1
00:00:00,080 --> 00:00:11,080
Speaker 1: The Nicky Glazer Podcast. O N here's Nikki. Hello there,

2
00:00:11,160 --> 00:00:14,360
Speaker 1: welcome to the show. It's a Nicki Glaser podcast. I'm

3
00:00:14,400 --> 00:00:18,960
Speaker 1: the problem. It's me. Um. I am in Los Angeles,

4
00:00:18,960 --> 00:00:23,959
Speaker 1: still um. Andrew is in St. Louis. Noah is in Arizona.

5
00:00:25,079 --> 00:00:29,680
Speaker 1: A great little morning here in Santa Monica. It's beautiful outside.

6
00:00:29,920 --> 00:00:34,000
Speaker 1: Walked to get Starbucks this morning. Everything's good. I'm packing.

7
00:00:34,040 --> 00:00:38,000
Speaker 1: I'm going to Atlanta for a taping. I get to

8
00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:40,200
Speaker 1: sleep all day on the plane. That's awesome. I love

9
00:00:40,400 --> 00:00:42,519
Speaker 1: I love going on a plane all day across country.

10
00:00:42,880 --> 00:00:46,360
Speaker 1: I leave it to here. I landed there. The day

11
00:00:46,400 --> 00:00:49,919
Speaker 1: will be over. Um And in the plane, no one

12
00:00:49,920 --> 00:00:52,880
Speaker 1: can get you. There's no obligations, there's no like urgent,

13
00:00:53,040 --> 00:00:55,920
Speaker 1: like you need to do this thing. Like the world

14
00:00:55,960 --> 00:00:58,120
Speaker 1: just is on pause when you're in a plane. Even

15
00:00:58,160 --> 00:01:01,520
Speaker 1: though you can get WiFi, you still it's the only place,

16
00:01:01,640 --> 00:01:05,880
Speaker 1: besides maybe if you go spelunking or on a hike

17
00:01:06,040 --> 00:01:09,000
Speaker 1: up a like, or if you're camping, those are the

18
00:01:09,040 --> 00:01:14,280
Speaker 1: only places. Plane splunking, in a cave or camping are

19
00:01:14,280 --> 00:01:16,520
Speaker 1: the only times where you have an excuse that your

20
00:01:16,560 --> 00:01:20,640
Speaker 1: phone is not If you're not on your hospital. Hospital

21
00:01:20,680 --> 00:01:26,720
Speaker 1: couldn't Maybe surgery, yeah, if you're getting surgery, um, But

22
00:01:26,800 --> 00:01:30,720
Speaker 1: hospitals have great WiFi. But you always What I'm saying

23
00:01:30,800 --> 00:01:32,480
Speaker 1: is there's those the only places where you have the

24
00:01:32,520 --> 00:01:35,840
Speaker 1: benefit of like the WiFi wasn't working because otherwise you

25
00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:40,440
Speaker 1: can get on a network um free. You can never

26
00:01:40,600 --> 00:01:44,160
Speaker 1: escape it anymore. Is Are there a lot of homeless

27
00:01:44,160 --> 00:01:46,759
Speaker 1: people in Santa Monica? Is it bad? Is it as

28
00:01:46,800 --> 00:01:48,680
Speaker 1: bad as people say, like when you go for a

29
00:01:48,680 --> 00:01:51,800
Speaker 1: wall in Santa Monica? Isn't because it's rich people, so

30
00:01:52,720 --> 00:01:57,360
Speaker 1: it's like a couple of them. Yeah, Venice, I hear,

31
00:01:57,560 --> 00:02:00,000
Speaker 1: is no offense to anyone living in Venice. I hear.

32
00:02:00,000 --> 00:02:02,080
Speaker 1: It's I mean, we didn't we were about to get

33
00:02:02,120 --> 00:02:04,080
Speaker 1: an airbing be there and I told Chris, I'm like,

34
00:02:04,720 --> 00:02:07,520
Speaker 1: I think the homeless situation is not good there, and

35
00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:09,200
Speaker 1: he was like, I don't know about that. And the

36
00:02:09,280 --> 00:02:12,000
Speaker 1: Texas friend like, you know, my girlfriend's a little worried

37
00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:14,079
Speaker 1: about the homeless situation event and she's like, oh, yeah,

38
00:02:14,160 --> 00:02:17,240
Speaker 1: don't come here. It's bad they you know, especially when

39
00:02:17,280 --> 00:02:19,720
Speaker 1: they break up the camps, which they do every so often.

40
00:02:19,880 --> 00:02:23,239
Speaker 1: Like it's just and I feel so bad for these people.

41
00:02:23,280 --> 00:02:24,679
Speaker 1: They don't know anywhere to go. They don't want to

42
00:02:24,720 --> 00:02:26,560
Speaker 1: be fucking homeless, they don't want to be on drugs,

43
00:02:26,560 --> 00:02:29,320
Speaker 1: they don't want to like it's just it sucks for

44
00:02:29,400 --> 00:02:33,360
Speaker 1: everyone involved in Um yeah, I was. I was wanting

45
00:02:33,360 --> 00:02:36,800
Speaker 1: to originally live in West Hollywood, and I just was like,

46
00:02:36,840 --> 00:02:38,399
Speaker 1: I don't want to do that because I was thinking

47
00:02:38,400 --> 00:02:41,520
Speaker 1: about bringing out Luigi and I just didn't feel safe

48
00:02:41,520 --> 00:02:44,280
Speaker 1: fucking my dog. That's why I got all these weapons.

49
00:02:44,320 --> 00:02:48,440
Speaker 1: I was just so scared of being attacked because you

50
00:02:48,520 --> 00:02:52,280
Speaker 1: hear about it. But um yeah, that you know, Hollywood's

51
00:02:52,320 --> 00:02:56,800
Speaker 1: not great, It's not horrible, but um yeah, and the

52
00:02:56,880 --> 00:02:59,400
Speaker 1: valley is nice. I mean there's places that don't have that.

53
00:02:59,440 --> 00:03:01,400
Speaker 1: But man, when I used to I used to live

54
00:03:01,400 --> 00:03:06,240
Speaker 1: in Silver Lake and I moved out in two thousand eighteen,

55
00:03:06,320 --> 00:03:09,280
Speaker 1: and I drive over there now and like everywhere near

56
00:03:09,360 --> 00:03:13,000
Speaker 1: my old apartment, which was in a nice area, like

57
00:03:13,280 --> 00:03:18,240
Speaker 1: all the underpasses, homeless encampments, and like just tons of

58
00:03:18,280 --> 00:03:19,760
Speaker 1: tents on the side of the road. Everyone looks like

59
00:03:19,760 --> 00:03:22,040
Speaker 1: they're camping out for a Harry Styles concert or like

60
00:03:22,080 --> 00:03:24,240
Speaker 1: a sail At best, it looks like Black Friday on

61
00:03:24,320 --> 00:03:29,720
Speaker 1: every um they're tailgating. It's it's so sad, but I

62
00:03:29,720 --> 00:03:32,440
Speaker 1: can make fun of it. Yeah, they don't have to

63
00:03:32,919 --> 00:03:36,760
Speaker 1: well they get to be off the grid even Yeah,

64
00:03:37,600 --> 00:03:42,840
Speaker 1: added to it, added to the list, bunking airplane homeless.

65
00:03:42,880 --> 00:03:45,560
Speaker 1: Now that's not even true. They all have they all phones,

66
00:03:45,920 --> 00:03:47,320
Speaker 1: and that is such a shitty thing to be, Like,

67
00:03:47,480 --> 00:03:49,720
Speaker 1: I'm not giving him a book. He is a phone.

68
00:03:50,080 --> 00:03:52,840
Speaker 1: A phone is It's almost like shelter and water. Now,

69
00:03:53,080 --> 00:03:55,920
Speaker 1: just just because someone has a phone doesn't mean that

70
00:03:55,960 --> 00:03:57,720
Speaker 1: they have enough money to get clean clothes, to go

71
00:03:57,760 --> 00:03:59,840
Speaker 1: get a job, and you know, all these things. So

72
00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:02,200
Speaker 1: don't be one of those things that I'm not giving.

73
00:04:02,320 --> 00:04:06,480
Speaker 1: He has a phone, don't be stupid. Come on, like

74
00:04:07,560 --> 00:04:10,000
Speaker 1: of Horizon, they're not like paying one twenty a month.

75
00:04:10,200 --> 00:04:12,840
Speaker 1: They don't have good WiFi. They probably connect to WiFi

76
00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:17,120
Speaker 1: outside of Starbucks. Like, don't act there, like how can they?

77
00:04:17,320 --> 00:04:20,080
Speaker 1: You know, sometimes you'll see a people are like, well

78
00:04:20,240 --> 00:04:23,320
Speaker 1: they're shaved, they have a shaved face. People love to

79
00:04:23,320 --> 00:04:27,520
Speaker 1: give anything, don't care money. Yeah, even my mom will

80
00:04:27,560 --> 00:04:30,119
Speaker 1: be like that guy's not really homeless. Like some people

81
00:04:30,160 --> 00:04:33,520
Speaker 1: do stand out with signs and say I'm homeless and

82
00:04:33,520 --> 00:04:35,760
Speaker 1: they aren't and then My mom was like, I know

83
00:04:35,880 --> 00:04:39,080
Speaker 1: that motherfucker. That guy goes home. I know where he lives.

84
00:04:39,839 --> 00:04:42,640
Speaker 1: There's an article about him, and I go, but isn't

85
00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:46,560
Speaker 1: this humiliating? Like isn't this a job and of itself?

86
00:04:46,600 --> 00:04:49,040
Speaker 1: I don't. I wouldn't do this. Would you stand on

87
00:04:49,080 --> 00:04:51,760
Speaker 1: the sidewalk and and in traffic and go up to

88
00:04:51,839 --> 00:04:54,440
Speaker 1: windows and have a sign? Not that I'm saying that's

89
00:04:54,480 --> 00:04:57,000
Speaker 1: like we should all give to him, but it's not

90
00:04:57,000 --> 00:05:00,880
Speaker 1: not work. That to me is war work than anything

91
00:05:00,920 --> 00:05:02,839
Speaker 1: I would do. Or like sitting on the sidewalk with

92
00:05:02,839 --> 00:05:06,839
Speaker 1: a sign and begging. That's embarrassing, it's it's shameful to

93
00:05:06,920 --> 00:05:08,960
Speaker 1: these people. They get they get spit on, they get

94
00:05:09,000 --> 00:05:12,320
Speaker 1: told they're people are mean to homeless people. So before

95
00:05:12,360 --> 00:05:15,000
Speaker 1: you judge to one of like they're just looking for handouts,

96
00:05:15,040 --> 00:05:16,680
Speaker 1: do you think they want to be on the fucking

97
00:05:16,760 --> 00:05:19,479
Speaker 1: sidewalk asking for help and do like and I'm talking

98
00:05:19,480 --> 00:05:21,640
Speaker 1: to all of your dad's, you know, like everyone's dad

99
00:05:21,720 --> 00:05:25,320
Speaker 1: is just like this that bomb. Like I feel like

100
00:05:25,400 --> 00:05:27,680
Speaker 1: dad's just don't have a lot of empathy for the homeless,

101
00:05:27,720 --> 00:05:30,120
Speaker 1: like they chose it or something. I know our listeners

102
00:05:30,120 --> 00:05:32,440
Speaker 1: are smarter than that. But it's just I think that

103
00:05:32,480 --> 00:05:36,400
Speaker 1: there's a lot of like just they chose that, or

104
00:05:36,480 --> 00:05:39,400
Speaker 1: they don't want to work. That guy in the morning,

105
00:05:39,480 --> 00:05:41,480
Speaker 1: like instead of putting a suit on, he like has

106
00:05:41,520 --> 00:05:46,720
Speaker 1: to throw some mud on and throw on a contours

107
00:05:46,839 --> 00:05:49,840
Speaker 1: all over his face. I get it, I've done it.

108
00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:52,039
Speaker 1: He doesn't rub the contour in. You ever see a

109
00:05:52,040 --> 00:05:54,359
Speaker 1: girl put on contour, It's just like she was like,

110
00:05:54,400 --> 00:05:56,560
Speaker 1: looks like she's putting on war paint. He just does

111
00:05:56,600 --> 00:06:00,880
Speaker 1: that but doesn't rub it in. Um, it's a fucking job.

112
00:06:00,920 --> 00:06:03,159
Speaker 1: You're right. You have to stand outside for people say

113
00:06:03,279 --> 00:06:06,719
Speaker 1: she's using her kids. You know the women that have kids,

114
00:06:07,360 --> 00:06:09,960
Speaker 1: those poor fun Give that woman money even though she

115
00:06:10,080 --> 00:06:12,560
Speaker 1: might be using her kids, like she has kids. Do

116
00:06:12,600 --> 00:06:14,159
Speaker 1: you think those kids want to be there? Do you

117
00:06:14,160 --> 00:06:16,080
Speaker 1: think they know the difference between their mom and someone

118
00:06:16,320 --> 00:06:17,880
Speaker 1: other moms? Do you think they chose that mom? Do

119
00:06:17,920 --> 00:06:20,560
Speaker 1: you think they want to be there? Like, think about them.

120
00:06:20,600 --> 00:06:22,880
Speaker 1: I know that the mom is shitty, maybe, like I

121
00:06:22,920 --> 00:06:25,719
Speaker 1: don't know. People just have so much and I'm the

122
00:06:25,720 --> 00:06:28,000
Speaker 1: same way. I can judge people so quickly about stuff

123
00:06:28,040 --> 00:06:31,279
Speaker 1: and not consider like what really brought them to this moment.

124
00:06:31,320 --> 00:06:33,520
Speaker 1: The other day, Chris and I got into a uh,

125
00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:36,840
Speaker 1: I don't want to say fight, an argument pretty heated

126
00:06:37,040 --> 00:06:39,960
Speaker 1: and it was so helpful. And I know I've shared

127
00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:43,279
Speaker 1: this before, but I really I worked this tool so

128
00:06:43,320 --> 00:06:46,479
Speaker 1: hard the other day. And by the tool, I mean Chris,

129
00:06:46,640 --> 00:06:50,880
Speaker 1: I worked. Um, I know I worked this tool. He

130
00:06:50,880 --> 00:06:53,280
Speaker 1: would not like that joke. I'm just getting baby, it

131
00:06:53,360 --> 00:06:59,240
Speaker 1: was just a joke. I think he ate that more. Baby, Yeah,

132
00:06:59,279 --> 00:07:06,479
Speaker 1: he might name that. I thought you were referencing his

133
00:07:06,560 --> 00:07:16,520
Speaker 1: penis that tool. Oh yeah, well that later on old

134
00:07:16,600 --> 00:07:21,880
Speaker 1: Nosa over there. Um, if you are just joining the podcast,

135
00:07:21,880 --> 00:07:24,680
Speaker 1: that's a deep ham drip from way back when when

136
00:07:24,720 --> 00:07:27,560
Speaker 1: Noah revealed Twists that she likes to take her nose

137
00:07:27,640 --> 00:07:31,120
Speaker 1: and gently push it up against the ball satic scrowdum,

138
00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:33,920
Speaker 1: separating the two balls with her nose into yeah on

139
00:07:33,960 --> 00:07:37,440
Speaker 1: the bottom, like going up from the bottom and separating

140
00:07:37,520 --> 00:07:40,160
Speaker 1: the sack at the seam with her nose and feeling

141
00:07:40,200 --> 00:07:49,960
Speaker 1: each ball gently massage it is. It looks like exactly

142
00:07:49,960 --> 00:07:56,240
Speaker 1: like a division sign. Yeah, like the line and the

143
00:07:56,280 --> 00:08:04,880
Speaker 1: ball yeah division long ball division. But we did this thing,

144
00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:08,240
Speaker 1: like I was. We were both so mad at each

145
00:08:08,280 --> 00:08:11,760
Speaker 1: other about the misunderstanding about just we were both at

146
00:08:11,760 --> 00:08:14,600
Speaker 1: a stalemate of like so mad and we've all been

147
00:08:14,640 --> 00:08:18,000
Speaker 1: there before with our partners, of like you're so frustrated.

148
00:08:18,120 --> 00:08:20,320
Speaker 1: You know that you're not getting through. Your point is

149
00:08:20,360 --> 00:08:22,600
Speaker 1: not You've already made your point. They get your point

150
00:08:22,640 --> 00:08:24,960
Speaker 1: and they don't care about your point, and you feel

151
00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:27,840
Speaker 1: the same way about them. It's a beautiful thing. In

152
00:08:27,840 --> 00:08:29,960
Speaker 1: that moment, I was like, I knew that there was

153
00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:32,160
Speaker 1: no getting out of it. It's like this was either

154
00:08:32,200 --> 00:08:35,080
Speaker 1: going to like not break us up, but like be

155
00:08:35,200 --> 00:08:38,840
Speaker 1: a really really arduous, long time fight. And I just

156
00:08:38,880 --> 00:08:40,640
Speaker 1: didn't have the energy for it. And I also just

157
00:08:40,800 --> 00:08:42,800
Speaker 1: I just didn't want to, you know. It's just like

158
00:08:42,880 --> 00:08:45,160
Speaker 1: this is a thing that we've gotten into before. I

159
00:08:45,200 --> 00:08:46,880
Speaker 1: was like, I don't want to do this again. So

160
00:08:46,960 --> 00:08:50,800
Speaker 1: I just imagined I felt my anger at how fucking

161
00:08:50,840 --> 00:08:56,000
Speaker 1: angry I was at being misunderstood and and and how

162
00:08:56,120 --> 00:08:59,480
Speaker 1: I actually understood and not empathized with. I felt so

163
00:08:59,600 --> 00:09:03,040
Speaker 1: much anger that he wasn't getting it, wasn't apologizing right,

164
00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:07,200
Speaker 1: And then I go, oh, my god, he feels the

165
00:09:07,280 --> 00:09:09,960
Speaker 1: exact same way about me right now. There's no way

166
00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:11,959
Speaker 1: he doesn't. And then all of a sudden, I was

167
00:09:12,000 --> 00:09:14,760
Speaker 1: like Nicky just switched. Like, know that whatever you're feeling,

168
00:09:14,800 --> 00:09:17,360
Speaker 1: he's feeling it towards you. He's feeling just as much frustration.

169
00:09:17,400 --> 00:09:19,480
Speaker 1: He's feeling just as backed up against the wall, he's

170
00:09:19,480 --> 00:09:22,200
Speaker 1: feeling just as much resistance. And I was able to

171
00:09:22,280 --> 00:09:25,320
Speaker 1: just go, imagine you are in the wrong for just

172
00:09:25,360 --> 00:09:27,480
Speaker 1: a second, even though you know you're not, because you're

173
00:09:27,480 --> 00:09:29,880
Speaker 1: both we were both in the right in our own way.

174
00:09:30,280 --> 00:09:32,800
Speaker 1: I was just like, just imagine how much he hates

175
00:09:32,840 --> 00:09:35,440
Speaker 1: you right now, not hates me, but like the anger

176
00:09:35,480 --> 00:09:37,800
Speaker 1: that he feels towards me right now. I know that

177
00:09:37,840 --> 00:09:40,839
Speaker 1: he has it and feels sad like feel like, try

178
00:09:40,880 --> 00:09:42,960
Speaker 1: to get him out of that, you know, like do

179
00:09:43,240 --> 00:09:45,640
Speaker 1: what he what you want him to do for you

180
00:09:45,720 --> 00:09:49,480
Speaker 1: right now? Do for him, apologize, just do even though

181
00:09:49,520 --> 00:09:51,880
Speaker 1: if you don't think you're wrong, like try to find it.

182
00:09:51,960 --> 00:09:54,200
Speaker 1: Was just helpful to go because one time, I remember

183
00:09:54,320 --> 00:09:57,920
Speaker 1: my sister and I were fighting as kids, and I

184
00:09:58,000 --> 00:10:00,680
Speaker 1: used to hate my sister like they hatured I would

185
00:10:00,679 --> 00:10:04,760
Speaker 1: have for her in some moments was so raw and

186
00:10:06,080 --> 00:10:10,200
Speaker 1: hot and real like and if you have a sibling,

187
00:10:10,240 --> 00:10:11,880
Speaker 1: you know what I'm talking about, Like where you're just

188
00:10:11,920 --> 00:10:16,880
Speaker 1: like I like, just hate and I remember one time

189
00:10:17,800 --> 00:10:21,160
Speaker 1: I was like, Lauren, my sister was like, I hate

190
00:10:21,240 --> 00:10:23,320
Speaker 1: you so much, like you don't even understand, like I

191
00:10:23,320 --> 00:10:25,400
Speaker 1: wish you were dead. I hate you, and I go, Lauren,

192
00:10:25,800 --> 00:10:29,920
Speaker 1: it's so weird. I've told this before. I'm like, I

193
00:10:29,960 --> 00:10:32,559
Speaker 1: hate you too, like I feel the exact same way,

194
00:10:32,600 --> 00:10:35,679
Speaker 1: like I know exactly, like I get you don't even

195
00:10:35,720 --> 00:10:37,240
Speaker 1: have to communicate how much you want me to die,

196
00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:39,760
Speaker 1: like I literally want you to die, like I hate

197
00:10:39,760 --> 00:10:41,679
Speaker 1: you so much. And it was like brought us together

198
00:10:41,720 --> 00:10:44,320
Speaker 1: because we both hated each other equally and it almost

199
00:10:44,360 --> 00:10:46,640
Speaker 1: was like we have so much more in common than

200
00:10:46,679 --> 00:10:48,880
Speaker 1: we think. But it always brings me back to that

201
00:10:48,920 --> 00:10:51,680
Speaker 1: because I really sensed it, and my sister I was like,

202
00:10:51,760 --> 00:10:53,720
Speaker 1: I just realized. I was like, oh, she feels the

203
00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:58,199
Speaker 1: same way. Do you ever have that you for sure?

204
00:10:58,280 --> 00:11:00,520
Speaker 1: I mean last night would would and you say the

205
00:11:00,559 --> 00:11:03,280
Speaker 1: apology though last night or the other day with Chris,

206
00:11:03,360 --> 00:11:05,760
Speaker 1: did you get an apology back or were you just

207
00:11:05,880 --> 00:11:11,760
Speaker 1: okay with given the apology like that I said, I said, listen,

208
00:11:12,000 --> 00:11:16,680
Speaker 1: I miss I misspoke. I because I did. I figured

209
00:11:16,720 --> 00:11:18,920
Speaker 1: out like what the issue was, like I could find

210
00:11:19,000 --> 00:11:21,560
Speaker 1: some fault I was like, my tone was not good.

211
00:11:22,160 --> 00:11:24,080
Speaker 1: I was kind of looking to bring up a fight

212
00:11:24,160 --> 00:11:26,360
Speaker 1: that I like, I wanted to talk about something that

213
00:11:26,440 --> 00:11:28,280
Speaker 1: wasn't this, But this was kind of like the spur

214
00:11:28,360 --> 00:11:30,360
Speaker 1: of it for sure, Like I I said something like,

215
00:11:31,120 --> 00:11:33,800
Speaker 1: you're right, my tone wasn't good. I misspoke. I repeated

216
00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:37,080
Speaker 1: back to him what he needed me to understand, and

217
00:11:37,120 --> 00:11:39,760
Speaker 1: I said, do you believe me? I was like, I know,

218
00:11:39,880 --> 00:11:41,480
Speaker 1: that's not what you meant. What you meant was this,

219
00:11:41,600 --> 00:11:43,320
Speaker 1: even though it came off across this way to me,

220
00:11:44,679 --> 00:11:46,880
Speaker 1: this is what you meant. Do you believe me? He's like,

221
00:11:46,960 --> 00:11:49,440
Speaker 1: I don't know, you know? And I was like, well

222
00:11:49,559 --> 00:11:51,920
Speaker 1: do you? Can you see? And after you kind of

223
00:11:52,040 --> 00:11:55,160
Speaker 1: like he accepted my apology, I said, but can you

224
00:11:55,280 --> 00:11:58,400
Speaker 1: see how your tone and the way you said the

225
00:11:58,440 --> 00:12:01,280
Speaker 1: thing you said might lead me to get very defensive

226
00:12:01,320 --> 00:12:04,720
Speaker 1: about this? And he was like, yes, I can't see that.

227
00:12:04,760 --> 00:12:08,040
Speaker 1: And so then it was we Eventually, when things cooled down,

228
00:12:08,080 --> 00:12:10,600
Speaker 1: we both got each other. We both apologize to each

229
00:12:10,640 --> 00:12:12,679
Speaker 1: other for how we had acted. So I did get that,

230
00:12:12,760 --> 00:12:14,520
Speaker 1: but I had to be the one to do it first,

231
00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:17,240
Speaker 1: and not because I'm the better person or something. It

232
00:12:17,360 --> 00:12:19,720
Speaker 1: just happened you know, you can't both do it at

233
00:12:19,720 --> 00:12:21,200
Speaker 1: the same time, or we'd have to jinx by me

234
00:12:21,240 --> 00:12:28,760
Speaker 1: a coke. That's neither of us. Soda. Well maybe, but um, yeah,

235
00:12:28,840 --> 00:12:32,160
Speaker 1: that that happens. And we've talked about tone on here before.

236
00:12:32,320 --> 00:12:34,960
Speaker 1: Like I have a lot of trouble with it, especially

237
00:12:35,000 --> 00:12:37,120
Speaker 1: if someone's like, let's say someone's having a bad day,

238
00:12:37,920 --> 00:12:40,439
Speaker 1: you know, and then the tone is then and shifted

239
00:12:40,520 --> 00:12:42,839
Speaker 1: towards you, even though it has nothing to do with you.

240
00:12:43,040 --> 00:12:45,720
Speaker 1: It's so shitty what they're going through that it comes

241
00:12:45,760 --> 00:12:48,360
Speaker 1: towards you, and I can't help but take it personally,

242
00:12:48,400 --> 00:12:51,360
Speaker 1: and I don't know how. And then I give and

243
00:12:51,440 --> 00:12:55,240
Speaker 1: then I give tone back. I give tone back, you know. Um,

244
00:12:55,920 --> 00:12:58,319
Speaker 1: And I'm like, well, my tone is legitimate because I

245
00:12:58,400 --> 00:12:59,839
Speaker 1: was in the first half the time. You know. What

246
00:12:59,920 --> 00:13:02,520
Speaker 1: I've also realized, Andrew and that you're talking about is

247
00:13:02,600 --> 00:13:05,560
Speaker 1: like like even this morning, I was a little bit

248
00:13:05,720 --> 00:13:08,840
Speaker 1: like upset about something and I'm not going to see

249
00:13:08,920 --> 00:13:11,000
Speaker 1: him until Sunday and I'm packing to get ready and

250
00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:15,319
Speaker 1: I'm just trying to like I'm just being not as cool.

251
00:13:15,559 --> 00:13:17,800
Speaker 1: You're like, I'm just not being warm, And I was like,

252
00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:20,440
Speaker 1: are you doing this because you want him to ask

253
00:13:20,520 --> 00:13:23,719
Speaker 1: you what's wrong and the answer or do you are

254
00:13:23,760 --> 00:13:25,319
Speaker 1: you doing this because you really don't want to be

255
00:13:25,360 --> 00:13:26,679
Speaker 1: close to him right now and this is just a

256
00:13:26,840 --> 00:13:29,839
Speaker 1: natural thing. And I was like, I'm doing it. It's

257
00:13:29,840 --> 00:13:31,760
Speaker 1: a little of both, but it was mainly because I

258
00:13:31,840 --> 00:13:35,719
Speaker 1: wanted him to kind of notice and ask me so

259
00:13:35,840 --> 00:13:37,839
Speaker 1: I can tell him what's going on my mind because

260
00:13:37,920 --> 00:13:39,320
Speaker 1: I just don't want to bring it up and feel

261
00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:41,000
Speaker 1: like a nag and all those things, like I want

262
00:13:41,080 --> 00:13:42,920
Speaker 1: him to like dig for it. So it was like

263
00:13:43,440 --> 00:13:49,520
Speaker 1: I realized that I sometimes I am not helping the situation,

264
00:13:49,679 --> 00:13:53,880
Speaker 1: Like sometimes I feel like when this is where and

265
00:13:53,920 --> 00:13:55,520
Speaker 1: I saw on love is blind and this is what

266
00:13:55,600 --> 00:13:59,840
Speaker 1: a trap I think relationships get into. He so let's say, um,

267
00:14:00,200 --> 00:14:02,559
Speaker 1: he's in a bad mood and he comes home and

268
00:14:02,760 --> 00:14:04,840
Speaker 1: I can sense it in him. He's hungry, he's tired,

269
00:14:04,960 --> 00:14:07,040
Speaker 1: it's whatever. He had a bad day at work. I

270
00:14:07,880 --> 00:14:10,720
Speaker 1: he I take it so personally, because I'm an adult,

271
00:14:10,800 --> 00:14:14,079
Speaker 1: child's an alcoholic. I take it personally. And then instead

272
00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:16,240
Speaker 1: of being nurturing to him, which is what he needs,

273
00:14:16,400 --> 00:14:18,400
Speaker 1: sweet to him, which is what he needs because he's

274
00:14:18,440 --> 00:14:21,080
Speaker 1: had a rough day, I take it personally and then

275
00:14:21,120 --> 00:14:23,920
Speaker 1: I shut down and then I get then I get bitchy,

276
00:14:24,360 --> 00:14:27,680
Speaker 1: and one person is going to feel closer to you

277
00:14:28,560 --> 00:14:31,200
Speaker 1: that if you act pitchy like that's only he's that's

278
00:14:31,200 --> 00:14:32,880
Speaker 1: just giving him more of what he's dealt with in

279
00:14:32,960 --> 00:14:34,640
Speaker 1: his day, more of what's going on in his head.

280
00:14:34,680 --> 00:14:36,440
Speaker 1: I'm like adding to it. And I see this on

281
00:14:36,520 --> 00:14:38,640
Speaker 1: Love His Blind there's this couple. If you're watching it,

282
00:14:39,400 --> 00:14:46,880
Speaker 1: they are um uh it's um Cole and uh Jenab

283
00:14:47,080 --> 00:14:50,480
Speaker 1: Jenab I think her name is. And it's so interesting

284
00:14:50,560 --> 00:14:53,600
Speaker 1: because they had sex in the morning. Cole was trying

285
00:14:53,640 --> 00:14:55,840
Speaker 1: to be quiet and not wake her up and got

286
00:14:55,880 --> 00:14:57,600
Speaker 1: out of bed and was like trying, you know, doing

287
00:14:57,720 --> 00:15:00,280
Speaker 1: his like morning rituals. But he was being quiet and

288
00:15:00,440 --> 00:15:02,880
Speaker 1: she didn't know that. I'm guessing she did not know

289
00:15:03,040 --> 00:15:05,480
Speaker 1: that he knew that that that she was awake, so

290
00:15:05,640 --> 00:15:07,680
Speaker 1: she thought he was giving her the silent treatment after

291
00:15:07,760 --> 00:15:09,680
Speaker 1: they had sex, but all she wanted it. So then

292
00:15:10,120 --> 00:15:11,720
Speaker 1: what does she do Instead of saying, why are you

293
00:15:11,720 --> 00:15:14,320
Speaker 1: giving me the sound Truman, she starts fucking punishing him

294
00:15:14,360 --> 00:15:15,920
Speaker 1: because she's like, I'm not gonna be the first to

295
00:15:15,960 --> 00:15:18,080
Speaker 1: get hurt. I'm gonna hurt you before you hurt me,

296
00:15:18,440 --> 00:15:20,200
Speaker 1: and then he all of a sudden is like, she

297
00:15:20,480 --> 00:15:22,800
Speaker 1: is being so mean to me. What's going on? Then

298
00:15:22,840 --> 00:15:25,160
Speaker 1: he's been back to her. So it's the cycle. It's

299
00:15:25,160 --> 00:15:27,680
Speaker 1: like someone's gonna break it and just be nice to

300
00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:30,160
Speaker 1: the other person. And I thought, you know, I was

301
00:15:30,280 --> 00:15:33,240
Speaker 1: a little bitchy this morning because I didn't get what

302
00:15:33,320 --> 00:15:35,640
Speaker 1: I needed last night in terms of something, you know,

303
00:15:35,760 --> 00:15:38,720
Speaker 1: some kind of emotional connection. And the truth is he

304
00:15:38,840 --> 00:15:41,760
Speaker 1: was tired. I came home late, he was like bleary

305
00:15:41,840 --> 00:15:44,040
Speaker 1: eyed watching Game of Thrones, and I like walked in

306
00:15:44,040 --> 00:15:46,000
Speaker 1: and turn on the lights and I'm like I want attention,

307
00:15:46,080 --> 00:15:48,080
Speaker 1: and he didn't give it to me. And so this

308
00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:51,320
Speaker 1: morning I'm like, I'm I really regret how I acted

309
00:15:51,400 --> 00:15:55,400
Speaker 1: this morning because I was adding to what was probably

310
00:15:55,680 --> 00:15:58,720
Speaker 1: he probably I went to therapy and she goes, one

311
00:15:58,760 --> 00:16:01,120
Speaker 1: of you always needs to be the schmoopy, you know,

312
00:16:01,280 --> 00:16:03,680
Speaker 1: like what she said, one of you needs to be

313
00:16:03,800 --> 00:16:06,480
Speaker 1: the one that's like the baby, and the other needs

314
00:16:06,520 --> 00:16:09,280
Speaker 1: to be really gentle. And if that baby is in

315
00:16:09,360 --> 00:16:12,280
Speaker 1: a bad mood, don't respond to it with a bad mood,

316
00:16:12,320 --> 00:16:15,040
Speaker 1: don't take it personally. But it is so hard not

317
00:16:15,200 --> 00:16:17,880
Speaker 1: to it's so hard not to because we just want

318
00:16:17,920 --> 00:16:20,080
Speaker 1: everyone to like us. That's why we're comedians, like we

319
00:16:20,200 --> 00:16:22,320
Speaker 1: want everyone to like us, and when they're in a

320
00:16:22,400 --> 00:16:24,480
Speaker 1: bad mood, we think it's our responsibility when it really

321
00:16:24,520 --> 00:16:26,640
Speaker 1: has nothing to do with us. People get be in

322
00:16:26,680 --> 00:16:29,720
Speaker 1: a bad mood despite us. You know, I know about

323
00:16:29,800 --> 00:16:32,960
Speaker 1: then what is the answer to okay? If it's if

324
00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:35,320
Speaker 1: it has nothing? To find out that answer right after

325
00:16:35,400 --> 00:16:40,640
Speaker 1: this break, besties, I don't know, you know, but I

326
00:16:40,880 --> 00:16:43,200
Speaker 1: have a new tour that is happening right now. It's

327
00:16:43,200 --> 00:16:45,920
Speaker 1: called the Good Girl Tour. It is sweeping the nation,

328
00:16:46,080 --> 00:16:49,280
Speaker 1: starting out in Iowa this weekend, and then I'm in Reno,

329
00:16:49,480 --> 00:16:52,360
Speaker 1: I'm in um California. Have four different cities there. I

330
00:16:52,400 --> 00:16:56,960
Speaker 1: am in Vermont, I am in the Providence, Rhode Island, Memphis, Tennessee, Waterloo,

331
00:16:56,960 --> 00:17:00,920
Speaker 1: New York, Quercy, Pennsylvania, Oklahoma City pulls Us, Louis, Albany,

332
00:17:01,040 --> 00:17:05,359
Speaker 1: Portland's Maine, New York, Hampton, New Hampshire, and then I

333
00:17:05,520 --> 00:17:07,639
Speaker 1: hit Europe. So those are all the cities I'm going

334
00:17:07,680 --> 00:17:09,840
Speaker 1: to be reminding you. If you know anyone in those cities,

335
00:17:09,960 --> 00:17:12,040
Speaker 1: let them know they have a fun night of comedy

336
00:17:12,040 --> 00:17:13,920
Speaker 1: awaiting them. Just down the street. You can go to

337
00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:16,880
Speaker 1: nikulaser dot com for tickets. I would love to see

338
00:17:16,880 --> 00:17:18,880
Speaker 1: you there. As always, there are meet and greets available.

339
00:17:18,960 --> 00:17:20,600
Speaker 1: If you go alone, I will grant to a free

340
00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:22,280
Speaker 1: meet and greet. You just have to write me going

341
00:17:22,320 --> 00:17:25,040
Speaker 1: alone in all caps, your name and the city in

342
00:17:25,119 --> 00:17:26,960
Speaker 1: which you're going to see me, nothing else. You don't

343
00:17:26,960 --> 00:17:28,920
Speaker 1: even need to write thank you. If you write anything else,

344
00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:31,240
Speaker 1: it will actually make it so I don't see the message.

345
00:17:31,280 --> 00:17:33,240
Speaker 1: But you must start the message with going alone, and

346
00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:35,680
Speaker 1: don't follow it up with anything, because otherwise I won't

347
00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:37,480
Speaker 1: see it. It's very weird how it works. So thank

348
00:17:37,520 --> 00:17:38,840
Speaker 1: you so much. And I hope I get to meet you.

349
00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:40,800
Speaker 1: And if you don't go alone, meet and greet tickets

350
00:17:40,840 --> 00:17:42,840
Speaker 1: are available at the merch booth. And I've got some

351
00:17:43,040 --> 00:17:45,040
Speaker 1: sick merch this time around too. I can't wait to

352
00:17:45,080 --> 00:17:46,440
Speaker 1: see you. I can't wait to perform for you. I

353
00:17:46,480 --> 00:17:48,480
Speaker 1: can't wait to meet you. Come on out Iowa this

354
00:17:48,600 --> 00:17:55,119
Speaker 1: weekend and California next weekend. So what was your question,

355
00:17:55,200 --> 00:17:57,879
Speaker 1: Andrew with what is the answer? We should add in

356
00:17:57,920 --> 00:18:00,520
Speaker 1: every segment with me? But what is what is the

357
00:18:00,600 --> 00:18:05,840
Speaker 1: meaning of what? And why did my dad have an affair.

358
00:18:06,240 --> 00:18:09,200
Speaker 1: But what is the answer, you said, you know what, like,

359
00:18:09,320 --> 00:18:13,840
Speaker 1: what is the answer to go? Okay? Right? Meet meet

360
00:18:13,960 --> 00:18:16,800
Speaker 1: their mood with like a hug of like hey, what

361
00:18:17,119 --> 00:18:19,200
Speaker 1: thing are you okay? Do you want to talk? Be loving,

362
00:18:19,320 --> 00:18:22,679
Speaker 1: be gentle, be treat them like smoopy, they're a baby.

363
00:18:23,040 --> 00:18:24,800
Speaker 1: And then sometimes you get to be a baby and

364
00:18:24,960 --> 00:18:27,760
Speaker 1: they treat you like one. You know, like it gets

365
00:18:27,840 --> 00:18:31,040
Speaker 1: to go back and forth. It's really hard. I'll try

366
00:18:31,080 --> 00:18:33,000
Speaker 1: to breathe in the moment and just take a step

367
00:18:33,040 --> 00:18:37,680
Speaker 1: back and be a smoop. It doesn't come naturally. I

368
00:18:37,760 --> 00:18:40,359
Speaker 1: think we all want like, well, that's not how I'm feeling,

369
00:18:40,400 --> 00:18:42,880
Speaker 1: so I'm not gonna do it. It's like, well, sometimes

370
00:18:42,920 --> 00:18:47,159
Speaker 1: you've gotta be the better person and and just do

371
00:18:47,280 --> 00:18:49,720
Speaker 1: a harder thing to see if it gives you different results.

372
00:18:49,720 --> 00:18:51,840
Speaker 1: If it doesn't, if there's still a piece of ship,

373
00:18:52,320 --> 00:18:54,960
Speaker 1: then yeah, go in your bad mood, but like try

374
00:18:55,080 --> 00:18:58,240
Speaker 1: maybe gentleness. Do you ever feel like you're like, well,

375
00:18:58,280 --> 00:19:02,959
Speaker 1: I'm tired in a bad mood too, Like that's when

376
00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:04,920
Speaker 1: my therapist session sounds. She was like, it sounds like

377
00:19:05,040 --> 00:19:07,240
Speaker 1: this fight that we were rehashing the therapy. She was,

378
00:19:07,320 --> 00:19:10,440
Speaker 1: it sounds like This originated from you both being tired,

379
00:19:11,240 --> 00:19:13,320
Speaker 1: not feeling like you got enough of love. For the

380
00:19:13,400 --> 00:19:16,159
Speaker 1: past few weeks, I hadn't seen each other, and you

381
00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:18,639
Speaker 1: both felt I was you know, the fight we were

382
00:19:18,840 --> 00:19:21,680
Speaker 1: reliving was I was right after surgery for me, and

383
00:19:21,840 --> 00:19:23,680
Speaker 1: he had just come off this bike trip where he's

384
00:19:23,680 --> 00:19:26,280
Speaker 1: giving all and then he was helping me through surgery.

385
00:19:26,359 --> 00:19:28,000
Speaker 1: We get into a little tiff and I'm like, I

386
00:19:28,040 --> 00:19:30,119
Speaker 1: can't give him love because I can't even talk and

387
00:19:30,200 --> 00:19:32,440
Speaker 1: I've just been through surgery and I'm tired. He's tired

388
00:19:32,480 --> 00:19:34,639
Speaker 1: because he's just like gotten me through surgery. So we

389
00:19:34,720 --> 00:19:37,280
Speaker 1: were both just not there for each other. And that's

390
00:19:37,320 --> 00:19:41,720
Speaker 1: where I said, next time that happens, we space. We

391
00:19:42,160 --> 00:19:45,240
Speaker 1: we create space because it's not neither one of us

392
00:19:45,320 --> 00:19:48,879
Speaker 1: are strong or you know, awake enough to be the

393
00:19:48,960 --> 00:19:51,560
Speaker 1: bigger person and take that do the harder step, which

394
00:19:51,640 --> 00:19:53,440
Speaker 1: is to be nice to the other person and see

395
00:19:53,480 --> 00:19:58,720
Speaker 1: what happens. Um. But I think that's really helpful for

396
00:19:58,800 --> 00:20:02,920
Speaker 1: people because I think so many space in space hard

397
00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:08,119
Speaker 1: to create space in a relationship. You right, and you

398
00:20:08,240 --> 00:20:11,560
Speaker 1: get to Nikki because for your career, you get to

399
00:20:11,800 --> 00:20:13,440
Speaker 1: leave for a little bit and come back and I

400
00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:16,520
Speaker 1: think that's so helpful, or could be so helpful in

401
00:20:16,560 --> 00:20:19,280
Speaker 1: a relationship for people who don't have that as part

402
00:20:19,320 --> 00:20:21,159
Speaker 1: of their job. It is, it's a great part of

403
00:20:21,880 --> 00:20:23,560
Speaker 1: my job is that I get to leave and we

404
00:20:23,600 --> 00:20:25,720
Speaker 1: get to miss each other. But I do think that

405
00:20:25,920 --> 00:20:28,080
Speaker 1: there is a way to get it because I told Chris.

406
00:20:28,840 --> 00:20:31,320
Speaker 1: I've told Chris, like when we get to those places

407
00:20:31,359 --> 00:20:34,200
Speaker 1: again where I can't be nice to you and you

408
00:20:34,280 --> 00:20:36,040
Speaker 1: can't be nice to me and we're at a stalemate,

409
00:20:36,440 --> 00:20:38,440
Speaker 1: I will leave. And I don't want you to take

410
00:20:38,520 --> 00:20:40,640
Speaker 1: that like I'm abandoning you that I won't come back.

411
00:20:41,160 --> 00:20:44,159
Speaker 1: Like I said this in a neutral tone, like when

412
00:20:44,200 --> 00:20:46,360
Speaker 1: we were both like talking about a fight and we're

413
00:20:46,359 --> 00:20:48,560
Speaker 1: both totally neutral. I was like, you need to know

414
00:20:48,720 --> 00:20:52,560
Speaker 1: that if that happens again, I'm gonna leave because it's

415
00:20:52,600 --> 00:20:54,480
Speaker 1: not going to get better. I'm going to present you

416
00:20:54,600 --> 00:20:57,960
Speaker 1: so like it's going to build. And he sometimes takes

417
00:20:58,040 --> 00:21:00,399
Speaker 1: me leaving and I know I've taken his leave before

418
00:21:00,440 --> 00:21:03,159
Speaker 1: and getting space as abandonment. He's breaking up with me.

419
00:21:03,480 --> 00:21:05,880
Speaker 1: He's going off to start like finding a new apartment.

420
00:21:05,920 --> 00:21:08,919
Speaker 1: He's going off to call a friend and figure out

421
00:21:08,960 --> 00:21:10,520
Speaker 1: how to break up with me like I take it

422
00:21:10,600 --> 00:21:14,480
Speaker 1: as you're leaving me. It's abandoned mentastic. Yeah, but I

423
00:21:14,560 --> 00:21:16,280
Speaker 1: think that there's a way to just go, like I

424
00:21:16,880 --> 00:21:19,520
Speaker 1: still love you. I always need that reassurance. Whenever we're fighting,

425
00:21:19,520 --> 00:21:21,520
Speaker 1: I'm like, please just put a hand on my leg,

426
00:21:21,760 --> 00:21:23,760
Speaker 1: Please put a hand on my hold my hand. When

427
00:21:23,840 --> 00:21:27,200
Speaker 1: you are you know, expressing how frustrate you are with me,

428
00:21:27,320 --> 00:21:30,080
Speaker 1: Just give me something that says I'm not going anywhere,

429
00:21:30,720 --> 00:21:32,280
Speaker 1: but I'm mad at you. And I think that's what

430
00:21:32,440 --> 00:21:35,720
Speaker 1: marriage gives people in a lot of ways, is like

431
00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:38,879
Speaker 1: we but I mean, you can always get divorced, but

432
00:21:38,960 --> 00:21:42,200
Speaker 1: it gives you that reassurance of like I can't leave,

433
00:21:42,359 --> 00:21:44,000
Speaker 1: Like if I do, it's going to take a hell

434
00:21:44,040 --> 00:21:46,280
Speaker 1: of a lot more. But with your boyfriend and girlfriend

435
00:21:46,400 --> 00:21:49,200
Speaker 1: like holding a hand of saying I'm gonna step out,

436
00:21:49,280 --> 00:21:51,840
Speaker 1: I will be back. You can reach me on the phone,

437
00:21:52,080 --> 00:21:54,440
Speaker 1: but I just need some time alone. This is you know.

438
00:21:54,880 --> 00:21:57,400
Speaker 1: But that's hard to do because people are so scared

439
00:21:57,440 --> 00:21:59,639
Speaker 1: of abandonment, and they really get triggered when you leave them.

440
00:22:00,040 --> 00:22:03,400
Speaker 1: Especially I find I find like many like little mini

441
00:22:03,560 --> 00:22:06,720
Speaker 1: space breaks, even in your own apartment, can be so refreshing.

442
00:22:06,880 --> 00:22:09,560
Speaker 1: So like something as simple as like I'll go watch

443
00:22:09,640 --> 00:22:12,200
Speaker 1: baseball or football in the in the living room for

444
00:22:12,320 --> 00:22:14,720
Speaker 1: like four hours and we don't have to be on

445
00:22:14,760 --> 00:22:16,119
Speaker 1: the same couch, we don't have to be next to

446
00:22:16,160 --> 00:22:18,680
Speaker 1: each other, but I still love you your twenty feet away,

447
00:22:19,040 --> 00:22:22,160
Speaker 1: but that twenty ft can literally like that four hours

448
00:22:22,240 --> 00:22:25,119
Speaker 1: can really like refresh everything and you start and I

449
00:22:25,280 --> 00:22:28,040
Speaker 1: find it very helpful. And it sounds like it's nothing,

450
00:22:28,119 --> 00:22:30,600
Speaker 1: but it really is. Like, you know, that's the reason

451
00:22:30,680 --> 00:22:34,200
Speaker 1: why guys build man caves and women you know, fucking

452
00:22:34,520 --> 00:22:37,480
Speaker 1: whatever you guys do. We need a little break from

453
00:22:37,520 --> 00:22:40,159
Speaker 1: each other. You need you need breaks even if you

454
00:22:40,240 --> 00:22:42,640
Speaker 1: live together. And it's not because you love them less.

455
00:22:42,720 --> 00:22:45,280
Speaker 1: It's like, oh, I love you so much that with this,

456
00:22:45,760 --> 00:22:48,840
Speaker 1: you know, it's like uh, restarting a computer. Like every

457
00:22:48,920 --> 00:22:54,840
Speaker 1: you know, he'll go in the bedroom and watch his

458
00:22:55,000 --> 00:22:57,480
Speaker 1: phone or whatever, and I'll stay out here and play guitar.

459
00:22:57,640 --> 00:23:00,840
Speaker 1: Like we we take breaks, for sure, but it's hard

460
00:23:00,920 --> 00:23:05,160
Speaker 1: because sometimes I feel, I'll say, from speaking for myself,

461
00:23:05,240 --> 00:23:07,720
Speaker 1: I feel abandoned when he when he doesn't want to

462
00:23:07,760 --> 00:23:09,280
Speaker 1: be close to me. When we have the time to

463
00:23:09,320 --> 00:23:12,160
Speaker 1: be close to each other, there's like you would rather

464
00:23:12,280 --> 00:23:16,640
Speaker 1: be on your phone or watching football or whatever or um.

465
00:23:17,680 --> 00:23:20,080
Speaker 1: But whenever I expressed that to him, he usually makes

466
00:23:20,080 --> 00:23:22,920
Speaker 1: time for me. Like there's so many times where we

467
00:23:23,040 --> 00:23:25,359
Speaker 1: have been hanging out and we're watching Love Is Blind

468
00:23:25,480 --> 00:23:28,560
Speaker 1: or something, and I'll go, what's going on with rooms today?

469
00:23:28,680 --> 00:23:32,160
Speaker 1: I call I call I call um formula one racing

470
00:23:32,280 --> 00:23:35,639
Speaker 1: room rooms just because I'm like, are you watching your room? Rooms?

471
00:23:36,200 --> 00:23:41,119
Speaker 1: And it's just to like infantilize it, and uh, I'll go,

472
00:23:41,240 --> 00:23:43,520
Speaker 1: what's going on with rooms lately? And He's like, oh,

473
00:23:43,560 --> 00:23:46,320
Speaker 1: there's a race right now, but and I'm like, why

474
00:23:46,359 --> 00:23:48,480
Speaker 1: aren't you watching it? This is so that's like if

475
00:23:48,560 --> 00:23:51,240
Speaker 1: Taylor Swift like dropped a live like a new album

476
00:23:51,320 --> 00:23:54,000
Speaker 1: and I was sitting there, he will like, you know,

477
00:23:54,119 --> 00:23:56,800
Speaker 1: put aside and these really important things to make quality

478
00:23:56,840 --> 00:23:59,320
Speaker 1: time with me. And I really appreciate that. But um,

479
00:23:59,840 --> 00:24:03,040
Speaker 1: I'm totally into him having his own things that he

480
00:24:03,119 --> 00:24:05,280
Speaker 1: really cares about that he can go do. Like last night,

481
00:24:05,320 --> 00:24:08,200
Speaker 1: I was at the comedy store, I was at the improv.

482
00:24:08,280 --> 00:24:10,399
Speaker 1: I did a podcast. I did Tiger but I can

483
00:24:10,440 --> 00:24:11,960
Speaker 1: tell you what podcast it was because it went great

484
00:24:12,000 --> 00:24:15,240
Speaker 1: and um, but Tiger Belly, which will be out. I

485
00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:18,199
Speaker 1: Guess This Week. UM. You can find it on YouTube.

486
00:24:18,280 --> 00:24:22,200
Speaker 1: It's wildly popular. You'll see UM if you haven't. It's

487
00:24:22,240 --> 00:24:25,479
Speaker 1: a fun podcast with Bobby Lee and his and Khalila. UM.

488
00:24:25,600 --> 00:24:28,800
Speaker 1: I don't know about girlfriend ex girlfriend, and we got

489
00:24:28,840 --> 00:24:34,080
Speaker 1: into some couple's counts. It's funny because I was like

490
00:24:34,880 --> 00:24:37,040
Speaker 1: asking them about, like what really went wrong, because I

491
00:24:37,080 --> 00:24:38,840
Speaker 1: didn't know what they've covered on the show or not

492
00:24:38,960 --> 00:24:40,480
Speaker 1: that you know. This is a couple that's been together

493
00:24:40,560 --> 00:24:43,480
Speaker 1: for like a really long time. I think he said

494
00:24:43,520 --> 00:24:46,119
Speaker 1: like eight years or something, and they broke up recently.

495
00:24:46,200 --> 00:24:47,960
Speaker 1: They lived together for a while, they were sleeping in

496
00:24:47,960 --> 00:24:50,320
Speaker 1: the same bed for a while. They still do this podcast.

497
00:24:50,400 --> 00:24:53,080
Speaker 1: They share a lot together and they're still best friends.

498
00:24:53,280 --> 00:24:55,480
Speaker 1: And so I didn't know what they had covered on

499
00:24:55,480 --> 00:24:58,040
Speaker 1: the podcast because I wasn't caught up. But I started

500
00:24:58,080 --> 00:25:00,200
Speaker 1: like asking them about it, and he's getting into some

501
00:25:00,280 --> 00:25:03,360
Speaker 1: good stuff and he's like, I mean, hold on, people

502
00:25:03,400 --> 00:25:05,800
Speaker 1: don't want to hear this, And I go, you are

503
00:25:06,000 --> 00:25:10,879
Speaker 1: so wrong, like this, your listeners are dying for these details.

504
00:25:11,000 --> 00:25:13,719
Speaker 1: Like I know, I am, like this is some interesting

505
00:25:13,840 --> 00:25:15,720
Speaker 1: you know, they went to therapy. I was asking about

506
00:25:15,800 --> 00:25:19,200
Speaker 1: like what they discovered in their essentially, um, Bobby is

507
00:25:19,240 --> 00:25:23,520
Speaker 1: a comedian. That's what we discovered. That's the issue. He's

508
00:25:23,560 --> 00:25:26,960
Speaker 1: someone that you know, and very much like me, needs

509
00:25:27,080 --> 00:25:31,280
Speaker 1: constant validation, and when you're in a relationship, that's really

510
00:25:31,320 --> 00:25:35,879
Speaker 1: hard because we want new validation from new people and

511
00:25:36,080 --> 00:25:40,119
Speaker 1: knew we want. We're addicted to being liked and being like,

512
00:25:40,400 --> 00:25:42,399
Speaker 1: what's the next thing I want someone else to be

513
00:25:42,520 --> 00:25:44,920
Speaker 1: into me. It's not even like we really want to

514
00:25:45,200 --> 00:25:47,960
Speaker 1: fund other people or date other people. We just want

515
00:25:49,000 --> 00:25:51,080
Speaker 1: we can't. You know, when you're in a relationship, you

516
00:25:51,119 --> 00:25:53,879
Speaker 1: don't get validation constantly of how great you are and

517
00:25:54,040 --> 00:25:56,359
Speaker 1: so and we start to crave that if you know,

518
00:25:56,760 --> 00:25:58,680
Speaker 1: and you know I did. Bobby's like, I went to

519
00:25:58,800 --> 00:26:00,560
Speaker 1: I was in New York last week. I did like

520
00:26:01,000 --> 00:26:03,280
Speaker 1: eight sets in three days, and I was like, I

521
00:26:03,400 --> 00:26:06,040
Speaker 1: did eighteen last week. I did eighteen to twenty two.

522
00:26:06,040 --> 00:26:08,399
Speaker 1: I can't. I kind of lost track, and he's like,

523
00:26:08,480 --> 00:26:11,080
Speaker 1: you get it. I'm like yes, like, and he was

524
00:26:11,119 --> 00:26:12,800
Speaker 1: trying to tell me that as as a comed he's

525
00:26:12,800 --> 00:26:15,000
Speaker 1: not a comedian because he was. I was like, it's

526
00:26:15,040 --> 00:26:17,399
Speaker 1: because you didn't. You weren't loved in the way that

527
00:26:17,480 --> 00:26:19,200
Speaker 1: you could have been as a child, and for you,

528
00:26:19,440 --> 00:26:21,080
Speaker 1: you seek it out like we seek it out on

529
00:26:21,200 --> 00:26:23,439
Speaker 1: stage every night, like getting these strangers to like us

530
00:26:23,520 --> 00:26:25,440
Speaker 1: and you know, media validation, all the things we know.

531
00:26:25,840 --> 00:26:27,399
Speaker 1: And he's like, no, no, no, that's not it for me.

532
00:26:27,720 --> 00:26:30,520
Speaker 1: I just like it because I like I just I

533
00:26:30,640 --> 00:26:33,360
Speaker 1: like performing. I felt I didn't feel seen as a child.

534
00:26:33,440 --> 00:26:35,920
Speaker 1: I'm like, yes, yes, that you do like performing, but

535
00:26:35,960 --> 00:26:37,440
Speaker 1: you didn't feel seen as a child. You want to

536
00:26:37,440 --> 00:26:39,120
Speaker 1: feel seen, you want to feel liked. And we talked

537
00:26:39,119 --> 00:26:42,560
Speaker 1: about bombing and he's like, I just like, oh. Kalilah

538
00:26:42,640 --> 00:26:45,120
Speaker 1: had read read this text that Bobby had said after

539
00:26:45,200 --> 00:26:47,600
Speaker 1: a rough set at the seller. Sorry, if you listen

540
00:26:47,640 --> 00:26:49,200
Speaker 1: to podcast you'll hear all this. But it was something

541
00:26:49,320 --> 00:26:52,000
Speaker 1: like I just had a really bad set and she goes,

542
00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:54,119
Speaker 1: oh no, what happened with bad crowd? And he goes,

543
00:26:54,200 --> 00:26:56,359
Speaker 1: they just didn't like me. And I go, see, Bobby,

544
00:26:56,640 --> 00:26:58,920
Speaker 1: they didn't like you. It wasn't like they didn't like

545
00:26:59,000 --> 00:27:01,720
Speaker 1: my jokes. They didn't like you. It's about being liked

546
00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:05,000
Speaker 1: and essentially, but that was that was kind of what

547
00:27:05,080 --> 00:27:07,320
Speaker 1: we on Earth was like. And it was funny because

548
00:27:07,359 --> 00:27:10,400
Speaker 1: Kalila is dating women too, and I was like, now,

549
00:27:10,520 --> 00:27:13,159
Speaker 1: that she's you know, single, she's she's bisexual and so

550
00:27:13,440 --> 00:27:15,280
Speaker 1: or I don't know how she defines it, but she

551
00:27:15,359 --> 00:27:20,399
Speaker 1: definitely dates women. And I was like so, and we

552
00:27:20,480 --> 00:27:22,960
Speaker 1: were talking about like she kind of revealed other comedians,

553
00:27:23,040 --> 00:27:25,720
Speaker 1: comedians have asked her out, like Bobby's friends have asked

554
00:27:25,760 --> 00:27:29,320
Speaker 1: her out, and like even Bobby, yes, yes, I mean

555
00:27:29,400 --> 00:27:31,960
Speaker 1: she's gorgeous and cool and not a comedian but gets

556
00:27:31,960 --> 00:27:35,720
Speaker 1: it like it makes sense. So Bobby was like, and

557
00:27:35,920 --> 00:27:37,720
Speaker 1: I go, would you ever go down that road? And

558
00:27:37,840 --> 00:27:41,240
Speaker 1: she was like, oh, never, never, never, And I go,

559
00:27:41,359 --> 00:27:44,879
Speaker 1: out of respect for Bobby or because they're comedians, she goes, oh,

560
00:27:44,920 --> 00:27:47,679
Speaker 1: because they're comedians. She's like. She was like, I mean

561
00:27:47,920 --> 00:27:50,280
Speaker 1: it works out that it seems respectful. She didn't say that,

562
00:27:50,359 --> 00:27:52,720
Speaker 1: but that's kind of like what it implied. She was like, no,

563
00:27:53,000 --> 00:27:55,760
Speaker 1: I don't want to be dragged through that ship again,

564
00:27:55,880 --> 00:27:57,400
Speaker 1: like and I was trying to get to the root

565
00:27:57,440 --> 00:27:58,879
Speaker 1: of it, like what is the ship? And she was like,

566
00:27:59,200 --> 00:28:01,400
Speaker 1: female comics are different. I would date a female comic

567
00:28:01,480 --> 00:28:12,040
Speaker 1: And I was like um and um. But it was

568
00:28:12,119 --> 00:28:15,000
Speaker 1: an interesting conversation. But anyway, so afterwards I went and

569
00:28:15,080 --> 00:28:19,280
Speaker 1: did some sets and and Ben Gleeb met up with

570
00:28:19,400 --> 00:28:21,399
Speaker 1: me and he's going through a thing right now and

571
00:28:21,640 --> 00:28:23,520
Speaker 1: we were both talking and I was like, yeah, I

572
00:28:23,640 --> 00:28:26,520
Speaker 1: just want to sing and he was like, let's I

573
00:28:26,600 --> 00:28:28,360
Speaker 1: was like, can we go to karaoke because we've done

574
00:28:28,359 --> 00:28:30,200
Speaker 1: that before, and I was like, let's go get a

575
00:28:30,240 --> 00:28:32,320
Speaker 1: karaoke room and just sing like four songs. And then

576
00:28:32,359 --> 00:28:34,080
Speaker 1: I gotta go home because I got an early morning.

577
00:28:34,800 --> 00:28:36,119
Speaker 1: And he's like great, He's like, let's just go to

578
00:28:36,200 --> 00:28:37,840
Speaker 1: karaoke at my house and I'm like okay because he

579
00:28:37,880 --> 00:28:40,840
Speaker 1: has this whole like comedy club in his house, and

580
00:28:40,960 --> 00:28:43,040
Speaker 1: so we went to the cellar. I ran into Carlisle.

581
00:28:43,200 --> 00:28:44,920
Speaker 1: We're like, we got Carlisle on board. She's like after

582
00:28:44,960 --> 00:28:47,040
Speaker 1: my Syddle, come over. And then I got late and

583
00:28:47,080 --> 00:28:48,440
Speaker 1: I was like, can we just like sing in the

584
00:28:48,520 --> 00:28:50,240
Speaker 1: car on the right home. But it was nice because

585
00:28:50,240 --> 00:28:52,760
Speaker 1: I wrote Chris and I'm like, can I go do

586
00:28:53,040 --> 00:28:55,720
Speaker 1: karaoke tonight? And he's sitting at home waiting for me

587
00:28:55,800 --> 00:28:57,600
Speaker 1: to come home, and he's like, yeah, sure, do it.

588
00:28:57,920 --> 00:28:59,880
Speaker 1: Live your life, like have fun, and it was just

589
00:29:00,080 --> 00:29:02,960
Speaker 1: so nice to like be a be with someone who's

590
00:29:03,040 --> 00:29:06,240
Speaker 1: not going to like be resentful of that or you

591
00:29:06,320 --> 00:29:08,240
Speaker 1: know on my last night in town that I want

592
00:29:08,240 --> 00:29:10,000
Speaker 1: to go saying he was like, Nicky needs this, like

593
00:29:10,120 --> 00:29:12,200
Speaker 1: he knew and he and Ben was talking to me.

594
00:29:12,280 --> 00:29:14,680
Speaker 1: He's like, he, I guess saw me on Rya. I

595
00:29:14,720 --> 00:29:17,720
Speaker 1: guess my profile is still active on Riya And he

596
00:29:17,840 --> 00:29:19,600
Speaker 1: was like, you gotta take that down. What if Christie's

597
00:29:19,600 --> 00:29:22,360
Speaker 1: did or finds out? And I'm like, he wouldn't think

598
00:29:22,720 --> 00:29:25,920
Speaker 1: that I was on, Like he wouldn't care because he

599
00:29:25,960 --> 00:29:27,760
Speaker 1: would know that it's a glitch. Like I'm not with

600
00:29:27,920 --> 00:29:32,360
Speaker 1: someone who's like suspicious about me, like or jet like

601
00:29:32,600 --> 00:29:34,800
Speaker 1: thinking I'm going out there and doing things like it

602
00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:37,520
Speaker 1: just felt safe to go, like oh right, like most

603
00:29:37,600 --> 00:29:41,280
Speaker 1: people would go, you're on Riya, but like it's nice

604
00:29:41,320 --> 00:29:43,960
Speaker 1: to be with someone who just trust like oh yeah,

605
00:29:44,080 --> 00:29:49,640
Speaker 1: because my account, I don't know. He still from Kimmel

606
00:29:50,080 --> 00:29:53,560
Speaker 1: from your picture has Today's newspaper and what's going on?

607
00:29:55,280 --> 00:29:58,800
Speaker 1: It was a I went to this future exhibit um

608
00:30:00,120 --> 00:30:04,520
Speaker 1: four years ago. Um I was looking on his his

609
00:30:04,680 --> 00:30:08,080
Speaker 1: iPad and it downloaded all his apps like from his phone,

610
00:30:08,160 --> 00:30:10,280
Speaker 1: you know when it just downloads, and it had Tinder

611
00:30:10,360 --> 00:30:12,040
Speaker 1: on it, and I go, who is doing You're doing

612
00:30:12,160 --> 00:30:17,520
Speaker 1: Tinder on your iPad hinge or whatever, and he's like, no,

613
00:30:17,640 --> 00:30:19,880
Speaker 1: we just downloaded from the thing. And I go, someone

614
00:30:19,960 --> 00:30:22,680
Speaker 1: downloaded Hinge on their big old iPad and he was

615
00:30:22,760 --> 00:30:24,160
Speaker 1: like no, which And I was like, I trust you,

616
00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:26,520
Speaker 1: I don't care. I love It's hilarious to me that

617
00:30:26,600 --> 00:30:28,960
Speaker 1: your profile is still out there. I don't care. Um,

618
00:30:29,360 --> 00:30:34,160
Speaker 1: but yeah it was. It was nice. Um, what um

619
00:30:34,760 --> 00:30:36,360
Speaker 1: would you do last you end up singing? Did you

620
00:30:36,480 --> 00:30:38,800
Speaker 1: end up singing or not? On the car ride home?

621
00:30:38,880 --> 00:30:40,520
Speaker 1: It was funny. We took the car ride home and

622
00:30:40,560 --> 00:30:42,080
Speaker 1: I go, Ben, what do you need to sing? Because

623
00:30:42,080 --> 00:30:44,320
Speaker 1: he's going through a little bit of a thing. And

624
00:30:44,680 --> 00:30:48,160
Speaker 1: he was like, and we he had this like breakup

625
00:30:48,240 --> 00:30:51,240
Speaker 1: mix on Spotify and I was listening songs. He's like,

626
00:30:51,280 --> 00:30:53,320
Speaker 1: I don't know that one. So we listened to Post

627
00:30:53,400 --> 00:30:57,040
Speaker 1: Malon's you probably Think that You are better now, Better Now,

628
00:30:57,200 --> 00:31:01,440
Speaker 1: and then we also listened to um, if you look

629
00:31:02,000 --> 00:31:06,120
Speaker 1: the way you look so much? And I was about

630
00:31:06,200 --> 00:31:08,120
Speaker 1: to get to my first choice of a song, which

631
00:31:08,160 --> 00:31:11,520
Speaker 1: is going to be Kelly Clarkson's breakaway um, because I'm

632
00:31:11,560 --> 00:31:13,840
Speaker 1: obsessed with this version of her doing it with Sam

633
00:31:13,960 --> 00:31:16,320
Speaker 1: Smith that was on her show a few weeks ago

634
00:31:16,880 --> 00:31:19,920
Speaker 1: and and Ben was like, can I just actually read

635
00:31:19,920 --> 00:31:22,160
Speaker 1: to you this email that I sent her like really quick?

636
00:31:22,160 --> 00:31:24,400
Speaker 1: And I was like, okay, so I'm just I was like,

637
00:31:24,440 --> 00:31:26,080
Speaker 1: oh my god, this is such a scene in a

638
00:31:26,120 --> 00:31:28,200
Speaker 1: movie where this girl is like a bad friend just

639
00:31:28,280 --> 00:31:31,520
Speaker 1: wants to sing her song keeps starting it as like

640
00:31:32,160 --> 00:31:35,720
Speaker 1: spend my wings and wait, sorry what Okay, yeah, I

641
00:31:35,800 --> 00:31:41,880
Speaker 1: do think I don't think it's bad that you said that. Okay, good? Yeah,

642
00:31:42,480 --> 00:31:45,120
Speaker 1: he Oh my god, that is so funny. And then

643
00:31:45,160 --> 00:31:47,280
Speaker 1: he's like he's been so sad, he's been writing poetry

644
00:31:47,400 --> 00:31:49,719
Speaker 1: and he was like, I want you to read my poetry.

645
00:31:49,800 --> 00:31:52,800
Speaker 1: So he hands me a song. Dude, he wrote like,

646
00:31:53,080 --> 00:31:55,000
Speaker 1: I'm not Ben, if you're listening, which I'm sure you

647
00:31:55,080 --> 00:31:59,360
Speaker 1: probably are. You he wrote like, I'm not even kidding you,

648
00:31:59,480 --> 00:32:03,720
Speaker 1: like eleven pages of poems and I I have started.

649
00:32:03,760 --> 00:32:05,120
Speaker 1: I read like a couple and I handed back to

650
00:32:05,200 --> 00:32:06,880
Speaker 1: him and he goes, no, keep going like read them

651
00:32:06,920 --> 00:32:10,240
Speaker 1: all and I'm like this is so they weren't good.

652
00:32:11,000 --> 00:32:14,600
Speaker 1: But then then I I literally read remember do you

653
00:32:14,680 --> 00:32:18,840
Speaker 1: remember any of the rhymes? There was no rhymes, but

654
00:32:18,960 --> 00:32:21,360
Speaker 1: it was all like it was, um, they were really

655
00:32:25,880 --> 00:32:31,000
Speaker 1: can please I was, but it was just so funny.

656
00:32:31,040 --> 00:32:33,880
Speaker 1: I was like, he's such a comedian. He's such a

657
00:32:33,960 --> 00:32:36,760
Speaker 1: little boy like my guy friends. I just see them

658
00:32:36,840 --> 00:32:40,400
Speaker 1: as little boys sometimes where I just go it's so cute,

659
00:32:40,440 --> 00:32:42,520
Speaker 1: Like it almost looked like he was because I tried

660
00:32:42,560 --> 00:32:44,200
Speaker 1: to hand it back to him like two different times,

661
00:32:44,240 --> 00:32:45,920
Speaker 1: and he goes, you're almost done, you have three more

662
00:32:45,960 --> 00:32:48,280
Speaker 1: to go. It's like for me, if I was making

663
00:32:48,320 --> 00:32:50,920
Speaker 1: someone read my poems right and they handed it back

664
00:32:50,960 --> 00:32:52,480
Speaker 1: to me, I would I would grab it. But I

665
00:32:52,560 --> 00:32:54,680
Speaker 1: don't even like to make people look at a picture

666
00:32:54,800 --> 00:32:57,239
Speaker 1: of like a trip I took. I'm like instantly like, oh,

667
00:32:57,280 --> 00:32:59,120
Speaker 1: you don't want to be bothered by that. And Ben,

668
00:32:59,680 --> 00:33:01,720
Speaker 1: It's like, wait, there's like two more and I'm like

669
00:33:02,480 --> 00:33:04,760
Speaker 1: ten minutes reading your poems. This is the most poetry

670
00:33:04,760 --> 00:33:06,560
Speaker 1: I've read in my entire life. By the way, I've

671
00:33:06,640 --> 00:33:12,200
Speaker 1: never read this much poetry. Uh and silver Stea, do

672
00:33:12,240 --> 00:33:14,000
Speaker 1: you have any notes? Like what do you feel like,

673
00:33:14,680 --> 00:33:16,760
Speaker 1: what do you like? How do you feel about the

674
00:33:16,840 --> 00:33:19,320
Speaker 1: third like verse? Like, and You're like, dude, I just

675
00:33:19,480 --> 00:33:22,800
Speaker 1: want to sing. I was just like I loved it.

676
00:33:22,960 --> 00:33:24,959
Speaker 1: I love him so much, and I know he's going

677
00:33:25,040 --> 00:33:27,040
Speaker 1: through it. And it was it made me love him

678
00:33:27,080 --> 00:33:29,440
Speaker 1: that he is the kind of guy that will ask

679
00:33:29,480 --> 00:33:32,080
Speaker 1: you to finish reading his poems when you've clearly the

680
00:33:32,240 --> 00:33:35,360
Speaker 1: last interest. And it's like a little a little kid

681
00:33:35,400 --> 00:33:38,320
Speaker 1: who's like, mom, look at my drawing and you go,

682
00:33:38,840 --> 00:33:42,240
Speaker 1: oh wow. The snoke man looks like so happy and

683
00:33:42,320 --> 00:33:44,640
Speaker 1: there's the sun I love. And he goes, wait, what

684
00:33:44,680 --> 00:33:47,680
Speaker 1: about this part the flower? And you're like, oh, that's

685
00:33:47,720 --> 00:33:50,200
Speaker 1: good too, and it's like it just it was a

686
00:33:50,280 --> 00:33:53,000
Speaker 1: little there. All my friends are little boys. Let's go

687
00:33:53,080 --> 00:33:54,360
Speaker 1: to break and come back with a little bit of

688
00:33:54,400 --> 00:33:56,160
Speaker 1: news and then a fun game that will play because

689
00:33:56,160 --> 00:34:01,680
Speaker 1: it's wild Wednesday. All right, we're back. Let's do some news.

690
00:34:02,600 --> 00:34:08,800
Speaker 1: You oh you heard it here. It's Wednesday, folks, you

691
00:34:08,840 --> 00:34:11,640
Speaker 1: know what that means. It is Wednesday. Apparently we're having

692
00:34:11,680 --> 00:34:14,279
Speaker 1: all the swells. Hope you are to out there all right,

693
00:34:14,440 --> 00:34:18,640
Speaker 1: coming back down to no over there, right over there? Yeah,

694
00:34:20,239 --> 00:34:25,600
Speaker 1: all right, thanks Andrew. Actually this story was submitted by Andrew.

695
00:34:27,480 --> 00:34:30,480
Speaker 1: Are you reading it? But I will? So we've been

696
00:34:30,520 --> 00:34:35,879
Speaker 1: talking about why women want to have babies, and one

697
00:34:35,920 --> 00:34:39,440
Speaker 1: woman says she had an orgasm during labor and she

698
00:34:39,600 --> 00:34:42,879
Speaker 1: didn't want it to stop. A thirty six year old

699
00:34:42,880 --> 00:34:46,040
Speaker 1: woman said she entered the orgasmic state while giving birth

700
00:34:46,120 --> 00:34:49,840
Speaker 1: to her daughter, and she credits prenatal yoga classes with

701
00:34:49,960 --> 00:34:55,000
Speaker 1: the pleasurable pain free process. Pain free during birth, I

702
00:34:55,080 --> 00:34:57,759
Speaker 1: surrendered my body and I had a similar sensation to

703
00:34:57,840 --> 00:35:00,279
Speaker 1: an orgasm. It was really natural to put and the

704
00:35:00,320 --> 00:35:03,120
Speaker 1: contractions didn't feel as painful. I had this fullness and

705
00:35:03,200 --> 00:35:06,799
Speaker 1: I didn't want the feeling to stop. Um. That's weird

706
00:35:06,880 --> 00:35:09,560
Speaker 1: to be in the you know, delivery room and being

707
00:35:09,600 --> 00:35:12,040
Speaker 1: like keep going, keep going, keep going right right there,

708
00:35:12,200 --> 00:35:15,800
Speaker 1: right there, right there, and your baby is like emerging.

709
00:35:16,200 --> 00:35:19,439
Speaker 1: The first thing your baby here is is your mom coming. Yeah.

710
00:35:19,560 --> 00:35:21,560
Speaker 1: It's like put the baby back in, then back out,

711
00:35:21,920 --> 00:35:24,000
Speaker 1: then back in. Oh, put the baby foot in. Oh

712
00:35:24,080 --> 00:35:26,960
Speaker 1: my God. Said it was harder than a marathon, and

713
00:35:27,080 --> 00:35:33,240
Speaker 1: I've run many. Um. Yeah, So prenatal yoga classes famously

714
00:35:33,280 --> 00:35:36,560
Speaker 1: help women prepare for pain three labor um. If you

715
00:35:36,640 --> 00:35:39,279
Speaker 1: allow birthing hormones to work for you, then a woman

716
00:35:39,360 --> 00:35:41,600
Speaker 1: can come into a state of bliss or labor land.

717
00:35:42,320 --> 00:35:44,760
Speaker 1: The pain is then not so intense because the endorphins

718
00:35:44,800 --> 00:35:47,759
Speaker 1: are flowing and there is no fear. It's said that

719
00:35:47,880 --> 00:35:50,520
Speaker 1: the endorphins are ten times stronger than morphine and that

720
00:35:50,600 --> 00:35:54,000
Speaker 1: working for you. Wow, it does help. If you have

721
00:35:54,080 --> 00:35:57,680
Speaker 1: a butt plug too. I heard giving birth, I think

722
00:35:57,719 --> 00:36:00,520
Speaker 1: I would kind of like labor, and I mean cramps

723
00:36:00,640 --> 00:36:03,600
Speaker 1: or hell if you give if you have a butt

724
00:36:03,600 --> 00:36:06,840
Speaker 1: plug in while you give birth, is what you're saying. Like,

725
00:36:07,000 --> 00:36:09,279
Speaker 1: I just love the idea of like, let's do it right,

726
00:36:10,239 --> 00:36:14,680
Speaker 1: But I don't know, but I don't I guess I

727
00:36:14,719 --> 00:36:17,239
Speaker 1: don't really understand what the pain is when you give birth.

728
00:36:17,400 --> 00:36:20,200
Speaker 1: Is it the is it the cramping contractions or is

729
00:36:20,280 --> 00:36:23,920
Speaker 1: it the ripping? And I always thought it was like

730
00:36:24,040 --> 00:36:28,040
Speaker 1: your your pelvic floors opening, so it's like your bones

731
00:36:28,040 --> 00:36:35,080
Speaker 1: are shifting, Oh God, and your vagina rips. Yeah. Yeah,

732
00:36:35,600 --> 00:36:38,640
Speaker 1: that's the epplesiastic me, I think is what they do

733
00:36:38,719 --> 00:36:41,880
Speaker 1: when they cut your taint um and just make it

734
00:36:41,920 --> 00:36:44,680
Speaker 1: all one. I mean it's crazy. Um, and I can't

735
00:36:44,719 --> 00:36:46,400
Speaker 1: believe we do it. I can't believe we've done it

736
00:36:46,520 --> 00:36:50,640
Speaker 1: for millennia and we'll continue to do it. Um. Yeah,

737
00:36:50,719 --> 00:36:54,320
Speaker 1: I it feels good, but it feels like the most

738
00:36:54,800 --> 00:36:58,320
Speaker 1: like release ever because that's what orgasm is for me

739
00:36:58,440 --> 00:37:00,440
Speaker 1: at least, It's like it just feels like I'm finally

740
00:37:01,200 --> 00:37:04,160
Speaker 1: surrendering to this thing. Like because I fought off orgasms

741
00:37:04,280 --> 00:37:06,080
Speaker 1: my whole life. I felt like like they were just

742
00:37:06,160 --> 00:37:08,120
Speaker 1: felt like this is I don't know what's going to

743
00:37:08,200 --> 00:37:10,120
Speaker 1: happen on the other side of this whatever. This like

744
00:37:10,640 --> 00:37:14,000
Speaker 1: boiling like teapot is, I don't I'd rather just turn

745
00:37:14,080 --> 00:37:16,320
Speaker 1: down the heat than like see what happens when it

746
00:37:16,400 --> 00:37:18,400
Speaker 1: starts whistling, you know, like I don't want it to

747
00:37:18,760 --> 00:37:21,720
Speaker 1: boil over. And you know, that was always so scary

748
00:37:21,760 --> 00:37:24,359
Speaker 1: to me, and I think some I don't know why

749
00:37:24,480 --> 00:37:27,600
Speaker 1: more people why I don't hear that more often that

750
00:37:27,760 --> 00:37:29,840
Speaker 1: like having an orgasm is terrifying because you feel like

751
00:37:29,880 --> 00:37:33,319
Speaker 1: you're gonna ship yourself, you're gonna screw, you're gonna say expletives,

752
00:37:33,360 --> 00:37:36,000
Speaker 1: you're gonna fart, you're gonna like I just was too

753
00:37:36,040 --> 00:37:38,759
Speaker 1: scared of everything. And I think that, um, like what

754
00:37:38,880 --> 00:37:40,440
Speaker 1: she's saying, Yeah, you just have to like let go

755
00:37:41,239 --> 00:37:44,520
Speaker 1: and it's a really and it would it would feel

756
00:37:44,520 --> 00:37:47,440
Speaker 1: like the biggest you know, I love taking like I

757
00:37:47,520 --> 00:37:49,520
Speaker 1: like anal because it feels like you're taking a really

758
00:37:49,560 --> 00:37:52,520
Speaker 1: big ship, which feels really good. It's not like why

759
00:37:52,560 --> 00:37:54,400
Speaker 1: I like it. I think that shipping actually feels more

760
00:37:54,440 --> 00:37:56,640
Speaker 1: like anal than adol feels like shitting. If that makes sense,

761
00:37:57,400 --> 00:38:02,920
Speaker 1: Um doesn't make sense. I don't know. But uh, why

762
00:38:03,000 --> 00:38:06,280
Speaker 1: don't men ever? I never hear men saying they're scared

763
00:38:06,360 --> 00:38:08,920
Speaker 1: to come like women. I have heard they're like, I

764
00:38:08,960 --> 00:38:10,879
Speaker 1: don't need to come. It's like too much, like it's

765
00:38:10,960 --> 00:38:13,800
Speaker 1: too sensitive. Like I have a friend now who's like,

766
00:38:13,920 --> 00:38:15,840
Speaker 1: it just feels like I'm being tickled, like in a

767
00:38:15,960 --> 00:38:18,919
Speaker 1: bad way. It's just too much sensitivity, and they don't

768
00:38:18,960 --> 00:38:22,960
Speaker 1: want to come. Why don't never fight it? It's because

769
00:38:23,080 --> 00:38:26,879
Speaker 1: guys masturbate and come thousands of times before they ever

770
00:38:26,960 --> 00:38:30,880
Speaker 1: have sex, from the ages of thirteen, even before that,

771
00:38:31,160 --> 00:38:33,880
Speaker 1: even when you masturbate like I feel like it. I

772
00:38:34,000 --> 00:38:36,560
Speaker 1: also think I think it's because it takes you, guys less.

773
00:38:36,840 --> 00:38:40,040
Speaker 1: It takes less sensitivity and less pressure and less it

774
00:38:40,160 --> 00:38:42,680
Speaker 1: takes less to make you guys come, and it's not

775
00:38:42,800 --> 00:38:53,160
Speaker 1: as intense when it happens, so you're not there's no fear. Yeah, yes, yes,

776
00:38:53,440 --> 00:38:55,560
Speaker 1: but I think they're but it's not they're not scared

777
00:38:55,600 --> 00:38:57,520
Speaker 1: of the feeling of coming, you know what I mean.

778
00:38:58,840 --> 00:39:01,440
Speaker 1: I dated one guy who would not come, who refused

779
00:39:01,480 --> 00:39:05,080
Speaker 1: to come and he it was really weird. He was

780
00:39:05,080 --> 00:39:06,960
Speaker 1: always like saving it, like I'll do it another time,

781
00:39:07,000 --> 00:39:09,440
Speaker 1: like let's we'll do it then when it's like this

782
00:39:09,560 --> 00:39:14,280
Speaker 1: kind of sex. And I found out later from talking

783
00:39:14,320 --> 00:39:16,480
Speaker 1: to therapists and who knows that this is his story,

784
00:39:16,600 --> 00:39:20,280
Speaker 1: but like when he comes, he feels like that woman

785
00:39:20,400 --> 00:39:22,160
Speaker 1: now like has a piece of him, and that he

786
00:39:22,280 --> 00:39:25,279
Speaker 1: owes her something that it's like it's now like and

787
00:39:25,400 --> 00:39:28,600
Speaker 1: and the truth is like you do like men don't

788
00:39:28,719 --> 00:39:31,520
Speaker 1: understand this. When you like have sex with a woman,

789
00:39:32,600 --> 00:39:35,440
Speaker 1: she does feel like this closeness for you that you

790
00:39:35,600 --> 00:39:37,480
Speaker 1: might not feel for her, and there is going to

791
00:39:37,600 --> 00:39:39,719
Speaker 1: be a kind of an expectation on the other side

792
00:39:39,760 --> 00:39:41,279
Speaker 1: of that, whether you want to want it or not.

793
00:39:41,440 --> 00:39:43,800
Speaker 1: A lot of time you feel though that it's closer

794
00:39:43,920 --> 00:39:47,840
Speaker 1: if they have an orgasm, like does that maybe I

795
00:39:47,920 --> 00:39:50,480
Speaker 1: think that in his mind that made it like that

796
00:39:50,800 --> 00:39:53,799
Speaker 1: sex to him that is like actually like I'm gonna

797
00:39:54,160 --> 00:39:56,120
Speaker 1: and it's like, yeah, you have the potential to get

798
00:39:56,160 --> 00:39:58,879
Speaker 1: that person pregnant, So it makes sense that that act

799
00:39:58,960 --> 00:40:01,440
Speaker 1: would make you feel like I'm going to be locked

800
00:40:01,480 --> 00:40:04,040
Speaker 1: into this woman forever, and so he would just put

801
00:40:04,080 --> 00:40:06,439
Speaker 1: it off because I think he knew the inevitable, which

802
00:40:06,600 --> 00:40:09,560
Speaker 1: was when he did eventually come. And he did this

803
00:40:09,680 --> 00:40:12,400
Speaker 1: to me multiple times in our course of our dating,

804
00:40:13,040 --> 00:40:15,959
Speaker 1: that he would get he would change his mind about

805
00:40:16,000 --> 00:40:17,880
Speaker 1: me as soon as he came. He would go, I

806
00:40:18,200 --> 00:40:21,400
Speaker 1: this is moving too fast, literally in bed holding each other,

807
00:40:21,440 --> 00:40:23,239
Speaker 1: after we'd have sex, he would change his mind. And

808
00:40:23,880 --> 00:40:26,640
Speaker 1: it was something that you know, I just was like, oh,

809
00:40:26,680 --> 00:40:28,560
Speaker 1: I'll never trust this again. Not that he gave me

810
00:40:28,640 --> 00:40:30,080
Speaker 1: the chance to trust it again, but I was like,

811
00:40:30,719 --> 00:40:33,920
Speaker 1: I can't. Yeah, it was. It was so weird. But

812
00:40:33,960 --> 00:40:36,040
Speaker 1: it happened twice where the first time I didn't see

813
00:40:36,040 --> 00:40:37,360
Speaker 1: it coming, and then the second time I was like,

814
00:40:37,560 --> 00:40:39,800
Speaker 1: are you going to change after this? And he's like,

815
00:40:39,840 --> 00:40:42,640
Speaker 1: I don't think so, but maybe, And then we did it,

816
00:40:42,760 --> 00:40:45,400
Speaker 1: and then right afterwards I was like, how are you feeling?

817
00:40:45,600 --> 00:40:48,320
Speaker 1: And he was like, I just think we rushed this,

818
00:40:48,440 --> 00:40:54,400
Speaker 1: and I'm like, are you fucking I just flew across

819
00:40:54,480 --> 00:40:57,160
Speaker 1: the country and changed my life to make this happen,

820
00:40:57,200 --> 00:41:03,080
Speaker 1: Like it was just so devastating, but I hate you,

821
00:41:03,960 --> 00:41:06,760
Speaker 1: like it's such a such a sad like it should

822
00:41:06,760 --> 00:41:10,480
Speaker 1: be the most like happy, joyous moment and it's just

823
00:41:10,680 --> 00:41:15,040
Speaker 1: nothing but sadness and despair. Oh god, it's I mean there,

824
00:41:15,160 --> 00:41:17,120
Speaker 1: it makes sense. I mean I talked about him, my

825
00:41:17,160 --> 00:41:19,360
Speaker 1: special It makes sense because it's time to move on

826
00:41:19,440 --> 00:41:21,440
Speaker 1: to the next woman. You already got this one pregnant.

827
00:41:21,480 --> 00:41:24,239
Speaker 1: It makes sense. Why you guys your brains shift that way? No,

828
00:41:24,440 --> 00:41:28,920
Speaker 1: what's the next news story? Okay, the next news story?

829
00:41:29,120 --> 00:41:36,120
Speaker 1: Do you guys, wife having baby? Do you remember who

830
00:41:36,280 --> 00:41:43,080
Speaker 1: Billy McFarland is the singer. No, it's the man behind

831
00:41:43,600 --> 00:41:49,520
Speaker 1: the infamous fire festival. Yes, of course, of course. Apparently

832
00:41:50,800 --> 00:41:54,800
Speaker 1: this week he teased a new project. Uh he was

833
00:41:54,920 --> 00:41:59,520
Speaker 1: on TikTok and um. Of course he basically from what

834
00:41:59,680 --> 00:42:03,640
Speaker 1: source as are saying, planning another festival. Hell yeah, because

835
00:42:03,680 --> 00:42:07,680
Speaker 1: which to that? Why wouldn't you trust I actually want

836
00:42:07,680 --> 00:42:09,600
Speaker 1: to go to that one? I got it. I mean

837
00:42:09,680 --> 00:42:12,640
Speaker 1: maybe you know you go through you to go be

838
00:42:12,800 --> 00:42:15,920
Speaker 1: an influencer at that one and go and get and

839
00:42:16,040 --> 00:42:18,000
Speaker 1: you wouldn't you would be happy with that meal? I

840
00:42:18,080 --> 00:42:20,800
Speaker 1: saw that meal. I remember seeing that like bread and cheese,

841
00:42:21,040 --> 00:42:23,560
Speaker 1: and I was like, Andrew would probably think this is

842
00:42:24,840 --> 00:42:29,560
Speaker 1: dynam like over here. Yeah, yeah, that I would not

843
00:42:29,760 --> 00:42:33,239
Speaker 1: be upset that, Yeah, it'd be great. Were so like

844
00:42:33,360 --> 00:42:36,360
Speaker 1: thinking they're gonna die. It's like you're not. You're fine.

845
00:42:36,760 --> 00:42:38,840
Speaker 1: Like that guy knew he'd be up to more. That

846
00:42:38,920 --> 00:42:42,799
Speaker 1: guy is that's the kind of go get her attitude

847
00:42:42,880 --> 00:42:44,960
Speaker 1: that I just don't have. That I envy, Like he

848
00:42:45,120 --> 00:42:48,840
Speaker 1: is operating from prison making a new festival. Like I

849
00:42:49,080 --> 00:42:51,759
Speaker 1: was even walking past stores the other day on the

850
00:42:51,960 --> 00:42:54,640
Speaker 1: street and I was saying to Chris, like, god, opening

851
00:42:54,680 --> 00:42:59,080
Speaker 1: a store like managing a store, and like opening a

852
00:42:59,200 --> 00:43:02,160
Speaker 1: store is like I could never do that, And He's like,

853
00:43:02,239 --> 00:43:04,400
Speaker 1: I would love to do it. I'm like you would.

854
00:43:04,719 --> 00:43:08,759
Speaker 1: I could never When people just like love organizing things

855
00:43:08,880 --> 00:43:11,120
Speaker 1: and putting things together. Thank God for those people. The

856
00:43:11,160 --> 00:43:13,800
Speaker 1: world would not run without you. But man, that is

857
00:43:14,239 --> 00:43:17,520
Speaker 1: to get out of here. If I have to refill

858
00:43:17,560 --> 00:43:20,040
Speaker 1: a shelf, that shelf would never that would be an

859
00:43:20,040 --> 00:43:25,399
Speaker 1: empty shelf. Even girl's name Tori. Do do you think

860
00:43:25,920 --> 00:43:28,600
Speaker 1: the Firefest? He'll probably try to do it in like

861
00:43:29,200 --> 00:43:31,640
Speaker 1: I don't know, New Jersey. Like he's not gonna go

862
00:43:32,440 --> 00:43:34,359
Speaker 1: He's not going Ham again. He's not going to try

863
00:43:34,400 --> 00:43:36,640
Speaker 1: to do an island. Yeah. I mean, like this is

864
00:43:36,719 --> 00:43:39,000
Speaker 1: just ridiculous. If anyone trusts him, I just can't. I

865
00:43:39,040 --> 00:43:42,359
Speaker 1: can't even imagine anyone going into this thing. That's enough news.

866
00:43:42,440 --> 00:43:46,560
Speaker 1: Let's get to the game. Est parrel. Noah picked two

867
00:43:46,600 --> 00:43:50,600
Speaker 1: cards set us up for some storytelling. This is so

868
00:43:50,800 --> 00:43:52,919
Speaker 1: funny because it goes right with what we've been talking

869
00:43:52,960 --> 00:43:56,200
Speaker 1: about today. And you didn't see the cards when I

870
00:43:56,280 --> 00:44:06,440
Speaker 1: picked them, No, I did not, David Blaine, Yeah, alright.

871
00:44:06,600 --> 00:44:11,200
Speaker 1: So the prompt card is close, share something close to

872
00:44:11,280 --> 00:44:15,160
Speaker 1: your heart, and the other card is the hardest lesson

873
00:44:15,360 --> 00:44:21,040
Speaker 1: I've learned about love, The hardest lesson that I've learned

874
00:44:21,120 --> 00:44:26,600
Speaker 1: about love. Okay, the hardest lesson I've learned about love

875
00:44:27,080 --> 00:44:31,320
Speaker 1: is that I mean that you have to say goodbye

876
00:44:31,440 --> 00:44:35,040
Speaker 1: to everything, like at some point you're not you're either

877
00:44:35,160 --> 00:44:38,040
Speaker 1: going to die or they're going to die, or you're

878
00:44:38,040 --> 00:44:39,560
Speaker 1: going to break up or they're going to break up

879
00:44:39,600 --> 00:44:42,880
Speaker 1: with you, or that honeymoon period will end in your relationship,

880
00:44:43,120 --> 00:44:44,840
Speaker 1: or you will move out of that a place that

881
00:44:45,000 --> 00:44:47,120
Speaker 1: brings you a lot of good memories. Your dog will die,

882
00:44:47,200 --> 00:44:52,759
Speaker 1: like in a in a relationship, there are so many

883
00:44:53,239 --> 00:44:56,560
Speaker 1: small deaths, and it's like it's like grieving all the

884
00:44:56,680 --> 00:45:00,520
Speaker 1: time for just different things of like, oh, like even

885
00:45:00,600 --> 00:45:02,040
Speaker 1: this place that I have with Chris, right, now in

886
00:45:02,160 --> 00:45:04,799
Speaker 1: Santa Monticu. It's like, I'm already sad about moving out

887
00:45:04,800 --> 00:45:06,600
Speaker 1: of here because we have so many memories here, and

888
00:45:06,680 --> 00:45:09,799
Speaker 1: I just think, Um, I guess, like that's the hardest lesson,

889
00:45:09,960 --> 00:45:15,000
Speaker 1: is like it's it's um, yeah, And the more you

890
00:45:15,120 --> 00:45:17,719
Speaker 1: love someone, the more you risk being sad when they're gone.

891
00:45:17,840 --> 00:45:20,000
Speaker 1: And like every time you add someone to your list

892
00:45:20,080 --> 00:45:21,840
Speaker 1: of things that you love, whether it's a pet or

893
00:45:21,960 --> 00:45:25,399
Speaker 1: a person, you're just signing up for pain down the road.

894
00:45:26,000 --> 00:45:28,239
Speaker 1: You You're just you no matter what people go. I

895
00:45:28,239 --> 00:45:30,320
Speaker 1: don't want to I don't want to date again because

896
00:45:31,080 --> 00:45:33,279
Speaker 1: I can't handle a breakup. I don't want to go

897
00:45:33,320 --> 00:45:35,399
Speaker 1: through the pain. It's like, even if it works out,

898
00:45:35,440 --> 00:45:37,560
Speaker 1: there's gonna be pain because when he was gonna die,

899
00:45:38,040 --> 00:45:40,440
Speaker 1: you know, like it's it's always gonna be pain, no

900
00:45:40,560 --> 00:45:43,719
Speaker 1: matter if it's successful. So I guess that's the hardest lesson,

901
00:45:45,920 --> 00:45:49,879
Speaker 1: h the hardest lesson about love spoken from the heart.

902
00:45:50,040 --> 00:45:55,680
Speaker 1: That's that's the thing. Um, I think it's the hardest

903
00:45:55,880 --> 00:45:59,319
Speaker 1: lesson I've ever learned, is that the more you give

904
00:45:59,480 --> 00:46:02,719
Speaker 1: doesn't you're gonna get more in return. And that's the

905
00:46:02,800 --> 00:46:05,279
Speaker 1: hardest thing. So like, even if you show them so

906
00:46:05,560 --> 00:46:08,880
Speaker 1: hard that you love them and you're fucking running in

907
00:46:08,960 --> 00:46:12,440
Speaker 1: the rain for them or crying on their face whatever.

908
00:46:12,600 --> 00:46:16,880
Speaker 1: Like the more you give doesn't doesn't equal the return

909
00:46:17,000 --> 00:46:19,839
Speaker 1: value you're gonna get. And that's hard because you would

910
00:46:19,880 --> 00:46:23,000
Speaker 1: think why not, why wouldn't that work? I'm giving everything

911
00:46:23,239 --> 00:46:26,200
Speaker 1: And sometimes then that's hard. That's a hard lesson to learn,

912
00:46:26,600 --> 00:46:28,799
Speaker 1: and I feel like everyone learns that one. It's really hard,

913
00:46:29,120 --> 00:46:33,560
Speaker 1: like really bad. Yeah, there's no that some people just yeah,

914
00:46:33,920 --> 00:46:36,759
Speaker 1: there's some people think that they get broken up with

915
00:46:36,840 --> 00:46:39,040
Speaker 1: and there's like there's something I can do, and it's like, no,

916
00:46:39,880 --> 00:46:41,880
Speaker 1: whatever they're telling you is the reason they're breaking up

917
00:46:41,920 --> 00:46:45,040
Speaker 1: with you, it's that's not it. It's a lot of

918
00:46:45,080 --> 00:46:46,880
Speaker 1: other things. And you're like, I'll fix that thing, and

919
00:46:46,920 --> 00:46:50,120
Speaker 1: they go, don't bother because there's you know, it's just

920
00:46:50,400 --> 00:46:55,200
Speaker 1: usually not that it's too late. What the person to

921
00:46:55,360 --> 00:46:57,960
Speaker 1: like pull out a whole list of this is why

922
00:46:57,960 --> 00:46:59,480
Speaker 1: I'm breaking up with you. You know, you're just like

923
00:47:00,120 --> 00:47:02,319
Speaker 1: we don't vide this way, and like I could fix

924
00:47:02,400 --> 00:47:05,799
Speaker 1: and then it's like if you pulled out, you would

925
00:47:05,840 --> 00:47:09,480
Speaker 1: kill the person. But you have to give a reason

926
00:47:09,560 --> 00:47:11,640
Speaker 1: because people always want a reason. When you're breaking up

927
00:47:11,680 --> 00:47:13,080
Speaker 1: with them and you go, well, i'll fix that. I

928
00:47:13,120 --> 00:47:14,840
Speaker 1: can fix that. I'm so you know when they go

929
00:47:15,680 --> 00:47:17,760
Speaker 1: you know. The saddest thing is when I've had friends

930
00:47:17,840 --> 00:47:22,000
Speaker 1: who like get like they the guy will cheat on

931
00:47:22,120 --> 00:47:24,839
Speaker 1: them because the guy just wants out and he wants

932
00:47:24,880 --> 00:47:27,279
Speaker 1: a reason to get out, and so he gets caught

933
00:47:27,360 --> 00:47:29,560
Speaker 1: cheating or he tells her and because he knows that's

934
00:47:29,600 --> 00:47:32,279
Speaker 1: a deal breaker and the girl's like, I'm willing to

935
00:47:32,400 --> 00:47:34,680
Speaker 1: forgive you, and he's like, oh, come on, han no,

936
00:47:35,160 --> 00:47:38,160
Speaker 1: like I'm not gonna it's over, Like the guy still

937
00:47:38,200 --> 00:47:40,080
Speaker 1: has to end it like that's a really and the

938
00:47:40,239 --> 00:47:42,560
Speaker 1: girls do that two men too, where it's like it's

939
00:47:42,560 --> 00:47:44,880
Speaker 1: just funny if that happens and you forgive him and

940
00:47:44,960 --> 00:47:46,839
Speaker 1: he's like, actually that's fourth on my list. You're too

941
00:47:46,920 --> 00:47:50,759
Speaker 1: forgiving And he's like, okay, well, I mean that is

942
00:47:50,800 --> 00:47:52,719
Speaker 1: a problem, like you're a push over. People kind of

943
00:47:52,800 --> 00:47:55,360
Speaker 1: don't like that. Um, but that that happens on no,

944
00:47:55,600 --> 00:47:59,759
Speaker 1: what about you? Um, I think it kind of goes

945
00:47:59,840 --> 00:48:03,319
Speaker 1: in line with, um, what you guys are saying. But um,

946
00:48:03,640 --> 00:48:06,040
Speaker 1: the hardest thing that I've learned is that like you

947
00:48:06,200 --> 00:48:08,759
Speaker 1: have to and it's kind of cliche. You have to

948
00:48:08,880 --> 00:48:13,440
Speaker 1: like let go of your loves and um, whenever they

949
00:48:13,520 --> 00:48:15,400
Speaker 1: come back to you, it's always going to be stronger.

950
00:48:15,520 --> 00:48:18,080
Speaker 1: Like you have to let people exist on their own

951
00:48:18,800 --> 00:48:21,400
Speaker 1: for them to be better for their relationship, including myself.

952
00:48:23,040 --> 00:48:25,200
Speaker 1: That's that's kind of the most you have to let go.

953
00:48:25,360 --> 00:48:27,920
Speaker 1: You can't control things as much as you wish you can,

954
00:48:28,239 --> 00:48:31,399
Speaker 1: and you certainly can't control someone else. And so many

955
00:48:31,440 --> 00:48:33,879
Speaker 1: of my friends and my girls chat when we talk

956
00:48:33,880 --> 00:48:37,399
Speaker 1: about our boyfriends or husbands or whatever, it's so much

957
00:48:37,480 --> 00:48:39,320
Speaker 1: of like I wish he would do this thing. I

958
00:48:39,400 --> 00:48:42,280
Speaker 1: need to confront him about this, but instead we always

959
00:48:42,360 --> 00:48:44,960
Speaker 1: get to I need to get to a place where

960
00:48:45,000 --> 00:48:46,960
Speaker 1: he can figure it out on his own and think

961
00:48:47,120 --> 00:48:49,480
Speaker 1: and think that it's his idea that I asked him

962
00:48:49,560 --> 00:48:52,520
Speaker 1: to change, you know, like that's and that's usually giving

963
00:48:52,560 --> 00:48:56,000
Speaker 1: a person the space to go, um, just giving them

964
00:48:56,080 --> 00:48:58,720
Speaker 1: space or give not trying to change them and actually

965
00:48:59,360 --> 00:49:01,200
Speaker 1: and saying how you feel as opposed to like you

966
00:49:01,360 --> 00:49:03,640
Speaker 1: never do this and being like it makes me sad

967
00:49:04,400 --> 00:49:07,640
Speaker 1: that I don't get to you know that you don't

968
00:49:07,719 --> 00:49:09,560
Speaker 1: take out the trash as much like it just it

969
00:49:09,680 --> 00:49:12,759
Speaker 1: bums me out and let them do what do something

970
00:49:12,800 --> 00:49:15,160
Speaker 1: with your feelings as opposed to you need to take

971
00:49:15,200 --> 00:49:17,680
Speaker 1: out the trash more like let them figure out. Oh,

972
00:49:17,760 --> 00:49:19,440
Speaker 1: if I took out the trash, maybe she wouldn't be

973
00:49:19,520 --> 00:49:23,040
Speaker 1: sad like that in love though, to like be able

974
00:49:23,120 --> 00:49:26,920
Speaker 1: to have a life outside of the relationship, because in

975
00:49:27,040 --> 00:49:30,160
Speaker 1: my past, my relationship was everything. We would hang out

976
00:49:30,400 --> 00:49:33,480
Speaker 1: all day, twenty four hours, do everything together. But now

977
00:49:33,560 --> 00:49:37,480
Speaker 1: I see the advantage of live your own lives, go

978
00:49:37,640 --> 00:49:40,040
Speaker 1: on the Tiger Belly podcast and then go to karaoke

979
00:49:40,320 --> 00:49:42,640
Speaker 1: and you know, like have your own fun and then

980
00:49:42,719 --> 00:49:44,719
Speaker 1: you come home and you have something to share. Would

981
00:49:44,719 --> 00:49:46,920
Speaker 1: not be in trouble when I get home, not have

982
00:49:47,160 --> 00:49:49,040
Speaker 1: like not have it be I mean, I was worried

983
00:49:49,040 --> 00:49:51,040
Speaker 1: about that. The first couple of times I went out

984
00:49:51,080 --> 00:49:53,080
Speaker 1: to dinner with friends here and Chris and I had

985
00:49:53,160 --> 00:49:55,560
Speaker 1: kind of decided, oh, we'll go to dinner together every

986
00:49:55,640 --> 00:49:56,960
Speaker 1: night that we can. And it was one of the

987
00:49:57,000 --> 00:49:59,320
Speaker 1: first nights here and I got asked to go to

988
00:49:59,400 --> 00:50:01,640
Speaker 1: dinner with some ends and I didn't feel comfortable inviting

989
00:50:01,719 --> 00:50:03,440
Speaker 1: Chris because it wasn't my dinner to do that, And

990
00:50:03,520 --> 00:50:05,680
Speaker 1: I was so scared all the dinner that like I

991
00:50:05,760 --> 00:50:07,040
Speaker 1: was gonna come home and he was going to be

992
00:50:07,239 --> 00:50:09,640
Speaker 1: kind of in a bad mood because even though he

993
00:50:09,680 --> 00:50:12,440
Speaker 1: said it's fine, Like was he fine about it? And

994
00:50:12,480 --> 00:50:14,239
Speaker 1: I was so glad when I walked in, and like

995
00:50:14,360 --> 00:50:17,400
Speaker 1: the energy was just like no resentment. So fine. How

996
00:50:17,560 --> 00:50:19,880
Speaker 1: is dinner? I hope you had fun? Like, ah, what

997
00:50:20,040 --> 00:50:22,160
Speaker 1: a fucking relief to have someone that allows you to

998
00:50:22,239 --> 00:50:28,239
Speaker 1: do that final thought. Um, it sucks when you have

999
00:50:28,400 --> 00:50:30,759
Speaker 1: that feeling that you're gonna come back and be in

1000
00:50:30,840 --> 00:50:33,120
Speaker 1: trouble and and then you end up not in trouble

1001
00:50:33,160 --> 00:50:34,840
Speaker 1: and you're like, no, that is how life should be.

1002
00:50:35,000 --> 00:50:38,800
Speaker 1: You shouldn't be in trouble like you like. But I

1003
00:50:38,960 --> 00:50:42,040
Speaker 1: have those same intrusive thoughts of like I'm fucking up,

1004
00:50:42,320 --> 00:50:44,359
Speaker 1: I'm not I gotta get home. I gotta get home.

1005
00:50:44,400 --> 00:50:46,560
Speaker 1: They're gonna be piste, They're gonna and and nine at

1006
00:50:46,600 --> 00:50:49,400
Speaker 1: ten times. They're never pissed, but every time I go

1007
00:50:49,640 --> 00:50:53,360
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be in trouble, this time is different text

1008
00:50:53,440 --> 00:50:55,840
Speaker 1: message and you're like, did they is this? There's not

1009
00:50:55,880 --> 00:50:58,560
Speaker 1: an explanation mark, so they're definitely mad about that, Like

1010
00:50:58,719 --> 00:51:01,000
Speaker 1: what's the tone of this extent? You just think they're

1011
00:51:01,000 --> 00:51:04,000
Speaker 1: gonna be mad at you, and like, what aren't people

1012
00:51:04,080 --> 00:51:06,239
Speaker 1: allowed to be mad at us? To like? I want that.

1013
00:51:06,440 --> 00:51:08,880
Speaker 1: I want that ability. I want that superpower that some

1014
00:51:09,000 --> 00:51:11,960
Speaker 1: people have where if someone's mad at them, they let

1015
00:51:12,080 --> 00:51:14,080
Speaker 1: there just like, okay, be mad at me, and they

1016
00:51:14,120 --> 00:51:16,719
Speaker 1: don't take it. It's like you're a bad person. And

1017
00:51:17,239 --> 00:51:18,960
Speaker 1: I take Chris as when he is mad at me,

1018
00:51:19,040 --> 00:51:22,480
Speaker 1: I think he I jumped to the conclusion he's disgusted

1019
00:51:22,560 --> 00:51:25,080
Speaker 1: with me, he hates me, he doesn't want to be

1020
00:51:25,160 --> 00:51:27,320
Speaker 1: around me. He can't even believe he's ever been in

1021
00:51:27,360 --> 00:51:29,560
Speaker 1: a relationship with me, because I'm like, if you're mad

1022
00:51:29,600 --> 00:51:32,160
Speaker 1: at me one time and disappointed at me, let's say

1023
00:51:32,160 --> 00:51:35,320
Speaker 1: he's disappointed. I'm like, he he'll never get over this.

1024
00:51:35,760 --> 00:51:38,000
Speaker 1: That's where my mind goes where I'm like and he's like,

1025
00:51:38,080 --> 00:51:41,400
Speaker 1: can you please just not go all to those places?

1026
00:51:41,480 --> 00:51:43,800
Speaker 1: But it's so hard for me not to where I

1027
00:51:43,880 --> 00:51:47,160
Speaker 1: just think anyone who's mad at me, I'll never win

1028
00:51:47,280 --> 00:51:51,040
Speaker 1: them over again. I'll I've lost it completely. I'm okay

1029
00:51:51,160 --> 00:51:53,840
Speaker 1: with Like, I had a fan right to me the

1030
00:51:53,920 --> 00:51:55,719
Speaker 1: other day and say something that was a little bit

1031
00:51:55,800 --> 00:51:59,239
Speaker 1: like accusatory and like something I did that bummed them out.

1032
00:52:00,080 --> 00:52:04,040
Speaker 1: Something I said, and usually that would spot make me

1033
00:52:04,160 --> 00:52:06,120
Speaker 1: spiral and I would hold on to it all day.

1034
00:52:06,840 --> 00:52:08,759
Speaker 1: But I was just like that person is allowed to

1035
00:52:08,880 --> 00:52:10,920
Speaker 1: be mad at me. I don't know, like I'm It

1036
00:52:11,040 --> 00:52:13,200
Speaker 1: was something about I said something about my feelings and

1037
00:52:13,280 --> 00:52:16,320
Speaker 1: they were like, you're not They said, I'm not relatable

1038
00:52:16,320 --> 00:52:19,800
Speaker 1: anymore because my my feelings that day were not like

1039
00:52:20,040 --> 00:52:22,160
Speaker 1: my I had, Like you know, it's like what do

1040
00:52:22,239 --> 00:52:26,320
Speaker 1: they call it, um champagne problems, like you know, complaining.

1041
00:52:26,360 --> 00:52:29,799
Speaker 1: And I go, listen, I wish my do you want

1042
00:52:29,840 --> 00:52:32,279
Speaker 1: me to lie and say that my feelings are something

1043
00:52:32,400 --> 00:52:37,240
Speaker 1: different than they are like these you know this relatable

1044
00:52:37,280 --> 00:52:41,080
Speaker 1: but it's real the heat that Tailor got for the

1045
00:52:41,600 --> 00:52:46,600
Speaker 1: like in the video she went on the scale, yes, yes, okay.

1046
00:52:46,680 --> 00:52:49,560
Speaker 1: So in her anti Hero video, I meant to address

1047
00:52:49,600 --> 00:52:51,560
Speaker 1: this yesterday. I think you know, it reminded me. In

1048
00:52:51,640 --> 00:52:53,920
Speaker 1: the Anti Year video, there's this part of the song

1049
00:52:54,000 --> 00:52:56,880
Speaker 1: It's All about self loathing that that music video and

1050
00:52:57,080 --> 00:53:00,520
Speaker 1: the song itself as a part where she's in the

1051
00:53:00,600 --> 00:53:02,919
Speaker 1: bathroom and she gets on a scale and she looks

1052
00:53:02,960 --> 00:53:04,880
Speaker 1: down in between her feet on the scale it just

1053
00:53:05,000 --> 00:53:07,399
Speaker 1: as fat instead of a number, and then she looks

1054
00:53:07,440 --> 00:53:09,279
Speaker 1: back up at the mirror, and behind her is her

1055
00:53:09,320 --> 00:53:12,479
Speaker 1: evil self staring at her, being like disappointed, like you're fat,

1056
00:53:13,200 --> 00:53:16,719
Speaker 1: and people are freaking out because she's obviously through that

1057
00:53:17,000 --> 00:53:20,160
Speaker 1: connotating fat with bad. You know her, her evil self

1058
00:53:20,239 --> 00:53:22,400
Speaker 1: is disappointed in her for being fat, and Taylor is

1059
00:53:22,440 --> 00:53:24,200
Speaker 1: obviously not fat. So there's a lot of things that

1060
00:53:24,280 --> 00:53:26,879
Speaker 1: play here. When I first saw that, I was like, yo,

1061
00:53:28,040 --> 00:53:31,000
Speaker 1: not the best word to use. She could have written

1062
00:53:31,040 --> 00:53:33,279
Speaker 1: the word bad, because there would be no indication that

1063
00:53:33,360 --> 00:53:35,960
Speaker 1: she's fat on the scale when you equit, when you

1064
00:53:36,000 --> 00:53:40,320
Speaker 1: equate fat with bad, which you know, Taylor is not

1065
00:53:40,400 --> 00:53:42,200
Speaker 1: the first person to do that, by the way, So

1066
00:53:42,360 --> 00:53:45,279
Speaker 1: everyone that's getting mad at her about this, do you

1067
00:53:45,400 --> 00:53:50,600
Speaker 1: think Taylor started the global narrative aside from a couple

1068
00:53:50,960 --> 00:53:54,160
Speaker 1: little communities in Africa where fat women are like the

1069
00:53:55,520 --> 00:54:01,400
Speaker 1: you know that's the the yeah, the idea ild body size, Like,

1070
00:54:02,040 --> 00:54:04,000
Speaker 1: do you think Taylor is the only one that equates

1071
00:54:04,040 --> 00:54:07,360
Speaker 1: fat with bad? She is just highlighting something that society

1072
00:54:07,520 --> 00:54:09,440
Speaker 1: is already telling us. And I get it that she

1073
00:54:09,640 --> 00:54:13,239
Speaker 1: is putting that loud out there loudly and maybe not

1074
00:54:13,400 --> 00:54:18,239
Speaker 1: helping the fat um positivity movement, which I absolutely feel

1075
00:54:18,280 --> 00:54:20,000
Speaker 1: like people should be allowed to be fat and not

1076
00:54:20,160 --> 00:54:24,120
Speaker 1: have it be um more something morally wrong with them

1077
00:54:24,320 --> 00:54:28,719
Speaker 1: or like anything shameful. Like I think fat shouldn't even

1078
00:54:28,719 --> 00:54:30,719
Speaker 1: be a bad word. You're fat and that's fine, Like

1079
00:54:31,000 --> 00:54:33,360
Speaker 1: you're I feel the same way about like any of

1080
00:54:33,440 --> 00:54:35,760
Speaker 1: these words that we think are some kind of moral judgment,

1081
00:54:35,880 --> 00:54:39,240
Speaker 1: like if you're not fuckable, people are like I'm not fuckable,

1082
00:54:39,280 --> 00:54:41,560
Speaker 1: Like oh my god, Like it's so mean. It's like

1083
00:54:42,320 --> 00:54:45,320
Speaker 1: you're allowed to be things. That doesn't mean you're a

1084
00:54:45,360 --> 00:54:48,080
Speaker 1: bad person that you know, But I I take those

1085
00:54:48,120 --> 00:54:50,120
Speaker 1: words too. I struggle with the word fat. I struggle

1086
00:54:50,200 --> 00:54:54,040
Speaker 1: with feeling and associating that with like you're somehow less

1087
00:54:54,080 --> 00:54:56,600
Speaker 1: than I'm not the first person to say that. People

1088
00:54:56,600 --> 00:54:58,359
Speaker 1: have come at me about it before. Nikki, you're still

1089
00:54:58,360 --> 00:55:00,839
Speaker 1: talking about how you feel fat, and you're you're kind

1090
00:55:00,880 --> 00:55:03,640
Speaker 1: of implying that that's a bad thing. Are you kidding me?

1091
00:55:04,120 --> 00:55:07,400
Speaker 1: Look around us? Do you think the society is am

1092
00:55:07,719 --> 00:55:11,120
Speaker 1: I the first person to say that this? Our society

1093
00:55:11,160 --> 00:55:13,080
Speaker 1: does not treat fat people the same way? And I

1094
00:55:13,160 --> 00:55:15,640
Speaker 1: know it's not helping the narrative of treating fat people better.

1095
00:55:16,040 --> 00:55:20,359
Speaker 1: But again, I think pretending like, Oh, everyone loves fat people.

1096
00:55:20,440 --> 00:55:23,719
Speaker 1: Now everyone's accepting of it. Is not the move, not

1097
00:55:23,960 --> 00:55:26,520
Speaker 1: acting blind to the fact that, no, we're still getting

1098
00:55:26,640 --> 00:55:32,120
Speaker 1: inundated with diet culture and being thin. The Kardashians are

1099
00:55:32,160 --> 00:55:34,120
Speaker 1: now sucking all the fat that they put into their

1100
00:55:34,200 --> 00:55:38,040
Speaker 1: bodies out because thin is in again. So Taylor or me,

1101
00:55:38,400 --> 00:55:42,320
Speaker 1: or whoever you're coming after about who are struggling with

1102
00:55:42,520 --> 00:55:45,279
Speaker 1: this feeling of being scared of being fat or being

1103
00:55:45,360 --> 00:55:48,600
Speaker 1: fat and feeling like that makes them less. I'm sorry

1104
00:55:48,719 --> 00:55:50,879
Speaker 1: that if you're a fat person and you feel like, wow,

1105
00:55:51,040 --> 00:55:54,839
Speaker 1: you're connotating fat with bad. We can't help that. That's

1106
00:55:54,880 --> 00:55:56,880
Speaker 1: how we feel. That's what society has given us. And

1107
00:55:56,920 --> 00:55:59,520
Speaker 1: when you make art like Taylor is making, maybe she

1108
00:55:59,600 --> 00:56:01,560
Speaker 1: made a I knew it was going to be a misstep.

1109
00:56:01,560 --> 00:56:03,200
Speaker 1: I knew people are going to come after her. But

1110
00:56:03,320 --> 00:56:06,680
Speaker 1: she's just highlighting what society is telling her. She's not

1111
00:56:06,920 --> 00:56:10,080
Speaker 1: saying fat is bad. She's saying that is what how

1112
00:56:10,200 --> 00:56:13,320
Speaker 1: her brain has been warped. So in doing that, she

1113
00:56:14,120 --> 00:56:16,439
Speaker 1: I bet you anything, that's what she would say. I'm

1114
00:56:16,480 --> 00:56:19,000
Speaker 1: not saying fat is bad. I wish I wish that

1115
00:56:19,080 --> 00:56:21,600
Speaker 1: weren't the case, but I feel like, that's what society

1116
00:56:21,680 --> 00:56:24,279
Speaker 1: is telling me, and that's what my inner demon on

1117
00:56:24,400 --> 00:56:26,560
Speaker 1: my shoulder is telling me. Does that make sense the

1118
00:56:26,640 --> 00:56:29,759
Speaker 1: distinction between those two. But I also see why fat

1119
00:56:29,840 --> 00:56:33,279
Speaker 1: people are very upset by that because if let's say

1120
00:56:33,400 --> 00:56:40,080
Speaker 1: Taylor wrote, um, I don't know, like like something I'm struggling,

1121
00:56:40,200 --> 00:56:43,640
Speaker 1: like like saggy jowls, and was just like, Oh, that's

1122
00:56:43,680 --> 00:56:47,120
Speaker 1: the grossest thing ever. Like whenever my friends are insecure

1123
00:56:47,160 --> 00:56:49,760
Speaker 1: about something that I have, I take it so personally

1124
00:56:49,800 --> 00:56:52,120
Speaker 1: because I'm like, you're saying that this thing that I

1125
00:56:52,280 --> 00:56:56,719
Speaker 1: have is bad, and it's like, yes, because we're you

1126
00:56:56,880 --> 00:56:58,960
Speaker 1: think it's bad about yourself. The only reason you're getting

1127
00:56:59,040 --> 00:57:01,839
Speaker 1: upset about feeling like it's bad because you you hear

1128
00:57:01,880 --> 00:57:04,440
Speaker 1: from society that it's bad, Nikki, Like you already got

1129
00:57:04,520 --> 00:57:07,200
Speaker 1: that message. They're just highlighting it and you're putting all

1130
00:57:07,280 --> 00:57:10,400
Speaker 1: your anger at them, when really the problem is is

1131
00:57:10,480 --> 00:57:13,120
Speaker 1: talking about these things and saying, how ridiculous is it

1132
00:57:13,239 --> 00:57:16,000
Speaker 1: that we think that being fat is bad? What because

1133
00:57:16,040 --> 00:57:18,440
Speaker 1: someone eats more food than someone else, When someone might

1134
00:57:18,480 --> 00:57:20,880
Speaker 1: struggle with a food addiction, someone might not be able

1135
00:57:20,880 --> 00:57:23,000
Speaker 1: to exercise as much, someone might have a thyroid condition,

1136
00:57:23,240 --> 00:57:26,400
Speaker 1: Why do we associate that with laziness, with their bad

1137
00:57:26,760 --> 00:57:30,200
Speaker 1: with they are unlovable? That is the issue. Why do

1138
00:57:30,360 --> 00:57:33,000
Speaker 1: we associate it with don't deny that? That's what we

1139
00:57:33,080 --> 00:57:36,080
Speaker 1: do as a society when artists are asked to censor

1140
00:57:36,160 --> 00:57:39,400
Speaker 1: themselves and not say they're true feelings, even if their

1141
00:57:39,480 --> 00:57:42,160
Speaker 1: feelings spit in the face of everything you want to

1142
00:57:42,240 --> 00:57:45,480
Speaker 1: believe about yourself. And Taylor Swiff doesn't want fat to

1143
00:57:45,600 --> 00:57:49,080
Speaker 1: equal bad, but that's what But that's what it still does.

1144
00:57:52,240 --> 00:57:54,000
Speaker 1: And we are not going to get past it, and

1145
00:57:54,080 --> 00:57:56,520
Speaker 1: we're not. I don't think we'll move past towards a

1146
00:57:56,680 --> 00:57:59,640
Speaker 1: fat um, a non fat phobic society. I don't think

1147
00:57:59,680 --> 00:58:01,600
Speaker 1: we'll get there unless we call out the fact that

1148
00:58:01,680 --> 00:58:04,720
Speaker 1: it is still rampant and that is not solved because

1149
00:58:04,760 --> 00:58:08,160
Speaker 1: of Dove body commercials. Lizzo didn't solve it, Adele didn't

1150
00:58:08,160 --> 00:58:11,320
Speaker 1: solve it. Uh, you know, Ashley Graham didn't solve it.

1151
00:58:11,920 --> 00:58:14,360
Speaker 1: There's we need so much more than that. And I

1152
00:58:14,480 --> 00:58:17,160
Speaker 1: think just acting like everything's fine now and fat is

1153
00:58:17,200 --> 00:58:20,280
Speaker 1: beautiful and everyone thinks so. I think so the American

1154
00:58:20,360 --> 00:58:23,560
Speaker 1: things so like it's okay. If you still struggle with

1155
00:58:23,720 --> 00:58:26,360
Speaker 1: connecting those two your whole life, you've been inundated with

1156
00:58:26,480 --> 00:58:29,200
Speaker 1: fat equals wrong, and it's we all know that not

1157
00:58:29,320 --> 00:58:32,440
Speaker 1: to be true deep in our core. But acting like

1158
00:58:32,960 --> 00:58:35,680
Speaker 1: everything's fine now is not the way to address things.

1159
00:58:36,320 --> 00:58:38,720
Speaker 1: It's just not. And I think that that's what cancel

1160
00:58:38,760 --> 00:58:43,880
Speaker 1: culture is. It's like, just you know, don't talk about rape.

1161
00:58:43,960 --> 00:58:46,200
Speaker 1: You can't make jokes about rape, you can't talk about rape,

1162
00:58:46,240 --> 00:58:48,560
Speaker 1: you can't do it like just pretend it doesn't happen.

1163
00:58:48,600 --> 00:58:51,120
Speaker 1: It will go away, because any mention of it is

1164
00:58:51,680 --> 00:58:53,880
Speaker 1: making someone who's been raped the butt of the joke.

1165
00:58:54,000 --> 00:58:57,080
Speaker 1: Is It's like, no, it's not. I'm commenting on something

1166
00:58:57,160 --> 00:59:00,800
Speaker 1: that is currently plaguing our nation and play my thoughts.

1167
00:59:00,840 --> 00:59:03,200
Speaker 1: And I don't think I don't like rape, but I've

1168
00:59:03,240 --> 00:59:06,240
Speaker 1: got to talk about it. And just because I haven't

1169
00:59:06,280 --> 00:59:08,920
Speaker 1: been raped doesn't give me, you know, doesn't mean I

1170
00:59:09,000 --> 00:59:11,720
Speaker 1: can't talk about it. I think that people just people

1171
00:59:11,760 --> 00:59:14,920
Speaker 1: are so sad, and people are feel so victimized, and

1172
00:59:15,280 --> 00:59:18,520
Speaker 1: they should because it sucks out there, and that they

1173
00:59:18,640 --> 00:59:21,640
Speaker 1: want they want everyone to shake everyone and just be

1174
00:59:21,760 --> 00:59:24,480
Speaker 1: like fat is okay, I'm okay, right, Taylor Swift thinks

1175
00:59:24,520 --> 00:59:27,120
Speaker 1: I'm okay. She does think you're okay. What she doesn't

1176
00:59:27,160 --> 00:59:29,600
Speaker 1: think is okay is these thoughts that tell her that

1177
00:59:29,680 --> 00:59:31,959
Speaker 1: fat is not okay. That's what she doesn't think is okay,

1178
00:59:32,040 --> 00:59:35,120
Speaker 1: and that is what she's calling out. Final answer, Okay,

1179
00:59:35,160 --> 00:59:38,560
Speaker 1: now I have to go. Well, say, dude, we have

1180
00:59:38,640 --> 00:59:40,920
Speaker 1: one more episode tomorrow. Thank you for letting me have

1181
00:59:41,000 --> 00:59:44,680
Speaker 1: that little tirade. Um. I appreciate you all, uh meaning

1182
00:59:45,040 --> 00:59:47,440
Speaker 1: Noah and Andrew and all the listeners. And if you

1183
00:59:47,480 --> 00:59:49,560
Speaker 1: disagree with me and have something else to say on

1184
00:59:49,600 --> 00:59:51,440
Speaker 1: the matter, maybe I'm getting it wrong, maybe there's a

1185
00:59:51,480 --> 00:59:54,000
Speaker 1: blind spot for me. Please let me know. I would

1186
00:59:54,040 --> 00:59:55,800
Speaker 1: love to hear it, because I don't think I have

1187
00:59:55,840 --> 00:59:57,560
Speaker 1: it all figured out, even though the tone boy voice

1188
00:59:57,600 --> 01:00:02,320
Speaker 1: definitely suggested that I did. H All right, guys, thank

1189
01:00:02,320 --> 01:00:10,160
Speaker 1: you so much for listening. Don't be cool and Williams. Okay,

1190
01:00:10,360 --> 01:00:14,960
Speaker 1: who's that Jack? Yeah, he's a basketball player, played high

1191
01:00:14,960 --> 01:00:18,680
Speaker 1: school ball with Moss. Yeah, I'll tell you about it later.

1192
01:00:18,720 --> 01:00:21,120
Speaker 1: Another person I don't know. Yeah, he's a bit football

1193
01:00:21,160 --> 01:00:24,880
Speaker 1: player who played basketball. Take goodbye. I'll let you know