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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam. This is John the og story

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Speaker 1: Time podcast host. Oh yeah, we got some great stories

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Speaker 1: coming up.

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Speaker 2: But before that, we get a teeny two minute break

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Speaker 2: from the sponsors that keep this show propped up like

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Speaker 2: a little house.

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Speaker 1: Oh you.

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Speaker 3: I asked my sister in law to cook a food

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Speaker 3: she's allergic to, and my brother is furious.

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Speaker 4: You might be the a hole. Yeah, you just might,

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Speaker 4: eh a little bit.

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Speaker 3: Thirty eight mail married with three kids. Recently, my mom

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Speaker 3: turned sixty five and begged to see her kids and

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Speaker 3: grandchildren on her birthday. I have an older brother who's

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Speaker 3: married with four kids ages two to twelve. Only the

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Speaker 3: youngest two are his and a much younger brother, twenty three,

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Speaker 3: who's single. My wife and I offered to host a

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Speaker 3: weekend get together. By the way, this comes from antisocial

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Speaker 3: apparently on the r slash okay storytime subreddit. So my

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Speaker 3: older brother had to work late the first night, but

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Speaker 3: his wife, Emily fake name, offered to come earlier in

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Speaker 3: the day with the kids and cook.

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Speaker 4: Dinner for everyone.

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Speaker 3: Emily is a great cook and her parents own a

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Speaker 3: local restaurant that's well known for a dish serve only

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Speaker 3: once a month. Emily is the chef for that dish,

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Speaker 3: and my wife and I have had it, but my

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Speaker 3: mom and brother haven't tried it. I asked Emily when

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Speaker 3: she arrived that day if she would make the dish,

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Speaker 3: and she agreed. I had most of what she needed,

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Speaker 3: but I told her to text my younger brother for

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Speaker 3: any extra items and I would pay for them.

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Speaker 4: Dinner went great.

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Speaker 3: Food was wonderful, but at some point my mom took

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Speaker 3: a picture of her plate and sent it to my

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Speaker 3: older brother with a caption that said something like you're

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Speaker 3: missing out, and then it all into crap. No, the

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Speaker 3: reason Emily only makes this dish once a month at

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Speaker 3: the restaurant is because she's highly allergic to one of

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Speaker 3: the main ingredients. Her parents are widely protective of the

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Speaker 3: recipe and won't let anyone else cook it. I assumed

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Speaker 3: this was common knowledge within my family, but she and

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Speaker 3: my brother have only been together about five years, so

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Speaker 3: maybe it hasn't come up. In any case, my brother

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Speaker 3: was furious that I asked her to make it. My

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Speaker 3: little brother said that I was disgusting, and my mom

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Speaker 3: dramatically claimed that I put her in danger. Frankly, I

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Speaker 3: think the reaction was ridiculous. She's a grown woman and

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Speaker 3: clearly knows how to manage her allergy. It's not like

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Speaker 3: she ate it. Also, Emily didn't seem upset about anything

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Speaker 3: and was off watching a movie with all the kids,

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Speaker 3: so she didn't hear any of this. I kind of

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Speaker 3: thought it had blown over after a couple hours, until

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Speaker 3: my older brother got there around midnight and found Emily

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Speaker 3: in the kitchen eating some cereal. He told me it

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Speaker 3: was bs that I made her cook a meal she

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Speaker 3: can't eat and then let her eat cereal again.

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Speaker 4: This woman is a grown up.

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Speaker 3: She could have asked my little brother to get her

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Speaker 3: something else to cook for herself, but she didn't. At

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Speaker 3: that point, I was tired, My wife had cleaned the

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Speaker 3: kitchen and Emily had gotten the kids in bed, So

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Speaker 3: when my older brother pulled out a chicken saying he

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Speaker 3: was going to cook something for Emily, I put my

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Speaker 3: foot down and said, no, I feel like my family

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Speaker 3: baby's Emily. As it is lots of reason for this,

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Speaker 3: I understand it, but it's frustrating, and I wasn't willing

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Speaker 3: to let my brother make another mess cooking a whole

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Speaker 3: other meal at twelve am.

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Speaker 4: Okay, well, now you are they Yeah, now I feel like, okay.

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Speaker 4: My understanding originally was that they were like at the

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Speaker 4: restaurant and she was like cooking them a meal. But

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Speaker 4: it seems that they were at their like a house.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. I think I think probably had the gathering at

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Speaker 3: her house or something, and then you know, told Emily

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Speaker 3: to get the ingredients or to text the little brother

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Speaker 3: to get the ingredients. Oh, he'd pay for it. So yeah,

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Speaker 3: it sounds like they're at a house and so Emily

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Speaker 3: hasn't eaten anything except for cereal.

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Speaker 4: Wait, okay, okay. At first I was like, oh, well,

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Speaker 4: you know O p asked. Emily could have said no

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Speaker 4: and then yes, made two dishes or really had help

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Speaker 4: making two dishes. But now if he's like no, it's

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Speaker 4: like she can't beat out all. Yeah, what's weird? Now

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Speaker 4: you're back, We've we've circled back around.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: Whoa.

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Speaker 3: The whole rest of the weekend was awkward and strained,

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Speaker 3: and basically ended with my mom and younger brother telling

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Speaker 3: me that I ruined the whole get together. Do I

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Speaker 3: not get to set boundaries in my own house? But

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Speaker 3: there are some relevant comments, So rogue B says, Wow,

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Speaker 3: you're the a hole.

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Speaker 4: Why didn't she let her eat?

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Speaker 3: The comment about everyone babying her makes me think that

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Speaker 3: you may be telling only part of the story, and

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Speaker 3: OPI responds, I wasn't not letting her eat. She had

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Speaker 3: some cereal. That's ridiculous.

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Speaker 4: Shit's cereal.

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Speaker 3: My family, especially my brother, got defensive and baby her

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Speaker 3: for a lot of reasons, and some of them are good.

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Speaker 3: Emily's family is tough on her, and she has trouble

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Speaker 3: saying no to things, So.

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Speaker 4: That's kind of see you capitalize that. Yeahs like capital

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Speaker 4: is going on here.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but she's an adult and she has to learn

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Speaker 3: to do that otherwise things like this happened. Another deleted

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Speaker 3: account says, I think my brain broke trying to work

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Speaker 3: this out.

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Speaker 4: Emily is an adult, right, She could have said, I'll.

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Speaker 3: Happily make that dish, but I'll need something else to

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Speaker 3: eat for myself, or I don't want to spend the

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Speaker 3: whole day cooking something that I can't eat. Did Emily

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Speaker 3: ever say that she was upset about this? I feel

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Speaker 3: like her opinion on this is the only thing that matters.

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Speaker 3: Having said that, you say in your post that she

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Speaker 3: didn't eat any of it. You didn't think that it

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Speaker 3: was weird that she cooked all day and then sat

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Speaker 3: not eating anything out of family dinner. Did nobody else

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Speaker 3: notice this or think it was weird? This is the

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Speaker 3: first Emma the a whole post about food allergies I've

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Speaker 3: read where the person cooked their own poison. Opie responds, right,

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Speaker 3: she could have said either of those things. She never

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Speaker 3: seemed to upset. No, she knows how much people like

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Speaker 3: that dish. I do know that she's tried to stop

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Speaker 3: making it at the restaurant, but it caused fights with

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Speaker 3: her parents. Oh boy, I don't think making it for

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Speaker 3: family is the same thing. Once she finished cooking, she

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Speaker 3: served my mom and my wife and then went off

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Speaker 3: to get her kids and mine settled with a movie.

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Speaker 3: I think we just assumed she would eat later on.

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Speaker 3: It just feels weird. It just feels weird.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Was Opie aware of the sister in law's allergy? Opie responds,

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Speaker 3: I did know about the allergy. She's cooked it for

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Speaker 3: my wife and I before. It was my mom and

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Speaker 3: younger brother that weren't aware. I guess I just thought

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Speaker 3: she would cook something for herself at the same time,

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Speaker 3: or maybe eat what the kids had earlier in the night.

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Speaker 3: She's not the kind of person to complain about things later.

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Speaker 3: She's incredibly kind. I feel like it sounds like I

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Speaker 3: don't like her, but I do. Bitter Nerdette says, Wait,

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Speaker 3: so she cooked for the kids, then cooked this, and

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Speaker 3: you you expected her to either eat with the kids

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Speaker 3: or cook another separate meal.

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Speaker 4: You really did f up.

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Speaker 3: You treated her like a servant, then refused to let

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Speaker 3: her get fed properly when someone else tried to rectify

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Speaker 3: your mistake.

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Speaker 4: You took advantage in the worst.

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Speaker 3: Way and then blamed it on her because she has troubles,

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Speaker 3: saying no hosting one oh one, look after your guests,

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Speaker 3: make sure that they have somewhere to sleep and are

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Speaker 3: fed correctly. You failed big time on that alone. You

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Speaker 3: wouldn't do that to someone you don't really know. Why

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Speaker 3: the heck is it acceptable to your sister, And then

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Speaker 3: you were commenting on here blaming her for not sticking

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Speaker 3: up for herself and saying, no, it was your mistake

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Speaker 3: not making sure she was fed. It was your fault

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Speaker 3: for choosing a meal she couldn't eat, and it was

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Speaker 3: your fault that she went to bed hungry because your

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Speaker 3: precious kitchen was clean. You want a host, be a host.

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Speaker 3: Don't have a hissy fit because you dropped the ball.

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Speaker 3: Don't have a hissy fit because your boundaries got broken

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Speaker 3: whilst someone tried to fix your pick up. And stop

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Speaker 3: taking advantage of people's kindness.

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Speaker 4: Oh, this comments versus.

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Speaker 3: Reading some things to say. I saw your first post title.

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Speaker 3: By the way, stopping visitors to cook after midnight in

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Speaker 3: my house is a wee bit different to this one,

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Speaker 3: almost as if you tried to make yourself look.

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Speaker 4: Better it didn't work.

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Speaker 3: Oh, and reading your other comments, you even know she's

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Speaker 3: trying to stop cooking that dish and has issues with

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Speaker 3: her parents about it. Come on, family, shouldn't make her

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Speaker 3: cook something she doesn't want to cook. If it's that

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Speaker 3: serious she's fighting about it. Wow, that's a big comment. Honestly,

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Speaker 3: facts agree.

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Speaker 4: No, I was gonna cause at again beginning of this post,

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Speaker 4: it's like, Oh, she cooks us at the restaurant. She's

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Speaker 4: probably fine with it. Oh, people's like, oh, can you

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Speaker 4: do this for my mom's birthday? And I was like okay,

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Speaker 4: And then we go into one she's trying to stop

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Speaker 4: cooking the dish. Two you wouldn't let her eat. It's like, yeay,

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Speaker 4: it would have been I think it would have been

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Speaker 4: a mistake, but perhaps a rectifiable mistake if op had

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Speaker 4: been like, oh, yeah, can you make this for me?

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Speaker 4: And then after was like, oh my god, I thought

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Speaker 4: she would have made something else or have or eaten

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Speaker 4: with the kids or something. And then when the brother's

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Speaker 4: trying to make the chicken, she was like, oh my god,

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Speaker 4: I didn't even think that's my bad.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: She went further and was like, no, you can't have

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Speaker 4: the chicken either.

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Speaker 3: Right, that's so ridiculous. Yeah, so you're the ale and

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Speaker 3: you doubled down on it.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: But Opie responds to that comment, Okay, I get what

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Speaker 3: we were saying, and maybe I'm being defensive and doubling

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Speaker 3: down there you go. I don't want her to feel

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Speaker 3: like a servant. I do think she's a good person.

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Speaker 3: She's wonderful to my brother. I just didn't get why

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Speaker 3: she didn't just eat something else. But I guess I

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Speaker 3: could have acknowledged it or offered her something. Someone else

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Speaker 3: pointed out in another comment too, that she was helping

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Speaker 3: with my kids and hers, so she may have been

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Speaker 3: too busy to make anything else on what.

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Speaker 4: The special dish was.

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Speaker 3: Galpal Nikki says, OPI made a comment that the allergy

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Speaker 3: is peanuts, so I'm thinking pad time. Oh p says

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Speaker 3: it's similar, but it's a unique dish. I've never had

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Speaker 3: anything like it anywhere else. The restaurant is upscale, gourmet

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Speaker 3: international food. It's very expensive, and I was trying to

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Speaker 3: treat my mom to the dish they're locally renowned for

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Speaker 3: in retrospect. This was stupid and this gem of a comment.

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Speaker 3: Opie says, I feel like this is a terrible time

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Speaker 3: to mention that she doesn't get.

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Speaker 4: Paid at the restaurant. You shouldn't have said that she

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Speaker 4: doesn't get paid at the restaurant to make a food

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Speaker 4: that she's deathly allergic to and is trying to stop making.

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Speaker 4: Why does she work at this restaurant?

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Speaker 3: Well, I guess it's like a family restaurant. I think,

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Speaker 3: oh my god. But still ope, he continues.

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Speaker 1: I get it.

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Speaker 3: I'm a wiener and was really in the wrong here.

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Speaker 3: I'm going to apologize.

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Speaker 4: Oh okay, he realized that's good.

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Speaker 3: January's daughter says she doesn't get paid for handling poison

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Speaker 3: all day. What is wrong with her family, and the

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Speaker 3: verdict is that the opie is an a hole. But

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Speaker 3: there is an update and an update I can see

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Speaker 3: that I'm definitely the a hole. I showed my wife

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Speaker 3: this post and the replies this morning. She hasn't commented

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Speaker 3: much on this situation and said today that it was

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Speaker 3: because she was so embarrassed by my behavior that she

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Speaker 3: didn't know what to say, but she agreed with almost everyone.

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Speaker 3: I called Emily this morning and my brother answered her phone.

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Speaker 3: I talked to him for about an hour and then

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Speaker 3: was able to apologize to Emily. She explained that she

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Speaker 3: said yes to cooking because she knew how much I

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Speaker 3: like the dish, and also she doesn't think I like

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Speaker 3: her that much, so she was worried I would be

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Speaker 3: upset if she said no.

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Speaker 4: Oh.

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Speaker 3: My brother also explained that her allergy has topical effects

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Speaker 3: as well, and the cooking process gets the allergen everywhere,

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Speaker 3: which is why she hates cooking it so much, and

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Speaker 3: also why she can't make it and why she can't

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Speaker 3: make anything else for herself. At the same time, please

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Speaker 3: note that I know I was in the A hole

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Speaker 3: even without this info. It just makes it worse. It

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Speaker 3: also makes me look at the situation with her parents

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Speaker 3: differently because they've been having her make this meal for

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Speaker 3: years and down playing the skin reactions like it's not

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Speaker 3: a big deal. I work in a really cutthroat, callous environment.

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Speaker 3: It's not an excuse to be thoughtless with my family.

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Speaker 3: But I do think it has some clear effects in

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Speaker 3: my general attitude towards other people.

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Speaker 4: I do like Emily.

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Speaker 3: She improved my brother's life profoundly when they got together,

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Speaker 3: which is part of why my family loves her like

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Speaker 3: they do. And by the way, you can improve our

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Speaker 3: lives by listening to full episodes of stories just like this.

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Speaker 3: Just go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or your favorite podcast

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Speaker 3: app and search Okay, story time, search it up and

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Speaker 3: there is another relevant update. Do we have any little

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Speaker 3: thoughts before we go into it?

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Speaker 4: Man, oh man, This poor girl, I mean, she's working

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Speaker 4: at her family's restaurant for free, for free, making food

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Speaker 4: that she's allergic to, and then she's caning reaction, and

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Speaker 4: then her in laws are like, we also want you

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Speaker 4: to make this even though you're allergic to it, right,

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Speaker 4: So literally, no one is standing up for this poor

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Speaker 4: girl except for her husband, and then her husband is

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Speaker 4: getting flack for it by any But if you realized

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Speaker 4: that he was wrong, that's good.

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Speaker 3: That's that's what we can Yeah, Emily was more gracious

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Speaker 3: accepting my apology than I deserve. But she did also

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Speaker 3: tell me that she won't be accepting invites to my

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Speaker 3: house again for a while, which I think is fair.

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Speaker 4: Oh wow, so she was about this.

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Speaker 3: I was not at first reading a lot of the comments,

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Speaker 3: but I needed the reality check.

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Speaker 4: Thanks.

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Speaker 3: There are some more relevant comments, then, Opie says again,

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Speaker 3: I've accepted that I'm the a hole here and agreed

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Speaker 3: that if I really wanted her to make this dish,

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Speaker 3: I should have offered to make her something separately. There

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Speaker 3: are a lot of comments about my brother and my

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Speaker 3: mom that aren't sitting well with me, but there are

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Speaker 3: things that were left out, so that's understandable. Just want

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Speaker 3: to clarify that my younger brother and my mom both

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Speaker 3: helped in the kitchen and with the kids. They also

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Speaker 3: spent a lot of time hanging out with Emily while

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Speaker 3: she cooked, and Zeniza Banana says that doesn't make this better.

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Speaker 3: Having people hang out with you while trying not to

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Speaker 3: have an allergic reaction does not improve things. You still

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Speaker 3: don't get it. You shouldn't have asked her to make

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Speaker 3: it in the first place, you door knob, You're the

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Speaker 3: a hole.

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Speaker 4: I think Ope gets I think I disagree with that comment.

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Speaker 3: I do think opas Yeah, yeah, I think I think

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Speaker 3: Ope is just giving more detail, maybe to save slack

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Speaker 3: from like or to give slack to like the brother

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Speaker 3: and the mom.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: I think that's all.

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Speaker 3: But Opeka, that's it all you can do, so true,

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Speaker 3: apologize and move forward.

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Speaker 4: So we're gonna move forward to the next story. Here

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Speaker 4: you go, so we will see you. Ex sat. My

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Speaker 4: sister ruined my honeymoon, so I ask for a proper

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Speaker 4: apology as you should. You deserve one. Hi. Sorry if

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Speaker 4: this is too long, my life is spiraling now and

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Speaker 4: as a long time viewer, I would really like all

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Speaker 4: of your takes throwaway account as my family uses media

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Speaker 4: fake names used. If you don't like long reads. Sorry,

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Speaker 4: I shortened this from seven thousand words. By the way,

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Speaker 4: this comes from Family Drama Center on the Okay Storytime

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Speaker 4: supparate it. So my full family involved. I thirty seven,

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Speaker 4: male husband, thirty six, male sister, Amber forty five female

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Speaker 4: her partner, Tim forty seven, male brother forty two male

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Speaker 4: mom sixty six female. Cassie special needs sixty seven female,

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Speaker 4: semi verbal. Important information. My mom, sister, and I are

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Speaker 4: in the care field. My mom is a retired care

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Speaker 4: worker for over twenty five years, my sister two years

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Speaker 4: in carefield, and I eleven years in carefield. At any time,

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Speaker 4: Cassie has to be with either my mom, sister, or I,

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Speaker 4: as she is not independent. This was my mom's, sister

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Speaker 4: and Cassie's third cruise. This was everyone else's first cruise.

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Speaker 4: My husband and I were married this year twenty twenty four,

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Speaker 4: on our eleventh year. My mom has been talking for

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Speaker 4: years about having her immediate family on one big family

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Speaker 4: cruise on her retirement year. This year she retired. She

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Speaker 4: informed my husband and I that she would pay for

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Speaker 4: our portion, as well as a balcony suite as a

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Speaker 4: honeymoon present. She told us that though this is a

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Speaker 4: family cruise, we are to treat it like a honeymoon

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Speaker 4: and relax, enjoy and not distress, also to have lots

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Speaker 4: of time to ourselves. We were both worried as it

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Speaker 4: was a lot of money, plus mixing a honeymoon with

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Speaker 4: a family cruise seemed daunting. We weren't sure how to

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Speaker 4: juggle everything, but my mom told us not to worry.

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Speaker 4: We convinced her to allow us to pay for any

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Speaker 4: extra expenses like drinks, items bought on and off cruise.

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Speaker 4: She agreed. We both thanked her profusely and showed how

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Speaker 4: grateful we were throughout the trip. Unfortunately, our honeymoon Sash

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Speaker 4: family cruise ended up being an emotional disaster that huts

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Speaker 4: up though my husband and I at times we were

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Speaker 4: happy and did our best to overcome the overwhelming stress.

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Speaker 4: There were a lot of bullying and temper tantrums from

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Speaker 4: my sister that were unnecessary and uncalled for, directed towards

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Speaker 4: me mostly and sometimes at everyone else. Though my sister

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Speaker 4: has always been high strung and over opinionated about most situations,

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Speaker 4: she has also been one of my husband's and eyes

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Speaker 4: biggest supporters, which we value highly. Just by being gay,

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Speaker 4: my husband lost his entire family for his choice, so

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Speaker 4: any love and support is something we value highly. I

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Speaker 4: don't want you to get the wrong idea. We love

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Speaker 4: my sister, but her treatment towards us was not okay.

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Speaker 4: Before the cruise, my siblings, husband, and Tim met up

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Speaker 4: the cruise Tapa came up, and we all agreed that

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Speaker 4: giving our mom one day to herself to enjoy the

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Speaker 4: cruise without having to take care of car would be

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Speaker 4: a nice thank you to her. My mom was also

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Speaker 4: paying for most of my sisters and Tim's expenses and

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Speaker 4: all brothers' expenses as well. This was her choice. We

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Speaker 4: talked about how either Amber and Tim or husband and

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Speaker 4: me would take Cassie for the first half of the

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Speaker 4: day and then we would switch. Since both my sister

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Speaker 4: and I are in the care field, it only made

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Speaker 4: sense to not have us together. It was a discussion,

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Speaker 4: not a set in stone plant. However, on the cruise

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Speaker 4: it quickly became clear that my brother and Tim got

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Speaker 4: a free pass not to look after Cassie, and the

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Speaker 4: one day of taking Cassie turned into four days of care,

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Speaker 4: lasting between three to five hours on our downtime each time.

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Speaker 4: This was never agreed upon, never discussed, never brought up

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Speaker 4: to me or my husband. The three occasions that Cassie

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Speaker 4: was put in my care were out of nowhere, though

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Speaker 4: I accepted all three times as to not cause a scene,

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Speaker 4: and of course I wanted my mom to relax. All

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Speaker 4: three times, my sister and Mom would go to the

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Speaker 4: spa to spend time together. This is weird. Yeah, this

386
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Speaker 4: is weird because there was supposed to be one day

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Speaker 4: that op was taking care of Cassie, it seems like,

388
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Speaker 4: and the rest was supposed to be like Opie and

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Speaker 4: Opie's husband off like honeymoony.

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Speaker 3: Right, and then even like when they were taking care

391
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Speaker 3: of it was supposed to be like half and half. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: but I know he said it wasn't like in set

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Speaker 3: like set and stone plan.

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Speaker 4: But still it's like, yeah.

395
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Speaker 3: I feel like I feel like they maybe should have

396
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Speaker 3: some consideration for you know, their free time and stuff

397
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Speaker 3: on the cruise.

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Speaker 4: Especially because the mom brought it up. But it seems

399
00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:29,560
Speaker 4: like she's, you know, she's not even considering what she said. Yeah, yeah,

400
00:17:29,600 --> 00:17:30,320
Speaker 4: she's like, let's.

401
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Speaker 3: Go on a family cruise, but like just because I

402
00:17:32,160 --> 00:17:34,719
Speaker 3: want to relax, Yeah, you guys can do whatever.

403
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Speaker 4: The fourth time, my husband and I looked after Cassie,

404
00:17:37,560 --> 00:17:40,199
Speaker 4: just us so my mom could enjoy around four hours

405
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Speaker 4: by herself alone because she needed a break. This time,

406
00:17:43,200 --> 00:17:46,159
Speaker 4: it was our choice as she looked so stressed. She

407
00:17:46,359 --> 00:17:49,960
Speaker 4: enjoyed the solo time alone. I love Cassie. She's family,

408
00:17:50,200 --> 00:17:52,920
Speaker 4: but she's also work. She needs a lot of help

409
00:17:52,960 --> 00:17:55,359
Speaker 4: to do most things. My husband did his best to

410
00:17:55,400 --> 00:17:58,400
Speaker 4: help out, but I was the primary care I was happy,

411
00:17:58,440 --> 00:18:01,160
Speaker 4: Cassie was happy, But the three times I was given

412
00:18:01,160 --> 00:18:04,399
Speaker 4: the task was by Amber, not by Mom. Each time

413
00:18:04,600 --> 00:18:06,840
Speaker 4: my husband and I had to cancel our plans together,

414
00:18:06,920 --> 00:18:09,399
Speaker 4: there were one time events and couple activities on the

415
00:18:09,440 --> 00:18:12,520
Speaker 4: cruise we wanted to experience and weren't given a choice.

416
00:18:12,560 --> 00:18:15,119
Speaker 4: It was our turn to take her and we did.

417
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Speaker 4: No matter what I did, I always managed to do

418
00:18:17,960 --> 00:18:20,840
Speaker 4: something wrong. No matter how hard I tried to follow

419
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Speaker 4: Amber's instructions, I always missed something. She never stopped reminding

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Speaker 4: me how lucky it was that Mom was spending so

421
00:18:26,960 --> 00:18:29,240
Speaker 4: much money on my husband and I, how grateful we

422
00:18:29,280 --> 00:18:32,120
Speaker 4: should be. Each time we went to buy a special drink,

423
00:18:32,200 --> 00:18:34,760
Speaker 4: she would remind us it cost extra money. Each time

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00:18:34,800 --> 00:18:37,960
Speaker 4: we discussed buying pictures or merchandise, she reminded us not

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00:18:38,119 --> 00:18:41,160
Speaker 4: to abuse our mom's kindness. One day, she would encourage

426
00:18:41,200 --> 00:18:43,880
Speaker 4: talking to our mom about purchasing something, the next day

427
00:18:44,000 --> 00:18:46,680
Speaker 4: telling me, I'm being selfish and not thinking about Mom,

428
00:18:46,760 --> 00:18:48,960
Speaker 4: when all I did was retell what she said to

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Speaker 4: me the previous day. On many occasions during dinner in

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00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:54,399
Speaker 4: the crowded dining hall, she would either slow her speech

431
00:18:54,480 --> 00:18:56,919
Speaker 4: to talk to me like a child, or try and

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Speaker 4: teach me how to do things properly so I don't

433
00:18:59,600 --> 00:19:01,879
Speaker 4: screw up next time. There was even a time that

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00:19:01,960 --> 00:19:04,439
Speaker 4: she handed me a signature photo album book for our

435
00:19:04,480 --> 00:19:07,600
Speaker 4: Weight Stuff to sign for Cassie. I was very overwhelmed

436
00:19:07,640 --> 00:19:10,520
Speaker 4: and had an anxiety attack and kind of blinked. Amber

437
00:19:10,600 --> 00:19:12,720
Speaker 4: was yelling instructions at me where she could have easily

438
00:19:12,760 --> 00:19:16,399
Speaker 4: done what she wanted herself. Then after continued to berate

439
00:19:16,520 --> 00:19:20,080
Speaker 4: me in front of over forty people. I was utterly humiliated.

440
00:19:20,240 --> 00:19:22,399
Speaker 4: She said she couldn't fathom how I couldn't understand the

441
00:19:22,480 --> 00:19:25,480
Speaker 4: simplest of instructions. I have never in all my life

442
00:19:25,480 --> 00:19:29,160
Speaker 4: been so torn down by her. She treated me so poorly.

443
00:19:29,280 --> 00:19:31,760
Speaker 4: I was up most nights sick. I couldn't figure out

444
00:19:31,760 --> 00:19:32,560
Speaker 4: what I was doing wrong.

445
00:19:32,720 --> 00:19:32,840
Speaker 3: Oh.

446
00:19:33,200 --> 00:19:35,639
Speaker 4: I wanted to enjoy myself, but felt like I was

447
00:19:35,680 --> 00:19:38,800
Speaker 4: in a nightmare. My husband was furious. I asked my

448
00:19:38,880 --> 00:19:41,160
Speaker 4: mom if she knew what was going on. She said yes,

449
00:19:41,520 --> 00:19:45,920
Speaker 4: but wouldn't tell us what I said. Why tell us,

450
00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:49,200
Speaker 4: I said, I'd go talk to Amber. My mom begged

451
00:19:49,200 --> 00:19:51,399
Speaker 4: me not to that Amber would come tell me what

452
00:19:51,520 --> 00:19:53,880
Speaker 4: was going on on her own. Well, she never did.

453
00:19:54,040 --> 00:19:57,160
Speaker 4: With each passing day, she got more and more unbearable

454
00:19:57,200 --> 00:20:00,600
Speaker 4: to be around. She got meaner and meaner, even publicly

455
00:20:00,640 --> 00:20:03,120
Speaker 4: accusing me of forcing our mom to do our laundry

456
00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:05,640
Speaker 4: when I was just asking how the machine worked. Out

457
00:20:05,640 --> 00:20:07,680
Speaker 4: of the seven day cruise, my husband and I only

458
00:20:07,680 --> 00:20:11,400
Speaker 4: got eight hours together alone to enjoy our honeymoon. Everything

459
00:20:11,480 --> 00:20:14,280
Speaker 4: else was either spent with someone with the family, mostly

460
00:20:14,320 --> 00:20:17,680
Speaker 4: catering to Cassie or Amber going on group excursions, which

461
00:20:17,720 --> 00:20:19,800
Speaker 4: most of them were fun, and wandering the ship with

462
00:20:19,840 --> 00:20:22,879
Speaker 4: family again. I love my family, but I will never

463
00:20:23,280 --> 00:20:26,639
Speaker 4: ever travel with my sister again. I've never ever treated

464
00:20:26,640 --> 00:20:29,159
Speaker 4: her the way she treated me. I honestly felt like

465
00:20:29,200 --> 00:20:31,359
Speaker 4: she hated me. After the cruise, I sent her a

466
00:20:31,440 --> 00:20:34,040
Speaker 4: letter explaining how hurt I was, how I felt like

467
00:20:34,080 --> 00:20:37,160
Speaker 4: her own personal gopher and punching bag, how I felt

468
00:20:37,160 --> 00:20:40,560
Speaker 4: so disrespected and used. She in turn wrote me a

469
00:20:40,600 --> 00:20:44,480
Speaker 4: novel explaining her finances, my mother's finances, enlisting the many

470
00:20:44,520 --> 00:20:46,520
Speaker 4: reasons why she was acting the way she was acting

471
00:20:46,600 --> 00:20:48,600
Speaker 4: to try and excuse her behavior.

472
00:20:48,640 --> 00:20:49,040
Speaker 1: Towards me.

473
00:20:49,119 --> 00:20:51,640
Speaker 4: She then wrote an apology, or at least my mom,

474
00:20:51,760 --> 00:20:53,680
Speaker 4: who read the letters, said it was a good apology

475
00:20:53,720 --> 00:20:56,040
Speaker 4: and to drop the situation and move on. This is

476
00:20:56,080 --> 00:20:59,359
Speaker 4: a copy paste from her apology. I'm not trying to

477
00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:02,480
Speaker 4: pretend I'm saint here. I should have realized how frustrated

478
00:21:02,520 --> 00:21:04,119
Speaker 4: I was getting and asked you guys, why you were

479
00:21:04,119 --> 00:21:06,679
Speaker 4: making things so hard, And instead I assumed that you

480
00:21:06,720 --> 00:21:09,440
Speaker 4: were being difficult for no reason and let my frustration

481
00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:12,480
Speaker 4: build until my fuse turned into a switch. I lost

482
00:21:12,520 --> 00:21:14,359
Speaker 4: my cool a lot, and I know how I get

483
00:21:14,400 --> 00:21:17,240
Speaker 4: when that happens. It's not nice at all, and I'm

484
00:21:17,320 --> 00:21:20,119
Speaker 4: genuinely sorry for that. Then directly followed by this, In

485
00:21:20,119 --> 00:21:21,920
Speaker 4: a hindsight, I also should have been a lot more

486
00:21:21,920 --> 00:21:24,400
Speaker 4: explicit that the whole SPA thing was about Mom getting

487
00:21:24,440 --> 00:21:27,119
Speaker 4: a break, not me wanting to monopolize her time, instead

488
00:21:27,119 --> 00:21:29,119
Speaker 4: of assuming you would realize that on your own, and

489
00:21:29,160 --> 00:21:31,119
Speaker 4: I could have made up a little calendar or something

490
00:21:31,160 --> 00:21:32,880
Speaker 4: so we could all get on the same page about

491
00:21:32,920 --> 00:21:35,680
Speaker 4: when it would happen, assuming you were willing, rather than

492
00:21:35,720 --> 00:21:37,480
Speaker 4: hoping you'd be able to figure it out without me

493
00:21:37,560 --> 00:21:40,320
Speaker 4: having to pester you every day. Oh, my gosh, if

494
00:21:40,320 --> 00:21:41,960
Speaker 4: nothing else, that would have given the two of you

495
00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:44,159
Speaker 4: a chance to let me know that this never was

496
00:21:44,200 --> 00:21:46,359
Speaker 4: the family cruise to you, and that there was no

497
00:21:46,480 --> 00:21:48,159
Speaker 4: way you were going to give up an hour of

498
00:21:48,200 --> 00:21:50,720
Speaker 4: your honeymoon every day, even as a thank you to

499
00:21:50,800 --> 00:21:52,840
Speaker 4: Mom for paying for the whole thing. And then I

500
00:21:52,840 --> 00:21:54,720
Speaker 4: could have figured out a plan B that wouldn't have

501
00:21:54,800 --> 00:21:57,280
Speaker 4: required a single thing from either of you. That's not

502
00:21:57,480 --> 00:22:00,119
Speaker 4: an apology. Yeah, that was a really bad apology.

503
00:22:00,359 --> 00:22:02,800
Speaker 3: It was like the apology was like at first and

504
00:22:02,840 --> 00:22:06,000
Speaker 3: then it could have stopped there. Yet did you have

505
00:22:06,560 --> 00:22:09,480
Speaker 3: like a backhanded Yeah? She was like, I can't believe

506
00:22:09,720 --> 00:22:12,720
Speaker 3: like you would take advantage of Mom, and I should

507
00:22:12,720 --> 00:22:13,560
Speaker 3: have known that you were.

508
00:22:13,440 --> 00:22:16,400
Speaker 4: Too stupid to get anything like Scott an apology. You're

509
00:22:16,440 --> 00:22:20,119
Speaker 4: just insulting your brother exactly. Yeah. Again, I love my sister,

510
00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:23,400
Speaker 4: I love my family, but the reactions have been terrible.

511
00:22:23,520 --> 00:22:26,320
Speaker 4: My mom is pretty much sided with my sister radio

512
00:22:26,440 --> 00:22:29,359
Speaker 4: silent to my husband. They used to talk every day,

513
00:22:29,480 --> 00:22:32,359
Speaker 4: saying I crushed Amber by calling her out. If it

514
00:22:32,400 --> 00:22:35,360
Speaker 4: was my intention to hurt Amber, I succeeded, even though

515
00:22:35,400 --> 00:22:37,560
Speaker 4: she told me she agreed Amber was in the wrong.

516
00:22:37,760 --> 00:22:39,440
Speaker 4: I should have just let it go, that she doesn't

517
00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:42,960
Speaker 4: want to pass away knowing I broke the family dig

518
00:22:43,280 --> 00:22:45,239
Speaker 4: My brother wants nothing to do with it and has

519
00:22:45,320 --> 00:22:49,480
Speaker 4: dropped communication except one conversation, also taking her aside, saying

520
00:22:49,520 --> 00:22:52,280
Speaker 4: her silence was better than me raising a stink, saying

521
00:22:52,320 --> 00:22:54,560
Speaker 4: he would hate to have his health fail and have

522
00:22:54,760 --> 00:22:57,680
Speaker 4: him pass away, knowing the family was in shambles. What

523
00:22:58,160 --> 00:23:02,560
Speaker 4: where did they both do that they're passing away? Passing away?

524
00:23:02,640 --> 00:23:05,359
Speaker 4: He's like, I would hate to pass away knowing everything

525
00:23:05,480 --> 00:23:09,560
Speaker 4: You've ruined, freaking everything right. Her partner tim silence Amber

526
00:23:09,640 --> 00:23:13,160
Speaker 4: completely silence after issuing me an ultimatum. Unless I can

527
00:23:13,160 --> 00:23:16,560
Speaker 4: prove to her that I'm not a selfish, ungrateful, gaslighting liar,

528
00:23:16,880 --> 00:23:20,399
Speaker 4: then she's done with our relationship. Preferred outcome to have

529
00:23:20,520 --> 00:23:23,680
Speaker 4: my family back, realistic outcome. Maybe I can get them

530
00:23:23,720 --> 00:23:26,119
Speaker 4: to agree to family counseling to repair what little is

531
00:23:26,200 --> 00:23:29,200
Speaker 4: left of our relationship. But in all honesty, it looks

532
00:23:29,440 --> 00:23:32,719
Speaker 4: pretty grimm. But you know what never looks grim Listening

533
00:23:32,800 --> 00:23:36,040
Speaker 4: to full episodes of stories like this. Just go to Spotify,

534
00:23:36,200 --> 00:23:39,000
Speaker 4: Apple Podcasts, or your favorite podcast app and search. Okay,

535
00:23:39,000 --> 00:23:41,680
Speaker 4: start time, just search it and there is a little

536
00:23:41,680 --> 00:23:43,440
Speaker 4: bit left to this story, But do you have any

537
00:23:43,480 --> 00:23:44,119
Speaker 4: final thoughts?

538
00:23:44,240 --> 00:23:44,440
Speaker 1: Dude?

539
00:23:44,520 --> 00:23:47,359
Speaker 3: I just feel like we got hit with like brand

540
00:23:47,440 --> 00:23:49,600
Speaker 3: new information. Like I feel like I don't know like.

541
00:23:49,720 --> 00:23:52,679
Speaker 4: What's going on anymore, you know. I'm like they're all

542
00:23:52,680 --> 00:23:55,959
Speaker 4: blaming Ope for like the mom literally said, hey, this

543
00:23:56,040 --> 00:23:58,840
Speaker 4: is your honeymoon, don't worry about us, and then everyone

544
00:23:58,960 --> 00:24:01,359
Speaker 4: was like, you're not helping all, and Hope's like, I

545
00:24:01,400 --> 00:24:04,679
Speaker 4: don't know what's going right? Right? What's mean to me?

546
00:24:04,960 --> 00:24:08,199
Speaker 3: This is like, yeah, I don't I don't understand. But

547
00:24:08,240 --> 00:24:10,440
Speaker 3: there's a little bit more to this story.

548
00:24:10,520 --> 00:24:13,080
Speaker 4: Let's do it. I don't want to sound dramatic, but

549
00:24:13,160 --> 00:24:16,000
Speaker 4: my heart literally hurts every day. I wanted to give

550
00:24:16,040 --> 00:24:18,760
Speaker 4: my husband an actual family that would love him for him.

551
00:24:19,040 --> 00:24:21,240
Speaker 4: I felt with all my heart it would be my family,

552
00:24:21,320 --> 00:24:23,960
Speaker 4: but they all prove that's not going to happen. Dropping

553
00:24:24,000 --> 00:24:26,800
Speaker 4: it and forgiving her mistreatment would only result in me

554
00:24:26,880 --> 00:24:29,439
Speaker 4: resenting my family. I don't want to lose them, but

555
00:24:29,520 --> 00:24:32,639
Speaker 4: feel so abused by them. I'm lost. I don't know

556
00:24:32,640 --> 00:24:34,879
Speaker 4: what to do. So am I the ale for asking

557
00:24:34,920 --> 00:24:37,760
Speaker 4: my sister for a proper apology or is it even

558
00:24:37,840 --> 00:24:40,240
Speaker 4: worth it at this point. I honestly would take any

559
00:24:40,280 --> 00:24:42,480
Speaker 4: advice because both my husband and I are at a

560
00:24:42,600 --> 00:24:44,840
Speaker 4: total loss. Thank you, And that is the end of

561
00:24:44,840 --> 00:24:47,880
Speaker 4: that story. Wow, man, oh man, what do you do?

562
00:24:48,119 --> 00:24:50,520
Speaker 3: I feel like maybe they just need some time apart,

563
00:24:50,640 --> 00:24:52,560
Speaker 3: yeah for a second, like you know, before you get

564
00:24:52,600 --> 00:24:55,240
Speaker 3: an apology, before they I don't know if they want

565
00:24:55,280 --> 00:24:58,640
Speaker 3: an apology, but like before things are like actually resolved,

566
00:24:58,760 --> 00:25:01,439
Speaker 3: maybe just take a step back, yeah, and then maybe

567
00:25:01,480 --> 00:25:03,359
Speaker 3: things will just kind of resolve themselves.

568
00:25:03,440 --> 00:25:05,800
Speaker 4: But that is the end of that story, woo. But

569
00:25:05,920 --> 00:25:08,560
Speaker 4: not the end of this episode, so we'll see you

570
00:25:08,600 --> 00:25:09,320
Speaker 4: for the next one.

571
00:25:09,440 --> 00:25:12,800
Speaker 3: I demanded my sister sign a contract when she asks

572
00:25:12,840 --> 00:25:15,600
Speaker 3: for a loan, and my family is furious.

573
00:25:16,240 --> 00:25:19,240
Speaker 4: If you gotta do business, do it properly exactly.

574
00:25:19,280 --> 00:25:22,360
Speaker 3: It's not personal, all right. This is a throwaway account.

575
00:25:22,680 --> 00:25:26,160
Speaker 3: I forty two, female, have a successful career, and inherited

576
00:25:26,200 --> 00:25:28,560
Speaker 3: a decent amount of money from my late husband. I'm

577
00:25:28,680 --> 00:25:31,159
Speaker 3: nowhere close to being a millionaire, but it's enough so

578
00:25:31,200 --> 00:25:33,320
Speaker 3: that as as long as I'm smart with the money

579
00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:35,840
Speaker 3: to only work because I want to by the time

580
00:25:35,880 --> 00:25:38,879
Speaker 3: I hit forty five. That's including any college expenses my

581
00:25:38,920 --> 00:25:41,000
Speaker 3: two children may have In the future, so long as

582
00:25:41,040 --> 00:25:43,000
Speaker 3: they go to a state college. By the way, this

583
00:25:43,119 --> 00:25:45,840
Speaker 3: comes from Business Cautious fifty three to ninety two on

584
00:25:45,880 --> 00:25:48,760
Speaker 3: the r slash. Okay, story time is subbredded. Family knows

585
00:25:48,800 --> 00:25:50,960
Speaker 3: that I have money, and while I don't mind giving

586
00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:53,160
Speaker 3: a couple hundred dollars here and there, because I know

587
00:25:53,280 --> 00:25:55,760
Speaker 3: I most likely won't get it back, I draw the

588
00:25:55,800 --> 00:25:57,879
Speaker 3: line at anything four hundred dollars plus.

589
00:25:58,040 --> 00:26:00,240
Speaker 4: They know this, but that still doesn't stop.

590
00:26:00,160 --> 00:26:02,959
Speaker 3: Them from trying, and I've always stayed firm on this.

591
00:26:03,160 --> 00:26:03,360
Speaker 4: Well.

592
00:26:03,359 --> 00:26:06,200
Speaker 3: Once the pandemic hit, my brother in law, thirty five male,

593
00:26:06,320 --> 00:26:09,640
Speaker 3: lost his job, and my sister's thirty seven female job

594
00:26:09,720 --> 00:26:13,120
Speaker 3: have reduced her hours until further notice. Two weeks ago,

595
00:26:13,240 --> 00:26:15,280
Speaker 3: I got a call from my mother asking if I

596
00:26:15,320 --> 00:26:17,080
Speaker 3: could come over. I had no problem with this and

597
00:26:17,119 --> 00:26:19,800
Speaker 3: swung by the next day and found my sister already there,

598
00:26:19,880 --> 00:26:22,480
Speaker 3: and I could tell she had been crying. Based on

599
00:26:22,480 --> 00:26:24,879
Speaker 3: the title, you all know where this is going, so

600
00:26:25,000 --> 00:26:27,399
Speaker 3: with me, her and both our parents there, my sister

601
00:26:27,440 --> 00:26:29,760
Speaker 3: informed me that even though her job was expected to

602
00:26:29,760 --> 00:26:32,480
Speaker 3: go back to regular work hours in early twenty twenty one,

603
00:26:32,600 --> 00:26:35,600
Speaker 3: there was a rumor that they would also be downsizing

604
00:26:36,160 --> 00:26:38,840
Speaker 3: she wasn't sure if her job would be secure, and

605
00:26:38,920 --> 00:26:41,800
Speaker 3: brother in law still hasn't found any luck in getting

606
00:26:41,800 --> 00:26:43,879
Speaker 3: a new job yet. I knew what they wanted and

607
00:26:43,960 --> 00:26:47,000
Speaker 3: tried to play dumb at first and offered to help

608
00:26:47,040 --> 00:26:49,399
Speaker 3: find my brother in law and my sister jops. My

609
00:26:49,520 --> 00:26:51,959
Speaker 3: sister said that that was very generous of me and

610
00:26:52,000 --> 00:26:54,560
Speaker 3: she would take the offer, but in the meantime, what

611
00:26:54,600 --> 00:26:57,399
Speaker 3: they really needed was alone. My sister asked for at

612
00:26:57,480 --> 00:27:00,760
Speaker 3: least forty thousand dollars to help with ping off their

613
00:27:00,800 --> 00:27:04,040
Speaker 3: credit card, manage the mortgage, and make payments.

614
00:27:04,160 --> 00:27:09,720
Speaker 4: That's a huge loan. That's huge. That's a huge go

615
00:27:09,800 --> 00:27:10,440
Speaker 4: to the bank.

616
00:27:10,680 --> 00:27:13,439
Speaker 3: They wanted this to make payments towards their student loans

617
00:27:13,440 --> 00:27:16,160
Speaker 3: again and still have some money left over in case

618
00:27:16,200 --> 00:27:18,000
Speaker 3: the worst happened. I was quick to tell them that

619
00:27:18,040 --> 00:27:20,320
Speaker 3: they were asking a lot from me, that while I

620
00:27:20,359 --> 00:27:22,919
Speaker 3: did have some money, I didn't just have forty thousand

621
00:27:22,920 --> 00:27:25,280
Speaker 3: dollars laying around to give out on a whim. I

622
00:27:25,359 --> 00:27:27,439
Speaker 3: told them that I'd have to check my finances and

623
00:27:27,520 --> 00:27:30,320
Speaker 3: think about it. After two days, I started getting inquiring

624
00:27:30,400 --> 00:27:32,560
Speaker 3: texts from my parents and sister and told them that

625
00:27:32,600 --> 00:27:34,480
Speaker 3: I was busy this week and that i'd let them

626
00:27:34,520 --> 00:27:36,680
Speaker 3: know over the weekend. I checked the numbers and it

627
00:27:36,840 --> 00:27:39,720
Speaker 3: was cutting it a little close, but it was doable. However,

628
00:27:39,880 --> 00:27:42,199
Speaker 3: I still didn't like the idea of just giving the

629
00:27:42,240 --> 00:27:45,000
Speaker 3: money away without any reassurances that I'd get it back.

630
00:27:45,080 --> 00:27:47,000
Speaker 3: I drew up a rough draft of a contract and

631
00:27:47,040 --> 00:27:49,240
Speaker 3: emailed it to my sister, stating that I was willing

632
00:27:49,240 --> 00:27:51,680
Speaker 3: to give her money after she signed the final draft,

633
00:27:51,760 --> 00:27:53,439
Speaker 3: and that the money would have to be given in

634
00:27:53,520 --> 00:27:54,920
Speaker 3: three separate installments.

635
00:27:55,040 --> 00:27:58,000
Speaker 4: I think that's incredibly fair. Yeah, that amount of money,

636
00:27:58,080 --> 00:28:02,840
Speaker 4: that's forty thousand dollars. Yeah, that is very fair to say, hey,

637
00:28:02,880 --> 00:28:03,640
Speaker 4: I want a contract.

638
00:28:03,760 --> 00:28:07,439
Speaker 3: Yeah, because that's always like when things go wrong, like

639
00:28:07,520 --> 00:28:09,520
Speaker 3: with friendships and family and stuff like that, is when

640
00:28:09,560 --> 00:28:12,760
Speaker 3: like money like that, it's involved and there's no guarantee

641
00:28:12,760 --> 00:28:15,160
Speaker 3: that you'll get that back exactly, because there's a lot

642
00:28:15,240 --> 00:28:17,400
Speaker 3: of stories, a lot of situations where people don't.

643
00:28:17,200 --> 00:28:19,720
Speaker 4: Get that back, and then it obviously causes problems.

644
00:28:19,640 --> 00:28:22,720
Speaker 3: Especially when it's forty thousand dollars dollars is.

645
00:28:22,640 --> 00:28:23,879
Speaker 4: So much, so much.

646
00:28:24,040 --> 00:28:26,920
Speaker 3: My family was furious and said that as the older sister,

647
00:28:27,040 --> 00:28:28,960
Speaker 3: it was my duty to look out for my sister

648
00:28:29,040 --> 00:28:31,320
Speaker 3: in her time of need, and to make her sign

649
00:28:31,320 --> 00:28:32,840
Speaker 3: a contract was offensive.

650
00:28:32,960 --> 00:28:35,679
Speaker 4: Well, as the parents, maybe it's your responsibility to take

651
00:28:35,720 --> 00:28:37,480
Speaker 4: care of your kids. Yeah, you give her the money.

652
00:28:37,560 --> 00:28:39,320
Speaker 4: Look at that. I've countered with that.

653
00:28:39,360 --> 00:28:41,640
Speaker 3: Since my sister has never paid me back whenever I

654
00:28:41,720 --> 00:28:44,120
Speaker 3: loaned her money since the day I married my husband.

655
00:28:44,240 --> 00:28:46,240
Speaker 3: I think that this was more than fair.

656
00:28:46,400 --> 00:28:47,320
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's huge.

657
00:28:47,400 --> 00:28:50,000
Speaker 3: Everyone is still angry with me, So I just wanted

658
00:28:50,080 --> 00:28:51,480
Speaker 3: a more neutral perspective.

659
00:28:51,800 --> 00:28:54,280
Speaker 4: Am I the a hole? And there is a quick edit?

660
00:28:54,400 --> 00:28:56,920
Speaker 4: What do we think? Is ope? The a hole? No?

661
00:28:56,920 --> 00:29:00,600
Speaker 3: No, that's so much, so much money, much money.

662
00:29:00,680 --> 00:29:02,760
Speaker 4: Yeah, I could see. I could even see you like

663
00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:05,120
Speaker 4: having a contract for like two k.

664
00:29:05,400 --> 00:29:08,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, Like I'm saying, she's had a cap at four

665
00:29:08,120 --> 00:29:10,960
Speaker 3: hundred dollars. Yeah, and there's been like, you know, hundreds

666
00:29:11,000 --> 00:29:13,560
Speaker 3: here and there, and she's never gotten any of that

667
00:29:13,680 --> 00:29:16,600
Speaker 3: money back. And she's literally had a cap on four

668
00:29:16,640 --> 00:29:18,840
Speaker 3: hundred dollars. Like we let's look at that for a second.

669
00:29:18,880 --> 00:29:21,040
Speaker 3: And they've I think, had problems with that or like

670
00:29:21,240 --> 00:29:24,320
Speaker 3: insisted on more in the past, but OP was like, no,

671
00:29:24,680 --> 00:29:27,080
Speaker 3: four hundreds the limit, and they were like, okay, well,

672
00:29:27,160 --> 00:29:31,240
Speaker 3: let's add like another zero or yea more zeros to that.

673
00:29:31,320 --> 00:29:33,800
Speaker 4: Let's actually bump that number. Yeah wow.

674
00:29:33,920 --> 00:29:35,720
Speaker 3: I stepped away for a bit, and I wanted to

675
00:29:35,760 --> 00:29:38,440
Speaker 3: say thanks for the support. Also, I keep seeing a

676
00:29:38,440 --> 00:29:40,520
Speaker 3: few of the same questions pop up, so I'm going

677
00:29:40,560 --> 00:29:42,760
Speaker 3: to clarify and mention a couple of things. My sister

678
00:29:42,800 --> 00:29:44,640
Speaker 3: and her husband can't get a loan from the bank,

679
00:29:44,800 --> 00:29:47,360
Speaker 3: or at least not much, because their credit isn't the

680
00:29:47,360 --> 00:29:49,840
Speaker 3: best right now. To my sister and brother in law's credit,

681
00:29:49,920 --> 00:29:52,240
Speaker 3: they did have some savings but are burning through it

682
00:29:52,280 --> 00:29:54,200
Speaker 3: since my brother in law is currently out of work

683
00:29:54,280 --> 00:29:56,640
Speaker 3: and my sister doesn't work enough hours right now.

684
00:29:56,840 --> 00:29:58,040
Speaker 4: Also, they have kids.

685
00:29:58,160 --> 00:30:00,880
Speaker 3: After I got married, my sisters started making little jokes

686
00:30:00,880 --> 00:30:03,360
Speaker 3: that compared to what my husband makes, what's a few

687
00:30:03,480 --> 00:30:07,240
Speaker 3: couple dollars to family every now and then. Over years,

688
00:30:07,400 --> 00:30:10,560
Speaker 3: I gave my sister at least two five hundred dollars

689
00:30:10,600 --> 00:30:13,200
Speaker 3: as she never paid back, and I just stopped counting

690
00:30:13,240 --> 00:30:15,480
Speaker 3: after a while because it would get me upset. I

691
00:30:15,600 --> 00:30:18,000
Speaker 3: just made it a habit to stop giving her money,

692
00:30:18,080 --> 00:30:20,560
Speaker 3: although I would still pay whenever we went out to restaurants,

693
00:30:20,760 --> 00:30:23,920
Speaker 3: the movies, or the spot. That's so nice that's very

694
00:30:23,960 --> 00:30:24,760
Speaker 3: considerate too.

695
00:30:25,040 --> 00:30:25,280
Speaker 4: Yeah.

696
00:30:25,400 --> 00:30:27,880
Speaker 3: I edit number two Okay, had to step away again

697
00:30:28,000 --> 00:30:30,600
Speaker 3: for personal stuff, and when I checked, I saw even

698
00:30:30,640 --> 00:30:33,640
Speaker 3: more responses, all talking about how I would collect my

699
00:30:33,720 --> 00:30:34,440
Speaker 3: money if my.

700
00:30:34,440 --> 00:30:36,680
Speaker 4: Sister either refused or couldn't pay me back.

701
00:30:36,720 --> 00:30:38,520
Speaker 3: I left that part out because I wanted to focus

702
00:30:38,560 --> 00:30:40,959
Speaker 3: on just the idea of the contract itself rather than

703
00:30:41,000 --> 00:30:44,920
Speaker 3: the technicality part. As previously stated, I emailed my sister

704
00:30:45,000 --> 00:30:47,480
Speaker 3: a rough draft of the contract and was planning on

705
00:30:47,520 --> 00:30:50,960
Speaker 3: having it notarized so that it was official, but as collateral,

706
00:30:51,040 --> 00:30:52,800
Speaker 3: I would take ownership of her and my brother in

707
00:30:52,880 --> 00:30:55,680
Speaker 3: law's cars if they couldn't pay. Hope that that clears

708
00:30:55,720 --> 00:30:56,600
Speaker 3: a few things up.

709
00:30:56,720 --> 00:30:57,960
Speaker 4: But there is an.

710
00:30:57,880 --> 00:31:00,640
Speaker 3: Update, so let's get into that. Yeah, thanks to all

711
00:31:00,680 --> 00:31:02,240
Speaker 3: the wonderful and helpful comments.

712
00:31:02,280 --> 00:31:02,960
Speaker 4: I won't lie.

713
00:31:03,120 --> 00:31:05,560
Speaker 3: Familial pressure and guilt was getting to me a little

714
00:31:05,680 --> 00:31:08,440
Speaker 3: because I realize how fortunate I am. I also wanted

715
00:31:08,440 --> 00:31:12,320
Speaker 3: to apologize for downplaying my socioeconomic status. I just have

716
00:31:12,440 --> 00:31:14,920
Speaker 3: been living beneath my means for so long I sometimes

717
00:31:14,960 --> 00:31:17,440
Speaker 3: forget how fortunate I truly am. I just wanted to

718
00:31:17,480 --> 00:31:20,440
Speaker 3: show my children the importance of being financially responsible and.

719
00:31:20,480 --> 00:31:21,800
Speaker 4: Rarely ever splurged.

720
00:31:21,920 --> 00:31:24,120
Speaker 3: In the end, I contacted my sister and brother in

721
00:31:24,200 --> 00:31:26,360
Speaker 3: law for a sit down, public so that they couldn't

722
00:31:26,360 --> 00:31:28,240
Speaker 3: cause too much of a scene, but private enough so

723
00:31:28,280 --> 00:31:31,160
Speaker 3: that we could vaguely discuss sensitive information. Plus there was

724
00:31:31,400 --> 00:31:34,720
Speaker 3: the social distancing. I simply did a basic laydown of

725
00:31:34,720 --> 00:31:37,040
Speaker 3: the situation. I told them that I needed them to

726
00:31:37,120 --> 00:31:39,320
Speaker 3: hear everything I had to say first, and if they

727
00:31:39,360 --> 00:31:42,080
Speaker 3: interrupted me, I would walk away and not lend them

728
00:31:42,120 --> 00:31:42,480
Speaker 3: a cent.

729
00:31:42,640 --> 00:31:42,920
Speaker 4: First.

730
00:31:42,960 --> 00:31:44,800
Speaker 3: I told them that it is good to help family

731
00:31:44,800 --> 00:31:47,800
Speaker 3: when you can, but couldn't give them forty thousand dollars.

732
00:31:47,920 --> 00:31:50,920
Speaker 3: I am able to offer them three thousand, two hundred

733
00:31:50,920 --> 00:31:52,600
Speaker 3: a month for at least six months.

734
00:31:52,720 --> 00:31:55,480
Speaker 4: I think that is a much better move. Yeah, because

735
00:31:55,480 --> 00:31:57,840
Speaker 4: it's still giving them enough where you know, once a

736
00:31:57,840 --> 00:32:02,040
Speaker 4: month they pay off whatever they need to pay off. Yeah,

737
00:32:02,040 --> 00:32:04,800
Speaker 4: it could just blow through it all exactly. They blow

738
00:32:04,840 --> 00:32:07,680
Speaker 4: through the forty thousand and ask them, Yeah, so this way,

739
00:32:07,680 --> 00:32:09,160
Speaker 4: it's like you can control it a little bit more

740
00:32:09,200 --> 00:32:10,960
Speaker 4: and then maybe they get back on their feet earlier,

741
00:32:11,000 --> 00:32:12,840
Speaker 4: and then you don't need to keep paying. That's that's

742
00:32:12,840 --> 00:32:13,400
Speaker 4: super true.

743
00:32:13,440 --> 00:32:16,040
Speaker 3: I told them that I simply can't afford anymore without

744
00:32:16,080 --> 00:32:18,320
Speaker 3: it affecting my kids, and that I am a mother

745
00:32:18,440 --> 00:32:20,480
Speaker 3: before I am a sister or a daughter. I also

746
00:32:20,520 --> 00:32:22,480
Speaker 3: told them that I can't afford to bail them out

747
00:32:22,520 --> 00:32:24,600
Speaker 3: every time that they're in trouble, and that since the

748
00:32:24,640 --> 00:32:27,040
Speaker 3: future is so uncertain, I may not always have the

749
00:32:27,120 --> 00:32:29,160
Speaker 3: means to care for others. My money is going to

750
00:32:29,200 --> 00:32:31,160
Speaker 3: have strings attached, and if they.

751
00:32:31,000 --> 00:32:32,920
Speaker 4: Didn't like it, they could go somewhere else.

752
00:32:33,120 --> 00:32:34,880
Speaker 3: I made it clear that I wasn't doing this to

753
00:32:34,920 --> 00:32:36,880
Speaker 3: be mean or controlling, but I want to help my

754
00:32:36,920 --> 00:32:39,800
Speaker 3: sister help herself. The rules were a The money would

755
00:32:39,800 --> 00:32:43,000
Speaker 3: be deposited into a new joint bank account with one

756
00:32:43,120 --> 00:32:45,800
Speaker 3: authorized signer be My sister and brother in law were

757
00:32:45,840 --> 00:32:48,160
Speaker 3: going to meet with the financial advisor, which I would

758
00:32:48,200 --> 00:32:48,560
Speaker 3: pay for.

759
00:32:48,640 --> 00:32:51,360
Speaker 4: It's so considered. That's so nice.

760
00:32:51,480 --> 00:32:54,240
Speaker 3: See, since neither of them are working, it doesn't make

761
00:32:54,280 --> 00:32:56,560
Speaker 3: sense to have two cars, so I expect them to

762
00:32:56,600 --> 00:32:58,840
Speaker 3: sell one of them, and then our parents can let

763
00:32:58,880 --> 00:33:01,480
Speaker 3: my sister or brother law use one of their cars

764
00:33:01,520 --> 00:33:03,720
Speaker 3: when they needed it. D Before they can get the

765
00:33:03,720 --> 00:33:06,280
Speaker 3: first payment, they will be having their meeting with the

766
00:33:06,280 --> 00:33:08,800
Speaker 3: financial adviser, and I will be in the meeting just

767
00:33:08,960 --> 00:33:11,520
Speaker 3: so I know that they went. I made it very

768
00:33:11,520 --> 00:33:14,000
Speaker 3: clear that this is the best that I could give them.

769
00:33:14,120 --> 00:33:16,960
Speaker 3: They looked upset, but I told them that beggars can't

770
00:33:16,960 --> 00:33:17,600
Speaker 3: be choosers.

771
00:33:17,680 --> 00:33:19,400
Speaker 4: They said they'd think about it.

772
00:33:19,480 --> 00:33:21,240
Speaker 3: I knew that my sister was going to cry to

773
00:33:21,280 --> 00:33:22,880
Speaker 3: our parents, so I called them as soon as I

774
00:33:22,880 --> 00:33:24,480
Speaker 3: got in the car and told them everything.

775
00:33:24,600 --> 00:33:24,960
Speaker 4: I said.

776
00:33:25,040 --> 00:33:27,120
Speaker 3: I'm not changing my mind and that if they feel

777
00:33:27,200 --> 00:33:29,480
Speaker 3: my sister needs more than what I'm offering, they're more

778
00:33:29,520 --> 00:33:31,920
Speaker 3: than happy to downsize and sell their own home or

779
00:33:32,000 --> 00:33:35,680
Speaker 3: take out money from their own retirement and SSI since

780
00:33:35,760 --> 00:33:38,440
Speaker 3: family helps family. If there's an update, I'll put it

781
00:33:38,480 --> 00:33:41,680
Speaker 3: here as an edit, and there's an edit for info.

782
00:33:41,960 --> 00:33:44,280
Speaker 3: I keep seeing this just so we're clear. The thirty

783
00:33:44,280 --> 00:33:46,080
Speaker 3: two hundred a month is going to be a gift,

784
00:33:46,120 --> 00:33:48,080
Speaker 3: and I told them that I don't expect to ever

785
00:33:48,120 --> 00:33:52,240
Speaker 3: see that money again. WHOA, but I am never going

786
00:33:52,280 --> 00:33:54,520
Speaker 3: to give my sister and brother in law another cent

787
00:33:54,760 --> 00:33:57,600
Speaker 3: after this, and I'm prepared to go low contact no

788
00:33:57,760 --> 00:34:00,320
Speaker 3: contact with her over this. I know my parents will

789
00:34:00,320 --> 00:34:02,720
Speaker 3: never go low contact or no contact with me, because

790
00:34:02,720 --> 00:34:04,520
Speaker 3: I'm their first choice when it comes to taking care

791
00:34:04,560 --> 00:34:06,560
Speaker 3: of them when they get too old to take care

792
00:34:06,600 --> 00:34:10,040
Speaker 3: of themselves, by the way, will always take care of you.

793
00:34:10,040 --> 00:34:13,000
Speaker 3: You can listen to full episodes of stories just like this.

794
00:34:13,200 --> 00:34:16,400
Speaker 3: Just go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or your favorite podcast

795
00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:18,680
Speaker 3: app and search Okay.

796
00:34:18,480 --> 00:34:20,640
Speaker 4: Story time, just search it out. We'll be there for

797
00:34:20,760 --> 00:34:23,000
Speaker 4: it right there. Edit for info number two.

798
00:34:23,120 --> 00:34:25,000
Speaker 3: I forgot to mention that I don't really want the

799
00:34:25,160 --> 00:34:26,640
Speaker 3: sister and the brother in law to sell one.

800
00:34:26,600 --> 00:34:28,719
Speaker 4: Of the cars, Okay, okay, okay, which is the only

801
00:34:28,760 --> 00:34:29,080
Speaker 4: thing that I.

802
00:34:30,680 --> 00:34:33,360
Speaker 3: Like. It's just my way of putting pressure on the

803
00:34:33,400 --> 00:34:35,920
Speaker 3: brother in law to get a job, any job. He

804
00:34:36,040 --> 00:34:38,600
Speaker 3: has the masters and was making I think around seventy

805
00:34:38,640 --> 00:34:41,319
Speaker 3: five thousand at minimum, and now he wants a job

806
00:34:41,320 --> 00:34:43,319
Speaker 3: in the same field making the same amount or more.

807
00:34:43,360 --> 00:34:45,359
Speaker 3: If we weren't in a pandemic and he didn't have

808
00:34:45,400 --> 00:34:47,759
Speaker 3: so much debt, i'd understand him wanting to hold out

809
00:34:47,760 --> 00:34:50,319
Speaker 3: for something better. But right now, you gotta do what

810
00:34:50,400 --> 00:34:52,760
Speaker 3: you gotta do. And that's the end of it. Actually,

811
00:34:52,880 --> 00:34:56,960
Speaker 3: literally my only qualm and OP yeah, yeah, so we're trusted.

812
00:34:57,120 --> 00:34:58,600
Speaker 4: I think you're you're in the clear, op.

813
00:34:59,000 --> 00:35:01,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, absolutely, But I do like I love that she

814
00:35:02,200 --> 00:35:04,000
Speaker 3: put like the financial advisor.

815
00:35:03,640 --> 00:35:06,360
Speaker 4: In there, so offering to pay for the financial advisors

816
00:35:06,480 --> 00:35:10,560
Speaker 4: really really kind. Yeah, no, that's that's insane, above and beyond,

817
00:35:10,840 --> 00:35:11,479
Speaker 4: and then like.

818
00:35:11,640 --> 00:35:14,360
Speaker 3: Talking about like downsizing and stuff, it's like, well, yeah,

819
00:35:14,400 --> 00:35:16,680
Speaker 3: like if it's if this is an emergency and you

820
00:35:16,719 --> 00:35:19,160
Speaker 3: don't have a job and you like are so desperate

821
00:35:19,200 --> 00:35:22,160
Speaker 3: that you need to take forty thousand dollars from someone,

822
00:35:22,239 --> 00:35:24,359
Speaker 3: It's like, then you just figure out what you can

823
00:35:24,400 --> 00:35:25,840
Speaker 3: do with your own stuff exactly.

824
00:35:25,920 --> 00:35:28,880
Speaker 4: It's like maybe, unfortunately, maybe we can't live in the

825
00:35:28,920 --> 00:35:30,879
Speaker 4: same big like if they're living in that big house,

826
00:35:30,920 --> 00:35:33,040
Speaker 4: maybe we can't live in that big house anymore, or

827
00:35:33,080 --> 00:35:35,680
Speaker 4: like maybe we're I'm just you know, guessing here, but

828
00:35:35,719 --> 00:35:38,960
Speaker 4: like maybe they were spending money on like a club

829
00:35:39,120 --> 00:35:41,640
Speaker 4: or something. Yeah, and like maybe like a country club

830
00:35:41,680 --> 00:35:43,719
Speaker 4: or subscription and stuff, like maybe you can't spend that

831
00:35:43,800 --> 00:35:46,360
Speaker 4: money where you can't go to the same grocery stores

832
00:35:46,400 --> 00:35:47,840
Speaker 4: that you're like as many clothes.

833
00:35:47,880 --> 00:35:51,160
Speaker 3: You're like, there's ways that you can cut down and yeah, lifestyle.

834
00:35:50,719 --> 00:35:52,680
Speaker 4: And maybe that doesn't get you all the way right,

835
00:35:52,719 --> 00:35:55,400
Speaker 4: but it does. It's it's I think what op is

836
00:35:55,480 --> 00:35:57,520
Speaker 4: trying to show here is like we need to be

837
00:35:57,560 --> 00:35:59,480
Speaker 4: like if you show me that you're being careful what

838
00:35:59,520 --> 00:36:01,960
Speaker 4: you're finding it. I will, yeh. But that is the

839
00:36:02,040 --> 00:36:05,040
Speaker 4: end of the story and the end of the episode. Yeah.

840
00:36:05,200 --> 00:36:07,040
Speaker 1: Hey, it's Sam, your og host. Here. We're gonna get

841
00:36:07,080 --> 00:36:08,759
Speaker 1: back to the stories. But here's three minutes of ads

842
00:36:08,760 --> 00:36:09,800
Speaker 1: from our sponsors.

843
00:36:10,160 --> 00:36:14,239
Speaker 3: My stepdaughter hates me and she's doing everything to make

844
00:36:14,320 --> 00:36:14,919
Speaker 3: me leave.

845
00:36:15,080 --> 00:36:16,760
Speaker 1: Buy her from your family.

846
00:36:17,000 --> 00:36:19,400
Speaker 3: I don't know if this fits into am I the

847
00:36:19,400 --> 00:36:22,120
Speaker 3: a whole reddit? But I need advice on what to do.

848
00:36:22,200 --> 00:36:24,680
Speaker 3: I'm thirty four female and I'm married to thirty eight male.

849
00:36:25,040 --> 00:36:26,960
Speaker 3: We've been married for less than a year, and I

850
00:36:27,000 --> 00:36:30,840
Speaker 3: really love my husband. We are generally happy in our relationship. However,

851
00:36:31,200 --> 00:36:33,839
Speaker 3: my husband has a twelve year old daughter who just.

852
00:36:33,920 --> 00:36:35,160
Speaker 4: Can't stand me.

853
00:36:35,360 --> 00:36:37,200
Speaker 3: I don't know how else to explain it, but she

854
00:36:37,280 --> 00:36:40,080
Speaker 3: wants me to leave, and she's doing everything to make

855
00:36:40,120 --> 00:36:42,640
Speaker 3: it happen. By the way, this comes from wild Bake

856
00:36:42,680 --> 00:36:45,040
Speaker 3: twenty seven to fifty four on the our slash Okay

857
00:36:45,040 --> 00:36:49,160
Speaker 3: storytime subbreddit. So Ever since we started dating and I

858
00:36:49,239 --> 00:36:52,480
Speaker 3: met his daughter, she never liked me. I thought it

859
00:36:52,600 --> 00:36:55,120
Speaker 3: was I don't know, maybe because I'm dating her dad

860
00:36:55,239 --> 00:36:58,520
Speaker 3: and she's sad her parents divorced, but it has gotten worse.

861
00:36:59,080 --> 00:36:59,440
Speaker 1: Works.

862
00:37:00,239 --> 00:37:01,520
Speaker 4: Let's find out how.

863
00:37:01,360 --> 00:37:03,840
Speaker 3: Before we got married and we weren't living together, I

864
00:37:03,960 --> 00:37:06,359
Speaker 3: wasn't around her really. I mean I did meet her

865
00:37:06,480 --> 00:37:08,719
Speaker 3: and occasionally saw her, and she was rude to me

866
00:37:08,880 --> 00:37:11,920
Speaker 3: every time. Since we moved in together, she's been spending

867
00:37:11,960 --> 00:37:14,960
Speaker 3: more time at our house than her mom's, and she's

868
00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:18,600
Speaker 3: been starting to be more rude and straight up evil.

869
00:37:19,200 --> 00:37:21,400
Speaker 3: She started being more openly rude to me, but not

870
00:37:21,480 --> 00:37:23,799
Speaker 3: around her dad. She's just rude to me when he's

871
00:37:23,840 --> 00:37:24,440
Speaker 3: not around.

872
00:37:24,440 --> 00:37:24,920
Speaker 4: Of course.

873
00:37:25,160 --> 00:37:28,480
Speaker 1: Classic it's again, you just have to like you. I

874
00:37:28,560 --> 00:37:30,720
Speaker 1: gotta be ready for it exactly. Yeah.

875
00:37:30,800 --> 00:37:32,759
Speaker 3: She wants to make it seem like I'm being mean

876
00:37:32,800 --> 00:37:35,120
Speaker 3: to her. Like, for example, I was working on a

877
00:37:35,160 --> 00:37:37,279
Speaker 3: really important paper for my job, and as I was

878
00:37:37,320 --> 00:37:40,319
Speaker 3: writing the last bit, I left my laptop on the

879
00:37:40,360 --> 00:37:43,520
Speaker 3: table and went to the toilet, and when I came back,

880
00:37:43,680 --> 00:37:45,600
Speaker 3: the whole document.

881
00:37:45,360 --> 00:37:48,640
Speaker 1: Was gone flush it away. Yeah, but I'm sure.

882
00:37:48,880 --> 00:37:52,000
Speaker 3: It was deleted from my profile on Microsoft Word and

883
00:37:52,200 --> 00:37:54,520
Speaker 3: even from my computer memory.

884
00:37:54,960 --> 00:37:55,719
Speaker 4: She went in deep.

885
00:37:55,920 --> 00:37:58,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's it's like the classic case of like, oh,

886
00:37:58,280 --> 00:37:59,520
Speaker 2: kids know how to like go in and hack.

887
00:38:00,080 --> 00:38:02,959
Speaker 1: She's like, nah, you don't even you can't even recover.

888
00:38:02,680 --> 00:38:06,440
Speaker 4: This released it from the dark web and everything.

889
00:38:06,920 --> 00:38:07,960
Speaker 1: Yeah.

890
00:38:08,000 --> 00:38:08,560
Speaker 4: Crazy.

891
00:38:08,760 --> 00:38:11,640
Speaker 3: Even the recycle bin was empty, which means someone had

892
00:38:11,640 --> 00:38:13,120
Speaker 3: to completely delete it.

893
00:38:13,360 --> 00:38:14,520
Speaker 4: Me and her were the.

894
00:38:14,360 --> 00:38:17,319
Speaker 3: Only people inside the house and her dad was outside.

895
00:38:17,400 --> 00:38:20,360
Speaker 3: I asked her, not did she do it, but why

896
00:38:20,400 --> 00:38:22,480
Speaker 3: did she do it? Because she was the only one

897
00:38:22,520 --> 00:38:25,560
Speaker 3: in the house, and she started yelling so that her

898
00:38:25,640 --> 00:38:28,480
Speaker 3: dad would hear her and come back in smart.

899
00:38:28,640 --> 00:38:30,080
Speaker 4: This girl's too smart for her own good.

900
00:38:30,600 --> 00:38:33,920
Speaker 3: She said, how I'm always accusing her of something and

901
00:38:33,960 --> 00:38:37,440
Speaker 3: straight up lied. Her dad actually told her she can't

902
00:38:37,440 --> 00:38:39,960
Speaker 3: be doing that and went back to her room. I

903
00:38:40,000 --> 00:38:42,640
Speaker 3: still lost my paper, though, that was just one of

904
00:38:42,680 --> 00:38:45,960
Speaker 3: the numerous things she did. For example, she also locked

905
00:38:45,960 --> 00:38:48,680
Speaker 3: me out on the balcony. She put my phone in water,

906
00:38:48,840 --> 00:38:52,000
Speaker 3: but it survived. She hides my stuff like my car

907
00:38:52,080 --> 00:38:54,200
Speaker 3: keys or things I bring with me when I have

908
00:38:54,280 --> 00:38:56,759
Speaker 3: to leave the house in a rush, just to make

909
00:38:56,800 --> 00:38:59,839
Speaker 3: me mad. It's absurd. Honestly, most of the things are

910
00:38:59,880 --> 00:39:02,839
Speaker 3: just plain annoying and not harmful. But the thing that

911
00:39:02,960 --> 00:39:05,960
Speaker 3: definitely made me decide to leave and divorce from her

912
00:39:06,040 --> 00:39:09,040
Speaker 3: dad is when she made coffee for him and me.

913
00:39:09,360 --> 00:39:11,800
Speaker 4: Which is not something she really does, at least not

914
00:39:11,920 --> 00:39:12,200
Speaker 4: for me.

915
00:39:12,600 --> 00:39:14,560
Speaker 3: But she made me a cup of coffee, and I

916
00:39:14,680 --> 00:39:17,920
Speaker 3: was confused why she was being so nice. Thankfully, I

917
00:39:18,080 --> 00:39:21,560
Speaker 3: jokingly thought it must be poisoned and stirred the coffee

918
00:39:21,560 --> 00:39:24,279
Speaker 3: and found a big piece of glass inside.

919
00:39:24,400 --> 00:39:26,719
Speaker 4: Oh my god, that's crazy.

920
00:39:27,040 --> 00:39:31,960
Speaker 2: That is I mean, thrower in juvie chat. Yeah, do

921
00:39:32,080 --> 00:39:33,040
Speaker 2: we lock her up for this?

922
00:39:33,280 --> 00:39:36,160
Speaker 3: That's like, that's actually so insane. I thought it was

923
00:39:36,160 --> 00:39:37,479
Speaker 3: gonna be like laxatives or something.

924
00:39:37,560 --> 00:39:41,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, but I think there's like some level of like

925
00:39:41,080 --> 00:39:43,439
Speaker 2: if it's just like oh, you know, like right, as

926
00:39:43,520 --> 00:39:47,240
Speaker 2: if like there's some level of attitude. Yeah that can

927
00:39:47,320 --> 00:39:51,280
Speaker 2: be not excused but understood. Right, But like I'm sorry,

928
00:39:51,280 --> 00:39:54,160
Speaker 2: but like you remember being like twelve, Yes, did you

929
00:39:54,200 --> 00:39:56,799
Speaker 2: ever put a giant piece of glass in someone's cup?

930
00:39:57,000 --> 00:39:57,200
Speaker 3: You know?

931
00:39:57,440 --> 00:39:58,319
Speaker 4: I don't think I did.

932
00:39:58,480 --> 00:40:01,600
Speaker 1: You did it right now? So it's like, this is crazy.

933
00:40:01,680 --> 00:40:05,520
Speaker 4: Never have I ever even like thought of making someone.

934
00:40:05,160 --> 00:40:07,880
Speaker 2: Swallow glass, Like you have to be you gotta have

935
00:40:08,040 --> 00:40:09,360
Speaker 2: some like built in evil.

936
00:40:09,520 --> 00:40:10,480
Speaker 1: You gotta have some built in.

937
00:40:10,680 --> 00:40:13,239
Speaker 3: It's like some kind of psychotic gene in there.

938
00:40:13,480 --> 00:40:14,560
Speaker 4: That's insane.

939
00:40:14,680 --> 00:40:14,960
Speaker 1: Wow.

940
00:40:15,120 --> 00:40:17,560
Speaker 3: I showed it to my husband and he was absolutely

941
00:40:17,640 --> 00:40:20,279
Speaker 3: mad and yelled at her. But I don't think that's

942
00:40:20,400 --> 00:40:22,880
Speaker 3: enough for me to stay. I don't feel safe anymore.

943
00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:25,120
Speaker 3: Like if I didn't stir that coffee, I would probably

944
00:40:25,200 --> 00:40:28,760
Speaker 3: end up cutting my throat with glass or swallowing it.

945
00:40:28,760 --> 00:40:31,400
Speaker 3: It's not just a harmless prank. It was really eft

946
00:40:31,520 --> 00:40:34,400
Speaker 3: up and serious this time. I already told my husband

947
00:40:34,480 --> 00:40:36,520
Speaker 3: I can't stay in the same house with her because

948
00:40:36,560 --> 00:40:40,080
Speaker 3: she obviously wants me gone. I simply don't want to stay.

949
00:40:40,239 --> 00:40:42,480
Speaker 3: And I know I can't make him like leave his

950
00:40:42,640 --> 00:40:47,440
Speaker 3: daughter or whatever, or can you foster or if she

951
00:40:47,480 --> 00:40:53,000
Speaker 3: winds up in jubie like I think this is the

952
00:40:53,040 --> 00:40:55,799
Speaker 3: only solution because I'm not going to risk her doing

953
00:40:55,840 --> 00:40:58,320
Speaker 3: something more and actually hurting me this time.

954
00:40:58,480 --> 00:41:00,560
Speaker 4: I'm sorry. I didn't answer to any comments.

955
00:41:00,640 --> 00:41:03,120
Speaker 3: I didn't get any notifications from Reddit, so I thought

956
00:41:03,160 --> 00:41:06,360
Speaker 3: nobody interacted with my post. Last night, I talked to

957
00:41:06,400 --> 00:41:08,640
Speaker 3: my husband and I told him that I don't want

958
00:41:08,680 --> 00:41:10,839
Speaker 3: to live in fear and be worried that she's going

959
00:41:10,880 --> 00:41:13,640
Speaker 3: to poison me next time. I was really mad and

960
00:41:13,680 --> 00:41:15,920
Speaker 3: said that she needs to be sent in an asylum

961
00:41:16,000 --> 00:41:16,839
Speaker 3: and things like that.

962
00:41:16,960 --> 00:41:20,080
Speaker 1: I mean, you're not wrong.

963
00:41:20,440 --> 00:41:22,960
Speaker 3: We argued, and while he wasn't trying to defend what

964
00:41:23,040 --> 00:41:25,560
Speaker 3: she's doing, I still think he doesn't see this as

965
00:41:25,600 --> 00:41:27,080
Speaker 3: something so insane.

966
00:41:27,320 --> 00:41:29,200
Speaker 4: I told him I want a divorce and then I'm

967
00:41:29,239 --> 00:41:30,799
Speaker 4: going to leave. We argued a.

968
00:41:30,680 --> 00:41:33,479
Speaker 3: Bit more, and today I came back earlier from work

969
00:41:33,520 --> 00:41:35,800
Speaker 3: and packed some of my things and left.

970
00:41:36,080 --> 00:41:37,000
Speaker 4: I want to see if.

971
00:41:36,920 --> 00:41:39,719
Speaker 3: You will actually do anything when I actually leave, and

972
00:41:39,760 --> 00:41:41,920
Speaker 3: if he doesn't, I'm just going to get a divorce

973
00:41:42,120 --> 00:41:42,960
Speaker 3: and that's it.

974
00:41:43,320 --> 00:41:46,399
Speaker 4: And there is an update. But oh my goodness.

975
00:41:46,719 --> 00:41:51,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I kind of totally get it. Like

976
00:41:51,320 --> 00:41:56,000
Speaker 2: there's there's angsty teens and then there's like straight up

977
00:41:56,080 --> 00:41:58,800
Speaker 2: maniacs like this little lady over here.

978
00:41:58,920 --> 00:42:01,200
Speaker 1: Right, Yeah, I totally get it.

979
00:42:01,120 --> 00:42:03,759
Speaker 2: Because it's like it sucks, you know, you want to

980
00:42:03,800 --> 00:42:07,320
Speaker 2: stay with her the person. It's like, hey, you haven't

981
00:42:07,320 --> 00:42:11,719
Speaker 2: done anything wrong specifically, right, But I can't like live

982
00:42:11,800 --> 00:42:16,000
Speaker 2: in constant fear of like, right, what's gonna happen to me?

983
00:42:16,280 --> 00:42:18,600
Speaker 3: Yeah? Like I feel like with this kind of behavior

984
00:42:18,640 --> 00:42:21,560
Speaker 3: from a kid, like just yelling at them is not

985
00:42:21,800 --> 00:42:22,480
Speaker 3: enough parenting.

986
00:42:23,520 --> 00:42:25,040
Speaker 1: Well, it's like I don't even know what you do.

987
00:42:25,239 --> 00:42:28,000
Speaker 4: I don't know either, Like but more than that I'm sure.

988
00:42:28,280 --> 00:42:30,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, this is one of those ones where you got

989
00:42:30,280 --> 00:42:31,479
Speaker 1: to like really go.

990
00:42:31,480 --> 00:42:34,880
Speaker 2: To like a specialist specialist, like yeah, a like child

991
00:42:34,920 --> 00:42:37,920
Speaker 2: therapist that specializes in like probably like this this type

992
00:42:38,000 --> 00:42:40,920
Speaker 2: of behavior, right, and just like sit down with them

993
00:42:40,960 --> 00:42:43,360
Speaker 2: and be like, yo, what do I do because this

994
00:42:43,480 --> 00:42:44,879
Speaker 2: kid is wiling out?

995
00:42:46,040 --> 00:42:47,919
Speaker 3: Yeah, that would be good because I mean if they're

996
00:42:47,960 --> 00:42:50,120
Speaker 3: doing this as a kid, then it's like they're gonna

997
00:42:50,160 --> 00:42:52,200
Speaker 3: grow up and do even more insane things.

998
00:42:52,200 --> 00:42:55,560
Speaker 2: They haven't reached their Pokemon They're like level one, right,

999
00:42:55,640 --> 00:42:57,440
Speaker 2: they're like level one demon.

1000
00:42:57,920 --> 00:42:59,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, they're gonna evolve.

1001
00:42:59,640 --> 00:43:01,560
Speaker 4: We don't want them to evolve, not in this way.

1002
00:43:01,800 --> 00:43:03,640
Speaker 1: No, So yeah, I think I think she did pretty

1003
00:43:03,719 --> 00:43:05,400
Speaker 1: much everything she could for Yeah.

1004
00:43:05,160 --> 00:43:07,200
Speaker 3: She's out of control in this situation. Yeah, like she

1005
00:43:07,239 --> 00:43:09,440
Speaker 3: doesn't have any control. Yeah, but there is an update.

1006
00:43:10,120 --> 00:43:12,640
Speaker 3: Thank you for replying. I felt like I had to

1007
00:43:12,719 --> 00:43:16,040
Speaker 3: update you on this because so many people replied. Also,

1008
00:43:16,120 --> 00:43:18,200
Speaker 3: I forgot to add that her parents were divorced and

1009
00:43:18,239 --> 00:43:20,279
Speaker 3: she was like three or four years old, so it's

1010
00:43:20,280 --> 00:43:22,600
Speaker 3: not like she's mad I separated them or something.

1011
00:43:22,719 --> 00:43:25,640
Speaker 4: I'm addressing this because many people were asking in their replies.

1012
00:43:25,800 --> 00:43:26,319
Speaker 4: Another thing.

1013
00:43:26,360 --> 00:43:28,800
Speaker 3: I just remembered to add is that she never actually

1014
00:43:28,880 --> 00:43:31,160
Speaker 3: said that she hates me. For example, when she deleted

1015
00:43:31,160 --> 00:43:33,680
Speaker 3: the document on my laptop, her dad asked her, why

1016
00:43:33,719 --> 00:43:35,960
Speaker 3: does she hate me and why did she do it?

1017
00:43:36,080 --> 00:43:38,440
Speaker 3: And she literally said that she doesn't hate me, and

1018
00:43:38,440 --> 00:43:40,399
Speaker 3: how she doesn't have much of a reason to hate

1019
00:43:40,400 --> 00:43:43,359
Speaker 3: me because she kept insisting that she didn't delete it.

1020
00:43:43,480 --> 00:43:44,920
Speaker 4: That just sounds all like lies.

1021
00:43:45,280 --> 00:43:48,799
Speaker 1: I mean, it's just a classic, like I don't hate her.

1022
00:43:49,160 --> 00:43:52,520
Speaker 3: Right Like he just asked her if she hates her,

1023
00:43:52,800 --> 00:43:54,759
Speaker 3: and she just said nuh uh, and then that was

1024
00:43:54,760 --> 00:43:55,640
Speaker 3: like the end of her argument.

1025
00:43:55,760 --> 00:43:58,359
Speaker 4: Yes, that is exactly Whatizla was.

1026
00:43:58,840 --> 00:44:01,920
Speaker 3: Same thing when she other things, as I said, like

1027
00:44:02,040 --> 00:44:04,360
Speaker 3: move my stuff so I can't find it. At first,

1028
00:44:04,400 --> 00:44:07,479
Speaker 3: I genuinely thought I was going crazy because like, why

1029
00:44:07,480 --> 00:44:09,720
Speaker 3: would she insist that she didn't do it? I mean, okay,

1030
00:44:09,800 --> 00:44:11,719
Speaker 3: I feel like that's so easy to lie about that though,

1031
00:44:11,760 --> 00:44:13,960
Speaker 3: Like you're if you someone's being accused of something and

1032
00:44:13,960 --> 00:44:15,799
Speaker 3: they don't want to get in trouble, they're just gonna say, no,

1033
00:44:15,920 --> 00:44:16,520
Speaker 3: I didn't, I.

1034
00:44:16,520 --> 00:44:16,960
Speaker 4: Didn't do that.

1035
00:44:17,040 --> 00:44:19,480
Speaker 2: This is classic and she is like this is her

1036
00:44:19,760 --> 00:44:22,440
Speaker 2: tapping into her demon mode even harder because she's like,

1037
00:44:22,640 --> 00:44:24,680
Speaker 2: I'm just gonna keep telling you I didn't do it

1038
00:44:24,719 --> 00:44:27,880
Speaker 2: to infuriate you even further. And it's this, it's literally

1039
00:44:27,960 --> 00:44:30,239
Speaker 2: Opie's like tone. It is working, right.

1040
00:44:30,440 --> 00:44:30,799
Speaker 4: I don't know.

1041
00:44:30,880 --> 00:44:33,560
Speaker 3: I'm so behind Opee, but also like I feel like

1042
00:44:33,760 --> 00:44:36,000
Speaker 3: you shouldn't be surprised that she's saying that she.

1043
00:44:35,920 --> 00:44:37,279
Speaker 1: Didn't do it. Yeah, I remember said.

1044
00:44:37,360 --> 00:44:39,440
Speaker 3: I even told her I thought it was funny that

1045
00:44:39,520 --> 00:44:42,400
Speaker 3: she hit it just so she would admit, and she

1046
00:44:42,600 --> 00:44:45,080
Speaker 3: just kept on insisting that she didn't. But when she

1047
00:44:45,160 --> 00:44:47,480
Speaker 3: locked me out on the balcony, I saw her do it,

1048
00:44:47,560 --> 00:44:50,000
Speaker 3: and she did the same thing. She kept denying that

1049
00:44:50,080 --> 00:44:53,040
Speaker 3: she did it, even said that she was watching TV.

1050
00:44:52,920 --> 00:44:55,080
Speaker 4: At the time and stuff. She's got alibis and everything.

1051
00:44:55,160 --> 00:44:57,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, make her a lawyer, honestly, right.

1052
00:44:57,719 --> 00:45:00,120
Speaker 3: I don't know if it's to make it seem like

1053
00:45:00,160 --> 00:45:02,680
Speaker 3: I'm accusing her of doing things or what the heck

1054
00:45:02,760 --> 00:45:05,319
Speaker 3: is her problem? By the way, we would never have

1055
00:45:05,400 --> 00:45:08,600
Speaker 3: a problem if you join us live on YouTube, Facebook

1056
00:45:08,680 --> 00:45:11,080
Speaker 3: and TikTok every weekday at three pm PSD.

1057
00:45:11,200 --> 00:45:13,840
Speaker 4: Just top her profile, Oh, top our profile.

1058
00:45:13,960 --> 00:45:16,959
Speaker 3: Oh there is a little bit more, but I don't

1059
00:45:16,960 --> 00:45:18,120
Speaker 3: even know what else there is.

1060
00:45:18,160 --> 00:45:19,880
Speaker 4: To say, besides, she's an insane child.

1061
00:45:20,239 --> 00:45:25,440
Speaker 2: Again, like honestly, while the husband is on Op's side,

1062
00:45:25,520 --> 00:45:28,040
Speaker 2: like I don't think he did enough. Yeah, And I

1063
00:45:28,080 --> 00:45:30,520
Speaker 2: think this is you know, this is his kid. And

1064
00:45:30,640 --> 00:45:33,120
Speaker 2: I hate saying that because like there's some people like, oh, yeah, no,

1065
00:45:33,200 --> 00:45:34,879
Speaker 2: what do you get into the if you're married, that's

1066
00:45:34,880 --> 00:45:35,759
Speaker 2: your kid one thousand percent.

1067
00:45:36,080 --> 00:45:39,839
Speaker 1: Yeah, this is the child that spawned from him.

1068
00:45:40,960 --> 00:45:46,400
Speaker 2: And I think it is on you to like really

1069
00:45:46,480 --> 00:45:50,480
Speaker 2: diving deep and start trying to figure out solutions, especially

1070
00:45:50,520 --> 00:45:52,920
Speaker 2: like when she was like talking about leaving, was he

1071
00:45:53,080 --> 00:45:53,879
Speaker 2: like all right?

1072
00:45:54,200 --> 00:45:58,560
Speaker 1: Like right, what was his response with you? I get it?

1073
00:45:59,080 --> 00:46:02,440
Speaker 2: Go ahead, right, Like wouldn't you want to a like

1074
00:46:02,840 --> 00:46:06,799
Speaker 2: work to get solutions for your daughters insanity and then

1075
00:46:06,880 --> 00:46:09,279
Speaker 2: to try to save your relationship with your wife?

1076
00:46:09,400 --> 00:46:11,080
Speaker 3: This is just me, yeah, Like I feel like this

1077
00:46:11,160 --> 00:46:12,919
Speaker 3: is the kind of thing where if you like meet

1078
00:46:12,920 --> 00:46:15,160
Speaker 3: a crazy person when they're like an adult and then

1079
00:46:15,200 --> 00:46:17,759
Speaker 3: you're just like something went wrong in your childhood, like

1080
00:46:17,800 --> 00:46:20,719
Speaker 3: your parents did not discipline you enough or something like that,

1081
00:46:20,840 --> 00:46:24,880
Speaker 3: like this is that moment, you know, like this is

1082
00:46:24,960 --> 00:46:27,319
Speaker 3: just then the dad's just not doing it. So we'll

1083
00:46:27,320 --> 00:46:29,800
Speaker 3: find some sort of documentary in the future about someone

1084
00:46:30,120 --> 00:46:32,160
Speaker 3: get swallowing glass or something and.

1085
00:46:32,000 --> 00:46:33,120
Speaker 1: It's gonna be this person.

1086
00:46:33,239 --> 00:46:36,040
Speaker 4: Yeah, we found her, but there is still more tell

1087
00:46:36,040 --> 00:46:36,440
Speaker 4: the story.

1088
00:46:36,560 --> 00:46:38,800
Speaker 3: I once had to pick her up from school because

1089
00:46:38,840 --> 00:46:40,960
Speaker 3: nobody else could, so I had to do it. And

1090
00:46:41,000 --> 00:46:43,200
Speaker 3: the school's policy is that you have to get out

1091
00:46:43,239 --> 00:46:45,200
Speaker 3: of the car and come all the way inside. The

1092
00:46:45,239 --> 00:46:47,840
Speaker 3: teacher is like making sure that everyone went home safe,

1093
00:46:47,840 --> 00:46:50,200
Speaker 3: I guess. And in front of the teacher, she was

1094
00:46:50,239 --> 00:46:53,239
Speaker 3: acting really nice. She was being so fake, like she

1095
00:46:53,440 --> 00:46:56,480
Speaker 3: actually smiled and said hi and even hugged me. It

1096
00:46:56,520 --> 00:46:59,720
Speaker 3: infuriates me how people think that she's so nice and sweet,

1097
00:46:59,719 --> 00:47:02,680
Speaker 3: but in reality she's a completely different person.

1098
00:47:02,840 --> 00:47:04,799
Speaker 4: And that's it. That's all we get.

1099
00:47:05,080 --> 00:47:07,480
Speaker 1: Wow, Jesus' what is it? The gremlins?

1100
00:47:07,800 --> 00:47:10,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, that's like some I haven't seen it,

1101
00:47:10,040 --> 00:47:11,800
Speaker 2: but it's like whether it's the cute little things and they.

1102
00:47:11,600 --> 00:47:13,879
Speaker 4: Turn roun and it's just like pour water on them

1103
00:47:13,920 --> 00:47:14,280
Speaker 4: or something.

1104
00:47:14,560 --> 00:47:16,680
Speaker 3: So in this case, like instead of putting water on

1105
00:47:16,719 --> 00:47:19,080
Speaker 3: them or like whatever, all the other rules are you like,

1106
00:47:19,200 --> 00:47:21,880
Speaker 3: marry her dad and then she turns all crazy.

1107
00:47:22,160 --> 00:47:23,479
Speaker 4: I guess that's the rule in this case.

1108
00:47:23,560 --> 00:47:24,080
Speaker 1: That's the rule.

1109
00:47:24,200 --> 00:47:26,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's the end of our story, though we've got

1110
00:47:26,719 --> 00:47:27,759
Speaker 3: more common.

1111
00:47:27,719 --> 00:47:28,719
Speaker 4: Let's go see you there.

1112
00:47:28,880 --> 00:47:31,840
Speaker 2: I am jealous of my father's step grandchildren because I

1113
00:47:31,880 --> 00:47:35,200
Speaker 2: never received the same attention. Oh hi everyone, this is

1114
00:47:35,239 --> 00:47:37,200
Speaker 2: my very first ever read a post, and I thought

1115
00:47:37,200 --> 00:47:38,480
Speaker 2: this is the perfect group to pose it in.

1116
00:47:38,640 --> 00:47:40,360
Speaker 1: Sorry this turned into a rant.

1117
00:47:40,520 --> 00:47:43,879
Speaker 2: I twenty nine female have a strained relationship with my dad.

1118
00:47:43,920 --> 00:47:45,880
Speaker 2: I'm pretty sure he doesn't see it as strained, but

1119
00:47:45,960 --> 00:47:48,120
Speaker 2: from my side it is. By the way, this comes

1120
00:47:48,120 --> 00:47:51,080
Speaker 2: from secretly sociable on the arslash Okay, short time separate.

1121
00:47:51,160 --> 00:47:54,200
Speaker 2: So for some background my parents' divorce when I was four.

1122
00:47:54,320 --> 00:47:56,360
Speaker 2: Due to my dad's job, he had to move around

1123
00:47:56,400 --> 00:47:59,279
Speaker 2: the country and the United Kingdom a lot. My mom

1124
00:47:59,400 --> 00:48:01,600
Speaker 2: kept us in the same house and gave up a

1125
00:48:01,600 --> 00:48:03,719
Speaker 2: lot to make sure I grew up as happy as

1126
00:48:03,719 --> 00:48:05,959
Speaker 2: I could, doing the hobbies I wanted to do, which

1127
00:48:06,040 --> 00:48:08,239
Speaker 2: didn't come cheap for a single mother. Due to the

1128
00:48:08,280 --> 00:48:10,640
Speaker 2: distance my dad lived away from me, I only saw

1129
00:48:10,719 --> 00:48:14,040
Speaker 2: him three times a year during school holidays. What also

1130
00:48:14,080 --> 00:48:17,080
Speaker 2: didn't help was that when I was five, he married

1131
00:48:17,239 --> 00:48:21,000
Speaker 2: my ex stepmother, whose name is literally.

1132
00:48:20,600 --> 00:48:23,200
Speaker 1: Karen now literally married to Karen.

1133
00:48:23,320 --> 00:48:25,320
Speaker 4: She was born to be this terrible person.

1134
00:48:25,520 --> 00:48:28,719
Speaker 2: What are you doing, buddy? I loved my step siblings.

1135
00:48:28,760 --> 00:48:30,439
Speaker 2: One was the same age as me and the other

1136
00:48:30,520 --> 00:48:31,440
Speaker 2: was two years older than me.

1137
00:48:31,480 --> 00:48:34,719
Speaker 1: They were great. Freaking step mother Haron, on the other hand.

1138
00:48:34,880 --> 00:48:37,719
Speaker 4: Was not surprise, surprise, surprise, surprise.

1139
00:48:38,160 --> 00:48:41,280
Speaker 2: She never liked me, seemed jealous of me for some reason,

1140
00:48:41,400 --> 00:48:44,040
Speaker 2: and when bish about my mom in front of me

1141
00:48:44,280 --> 00:48:47,000
Speaker 2: with my dad and forced me to call her mom

1142
00:48:47,080 --> 00:48:49,360
Speaker 2: now sat to say. When I found out that she

1143
00:48:49,520 --> 00:48:51,920
Speaker 2: left my dad when I was ten, I was relieved

1144
00:48:51,960 --> 00:48:55,239
Speaker 2: and literally jumped up and down with joy once my

1145
00:48:55,400 --> 00:48:58,319
Speaker 2: dad ended the phone call. Dude, I was sad for

1146
00:48:58,400 --> 00:49:00,520
Speaker 2: my dad as it came out of left field for him,

1147
00:49:00,520 --> 00:49:03,080
Speaker 2: But as an adult, I can now see that Karen

1148
00:49:03,200 --> 00:49:05,080
Speaker 2: used my dad or his money.

1149
00:49:06,280 --> 00:49:09,160
Speaker 1: He wasn't rich, just had a really good paying job.

1150
00:49:09,280 --> 00:49:12,040
Speaker 2: She hung on for the family holiday to Disney World

1151
00:49:12,040 --> 00:49:15,279
Speaker 2: in Florida and getting qualified for her dream job, and

1152
00:49:15,320 --> 00:49:18,319
Speaker 2: then ditched my dad and I lost contact with my

1153
00:49:18,360 --> 00:49:21,920
Speaker 2: step siblings because she probably bished and lied about my

1154
00:49:22,000 --> 00:49:25,840
Speaker 2: dad to my step siblings, so they refused all contact. Anyways,

1155
00:49:25,920 --> 00:49:28,839
Speaker 2: the upside, my dad met his current partner, let's call

1156
00:49:28,880 --> 00:49:30,879
Speaker 2: her Hope. Hope came when I was twelve and they've

1157
00:49:30,920 --> 00:49:32,080
Speaker 2: been together ever since.

1158
00:49:32,239 --> 00:49:33,720
Speaker 1: I secretly wish that she had.

1159
00:49:33,560 --> 00:49:37,280
Speaker 2: Been my stepmother since I was five, because she is awesome,

1160
00:49:37,440 --> 00:49:39,480
Speaker 2: which brings me to now. I do love my dad,

1161
00:49:39,640 --> 00:49:41,360
Speaker 2: and I know a lot of the struggles I have

1162
00:49:41,640 --> 00:49:44,680
Speaker 2: with our relationship stem back to Karen and the rift

1163
00:49:44,719 --> 00:49:47,399
Speaker 2: that she caused, and only seeing him three times a year,

1164
00:49:47,440 --> 00:49:49,560
Speaker 2: a week at Christmas, a week at Easter, and then

1165
00:49:49,640 --> 00:49:52,040
Speaker 2: two weeks in the summer, which was enough for me

1166
00:49:52,239 --> 00:49:55,160
Speaker 2: because I hated going when he was with Karen. But

1167
00:49:55,280 --> 00:49:57,919
Speaker 2: when I was a teenager, Hope really helped my dad

1168
00:49:57,960 --> 00:50:00,560
Speaker 2: and I get close. Then I turned eighty years old,

1169
00:50:00,640 --> 00:50:02,560
Speaker 2: I had it off for university, and it was like

1170
00:50:02,600 --> 00:50:05,120
Speaker 2: my dad suddenly didn't know how to talk to me.

1171
00:50:05,360 --> 00:50:08,040
Speaker 2: The texting went back to infrequent, and I just shrugged

1172
00:50:08,080 --> 00:50:10,680
Speaker 2: it off because I had my mom anyways, and was

1173
00:50:10,800 --> 00:50:13,560
Speaker 2: enjoying learning to beat an adults. Yeah, when you're eighteen,

1174
00:50:13,680 --> 00:50:16,279
Speaker 2: Like that's like prime, Like I don't want to I'm

1175
00:50:16,320 --> 00:50:19,719
Speaker 2: just being I'm an adult kid. You know, I'm eating

1176
00:50:19,760 --> 00:50:20,600
Speaker 2: pizza with my friend.

1177
00:50:20,719 --> 00:50:23,400
Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly, Boba making your own decisions to act like

1178
00:50:23,400 --> 00:50:23,840
Speaker 3: a child.

1179
00:50:25,280 --> 00:50:26,560
Speaker 1: Very quick side story.

1180
00:50:27,239 --> 00:50:30,320
Speaker 2: I moved from Florida to hear when I was seventeen

1181
00:50:30,360 --> 00:50:32,600
Speaker 2: eighteen and I had never heard of boba, and I

1182
00:50:32,640 --> 00:50:33,280
Speaker 2: got flamed.

1183
00:50:33,560 --> 00:50:35,239
Speaker 1: Really, They're like, you don't know what boba is?

1184
00:50:35,600 --> 00:50:37,319
Speaker 4: Wow, fore they exiled you.

1185
00:50:37,360 --> 00:50:40,720
Speaker 1: They exiled me. That was my eighteen becoming an adult.

1186
00:50:40,840 --> 00:50:41,280
Speaker 4: Wow.

1187
00:50:41,520 --> 00:50:43,320
Speaker 1: I was drinking boba instead of talking to my parents.

1188
00:50:44,360 --> 00:50:47,600
Speaker 4: That sounds great. I don't even like boba really really, yeah.

1189
00:50:47,239 --> 00:50:49,400
Speaker 2: And I was spending my student loans on pizza and

1190
00:50:49,440 --> 00:50:52,600
Speaker 2: books and eating as much pasta meals as I wanted.

1191
00:50:52,760 --> 00:50:56,279
Speaker 2: At a time, Hope's children started to have kids. I

1192
00:50:56,400 --> 00:50:59,399
Speaker 2: like her kids, just not close because they are six

1193
00:50:59,480 --> 00:51:01,719
Speaker 2: to eight years older than me, and I get when

1194
00:51:01,760 --> 00:51:03,840
Speaker 2: my dad and Hope got together, they didn't want to

1195
00:51:03,840 --> 00:51:05,879
Speaker 2: hang out with this random twelve year old that would

1196
00:51:05,920 --> 00:51:08,960
Speaker 2: just occasionally show up. And now they've got growing daughters

1197
00:51:09,000 --> 00:51:11,719
Speaker 2: and I'm still single, still living at home with my mom.

1198
00:51:11,920 --> 00:51:14,160
Speaker 2: Poor mom. I left home twice for university and then

1199
00:51:14,200 --> 00:51:17,400
Speaker 2: came back. Anyways, over the past few years, I've gotten

1200
00:51:17,480 --> 00:51:19,799
Speaker 2: jealous of the girls because it feels like my dad

1201
00:51:19,880 --> 00:51:23,759
Speaker 2: is getting a do over at raising me. Lock in,

1202
00:51:23,840 --> 00:51:25,360
Speaker 2: I see what's gonna put and I see you in

1203
00:51:25,360 --> 00:51:28,160
Speaker 2: the chat. He never came to my school sports days

1204
00:51:28,239 --> 00:51:30,640
Speaker 2: or swimming competitions. I used to compete for the local

1205
00:51:30,680 --> 00:51:32,680
Speaker 2: team or come to any of the school shows that

1206
00:51:32,719 --> 00:51:35,960
Speaker 2: I acted in. Even though I would tell him via text,

1207
00:51:35,960 --> 00:51:38,279
Speaker 2: and I know my mom wouldn't have been against it

1208
00:51:38,400 --> 00:51:40,040
Speaker 2: because she didn't want me to miss out on a

1209
00:51:40,080 --> 00:51:43,160
Speaker 2: relationship with my dad. She even said she hated Karen,

1210
00:51:43,239 --> 00:51:46,279
Speaker 2: but she likes hope for my dad and me. Recently,

1211
00:51:46,400 --> 00:51:49,520
Speaker 2: one of the girls is competing in swimming and I have.

1212
00:51:49,440 --> 00:51:51,719
Speaker 1: To say she is much better than me. Ooh, that

1213
00:51:51,880 --> 00:51:52,759
Speaker 1: makes it hurt even more.

1214
00:51:53,400 --> 00:51:56,239
Speaker 2: She won old medals I never could, okay, and I

1215
00:51:56,320 --> 00:51:58,799
Speaker 2: would love her to make a professional go of it,

1216
00:51:58,960 --> 00:52:00,600
Speaker 2: as that is what he dreams of.

1217
00:52:00,680 --> 00:52:02,200
Speaker 1: She's nine years old right now.

1218
00:52:02,480 --> 00:52:04,719
Speaker 2: Last time I visited my dad, he took me to

1219
00:52:04,760 --> 00:52:08,280
Speaker 2: the younger ones school sports day, taking videos and photos

1220
00:52:08,600 --> 00:52:11,719
Speaker 2: like the proud granddad, and two days later we went

1221
00:52:11,760 --> 00:52:13,880
Speaker 2: to the nine year old swim meet. He kept talking

1222
00:52:13,880 --> 00:52:16,440
Speaker 2: about how well she was doing, how the team was

1223
00:52:16,440 --> 00:52:18,840
Speaker 2: thinking of her to compete in the next age bracket

1224
00:52:18,840 --> 00:52:19,200
Speaker 2: because she.

1225
00:52:19,239 --> 00:52:20,280
Speaker 1: Was getting so good.

1226
00:52:20,560 --> 00:52:21,000
Speaker 4: Wow.

1227
00:52:21,239 --> 00:52:25,040
Speaker 2: I was just sitting there getting angrier and angrier because

1228
00:52:25,080 --> 00:52:28,400
Speaker 2: he never came to anything with me. I think he

1229
00:52:28,440 --> 00:52:31,960
Speaker 2: knew something was up because he shyly asked me how

1230
00:52:32,040 --> 00:52:35,200
Speaker 2: well I did in swimming after I curtly explained how

1231
00:52:35,239 --> 00:52:38,319
Speaker 2: they'd run the competition from my own experience, and I

1232
00:52:38,360 --> 00:52:41,239
Speaker 2: curtly replied that over the few years I swam, I

1233
00:52:41,239 --> 00:52:44,360
Speaker 2: got a couple of bronze medals, a few silvers.

1234
00:52:44,200 --> 00:52:46,600
Speaker 1: And eight gold medals. But that was the end of that.

1235
00:52:46,680 --> 00:52:47,280
Speaker 1: Noways says.

1236
00:52:47,320 --> 00:52:50,080
Speaker 2: My mom once recorded a horse riding lesson where I

1237
00:52:50,160 --> 00:52:52,160
Speaker 2: was doing big jumps for me to show to my dad.

1238
00:52:52,280 --> 00:52:55,880
Speaker 1: He never watched it. Can't watch a video, aw and

1239
00:52:55,960 --> 00:52:56,719
Speaker 1: I know he loves me.

1240
00:52:56,880 --> 00:52:59,880
Speaker 2: I even got an apology text after my university graduation

1241
00:53:00,080 --> 00:53:03,120
Speaker 2: and he said how brilliantly my mom did in raising me.

1242
00:53:03,520 --> 00:53:06,120
Speaker 2: Skip mom's older brother that told her when I was

1243
00:53:06,160 --> 00:53:08,480
Speaker 2: five that I would go off the rails because my

1244
00:53:08,520 --> 00:53:11,600
Speaker 2: parents divorced. But since graduating the picture I gave my

1245
00:53:11,680 --> 00:53:13,319
Speaker 2: dad of me shaking the hand of.

1246
00:53:13,239 --> 00:53:15,760
Speaker 1: The university chancellor in my hat and robe.

1247
00:53:15,840 --> 00:53:18,920
Speaker 2: I once saw the picture half out of its cardboard frame,

1248
00:53:19,200 --> 00:53:22,319
Speaker 2: sat on top of a stack of CDs, but that

1249
00:53:22,600 --> 00:53:25,759
Speaker 2: was six years ago, so it's like one time six

1250
00:53:25,880 --> 00:53:28,000
Speaker 2: years ago I saw it like half opened on some

1251
00:53:28,080 --> 00:53:31,480
Speaker 2: old CDs. Yeah, it's like even six years ago, like

1252
00:53:31,960 --> 00:53:33,920
Speaker 2: CD's probably not using.

1253
00:53:33,719 --> 00:53:38,040
Speaker 3: Them reats not even framed right half.

1254
00:53:38,400 --> 00:53:41,640
Speaker 2: Like it's almost like even worse that it's like half opened,

1255
00:53:41,880 --> 00:53:44,440
Speaker 2: because at least if it was unopened, there's like plausible

1256
00:53:44,440 --> 00:53:46,160
Speaker 2: and I'd be like, oh, maybe he like didn't know

1257
00:53:46,200 --> 00:53:48,719
Speaker 2: what it was or he forgot to open it. But

1258
00:53:48,760 --> 00:53:51,919
Speaker 2: it's like he half opened. He's like, I'm good. Yeah,

1259
00:53:52,160 --> 00:53:54,279
Speaker 2: kept going, oh my god, he went back to his

1260
00:53:54,360 --> 00:53:57,840
Speaker 2: CD collection. So now there's not a single picture of

1261
00:53:57,880 --> 00:54:00,480
Speaker 2: me up at my dad's house. Used to be a

1262
00:54:00,480 --> 00:54:02,000
Speaker 2: picture of me and my dad when I was two

1263
00:54:02,080 --> 00:54:03,920
Speaker 2: years old, and one of me when I was at

1264
00:54:03,960 --> 00:54:08,080
Speaker 2: school Leavers Dance Slash Prom, but they have gone as well.

1265
00:54:08,200 --> 00:54:11,520
Speaker 2: But there are pictures of the grandkids everywhere. I've gotten

1266
00:54:11,600 --> 00:54:14,640
Speaker 2: undergrad degree and masters, and my dad has only ever

1267
00:54:14,680 --> 00:54:16,880
Speaker 2: said he was proud of me at both graduations, not

1268
00:54:16,960 --> 00:54:18,920
Speaker 2: when I got my job, not when I was in

1269
00:54:18,920 --> 00:54:22,360
Speaker 2: school passing my GCSEs and a levels.

1270
00:54:22,600 --> 00:54:23,640
Speaker 1: By the way, if.

1271
00:54:23,520 --> 00:54:26,640
Speaker 2: You want to score a perfect score, you can always

1272
00:54:26,680 --> 00:54:29,000
Speaker 2: tap our profile to join our lives every weekday at

1273
00:54:29,000 --> 00:54:29,680
Speaker 2: three PMPSD.

1274
00:54:29,719 --> 00:54:30,960
Speaker 1: We're live on YouTube, We're living.

1275
00:54:30,840 --> 00:54:33,359
Speaker 2: Facebook, probably live right now, the tap the profile, get

1276
00:54:33,360 --> 00:54:36,200
Speaker 2: on in here, cap it. But there's more to the story.

1277
00:54:36,360 --> 00:54:38,719
Speaker 2: What do you think Opie should do here? Does she

1278
00:54:38,800 --> 00:54:41,520
Speaker 2: do nothing? Does she like confront the dad? Like what

1279
00:54:41,760 --> 00:54:43,640
Speaker 2: what do you think is the best approach?

1280
00:54:43,880 --> 00:54:46,480
Speaker 3: I don't even know, because it's like, as op I

1281
00:54:46,520 --> 00:54:49,440
Speaker 3: would want to say so much to my dad and say, like,

1282
00:54:49,640 --> 00:54:52,600
Speaker 3: you know, like this is just really frustrating that like

1283
00:54:52,600 --> 00:54:55,160
Speaker 3: like it's hard to watch that, Like, you know, you

1284
00:54:55,239 --> 00:54:57,960
Speaker 3: were not this perfect dad to me, and you're it's

1285
00:54:58,000 --> 00:54:59,560
Speaker 3: great that you're being this perfect dad to her.

1286
00:54:59,480 --> 00:55:00,719
Speaker 4: But also like what the heck?

1287
00:55:00,840 --> 00:55:03,600
Speaker 3: You know? But it's also like there's nothing to do

1288
00:55:03,719 --> 00:55:05,839
Speaker 3: about it at this point too, because it's like it's

1289
00:55:05,840 --> 00:55:09,000
Speaker 3: already been done so and like I guess he's getting

1290
00:55:09,000 --> 00:55:12,200
Speaker 3: better for this new person, but it's like it's just

1291
00:55:12,360 --> 00:55:14,080
Speaker 3: like so unfair.

1292
00:55:14,239 --> 00:55:16,680
Speaker 1: This might sound like it's excusing him, but it's not.

1293
00:55:16,920 --> 00:55:20,080
Speaker 2: I think he might be just a complete idiot and

1294
00:55:20,160 --> 00:55:24,200
Speaker 2: not like putting two and two together fully in his brain.

1295
00:55:24,239 --> 00:55:26,080
Speaker 2: It seemed like he did a bit at the swim meet,

1296
00:55:26,320 --> 00:55:30,400
Speaker 2: or he's just so ashamed of himself. Yeah, he doesn't

1297
00:55:30,400 --> 00:55:32,840
Speaker 2: even want to like like almost like mentioning it is

1298
00:55:32,880 --> 00:55:36,480
Speaker 2: like acknowledging right what he's done. I think that it

1299
00:55:36,760 --> 00:55:39,680
Speaker 2: feels like it's weighing so heavily on Opie's heart.

1300
00:55:39,719 --> 00:55:40,920
Speaker 1: Like I think Opie.

1301
00:55:40,760 --> 00:55:43,000
Speaker 2: Deserves to be able to just like kind of sit

1302
00:55:43,120 --> 00:55:44,920
Speaker 2: him down and be like, hey, look, am I glad

1303
00:55:44,920 --> 00:55:48,080
Speaker 2: you're an active like granddad. Yeah, of course, like all

1304
00:55:48,120 --> 00:55:52,480
Speaker 2: the kids deserve that, but like you being like so active,

1305
00:55:52,560 --> 00:55:54,440
Speaker 2: and it's kind of like in my face, especially like

1306
00:55:54,440 --> 00:55:57,040
Speaker 2: the swim meets, like I have swim meets. You basically

1307
00:55:57,080 --> 00:55:59,480
Speaker 2: just kind of like read this post to him honestly, yeah,

1308
00:55:59,520 --> 00:56:01,920
Speaker 2: and then just like let him freaking stealing it.

1309
00:56:02,080 --> 00:56:04,680
Speaker 3: Right, You're probably right about that, Like you know, it

1310
00:56:04,760 --> 00:56:06,880
Speaker 3: could be the thing where it's like he's good now

1311
00:56:07,040 --> 00:56:09,880
Speaker 3: because he understands how much he messed up, you know

1312
00:56:09,880 --> 00:56:12,759
Speaker 3: what I mean. Maybe maybe he's just stupid or he's

1313
00:56:12,840 --> 00:56:14,759
Speaker 3: just I don't know, I don't know what happened, but

1314
00:56:14,800 --> 00:56:17,680
Speaker 3: obviously there was a change that doesn't just like randomly happen.

1315
00:56:17,920 --> 00:56:20,640
Speaker 3: So maybe you could just talk to him and be like, hey,

1316
00:56:20,719 --> 00:56:22,960
Speaker 3: like I just want to like see how you feel

1317
00:56:22,960 --> 00:56:25,520
Speaker 3: about this, because I just want to communicate how I

1318
00:56:25,520 --> 00:56:28,200
Speaker 3: feel really bad. Maybe there's something that they can do

1319
00:56:28,280 --> 00:56:30,200
Speaker 3: to kind of make up some of that time together

1320
00:56:30,440 --> 00:56:30,960
Speaker 3: or something.

1321
00:56:31,160 --> 00:56:33,719
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think it'll bring them closer together. Yeah, And

1322
00:56:33,760 --> 00:56:36,239
Speaker 2: it's kind of like it almost feels like this is

1323
00:56:36,280 --> 00:56:37,880
Speaker 2: maybe not the best way to frame it, but like

1324
00:56:38,000 --> 00:56:40,880
Speaker 2: letting him off the hook. And I think that he

1325
00:56:41,120 --> 00:56:45,400
Speaker 2: does need to understand the gravity of his actions.

1326
00:56:45,520 --> 00:56:48,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, he needs to be confronted by it a little bit. Yeah,

1327
00:56:48,040 --> 00:56:50,120
Speaker 3: instead of like avoiding it, which he probably is.

1328
00:56:50,400 --> 00:56:51,160
Speaker 1: That's what I'm thinking.

1329
00:56:51,280 --> 00:56:54,200
Speaker 4: Yeah, I wonder if it will happen after an.

1330
00:56:54,160 --> 00:56:57,359
Speaker 1: Update, Bunny. You say that because we got one.

1331
00:56:58,440 --> 00:57:01,760
Speaker 2: So I'm asking if I am the a hole because

1332
00:57:01,800 --> 00:57:04,319
Speaker 2: of how jealous I am of a nine year old

1333
00:57:04,400 --> 00:57:06,600
Speaker 2: and a seven year old for being annoyed at my

1334
00:57:06,719 --> 00:57:09,759
Speaker 2: dad and wanting to say something petty in revenge at

1335
00:57:09,800 --> 00:57:11,680
Speaker 2: my dad. But I am an extrovert, and while I

1336
00:57:11,840 --> 00:57:14,840
Speaker 2: may daydream about confronting my dad, I just don't have

1337
00:57:14,960 --> 00:57:16,960
Speaker 2: it in me. So if anyone has any good comments

1338
00:57:17,040 --> 00:57:20,920
Speaker 2: that hopefully won't lead to an argument, please let me know, again.

1339
00:57:20,760 --> 00:57:22,280
Speaker 1: Just to quickly cap that.

1340
00:57:22,560 --> 00:57:26,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think again, like, honestly, maybe just send this

1341
00:57:26,040 --> 00:57:26,600
Speaker 2: post to him.

1342
00:57:26,680 --> 00:57:27,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, if it's.

1343
00:57:27,320 --> 00:57:29,600
Speaker 2: I know it can be hard to confront, but it's like, hey, listen,

1344
00:57:29,720 --> 00:57:32,320
Speaker 2: I've been going through some things with everything you've been

1345
00:57:32,320 --> 00:57:35,000
Speaker 2: doing with the kids. If you care about me, read

1346
00:57:35,040 --> 00:57:36,400
Speaker 2: this and call me.

1347
00:57:36,560 --> 00:57:37,320
Speaker 1: Yes, that's it.

1348
00:57:37,400 --> 00:57:38,960
Speaker 4: I agree. All right, that's all.

1349
00:57:39,160 --> 00:57:40,280
Speaker 1: Here's John, you og host.

1350
00:57:40,280 --> 00:57:40,360
Speaker 4: Here.

1351
00:57:40,400 --> 00:57:41,720
Speaker 1: We're going to get back to the stories. But here's

1352
00:57:41,720 --> 00:57:43,640
Speaker 1: a quick three minute break of ass from our sponsors.

1353
00:57:44,320 --> 00:57:47,280
Speaker 3: My dad took my half siblings to a restaurant that

1354
00:57:47,520 --> 00:57:49,040
Speaker 3: I have been asking to go.

1355
00:57:48,960 --> 00:57:50,440
Speaker 4: To for years.

1356
00:57:50,600 --> 00:57:51,720
Speaker 1: Only give them half.

1357
00:57:51,480 --> 00:57:55,120
Speaker 3: A food a I nineteen female, have two half siblings

1358
00:57:55,120 --> 00:57:58,600
Speaker 3: for my dad and stepmother. My half siblings seven female

1359
00:57:58,600 --> 00:58:01,760
Speaker 3: and four male, both birthdays close to one another. By

1360
00:58:01,760 --> 00:58:05,280
Speaker 3: the way, this comes from different Intention twelve on the

1361
00:58:05,400 --> 00:58:08,320
Speaker 3: r slash Okay, story time separated. So my brother's birthday

1362
00:58:08,400 --> 00:58:11,320
Speaker 3: is early August and my sister's birthday is late September.

1363
00:58:11,520 --> 00:58:13,840
Speaker 3: This year, instead of having a birthday party for both

1364
00:58:13,840 --> 00:58:15,880
Speaker 3: of them, they both were allowed to pick.

1365
00:58:15,720 --> 00:58:17,280
Speaker 4: A trip for their special days.

1366
00:58:17,400 --> 00:58:20,959
Speaker 3: My brother chose to go to Sesame place, which isn't

1367
00:58:20,960 --> 00:58:23,200
Speaker 3: far from where they live, and my sister chose to

1368
00:58:23,280 --> 00:58:25,840
Speaker 3: go to Great Wolf Lodge for an overnight. I went

1369
00:58:25,880 --> 00:58:28,040
Speaker 3: to both events, making sure to be there for both

1370
00:58:28,040 --> 00:58:30,120
Speaker 3: of them since I don't see them often anymore. I

1371
00:58:30,160 --> 00:58:32,440
Speaker 3: told my dad I didn't expect the same treatment as

1372
00:58:32,480 --> 00:58:34,880
Speaker 3: them since I was an adult, only asking that he'd

1373
00:58:34,920 --> 00:58:35,320
Speaker 3: take me.

1374
00:58:35,320 --> 00:58:36,840
Speaker 4: To Red Robin. Wow, just Red.

1375
00:58:36,760 --> 00:58:39,880
Speaker 1: Robin, dude, that's like we need over here.

1376
00:58:40,120 --> 00:58:43,640
Speaker 3: It's not even like a like an expensive, fancy restaurant.

1377
00:58:43,680 --> 00:58:47,240
Speaker 2: It's at least or like some sort of something nice. Right,

1378
00:58:48,080 --> 00:58:50,760
Speaker 2: Just take me to McDonald's. Just give me some browns.

1379
00:58:51,160 --> 00:58:52,640
Speaker 4: That's all Hopie is asking, right.

1380
00:58:52,800 --> 00:58:55,320
Speaker 3: Red Robin was my favorite restaurant growing up, but I

1381
00:58:55,360 --> 00:58:57,480
Speaker 3: haven't been able to go since I was thirteen. My

1382
00:58:57,560 --> 00:59:00,200
Speaker 3: mom is allergic to onions and all food out Red

1383
00:59:00,280 --> 00:59:03,480
Speaker 3: Robin is cooked with onion powder, so she can't take me.

1384
00:59:03,720 --> 00:59:05,520
Speaker 3: I'm not over at my dad's enough for him to

1385
00:59:05,560 --> 00:59:08,720
Speaker 3: take me, but I was hoping maybe if I specifically asked,

1386
00:59:08,920 --> 00:59:12,240
Speaker 3: he would agree, but I was disappointed. My dad kept

1387
00:59:12,240 --> 00:59:14,960
Speaker 3: blowing me off every time I asked, telling me that

1388
00:59:15,040 --> 00:59:17,640
Speaker 3: they don't eat out and that they would make sure

1389
00:59:17,840 --> 00:59:19,360
Speaker 3: it was special regardless.

1390
00:59:19,400 --> 00:59:22,360
Speaker 2: Dude, it's like cheap is hack. Yeah, all you need

1391
00:59:22,400 --> 00:59:25,560
Speaker 2: to do, there's no way, there's nothing. Just walk in

1392
00:59:25,640 --> 00:59:27,520
Speaker 2: and sit down and pay twenty dollars.

1393
00:59:27,760 --> 00:59:30,040
Speaker 3: Fast forward to a few weeks ago, and I got

1394
00:59:30,040 --> 00:59:32,720
Speaker 3: a FaceTime for my stepmom. My stepmom and I both

1395
00:59:32,720 --> 00:59:35,040
Speaker 3: have iPhones, so she was how I spoke to my

1396
00:59:35,080 --> 00:59:37,320
Speaker 3: siblings when I wasn't there. As soon as I answered,

1397
00:59:37,360 --> 00:59:39,000
Speaker 3: I noticed that they were out somewhere.

1398
00:59:39,280 --> 00:59:40,800
Speaker 1: Oh oh no.

1399
00:59:41,520 --> 00:59:44,600
Speaker 3: I asked my sister where they were, and her answer

1400
00:59:44,920 --> 00:59:45,440
Speaker 3: broke me.

1401
00:59:45,680 --> 00:59:48,080
Speaker 4: They had gone to Red Robin Na.

1402
00:59:49,720 --> 00:59:54,400
Speaker 2: Nosh, why what are you doing? She's asking for so

1403
00:59:54,640 --> 00:59:59,520
Speaker 2: little absolute peanuts and then you take the peanuts and

1404
00:59:59,560 --> 01:00:00,640
Speaker 2: give them the someone else.

1405
01:00:00,760 --> 01:00:02,560
Speaker 1: Yes, I don't even offer.

1406
01:00:02,320 --> 01:00:05,720
Speaker 4: Any yes, like, oh my goodness, like it's so easy.

1407
01:00:05,840 --> 01:00:08,280
Speaker 3: I tried to ignore it and just talk to my siblings,

1408
01:00:08,320 --> 01:00:10,720
Speaker 3: but they weren't even talking to me. It was basically

1409
01:00:10,720 --> 01:00:13,120
Speaker 3: twenty minutes of me just watching them eat the food

1410
01:00:13,120 --> 01:00:15,080
Speaker 3: that I had been begging my dad.

1411
01:00:14,840 --> 01:00:15,440
Speaker 4: To take me to.

1412
01:00:15,880 --> 01:00:15,920
Speaker 3: No.

1413
01:00:16,400 --> 01:00:19,240
Speaker 1: Yes, so sad, so painful, that's so sad.

1414
01:00:19,640 --> 01:00:22,200
Speaker 3: Eventually I made an excuse that I had homework and

1415
01:00:22,320 --> 01:00:22,880
Speaker 3: ended the call.

1416
01:00:23,080 --> 01:00:25,280
Speaker 4: I'm not proud of it, but I broke down.

1417
01:00:25,520 --> 01:00:28,200
Speaker 3: I know it's stupid crying over food, but it wasn't

1418
01:00:28,280 --> 01:00:31,640
Speaker 3: just that they deliberately called me while out at a restaurant.

1419
01:00:31,680 --> 01:00:34,520
Speaker 3: I had actively told my dad I wanted to go to.

1420
01:00:34,720 --> 01:00:36,640
Speaker 3: I have a feeling that it's not on purpose, but

1421
01:00:36,680 --> 01:00:39,160
Speaker 3: at the same time, it's like, how can you ignore.

1422
01:00:38,840 --> 01:00:41,400
Speaker 2: That it would be Yeah, yeah, there's definitely some There's

1423
01:00:41,440 --> 01:00:42,400
Speaker 2: definitely a possibility.

1424
01:00:42,440 --> 01:00:46,000
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah. They could have called me after or even before.

1425
01:00:46,240 --> 01:00:49,000
Speaker 3: Anything would have been better than forcing me to watch

1426
01:00:49,040 --> 01:00:52,320
Speaker 3: my siblings eat the food that I had been craving

1427
01:00:52,680 --> 01:00:55,520
Speaker 3: for months. My siblings didn't even want to talk to me.

1428
01:00:55,760 --> 01:00:58,400
Speaker 3: I had to watch them eat and talk amongst themselves

1429
01:00:58,480 --> 01:00:59,919
Speaker 3: as if I wasn't even there.

1430
01:01:00,080 --> 01:01:03,120
Speaker 4: This is just so awful, so bad all the way around.

1431
01:01:03,520 --> 01:01:05,720
Speaker 3: I know it's really childish of me, but I broke

1432
01:01:05,760 --> 01:01:08,080
Speaker 3: down to my mom and best friend. My mother hates

1433
01:01:08,120 --> 01:01:10,040
Speaker 3: my dad. Oh, I guess they're divorced.

1434
01:01:10,080 --> 01:01:10,560
Speaker 1: There we go.

1435
01:01:10,760 --> 01:01:13,880
Speaker 3: Mostly because he pulls shady stuff like this to me

1436
01:01:14,040 --> 01:01:16,720
Speaker 3: on a regular basis. It is really messed up my

1437
01:01:16,760 --> 01:01:19,560
Speaker 3: mental health and I have really been struggling. My mother

1438
01:01:19,760 --> 01:01:22,240
Speaker 3: was furious, to say the least, and decided to take

1439
01:01:22,240 --> 01:01:24,960
Speaker 3: me to Red Robin despite her allergy to make me happy.

1440
01:01:25,000 --> 01:01:25,520
Speaker 4: There you go.

1441
01:01:26,800 --> 01:01:30,200
Speaker 3: Awesome. My best friend was also angry at my father.

1442
01:01:30,320 --> 01:01:32,560
Speaker 3: A part of me just wants an outsider opinion since

1443
01:01:32,600 --> 01:01:34,240
Speaker 3: the two people I talked to are.

1444
01:01:34,080 --> 01:01:35,280
Speaker 4: Both a little biased.

1445
01:01:35,520 --> 01:01:38,840
Speaker 3: So reddits am I the bad apple for being mad

1446
01:01:38,880 --> 01:01:41,640
Speaker 3: at my dad for taking my siblings to Red Robin

1447
01:01:41,800 --> 01:01:43,160
Speaker 3: There is an edit?

1448
01:01:43,400 --> 01:01:46,000
Speaker 4: But what do we think? John? No, is she the

1449
01:01:46,040 --> 01:01:46,640
Speaker 4: bad apple?

1450
01:01:46,800 --> 01:01:47,400
Speaker 1: Not at all?

1451
01:01:47,480 --> 01:01:49,800
Speaker 2: Like, dude, I want to do something to the dad.

1452
01:01:49,800 --> 01:01:52,960
Speaker 2: I want him to suffer, I want him to have pin.

1453
01:01:53,960 --> 01:01:56,600
Speaker 3: It's just so because it's like I don't know I mean,

1454
01:01:56,640 --> 01:01:59,920
Speaker 3: I don't know them, but I want to believe that

1455
01:02:00,040 --> 01:02:02,720
Speaker 3: there was no like malicious intent behind it. Yeah, but

1456
01:02:02,760 --> 01:02:06,520
Speaker 3: there's definitely like some sort of neglect to what OPI

1457
01:02:06,920 --> 01:02:08,120
Speaker 3: has been asking for.

1458
01:02:08,320 --> 01:02:11,439
Speaker 1: I think because it was I believe this step.

1459
01:02:11,120 --> 01:02:14,040
Speaker 2: Mom that called right right, she was like, oh, the

1460
01:02:14,040 --> 01:02:15,920
Speaker 2: stepmom has an iPhone so I can FaceTime.

1461
01:02:16,120 --> 01:02:17,280
Speaker 1: That's how I talked to the kids.

1462
01:02:17,400 --> 01:02:20,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, so it sounds like the stepmom was like, oh,

1463
01:02:20,280 --> 01:02:21,960
Speaker 2: like I could see her, like, hey, let's go to

1464
01:02:22,040 --> 01:02:25,040
Speaker 2: Red Robin's. I'm gonna call her and then I'm just

1465
01:02:25,080 --> 01:02:26,760
Speaker 2: gonna like I don't know if she just did she

1466
01:02:26,880 --> 01:02:28,800
Speaker 2: just put the phone on a ketchup bottle and then

1467
01:02:28,840 --> 01:02:30,560
Speaker 2: they were just like watching a meat because it's like

1468
01:02:31,040 --> 01:02:32,640
Speaker 2: she's like, oh yeah, they're just like eating and not

1469
01:02:32,720 --> 01:02:33,280
Speaker 2: talking to me.

1470
01:02:33,640 --> 01:02:35,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, like it's crazy.

1471
01:02:35,480 --> 01:02:37,560
Speaker 3: But then like, I feel like the mom should have

1472
01:02:38,080 --> 01:02:40,920
Speaker 3: noticed that the kids aren't talking to her and then

1473
01:02:41,000 --> 01:02:41,800
Speaker 3: like either like.

1474
01:02:41,880 --> 01:02:43,919
Speaker 4: Urge them to talk. I want it, and that would

1475
01:02:43,960 --> 01:02:44,600
Speaker 4: be crazy.

1476
01:02:44,720 --> 01:02:46,680
Speaker 1: That's what I'm kind of thinking.

1477
01:02:46,400 --> 01:02:47,160
Speaker 4: Is happening here.

1478
01:02:47,240 --> 01:02:49,400
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, Like, I so want to believe that

1479
01:02:49,440 --> 01:02:50,680
Speaker 3: it's just a stupid mistake.

1480
01:02:50,720 --> 01:02:51,680
Speaker 4: But you might be right.

1481
01:02:51,720 --> 01:02:56,080
Speaker 3: You might be right, But there is more to the story,

1482
01:02:56,240 --> 01:03:00,360
Speaker 3: so we haven't edits, ladies and gentlemen. No, I have

1483
01:03:00,440 --> 01:03:03,240
Speaker 3: seen a lot of comments regarding this. So here, I

1484
01:03:03,280 --> 01:03:05,520
Speaker 3: cannot drive. I don't have my license due to my

1485
01:03:05,560 --> 01:03:08,360
Speaker 3: ADHD being really severe. I am paranoid that I'll end

1486
01:03:08,440 --> 01:03:10,920
Speaker 3: up getting distracted by something and get into an accident.

1487
01:03:10,960 --> 01:03:13,200
Speaker 3: So I'm not learning quite yet another thing. All of

1488
01:03:13,200 --> 01:03:15,880
Speaker 3: my friends are away for college. I do college from

1489
01:03:15,880 --> 01:03:18,400
Speaker 3: home because I cannot drive. I often need people to

1490
01:03:18,440 --> 01:03:21,640
Speaker 3: take me places, or I just walk if it isn't far. Finally,

1491
01:03:21,800 --> 01:03:24,600
Speaker 3: I cannot just cut contact with my father. From growing

1492
01:03:24,680 --> 01:03:26,880
Speaker 3: up in a broken home and living with mental abuse

1493
01:03:26,880 --> 01:03:29,560
Speaker 3: for my father and stepmom, I promised myself that I

1494
01:03:29,600 --> 01:03:31,560
Speaker 3: would be a comfort person to my siblings.

1495
01:03:31,640 --> 01:03:32,800
Speaker 4: All that's so tough.

1496
01:03:32,920 --> 01:03:35,760
Speaker 2: Wow, and so be saying like that her dad and

1497
01:03:35,800 --> 01:03:38,160
Speaker 2: stepmom emotionally or mentally.

1498
01:03:38,760 --> 01:03:38,960
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1499
01:03:39,040 --> 01:03:42,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, So she's literally just staying and like dealing

1500
01:03:42,280 --> 01:03:45,240
Speaker 3: with that herself so that she can be there for

1501
01:03:45,240 --> 01:03:46,320
Speaker 3: the other kids.

1502
01:03:46,360 --> 01:03:47,760
Speaker 4: That is so much pressure and.

1503
01:03:47,680 --> 01:03:50,919
Speaker 3: She's only like nineteen, Yeah, I mean, so much responsibility.

1504
01:03:51,040 --> 01:03:53,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, I totally, I totally understand it, and it's very

1505
01:03:53,880 --> 01:03:56,240
Speaker 2: noble of her. But yeah, I'm like, that's tough.

1506
01:03:56,160 --> 01:03:58,960
Speaker 3: That's yeah, yeah, because sometimes you have to like have

1507
01:03:59,080 --> 01:04:01,840
Speaker 3: certain boundaries for your but I understand that, Like you

1508
01:04:01,880 --> 01:04:03,960
Speaker 3: can't go no contact.

1509
01:04:03,720 --> 01:04:06,960
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, it's a tough position. Yeah.

1510
01:04:07,040 --> 01:04:09,200
Speaker 3: They are innocent in all of this, and it's not

1511
01:04:09,280 --> 01:04:12,120
Speaker 3: fair for them to deal with my dad and stepmom's problems.

1512
01:04:12,280 --> 01:04:14,959
Speaker 3: I cannot just abandon them. And since I can't drive,

1513
01:04:15,040 --> 01:04:17,440
Speaker 3: my only option is to go see them rather than

1514
01:04:17,520 --> 01:04:20,880
Speaker 3: taking them out. I think that's everything. Thank you for

1515
01:04:21,080 --> 01:04:24,080
Speaker 3: so many comments in under an hour. Oh my goodness,

1516
01:04:24,160 --> 01:04:27,120
Speaker 3: but ated number two. I got a comment that was

1517
01:04:27,200 --> 01:04:29,680
Speaker 3: a little brute and decided to clear this up. My

1518
01:04:29,760 --> 01:04:34,640
Speaker 3: full ADHD diagnosis is ADHD with severe autistic tendencies, along

1519
01:04:34,720 --> 01:04:39,920
Speaker 3: with two side diagnoses of anxiety and sensory processing disorder

1520
01:04:40,080 --> 01:04:42,880
Speaker 3: or SPD, So on top of my fear of car accidents,

1521
01:04:42,920 --> 01:04:46,600
Speaker 3: i'm borderline spectrum. My diagnosis only missed one point on

1522
01:04:46,640 --> 01:04:50,280
Speaker 3: the autism diagnosis test. I have SPD, which makes my

1523
01:04:50,320 --> 01:04:54,000
Speaker 3: eyes and ears severely sensitive. Even being in a car

1524
01:04:54,080 --> 01:04:57,480
Speaker 3: at night gives me migraines. And I have severe anxiety,

1525
01:04:57,520 --> 01:04:59,880
Speaker 3: which makes even trying to learn how to drive a

1526
01:05:00,000 --> 01:05:04,200
Speaker 3: one hundred times harder. But you know something that's super easy?

1527
01:05:04,400 --> 01:05:04,880
Speaker 1: What is that?

1528
01:05:04,920 --> 01:05:09,320
Speaker 3: Angels joining us live on YouTube, Facebook and TikTok every

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01:05:09,320 --> 01:05:10,800
Speaker 3: single day at through PMBAC.

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01:05:11,080 --> 01:05:11,960
Speaker 1: Don't you know it?

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01:05:11,960 --> 01:05:15,760
Speaker 4: It's all you gotta do is top our profile. Op says.

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01:05:16,000 --> 01:05:19,040
Speaker 3: Also, I am on the highest dose of ADHD medication

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01:05:19,440 --> 01:05:20,480
Speaker 3: legally allowed.

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01:05:20,960 --> 01:05:22,280
Speaker 1: Wow, let's break the law.

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01:05:22,360 --> 01:05:23,440
Speaker 4: I don't even know what that is.

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01:05:24,360 --> 01:05:26,760
Speaker 3: I have been on this medication since third grade, and

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01:05:26,840 --> 01:05:29,480
Speaker 3: it really only helps me focus enough to pass school.

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01:05:29,640 --> 01:05:30,520
Speaker 4: I still get.

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01:05:30,320 --> 01:05:34,040
Speaker 3: Easily distracted, still cannot sit still another problem with learning

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01:05:34,040 --> 01:05:37,160
Speaker 3: how to drive, and cannot speak clearly without stuttering or

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01:05:37,240 --> 01:05:40,760
Speaker 3: getting sidetracked. I also daydream too much for comfort and

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01:05:40,840 --> 01:05:44,400
Speaker 3: often don't even realize until someone snaps me back into reality.

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01:05:44,640 --> 01:05:48,360
Speaker 3: So no, I cannot just medicate my ADHD and learn

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01:05:48,400 --> 01:05:50,760
Speaker 3: to drive. It's not as simple as that. Thanks for

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01:05:50,800 --> 01:05:53,720
Speaker 3: all the supportive comments you guys. This literally when viral

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01:05:53,800 --> 01:05:56,320
Speaker 3: in only two hours, y'all are amazing.

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01:05:56,480 --> 01:06:00,280
Speaker 1: We going viral baby, viral movie.

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01:06:00,760 --> 01:06:01,920
Speaker 4: But dang, that's a lot.

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01:06:02,000 --> 01:06:04,200
Speaker 3: I really wonder if it's one of those cases where

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01:06:04,240 --> 01:06:07,080
Speaker 3: like the dad and stepmom don't know how to handle all.

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01:06:06,960 --> 01:06:09,600
Speaker 4: Of those mental health issues.

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01:06:09,560 --> 01:06:12,520
Speaker 3: And are like just not treating her well because of that,

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01:06:12,920 --> 01:06:15,560
Speaker 3: And you know what I mean, Like there's so many stories.

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01:06:15,160 --> 01:06:18,120
Speaker 2: Like that they like doubly suck. If that's the case, Yeah,

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01:06:18,440 --> 01:06:20,800
Speaker 2: I think leaning on the mom. She probably already does this,

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01:06:20,880 --> 01:06:24,640
Speaker 2: but like, yeah, leaning on the mom because like again

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01:06:24,720 --> 01:06:27,840
Speaker 2: it's it's tough. I totally it's very noble of Ope

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01:06:28,040 --> 01:06:30,640
Speaker 2: to want to look out for the step siblings. Yeah,

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01:06:30,760 --> 01:06:34,400
Speaker 2: but like you said, it's like also having boundaries in

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01:06:34,600 --> 01:06:38,680
Speaker 2: place and like just setting yourself up for success, especially

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01:06:39,040 --> 01:06:41,680
Speaker 2: with everything that OPI mentioned that she she has to,

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01:06:41,800 --> 01:06:43,720
Speaker 2: you know, to deal with and work with. So like,

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01:06:44,320 --> 01:06:46,120
Speaker 2: I think I would go to the mom and try

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01:06:46,120 --> 01:06:48,160
Speaker 2: and lean on her as much as possible, and like

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01:06:48,600 --> 01:06:50,440
Speaker 2: maybe even just like like I wonder if she's like

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01:06:50,440 --> 01:06:52,040
Speaker 2: talk to him and like, hey, like, I want to

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01:06:52,080 --> 01:06:53,880
Speaker 2: be there for the step siblings, but I like also

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01:06:53,960 --> 01:06:57,880
Speaker 2: want to protect my own sanity from with these freaking

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01:06:58,400 --> 01:06:59,640
Speaker 2: whack ass people.

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01:06:59,800 --> 01:07:01,400
Speaker 1: So what do I do?

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01:07:01,600 --> 01:07:04,400
Speaker 3: Yeh, Because I wonder if like any of these small moments.

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01:07:04,480 --> 01:07:06,919
Speaker 3: I mean, I'm sure that in the divorce the mom

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01:07:07,040 --> 01:07:09,680
Speaker 3: is definitely confronted the dad about this kind of stuff,

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01:07:09,760 --> 01:07:12,320
Speaker 3: But like, I wonder just since then, because that was

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01:07:12,360 --> 01:07:15,080
Speaker 3: like a long long time ago, I think, I feel

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01:07:15,160 --> 01:07:18,840
Speaker 3: like or I wonder how much the mom has said

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01:07:18,920 --> 01:07:21,440
Speaker 3: or like stood up for Opie, or if Op's like

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01:07:21,440 --> 01:07:23,720
Speaker 3: stood up for herself in this time, you know what

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01:07:23,720 --> 01:07:25,600
Speaker 3: I mean, just about these small things, Like I'm sure

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01:07:25,640 --> 01:07:28,400
Speaker 3: stuff happened with like all the mental abuse as a kid,

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01:07:28,600 --> 01:07:29,560
Speaker 3: I'm sure.

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01:07:29,280 --> 01:07:31,800
Speaker 4: But I really wonder if even these small things have

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01:07:31,840 --> 01:07:32,440
Speaker 4: been talked about.

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01:07:32,480 --> 01:07:35,040
Speaker 2: It's a great point have the mom basically tell the

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01:07:35,080 --> 01:07:37,040
Speaker 2: mom and be like, hey, like, I want to make

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01:07:37,080 --> 01:07:39,480
Speaker 2: sure that they both know that this is not right.

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01:07:39,600 --> 01:07:40,960
Speaker 4: That's so tough, though, Opie.

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Speaker 3: But that is the end of the story, and I

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01:07:43,160 --> 01:07:46,400
Speaker 3: think the end of the episode. If you love us,

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01:07:46,600 --> 01:07:49,480
Speaker 3: make sure to subscribe we love you and see it