundred thousand dollars mortgage. I

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Speaker 5: have enough to put money away for my kids to

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Speaker 5: go to college. I got enough to maybe, you know,

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Speaker 5: put some in retirement. But that's about it. You know,

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Speaker 5: I'm twenty eight years old, and I'm going to have

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Speaker 5: to turn on the lights and eat food the rest

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Speaker 5: of my life. So I don't quit my job, and

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Speaker 5: I don't even tell anyone at work that I've just

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Speaker 5: basically won the lottery here. I worked for another year

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Speaker 5: until October nineteen ninety six. Now the book comes out,

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Speaker 5: and now I have to tell everybody because I'm on

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Speaker 5: you know, CBS this morning, and I'm in all the newspapers.

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Speaker 5: My boss finds out. So I did not quit until then.

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Speaker 5: I think the Notebook had been on the list for

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Speaker 5: fourteen weeks. It was February of ninety seven that I quit,

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Speaker 5: and I wasn't even willing to quit then, except Message

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Speaker 5: in a Bottle was going very well, and the publisher

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Speaker 5: had made an offer on that one, and it was

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Speaker 5: more than I earned for the Notebook, and I said, okay,

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Speaker 5: maybe I can make a living doing this, so way

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Speaker 5: less bravery than you give me credit for I kind

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Speaker 5: of played both sides. I guess.

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Speaker 1: So you were able to basically write two books while

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Speaker 1: you were working as a pharmaceutical rep.

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Speaker 7: Yeah.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I was about half done with Message in a

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Speaker 5: Bottle when it was sold. But yeah, I do.

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Speaker 4: Think that's such great advice, and it is what we've

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Speaker 4: told people in the past.

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Speaker 3: You don't have to like quit your job and then

387
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Speaker 3: go try to be an actor or whatever your thing is.

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Speaker 4: Keep doing what you can do while you're still like

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Speaker 4: keeping lights on.

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Speaker 5: Like you said, Well, and I had two children, right,

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Speaker 5: and my wife was not working at a time. We'd

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Speaker 5: made the joint decision that she would stay home when

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Speaker 5: the kids were little. So what was Yeah, it just

394
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Speaker 5: seemed like the logical choice. And you're writing a novel. Yeah,

395
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Speaker 5: it's a lot of work, and it's a challenge in

396
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Speaker 5: this and that. But depending on how long it is,

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Speaker 5: if you're not writing war and peace, you know, I mean,

398
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Speaker 5: it's reasonable Like when I sit down to write, I

399
00:19:07,920 --> 00:19:11,600
Speaker 5: try to write two thousand words. What typical novel is

400
00:19:11,960 --> 00:19:14,479
Speaker 5: one hundred thousand words, So it might take me, let's say,

401
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Speaker 5: one hundred and thirty thousand to get the one hundred

402
00:19:18,400 --> 00:19:21,439
Speaker 5: thousand that I keep right, Well, that's sixty five days

403
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Speaker 5: of writing over a three hundred and sixty five day year. Now,

404
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Speaker 5: even with a notebook, let's say the notebook wasn't even that.

405
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Speaker 5: The notebook I think was about fifty to sixty thousand words.

406
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Speaker 5: So even if I'm only writing it a thousand words

407
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Speaker 5: a day, of course I had time in the evenings. Right,

408
00:19:39,720 --> 00:19:42,320
Speaker 5: you crank out five hundred words or one thousand words.

409
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Speaker 5: Eventually the novel's going to get done. I think it's

410
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Speaker 5: more because I had written a couple of novels earlier

411
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Speaker 5: in life that were never published. I never went to

412
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Speaker 5: the keyboard and said to myself. There was never the

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Speaker 5: thought that I wasn't going to finish. There was the thought,

414
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Speaker 5: am I good? It was going to be any good?

415
00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:04,639
Speaker 5: Going to be terrible? There was thought there, but not

416
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Speaker 5: the thought that I wasn't going to finish. So hey

417
00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:08,960
Speaker 5: a little bit closer, Hey, a little bit closer.

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Speaker 1: Okay, Now a real question. Do you cry when you

419
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Speaker 1: watch your movies the books that have been made into movies.

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Speaker 1: Did you cry during the notebook?

421
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Speaker 5: Uh? Yeah, of course you got to cry. Yeah, right,

422
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Speaker 5: I don't think. Look, I'm not weeping and reaching for tissues.

423
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Speaker 5: But I get a little tearry, you know, I got

424
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Speaker 5: tiry at the Notebook musical too. I mean, they just

425
00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:30,840
Speaker 5: did such a beautiful job.

426
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Speaker 2: What about when you reread your material at times?

427
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Speaker 5: Sure, I'll get choked up sometimes sometimes, and and of

428
00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:40,080
Speaker 5: course I don't reread all the time. I'm not that vain,

429
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Speaker 5: but I'll pick up a book. You know, when you

430
00:20:42,200 --> 00:20:44,199
Speaker 5: first finish a novel, you don't want to see the

431
00:20:44,240 --> 00:20:48,199
Speaker 5: thing for about five years. You're you're it's just like

432
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Speaker 5: the worst friend ever here, he just abused you for

433
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Speaker 5: years and you're done with them, right, So you got

434
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Speaker 5: to give it some space.

435
00:20:55,320 --> 00:20:57,840
Speaker 1: Well, and nowadays, when you publish a book, it's like, okay,

436
00:20:57,880 --> 00:21:00,920
Speaker 1: you finish a book, it's a labor of love. Then

437
00:21:01,320 --> 00:21:03,400
Speaker 1: you know, you go through the editing process, which.

438
00:21:03,200 --> 00:21:05,000
Speaker 3: Is less creatively fulfilling.

439
00:21:05,119 --> 00:21:08,080
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, it's just kind of tedious, and I mean

440
00:21:08,119 --> 00:21:10,359
Speaker 1: it's important part of the process, but it's not like

441
00:21:10,440 --> 00:21:12,119
Speaker 1: I don't know why I'm acting like I'm from Canada

442
00:21:12,240 --> 00:21:15,199
Speaker 1: saying process. But anyway, it's an important part of it.

443
00:21:15,280 --> 00:21:18,200
Speaker 1: But it's also it's just not a fulfilling part. It's like, yeah,

444
00:21:18,240 --> 00:21:20,800
Speaker 1: I liked learning about language and set in structure and

445
00:21:20,840 --> 00:21:23,560
Speaker 1: making sure I'm using the right words and the most

446
00:21:23,560 --> 00:21:27,440
Speaker 1: powerful words when that's you know, appropriate. But also then

447
00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:29,840
Speaker 1: you get then the book is done. Then you have

448
00:21:29,880 --> 00:21:31,840
Speaker 1: to shoot the cover. Then you have to agree on

449
00:21:31,880 --> 00:21:35,000
Speaker 1: a cover. Then they send you ten thousand book slips.

450
00:21:35,040 --> 00:21:37,520
Speaker 1: Now this is the new thing where they send you

451
00:21:37,560 --> 00:21:39,840
Speaker 1: ten thousand bucks slips, which are the slips or the

452
00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:42,080
Speaker 1: first sheets that go into the book, and you have

453
00:21:42,160 --> 00:21:47,080
Speaker 1: to sign ten thousand fucking copies. And that really takes

454
00:21:47,119 --> 00:21:49,040
Speaker 1: the joy out of the entire process.

455
00:21:50,119 --> 00:21:51,200
Speaker 3: It gives you a carple tunnel.

456
00:21:51,480 --> 00:21:54,320
Speaker 5: Yeah, I've often joked about that. You know. People say,

457
00:21:54,600 --> 00:21:56,000
Speaker 5: they'll say what do you do? I say, I'm a

458
00:21:56,000 --> 00:21:58,600
Speaker 5: writer and they say, well, what do you write? I say, well,

459
00:21:59,359 --> 00:22:01,320
Speaker 5: mainly I write my name over and over.

460
00:22:01,240 --> 00:22:04,000
Speaker 2: Over and over and over again. Yeah. I just got

461
00:22:04,040 --> 00:22:04,240
Speaker 2: the e.

462
00:22:04,320 --> 00:22:05,439
Speaker 3: Schwab's new book.

463
00:22:05,680 --> 00:22:08,040
Speaker 4: She did The Invisible Life of Eddie LaRue, and she

464
00:22:08,119 --> 00:22:10,199
Speaker 4: did thirty thousand for her.

465
00:22:10,320 --> 00:22:11,160
Speaker 3: I'm like, that's too many.

466
00:22:11,240 --> 00:22:12,200
Speaker 2: Somebody needs too many.

467
00:22:12,320 --> 00:22:14,639
Speaker 1: Next time I threw my back out twice, it stagning

468
00:22:14,760 --> 00:22:17,200
Speaker 1: my last ten thousand batch of books. The next time

469
00:22:17,240 --> 00:22:19,760
Speaker 1: I write a book, I need to be suspended from

470
00:22:19,760 --> 00:22:22,560
Speaker 1: the ceiling, preferably a ceiling fan in some sort of

471
00:22:22,560 --> 00:22:24,359
Speaker 1: suspension gear where my back.

472
00:22:24,200 --> 00:22:26,440
Speaker 2: Is not the position in an awkward way.

473
00:22:26,480 --> 00:22:28,439
Speaker 1: So I could just go like this, because you know,

474
00:22:28,480 --> 00:22:30,679
Speaker 1: you could stamp them, but nobody wants to do that.

475
00:22:30,680 --> 00:22:32,720
Speaker 1: When you care about your readers, you want to, you know.

476
00:22:33,440 --> 00:22:35,960
Speaker 1: So I mean, it's not that your pigeon holed in

477
00:22:36,119 --> 00:22:38,960
Speaker 1: wrote like romance novels, but you've kind of sort of

478
00:22:39,000 --> 00:22:41,959
Speaker 1: like you've kind of chosen to write those books. Do

479
00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:45,680
Speaker 1: you feel at all like that's what you're supposed to write,

480
00:22:45,800 --> 00:22:49,720
Speaker 1: or do you feel pigeonholed in any way?

481
00:22:50,040 --> 00:22:52,480
Speaker 5: Look, I write because I want people to read them,

482
00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:56,080
Speaker 5: and look, I know what my readers have liked, and

483
00:22:56,119 --> 00:22:59,600
Speaker 5: so I try to write in kind of that. But

484
00:23:00,640 --> 00:23:04,320
Speaker 5: there's less pigeonholing than you'd think, because I try to

485
00:23:04,320 --> 00:23:07,560
Speaker 5: make each novel very different, even though we know the

486
00:23:07,600 --> 00:23:10,280
Speaker 5: ideas very simple. It's a love story. It's going to

487
00:23:10,280 --> 00:23:12,840
Speaker 5: be said in North Carolina. But other than that, I

488
00:23:12,880 --> 00:23:15,720
Speaker 5: want it to be as different as possible. So I'll

489
00:23:16,200 --> 00:23:18,639
Speaker 5: write some in first person, some in third person, some

490
00:23:18,720 --> 00:23:21,480
Speaker 5: in third person, limited omniscient. I'll do some with a

491
00:23:21,680 --> 00:23:24,359
Speaker 5: stories and b stories that collide in the end in

492
00:23:24,400 --> 00:23:27,160
Speaker 5: a way a reader don't expect. I'll do epic novels.

493
00:23:27,160 --> 00:23:29,639
Speaker 5: I'll do characters in their teens or their forties, or

494
00:23:29,880 --> 00:23:33,320
Speaker 5: characters in their eighties. I'll have happy endings, bittersweet endings,

495
00:23:33,400 --> 00:23:36,560
Speaker 5: and sad endings. I'll have tragedy and other forms. With

496
00:23:36,680 --> 00:23:39,960
Speaker 5: that said, I also vary the themes. So some might

497
00:23:39,960 --> 00:23:42,880
Speaker 5: be love and danger. The one remain here is love

498
00:23:42,880 --> 00:23:46,520
Speaker 5: and the supernatural. I've done love and mystery. So the

499
00:23:46,520 --> 00:23:49,600
Speaker 5: great thing when you're just really writing about human emotion

500
00:23:50,400 --> 00:23:54,119
Speaker 5: is I have a great ability to add the elements

501
00:23:54,160 --> 00:23:58,440
Speaker 5: of all kinds of different stories. Right, I've had I've

502
00:23:58,480 --> 00:24:02,000
Speaker 5: had soldiers in my knowledge. I've had mysteries in my novels.

503
00:24:02,040 --> 00:24:06,680
Speaker 5: I've had arsons, you know, in my novels. So all

504
00:24:06,760 --> 00:24:10,760
Speaker 5: sorts of different things. So while it is pigeonholing, yeah,

505
00:24:10,920 --> 00:24:14,119
Speaker 5: it's a love story in North Carolina. Aside from remain

506
00:24:14,240 --> 00:24:16,840
Speaker 5: which is said in Cape Cod, it's okay. What I

507
00:24:16,880 --> 00:24:19,119
Speaker 5: would tell people is, even though it's those two things,

508
00:24:19,760 --> 00:24:22,520
Speaker 5: it's different than anything else I've ever done. There's going

509
00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:25,120
Speaker 5: to be other themes you don't expect, and you won't

510
00:24:25,119 --> 00:24:27,960
Speaker 5: see the ending coming, and that's there's a lot of

511
00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:30,280
Speaker 5: a challenge in that, and I enjoy it.

512
00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:32,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, I think one of the key things

513
00:24:32,800 --> 00:24:35,760
Speaker 1: you said is instead of like, you know, your wife

514
00:24:35,800 --> 00:24:37,600
Speaker 1: goes to bed at eight eight pm, when you had

515
00:24:37,600 --> 00:24:41,120
Speaker 1: the little kids and you had a choice to sit

516
00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:44,960
Speaker 1: on the sofa and watch television or shut the TV

517
00:24:45,080 --> 00:24:48,280
Speaker 1: off and write a fucking book, And I think there

518
00:24:48,320 --> 00:24:50,240
Speaker 1: in lies your answer. You know you could be so,

519
00:24:50,359 --> 00:24:52,640
Speaker 1: I mean, I wrestled with this all the time. Yesterday

520
00:24:52,680 --> 00:24:55,400
Speaker 1: I was reading my friend's book Who's Coming on the podcast?

521
00:24:55,400 --> 00:24:57,480
Speaker 1: And I was like, I went to go turn on

522
00:24:57,520 --> 00:24:59,320
Speaker 1: the TV and the TV's weren't working. I'm in this

523
00:24:59,320 --> 00:25:01,520
Speaker 1: rental house, were working, the cable was down, And I

524
00:25:01,560 --> 00:25:02,760
Speaker 1: was like, oh, and.

525
00:25:02,680 --> 00:25:05,360
Speaker 2: Then, well I could possibly read a book, idiot.

526
00:25:05,680 --> 00:25:07,360
Speaker 1: So I went and I got the book and I

527
00:25:07,400 --> 00:25:09,320
Speaker 1: was read a chapter and then I saw the TV's

528
00:25:09,359 --> 00:25:12,280
Speaker 1: come on, and I'm like, you have a choice right now.

529
00:25:12,840 --> 00:25:15,520
Speaker 1: You can either continue reading, which is better for your brain,

530
00:25:15,640 --> 00:25:18,520
Speaker 1: or be mine, you know, mindless, Like you know, watching

531
00:25:18,520 --> 00:25:20,600
Speaker 1: TV can be so numbing, and you know it's very

532
00:25:20,720 --> 00:25:23,240
Speaker 1: rare that there is an incredible show out there. Now,

533
00:25:23,280 --> 00:25:24,760
Speaker 1: I mean, there's a lot of shows out there, but

534
00:25:24,880 --> 00:25:26,960
Speaker 1: to get a really good one. So but I think

535
00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:28,760
Speaker 1: therein lies the difference. You do have to make it

536
00:25:28,800 --> 00:25:31,880
Speaker 1: the choice to do the work. You know, in order

537
00:25:31,960 --> 00:25:34,199
Speaker 1: to take the chance to try something new, you have

538
00:25:34,240 --> 00:25:35,119
Speaker 1: to put the effort in.

539
00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:37,800
Speaker 5: Yeah, and of course these days you also have to

540
00:25:37,800 --> 00:25:40,840
Speaker 5: put down the phone. Yeah, right, I think people. I

541
00:25:40,840 --> 00:25:43,520
Speaker 5: think some people might spend more time in front of

542
00:25:43,560 --> 00:25:46,880
Speaker 5: a screen than a TV screen. I don't know, I'm

543
00:25:46,960 --> 00:25:50,840
Speaker 5: not it seems like it, especially, so you have to

544
00:25:50,880 --> 00:25:53,200
Speaker 5: now put two things down, I guess to chase it.

545
00:25:53,400 --> 00:25:55,840
Speaker 2: How do you manage your phone, Nicholas.

546
00:25:56,160 --> 00:25:58,439
Speaker 5: Oh, it's not a big deal, you know, once you

547
00:25:58,480 --> 00:26:01,679
Speaker 5: get into look fart around on my phone, just like

548
00:26:01,760 --> 00:26:05,480
Speaker 5: everybody does. But I probably you know, I work out

549
00:26:05,520 --> 00:26:08,800
Speaker 5: a couple hours a day. I probably read two or

550
00:26:08,840 --> 00:26:11,840
Speaker 5: three hours a day. I work five or six hours

551
00:26:11,840 --> 00:26:14,320
Speaker 5: a day. And I know I'm on the phone talking

552
00:26:14,320 --> 00:26:17,120
Speaker 5: to friends and visiting with friends. Not every day. I'm

553
00:26:17,119 --> 00:26:20,520
Speaker 5: not that social, but yeah, enough in the in the

554
00:26:20,520 --> 00:26:23,920
Speaker 5: course of a week. So and then you know you're

555
00:26:23,960 --> 00:26:26,000
Speaker 5: sleeping and you're on your phone the rest of the time,

556
00:26:26,200 --> 00:26:28,720
Speaker 5: usually playing games. I'm a big backgammon. Nut. So I

557
00:26:28,760 --> 00:26:29,320
Speaker 5: play a lot of.

558
00:26:29,320 --> 00:26:31,760
Speaker 1: Backgamming, okay, And so do you write five to six

559
00:26:31,800 --> 00:26:32,440
Speaker 1: hours a day?

560
00:26:32,480 --> 00:26:33,240
Speaker 2: Is that what you said?

561
00:26:33,760 --> 00:26:33,960
Speaker 6: Yeah?

562
00:26:33,960 --> 00:26:36,679
Speaker 5: Thinks about five on days that I write, but I

563
00:26:36,680 --> 00:26:37,640
Speaker 5: don't write every day.

564
00:26:37,680 --> 00:26:38,919
Speaker 2: Do you write first thing in the morning.

565
00:26:40,359 --> 00:26:43,200
Speaker 5: I write after coffee and after my workout.

566
00:26:43,359 --> 00:26:44,800
Speaker 2: Oh okay. Interesting.

567
00:26:45,200 --> 00:26:47,159
Speaker 1: We talked to a Mitch Album last week and he

568
00:26:47,240 --> 00:26:49,640
Speaker 1: writes first thing in the morning. And I was telling

569
00:26:49,720 --> 00:26:52,040
Speaker 1: him about this book that I had picked up years

570
00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:54,560
Speaker 1: ago called Daily Rituals, which talks about all these famous

571
00:26:54,640 --> 00:26:58,560
Speaker 1: kind of authors, physicists, philosophers and what their kind of

572
00:26:58,920 --> 00:27:02,240
Speaker 1: work ethics are were, and a lot of them just

573
00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:04,120
Speaker 1: get up, you know, five in the morning, and they

574
00:27:04,160 --> 00:27:06,600
Speaker 1: work for three hours and then they're done for the

575
00:27:06,680 --> 00:27:09,560
Speaker 1: rest of the day. Their creative juice is pretty much there,

576
00:27:09,600 --> 00:27:11,400
Speaker 1: just first thing in the morning. That's I'm a first

577
00:27:11,400 --> 00:27:13,000
Speaker 1: thing in the morning kind of person. That's when I

578
00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:14,080
Speaker 1: get my best shit done.

579
00:27:14,480 --> 00:27:14,640
Speaker 6: Well.

580
00:27:14,800 --> 00:27:17,960
Speaker 5: I'm an early riser. I'm usually up about four thirty

581
00:27:18,040 --> 00:27:20,800
Speaker 5: or five most morning, but I can't start my day

582
00:27:20,880 --> 00:27:24,080
Speaker 5: without coffee, and I like to. I like to get

583
00:27:24,080 --> 00:27:26,119
Speaker 5: my prayers in and get my dog out because I

584
00:27:26,280 --> 00:27:30,080
Speaker 5: like my dog too, and then I like to exercise,

585
00:27:30,359 --> 00:27:32,560
Speaker 5: you know, I mean, I just I know, if I'm

586
00:27:32,560 --> 00:27:35,920
Speaker 5: not after i'm done writing, I'm too tired to exercise.

587
00:27:36,119 --> 00:27:37,719
Speaker 5: So I got to write first. Yeah, and you know,

588
00:27:37,760 --> 00:27:39,480
Speaker 5: so I'm usually in the you know, in front of

589
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:42,920
Speaker 5: the computer, not late about nine, and it's not five

590
00:27:43,040 --> 00:27:46,960
Speaker 5: or six hours, usually three to five. Today I think

591
00:27:46,960 --> 00:27:50,480
Speaker 5: it was like three. It really depends. Again, I don't

592
00:27:50,480 --> 00:27:52,920
Speaker 5: write every day. Some days I edit, and some days

593
00:27:52,920 --> 00:27:55,439
Speaker 5: I'm just trying to figure out what I'm supposed to

594
00:27:55,480 --> 00:27:58,960
Speaker 5: do next. So and that it's not a faucet that

595
00:27:59,000 --> 00:28:01,480
Speaker 5: you can turn on. I say with my way of

596
00:28:01,520 --> 00:28:04,280
Speaker 5: describing writing a novel is you have to know what

597
00:28:04,359 --> 00:28:06,879
Speaker 5: to write. That's part of it, and then you have

598
00:28:06,920 --> 00:28:09,159
Speaker 5: to know how to write it. Now, if you know

599
00:28:09,280 --> 00:28:12,840
Speaker 5: what you're doing the how, you can always get through that.

600
00:28:12,880 --> 00:28:14,840
Speaker 5: It may take more or less time than you think.

601
00:28:15,119 --> 00:28:18,600
Speaker 5: But if you don't know what to do, man, there's

602
00:28:18,640 --> 00:28:20,960
Speaker 5: no reason to put any words down at all. I

603
00:28:20,960 --> 00:28:23,679
Speaker 5: think I spent three or four days trying to figure

604
00:28:23,680 --> 00:28:27,240
Speaker 5: out what the next five hundred or seven hundred words

605
00:28:27,240 --> 00:28:31,000
Speaker 5: were in this novel, and didn't do anything for three

606
00:28:31,080 --> 00:28:35,240
Speaker 5: days or four days, and boom seven hundred words came

607
00:28:35,280 --> 00:28:38,440
Speaker 5: in like twenty minutes. I'm like, literally, I'm like, this

608
00:28:38,480 --> 00:28:40,520
Speaker 5: is ridiculous. I wish I could turn it on and

609
00:28:40,560 --> 00:28:43,200
Speaker 5: off like a faucet. But I don't understand that.

610
00:28:43,240 --> 00:28:44,920
Speaker 1: You're saying, the idea has to come to you and

611
00:28:44,960 --> 00:28:46,160
Speaker 1: then you can put it to paper.

612
00:28:46,240 --> 00:28:47,280
Speaker 2: You have to have a direction.

613
00:28:47,400 --> 00:28:49,640
Speaker 5: Yeah, right, exactly if you don't know what you're writing

614
00:28:50,480 --> 00:28:54,600
Speaker 5: and what would work exactly best within all these other

615
00:28:54,680 --> 00:28:56,960
Speaker 5: ideas about what the novel is supposed to be, not

616
00:28:57,000 --> 00:29:00,920
Speaker 5: only what specific like how do I discribe this thing,

617
00:29:01,480 --> 00:29:06,000
Speaker 5: this particular passage of time without being repetitive or boring,

618
00:29:06,040 --> 00:29:07,920
Speaker 5: and knowing that I have to do this again in

619
00:29:07,960 --> 00:29:09,920
Speaker 5: a couple of chapters where I am going to have

620
00:29:09,920 --> 00:29:12,400
Speaker 5: to use this one way to do it, But what's

621
00:29:12,440 --> 00:29:14,400
Speaker 5: the other way to do it? And how can I

622
00:29:14,560 --> 00:29:17,200
Speaker 5: do it? And what's a new way and what's going

623
00:29:17,280 --> 00:29:20,680
Speaker 5: to be interesting and flow? I had no idea. I

624
00:29:20,680 --> 00:29:22,560
Speaker 5: had no idea. It took a little editing on what

625
00:29:22,640 --> 00:29:25,880
Speaker 5: I'd already written, and then okay, I was ready to

626
00:29:26,600 --> 00:29:28,920
Speaker 5: write the words and they just literally poured out.

627
00:29:29,480 --> 00:29:30,000
Speaker 2: I love it.

628
00:29:30,120 --> 00:29:32,640
Speaker 1: I love it as somebody who writes a lot of

629
00:29:32,760 --> 00:29:36,480
Speaker 1: romance novels. What is the most romantic gesture that you've

630
00:29:36,520 --> 00:29:43,320
Speaker 1: ever done for someone else, Oh, gosh.

631
00:29:41,360 --> 00:29:43,400
Speaker 2: Or one that's been done for you.

632
00:29:43,600 --> 00:29:47,520
Speaker 5: Yeah, you know. It's funny. When I was married, when

633
00:29:47,520 --> 00:29:52,360
Speaker 5: my Kathy liked at the time because we had children, right,

634
00:29:52,400 --> 00:29:53,800
Speaker 5: we had two, and then we had three more, so

635
00:29:53,840 --> 00:29:55,960
Speaker 5: we had five kids. So it was always a very

636
00:29:56,640 --> 00:30:03,160
Speaker 5: bustly busy house. And well, what she really most appreciated

637
00:30:03,240 --> 00:30:07,480
Speaker 5: were evenings off, like where she could just you take

638
00:30:07,520 --> 00:30:09,840
Speaker 5: care of the kids. I don't want to feed them

639
00:30:10,120 --> 00:30:12,640
Speaker 5: the whole bit, all the way into bed, you know,

640
00:30:12,720 --> 00:30:15,240
Speaker 5: do this one's soccer practice and do this with the others.

641
00:30:15,720 --> 00:30:18,320
Speaker 5: I just want to sit on the back porch for

642
00:30:18,360 --> 00:30:21,120
Speaker 5: a while. Then I want to take a long tub.

643
00:30:21,520 --> 00:30:23,280
Speaker 5: Then I want to go lay in bed and watch

644
00:30:23,360 --> 00:30:26,320
Speaker 5: brainless TV and then pass out. So I made a

645
00:30:26,320 --> 00:30:29,120
Speaker 5: point to do those those kinds. That's what she swore

646
00:30:29,240 --> 00:30:30,719
Speaker 5: she wanted more than anything.

647
00:30:30,800 --> 00:30:33,400
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that's real, real life romance.

648
00:30:33,640 --> 00:30:35,280
Speaker 5: And she told me that was romantic.

649
00:30:35,480 --> 00:30:39,520
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, no, no, no, I can appreciate that that's romantic.

650
00:30:39,640 --> 00:30:42,200
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm not interested in getting flowers from a

651
00:30:42,200 --> 00:30:44,840
Speaker 1: lover like I find actual traditional and I don't even

652
00:30:44,840 --> 00:30:48,360
Speaker 1: have children. But I find very traditional romantic things unnecessary.

653
00:30:48,400 --> 00:30:51,560
Speaker 1: It's really those deeper meaning, like very thoughtful gestures that

654
00:30:51,600 --> 00:30:54,560
Speaker 1: really actually make a difference in everybody's lives.

655
00:30:54,600 --> 00:30:57,440
Speaker 2: When you really know somebody and what they need. That's

656
00:30:57,520 --> 00:30:59,200
Speaker 2: real love and romance.

657
00:30:59,400 --> 00:31:00,840
Speaker 1: Okay, we're going to take a break and we're going

658
00:31:00,880 --> 00:31:02,600
Speaker 1: to be right back with Nicholas Sparks.

659
00:31:06,560 --> 00:31:09,400
Speaker 2: And we're already back with Nicholas Sparks. How quick was that?

660
00:31:10,080 --> 00:31:16,040
Speaker 5: You know? The wonders of technology, they never ceased to amaze. Yeah,

661
00:31:16,320 --> 00:31:16,800
Speaker 5: I love it.

662
00:31:16,880 --> 00:31:19,320
Speaker 1: Whoever came up with Zoom, and whoever came up with

663
00:31:19,440 --> 00:31:22,560
Speaker 1: docu sign, and whoever came up with an airflyer. I need,

664
00:31:22,960 --> 00:31:25,800
Speaker 1: I need to personally thank all of those people because

665
00:31:25,840 --> 00:31:28,240
Speaker 1: those are three of the biggest game changers.

666
00:31:27,840 --> 00:31:29,719
Speaker 2: In my last in the last three years.

667
00:31:29,800 --> 00:31:31,320
Speaker 5: Yes, all right, what do you put in your air

668
00:31:31,360 --> 00:31:32,280
Speaker 5: fire with anything?

669
00:31:32,400 --> 00:31:36,320
Speaker 2: Everything? Everything? I can't cook, so I put anything in there.

670
00:31:36,720 --> 00:31:38,720
Speaker 5: Okay, I like that. I like that.

671
00:31:38,800 --> 00:31:39,560
Speaker 2: I have one of those.

672
00:31:39,680 --> 00:31:42,239
Speaker 1: It's like a toaster oven also airfire, so you can

673
00:31:42,280 --> 00:31:44,440
Speaker 1: turn it on toaster, you can turn it on air fryer.

674
00:31:44,880 --> 00:31:46,479
Speaker 2: I mean, I don't know how to change the settings.

675
00:31:46,560 --> 00:31:47,800
Speaker 2: So it's always on air fire.

676
00:31:49,680 --> 00:31:52,640
Speaker 5: I got well, air fires are great. They're especially great

677
00:31:52,640 --> 00:31:53,960
Speaker 5: when it comes to reheating things.

678
00:31:54,160 --> 00:31:57,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's usually what I'm doing anyway, which is and.

679
00:31:57,120 --> 00:31:59,720
Speaker 5: Literally that I will be using my air fryer tonight.

680
00:31:59,760 --> 00:32:00,320
Speaker 5: So I'm with you.

681
00:32:00,520 --> 00:32:02,640
Speaker 1: There's nothing better than seeing, like you know, if I

682
00:32:02,640 --> 00:32:05,120
Speaker 1: love salmon, I love chicken, like putting it in just

683
00:32:05,120 --> 00:32:07,440
Speaker 1: for two minutes and just hearing the sizzle to get

684
00:32:07,440 --> 00:32:10,720
Speaker 1: the crispiness. I'm like, oh my god, this is all

685
00:32:10,720 --> 00:32:12,360
Speaker 1: I've ever wanted was crispy food.

686
00:32:12,760 --> 00:32:14,440
Speaker 2: That's really my that's what I want.

687
00:32:14,640 --> 00:32:17,360
Speaker 5: Yeah, I agree, I agree. Amazing And yeah, I'm with

688
00:32:17,400 --> 00:32:20,080
Speaker 5: you on the others too. I like docu sign and

689
00:32:20,080 --> 00:32:23,400
Speaker 5: and Zoom. They're very they're very handy. I remember I

690
00:32:23,480 --> 00:32:26,000
Speaker 5: used to get a lot of contracts that I used

691
00:32:26,040 --> 00:32:30,720
Speaker 5: to have to sign. I'm published in like fifty different languages.

692
00:32:31,600 --> 00:32:33,480
Speaker 5: I mean, so for every book, you're getting this, and

693
00:32:33,520 --> 00:32:37,200
Speaker 5: then I mean I get I get that, X's this

694
00:32:37,320 --> 00:32:40,960
Speaker 5: thing you know, uh, you know, just filled with contracts

695
00:32:41,000 --> 00:32:43,520
Speaker 5: I have to sign. Yeah, now it's click click click.

696
00:32:43,560 --> 00:32:44,400
Speaker 5: I love it. It's great.

697
00:32:44,440 --> 00:32:47,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, docu sign is really the best, the best thing

698
00:32:47,160 --> 00:32:49,040
Speaker 1: that's ever happened. I mean not to have to sit

699
00:32:49,080 --> 00:32:51,760
Speaker 1: there with somebody with a notary and sign contracts.

700
00:32:51,800 --> 00:32:53,800
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh my god, fingerprints. I'm like, no.

701
00:32:54,320 --> 00:32:56,800
Speaker 1: And once you check into docus it's like a commercial

702
00:32:56,840 --> 00:32:59,959
Speaker 1: for DocuSign. Once you check into docuside and give them

703
00:33:00,120 --> 00:33:01,280
Speaker 1: your first signature, that's it.

704
00:33:01,280 --> 00:33:02,720
Speaker 3: It just does it.

705
00:33:02,880 --> 00:33:04,800
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh my god, I just want to like,

706
00:33:05,280 --> 00:33:08,320
Speaker 1: I want to perform for that person and some whatever

707
00:33:08,360 --> 00:33:09,200
Speaker 1: way they want.

708
00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:11,160
Speaker 3: Me to, and I will find the CEO of docu

709
00:33:11,200 --> 00:33:11,760
Speaker 3: sign and get you.

710
00:33:12,040 --> 00:33:14,160
Speaker 1: Thank you, Nicholas. This is a part of the show

711
00:33:14,160 --> 00:33:15,680
Speaker 1: where we take questions from callers.

712
00:33:15,720 --> 00:33:17,400
Speaker 2: Okay, great, okay.

713
00:33:17,240 --> 00:33:19,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, Well our first question comes from Keisha.

714
00:33:20,200 --> 00:33:23,680
Speaker 4: She says, Hi, Chelsea and Catherine and any other beautiful

715
00:33:23,680 --> 00:33:24,520
Speaker 4: folks who read this.

716
00:33:25,120 --> 00:33:25,640
Speaker 3: I'm a writer.

717
00:33:25,920 --> 00:33:30,800
Speaker 4: I'm actually sometimes part time, sometimes contract sometimes unpaid sometimes

718
00:33:30,840 --> 00:33:33,800
Speaker 4: for myself writer and have been for many years. I'm

719
00:33:33,840 --> 00:33:35,800
Speaker 4: in my thirties and make my money in a career

720
00:33:35,840 --> 00:33:39,160
Speaker 4: that's not writing. That said, my writing has been published

721
00:33:39,160 --> 00:33:41,320
Speaker 4: and I've been paid for my writing for over a decade.

722
00:33:41,360 --> 00:33:43,400
Speaker 3: Now here's what I want to get a read on.

723
00:33:43,720 --> 00:33:46,880
Speaker 4: Are any freelancers currently making it out there? Do you

724
00:33:46,920 --> 00:33:49,920
Speaker 4: really have to have a whole online persona read impressive

725
00:33:49,960 --> 00:33:53,320
Speaker 4: Instagram or TikTok to get traction. These days, the best

726
00:33:53,400 --> 00:33:56,200
Speaker 4: luck I've had to make a career ie money is

727
00:33:56,240 --> 00:34:00,000
Speaker 4: copywriting in my technical field subject matter. It's extremely sane

728
00:34:00,120 --> 00:34:02,080
Speaker 4: ties and I obviously can't put much of a stamp

729
00:34:02,080 --> 00:34:04,720
Speaker 4: on anything. Should I just be grateful I'm getting paid

730
00:34:04,720 --> 00:34:06,520
Speaker 4: to write at all? And why is this reading like

731
00:34:06,560 --> 00:34:07,400
Speaker 4: a diary entry?

732
00:34:07,840 --> 00:34:08,440
Speaker 3: Dear Chelsea.

733
00:34:08,560 --> 00:34:11,239
Speaker 4: I'm interested in thoughts and advice to advance my writing career,

734
00:34:11,320 --> 00:34:14,360
Speaker 4: or perhaps to redefine it very very best, Kisha. I

735
00:34:14,360 --> 00:34:17,120
Speaker 4: thought about making this anonymous, but isn't that empathetical to

736
00:34:17,160 --> 00:34:17,680
Speaker 4: my whole thing?

737
00:34:17,800 --> 00:34:20,960
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, you can't be anonymous, Kisha. But actually we

738
00:34:20,960 --> 00:34:23,680
Speaker 1: were just having this very conversation. This is our special guest.

739
00:34:23,760 --> 00:34:25,120
Speaker 1: Nicholas Sparks is here today.

740
00:34:25,560 --> 00:34:27,279
Speaker 6: Hi, Wow, nice to meet you.

741
00:34:27,680 --> 00:34:28,719
Speaker 2: Yeah, how are you?

742
00:34:29,280 --> 00:34:30,480
Speaker 6: He was just the person?

743
00:34:30,680 --> 00:34:33,879
Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly, Nicholas. Tell her what you were telling us?

744
00:34:34,040 --> 00:34:34,440
Speaker 2: Please?

745
00:34:35,200 --> 00:34:38,840
Speaker 5: Well, when I first began writing, I ended up writing

746
00:34:38,920 --> 00:34:42,960
Speaker 5: my novels in my spare time after work, usually in

747
00:34:43,000 --> 00:34:46,640
Speaker 5: the evening. I would write from eight o'clock to eleven

748
00:34:46,680 --> 00:34:49,920
Speaker 5: o'clock or maybe even midnight and then i'd work my

749
00:34:50,320 --> 00:34:52,480
Speaker 5: regular shift. I'd also write one day on the weekend.

750
00:34:52,480 --> 00:34:55,480
Speaker 5: I had a wife and I had two young children

751
00:34:55,520 --> 00:34:59,640
Speaker 5: at home, so and I really felt like writing was

752
00:34:59,640 --> 00:35:01,400
Speaker 5: important to me. I wanted to chase a dream, so

753
00:35:01,440 --> 00:35:04,520
Speaker 5: I made time for it. So I think if I

754
00:35:04,600 --> 00:35:08,000
Speaker 5: was you, I were to really start and really answer

755
00:35:08,120 --> 00:35:11,480
Speaker 5: the very first question is what kind of writing do

756
00:35:11,560 --> 00:35:14,560
Speaker 5: you want to do? Is it? Do you want to

757
00:35:14,600 --> 00:35:17,040
Speaker 5: be a novelist. Do you want to be one of

758
00:35:17,040 --> 00:35:21,000
Speaker 5: the people that, let's say, publishing houses call to write

759
00:35:21,360 --> 00:35:23,480
Speaker 5: a famous person's biography. Do you want to be a

760
00:35:23,760 --> 00:35:27,360
Speaker 5: you know, an anonymous biographer. Do you want to be

761
00:35:27,600 --> 00:35:33,240
Speaker 5: someone who publishes on substack and journalistic pieces? What kind

762
00:35:33,520 --> 00:35:36,560
Speaker 5: of writer do you want to be? And I think

763
00:35:36,880 --> 00:35:41,839
Speaker 5: until you're clear about exactly the kind that you want

764
00:35:41,880 --> 00:35:46,560
Speaker 5: to be, you're probably just better doing what you're doing

765
00:35:46,840 --> 00:35:51,680
Speaker 5: and mastering the skills that you're developing, because, as you said,

766
00:35:51,760 --> 00:35:53,759
Speaker 5: you know, you do some copy this, you do some

767
00:35:53,800 --> 00:35:56,560
Speaker 5: writing on your own, you do some writing that gets published,

768
00:35:56,920 --> 00:35:59,600
Speaker 5: and that's all great. All of writing is a skill

769
00:35:59,800 --> 00:36:02,560
Speaker 5: and you do need to practice it. And it's wonderful

770
00:36:02,600 --> 00:36:04,600
Speaker 5: that not only do you get paid a little bit

771
00:36:04,719 --> 00:36:07,800
Speaker 5: to do it, but you also make time to write

772
00:36:08,520 --> 00:36:12,360
Speaker 5: what you want to write. So once you decide then

773
00:36:13,040 --> 00:36:15,600
Speaker 5: what you want to write, then you have to break

774
00:36:15,640 --> 00:36:18,480
Speaker 5: it down further. Can I ask what your dream writing

775
00:36:18,600 --> 00:36:23,560
Speaker 5: thing would be? Screenplays, novels, nonfiction? You know, what are

776
00:36:23,600 --> 00:36:24,080
Speaker 5: you thinking?

777
00:36:24,400 --> 00:36:26,880
Speaker 7: What I've really enjoyed that I've actually been able to

778
00:36:26,880 --> 00:36:30,400
Speaker 7: do has been some short stories, some short format fiction.

779
00:36:31,200 --> 00:36:36,120
Speaker 7: The problem is obviously, like short format as a medium

780
00:36:36,239 --> 00:36:39,719
Speaker 7: is kind of shrinking. We'll see how that goes. But

781
00:36:39,800 --> 00:36:42,320
Speaker 7: I have actually really enjoyed that. I kind of like

782
00:36:42,400 --> 00:36:46,120
Speaker 7: those sort of pernal storytelling. It's very powerful to me,

783
00:36:46,160 --> 00:36:49,240
Speaker 7: it's very fun. I do have like half a novel

784
00:36:49,920 --> 00:36:54,360
Speaker 7: geared towards adults that I actually found not that fun.

785
00:36:55,120 --> 00:36:56,440
Speaker 6: And then there's like some.

786
00:36:56,520 --> 00:37:01,279
Speaker 7: A little bit longer, maybe middle children age books that

787
00:37:01,360 --> 00:37:01,560
Speaker 7: I have.

788
00:37:01,640 --> 00:37:02,560
Speaker 6: Been really getting into.

789
00:37:02,760 --> 00:37:04,960
Speaker 7: Okay, I have a little kid now, and now I'm

790
00:37:05,000 --> 00:37:07,440
Speaker 7: thinking about like sort of stories that I sort of

791
00:37:07,440 --> 00:37:09,879
Speaker 7: tell her, and like how would that change when she's

792
00:37:09,920 --> 00:37:11,960
Speaker 7: like in the second or third or fourth grade, and

793
00:37:12,000 --> 00:37:14,080
Speaker 7: how fun that would be. And I'm actually really enjoying

794
00:37:14,120 --> 00:37:17,320
Speaker 7: sort of plotting that out. And I'm a warning person,

795
00:37:17,360 --> 00:37:19,040
Speaker 7: so I like, what you're saying about you would carve

796
00:37:19,080 --> 00:37:20,200
Speaker 7: out your time in the evenings.

797
00:37:20,600 --> 00:37:22,879
Speaker 6: Honey, I'm in bed. But what I do do, and.

798
00:37:22,840 --> 00:37:24,640
Speaker 7: I love that you said that, is I do tend

799
00:37:24,680 --> 00:37:26,759
Speaker 7: to get up around four thirty or five nowadays, and

800
00:37:26,800 --> 00:37:27,520
Speaker 7: everybody else.

801
00:37:27,400 --> 00:37:28,719
Speaker 6: Is a sleep till seven. Yeah.

802
00:37:29,000 --> 00:37:31,600
Speaker 7: Yeah, I think I should make more of an effort

803
00:37:31,680 --> 00:37:32,319
Speaker 7: to protect that.

804
00:37:32,920 --> 00:37:33,080
Speaker 6: Right.

805
00:37:33,160 --> 00:37:36,880
Speaker 5: Sure, that's a great thing, and you're right. Short story

806
00:37:37,000 --> 00:37:40,520
Speaker 5: fiction is really tough these days, but it's been tough

807
00:37:40,520 --> 00:37:44,200
Speaker 5: for probably twenty or thirty years. With that said, you know,

808
00:37:44,640 --> 00:37:48,600
Speaker 5: it's a wonderful way to develop your storytelling ability. What

809
00:37:48,640 --> 00:37:51,600
Speaker 5: you might consider is maybe taking and this is an idea,

810
00:37:51,680 --> 00:37:54,279
Speaker 5: and feel free to throw this out because it's not good.

811
00:37:54,560 --> 00:37:56,520
Speaker 5: But you know, you think of some of these ideas

812
00:37:56,560 --> 00:37:58,880
Speaker 5: that you're thinking about for your daughter maybe in second

813
00:37:58,920 --> 00:38:03,280
Speaker 5: or third grade, and fairy tales or whatever, whatever adventure

814
00:38:03,360 --> 00:38:06,400
Speaker 5: tale or a mystery tale. Right, what if you actually

815
00:38:06,440 --> 00:38:10,000
Speaker 5: compile those and it's you're not trying to just publish

816
00:38:10,280 --> 00:38:14,799
Speaker 5: one story in an offbeat magazine, but you eventually try

817
00:38:14,840 --> 00:38:19,200
Speaker 5: to publish those stories as as a collection and anthology

818
00:38:19,440 --> 00:38:22,600
Speaker 5: or another option is to perhaps and you don't have

819
00:38:22,640 --> 00:38:25,279
Speaker 5: to take these ideas is perhaps if you so much

820
00:38:25,400 --> 00:38:28,239
Speaker 5: enjoy short story fiction, think of a broad story with

821
00:38:28,480 --> 00:38:33,319
Speaker 5: multiple characters and somehow tell a dozen short stories that

822
00:38:33,400 --> 00:38:35,520
Speaker 5: all come together at.

823
00:38:35,360 --> 00:38:36,319
Speaker 6: The love that.

824
00:38:37,000 --> 00:38:39,920
Speaker 5: So there's different ways you can chase your dream. But

825
00:38:40,040 --> 00:38:42,800
Speaker 5: of course, you know, we only have so much time.

826
00:38:42,880 --> 00:38:46,600
Speaker 5: And good for you for really developing your skill.

827
00:38:47,040 --> 00:38:49,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, I think that's great advice.

828
00:38:49,120 --> 00:38:50,719
Speaker 1: I was going to say one of those things, not

829
00:38:50,760 --> 00:38:52,680
Speaker 1: the second one, which is even better advice than the

830
00:38:52,680 --> 00:38:55,000
Speaker 1: first one. I mean, you can combine all of those

831
00:38:55,040 --> 00:38:57,279
Speaker 1: stories and I mean make that a big book, or

832
00:38:57,320 --> 00:38:59,600
Speaker 1: you can make one, you know, all of these stories

833
00:38:59,600 --> 00:39:02,160
Speaker 1: within one big book, but you could have a book

834
00:39:02,160 --> 00:39:05,600
Speaker 1: of short stories, you know those those are still relevant.

835
00:39:05,800 --> 00:39:09,080
Speaker 1: And also just like I had this conversation with a

836
00:39:09,120 --> 00:39:11,680
Speaker 1: group of women from like Silicon Valley last night. We

837
00:39:11,719 --> 00:39:14,520
Speaker 1: had a tech kind of meeting, and it's kind of like,

838
00:39:15,239 --> 00:39:18,799
Speaker 1: don't let I hate letting like the market dictate what

839
00:39:18,960 --> 00:39:21,399
Speaker 1: you're going to bring to it. Like, you know, when

840
00:39:21,400 --> 00:39:23,799
Speaker 1: you have a talent and you have a desire, do

841
00:39:23,880 --> 00:39:26,520
Speaker 1: what you love to do and bring it to the marketplace.

842
00:39:26,920 --> 00:39:30,879
Speaker 1: Don't let whatever's popular or not popular dictate what you're

843
00:39:30,920 --> 00:39:33,040
Speaker 1: going to do in your spare time. You have the

844
00:39:33,080 --> 00:39:35,480
Speaker 1: spare time, that's the first thing you need. You have

845
00:39:35,600 --> 00:39:38,040
Speaker 1: the time in the morning, as you already mentioned, just

846
00:39:38,320 --> 00:39:41,600
Speaker 1: use that time, like dedicate that time to really focusing

847
00:39:41,600 --> 00:39:44,759
Speaker 1: on one of those two options that Nick mentioned. And

848
00:39:44,840 --> 00:39:46,560
Speaker 1: I think, you know, like in a couple of months,

849
00:39:46,600 --> 00:39:48,560
Speaker 1: you're going to be farther down the road. Listen, children's

850
00:39:48,560 --> 00:39:50,840
Speaker 1: books are always going to be viable. They're always going

851
00:39:50,920 --> 00:39:53,800
Speaker 1: to be a selling People always want a nice parable

852
00:39:53,960 --> 00:39:56,600
Speaker 1: or an adventure series. You know, that's something you can

853
00:39:56,680 --> 00:39:59,400
Speaker 1: make more and more out of in success. You know,

854
00:39:59,480 --> 00:40:03,000
Speaker 1: remember Ramona, what was her name, Ramona? Those are the

855
00:40:03,040 --> 00:40:06,960
Speaker 1: book yeah, other than Judy Bloom, like Ramona and yeah,

856
00:40:07,400 --> 00:40:09,440
Speaker 1: the cat ate my jumpsuit was Judy Bloom. But then

857
00:40:09,440 --> 00:40:11,600
Speaker 1: there was another series with Ramona who was always in

858
00:40:11,600 --> 00:40:14,040
Speaker 1: trouble and I love that. But like you know, when

859
00:40:14,040 --> 00:40:16,640
Speaker 1: you're thinking about children's stories, like that's that's something that's

860
00:40:16,719 --> 00:40:20,160
Speaker 1: kind of always has the potential to resonate. So it's

861
00:40:20,200 --> 00:40:22,719
Speaker 1: really about picking exactly like where you're going to put

862
00:40:22,719 --> 00:40:25,759
Speaker 1: your energy into and just giving yourself that time every

863
00:40:25,840 --> 00:40:26,799
Speaker 1: day and doing it.

864
00:40:27,320 --> 00:40:29,000
Speaker 7: Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. And I think

865
00:40:29,000 --> 00:40:31,839
Speaker 7: sometimes you see somebody to say like keep going, keep

866
00:40:31,880 --> 00:40:34,360
Speaker 7: doing it. And also the whole thing about you know,

867
00:40:34,400 --> 00:40:38,239
Speaker 7: building a platform. I think that's part of where it

868
00:40:38,280 --> 00:40:40,799
Speaker 7: does get a little bit rough, because it's like you're

869
00:40:40,880 --> 00:40:42,239
Speaker 7: kind of going to the marketplace.

870
00:40:42,640 --> 00:40:45,279
Speaker 6: You know, what's marketable? Am I marketed? Bull?

871
00:40:45,480 --> 00:40:48,440
Speaker 7: It's like part before the horse, and so that can

872
00:40:48,480 --> 00:40:52,560
Speaker 7: be pretty like kind of a bummer. But I like

873
00:40:52,640 --> 00:40:54,160
Speaker 7: that you guys are like, don't even think about that

874
00:40:54,239 --> 00:40:54,600
Speaker 7: right now.

875
00:40:54,800 --> 00:40:57,319
Speaker 1: Yeah, And also like don't make it a bummer making

876
00:40:57,360 --> 00:41:00,120
Speaker 1: an adventure, make it like okay, fun, Okay, I'm I'm

877
00:41:00,120 --> 00:41:01,520
Speaker 1: going to go online. I'm going to go on my

878
00:41:01,560 --> 00:41:03,920
Speaker 1: social media platform and ask people what would they like

879
00:41:04,000 --> 00:41:06,040
Speaker 1: the most. Would you like a short you know, would

880
00:41:06,080 --> 00:41:08,760
Speaker 1: you like a short story for your second or third grader?

881
00:41:09,080 --> 00:41:12,200
Speaker 1: A book about being a young person or a young child,

882
00:41:12,480 --> 00:41:14,480
Speaker 1: would you like you know, maybe you could get feedback

883
00:41:14,520 --> 00:41:17,600
Speaker 1: that way, you know, But don't be worried about the

884
00:41:18,040 --> 00:41:22,319
Speaker 1: response of anybody at this point. Just be worried about

885
00:41:22,360 --> 00:41:24,759
Speaker 1: moving towards your goal, because what you said in the

886
00:41:24,840 --> 00:41:27,359
Speaker 1: letter is like, should I be satisfied writing this kind

887
00:41:27,440 --> 00:41:31,759
Speaker 1: of sanitized stuff, Like no, you shouldn't be satisfied with that.

888
00:41:31,760 --> 00:41:34,000
Speaker 1: That's a way for you to make money, but you

889
00:41:34,040 --> 00:41:36,560
Speaker 1: should go after your dreams. Like we only have a

890
00:41:36,600 --> 00:41:39,280
Speaker 1: short time here, you might as well make them count

891
00:41:39,320 --> 00:41:39,680
Speaker 1: for you.

892
00:41:40,080 --> 00:41:42,520
Speaker 4: I forget where I heard this, but recently I read

893
00:41:42,560 --> 00:41:45,919
Speaker 4: something that said something along the lines of your desires

894
00:41:46,200 --> 00:41:49,480
Speaker 4: are what brings you towards your purpose, So like, don't

895
00:41:49,560 --> 00:41:51,319
Speaker 4: discount that you do want more than that.

896
00:41:51,719 --> 00:41:56,000
Speaker 7: And like mister smacks, it counts. It's a good experience.

897
00:41:56,080 --> 00:41:59,920
Speaker 7: Like I'm definitely learning self editing is a really.

898
00:41:59,719 --> 00:42:02,480
Speaker 6: Big yeah that I've learned a lot from copywriting.

899
00:42:02,719 --> 00:42:06,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, edit to amplify, edit to amplify.

900
00:42:06,320 --> 00:42:07,200
Speaker 6: Yeah, for sure.

901
00:42:07,960 --> 00:42:09,919
Speaker 7: It's also just hard, you know, you start to get

902
00:42:09,920 --> 00:42:11,799
Speaker 7: older and you start to think it all ties into

903
00:42:11,880 --> 00:42:14,680
Speaker 7: sort of like youth culture and tacking up these audience

904
00:42:14,760 --> 00:42:18,440
Speaker 7: numbers on these sort of arbitrary formats that maybe that's no.

905
00:42:18,440 --> 00:42:19,280
Speaker 2: But it doesn't matter.

906
00:42:19,400 --> 00:42:22,400
Speaker 1: But also on the subject of age, like that is

907
00:42:22,600 --> 00:42:25,160
Speaker 1: there's a million people that are your age. Who cares

908
00:42:25,200 --> 00:42:27,640
Speaker 1: about what young people are doing? Focus on the people

909
00:42:27,640 --> 00:42:31,000
Speaker 1: that you're going to be servicing. Focus on your group

910
00:42:31,040 --> 00:42:33,760
Speaker 1: of people. Don't worry about what people who are twenty

911
00:42:33,920 --> 00:42:35,120
Speaker 1: and thirty years old are doing.

912
00:42:35,160 --> 00:42:36,000
Speaker 2: That's not relevant.

913
00:42:36,040 --> 00:42:38,840
Speaker 1: To you, you know, so I just like, don't forget

914
00:42:38,880 --> 00:42:40,920
Speaker 1: there's a bunch of other people. It's not like you

915
00:42:40,960 --> 00:42:43,279
Speaker 1: have to be this new, young, fresh hot thing all

916
00:42:43,320 --> 00:42:45,680
Speaker 1: of the time. That's not real. That's just what we've

917
00:42:45,680 --> 00:42:48,879
Speaker 1: been served up. So just enjoy like where you are

918
00:42:48,920 --> 00:42:52,160
Speaker 1: in your life. Appreciate it. You have the passion and

919
00:42:52,200 --> 00:42:54,240
Speaker 1: now you just need the commitment and the drive.

920
00:42:54,680 --> 00:42:55,719
Speaker 6: I really appreciate that.

921
00:42:55,800 --> 00:42:58,279
Speaker 7: And you're a great testament to that of you're not

922
00:42:58,360 --> 00:43:01,600
Speaker 7: chasing anything you've own and developed sort of based on

923
00:43:01,640 --> 00:43:05,080
Speaker 7: your interests, and that's been really powerful to see.

924
00:43:05,360 --> 00:43:07,960
Speaker 2: Oh well, I love that. Thank you. Will you follow

925
00:43:08,000 --> 00:43:11,560
Speaker 2: up with us? Yes, keep us posted absolutely.

926
00:43:11,760 --> 00:43:13,799
Speaker 6: Thank y'all so much. I hope you have a good one.

927
00:43:14,600 --> 00:43:18,840
Speaker 1: Thank yousha good writing question for us for our special

928
00:43:18,880 --> 00:43:20,680
Speaker 1: guests today specially.

929
00:43:20,520 --> 00:43:22,920
Speaker 4: Well, this next question isn't about writing, but it is

930
00:43:22,920 --> 00:43:25,040
Speaker 4: about a family secret. And I feel like you are

931
00:43:25,040 --> 00:43:28,839
Speaker 4: someone who is a special a specialist in juicy secrets.

932
00:43:29,120 --> 00:43:32,120
Speaker 1: And fictional family special families unless you have some real

933
00:43:32,120 --> 00:43:33,799
Speaker 1: ones you want to smell necklaces.

934
00:43:35,320 --> 00:43:38,840
Speaker 4: Well, our next question comes from Lynn. She says, Dear Chelsea,

935
00:43:39,400 --> 00:43:42,120
Speaker 4: three and a half years ago, I rekindled my relationship

936
00:43:42,160 --> 00:43:44,840
Speaker 4: with my older sister without telling the rest of my family.

937
00:43:45,400 --> 00:43:47,080
Speaker 4: She was nine when I was born, and as a

938
00:43:47,080 --> 00:43:49,880
Speaker 4: little girl, I idolized her. My love of tied I

939
00:43:50,040 --> 00:43:52,280
Speaker 4: and the grateful dead comes straight from her. In the eighties,

940
00:43:52,840 --> 00:43:55,200
Speaker 4: when she was applying to colleges, there was a huge

941
00:43:55,280 --> 00:43:57,520
Speaker 4: fight between her and my parents. My parents told her

942
00:43:57,520 --> 00:43:59,520
Speaker 4: they couldn't afford to pay the tuition to the college

943
00:43:59,520 --> 00:44:02,480
Speaker 4: of her dream. There were some harsh words on both sides.

944
00:44:02,920 --> 00:44:05,239
Speaker 4: It destroyed their relationship and she cut herself off from

945
00:44:05,280 --> 00:44:08,960
Speaker 4: my family. Growing up, I asked questions about why I

946
00:44:09,000 --> 00:44:11,319
Speaker 4: no longer saw her, and basically was told it was

947
00:44:11,360 --> 00:44:14,720
Speaker 4: her choice to be so selfish. Years later, her husband

948
00:44:14,760 --> 00:44:16,480
Speaker 4: actually wrote me a letter and told me that she

949
00:44:16,520 --> 00:44:18,440
Speaker 4: missed me and would like to have a relationship with

950
00:44:18,560 --> 00:44:20,719
Speaker 4: just me. I hate to admit it, but at the

951
00:44:20,719 --> 00:44:22,520
Speaker 4: time I was not ready for that. I was still

952
00:44:22,560 --> 00:44:24,680
Speaker 4: under the impression that my dad was perfect, and I

953
00:44:24,760 --> 00:44:26,120
Speaker 4: told her as much when I called her.

954
00:44:26,280 --> 00:44:27,760
Speaker 3: I was awful and so hurtful.

955
00:44:28,560 --> 00:44:30,600
Speaker 4: After I had my own kids, though, it started to

956
00:44:30,680 --> 00:44:32,600
Speaker 4: dawn on me that parents are just doing the best

957
00:44:32,640 --> 00:44:34,920
Speaker 4: they can. In fact, I started thinking that it was

958
00:44:34,960 --> 00:44:36,680
Speaker 4: my parents who fucked up more than my sister.

959
00:44:36,920 --> 00:44:38,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, it sounds like it.

960
00:44:38,200 --> 00:44:38,800
Speaker 3: At eighteen.

961
00:44:38,920 --> 00:44:40,799
Speaker 4: She was a child when the rift happened, and it

962
00:44:40,840 --> 00:44:43,000
Speaker 4: all just made me so sad. I felt like I

963
00:44:43,040 --> 00:44:44,840
Speaker 4: was missing a piece for thirty years and I just

964
00:44:44,920 --> 00:44:47,200
Speaker 4: flat out missed my big sister. So I reached out

965
00:44:47,239 --> 00:44:50,480
Speaker 4: online and we agreed to meet. Over the last three years,

966
00:44:50,520 --> 00:44:52,560
Speaker 4: we have become so close again. We have a ton

967
00:44:52,600 --> 00:44:55,279
Speaker 4: of similarities beyond just how much we look alike. We're

968
00:44:55,320 --> 00:44:58,360
Speaker 4: both teachers, same political beliefs, we love cats over dogs,

969
00:44:58,400 --> 00:45:02,080
Speaker 4: even our mannerisms become part of each other's families. Here

970
00:45:02,200 --> 00:45:04,840
Speaker 4: is my problem. All of this has happened in secret.

971
00:45:04,840 --> 00:45:07,120
Speaker 4: On my side. I haven't told my parents our younger

972
00:45:07,160 --> 00:45:09,280
Speaker 4: sister that I have a relationship with my older sister,

973
00:45:09,680 --> 00:45:12,080
Speaker 4: And at first it was to protect the fragile relationship

974
00:45:12,120 --> 00:45:14,040
Speaker 4: I was trying to form, but now it's just out

975
00:45:14,040 --> 00:45:14,960
Speaker 4: of worry and guilt.

976
00:45:15,360 --> 00:45:16,680
Speaker 3: She wants nothing to do with my.

977
00:45:16,640 --> 00:45:19,319
Speaker 4: Parents or younger sister, and I worry about hurting my dad,

978
00:45:19,320 --> 00:45:21,879
Speaker 4: who is in the early stages of dementia. I would

979
00:45:21,960 --> 00:45:24,120
Speaker 4: keep this a secret forever, but now my kids have

980
00:45:24,200 --> 00:45:26,839
Speaker 4: formed a relationship with my older sister and her family too.

981
00:45:27,080 --> 00:45:29,359
Speaker 4: We're very close with my parents and my kids see

982
00:45:29,360 --> 00:45:31,960
Speaker 4: them every day. I feel awful having them lie to

983
00:45:32,000 --> 00:45:33,959
Speaker 4: my parents when we have plans with my older sister

984
00:45:34,000 --> 00:45:36,319
Speaker 4: and her family. I don't want my older sister to

985
00:45:36,320 --> 00:45:39,160
Speaker 4: be some guilty secret. Do I confess to my parents

986
00:45:39,160 --> 00:45:41,080
Speaker 4: and younger sister? And if so, how do I do

987
00:45:41,160 --> 00:45:42,719
Speaker 4: it in a way that's not going to hurt their

988
00:45:42,760 --> 00:45:45,400
Speaker 4: feelings since I've been hiding this from them for years?

989
00:45:45,640 --> 00:45:45,920
Speaker 2: Help?

990
00:45:46,040 --> 00:45:46,800
Speaker 5: Lynn?

991
00:45:47,160 --> 00:45:49,800
Speaker 2: Hi? This is Nicholas Sparks, our special guest today.

992
00:45:50,400 --> 00:45:53,040
Speaker 5: Hi, and yeah, do you want me to answer this question?

993
00:45:53,120 --> 00:45:56,320
Speaker 2: Would you like to go first? You're welcome to I don't.

994
00:45:57,280 --> 00:45:59,640
Speaker 5: I don't think I have the expertise to answer such

995
00:45:59,640 --> 00:46:02,279
Speaker 5: a question other than to say, you know, if you're

996
00:46:02,320 --> 00:46:05,080
Speaker 5: still close with your parents, I don't see how you

997
00:46:05,120 --> 00:46:07,880
Speaker 5: can continue to lie to them. Right what they do

998
00:46:08,000 --> 00:46:11,440
Speaker 5: with information is going to be up to them. They

999
00:46:11,520 --> 00:46:15,600
Speaker 5: might be reasonable, they might not be. But I certainly

1000
00:46:15,600 --> 00:46:18,480
Speaker 5: don't think it's good that your kids have now kind

1001
00:46:18,520 --> 00:46:21,040
Speaker 5: of got caught up into it. Not like they're lying

1002
00:46:21,080 --> 00:46:23,560
Speaker 5: to them, but when you're going to go see the

1003
00:46:23,600 --> 00:46:26,359
Speaker 5: sister and her family and they have to lie about that,

1004
00:46:26,880 --> 00:46:31,359
Speaker 5: I always kind of lead my life and I really do,

1005
00:46:31,719 --> 00:46:36,040
Speaker 5: and most everyone who's very close with me would agree

1006
00:46:36,080 --> 00:46:39,279
Speaker 5: with this is Look, this is who I am. I'd

1007
00:46:39,320 --> 00:46:42,879
Speaker 5: rather you know the real me and choose to have

1008
00:46:42,920 --> 00:46:46,279
Speaker 5: a relationship with me or like me or dislike me

1009
00:46:46,320 --> 00:46:51,240
Speaker 5: after this. But here's the real me, and I don't

1010
00:46:51,400 --> 00:46:55,600
Speaker 5: try to hide that. And I don't recall ever losing

1011
00:46:55,640 --> 00:47:00,480
Speaker 5: someone with that kind of honesty. That was an important

1012
00:47:00,520 --> 00:47:03,000
Speaker 5: to me. Now I don't know your parents, and they

1013
00:47:03,080 --> 00:47:06,759
Speaker 5: might be that kind, but I would say, you think

1014
00:47:06,800 --> 00:47:10,759
Speaker 5: you have a relationship with your parents, but they don't

1015
00:47:10,760 --> 00:47:13,279
Speaker 5: even know the real you. They have a relationship with

1016
00:47:13,280 --> 00:47:19,080
Speaker 5: a facade of you. And I'm older than you, so

1017
00:47:19,680 --> 00:47:24,120
Speaker 5: I yeah, I just don't really care anymore. What here

1018
00:47:24,160 --> 00:47:25,719
Speaker 5: I am? And if you don't like me, you don't

1019
00:47:25,760 --> 00:47:27,840
Speaker 5: want to talk to me any more. Okay, good on you.

1020
00:47:28,520 --> 00:47:29,960
Speaker 5: Wish you well, Lynne.

1021
00:47:29,960 --> 00:47:32,480
Speaker 1: Can I ask you this all happened because of college,

1022
00:47:33,000 --> 00:47:35,000
Speaker 1: because she was they had a disagreement over where she

1023
00:47:35,080 --> 00:47:38,080
Speaker 1: was going to go to college. Yeah, are your parents

1024
00:47:38,239 --> 00:47:39,879
Speaker 1: religious or something like?

1025
00:47:40,120 --> 00:47:40,399
Speaker 2: Is there?

1026
00:47:41,000 --> 00:47:43,319
Speaker 3: I just can't believe, like an un blow up?

1027
00:47:43,440 --> 00:47:45,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, one blow up and they're so close with the

1028
00:47:45,960 --> 00:47:46,680
Speaker 1: rest of the family.

1029
00:47:46,719 --> 00:47:47,839
Speaker 2: And they just extricate it.

1030
00:47:47,840 --> 00:47:50,680
Speaker 1: She was like ostracized from the family for the rest

1031
00:47:50,680 --> 00:47:51,160
Speaker 1: of her life.

1032
00:47:51,680 --> 00:47:54,040
Speaker 8: So it wasn't that she was well, I mean, I

1033
00:47:54,040 --> 00:47:57,360
Speaker 8: guess she was kind of ostracized. So now I was nine,

1034
00:47:57,560 --> 00:48:00,880
Speaker 8: so this is Yeah, I've piecemealed it back together a

1035
00:48:00,920 --> 00:48:02,480
Speaker 8: little bit and we've talked a little bit about it,

1036
00:48:02,520 --> 00:48:04,799
Speaker 8: but we've just tried to kind of move on. That

1037
00:48:05,000 --> 00:48:10,000
Speaker 8: was I guess the biggest argument that set her over

1038
00:48:10,040 --> 00:48:13,240
Speaker 8: the edge, to be like, you don't even care about

1039
00:48:13,640 --> 00:48:16,239
Speaker 8: me going to college. Therefore I'm going to do what

1040
00:48:16,400 --> 00:48:19,239
Speaker 8: I want to do and i want nothing to do

1041
00:48:19,320 --> 00:48:23,840
Speaker 8: with you. So she removed herself from the relationship, and

1042
00:48:24,320 --> 00:48:27,560
Speaker 8: my parents just basically pretended she never existed after that,

1043
00:48:28,080 --> 00:48:30,960
Speaker 8: as did the rest of my dad's side of the family.

1044
00:48:31,280 --> 00:48:34,359
Speaker 1: Yeah, I would just I mean, honestly, it's really that's

1045
00:48:34,440 --> 00:48:36,920
Speaker 1: it's not your problem. You're you're the fact that you

1046
00:48:36,960 --> 00:48:40,440
Speaker 1: reconnected with your sister is beautiful and that's exactly what

1047
00:48:40,480 --> 00:48:42,719
Speaker 1: you should do, and you should probably encourage your younger

1048
00:48:42,760 --> 00:48:45,560
Speaker 1: sister to reconnect with your sister too, because anybody who

1049
00:48:45,560 --> 00:48:48,480
Speaker 1: can write their own child off at eighteen years old,

1050
00:48:48,719 --> 00:48:51,960
Speaker 1: is that's not right, you know, and I mean, obviously

1051
00:48:52,360 --> 00:48:54,279
Speaker 1: that sounds like I'm passing judgment on your parents, But

1052
00:48:54,360 --> 00:48:55,000
Speaker 1: like I.

1053
00:48:54,960 --> 00:48:57,320
Speaker 2: Agree with Nick, Like you want to be upfront.

1054
00:48:57,360 --> 00:48:59,640
Speaker 1: There's nothing wrong with what you're doing reconnecting with one

1055
00:48:59,640 --> 00:49:01,439
Speaker 1: of your face family members who was kind of taken

1056
00:49:01,480 --> 00:49:03,080
Speaker 1: out of your life as a nine year old kid.

1057
00:49:03,280 --> 00:49:05,239
Speaker 1: I lost my brother at nine, Like, it's not the

1058
00:49:05,280 --> 00:49:08,000
Speaker 1: same circumstance, but I would do anything to be able

1059
00:49:08,080 --> 00:49:10,319
Speaker 1: to reconnect with him, to be able to have a

1060
00:49:10,400 --> 00:49:13,120
Speaker 1: conversation with him, you know, Like, of course, that's a

1061
00:49:13,200 --> 00:49:16,480
Speaker 1: natural instinct, that's a natural way for a human being

1062
00:49:16,520 --> 00:49:20,479
Speaker 1: to relate to another person in your family and your Yeah,

1063
00:49:20,560 --> 00:49:22,720
Speaker 1: your father is in the beginning stages of dementia.

1064
00:49:22,800 --> 00:49:23,640
Speaker 2: That's unfortunate.

1065
00:49:23,880 --> 00:49:27,160
Speaker 1: But it's also not your responsibility to take care of

1066
00:49:27,200 --> 00:49:30,319
Speaker 1: your parents' feelings. You're an adult who has children that

1067
00:49:30,400 --> 00:49:32,880
Speaker 1: you want to set an example for, right.

1068
00:49:33,160 --> 00:49:34,280
Speaker 2: I completely agree.

1069
00:49:34,480 --> 00:49:39,200
Speaker 8: So I have intentions of telling my parents, Like, I

1070
00:49:39,239 --> 00:49:40,880
Speaker 8: feel bad that I've waited.

1071
00:49:40,760 --> 00:49:42,040
Speaker 2: Four years to tell them.

1072
00:49:42,400 --> 00:49:43,880
Speaker 8: I'm just trying to figure out at this point how

1073
00:49:43,960 --> 00:49:46,920
Speaker 8: to do it without a feeling like a bomb.

1074
00:49:48,200 --> 00:49:52,080
Speaker 5: I have an idea. Okay, it's the best way. Go over,

1075
00:49:52,120 --> 00:49:55,120
Speaker 5: have a nice stay with them, and then when there's

1076
00:49:55,160 --> 00:49:57,759
Speaker 5: ten minutes to go until you have to leave, send

1077
00:49:57,760 --> 00:50:00,880
Speaker 5: the kids the caar, talk to them. You'll give them

1078
00:50:00,920 --> 00:50:03,000
Speaker 5: a hug, say oh before I go, you should really

1079
00:50:03,040 --> 00:50:05,439
Speaker 5: know this. Tell them. Then go get in the car.

1080
00:50:06,000 --> 00:50:10,240
Speaker 5: Let those two deal with it without you having to

1081
00:50:10,280 --> 00:50:15,759
Speaker 5: see their reaction. Okay, and then call, you know, a

1082
00:50:15,760 --> 00:50:19,120
Speaker 5: couple of days or whatever your date your call schedule is,

1083
00:50:19,200 --> 00:50:21,080
Speaker 5: say hey, hey mom, hey dad, how you doing or

1084
00:50:21,160 --> 00:50:27,000
Speaker 5: whatever you do? That's what I would do. Yeah, and say, okay,

1085
00:50:27,000 --> 00:50:29,600
Speaker 5: we're going to talk about this for the next three hours. No, No,

1086
00:50:29,680 --> 00:50:31,720
Speaker 5: this is more of a you're not doing anything wrong.

1087
00:50:32,080 --> 00:50:35,319
Speaker 5: You tell them, and then you let those two deal

1088
00:50:35,360 --> 00:50:35,680
Speaker 5: with it.

1089
00:50:36,000 --> 00:50:36,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's great.

1090
00:50:37,239 --> 00:50:39,120
Speaker 4: I also think some of the guilt of this is

1091
00:50:39,160 --> 00:50:41,600
Speaker 4: coming from like how long it's been. I think get

1092
00:50:41,640 --> 00:50:42,880
Speaker 4: nebulous on that detail.

1093
00:50:43,120 --> 00:50:46,560
Speaker 5: Just say, look, I've reconnected her with her and we've

1094
00:50:46,560 --> 00:50:48,840
Speaker 5: become pretty close, and I just thought that you should

1095
00:50:48,880 --> 00:50:51,760
Speaker 5: know that. I just didn't feel I felt it wouldn't

1096
00:50:51,760 --> 00:50:54,040
Speaker 5: be good of me to lie. I don't want to

1097
00:50:54,080 --> 00:50:56,719
Speaker 5: raise my kids, you know, knowing this lie. And I

1098
00:50:56,760 --> 00:50:58,799
Speaker 5: just wanted you to know that we've reconnected, we're really

1099
00:50:58,800 --> 00:51:01,279
Speaker 5: getting along my kids. It's like her kids, and I

1100
00:51:01,360 --> 00:51:05,640
Speaker 5: think she's a terrific, wonderful person. Done walk to the car.

1101
00:51:05,960 --> 00:51:07,200
Speaker 2: How do you feel about that, Lynn?

1102
00:51:07,680 --> 00:51:11,520
Speaker 8: Yeah, No, I feel like I could do that for sure.

1103
00:51:12,000 --> 00:51:14,480
Speaker 8: I actually had talked to my therapist about ways as

1104
00:51:14,480 --> 00:51:17,160
Speaker 8: well to try and just like drop the truth bomb

1105
00:51:17,239 --> 00:51:20,439
Speaker 8: and run. The funny thing is I don't. Actually I'm

1106
00:51:20,600 --> 00:51:23,880
Speaker 8: horrible at keeping secrets, so the fact that this is

1107
00:51:24,760 --> 00:51:27,640
Speaker 8: a secret that I've been keeping is like me alive.

1108
00:51:28,320 --> 00:51:30,439
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I would also just not You don't

1109
00:51:30,440 --> 00:51:33,040
Speaker 1: have to explain every single detail, you know what I mean.

1110
00:51:33,440 --> 00:51:35,839
Speaker 1: You just kind of give them the information that's absolutely

1111
00:51:35,880 --> 00:51:39,000
Speaker 1: necessary and walk to the car and follow up with

1112
00:51:39,040 --> 00:51:40,640
Speaker 1: them a couple days later. And if they don't want

1113
00:51:40,640 --> 00:51:41,799
Speaker 1: to talk to you for a while, then they don't

1114
00:51:41,840 --> 00:51:42,279
Speaker 1: want to talk.

1115
00:51:42,160 --> 00:51:42,880
Speaker 2: To you for a while.

1116
00:51:43,120 --> 00:51:45,120
Speaker 1: But it's better just to tell the truth, you know,

1117
00:51:45,239 --> 00:51:47,600
Speaker 1: and also for you for the sake of your children,

1118
00:51:47,640 --> 00:51:49,400
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, You just have to demonstrate

1119
00:51:49,640 --> 00:51:52,200
Speaker 1: how you want them to go through life. And lies

1120
00:51:52,239 --> 00:51:54,960
Speaker 1: are the worst and they all always come out. Everyone

1121
00:51:55,000 --> 00:51:58,240
Speaker 1: finds out about everything, So I don't understand why people

1122
00:51:58,360 --> 00:52:00,480
Speaker 1: continue to lie, But I mean I understand your situation,

1123
00:52:00,600 --> 00:52:02,880
Speaker 1: but just you know, you want to live in truth.

1124
00:52:03,560 --> 00:52:06,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, I agree. Okay, Well, good luck with everything. Let

1125
00:52:06,280 --> 00:52:09,080
Speaker 2: us know how it goes. Okay, yeah, I appreciate it.

1126
00:52:09,400 --> 00:52:12,879
Speaker 1: Okay, Okay, we'll take a quick break and then we'll

1127
00:52:12,880 --> 00:52:15,040
Speaker 1: be right back with Nicholas Sparks.

1128
00:52:19,360 --> 00:52:21,120
Speaker 2: How do you like our therapy session so far?

1129
00:52:21,200 --> 00:52:23,759
Speaker 5: Nicholas, Wow, these are tricky questions.

1130
00:52:23,920 --> 00:52:25,160
Speaker 2: Seriously, I don't know.

1131
00:52:25,120 --> 00:52:27,600
Speaker 5: That I'd like to do this every like you guys too.

1132
00:52:28,560 --> 00:52:31,960
Speaker 5: I don't want to give people advice. I've really handled

1133
00:52:32,040 --> 00:52:34,759
Speaker 5: my life, let alone trying to help other people with

1134
00:52:34,960 --> 00:52:35,680
Speaker 5: their lives.

1135
00:52:36,160 --> 00:52:38,200
Speaker 1: No shit, I mean I wish I gave the advice

1136
00:52:38,239 --> 00:52:41,400
Speaker 1: I give to other people to myself, because it's much different.

1137
00:52:42,400 --> 00:52:43,719
Speaker 2: What do we have to wrap up?

1138
00:52:43,840 --> 00:52:47,480
Speaker 4: Well, we do have one last question, so Carrie says,

1139
00:52:47,760 --> 00:52:51,360
Speaker 4: Dear Chelsea. I've never really referred to myself as an artist,

1140
00:52:51,440 --> 00:52:54,440
Speaker 4: but I've always needed to outwardly express myself. I love

1141
00:52:54,520 --> 00:52:56,839
Speaker 4: to sing, dance, draw, and I was a gymnast as

1142
00:52:56,840 --> 00:52:58,680
Speaker 4: a young girl. I've been through a lot in my

1143
00:52:58,719 --> 00:53:02,160
Speaker 4: fifty six years. White and Jewish and my father is black.

1144
00:53:02,440 --> 00:53:04,279
Speaker 4: Growing up in the suburbs of New York in the

1145
00:53:04,280 --> 00:53:07,600
Speaker 4: seventies and eighties, there were no other families that resembled mine.

1146
00:53:07,800 --> 00:53:09,799
Speaker 4: I grew thick skin and learned how to thrive in

1147
00:53:09,840 --> 00:53:12,480
Speaker 4: survival mode. I had subscribed to the belief that we

1148
00:53:12,520 --> 00:53:14,359
Speaker 4: can all be happy, but we must do the work

1149
00:53:14,360 --> 00:53:16,799
Speaker 4: on ourselves in order to live a happy life. I

1150
00:53:16,840 --> 00:53:19,080
Speaker 4: have often thought about writing my story of resilience to

1151
00:53:19,080 --> 00:53:21,120
Speaker 4: share with others, with the hopes of inspiring people who

1152
00:53:21,120 --> 00:53:24,480
Speaker 4: have struggled. Two years ago, my husband and I went

1153
00:53:24,520 --> 00:53:26,920
Speaker 4: to DC for his college reunion with a group of friends.

1154
00:53:27,239 --> 00:53:29,319
Speaker 3: We stayed in a big Victorian house and hung out.

1155
00:53:29,480 --> 00:53:31,239
Speaker 4: A few of us were in a transition phase and

1156
00:53:31,280 --> 00:53:33,640
Speaker 4: longing for something, but not sure what it was or

1157
00:53:33,640 --> 00:53:34,440
Speaker 4: how to achieve it.

1158
00:53:34,880 --> 00:53:36,920
Speaker 3: One of our friends suggested we do an exercise.

1159
00:53:37,200 --> 00:53:40,200
Speaker 4: We had to describe our dream life five years from now,

1160
00:53:40,280 --> 00:53:43,160
Speaker 4: as if it had already happened. I told them that

1161
00:53:43,280 --> 00:53:45,520
Speaker 4: my husband and I have been traveling all over the world.

1162
00:53:45,800 --> 00:53:47,520
Speaker 4: I blurted out that I had written a New York

1163
00:53:47,560 --> 00:53:49,799
Speaker 4: Times bestseller and I was currently on my book tour.

1164
00:53:50,000 --> 00:53:51,640
Speaker 4: I had toyed with the idea of writing a book,

1165
00:53:51,640 --> 00:53:54,080
Speaker 4: but had never said the words out loud. When we

1166
00:53:54,120 --> 00:53:56,319
Speaker 4: got home, I committed to writing daily and began with

1167
00:53:56,480 --> 00:54:00,279
Speaker 4: essays about my childhood, adulthood, trauma, all of it. Kept

1168
00:54:00,280 --> 00:54:01,880
Speaker 4: at it, and eventually there was a book.

1169
00:54:02,120 --> 00:54:03,120
Speaker 3: Here's my issue.

1170
00:54:03,239 --> 00:54:05,400
Speaker 4: I haven't read the book since I finished it or

1171
00:54:05,480 --> 00:54:07,960
Speaker 4: taken the next steps to find an editor. I'm very

1172
00:54:08,000 --> 00:54:10,120
Speaker 4: proud of myself for this achievement. I know it's a

1173
00:54:10,120 --> 00:54:12,680
Speaker 4: big deal. I also know that my stories will resonate

1174
00:54:12,719 --> 00:54:14,600
Speaker 4: with so many as the struggles I've been through are

1175
00:54:14,600 --> 00:54:16,799
Speaker 4: not uncommon, and my basic message is that we can

1176
00:54:16,840 --> 00:54:19,640
Speaker 4: get through anything. I realize that it is the fear

1177
00:54:19,680 --> 00:54:22,600
Speaker 4: of revealing myself and being vulnerable that's holding me back.

1178
00:54:22,719 --> 00:54:24,239
Speaker 4: Do you have any advice on how to push through

1179
00:54:24,239 --> 00:54:25,560
Speaker 4: the fear and take the next steps?

1180
00:54:25,760 --> 00:54:29,000
Speaker 2: Carrie? Yeah, walk through that door, Carrie, you got it.

1181
00:54:29,040 --> 00:54:29,560
Speaker 6: What I mean.

1182
00:54:29,600 --> 00:54:32,319
Speaker 1: Fear is there to face the challenge. I look at

1183
00:54:32,360 --> 00:54:35,160
Speaker 1: fear always as a challenge that I will overcome. If

1184
00:54:35,200 --> 00:54:38,480
Speaker 1: I'm scared of something, I move towards it even more forcefully.

1185
00:54:38,880 --> 00:54:40,920
Speaker 1: Unless you want to keep this book to yourself, you're

1186
00:54:40,920 --> 00:54:42,560
Speaker 1: going to have to take the steps to get it

1187
00:54:42,600 --> 00:54:46,840
Speaker 1: read by people and to get some feedback and some direction. Nicholas,

1188
00:54:46,840 --> 00:54:49,319
Speaker 1: what's your advice for a first time author trying to

1189
00:54:49,320 --> 00:54:50,239
Speaker 1: get their stuff read.

1190
00:54:51,120 --> 00:54:54,279
Speaker 5: Self edit, self edit, you know, if you haven't even

1191
00:54:54,280 --> 00:54:55,920
Speaker 5: read the book, since you have to.

1192
00:54:55,880 --> 00:54:56,719
Speaker 2: Go back and read it.

1193
00:54:56,920 --> 00:54:59,560
Speaker 5: I cannot tell you, guys, how many times I edit

1194
00:55:00,440 --> 00:55:04,640
Speaker 5: everything that I write. I edit every fourth sentence, I

1195
00:55:04,719 --> 00:55:07,240
Speaker 5: go back and edit those four I edit every clump

1196
00:55:07,280 --> 00:55:10,319
Speaker 5: of two pages. I ed from the beginning, clump of

1197
00:55:10,360 --> 00:55:12,960
Speaker 5: ten pages. Then I go back and I edit from

1198
00:55:13,000 --> 00:55:15,800
Speaker 5: the beginning. Once I hit a section, then my agent edits,

1199
00:55:15,880 --> 00:55:19,400
Speaker 5: then I edit, then I edit some more. I would

1200
00:55:19,400 --> 00:55:22,799
Speaker 5: say every sentence in every one of my novels, I've

1201
00:55:22,840 --> 00:55:27,920
Speaker 5: probably examined closely, word by word and within the context

1202
00:55:27,960 --> 00:55:33,000
Speaker 5: of a page or chapter fifteen times. So and I did.

1203
00:55:33,520 --> 00:55:36,520
Speaker 5: I did the same prior to trying to even find

1204
00:55:36,920 --> 00:55:40,640
Speaker 5: an agent or are a publisher for the notebook. If

1205
00:55:40,640 --> 00:55:43,399
Speaker 5: you're going to try to find an agent who are

1206
00:55:43,480 --> 00:55:46,320
Speaker 5: very selective because lots of people want to have books published,

1207
00:55:46,800 --> 00:55:49,279
Speaker 5: or you want to try to get your novel published

1208
00:55:49,280 --> 00:55:52,720
Speaker 5: by a big publishing house who also have a lot

1209
00:55:52,960 --> 00:55:57,839
Speaker 5: thousands and thousands and thousands of submissions, you're not doing

1210
00:55:57,880 --> 00:56:02,480
Speaker 5: yourself any favors by handing it, by not handing them

1211
00:56:02,600 --> 00:56:06,600
Speaker 5: the very best possible work that you could do.

1212
00:56:07,560 --> 00:56:11,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, you have to reread your book also, like

1213
00:56:11,640 --> 00:56:13,520
Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, you have to go because you're gonna

1214
00:56:13,560 --> 00:56:15,120
Speaker 1: I know you think like, oh, you're done. You have

1215
00:56:15,160 --> 00:56:18,160
Speaker 1: a book that's everything he says is absolutely true. And

1216
00:56:18,239 --> 00:56:19,880
Speaker 1: also you can give it to a couple of people

1217
00:56:19,960 --> 00:56:22,480
Speaker 1: get some feedback that'll help you with your editing perhaps,

1218
00:56:22,719 --> 00:56:24,840
Speaker 1: but you definitely have to get it out there. Like

1219
00:56:24,920 --> 00:56:27,360
Speaker 1: the fear of showing it to people. You got to

1220
00:56:27,360 --> 00:56:30,400
Speaker 1: get past that. You have to be open to criticism

1221
00:56:30,800 --> 00:56:33,279
Speaker 1: and constructive critique, like you just have to be open

1222
00:56:33,280 --> 00:56:33,520
Speaker 1: to it.

1223
00:56:33,560 --> 00:56:34,600
Speaker 2: That's part of the process.

1224
00:56:35,239 --> 00:56:38,640
Speaker 1: So good luck to you and hopefully we'll hear about

1225
00:56:38,640 --> 00:56:41,320
Speaker 1: your book in the future coming out and being published.

1226
00:56:41,960 --> 00:56:43,440
Speaker 2: And that's our episode for today.

1227
00:56:43,480 --> 00:56:47,240
Speaker 1: You guys, everyone go out and get Remain the novel

1228
00:56:47,320 --> 00:56:51,839
Speaker 1: by Nicholas Sparks with m. Knight not Chaka Khan Shyamalan,

1229
00:56:52,200 --> 00:56:53,799
Speaker 1: and it's going to come out as a movie, so

1230
00:56:53,840 --> 00:56:55,960
Speaker 1: you want to make sure you read the book before

1231
00:56:56,000 --> 00:56:59,120
Speaker 1: you see the movie. That's the order of business out here.

1232
00:56:59,640 --> 00:57:01,560
Speaker 1: Thank you, thanks so much, Nicholas, what a pleasure to.

1233
00:57:01,520 --> 00:57:02,120
Speaker 2: Speak with you.

1234
00:57:02,400 --> 00:57:04,279
Speaker 5: Hey, thank you for having me and you did you

1235
00:57:04,320 --> 00:57:08,920
Speaker 5: said his name exactly right. I listen. Thank you Samalan ex.

1236
00:57:09,400 --> 00:57:13,520
Speaker 2: Say please let him know.

1237
00:57:13,920 --> 00:57:16,919
Speaker 1: Please, Okay, take care Nicklas so much.

1238
00:57:17,080 --> 00:57:18,240
Speaker 2: Bye bye.

1239
00:57:18,720 --> 00:57:20,600
Speaker 1: I just announced all my tour dates. They just went

1240
00:57:20,640 --> 00:57:24,040
Speaker 1: on sale this week. It's called the High and Mighty Tour.

1241
00:57:24,560 --> 00:57:28,360
Speaker 1: I will be starting in February of next year, so

1242
00:57:28,760 --> 00:57:32,640
Speaker 1: I will be touring from February through June. So go

1243
00:57:32,640 --> 00:57:35,200
Speaker 1: get your tickets now. If you want good seats and

1244
00:57:35,240 --> 00:57:37,240
Speaker 1: you want to come see me perform, I will be

1245
00:57:37,360 --> 00:57:39,040
Speaker 1: on the High and Mighty Tour.

1246
00:57:39,640 --> 00:57:40,920
Speaker 2: Do you want advice from Chelsea?

1247
00:57:41,160 --> 00:57:44,640
Speaker 4: Right into Dear Chelsea Podcast at gmail dot com. Find

1248
00:57:44,680 --> 00:57:47,840
Speaker 4: full video episodes of Dear Chelsea on YouTube by searching

1249
00:57:47,920 --> 00:57:51,720
Speaker 4: at Dear Chelsea Pod. Dear Chelsea is edited and engineered

1250
00:57:51,720 --> 00:57:55,440
Speaker 4: by Brad Dickert executive producer Catherine law And be sure

1251
00:57:55,480 --> 00:58:03,040
Speaker 4: to check out our merch at Chelseahandler dot com