Speaker 1: I won't let my body out me outwait everything that
Speaker 1: I'm made dope, won't spend my life trying to change.
Speaker 1: I'm learning to love who I am. I get I'm strong,
Speaker 1: I feel free, I know who every part of me
Speaker 1: it's beautiful. And then hello always out wait if you
Speaker 1: feel it with your hands, and there she'll love to
Speaker 1: the boom by the let's say good day and time
Speaker 1: did you and die out? Happy Saturday. Outweigh fam Amy
Speaker 1: here and it's just gonna be me solo for this episode.
Speaker 1: I'm going to start off with an email that Lisa
Speaker 1: and I got, though you can always email us. We
Speaker 1: love hearing from you. Hello, Outweigh podcast dot com and
Speaker 1: a fellow listener, so just like you listening right now,
Speaker 1: Sarah sent this in and I thought, I want to
Speaker 1: read this email on the podcast as encouragement for others listening.
Speaker 1: And Sarah is the reason why we do this podcast.
Speaker 1: You listening right now, that is why we do this.
Speaker 1: I assume maybe you're taking in our episodes, hopefully over
Speaker 1: the weekend if you need it, or maybe one day
Speaker 1: during the week when you're on a walk. But it's
Speaker 1: just that one sliver of encouragement throughout the week. Hopefully
Speaker 1: you have multiple slivers of encouragement happening and coming from
Speaker 1: different resources and places and people. But Outweigh, like our hope.
Speaker 1: Lisa and I both just want you to at least
Speaker 1: have that. If you don't have those others, you at
Speaker 1: least have Outweigh that you can count on for. You know,
Speaker 1: fifty minutes of something that is going to make you
Speaker 1: not feel alone is going to give you that extra
Speaker 1: bost of encouragement that you need to keep going because
Speaker 1: I know firsthand that living with an eating disorder or
Speaker 1: any disordered eating behaviors that alter your life, it's exhausting
Speaker 1: and it can feel lonely and there's a lot of shame.
Speaker 1: So we're gonna get into some of that today. But
Speaker 1: like I said, we're going to start off with an
Speaker 1: email from Sarah. She said, Hey, I just wanted to
Speaker 1: thank you for this podcast and being a safe place
Speaker 1: for people like myself who are recovering from disordered eating.
Speaker 1: Throughout the pandemic and the last few years, I unknowingly
Speaker 1: developed many disordered eating habits and it started to significantly
Speaker 1: impact my physical health. I've been listening since the beginning
Speaker 1: and I've learned that this is my absolute safe space
Speaker 1: to listen, knowing that you won't allow negative body talk,
Speaker 1: suggestive behaviors that could be harmful to those in recovery,
Speaker 1: and overall a healthy way to respect and learn about
Speaker 1: our bodies. I noticed the impact when I listened to
Speaker 1: an episode of another podcast yesterday and could start picking
Speaker 1: up disordered discussion. Because of your podcast, I knew it
Speaker 1: wasn't healthy to continue to listen, so I skipped that
Speaker 1: episode altogether. Prior to outweigh I probably would have continued
Speaker 1: listening to pick up on tips and further connect that
Speaker 1: eating disorder behavior. I'm so so thankful for the work
Speaker 1: that you'll do your friend Sarah, which Sarah, thank you
Speaker 1: for sharing that. And that's what we want this to
Speaker 1: be again, A safe place, your encouragement, a place where
Speaker 1: you're not going to feel any judgment, a place where
Speaker 1: hopefully you won't get triggered. I say that because sometimes
Speaker 1: I'm not always perfect and I might say something that
Speaker 1: might throw someone. That's why I don't ever do episodes alone.
Speaker 1: Lisa and I weren't able to connect this week, so
Speaker 1: here we are. It is just me and I don't
Speaker 1: consider myself to be an expert in any way, shape
Speaker 1: or form, And I'm going to be sharing things today
Speaker 1: that are from experts that we know and trust and
Speaker 1: hopefully will yes be that sliver of encouragement that you
Speaker 1: need as you go into this weekend, this week ahead.
Speaker 1: And I just want to, you know, make sure you'll
Speaker 1: know that if if you're new to the podcast, I'm
Speaker 1: not the expert. Lisa is the registered dietitian that has
Speaker 1: an emphasis in eating disorders and it's her passion and
Speaker 1: she is just very wise and knowledgeable when it comes
Speaker 1: to this field. And we have Cat de Fata on
Speaker 1: at times, he's a licensed therapist. We have other experts
Speaker 1: that come and bring their amazing wealth of knowledge to
Speaker 1: us where I feel safe talking with them because I
Speaker 1: know that if I say anything triggering, they're gonna they're
Speaker 1: gonna call me out. Because I host Four Things with
Speaker 1: Amy Brown, and that's a podcast I've done for a
Speaker 1: few years now, way longer than Outweigh, And there is
Speaker 1: a time in my career where I have said things
Speaker 1: either on the podcast or on the Bobby Bones Show
Speaker 1: that have been triggering and toxic and I didn't realize
Speaker 1: I was spreading disordered topics or encouraging people to engage
Speaker 1: in disordered behavior, having disordered discussion kind of like Sarah
Speaker 1: said in the email, she was listening to an episode
Speaker 1: of another podcast and immediately she could start picking up
Speaker 1: on the disordered talk and she was able to shut
Speaker 1: it down. Like Taylor Swift said in her documentary or
Speaker 1: little movie thing that she put out, she sometimes has
Speaker 1: to change the channel. And that's literally what Sarah did
Speaker 1: with that podcast is she skipped that episode altogether. She
Speaker 1: was able to shut it down. She changed the channel
Speaker 1: before it got into her little head or big head
Speaker 1: I guess I should say, and started to impact her
Speaker 1: day because I used to do that. I would pick
Speaker 1: up on things from other people, but then I was
Speaker 1: the person also delivering the things for people to pick
Speaker 1: up on. And I don't like that that's part of
Speaker 1: my past. But also I'm thankful for it, because I'm
Speaker 1: thankful for how I've evolved and that there's been growth
Speaker 1: and that I have proof of that and that we're
Speaker 1: allowed to change and again evolve. If you're not evolving,
Speaker 1: you're dead. I had some girlfriends over a couple of
Speaker 1: weeks ago for my birthday, and that was like our
Speaker 1: theme of the night, and we were talking about ways
Speaker 1: where we've grown, and then we would all like say
Speaker 1: together out loud, if you're not evolving, you're dead. So
Speaker 1: I just want to give you that quote as well.
Speaker 1: And everybody evolves in their own time, eating disorder recovery
Speaker 1: or disordered behavior recovery. It takes a lot of work,
Speaker 1: and you are on your own timeline, So don't feel shame.
Speaker 1: And if you're not where I am now in what
Speaker 1: I consider to be full recovery. But honestly, I still
Speaker 1: have thoughts in my brain like I don't know will
Speaker 1: I ever be back in the throes of this. I
Speaker 1: don't know. I hope not. And I'm thankful for the
Speaker 1: tools that I have in my toolbox that will hopefully
Speaker 1: keep me where I am and I can continue to
Speaker 1: be an encouragement to each of you and be that
Speaker 1: that story of hope. Because I never thought I would
Speaker 1: be this person. I just thought this was going to
Speaker 1: be something that I had to live with the rest
Speaker 1: of my life. And it was daunting and tiring and
Speaker 1: exhausting and frustrating and sad and depressing and all the things.
Speaker 1: It was low On the outside, people probably saw me
Speaker 1: as high, but in my personal private moments at home,
Speaker 1: it was very very very low and so many feelings
Speaker 1: of shame. Which leads me to the next thing that
Speaker 1: I'm going to share with you, which is from one
Speaker 1: of my favorites, Jennifer Rowland. We've had her on the
Speaker 1: podcast multiple times, we talk about her all the time.
Speaker 1: I follow on Instagram. She is just awesome. Now. She
Speaker 1: is an eating disorder therapist, and she put up a
Speaker 1: blog post called Eating Disorders and Feelings of Shame, and
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna read it. Like I said, we don't
Speaker 1: have an expert on as a guest today, but I'm
Speaker 1: going to bring the expert to you. And as you're walking,
Speaker 1: I want you to take in these words. If you're walking,
Speaker 1: or as you're sitting, or you're running errands, or you're
Speaker 1: doing things at your house, however you listen to podcasts.
Speaker 1: I just listen to so many podcasts while I walk
Speaker 1: that I picture you listening out there right now walking.
Speaker 1: But you don't even have to be moving while you
Speaker 1: listen to this at all if you do not feel
Speaker 1: like doing that at all. But for me, that's something
Speaker 1: I like to do when I listen to podcasts. So
Speaker 1: this blog is called Eating Disorders and Feelings of Shame.
Speaker 1: I shouldn't feel so anxious around food. This shouldn't be
Speaker 1: so hard. It's my fault that I developed an eating disorder.
Speaker 1: I'm just such a shallow person. I often see clients
Speaker 1: struggling with feelings of shame around their eating disorders, thoughts,
Speaker 1: or behaviors. I've also had clients who express feeling like
Speaker 1: it was some of their own choices which led them
Speaker 1: to develop a neating disorder. The reality is that I've
Speaker 1: never seen anyone successfully shame themselves into recovery from an
Speaker 1: eating disorder. Shame actually can cause people to be dishonest, disconnected,
Speaker 1: and not reach out for support when they need it.
Speaker 1: The antidote to shame is having the courage to be vulnerable.
Speaker 1: It's having the strength to reach out to someone and say, actually,
Speaker 1: I'm not okay. It's also important to practice self compassion,
Speaker 1: especially when self critical or shame based thoughts start to
Speaker 1: come up. The following is an example of how you
Speaker 1: can start to respond to your eating disorder thoughts with
Speaker 1: more compassionate ones. It can be helpful to picture how
Speaker 1: you might respond to a friend or a loved one
Speaker 1: who was struggling. Eating disorder thought, I shouldn't feel so
Speaker 1: anxious around food. Compassionate response. It's perfectly understandable that I'm
Speaker 1: feeling anxious around food. I'm in recovery from an eating disorder,
Speaker 1: and this is how my manifests. How can I take
Speaker 1: the next pro recovery action anyways, Eating disorder thought, this
Speaker 1: shouldn't be so hard. Compassionate response. If recovery were easy,
Speaker 1: that my therapist and dietitian wouldn't have jobs. Recovery is
Speaker 1: definitely tough, but it will get easier with time and practice.
Speaker 1: Eating disorder thought, it's my fault that I developed a
Speaker 1: needing disorder. Compassionate response. No one would choose to develop
Speaker 1: in eating disorder. They're miserable, the same way that no
Speaker 1: one would choose to have cancer. However, recovery is a
Speaker 1: choice that I can keep making in each moment. Eating
Speaker 1: disorder thought, I'm such a shallow person. Compassionate response. If
Speaker 1: I were truly shallow, I wouldn't feel so distressed about
Speaker 1: the fact that I'm fixating on weight. I'm not hello,
Speaker 1: I'm someone who is in recovery from an eating disorder.
Speaker 1: It's perfectly understandable that I'm going to have a tough
Speaker 1: time with body image as this is one of my symptoms.
Speaker 1: What can I do to be kind to myself right now?
Speaker 1: Eating disorder thought, I'm not even sick enough to have
Speaker 1: an eating disorder. Compassionate response. It doesn't matter what someone weighs,
Speaker 1: whether they have normal labs or medical complications, or how
Speaker 1: often they use behaviors. Everyone who is struggling with an
Speaker 1: unhealthy relationship to food and their body is sick enough
Speaker 1: and deserves to get treatment. It's not your fault that
Speaker 1: you developed an eating disorder. Eating disorders or mental illnesses
Speaker 1: that are caused by a combination of biopsychosocial factors. They
Speaker 1: are not choices. You are not weak or a bad
Speaker 1: person for struggling. You are someone who is doing the
Speaker 1: best that you can right now with the coping strategies
Speaker 1: that you have. Reaching out for help when you are
Speaker 1: struggling is true courage. It takes incredible to say, actually,
Speaker 1: I'm not okay and I need support. If you're struggling
Speaker 1: with feelings of shame around your eating disorder, you are
Speaker 1: not alone. The more that we can speak up about
Speaker 1: eating disorders, the more we can start to shatter the
Speaker 1: shame and stigma again. That's from Jennifer Rawlin. It's a
Speaker 1: blog post that she put up on her website that's
Speaker 1: called a Disorders and Feelings of Shame. So if any
Speaker 1: of those feelings of shame resonate with you, then make
Speaker 1: sure you give yourself the compassionate response. You might need
Speaker 1: to rewind and listen to some of those, or go
Speaker 1: to Jennifer Rowlin dot com r O L L I
Speaker 1: N to get this blog so you can print it out,
Speaker 1: keep it with you, type it into your phone, copy
Speaker 1: and paste it. Put it wherever you can see those
Speaker 1: compassionate responses, so that way you have a way to
Speaker 1: combat the feelings of shame again, stuff like I shouldn't
Speaker 1: feel so anxious around food. This shouldn't be so hard.
Speaker 1: It's my fault that I developed an eating disorder. I'm
Speaker 1: just such a shallow person. Those are feelings that can
Speaker 1: be natural. Shame is normal. There's nothing wrong with you. However,
Speaker 1: it's what you do with it. After you have the
Speaker 1: thought and you have a person right here, shout out
Speaker 1: Jennifer that has given you a compassionate response to yourself
Speaker 1: that will help you change the channel that will help
Speaker 1: you shut it down. Now. I had again so much
Speaker 1: shame with my eating disort of I said it earlier,
Speaker 1: like there you just it's very lonely. I would binge
Speaker 1: and purge. I felt like, oh, why couldn't I just
Speaker 1: not eat instead of being the person that eats so
Speaker 1: much and then chooses to, you know, get rid of
Speaker 1: it and purge it in a way, which purging you know,
Speaker 1: might have been an actual like purge type situation, or
Speaker 1: it might have been going to the gym for hours
Speaker 1: on end to try to burn all of the calories.
Speaker 1: So for me, oh, the weight of shame with the binging,
Speaker 1: I just felt like I had nobody to talk to
Speaker 1: For some reason. I felt like if I just didn't
Speaker 1: eat at all, that would be easier to talk to
Speaker 1: someone about, because you know, society understood that better. But
Speaker 1: the more and more people are talking about binging, the
Speaker 1: less shame I feel about it, and it feels more
Speaker 1: normal for me to talk about it. So that being said,
Speaker 1: I want to share a newsletter that I got from
Speaker 1: Katherine Hansen. She was a major part of my recovery.
Speaker 1: I've never met herror, but I hope that one day
Speaker 1: I get to tell her thank you for her book
Speaker 1: Brain over Binge, and for her podcast, Brain over Binge,
Speaker 1: and for her newsletters that are all about Brain over Binge.
Speaker 1: And I feel like since I felt so much shame
Speaker 1: around the binging that I did, and I had nobody
Speaker 1: to talk to, and I felt hopeless at times, and
Speaker 1: it was so hard to give up the binges and
Speaker 1: rewire my brain, and I'm thankful that Katherine was part
Speaker 1: of walking me through that, along with Lisa's fork, the
Speaker 1: Noise program and other tools that I got from other
Speaker 1: therapy that I have been doing. But I want to
Speaker 1: read a newsletter that Catherine sent out. Hopefully it'll be
Speaker 1: encouragement to y'all and maybe you'll want to go listen
Speaker 1: to an episode that could help you out if you
Speaker 1: happen to be someone that is struggling with binging right now,
Speaker 1: so Katherine wrote, you may feel frustrated that you've reduced
Speaker 1: your binge eating but haven't fully eliminated it from your life.
Speaker 1: So instead of celebrating your progress and making more improvements
Speaker 1: until the binge eating is gone, you may tell yourself
Speaker 1: that improvement is not good enough and that you might
Speaker 1: as well go back to binging more. It's okay to
Speaker 1: acknowledge that you want binge eating fully gone. Of course
Speaker 1: you do because it creates pain in your life. However,
Speaker 1: less binge eating means less pain in your life, and
Speaker 1: that's a step in the right direction. Going from binge
Speaker 1: eating daily, for example, to binge eating once per week
Speaker 1: leads to so much extra time, energy, money, and peace
Speaker 1: of mind. Do not let a transition period of less
Speaker 1: freak Went episodes make you want to return to full
Speaker 1: scale binging. Instead, allow your experience of additional freedom make
Speaker 1: you even more motivated to fully recover. For more motivation,
Speaker 1: listen to episode Creating Motivation to Stop binge eating. Okay, Amy,
Speaker 1: here that was the end of Catherine's little short newsletter,
Speaker 1: But episode of the Brain over Binge podcast is where
Speaker 1: you can find creating motivation to stop binge eating. And
Speaker 1: I just felt like somebody out there needs to hear that.
Speaker 1: And I wish I had had Catherine in my life
Speaker 1: or a podcast like that to listen to ten, fifteen,
Speaker 1: twenty years ago, but I didn't. And here we are,
Speaker 1: and slowly but surely again, I'm in what I like
Speaker 1: to consider my recovery, and my hope is that you
Speaker 1: will all get there too if that's what you need,
Speaker 1: or you'll be able to stay there, or you'll feel
Speaker 1: like you have the support, or you'll find the friends
Speaker 1: that you can talk to about it the right community
Speaker 1: for you. In the meantime, Lisa and I we want
Speaker 1: to be that community for you every Saturday Throughoutweigh and
Speaker 1: again we do love hearing from you. Thanks again to
Speaker 1: Sarah who sent that nice email that I read at
Speaker 1: the beginning of this podcast, and we appreciate it so much.
Speaker 1: It gives us the encouragement to to just keep going
Speaker 1: and keep putting out content, and keep putting out episodes
Speaker 1: and keep sharing because you know, one by one it
Speaker 1: is making a difference. And I just want each and
Speaker 1: every one of you listening today to know you are
Speaker 1: not alone, and if you need support, I hope that
Speaker 1: you will find a way to ask for it. There
Speaker 1: is no shame in what you're going through at all whatsoever.
Speaker 1: If you want to reach out to us again, the
Speaker 1: email is Hello Outweigh podcast dot com and I hope
Speaker 1: you'll have a great rest of your day and we'll
Speaker 1: see again next Saturday.