1 00:00:00,880 --> 00:00:03,840 Speaker 1: Well, guys, it is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, 2 00:00:03,920 --> 00:00:07,800 Speaker 1: and if you need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, 3 00:00:07,800 --> 00:00:10,959 Speaker 1: and more, please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM 4 00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:15,160 Speaker 1: dot com and click submit Strawberry letta because we could 5 00:00:15,160 --> 00:00:18,040 Speaker 1: be reading your letter live on the air, just like 6 00:00:18,040 --> 00:00:20,239 Speaker 1: we're going to read this one right here, right now, 7 00:00:20,239 --> 00:00:24,360 Speaker 1: and who knows it could be yours. You just never know, Yeah, 8 00:00:24,400 --> 00:00:27,479 Speaker 1: you just never know. Buckle up and hold on tight. 9 00:00:27,560 --> 00:00:31,120 Speaker 1: Be guided for you. Here it is the Strawberry Letter. 10 00:00:32,640 --> 00:00:35,720 Speaker 1: Thank you, that's you all right, Here we go. Subject. 11 00:00:36,080 --> 00:00:39,919 Speaker 1: I'm selfish and tired of sharing. Dear Stephen Shirley. I'm 12 00:00:39,920 --> 00:00:42,120 Speaker 1: a thirty two year old man and my girlfriend is 13 00:00:42,159 --> 00:00:45,199 Speaker 1: thirty years old. We've been together almost four years, and 14 00:00:45,280 --> 00:00:48,239 Speaker 1: at the start of our relationship things were great. I 15 00:00:48,360 --> 00:00:51,120 Speaker 1: proposed last year, but she told me she needed her 16 00:00:51,159 --> 00:00:54,360 Speaker 1: mom's blessing before we got married. I thought her mom 17 00:00:54,400 --> 00:00:56,840 Speaker 1: and I had a good connection, but she won't give 18 00:00:56,840 --> 00:00:59,360 Speaker 1: me her blessing until she gets to know me better. 19 00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:03,120 Speaker 1: My life has turned upside down since I proposed. Right 20 00:01:03,240 --> 00:01:06,039 Speaker 1: after I ask my girl to marry me, we found 21 00:01:06,040 --> 00:01:10,040 Speaker 1: out that she's pregnant. Again. She ran to her mom first, 22 00:01:10,280 --> 00:01:13,240 Speaker 1: and then they came over to tell me about the baby. 23 00:01:13,560 --> 00:01:16,880 Speaker 1: Her mom became even more controlling, and she insisted that 24 00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:20,600 Speaker 1: my girlfriend move in with her until after she has 25 00:01:20,640 --> 00:01:24,200 Speaker 1: the baby. That limits our time together because her mom 26 00:01:24,240 --> 00:01:26,759 Speaker 1: has a curfew at her house and wants me out 27 00:01:26,800 --> 00:01:30,320 Speaker 1: by midnight and wants her daughter home by midnight if 28 00:01:30,360 --> 00:01:34,000 Speaker 1: she's out with me or her friends. My girlfriend seems 29 00:01:34,040 --> 00:01:37,080 Speaker 1: to be under her mom's spell, and it's really irritating 30 00:01:37,080 --> 00:01:38,720 Speaker 1: me to the point that I want to break up 31 00:01:38,720 --> 00:01:41,440 Speaker 1: with her because I can't leave her. But I can't 32 00:01:41,520 --> 00:01:45,000 Speaker 1: leave her while she's pregnant. My friends think she's abiding 33 00:01:45,120 --> 00:01:48,160 Speaker 1: by her mother's rules because it's her way of distancing 34 00:01:48,200 --> 00:01:51,600 Speaker 1: herself from me. I don't get that feeling from her 35 00:01:51,640 --> 00:01:54,600 Speaker 1: because we talk about her mom's crazy rules all the time. 36 00:01:55,080 --> 00:01:58,120 Speaker 1: What I don't understand is why she won't stand up 37 00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:00,720 Speaker 1: to her mom. She lets her mom ask me all 38 00:02:00,880 --> 00:02:04,720 Speaker 1: kinds of personal questions about my friends, my finances, and 39 00:02:04,920 --> 00:02:08,320 Speaker 1: my upbringing. I am starting to hate her mother, and 40 00:02:08,360 --> 00:02:10,640 Speaker 1: it's getting to the point where I see my girlfriend 41 00:02:10,720 --> 00:02:14,160 Speaker 1: less and less because of her. I want to get married, 42 00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:16,600 Speaker 1: get a house for my family, and have a good 43 00:02:16,680 --> 00:02:20,520 Speaker 1: life without her mom's involvement. How can I get my 44 00:02:20,560 --> 00:02:27,080 Speaker 1: girlfriend from under her mom's spell? I am tired of sharing. Well, 45 00:02:27,200 --> 00:02:30,200 Speaker 1: you know, on this show we talk about mama's boys 46 00:02:30,360 --> 00:02:33,320 Speaker 1: a lot, we really do. And we never give mama's 47 00:02:33,360 --> 00:02:36,359 Speaker 1: boys a pass. We don't. We call them what they are, 48 00:02:36,480 --> 00:02:39,520 Speaker 1: mama's boys, you know, hanging on to the apron strings 49 00:02:39,520 --> 00:02:42,880 Speaker 1: and all of that. So I'm not about to let 50 00:02:42,919 --> 00:02:45,880 Speaker 1: your fiance off the hook either. I mean, it's time 51 00:02:46,280 --> 00:02:49,120 Speaker 1: for an ultimatum from you. She's got to make a choice. 52 00:02:49,240 --> 00:02:51,400 Speaker 1: She's got to grow up. She's got to either be 53 00:02:51,520 --> 00:02:54,840 Speaker 1: with you or with her mom. And that's not to 54 00:02:54,880 --> 00:02:57,400 Speaker 1: say forget leave her mom and all of that. Her 55 00:02:57,440 --> 00:02:59,960 Speaker 1: mom is gonna always be her mom, but she can't 56 00:03:00,040 --> 00:03:05,240 Speaker 1: and continually be her mommy's little baby. Yes she is, 57 00:03:06,040 --> 00:03:09,360 Speaker 1: you know. I mean, this woman is thirty years old 58 00:03:09,760 --> 00:03:13,320 Speaker 1: and about to have a whole husband and a baby, 59 00:03:13,480 --> 00:03:16,640 Speaker 1: her own family. She still can't be under her mom's 60 00:03:16,639 --> 00:03:20,520 Speaker 1: control as your wife. That won't work in a marriage. 61 00:03:21,040 --> 00:03:23,120 Speaker 1: You got to talk to her. You have to talk 62 00:03:23,160 --> 00:03:25,240 Speaker 1: to her. You gotta let her know how you feel. 63 00:03:25,320 --> 00:03:27,480 Speaker 1: You got to tell your plans for the marriage and 64 00:03:27,600 --> 00:03:31,200 Speaker 1: the family. Plans that include her mom as just the 65 00:03:31,360 --> 00:03:34,480 Speaker 1: grandmother for now. Okay, thank you, Mom, we got this. 66 00:03:35,560 --> 00:03:37,440 Speaker 1: But you know she can't be all up in the 67 00:03:37,440 --> 00:03:39,960 Speaker 1: middle of your relationship giving you the third degree when 68 00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:42,960 Speaker 1: she feels like it. No, tell her you're the father. 69 00:03:43,120 --> 00:03:45,400 Speaker 1: You will have a say in your baby's life periods. 70 00:03:45,400 --> 00:03:48,000 Speaker 1: Then you guys need to decide on a wedding date 71 00:03:48,600 --> 00:03:51,240 Speaker 1: and set a deadline for her to move out of 72 00:03:51,240 --> 00:03:55,200 Speaker 1: her mother's house. That house is toxic right now. This 73 00:03:55,280 --> 00:03:57,160 Speaker 1: is if you still want to future together. You say 74 00:03:57,200 --> 00:04:00,040 Speaker 1: you're moving further and further away, but I think you 75 00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:01,760 Speaker 1: still want to have a good life with her and 76 00:04:01,840 --> 00:04:03,600 Speaker 1: you can do that, but you gotta talk to her 77 00:04:03,600 --> 00:04:06,480 Speaker 1: and Mom has to definitely be out of the picture. 78 00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:12,600 Speaker 1: Jay J J Right, Junior, No, I'm gonna then, Junior, Okay, 79 00:04:12,640 --> 00:04:14,880 Speaker 1: I'll go all right, here we go. Um, you have 80 00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:17,880 Speaker 1: got to do this, but you gotta pull the mom 81 00:04:17,920 --> 00:04:20,760 Speaker 1: away from the daughter when you do this, and you 82 00:04:20,839 --> 00:04:24,440 Speaker 1: gotta go strong. You got to you gotta hit on 83 00:04:24,480 --> 00:04:27,480 Speaker 1: the mom. You have got to hit on the mom. Wait, 84 00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:32,680 Speaker 1: what hard possibly you got to come at all but 85 00:04:33,040 --> 00:04:37,040 Speaker 1: all your mack and all all the mac you got, 86 00:04:39,960 --> 00:04:42,479 Speaker 1: you got to go. I don't say her name is 87 00:04:42,480 --> 00:04:47,640 Speaker 1: Glad as miss Glad? Is you showing good in that 88 00:04:47,880 --> 00:04:54,880 Speaker 1: bath row? Baby? Damn damn girl, girl, you're rocking them slippers. 89 00:04:54,960 --> 00:05:00,240 Speaker 1: Oh my god, doing something to me? Yeah, and rub 90 00:05:00,279 --> 00:05:02,840 Speaker 1: on yourself when you talk to rub all over yourself 91 00:05:03,160 --> 00:05:10,279 Speaker 1: when with me some yeah. Yeah, you gotta stamp on 92 00:05:10,360 --> 00:05:16,640 Speaker 1: your nippole area when you talk. Yeah yeah, yeah yeah. 93 00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:21,240 Speaker 1: When you put that that head scarf on, that does something. 94 00:05:20,360 --> 00:05:25,320 Speaker 1: And then you gotta go like them. What is that you? 95 00:05:26,160 --> 00:05:32,080 Speaker 1: What is that you win? Is that? Is that white diamond? Damn? 96 00:05:32,279 --> 00:05:41,680 Speaker 1: Love me some white diamond? Yeah? You can't strong and 97 00:05:41,880 --> 00:05:45,040 Speaker 1: that will run her ass away? And you have the 98 00:05:45,200 --> 00:05:48,359 Speaker 1: daughter off his up. Now it could turn on you. 99 00:05:48,760 --> 00:05:51,400 Speaker 1: She may have. You may have to put down mama, 100 00:06:00,120 --> 00:06:08,239 Speaker 1: right you mergic this all. Let'm say yeah, yeah, okay. 101 00:06:09,880 --> 00:06:14,080 Speaker 1: Want to rub on yourself well on the nipple, on 102 00:06:14,160 --> 00:06:19,120 Speaker 1: your nipple, thank you? Jay, Come on, Junior, come on, 103 00:06:23,400 --> 00:06:27,040 Speaker 1: just hang on, hang on, Junior, we'll get to you 104 00:06:27,120 --> 00:06:31,880 Speaker 1: and the nephew of course. Uh wow, uh Jay, you 105 00:06:31,920 --> 00:06:35,039 Speaker 1: threw me with that, Miss Glad. It's all right. The 106 00:06:35,080 --> 00:06:38,800 Speaker 1: subject of the strawberry letter is I'm selfish and tired. 107 00:06:38,839 --> 00:06:41,720 Speaker 1: Of sharing. We'll be back at twenty three minutes after 108 00:06:41,760 --> 00:06:43,599 Speaker 1: the hour. We still have to hear from Junior. We 109 00:06:43,640 --> 00:06:46,680 Speaker 1: still have to hear from the nephew. It's I'm selfish 110 00:06:46,720 --> 00:06:49,200 Speaker 1: and tired of sharing. We'll get back into it. The 111 00:06:49,240 --> 00:06:53,200 Speaker 1: Strawberry letter for today. Right after this, you're listening to 112 00:06:53,320 --> 00:06:56,400 Speaker 1: the Steve Harvey Morning Show. All right, here we go. 113 00:06:56,920 --> 00:07:00,479 Speaker 1: We gotta recap today's Strawberry letter. The subject I'm selfish 114 00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:04,040 Speaker 1: and tired of sharing. A thirty two year old man 115 00:07:04,160 --> 00:07:06,960 Speaker 1: wrote in he and his girlfriend are together. They've been 116 00:07:07,000 --> 00:07:09,800 Speaker 1: together for four years. She's thirty, he's thirty two. Like 117 00:07:09,920 --> 00:07:12,679 Speaker 1: I said at the start of the relationship, it was great. 118 00:07:12,760 --> 00:07:16,600 Speaker 1: He proposed last year finally, and she said before she 119 00:07:16,680 --> 00:07:19,400 Speaker 1: said yes, she wanted to get the blessing of her mom. 120 00:07:19,720 --> 00:07:22,320 Speaker 1: She didn't get that because her mom was all up 121 00:07:22,360 --> 00:07:26,000 Speaker 1: in the business. She's asking him all kinds of questions. 122 00:07:26,760 --> 00:07:29,760 Speaker 1: He said his life has turned upside down since he proposed, 123 00:07:29,800 --> 00:07:32,400 Speaker 1: because now he found out that the girl is pregnant. 124 00:07:32,720 --> 00:07:37,200 Speaker 1: Fiance now is pregnant, so her mother told her to 125 00:07:37,280 --> 00:07:40,600 Speaker 1: move in with her and everything has to be done 126 00:07:40,640 --> 00:07:43,960 Speaker 1: by midnight. The fiance can't come over there and see her. 127 00:07:44,000 --> 00:07:46,840 Speaker 1: She has to be in by midnight, and she's all 128 00:07:46,880 --> 00:07:49,200 Speaker 1: in the business, asking them all kinds of questions. So 129 00:07:49,240 --> 00:07:52,280 Speaker 1: he wants to know how can he get his girlfriend 130 00:07:52,280 --> 00:07:55,000 Speaker 1: from under her mom's spell. He wants to raise his baby, 131 00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:57,040 Speaker 1: he wants to have a good family and a good life, 132 00:07:57,080 --> 00:08:00,440 Speaker 1: and he's tired of sharing his girlfriend with her mother. 133 00:08:00,920 --> 00:08:05,040 Speaker 1: So Jay said he should he should hit on the 134 00:08:05,120 --> 00:08:10,120 Speaker 1: mom and that'll run her away maybe. And then Junior, 135 00:08:10,160 --> 00:08:13,600 Speaker 1: what do you say, d I, what's the d d 136 00:08:13,760 --> 00:08:18,680 Speaker 1: I don't do it, don't do it. Don't marry marry 137 00:08:18,760 --> 00:08:21,960 Speaker 1: this girl. No, no, do not marry this girl. Don't 138 00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:24,200 Speaker 1: do it. You can't gonna get that ring back today. 139 00:08:24,480 --> 00:08:26,160 Speaker 1: That's what you need to do, Folks, don't getting the 140 00:08:26,240 --> 00:08:29,640 Speaker 1: ring back today. Because this is a preview or what 141 00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:33,920 Speaker 1: your marriage gonna look like. This is what's gonna happen 142 00:08:34,040 --> 00:08:36,040 Speaker 1: right after you get married. She's still not gonna be 143 00:08:36,040 --> 00:08:39,760 Speaker 1: able to move in with you, still not gonna bet 144 00:08:39,920 --> 00:08:42,319 Speaker 1: the house. You still gonna have to get that at midnight. 145 00:08:42,600 --> 00:08:45,000 Speaker 1: You still gonna have to do all this. You still everything. 146 00:08:45,160 --> 00:08:47,040 Speaker 1: And another thing I know about the mama too. Her 147 00:08:47,040 --> 00:08:49,000 Speaker 1: mama is struggling with the bills at that house. That's 148 00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:50,960 Speaker 1: only why you asked somebody thirty to move back in, 149 00:08:51,080 --> 00:08:53,920 Speaker 1: because you need help with d bills. That's what growing 150 00:08:53,960 --> 00:08:58,120 Speaker 1: the MoMA. Mommy, help this rent this gas her Mamma, No, 151 00:08:58,400 --> 00:09:00,960 Speaker 1: don't do this. Man, let this go. I'm just mamas. 152 00:09:01,640 --> 00:09:04,360 Speaker 1: You heard it from the single guy. Don't do it 153 00:09:04,520 --> 00:09:11,080 Speaker 1: DDI previous. Oh lord, I'm almost afraid to ask. All right, nephew, 154 00:09:11,080 --> 00:09:14,160 Speaker 1: what you got subject? I'm selfish and tired of sharing. 155 00:09:14,440 --> 00:09:17,640 Speaker 1: You know what. He's thirty two, she's thirty. She's a 156 00:09:17,679 --> 00:09:21,080 Speaker 1: mama's girl. What's going on? Okay? Can I say what 157 00:09:21,160 --> 00:09:23,800 Speaker 1: I want to say? Yes? Carla? Can I say what 158 00:09:23,840 --> 00:09:26,640 Speaker 1: I want to say? This is my letter? Go ahead, 159 00:09:26,720 --> 00:09:31,480 Speaker 1: she's gonna say yes. Do it? Okay, Well, maybe she's 160 00:09:31,520 --> 00:09:34,280 Speaker 1: gonna say yes to say what I want to say. 161 00:09:34,600 --> 00:09:38,440 Speaker 1: Your future mother in law need a back buster. She 162 00:09:38,679 --> 00:09:42,320 Speaker 1: needs somebody to bust her back out. I'm sorry. You 163 00:09:42,360 --> 00:09:44,880 Speaker 1: know what, when people are in other people's business, that's 164 00:09:44,920 --> 00:09:48,120 Speaker 1: because they ain't got no beastiness. That means she needs 165 00:09:48,120 --> 00:09:51,880 Speaker 1: some she needs some band. She need her back busket. 166 00:09:52,160 --> 00:09:55,000 Speaker 1: You need to find somebody to go in there and 167 00:09:55,200 --> 00:09:59,600 Speaker 1: just well, mama out you need a Mandinko warrior. You 168 00:09:59,640 --> 00:10:02,640 Speaker 1: need him Tombo on a larger one. You need some 169 00:10:04,240 --> 00:10:08,040 Speaker 1: mama out because guess what, Guess what? Because guess what? 170 00:10:08,080 --> 00:10:10,800 Speaker 1: When that's happening, the spell is broken. Mama don't care 171 00:10:10,840 --> 00:10:14,440 Speaker 1: what the hell y'all doing, because Mama is satisfied. Okay, 172 00:10:14,600 --> 00:10:16,920 Speaker 1: never tell you something in order to get out, in 173 00:10:17,040 --> 00:10:19,040 Speaker 1: order to let me let me, how can I put this? 174 00:10:19,200 --> 00:10:23,720 Speaker 1: Uh if if? In order to you? How can I say? 175 00:10:23,800 --> 00:10:27,199 Speaker 1: Sometimes you are create. Sometimes you have to create an 176 00:10:27,320 --> 00:10:31,000 Speaker 1: entanglement in order to untangle what you're trying to keep 177 00:10:31,040 --> 00:10:32,880 Speaker 1: for yourself. That I ought, My God, I think I 178 00:10:32,920 --> 00:10:35,000 Speaker 1: said something. Did you see what I said? Sometimes you 179 00:10:35,040 --> 00:10:39,040 Speaker 1: have to create an entanglement you want to auder yourself. 180 00:10:39,120 --> 00:10:41,560 Speaker 1: Then you got to tangle mama up into something else. 181 00:10:41,679 --> 00:10:44,400 Speaker 1: You got to give mama's backbusted out, because guess what. 182 00:10:44,640 --> 00:10:46,880 Speaker 1: Once you give mama over there loving with somebody else, 183 00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:48,600 Speaker 1: guess what. She ain't got time to food with you. 184 00:10:48,640 --> 00:10:50,360 Speaker 1: She ain't got to worry about this baby. She didn't 185 00:10:50,400 --> 00:10:52,640 Speaker 1: got time to worry about her daughter. You got to 186 00:10:52,880 --> 00:10:56,360 Speaker 1: go in there and have somebody for mama and lay 187 00:10:56,440 --> 00:11:00,679 Speaker 1: mama's answer your your your response is kind of like 188 00:11:00,840 --> 00:11:07,240 Speaker 1: Jay's only you want him to find someone I don't want. Yeah, 189 00:11:07,480 --> 00:11:13,680 Speaker 1: somebody else to be dealt with another way. We both 190 00:11:13,679 --> 00:11:16,920 Speaker 1: agree in the same YEA somebody needs to hit that, 191 00:11:17,480 --> 00:11:23,520 Speaker 1: either him or an older man. I wish insistently, consistently 192 00:11:23,800 --> 00:11:28,679 Speaker 1: and consistently. Jay is at least three times a week, Okay, 193 00:11:28,920 --> 00:11:30,520 Speaker 1: three times a week. You don't have time to get 194 00:11:30,559 --> 00:11:33,000 Speaker 1: it nobody else business, because when you look up, damn 195 00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:34,559 Speaker 1: he on his way back over here. You know what 196 00:11:34,600 --> 00:11:37,800 Speaker 1: I mean? Three times. When you're getting it, you ain't 197 00:11:37,840 --> 00:11:40,480 Speaker 1: got time to get in other folks business. I believe 198 00:11:40,520 --> 00:11:46,200 Speaker 1: that you're convinced she's not getting any You're convinced. No, no, 199 00:11:46,520 --> 00:11:48,160 Speaker 1: you don't have time to get now. You're too far 200 00:11:48,200 --> 00:11:52,240 Speaker 1: in this woman business. Well, she is the grandmother. Don't 201 00:11:52,240 --> 00:11:54,880 Speaker 1: forget about that. You're gonna need someone to help you 202 00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:59,600 Speaker 1: with the base needing to Hey, wait a minute, man, 203 00:12:00,200 --> 00:12:03,000 Speaker 1: what I got a grandmother? I don't need to hit that. 204 00:12:06,360 --> 00:12:09,440 Speaker 1: Wait a minute, man, And your grandmother is so cute, junior? 205 00:12:09,760 --> 00:12:12,480 Speaker 1: Have you don't have you witness a couple of days? 206 00:12:12,480 --> 00:12:15,720 Speaker 1: Have you witnessed a couple of days? Junior? Witness coup date? 207 00:12:15,760 --> 00:12:18,600 Speaker 1: When you ain't here from Grandmama. Yeah, it's been a 208 00:12:18,600 --> 00:12:20,280 Speaker 1: couple of day. Man. I think if I'm called right 209 00:12:20,320 --> 00:12:27,480 Speaker 1: up up in radio, how did you do over? Okay? 210 00:12:28,440 --> 00:12:30,560 Speaker 1: But I mean, I think we can all agree that 211 00:12:30,600 --> 00:12:33,040 Speaker 1: she needs to stand up to her mom. She just 212 00:12:33,120 --> 00:12:35,360 Speaker 1: can't let her mom just be all in her business 213 00:12:35,360 --> 00:12:38,280 Speaker 1: and run her life like this, especially with her trying 214 00:12:38,280 --> 00:12:41,200 Speaker 1: to have her own up in here, right up in 215 00:12:41,280 --> 00:12:44,800 Speaker 1: here on this area here and Jay, we don't have 216 00:12:44,880 --> 00:12:47,719 Speaker 1: to see that. We can we can picture what are 217 00:12:48,080 --> 00:12:52,000 Speaker 1: what area? Is that? All right? Listen? Post your comments 218 00:12:52,000 --> 00:12:55,520 Speaker 1: on today's Strawberry Crazy Strawberry Letter at Steve HARVEFM and 219 00:12:55,640 --> 00:12:58,920 Speaker 1: Instagram and Facebook. Check out the Strawberry Letter podcast under 220 00:12:58,920 --> 00:13:01,680 Speaker 1: Man coming up and forty six minutes after the hour, 221 00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:08,160 Speaker 1: sports Talk with Junior. Right after this bus Beck, you're 222 00:13:08,160 --> 00:13:10,640 Speaker 1: listening to the Dame Harbay Morning Show,