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Speaker 1: Jubils. Dirty little secret. There's dirty little secret will make

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Speaker 1: your piece mouth funny? Oh yeah, yes, yes, asparagus is

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Speaker 1: on the phone. Remember, we give everybody a fake anonymous nicknames.

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Speaker 1: You want to tellus a dirty little secret, all I

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Speaker 1: have to do is text in four one o six one.

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Speaker 1: You can tell us anything. We keep everybody anonymous. We

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Speaker 1: don't even ask what your name is. That's why you

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Speaker 1: get a fake name when you call in. And Alex

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Speaker 1: knew exactly where I was going with that. Asparagus is

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Speaker 1: on the phone. Hello, asparagus. Hey, this is asparagus. All right.

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Speaker 1: You're delicious, by the way. Yeah, i'd like to point

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Speaker 1: that out. Thanks, except if I forget that, I eat

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Speaker 1: you and I wake up in the morning to go

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Speaker 1: to the bathroom, I'm like, oh my god, what's wrong

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Speaker 1: with me? He made a cool problem. I'm like, oh wait,

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Speaker 1: oh god, I just had asparagus last night. All right,

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Speaker 1: So you have a dirty little secret you'd like to

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Speaker 1: tell us about asparagus. Yeah. So my dirty little secret

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Speaker 1: is that I have an odd kind of collection. So

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Speaker 1: when I was in high school, we had all class

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Speaker 1: and they gave out free condoms to all the students.

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Speaker 1: Nice and I held on to that one. Yeah, it

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Speaker 1: was like great, I might have to use this, and

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Speaker 1: so I like put it in a box. And then

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Speaker 1: I kept collecting different kinds of condoms everywhere I went,

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Speaker 1: Like if I went to the drug store, I'd be like, well,

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Speaker 1: maybe I'll just pick up these. And you go through

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Speaker 1: the condomisle in the grocery store or wherever, and you're

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Speaker 1: just like oh that and you have a collection. All

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Speaker 1: I can think about that one yet, Remember like when

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Speaker 1: your teams you can go to the walking clinic and

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Speaker 1: you get free condoms, like on the counter there's all

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Speaker 1: of them. Yeah, did you steal all those? Yeah, basically

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Speaker 1: like anyone that I hadn't had before I took. Or

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Speaker 1: like you know, in a like a bar, if you

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Speaker 1: go into the bathroom and there's like maybe weird ones,

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Speaker 1: you know Ribbed or her Pleasure or well those weird

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Speaker 1: brands that you've never heard of. Yeah, yeah, where you're

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Speaker 1: like knocker brand condoms and I've never heard of them.

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Speaker 1: What's your best one, the one that you're most proud

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Speaker 1: of in your collection? Um, the one that's my favorite.

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Speaker 1: Actually when you unroll it, it it says your name here

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Speaker 1: on it. Wow. That's incredible. So you use a big

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Speaker 1: collection of really random condoms. Uh, yeah, that's true. It's

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Speaker 1: a pretty big collection. But that's uh, that's not actually

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Speaker 1: my dirtiest little secret. Do we even want to know? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: So what did you do with these condoms? Well, the

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Speaker 1: problem is that I didn't do anything with it. My

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Speaker 1: collection is so big because I'm actually still a virgin.

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Speaker 1: You've never even used one at all before, other than

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Speaker 1: maybe probably blown them up in popable. Yeah, yeah, I've

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Speaker 1: they've half of them have expired at this point. Oh my,

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Speaker 1: keep collecting. I think that's an amazing collection. Yeah, I mean,

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Speaker 1: as a conversation starter, it's a weird one. But maybe

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Speaker 1: it'll work one day. Maybe. I'd hate to say this too, asparagus,

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Speaker 1: but you sound like, you know, relatively mature in terms

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Speaker 1: of age. How has it just not never happened or

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Speaker 1: you know, what's been the problem? Yeah, I don't. I

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Speaker 1: don't know. I can never seem to like get over

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Speaker 1: the friendship hump, and I like what you did there

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Speaker 1: and when that does happen. Um, you know a lot

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Speaker 1: about protection, right, because you've been collecting it since you

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Speaker 1: were very young and have all kinds of different ones.

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Speaker 1: Have you heard of the Trojan extended pleasure ones? Who yes,

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Speaker 1: I have like a numbing thing in it, so that

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Speaker 1: oh so you can taken last so a little bit longer, longer,

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Speaker 1: longer than second. Yeah, they make a spray too, so spray.

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Speaker 1: Oh so that you don't oh my god, yeah, so

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Speaker 1: that you yeah, so that you don't seeking last longer.

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Speaker 1: But it's not good though. I bet that's not good

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Speaker 1: for you. No, I mean it's not good as far

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Speaker 1: as how it makes you feel. Because it sounds like

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Speaker 1: a good idea, like, oh, this could help out, you know,

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Speaker 1: I could maybe last a little bit longer than a

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Speaker 1: TV commercial maybe, right, But then you use it and

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Speaker 1: then nothing works because it's like if you know, if

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Speaker 1: you go to the dentist, right, oh, and you're a

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Speaker 1: shot of novacane. Oh yeah, it feels like that party

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Speaker 1: you went to the dentist and it just will not work.

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Speaker 1: Oh okay, don't get the spray. Yeah, I'll avoid the

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Speaker 1: spray then, all right, Well, thank you for your dirty

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Speaker 1: little secret? Yeah? Thanks, guys, what's your dirty little secret?