WEBVTT - Extreme Tourism: A Simpsons Writer Goes Where You Wouldn’t 0:00:00.120 --> 0:00:03.960 I thought I'm gonna die here, And the thought I 0:00:04.000 --> 0:00:05.920 couldn't get out of my head was I'm going to 0:00:06.000 --> 0:00:10.920 die here. I'll never get to see Avatar too. 0:00:11.440 --> 0:00:14.400 You are a strange person, you know. 0:00:15.400 --> 0:00:17.840 Wow, I just couldn't get that out of my head. 0:00:21.280 --> 0:00:28.600 Now, really, really, really hello, and welcome to really know 0:00:28.720 --> 0:00:31.760 really with Jason, Alexander and Peter Tilden, who want you 0:00:31.880 --> 0:00:34.800 to know that there is no danger in subscribing to 0:00:34.880 --> 0:00:38.840 our show. But today's episode is about the incredible rise 0:00:38.920 --> 0:00:43.360 in extreme travel, or as it's often called, danger tourism, 0:00:43.880 --> 0:00:47.480 diving down to crushing depths to view the Titanic, sight 0:00:47.600 --> 0:00:52.320 seeing in a hostile dictatorships, shopping sprees, and active war zones. 0:00:52.400 --> 0:00:57.600 People are actually going to these treacherous places for vacation. Really, no, really, 0:00:58.040 --> 0:01:02.040 People like mild mannered super traveler Mike Reese, the Emmy 0:01:02.040 --> 0:01:05.720 Award winning writer producer of The Simpsons who, compelled by 0:01:05.720 --> 0:01:08.959 his wife, has visited one hundred and thirty six countries, 0:01:09.240 --> 0:01:13.720 including Iran, Syria, and North Korea. And considering that Jason 0:01:13.760 --> 0:01:16.200 and Peter think that single ply toilet paper in the 0:01:16.280 --> 0:01:19.200 bathroom is extreme tourism, this should be interesting. 0:01:19.400 --> 0:01:20.400 Here's Jason and Peter. 0:01:21.640 --> 0:01:24.840 Well, Peter this episode, this episode, we're living on the edge. 0:01:24.880 --> 0:01:27.880 We're out there. We're hanging it out there, baby, hanging 0:01:27.920 --> 0:01:28.400 it out there. 0:01:28.480 --> 0:01:31.640 I can't I don't understand. I know what the genetics 0:01:31.640 --> 0:01:33.600 are here, what the personality type, I don't. 0:01:33.480 --> 0:01:35.839 Understand it all. So let's tell everybody what we're talking about. 0:01:35.840 --> 0:01:38.760 So there is a phenomena that we've come across. Some 0:01:38.800 --> 0:01:41.960 people call it adventure tourism. I think that's under selling 0:01:42.040 --> 0:01:45.800 and it's really extreme tourism. And this is things like 0:01:46.240 --> 0:01:48.680 you know, going on the Titan Submerciful, or you go 0:01:48.760 --> 0:01:50.480 to the most dangerous places in the world. 0:01:50.480 --> 0:01:54.600 They have to try the story right exactly. I'll just 0:01:54.640 --> 0:01:55.680 give you a stupid example. 0:01:55.720 --> 0:01:59.200 There was a guy, Miles Rutledge from Britain, right, and 0:01:59.240 --> 0:02:03.120 he decided the holiday in Afghanistan. As the country fell 0:02:03.160 --> 0:02:06.240 to the Taliban. He was of course subducted. He was 0:02:06.440 --> 0:02:07.120 later freed. 0:02:07.600 --> 0:02:07.720 Uh. 0:02:07.880 --> 0:02:11.240 He became a YouTube sensation since then. He uh he 0:02:11.320 --> 0:02:13.480 went back to Afghanistan where he was taking prisoner by 0:02:13.560 --> 0:02:14.040 the Taliban. 0:02:14.160 --> 0:02:16.120 The second top. Oh my gosh. 0:02:16.320 --> 0:02:18.840 So people are just they're they're going to the craziest 0:02:18.840 --> 0:02:20.840 places and we wanted to talk more about this, so 0:02:20.880 --> 0:02:23.760 we I gotta tell you we got the face, the 0:02:23.840 --> 0:02:25.359 face of extreme tourism. 0:02:25.400 --> 0:02:26.600 This is the guy you. 0:02:26.560 --> 0:02:28.760 Go to the source you get, you get, you get 0:02:28.760 --> 0:02:31.080 the well spring. If you know the name Mike Raeese 0:02:31.080 --> 0:02:33.160 as well as I do, you probably know him as 0:02:33.200 --> 0:02:36.840 the four time Emmy award winning and screw him and 0:02:36.919 --> 0:02:39.880 Pea by the award winning a head writer for The Simpsons, 0:02:40.400 --> 0:02:42.720 but he's done many other things. He's a contributing writer 0:02:42.880 --> 0:02:46.919 to two dozen animated films, including favors like all four 0:02:46.960 --> 0:02:49.400 of the Ice Ages, the Two Despicable Mes, The Lorex, 0:02:49.440 --> 0:02:52.760 Kung Fu Panda, the Simpsons movie of course. 0:02:53.240 --> 0:02:53.680 Uh. 0:02:54.040 --> 0:02:57.320 He's a former president of the Harvard Lampoon. My son 0:02:57.360 --> 0:02:59.760 went to Yale, so I don't I'm Harvard. 0:02:59.800 --> 0:03:01.360 I'm in Harvard. They on my own campus. 0:03:01.400 --> 0:03:04.960 But yeah, I understand nineteen children's books, including the best 0:03:04.960 --> 0:03:08.280 selling How Murray Saved Christmas, which became an award winning 0:03:08.560 --> 0:03:13.120 animated film starring starring someone you know who. There you go, 0:03:13.200 --> 0:03:15.120 and he's got a fantastic podcast. 0:03:15.160 --> 0:03:16.760 What am I doing here? Have you heard the podcast? 0:03:16.800 --> 0:03:19.960 And I I've heard I got doing it? Ladies and gentlemen, 0:03:20.160 --> 0:03:21.480 Mike Rays, how are you, sir? 0:03:22.000 --> 0:03:25.160 What a pleasure, what a plug? That's so beautiful. You 0:03:25.320 --> 0:03:28.320 saved me the trouble of shaming myself. 0:03:28.400 --> 0:03:31.359 Right, you don't have to shamelessly promote anymore. 0:03:31.440 --> 0:03:35.120 And the first thing, and we'll start back in your childhood, 0:03:35.760 --> 0:03:37.240 because it didn't look like you were going to be 0:03:37.240 --> 0:03:39.480 an adventure or extreme tourist, because I think I read 0:03:39.480 --> 0:03:42.360 that you said it was something big travel and leaving 0:03:42.400 --> 0:03:45.440 the house with something to be dreaded in your family. 0:03:45.040 --> 0:03:47.640 That's it. Yeah, I come from a big family. There 0:03:47.680 --> 0:03:51.600 are five kids, and uh we'd all pile in the 0:03:51.640 --> 0:03:55.520 car and my dad would drive us the Civil War site. 0:03:56.520 --> 0:03:58.600 With the actors. Did they have the re enactors? 0:03:59.280 --> 0:03:59.680 No? 0:03:59.680 --> 0:04:01.560 No, oh, just a field. 0:04:01.760 --> 0:04:05.360 We drive to Pennful, Vania. Here's a field and you know, 0:04:05.440 --> 0:04:08.040 and he wouldn't even tell us what happened, which is there? 0:04:08.080 --> 0:04:11.600 Why are we in the field here? And uh in Virginia, 0:04:11.720 --> 0:04:15.960 here's another field And I just hated it. And uh 0:04:16.080 --> 0:04:19.120 so that was a vacation with something I really hated. 0:04:19.240 --> 0:04:21.200 And it was it was an hour kick with all 0:04:21.240 --> 0:04:25.520 these kids in the car, the dad who was always mad. 0:04:26.839 --> 0:04:28.520 So so let's take a leap. 0:04:28.560 --> 0:04:31.160 You meet this woman, you fall in love, and did 0:04:31.160 --> 0:04:33.839 you have any sense that this was somebody who for 0:04:33.880 --> 0:04:35.800 the next thirty plus years is going to drag you 0:04:35.839 --> 0:04:37.760 to hell holes all over the world where you risk 0:04:37.839 --> 0:04:39.839 your life and you would glad well, not gladly, but 0:04:39.880 --> 0:04:40.880 you would go and say yes. 0:04:41.839 --> 0:04:44.400 The answer is no, I have no idea. If we 0:04:45.000 --> 0:04:48.400 dated for two years and never left her apartment, we 0:04:48.560 --> 0:04:52.200 just go to her apartment and watch TV all weekend. 0:04:52.360 --> 0:04:55.039 Oh my gosh, and I thought I have found my 0:04:55.200 --> 0:04:59.200 dream girl. And it was it was just such a 0:04:59.240 --> 0:05:03.800 classic day and switch. And then we're getting married and 0:05:03.839 --> 0:05:06.000 we're trying to figure out where to take a honeymoon 0:05:06.160 --> 0:05:10.839 and I suggest that Disneyland or Disney World, and she 0:05:11.080 --> 0:05:15.000 said I was thinking of Yemen or Siberia, and I 0:05:15.080 --> 0:05:17.760 said those are places people want to get out of, 0:05:18.000 --> 0:05:20.479 right right, And that that was it she did. She 0:05:20.560 --> 0:05:23.520 waited right to the honeymoon to lower the boom on 0:05:23.640 --> 0:05:26.080 me that we weren't going to be sitting around the 0:05:26.120 --> 0:05:27.000 house anymore. 0:05:28.360 --> 0:05:31.040 At that point, you've been to how many countries. 0:05:30.720 --> 0:05:32.880 Now, one hundred and thirty six. 0:05:32.880 --> 0:05:34.880 How many of them are They do not go to 0:05:35.040 --> 0:05:35.719 lists currently. 0:05:36.480 --> 0:05:39.040 Uh gee, I don't know. It changes a lot day 0:05:39.040 --> 0:05:40.840 to day, A lot of them. I mean I've been 0:05:41.279 --> 0:05:45.479 I've been to every Muslim country, so I know a 0:05:45.480 --> 0:05:46.719 lot of those are. 0:05:46.680 --> 0:05:49.440 And it says are are e. I s s an 0:05:49.440 --> 0:05:51.800 your passport it's sure, you know you. 0:05:51.800 --> 0:05:56.120 Don't even need them the name yet my passport photo 0:05:56.240 --> 0:06:01.159 looks like uh, looks like anti Semitic propaganda. I look 0:06:01.320 --> 0:06:03.080 like the face on hate that. 0:06:09.880 --> 0:06:11.960 So before we get into every place that she's dragged you, 0:06:12.520 --> 0:06:13.720 what does she have on you? 0:06:14.160 --> 0:06:14.320 Is it? 0:06:14.400 --> 0:06:18.080 I know it's it's it's the source of slightly rewarding sex. 0:06:18.080 --> 0:06:21.520 But other than that, what does she have on you 0:06:21.600 --> 0:06:23.240 that you why. 0:06:23.680 --> 0:06:26.480 When she proposes going to a place that you know 0:06:27.400 --> 0:06:28.520 is going to be difficult? 0:06:28.720 --> 0:06:30.919 Why do you say yes? Is it just love? 0:06:32.240 --> 0:06:32.560 It is? 0:06:32.680 --> 0:06:37.080 Well, yes, it is love and just sort of general 0:06:37.360 --> 0:06:41.039 married to civity. I think you know, I made a 0:06:41.080 --> 0:06:45.600 list once of everything that husbands do for their wives, 0:06:46.000 --> 0:06:48.240 and I don't think the wives understand that at all. 0:06:48.320 --> 0:06:50.720 They think the husbands are going men would never buy 0:06:50.760 --> 0:06:54.719 a house starting with that, no house would ever be sold. 0:06:55.080 --> 0:06:58.240 If a wife didn't make a husband would wear pants, 0:06:58.800 --> 0:07:03.039 they'd never go I know it's your special love, Jason. 0:07:03.080 --> 0:07:06.320 But no man would ever go to a Broadway musical. 0:07:06.760 --> 0:07:10.280 You walk, you walk into a Broadway theater. There's four 0:07:10.400 --> 0:07:14.040 hundred men there who don't want to be there, and 0:07:14.040 --> 0:07:15.920 they're want to just think I wasn't that nice? 0:07:16.400 --> 0:07:19.040 Oh my go. So your wife not only possesses the 0:07:19.160 --> 0:07:23.080 danger Jeen, she possesses the persuasion gene because she's gotta 0:07:23.160 --> 0:07:26.080 because she's gotten you to go to Let's let's just 0:07:26.160 --> 0:07:30.280 give us hot panduras. You were duck. 0:07:30.480 --> 0:07:33.280 We got kidnapped in it's it's one hundred and thirty 0:07:33.280 --> 0:07:36.200 six countries and the big ones are you know, I 0:07:36.400 --> 0:07:39.760 ran and Iraq and Liby. But it's all worked out 0:07:40.720 --> 0:07:42.360 a story. I hope I get to tell us about 0:07:42.360 --> 0:07:45.400 going to North Korea. We went to North Korea, Dalla. 0:07:47.240 --> 0:07:50.440 It was one morning. I woke up and there was 0:07:50.480 --> 0:07:53.040 an email from Harvard Travel saying do you want to 0:07:53.080 --> 0:07:55.720 go to North Korea? And I said, no, I do not, 0:07:56.000 --> 0:07:58.840 And I deleted the email and then went through the 0:07:59.080 --> 0:08:02.680 trash and delee did it again before my wife woke up. 0:08:03.080 --> 0:08:05.240 But of course she went to Harvard too, and they 0:08:05.280 --> 0:08:07.560 sent her the same email and she, of course we 0:08:07.600 --> 0:08:10.520 want to go to We want to go to North Korea. 0:08:11.360 --> 0:08:14.800 And the big scar on top of what scares everyone 0:08:14.840 --> 0:08:20.720 about North Korea is the idea that they kidnapped visiting filmmakers. 0:08:22.160 --> 0:08:25.080 Kim Jong Ill, when he was in charge back then, 0:08:26.400 --> 0:08:28.800 was an expert on film. He had a collection of 0:08:28.840 --> 0:08:33.000 forty thousand DVDs, and so he would throw these film 0:08:33.080 --> 0:08:36.880 festivals in North Korea and if an actor, if a director, 0:08:36.920 --> 0:08:40.040 if a writer showed up that he liked, he would 0:08:40.120 --> 0:08:43.400 kidnap him and force him to make movies for the 0:08:43.440 --> 0:08:48.640 regime for twenty years. So this was real danger for 0:08:48.720 --> 0:08:53.680 me to go to North Korea. And I got advice 0:08:53.760 --> 0:08:57.320 on what to put on the application. I was supposed 0:08:57.360 --> 0:09:01.199 to say I was a publicist, not a rite. And 0:09:01.320 --> 0:09:04.240 we get to North Korea and they greet me and 0:09:04.280 --> 0:09:07.800 they say, mister Reese, we know who you are, and 0:09:07.880 --> 0:09:13.560 you have nothing to worry about. I realized, we've read 0:09:16.520 --> 0:09:17.800 we don't need this guy. 0:09:18.240 --> 0:09:22.079 By the way, just in case, did you think if 0:09:22.120 --> 0:09:24.320 I get abducted, there are two things I would love 0:09:24.360 --> 0:09:24.959 to get made. 0:09:25.880 --> 0:09:32.120 Yeah, you know there's a guy. There's a guy who 0:09:32.280 --> 0:09:35.720 was kidnapped by the regime. He was a Japanese filmmaker, 0:09:36.880 --> 0:09:39.559 and first they put him in a concentration camp for 0:09:39.600 --> 0:09:41.920 five years, and then they let him out and let 0:09:42.000 --> 0:09:45.800 him make whatever he wanted. And if you're a fan 0:09:45.880 --> 0:09:49.400 of these things, there's a movie called Plasari, which you 0:09:49.440 --> 0:09:53.360 can see in its entirety on YouTube, and it's North 0:09:53.400 --> 0:09:57.720 Korea's Godzilla movie and it's free. He got to make 0:09:57.880 --> 0:10:02.360 this terrific Godzilla movie. And then he finally escaped North 0:10:02.440 --> 0:10:06.040 Korea and he went to Hollywood, and you know, suddenly 0:10:06.120 --> 0:10:09.160 he's in Hollywood as a sixty year old director, and 0:10:09.200 --> 0:10:11.960 I'm sure it's going, Gee, we're a little better and. 0:10:12.760 --> 0:10:17.480 Yeah, yeah, I'm guessing he never got notes. He didn't 0:10:17.480 --> 0:10:21.480 get profit profit participation either, so that that already would 0:10:21.480 --> 0:10:23.800 put me off. But let's talk about the submersible, because 0:10:23.960 --> 0:10:26.800 I think I reached out to you when that happened, 0:10:26.800 --> 0:10:30.200 as did almost every news organization in America, because they 0:10:30.240 --> 0:10:32.760 found out you were kind of a notable guy having 0:10:32.800 --> 0:10:37.320 gone in the submersible, not once, not twice, but how 0:10:37.360 --> 0:10:52.200 many times, Mike, having gone in the submersible, not once, 0:10:53.120 --> 0:10:54.800 not twice, but how many times. 0:10:54.559 --> 0:10:58.680 Mike, Well, I have four times, and just just a 0:10:58.679 --> 0:11:02.920 classic this is the exact same company where the disaster happened, 0:11:02.960 --> 0:11:04.120 right where it imploded. 0:11:04.800 --> 0:11:08.840 This is the now I'll clarify it. Everyone gets it wrong. 0:11:09.200 --> 0:11:13.840 I took three dives with this company, with the famous 0:11:13.880 --> 0:11:17.400 Stockton Rush who built the sub and then died in 0:11:17.480 --> 0:11:21.240 the sub. I took three dives off of Satn Island 0:11:21.280 --> 0:11:25.199 with it. So that's three in the four. That's how 0:11:25.200 --> 0:11:28.000 we got involved with him and kind of caught his dream. 0:11:28.160 --> 0:11:30.560 But it was just, you know, we liked it. It 0:11:30.600 --> 0:11:33.880 was local. And we took this dive down to what's 0:11:33.920 --> 0:11:37.520 called Hudson Canyon. There's the canyon under the Hudson River 0:11:38.000 --> 0:11:40.360 that is bigger than the Grand Canyon. 0:11:41.000 --> 0:11:41.320 Wow. 0:11:41.360 --> 0:11:44.600 And we went down. It was beautiful experience. And then 0:11:44.600 --> 0:11:46.520 we came up and it was only when we're getting 0:11:46.520 --> 0:11:49.040 out he goes, you know, you're the first people ever 0:11:49.120 --> 0:11:52.720 to do that, and was like, what, you know, I 0:11:52.800 --> 0:11:54.880 wish I don't want to be the first. I don't 0:11:54.880 --> 0:11:58.840 want to be Neil Armstrong. I want to be Harrison Schmidt. 0:11:58.880 --> 0:12:01.360 I want to be the asked man on the moon 0:12:01.559 --> 0:12:05.320 right after they got all the blugs out. And so 0:12:05.400 --> 0:12:07.880 we took those three dives with him, and then two 0:12:08.000 --> 0:12:10.520 years later he said, well, I built a new sub 0:12:11.240 --> 0:12:14.319 to go to the Titanic, and that's the titan and 0:12:14.400 --> 0:12:18.080 we we rode that with him, and again I didn't 0:12:18.080 --> 0:12:21.120 want to go. I didn't, and this is crazy, this 0:12:21.240 --> 0:12:25.040 is is I didn't. A friend of us are called 0:12:25.040 --> 0:12:27.960 this up. Hey, here's they're taking these dives now to 0:12:28.040 --> 0:12:31.520 the Titanic. And my first words were, well, that sounds 0:12:31.600 --> 0:12:36.160 like a fun way to die. So and so I 0:12:36.280 --> 0:12:41.920 had no illusions going into this. But I would never 0:12:41.960 --> 0:12:44.800 have done it in a million years except it fell 0:12:44.840 --> 0:12:46.719 on my wife's birthday. 0:12:47.200 --> 0:12:47.920 And that was it. 0:12:48.000 --> 0:12:50.719 That's my motivation comes out. I don't want to go. 0:12:50.679 --> 0:12:54.680 To ask you question here because you're a really smart guy. 0:12:55.440 --> 0:12:58.360 You're a brilliant writer. You're obviously well traveled. 0:12:58.840 --> 0:13:01.400 I saw pictures of what that saying looked like inside 0:13:01.480 --> 0:13:04.359 on a good day. It's like somebody saying. 0:13:04.120 --> 0:13:05.800 A good day is when it doesn't fold in on. 0:13:07.600 --> 0:13:07.920 You go. 0:13:08.120 --> 0:13:11.280 You're basically sitting in water in a like a metal 0:13:12.040 --> 0:13:14.800 barrel with a couple other people, with your legs folded, 0:13:15.320 --> 0:13:18.080 and the guy's using a game controller that looks like 0:13:18.120 --> 0:13:20.160 he staw from his son's PlayStation. 0:13:20.880 --> 0:13:24.680 It is definitely literally an Xbox game controller. 0:13:24.880 --> 0:13:25.440 Oh my god. 0:13:25.600 --> 0:13:27.920 So if I looked into that, if I got to 0:13:27.960 --> 0:13:30.080 the point where I put the money down and then 0:13:30.160 --> 0:13:33.400 saw inside that for the first time, weren't you deterred 0:13:33.559 --> 0:13:36.760 by what it looked like? You're going to be sitting 0:13:36.800 --> 0:13:38.000 in to go to the Titanic? 0:13:38.840 --> 0:13:42.560 No? No, no, you know what can I say? I 0:13:42.600 --> 0:13:46.160 have no children, I'm an aging Hollywood rider, I have 0:13:46.320 --> 0:13:51.840 nothing to live for. I had nothing to fear about it. 0:13:51.840 --> 0:13:55.920 There was every I knew completely that I could die 0:13:56.000 --> 0:13:56.280 in that. 0:13:56.760 --> 0:14:01.800 Wow, but there's so many ways you could die in it. 0:14:02.520 --> 0:14:04.680 I mean, I don't want to I don't want to 0:14:04.720 --> 0:14:08.199 speak lightly about a tragedy. But but at least with 0:14:08.240 --> 0:14:11.720 what happened on the titan in this case, was you know, 0:14:11.960 --> 0:14:14.080 an implosion that happened so fast that you have to 0:14:14.160 --> 0:14:17.480 assume hopefully they had no idea that it was just 0:14:17.559 --> 0:14:18.400 no instant death. 0:14:18.720 --> 0:14:23.280 But what about a leak and the leak is faster 0:14:23.360 --> 0:14:24.320 than we can go up? 0:14:24.720 --> 0:14:27.120 You know, there there's all kinds of things that can happen, 0:14:27.200 --> 0:14:30.520 especially if you're talking about fairly untested technology. 0:14:30.560 --> 0:14:31.600 Here, I just. 0:14:32.480 --> 0:14:36.040 True and in fact, having taken the other dives with 0:14:36.120 --> 0:14:39.640 the guy when we first heard the titan was missing. 0:14:41.080 --> 0:14:43.560 I thought, oh, they're trapped at the bottom of the ocean. 0:14:43.840 --> 0:14:47.640 My wife immediately thought it had imploded as soon as 0:14:47.640 --> 0:14:49.960 we heard the news, and they spent you know, four 0:14:50.040 --> 0:14:54.080 days looking for it. She goes, it imploded, and I thought, no, 0:14:55.520 --> 0:14:59.840 it's solow tech. How you that whole sub works. I'll 0:14:59.840 --> 0:15:02.200 tell make it through it real quick because you climb 0:15:02.200 --> 0:15:05.760 in there. Something else I didn't know was they bolt 0:15:05.800 --> 0:15:08.600 you in from the outside. Yeah. I thought there was 0:15:08.640 --> 0:15:14.800 a way out. Wow. Yeah, But they bolt you in 0:15:15.440 --> 0:15:17.320 and they push it in the water and then it 0:15:17.480 --> 0:15:21.480 just drops like a stone. It just drops for two 0:15:21.560 --> 0:15:23.600 and a half hours, two and a half It goes 0:15:23.600 --> 0:15:26.080 two and a half miles down. But that's all there 0:15:26.160 --> 0:15:29.480 is to it. It just drops like a stone. And 0:15:30.960 --> 0:15:34.920 I fell asleep. That's how unscared I was. I fell 0:15:34.960 --> 0:15:38.080 asleep on the way down. It was boring, and I 0:15:38.120 --> 0:15:41.880 woke up when we hit bottom, and it's it's I 0:15:42.040 --> 0:15:45.840 wish this on nobody. The thought that you're sleeping and 0:15:45.880 --> 0:15:48.080 you think you're home in bed, and you wake up 0:15:48.200 --> 0:15:50.800 and go, oh, no, I'm two and a half miles 0:15:51.120 --> 0:15:55.760 under the water. And so we hit bottom, and you know, 0:15:55.840 --> 0:15:59.600 they pull out the Xbox game controller that steers the ship, 0:16:00.200 --> 0:16:02.600 and we knew for some reason, we knew we were 0:16:02.720 --> 0:16:07.560 five hundred yards from the Titanic, but we couldn't see it. 0:16:07.640 --> 0:16:11.000 Here it is the biggest thing man had ever built, 0:16:11.120 --> 0:16:13.640 and we were right by it and couldn't find the thing. 0:16:14.400 --> 0:16:16.920 And we look at the compass and the compass is 0:16:16.960 --> 0:16:21.160 just spinning in circles. That was no help. So we 0:16:21.160 --> 0:16:23.800 were just sort of bumming around the bottom of the 0:16:23.800 --> 0:16:29.680 ocean looking for the Titanic, and everybody's springing into action, 0:16:29.880 --> 0:16:34.120 you know, both the crew and the paying customers, and 0:16:34.200 --> 0:16:38.400 I'm not doing anything. I'm just ballast. I you know, 0:16:38.000 --> 0:16:40.640 I don't even drive. What do you think I can 0:16:40.680 --> 0:16:43.240 help you on this? So I'm just sitting there. And 0:16:43.320 --> 0:16:47.560 so with twenty minutes to go, we found the Titanic, 0:16:47.720 --> 0:16:51.400 and we just had enough time to get all the 0:16:51.480 --> 0:16:56.040 glory shots. Wet I got photos of the anchor and 0:16:56.080 --> 0:16:58.720 the bow of the ship and the side where it 0:16:58.760 --> 0:17:00.960 says Titanic, and then we had to go. 0:17:00.920 --> 0:17:04.320 Back up a release that had death in there quite 0:17:04.320 --> 0:17:06.320 a few times, right that said you could die quite 0:17:06.359 --> 0:17:07.880 a few times, I mean right or from. 0:17:08.400 --> 0:17:11.959 You sign a waiver that mentions death three times on 0:17:12.080 --> 0:17:15.959 page one and you just page through it. And they 0:17:16.200 --> 0:17:19.400 thought of every way you can die on this thing. 0:17:20.160 --> 0:17:24.600 So anybody, you know, again, this is the news developed 0:17:24.600 --> 0:17:29.280 the narrative, which was totally unfair, and you know, like 0:17:29.320 --> 0:17:32.280 people had done what they were getting into. They everyone 0:17:32.440 --> 0:17:35.840 knew exactly what they were getting into. 0:17:35.160 --> 0:17:39.440 M Let me go into some of your other troubles 0:17:39.440 --> 0:17:41.600 just to ask this question. Has there ever been a 0:17:41.640 --> 0:17:45.160 situation in a series where where you go, oh, we're 0:17:45.200 --> 0:17:47.919 we're really in trouble. Then we have a big problem. 0:17:49.000 --> 0:17:50.600 What would that? What was that? 0:17:51.080 --> 0:17:53.280 It was just about a year ago. It was New 0:17:53.359 --> 0:17:56.640 Year's Eve in Namidia, and this is something we didn't 0:17:56.640 --> 0:17:59.960 even think would be dangerous. But my wife said, oh, 0:18:01.080 --> 0:18:03.679 let's hire a car and a driver and watch the 0:18:03.800 --> 0:18:07.840 last sunset of the year from the Namibian desert on 0:18:07.920 --> 0:18:10.800 top of the sand dune. So we go, all right, 0:18:11.000 --> 0:18:14.359 and of course I say yes because that's the only 0:18:14.400 --> 0:18:17.720 word I know. And so we booked this and it's 0:18:17.880 --> 0:18:23.320 very romantic and we're watching the sunset and then my 0:18:23.400 --> 0:18:25.880 wife looks over at the car and she goes, why 0:18:25.920 --> 0:18:30.000 are the lights on? And I said, honey, the man 0:18:30.200 --> 0:18:34.280 knows what he's doing, which, of course you're always famous 0:18:34.359 --> 0:18:38.120 last word. So the sun goes down, we pile back 0:18:38.119 --> 0:18:40.359 in the car. The guy tries to start the car 0:18:40.720 --> 0:18:41.440 and it's dead. 0:18:41.800 --> 0:18:42.359 It's dead. 0:18:42.440 --> 0:18:45.359 He ran the battery down, and we get on our 0:18:45.440 --> 0:18:50.000 cell phones and there's no phone reception from the Namibian desert, 0:18:50.160 --> 0:18:53.560 so we're stuck there, right and the desert when the 0:18:53.600 --> 0:18:57.920 sun goes down, goes from eighty degrees to forty degrees, 0:18:58.560 --> 0:19:01.600 so it's really cold. My wife is in a bathing suit. 0:19:01.880 --> 0:19:05.040 We are not prepared for this. And then this is 0:19:06.320 --> 0:19:11.520 where the car driver did something that wouldn't even go 0:19:11.600 --> 0:19:15.840 in a Wily Wily coyote cartoon. He had such a 0:19:15.920 --> 0:19:19.280 stupid plant where we get out of the car and 0:19:19.320 --> 0:19:22.240 he starts pushing it to the edge of the sand dune. 0:19:22.920 --> 0:19:26.480 And his idea is it'll roll down the sand dune 0:19:26.560 --> 0:19:29.520 and start up, and it's like, yeah, but we're not 0:19:29.720 --> 0:19:33.359 in the car. It's just gonna take off the sand, 0:19:33.520 --> 0:19:36.119 the car will be saved and we're going to freeze 0:19:36.160 --> 0:19:42.240 it out in the desert. But instead, instead he pushed 0:19:42.240 --> 0:19:46.080 it half off the sand dune, so it's teetering over 0:19:46.119 --> 0:19:50.320 the precipice, like if you remember the original Italian. 0:19:49.840 --> 0:19:52.760 Jont just like that. 0:19:51.760 --> 0:19:55.800 That classic ending was now my life where it's teetering there. 0:19:55.880 --> 0:19:58.000 So now we can't even get in the car for 0:19:58.160 --> 0:20:00.960 warm it's too dangerous. So we're just gonna have to 0:20:01.480 --> 0:20:05.239 sit there and freeze the death in the desert. And 0:20:05.280 --> 0:20:07.840 that that's the close point. I thought, I'm going to 0:20:07.960 --> 0:20:11.520 die here. And the thought I couldn't get out of 0:20:11.520 --> 0:20:14.280 my head was I'm going to die here. I'll never 0:20:14.960 --> 0:20:17.560 I'll never get to see Avatar too. 0:20:21.359 --> 0:20:23.120 You're a strange person, you know that? 0:20:23.160 --> 0:20:26.919 And wow that I just couldn't get that out of 0:20:26.920 --> 0:20:31.600 my head. And then like a miracle, the driver's phone rang, 0:20:31.840 --> 0:20:34.200 like we couldn't make calls out, the calls could still 0:20:34.240 --> 0:20:36.560 come in, and it was his boss going where the 0:20:36.640 --> 0:20:39.440 hell is the car? And he told him and he 0:20:39.560 --> 0:20:42.600 rescued us, and we got home right around midnight for 0:20:42.720 --> 0:20:46.520 New Year's Eve, and I went home and saw Avatar too, 0:20:46.520 --> 0:20:49.400 where I go What the what was that? That was terrible? 0:20:49.840 --> 0:20:53.399 Which I died in the desert. So moving moving on 0:20:53.480 --> 0:20:55.920 to a couple of other observations you made. You said 0:20:55.920 --> 0:20:58.720 that the Cuban flag I should have a broken toilet 0:20:58.760 --> 0:21:01.320 on it because there's not one workable toilet in all 0:21:01.359 --> 0:21:02.159 of Tuba. 0:21:02.600 --> 0:21:07.280 There is not one everywhere. When there's no working toilet, 0:21:07.400 --> 0:21:11.040 they're all broken. And one day we were outside of 0:21:11.119 --> 0:21:14.280 a restaurant and we see just sitting in front where 0:21:14.280 --> 0:21:18.520 the customers coming, the brokennest toilet in the world. It's 0:21:18.600 --> 0:21:22.879 just in shards and pieces and scattered all over. And 0:21:23.840 --> 0:21:25.639 she said, maybe they're bringing it in. 0:21:27.840 --> 0:21:28.960 That's the restaurant. 0:21:30.680 --> 0:21:34.520 Do you bring anything to a ensure your health, be 0:21:34.920 --> 0:21:37.320 to nail yourself in, Like, where's papa to the. 0:21:37.320 --> 0:21:39.639 Room so you can get in? You bring nails and wood? 0:21:40.640 --> 0:21:43.120 What precautionary stuff do you take that could be tips 0:21:43.160 --> 0:21:43.800 to our audience? 0:21:44.400 --> 0:21:46.960 You know what, I just have a lot of your 0:21:47.000 --> 0:21:52.640 basic medicines. I don't bring anything special, I gotta say. 0:21:52.680 --> 0:21:56.000 And sometimes I get sick. Maybe once a year I 0:21:56.160 --> 0:21:59.960 get sick. We were in Syria, okay, this I take 0:22:00.160 --> 0:22:03.600 my vacations in Syria and I loved it. I mean, 0:22:03.640 --> 0:22:05.399